Elftastrophe

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Mojo in the morning show. The phone numbers eight four
four Mojo Live. The text is nine five five zero zero.
Shannon had something crazy happen at her house yesterday.

Speaker 2 (00:13):
You call it an elf tastrophe, an elf emergency.

Speaker 3 (00:16):
Oh my god, you got to label that, by the way,
as the title, Zach is there an elf hospital.

Speaker 4 (00:20):
Well, let me tell you Anna, So we have three
elves in our house. Okay, we have Rice Krispy Tree,
the og that came for Lucy when she was three
years old. We have candy Cane sprinkles, and then Wes
and his kids have Freddy. So Freddy is now a
part of our crew. Plus three elf pets. So it
is a it is. The elves are busy in our

(00:42):
house every single night. And so earlier in the week,
the elves were, you know, up to their mischief and
they were digging through our couch cushions, and so there
was stuff. Their little butts were sticking up from you know,
the couch cushions. Their heads were down there, and there
was all sorts of stuff that they brought up, like
money and legos and old food and NRF gun.

Speaker 2 (01:06):
Bullets and all the things.

Speaker 4 (01:08):
So that that was what they got into well, my
naughty but very cute dog. Bow decided that he was
hungry and he felt like elf for breakfast, and so
he ate the elves that had created a scene on
the couch. He ate he ate the two girl elves.

(01:30):
Freddy was elsewhere.

Speaker 3 (01:31):
Yeah, I mean I'd eat some candy cane sprinkles. Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:34):
So they were in really, really, really bad shape. And
any parent knows you are not allowed to touch the
elves or they lose their magic and they cannot go
back to the north pole at night and tell Sannah
you know about the behavior in the house that day.
So Smith, my eight year old, was just in full
panic mode when he got home and saw the elves

(01:55):
had been eaten by the damn dog. So he started
praying over them. Actually have a video of it. He
started praying over them, and then we had to perform
surgery with kitchen tongs and oven mits to put them
back together and clean them up. And then he told
me that he had seen somewhere that if you sprinkle

(02:15):
them with cinnamon, you you, they can get their magic.
I don't have kids yet.

Speaker 3 (02:29):
Elfloor okay, fathers.

Speaker 5 (02:39):
Sprinkling okay, yeah, yeah, and then maybe yeah, but I
don't want it to stem their outfits when they go
back to the North and Santa's going to be like,
what the heck.

Speaker 6 (03:00):
Are you?

Speaker 2 (03:01):
Did you make this up?

Speaker 7 (03:02):
No, I swear to do this.

Speaker 2 (03:05):
Okay, I'm gonna guys.

Speaker 3 (03:09):
Got his face.

Speaker 2 (03:10):
I swear he made this up. They're still in every
search it up didn't work.

Speaker 4 (03:16):
Yep, they are. They look great. They went back to
see Sannah.

Speaker 3 (03:20):
We got as well. We gotta post that video.

Speaker 2 (03:23):
That is no, we are, We're we can post it
on the story, but you're not posting it.

Speaker 5 (03:27):
Why not?

Speaker 3 (03:28):
Why?

Speaker 8 (03:28):
I look like holy hell in that videos. I have
no makeup on, I have all my face creams and
my skin is sagging to the floor. No wait, you
can post Hannah story so it disappears after twenty four hours, Bianca,
and that is it.

Speaker 3 (03:44):
Everyone's gonna see it anyways.

Speaker 2 (03:45):
If we four hours on the story on my face, if.

Speaker 9 (03:50):
We sprinkle cinnamon on those cheeks where they lived in
Heaven's self conscious a whole.

Speaker 2 (04:02):
In this video, I literally looked like my grandmother.

Speaker 3 (04:05):
Let's do this.

Speaker 1 (04:06):
Let's no filter it so Shannon looks No, I don't
want to filter, looks like a like a grown man.

Speaker 3 (04:16):
Story.

Speaker 2 (04:17):
That's it all right?

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Eight four four Mojo Live eight four four six six
five six five four eight What was your elf task?
Would you call it an elf tastrophe? Elf tastrophe? What
was your elf tastrophe? What? What happened to your your elf? That,
by the way, is honestly the reason why I'm happy
that the the kids are past the elf stage of
things that becomes crazy.

Speaker 2 (04:39):
It is so funny.

Speaker 4 (04:39):
Yesterday the elves painted everybody's toenails in the house, everybody, everybody.

Speaker 1 (04:45):
You said something interesting, you said that Wes's two kids
have elves.

Speaker 4 (04:49):
They have an elf Freddy yep, that they've had since
they were babies, since they were babies, and they still
like that still.

Speaker 2 (04:55):
Goes on still, I thought already back to the.

Speaker 3 (04:58):
North Pole, we had a couple.

Speaker 9 (05:01):
Yeah, now you know we're cheaper than other ones where
it was a little because you bought at a dollar from.

Speaker 4 (05:13):
Let me tell you how we've got we got. We
had one elf raised Krispy Tree. Mojo knows this was
you know, our original one. Well, then Andrew and I
got divorced, and so Rice Krispy Tree had to go
between two houses and.

Speaker 2 (05:27):
There was a mess up there was a.

Speaker 10 (05:28):
Mess up, and so we had to another elf had
to come, actually both of us first it was but
another elf had to come, and Lucy was like, that
is not Rice Krispy Tree.

Speaker 2 (05:42):
So we were like, oh, this is another.

Speaker 1 (05:44):
This is a new one. Hey, Gloria trying to explain
this very do before we talk about the elf. Don't
you want to see Shannon sagging skin?

Speaker 2 (05:52):
You guys know.

Speaker 3 (05:57):
What's going on.

Speaker 11 (05:58):
Good morning. I just wanted to come and that. This
was the first year that I did the elves sing
for my kids. I never wanted to be a part
of it, but my daughter's at that age where she's
going to get older. I'm like, let's just do it
one year. I will never do it again because of
my animals, not because of the mischief, not because of
the alves. Literally the first day that I did it,
I did the one where he was hanging from the balloon.

(06:20):
My son's cat was jumping mid air attacking it. It
got on the ground. My golden doodle thought it was
his baby, grabbed it. I had to chante him around
the house. It was like a nightmare. I even have
pictures every day when I set it up. My son's
cat is like just there, like Kee thinks he's a
part of it.

Speaker 7 (06:40):
He loves it.

Speaker 1 (06:41):
Like it used to be that your animals hated Christmas trees.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
Now they hate the elves, the alf.

Speaker 11 (06:48):
And it's the animals. I'm like, I can't every day
I'm like struggling because they're trying to get this alf.
I'm like, I'm done.

Speaker 1 (06:55):
I get it. And by the way, you didn't do anything.
The elf did it?

Speaker 11 (07:00):
Yeah, the elf, that is.

Speaker 3 (07:02):
And that elf may decide not to come back to your.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
Home next year, which so sad.

Speaker 1 (07:07):
Which wuld be very sad, but you know what, sometimes
that elf needs to go to a home that needs
What's going on, Katie.

Speaker 12 (07:16):
My elf he ate my elf had off?

Speaker 3 (07:21):
Wait? Wait, hold on your elf?

Speaker 10 (07:22):
My dog?

Speaker 7 (07:23):
Your dog ate my dog ate my elf had on?

Speaker 3 (07:28):
No, So so you have an elf without a hat?

Speaker 9 (07:33):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (07:34):
Well I got it back from the dog, did you, Katie?

Speaker 1 (07:37):
Katie, who you in the car with? Wait, you're not
not Katie. You're Ellie, aren't you. You're Ellie Katie's mom
with daughter Ellie. How old are you Ellie nine? How
did you get the hat bag? Did the dog have
to poop it out?

Speaker 6 (07:53):
No? How I grab it out of his mouth.

Speaker 1 (07:57):
Gosh, dangerous And what's your what's that naughty dog's name?

Speaker 13 (08:03):
Matt?

Speaker 5 (08:04):
What's your?

Speaker 12 (08:07):
We have a grinch elf which is named the Grinch.

Speaker 10 (08:10):
We have the elf the dog.

Speaker 12 (08:12):
Wait, what's the other elf?

Speaker 11 (08:14):
Name is Candy Kim?

Speaker 12 (08:16):
We have two elf pets.

Speaker 6 (08:18):
The dog is was it in.

Speaker 12 (08:19):
The elf pets?

Speaker 6 (08:21):
And then the boxes gun drop?

Speaker 3 (08:24):
Well, you got to protect the elf.

Speaker 1 (08:26):
You got to make sure that the elf stays up
so that nobody can get to it.

Speaker 3 (08:30):
Okay, make sure mommy does that for you. Thank you
Katie for.

Speaker 2 (08:34):
Calling in Mery Christmas? Christmas?

Speaker 3 (08:38):
Take care, guys. What's going on? How you doing? Kevin?

Speaker 7 (08:43):
Good?

Speaker 3 (08:44):
My elf?

Speaker 7 (08:45):
Uh? So? I took him for He liked to ride
in the front of my dunk tuck on the grill
in the winter. We were going to the es Curve
in the winter time. Somebody lost the metal garbage can
in the poor elf got.

Speaker 3 (09:04):
N Kevin, you are a bastard.

Speaker 1 (09:07):
By the way, do you know those kids that are
traumatized when they see an elf on your front grille
thinking that you hit the elbow?

Speaker 3 (09:14):
What an evil man you are?

Speaker 7 (09:16):
He wanted the cool.

Speaker 1 (09:20):
Why does it not surprise me that Kevin's got his
own elf. What's going on?

Speaker 3 (09:24):
Debbie?

Speaker 6 (09:25):
Hey, good morning morning. We bought one of them. We
bought one of those knockoff elves, and my kid named
it Elphis. He's a big Elvis fan. And we lost it,
so we had to and I looked everywhere to get
one that looked just like him, and I couldn't find it.
So we got to replacement elf and we told him
it was a substitute elf, like the substitute teacher.

Speaker 5 (09:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 10 (09:46):
I don't think.

Speaker 7 (09:47):
I don't think he bought an.

Speaker 11 (09:48):
He was skeptical that last year.

Speaker 1 (09:50):
Where do you get knockoff elves at you Amazon?

Speaker 11 (09:54):
I think it was fine.

Speaker 6 (09:55):
I think it was five below.

Speaker 3 (09:59):
Debbie, Debbie, Yeah, go blow your nose? Is it sonic?

Speaker 5 (10:12):
Yes?

Speaker 9 (10:13):
Good morning? That right next to the dancer press that
don't pay attention to him.

Speaker 13 (10:21):
Okay, Yeah, So I have the best Elf on the
shelf story. We had Engelbert, and we couldn't figure out
where to put him, so we my husband threw him
up in the light picture and once he was up there,
his legs hit the light bulb. We started smelling this

(10:42):
burning elf has caught on fire, kitchen tongs and then
wrapped his legs for emergency surgery.

Speaker 7 (10:54):
So that he had a camp for.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
Crazies on it. What a funny story. Hold on, last call, Candy,
what's up Candy?

Speaker 12 (11:06):
Hi, longtime listener, first time calling.

Speaker 3 (11:09):
On the phone.

Speaker 1 (11:10):
By the way, Candy, are you a human or are
you an elf? Are we talking to the actual elf
calling us up right now?

Speaker 11 (11:16):
Well, I mean I'm.

Speaker 12 (11:17):
About the size of an elf, but I am human.

Speaker 3 (11:19):
Okay, what's going on?

Speaker 11 (11:21):
Okay?

Speaker 12 (11:22):
So I have quite a few children. I collect them,
you know, like Pokemon cards, so we have I thought
the one year, it would be really cute to put
our elf in the shower, like on the little shelves,
you know, and put soap and stuff and put him

(11:42):
in there like he was taken a shower. And my
kids went in there and they refused to They were
scared to go into the bathroom and refuse to use
it because they said our ouse.

Speaker 11 (11:56):
Was a pervert.

Speaker 3 (11:59):
That's funny. Why is the elf taking a shower with
little kids?

Speaker 1 (12:05):
By the way, That, by the way, is going to
be one of those smart that's going to be a story.
There's going to be an expose on the local news stations,
and parents watch out there's an elf in showers here.

Speaker 3 (12:16):
Thank you Candy, You have a great day. Merry Christmas.