January 5, 2026 • 19 mins
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
All right, it is Mojo in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I want to kind of go around today and do
some topics with people about how they spent their break.
I'm gonna start with Shannon on this one here. Today,
I was wondering from you Christmas kids, no kids, what'd
you have?
Speaker 3 (00:16):
Well?
Speaker 4 (00:16):
Remember this was the first year we had six, all
six of us for Christmas, even Christmas Day, so myself,
my husband Wes, and then my kids Lucy and Smith.
That's all my step kids, Kieran and Samantha. So we
were trying to figure out, like, okay, how are we
going to blend traditions and expectations. I was so nervous
about Christmas Morning because my kids are little there's still
(00:37):
some magic that exists there and they get tons of gifts,
where the older kids, you know, they.
Speaker 5 (00:43):
Want more expensive things, and so they only got a
few things. I was worried about that.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
Overall, everything went really wonderful at a wonderful break, Christmas Eve, Christmas.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Day, fifty to fifty. What did you guys do?
Speaker 5 (00:55):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (00:56):
I'd like, how'd you blend electrician?
Speaker 4 (00:58):
We pretty much did everything that everybody was used to.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Okay, with Scotch eggs.
Speaker 5 (01:04):
No, it's blood pudding.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
So Wes's family is from Scotland and he makes Scottish
breakfast every year for part of his Christmas Morning tradition.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
It is nasty. It's it's like a lot of different things.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
There's like an egg component, there's like a potato scans thing,
which I actually is okay, there's Canadian, there's beat some
sort of meat, and then there's blood pudding, which.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Is blood which is sort of tradition.
Speaker 5 (01:30):
You didn't do it, uh No, this year.
Speaker 4 (01:33):
I had no qualms about saying I'm not even having
a bite of anything I made.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
I made monkey bread and scrambled eggs for myself.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
And Wes's kids enjoy the monkey bread and scram.
Speaker 5 (01:42):
They didn't eat any of that. They ate Scottish breakfast.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yeah, so everybody is very very used to to their thing.
Speaker 5 (01:49):
But it worked. We all sat around a table.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I think it would be nice because it would add
something different to things. I could see where some things
would probably.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Like Lucy's looking at the blood.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Yeah, I get it, absolutely, I get that, But I
also get then all of a sudden that sometimes some
of the traditions are oh, this is kind of cool.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
It's something new, you know, Yeah it's Christmas off with
blood and.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
That, but no, it was fun.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
Christmas, I've realized as wonderful as the past two weeks
were and Christmas, even Christmas Day specifically, like I truly
feel very very blessed. Christmas is still such a tough
holiday for me. It's my favorite holiday, but also a
really I don't want to stay depressing because I wasn't
necessarily depressed, it just there. It brings out something in
(02:36):
me that makes me very very sad. It's like heavy, Well,
I still have to give up my kids on Christmas Day,
so even the years that I get them on Christmas Morning,
I still at like ten thirty in the morning have
to hand them over to their dad and it it.
I thought it would get easier. It's been I don't
(02:56):
know six years. It has not gotten any easier. That
part is like gutting to me.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
I made it.
Speaker 5 (03:03):
And then they're with dad.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
This year they were with Dad then for almost a
week and a half because they went on vacation. So
also me knowing that I wasn't going to see them
for that long was really really tough.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Why is it that year?
Speaker 4 (03:15):
It's some years I don't have them on It's just
the way that we My family celebrates Christmas Eve, so
I always have them on Christmas Eve. My ex husband's
family always celebrates Christmas Day dinner, so he always gets
them for that for that portion of the day, and
then we rotate every other year back and forth Christmas Morning,
so there's some years I don't see them at all
on Christmas Day, So that makes sense.
Speaker 5 (03:37):
It's kind of confusing.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
But does ten o'clock come fast for you? Like?
Speaker 4 (03:41):
That wasn't even our designated time. Honestly, my ex husband
was really cool and was like, whatever time you guys
are done with gifts and breakfast, just call me, and
you know you can just want my He just he
wanted them. He knew at some point in the day
they were all waiting to open their gifts for Lucy
and Smith to come over and my kids freaking will coup.
Speaker 5 (03:58):
At four forty five.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
Am, so they had already been awake for a good chunk.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Of the morning wait before West's kids woke up.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
I made him wait for two hours. I made everybody
wait till about seven. Yeah, but so that's really tough.
And also my parents are divorced my parents got divorced
when I was in kindergarten, and that is still really
hard for me on holidays, Christmas, especially because I know
I still feel like I have to choose a parent.
(04:26):
And I got to see my mom on Christmas Eve
and we were we had my dad and my step
mom over for Christmas Day, but that meant that my
mom was alone all day on Christmas Day. And I
invited her, but that's weird because then it's my dad
and my stepmom and my mom and she was like, no,
I'm good, It is just I literally at one point
in the day West doesn't even know this. After everybody
(04:47):
left and it was just him and I, I went
in the bathroom and sat on the floor and just cry.
I'm like, there's so there's the highest of highs on
this day. And then also it's just really it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
What is the most emotion for you because you just
brought two big things together, your childhood emotion or your
children's emotion and your parent emotion.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
I hated that my mom was alone, but giving up
giving up Lucy and Smith when they're still little on
Christmas is really really tough.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Do you ever hate it? Again? Thought?
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It would get easier.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Has not Did you ever foreshadow you in your mom's
position at all?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
I thought about yes, but at least like I will
have Wes. My mom is single, so my mom has nobody.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
But still even with Wes, you still want to be
you know what I mean. It's like one of those
things like, yeah, like we have this conversation all the
time on the show with you and with keV, both
in relationships where there's been either not you guys all
together with you know, your the father of your child
(06:03):
children and the mother of your child children. But we
always sit there and go, man, why is it that
everybody just can't be together? And I get it, it
doesn't happen. It's you know, not all families happen that way.
Wouldn't it be awesome in a perfect world. Wouldn't it
be a perfect world where it's like everybody comes together
and you know, you kind of have one.
Speaker 5 (06:22):
Of those are you talking about my parents? My parents?
Speaker 4 (06:25):
Because my parents have come together for birthday parties and
for other things, But I think it would be awkward
if it was.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Just them, Like it would be such a like I
watched the Family Stone overbreak. We always watch the family Stone,
and I always watch it and it's like the whole
family everybody kind of pulls up into the house and
the you know, it's there's snow coming down and stuff outside,
and everybody comes together and they get into this one
nice warm house in somewhere, you know, Ville. And I
sit there and I think to myself, God, it would
(06:51):
It's just like, it would be such a wonderful thing
if everybody comes. But I could see where your pain
would come into play of your childhood but also your
pain of now being an adult mom, worried about your
own mom, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Yeah, Like that's got to be tough.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
It was just like a lot going through my brain. Yeah,
that morning.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
You know, it's funny because you're right, Christmas is a
wonderful holiday, but it also is a stressful holiday because
it's the stress of what you think it should be,
in the stress of what it actually is, and.
Speaker 5 (07:28):
Also the emptiness of what's missing.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
Yeah, even though there's so much, Like I started this
by saying, there's so much that I feel very very
blessed for. I have two healthy kids, my parents are
both still here. It's there's still pieces of it that I.
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Mourn.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Yeah, you know, man, I listen, I'm watching you tell
that story. And you know, it's funny as I try
to like look at you guys when you're telling your stories.
There's sometimes where I sit there and I look at
each of you guys, when you will tell or any
of you will tell us story that I know is
painful for you. And even though that pain was probably
worse on Christmas Day, I can still see the pain
(08:06):
in your face when you're talking about the idea that
you went into a bathroom and you got emotional, and uh,
we're thinking about your mom and thinking about you know,
your your kids, leading and all the rest of that.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Listener Lucy is on with us. What's going on? Listener Lucy?
How are you good?
Speaker 6 (08:25):
How were you guys?
Speaker 1 (08:26):
New Year?
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Ye?
Speaker 2 (08:27):
I say listener Lucy because I would assume if you
were Lucy Shannon's Lucy, which would be in which be
an unbelievable phone call to have, but it would be
up there on my callboard like that.
Speaker 6 (08:37):
I know, it's kind of funny. I just wanted to
say that I have a teenager and a single mom
to a fourteen year old son, and I had this moment.
It was kind of different situation. But he's fourteen, and
this Christmas was like a really bittersweet moment for me
because you know, he was getting older and it was
(08:58):
just my family and I are close, but it's just
different now. And so I had a moment looking back
at my own childhood and not that it's just I mean,
it's gone, but it's also like my son's childhood is
like going and it's just been a crazy year. And
I don't know if this if you guys can relate,
but the teenagers, they don't talk about that.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Yeah, how was your childhood? What was your childhood?
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Like?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
It was amazing.
Speaker 6 (09:23):
I had the best childhood. My family came together. I mean,
my family is huge, and my grandparents.
Speaker 5 (09:28):
Held it all together.
Speaker 6 (09:30):
So it's just like was one of those years where
you're looking back and it's just all really bit or sweet.
Speaker 5 (09:35):
But it was a good holiday either way.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
And your your son, your teenager is getting a good
childhood right now? Do you feel like your teenage exactly?
Who do you think? Because I look at my kid's
life compared to my life, and honestly, I think my
kids have a better life than I had.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Oh that's the whole point. I wanted to make sure
my son had a better life.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
And I think that for Chelsea would probably say the
same thing too, because of her family went through divorce.
My family went through death. And I look at it
and I and I that Kevin's right. It is your goal.
Your goal is to make your child's life, you know,
better than yours. I would ask you, Shannon, how do
you think that your kid's life as compared to the
life that you had as a child.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
I had a great life, but my kids had a
fantastic liace.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Yeah, And again that that is my goal as a mom,
is to make sure that they, you know, not only
have everything that they need, but are are making great
memories and can look back and go, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
It's funny because I asked you to foreshadow yourself and
what it would be like for you to be in
your mom's position, if you know that should happen where
Lucy and Smith were with their families and all the
rest of that stuff. And I sit there and I
think to myself, I wonder, you know, if Lucy and
Smith ever you know, look at it, I wonder how
they take it when they go off to Dad's house.
Speaker 5 (10:53):
Or you know, do they feel cold? You mean, yeah,
oh I think so.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
I mean for Christmas Day as a divorce kid, I
can say this and they said it too.
Speaker 5 (11:00):
They're like, it's two houses of presents.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
They're not thinking of, you know, the the leaving one
parent and going to another, and then that's not part
of their brain yet. But I definitely think it affects
them in other ways, maybe not on Christmas morning.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Do kids have divorced because I never went through divorce,
thank God, and you know, but I do kids have divorced?
Do they ever check in on you?
Speaker 5 (11:23):
Well they're away, Well they.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
They see how you're doing.
Speaker 4 (11:27):
They facetimed me every day that they were gone on vacation. Yeah,
which was that helped my heart so much.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Are they facetiming you just to say hi? Or are
they facetiming you sometimes? Do you ever think to check
on you?
Speaker 5 (11:40):
I think Lucy Face times me to check on me.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Really?
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Yeah, it's cool. He's very emotionally intelligent like that.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Selena, what's up?
Speaker 7 (11:47):
By first time? Long time? I just want to say, Shannon,
and I know what you're going through. My husband has
an eight year old son that he shares joint custody
with so we get him so first part of winter
break or and sometimes the second part, depending on the air.
(12:10):
This year we had him on Christmas Day till the third.
So it's always hard picking them off and taking them
home because I have a three year old son myself
and they are very very very close, and when we
have to take my steps on backs, my feal kind
of gets sad because all he says is I want
(12:32):
big Blater, I want big Blater, and without having my
steps on there, it kind of feels like we're not
complete as a family because he kind of ficks that
missing piece.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
That we have.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Sorry I'm about to say, it's like, yeah, that's not there.
Speaker 8 (12:52):
Yeah I was.
Speaker 7 (12:53):
I've been in my steps on his life since he
was actually three weeks old. His dad and I were
together before he was born, but I've been participating adult
figure since he was three weeks so he he's like
a factor of my life.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
So yeah, yeah, yeah, Well you know what you made
it through. And I'm sure that the next time that
you saw a big brother or however he pronounced it,
I bet it was probably very cool to see the
interaction between them, to see how excited they were, and
then they got into a fight and probably.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
What's up, Heather? How you doing?
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Hey good?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
How are you?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
We're doing everybody's bad? Yeah, how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (13:38):
Oh? Pretty good? I really feel for you, Shannon. I
had to go through this seventeen years ago when I
was first of board. It was a lot of years before.
I was not sad on the days that I didn't
have the case Christmas morning, Like, my heartbreaks for you
because like this is new for you and trying to
come up with new traditions.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
And the amazing thing is, can I say something real quick?
This was actually a good year for Shannon because.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
There was a great but what I'm saying like this,
it was a wonderful year. I loved having all four kids.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
It was.
Speaker 5 (14:08):
But that's what I'm saying. It's the highest of high.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
You're so happy and then in a matter of twenty minutes,
everybody leaves and you're like, oh my.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Gosh, it's so quiet, and I love it.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
I mean, obviously I'm you know, fortunate to have West there,
but even Wes was like, what just happened.
Speaker 5 (14:22):
It's like the spirit got sucked out of the house,
you know.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah, well yeah, and that's what it does. It's like
when all the kids are gone, because I'm now in
a blended family. It's like when all the kids are
gone and ships empty and quiet, and it sucks. It
really does suck. But like you and West just need
to come up with your own traditions for when it's
shits you with yep, like after the kids go see
(14:46):
a movie you're but like it's hard and my heart
breaks for you, even though I understand it's the highest
the high, but it's rushing and then all your old
traditions change.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
It's amazing because this does happen on other days, right,
it happens you know, March and whatever.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
But it's wild about the holidays.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
For some reason, Christmas really gets me good.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Yeah, there's and it's it's wild because of I do
think that there is a level of like she said,
come up with your thing to do. But no matter
what you do and what tradition you do, it's never
going to be this. You know, same as what it's
like pre ten am you know what I mean, and
(15:30):
and you know them getting up and I will say this,
there is nothing better in your life than when your
kids wake up at four o'clock in the morning, and one,
I know it's I know it sucks in the moment,
but I will say this as somebody that you know,
your kid sleeps the entire day and you're waiting for
him to wake up, you know what I mean? Like,
I think that that is one of those things where
(15:50):
I will never forget those moments of the door. You know,
literally we just went to bed because we just saw,
you know, and you're like, can't they sleep for another
five more hours?
Speaker 1 (16:02):
You know, Melissa, what's up?
Speaker 3 (16:04):
Hi?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
It's Mojo in the morning.
Speaker 9 (16:07):
Hi. Yeah, I can totally relate because I'm going through
a divorce right now and it's not final yet. But
I have a fourteen year old son, and this was
like my first Christmas where like he wasn't with me.
I mean, he came over on Christmas Day for a
little while, but like I woke up by myself on
Christmas morning and it was just so different, and both
(16:30):
my parents are gone and I really don't have like
any family, and so I was just so fad that's
Christmas because it was so different and I've been used
to being around family and going places and waking up
with my son and yeah, this Christmas was so different.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
It's definitely and this was your very first time that
this happened to you, so this is this is so
fresh for you right now.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (17:02):
Yeah, I just tried to like stay busy and so
that I didn't like, I'm working to jobs. So I
was just trying to stay busy and not really think
about it. But yeah, now that he's getting I can
relate to another color that said she had a fourteen
year old son, because yeah, as they get older, you know,
I want to try to give them the best blights
(17:23):
that I can't. But now you know, it's going through
a divorce that's definitely different for him, and you know,
I'm just trying to do the best pick can for him.
Speaker 4 (17:32):
Yeah, well, you know what, it's nice to get.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
And it's nice to talk about. You know.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I know that sometimes you know, it's like you want
to tune into us and you want us to bring
you uplifting things. But I think sometimes it's nice to
be able to For you, it's therapeutic to be able
to have a conversation. And for anybody that's listening that
went through the same exact thing, they don't.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Feel like they're nuts.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's wild.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I've gone through so many stages of my marriage right
where we've gone through ups and downs and divorce attorneys
and no divorce attorneys, and we've kind of stuck it out.
And it's weird because I don't know why God has
given us the ability to be able to still be
together through through it all. But there were many of
moments when I remember going into my therapist's office where
(18:20):
I said to him, I wanted I want to be
divorced so bad, but I don't want to not be
able to spend Christmas with my kids. And as weird
as it sounds, there was something about Christmas and that
idea that when even when Chelsea and I were the
worst of the worst, that it was one of those
things where I sat there and I thought, I just
don't want to have to give the kids up on
(18:42):
a Christmas Day. Yeah, and so instead I'm and Chelsea
and I are both miserable, so.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
We just but Christmas was good.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
No, I'm just kidding, no, but I will say that,
but that was literally what I what we thought.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
I remember you talking about that before.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And it's one of those things where I get it
it's not going to work for everybody, but it was
one of those things where when I hear you talk
about this, it makes me go holy crap and think
about that.
Speaker 8 (19:08):
People pray for peace and quiet, and that has a place.
Your life and your home is its most quietest on
the day that you have to give up your children.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
It is.
Speaker 8 (19:18):
And that is a quietness and a loneliness that I
wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Yeah, it is the
worst kind of thing.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah,
All right, it is Mojo in the morning.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
I want to kind of go around today and do
some topics with people about how they spent their break.
I'm gonna start with Shannon on this one here. Today,
I was wondering from you Christmas kids, no kids, what'd
you have?
Speaker 3 (00:16):
Well?
Speaker 4 (00:16):
Remember this was the first year we had six, all
six of us for Christmas, even Christmas Day, so myself,
my husband Wes, and then my kids Lucy and Smith.
That's all my step kids, Kieran and Samantha. So we
were trying to figure out, like, okay, how are we
going to blend traditions and expectations. I was so nervous
about Christmas Morning because my kids are little there's still
(00:37):
some magic that exists there and they get tons of gifts,
where the older kids, you know, they.
Speaker 5 (00:43):
Want more expensive things, and so they only got a
few things. I was worried about that.
Speaker 4 (00:47):
Overall, everything went really wonderful at a wonderful break, Christmas Eve, Christmas.
Speaker 1 (00:53):
Day, fifty to fifty. What did you guys do?
Speaker 5 (00:55):
What do you mean?
Speaker 1 (00:56):
I'd like, how'd you blend electrician?
Speaker 4 (00:58):
We pretty much did everything that everybody was used to.
Speaker 1 (01:02):
Okay, with Scotch eggs.
Speaker 5 (01:04):
No, it's blood pudding.
Speaker 4 (01:05):
So Wes's family is from Scotland and he makes Scottish
breakfast every year for part of his Christmas Morning tradition.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
It is nasty. It's it's like a lot of different things.
Speaker 4 (01:17):
There's like an egg component, there's like a potato scans thing,
which I actually is okay, there's Canadian, there's beat some
sort of meat, and then there's blood pudding, which.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Is blood which is sort of tradition.
Speaker 5 (01:30):
You didn't do it, uh No, this year.
Speaker 4 (01:33):
I had no qualms about saying I'm not even having
a bite of anything I made.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
I made monkey bread and scrambled eggs for myself.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
And Wes's kids enjoy the monkey bread and scram.
Speaker 5 (01:42):
They didn't eat any of that. They ate Scottish breakfast.
Speaker 4 (01:45):
Yeah, so everybody is very very used to to their thing.
Speaker 5 (01:49):
But it worked. We all sat around a table.
Speaker 2 (01:52):
I think it would be nice because it would add
something different to things. I could see where some things
would probably.
Speaker 5 (01:58):
Like Lucy's looking at the blood.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Yeah, I get it, absolutely, I get that, But I
also get then all of a sudden that sometimes some
of the traditions are oh, this is kind of cool.
Speaker 1 (02:06):
It's something new, you know, Yeah it's Christmas off with
blood and.
Speaker 5 (02:12):
That, but no, it was fun.
Speaker 4 (02:13):
Christmas, I've realized as wonderful as the past two weeks
were and Christmas, even Christmas Day specifically, like I truly
feel very very blessed. Christmas is still such a tough
holiday for me. It's my favorite holiday, but also a
really I don't want to stay depressing because I wasn't
necessarily depressed, it just there. It brings out something in
(02:36):
me that makes me very very sad. It's like heavy, Well,
I still have to give up my kids on Christmas Day,
so even the years that I get them on Christmas Morning,
I still at like ten thirty in the morning have
to hand them over to their dad and it it.
I thought it would get easier. It's been I don't
(02:56):
know six years. It has not gotten any easier. That
part is like gutting to me.
Speaker 1 (03:02):
I made it.
Speaker 5 (03:03):
And then they're with dad.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
This year they were with Dad then for almost a
week and a half because they went on vacation. So
also me knowing that I wasn't going to see them
for that long was really really tough.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Why is it that year?
Speaker 4 (03:15):
It's some years I don't have them on It's just
the way that we My family celebrates Christmas Eve, so
I always have them on Christmas Eve. My ex husband's
family always celebrates Christmas Day dinner, so he always gets
them for that for that portion of the day, and
then we rotate every other year back and forth Christmas Morning,
so there's some years I don't see them at all
on Christmas Day, So that makes sense.
Speaker 5 (03:37):
It's kind of confusing.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
But does ten o'clock come fast for you? Like?
Speaker 4 (03:41):
That wasn't even our designated time. Honestly, my ex husband
was really cool and was like, whatever time you guys
are done with gifts and breakfast, just call me, and
you know you can just want my He just he
wanted them. He knew at some point in the day
they were all waiting to open their gifts for Lucy
and Smith to come over and my kids freaking will coup.
Speaker 5 (03:58):
At four forty five.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
Am, so they had already been awake for a good chunk.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
Of the morning wait before West's kids woke up.
Speaker 4 (04:06):
I made him wait for two hours. I made everybody
wait till about seven. Yeah, but so that's really tough.
And also my parents are divorced my parents got divorced
when I was in kindergarten, and that is still really
hard for me on holidays, Christmas, especially because I know
I still feel like I have to choose a parent.
(04:26):
And I got to see my mom on Christmas Eve
and we were we had my dad and my step
mom over for Christmas Day, but that meant that my
mom was alone all day on Christmas Day. And I
invited her, but that's weird because then it's my dad
and my stepmom and my mom and she was like, no,
I'm good, It is just I literally at one point
in the day West doesn't even know this. After everybody
(04:47):
left and it was just him and I, I went
in the bathroom and sat on the floor and just cry.
I'm like, there's so there's the highest of highs on
this day. And then also it's just really it's a lot.
Speaker 2 (04:58):
What is the most emotion for you because you just
brought two big things together, your childhood emotion or your
children's emotion and your parent emotion.
Speaker 4 (05:11):
I hated that my mom was alone, but giving up
giving up Lucy and Smith when they're still little on
Christmas is really really tough.
Speaker 1 (05:20):
Do you ever hate it? Again? Thought?
Speaker 5 (05:22):
It would get easier.
Speaker 2 (05:24):
Has not Did you ever foreshadow you in your mom's
position at all?
Speaker 4 (05:30):
I thought about yes, but at least like I will
have Wes. My mom is single, so my mom has nobody.
Speaker 2 (05:38):
But still even with Wes, you still want to be
you know what I mean. It's like one of those
things like, yeah, like we have this conversation all the
time on the show with you and with keV, both
in relationships where there's been either not you guys all
together with you know, your the father of your child
(06:03):
children and the mother of your child children. But we
always sit there and go, man, why is it that
everybody just can't be together? And I get it, it
doesn't happen. It's you know, not all families happen that way.
Wouldn't it be awesome in a perfect world. Wouldn't it
be a perfect world where it's like everybody comes together
and you know, you kind of have one.
Speaker 5 (06:22):
Of those are you talking about my parents? My parents?
Speaker 4 (06:25):
Because my parents have come together for birthday parties and
for other things, But I think it would be awkward
if it was.
Speaker 2 (06:30):
Just them, Like it would be such a like I
watched the Family Stone overbreak. We always watch the family Stone,
and I always watch it and it's like the whole
family everybody kind of pulls up into the house and
the you know, it's there's snow coming down and stuff outside,
and everybody comes together and they get into this one
nice warm house in somewhere, you know, Ville. And I
sit there and I think to myself, God, it would
(06:51):
It's just like, it would be such a wonderful thing
if everybody comes. But I could see where your pain
would come into play of your childhood but also your
pain of now being an adult mom, worried about your
own mom, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1 (07:06):
Yeah, Like that's got to be tough.
Speaker 5 (07:07):
It was just like a lot going through my brain. Yeah,
that morning.
Speaker 2 (07:11):
You know, it's funny because you're right, Christmas is a
wonderful holiday, but it also is a stressful holiday because
it's the stress of what you think it should be,
in the stress of what it actually is, and.
Speaker 5 (07:28):
Also the emptiness of what's missing.
Speaker 4 (07:30):
Yeah, even though there's so much, Like I started this
by saying, there's so much that I feel very very
blessed for. I have two healthy kids, my parents are
both still here. It's there's still pieces of it that I.
Speaker 5 (07:45):
Mourn.
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Yeah, you know, man, I listen, I'm watching you tell
that story. And you know, it's funny as I try
to like look at you guys when you're telling your stories.
There's sometimes where I sit there and I look at
each of you guys, when you will tell or any
of you will tell us story that I know is
painful for you. And even though that pain was probably
worse on Christmas Day, I can still see the pain
(08:06):
in your face when you're talking about the idea that
you went into a bathroom and you got emotional, and uh,
we're thinking about your mom and thinking about you know,
your your kids, leading and all the rest of that.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Listener Lucy is on with us. What's going on? Listener Lucy?
How are you good?
Speaker 6 (08:25):
How were you guys?
Speaker 1 (08:26):
New Year?
Speaker 3 (08:27):
Ye?
Speaker 2 (08:27):
I say listener Lucy because I would assume if you
were Lucy Shannon's Lucy, which would be in which be
an unbelievable phone call to have, but it would be
up there on my callboard like that.
Speaker 6 (08:37):
I know, it's kind of funny. I just wanted to
say that I have a teenager and a single mom
to a fourteen year old son, and I had this moment.
It was kind of different situation. But he's fourteen, and
this Christmas was like a really bittersweet moment for me
because you know, he was getting older and it was
(08:58):
just my family and I are close, but it's just
different now. And so I had a moment looking back
at my own childhood and not that it's just I mean,
it's gone, but it's also like my son's childhood is
like going and it's just been a crazy year. And
I don't know if this if you guys can relate,
but the teenagers, they don't talk about that.
Speaker 2 (09:17):
Yeah, how was your childhood? What was your childhood?
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Like?
Speaker 4 (09:22):
It was amazing.
Speaker 6 (09:23):
I had the best childhood. My family came together. I mean,
my family is huge, and my grandparents.
Speaker 5 (09:28):
Held it all together.
Speaker 6 (09:30):
So it's just like was one of those years where
you're looking back and it's just all really bit or sweet.
Speaker 5 (09:35):
But it was a good holiday either way.
Speaker 2 (09:37):
And your your son, your teenager is getting a good
childhood right now? Do you feel like your teenage exactly?
Who do you think? Because I look at my kid's
life compared to my life, and honestly, I think my
kids have a better life than I had.
Speaker 6 (09:51):
Oh that's the whole point. I wanted to make sure
my son had a better life.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
And I think that for Chelsea would probably say the
same thing too, because of her family went through divorce.
My family went through death. And I look at it
and I and I that Kevin's right. It is your goal.
Your goal is to make your child's life, you know,
better than yours. I would ask you, Shannon, how do
you think that your kid's life as compared to the
life that you had as a child.
Speaker 5 (10:16):
I had a great life, but my kids had a
fantastic liace.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (10:19):
Yeah, And again that that is my goal as a mom,
is to make sure that they, you know, not only
have everything that they need, but are are making great
memories and can look back and go, oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
It's funny because I asked you to foreshadow yourself and
what it would be like for you to be in
your mom's position, if you know that should happen where
Lucy and Smith were with their families and all the
rest of that stuff. And I sit there and I
think to myself, I wonder, you know, if Lucy and
Smith ever you know, look at it, I wonder how
they take it when they go off to Dad's house.
Speaker 5 (10:53):
Or you know, do they feel cold? You mean, yeah,
oh I think so.
Speaker 4 (10:57):
I mean for Christmas Day as a divorce kid, I
can say this and they said it too.
Speaker 5 (11:00):
They're like, it's two houses of presents.
Speaker 4 (11:03):
They're not thinking of, you know, the the leaving one
parent and going to another, and then that's not part
of their brain yet. But I definitely think it affects
them in other ways, maybe not on Christmas morning.
Speaker 2 (11:15):
Do kids have divorced because I never went through divorce,
thank God, and you know, but I do kids have divorced?
Do they ever check in on you?
Speaker 5 (11:23):
Well they're away, Well they.
Speaker 1 (11:26):
They see how you're doing.
Speaker 4 (11:27):
They facetimed me every day that they were gone on vacation. Yeah,
which was that helped my heart so much.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Are they facetiming you just to say hi? Or are
they facetiming you sometimes? Do you ever think to check
on you?
Speaker 5 (11:40):
I think Lucy Face times me to check on me.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Really?
Speaker 4 (11:42):
Yeah, it's cool. He's very emotionally intelligent like that.
Speaker 1 (11:45):
Selena, what's up?
Speaker 7 (11:47):
By first time? Long time? I just want to say, Shannon,
and I know what you're going through. My husband has
an eight year old son that he shares joint custody
with so we get him so first part of winter
break or and sometimes the second part, depending on the air.
(12:10):
This year we had him on Christmas Day till the third.
So it's always hard picking them off and taking them
home because I have a three year old son myself
and they are very very very close, and when we
have to take my steps on backs, my feal kind
of gets sad because all he says is I want
(12:32):
big Blater, I want big Blater, and without having my
steps on there, it kind of feels like we're not
complete as a family because he kind of ficks that
missing piece.
Speaker 3 (12:44):
That we have.
Speaker 5 (12:45):
Sorry I'm about to say, it's like, yeah, that's not there.
Speaker 8 (12:52):
Yeah I was.
Speaker 7 (12:53):
I've been in my steps on his life since he
was actually three weeks old. His dad and I were
together before he was born, but I've been participating adult
figure since he was three weeks so he he's like
a factor of my life.
Speaker 2 (13:09):
So yeah, yeah, yeah, Well you know what you made
it through. And I'm sure that the next time that
you saw a big brother or however he pronounced it,
I bet it was probably very cool to see the
interaction between them, to see how excited they were, and
then they got into a fight and probably.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
What's up, Heather? How you doing?
Speaker 7 (13:32):
Hey good?
Speaker 3 (13:32):
How are you?
Speaker 1 (13:33):
We're doing everybody's bad? Yeah, how are you doing?
Speaker 3 (13:38):
Oh? Pretty good? I really feel for you, Shannon. I
had to go through this seventeen years ago when I
was first of board. It was a lot of years before.
I was not sad on the days that I didn't
have the case Christmas morning, Like, my heartbreaks for you
because like this is new for you and trying to
come up with new traditions.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
And the amazing thing is, can I say something real quick?
This was actually a good year for Shannon because.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
There was a great but what I'm saying like this,
it was a wonderful year. I loved having all four kids.
Speaker 1 (14:07):
It was.
Speaker 5 (14:08):
But that's what I'm saying. It's the highest of high.
Speaker 4 (14:10):
You're so happy and then in a matter of twenty minutes,
everybody leaves and you're like, oh my.
Speaker 5 (14:15):
Gosh, it's so quiet, and I love it.
Speaker 4 (14:18):
I mean, obviously I'm you know, fortunate to have West there,
but even Wes was like, what just happened.
Speaker 5 (14:22):
It's like the spirit got sucked out of the house,
you know.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
Yeah, well yeah, and that's what it does. It's like
when all the kids are gone, because I'm now in
a blended family. It's like when all the kids are
gone and ships empty and quiet, and it sucks. It
really does suck. But like you and West just need
to come up with your own traditions for when it's
shits you with yep, like after the kids go see
(14:46):
a movie you're but like it's hard and my heart
breaks for you, even though I understand it's the highest
the high, but it's rushing and then all your old
traditions change.
Speaker 1 (14:56):
It's amazing.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
It's amazing because this does happen on other days, right,
it happens you know, March and whatever.
Speaker 1 (15:05):
But it's wild about the holidays.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
For some reason, Christmas really gets me good.
Speaker 2 (15:10):
Yeah, there's and it's it's wild because of I do
think that there is a level of like she said,
come up with your thing to do. But no matter
what you do and what tradition you do, it's never
going to be this. You know, same as what it's
like pre ten am you know what I mean, and
(15:30):
and you know them getting up and I will say this,
there is nothing better in your life than when your
kids wake up at four o'clock in the morning, and one,
I know it's I know it sucks in the moment,
but I will say this as somebody that you know,
your kid sleeps the entire day and you're waiting for
him to wake up, you know what I mean? Like,
I think that that is one of those things where
(15:50):
I will never forget those moments of the door. You know,
literally we just went to bed because we just saw,
you know, and you're like, can't they sleep for another
five more hours?
Speaker 1 (16:02):
You know, Melissa, what's up?
Speaker 3 (16:04):
Hi?
Speaker 1 (16:04):
It's Mojo in the morning.
Speaker 9 (16:07):
Hi. Yeah, I can totally relate because I'm going through
a divorce right now and it's not final yet. But
I have a fourteen year old son, and this was
like my first Christmas where like he wasn't with me.
I mean, he came over on Christmas Day for a
little while, but like I woke up by myself on
Christmas morning and it was just so different, and both
(16:30):
my parents are gone and I really don't have like
any family, and so I was just so fad that's
Christmas because it was so different and I've been used
to being around family and going places and waking up
with my son and yeah, this Christmas was so different.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
It's definitely and this was your very first time that
this happened to you, so this is this is so
fresh for you right now.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 9 (17:02):
Yeah, I just tried to like stay busy and so
that I didn't like, I'm working to jobs. So I
was just trying to stay busy and not really think
about it. But yeah, now that he's getting I can
relate to another color that said she had a fourteen
year old son, because yeah, as they get older, you know,
I want to try to give them the best blights
(17:23):
that I can't. But now you know, it's going through
a divorce that's definitely different for him, and you know,
I'm just trying to do the best pick can for him.
Speaker 4 (17:32):
Yeah, well, you know what, it's nice to get.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
And it's nice to talk about. You know.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
I know that sometimes you know, it's like you want
to tune into us and you want us to bring
you uplifting things. But I think sometimes it's nice to
be able to For you, it's therapeutic to be able
to have a conversation. And for anybody that's listening that
went through the same exact thing, they don't.
Speaker 1 (17:54):
Feel like they're nuts.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
You know.
Speaker 1 (17:55):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's wild.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
I've gone through so many stages of my marriage right
where we've gone through ups and downs and divorce attorneys
and no divorce attorneys, and we've kind of stuck it out.
And it's weird because I don't know why God has
given us the ability to be able to still be
together through through it all. But there were many of
moments when I remember going into my therapist's office where
(18:20):
I said to him, I wanted I want to be
divorced so bad, but I don't want to not be
able to spend Christmas with my kids. And as weird
as it sounds, there was something about Christmas and that
idea that when even when Chelsea and I were the
worst of the worst, that it was one of those
things where I sat there and I thought, I just
don't want to have to give the kids up on
(18:42):
a Christmas Day. Yeah, and so instead I'm and Chelsea
and I are both miserable, so.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
We just but Christmas was good.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
No, I'm just kidding, no, but I will say that,
but that was literally what I what we thought.
Speaker 5 (18:55):
I remember you talking about that before.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
And it's one of those things where I get it
it's not going to work for everybody, but it was
one of those things where when I hear you talk
about this, it makes me go holy crap and think
about that.
Speaker 8 (19:08):
People pray for peace and quiet, and that has a place.
Your life and your home is its most quietest on
the day that you have to give up your children.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
It is.
Speaker 8 (19:18):
And that is a quietness and a loneliness that I
wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Yeah, it is the
worst kind of thing.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Yeah,
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