February 21, 2025 • 39 mins
Mitch calls for this special episode so he can air his dirty laundry and confess about his past.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to the two seventeen Recovery Broadcast. If you don't
make mistakes, you won't learn.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
With your host Corey Winfield, you know how you know
fish is bad if you can't put it on pizza.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
It's a special guest Mitchell Obra, I.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Really hate to do listen to you guys, but I
really have to go to the app where held Dad?
Speaker 1 (00:23):
I just like, can't hold it anymore? Got your ass?
And Corey Smoker, Hey, I like the big Monsters.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
It is the twenty first of February twenty twenty five,
or half assed in it today? Should I have made
an intro with Corey's name is absolutely problem.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Well I'm getting really good excuses imprompt too.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
And well what happened was my son is coming back
from daycare and my wife Marnie had to go get them,
and so we have very little time to do this
podcast today. We got phones ringing now, I mean, people
are just not respecting our time. So didn't really have
(01:07):
time to throw it all together to make the intro
with Corey's name.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
And I apologize for that.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
Yeah, I don't feel really bad about it. I just
you know, sorry, just to the people who didn't it's
fun Friday. They'll forgive us didn't get that full open correctly.
But yeah, so how you doing, Mitch? You wanted to
talk poop today, Well.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
We talked about it the other day with a gentleman
who's out here right now about poop stories. Obviously we
should podcast this because we were sharing different because I'm
the resident senior correspondent for poop emergencies.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yes, and if you haven't seen Mitch's video based on
a true story, yeah, based on a true story two
seventeen Recovery dot com. You might have to go to
videos and then click more, load more whatever it says, and
then scroll down to see the bear mask and it's
called bear you.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Get on the YouTube two seventeen Recovery doc or two
seventeen Recovery Confused right now, Mitch YouTube, I'm going to
where the YouTube at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Yeah, yeah, I screwed that part up. I know that
be so confused.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, if you go to the two seventeen recovery YouTube,
it's pretty easy to find. It's the only one with
the bear. Yeah, and that's I think I think it's
at two seventeen Recovery or something. I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I think we have enough people that like us, we
get our own handle or whatever it's called.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Oh nice, Yeah, I didn't know that was the thing.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, I think YouTube dot com at two seventeen recovery
is what you Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I still just search it.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
One day, I'm going to get this figured out and
we'll tell you exactly where to go. But yeah, what
it is on our website anyway? Yeah, Mitch, it was
based on True Story and then it turned into a
Colone commercial. But it's it's it's good and that did happen.
So Mitch has been talking about this atm story.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Well, we had.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Another person industry and I'm using air quotes here. The
industry of sex was something else? What Yeah you've never
heard that? No, wow, you never heard the have you
Cory Smokers? Now I was back in joining us. Have
you heard the adult term or if you're familiar with
(03:23):
the adult industry or the industry is what I said, right, Yeah,
they have a different name for atm oh okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
Adult industry. But I don't know what that word is.
I mean I think I have idea what adults.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Not? Okay, we can try to maybe this isn't that
kind of story.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Sometimes they assume all black people are from African America.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Okay, I could have just said.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
We've ever to find that button too, but no. But
because Mitch was talking about because we're talking poop stories,
Mitch really wanted to talk about poop stories with her.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Husband, and we were going back and forth, and I
was like, I have the poop story to end all
poop stories, and I just can't believe that it hasn't come.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Up and conversate and then he says to me about ATM,
and I'm like, hmm.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
It's not an adult industry. Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I was like, because you were like you were like
so excited to tell it, I'm like, no way, we'll
do on the.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Podcast like ATM where you go get.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Money it was one of those, or ATM as you
go get booty to lips.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Sometimes they assume all black people are from African America.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
I really wanted her to say it, Mitchell. She was
thinking Will's returning. Did you know what that meant? No? Wise, anyway,
all right, so covert. So the money ATM is what
we're talking about.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Yeah, ATM Machine Automatic.
Speaker 5 (05:01):
You drive up with your car, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Braille yeah, the story was told about your husband Corey
and grabbing bumpers. I've never had to do that. Knock
on wood. Mitch immediately knew what grabbing bumper meant, and
he was like, oh god, yeah. He started telling a
story when he went to his family's Thanksgiving or Christmas
or twenty yeah, some holiday gathering. As he's holding the
(05:25):
sweet potatoes in one hand and the bumper and the
other just letting.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
It rips right by his don't look behind his aunt's vehicle,
not even his own Honda.
Speaker 5 (05:35):
Do you know what's funny to me?
Speaker 4 (05:36):
I just put this all togethers So Jesse was sick
with COVID bumper grabbing, and you're in the COVID twenty
twenty bumper grabbed.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Yeah, yeah, I didn't have COVID at the time. Just
bumper Buddies.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Yeah, you guys should get his shirts and sell of them.
We could wait for that bumper Body Bumper Buddies podcast
to come.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Out in the last three months. It'll be great and
just pictures.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Of people shitting all across the United States in America's
gonna be did.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
To us both ways, like holding a bumper squat it down,
but from the side, so you can't actually see anything explicit,
kind of like Jackass doing slow mo.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
Maybe we should get you guys the little hitch that
hooks into the back of your truck and you can
the toilet.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
There was a comment about that Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hmmm, yeah, well then don't say you guys like you're
done out Jesse and Midge. That's that's what she meant. Yeah,
I want you to throw me in that. I want
people thinking that I'm grabbing bumbers. I walked. It's the
easiest way if you're in a pinch. There was no
pinching that could happen at that point, Like, man.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
I still am.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
I'm left stuck at the part where you're like I
could not move any muscle.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Anybody has been there, they know exactly what I'm talking about.
I was the pinching, Like I said, the clenching was
happening the whole way to Thanksgiving, which was.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
About it sounded like that.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
And they got out of the car and my kid
with me, ten, stood up, and that was when my
body was like, Nope, this is happening now.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
And the hoover dam was not holding this back.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Oh my god, and this is this happened during the
ATM story where you just get to a point where
you cannot take another step without excreting.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
Wow, yeah, and it happens.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
See, this is what we need to talk to a
logan about. Oh yeah, like where where did it really
start going wrong? Wasn't your dad's drinking or your dad's pooping?
So him and I had this conversation yesterday over text message.
He's trying to get out of school because he had
a tummy ache. Oh yeah, yeah, And I was like,
I was like, buddy, I've had these guts for thirty
(08:15):
eight years. You're gonna have to run to the bathroom
and deal with it. You'll be fine, It'll be fine.
Go poop a couple times, you'll be fine. An hour
and a half later, after arguing with him, he goes,
by the way, you're right, Yeah, I feel a lot better, Like, yeah,
I know, but dealing this, dealing with this for a
long time, runs in the family, runs in the jeans,
(08:37):
as they say, not in the.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Jeans, jeans, And obviously Anti's car behind it. All right,
So you're gonna te us about the ATM story then.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Yeah, So this is a pre sober Mitchell. This is
pre child Mitchell. Actually I was with his mother. We
were dating.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
Oh, this is a great story, and there's.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
A restaurant in Interlocking we decided to walk to because
I was living out there at the time. I think
we're getting ready to look for an apartment, is what
it was. Sort of staying with my family for a
short period of time while we were doing like apartment applications.
So we're like, hey, let's go to this. We'll walk
down to this restaurant. It'll be nice evening, it'd be great.
So go down there, and it's one of the nicer
(09:27):
ones in the area. And they have like a little
bar area, but they have really good food and all
sorts of you can get lobster tail at a bar,
pizza if you want to, a burger or a steak,
like you all sorts of stuff. I don't think i'd
in this place.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
Yeah, yeah, I don't want to New York.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
They're not a sponsor, so don't want to talk. I
don't remember their name. It's like there's outside seating, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Yeah, which there's a couple of them like that.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
But anyway, I've been at one of them. It was
all right. Yeah, And so we go down there I
order a pizza, she orders whatever, chicken sandwich or some stuff,
and it comes time to you know, I have a
couple of beers. You know, back in that time of
our life, we didn't get hammered or anything. I had
to walk home, so too crazy. Yeah, I wanted to
(10:13):
be able to get there. So it's probably about two
miles from my house. Two and a half. I don't
know right around there. It's not that far, but I
don't know if I'm not trying to walk it. Yeah,
after a couple of hours in the pizza, like, I
don't walk too far.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
This is great.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah, so we're walking back. It was nice. It was
a nice evening and everything had great food, good time.
Feeling good walking back and if anybody is familiar with
the interlocked area, there's Tom's Food marketing on one side
and gas station other side of the road. There's like
(10:50):
a used to be a different grocery store called Ricks.
There's a couple of little stores in there. There's a
Mexican restaurant now weed shop, but in that that parking lot.
On the other side, there's a bank ah right up
by the road. And we get about halfway from the
restaurant to the bank where this ATM machine is, drive
(11:12):
up ATM machine, and that's when the happens in the insides,
and I'm like, oh, okay, so we're gonna walk a
little faster. Now you're looking around not yet. No, I'm
just like, okay, I can feel this where there's the
warning that was a good pizza, is what I'm telling myself,
the real good pizza. Get closer and closer. Yep. It's
(11:37):
like we get to that big parking lot with the bank,
which is like the closest part to you know, walking
from that way, and I'm like, like we were just
talking about you just can't you have to stop walking
and clench because otherwise it just has a mind of
its own. Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I
(12:00):
probably made that sound many times.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
So your date, yes I dated for a while. You're
going to move into a place together.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
So yeah, we find out sometime soon that we're having
my fifteen year old son. He wasn't fifteen when he
was born. That's now the mother, the mother of your
child even yeah, the future soon to be future.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So she's with you, and is she concerned, like, hey, man,
she feeling okay, or she's hearing these noises too, or
you just like, I don't give.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
A f I think she's laughing at me because she
thinks it's hilarious and it is. I've dealt with bubble
guts my entire life, like just just something that comes
with my family.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
Everybody has this issue.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
So we're doing the walk stop and it's like you
sin theirny hold everything, and then all of a sudden
they kind of like openside you and you're like, okay,
I get a couple more steps in. You're like going,
and I'm like I'm like thinking, like okay, this gas
station is a bathroom and it's right there, but when
(13:03):
this is happening right there is way over, like it's
it's not just right there, you know, it's in it's
in eyesight, not close enough. You're not gonna make it
so my this you know it's in the evening now,
you know, sunset time, beautiful sunset happening.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
It's in exact time happening, and it's in June since
they hear is like ten pm.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
Yeah, so it was I remember what I think it
was spring. That's why we decided to walk. So we're like, hey,
it's kind of warm today, like you know whatever, but yeah,
so doing the stop and go like can't walk no more?
Oh okay, And I'm like, okay, Rick's Guests or grocery
(13:51):
store doesn't exist anymore. Rest in peace, it's a bookstore. Now.
I don't think you can use that restroom anymore. It's
completely gone because of this incident. Probably the ATM machine
is still there. I use it regularly. That machine has
a restroom in uh no that day. It was purposed
(14:12):
for that. So, oh, I'm getting to where now we're
walking not on the side of the road. We're walking
through the parking lot, straight towards where I think the
closest bathroom is. But I we're like walking adjacent to
this bank. It's ATM machine is like fifteen feet to
my left, and my body just goes this is how
(14:36):
far you get to go? Like, you don't go further.
This is the end of the road for this bowel movement. Like,
you don't move it any further, You're done. Yeah, literally,
And so I look around, I'm like, what is the
most cover I can find in this very exposed area
(14:59):
in the middle of a parking lot, And there are
these cement posts. Yeah, there's like these four cement posts
around this ATM machine that's not connected to the building.
Like that's all I got, Like there's nothing else. It's
(15:20):
either right in the middle.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
The song give Me Shelter from the Stones that's playing
in my mind right now.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Yeah. So I don't know how, but it was like
one leap over and just drop trow And I don't
even want to describe it for you. Just you heard
that Purple Rain song. This is chocolate Rain is rain.
(15:47):
So the X is she laughing her fucking hand's not
like doing cover for you? No, No, she is dying,
laughing just like like can't breathe. Yeah, we don't have
we have. I have my like shorts in my shirt
and my wallet on me like that's that's it. Like
(16:10):
I don't even think she brought her purse because I
was paying for everything, Like we have nothing other than
the food there wanting out of my body up. So
that's the later in the story. So in the process,
I literally ship on the ATM, Like literally on the ATM.
(16:31):
I didn't try. I did my best. There's no Trumps.
There's money, you're saying, there's no This was way before
Trump was even Trump President of twenty twenty, wasn't he
Or is that the year he left office? No, that
was that was Thanksgiving. This is before my son was born.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
So this is.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Sixteen years ago. Yeah, okay, yeah, sixteen years ago. Wow.
So it was something like that. Who it was Bush.
But there was no bushes, money, there was no bumpers
to grab like there was there was nothing.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
There were the posts. There's an ATM machine that when
there and.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Just relieved as much pressure as I could so I
could then walk. But what do you clean up with
There's there's nothing, And I'm like, so I'm gonna have
to get to a bathroom to clean up? Do I
do that? Do I do? I? Use? Like all this
is running through my head. Well my everything is running
(17:28):
out of my ass. So it's happening all at the
same time. That's a tough one.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
That's why you keep toilet paper in your car now
and don't walk the places.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
Yeah, as much as possible, or just make sure I
know where the cover is at all times, like some
like combat vets do that. They just need to know
where there's always cover just in case something happens. People
to the wall. I just need to know the same way.
But he just looks for a restroom. If there's no
other option, Can I jump behind that bookcase and okay,
(17:57):
there's paper around so I can at least clean up
enough to Yeah. So that's you know, it's constantly going
through my head now for the last sixteen years because
this traumatic event. Damn. Yeah. So that happens and I
finished enough to be able to move again, because you
get to remember, I was immobilized by this bowel movement supposedly. Yeah,
(18:21):
people are gonna listen, They're gonna know other people have
done this. I mean, yeah, just your husband said, He's like, no,
I get it. He's like, you get that where you
get to the point where you literally can't move. All
you can do is stand there. If you don't want
it to come out, all you can do is stand
there and pray. And he looked down at you, like
(18:42):
you did this to yourself man to pizza boy exactly.
You thought you'd like ice cream, but I just now
made you lack toast in tolerant. So no shame, Like
the shame's already came and gone. It doesn't really even matter,
Like it's just where it's She's laughing, and I'm like
(19:02):
all right, dripping on your leg, Yeah, pretty much, you know,
pull up your I'm like, okay, these these underwear never
gonna be the same again. I'm gonna toss it whatever, So,
you know, make my way across the parking lot, go
into the grocery store. I'm sure everybody knew, like it
was whatever, and they're probably like, yeah, and I just
(19:23):
gotta do that bathroom and I got another mile to
walk home, and so just through those shorts. I needed
the shorts to get home at least, so underwear in
the just done. Rah that poor because you know, like
the new kid that's working there is who does the
trash at night. I'm thinking about all of this as
(19:47):
I'm doing it. But I'm like, do I walk out
with literal ship dripping underwear?
Speaker 3 (19:54):
No?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
No, no, no, the whole trash out with you. You
guys got a spot for this needs to go? Like
that'd have been a nice thing to do.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
It probably would have, but I was just like, all right,
put those in there, wipe up as much as I can.
You're not getting it all out until the shower happens
at home, so just try and inconspicuously leave because that
bathroom is just on the other side of the building.
Like you have to walk to the one end of
the building from where I was and then go in
(20:25):
and it's back on the other side of the building.
So and everybody's just looking at you. They know, people
have noses like it happens. You know, it's whatever.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
I bet that you felt so good when you got
home and in the shower, out of the shower and
you're like laying their normal clothes and like your stomach's
come down a bit. You felt like this is great,
Like I was in shit storm earlier. Ye now, like
I'm relaxed and this is great that happens.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
It's a relief. It's like I can't believe that happened
to me. It's just moving on with my life now,
you know. So I wonder like during the Bible days,
what did they do? The story's not over yet. Oh
oh yeah, sorry, you have to fast forward an entire day. Okay,
this is a Friday night. This happened. He got you
on video. So we were staying with my parents while
(21:15):
we were trying to get an apartment. Dad comes home
from work. He works in interlocking happens to do all
of their business banking at that bank. He said he
was dropping off their deposit that morning, and the bank
teller lady goes, You're never gonna believe what happened. He's like,
what because I tried to tell nobody, like she knew.
(21:39):
I don't think there's anybody home, got in and cleaned
it up, done like whatever. And so he's telling everybody
at the house. So the bank lady's like, you're never
gonna believe what happened. Someone shit all over the ATM.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
He's like, are you kidding me?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
When last night?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
We came in today and there was.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
This ship all over the ATM obviously, and I was like,
oh my god, there was remember are you guys like
before the bear video was like, oh the police came
back or whatever they called the police, and that was
like a thing. So that's why I like, when you
guys try to scare me out, you get to be
(22:22):
better than that. I'm not missed already. Yeah, So, I mean,
I don't think there was a video, But because do
you want to go and turn yourself in. No, I
think there's statute of limitations that was almost sixteen years ago.
You can still let him close the case.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
If there's a detective out there, like he keeps getting
this ship file, like keep having to look into it.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
He has an alcohol problem now because you couldn't figure
it out. There's like ship accidents everywhere. They called this
guy in because the sixteen years ago. He's got to
tie it all together. And that's what's really screwing him
over at night course, it's a disc golf course in
Traverse City was very similar to this one.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
It's like it's like like a map of the area
and he's got got little.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Pins in it, push pins. Because that's the best part
is that incident is about a ten minute drive or
less from this incident.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I think he moved up to toilet paper. He's using
toilet paper now there was a dog. He's just changing
his tactics.
Speaker 6 (23:35):
So yeah, and Jesse always says, he goes, I don't know,
but this is what happens when them situations come.
Speaker 5 (23:47):
He's like, no, it's not just like a little poop.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
No, He's like, it's like everything is coming out twenty years.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Twenty years ago and up to like five what you
ate five minutes ago. Somehow it makes it from your
mouth to your ass. It's like it's magic. It's there
and all of it wants out right now. Now it
has to go.
Speaker 7 (24:18):
So oh some of our incidents, well but Jesse have
been like in the car right, so all of a sudden,
easily along until we're getting home.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
Oh yeah, and then you sitting on one.
Speaker 5 (24:31):
But cheek and he's like, you gotta drive faster. Have
the police follow you into the driveway.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
And one time this happened to my kid in the
exact same spot as the ATM incident of two thousand
and nine, like to murder off and I'm driving through
interlock and speed limit forty five and he's like, I'm
going to pull my past, and I'm like, I got you, bro,
I know, I know what's happening. And so we're doing
eighty miles an hour on those forty five like we go,
(25:03):
we're Goway and we get there. He made it because
because I know I have the sympathy. When he says
I'm gonna ship my pants, I'm like, you have my guts,
I get it. We're gonna do what it takes. I
was like, And if the cops are behind us when
we're pulling in that parking or in the driveway, go
I will deal with them. So that's happened since I
(25:30):
think he was like seven or eight years old.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Yeah, maybe you guys watched the show on Max called
The Bad Monkey.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
Oh, I haven't actually seen it yet.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
There's a scene with Vince Vaughn and the other guy
I can't remember his name. He's in some other stuff Blackbirds,
I don't remember. But yeah, anyway, there's a very similar
scene where he's like, oh, no, I'm gonna ship my
pants and I was like, no, holdly, He's like no,
I'm past that level.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
He's like I'm shitting right now.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Or something like that. Yeah, yep, And I couldn't understand it.
And the guy's like no, no, like it's it's too
late for that.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
And so this has been a problem in my life
for a very long time, and it's something that I
had to intentionally kind of start to figure out a
diet around as a sober adult. And it's only really
started to come into control ish within like the last year.
(26:27):
Now I am turning thirty eight very soon, so I
wait to your forties buddy. Oh, I just.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
That's where it's all went downhill for Jesse.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
But also we I mean backlog to his story is
that every log.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Or back back.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
So some information on Jesse's defense is that he has
had problems ever since.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
He was put on a very large number of a diuretic.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
So the direct ever made me ship.
Speaker 5 (27:01):
Oh but he was on five thousand milligrams.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
Okay, I don't even know, because I've been done diuretics before.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
It never excuses.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
But I don't know what miller I can't remember.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
But anyway, I think you guys have soft butthole clinchers.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
Yeah, it's possible. I feel like mine could. Like I
think some stuff though, because it's been worked out so much.
Whoa like?
Speaker 8 (27:25):
Like hell, they call what they called the they call
it anal, call it the king, they call it something cutter.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
What what is that? I've never heard of the cutter
muscle turn cutter, turn cutter. Yeah, there you go, that's
your turn cutter has been worked out somewhere. I felt
like it was like stronger than most. And yeah, I
don't think you guys are weak.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Oh no, I guess when I get the first bubble,
I'm to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
Oh yeah, I don't. I don't play no anymore. Yeah no,
I think I think it's a disability. Oh yeah, I
think we should have like that added to the list
of disabilities. Yeah, I have a whole list of what
do we call it though, bird cutter, weak fisher, deficient
(28:19):
turn cutter.
Speaker 5 (28:22):
Where is it? Like that muscle is just broke after
so allowed to.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
Take what if you want to ask for surgery on it? Like, hey,
I need to tighten this up because I just can't
hold these in. Did you see the.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
Mad shitter story from twenty twenty, Yeah, that was me,
the Thanksgiving shit incident of twenty twenty and the ATM
of the Great ATM. You see the detective Murdo's report,
That was me, Oh yeah, so this is Yeah.
Speaker 5 (28:56):
Let's met your fellow bumper grabber.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I know, I hadn't heard of bumper grabbing before and
when he because he said that, and I was like, dude, yes,
Thanksgiving twenty twenty, and that's not the only time, because
bumpers are easy to grab and you know, because you
put you in the prime squatting position, the movement that
(29:18):
people on the podcast didn't understand. But he put his
hands out in front of him like he's grabbing a
bumper and then he like didn't like, like you're bending
because of what you need to do. This is how
it works. If you just stand there and poop, you're
going to get the liquid stuff because it's what we're
talking about here on your pants, your underwear and or
(29:39):
your shoes. So you have to get as much horizontal
space that you can from your feet to where your
butthole is. Okay, yeah, kind of like you're you're simulating
a toilet that's not really there to put it in
(29:59):
your your mind, your your body, and but you know
you have gravity, so you have to hold on to
something and that's where the bumpers come in because they're
just they're perfect height, they're perfect strength. Get a whole
car in front of you, shelter hopefully it's Thanksgiving and
there's snow.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Now you can do your normal routine in these emergency situations.
Or is it just like whipped down as far as
you can get them, Like you're not like taking all
your pants off or your shorts for that one at
the ATM incident, Like you didn't take your shorts completely off.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
No. But one of the emergencies I've had since the
bear incident, the original like what the bears, the disc
golf incident.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
With the same person. I had another incident later.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
On, and that one was there was deep woods very
close to the road, and I was like, guys, we're
just not making it home, So pulling over and I
literally ran into the woods to where I couldn't see anybody,
but we weren't at can't move anymore. Time we were
(31:06):
at I could run into the woods time, but I
knew it was coming, Like does it happen enough times?
Like you know, like the what was that the minutes
to midnight time tick? Yeah? That the ticker? Anyway, that time,
it all just came off and then you're kind of free.
You can kind of like star out, spread your legs
(31:29):
and just kind of bend over a little bit. That
a wolf.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Branches breaking the smoker's dog.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
So the X that you were with, would you say
that you guys didn't make it because you got tired
of your ship?
Speaker 1 (31:44):
She was pretty shitty. It's not you were shitty. Yeah, no,
I don't think that's why. But because we still like
we had an entire child after.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
That, I know many more ships were taken a lot,
a lot. He's probably like like a documentary about you
one day. She's gonna be on there, like, yeah, I
really love Mitch Budd just shit everywhere, Like I mean
in the woods, at the ATM it's a disco haf
I mean baseball park, you name it, madshit in it.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
That'd be so funny. She said that, like I loved him.
I like, I appreciate you bringing up baseball parks because
that is a really good problem solving skill to have
when you have this problem, because there have been many
times where I'm like, I'm not gonna make it to
the next gas station.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
I'm not gonna make it home. I'm not gonna make it.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
To the next store.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
Oh there's a little league game going on over there.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
There's a portat perfect let's whip it in there. And
you get so many dirty looks from the parents because
you're just this dude. Nobody knows you just run from
your car. This guy's newspaper with him. Yeah, roller toilet paper,
little kids knocking on the door.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
Occupied to be a minute, get out of your little shit. Yeah,
it's funny. It's kind of funny and sad. Earlier today
I thought about you, Mitch. I went to our oral
surgeon's place, that's the other end, and I, well, here's
the thing. I walk in and I almost came back
(33:19):
to the office to peek because we were at an
event that we had to do and we were there
together and we came you came back here whatever, And
I just went there and I thought, man, I really
need to pee before I get this stuff done.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
I don't whatever, I'm just go on.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
So I walk in and boom, I see two bathrooms.
I thought, wow, okay, I'll just be here. I'm glad
I didn't go back to the office. But going there
and I pee, and I'm thinking, you know, these are
up kept. I thought, man, I should tell mich about this, okay,
because they could just walk right in the building.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
We say, they're not in the office in the building.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
Yeah, so, and then you could always play it off
later like oh, I was just coming to check my
appointment time.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
I figured I would just I was in the neighborhood.
I would come by instead a call man. This could
this could work as an emergency place get blacklisted from
or I think that would be brown listed from places
where you can.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
I mean, I don't know, those oral surgeon fees aren't cheap.
We paid for that toilet paper.
Speaker 1 (34:15):
You can't kick me out of here. I own that
toilet paper, leave with it. Yeah, leave with the toilet
paper doing this with me? So yeah, there was There's
been just so many, so many stories, and I just
feel like I had to let that one air out
a little bit because I don't know. I'm what it
(34:37):
is is, it's a challenge to the public if you
have a better shit story than the ATM.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Emil Mitch m ip at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh, I need a name for the incident, like mine
is the ATM disaster of two thousand and nine, and
then a description of what happens. I'll keep your name
out of it, but we'll read it on the podcast
if you're proud want to own it, and that's fine too,
which I think you should because it's your body. It's
your You should be proud of the body that you
live in.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
If you want to be on Bumper Buddies podcast, you're
going to have to come up with a good one,
not just letting any shit in.
Speaker 9 (35:17):
Oh my gosh, I was thinking it'd be better if
it wasn't Jesse and his name started with a B,
because we could be the bm Brad.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
And Mitchell the BMS.
Speaker 5 (35:35):
He's probably gonna be mortified.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
You talked about what you say, well, like, well Mitch's
is or I mean, because I really don't know what
kind of animals cleaned up after me. I can't tell
you that there were stains that were there for more
than a short amount of time, and probably no animals
(35:59):
because you have dogs, Like that's dogs are dirty.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
That's horrible.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
And then's one thing I can keep thinking of. It's
a wooded area, so there could have been so many
things that oh, yeah, but they're not gonna, yeah, there
are at least all night.
Speaker 5 (36:18):
They're not gonna get in your car and like breathe
out your windows.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
We didn't talk about that part of your story. People
don't know what you're talking.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
The funniest part of the story is, and I don't
want to speak for Jesse's story, but it was an
incident and then there was a dog, and there's some
bumper grabbing, and then that was the person leaving, and
then the dog besides he's gone, then jumps in the
car with Corey Smoker and I just see this dog
right next to your face from the back seat, jumping
(36:47):
up on the the seat and just.
Speaker 5 (36:55):
And it's just.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
After eating a dog turd or a human turd.
Speaker 5 (37:00):
It was mortifying.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Probably should have just dripped down his face, like literally.
Speaker 4 (37:11):
Yeah, just a big old grin happy to be in
the car and just can't stick their head out that window.
Speaker 5 (37:18):
Got us to like get up over my shoulder and
the driver window and stick.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
I was so happy to see you. I had to
see you all day.
Speaker 3 (37:25):
It was like, Mom, you're never gonna believe.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Look what I had. Daddy gave me a treat.
Speaker 5 (37:30):
Yeah, and I'm just all the way to Honor, which
is a little bit of a drive from there. I
didn't know what to do.
Speaker 1 (37:41):
My ground zero is about halfway from where you started
your trip to Honor.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
M hm, yeah, well I appreciate you guys coming on
the podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Area dirty laundry and wrapped the ship up, and I
apologize to whatever young guy who got had to take
the trash out at Rick's Grocery that doesn't exist anymore,
that horrible night spring of two thousand and nine, and
somebody's like tuning in ago. I thought I was gonna
hear some recovery talk, like what is this? That's the
(38:13):
thing about, you know, that's how we we wrap it
back up here is you know part of recovery is
accepting the things that you can't change.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
You know where you're at now, yep, you know, and
can't change the past, and that's the shit did happen.
And you can laugh at it too, And that's the
whole recovery part of it is you're in a good
spot now and you can tell stories like this and
they're funny and you're not drunk. You don't have to
be high like. It's pretty cool yep. And we can
(38:42):
laugh that sh and have fun in recovery. That's that's
the moral of the story here. But we do have
to wrap it up, okay, but maybe we'll have the
Bumper Buddies on it again. We'll have you, actually, the
bumper buddies.
Speaker 1 (39:00):
You all have to have him weigh in.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
Yes, absolutely, to be continued, Yes, don't worry, We'll I'll
let you know when's happening.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
But yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
Thanks for listening and listen to more episodes on our
app and at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery podcast. Listen
to over nine hundred episodes on the two seventeen Recovery
app that's free in your app store or online at
two seventeen recovery dot com.
Welcome to the two seventeen Recovery Broadcast. If you don't
make mistakes, you won't learn.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
With your host Corey Winfield, you know how you know
fish is bad if you can't put it on pizza.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
It's a special guest Mitchell Obra, I.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Really hate to do listen to you guys, but I
really have to go to the app where held Dad?
Speaker 1 (00:23):
I just like, can't hold it anymore? Got your ass?
And Corey Smoker, Hey, I like the big Monsters.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
It is the twenty first of February twenty twenty five,
or half assed in it today? Should I have made
an intro with Corey's name is absolutely problem.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Well I'm getting really good excuses imprompt too.
Speaker 2 (00:47):
And well what happened was my son is coming back
from daycare and my wife Marnie had to go get them,
and so we have very little time to do this
podcast today. We got phones ringing now, I mean, people
are just not respecting our time. So didn't really have
(01:07):
time to throw it all together to make the intro
with Corey's name.
Speaker 1 (01:11):
And I apologize for that.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
Yeah, I don't feel really bad about it. I just
you know, sorry, just to the people who didn't it's
fun Friday. They'll forgive us didn't get that full open correctly.
But yeah, so how you doing, Mitch? You wanted to
talk poop today, Well.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
We talked about it the other day with a gentleman
who's out here right now about poop stories. Obviously we
should podcast this because we were sharing different because I'm
the resident senior correspondent for poop emergencies.
Speaker 2 (01:48):
Yes, and if you haven't seen Mitch's video based on
a true story, yeah, based on a true story two
seventeen Recovery dot com. You might have to go to
videos and then click more, load more whatever it says, and
then scroll down to see the bear mask and it's
called bear you.
Speaker 1 (02:03):
Get on the YouTube two seventeen Recovery doc or two
seventeen Recovery Confused right now, Mitch YouTube, I'm going to
where the YouTube at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 3 (02:12):
Yeah, yeah, I screwed that part up. I know that
be so confused.
Speaker 1 (02:16):
Yeah, if you go to the two seventeen recovery YouTube,
it's pretty easy to find. It's the only one with
the bear. Yeah, and that's I think I think it's
at two seventeen Recovery or something. I don't.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
I think we have enough people that like us, we
get our own handle or whatever it's called.
Speaker 3 (02:32):
Oh nice, Yeah, I didn't know that was the thing.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, I think YouTube dot com at two seventeen recovery
is what you Yeah.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
I still just search it.
Speaker 2 (02:43):
One day, I'm going to get this figured out and
we'll tell you exactly where to go. But yeah, what
it is on our website anyway? Yeah, Mitch, it was
based on True Story and then it turned into a
Colone commercial. But it's it's it's good and that did happen.
So Mitch has been talking about this atm story.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Well, we had.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Another person industry and I'm using air quotes here. The
industry of sex was something else? What Yeah you've never
heard that? No, wow, you never heard the have you
Cory Smokers? Now I was back in joining us. Have
you heard the adult term or if you're familiar with
(03:23):
the adult industry or the industry is what I said, right, Yeah,
they have a different name for atm oh okay, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:34):
Adult industry. But I don't know what that word is.
I mean I think I have idea what adults.
Speaker 1 (03:41):
Not? Okay, we can try to maybe this isn't that
kind of story.
Speaker 4 (03:51):
Sometimes they assume all black people are from African America.
Speaker 3 (03:56):
Okay, I could have just said.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
We've ever to find that button too, but no. But
because Mitch was talking about because we're talking poop stories,
Mitch really wanted to talk about poop stories with her.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
Husband, and we were going back and forth, and I
was like, I have the poop story to end all
poop stories, and I just can't believe that it hasn't come.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Up and conversate and then he says to me about ATM,
and I'm like, hmm.
Speaker 1 (04:23):
It's not an adult industry. Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
I was like, because you were like you were like
so excited to tell it, I'm like, no way, we'll
do on the.
Speaker 5 (04:29):
Podcast like ATM where you go get.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Money it was one of those, or ATM as you
go get booty to lips.
Speaker 4 (04:41):
Sometimes they assume all black people are from African America.
Speaker 2 (04:44):
I really wanted her to say it, Mitchell. She was
thinking Will's returning. Did you know what that meant? No? Wise, anyway,
all right, so covert. So the money ATM is what
we're talking about.
Speaker 3 (04:57):
Yeah, ATM Machine Automatic.
Speaker 5 (05:01):
You drive up with your car, Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Braille yeah, the story was told about your husband Corey
and grabbing bumpers. I've never had to do that. Knock
on wood. Mitch immediately knew what grabbing bumper meant, and
he was like, oh god, yeah. He started telling a
story when he went to his family's Thanksgiving or Christmas
or twenty yeah, some holiday gathering. As he's holding the
(05:25):
sweet potatoes in one hand and the bumper and the
other just letting.
Speaker 1 (05:29):
It rips right by his don't look behind his aunt's vehicle,
not even his own Honda.
Speaker 5 (05:35):
Do you know what's funny to me?
Speaker 4 (05:36):
I just put this all togethers So Jesse was sick
with COVID bumper grabbing, and you're in the COVID twenty
twenty bumper grabbed.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
Yeah, yeah, I didn't have COVID at the time. Just
bumper Buddies.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Yeah, you guys should get his shirts and sell of them.
We could wait for that bumper Body Bumper Buddies podcast
to come.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Out in the last three months. It'll be great and
just pictures.
Speaker 2 (06:01):
Of people shitting all across the United States in America's
gonna be did.
Speaker 1 (06:07):
To us both ways, like holding a bumper squat it down,
but from the side, so you can't actually see anything explicit,
kind of like Jackass doing slow mo.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
Maybe we should get you guys the little hitch that
hooks into the back of your truck and you can
the toilet.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
There was a comment about that Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1 (06:31):
Hmmm, yeah, well then don't say you guys like you're
done out Jesse and Midge. That's that's what she meant. Yeah,
I want you to throw me in that. I want
people thinking that I'm grabbing bumbers. I walked. It's the
easiest way if you're in a pinch. There was no
pinching that could happen at that point, Like, man.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
I still am.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
I'm left stuck at the part where you're like I
could not move any muscle.
Speaker 1 (06:58):
Anybody has been there, they know exactly what I'm talking about.
I was the pinching, Like I said, the clenching was
happening the whole way to Thanksgiving, which was.
Speaker 3 (07:10):
About it sounded like that.
Speaker 1 (07:13):
And they got out of the car and my kid
with me, ten, stood up, and that was when my
body was like, Nope, this is happening now.
Speaker 3 (07:28):
And the hoover dam was not holding this back.
Speaker 1 (07:32):
Oh my god, and this is this happened during the
ATM story where you just get to a point where
you cannot take another step without excreting.
Speaker 3 (07:49):
Wow, yeah, and it happens.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
See, this is what we need to talk to a
logan about. Oh yeah, like where where did it really
start going wrong? Wasn't your dad's drinking or your dad's pooping?
So him and I had this conversation yesterday over text message.
He's trying to get out of school because he had
a tummy ache. Oh yeah, yeah, And I was like,
I was like, buddy, I've had these guts for thirty
(08:15):
eight years. You're gonna have to run to the bathroom
and deal with it. You'll be fine, It'll be fine.
Go poop a couple times, you'll be fine. An hour
and a half later, after arguing with him, he goes,
by the way, you're right, Yeah, I feel a lot better, Like, yeah,
I know, but dealing this, dealing with this for a
long time, runs in the family, runs in the jeans,
(08:37):
as they say, not in the.
Speaker 2 (08:42):
Jeans, jeans, And obviously Anti's car behind it. All right,
So you're gonna te us about the ATM story then.
Speaker 1 (08:53):
Yeah, So this is a pre sober Mitchell. This is
pre child Mitchell. Actually I was with his mother. We
were dating.
Speaker 3 (09:01):
Oh, this is a great story, and there's.
Speaker 1 (09:04):
A restaurant in Interlocking we decided to walk to because
I was living out there at the time. I think
we're getting ready to look for an apartment, is what
it was. Sort of staying with my family for a
short period of time while we were doing like apartment applications.
So we're like, hey, let's go to this. We'll walk
down to this restaurant. It'll be nice evening, it'd be great.
So go down there, and it's one of the nicer
(09:27):
ones in the area. And they have like a little
bar area, but they have really good food and all
sorts of you can get lobster tail at a bar,
pizza if you want to, a burger or a steak,
like you all sorts of stuff. I don't think i'd
in this place.
Speaker 3 (09:43):
Yeah, yeah, I don't want to New York.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
They're not a sponsor, so don't want to talk. I
don't remember their name. It's like there's outside seating, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3 (09:50):
Yeah, which there's a couple of them like that.
Speaker 1 (09:52):
But anyway, I've been at one of them. It was
all right. Yeah, And so we go down there I
order a pizza, she orders whatever, chicken sandwich or some stuff,
and it comes time to you know, I have a
couple of beers. You know, back in that time of
our life, we didn't get hammered or anything. I had
to walk home, so too crazy. Yeah, I wanted to
(10:13):
be able to get there. So it's probably about two
miles from my house. Two and a half. I don't
know right around there. It's not that far, but I
don't know if I'm not trying to walk it. Yeah,
after a couple of hours in the pizza, like, I
don't walk too far.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
This is great.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
Yeah, so we're walking back. It was nice. It was
a nice evening and everything had great food, good time.
Feeling good walking back and if anybody is familiar with
the interlocked area, there's Tom's Food marketing on one side
and gas station other side of the road. There's like
(10:50):
a used to be a different grocery store called Ricks.
There's a couple of little stores in there. There's a
Mexican restaurant now weed shop, but in that that parking lot.
On the other side, there's a bank ah right up
by the road. And we get about halfway from the
restaurant to the bank where this ATM machine is, drive
(11:12):
up ATM machine, and that's when the happens in the insides,
and I'm like, oh, okay, so we're gonna walk a
little faster. Now you're looking around not yet. No, I'm
just like, okay, I can feel this where there's the
warning that was a good pizza, is what I'm telling myself,
the real good pizza. Get closer and closer. Yep. It's
(11:37):
like we get to that big parking lot with the bank,
which is like the closest part to you know, walking
from that way, and I'm like, like we were just
talking about you just can't you have to stop walking
and clench because otherwise it just has a mind of
its own. Oh yeah, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I
(12:00):
probably made that sound many times.
Speaker 2 (12:03):
So your date, yes I dated for a while. You're
going to move into a place together.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
So yeah, we find out sometime soon that we're having
my fifteen year old son. He wasn't fifteen when he
was born. That's now the mother, the mother of your
child even yeah, the future soon to be future.
Speaker 2 (12:21):
So she's with you, and is she concerned, like, hey, man,
she feeling okay, or she's hearing these noises too, or
you just like, I don't give.
Speaker 1 (12:26):
A f I think she's laughing at me because she
thinks it's hilarious and it is. I've dealt with bubble
guts my entire life, like just just something that comes
with my family.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
Everybody has this issue.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
So we're doing the walk stop and it's like you
sin theirny hold everything, and then all of a sudden
they kind of like openside you and you're like, okay,
I get a couple more steps in. You're like going,
and I'm like I'm like thinking, like okay, this gas
station is a bathroom and it's right there, but when
(13:03):
this is happening right there is way over, like it's
it's not just right there, you know, it's in it's
in eyesight, not close enough. You're not gonna make it
so my this you know it's in the evening now,
you know, sunset time, beautiful sunset happening.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
It's in exact time happening, and it's in June since
they hear is like ten pm.
Speaker 1 (13:28):
Yeah, so it was I remember what I think it
was spring. That's why we decided to walk. So we're like, hey,
it's kind of warm today, like you know whatever, but yeah,
so doing the stop and go like can't walk no more?
Oh okay, And I'm like, okay, Rick's Guests or grocery
(13:51):
store doesn't exist anymore. Rest in peace, it's a bookstore. Now.
I don't think you can use that restroom anymore. It's
completely gone because of this incident. Probably the ATM machine
is still there. I use it regularly. That machine has
a restroom in uh no that day. It was purposed
(14:12):
for that. So, oh, I'm getting to where now we're
walking not on the side of the road. We're walking
through the parking lot, straight towards where I think the
closest bathroom is. But I we're like walking adjacent to
this bank. It's ATM machine is like fifteen feet to
my left, and my body just goes this is how
(14:36):
far you get to go? Like, you don't go further.
This is the end of the road for this bowel movement. Like,
you don't move it any further, You're done. Yeah, literally,
And so I look around, I'm like, what is the
most cover I can find in this very exposed area
(14:59):
in the middle of a parking lot, And there are
these cement posts. Yeah, there's like these four cement posts
around this ATM machine that's not connected to the building.
Like that's all I got, Like there's nothing else. It's
(15:20):
either right in the middle.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
The song give Me Shelter from the Stones that's playing
in my mind right now.
Speaker 1 (15:25):
Yeah. So I don't know how, but it was like
one leap over and just drop trow And I don't
even want to describe it for you. Just you heard
that Purple Rain song. This is chocolate Rain is rain.
(15:47):
So the X is she laughing her fucking hand's not
like doing cover for you? No, No, she is dying,
laughing just like like can't breathe. Yeah, we don't have
we have. I have my like shorts in my shirt
and my wallet on me like that's that's it. Like
(16:10):
I don't even think she brought her purse because I
was paying for everything, Like we have nothing other than
the food there wanting out of my body up. So
that's the later in the story. So in the process,
I literally ship on the ATM, Like literally on the ATM.
(16:31):
I didn't try. I did my best. There's no Trumps.
There's money, you're saying, there's no This was way before
Trump was even Trump President of twenty twenty, wasn't he
Or is that the year he left office? No, that
was that was Thanksgiving. This is before my son was born.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
So this is.
Speaker 1 (16:48):
Sixteen years ago. Yeah, okay, yeah, sixteen years ago. Wow.
So it was something like that. Who it was Bush.
But there was no bushes, money, there was no bumpers
to grab like there was there was nothing.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
There were the posts. There's an ATM machine that when
there and.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Just relieved as much pressure as I could so I
could then walk. But what do you clean up with
There's there's nothing, And I'm like, so I'm gonna have
to get to a bathroom to clean up? Do I
do that? Do I do? I? Use? Like all this
is running through my head. Well my everything is running
(17:28):
out of my ass. So it's happening all at the
same time. That's a tough one.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
That's why you keep toilet paper in your car now
and don't walk the places.
Speaker 1 (17:36):
Yeah, as much as possible, or just make sure I
know where the cover is at all times, like some
like combat vets do that. They just need to know
where there's always cover just in case something happens. People
to the wall. I just need to know the same way.
But he just looks for a restroom. If there's no
other option, Can I jump behind that bookcase and okay,
(17:57):
there's paper around so I can at least clean up
enough to Yeah. So that's you know, it's constantly going
through my head now for the last sixteen years because
this traumatic event. Damn. Yeah. So that happens and I
finished enough to be able to move again, because you
get to remember, I was immobilized by this bowel movement supposedly. Yeah,
(18:21):
people are gonna listen, They're gonna know other people have
done this. I mean, yeah, just your husband said, He's like, no,
I get it. He's like, you get that where you
get to the point where you literally can't move. All
you can do is stand there. If you don't want
it to come out, all you can do is stand
there and pray. And he looked down at you, like
(18:42):
you did this to yourself man to pizza boy exactly.
You thought you'd like ice cream, but I just now
made you lack toast in tolerant. So no shame, Like
the shame's already came and gone. It doesn't really even matter,
Like it's just where it's She's laughing, and I'm like
(19:02):
all right, dripping on your leg, Yeah, pretty much, you know,
pull up your I'm like, okay, these these underwear never
gonna be the same again. I'm gonna toss it whatever, So,
you know, make my way across the parking lot, go
into the grocery store. I'm sure everybody knew, like it
was whatever, and they're probably like, yeah, and I just
(19:23):
gotta do that bathroom and I got another mile to
walk home, and so just through those shorts. I needed
the shorts to get home at least, so underwear in
the just done. Rah that poor because you know, like
the new kid that's working there is who does the
trash at night. I'm thinking about all of this as
(19:47):
I'm doing it. But I'm like, do I walk out
with literal ship dripping underwear?
Speaker 3 (19:54):
No?
Speaker 2 (19:54):
No, no, no, the whole trash out with you. You
guys got a spot for this needs to go? Like
that'd have been a nice thing to do.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
It probably would have, but I was just like, all right,
put those in there, wipe up as much as I can.
You're not getting it all out until the shower happens
at home, so just try and inconspicuously leave because that
bathroom is just on the other side of the building.
Like you have to walk to the one end of
the building from where I was and then go in
(20:25):
and it's back on the other side of the building.
So and everybody's just looking at you. They know, people
have noses like it happens. You know, it's whatever.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
I bet that you felt so good when you got
home and in the shower, out of the shower and
you're like laying their normal clothes and like your stomach's
come down a bit. You felt like this is great,
Like I was in shit storm earlier. Ye now, like
I'm relaxed and this is great that happens.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
It's a relief. It's like I can't believe that happened
to me. It's just moving on with my life now,
you know. So I wonder like during the Bible days,
what did they do? The story's not over yet. Oh
oh yeah, sorry, you have to fast forward an entire day. Okay,
this is a Friday night. This happened. He got you
on video. So we were staying with my parents while
(21:15):
we were trying to get an apartment. Dad comes home
from work. He works in interlocking happens to do all
of their business banking at that bank. He said he
was dropping off their deposit that morning, and the bank
teller lady goes, You're never gonna believe what happened. He's like,
what because I tried to tell nobody, like she knew.
(21:39):
I don't think there's anybody home, got in and cleaned
it up, done like whatever. And so he's telling everybody
at the house. So the bank lady's like, you're never
gonna believe what happened. Someone shit all over the ATM.
Speaker 3 (21:56):
He's like, are you kidding me?
Speaker 1 (21:58):
When last night?
Speaker 3 (22:00):
We came in today and there was.
Speaker 1 (22:01):
This ship all over the ATM obviously, and I was like,
oh my god, there was remember are you guys like
before the bear video was like, oh the police came
back or whatever they called the police, and that was
like a thing. So that's why I like, when you
guys try to scare me out, you get to be
(22:22):
better than that. I'm not missed already. Yeah, So, I mean,
I don't think there was a video, But because do
you want to go and turn yourself in. No, I
think there's statute of limitations that was almost sixteen years ago.
You can still let him close the case.
Speaker 2 (22:42):
If there's a detective out there, like he keeps getting
this ship file, like keep having to look into it.
Speaker 1 (22:45):
He has an alcohol problem now because you couldn't figure
it out. There's like ship accidents everywhere. They called this
guy in because the sixteen years ago. He's got to
tie it all together. And that's what's really screwing him
over at night course, it's a disc golf course in
Traverse City was very similar to this one.
Speaker 2 (23:05):
It's like it's like like a map of the area
and he's got got little.
Speaker 1 (23:09):
Pins in it, push pins. Because that's the best part
is that incident is about a ten minute drive or
less from this incident.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
I think he moved up to toilet paper. He's using
toilet paper now there was a dog. He's just changing
his tactics.
Speaker 6 (23:35):
So yeah, and Jesse always says, he goes, I don't know,
but this is what happens when them situations come.
Speaker 5 (23:47):
He's like, no, it's not just like a little poop.
Speaker 4 (23:51):
No, He's like, it's like everything is coming out twenty years.
Speaker 1 (23:56):
Twenty years ago and up to like five what you
ate five minutes ago. Somehow it makes it from your
mouth to your ass. It's like it's magic. It's there
and all of it wants out right now. Now it
has to go.
Speaker 7 (24:18):
So oh some of our incidents, well but Jesse have
been like in the car right, so all of a sudden,
easily along until we're getting home.
Speaker 1 (24:29):
Oh yeah, and then you sitting on one.
Speaker 5 (24:31):
But cheek and he's like, you gotta drive faster. Have
the police follow you into the driveway.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (24:40):
And one time this happened to my kid in the
exact same spot as the ATM incident of two thousand
and nine, like to murder off and I'm driving through
interlock and speed limit forty five and he's like, I'm
going to pull my past, and I'm like, I got you, bro,
I know, I know what's happening. And so we're doing
eighty miles an hour on those forty five like we go,
(25:03):
we're Goway and we get there. He made it because
because I know I have the sympathy. When he says
I'm gonna ship my pants, I'm like, you have my guts,
I get it. We're gonna do what it takes. I
was like, And if the cops are behind us when
we're pulling in that parking or in the driveway, go
I will deal with them. So that's happened since I
(25:30):
think he was like seven or eight years old.
Speaker 2 (25:32):
Yeah, maybe you guys watched the show on Max called
The Bad Monkey.
Speaker 3 (25:38):
Oh, I haven't actually seen it yet.
Speaker 2 (25:40):
There's a scene with Vince Vaughn and the other guy
I can't remember his name. He's in some other stuff Blackbirds,
I don't remember. But yeah, anyway, there's a very similar
scene where he's like, oh, no, I'm gonna ship my
pants and I was like, no, holdly, He's like no,
I'm past that level.
Speaker 3 (25:58):
He's like I'm shitting right now.
Speaker 2 (26:00):
Or something like that. Yeah, yep, And I couldn't understand it.
And the guy's like no, no, like it's it's too
late for that.
Speaker 1 (26:06):
And so this has been a problem in my life
for a very long time, and it's something that I
had to intentionally kind of start to figure out a
diet around as a sober adult. And it's only really
started to come into control ish within like the last year.
(26:27):
Now I am turning thirty eight very soon, so I
wait to your forties buddy. Oh, I just.
Speaker 5 (26:34):
That's where it's all went downhill for Jesse.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
But also we I mean backlog to his story is
that every log.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
Or back back.
Speaker 4 (26:47):
So some information on Jesse's defense is that he has
had problems ever since.
Speaker 5 (26:54):
He was put on a very large number of a diuretic.
Speaker 1 (26:58):
So the direct ever made me ship.
Speaker 5 (27:01):
Oh but he was on five thousand milligrams.
Speaker 3 (27:03):
Okay, I don't even know, because I've been done diuretics before.
Speaker 1 (27:07):
It never excuses.
Speaker 3 (27:08):
But I don't know what miller I can't remember.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
But anyway, I think you guys have soft butthole clinchers.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
Yeah, it's possible. I feel like mine could. Like I
think some stuff though, because it's been worked out so much.
Whoa like?
Speaker 8 (27:25):
Like hell, they call what they called the they call
it anal, call it the king, they call it something cutter.
Speaker 1 (27:38):
What what is that? I've never heard of the cutter
muscle turn cutter, turn cutter. Yeah, there you go, that's
your turn cutter has been worked out somewhere. I felt
like it was like stronger than most. And yeah, I
don't think you guys are weak.
Speaker 4 (27:55):
Oh no, I guess when I get the first bubble,
I'm to the bathroom.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
Oh yeah, I don't. I don't play no anymore. Yeah no,
I think I think it's a disability. Oh yeah, I
think we should have like that added to the list
of disabilities. Yeah, I have a whole list of what
do we call it though, bird cutter, weak fisher, deficient
(28:19):
turn cutter.
Speaker 5 (28:22):
Where is it? Like that muscle is just broke after
so allowed to.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
Take what if you want to ask for surgery on it? Like, hey,
I need to tighten this up because I just can't
hold these in. Did you see the.
Speaker 1 (28:36):
Mad shitter story from twenty twenty, Yeah, that was me,
the Thanksgiving shit incident of twenty twenty and the ATM
of the Great ATM. You see the detective Murdo's report,
That was me, Oh yeah, so this is Yeah.
Speaker 5 (28:56):
Let's met your fellow bumper grabber.
Speaker 1 (28:58):
I know, I hadn't heard of bumper grabbing before and
when he because he said that, and I was like, dude, yes,
Thanksgiving twenty twenty, and that's not the only time, because
bumpers are easy to grab and you know, because you
put you in the prime squatting position, the movement that
(29:18):
people on the podcast didn't understand. But he put his
hands out in front of him like he's grabbing a
bumper and then he like didn't like, like you're bending
because of what you need to do. This is how
it works. If you just stand there and poop, you're
going to get the liquid stuff because it's what we're
talking about here on your pants, your underwear and or
(29:39):
your shoes. So you have to get as much horizontal
space that you can from your feet to where your
butthole is. Okay, yeah, kind of like you're you're simulating
a toilet that's not really there to put it in
(29:59):
your your mind, your your body, and but you know
you have gravity, so you have to hold on to
something and that's where the bumpers come in because they're
just they're perfect height, they're perfect strength. Get a whole
car in front of you, shelter hopefully it's Thanksgiving and
there's snow.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Now you can do your normal routine in these emergency situations.
Or is it just like whipped down as far as
you can get them, Like you're not like taking all
your pants off or your shorts for that one at
the ATM incident, Like you didn't take your shorts completely off.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
No. But one of the emergencies I've had since the
bear incident, the original like what the bears, the disc
golf incident.
Speaker 3 (30:40):
With the same person. I had another incident later.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
On, and that one was there was deep woods very
close to the road, and I was like, guys, we're
just not making it home, So pulling over and I
literally ran into the woods to where I couldn't see anybody,
but we weren't at can't move anymore. Time we were
(31:06):
at I could run into the woods time, but I
knew it was coming, Like does it happen enough times?
Like you know, like the what was that the minutes
to midnight time tick? Yeah? That the ticker? Anyway, that time,
it all just came off and then you're kind of free.
You can kind of like star out, spread your legs
(31:29):
and just kind of bend over a little bit. That
a wolf.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
Branches breaking the smoker's dog.
Speaker 2 (31:36):
So the X that you were with, would you say
that you guys didn't make it because you got tired
of your ship?
Speaker 1 (31:44):
She was pretty shitty. It's not you were shitty. Yeah, no,
I don't think that's why. But because we still like
we had an entire child after.
Speaker 2 (31:56):
That, I know many more ships were taken a lot,
a lot. He's probably like like a documentary about you
one day. She's gonna be on there, like, yeah, I
really love Mitch Budd just shit everywhere, Like I mean
in the woods, at the ATM it's a disco haf
I mean baseball park, you name it, madshit in it.
Speaker 1 (32:18):
That'd be so funny. She said that, like I loved him.
I like, I appreciate you bringing up baseball parks because
that is a really good problem solving skill to have
when you have this problem, because there have been many
times where I'm like, I'm not gonna make it to
the next gas station.
Speaker 3 (32:34):
I'm not gonna make it home. I'm not gonna make it.
Speaker 1 (32:35):
To the next store.
Speaker 3 (32:37):
Oh there's a little league game going on over there.
Speaker 1 (32:39):
There's a portat perfect let's whip it in there. And
you get so many dirty looks from the parents because
you're just this dude. Nobody knows you just run from
your car. This guy's newspaper with him. Yeah, roller toilet paper,
little kids knocking on the door.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
Occupied to be a minute, get out of your little shit. Yeah,
it's funny. It's kind of funny and sad. Earlier today
I thought about you, Mitch. I went to our oral
surgeon's place, that's the other end, and I, well, here's
the thing. I walk in and I almost came back
(33:19):
to the office to peek because we were at an
event that we had to do and we were there
together and we came you came back here whatever, And
I just went there and I thought, man, I really
need to pee before I get this stuff done.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
I don't whatever, I'm just go on.
Speaker 2 (33:32):
So I walk in and boom, I see two bathrooms.
I thought, wow, okay, I'll just be here. I'm glad
I didn't go back to the office. But going there
and I pee, and I'm thinking, you know, these are
up kept. I thought, man, I should tell mich about this, okay,
because they could just walk right in the building.
Speaker 1 (33:49):
We say, they're not in the office in the building.
Speaker 2 (33:52):
Yeah, so, and then you could always play it off
later like oh, I was just coming to check my
appointment time.
Speaker 1 (33:57):
I figured I would just I was in the neighborhood.
I would come by instead a call man. This could
this could work as an emergency place get blacklisted from
or I think that would be brown listed from places
where you can.
Speaker 2 (34:09):
I mean, I don't know, those oral surgeon fees aren't cheap.
We paid for that toilet paper.
Speaker 1 (34:15):
You can't kick me out of here. I own that
toilet paper, leave with it. Yeah, leave with the toilet
paper doing this with me? So yeah, there was There's
been just so many, so many stories, and I just
feel like I had to let that one air out
a little bit because I don't know. I'm what it
(34:37):
is is, it's a challenge to the public if you
have a better shit story than the ATM.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Emil Mitch m ip at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 1 (34:49):
Oh, I need a name for the incident, like mine
is the ATM disaster of two thousand and nine, and
then a description of what happens. I'll keep your name
out of it, but we'll read it on the podcast
if you're proud want to own it, and that's fine too,
which I think you should because it's your body. It's
your You should be proud of the body that you
live in.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
If you want to be on Bumper Buddies podcast, you're
going to have to come up with a good one,
not just letting any shit in.
Speaker 9 (35:17):
Oh my gosh, I was thinking it'd be better if
it wasn't Jesse and his name started with a B,
because we could be the bm Brad.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
And Mitchell the BMS.
Speaker 5 (35:35):
He's probably gonna be mortified.
Speaker 1 (35:38):
You talked about what you say, well, like, well Mitch's
is or I mean, because I really don't know what
kind of animals cleaned up after me. I can't tell
you that there were stains that were there for more
than a short amount of time, and probably no animals
(35:59):
because you have dogs, Like that's dogs are dirty.
Speaker 5 (36:03):
That's horrible.
Speaker 1 (36:04):
And then's one thing I can keep thinking of. It's
a wooded area, so there could have been so many
things that oh, yeah, but they're not gonna, yeah, there
are at least all night.
Speaker 5 (36:18):
They're not gonna get in your car and like breathe
out your windows.
Speaker 1 (36:23):
We didn't talk about that part of your story. People
don't know what you're talking.
Speaker 2 (36:25):
The funniest part of the story is, and I don't
want to speak for Jesse's story, but it was an
incident and then there was a dog, and there's some
bumper grabbing, and then that was the person leaving, and
then the dog besides he's gone, then jumps in the
car with Corey Smoker and I just see this dog
right next to your face from the back seat, jumping
(36:47):
up on the the seat and just.
Speaker 5 (36:55):
And it's just.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
After eating a dog turd or a human turd.
Speaker 5 (37:00):
It was mortifying.
Speaker 1 (37:02):
Probably should have just dripped down his face, like literally.
Speaker 4 (37:11):
Yeah, just a big old grin happy to be in
the car and just can't stick their head out that window.
Speaker 5 (37:18):
Got us to like get up over my shoulder and
the driver window and stick.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
I was so happy to see you. I had to
see you all day.
Speaker 3 (37:25):
It was like, Mom, you're never gonna believe.
Speaker 1 (37:27):
Look what I had. Daddy gave me a treat.
Speaker 5 (37:30):
Yeah, and I'm just all the way to Honor, which
is a little bit of a drive from there. I
didn't know what to do.
Speaker 1 (37:41):
My ground zero is about halfway from where you started
your trip to Honor.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
M hm, yeah, well I appreciate you guys coming on
the podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:51):
Area dirty laundry and wrapped the ship up, and I
apologize to whatever young guy who got had to take
the trash out at Rick's Grocery that doesn't exist anymore,
that horrible night spring of two thousand and nine, and
somebody's like tuning in ago. I thought I was gonna
hear some recovery talk, like what is this? That's the
(38:13):
thing about, you know, that's how we we wrap it
back up here is you know part of recovery is
accepting the things that you can't change.
Speaker 2 (38:22):
You know where you're at now, yep, you know, and
can't change the past, and that's the shit did happen.
And you can laugh at it too, And that's the
whole recovery part of it is you're in a good
spot now and you can tell stories like this and
they're funny and you're not drunk. You don't have to
be high like. It's pretty cool yep. And we can
(38:42):
laugh that sh and have fun in recovery. That's that's
the moral of the story here. But we do have
to wrap it up, okay, but maybe we'll have the
Bumper Buddies on it again. We'll have you, actually, the
bumper buddies.
Speaker 1 (39:00):
You all have to have him weigh in.
Speaker 2 (39:01):
Yes, absolutely, to be continued, Yes, don't worry, We'll I'll
let you know when's happening.
Speaker 1 (39:09):
But yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:10):
Thanks for listening and listen to more episodes on our
app and at two seventeen recovery dot com.
Speaker 1 (39:14):
Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery podcast. Listen
to over nine hundred episodes on the two seventeen Recovery
app that's free in your app store or online at
two seventeen recovery dot com.
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