FULL SHOW POD: The Woody Show December 15th 2025 Podcast

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
What is due to the graphic nature of this program,
listener discretion is advised.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
The Woody Show.

Speaker 3 (00:22):
This is the Woody Show.

Speaker 4 (00:26):
Insensitivity Training.

Speaker 3 (00:37):
Class is now in session.

Speaker 4 (00:43):
Hey, what's good everybody?

Speaker 1 (00:45):
What up?

Speaker 4 (00:46):
Today is Monday?

Speaker 3 (00:47):
It is December fifteenth, twenty twenty five. We are the
Woody Show.

Speaker 5 (00:52):
Yeah, what if?

Speaker 4 (00:53):
That's great?

Speaker 5 (00:54):
Gory?

Speaker 3 (00:54):
Alright? We got Menace Chinograd right, Sea Bass is here,
We got Sammy who's argus aecutive producer. We got Morgan,
our associate producer, von Is a video producer, and then
we got Bort mentioning the Woody Show production department. Dumbass
Tyler is here. Thank you for being here and giving
us some of your valuable time today. Many ways to
be a part of the Woodi Show. You can call

(01:15):
in eight seven seven forty four Woodie, which after the
show becomes the after hours voicemail. You could text us
check in over to two two nine eight seven.

Speaker 4 (01:25):
You can find us and follow us on all the
social media platforms.

Speaker 3 (01:28):
Look for us there at the Woody Show, and of
course good old fashioned email, which is email at the
woodieshow dot com. Yeah, coming up for you on the
show today. We're going to sixty nine the news. Oh yeah, yeah,
we are speaking of sixty nine, and we'll get to
know Morgan's mom a little bit.

Speaker 6 (01:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:43):
Oh boy.

Speaker 3 (01:44):
A last man standing question, what's the dumbest thing you've
done on a dare? Okay, that and more today here
on The Woody Show, starting with this weird ass story
in the news. This chicken China nearly died after eating
almost nothing but vegetables and using laxatives for two weeks.

(02:04):
That'll do it, because she was trying to fit into
a new birthday dress.

Speaker 7 (02:08):
We've all been there, ladies.

Speaker 3 (02:10):
Yeah. So, she said that she lost strength in her
arms and legs, she struggled to breathe, and when the
doctor's tested her blood, her potassium level was dangerously low
and so they did a twelve hour emergency treatment to
save her life. Damn, she just sounds like something would
like she saidn't take laxative for two weeks.

Speaker 4 (02:30):
You know what that inspires me to maybe even try that. Yeah, So, Greg,
you're either overweight or just on weight right now? Really okay,
which is crazy?

Speaker 3 (02:43):
Not to be trusted, which which is insane.

Speaker 4 (02:45):
And when your doctor does nothing but talk about that,
you show up with like a laceration and well, let's
discuss your weight.

Speaker 8 (02:53):
That's very old. That doesn't sound yeah, this is this
a really old person old is yeah, yeah, not that
at all. Yeah, I'm skinny, right yeah, because Greg is
morbidly obese, I mean.

Speaker 3 (03:08):
Gay fat gay will which is which is not incorrect.
You can send us a text over to two to
nine eight seven. A couple of weird ass stories in
the news. This guy in Orlando, he robbed a restaurant

(03:30):
at Disney. You know they have Disney Springs, the Downtown
Disney are in Orlando. They don't call it Downtown Disney.
They used to, and now it's just called Disney Springs,
I think right, or is it? Is it separated in
the two separated anyway? This is where this is where
this restaurant was. It was in the Disney Springs area
and uh Paddlefish restaurant. The police say that after midnight

(03:52):
the restaurant was closed. The robber swam up to the restaurant,
tied up the employees inside, stole between ten and twenty
thousand dollars, and then jump back into the water, and
then swam off. She's all in the span of about
two minutes. Mission impossible swimmer. Yeah, like he pulled out.
He had a like professional scuba gear to do all this.

(04:14):
So the police are still searching for the guy.

Speaker 8 (04:15):
That's crazy.

Speaker 4 (04:17):
What did he look like?

Speaker 8 (04:18):
He was in black licra and had a snorkel.

Speaker 4 (04:20):
Yeah, like he swam up.

Speaker 8 (04:22):
That's rob And it is like Downtown Disney. It's the
same deal, but he's not called No, but it's the same,
like separated because.

Speaker 3 (04:31):
Did they have like a Paradise Peer or something like that.
It was like Paradise Island or something that was where
called the clubs and bars were. But then there was
like a like a Downtown Disney where all the shops.

Speaker 8 (04:41):
They called They used to call this Downtown Disney.

Speaker 3 (04:43):
No Disney Spring in Orlando.

Speaker 8 (04:45):
Yeah, damn, that's crazy.

Speaker 3 (04:46):
The weird crime story woman in Canada. She came home
after a vacation to find that somebody had been in
her apartment while she was gone. The thing is the
door was locked and she's like, what the hell, And
then she saw a giant hole in her floor.

Speaker 4 (04:58):
The cops are called.

Speaker 3 (05:00):
They followed the tunnel, realized that it started at the
apartment of one of her neighbors, one that she had
been having problems with and police saved. The guy had
tunneled his way like behind a fireplace. But also don't
know why the man did it because he's not talking. Yeah,
he tunneled into this chick's apartment.

Speaker 7 (05:20):
I know he just wants a complimentary thought she was hot.

Speaker 2 (05:23):
Yeah yeah, right, take initiative these days, that happened.

Speaker 4 (05:32):
He wants to get noticed. Why even try? But that's
but that's uh, that's happened.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
I feel more often recently where you hear about guys
will break into a store next to the one that
they want to rob.

Speaker 4 (05:48):
It's usually a jewelry store, and they'll.

Speaker 3 (05:49):
Come in through the wall or in then through the
ceiling and do things rather than breaking directly into the place.

Speaker 4 (05:58):
There was a story in then was I think just
today about some dude found living in a crawl space
in some apartments some condo complex had a TV and
lights and a band in crawl space.

Speaker 8 (06:11):
Can you imagine like living in your crawl space?

Speaker 3 (06:14):
I would love that.

Speaker 4 (06:14):
There's like, yeah, there's been stores where like people living
on top of the display.

Speaker 9 (06:21):
Yeah, there's a movie that came out called Roofman with
Chantitaneum Channon. Yeah, it's it's based off a real story
off this guy that lived at a Toys to Us
and he would steal the toys because he was hooking
up with this single mom and then give the toys
to the kid and stuff.

Speaker 4 (06:41):
So, yeah, he was living on the roof. Yeah, he
was living in the store and like some just display
in a display. Yeah, so you know, because remember I
would have like the kind of like Costco will have
racks all the way to the top. This guy just
like built like this little apartment up there and lived in. Yeah,
look up in the storage racks. Yeah, look up the trailer.

Speaker 1 (07:04):
I do know.

Speaker 4 (07:04):
It was based on titanium.

Speaker 3 (07:10):
Tum text us. Check in over to two two nine
eighty seven more what he shows next?

Speaker 10 (07:18):
What's up?

Speaker 9 (07:19):
What do you show? Podcast listeners? I'm gonna tell you
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Speaker 4 (07:24):
Right now.

Speaker 3 (07:25):
What's going on? Everybody?

Speaker 4 (07:26):
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Speaker 9 (07:27):
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Speaker 3 (08:20):
Comically large, disgusting.

Speaker 4 (08:22):
The Woody Show.

Speaker 3 (08:25):
Greg, I tried, and I know menace. We were looking
to try those new Reese's oreo. Yeah, yeah, I saw him.
I saw them at the grocery store.

Speaker 11 (08:35):
News.

Speaker 3 (08:35):
I saw them. Oh you did buy them?

Speaker 9 (08:37):
Okay, Because I was like, dude, this shows the power
of ze bound because I saw him and I didn't
buy that.

Speaker 4 (08:44):
Really, I'm like the old me would have been like happened?

Speaker 3 (08:47):
Let me cop fiveas. Yeah, I just bought the one
because you know, my wife and I are both uh huh,
you know, peanut butter and chocolate fans.

Speaker 4 (08:55):
Most people, although our kids. That's the thing. We can
leave those sitting out and the kids would.

Speaker 8 (09:00):
I think there's something wrong with those children.

Speaker 3 (09:01):
That's what I think too. Like the kids like they'll
go trick or treating and they'll give us all of.

Speaker 4 (09:06):
The Reese's peanut butter that's around. To fine, that's what
they don't want. They're like they want the fruit chewy stuff,
you know.

Speaker 3 (09:13):
Like they like some of the other chocolate stuffy, they
just don't like the peanut butter chocolate combiny.

Speaker 4 (09:19):
Bizarre. Now this Reese's Oreo thing, is this the one
with the cream on top? No, no, there's the chunks inside. No, no,
it's different. This is just the Oreo cookie, but it's
got the Reese's peanut butter the flip side on the
way around something different.

Speaker 3 (09:33):
And then Reese's did something with Oreo where yes, I
think they have like chunks. They did see something where
it's like the Oreo cream is kind of on the
outside of looks like a peanut butter cup.

Speaker 9 (09:44):
We're confused then, because I was talking about something else.
It's like it looks like the King packs the four
that has the four Reeses inside, but it's like an
Oreo collap right.

Speaker 4 (09:54):
Well, I saw those too. I didn't.

Speaker 3 (09:55):
I didn't buy those. Those did not look interesting to me.
But I did buy the actual Oreos. Get them. I
give them an.

Speaker 4 (10:01):
Eight out of ten decent. Yeah, they're good.

Speaker 3 (10:04):
But Oreo also just has regular Oreo peanut butter, whether
it's the peanut butter.

Speaker 4 (10:09):
Then those are just as good.

Speaker 8 (10:10):
Yeah, what's the difference.

Speaker 3 (10:11):
I don't really get, you know, Like, to me, the
the Reese's peanut butter has a distinct flavor and a
distinct texture, like.

Speaker 4 (10:20):
Yeah, the texture and the flavor. I didn't get that.
It's kind of chalky. Yeah, I didn't. I didn't really
get that, which I love. Yeah, me too.

Speaker 3 (10:26):
You say that like it sounds maybe negative. I'm not
trying to be negative positive. Yeah, No, I didn't get
like that signature Reese's like peanut butter flavor.

Speaker 4 (10:35):
But it's good. But they're really good. Yeah, but the
regular peanut butter is just as good.

Speaker 3 (10:39):
Yeah, the regular the regular ones, the ones that weren't
done in collabed with Resons those are also good, but
those are just the regular cookie aisle. They don't have
like the special end cap and these four pack things
that I'm talking about, like the like convenience store and stuff. Yeah,
eight seven seven forty four Wooding text us check in
over to two two nine eight seven in a show minutes.

Speaker 12 (11:01):
Will eat something gross, he'll be hungry in an hour,
the Woody Show will be right back.

Speaker 3 (11:19):
All right. So how about this this story, this seems
like something you know, Sammy would do. This forty eight
year old dude in North Carolina. He had up the
local Longhorn steakhowls and he wanted to bring his dog
along for the meal. So, you know, I say, that's

(11:39):
what you should do, just just bring just bring your
dog everywhere.

Speaker 1 (11:42):
What's the weird part.

Speaker 3 (11:43):
Yeah, So he ordered his food, he starts eating, and
he made sure that his dog got some of that
juicy steak. Lucky waitress comes over says, hey, man, you
know you can't do that. It's a health code violation.
And he's like, oh blah blah blah. So she's like
you gotta leave. Yeah, all right, So he doesn't like that.
He flips out on the poor waitress throws a plate
at her. Oh my god, smashes are square in the

(12:05):
nog and she ends up with several stitches and had
to have a cat scan which show that she suffered
a hairline fracture.

Speaker 4 (12:12):
Because his dick wants to bring his dog on a date,
I hope he got arrested for assault.

Speaker 11 (12:16):
He was.

Speaker 3 (12:17):
He was arrested in and taken to jail. Idiot, not
saying you'd smash somebody with a plate. I frequently getting
in physical sounds like an act. But I would never
think to bring the dog to Longhorn Steakhouse.

Speaker 8 (12:31):
I sit it in a chair.

Speaker 13 (12:32):
Yeah, I will bring her if it's outdoor seating somewhere.

Speaker 14 (12:35):
Some places let dogs out on the patio.

Speaker 13 (12:37):
No, my dog is in her bag anyway, so it's
not She's not a big dog sitting there right next
to someone else's table trying to sniff and eat their food.

Speaker 14 (12:44):
So I find it to be minimal disruption. But even
then they'll come over and be like, oh, like on
the patio in the bag. Some places don't like it,
so really yeah.

Speaker 3 (12:53):
But like you know, God forbid anybody that actually calls
you out on it. You know, like, hey, you know
what maybe the inside the grocery store or is not
the place I see that every day though, it's becoming normalized,
which is I don't think that's cool. Yeah, certain placeship dogs,
but yeah the same way that people think it's weird
seeing kids in certain places, like this is an inappropriate

(13:14):
place to have a child.

Speaker 8 (13:15):
And also think about your dog, like they could be
at home in their comfy spot with air conditioning, or
you're dragging around on at home.

Speaker 13 (13:23):
And my loves target and lows, Yeah.

Speaker 3 (13:31):
That's a target, Like why like why why are you
bringing the dog in the target? I mean, I love dogs,
you know, my worship dogs. I love dogs, but damn.
Some other animal news, and speaking of dogs, this four
year old shelter pit bull named Sienna became a hero
after sensing a man was about to have a seizure
during this UH Virginia Shelters adoption event. While being walked

(13:55):
by a volunteer, Sienna broke from the group, went straight
to the guy, gently placed her paw on him, and
re choosing to move. His wife soon recognized he was
experiencing the subtle seizure activity, and Sienna's behavior alerted them
in time. The shelter says that this is a reason
not to overlook a stray dog at your local shelter
because they have amazing traits. Now I have a theory

(14:16):
on this, because you know, being a pit bull.

Speaker 4 (14:19):
Here comes no rank.

Speaker 3 (14:25):
Did I say that Sienna was trying what you're about
to get, You're about to and is going to pile
on two? No? No, I I was going to share
something else. Sienna came up and then just put her
paw on him to let all the other dogs know that, Hey,
when this guy dies, he's mine. Yeah, I get to
my meal exactly. I was completely off. It's completely off.

(14:48):
I was gonna ask you, have you seen the dumb
dog test online?

Speaker 15 (14:51):
Yet?

Speaker 9 (14:52):
What you do is you hold up your dog and
you walk towards a wall, and if your dog puts
out its pod to stop from being pushed into the wall,
and your dogs smart. If it doesn't, we'd be walking
right in there, dumb.

Speaker 3 (15:04):
Right. One of my dogs passed the tests.

Speaker 4 (15:06):
The other did not.

Speaker 2 (15:07):
Oh No.

Speaker 3 (15:09):
Some other animal news, the US Fish and Wildlife Service
recently announced that they want to add drafts to the
Endangered Species Act. The draft population, I guess, has been
on a dramatic decline thanks to habitat loss caused by urbanization, poaching,
and illegal trade. The government is trying to reduce draft poaching.

(15:31):
This is in Africa, by the way, by limiting the
impact of draft body parts and products like rugs and
jewelry and shoes made from their remains. I didn't know
that either. I've heard, you know, elephant tusks and things
like that, or.

Speaker 4 (15:46):
Yeah, I heard that they were in trouble, but I do.
I totally thought you were saying draft for a while
and yeah, and I was like, oh, there's going to
have a draft on who survives or not.

Speaker 3 (15:57):
I heard it too, you did. Yeah, I thought even
when I started with the US Fish and Wildlife Service,
we're all getting out that they want to add drafts
to the endangered species. Very confusing. All right, I'm sorry,
all right, some other food news. Uh, horses are we

(16:17):
talking about? Like you know, the the test that menicer
just talking about with the wall and everything and your
dog intelligence? But do horses are much more intelligent than
previous previously thought? Researchers wanted to understand more about how
horses learn. So this whole experiment with some treats and
you know, they like treats, apples, you know what, you
know what, The horses really like a lot. You ever
see those little red and white starlight mints like you see,

(16:42):
they love those things really Yeah, so weird. Yeah, my
dad trains race sources. I told you that, and uh
you know they'll keep like like a bag of these
little star whatever. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (16:52):
Yeah, I heard they like sugar cubes and sugar cubes.
They love sugar cubes.

Speaker 3 (16:56):
Uh yeah, but like apples, carrots, you know, all that
kind of stuff. Anyway, so they experiment with the treats,
and they were quick to learn different games in order
to get that treat. They believe the show is a
higher level of cognitive processing than previously thought possible because
the horses were able to instantly switch strategies and behave
differently as soon as there was a risk of the

(17:17):
treat being taken away.

Speaker 8 (17:18):
So that's cool because I thought they're like people like, oh.

Speaker 3 (17:21):
Horses are so dumb.

Speaker 4 (17:22):
Oh no, they're not done at all. But I know
a guy that trains horses to dance.

Speaker 3 (17:29):
When they do that whole there's that one where it's
like a famous looks like a Mexican family, like around
the big party in their house and a freaking horse
in the living room of what looks like either like
a small little bungalow house or an apartment or and
the horse is just kind.

Speaker 9 (17:45):
Of like yea, I love it, like yeah, yeah, it's awesome.

Speaker 3 (17:51):
Some other animal news, this has been getting a lot
of a lot of attention over in Florida. The state
has been dealing with a snake problem, Burmese pythons, to
be exactly, have you heard about this burmese python thing
in Florida. This one guy's name is Aaron Man. He
has captured a record eighty seven of them in just
one Monthy. It's got them one thousand dollars of government money,

(18:11):
and he's on the hunt for more because the state's
now offering fifty dollars for each snake, and potentially more
if the snake is longer than normal. The state has
had over nineteen thousand pythons removed since the two thousands
and they still have this problem.

Speaker 4 (18:29):
Is just overpopulation, man, It's crazy.

Speaker 8 (18:31):
Is this some dummy that had it as a prize
or whatever and then let it go.

Speaker 4 (18:35):
Like rabbits Everglades?

Speaker 1 (18:37):
Right?

Speaker 4 (18:37):
And then.

Speaker 3 (18:40):
For the record, if you were to catch nineteen thousand
of these snakes that would get you just under a
million bucks, all right, gooy Yeah. And also in the
Florida Everglades, scientists are using forty solar powered robot rabbits
menace to trap these pythons.

Speaker 1 (18:56):
Ohe.

Speaker 3 (18:58):
So the decoys mimicked the movement, body, heat, and scent
of the marsh rabbits, a favorite prey of the pythons,
to lure them into the open. The robots are remotely
controlled and they're equipped with sensors to alert the handlersslots.
So yeah, that's pretty cool. And then also, uh, they

(19:19):
just did a ten day python challenge and so they're
again just paying people to uh to catch the pythons.
Now there are rules like you couldn't use firearms, explosives, dogs, drones,
traps or even bait. Well it was a competition, and
so you got to grab a snake by the hand,

(19:40):
damn or with like a you know.

Speaker 4 (19:42):
Those noose they call them a noose pole.

Speaker 3 (19:44):
It's a little thing on the end the pole. It's
got like the loop on the end of the and
uh and then you end its life humanely. They say,
how close range air like an air gun or like
a just a sharp blow that stuns it before you know,
going in the brain. Yeah, but yeah, they had this

(20:04):
this python.

Speaker 9 (20:05):
Chest and then you make sweet but yeah, I'm broke
as hell and I'm unemployed. I'm just gonna walk around
and try to catch them snakes in the meantime.

Speaker 4 (20:11):
Yeah, a little and go near them.

Speaker 1 (20:15):
Next, this is the Woody Show.

Speaker 4 (20:20):
That's a Greg gun. He has some questions for us
mm hmm from driver's test. These are sample questions from
actual driver's tests, some of which, like you said, if
you have just a tiny bit of common sense, they're
going to be quite obvious, right.

Speaker 3 (20:36):
I forget what it was like, how many questions are
there and what you have to get right in order
to pass. Yeah, it was like it was to be perfect. Now,
like seventy percent I think passes. Yeah yeah, I mean
you can tell just by people on the road, yes, yeah.

Speaker 4 (20:51):
And then when you fail, I think you have to
wait a couple of weeks to take it again. Someone
think so I thought I didn't.

Speaker 3 (20:57):
I mean I know that.

Speaker 1 (20:58):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (20:58):
I feel you to wait and that's the punishment.

Speaker 3 (21:01):
Because like where I went to get my driver's test,
had I failed, I was able to come back the
next day, because I remember my my aunt was the
one who drove me to the driver's test, and then
she had said, hey, look so I have both days
off in case you don't pass today, we can come
back tomorrow.

Speaker 4 (21:16):
I think in different places have different rules. Yeah, and
maybe it's changed. I mean it was a long time ago.

Speaker 13 (21:20):
So you're talking about the written permit test correct, not
behind the driver's test.

Speaker 4 (21:25):
No, just the just the driver's test.

Speaker 13 (21:27):
Oh see, I had to wait, I shocking. I failed
the drivers I had to wait a certain period of
time before I could go back.

Speaker 3 (21:35):
Yeah, varies by state, someplaces a week, two weeks.

Speaker 4 (21:38):
I not I passed the actual driving portion when the
instructor goes with you. But I did get dinged a
few points because he said I was speeding, And in
my head I thought he would think I was a
total nerd If I stayed at the speed limit, I
thought he's going to think I'm gray. So I went
over the speed limit and that's where I got dinged.
You're going too fast. But in my head, I thought,

(22:01):
you're just gonna think I'm a total dark I'll look
at this guy doing with his hands at ten and two, right,
what a nerd. That's fine.

Speaker 3 (22:09):
You know, I didn't even have a permit. I went
right from not driving to a license.

Speaker 4 (22:15):
It must vary by state, because I don't Yeah.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
No, if you had a certain age, you don't have
to get a permit.

Speaker 4 (22:19):
I was eighteen.

Speaker 3 (22:20):
Oh that's yeah, dorks. Well I'm stuck in boarding schools.
Couldn't go get your driver's license my parents. It wasn't selective. Yeah,
I'm sure you were great.

Speaker 4 (22:33):
Yeah, yeah, I was a pretty great kid.

Speaker 3 (22:36):
Actually, all right, So Greg Gory's driving testes are multiple choice.

Speaker 4 (22:40):
Right, yes they are. There's only three choices per question.
Some of them are getting very common sense, like this one.
When is it legal to drive off the road to
pass another vehicle? If the vehicle's turning left, it is
not legal under any conditions, Or if there are two
or more one way lanes.

Speaker 3 (23:01):
To drive off the road or to pass the car,
it's never legal.

Speaker 4 (23:05):
Never legal. Okay, well done, makes sense. Never legal.

Speaker 16 (23:09):
She write these down, so Samy can't pick your back up, right, answers.

Speaker 4 (23:13):
Oh, yeah, they're right. I know. She didn't give it
an answer right away.

Speaker 17 (23:17):
Yeah, she waited until we all say exactly what I'm saying.
So okay, all right. Well then first, okay, Sammy, okay,
so sweet. When a railroad crossing is not controlled railroad,
what is the speed limit when you are within one
hundred feet and cannot see for four hundred feet in
both directions? Is it fifteen miles an hour? Ten miles
an hour or twenty five miles an hour?

Speaker 14 (23:39):
Fifteen?

Speaker 3 (23:41):
I wanna say ten? Yeah, Well, that's not even an
option one. It's fifteen, ten or twenty five hour? Oh fifteen?
I mean yeah, yeah.

Speaker 16 (23:52):
On all these things, it's always the smart move to
make the safest bet. So I'll say ten.

Speaker 3 (23:57):
Sammy and Menace are correct. Fifteen. Wow, all right, very
job to be fair. Ten wasn't even an answer, So.

Speaker 4 (24:03):
Yeah, that's true.

Speaker 3 (24:04):
We just wasn't even option. Well.

Speaker 4 (24:05):
I knew the right answer right away, so I think
you hear the rest.

Speaker 3 (24:09):
I got it, all right. So I'm fifty.

Speaker 4 (24:12):
What speed should you be driving when entering onto a
highway at or near the speed of traffic? Faster than
the speed of traffic, slower than the speed of traffic,
at the speed of traffic.

Speaker 14 (24:25):
Or near speed of traffic?

Speaker 3 (24:27):
Correct? Ten miles an hour. You are all correct? Noice
near the speed.

Speaker 16 (24:34):
I remember my friend got his learner and he did
he'd never merged onto a highway before, so he came
to a dead stop here.

Speaker 4 (24:40):
Oh it was not fun. People suck his case.

Speaker 3 (24:46):
First time driving, which don't go on the highway. But yeah, hey, Also,
can you guys not be dicks? Like if you're in
the far right lane and there's an on ramp where
traffic is merging and you have the ability to get
over a lane over a lane over, yeah, like there's
no other place for the merging traffic to go. You're
in this lane, I'm here, it's mine right, not moving,

(25:09):
I'm supposed to damn near stop it's an on ramp.
And also, don't be a dick. If you missed your
turn or your turn is about to be here and
you're in the wrong lane, correct it later. Don't just
go flying across all the.

Speaker 4 (25:21):
Work or stop or stop you screwed up, You screwed up,
Go beyond your turn and correct it lane.

Speaker 16 (25:27):
Another move that I see all the time these days.
Let's say we are merging onto a highway. If there's
two of us and we've got both have space to
get over, and we're merging on there's a guy behind.
I see this all the time. Well, they'll they'll get
over and and and then they'll.

Speaker 4 (25:41):
Speed up as fast as they can.

Speaker 16 (25:43):
And then when you try to get over, they hawk
at you right because there mister speedy, speedy racing zoo
zoom zoom, and they're like, oh, how dare you merge ups?

Speaker 4 (25:52):
You cut me off?

Speaker 3 (25:53):
Jack as exactly? I admit I got this one wrong. Okay.

Speaker 4 (25:58):
How many feet away should you switch from high beam
to low beam headlights when approaching a vehicle coming towards you? Okay,
nine hundred feet?

Speaker 3 (26:06):
I mean I do it as soon as I see
another cargo, as soon as I see I'm not like, well,
I wonder what the distance is?

Speaker 4 (26:10):
Right?

Speaker 3 (26:11):
Exactly? Nine hundred feet seven hundred feet five hundred feet.

Speaker 7 (26:17):
Five hundred.

Speaker 4 (26:20):
I think, yeah, five uh yeah, we'll say what was.

Speaker 3 (26:23):
The middle one? Nine hundred, seven hundred, seven hundred, five hundred,
seven hundred. Correct answer is five hundred.

Speaker 4 (26:30):
Wow, it is pretty well.

Speaker 3 (26:32):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (26:32):
This driving test made me think, too, are people a
good gauge of how many feet no they are between something? No?
Because technically I think if you're making a right turn,
you're supposed to signal. Is it one hundred feet before
the turn? How do I know how many feet away?

Speaker 3 (26:45):
I tell people I got a ten incher. Clearly you're
bad with that's been proven wrong. But that's just not
a good eyeball on it, you know. Yeah, okay, how
about this one? What should you do when there's a
school bus ahead that starts flashing yellow warning lights? See up? Yeah,
before they stopped, get around exactly what Seabat was talking about.
Let's get out, slow down, and prepare to stop, stop immediately,

(27:08):
and remain stopped cautiously past the school bus on the left,
so to stop. Yeah, the first one. They have a
stops on the side of those things for exactly. You're
all correct on that one. That was easy.

Speaker 16 (27:21):
I love it when cops will follow school buses and
just wait for people to be dicks.

Speaker 4 (27:24):
And go Inevitably they get somebody print money. This one
I thought was odd. Which of the following is a
requirement of the basic speed law?

Speaker 11 (27:35):
All right?

Speaker 4 (27:35):
Basic speed? Yeah, exactly right. Always drive the speed limit
regardless of conditions. Match your speed to your surrounding traffic.
Never drive faster than is safe for current conditions.

Speaker 3 (27:49):
Third one, match your speed, I'd say number one.

Speaker 4 (27:52):
Number three wood, he's the only one getting his license.
Number three, never drive faster than is safe for current conditions.

Speaker 3 (27:58):
I was also thinking there, but you didn't say it
out loud, I said my brain.

Speaker 4 (28:02):
Okay, which of the following is an example of a
safe driving practice? Staring only at the middle of the road,
always keeping your eyes moving to scan the surroundings, or
using high beam headlights in the fog.

Speaker 16 (28:19):
In the number two, what about when it's kind of
rainy outside, turning on your emergency flashers?

Speaker 3 (28:24):
Right, what about that option D scanning? Yes, scanning number two? Okay,
you all get your license?

Speaker 1 (28:31):
Nice?

Speaker 4 (28:31):
Nice?

Speaker 3 (28:32):
Yeah, because when you first start driving, you're doing number one,
where you're.

Speaker 4 (28:37):
Just staring like right in front of you.

Speaker 3 (28:39):
You're so afraid to even check your mirrors like you
do that quick head look yet vision.

Speaker 4 (28:45):
Yeah, just freaking out. But then I always thought, oh,
road conditions, if it's wet, you slow down. If it's raining, obviously,
But then okay, so if that means on a nice day,
I can speed because the weather conditions are just so beautiful.

Speaker 3 (28:55):
Oh yeah, dog, sure.

Speaker 4 (28:57):
Shouldn't it go both ways? Argue that on that?

Speaker 3 (28:59):
Yeah, I will break out your great demeanor I will
with the officer, and it's a sunny day, I can
go one hundred. Have you not read the manual?

Speaker 1 (29:07):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (29:08):
You could do like E breaks spins and I pay
your salary. That's right. Give give us one more here,
Greg Goring, all right, you are under eighteen years of age,
and you have had your license for eight months.

Speaker 3 (29:20):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (29:21):
You may drive at any time between five am and
eleven pm.

Speaker 3 (29:27):
I give me one more time. I'm okay. Under eighteen.

Speaker 4 (29:30):
You are under eighteen eighteen, okay, and you've had your
license for eight months.

Speaker 3 (29:34):
Got it.

Speaker 4 (29:35):
You may drive at any time between five am and
eleven pm, or between seven am and eight pm.

Speaker 3 (29:42):
This is a new law before my I mean after
my time.

Speaker 4 (29:45):
That's what I'm taking.

Speaker 7 (29:47):
Eleven.

Speaker 4 (29:48):
I think maybe until, but you're under eighteen.

Speaker 3 (29:50):
I would say until eight pm unless you have a
circumstance like a work thing, you know, like you have
like a work permit or something like that, or you
can show that you're coming from work. I say anytime, anytime.

Speaker 14 (30:03):
I say five and eleven.

Speaker 4 (30:04):
I'll be honest, I guess at any time as well. Yeah,
it is between five am and eleven pm. Eleven pm, Yeah,
I mean like I didn't know. I thought once you
have your license.

Speaker 14 (30:14):
Ye, well, her few thing that goes on.

Speaker 13 (30:16):
There's weird rules for the first year that you have
your license that are different.

Speaker 4 (30:20):
Wasn't there also rules about like having other people in
the car with you?

Speaker 3 (30:23):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (30:23):
Yeah, is that just with your permit?

Speaker 3 (30:25):
I think about with.

Speaker 4 (30:26):
Your permit, the driver that you're with has to be licensed,
and I think twenty five is that right?

Speaker 15 (30:31):
Yeah?

Speaker 13 (30:31):
But if once you actually have your license, you can't
drive with anyone in the car other than your siblings
or an adult for like the first six months, I
think it is.

Speaker 4 (30:39):
Yeah, okay, so that way you just kill your family, right, right, right,
have somebody else's family.

Speaker 16 (30:44):
But like, also, you've never known anybody who's gotten busted
for that beausemeber hearing that, Yeah, have an eighteen year
old or whatever in here and.

Speaker 4 (30:50):
Getting pulled over. I think you're too young. Depends is
at the end of the month that they need quotas
filled and.

Speaker 3 (30:56):
Tickets?

Speaker 4 (30:57):
You know, could you do one more sure? This is
one that I also got at what point during a
rainfall are roads slippery on a hot day?

Speaker 3 (31:05):
I know this one because my dad told it to
me all the time. I was a little kid.

Speaker 4 (31:08):
Before we get the guesses, what is it? So?

Speaker 1 (31:11):
What?

Speaker 3 (31:11):
What sort of options do we have? The first I
thought you knew.

Speaker 4 (31:16):
So immediately after it stopped raining, Yes, for the first
several minutes, or when it has been raining for a
few hours.

Speaker 3 (31:22):
For several minutes. First several minutes. First that guy, because
everyone told you that that's when the oil is.

Speaker 11 (31:30):
Heard.

Speaker 4 (31:30):
That only in context of motorcycles, though, everything right, for
the first several minutes. The tires right, see, I learned
as well. All right, well there's the Greggry driving past. Yeah,
I think I would have basically pass yeah, noise, all
right on the roads. Yes, I got some more Woody
Show coming up.

Speaker 3 (31:49):
Hang on show this show fuck like just the fat
people standing? Who are you fart knockers?

Speaker 1 (32:00):
This is the Woody Show.

Speaker 3 (32:03):
Gay beat them?

Speaker 4 (32:05):
I've still got a Woody Well.

Speaker 3 (32:09):
There's a lot of different ways you can get updated
on the news. You can watch TV and read stuff
on the internet or on social media. Always you just
get it the conversation in the break room at work.
Maybe it's on something like The Daily Show to get
all your news or the Onion. But here on the
WOODI Show. We'd like to get it a different way,

(32:31):
We like to sixty nine out. What's sixty nine the news?

Speaker 8 (32:35):
It all comes together on sixty nine News and this
first story.

Speaker 3 (32:40):
The National Nuclear Security Administration just published some very hard numbers.
First of all, hard about America's nuclear stockpile. The report
list how many we've got, which is three thousand seven
and forty eight that weekend, still fine, And how many
have been dismantled over the last year.

Speaker 11 (33:00):
Of those?

Speaker 3 (33:00):
Oh, yeah, sixty nine, that's right. In other sixty nine
the news, This guy the news after he set a
Guinness World Record for having the most rabbit tattoos on
his body.

Speaker 4 (33:12):
Sweet, guess how many he has? Sixty nine tattoos?

Speaker 3 (33:19):
Rabbit tattoos? He's forty two. Got a late start on
the rabbit thing, so he only got his first one
back in twenty nineteen. And he doesn't even have a
rabbit in real life. He says he just loves the
esthetic of a rabbit a little frigging weird.

Speaker 4 (33:33):
So yeah, seventeen nine, he gets seventy, so you can
break his record.

Speaker 3 (33:38):
Sixty nine in the news, sixty nine news, is there
sixty nine news right here on your radio? Some good
news when it comes to teen moms. The CDC just
released some new data on teen birth rates, and between
twenty and twenty twenty two they were down significantly, a
whopping and he guesses sixty nine percent.

Speaker 4 (33:57):
Sixty nine percent.

Speaker 3 (33:58):
Wow, sixteen. Back in two thousand, there were more than
four hundred and seventy five thousand babies born the teen moms.
In twenty twenty two, there were just over one hundred
and forty five thousand. That's the largest birth rate decline ever.
The biggest drop is with the girls between fifteen and seventeen.

Speaker 4 (34:17):
So wow, they're nice.

Speaker 3 (34:18):
That goes against what they were saying, like that Team
Mom glorified teens getting pregnant.

Speaker 13 (34:24):
Oh no, I heard the opposite of that, that they
saw the reality of what being a team mom was.

Speaker 3 (34:29):
Yeah, failed fortune.

Speaker 9 (34:30):
I think, yeah, I think that actually what happened. But
like initially when te Mom came out, they thought it
would like would glorify.

Speaker 3 (34:40):
Yeah, but the thing is, you watch that if you're
like a dumb kid and you're watching that and you
see like, oh yeah, the show itself is like oh man,
that sucks. But then you keep hearing about them and
all the celebrity stuff. TMZ covering them as if they're
like legit celebrities.

Speaker 4 (34:54):
Yeah, and didn't we see in the news somewhat recently
that younger generations these days they're.

Speaker 3 (34:58):
Not all that sexual. Yeah, they're not banging a lot. Yeah,
for whatever reason. I don't know, if it's just like
they're scared. You would have thought we would have been
more scared with the whole AIDS thing.

Speaker 4 (35:09):
Totally.

Speaker 3 (35:10):
Now it's like it was always something nobody cares about age,
You know what I'm saying, Like eighties aides is so eighties?

Speaker 4 (35:18):
Yeah, yeah really, but there's less and less like sexual.
I don't know in person connection these days with younger people. Right,
but if you want the in person connection, think how
easy it is now. Yeah, if you just have some
kind of confidence, Yeah, oh then you Yeah.

Speaker 3 (35:34):
Way to keep those legs closed, ladies, keep it up. See,
I got another one here for you, all right.

Speaker 4 (35:39):
Sixty nine Yeah, yeah, it's hot, it's hot.

Speaker 3 (35:42):
Oh yeah. A new survey pulled over one thousand people
and asked if they would think about quitting their job
if given orders to relocate, and what percentage of workers
said they would greg sixty nine.

Speaker 4 (35:53):
I'm sixty nine percent is sixty nine.

Speaker 3 (35:56):
Yeah. Broken down by age groups, seventy eight percent of
people in their twenties, seventy five percent of people in
their thirties, and sixty four percent of people forting up
say that they would really would relocate, would relocate? How
and there's you're sixty nine in the news.

Speaker 7 (36:10):
It all comes together on sixty nine years.

Speaker 3 (36:13):
Yes, they're always keeping you updated the latest and sixty
nine news. Never been forced to relocate, I mean I
wouldn't say I was forced to relocate.

Speaker 4 (36:23):
Yeah, I mean I guess nobody can force.

Speaker 3 (36:25):
It gave me a lot of options, a lot more
options than these people. Then I was up up against
where they're like, oh, well, I'm never leaving this town.
I can't be more than ten miles away from my parents.
I'm a growing acidult. I'm gonna give up this career
that I've already worked ten years because God forbid, it'd
be more than ten minutes away from my mom.

Speaker 14 (36:45):
It's nice to be close to family.

Speaker 3 (36:47):
It is nice to be close to family. I'm not
arguing that I'm jealous of people who are. I'm saying
these people that are just tethered, yeah, and they can't
for whatever even if it's a great opportunity, they just
can't bring themselves. Like, dude, eventually, I'm sorry to break it.
Your parents are gonna be dead. They're gonna be gone,
and it's gonna be you, and you have to look
out for your family and your life and your future
and your retirement.

Speaker 4 (37:07):
Yeah before then you die. Your parents are worthless, Sam, Yeah,
just die something. Yeah. Just get about them now yeaeah.

Speaker 3 (37:16):
So yeah, get the head, get the head, start, jump
on it, and just forget about them right now, right
They're just drains on you.

Speaker 4 (37:22):
Really.

Speaker 2 (37:22):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (37:22):
We were talking about high school reunions recently, and it
made me think that the last time I went to
a high school reunion, I would say ninety five percent
of the kids I graduated with still live in our
old hometown.

Speaker 3 (37:35):
Oh really, almost all of them.

Speaker 4 (37:36):
I didn't find the case with mine. Really, yeah, I
think like maybe two percent of them still live.

Speaker 12 (37:42):
Wow.

Speaker 3 (37:42):
If you can pull it off, great, I know, you know,
but if you especially depending on what you you have
for a career, yeah exactly. I mean I I've known
people that have given up what they went to school
for and you know, they end up having a job
that was relatively close to the hometown and then they
got out of it all together just because they couldn't
find another job doing that within a you know, thirty

(38:03):
mile radius of where they already are of the hometown.
It was because, well, I can't imagine not being able
to go to my cousin's birthday party.

Speaker 4 (38:11):
It's like, oh, okay, well, I mean you can make it.

Speaker 3 (38:14):
Yeah, I'm mocking it because that wouldn't be my decision
if that's your decision, and that's what's ultimately the most
important to you. And I do trust me. I love
my family.

Speaker 1 (38:24):
I do.

Speaker 3 (38:24):
I know it sounds like I don't, you know, No,
I can feel it.

Speaker 4 (38:28):
Yeah, I'm very close to my family totally.

Speaker 2 (38:31):
And you know, but.

Speaker 4 (38:35):
There are airplanes, there are video calls.

Speaker 3 (38:37):
Now, you can do all kinds of stuff to keep
in touch with people, but in your your everyday life
to set yourself up so that you can have a future,
and you're selling yourself short just because you can't go
to all your cousin's birthday parties.

Speaker 4 (38:52):
To me seems a little silly. All you have to
do is do what I did. You move for a job,
and then you hound your family to move to that
same town. Can do that, it's not the other way around. Yeah,
you can do that, right, And then they say, no,
we're not going to do it right. I honess on them.

Speaker 13 (39:06):
I know a lot of people who end up moving
back to their hometown once they're having kids because that's
where their parents are and they can get help with
the kids that way, and it is really nice because
childcare is expensive and if your parents are around and
you have kids and they can help help with that,
that's a big deal.

Speaker 3 (39:22):
I guess I'm talking more about people who have like
a real career going and just because they can't get,
you know, a job in their own tak so they
give up on that, on something that they really liked.

Speaker 4 (39:34):
They or they went to school with a career trajectory.

Speaker 3 (39:37):
Yeah, I know who you're talking about. There's a number
of people. Yeah, there's a number of people that I
I mean neither. I'm thinking about one one person in
particular in my life that I know completely gave up
on all that stuff and that has a job that
they hate making a fraction of the money they could
have made going forward, and will admit that they have
any regrets, but I know they do. I could see

(40:00):
it in their eyes, but they get to see mom
and dad. Yeah, yeah, eight.

Speaker 4 (40:04):
Seven seven forty four what he had us? Some of
the text over to two to two nine eight seven
more Woody shows. Next, Hang up, are you all in.

Speaker 3 (40:17):
Show?

Speaker 11 (40:18):
Actually? I understand what you're saying.

Speaker 3 (40:20):
You just don't know what the hell you're talking about.

Speaker 1 (40:23):
It is?

Speaker 3 (40:24):
Is the show? Well, here is what I'm determined to
be the dumbest story of the day. This guy says
that he was fired from the real life Conjuring House.

Speaker 4 (40:39):
Fired from the house.

Speaker 3 (40:40):
Yeah, like he worked at the house. I guess the
house has tours, Yeah, stuff like that. The house they
used for the movie The Conjuring got it. He was
fired because a ghost told the owner that he was stealing.
So the real life farmhouse from the movie. It is
in Burlville, Rhode Island, and it's open to visitors. This

(41:01):
guy he's been working there, and the owner claims the
spirit of John Arnold, who is the person who originally
owned the home back in the eighteen hundreds. Ah, so
the ghost of the original owner told this dude who
owns the house now that the employee had swiped three
thousand dollars from the cash box.

Speaker 4 (41:20):
Okay, then I think the employee does have a case here.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
The employee denies it and says he doesn't think that
John Arnold's ghost would rat him out like that quote.

Speaker 4 (41:30):
For a spirit to go after a staff.

Speaker 3 (41:32):
Member in that manner, I've never heard of such a
thing at any haunted venue, Little One, the Conjuring House,
And that, my friends, is the dumbest.

Speaker 4 (41:41):
Story of the day.

Speaker 3 (41:43):
Yeah.

Speaker 14 (41:45):
Where the money?

Speaker 4 (41:46):
Yeah, where the money at? I'm not saying he didn't
steal it. Where money exactly?

Speaker 3 (41:50):
Yeah, he's more worried about the method in which the
person was told. Right, the ghost told you.

Speaker 4 (41:57):
I don't think the spirit of John Arnold will do that.

Speaker 7 (42:00):
Yeah, we're friends.

Speaker 4 (42:01):
Hey, no rat Yeah, I know the money's gone, but
yeah it's not. That's not the reason why. Yeah, there's
so many people out there to be concerned with.

Speaker 3 (42:08):
Yeah, I'm looking up the house right now. It's a
lot smaller than you would think. Always looks at content though,
must be it always looked bigger on camera. I'm right, guys,
I know ten Acres what a letdown. Yeah, I would
like to go there. I didn't know you could tour it.

Speaker 4 (42:26):
Oh and then what then you're stuck in Rhode Island.
What else is there to do?

Speaker 3 (42:31):
I don't I guess a bunch of roads to drive on.
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (42:33):
Yeah, and it's an island of roads. Yeah, Rhode Island.

Speaker 3 (42:37):
You drive out, it's tiny eight seven seven forty four
Woody hit up of the text over to two to
nine eighty seven.

Speaker 4 (42:44):
Woody Show. He is a great h o abel.

Speaker 3 (42:53):
Garbage Day, not garbage here, Pete.

Speaker 1 (42:56):
Okay, don't forget.

Speaker 16 (42:58):
We have trash Day.

Speaker 3 (42:59):
Not trash.

Speaker 4 (43:00):
It's got every once in a while that they leave
it out for an extra day.

Speaker 1 (43:04):
It's the.

Speaker 4 (43:07):
Woody Show.

Speaker 3 (43:09):
Well, we've heard so much about Morgan's mom over the
years that Morgan has worked here on the show, and
she seems like a lot of fun. When we heard her,
she was out there doing morgasming Yeah with Uh with
the mom.

Speaker 4 (43:23):
They went to the Halloween store to give me tips
on the moone mem.

Speaker 2 (43:31):
Her mom.

Speaker 3 (43:31):
Her mom came out UH to dog sit while Morgan
went on that vacation with Cabo. When they first met,
and she's like you would think like a mom would
be like, oh, you're not going out of the country
this person you just met.

Speaker 4 (43:45):
No, it's like here go, I'll fly.

Speaker 7 (43:48):
Out, take care of the home, let me.

Speaker 4 (43:50):
Watch the dogs died on.

Speaker 3 (43:52):
I know, and your mom seems super cool.

Speaker 2 (43:54):
People wonder why I'm so weird and out there. It's
because I came out of her, you know, like we're
kind of one and the same.

Speaker 4 (44:00):
Yeah. Now, how is your dad? Your dad a character?

Speaker 7 (44:03):
Oh very much so.

Speaker 1 (44:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (44:04):
Like I saw like a picture on I think his
Father's Day you posted something. He looks like a like
a Texas dude. Yeah, dude's dude, you.

Speaker 7 (44:12):
Know, recycle car dude.

Speaker 2 (44:14):
We went to BUCkies last time I was home, and
we saw like the actual Bucky walking around the store.

Speaker 7 (44:20):
As apparently that's pretty rare.

Speaker 3 (44:22):
The bucket.

Speaker 7 (44:23):
He was running behind him, like trying to pull up
his tail and look at his butt.

Speaker 4 (44:28):
But your dad's a he's a mechanic, right, he's a
man's man.

Speaker 3 (44:31):
Yeah yeah, oh yeah, yeah, he's got permanent grease under
his nails. Yeah, that's stuff that the lava soup can't
even get out, you know. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (44:38):
Yeah, all right, So storytime with Morgan's mom.

Speaker 3 (44:41):
We were inspired because you know, Greg had a great
conversation with his dad that we played here on the
on the show where he was asking his dad about
all the time that he was disappointed. I'm like, so, Morgan, Man,
next time you see your mom, you got to talk
to your mom. I want to hear some of these stories.

Speaker 18 (44:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (44:56):
So my mom.

Speaker 7 (44:57):
I think she got a little nervous once I put
my you know, my in front of her.

Speaker 3 (45:00):
Your dad the same way.

Speaker 4 (45:01):
God, yes, before we even had the chat, we were
just rattling and rattling and then exactly hit recording and
I turned into an idiot.

Speaker 2 (45:09):
Right, And I'm like trying to get some good stories
out of her. So she was a little shy here.
But first thing I had to ask her. You asked
your dad, how do I disappoint you? I got to
ask her, how do I embarrass you?

Speaker 1 (45:19):
Oh?

Speaker 7 (45:19):
That's good mom.

Speaker 2 (45:20):
A lot of listeners they always text in like, oh,
your parents must be so proud of you, you know, sarcastically.

Speaker 7 (45:27):
Are you proud of me?

Speaker 11 (45:28):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (45:28):
My god, of course I'm proud of you. You're amazing.

Speaker 4 (45:31):
I didn't say that.

Speaker 1 (45:33):
When's the time that I embarrassed you the most? Would
you say the most?

Speaker 3 (45:37):
The most?

Speaker 1 (45:40):
You were young. I took you to work with me
and an environmental engineering office where I had some work
to do. And my boss was there in his office,
and you toddled your little butt in there and hit
under his desk and farted and farted and farted. You
never said a word, but I know he was choking.

Speaker 2 (46:00):
Have you heard my appearances on Guess Whose Gus?

Speaker 1 (46:04):
No?

Speaker 4 (46:04):
But I know whose guess it is?

Speaker 2 (46:07):
But do I embarrass you on like a day to
day basis in life?

Speaker 1 (46:11):
Absolutely? Dinner last night, Yeah, you told the waiter that.

Speaker 4 (46:18):
I was a chocolate whore. You Yeah, didn't you?

Speaker 9 (46:22):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (46:22):
I did.

Speaker 1 (46:22):
Okay, that was embarrassing. Absolutely, I'm sorry. I know I
know he was just sorry, But I am a chocolate.

Speaker 4 (46:29):
Whre shocked by that that your mom would you know,
find that embarrassing?

Speaker 7 (46:37):
I am, actually because that's I didn't remember I said that.

Speaker 8 (46:40):
That's just me, you know, talking.

Speaker 7 (46:42):
Talking ish, So yeah, it comes out all the time.

Speaker 4 (46:45):
Uh So then you know, I speaking of Guess Who's Guess?

Speaker 3 (46:48):
Here's a here's a couple of Morgan's uh submissions, the
ones we've already played. This is the Palti that was
stir fry, and then this is the kim chi cannon.
Remember the kim chi cannon. Yeah, this is from the
Korean barbecue.

Speaker 8 (47:05):
And oh yeah, that's not going to say that's juicy.

Speaker 4 (47:15):
That's a good one. Alright, story time with your mom.

Speaker 2 (47:17):
I've been to so trying to get some funny stories
out of her, right, and she actually ended up working
at a radio station when she was younger back in Colorado,
So I tried to get some stories out of her
with that. So what would you say your favorite segment
is of mine? Is it Moorgasms? Is it Bush or Bear?
Is it my butt chugging adventures? What makes you the

(47:38):
most proud? Do you have a favorite segment or do
you dislike them all?

Speaker 1 (47:45):
I don't dislike any of them. I do have more
favorites than others. I'm not too fond of watching you
butt chug when you know that's kind of interesting, But
I guess busher Bear is funny. So you used to
work in a radio station when you were younger. Did
anything crazy happen to you? Were you butt chugging in
the radio station? Oh goodness, no, So like the company

(48:08):
would hire you to voice commercials for them? Oh yes,
I can remember when Pj's pizza delicious steamy hot Pizza.
I can't remember the rest of it, but it was
a sexy It was a sexy had in my pjs.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
Oh okay, you helped up at the radio stations.

Speaker 8 (48:31):
Oh for sure, no disrespect to your mom. But she
in another life could be a phone sex operator.

Speaker 3 (48:37):
Really.

Speaker 7 (48:38):
Yeah, she has a good voice, she's got kind of well.
She smoked cigarettes for forever.

Speaker 1 (48:41):
Oh.

Speaker 7 (48:41):
I think that helped about a year ago.

Speaker 3 (48:43):
So she's got that raspy Yeah.

Speaker 4 (48:46):
This is Morgan's mom, Morgan sitting here and have a
little conversation story time with her.

Speaker 3 (48:50):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (48:51):
So again I couldn't really get some juicy stuff out
of her while I was recording, so I just decided
to ask her how she thought about you guys, so
she can get power ring.

Speaker 7 (49:00):
So we haven't had one of these in a while.

Speaker 4 (49:02):
They want to take a guess.

Speaker 3 (49:03):
What is the favorite or will be the favorite?

Speaker 4 (49:06):
Yeah, because you're you're tight with Menace and they do
the UFC stuff together.

Speaker 3 (49:11):
That's true, it's gotta be okay, that makes sense, all right?
So we medic will be first, and then then who
will be next?

Speaker 4 (49:17):
Greg?

Speaker 11 (49:18):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (49:18):
Maybe Wood, probably Greg.

Speaker 7 (49:20):
No, she hasn't met anyone but you.

Speaker 4 (49:24):
I'm gonna say Menace, Greg, then me, and then probably
Gina because she's you know, what are you trying to say?

Speaker 1 (49:34):
No?

Speaker 4 (49:34):
I think because like she hears her the most, she
hears the most from you know, I mean she might
not remember the whole cast. That's what. Yeah, that's that's
a lot of people. Let's see how it turns out.

Speaker 1 (49:46):
Give me your power ranking of the Woody Show. Oh
my goodness, I hate to do this. I'm gonna have
to say menas.

Speaker 3 (49:55):
Buddies.

Speaker 7 (49:55):
He loves Menace, all right, Menis is.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
Your number one. I'm gonna have to say Menace. He's
just funny, so funny, and so easy going. Gosh, I
love wood Woody's awesome. Okay, what is your number two?

Speaker 12 (50:08):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (50:08):
How about number three? Sammy?

Speaker 7 (50:11):
Sammy's your three?

Speaker 3 (50:13):
Yeah, I think so.

Speaker 1 (50:13):
Sammy's been around a while and I'm used to her.

Speaker 4 (50:16):
I like her.

Speaker 1 (50:17):
Greg. I love Greg. He's awesome, but I'm worried about him.
He was so skinny.

Speaker 4 (50:28):
Your MoMA's bad eyesight.

Speaker 2 (50:31):
Tell y'all, she has not heard a joke about that.
I didn't tell her to say that. Like, she's genuinely
worried about that.

Speaker 4 (50:38):
That's so nice, But I'm worried about him. He is
so skinny.

Speaker 1 (50:42):
Oh, he would love to hear you say that, mom,
really does he looks like he doesn't look healthy. He
looks ill.

Speaker 3 (50:52):
Dream Greg.

Speaker 4 (50:55):
Dream not aware of that's Greg told no, that's so good.

Speaker 7 (51:02):
That you're trying to look ill, dreams.

Speaker 18 (51:08):
Greg.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
He doesn't look healthy, he looks ill.

Speaker 4 (51:14):
He's gonna love that compliment.

Speaker 1 (51:15):
Okay, can you find out if he's okay?

Speaker 10 (51:18):
Greg?

Speaker 3 (51:18):
Gory?

Speaker 1 (51:18):
Are you okay, Gina?

Speaker 3 (51:21):
I'm adoring Gina. She's great.

Speaker 4 (51:23):
Okay, So Gena's your five?

Speaker 1 (51:25):
And then Sea Bass good, God, Sea best, Sea best,
Sea best.

Speaker 3 (51:28):
What can I say about you?

Speaker 2 (51:30):
Well, mom, be honest about how you truly feel about
Sea Bass.

Speaker 3 (51:33):
Yeah, nope, be honest.

Speaker 1 (51:38):
But I didn't even lie either, So can we just
in't it at that?

Speaker 4 (51:45):
That's about your mom? Kind of sounds like Jennifer.

Speaker 3 (51:48):
Coolidge Stiffler's mom. Yeah, I hear that, hear that? Yeah, alright, Well,
we love your mom. Your mom seems really fun, fun,
very nice. Come hang out with us.

Speaker 2 (51:58):
Sometimes I'm like, secretly record some story so we get.

Speaker 4 (52:02):
Some more show coming up for your next thing. Show
me right back.

Speaker 10 (52:09):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (52:09):
I had a screenshot of it in my head.

Speaker 4 (52:11):
Otherwise as a memory graphic man just.

Speaker 3 (52:14):
Before I add all these screenshots flashed before this is
the show. Get to the Redneck news here in a second.
Did I give you the birthday gift for your steps
Thank you so much? There. I had a little moment there.
I'm like, oh my god, did I bring that in?
Because my wife left it for me. She goes, Oh,
make sure you bring this in and give it the
Geena tomorrow. I got nice, all right, So what the

(52:35):
hell is it? Yeah, it's a birthday gift for her stepside.
Oh especially, that doesn't sound like a woody move to right, Yeah,
like his wait to know.

Speaker 4 (52:44):
No, No, that was really nice, not at all. But
then I couldn't remember if I actually brought it in.
You something right by the door, and then you get
to work and you're like, yeah, how did I take
up my left I have to start putting on in
front of the door, so I'll trip on it if.

Speaker 3 (52:58):
The door sometimes I'll I'll get here, leave in the
car something stupid like, Yeah, there was like a birthday
part of this weekend theme.

Speaker 8 (53:08):
The theme was Gina files a police report at the
birthday party. What that was the theme? It ended up
being the theme.

Speaker 4 (53:15):
Yeah, oh wait, but so it wasn't that was your house.

Speaker 8 (53:18):
No, it was like at a trampoline park.

Speaker 4 (53:20):
Oh that's right, that's called the cops.

Speaker 8 (53:23):
I had to file a police report. I wish the
cops came because the kids were messing around, having a
good time. And then my kid and his little friend
come like scraying out of the little like bouncy play
playground thing and they're like, leay Ley, because that's what
he calls me. Look what I found. And it was
an empty envelope with his name on it, with like
the card kind of ripped up from this from the

(53:45):
kid he was with, and no gift card to be found.
And so I'm like, how how did this happen? And
then I start gathering info, you know, I'm going to
full true crime mode. And then somebody, one of the
parents at the party says they saw a group of
like punk punk ass.

Speaker 4 (54:03):
Teens.

Speaker 8 (54:04):
Oh my god, these like little rascals milling around with you.
They're like stupid broccoli haircuts and like glasses. And then
they was there like a gift table. I guess, yes,
but we were told we were in a secured area.
Sus just put it on the table.

Speaker 3 (54:19):
Well, this other teenager, yeah, the The teens aren't supposed
to be up inside job.

Speaker 8 (54:25):
This is just for the kids. So I go to
our like helper and I go, this just happened, and
she's like legally fourteen. The girl that works there, like
she doesn't know what to do, and so I go, well,
there's a camera right here and a camera right here, like, kid.

Speaker 3 (54:39):
Is there footage? Can I go watch it?

Speaker 1 (54:41):
No?

Speaker 3 (54:41):
No, no, no, no no no no.

Speaker 8 (54:42):
I mean I'll go see if the managers can watch it.
I'm like, okay, well, you know, hurry it up, because
the teens are here and they're taking over the whole place.
The teens are messing with everybody. So they come back
like forty five minutes later. I'm like, so what did
we find and she goes, well, I didn't get to
watch it, but my manager watched it, and she said,
if you'd like to fill out a police report, they'll

(55:04):
hand over the footage.

Speaker 3 (55:05):
Are you gonna find these guys or you know, I
mean you got any promising uh leads.

Speaker 16 (55:12):
Or yeah, yeah, sure, yeah, I'll just check with a
voice don at the crime lad.

Speaker 3 (55:19):
Yeah, got four more detectives working.

Speaker 11 (55:21):
On the case.

Speaker 5 (55:22):
The gun is working in ships.

Speaker 4 (55:26):
Lead for your gift cards.

Speaker 8 (55:31):
Really, I'm gonna fill out a police report when I
could just like shake down the punk here. Now they
were so afraid I was going to like start like
kicking teenage ass, but they wouldn't point him out.

Speaker 3 (55:42):
I mean at that point, like why didn't bother with
the hassle of the police report over a gift card
from the kid's birthday party?

Speaker 4 (55:48):
Didn't take the whole table full of sat.

Speaker 8 (55:53):
Because I am down to ruin this kid's childhood, because
that's the thing. If it's me, ever, it's fine. If
it's my kid, I got all the time in the
world to launch and investigation.

Speaker 4 (56:06):
And your kid, it's the person who got the gift card.

Speaker 8 (56:08):
And that's okay. So the best part is the person
she was pissed too, the one who's who gave him
the gift card that's already been canceled, so they're not
going to be able to use it, which actually sucks.
You can do that apparently, Yeah, they called the store
if you have a gift re seat especially, but I'm
kind of mad about that because if they used it
then they'd be on for like fraud charge.

Speaker 3 (56:29):
They're never going to You're speaking as if they're never
going to figure this person investigate that.

Speaker 8 (56:33):
No, that is the problem. A police report for twenty
five dollars. You could have just pointed the kid out
so I would have taken care of it.

Speaker 3 (56:40):
And that's my point is that you're not going to
know who it is, like if you know if I'm saying,
if you had figured out who took it and then
you decided to present charge, I'm fully in support of that.
I'm say I'm fully in support of that. The idea
that it's in the wind. You're never going to figure
it out. And now I got to go through the
hassle filling out a please report for something. What a

(57:01):
waste of time.

Speaker 16 (57:02):
So see best, the only way to make them feel
the pain on this go to the news. Oh I'm
not kidding, little kid crap, protake your poor or something.

Speaker 4 (57:15):
Yeah, let them let them hand.

Speaker 8 (57:19):
Because that's the thing, is that a policy like this
happened on your property five minutes ago, and we're just
gonna let this go.

Speaker 4 (57:27):
Like that rage.

Speaker 3 (57:30):
I guarantee one of the local stations will pick this
up all over.

Speaker 8 (57:33):
Well I know what I'm doing this afternoon, well in
front of the business, will hate to they just allow
that right here, because that's the thing. It's not about
the money, it's that we were you're gonna steal from
my kid. Oh now I'm taking my earrings off, like
I'm taking.

Speaker 4 (57:48):
My shoes out.

Speaker 3 (57:51):
This is ethical.

Speaker 16 (57:52):
But maybe if you have a like, if you know
somebody as a kid who's got like some an issue
or something, have them as a kid.

Speaker 3 (57:58):
The mountain wheelchairs, you should have like these young pu
the brother from something about Mary. Yeah, perfect, but you
should have handled this like we handled it.

Speaker 4 (58:08):
When I worked at the cell phone store, this teenager
grabbed one of the employee's cell phones and put it
in his pocket and we started We noticed it was missing,
so we started calling it and it was ringing, and
the guys, I don't know what it is.

Speaker 3 (58:21):
I don't know what it is.

Speaker 4 (58:22):
So we said, basically, dude, just hand it over the
phone or you're gonna walk outside and we're gonna beat
your ass.

Speaker 9 (58:27):
Right, and the kid you have, yeah, choices, And then
the kid that he got scared and handed.

Speaker 8 (58:33):
The phone over that it would have been great, but
there were so many young punk teens there with broccoli cuts.
They are the same because they only took over like
the basketball are special to the kids out because.

Speaker 3 (58:45):
There's like can be if like you're all hanging out
at the trampoline, that's a great question.

Speaker 8 (58:49):
But they're all like fifteen to seventeen years old. There's
you know, there's different sections. There's like the bouncy house,
you know, the ballpit whatever, and they all took over
the kub upstairs.

Speaker 4 (58:58):
What was the gift card?

Speaker 8 (59:00):
It was Target, Target high ticket. Yeah, to a ten
year old is a big deal. So I will keep
you posted because you know I love some true crime.

Speaker 4 (59:11):
What a stupid policy. I can't show you the video.

Speaker 8 (59:16):
I'm here now, I can take care of this.

Speaker 3 (59:18):
Now, that's not that's not a policy. That's say I
don't want things escalate.

Speaker 2 (59:21):
Yeah.

Speaker 8 (59:22):
Yeah, everyone that worked there was like sixteen.

Speaker 4 (59:24):
Yeah, you'll see who it is and then you'll confront that.

Speaker 8 (59:27):
And there must be some great and powerful as in
the back, because every person that came up to me
was like, well I didn't see it, but I was
told by my manager.

Speaker 3 (59:35):
I'm like, well bring out this MESSI.

Speaker 4 (59:36):
We can't security team monitoring all the cameras in the back.
Nobody talks to the manager.

Speaker 3 (59:41):
You have to have to bob in exactly yeah, only
after passing a background check.

Speaker 4 (59:46):
Though, can you go into the security room at the
trampoline party?

Speaker 8 (59:49):
And by the way, this party wasn't free. These are
price horse gathering any of you.

Speaker 4 (59:55):
Kind of kid party places are a ripoff.

Speaker 8 (59:57):
So at the very least, maybe give me twenty five bucks.

Speaker 4 (59:59):
All right, time for a brand new redneck news.

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
So wood you show if you paid for your honeymoon
with marble Mouth. That's ritt Nick News and today's redneck news.
It's from Memphis, Tennessee. Where he got this fifty one
year old fellow who got into a verbal dispute with
his old lady. According to the report, she told him
that she was fixing to leave him. Wow, he didn't

(01:00:24):
like that. So they're arguing like happy couples do. Things escalated,
at which point the soon to be ex wife decided
that she had had enough, but that she tried to
walk out. He stopped her. He blocked the door. They
argued even more, and at some point he shot her
in the belly and he told her, I told you
stopped playing with me. But now he knew. He was like,

(01:00:46):
now I gotta get you some help on of you know,
shooting her yeah. So he got her into the car,
and like the gentleman he is, he drove her to
the hospital himself.

Speaker 8 (01:00:55):
Oh what a nice guy.

Speaker 3 (01:00:57):
However, he decided to make one quick little stop on
the way to get some beer. No, yea, he knows
he might be outside the lawn also like uh, emergency rooms,
never quick, you know, you might go out and have
a couple of car bears. His old lady eventually made

(01:01:18):
it to the hospital, told them all about how she
ended up with a new hole in her body. The cops,
they were called their rest of the husband. He tried
to tell him that he didn't mean to shoot her,
that the gun quote just kind of went on. That's
the thing too. So he's been charged with domestic assault,
second degree attempted murder, and because he already had a record,
he was also charged as a felon in possession of

(01:01:38):
a firearms. It was good times. They're in Memphis, Tennessee,
where a fella shot his wife and then stopped for
beer on the way to the hospital.

Speaker 4 (01:01:48):
And that is today he's raid Nick one quick erring.

Speaker 3 (01:01:55):
Yeah, hey man, we're gonna stop off here quick, Yeah,
right quick. We got more woody show next hang Ony Show.

Speaker 4 (01:02:06):
My complexion is that of a urinal urinal.

Speaker 8 (01:02:09):
Everyone in this room means vitamin deep, A little lower,
a little slower.

Speaker 3 (01:02:12):
You have oils down, sunning their buttholes.

Speaker 8 (01:02:14):
Wow, but chucking the sun not pretty much?

Speaker 3 (01:02:17):
All deficient. Indeed, sorry, I'm little cel.

Speaker 10 (01:02:20):
Are you down the d or not give it to me?

Speaker 11 (01:02:23):
All day long?

Speaker 4 (01:02:26):
The Woody Show.

Speaker 3 (01:02:28):
So, Gina was telling the story about how for her
step son's birthday party, they had a trampoline place and
at some point some no good team stole one of
the birthday cards with a gift card to target inside
of it, and it was now missing.

Speaker 4 (01:02:43):
The torn, empty envelope was found, so evidence, you gotta
get this disposed.

Speaker 3 (01:02:49):
Yeah, and Gina filody police report because the trampoline place
would not give her any information about what was seen
on video, because there are video cameras all over those
places everywhere. Yeah, now you would be interested. I'm sure
to hear that. Over in New Jersey there's one local
town who are taking their problem with bad kids to
a new level because they have passed a law that

(01:03:11):
holds parents legally responsible if their kid under eighteen breaks
the law.

Speaker 4 (01:03:16):
Love it sweet.

Speaker 3 (01:03:17):
Now, as a parent, I hate it because you know,
here's the thing they have. People always like to say, well,
you got to you got to blame the parents. Well, no,
there are plenty of people who are really good parents,
and you teach your kids right and wrong, and they
still make dumb decisions because their brain is half baked, true,
and they want to be like their friends, they make
they make dumb decisions, peer pressure things like that. That's

(01:03:37):
the whole point of you know, when you're a kid,
you make poor decisions and you learn from your hopefully
learn from your mistakes. But uh, I mean they've done
this in some extreme cases where shooting someone's like a
shooter and they got the you know, it was a
gift from their this gun was a gift from their dad,
or you know, the parents didn't keep the guns locked
up in the house. And think that I understand, right,

(01:03:59):
But on some of these other things, it's like if
the parents got picked up because their kids stole Gena's
gift card. Hang them high. Yeah, anyway, Parents who fail
to stop their kids from committing a crime could face
up to ninety days in jail in the two thousand
dollars fine. And this law is after a brawl broke
out between some no good teens and some young adults
last year. They left three cops with minor injuries, and

(01:04:21):
the local politicians and stuff say that the goal of
the law is simple to keep kids accountable and make
sure their parents step up.

Speaker 8 (01:04:28):
But how can you prove that the parents knew about it?

Speaker 4 (01:04:31):
It's a great question.

Speaker 16 (01:04:32):
Something tells me this they only this is only to
get whipped out when it's a habitual offender. When you're like,
this is the fifth time we brought this kid in.

Speaker 3 (01:04:38):
You the kids always in the streets at eleven o'clock
at night, it's ten o'clock.

Speaker 4 (01:04:42):
Do you know where your children are?

Speaker 2 (01:04:43):
No?

Speaker 4 (01:04:43):
No, No, I mean one time.

Speaker 3 (01:04:45):
Yeah, the kid's being an idiot five times no.

Speaker 11 (01:04:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:04:48):
And if you're in a brawl, you know that's a
certain type of kid.

Speaker 2 (01:04:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 9 (01:04:54):
They just don't find the one thing that the kid
actually cares about and loves and then just starting to
take it away. What if it's brawling, Yeah yeah, what
if they really love to fight?

Speaker 15 (01:05:02):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (01:05:02):
Actingly, my good.

Speaker 3 (01:05:04):
Teens, what they love is being no good teens. That's
what they love. They love, they love, they love if
they live side the street car side show beating up.
They've beaten up people if they're bigger kids. Vandalism, drinking forties,
that's what they love.

Speaker 8 (01:05:19):
Yeah, no, good teens, that's right.

Speaker 4 (01:05:21):
Eight seven seven forty four. Woody text us over to
two two nine eight seven.

Speaker 3 (01:05:27):
Right back. This is the Woody Show. Boom into another
new hour, insensitivity training frame, politically correct World. Thank you
for being here giving us some of your valuable time
this morning. I'm Woodie. That's Greg Gory. It's like, oh,
there's like menace white. Hi, we got the sea bask

(01:05:50):
h they're Sammy phones are opening eight seven to seven
forty four. Woody hit us up text two two nine
eight seven. So I have that thought about a topic
that we can do like a last man standing. This
is one of those where we open up the phones
and we take your calls, and then we hear your story,

(01:06:12):
and then we take another call. We hear that story,
we decide which is the better one that one moves
on at the end of the segment. Whichever story is
left is the one that ends up winning a prize.
And the topic I'll tell you why here in a second.
The dumbest thing you've ever done on a dare good one.
What's the dumbest thing you've ever done on a dare?

(01:06:35):
Some people have done something dumbest thing you've done on
a dare?

Speaker 4 (01:06:39):
Think about it.

Speaker 3 (01:06:39):
You don't got to call in just yet. We'll be
taking your calls on that Last Man Standing. Best one
will win a prize. Eight seven seven forty four, Woodie.
Hit us up with your text to be a part
of the show, or send us an email email at
the woodieshow dot com. Social media of course, you can
find us on a social media platform of your choice.
Just search for us at the Woody Show. Right back,

(01:07:07):
Last Man Standing. Here's the way it works. We've got
the phones open right now at eight seven seven forty
four Woody. If you get a busy signal, give it
a second try back, because we're going through the phones
as quickly as account trying to get to as many
stories as we can. We're gonna hear out one person story,
then the second person story. Between those two one we'll

(01:07:27):
move on and at the end of the segment, whichever
wants to get king of the Hill thing, whicheveryone's left
at the end will be a winner and we'll win
a prize. The topic for this round of last man
standing and we're thinking about this after you know, Morgan
agree to get this tattoo in our pubis so regredible.
What's the dumbest thing you've done on a dare? What's

(01:07:49):
the dumbest thing you've done on a dare? Eight seven
seven forty four Woody is the number will go right
to the phones. So let's say hello to uh Doug deerg.

Speaker 18 (01:07:59):
Dodd.

Speaker 4 (01:08:00):
What's up, Doug?

Speaker 12 (01:08:01):
How are you?

Speaker 3 (01:08:02):
What's up? All right? So you you're the first caller?
Topic again. What's the dumbest thing you've done on a dare?

Speaker 1 (01:08:10):
Was?

Speaker 10 (01:08:10):
I was going to school down in San Diego. A
bunch of friends of ours went down to San Felipa
and Mexico to have a party for the weekend. At
the end of the party, there was a scare to
get up on the motor home before we went home
and have some tequila shots. Well, it moved on from
there and the driver wanted to get going, and we
decided not to get down and stayed on top of

(01:08:33):
the motor home in at beach chair for two hours
while driving back to San Diego the border, passing tequila
shots back and forth with a few buddies on top,
stood up to pass my bottle of tequila to my friend.
My beach chair flew away. My buddy in the back
caught it in midair and handed it back to me,

(01:08:54):
and we sat down and kept going, huh, dumbest thing.

Speaker 4 (01:08:58):
And nobody got hurt. Next war, pulled over or nothing?

Speaker 10 (01:09:00):
Team will, no casualties, no pullovers. There for two hours,
got a cam pass and fifty five miles an hour.

Speaker 3 (01:09:08):
All right, well, there's there's dirt story. All right.

Speaker 4 (01:09:14):
Hold on one second, man, We'll move on to the
second call here.

Speaker 3 (01:09:17):
Let's go to John. Good morning, John, Hey John, John, John,
Hi John. All right, so last man standing, what's the
dumbest thing you've done on a dare?

Speaker 11 (01:09:25):
The dumbest thing I did down the dare is back
in the high So I have a bunch of buddies.
That's some video cameras. They dared me to run through
our local shopping mall completely butt naked, nothing but a
Paris box on paras and a latex Jean Simmons mats.
Stopped in the set part, did a little did a
little jig, and took off, running right out in the
backyard to hop in a car.

Speaker 3 (01:09:45):
And oh, never got caught. No, never, that's a lot
of penis confidence. I know, I admire that. Greg and
I are both of like, wow, this guy that's so cool.
Streaking used to be just fun, I know.

Speaker 4 (01:09:59):
I all right, And when you throw in socks in
a Jean Simmons mask, it's hilarious.

Speaker 11 (01:10:05):
John.

Speaker 4 (01:10:06):
I know we're all wondering, are you well, hung man,
we're all wondering.

Speaker 11 (01:10:10):
I'm definitely a grower, not a.

Speaker 3 (01:10:12):
Showy grower, not a show That's why he wore the
mask kidding.

Speaker 11 (01:10:18):
Them.

Speaker 4 (01:10:19):
Yeah, all right, John, hang on one second, whose story
do we like? I'm gonna vote for John? Yeah, John,
I appreciate the prank nature of it. Yeah, fine, Okay,
the first one is just cool.

Speaker 3 (01:10:32):
Number one is not really a dare. Yeah, I mean
I would do that one. I wouldn't do the streaking one. Okay,
So we're all in agreement, John, John, all right, Thanks, Doug,
appreciate you man, Thanks for listening the Wood Show.

Speaker 4 (01:10:44):
All right, John, hang on, you're still in it. Let's
go to Kelly.

Speaker 3 (01:10:47):
Good morning, Kelly morning. All right, last man standing, what's
the dumbest thing you've done on a dare?

Speaker 5 (01:10:54):
Oh my god, me and my brother were little, and
he dared me to drink soda that was an refrigerator,
knowing that I don't like soda. But he dared me,
and I did it, and it turned out to be
his pee and it all out.

Speaker 4 (01:11:10):
Now that's some sibling stuff right there.

Speaker 18 (01:11:13):
That's more we have sibling wars.

Speaker 3 (01:11:16):
But he told her it was an old soda, which
is I guess how he got around it being open.
Uh huh, Yeah, dare darey drink this old soda turned
out to be his peace. So it's a dare and
a prank at the same time, dude. At the same
time that happened.

Speaker 9 (01:11:31):
In high school with a group of friends of mine,
we had a guy named his nickname is man Dick
and dude he did the same thing.

Speaker 3 (01:11:40):
Yeah, yeah, because they thought it was mountain dude.

Speaker 4 (01:11:42):
Oh my god, same here, man. What in school told
the kid this local bully said, hey, Jimmy, drink this
mountain dew and it was pete.

Speaker 3 (01:11:51):
Really apparently this is a comedy.

Speaker 9 (01:11:54):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:11:56):
I took a sip out of a dip cup once.
That was a while on purpose was because I was
sitting there, and yeah, I grabbed the wrong thing.

Speaker 4 (01:12:03):
Oh, God, Yeah, that was foul. So what would you
rather drink?

Speaker 11 (01:12:08):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:12:09):
In a way, I'd almost rather pee. It's gonna be.

Speaker 4 (01:12:12):
Cleaner, right, interesting?

Speaker 10 (01:12:17):
All right?

Speaker 4 (01:12:17):
So whose story?

Speaker 3 (01:12:19):
John running through the mall butt naked or Kelly who
drank her brothers quote old soda.

Speaker 4 (01:12:25):
I'm totally over analyzing this, but I'm still sticking with
John because Kelly's was a dare to do something that
if it was a soda, not a big deal. There.

Speaker 3 (01:12:34):
Yeah, that's not a dare. It was a prank exactly.

Speaker 4 (01:12:36):
Okay, Well I was gonna vote for Kelly's. Everybody on John.
All right, Kelly, thank you for calling Kelly. Yeah, yeah,
you set your mouth on fire.

Speaker 3 (01:12:47):
I'm assuming.

Speaker 4 (01:12:49):
Let's see.

Speaker 3 (01:12:49):
Let's go to uh Ben, Hey, good morning, Ben, Ben,
good morning?

Speaker 4 (01:12:55):
All right? So, last man standing, what's the dumbest thing
you've done on a dare?

Speaker 15 (01:13:00):
Everything starts when you're drunk, now, No, absolutely, not on
at work?

Speaker 4 (01:13:08):
Okay, that means.

Speaker 15 (01:13:11):
Everything bad, I guess in my life. Long story short,
in high school at a party, big party, lots of
cars in the parking lot, guy ends up eating a
tequila worm.

Speaker 11 (01:13:25):
That guy was so passed out.

Speaker 15 (01:13:28):
Somebody dares me to jump up on his car, do
a dance, put some dance in the hood, which I
gladly did. Like, oh you dare me to do this,
I will show you how drunk and stupid I can be.

Speaker 11 (01:13:47):
Car.

Speaker 15 (01:13:48):
Oh yeah, he didn't deserve it at all either.

Speaker 3 (01:13:50):
Like, is that why you became an alcoholic?

Speaker 4 (01:13:53):
Because is that why you're drunk right now?

Speaker 3 (01:14:00):
Work every second?

Speaker 4 (01:14:01):
Yeah?

Speaker 15 (01:14:01):
Can I tell you that I actually was an alcoholic
but being recovered for ten years?

Speaker 11 (01:14:09):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:14:09):
Look, we have no side effects.

Speaker 10 (01:14:11):
I'm not don't know, we weren't.

Speaker 4 (01:14:15):
All right, let's see Ben's story or John story.

Speaker 15 (01:14:19):
That's just kind of stupid. Like I said, I'm sorry, I.

Speaker 3 (01:14:24):
Can hear, yeah, it's feel bad about it.

Speaker 4 (01:14:26):
I get it. I can hear the regret and the
alcohol in your broath.

Speaker 11 (01:14:29):
Just let it go.

Speaker 3 (01:14:31):
I'm kidding. I'm kidding him. It's jokes man, jokes. It's
just all right. So, uh, what do you think Greg?
Whose story? I'm still sticking with John streaking on the
story minute?

Speaker 4 (01:14:44):
Yeah, through the mall because Ben was just being as
much of a there' hey go go don't.

Speaker 3 (01:14:50):
It wasn't dangerous to him. That just may be a dick, Okay,
all right, Ben, thank you for the call, appreciated, Thanks
for being a good sport. Let it go, Ben, he resolve.
All right, thanks man.

Speaker 4 (01:15:01):
Let's go to uh Travis say good morning, Travis, good morning,
good morning, good morning. All right, So what's the what's
the dumbest thing you've done on a dare?

Speaker 18 (01:15:10):
I've done quite a few. Had time to think about
it listening to the others. So one of the ones
I could think of the dumbest there I did. I
believe I was in the fifth grade. I was known
as probably one of the class clowns. So it was
after lunch. I was after lunch and a couple of
friends are like, I dare you to make a scene
in the class after lunch. I'm like, okay, so thinking

(01:15:31):
about it, thinking about it, we go to class. We
sit down about five minutes in and the teachers like,
this is a time when it woulden desk.

Speaker 10 (01:15:40):
You know, you could open it.

Speaker 18 (01:15:41):
And close it.

Speaker 4 (01:15:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 18 (01:15:46):
So the teacher was like, what's that smell? Why does
the smell like smoke? And everybody's quiet. I'm sitting quiet,
and you know a couple of seconds passed by, you
see smoke coming out of my desk.

Speaker 10 (01:15:58):
So he obviously sees it.

Speaker 18 (01:16:00):
He comes opens up my desk, flame just comes bursting
out of the desk, Sprinklings go off everywhere everybody the classroom, and.

Speaker 3 (01:16:10):
How much trouble you get?

Speaker 18 (01:16:13):
I got suspend it for a couple of days.

Speaker 3 (01:16:15):
I'm sure you did.

Speaker 4 (01:16:15):
What did you do to create this?

Speaker 18 (01:16:18):
I set my homework on fire?

Speaker 3 (01:16:19):
Okay, there we go. All right, Okay, so somebody dared
you too, and you went straight to fire. That's beyond yeah, yeah,
all right, really taking the there serious sea best will
start with you. This is this is actually tough because

(01:16:40):
that's good.

Speaker 16 (01:16:40):
That's good, and it's very it's not smart, but it's
very risk and it's very impressive.

Speaker 3 (01:16:45):
Yes, I'm still going with the streaking because it's just
such a classic look. Okay, and penises and penises and
hilarious Sammy.

Speaker 14 (01:16:54):
I'm going with Travis the fire starter.

Speaker 3 (01:16:56):
Yeah, menace.

Speaker 9 (01:16:57):
Yeah, I mean the fire starting is pretty extreme, but
I'm going with the hilarity of the wiener and the
kiss mask.

Speaker 3 (01:17:04):
Okay, Greg Gory, Yeah, this is tough because this is
quite a scene. I think the scarier, riskier one is fire.
So we have a tie would and.

Speaker 4 (01:17:17):
There's there's no way you're getting away with that either. Yeah,
because it's your desk. Yeah, it's such a risk. Yeah,
I'm going fire.

Speaker 3 (01:17:25):
Should ask did you have a lighter with? Like, how
did you how did you set the homework on fire?

Speaker 11 (01:17:30):
Yes?

Speaker 18 (01:17:30):
I did have a lighter.

Speaker 3 (01:17:32):
I was supposed to hit the.

Speaker 16 (01:17:35):
Light.

Speaker 4 (01:17:37):
I thought it was a big deal. Just get your
hands on matches at.

Speaker 3 (01:17:39):
That age, like there was a danger, but not just
danger for it was just danger for himself that'd be
one thing, but danger for the entire class, for the
building and everything like.

Speaker 4 (01:17:48):
So and potentially having to like redo the class.

Speaker 3 (01:17:50):
I'm gonna go with the ones a little bit more
silly and only really you know, something that would be
a consequence to that person.

Speaker 4 (01:17:56):
So I think I'm gonna go with John on that.
It's tough. Yeah, that's a tough Travis.

Speaker 3 (01:18:00):
Thank you for the call.

Speaker 4 (01:18:01):
Thanks, I appreciate the call. Story.

Speaker 3 (01:18:05):
Let's go to Sammy. Good morning, Sammy, Sammy, good morning,
good morning. All right, So what's the dumbest thing he's
done on a dare?

Speaker 6 (01:18:12):
Let me start off by saying, my sister is meaner
than all four of my brothers put together. So eight
years old and playing truth or dare with her, and
my dumb ass says, dare. So she makes me lick
the bottom of my shoes from beginning. Oh who knows
where those shoes been?

Speaker 3 (01:18:29):
Yeah, that reminds me. One time we were doing like
this event at a dive bar and Menace licked a
stripper pole from the very bottom of it to his
high up on that stripper pole as his tongue could
reach while standing. I like to entertain listeners my back
and he was saying like, because he was like.

Speaker 4 (01:18:44):
I don't get sick ever, Yeah, that's why I here
licked this dirty strip he did. Yeah, I love doing it.

Speaker 3 (01:18:49):
And then guess what happened. I was after eating the tissues,
he got sick. Yeah, yeah, the pole is fine. Okay, Yeah,
there were some snotty tissues from another coworker and he
ate those and then he got sick and he enjoyed
that too. All right, So Sammy or John, what do
we think for entertainment purposes? It's a good dare.

Speaker 4 (01:19:07):
I like that one. Look at the bottom of your shoes.

Speaker 3 (01:19:09):
Yeah she didn't top the bottom. I'm gonna stick with streaker, streaker.

Speaker 15 (01:19:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:19:16):
Yeah, licking of the shoes is not even shocking anymore
of these days.

Speaker 3 (01:19:20):
Okay, he's a speakers, more people are involved, bigger.

Speaker 4 (01:19:23):
Audience, yes, yeah, yes, okay, all right, well Sammy, thank
you very much there for the call.

Speaker 3 (01:19:28):
Appreciate you listening. Well, ladies and gentlemen. That is all
the time we have. So I do believe we have
a winner, and that would be John. John.

Speaker 4 (01:19:36):
Congratulations.

Speaker 11 (01:19:37):
Oh yeah, you are the.

Speaker 4 (01:19:39):
Winner of this round of Last man Standing.

Speaker 10 (01:19:43):
Awesome.

Speaker 3 (01:19:44):
Congratulations and as part of your reward, Greg's going to
recreate your prank. Yeah, right now, right now. Yeah, he's
on the hall of work. He's a grower, not a shower,
right Greg, Guys, that is correct. Yeah, all right, well John,
hang on second, we'll get all your information. Thank you
so much for listening to the Woody Show. Everybody else
was who was on hold already. I'm sorry, we just
simply ran out of time. We got to take a break.

(01:20:06):
More wood He shows next. Hang on, we'll.

Speaker 18 (01:20:20):
All right.

Speaker 3 (01:20:20):
Some uh other people that were texting over couldn't call
in for our last man standing. Dumbest thing you did
on a dare? This one says I was trying to
impress these two girls in a pool, and I dared them.

Speaker 4 (01:20:33):
To kiss each other, which they did.

Speaker 3 (01:20:36):
Yeah, all right, yeah, But then they dared me to
streak around the apartment complex that we were, where the
pool was, where we were swimming.

Speaker 4 (01:20:45):
I did it. When I came back, they were gone
and so were my clothes. Oh no.

Speaker 3 (01:20:50):
Mistake, nightmare can't call. But I was there when I
was a kid to get someone to eat animal poop.
So I took a Tutsi roll, ate the actual Tutsi roll,
and then replace the tutsie roll with the poop.

Speaker 4 (01:21:01):
And gave it to another kid.

Speaker 3 (01:21:05):
As a kid, I was there to lick the floor
of the boy's bathroom and I actually did it. Let's see,
Dumbest dare involves a lighter and a game of Chicken.
Ended up with a burn scar on my palm, a
melted pen scar on one wrist, and a cigarette burn
scar on the other.

Speaker 4 (01:21:25):
Just a fun story.

Speaker 3 (01:21:26):
How my brother dared me to jump out of our
second floor window so he would rent me a WWE
video game. I landed in a hole, snapped my ankle
basically in half. I had to crawl around the house
crying for my family to find me. I did get
the game, though I'm not going to call on this one.

(01:21:51):
But my dumbest are was I put a fart bomb
in a church seat during service.

Speaker 4 (01:21:56):
Yea at bomb, that's a place stink bomb. Yeah, you
gotta really love Jesus to hang in there. Yeah you
can find those anyway.

Speaker 3 (01:22:06):
Thank you for your calls and for your stories. If
you're just tuning in and you missed it, you just
go back on the podcast. Hit us up any day
that you missed any part of the show on our website,
which is The Woodies Show dot com and click today's
podcast dumbest dares around the room? Can anybody remember one?

Speaker 9 (01:22:23):
I mean for work I did. I snorted hot sauce,
like the hottest hot sauce, I know, star bleeding. I
think I did do a streak from like a.

Speaker 3 (01:22:33):
Ballparking back, like, oh wait, what is okay? The one
day pre being extremely fat and pre this show. Yeah,
working on this show. He was working on a different
morning show years and years ago. Didn't somebody dare you
to fish a turd out of the toilet with your
bare hands and bring it to the boss's office.

Speaker 4 (01:22:49):
Yeah I did that.

Speaker 3 (01:22:50):
Yeah, there's so much stuff that I did that I
don't even remember. I didn't know you did it.

Speaker 4 (01:22:54):
He was a human toilet stink. I didn't know a streak.

Speaker 3 (01:22:57):
Yeah I did that.

Speaker 4 (01:22:58):
That sounds mortifying for you. I know, flying boxing and
fought two other guys. That was cool. Anything you've done
in a dare sea bass, Yeah.

Speaker 16 (01:23:06):
A lot of stuff I think I may have told
you about. I was at a Steve O live show.
This is back when he was still doing drugs, and
he dared every good old days did exactly. He dared
someone of the audience to punch himself in the face.
So they bled and I did that, no problem, and
then we did something. A lot of other stuff was
more just like being stupid. Yeah, like fire, like Roman

(01:23:27):
candle wars, like shirtless. Yeah, it's not really a dare,
just like let's do this. Yeah I did that. I
I had scars on my chest all summer because it
was you take a dozen Roman candle shots to your chest,
that will happen.

Speaker 4 (01:23:38):
Sure, Hell yeah dog.

Speaker 3 (01:23:40):
I mean my dare was the working at the fast
food establishment and I had to swear to customer because
I was working the drive through. I've told that story before.

Speaker 4 (01:23:49):
That was my well.

Speaker 3 (01:23:50):
He ended up being a car full of a woman
in a car full of kids and he couldn't apologize.
There was some money on the line. Well, dared to
do if you do it? Well, you know everybody was
chipping in, all the guys of the grower chipping in.
So that's more than I made on any other day,
a single day or work. It's like Greg said, when well,
you were dared to drink cigarette but water. Yeah, so

(01:24:10):
there was a bottle of water that there were some
cigarettes put out in. You know people will do that. Yeah,
and we dared Greg to drink it and he did
sixty bucks. Yeah he did for money, but it's still yeah,
I did it from Yeah, for money. I love menaces
foot in my mouth. Yeah, we had, we had. The
guy was just doing it for a video game rental.
A right, if you're doing it for money, it's even

(01:24:33):
it's a reward, YEA. Something tells me that the Sammy
has at least one story, or at the very least
she seems because you know that whole like, oh my god,
we were cheerleaders.

Speaker 4 (01:24:43):
Like mean girl.

Speaker 3 (01:24:46):
She's the one that dared some sucker, some nerds, some losers,
some less popular, some less mean girl stuff.

Speaker 4 (01:24:53):
Yeah, she went to some loser and tried to make
her pop.

Speaker 3 (01:24:56):
She's smiling, so you know it's true.

Speaker 14 (01:24:58):
The thing is is that I'm sure I didn't. I
just can't remember.

Speaker 4 (01:25:00):
Yeah, it was like every day, did you ever do
a dare?

Speaker 15 (01:25:06):
I did?

Speaker 13 (01:25:08):
They were doing the boys were doing like a fight
night when I was a freshman in high school and
they were all boxing each other, and they dared me
and one of my friends.

Speaker 14 (01:25:15):
To box each other, which we did, but.

Speaker 13 (01:25:19):
She was much taller than me and I never had
a chance, Like it was really stupid for me to
go like.

Speaker 14 (01:25:24):
Oh yeah, okay on a dare.

Speaker 13 (01:25:26):
And I had braces at the time, and she just
towered over me and I every single round ended because
I blacked out and had to get so much and
tore up the whole inside of my mouth and I embraces.

Speaker 3 (01:25:40):
It was the freshman year boxing thing. Now here we
are explain some things, some brain damage. There a lot
of times to thanks for all your stories, Thank you
for your text messages.

Speaker 4 (01:25:50):
We're gonna take a quick break more Wood.

Speaker 3 (01:25:53):
He shows next hang On show