December 7, 2025 • 40 mins
This week offers us an opportunity to embrace the most sensitive and transformative spiritual assignments we face: the fractures within our soul family. Through the lens of ancient Kabbalistic wisdom and real-life therapeutic insight, we dive into the deeper purpose behind the conflicts, estrangements, and emotional turbulence that arise in our closest relationships.
Together, we examine why the most difficult people in our lives are often the very channels through which our greatest blessings are meant to flow—and how pushing them away can unintentionally cut us off from the light we’re seeking. Our conversation uncovers a profound spiritual framework for understanding conflict, repair, and the divine design behind the relationships we’re tempted to reject.
Join us for the next episode of Weekly Energy Boost with @ElishevaBalas and special guest, @DrRachelGlik. Dr. Rachel Glik is a psychotherapist, a student and teacher at the Kabbalah Centre and the author of “A Soulful Marriage: Healing Your Relationship with Responsibility, Growth, Priority, and Purpose.”
Watch LIVE Sundays at 10 am PT / 1pm ET on The Kabbalah Centre YouTube or catch the latest episode wherever you listen to podcasts.
Find out more about our work, dig into our archives, and send us a message at www.weeklyenergyboost.com.
You can also help make Weekly Energy Boost possible by making a tax-deductible contribution at www.weeklyenergyboost.com/donate-today.
Together, we examine why the most difficult people in our lives are often the very channels through which our greatest blessings are meant to flow—and how pushing them away can unintentionally cut us off from the light we’re seeking. Our conversation uncovers a profound spiritual framework for understanding conflict, repair, and the divine design behind the relationships we’re tempted to reject.
Join us for the next episode of Weekly Energy Boost with @ElishevaBalas and special guest, @DrRachelGlik. Dr. Rachel Glik is a psychotherapist, a student and teacher at the Kabbalah Centre and the author of “A Soulful Marriage: Healing Your Relationship with Responsibility, Growth, Priority, and Purpose.”
Watch LIVE Sundays at 10 am PT / 1pm ET on The Kabbalah Centre YouTube or catch the latest episode wherever you listen to podcasts.
Find out more about our work, dig into our archives, and send us a message at www.weeklyenergyboost.com.
You can also help make Weekly Energy Boost possible by making a tax-deductible contribution at www.weeklyenergyboost.com/donate-today.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Good morning everyone, good evening, good afternoon wherever you are,
and welcome to this week's weekly energy boost. My name
is Elisheva, and today I have the honor and privilege
of sharing the mic with a longtime friend, student, and
just all around beautiful soul who also happens to be
(00:36):
a counselor for the soul. I would say, a professional
in the field of mental health and therapy who brings
the wisdom of Kabbala into her practice. And Rachel, thank
you for being here with me this morning. You were
with us. We were talking about it in COVID during
in twenty twenty, I think it was, and we were
talking about fear. If I'm not mistaken, anxiety and fear. Yeah,
(01:00):
to have you back, and we are discussing I think
one of the most profound and powerful topics. It's funny
because we touched on it in the summer in an
episode with danieln Orr, which I can also refer everyone
to later in the episode if they need.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
Some clarity.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
But today's topic is healing the fractures in our soul family.
And we've gotten so many questions over the years about friction,
conflict repair, how to deal with difficult parents, children, siblings, partners, spouse,
you know, the whole thing. And I'm always so excited
(01:41):
when the energy of the week supports us to do
deep healing work, or at least to bring those fractures
to our awareness. And today's episode is all about shifting
how we look at those fractures and that friction and
those challenges so that we use them to reveal light,
which is why in our life in the first place.
(02:03):
Weekly Energy Boost is a seven day spiritual weather forecast
where we provide our listeners with the most practical and
powerful tools to navigate the coming seven days. We do
that by gleaning through the wisdom of Kabbalah and extracting
the wisdom, tools, practical examples, and experiences to help our
listeners not only take advantage of the gifts of this week,
(02:23):
but to be able to use that wisdom and that
knowledge anytime of their lives. And so this in particular
is one great opportunity. Again, we may have covered this
topic before, but because it's so specific and unique, I
couldn't help but bring it back out and hopefully help
(02:44):
our listeners to create breakthroughs and miracles in everyone's life.
So usually Aton starts with giving us the backdrop from
the Torah and the Zohar. I'm going to do that
this week, and then we'll get into our conversation. Basically,
the story this week is a relatively famous one. We're
continuing the Joseph in the what is it Joseph in
(03:09):
the Technicolor dreamt The story and our focus really is right.
This is where Joseph who is you know, the story
opens up. He's seventeen at the time. He's a typical teenager.
He's vain, he's young. His brothers are much older than him,
and he kind of comes to them and says, listen, guys,
(03:30):
I had a dream. And basically he had two dreams
in which the symbolism dictates that at some point they're
going to bow down to him, they're going to need him.
He's really going to be the boss. And they were
very troubled bothered by Joseph. Again, this is a story.
(03:52):
On one hand, these are tremendously elevated souls and we're
hearing this very kind of Real Housewives drama. You know.
The midrush gives us a lot of clues into what's
really happening.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
He was very vain, he was.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Beautiful, also very good looking. And we know from the
teachings of the Zohar and Kabbala that Joseph represents the
He is the chariot, He's the Merkavafer. Ysoud Yesod is
a keyword for the energy of being a channel, the
energy really in the tree of life, Ysouda represents the
(04:29):
funnel through which all of the light of the Creator
flows through to penetrate to our world. And in the story,
the other brothers were so full of love and unity
and togetherness, and then Joseph was like a thorn in
their side. Now through the Zohar, we understand that all
(04:49):
of the love and the unity and the closeness that
they had was because of Joseph. They didn't know that
at the time, and he he was trying to awaken
them to that. Like listen, I'm a piece of the
puzzle too, I'm a necessary part of the recipe for
the greatness their greatness. Now, what's interesting is that they
(05:15):
were not open to receive from him. They plotted to
kill him. One of the brothers decided, you know what,
our father would never forgive us. Let's just get rid
of him. Let's fake his death and sell him, and
they did a whole bunch of things. They threw him
in a pit. He ended up getting sold into slavery.
And there's another You know, lots of scenes in this
(05:37):
movie where Joseph could also become a victim, blame them,
become resentful, and he really took it. He really saw
how every moment of this story is from the Creator,
even the idea that his brothers would hate him. The
Creator put that idea in their head.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
It needed to happen that way.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
And he reveals that in a couple of weeks that
he knew it had nothing to do with them, that
it was all from the Creator. But what's really important
for us to understand from this story, and therefore to
get from the energy of this week, is that in general,
all the blessings, all of the light and the goodness
that we have, flow through that emanation that Spherra coliasoud.
(06:20):
At the same time, each one of us is given
people and situations in our lives whereby we can access
greater blessings, continued blessings. And those people are not our teachers,
the people we admire, the people that we love, the
people that we feel aligned with, the Josephs in our
(06:41):
lives are the difficult people in situations that we want
to end, that we want to eliminate, that we want
to extract or cut out.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
And so.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
When we do that, This is the teaching from the
Zohar this week, but I think it opens us up
to a really powerful realization about the way that we
look at the difficult people in situations in our lives
is that when we cut ourselves off from those people
in situations, we're cutting ourselves off from blessings, from goodness,
(07:17):
from connection. And what ends up happening is that in
order to reconnect to that energy of ysaud, if we
reject a situation, I'm not dealing with that. Not my monkeys,
not my circus. You know, there's so many different ways
that we can push an opportunity or a relationship out
(07:38):
of our lives. We're basically asking the universe to break us.
And that's what happened in the story with Joseph's brothers.
They in the seventeen years until they met him again,
they were desolate, they were destitute, they were lost like broken,
and then finally they got to reconnect with their Ysoude,
(07:59):
with their aut of blessings when they reconcile with Joseph.
And we'll talk about that and that reconciliation in a
few weeks, but it's really for us to see our
lives through that story. It's not about a story that
happened thousands of years ago. It's happening in our lives
all the time for us. And that's really the work
(08:20):
of this week is to find the Joseph's in our life,
to find the people in the situations that we are
rejecting or by the way that we treat them, we're
telling the creator this is a mistake. This doesn't belong here.
I didn't order this, this is not in my plan.
Because when we do that, when we reject those situations,
we're inviting the universe to break us down to be
(08:44):
open to reconnect. And it might not necessarily be through
that person. We might end up connecting through another way,
but by rejecting that invitation to allow our blessings to
be extracted from that difficult situation. And again, that doesn't
mean that the person who is difficult is going to
give us blessings.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
The opposite.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
It brocess. It's the circuitry and that relationship that unlocks
blessings for us. So that's I think the starting point
for our conversation that really, if we're open to it
this week, we will have clarity and epiphanies. We will
see the divineest design between or the divine design in
(09:30):
the midst of what appears chaotic, painful and challenging. And
you know, Rachel, you and I spoke a few weeks
ago about the it's almost like a wave of a
trend of not dealing. You know, as a society, we're
giving ourselves permission to not deal with things. And how
(09:56):
on a spiritual level, as we're learning this week from
the Zohar, we're literally cutting ourselves off from blessings when
we don't deal. So what would you say, you know,
if someone comes to you and says, I have this,
you know, challenging relationship with a parent, dis sibling, a child,
(10:18):
how can we look at that as a spiritual assignment?
Where is the light in the difficult situation?
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Well, there's usually like a process to first get grounded
and to make sure that that person who's having that
difficulty in that relationship feels hurt and validated. And I
don't just like run right into the spiritual lesson because
it's kind of truncates the contrunctate the process for that person.
But ultimately, what I'm seeing a lot of are parents
(10:49):
reaching out to me when their children have cut them
off either low or no contact. And so let's just
say I'm working with the parent, and I have influence
with that particular parent. The first thing that I will
help them with is to try to help them see
that this is a chance for them to use this
for their own growth, and they need to get ground
(11:11):
at first within themselves and and stop judging the situation
for what it is. But it's so incredibly painful that
so those emotions need to be honored, and then we
move into really looking at like what is this making
me look at in myself or look at and how
I'm living my life, and move the focus away from
(11:32):
just I've got to get back with that with my child,
I've got to fix this, or slowing down to speed
up kind of thing, and really starting to focus on
one's personal and spiritual growth. And then from there that
starts to create a shift on a physical like in
their in their way of they start feeling more grounded
(11:54):
and happy, even in a difficult situation, but they also
start to see things happen and that are really miraculous.
Things start to open and shift, and it's engaging in
a process. It's not something that is quick when you're
having these difficult relationships, and when I meet with the child,
an adult child, let's say, who's having trouble with their parents,
(12:16):
it's also tricky because you have to honor what they're
feeling and what it's been like and what imprint has
been left on them from what's going on in this relationship,
but ultimately continuing to try to introduce the idea that
the Creator is right here with you in this too,
and this is exactly where you need to be for
something that's going to help you reveal your unique potential,
(12:37):
your unique healing, your unique gift to the world, and
starting to plant those seeds of like, what is this
bringing to your attention for yourself and your lineage, really
your whole soul family to be transforming.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
What patterns have you noticed in working with individuals, whether
they're the rejector or the rejectee that seem to be
behind the conflict or the blockage.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
I think it's a co created dynamic. I think things
are changing in society that are in some ways empowering
young adults to decide how they want intimacy to look
in their lives and how they want the culture of
their family to look. And so there's more pushback, and
I think that's healthy in certain ways, and I think
(13:35):
there's also a misunderstanding about how important those connections are
on some level, even if they're difficult. I think that's
why I'm so happy to be talking about this from
a spiritual perspective.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
But I think some of the things that.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
The adult children are reporting that are themes that makes
them want to pull away are feeling criticized too many
opinions for how they should be living their life, and
those are taken as opinions are taken as criticism. So
that kind of over involvement is one of the biggest ones.
(14:11):
And you know, it ranges from if not accepting the
path that they're taking and giving them space, or they
may be introducing somebody new into the family that that
that the parents don't approve of and that becomes a
big conflict. So those are just a couple that could
be political issues or different views spiritual path differences. But
(14:37):
I would say the predominant one. And there are also
some sibling jealousy that which is relevant for this portion.
You know too, are in some ways that can be
viewed as that where let's say there's a wedding and
one sibling doesn't has an issue with their brother and
doesn't want them in the wedding, and then the parent
(14:57):
steps in and says, you.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Can't do that, you have to have that person in
the wedding.
Speaker 3 (15:01):
Well then they feel like, oh, you've just like my
whole childhood, you've favored him anyway, and you've never protected
me from his behavior. And then you've got this new
fiancee or you know, engaged person who's getting married that's
seeing your family from a different perspective. It's like, no,
that's not right. So that's where the stepping in and
(15:22):
over involvement can interact. Also with some childhood issues that
has never really been addressed for that person that can
can bubble to the surface with things like weddings or
children having children, or lots of those big milestones.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
I'm going to throw in a concept that we've brought
up in the past that I think is important to
highlight here before we take it deeper, because I have
other questions I want to ask you. I think one
of the most profound concepts, most liberating concepts that we
get from studying Kabbala is the fact that, well, you
can't control what happens around you, it is in your
(16:01):
control to decide how it affects you. And yeah, okay,
it's easy for me to say I have a podcast
and behind a mic, I get to help lots of people.
But even in my own experience, right, you know, I'm
sure that whoever's listening can say, well, you don't have
my mother, or you don't have my brother or whatever
it is. We've all experienced situations that we didn't order right.
(16:29):
That's why I ordered a hamburger. You brought me passa.
I don't want pasta, right. I want a harmonious relationship.
I want someone who's going to agree with me. I
want to feel totally loved and accepted. And I had
a conversation with a student and I know she's listening,
and I'm so excited for her to hear that hear this.
And she was telling me that she she put up
(16:51):
a boundary with her a parent and the boundary was
no contact. And we were talking about how there may
be physical boundary, but internally there is no boundary. Still,
ye see, is that there is a degree of influence
that he still has over her even though she's not
(17:12):
allowing him to be physically in her life. And we
were talking about how and now a similar dynamic is
appearing in another relationship, which is really what the Czaara
is telling us that if you push away the opportunity
that the universe is giving you, that opportunity will come
at you again from somewhere else. So one, while you
(17:37):
can't control the people in situations in your life, you
can control how they affect you. That doesn't mean you
pretend nothing bothers you, or that you suppress your feelings.
You can feel how you feel and decide how it
changes you or doesn't, how it makes you, how you
make decisions because of it or despite it, that's up
(17:58):
to you. The second thing that you said that I
think is really phenomenal and also bearing in mind we
talk about this probably once a quarter, right our soul
chooses our families. We decide these are the best parents
for my soul's process, not for my comfort, not for
(18:19):
my ease, and for my peace of mind. These are
the people who are going to help me reach my
highest potential. And a diamond doesn't you know, grow on
a fruit tree. It comes from pressure. The carbon is
highly pressurized and becomes a diamond. A snowflake becomes a
(18:41):
snowflake in extreme cold, not on the tropical beach. So
I know that you have a lot of experience in
helping people shift their perspectives and their relationship with their relationships.
How can we help our listeners pivot the way that
they look at those and challenging almost impossible relationships.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So it's the first step always is is trying to
help kind of calm and slow down and be with
what's happening and embrace what's happening.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
And I think that.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Again it's important for people to be validated for how
hard it is for them, but through the process of
really leaning into and trusting that whatever is bringing up,
whatever it's bringing up and you in this relationship is
your like fitness course for becoming who you're capable of becoming.
So when you were saying, like you decide how you
(19:42):
can respond or how but it's also like who you
want to become through it. And I just know my
own life I've had a challenging relationship with my oldest brother.
You know, I don't think I'll listen to this, but
if he does, I'm not going to say anything disparaging
about him. I love him dearly. But I just know
that every single stair step of my life of trying
(20:05):
to go to the next level has often been a company.
If it's not him, it's somebody like him that is
showing me where I either don't believe in myself or
where I am handing over assigning something that he's supposed
to be for me or someone else is supposed to
be for me, that is really something that is selfish
for me. It's something that I am assigning somebody else
(20:26):
that isn't what they agreed to. And I've had a
belief system that this is what I need and they're
bad for not providing that. And so it's emancipated me
at every stage to see. I know what it's taught me,
for example, is to see people as a human being
that is just a tool for what I want them
to be for me. And so I think that what
(20:48):
I like to ask people is for them to when
the time is right.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
It's timing is such a nuance.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Because it, but when the time is right to ask them,
what is it that they have already noticed that have
been the gifts or the blessings in this challenge? And
what are the themes that you notice keep coming up
with this particular family member, but not only with that
family member, but that you.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Know are yours.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
And then it helps to shift the focus from the
external to the internal, from the horizontal to the vertical
of like it's between myself and my soul and that
is that's when it becomes so empowering. It's not easy
to do, especially when something is triggered and you just
had an incident and you feel, you know, like traumatized
over it. But ultimately, the more you can shift your
(21:34):
perspective and see that this is really happening, you know,
for me from the Kabbalah one basic idea versus to
me and really getting support around you for helping to
see how that this is part of a loving part
of your journey and not a punishment and not something
to reject.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Yeah, I think you hit the nail on the head.
I think a lot of the suffering that we go
through with our difficult relationships is because we're in our
minds thinking about how it should be or what shouldn't be,
which automatically means we're not in the moment in the
(22:14):
experience where we become the narrator or the judge and
the jury. And I had a personal aha moment when
I realized that as I'm in my head thinking what
should be or shouldn't be, what they should have done
or shouldn't have done, what they should have said or
shouldn't have said, how I should be treated or shouldn't
be treated, I'm the one in a state of disconnect,
(22:38):
like I'm punishing myself with those thoughts. So when you
brought up that, you use the phrase like it's the
vertical right, it's an opportunity for me to deepen my
connection to my soul and the source of the light itself.
You realize what am I doing? Like you know, sometimes
it's very hard, I will admit, especially if in the
(23:02):
situation where you're the parent and you feel your child
should or shouldn't fill in the blank, you could easily
lose sleep, right, be super stressed, unregulated about what they're
doing or not doing, or what path they're on or
not on. It really helps to isolate that thought that
(23:25):
is bringing the unrest and the fear and the stress
and recognizing meaning it's not healthy for me. It's not
helping the other person for sure, But what is the
collateral damage on my well being, my mental state, my
happiness when I stay stuck in what should or shouldn't
(23:46):
And for me, that was a big aha moment, Like
you were saying, you take the focus off the other
person and bring it to yourself. But sometimes it's not
like we're talking about. I think something that can be
very you know, if it's not relatable, it's not relatable.
We do this in smaller ways and forms all the time.
Yasoda is not only or your personal Yosef is not
(24:09):
only a difficult family member. It can also be people
that we can't accept, situations that we don't accept, things
in our lives that we don't want to embrace, or
if we see a situation or a person that's lacking
or at fault. The universe is encouraging us this week
(24:31):
to open ourselves to receive from those people in those situations.
It's easy to receive from someone you love and admire
and respect, we also want to receive, right, That's the
I think that the high level challenge that we create
for ourselves is to the degree that we blame people
(24:53):
for our unhappiness, our distress, our whatever, or we you know,
we assign blame too. To that degree we cut ourselves
off from the Creator because we're saying, this is a mistake,
this is not supposed to be here. I don't accept this.
I reject it. And it's so funny to even think, right,
(25:15):
how much needs to take place in order to orchestrate
a family or a work situation, or you know, it's
like the greatest production, the greatest Hollywood production in the world,
is each one of our lives. And we stand there
and we say, this is wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
This is a mistake. I don't accept it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
What we're really doing is we're saying the Creator is wrong.
The Creator made a mistake. I don't accept it. So
that I think is the shift is not only to look.
You may not have a person in your life that
you wish wasn't there, but for sure every single one
of us has people that we don't accept, that we criticize,
that we fault, that we blame, that we might even
(25:56):
in a way withhold from punish, you know, oh, taunt
justifiably so they deserve it. And I'm going to bring
in something totally separate, and I want to stop talking.
But I was watching a music video the other day,
children's by the way, you know, I won't even say
(26:17):
it was a children's music video, and the amount of
comments dehumanizing, criticizing, I mean, I was like, God, I
hope this performer does not read the comments. This is horrible.
I set out to put out this beautiful, uplifting friend.
(26:39):
I mean, it was just such a pleasure to listen
to and to watch and people, strangers just cutting them
down for what. And I had a thought of how
it's connected, because it's basically saying there's no light here,
there's no light in you, the light overlooked, you, missed you,
(26:59):
forgot you, and in any way, shape or form that
we have that perception. This is the week to dismantle that.
How can we help our listeners. Maybe they are aware
that they have a Joseph in their lives that they
could be shifting you.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Sorry, most people do have one, I would.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Say everyone does. Some are more intense than others, some
are more dramatic than others. What are some steps we
can take just energetically to shift to move toward an
embrace and an acceptance versus a rejection and a cutting out.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
The first one is always to move the focus away
from the power you give to that person and bring
your energy back into yourself.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Whatever helps you do that.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
It can be making sure you're doing all the things
that you know make you feel grounded and inspired, or
or I just I use a visual I'm very visual,
So I literally visualize moving into a space in my
home where I know I can be myself and I
feel fully me, and then I can hear myself versus
being like ruminating and spinning out on somebody else. And
(28:22):
then secondly, I think it's really important to even if
it's even if you're having a hard time imagining that
this could be for your benefit, to really put in
the effort and lean into especially making sure you're studying
wisdom that reminds you of this, because it will fly
(28:42):
away in these moments and really bring yourself to trusting
and deepening into how this is here to help me
grow and become more of who I can become.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
It could be that you're here to.
Speaker 3 (28:54):
Become more unconditionally loving or learn to trust yourself more.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
I know for me.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
My work is always to become more emotionally independent and
not care so much about what others think of me,
and really follow my calling and listen to my truth
and share from my soul, not related to what anybody's
gonna think or say. It is. It is an addiction.
It is so hard to break. So I usually that's
usually my go to when I'm having some problems in
(29:20):
a relationship. It's like it helps me build that muscle
of turning within and turning to the creator and just
keeping you know, like looking for your lesson.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
And I do I do find that that.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
I would just encourage people of any age because a
lot of times parents I notice aren't realizing how much
they're still our being awakened and invited to learn and
grow as parents of adult children.
Speaker 2 (29:49):
And I'm amazed at.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
And inspired by how much growth for many not everyone's
open to that, how much growth they find and and
themselves by the challenge of being strained or stranged in
some way. And so just to always be reminded that
as long as we're breathing, we can taste that gift
of transformation, and we're being loved when we're challenged.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I would love if we could spend the final minutes
of our conversation talking to those people who might be
on the receiving end of the rejection. Right, we spoke
mostly to how are we rejecting? And again, it might
not be a relationship, It might be a situation, a
(30:38):
dynamic that you are just like, I'm not dealing with this, right,
Anything that we're not willing to deal with has the same,
you know, it's part of this conversation. What if there
are people listening out there who are the ones that
have been rejected or being I'm not going to say marginalize,
(31:00):
because they don't think it's it's thematic. It's a personal issue.
If you feel you're being rejected, boxed in, labeled, falsely
designated as the perpetrator or the problem. What what kind
of consciousness can we embrace this week to shift that
(31:21):
relationship from our end, even though it might seem we
don't have any power ability in the physical sense to
ineffalence the relationship or the situation.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
Well, it's honestly, it's the same.
Speaker 3 (31:33):
Like it's it's that is your challenge then right now,
and it's and so it would be to do your
best to embrace what's happening, because so much of it
when when rejected, it feels so unfair. And so I
would also really move away from it's not going to
be fair, and to not get into much of the logic.
And if you want to repair the relationship, you especially
(31:55):
need to let go of unfair or fairness and and
and and I typically people need.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Support for this.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
It's hard to do by yourself, whether it's your your teacher,
a counselor, or a specialist of some kind that you trust.
But then I would also then see, what where is
this showing me something that I haven't been willing to
look at in myself. And most I'm telling you about
with these parents if I'm assuming it's a parent, and
but it could be a sibling.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Or a it could be an ex, Yeah exactly that
you want to be amicable and your ex is like.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Yeah, yes.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
But regardless, the theme it's that the wisdom doesn't change
in any circumstance. It's a it's an ironclad truth that
is still here to help you to go to whatever
your more fulfilled level will be. Or that feeling that
you are becoming growing is just feels so good. It's hard,
(32:54):
but it feels so good, so and so I would
look for that, look for where it's and then it's
in ways that you may not have expected it. We
are often so it's so concealed to us, we can't
often see how we are affecting someone or what may have.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Caused the rejection.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
So I would encourage becoming curious as well. And even
if you think that the other person is imbalanced or
they're mentally ill, or they'll still have some value to
offer you of something that you have probably done or
said that didn't work for them, and it's good to
learn it. And so that's where some of the main
(33:30):
focus that I do when I do writing or sharing
and with clients or teaching or anything is really trying
to help learn teach people how to listen. It is
so hard, but listening without trying to influence, just truly
trying to put yourself and have empathy and see what
the other person's experience is. And we think we're better
(33:53):
at it than we are. We just are fundamentally not
very good at it. But it's a skill worth building,
is to us and to understand.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Yeah, I think what what you shared sounds like something
that we've shared before. But probably not in the last
year or two on weekly energy boost. It's that when
there's when presented with any challenge, the first question the
Cabalysts teach us to ask ourselves is why is this
(34:22):
in my movie right? How can I grow from it?
What can I learn from it? Focusing first on not
what the other person did or said or didn't again,
taking out the should from the conversation, and really reflecting on,
like you were saying, being curious, trying to see in
a macro sense, how this could be for my highest good,
(34:46):
and then only then checking looking being curious about is
there anything I can do right now? Most people jump
into the do before the reflection process, and so when
you said before right listening to listen, not to respond,
not to influence, you might not even have the ability
(35:08):
to have an interaction right now, but initiating that process
of the creator decided this is the perfect thing for me.
My soul decided this is the perfect thing for me.
I want to know what it is, what am I
meant to get from this? And that's you know, it's
I imagine that what we're doing when we ask those
questions is we're taking the situation in for a big
(35:30):
hug rather than rejecting it. And so I feel like
also when you said put aside the fairness piece. I
find usually when people say that's not fair, what they're
really saying is I don't like it, and there's some
sort of vindication you feel when you say, well, that's
(35:51):
not fair, right, But the truth is it is fair.
You just don't like it, and it's okay not to
like it. We're not talking in this week episode about
love everything that happens unconditionally. We're talking about the open,
being open to receive something from everyone and everything, regardless
of how difficult or lacking or problematic it might be.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
Yes, there's something that I would love to add that's
been on my mind with so many of the things
that you're saying, and that is that so much of
the work is internal. And yes, you can repair externally,
but I've just seen the quantum miraculous shifts that happen.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Which is what I've.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Learned from studying Cabala and love about it so much,
is that when we change, that's when things change in
our life, and so there's lots of ways to remove cutoffs.
It can be internal as well, like even if you
find that you need space from someone, it's important to
also do the work so that you're not internally regarding
them as not filled with light or still.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
A lot of the work is what.
Speaker 3 (36:55):
You do internal and you can even if you're not
connected to this person, when you are doing your personal
growth work and you're getting your lessons, you should notice
that some of the resentment or some of the anger
and the hurt and the rejection does start to minimize
because you're starting to connect with your your source about it.
(37:17):
And as you get your lesson, it starts to help
you shift that like from that external locus of control
more to that internal And so if you're if you're
not connected now just I just want to inspire and
give hope that your internal work. You don't know when
or how, but it makes a huge difference.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Look, it's the catalyst. You're in a world is actually
what attracts the external situation. So when the inner world shifts,
the outer world has to follow suit. Beautiful, I'm so
excited for people to take this in, sit with it
and make it work for them, each each person in
(37:58):
their own individual way, on their own level. You know,
you may feel that you need to take space from
a person, which is not the same as cutting them
out right. You can say I need I need a
couple of weeks to think about it. I'll get back
to you, or I'll let you know when I'm ready
to have that conversation. Right. Where's that's I want to say,
(38:19):
reasonable and healthy thing to do. If you need to
gather your thoughts or you're feeling you can't handle a
conversation in the moment, there's nothing wrong with rescheduling it,
but completely removing it from the calendar is essentially the
mistake that many of us make, and in removing it
(38:40):
from the list of possibilities, we're actually removing our connection
to blessings. And that I want to go back to
that first idea because the goal is that we welcome
and allow the universe to give us all that we
the infinite and limitless blessings that we can receive. We
want to get out of the way, and this is
(39:01):
one of the ways that the cabitalists teach we get
in our own way. We block the blessings because they're
meant to come through the difficult and challenging situations. Rachel,
thank you so much for appreciating this conversation. Yes, I'm
sure it's going to help countless people, and I know
every at the end of every episode, I say that
(39:23):
the most powerful thing you can do is share the episode.
Perhaps you know this episode can be especially helpful for
people who might not even be on the path of Kabbala,
on a spiritual path, but are suffering because of a
particular situation or relationship, and this might be the door
(39:45):
that opens them to resolution from a different perspective. Weekly
Energy Boost is available on all podcast platforms, YouTube, Facebook,
and Instagram. You can follow us on those platforms to
receive need more content to support you in living what
we share in every episode. You can also go to
our website weeklyenergyboost dot com, where you can learn more
(40:07):
about the things we think are important for our listeners
to know about, search through our archives, send us a message,
and click the donate button to help make Weekly Energy
Boost possible. Rachel again, these last forty minutes were priceless,
and I'm so excited for the world to connect with
you and your wisdom and your insight.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
And I hope we can do it again
Speaker 1 (40:32):
And we'll see you next week on the Weekly Energy
Boost
Good morning everyone, good evening, good afternoon wherever you are,
and welcome to this week's weekly energy boost. My name
is Elisheva, and today I have the honor and privilege
of sharing the mic with a longtime friend, student, and
just all around beautiful soul who also happens to be
(00:36):
a counselor for the soul. I would say, a professional
in the field of mental health and therapy who brings
the wisdom of Kabbala into her practice. And Rachel, thank
you for being here with me this morning. You were
with us. We were talking about it in COVID during
in twenty twenty, I think it was, and we were
talking about fear. If I'm not mistaken, anxiety and fear. Yeah,
(01:00):
to have you back, and we are discussing I think
one of the most profound and powerful topics. It's funny
because we touched on it in the summer in an
episode with danieln Orr, which I can also refer everyone
to later in the episode if they need.
Speaker 2 (01:20):
Some clarity.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
But today's topic is healing the fractures in our soul family.
And we've gotten so many questions over the years about friction,
conflict repair, how to deal with difficult parents, children, siblings, partners, spouse,
you know, the whole thing. And I'm always so excited
(01:41):
when the energy of the week supports us to do
deep healing work, or at least to bring those fractures
to our awareness. And today's episode is all about shifting
how we look at those fractures and that friction and
those challenges so that we use them to reveal light,
which is why in our life in the first place.
(02:03):
Weekly Energy Boost is a seven day spiritual weather forecast
where we provide our listeners with the most practical and
powerful tools to navigate the coming seven days. We do
that by gleaning through the wisdom of Kabbalah and extracting
the wisdom, tools, practical examples, and experiences to help our
listeners not only take advantage of the gifts of this week,
(02:23):
but to be able to use that wisdom and that
knowledge anytime of their lives. And so this in particular
is one great opportunity. Again, we may have covered this
topic before, but because it's so specific and unique, I
couldn't help but bring it back out and hopefully help
(02:44):
our listeners to create breakthroughs and miracles in everyone's life.
So usually Aton starts with giving us the backdrop from
the Torah and the Zohar. I'm going to do that
this week, and then we'll get into our conversation. Basically,
the story this week is a relatively famous one. We're
continuing the Joseph in the what is it Joseph in
(03:09):
the Technicolor dreamt The story and our focus really is right.
This is where Joseph who is you know, the story
opens up. He's seventeen at the time. He's a typical teenager.
He's vain, he's young. His brothers are much older than him,
and he kind of comes to them and says, listen, guys,
(03:30):
I had a dream. And basically he had two dreams
in which the symbolism dictates that at some point they're
going to bow down to him, they're going to need him.
He's really going to be the boss. And they were
very troubled bothered by Joseph. Again, this is a story.
(03:52):
On one hand, these are tremendously elevated souls and we're
hearing this very kind of Real Housewives drama. You know.
The midrush gives us a lot of clues into what's
really happening.
Speaker 2 (04:05):
He was very vain, he was.
Speaker 1 (04:07):
Beautiful, also very good looking. And we know from the
teachings of the Zohar and Kabbala that Joseph represents the
He is the chariot, He's the Merkavafer. Ysoud Yesod is
a keyword for the energy of being a channel, the
energy really in the tree of life, Ysouda represents the
(04:29):
funnel through which all of the light of the Creator
flows through to penetrate to our world. And in the story,
the other brothers were so full of love and unity
and togetherness, and then Joseph was like a thorn in
their side. Now through the Zohar, we understand that all
(04:49):
of the love and the unity and the closeness that
they had was because of Joseph. They didn't know that
at the time, and he he was trying to awaken
them to that. Like listen, I'm a piece of the
puzzle too, I'm a necessary part of the recipe for
the greatness their greatness. Now, what's interesting is that they
(05:15):
were not open to receive from him. They plotted to
kill him. One of the brothers decided, you know what,
our father would never forgive us. Let's just get rid
of him. Let's fake his death and sell him, and
they did a whole bunch of things. They threw him
in a pit. He ended up getting sold into slavery.
And there's another You know, lots of scenes in this
(05:37):
movie where Joseph could also become a victim, blame them,
become resentful, and he really took it. He really saw
how every moment of this story is from the Creator,
even the idea that his brothers would hate him. The
Creator put that idea in their head.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
It needed to happen that way.
Speaker 1 (05:56):
And he reveals that in a couple of weeks that
he knew it had nothing to do with them, that
it was all from the Creator. But what's really important
for us to understand from this story, and therefore to
get from the energy of this week, is that in general,
all the blessings, all of the light and the goodness
that we have, flow through that emanation that Spherra coliasoud.
(06:20):
At the same time, each one of us is given
people and situations in our lives whereby we can access
greater blessings, continued blessings. And those people are not our teachers,
the people we admire, the people that we love, the
people that we feel aligned with, the Josephs in our
(06:41):
lives are the difficult people in situations that we want
to end, that we want to eliminate, that we want
to extract or cut out.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
And so.
Speaker 1 (06:52):
When we do that, This is the teaching from the
Zohar this week, but I think it opens us up
to a really powerful realization about the way that we
look at the difficult people in situations in our lives
is that when we cut ourselves off from those people
in situations, we're cutting ourselves off from blessings, from goodness,
(07:17):
from connection. And what ends up happening is that in
order to reconnect to that energy of ysaud, if we
reject a situation, I'm not dealing with that. Not my monkeys,
not my circus. You know, there's so many different ways
that we can push an opportunity or a relationship out
(07:38):
of our lives. We're basically asking the universe to break us.
And that's what happened in the story with Joseph's brothers.
They in the seventeen years until they met him again,
they were desolate, they were destitute, they were lost like broken,
and then finally they got to reconnect with their Ysoude,
(07:59):
with their aut of blessings when they reconcile with Joseph.
And we'll talk about that and that reconciliation in a
few weeks, but it's really for us to see our
lives through that story. It's not about a story that
happened thousands of years ago. It's happening in our lives
all the time for us. And that's really the work
(08:20):
of this week is to find the Joseph's in our life,
to find the people in the situations that we are
rejecting or by the way that we treat them, we're
telling the creator this is a mistake. This doesn't belong here.
I didn't order this, this is not in my plan.
Because when we do that, when we reject those situations,
we're inviting the universe to break us down to be
(08:44):
open to reconnect. And it might not necessarily be through
that person. We might end up connecting through another way,
but by rejecting that invitation to allow our blessings to
be extracted from that difficult situation. And again, that doesn't
mean that the person who is difficult is going to
give us blessings.
Speaker 2 (09:03):
The opposite.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
It brocess. It's the circuitry and that relationship that unlocks
blessings for us. So that's I think the starting point
for our conversation that really, if we're open to it
this week, we will have clarity and epiphanies. We will
see the divineest design between or the divine design in
(09:30):
the midst of what appears chaotic, painful and challenging. And
you know, Rachel, you and I spoke a few weeks
ago about the it's almost like a wave of a
trend of not dealing. You know, as a society, we're
giving ourselves permission to not deal with things. And how
(09:56):
on a spiritual level, as we're learning this week from
the Zohar, we're literally cutting ourselves off from blessings when
we don't deal. So what would you say, you know,
if someone comes to you and says, I have this,
you know, challenging relationship with a parent, dis sibling, a child,
(10:18):
how can we look at that as a spiritual assignment?
Where is the light in the difficult situation?
Speaker 3 (10:27):
Well, there's usually like a process to first get grounded
and to make sure that that person who's having that
difficulty in that relationship feels hurt and validated. And I
don't just like run right into the spiritual lesson because
it's kind of truncates the contrunctate the process for that person.
But ultimately, what I'm seeing a lot of are parents
(10:49):
reaching out to me when their children have cut them
off either low or no contact. And so let's just
say I'm working with the parent, and I have influence
with that particular parent. The first thing that I will
help them with is to try to help them see
that this is a chance for them to use this
for their own growth, and they need to get ground
(11:11):
at first within themselves and and stop judging the situation
for what it is. But it's so incredibly painful that
so those emotions need to be honored, and then we
move into really looking at like what is this making
me look at in myself or look at and how
I'm living my life, and move the focus away from
(11:32):
just I've got to get back with that with my child,
I've got to fix this, or slowing down to speed
up kind of thing, and really starting to focus on
one's personal and spiritual growth. And then from there that
starts to create a shift on a physical like in
their in their way of they start feeling more grounded
(11:54):
and happy, even in a difficult situation, but they also
start to see things happen and that are really miraculous.
Things start to open and shift, and it's engaging in
a process. It's not something that is quick when you're
having these difficult relationships, and when I meet with the child,
an adult child, let's say, who's having trouble with their parents,
(12:16):
it's also tricky because you have to honor what they're
feeling and what it's been like and what imprint has
been left on them from what's going on in this relationship,
but ultimately continuing to try to introduce the idea that
the Creator is right here with you in this too,
and this is exactly where you need to be for
something that's going to help you reveal your unique potential,
(12:37):
your unique healing, your unique gift to the world, and
starting to plant those seeds of like, what is this
bringing to your attention for yourself and your lineage, really
your whole soul family to be transforming.
Speaker 1 (12:53):
What patterns have you noticed in working with individuals, whether
they're the rejector or the rejectee that seem to be
behind the conflict or the blockage.
Speaker 3 (13:13):
I think it's a co created dynamic. I think things
are changing in society that are in some ways empowering
young adults to decide how they want intimacy to look
in their lives and how they want the culture of
their family to look. And so there's more pushback, and
I think that's healthy in certain ways, and I think
(13:35):
there's also a misunderstanding about how important those connections are
on some level, even if they're difficult. I think that's
why I'm so happy to be talking about this from
a spiritual perspective.
Speaker 2 (13:46):
But I think some of the things that.
Speaker 3 (13:48):
The adult children are reporting that are themes that makes
them want to pull away are feeling criticized too many
opinions for how they should be living their life, and
those are taken as opinions are taken as criticism. So
that kind of over involvement is one of the biggest ones.
(14:11):
And you know, it ranges from if not accepting the
path that they're taking and giving them space, or they
may be introducing somebody new into the family that that
that the parents don't approve of and that becomes a
big conflict. So those are just a couple that could
be political issues or different views spiritual path differences. But
(14:37):
I would say the predominant one. And there are also
some sibling jealousy that which is relevant for this portion.
You know too, are in some ways that can be
viewed as that where let's say there's a wedding and
one sibling doesn't has an issue with their brother and
doesn't want them in the wedding, and then the parent
(14:57):
steps in and says, you.
Speaker 2 (14:58):
Can't do that, you have to have that person in
the wedding.
Speaker 3 (15:01):
Well then they feel like, oh, you've just like my
whole childhood, you've favored him anyway, and you've never protected
me from his behavior. And then you've got this new
fiancee or you know, engaged person who's getting married that's
seeing your family from a different perspective. It's like, no,
that's not right. So that's where the stepping in and
(15:22):
over involvement can interact. Also with some childhood issues that
has never really been addressed for that person that can
can bubble to the surface with things like weddings or
children having children, or lots of those big milestones.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
I'm going to throw in a concept that we've brought
up in the past that I think is important to
highlight here before we take it deeper, because I have
other questions I want to ask you. I think one
of the most profound concepts, most liberating concepts that we
get from studying Kabbala is the fact that, well, you
can't control what happens around you, it is in your
(16:01):
control to decide how it affects you. And yeah, okay,
it's easy for me to say I have a podcast
and behind a mic, I get to help lots of people.
But even in my own experience, right, you know, I'm
sure that whoever's listening can say, well, you don't have
my mother, or you don't have my brother or whatever
it is. We've all experienced situations that we didn't order right.
(16:29):
That's why I ordered a hamburger. You brought me passa.
I don't want pasta, right. I want a harmonious relationship.
I want someone who's going to agree with me. I
want to feel totally loved and accepted. And I had
a conversation with a student and I know she's listening,
and I'm so excited for her to hear that hear this.
And she was telling me that she she put up
(16:51):
a boundary with her a parent and the boundary was
no contact. And we were talking about how there may
be physical boundary, but internally there is no boundary. Still,
ye see, is that there is a degree of influence
that he still has over her even though she's not
(17:12):
allowing him to be physically in her life. And we
were talking about how and now a similar dynamic is
appearing in another relationship, which is really what the Czaara
is telling us that if you push away the opportunity
that the universe is giving you, that opportunity will come
at you again from somewhere else. So one, while you
(17:37):
can't control the people in situations in your life, you
can control how they affect you. That doesn't mean you
pretend nothing bothers you, or that you suppress your feelings.
You can feel how you feel and decide how it
changes you or doesn't, how it makes you, how you
make decisions because of it or despite it, that's up
(17:58):
to you. The second thing that you said that I
think is really phenomenal and also bearing in mind we
talk about this probably once a quarter, right our soul
chooses our families. We decide these are the best parents
for my soul's process, not for my comfort, not for
(18:19):
my ease, and for my peace of mind. These are
the people who are going to help me reach my
highest potential. And a diamond doesn't you know, grow on
a fruit tree. It comes from pressure. The carbon is
highly pressurized and becomes a diamond. A snowflake becomes a
(18:41):
snowflake in extreme cold, not on the tropical beach. So
I know that you have a lot of experience in
helping people shift their perspectives and their relationship with their relationships.
How can we help our listeners pivot the way that
they look at those and challenging almost impossible relationships.
Speaker 3 (19:06):
So it's the first step always is is trying to
help kind of calm and slow down and be with
what's happening and embrace what's happening.
Speaker 2 (19:17):
And I think that.
Speaker 3 (19:20):
Again it's important for people to be validated for how
hard it is for them, but through the process of
really leaning into and trusting that whatever is bringing up,
whatever it's bringing up and you in this relationship is
your like fitness course for becoming who you're capable of becoming.
So when you were saying, like you decide how you
(19:42):
can respond or how but it's also like who you
want to become through it. And I just know my
own life I've had a challenging relationship with my oldest brother.
You know, I don't think I'll listen to this, but
if he does, I'm not going to say anything disparaging
about him. I love him dearly. But I just know
that every single stair step of my life of trying
(20:05):
to go to the next level has often been a company.
If it's not him, it's somebody like him that is
showing me where I either don't believe in myself or
where I am handing over assigning something that he's supposed
to be for me or someone else is supposed to
be for me, that is really something that is selfish
for me. It's something that I am assigning somebody else
(20:26):
that isn't what they agreed to. And I've had a
belief system that this is what I need and they're
bad for not providing that. And so it's emancipated me
at every stage to see. I know what it's taught me,
for example, is to see people as a human being
that is just a tool for what I want them
to be for me. And so I think that what
(20:48):
I like to ask people is for them to when
the time is right.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
It's timing is such a nuance.
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Because it, but when the time is right to ask them,
what is it that they have already noticed that have
been the gifts or the blessings in this challenge? And
what are the themes that you notice keep coming up
with this particular family member, but not only with that
family member, but that you.
Speaker 2 (21:11):
Know are yours.
Speaker 3 (21:13):
And then it helps to shift the focus from the
external to the internal, from the horizontal to the vertical
of like it's between myself and my soul and that
is that's when it becomes so empowering. It's not easy
to do, especially when something is triggered and you just
had an incident and you feel, you know, like traumatized
over it. But ultimately, the more you can shift your
(21:34):
perspective and see that this is really happening, you know,
for me from the Kabbalah one basic idea versus to
me and really getting support around you for helping to
see how that this is part of a loving part
of your journey and not a punishment and not something
to reject.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Yeah, I think you hit the nail on the head.
I think a lot of the suffering that we go
through with our difficult relationships is because we're in our
minds thinking about how it should be or what shouldn't be,
which automatically means we're not in the moment in the
(22:14):
experience where we become the narrator or the judge and
the jury. And I had a personal aha moment when
I realized that as I'm in my head thinking what
should be or shouldn't be, what they should have done
or shouldn't have done, what they should have said or
shouldn't have said, how I should be treated or shouldn't
be treated, I'm the one in a state of disconnect,
(22:38):
like I'm punishing myself with those thoughts. So when you
brought up that, you use the phrase like it's the
vertical right, it's an opportunity for me to deepen my
connection to my soul and the source of the light itself.
You realize what am I doing? Like you know, sometimes
it's very hard, I will admit, especially if in the
(23:02):
situation where you're the parent and you feel your child
should or shouldn't fill in the blank, you could easily
lose sleep, right, be super stressed, unregulated about what they're
doing or not doing, or what path they're on or
not on. It really helps to isolate that thought that
(23:25):
is bringing the unrest and the fear and the stress
and recognizing meaning it's not healthy for me. It's not
helping the other person for sure, But what is the
collateral damage on my well being, my mental state, my
happiness when I stay stuck in what should or shouldn't
(23:46):
And for me, that was a big aha moment, Like
you were saying, you take the focus off the other
person and bring it to yourself. But sometimes it's not
like we're talking about. I think something that can be
very you know, if it's not relatable, it's not relatable.
We do this in smaller ways and forms all the time.
Yasoda is not only or your personal Yosef is not
(24:09):
only a difficult family member. It can also be people
that we can't accept, situations that we don't accept, things
in our lives that we don't want to embrace, or
if we see a situation or a person that's lacking
or at fault. The universe is encouraging us this week
(24:31):
to open ourselves to receive from those people in those situations.
It's easy to receive from someone you love and admire
and respect, we also want to receive, right, That's the
I think that the high level challenge that we create
for ourselves is to the degree that we blame people
(24:53):
for our unhappiness, our distress, our whatever, or we you know,
we assign blame too. To that degree we cut ourselves
off from the Creator because we're saying, this is a mistake,
this is not supposed to be here. I don't accept this.
I reject it. And it's so funny to even think, right,
(25:15):
how much needs to take place in order to orchestrate
a family or a work situation, or you know, it's
like the greatest production, the greatest Hollywood production in the world,
is each one of our lives. And we stand there
and we say, this is wrong.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
This is a mistake. I don't accept it.
Speaker 1 (25:33):
What we're really doing is we're saying the Creator is wrong.
The Creator made a mistake. I don't accept it. So
that I think is the shift is not only to look.
You may not have a person in your life that
you wish wasn't there, but for sure every single one
of us has people that we don't accept, that we criticize,
that we fault, that we blame, that we might even
(25:56):
in a way withhold from punish, you know, oh, taunt
justifiably so they deserve it. And I'm going to bring
in something totally separate, and I want to stop talking.
But I was watching a music video the other day,
children's by the way, you know, I won't even say
(26:17):
it was a children's music video, and the amount of
comments dehumanizing, criticizing, I mean, I was like, God, I
hope this performer does not read the comments. This is horrible.
I set out to put out this beautiful, uplifting friend.
(26:39):
I mean, it was just such a pleasure to listen
to and to watch and people, strangers just cutting them
down for what. And I had a thought of how
it's connected, because it's basically saying there's no light here,
there's no light in you, the light overlooked, you, missed you,
(26:59):
forgot you, and in any way, shape or form that
we have that perception. This is the week to dismantle that.
How can we help our listeners. Maybe they are aware
that they have a Joseph in their lives that they
could be shifting you.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
Sorry, most people do have one, I would.
Speaker 1 (27:23):
Say everyone does. Some are more intense than others, some
are more dramatic than others. What are some steps we
can take just energetically to shift to move toward an
embrace and an acceptance versus a rejection and a cutting out.
Speaker 3 (27:46):
The first one is always to move the focus away
from the power you give to that person and bring
your energy back into yourself.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Whatever helps you do that.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
It can be making sure you're doing all the things
that you know make you feel grounded and inspired, or
or I just I use a visual I'm very visual,
So I literally visualize moving into a space in my
home where I know I can be myself and I
feel fully me, and then I can hear myself versus
being like ruminating and spinning out on somebody else. And
(28:22):
then secondly, I think it's really important to even if
it's even if you're having a hard time imagining that
this could be for your benefit, to really put in
the effort and lean into especially making sure you're studying
wisdom that reminds you of this, because it will fly
(28:42):
away in these moments and really bring yourself to trusting
and deepening into how this is here to help me
grow and become more of who I can become.
Speaker 2 (28:53):
It could be that you're here to.
Speaker 3 (28:54):
Become more unconditionally loving or learn to trust yourself more.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
I know for me.
Speaker 3 (29:00):
My work is always to become more emotionally independent and
not care so much about what others think of me,
and really follow my calling and listen to my truth
and share from my soul, not related to what anybody's
gonna think or say. It is. It is an addiction.
It is so hard to break. So I usually that's
usually my go to when I'm having some problems in
(29:20):
a relationship. It's like it helps me build that muscle
of turning within and turning to the creator and just
keeping you know, like looking for your lesson.
Speaker 2 (29:30):
And I do I do find that that.
Speaker 3 (29:33):
I would just encourage people of any age because a
lot of times parents I notice aren't realizing how much
they're still our being awakened and invited to learn and
grow as parents of adult children.
Speaker 2 (29:49):
And I'm amazed at.
Speaker 3 (29:52):
And inspired by how much growth for many not everyone's
open to that, how much growth they find and and
themselves by the challenge of being strained or stranged in
some way. And so just to always be reminded that
as long as we're breathing, we can taste that gift
of transformation, and we're being loved when we're challenged.
Speaker 1 (30:18):
I would love if we could spend the final minutes
of our conversation talking to those people who might be
on the receiving end of the rejection. Right, we spoke
mostly to how are we rejecting? And again, it might
not be a relationship, It might be a situation, a
(30:38):
dynamic that you are just like, I'm not dealing with this, right,
Anything that we're not willing to deal with has the same,
you know, it's part of this conversation. What if there
are people listening out there who are the ones that
have been rejected or being I'm not going to say marginalize,
(31:00):
because they don't think it's it's thematic. It's a personal issue.
If you feel you're being rejected, boxed in, labeled, falsely
designated as the perpetrator or the problem. What what kind
of consciousness can we embrace this week to shift that
(31:21):
relationship from our end, even though it might seem we
don't have any power ability in the physical sense to
ineffalence the relationship or the situation.
Speaker 2 (31:32):
Well, it's honestly, it's the same.
Speaker 3 (31:33):
Like it's it's that is your challenge then right now,
and it's and so it would be to do your
best to embrace what's happening, because so much of it
when when rejected, it feels so unfair. And so I
would also really move away from it's not going to
be fair, and to not get into much of the logic.
And if you want to repair the relationship, you especially
(31:55):
need to let go of unfair or fairness and and
and and I typically people need.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Support for this.
Speaker 3 (32:04):
It's hard to do by yourself, whether it's your your teacher,
a counselor, or a specialist of some kind that you trust.
But then I would also then see, what where is
this showing me something that I haven't been willing to
look at in myself. And most I'm telling you about
with these parents if I'm assuming it's a parent, and
but it could be a sibling.
Speaker 1 (32:24):
Or a it could be an ex, Yeah exactly that
you want to be amicable and your ex is like.
Speaker 2 (32:31):
Yeah, yes.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
But regardless, the theme it's that the wisdom doesn't change
in any circumstance. It's a it's an ironclad truth that
is still here to help you to go to whatever
your more fulfilled level will be. Or that feeling that
you are becoming growing is just feels so good. It's hard,
(32:54):
but it feels so good, so and so I would
look for that, look for where it's and then it's
in ways that you may not have expected it. We
are often so it's so concealed to us, we can't
often see how we are affecting someone or what may have.
Speaker 2 (33:09):
Caused the rejection.
Speaker 3 (33:10):
So I would encourage becoming curious as well. And even
if you think that the other person is imbalanced or
they're mentally ill, or they'll still have some value to
offer you of something that you have probably done or
said that didn't work for them, and it's good to
learn it. And so that's where some of the main
(33:30):
focus that I do when I do writing or sharing
and with clients or teaching or anything is really trying
to help learn teach people how to listen. It is
so hard, but listening without trying to influence, just truly
trying to put yourself and have empathy and see what
the other person's experience is. And we think we're better
(33:53):
at it than we are. We just are fundamentally not
very good at it. But it's a skill worth building,
is to us and to understand.
Speaker 1 (34:02):
Yeah, I think what what you shared sounds like something
that we've shared before. But probably not in the last
year or two on weekly energy boost. It's that when
there's when presented with any challenge, the first question the
Cabalysts teach us to ask ourselves is why is this
(34:22):
in my movie right? How can I grow from it?
What can I learn from it? Focusing first on not
what the other person did or said or didn't again,
taking out the should from the conversation, and really reflecting on,
like you were saying, being curious, trying to see in
a macro sense, how this could be for my highest good,
(34:46):
and then only then checking looking being curious about is
there anything I can do right now? Most people jump
into the do before the reflection process, and so when
you said before right listening to listen, not to respond,
not to influence, you might not even have the ability
(35:08):
to have an interaction right now, but initiating that process
of the creator decided this is the perfect thing for me.
My soul decided this is the perfect thing for me.
I want to know what it is, what am I
meant to get from this? And that's you know, it's
I imagine that what we're doing when we ask those
questions is we're taking the situation in for a big
(35:30):
hug rather than rejecting it. And so I feel like
also when you said put aside the fairness piece. I
find usually when people say that's not fair, what they're
really saying is I don't like it, and there's some
sort of vindication you feel when you say, well, that's
(35:51):
not fair, right, But the truth is it is fair.
You just don't like it, and it's okay not to
like it. We're not talking in this week episode about
love everything that happens unconditionally. We're talking about the open,
being open to receive something from everyone and everything, regardless
of how difficult or lacking or problematic it might be.
Speaker 3 (36:16):
Yes, there's something that I would love to add that's
been on my mind with so many of the things
that you're saying, and that is that so much of
the work is internal. And yes, you can repair externally,
but I've just seen the quantum miraculous shifts that happen.
Speaker 2 (36:31):
Which is what I've.
Speaker 3 (36:32):
Learned from studying Cabala and love about it so much,
is that when we change, that's when things change in
our life, and so there's lots of ways to remove cutoffs.
It can be internal as well, like even if you
find that you need space from someone, it's important to
also do the work so that you're not internally regarding
them as not filled with light or still.
Speaker 2 (36:54):
A lot of the work is what.
Speaker 3 (36:55):
You do internal and you can even if you're not
connected to this person, when you are doing your personal
growth work and you're getting your lessons, you should notice
that some of the resentment or some of the anger
and the hurt and the rejection does start to minimize
because you're starting to connect with your your source about it.
(37:17):
And as you get your lesson, it starts to help
you shift that like from that external locus of control
more to that internal And so if you're if you're
not connected now just I just want to inspire and
give hope that your internal work. You don't know when
or how, but it makes a huge difference.
Speaker 1 (37:37):
Look, it's the catalyst. You're in a world is actually
what attracts the external situation. So when the inner world shifts,
the outer world has to follow suit. Beautiful, I'm so
excited for people to take this in, sit with it
and make it work for them, each each person in
(37:58):
their own individual way, on their own level. You know,
you may feel that you need to take space from
a person, which is not the same as cutting them
out right. You can say I need I need a
couple of weeks to think about it. I'll get back
to you, or I'll let you know when I'm ready
to have that conversation. Right. Where's that's I want to say,
(38:19):
reasonable and healthy thing to do. If you need to
gather your thoughts or you're feeling you can't handle a
conversation in the moment, there's nothing wrong with rescheduling it,
but completely removing it from the calendar is essentially the
mistake that many of us make, and in removing it
(38:40):
from the list of possibilities, we're actually removing our connection
to blessings. And that I want to go back to
that first idea because the goal is that we welcome
and allow the universe to give us all that we
the infinite and limitless blessings that we can receive. We
want to get out of the way, and this is
(39:01):
one of the ways that the cabitalists teach we get
in our own way. We block the blessings because they're
meant to come through the difficult and challenging situations. Rachel,
thank you so much for appreciating this conversation. Yes, I'm
sure it's going to help countless people, and I know
every at the end of every episode, I say that
(39:23):
the most powerful thing you can do is share the episode.
Perhaps you know this episode can be especially helpful for
people who might not even be on the path of Kabbala,
on a spiritual path, but are suffering because of a
particular situation or relationship, and this might be the door
(39:45):
that opens them to resolution from a different perspective. Weekly
Energy Boost is available on all podcast platforms, YouTube, Facebook,
and Instagram. You can follow us on those platforms to
receive need more content to support you in living what
we share in every episode. You can also go to
our website weeklyenergyboost dot com, where you can learn more
(40:07):
about the things we think are important for our listeners
to know about, search through our archives, send us a message,
and click the donate button to help make Weekly Energy
Boost possible. Rachel again, these last forty minutes were priceless,
and I'm so excited for the world to connect with
you and your wisdom and your insight.
Speaker 2 (40:28):
And I hope we can do it again
Speaker 1 (40:32):
And we'll see you next week on the Weekly Energy
Boost
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