March 5, 2025 • 21 mins
Episode 393: The #1 Mistake Holding Your Athlete Back from More Ice Time
In this episode of the Real Rich Grogan Warrior Confidence Hockey Podcast, Rich Grogan discusses the common frustrations players and parents face regarding limited ice time in hockey. He emphasizes the importance of accountability, energy, attitude, and body language in earning ice time. Rich provides actionable tips for both players and parents, including how to communicate effectively with coaches and the significance of standing out in practice. The episode concludes with encouragement for parents to support their children in their hockey journey and to foster a positive mindset.
Takeaways
Ice time is earned, not given.
Accountability lies with the player.
Energy, attitude, and body language are crucial.
Players must stand out to gain trust.
Ask coaches for guidance, don't demand.
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard.
Practice with intensity to prepare for games.
Mistakes are part of the learning process.
Communication with coaches should be respectful.
Encourage kids to share their unique talents.
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🔥 Welcome to Real Rich Grogan - Warrior Confidence Hockey: Unleashing Champions On & Off the Ice 🏒💪
🎙️ Hosted by Master Coach Rich Grogan, Founder of Warrior Confidence Hockey—Master Martial Artist, 2X Best-Selling, Award-winning Author, Mentor, Speaker, and Leadership Expert. With over 40 years in martial arts and 50 years in hockey, Rich empowers players, parents, and coaches to build confidence, respect, and leadership skills to thrive both on and off the ice.
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Chapters
00:00 Understanding Ice Time Frustrations
04:24 The Importance of Accountability
10:11 Energy, Attitude, and Body Language
14:41 Asking the Right Questions
18:58 Wrapping Up and Future Steps
#WarriorConfidence #HockeyLeadership #ChampionMindset #IceTimeTips #HockeyLife #RealRichGrogan #ParentLeadership #YouthHockey #BuildingChampions #SelfDiscipline #AccountabilityMatters #RightHookOfReality #SelfRespect #Discipline
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:42):
Are you and your hockey player frustrated about limited ice time?
You think, man, I'm doing everything I possibly can.
They're doing everything they can, but they're just not getting the ice time.
What in the world do need to do?
And you may even think, what's wrong with the coach?
Why isn't the coach noticing all the hard work?
Why isn't the coach noticing everything they're putting in?
Why isn't the coach playing them during crucial game situations?
Have you said that before?
(01:03):
Has your kid said that before?
Well, if you have, you're not alone.
But you're listening today because I'm going share with you the number one tip that mightbe holding your kiddo back.
and most importantly, what to do to fix it.
Stay tuned and be sure to share this with somebody you know could benefit as well.
(01:30):
Greetings champions.
Welcome to the Real Rich Grogan Warrior Confidence Hockey Podcast.
I'm your host, Master Coach Rich Grogan.
Truly grateful you're here today and hey listen, listen to that intro.
You heard it.
It's all about, what I always talk about, how to get more ice time and why is that soimportant?
Well, your kid works hard.
You're working hard as a parent supporting them.
(01:50):
You're doing everything you can but oftentimes we're missing those key little details,those little components.
Those little pieces that gonna help escalate your kids ice time, help them get noticed,help them gain the coaches trust, help them get what they want.
More ice time, more leadership roles, more opportunities to succeed.
I mean, that's why we play the game, right?
That's why we go to these early practices or late night practices.
(02:13):
Well, coming from as a player, parent, coach, martial artist, man, I've been around thegame for over 50 years, been a martial artist for 40 plus years.
So what I've done is I've tried to weave everything together here, give the best of allthe worlds.
to help you get what you and your kiddo wants the most.
Well, let's start with first things first.
And this is the right hook reality.
(02:33):
You know this, but this is a reminder, ice time is earned.
It's not given.
And you might be saying, yeah, I know that.
I know it's earned.
I know it's not given.
So I want to ask yourself this first.
If you were the coach, would you give your kid more ice time?
Have they worked hard enough?
Have they proven themselves in practice, in games, in the locker room?
(02:56):
And you may ask, well, I'm not in the locker room.
I don't see and understand what goes on.
Ask them.
And that's what I'm to be really transparent.
And I'm gonna hit you with some right hooks of reality.
And you know, some parents don't always like that, but I'm coming from the heart here,man.
I'm to give you everything that I've seen over, like I mentioned, the past 50 plus yearsaround the game of hockey, 40 plus years in martial arts, working with kids and athletes
(03:16):
and parents and coaches for, well, to close it on 40 years now of coaching as well.
I'm going to share with you what I've seen, what I know, and as a coach myself,
what I look for, for players.
So go back to the initial question.
Would you reward your own kiddo?
Are they doing the little extras that they need to do to get noticed?
(03:37):
So here's the question I want you to ask yourself and drop in the comments.
One, would I play my son more or my daughter more?
Yes or no?
And then give a reason why.
Then maybe if you wouldn't, give a reason why there as well.
Maybe they lack the confidence.
Maybe they lack the work ethic or the discipline.
Maybe their attitude isn't where it should be.
(03:58):
First thing to solve in a problem is addressing a problem.
And that's where we're coming at you with that right hook of reality is a shocker, right?
Well, really, no, it's not a shocker.
You already know it, but I'm here to hopefully remind you and help you.
So my whole goal, you listen to this, you taking time out of your busy day is to get whatyou want.
More ice time for the kiddo.
All right, well, this is episode number 393, and we titled this the number one mistakeholding most players back.
(04:24):
from getting more ice time.
Now we've covered a couple of those talking about asking you if you would reward your kid.
And that's where it starts, accountability.
And a big part of things I talk about in my books and my programs, anytime I talk toplayers, talk to parents, accountability is A number one.
The kiddo is the one that wants the ice time.
And of course, as a parent paying for all this and all the time you invest in it, you wantyour kid to get the ice time.
(04:47):
But accountability ultimately lies in on the player.
They're the ones that have to put in the work.
They're the ones that have to impress the coach.
They're the ones that coach has to trust.
Now can remember personally when I was younger, and I worked my butt off in practice.
Well, not always, but for the most part.
And I say that because I thought I was blending in with the crowd, doing just enough.
(05:12):
But see, I was always one of the smallest guys on every team I played on.
One of the shortest guys, smallest guys, didn't have a whole lot of athletic ability ortalent.
So I just kind of blended in because I wanted to fit in, right?
And a lot of kids do.
But I wouldn't get the ice time.
I was riding the pine, riding the bench.
And I had a coach come up to me once and say, hey, man, I'd love to play you more, but yougot to show me more in practice.
(05:33):
You got to show me that I can trust you.
You got to show me that you're confident enough with a puck that you're not going to turnit over, that you're going to work hard in front of the net.
You're going to work hard in the corners.
In practice, you're going to go all the way in line because you got a great attitude.
You want to do it, but you almost want to blend in more than you want to stand out.
And in order to get what you want, especially being a smaller guy, you got to stand outand get noticed.
(05:57):
And kind of mentioned this to my parents.
I grew up poor on a farm.
So I had farm chores.
And when I say farm chores, I'm talking baling hay, carrying hay bales that are heavierthan I was at the time, hand milking at eight, nine, 10 years old a cow.
And for those that don't know, cows do not freely give milk.
You earn every single drop.
(06:19):
And when you earn every single drop, you definitely know when to spill it.
And then other things, carrying buckets of water in the wintertime because the watertrough would freeze.
You had to break it up with sledgehammer.
So work ethic, I had a great work ethic, but being a little insecure as a kid, and I wasvery insecure.
I wanted to kind of fit in because I wanted to, know, with the cool kids.
Well, a lot of times the cool kids had more athletic ability and talent than I did.
(06:41):
They were getting more ice time.
They were bigger, taller, stronger, faster than I was.
And they would coast.
So I'm like, well.
you know, I'm just doing what they're doing.
Well, I'm telling you, if that's what your kiddo is doing, and you see that as a parent,you got to let them know you've got to stand out from the crowd.
Now I had the work ethic, I just from the farm, I just needed to apply it.
And I need a coach to tell me.
(07:02):
And I'm very grateful the coach mentioned that.
So what I do, I start standing out, man.
Every single drill, I gave it everything I had.
Because I realized it was coming from my dad as well.
And he had flat out said, look,
You work hard on the farm, work on the ice, and we're not paying for you to play anymore.
And growing up, like I mentioned, kind of poor, times were tough financially.
And hockey is not an inexpensive sport.
(07:24):
It's very expensive.
So I had the seed planted that, I love this game, but this could be, any given time, couldbe the last time I step on the ice because we may not be able to afford it.
And that's when, bang, kind of funny, I'm talking about this.
I got a shirt on that says flip the switch.
That's exactly what happened.
I flipped that switch, man.
(07:44):
I started every given all I got.
Now, was it easy?
No, because now I'm starting to stand out and starting to get noticed.
But then I got a little bit of a bullying and abuse in the locker room.
It'd be like, Richie, who do you think you are?
you're making us look bad.
And I'm like, holy cow, I can't win here.
And I'm telling you that because that may happen.
So that's why you have to keep that communication chain open with your kiddo there.
(08:07):
They want the ice time.
They got to be willing to work for it.
But at the same time, tell them in advance by doing these things by
And it's not like you're trying to show anybody up.
Everything I was trying to do was just to get noticed.
I wanted to get noticed because I wanted ice time.
I wanted the coach to trust me.
So every time I was on the ice, I had in my mind, this might be the last shift I ever getbecause I know what it's like to sit the bench and I didn't want to go back to sit in the
(08:30):
bench.
And as I got older, I kept that attitude and kept that mindset up and every team was on.
I was always one of the shortest, smallest guys, but gosh darn it.
I soon became one of the fastest guys.
Now I'm not telling you this to brag or to boast.
I'm just telling you,
that I had limited athletic ability and talent.
I mean, I had some, but size was not there.
But I always got rolls, penalty kill, power play, all the special teams late in the games.
(08:57):
Why?
I gained the coach's trust.
And of course, that flipped the switch in my brain.
When I start coaching, that's what I'm look for.
There's always going to be kids that are more talented.
And you've heard me talk about this before.
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard.
Kind of a motto I've lived by my whole life.
And that's the motto I want you to still in your kiddos there.
(09:17):
And then ask.
When they're in practice, watch them.
Ask them, hey, why'd you stop short of the line?
Why'd you, when the coach wasn't looking, you kind of coasted.
Don't do those things.
Because there's an old saying, it's kind of a military term.
When the coach isn't watching, I'm sorry, when the coach isn't looking, that's whenthey're watching the most.
Yeah.
And if can't trust a player in practice, there's no way in the world we're going to trustthem in a crucial game situation.
(09:42):
So what's the number one thing holding most kids back?
Energy, attitude, body language.
I all those kind of work together.
And body language, if the coach is talking to you, tell the kid he'll need to be focused.
Have them work with you on that.
When you're talking to them, tell them they need to look in your eyes so they fullyunderstand.
Therefore, they've got your undivided attention.
They know exactly what you're saying.
(10:04):
They're looking at you, not distracted by all the surroundings.
Put the doggone phone down.
Why?
You're training them.
So when the coach is talking to them, they do that.
They look instead of, I know, head down, shoulders forward, slumping.
Nobody likes that.
It's terrible body language, terrible posture, terrible attitude.
That's not a way to gain the coach's trust.
(10:26):
Shoulders back, head up.
And when a coach talks to you, yes, coach.
Working with countless coaches over all the decades have been around the game andcoaching.
One thing we, none of us like is when we tell a kid something,
We're trying to help them and then they say, yeah, I know.
Well, gosh darn it, if you knew, why'd you do it?
(10:49):
So train your kiddos, share this with them, tell them the coach talks to you, just sayyes, coach and move forward.
And I get it as teenagers, teenagers know everything about everything about everything.
And I talked to the kids in the locker room is exact same way that I'm talking right now,kind of sharing this with the parents so you can share this with your kiddo.
They have to help them.
(11:11):
get what they want most, which is more ice time.
And I say, well, when I was a teenager, I knew everything.
And then as I got older, I realized, man, I was an idiot as a teenager.
I don't want you to be the same idiot I was.
So be humble enough to realize when the coach is talking to you, and the coach has quite abit more experience, you may not think he's right.
You may not always agree, but listen and learn.
(11:33):
If anything, I learned a lot from coaches growing up.
had a lot of good coaches.
a lot of not so good coaches and unfortunately a lot of bad coaches.
And that's just the reality of things.
But if you can learn from all of them, you can continue to grow.
(11:54):
So what's the number one thing holding most players back?
Their energy, their attitude, their body language.
Change that.
Change their mindset.
Have them work hard at practice.
Have them stand out and get noticed.
Especially if they're a smaller player like I was.
I sure as heck was not going to get the attention out there being one of the smaller guys.
(12:14):
I was dwarfed by everybody out there.
You start standing out.
You start winning puck battles.
You start winning when you're the killers and when you're doing circles, you're doing linedrills and you're one of the first ones to finish every single time.
That coach like, holy cow, why you're willing to put in the work.
Therefore I can trust you to put in the work in a game as well.
(12:34):
Because how you practice is saying I said all the time in martial arts, can't always saidhow you practice, how you perform.
I twisted a little bit for hockey.
It's how you practice, how you play.
You practice hard.
You practice with great intensity.
You give it all you got.
you're going to play the same way.
Like flip the switch we just talked about.
And this is another example I give to players all the time.
I'll actually in the locker room, flip the light off and flip it back on.
(12:57):
Well, that gets her attention.
Like, happened?
I said, what happened when I flipped that light switch on?
They go, the lights came on.
Yes, the lights did come on.
But the reason lights came on because that energy was already there built up waiting to bereleased.
All I had to do was flip the switch.
And when I flipped the switch, the power and the energy was there.
The lights came on.
However,
If that power and energy was not there, if it wasn't built up, that stored energy wasn'tthere waiting for the switch to be flipped, nothing would happen.
(13:23):
Like when the power's out and you flip the switch off and on, nothing happens.
So if you don't build up that energy in practice, you don't build up that energy preparingby doing your very, best, winning puck battles in practice, winning face-offs in practice,
going all out on drills, skating drills, passing drills, shooting drills in practice, yougo to flip the switch in the game, there ain't gonna be anything there.
(13:45):
There you go.
There's another solid tip on how to help your kiddo get ice time.
And the last little tidbit, parents, we've talked about this at length as well.
We'll continue to talk about it more on upcoming episodes.
Your role is don't go to the coach before you go to your kiddo.
Meaning, hold them accountable.
(14:06):
They're the ones.
Now, it's a little plug for my book here, How to Get More Ice Time, new release to Amazonbestseller.
Thank you to all who've bought a copy.
If you haven't,
The link is in the in the description box.
You go to get more ice time dot com, go right to Amazon, pick up a copy and then ourprogram, which is based off the book or workbook.
(14:27):
Man, man, we got well, we got a master class, a quick start guide book, and then theworkbooks kind of complete program.
Everything in there is all about helping kiddos take accountability.
And one of the things I talk about there is before you go to the coach and.
And what is another thing?
Ask, don't tell.
Don't tell the coach, hey, my kid's been working hard.
Gosh darn it.
They need ice time.
That's never going to fly.
(14:48):
Ask, hey, what could my kid be doing in order to earn ice time?
That's respectful.
And that's the coach is going to take it and receive that in respectful manner.
But the whole thing about the program, we've got several programs and the links for theprogram are in the description box as well.
And that is going to help your kiddo get more ice time because it's going to go over allkinds of tips and strategies.
(15:08):
But for parents, it's going to be
You're asking for clarification and still telling the coach, but at the same time, theprogram holds the kid accountable to do what they know they need to do.
And even if they don't know what they need to do, it's in the book.
It's in the program.
So pick up a copy if you haven't already.
Good, good.
All right.
So your homework, parents, parents, I don't want any homework.
(15:30):
What are you talking about here, man?
Hey, we all got to be in this together.
And the biggest homework you have is ask yourself, would I play my kid more?
And don't be biased.
I know you're your son or your daughter.
You want to give more ice time, but have they earned it?
And you got to be honest.
Got to be honest.
Now, if they are putting in the work, they are doing everything and still they're beingoverlooked, then politely go to the coach and use the ask, don't tell philosophy and ask,
(15:56):
Hey, my kid's doing this.
He's doing all these extra things.
He's reading the books, doing the programs.
What else would you recommend that he do in order to earn some ice time?
There's not a coach a lie.
Well, I'm sure there's some jerks out there that would have a problem with that.
But 99.9 % of the coaches would say, hey, I appreciate that.
You know what?
Have them work on this, this, and this.
(16:16):
Show me in practice.
And yeah, that's the first step to getting more ice time.
As a parent, you've respectfully approached the coach.
You haven't put them on the defensive.
You haven't been rude.
You've asked for clarification.
Now everybody is working together.
The coach knows that you want
The kid wants ice time.
Coach already knows that.
But I Coach knows that every kid, that's what they want is more ice time.
(16:37):
But they got to earn it.
And they got to earn the coach's trust by doing the things in practice, by standing out,by building that energy.
So when they flip the switch in the game, when they get on the ice in the game, man, theygot all that energy built up.
They just flip that switch, baby.
And it happens.
Now, does that mean they're never going to make a mistake on the ice?
No, we're human.
(16:58):
We're going to continuously make mistakes.
And that's something I talked about at length on other shows.
But a champion is not someone who's never failed before.
A champion is someone who's failed over and over and over again, but refuses to give up.
A champion learns from those mistakes, learns from those failures.
They get back up.
They fight twice as hard.
They go at it.
They sit on the bench and develop their hockey IQ by watching the game instead of, man, soterrible.
(17:23):
I messed up again.
Hey, you messed up.
Take five seconds.
Breathe in, breathe out, get over it.
You know, my youngest son's a goalie.
So goalies are meant to get scored on.
So when you get scored on, okay, what could I have done differently?
All right, my angle was off.
I kept my glove hand down.
All right, I gotta fix that.
Boom, take a shot of water.
(17:44):
I'm back in the game because if he keeps dwelling on the mistake or the bad goal or softgoals, which happened, then he's gonna let in another one.
And now he's gonna be thinking about that one.
The same thing with your player.
If they make a mistake, maybe they're defensemen and they don't have good gap closure.
They turn the puck over.
Alright, learn from it.
You may get some bench time because of it.
That's how you learn.
(18:04):
But when you're on the bench, you're watching what could I do better?
And they get back in the game and prove that you they deserve to be on the ice.
So now I know I'm talking to parents and coaches.
I realized that most kids aren't listening to my podcast or watching my video blogs.
I would love it if they did.
So if you found value in this, please share it with them.
(18:25):
Listen to it in the car because I'm essentially telling you the secrets, the gifts on howto get that ice time.
And a lot of times I'm saying everything that if you're a coach listening, which you'realready saying, and a lot of parents are already saying the same thing.
But if they hear it coming from a different voice, you know how that goes, right?
You could say the same thing over and over and over your kiddo, and it's like, they don'teven hear a darn thing, and then somebody else says the exact same thing, and they're
(18:47):
like, hey, okay, I'll try that.
And you're like, what the heck?
I've been saying that for years.
But that's just that third voice, right?
All right, so hey, thank you so much for tuning in today.
a new little format with the podcast here.
I'm gonna shorten them up quite a bit.
We're gonna go right about 20 minutes is the max and wrap these things up, kind ofbite-sized pieces.
And we're also going to get my email list going again.
(19:11):
So I'm gonna be sending out weekly emails with tidbits, little tips to help, well, helpyou as a parent, help you as a coach, but also the whole goal is to share with the kiddos
there in order to help them get what they want most.
All right, more ice time.
As I mentioned, our program,
Check it out.
The link is in the description box.
They want to get more ice time, simple as nine bucks for a master class video.
(19:33):
Nine dollars, come on.
And then we got a little order bump there.
If you wanted the quick start guidebook, it's a few dollars more.
And then if you wanted the whole program, that's a few dollars more as well.
And for your team, doing this team leadership and accountability system.
So that's something you'll contact me and we'll talk about it.
And you can reach out to me, DM me on social media platforms.
(19:56):
at Real Rich Grogan or right through the podcast app as well.
All right.
All right.
Well, if you're watching on YouTube, make sure you like, subscribe, ring that bell onpodcast platforms.
We love those five star reviews.
It helps rate us higher in the search engines so more people can find us.
And most importantly, if you found value in this, share it with someone else that you knowcould find value and make sure you share it with your kiddos as well.
(20:18):
So do me a favor, drop in the comments, know, give me a thumbs up that you're going toapply this.
Give me a thumbs up.
You're going to share it with your kiddos.
or if you've got some questions, please ask and I'll do my best to get reply back to everycomment.
Alright everybody, thank you so very much for tuning in.
I love you, God loves you.
Please share that gift, share that love, share, have your kids share their gift, becausewe're all got unique talents and the world needs those unique talents.
(20:43):
Share it.
And until we talk again, you get out there and do your best, be your best as a parent andhelp grow future leaders.
Do your best and I promise you'll be your very best.
God bless you.
God bless your loved ones.
I can't wait to read your comments and I can't wait to chat with you again real soon.
Have a blessed day.
Bye bye.
Are you and your hockey player frustrated about limited ice time?
You think, man, I'm doing everything I possibly can.
They're doing everything they can, but they're just not getting the ice time.
What in the world do need to do?
And you may even think, what's wrong with the coach?
Why isn't the coach noticing all the hard work?
Why isn't the coach noticing everything they're putting in?
Why isn't the coach playing them during crucial game situations?
Have you said that before?
(01:03):
Has your kid said that before?
Well, if you have, you're not alone.
But you're listening today because I'm going share with you the number one tip that mightbe holding your kiddo back.
and most importantly, what to do to fix it.
Stay tuned and be sure to share this with somebody you know could benefit as well.
(01:30):
Greetings champions.
Welcome to the Real Rich Grogan Warrior Confidence Hockey Podcast.
I'm your host, Master Coach Rich Grogan.
Truly grateful you're here today and hey listen, listen to that intro.
You heard it.
It's all about, what I always talk about, how to get more ice time and why is that soimportant?
Well, your kid works hard.
You're working hard as a parent supporting them.
(01:50):
You're doing everything you can but oftentimes we're missing those key little details,those little components.
Those little pieces that gonna help escalate your kids ice time, help them get noticed,help them gain the coaches trust, help them get what they want.
More ice time, more leadership roles, more opportunities to succeed.
I mean, that's why we play the game, right?
That's why we go to these early practices or late night practices.
(02:13):
Well, coming from as a player, parent, coach, martial artist, man, I've been around thegame for over 50 years, been a martial artist for 40 plus years.
So what I've done is I've tried to weave everything together here, give the best of allthe worlds.
to help you get what you and your kiddo wants the most.
Well, let's start with first things first.
And this is the right hook reality.
(02:33):
You know this, but this is a reminder, ice time is earned.
It's not given.
And you might be saying, yeah, I know that.
I know it's earned.
I know it's not given.
So I want to ask yourself this first.
If you were the coach, would you give your kid more ice time?
Have they worked hard enough?
Have they proven themselves in practice, in games, in the locker room?
(02:56):
And you may ask, well, I'm not in the locker room.
I don't see and understand what goes on.
Ask them.
And that's what I'm to be really transparent.
And I'm gonna hit you with some right hooks of reality.
And you know, some parents don't always like that, but I'm coming from the heart here,man.
I'm to give you everything that I've seen over, like I mentioned, the past 50 plus yearsaround the game of hockey, 40 plus years in martial arts, working with kids and athletes
(03:16):
and parents and coaches for, well, to close it on 40 years now of coaching as well.
I'm going to share with you what I've seen, what I know, and as a coach myself,
what I look for, for players.
So go back to the initial question.
Would you reward your own kiddo?
Are they doing the little extras that they need to do to get noticed?
(03:37):
So here's the question I want you to ask yourself and drop in the comments.
One, would I play my son more or my daughter more?
Yes or no?
And then give a reason why.
Then maybe if you wouldn't, give a reason why there as well.
Maybe they lack the confidence.
Maybe they lack the work ethic or the discipline.
Maybe their attitude isn't where it should be.
(03:58):
First thing to solve in a problem is addressing a problem.
And that's where we're coming at you with that right hook of reality is a shocker, right?
Well, really, no, it's not a shocker.
You already know it, but I'm here to hopefully remind you and help you.
So my whole goal, you listen to this, you taking time out of your busy day is to get whatyou want.
More ice time for the kiddo.
All right, well, this is episode number 393, and we titled this the number one mistakeholding most players back.
(04:24):
from getting more ice time.
Now we've covered a couple of those talking about asking you if you would reward your kid.
And that's where it starts, accountability.
And a big part of things I talk about in my books and my programs, anytime I talk toplayers, talk to parents, accountability is A number one.
The kiddo is the one that wants the ice time.
And of course, as a parent paying for all this and all the time you invest in it, you wantyour kid to get the ice time.
(04:47):
But accountability ultimately lies in on the player.
They're the ones that have to put in the work.
They're the ones that have to impress the coach.
They're the ones that coach has to trust.
Now can remember personally when I was younger, and I worked my butt off in practice.
Well, not always, but for the most part.
And I say that because I thought I was blending in with the crowd, doing just enough.
(05:12):
But see, I was always one of the smallest guys on every team I played on.
One of the shortest guys, smallest guys, didn't have a whole lot of athletic ability ortalent.
So I just kind of blended in because I wanted to fit in, right?
And a lot of kids do.
But I wouldn't get the ice time.
I was riding the pine, riding the bench.
And I had a coach come up to me once and say, hey, man, I'd love to play you more, but yougot to show me more in practice.
(05:33):
You got to show me that I can trust you.
You got to show me that you're confident enough with a puck that you're not going to turnit over, that you're going to work hard in front of the net.
You're going to work hard in the corners.
In practice, you're going to go all the way in line because you got a great attitude.
You want to do it, but you almost want to blend in more than you want to stand out.
And in order to get what you want, especially being a smaller guy, you got to stand outand get noticed.
(05:57):
And kind of mentioned this to my parents.
I grew up poor on a farm.
So I had farm chores.
And when I say farm chores, I'm talking baling hay, carrying hay bales that are heavierthan I was at the time, hand milking at eight, nine, 10 years old a cow.
And for those that don't know, cows do not freely give milk.
You earn every single drop.
(06:19):
And when you earn every single drop, you definitely know when to spill it.
And then other things, carrying buckets of water in the wintertime because the watertrough would freeze.
You had to break it up with sledgehammer.
So work ethic, I had a great work ethic, but being a little insecure as a kid, and I wasvery insecure.
I wanted to kind of fit in because I wanted to, know, with the cool kids.
Well, a lot of times the cool kids had more athletic ability and talent than I did.
(06:41):
They were getting more ice time.
They were bigger, taller, stronger, faster than I was.
And they would coast.
So I'm like, well.
you know, I'm just doing what they're doing.
Well, I'm telling you, if that's what your kiddo is doing, and you see that as a parent,you got to let them know you've got to stand out from the crowd.
Now I had the work ethic, I just from the farm, I just needed to apply it.
And I need a coach to tell me.
(07:02):
And I'm very grateful the coach mentioned that.
So what I do, I start standing out, man.
Every single drill, I gave it everything I had.
Because I realized it was coming from my dad as well.
And he had flat out said, look,
You work hard on the farm, work on the ice, and we're not paying for you to play anymore.
And growing up, like I mentioned, kind of poor, times were tough financially.
And hockey is not an inexpensive sport.
(07:24):
It's very expensive.
So I had the seed planted that, I love this game, but this could be, any given time, couldbe the last time I step on the ice because we may not be able to afford it.
And that's when, bang, kind of funny, I'm talking about this.
I got a shirt on that says flip the switch.
That's exactly what happened.
I flipped that switch, man.
(07:44):
I started every given all I got.
Now, was it easy?
No, because now I'm starting to stand out and starting to get noticed.
But then I got a little bit of a bullying and abuse in the locker room.
It'd be like, Richie, who do you think you are?
you're making us look bad.
And I'm like, holy cow, I can't win here.
And I'm telling you that because that may happen.
So that's why you have to keep that communication chain open with your kiddo there.
(08:07):
They want the ice time.
They got to be willing to work for it.
But at the same time, tell them in advance by doing these things by
And it's not like you're trying to show anybody up.
Everything I was trying to do was just to get noticed.
I wanted to get noticed because I wanted ice time.
I wanted the coach to trust me.
So every time I was on the ice, I had in my mind, this might be the last shift I ever getbecause I know what it's like to sit the bench and I didn't want to go back to sit in the
(08:30):
bench.
And as I got older, I kept that attitude and kept that mindset up and every team was on.
I was always one of the shortest, smallest guys, but gosh darn it.
I soon became one of the fastest guys.
Now I'm not telling you this to brag or to boast.
I'm just telling you,
that I had limited athletic ability and talent.
I mean, I had some, but size was not there.
But I always got rolls, penalty kill, power play, all the special teams late in the games.
(08:57):
Why?
I gained the coach's trust.
And of course, that flipped the switch in my brain.
When I start coaching, that's what I'm look for.
There's always going to be kids that are more talented.
And you've heard me talk about this before.
Hard work beats talent when talent doesn't work hard.
Kind of a motto I've lived by my whole life.
And that's the motto I want you to still in your kiddos there.
(09:17):
And then ask.
When they're in practice, watch them.
Ask them, hey, why'd you stop short of the line?
Why'd you, when the coach wasn't looking, you kind of coasted.
Don't do those things.
Because there's an old saying, it's kind of a military term.
When the coach isn't watching, I'm sorry, when the coach isn't looking, that's whenthey're watching the most.
Yeah.
And if can't trust a player in practice, there's no way in the world we're going to trustthem in a crucial game situation.
(09:42):
So what's the number one thing holding most kids back?
Energy, attitude, body language.
I all those kind of work together.
And body language, if the coach is talking to you, tell the kid he'll need to be focused.
Have them work with you on that.
When you're talking to them, tell them they need to look in your eyes so they fullyunderstand.
Therefore, they've got your undivided attention.
They know exactly what you're saying.
(10:04):
They're looking at you, not distracted by all the surroundings.
Put the doggone phone down.
Why?
You're training them.
So when the coach is talking to them, they do that.
They look instead of, I know, head down, shoulders forward, slumping.
Nobody likes that.
It's terrible body language, terrible posture, terrible attitude.
That's not a way to gain the coach's trust.
(10:26):
Shoulders back, head up.
And when a coach talks to you, yes, coach.
Working with countless coaches over all the decades have been around the game andcoaching.
One thing we, none of us like is when we tell a kid something,
We're trying to help them and then they say, yeah, I know.
Well, gosh darn it, if you knew, why'd you do it?
(10:49):
So train your kiddos, share this with them, tell them the coach talks to you, just sayyes, coach and move forward.
And I get it as teenagers, teenagers know everything about everything about everything.
And I talked to the kids in the locker room is exact same way that I'm talking right now,kind of sharing this with the parents so you can share this with your kiddo.
They have to help them.
(11:11):
get what they want most, which is more ice time.
And I say, well, when I was a teenager, I knew everything.
And then as I got older, I realized, man, I was an idiot as a teenager.
I don't want you to be the same idiot I was.
So be humble enough to realize when the coach is talking to you, and the coach has quite abit more experience, you may not think he's right.
You may not always agree, but listen and learn.
(11:33):
If anything, I learned a lot from coaches growing up.
had a lot of good coaches.
a lot of not so good coaches and unfortunately a lot of bad coaches.
And that's just the reality of things.
But if you can learn from all of them, you can continue to grow.
(11:54):
So what's the number one thing holding most players back?
Their energy, their attitude, their body language.
Change that.
Change their mindset.
Have them work hard at practice.
Have them stand out and get noticed.
Especially if they're a smaller player like I was.
I sure as heck was not going to get the attention out there being one of the smaller guys.
(12:14):
I was dwarfed by everybody out there.
You start standing out.
You start winning puck battles.
You start winning when you're the killers and when you're doing circles, you're doing linedrills and you're one of the first ones to finish every single time.
That coach like, holy cow, why you're willing to put in the work.
Therefore I can trust you to put in the work in a game as well.
(12:34):
Because how you practice is saying I said all the time in martial arts, can't always saidhow you practice, how you perform.
I twisted a little bit for hockey.
It's how you practice, how you play.
You practice hard.
You practice with great intensity.
You give it all you got.
you're going to play the same way.
Like flip the switch we just talked about.
And this is another example I give to players all the time.
I'll actually in the locker room, flip the light off and flip it back on.
(12:57):
Well, that gets her attention.
Like, happened?
I said, what happened when I flipped that light switch on?
They go, the lights came on.
Yes, the lights did come on.
But the reason lights came on because that energy was already there built up waiting to bereleased.
All I had to do was flip the switch.
And when I flipped the switch, the power and the energy was there.
The lights came on.
However,
If that power and energy was not there, if it wasn't built up, that stored energy wasn'tthere waiting for the switch to be flipped, nothing would happen.
(13:23):
Like when the power's out and you flip the switch off and on, nothing happens.
So if you don't build up that energy in practice, you don't build up that energy preparingby doing your very, best, winning puck battles in practice, winning face-offs in practice,
going all out on drills, skating drills, passing drills, shooting drills in practice, yougo to flip the switch in the game, there ain't gonna be anything there.
(13:45):
There you go.
There's another solid tip on how to help your kiddo get ice time.
And the last little tidbit, parents, we've talked about this at length as well.
We'll continue to talk about it more on upcoming episodes.
Your role is don't go to the coach before you go to your kiddo.
Meaning, hold them accountable.
(14:06):
They're the ones.
Now, it's a little plug for my book here, How to Get More Ice Time, new release to Amazonbestseller.
Thank you to all who've bought a copy.
If you haven't,
The link is in the in the description box.
You go to get more ice time dot com, go right to Amazon, pick up a copy and then ourprogram, which is based off the book or workbook.
(14:27):
Man, man, we got well, we got a master class, a quick start guide book, and then theworkbooks kind of complete program.
Everything in there is all about helping kiddos take accountability.
And one of the things I talk about there is before you go to the coach and.
And what is another thing?
Ask, don't tell.
Don't tell the coach, hey, my kid's been working hard.
Gosh darn it.
They need ice time.
That's never going to fly.
(14:48):
Ask, hey, what could my kid be doing in order to earn ice time?
That's respectful.
And that's the coach is going to take it and receive that in respectful manner.
But the whole thing about the program, we've got several programs and the links for theprogram are in the description box as well.
And that is going to help your kiddo get more ice time because it's going to go over allkinds of tips and strategies.
(15:08):
But for parents, it's going to be
You're asking for clarification and still telling the coach, but at the same time, theprogram holds the kid accountable to do what they know they need to do.
And even if they don't know what they need to do, it's in the book.
It's in the program.
So pick up a copy if you haven't already.
Good, good.
All right.
So your homework, parents, parents, I don't want any homework.
(15:30):
What are you talking about here, man?
Hey, we all got to be in this together.
And the biggest homework you have is ask yourself, would I play my kid more?
And don't be biased.
I know you're your son or your daughter.
You want to give more ice time, but have they earned it?
And you got to be honest.
Got to be honest.
Now, if they are putting in the work, they are doing everything and still they're beingoverlooked, then politely go to the coach and use the ask, don't tell philosophy and ask,
(15:56):
Hey, my kid's doing this.
He's doing all these extra things.
He's reading the books, doing the programs.
What else would you recommend that he do in order to earn some ice time?
There's not a coach a lie.
Well, I'm sure there's some jerks out there that would have a problem with that.
But 99.9 % of the coaches would say, hey, I appreciate that.
You know what?
Have them work on this, this, and this.
(16:16):
Show me in practice.
And yeah, that's the first step to getting more ice time.
As a parent, you've respectfully approached the coach.
You haven't put them on the defensive.
You haven't been rude.
You've asked for clarification.
Now everybody is working together.
The coach knows that you want
The kid wants ice time.
Coach already knows that.
But I Coach knows that every kid, that's what they want is more ice time.
(16:37):
But they got to earn it.
And they got to earn the coach's trust by doing the things in practice, by standing out,by building that energy.
So when they flip the switch in the game, when they get on the ice in the game, man, theygot all that energy built up.
They just flip that switch, baby.
And it happens.
Now, does that mean they're never going to make a mistake on the ice?
No, we're human.
(16:58):
We're going to continuously make mistakes.
And that's something I talked about at length on other shows.
But a champion is not someone who's never failed before.
A champion is someone who's failed over and over and over again, but refuses to give up.
A champion learns from those mistakes, learns from those failures.
They get back up.
They fight twice as hard.
They go at it.
They sit on the bench and develop their hockey IQ by watching the game instead of, man, soterrible.
(17:23):
I messed up again.
Hey, you messed up.
Take five seconds.
Breathe in, breathe out, get over it.
You know, my youngest son's a goalie.
So goalies are meant to get scored on.
So when you get scored on, okay, what could I have done differently?
All right, my angle was off.
I kept my glove hand down.
All right, I gotta fix that.
Boom, take a shot of water.
(17:44):
I'm back in the game because if he keeps dwelling on the mistake or the bad goal or softgoals, which happened, then he's gonna let in another one.
And now he's gonna be thinking about that one.
The same thing with your player.
If they make a mistake, maybe they're defensemen and they don't have good gap closure.
They turn the puck over.
Alright, learn from it.
You may get some bench time because of it.
That's how you learn.
(18:04):
But when you're on the bench, you're watching what could I do better?
And they get back in the game and prove that you they deserve to be on the ice.
So now I know I'm talking to parents and coaches.
I realized that most kids aren't listening to my podcast or watching my video blogs.
I would love it if they did.
So if you found value in this, please share it with them.
(18:25):
Listen to it in the car because I'm essentially telling you the secrets, the gifts on howto get that ice time.
And a lot of times I'm saying everything that if you're a coach listening, which you'realready saying, and a lot of parents are already saying the same thing.
But if they hear it coming from a different voice, you know how that goes, right?
You could say the same thing over and over and over your kiddo, and it's like, they don'teven hear a darn thing, and then somebody else says the exact same thing, and they're
(18:47):
like, hey, okay, I'll try that.
And you're like, what the heck?
I've been saying that for years.
But that's just that third voice, right?
All right, so hey, thank you so much for tuning in today.
a new little format with the podcast here.
I'm gonna shorten them up quite a bit.
We're gonna go right about 20 minutes is the max and wrap these things up, kind ofbite-sized pieces.
And we're also going to get my email list going again.
(19:11):
So I'm gonna be sending out weekly emails with tidbits, little tips to help, well, helpyou as a parent, help you as a coach, but also the whole goal is to share with the kiddos
there in order to help them get what they want most.
All right, more ice time.
As I mentioned, our program,
Check it out.
The link is in the description box.
They want to get more ice time, simple as nine bucks for a master class video.
(19:33):
Nine dollars, come on.
And then we got a little order bump there.
If you wanted the quick start guidebook, it's a few dollars more.
And then if you wanted the whole program, that's a few dollars more as well.
And for your team, doing this team leadership and accountability system.
So that's something you'll contact me and we'll talk about it.
And you can reach out to me, DM me on social media platforms.
(19:56):
at Real Rich Grogan or right through the podcast app as well.
All right.
All right.
Well, if you're watching on YouTube, make sure you like, subscribe, ring that bell onpodcast platforms.
We love those five star reviews.
It helps rate us higher in the search engines so more people can find us.
And most importantly, if you found value in this, share it with someone else that you knowcould find value and make sure you share it with your kiddos as well.
(20:18):
So do me a favor, drop in the comments, know, give me a thumbs up that you're going toapply this.
Give me a thumbs up.
You're going to share it with your kiddos.
or if you've got some questions, please ask and I'll do my best to get reply back to everycomment.
Alright everybody, thank you so very much for tuning in.
I love you, God loves you.
Please share that gift, share that love, share, have your kids share their gift, becausewe're all got unique talents and the world needs those unique talents.
(20:43):
Share it.
And until we talk again, you get out there and do your best, be your best as a parent andhelp grow future leaders.
Do your best and I promise you'll be your very best.
God bless you.
God bless your loved ones.
I can't wait to read your comments and I can't wait to chat with you again real soon.
Have a blessed day.
Bye bye.
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