June 30, 2021 • 12 mins
The Therapy for Black Girls Podcast is a weekly conversation with Dr. Joy Harden Bradford, a licensed Psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia, about all things mental health, personal development, and all the small decisions we can make to become the best possible versions of ourselves.
Recently we've gotten a few questions in the mailbox about how to find the best therapist for you and your needs, so this week I'm offering some things to consider in terms of whether your therapist needs to be Black, questions to ask during your consultation, and getting referrals from friends, family, or colleagues.
Resources
Visit our Amazon Store for all the books mentioned on the podcast. therapyforblackgirls.com/amazon
Grab our Guide to Getting Started with Therapy therapyforblackgirls.com/gtgs
Stay Connected
Is there a topic you'd like covered on the podcast? Submit it at therapyforblackgirls.com/mailbox.
If you're looking for a therapist in your area, check out the directory at https://www.therapyforblackgirls.com/directory.
Take the info from the podcast to the next level by joining us in the Therapy for Black Girls Sister Circle community.therapyforblackgirls.com
Grab your copy of our guided affirmation and other TBG Merch at therapyforblackgirls.com/shop.
The hashtag for the podcast is #TBGinSession.
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Twitter: @therapy4bgirls
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Our Production Team
Executive Producers: Dennison Bradford & Yves Jeffcoat
Producer: Cindy Okereke
Assistant Producer: Ellice Ellis
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Kay, Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a
weekly conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the
small decisions we can make to become the best possible
(00:22):
versions of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr Joy hard and Bradford,
a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or
to find a therapist in your area, visit our website
at Therapy for Black Girls dot com. While I hope
you love listening to and learning from the podcast, it
(00:43):
is not meant to be a substitute for a relationship
with a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so
much for joining me for session to fourteen of the
Therapy for Black Girls Podcast. We'll get right into the
episode after a word from our sponsors. We've gotten a
(01:16):
few questions in our mailbox recently from community members about
finding the right therapist to work with, and this is
really important because research has been consistent in telling us
that the number one factor that dictates growth and therapy
is the relationship that we have with our therapists. If
the relationship is shaky, little else will matter. So it
(01:38):
makes sense that we want to be as thoughtful as
possible when deciding on who we're gonna work with. I
also think it speaks to why it's okay if you
don't really click with the first therapist you might work with,
because we know that we just don't jail with everybody.
Another question that has been asked a few times is
do I really need a black therapist? And again, and
(02:00):
I just think that this is an excellent question, and
it really depends on so many different factors. Now, clearly
this is the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. I started
our therapist directory because I saw so many sisters expressing
a desire to see a black woman therapist. So of
course I believe in having the option to see a
black woman therapist if that's what you want and if
(02:23):
that's what's going to be the best fit for you.
And I also think we have to be honest about
the numbers of black therapists that actually exist. So about
four percent of psychologists are black, about two percent of
psychiatrists are black. And though I've not seen the stats
for other clinicians like social workers, marriage and family therapists
(02:43):
are professional counselors, my guess is that the numbers in
those areas are small as well. The bottom line is
that there are still lots of work to be done
in creating opportunities for more black people to become therapists.
So there are simply not enough black therapists and meet
the needs for everybody who might actually want to see
a black therapist. And additionally, not everyone wants to see
(03:07):
a black therapist, which is also fine. For example, I've
had people talk with me about really wanting to see
a black woman therapist, but being concerned that they wouldn't
really be able to be vulnerable in that space because
they didn't want to fall apart in front of someone
who seemed like they had it all together. They are
really just so many different dynamics that are in play
(03:28):
when you're talking about the relationship with the therapist, and
they're all gonna be as unique as each of us is.
But when it comes down to it, you want to
find a therapist who will create a space comfortable for
you to share, who will challenge and support you, someone
who offers you perspectives that you might not have considered
(03:49):
and teaches you things about how to manage your emotional
life that you didn't know before. With that said, though,
I do want to offer you some things to consider
to help you find someone who's gonna be a great
fit for you. First, I want you to make a
list of things that are must has for you, and
these can be anything for any reason. Absolutely anything that
(04:11):
you deem important to you in working with a therapist
is completely fine to search for. For some people, it's
important to have imagined terms of culture. For other people,
it might be important to have imagined terms of age
or religion. Whatever it is for you, it's okay to
have that on your list. So when you think about
the people who feel most comfortable for you to talk to,
(04:34):
what comes up for you? What kinds of characteristics do
they possess, What kinds of people are settings help you
to feel safest and most comfortable. All of these answers
will give you a good indication of who might be
a good fit for you. In addition to these things,
you also want to consider what's a fit for you
(04:54):
in terms of your budget. Are you gonna be using
health insurance benefits are paying out of pocket? If you're
planning to use your health insurance, then a good place
to start would be to get a list of providers
in your area from your insurance company. And usually you
can find this in your benefits portal are on the
insurance company's website, and then narrow down that list based
(05:17):
on the other things that you said are important to you.
If you're not using insurance, then when you're searching, you'll
want to look for therapists whose rates are within your
budget are considered Therapists who offer a sliding scale, which
means the amount of pay maybe dependent on your income,
or perhaps they'll have a reduced rate they offer to
(05:37):
a few of their clients. Once you've got an idea
of your must haves and your budget, the next thing
you want to do is research therapist specialty areas. Now,
there are general things that we all learn as therapists,
but many of us go on to specialize in helping
certain communities, are certain concerns. For example, some therapists specialized
(05:59):
in working with couples and families, some specialized in working
with activists, some specialized in working with new moms, and
other therapists specialize in things like people struggling with anxiety.
They're literally endless ways to structure our practices. So it's
important for you to do your research to find a
therapist who's going to be a good match for you.
(06:20):
In terms of expertise. You can typically get a sense
of this from their profiles and the therapist directory, but
to dig even deeper, make sure to check out their websites,
where they typically go more in depth about who they are,
their training, and what kinds of clients they specialize in
working with. Someone even have a video you can watch
to get a better sense of their personality. I'd also
(06:42):
encourage you to check and see if they're active on
social media. You can typically get a good sense of
what clients they work with by what they share on
social media. And all of this research is important because
you may love a therapist personality on social media and
think that they're really cool, but if they don't specialize
in the concerns that are bringing you to therapy, it
(07:04):
might not actually be helpful for you. After you've done
your research and narrow down your list, the next step
would likely be a ten to fifteen minute consultation with
the therapists, and usually these are free. This is an
opportunity for you to ask any lingering questions that haven't
been answered during your research. Here are a few questions
(07:25):
you might want to add to your list. Number one,
how often do you work with clients presenting with my concern? Two?
Have you had specialized training in this area? Three? Do
you have the capacity to take on weekly clients right now?
And this might be important because if you're somebody who
(07:46):
knows that you want to have a weekly cadence to
your therapy sessions, you want to know this on the
front end, because if they only have the space for
bi weekly clients, then that may not be a good
therapist fit for you. No be Four do you have
a large case load of culturally diverse clients? Number five?
(08:07):
How comfortable are you with talking about issues of race, ethnicity,
oppression or privilege? And six what kind of work have
you done to ensure this is a safe space for
black people. The consultation is also an opportunity for your
therapist to hear a little about you and to make
(08:28):
a determination about whether they think they'd be a good
match as your therapist. If a therapist feels like their
area of expertise doesn't match what you might need, it's
important to let you know that on the front end
and offer recommendations to colleagues who might be a better
fit for you. More tips on finding a great therapist
after the break something else that may assist you in
(08:58):
finding a great therapist for you is asking for referrals
from friends, family, or colleagues. Just like we trust hairstylists
and nail technicians when our girls recommend them, I think
this can be important in therapy as well. My current
therapist is a black woman therapist who I found through
a referral from a friend, and my previous two therapists
(09:18):
were a white woman and a Latina woman who I
also started working with because a friend or a colleague
referred me to them. So if you feel comfortable asking
others who shared about therapy who they've seen, and they
feel comfortable sharing that information, this might be a great
way for you to find a therapist who might be
a good fit for you as well. And once you've
found the therapist you think is gonna be a good fit,
(09:41):
give yourself some time to ease into the relationship. There is,
of course no formula for how many sessions you need
to decide whether a therapist is going to be a
good fit, but I think that within the first three
to four sessions you can tell if this is a
person you can grow to feel comfortable sharing more with,
whether you feel listened to whether it feels like they
(10:01):
get you again. You may not be ready to share everything,
and that's totally appropriate, but I think four sessions is
enough time to know whether this is someone that's gonna
be a good fit for you or not. And sometimes
you'll know even before then. With this relationship, like any relationship,
it's important to listen to what your body is telling you.
(10:23):
If something feels off, talk with the therapist about it
to see if it can be addressed and resolved. But
if after that conversation it still doesn't feel right, it's
okay to search for someone else. And I know that
that process can be frustrating. It can be hard to
start all over, but it really does make all the
difference when you start working with a therapist who you
(10:44):
feel like really gets you. And because I know the
process of keeping track of which therapist you called and
which ones you liked when you're starting this search can
be taxing, we've created a handy guide to getting Started
with therapy for you to track the therapist you've kind
acted and to provide a space for you to reflect
on how you're feeling and what you need as you
start the process. You can grab it at Therapy for
(11:08):
Black Girls dot com slash g t G s Now,
it's time for you to weigh in. How did you
know your therapist was going to be a good fit
for you? Or did you initially set out to find
a certain kind of therapists and have been pleasantly surprised
with who you ended up working with? Share with us
if you feel comfortable, use the hashtag tv G in
(11:31):
session to share your thoughts or to respond to others.
And don't forget to text two of your girls right
now and tell them to check out the episode as well.
If you're looking for a therapist and you're brand new
in your search, be sure to check out our therapist
directory at Therapy for Black Girls dot com slash directory.
And if you want to continue digging into this topic
(11:52):
or just be in community with other sisters, come on
over and join us in the sister Circle. It's our
cozy corner of the internet does on just for black women.
You can join us at community dot Therapy for Black
Girls dot com. Thank you all so much for joining
me again this week. I look forward to continuing this
conversation with you all real soon. Take good care,
Kay, Welcome to the Therapy for Black Girls Podcast, a
weekly conversation about mental health, personal development, and all the
small decisions we can make to become the best possible
(00:22):
versions of ourselves. I'm your host, Dr Joy hard and Bradford,
a licensed psychologist in Atlanta, Georgia. For more information or
to find a therapist in your area, visit our website
at Therapy for Black Girls dot com. While I hope
you love listening to and learning from the podcast, it
(00:43):
is not meant to be a substitute for a relationship
with a licensed mental health professional. Hey, y'all, thanks so
much for joining me for session to fourteen of the
Therapy for Black Girls Podcast. We'll get right into the
episode after a word from our sponsors. We've gotten a
(01:16):
few questions in our mailbox recently from community members about
finding the right therapist to work with, and this is
really important because research has been consistent in telling us
that the number one factor that dictates growth and therapy
is the relationship that we have with our therapists. If
the relationship is shaky, little else will matter. So it
(01:38):
makes sense that we want to be as thoughtful as
possible when deciding on who we're gonna work with. I
also think it speaks to why it's okay if you
don't really click with the first therapist you might work with,
because we know that we just don't jail with everybody.
Another question that has been asked a few times is
do I really need a black therapist? And again, and
(02:00):
I just think that this is an excellent question, and
it really depends on so many different factors. Now, clearly
this is the Therapy for Black Girls podcast. I started
our therapist directory because I saw so many sisters expressing
a desire to see a black woman therapist. So of
course I believe in having the option to see a
black woman therapist if that's what you want and if
(02:23):
that's what's going to be the best fit for you.
And I also think we have to be honest about
the numbers of black therapists that actually exist. So about
four percent of psychologists are black, about two percent of
psychiatrists are black. And though I've not seen the stats
for other clinicians like social workers, marriage and family therapists
(02:43):
are professional counselors, my guess is that the numbers in
those areas are small as well. The bottom line is
that there are still lots of work to be done
in creating opportunities for more black people to become therapists.
So there are simply not enough black therapists and meet
the needs for everybody who might actually want to see
a black therapist. And additionally, not everyone wants to see
(03:07):
a black therapist, which is also fine. For example, I've
had people talk with me about really wanting to see
a black woman therapist, but being concerned that they wouldn't
really be able to be vulnerable in that space because
they didn't want to fall apart in front of someone
who seemed like they had it all together. They are
really just so many different dynamics that are in play
(03:28):
when you're talking about the relationship with the therapist, and
they're all gonna be as unique as each of us is.
But when it comes down to it, you want to
find a therapist who will create a space comfortable for
you to share, who will challenge and support you, someone
who offers you perspectives that you might not have considered
(03:49):
and teaches you things about how to manage your emotional
life that you didn't know before. With that said, though,
I do want to offer you some things to consider
to help you find someone who's gonna be a great
fit for you. First, I want you to make a
list of things that are must has for you, and
these can be anything for any reason. Absolutely anything that
(04:11):
you deem important to you in working with a therapist
is completely fine to search for. For some people, it's
important to have imagined terms of culture. For other people,
it might be important to have imagined terms of age
or religion. Whatever it is for you, it's okay to
have that on your list. So when you think about
the people who feel most comfortable for you to talk to,
(04:34):
what comes up for you? What kinds of characteristics do
they possess, What kinds of people are settings help you
to feel safest and most comfortable. All of these answers
will give you a good indication of who might be
a good fit for you. In addition to these things,
you also want to consider what's a fit for you
(04:54):
in terms of your budget. Are you gonna be using
health insurance benefits are paying out of pocket? If you're
planning to use your health insurance, then a good place
to start would be to get a list of providers
in your area from your insurance company. And usually you
can find this in your benefits portal are on the
insurance company's website, and then narrow down that list based
(05:17):
on the other things that you said are important to you.
If you're not using insurance, then when you're searching, you'll
want to look for therapists whose rates are within your
budget are considered Therapists who offer a sliding scale, which
means the amount of pay maybe dependent on your income,
or perhaps they'll have a reduced rate they offer to
(05:37):
a few of their clients. Once you've got an idea
of your must haves and your budget, the next thing
you want to do is research therapist specialty areas. Now,
there are general things that we all learn as therapists,
but many of us go on to specialize in helping
certain communities, are certain concerns. For example, some therapists specialized
(05:59):
in working with couples and families, some specialized in working
with activists, some specialized in working with new moms, and
other therapists specialize in things like people struggling with anxiety.
They're literally endless ways to structure our practices. So it's
important for you to do your research to find a
therapist who's going to be a good match for you.
(06:20):
In terms of expertise. You can typically get a sense
of this from their profiles and the therapist directory, but
to dig even deeper, make sure to check out their websites,
where they typically go more in depth about who they are,
their training, and what kinds of clients they specialize in
working with. Someone even have a video you can watch
to get a better sense of their personality. I'd also
(06:42):
encourage you to check and see if they're active on
social media. You can typically get a good sense of
what clients they work with by what they share on
social media. And all of this research is important because
you may love a therapist personality on social media and
think that they're really cool, but if they don't specialize
in the concerns that are bringing you to therapy, it
(07:04):
might not actually be helpful for you. After you've done
your research and narrow down your list, the next step
would likely be a ten to fifteen minute consultation with
the therapists, and usually these are free. This is an
opportunity for you to ask any lingering questions that haven't
been answered during your research. Here are a few questions
(07:25):
you might want to add to your list. Number one,
how often do you work with clients presenting with my concern? Two?
Have you had specialized training in this area? Three? Do
you have the capacity to take on weekly clients right now?
And this might be important because if you're somebody who
(07:46):
knows that you want to have a weekly cadence to
your therapy sessions, you want to know this on the
front end, because if they only have the space for
bi weekly clients, then that may not be a good
therapist fit for you. No be Four do you have
a large case load of culturally diverse clients? Number five?
(08:07):
How comfortable are you with talking about issues of race, ethnicity,
oppression or privilege? And six what kind of work have
you done to ensure this is a safe space for
black people. The consultation is also an opportunity for your
therapist to hear a little about you and to make
(08:28):
a determination about whether they think they'd be a good
match as your therapist. If a therapist feels like their
area of expertise doesn't match what you might need, it's
important to let you know that on the front end
and offer recommendations to colleagues who might be a better
fit for you. More tips on finding a great therapist
after the break something else that may assist you in
(08:58):
finding a great therapist for you is asking for referrals
from friends, family, or colleagues. Just like we trust hairstylists
and nail technicians when our girls recommend them, I think
this can be important in therapy as well. My current
therapist is a black woman therapist who I found through
a referral from a friend, and my previous two therapists
(09:18):
were a white woman and a Latina woman who I
also started working with because a friend or a colleague
referred me to them. So if you feel comfortable asking
others who shared about therapy who they've seen, and they
feel comfortable sharing that information, this might be a great
way for you to find a therapist who might be
a good fit for you as well. And once you've
found the therapist you think is gonna be a good fit,
(09:41):
give yourself some time to ease into the relationship. There is,
of course no formula for how many sessions you need
to decide whether a therapist is going to be a
good fit, but I think that within the first three
to four sessions you can tell if this is a
person you can grow to feel comfortable sharing more with,
whether you feel listened to whether it feels like they
(10:01):
get you again. You may not be ready to share everything,
and that's totally appropriate, but I think four sessions is
enough time to know whether this is someone that's gonna
be a good fit for you or not. And sometimes
you'll know even before then. With this relationship, like any relationship,
it's important to listen to what your body is telling you.
(10:23):
If something feels off, talk with the therapist about it
to see if it can be addressed and resolved. But
if after that conversation it still doesn't feel right, it's
okay to search for someone else. And I know that
that process can be frustrating. It can be hard to
start all over, but it really does make all the
difference when you start working with a therapist who you
(10:44):
feel like really gets you. And because I know the
process of keeping track of which therapist you called and
which ones you liked when you're starting this search can
be taxing, we've created a handy guide to getting Started
with therapy for you to track the therapist you've kind
acted and to provide a space for you to reflect
on how you're feeling and what you need as you
start the process. You can grab it at Therapy for
(11:08):
Black Girls dot com slash g t G s Now,
it's time for you to weigh in. How did you
know your therapist was going to be a good fit
for you? Or did you initially set out to find
a certain kind of therapists and have been pleasantly surprised
with who you ended up working with? Share with us
if you feel comfortable, use the hashtag tv G in
(11:31):
session to share your thoughts or to respond to others.
And don't forget to text two of your girls right
now and tell them to check out the episode as well.
If you're looking for a therapist and you're brand new
in your search, be sure to check out our therapist
directory at Therapy for Black Girls dot com slash directory.
And if you want to continue digging into this topic
(11:52):
or just be in community with other sisters, come on
over and join us in the sister Circle. It's our
cozy corner of the internet does on just for black women.
You can join us at community dot Therapy for Black
Girls dot com. Thank you all so much for joining
me again this week. I look forward to continuing this
conversation with you all real soon. Take good care,
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