Vacation Bible School Podcast

The Book of (First) Kings, chapters 11-16, a part of the Bible that's gonna sound like we chose it specifically because it was recorded in April 2025.

• But first, did you know the names of comically large wine bottle sizes are all named after Bible guys?
• Meet the rebel who might've been a big inspiration for the Moses story set centuries prior.
• Emily's as annoyed by Solomon as she has been by just about any character ...

We are so freaking back. We're joined by Seattle University professor emeritus Wes Howard-Brook, author of works like Come Out My People: God's Call Out of Empire in the Bible and Beyond, to discuss:

• King Solomon wasn't actually all that wise ...
• ... and the cutting-a-baby story isn't about what a great guy he was.
• In fact, the Bible's authors meant for us to view Solomon as just another Exodus pharaoh...

Hello! Let's sprint through a big (but action-packed) portion of the Book of Samuel and then focus on the story of King David and Bathsheba.

• Almost everything you've ever heard about this story has nothing to do with what's actually in the Bible, but what else is new?
• Around the 40-minute mark, we're joined by creator April Ajoy (of TikTok, Instagram, the Evangelicalish podcast, and more) to discuss the way ...

We're back in the Book of Samuel, starting in chapter 18, where giant-killer David meets Israel's other war hero, Prince Jonathan. To quote Taylor Swift, sparks fly. Platonic sparks, your Sunday school teacher assures you.

• There's a case these two were just extremely affectionate political allies. That case has been made, and we're not very interested in it. 
• Interpret this story however you want. We're ...

Samuel chapter 17!

• We've reached a Bible story everybody PRETTY MUCH knows, though there are still lots of fun details. It wasn't a slingshot, for one thing!
• Goliath is the Statue of Liberty of Michael Jordans, David is Mr. Have It Both Ways, and King Saul's descent into madness ramps up right now! 
• Emily is mostly concerned with whether this Philistine-Israelite war is cruelty-free toward animals.
• We're excited to ...

Samuel 7-16!

• The Bible contains a LOT of genres. Uh-oh, you're now in the middle of a Machiavellian historical novel about Derek Zoolander! 
• Time for our regular installment of Which Part Of This Story Will White Christian Americans Try To Contort Into Propaganda For White Christian America? 
• Does this episode include weird math, exaggerated war stuff, confusing prophet behavior, confusing food rules, weird anima...

We're entering a whole new chunk of the Bible, and it might be a surprise chunk!

• Why we're now in Samuel instead of Ruth, the book that's up next according to Christian Bibles! 
• Yet another barren womb! As always, when the Bible reuses a story, the variations are everything! 
• The Bible's first usage of "the messiah" is a fine time to talk about how poorly the average Christian understands the old, complex, ever-e...

It's time to bring on the internet's beloved Jon Bois to discuss:

• The Bible's best story book so far, if you have the non-exploding stomach for it: Judges.
• Meet Ehud, the left-handed sphincter-bursting assassin!
• Homeschool middle school during the end of the world!
• Christian culture stuff like Carman, MxPx, Five Iron Frenzy, James Dobson, Amy Grant, Creed, DC Talk, and comic Bibles!
• Plus Samson, Delilah, Gideon, Debora...

WAR DADS AND LADY WAR DADS ASSEMBLE. It's a new Bible section! 

• Joshua is the dude version of LIVE LAUGH LOVE, but also somehow the most feminist book yet. 
• Rahab, the Bible character whose job is most ignored by church, and also a military mastermind. 
• THE WALLS OF JERICHO: pretty cool, but mostly for reasons besides those made up by Sunday school, Carman, and Joel Osteen. 
• How can believers explain ...

• The final book of the Torah, the one we NEVER talked about in church, actually ... kinda rules at times? 
• In the story, at the edge of Canaan, Moses reframes everything that's happened to this point, retconning the horrors of Numbers and synthesizing the Bible's competing God ideas into one coherent theology that more or less works for everyone on earth (except the despicable Jebusites). 
• Upgraded lore, now includ...

The fourth book of the Bible! As always, remember the Bible has been written, edited, and interpreted by LOTS of people, and we're under no obligation to treat its angriest voices as definitive of the entire thing. 

• The actual story resumes! Things are finally happening! 
• Numbers gives us phrases like "wandering in the wilderness," "land of milk and honey," and "eww girls have cooties!" 
• There's a reason Sund...

Hi pals! Taking a break from the main Bible storyline to hit some listener questions, such as:

• What's the Protestant holiday calendar like? 
• Which Bible verse most contradicts its own book? 
• There's a Toad the Wet Sprocket song about the apostles being sick of Paul lol. 
• What are the Bible's best name meanings? 
• Every Catholic heresy, given a thumbs up or thumbs down! 
• Do animals have souls?&nb...

• Our first attempt at doing an entire book in one episode, and it  happens to be one of the weirdest, grossest, narrative-lightest books. Yay!
• Spending as little time as possible on the chapters about bodily discharges, we promise.
• Leviticus has Bad Verses! Drown the Bad Verses in dorky red tape ...
• ... and/or insist we simply become eco-socialists every seven years, as Leviticus clearly commands.
• Follow us on Twitte...

• Pretty much the whole last half of Exodus, except for the Ten Commandments-adjacent rules and the Golden Calf chapter
• Why yes, we DID have fun talking about quite arguably the most boring stretch of the whole Bible!
• Why yes, you CAN recreate a very accurate Tabernacle in Minecraft
• Let's talk high church "versus" low church
• Featuring special guest pastor Reverend Chris Lee of St John's With St Mary's Mansfield
• And! Let's!...

• Exodus 24, Exodus 32, and so forth (there's a whole lot of laws and blueprints mixed within the storyline) ...
• Think the Bible itself is weird? Wait'll you get a load of church history! 
• Unchallenged faith: is that really even faith? 
• Aaron at Mount Sinai: total idiot, good cop, willing scapegoat, nepotism hire, anarcho-pacifist, retcon reclamation, or all the above? 
• By now, Moses and God are an old marrie...

• Exodus 20! How many of these Ten do we agree to keep today? They all seem pretty simple, obvious, or outdated, right? Well!! 
• Tried something new: recorded a Zoom with a few of our Patreon Associate Pastors, plus Interfaith Council guests: Michael Elkon (@BravesAndBirds) and Hasan Masood (@hasmas)! 
• Let's hear it for idols! 
• Now Lord, when you say "murder," what do you mean by that? 
• Youth pastors tur...

• Exodus 19-20ish, the part about Moses leading the Israelites to meet Huge Loud Scary Firestorm God
• Greatest pyro entrance of all time
• Is monotheism having a moment?
• We're joined by Dr. Friedman (author of Who Wrote the Bible and many other books) to talk Prince of Egypt (he did some work on it), the Bible's overall storyline (it has at least one!), "Old Testament God vs. New Testament God" (not really a thing), the origin ...

Support for this program occurs at patreon.com/vbspodcast, where we have stickers, mugs, a Discord, hats (for now), early episode access, and so forth!

- Taking a break from the main storyline, where we're making hilariously little progress (but having fun anyway), to talk whatever y'all wanted.

- Oh family, it's testimony time! 

- Christian punk rock bands, ranked! 

- Why were Cain's veggies bad, if most of the diet...