Brian Spitulnik: Therapy, Trauma & Self-Compassion – An Unfiltered Conversation | Ep. 33

What really happens in therapy? And how do we begin to heal from the trauma we don’t even realize we’re carrying?



In Episode 33 of TURTZED, Charlie sits down with Brian Spitulnik, LMSW, a New York City-based therapist, for a candid, unscripted conversation about the realities of therapy, healing from trauma, and the lifelong process of personal growth.

Brian shares his unique journey from Broadway performer to therapist, and the impact of queerness, identity, and grief on his path. Together, they explore the emotional complexities of difficult relationships, the power of Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, and why the goodbye between therapist and client can be one of the most meaningful moments in the therapeutic relationship.

This episode blends personal reflection with professional insight—offering a rare, behind-the-scenes look at the emotional layers within therapy.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

You’ll hear an open, grounded conversation about the realities of therapy—from what really happens in a session to how therapists manage their own growth. Brian and Charlie dive into the layered effects of trauma, the connection between anger and unmet needs, and how compassion plays a central role in healing. Whether you’re in therapy, considering it, or just curious about how emotional growth works, this episode brings raw insight and resonance.

Key Takeaways:

Therapy is a Journey, Not a Fix – It’s not about achieving a final goal but learning to stay present with yourself over time.

Trauma Lives in the Body and Relationships – Unresolved pain often shows up in how we connect—or disconnect—from others.

The Therapeutic Relationship is a Mirror – The way we relate to our therapist often reflects our patterns in the outside world.

Internal Family Systems (IFS) Helps Us Meet Our Parts – Understanding our internal “parts” gives us more compassion and clarity.

Anger Points to What Needs Protection – When we listen to our anger, we discover what still hurts.

Self-Compassion is the Core of Growth – The more gently we treat ourselves, the more we create space for transformation.