November 11, 2024 • 46 mins
In this episode of the 30 Screams or Less podcast, we review 'The Substance'. Written and directed by Coralie Fargeat and starring Demi Moore (Elisabeth Sparkles), Margaret Qualley (Sue), and Dennis Quaid (Harvey). The plot of this movie is a fading celebrity takes a black-market drug: a cell-replicating substance that temporarily creates a younger, better version of herself.
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(00:00):
How you doing? I'm Phil Falcone, director, producer, effects, actor, whatever you want to do, whatever you want to call me, I'm good for it, I'm good.
(00:07):
Producer of Terrifier, Terrifier 2 and Terrifier 3, special effects on Terrifier and Terrifier 2, and whatever else I have to do, set build.
I'm on 30 Screams or Less. Welcome people, glad to be here.
Warning. 30 Screams or Less may contain spoilers about movies that have recently been released.
If you haven't seen the movie, go watch it, come back and enjoy the show.
(00:31):
Or if you don't want to waste your time watching the movie and rather have two random horror dudes watch it for you, we got you covered as well.
(00:57):
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams or Less, a horror movie podcast where we review horror movies in 30 minutes or less.
Today's movie we're going to be reviewing is called The Substance.
It's written and directed by Corlifer Geet, starring Demi Moore as Elizabeth, Margaret Qualley as Sue, and you fucker.
Again, always putting Ari Lehman in the notes as I'm talking.
(01:19):
This is the new thing. We got to talk about Ari Lehman at least once every week, apparently.
I guess so. And also Dennis Quaid is Harvey in this.
Geez. Nice segue there. Yep, thanks. Thank you.
The plot of this movie is a fating celebrity takes a black market drug, a cell replicating substance that temporarily creates a younger, better version of herself.
(01:44):
But before we get into it, Corey, last night I was looking in the mirror and you know what?
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And dude, my beard looked amazing. I'm glad you turned me on to Beard Octane.
(02:05):
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And whether you're pounding IPAs or chopping wood, you got to look your best.
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They're local too. They're based out of Connecticut. So help them out and support small businesses.
(02:27):
We're not just slinging beard grooming supplies. We've been using them for a while.
Yeah, we have. 30 Screams or Less starts now. Corey, what did you think of the substance?
So, Steve, this is one of my favorite films of 2024 by far, maybe even my favorite.
Demi Moore was incredible. Margaret Qualley is making a name for herself.
I'm not going to lie. I didn't know what other movies she had been in until I looked at her IMDB.
(02:50):
And I was like, damn, I watched that. Yeah, I had heard a lot of positive things about this movie before I even watched it.
All of them were validated after my single viewing of this.
I feel like there's definitely some kind of a hidden message in this.
And I can't wait to try and figure it out with you. Oh, yeah, there definitely is a hidden message for sure.
And I was kind of toying with it as I was making my notes last night.
(03:11):
But I want to say this. This movie, I feel like just flew under the radar, similar to that of the menu.
So not a lot of hype went behind this movie.
Like I didn't see many commercials, nothing really big on social media.
I saw an interview that Margaret Qualley did on I think it was like Jimmy Fallon or something like that.
(03:32):
So she did an interview talking about the movie and how her mother wasn't the biggest fan of seeing her naked all the time in it.
And there was a lot of nudity. Let me tell you. Yeah, tons.
I was shocked that Demi was in the nude as much as she was. I know, right?
Yeah, that's something you wouldn't expect from someone her age.
(03:54):
Because she's still great looking. Don't get me wrong.
But, you know, when you're like 61, you might want to be like you want to be a little tighter when you're doing these kind of roles.
It's not something that any 60 year old can do. But I think she pulled it off. Oh, yeah, she looked great.
She did great. And I feel like she hasn't done anything for a while either.
But the only thing I really remember is Mr. Brooks. I don't know if you've seen that with Dane Cook and Kevin Costner.
(04:19):
No, I didn't hate the premise, but it was fine. But that's the last thing I've seen her in.
I don't think I've really seen her in like anything else other than that.
Well, maybe she was in that. So she was in that Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent, that Nicholas Gage movie in 2022.
Oh, yeah, that's right. But then it looks like she took two years off.
(04:40):
Yeah. Well, I mean, good for her. Yeah, good for her.
She's dealing with I know they're not married anymore, but Bruce is, you know, Bruce is very sick right now.
And I believe she's been involved in like his care a lot. So maybe she's just been dealing with that.
Yeah, exactly. You know, trying to be there for him. Yeah, because yeah, I mean, obviously, they're exes, but it's still her ex husband.
And she probably still has not feelings for him, but, you know, still care about him.
(05:04):
That shit doesn't just go away, especially when you're together as long as they have been.
So, yeah, maybe she's spending time with him, like whatever she has.
So, yeah, she still looks great in this. I didn't think I was going to see her naked at all.
Last thing I saw of her doing anything like that was striptease, which that's whatever.
You know, the whole selling point of that was her being topless because it's not good.
(05:28):
It's not a good movie. I've never watched it. Don't worry about it.
That's OK. I get my notes from you. Yeah, that's true.
Well, I took all the notes this week. Yep, because I watched this a few weeks ago.
So, yeah, well, it made sense because it's still fresh to me and you just watch it.
And like, usually you're pretty good about that.
Like if you have a movie in mind, you put the notes down.
(05:48):
But maybe you're just fucking hanging out, vibing and like, not going to take notes.
Well, I'm not going to lie to you.
I didn't think at first that this would be something that we would review on this.
But then it got really fucky towards the end. Yeah.
So, yeah, it fit the category and yeah, we saved it because our past three weeks, three, four weeks have been packed on this show.
So, oh, absolutely. So, yeah, I want to go back to this real quick.
(06:11):
Yeah, this movie fell really under the radar.
But it also kind of reminded me of the menu in that sense is that it fell under the radar, but it was so fucking good.
And I think people were talking about it.
Here's where the menu excelled over the substance.
The menu had the opportunity of going on Max.
So what the fuck is Mubi?
(06:33):
This is like the first time I've ever heard of this service.
Did Tubi change their name?
No, someone probably said, oh, it's going to be on Tubi.
Yeah. And like, I don't know, it was maybe a typo in the contract or some shit.
Mubi. I don't know, man.
I looked at it, their lineup, they've got two good movies on there.
And then everything else looks like it's something straight off of like, I don't know, like the library.
(06:55):
You can watch, rent these for free.
Yeah, it's very weird.
Like, I feel like I should have a library card just to access this streaming service.
And it's $15 a month.
What are they Netflix?
I guess.
Netflix is like pretty close to that now.
So are there, I mean, they're way more than that, but like same realm.
What are they 20 bucks a month?
Yeah, I pay around 20 a month, something like that.
(07:17):
Here's where I think menu excels over the substance.
And that is the menu got released on Max, which is much, much, much larger audience.
Just a lot of people have Max at this point.
It's my personal favorite streaming service, to be honest.
I think the movies on there are just fantastic.
As soon as it hit streaming for Max blew up.
(07:39):
Everyone is social media fucking talking about it.
Yeah, but it also did pretty well in theaters, didn't it?
It did OK.
It technically bombed in theaters.
So it went to Max.
That's when it blew up.
That's when everyone started talking about it.
The substance could potentially have the same effect, really.
But who the fuck knows what Moby is, Moby?
Moby.
Yeah, Moby.
(08:01):
Moby has his own streaming service.
Yeah, he does.
He's like Jay-Z has his own music streaming service.
Good for him.
God, I would have heard a very Moby thing.
It's such a Moby thing.
My name is Moby and I'm going to make a streaming service called Moby.
Just a little typo on the contract there again.
It's almost how about like that burger joint that they made in JN Silent Bob, the universe.
(08:22):
Oh, my God.
What is it?
What is it?
Mubies?
Mubies.
Yeah, that's right.
So maybe someone just created Moby off of fucking Mubies.
Stupid.
You are the ball lickers.
I love JN Silent Bob, man, especially Strike Back.
(08:43):
Fantastic.
So many people on TikTok, I saw that clip.
You know how they're sitting outside the convenience store,
the mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, fuck, fuck song they sing?
Yeah.
Recreated that for Halloween this year.
That's fucking great.
I see it constantly on my fucking TikTok.
Really?
Yeah.
A lot of people getting down on that, huh?
People, all the kids are finding out what it is now, apparently.
(09:06):
OK.
Even though it came out like 20 years ago.
I'm surprised they're not canceling it.
Who'd they try canceling recently?
Korn.
They tried canceling Korn recently.
Well, shit, we just turned into a Korn podcast again.
Exactly.
I'm just bringing it all full circle.
We just let's throw in Korn, Ari Lehman.
James McAvoy.
Let's just get it all done in one shot so we can talk about the substance.
(09:27):
Oh, yeah.
We're talking about a movie.
That's right.
We are talking about, well, we're talking about a movie.
Like, we're going off here.
We should be talking about this movie because it's fucking great.
So the whole idea of this movie is that you have this aging actress.
Her name is Elizabeth Sparkle.
And I love the way the movie starts off, actually.
(09:48):
And yeah, I was a big fan of that, too.
The star?
Yeah.
And you know what?
And it ends that way, too, with a star.
Wasn't the star destroyed at the end?
It was starting to get destroyed in the beginning, too.
But yeah, towards the end, it was destroyed as well.
It just kind of cracked and stuff.
But it opens and closes with that star.
And that's really cool because it all kind of comes full circle in the movie.
And I think they utilized that star as a way to show the passing years for this movie
(10:13):
because obviously, they show them making it.
It's all pristine.
Elizabeth Sparkle's on it.
She's doing her red, not red carpet thing,
but the paparazzi thing.
They're all taking photos.
And she looks younger.
Everything's kind of top-down shot.
So you can't really see what she looks like when she's younger.
And obviously, that's to be expected because what are they going to do?
(10:34):
Like de-age?
Demi Moore?
I doubt it.
Don't need to.
Don't need to.
Really don't need to.
Just have that top view.
And it looks, but it was great.
I love that opening.
And it started, you just started noticing the cracking
and kind of the different people walking down the street.
And that shows the aging process.
(10:55):
And I knew we were going to be in for some fucking weird-ass movie, man.
As soon as I saw an intro like that, and then I saw Harvey, his face,
always kind of like in your face, almost like you're taking LSD
and you're trying to talk to people.
Dennis Quaid is so fucking loud.
It took me a second to realize who it was
(11:16):
because I feel like I haven't seen him in anything in a while.
Another one who's kind of disappeared.
Yeah, he kind of fades in and out.
You'll see him in a pretty solid movie and then he'll be gone for a while.
And you just won't really see him in anything.
But he gets that movie money and then disappears for a little bit.
Good for him.
If I could be a movie star and have that kind of life, fuck yeah.
(11:37):
Just make one movie, go away, come back every once in a while.
It's like a blow your paycheque on drugs, come back.
Yeah.
It's like the best part-time job ever.
Get paid big money, shoot for like two months, if that.
And then fuck off.
But I was actually seeing on social media that there was a lot of symbolism in this movie,
(11:57):
similar to that of like The Shining and Psycho.
And there's like a few others that I can't really remember off the top of my head.
But as I'm thinking about it, like this movie is still fresh in my mind.
I'm like, holy shit, you're right.
Especially with the long room.
The long room looks like the room where the two girls were standing, the twins were standing.
(12:20):
Oh, The Shining?
Yeah, and The Shining.
If you look at that room and you compare it to that Halloween, The Shining, very similar.
So it looks like they're paying homage to these movies, these horror movies.
But as you were saying earlier, I didn't know if this was going to be a horror movie or not.
Because like the first, I don't know, maybe a half hour of this movie,
(12:42):
because it's a long movie. Two and a half hours.
Two and a half?
Yeah.
Okay. So honestly, I didn't notice it while I was watching it because I was glued to it the whole time.
So I did the thing where I had to stop and see how much time was left because,
and it's not this time, it wasn't me thinking that this is a bad movie by any means.
It was more like, I don't know where this is going.
(13:05):
And how long is this fucking movie to figure out like, where are we going to go from here?
And I can already see some shit going down where Sue was starting to take more fluid from Elizabeth.
But we'll get into that.
So I'm just doing my usual here and I'm flipping through the IMDB page.
Yep.
A little bit of trivia here. Ray Liotta was originally cast in the film to play the guy that Dennis Quaid played.
(13:30):
Harvey.
Harvey. So Ray Liotta was originally cast to play him.
No shit.
Yep. But he died before they started filming it. So Dennis Quaid was recast as that character.
I don't know if you could pull it off, to be honest. I mean, Ray Liotta, don't get me wrong,
fantastic after and usually kind of pigeon-held into a certain type of role.
Most of the time tends to be mafia based.
(13:52):
Yeah. Yeah. Good fellas.
Right. Which to be expected mafia, tough guy type gang mentality roles.
Whereas I find that Dennis Quaid has like a broader career in movies.
Like he's always playing some sort of different character.
So I feel like he had that in him to be this obnoxious Harvey character who was just always in your face.
(14:16):
And dude, there's this one scene that people with misophonia would lose their fucking mind over.
I didn't even know what that definition was until I just read your notes.
But are we talking about the part when he's eating shrimp?
Yep.
Oh, even I was like, it doesn't bother me when people chew.
(14:36):
To be honest, I'm kind of a loud eater myself and it sucks.
Even though I chew with my mouth closed and he was obnoxious eating these shrimps, man.
Because you saw those like hand going in his mouth and it's just slobbering everywhere.
And yeah, the camera was zooming in.
Yeah, they were always zoomed in on Harvey and I don't know why they were always zoomed in on him.
(14:59):
So initially I was actually thinking that Harvey may have been behind the whole substance.
Yeah, me too.
We never find out who it was, but that's black market.
You don't know who you're buying from.
I don't even think she paid anyone for these drugs.
Unless she did like a cash app or a Venmo transaction, PayPal, whatever.
She's just literally going to this mailbox every so often to get her shit.
(15:23):
Yeah, and it's like a dark alleyway.
Yeah, it's so fucking weird.
She goes in this dark alleyway and it's like she opens up the shutter door with a key card
and you go in and the room is completely fucking white like it's men in black.
She goes in there and she just picks up her weekly refills and it's fucking wild, man.
So here's how this all happened.
(15:44):
So she's trying to remember.
Okay, I think she was all upset leaving.
Oh, yes, she was all upset leaving the studio because she went to the men's bathroom
because the women's bathroom was out of order and she heard Harvey talking shit.
And of course, I knew this was going to be a weird ass movie, especially when we are like
(16:05):
right in Harvey's face as he's taking a piss.
And I'm just like, this is so in your face fucking like if you were doing drugs,
this would really fuck with you.
So she leaves this place and she gets in this car accident, perfectly fine, nothing wrong.
So she gets there, doctor's like, you're free to go, nothing wrong here.
But there's this other doctor or like a nurse really, I think more of a nurse.
(16:29):
And this nurse, really young looking, he's like, let me just do one more test on you.
And he's feeling her spine and he's like, you would make a perfect candidate.
I mean, you're perfect, like kind of catching himself.
So do you think this guy worked for the company that made the substance or he's just someone that uses it?
I think just someone that uses it.
Okay.
Because we do find out like, well, we find out later that we see the older version of him
(16:55):
because this is what it is.
So this is the replicant version of an older man who I'm thinking wanted to be a nurse again,
but just younger looking and all that.
So she's leaving and he hands her a USB stick.
So she goes home, she puts the USB stick in her TV, could have viruses, malware, we don't know.
(17:15):
But instead it's just like this ridiculous commercial for the substance.
Very vague, but telling to give a call, all that, if you're looking for, you know, the better your life or to rejuvenate, whatever.
So she throws it away, but then she sees this article about how she's going to be replaced.
Like we're trying to find the new Elizabeth Sparkle because what she is, she's one of those like fitness gurus.
(17:40):
Kind of like, what's his name?
I think you're going to get it before I am.
Oh, Richard Simmons.
Thank you.
Kind of like the Richard Simmons, but it had like the 80s look with the fucking leg warmers and skin tight spandex, all that stuff.
It has all that.
So that kind of confused me a little bit trying to figure what time period this was set in.
Yeah.
(18:00):
This has got to be like early 90s maybe.
Right.
Mid 90s, right?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I'm thinking this is like mid 90s has to be because if you look at the clothing, everything, like the styles, it's still like that time period.
So yeah, I'm thinking this is like the early 90s, something like that, based on how everyone kind of looks.
So she finds this out and she ends up going out drinking.
(18:24):
She comes home.
She grabs that thing from the fucking garbage, the USB drive, calls it and she's like, oh, I'm going to go get this.
She grabs that thing from the USB drive, calls the number and says she's interested.
And this is when she starts getting a package in the mail and it has like all this stuff.
It has like the food for the week and the injection fluid, all this stuff to get started.
(18:45):
Yeah.
So like when she originally watches the ad for this shit and it's explaining how it all works, the fact that you have to essentially feed your dead body, because the way that it works is you can inject yourself and then it's seven days.
So you have to switch into this and your other body essentially.
But while this is happening, you have to feed your dead body and this kit includes the food.
(19:07):
It's basically mush inside of a bag.
Exactly.
But look ahead.
No, no, I was going to say, so she sees all this in that video and she was just, she must have been in a really bad place to just think this sounded like a great idea and to go along with it.
I really want to know what she paid for it.
Yeah, I'd like to know too, because clearly this is not something cheap.
(19:28):
Or she has that kind of she has that fuck money where she could just buy all sorts of shit or they maybe just did it for free because they don't or they wanted to get it out there to select audiences.
They don't want to make it like a widespread thing though, because then everyone would have a fucking replicant.
She's got that Virgil money.
Yeah, exactly.
That Virgil money.
(19:48):
So she.
RIP.
Yeah, RIP.
So she decides to inject herself with this stuff and she's standing there naked.
61 year old Demi Moore standing there naked.
I'm like, I didn't think I was going to see this today or this year.
So yeah, she injects herself and she's like, I feel fine.
And then that's when you see the fucking whole crazy transformation happening.
(20:11):
Dude, this scene was so perfectly well done.
The, well, the practical effects of her fucking back splitting open.
Yep.
It was gross.
I'm not going to lie.
I actually cringed a little bit when this was happening because her back splits open and then you see another body for Sue.
Yeah, we don't know her yet, but we see Sue crawling out of her fucking body.
(20:32):
So fucking wild, man, that she just completely like replicated herself and just slides out of her own back and like that whole new form.
It's so crazy.
I know when I'm trying to like I was talking to people about this movie trying to describe to them what the substance was.
And I'm like, yeah, essentially you inject yourself with this stuff and then a clone of yourself rips out of your back.
(20:53):
Yeah, that's exactly it.
It just, you start, and they're like, excuse me, what?
That's like the way to explain it, man.
So now you have Sue and she comes into play.
She's just standing there naked the whole time, just like looking at herself because clearly like you're just now a younger version of yourself, a complete replicant.
(21:14):
And so the thing with this is that it's the same person.
This is important to remember.
It's the same person, just different bodies, different times.
So either way, it's still Elizabeth Sparkle.
One is just Sue, which is the young version.
The older version is Elizabeth Sparkle.
So Sue decides she's going to go and audition to be the new Elizabeth Sparkle.
(21:38):
Naturally gets it because this girl is fucking flawless looking.
Absolutely flawless.
So this is kind of hilarious, too, because I don't want to try this with my boss, but I'm going to or, you know, if I ever get another job, I'm going to be like, hey, yeah, I'm only coming in every other week.
Yeah, I know, right.
In my initial interview.
Yeah, because that's what she did.
And the guy was like, yeah, you're so perfect.
(22:00):
That's fine.
That's exactly it.
Harvey was all about it.
And he's just like, whatever it takes, we want you in this.
I'm only coming to work every other week.
Like, what the fuck?
It's like, OK, yeah, can I have that kind of job?
Shit.
Good for her, though.
Good for her to be able to just do that.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was pretty wild.
So yeah, she gets this job.
(22:20):
Harvey is all excited.
And what happens is every other week, Sue's gone, then it's Elizabeth Sparkle.
Elizabeth Sparkle, by the way, gets fired from her job because they got Sue.
And naturally, Elizabeth Sparkle wasn't exactly happy about it.
But at least Sue has a job now.
And, you know, she's the new shiny thing.
They're all excited about her, and numbers are great, all this shit.
(22:45):
But the idea is she has to stabilize so she can stay in the body for seven days.
Like, she almost has to, like, feed off of the host version, which is Elizabeth Sparkle.
So Sue has to, like, pull fluid from Elizabeth's back.
And she would inject that into her daily.
(23:05):
And that's how they would be stable for a week, and then repeat the process.
She goes down, Elizabeth back up.
So it's like one week off, one week on.
Sounds like she's in the army.
That's basically the schedule.
So Sue started blowing up.
She's like all over fucking the news and everything.
Billboards.
She's got a giant billboard of herself right outside of the apartment they live in.
(23:28):
I know, man.
Right outside, just staring right at Elizabeth the whole time.
And this is not sitting well with Elizabeth.
Elizabeth is starting to want to spend more and more time in the body of Sue.
So she's like, oh, you know what?
I'll just pull a little more fluid.
We'll have one more day.
And she's like pulling this fluid and put, like, reusing these fucking containers.
(23:50):
And she's just injecting herself with it.
But when she's doing that, she's upsetting the balance.
So now that she's upsetting the balance, her normal body, the host body, is getting real fucked up.
So that was a question I had when she initially watched that ad for this stuff.
Did they say what was going to happen if they didn't switch back in the seven day time frame?
(24:11):
Uh, no, they didn't.
OK, so she's just essentially making herself rot away and she knows it.
Yeah, exactly.
So she's just making herself rot away and it starts to get worse and worse.
And dude, it gets really fucking bad.
But before I get to that fucking craziness, she starts, like, kind of spiraling.
So Elizabeth is really starting to lose herself, thinking that, like, Sue is a completely different entity than her.
(24:38):
But they are one in the same.
Think of it as, like, alter ego stuff, like almost split personality.
So Sue is her split personality.
It's like the girl that she wants to be.
She wants to relive her glory years in the body of this girl.
But she's basically lost her fucking mind and she's just going on these food binges and just doing all sorts of shit.
(24:58):
So leaving the mess for Sue to clean up after the fucking awful vacation that Elizabeth takes.
It's almost like Elizabeth punishes herself thinking that it's going to hurt Sue, but to the same fucking person.
She's only hurting herself.
It's pretty wild to think of because you're not.
I don't think you're thinking of like me personally.
I wasn't thinking of that while I was watching it.
I'm just thinking Sue and Elizabeth are two completely different people.
(25:21):
Right, but they're not.
But they're not.
It's a younger copy of Elizabeth.
So Elizabeth is basically punishing herself the whole time for doing this thing.
Like that's the way I'm seeing it.
She's just punishing herself because she doesn't like her body how it is now because she's 61 or in her 60s.
So obviously when it comes to Hollywood, it's all about biggest and brightest, new starlets.
(25:44):
It's all about the bright and shiny new thing.
And Elizabeth Sparkle is not the bright and shiny new thing.
Sue is though.
So Elizabeth is spiraling and she's thinking that Sue is in control and is taking over.
So dude, Sue starts fucking like emptying Elizabeth with that fucking fluid.
That's the only way I could think of it.
(26:05):
She fucking drains her dry.
Just drains her dry.
Oh my God.
We forgot to...
I wanted to talk about this.
So how the fuck did Sue build that entire room by hand in the back of the apartment?
I know that's pretty impressive.
Like literally a secret room.
Yeah, just built a secret room in the bathroom.
Just stored the body in there because you can't just have a naked body laying on the floor all the time.
(26:28):
You have to put it somewhere.
It's going to raise concerns for people coming over.
And Sue starts having younger guys coming over and they're doing things.
And yeah, it gets to a point where she's drained her so much that she's like aged.
She's really aged.
Like half her face is just old.
And we're starting to get into the territory where I'm affected by the sounds.
(26:51):
And like...
Another really good sound design.
Yeah.
You know, they did great with the sound design in this movie.
Absolutely.
The sound design was amazing.
The fucking knee.
That's what I'm talking about.
Her trying to get up from the chair,
but because she's been fucking drained like crazy by Sue,
her knee like in old state.
(27:13):
It's just super fucking old.
It aged by just pulling that fluid out of her.
So balance is all fucked up.
Elizabeth is much older looking now, very disheveled, going gray, all this stuff.
And the transformation was insane to see though.
It was really...
No, no, I was going to say it's like what you'd think would happen as you age,
(27:35):
but all of this is literally happening within a week.
Yeah, I know.
Like a week, two weeks, it's rapid.
The aging process is rapid.
And like the way she's pulling this fluid is from her back.
And like there's this little hole in her back.
So Sue gets fed up with Elizabeth's shit
because Elizabeth is just raising hell now.
(27:56):
She's like making the house a ginormous mess.
And she's like, fuck this.
She starts taking all this fluid and she's like putting it in like fucking mason jars and shit.
Just emptying her.
So she starts doing that.
And Sue, she's about to host the New Year's Eve Ball or whatever show.
It's like the biggest show of the year.
(28:17):
Millions of people are watching.
So she's about to host it.
And then she finds out like she sees her nose bleeding.
She has to re-up.
She has to get more of that fucking fluid injected in her so she can maintain.
Turns out she started pulling the fluid from her back and it's black.
It's clearly infected, whatever.
She calls this company up.
(28:37):
They're like she needs to take over so that way she can produce more fluid.
So that way it can be used on Sue.
So she decides to go under, see if she can make it happen for like a night.
And dude, she is fucking gross looking.
She looks like she aged to 150.
Yeah, and it got worse that she turned into like a monster.
(29:00):
Oh, it got so much worse.
So yeah, she turns like in this really old fucking person.
She's calling this company asking to terminate.
She does not want anything to do with this whole process anymore.
So she goes out in public and she's looking like one of those old ladies to hop on the fucking bus.
(29:22):
Minus the walker?
Yeah, she's got the like doesn't have a walker, but she's got like the hood on and like the scar and all this stuff.
And she picks up the termination fluid and drags Sue like a fucking maniac to the living room,
injects her with this termination fluid.
So I'm thinking, okay, it's done.
Sue's dead.
Like the process can't be reverted.
(29:44):
So she's going to forever live out her old self, which that's on her.
That could have ended there technically because that's like teaching yourself a lesson.
But I don't think it would have been like the best ending.
What we ended up getting was the best ending.
So she injects Sue with this termination fluid.
Sue's awake.
Elizabeth's awake.
(30:04):
They're both awake at the same time.
Now they're both self-fucking aware.
Sky net.
Yeah, sky net shit.
So they're both self-aware.
They're both like now two different entities.
So it's almost like she just split herself both ways, mind and body.
So Sue goes nuts, just beating the shit out of Elizabeth, pounds her into oblivion.
And you see this shift happen.
(30:27):
And it's like as soon as Elizabeth was dead, Sue inherited like everything, all the synapses
of the brain, all that shit.
So it's almost like Elizabeth's dead.
Now it's Sue going forward.
So she gets up, gets dressed, goes to the fucking studio.
And now we're starting to get into one of my other bugaboos.
(30:47):
Bugaboos, huh?
Yup.
Fucking tea stuff.
Oh my God, man.
Tell us about it, Steve.
Yeah.
So Sue starts coughing up a storm as she's done getting her makeup.
She goes to the bathroom, spitting teeth.
Teeth are just falling out of her head.
I love watching these movies with any of these things that I know make you tick because I
(31:10):
know you're cringing.
Oh yeah.
I'm big time cringing.
Whenever you're suffering, I'm happy.
Yeah, absolutely.
Geez, you bastard.
I just got fired.
Yeah, you're fired.
It's going to be James McAvoy from now on.
Yeah, I'm going to get James McAvoy from now.
I'm going to hit him up later.
All right, guys, this is my last episode.
(31:33):
I guess so.
My secret is out.
So, yep, your secret's out.
Sorry, Corey, you've been fired.
Replace.
Fuck yeah, finally.
See ya.
So yeah, she's spitting teeth at this point.
And now she's like, I got to go back home and fucking somehow re-up.
Or I guess there's still a little bit more of the fluid to get started.
So now she's trying to make a copy of a copy of a better version of herself.
(31:57):
Oh, you know what?
I want to go back to this real quick.
Is that I find it funny because this whole movie has to do with replication of a person.
Right?
Yeah.
So her mother, Annie McDowell, was in a movie called Multiplicity with Michael Keaton.
Have you seen my baseball?
Yeah, have you seen my baseball?
(32:18):
So yeah, she was in a replicant movie as well.
I actually didn't know that.
I didn't even think that was her daughter, to be honest.
But apparently it is.
So it's really cool seeing this whole new wave of actors coming into Hollywood, which
are second generation shit.
So like Randy Quaid, he's another one that's fucking in Hollywood.
So you have Dennis Quaid, Randy Quaid.
(32:40):
Randy's absolutely insane.
Yeah, he's nuts.
He's bonkers.
I actually regret not meeting him at Rhode Island Comic-Con last year.
You should have.
Yeah, but he was charging more than like fucking Seth Green was in like the Sons of Anarchy
cast.
I think it was like $250 for like a signature.
It was something insane.
That's nuts.
And I was just like, dude, you don't have a fucking line for a reason.
(33:02):
Like you've done maybe one or two movies.
Like people know you from the Vacation series.
That's it.
Exactly.
Yeah.
So those fucking Quaids.
Yeah, geez, too much.
So she decides to inject herself with like the fluid that they would use initially to
get the replicant.
And the crazy thing about this is that on the first iteration of the replicant, you
(33:24):
see the eyes splitting in half, which is fucking sick.
Mm hmm.
Yeah, it looked amazing.
Yeah, I thought that was so cool looking.
But now we see like 10 eyes happening.
And I'm like, oh, shit's about to get real fucked up.
And dude, what comes from it is something straight out of fucking The Last of Us.
Mm hmm.
(33:45):
Yep.
It's a monster with teeth in the chest and just a slanted head.
Elizabeth Sparkle's face is sticking out the back.
It's fucking.
It does look like it was infected with cordyceps.
Yeah.
It's fucking wild, man.
So she rips off Elizabeth Sparkle's face from a painting.
(34:06):
Not a painting, like just an oversized photo in the living room, glues it to her face,
tries to put on the blue dress.
It's all fucked up.
And she rolls up to the studio.
She opens the door.
She's got this face taped to her wearing the blue dress.
And the guy's like, we've been waiting for you.
Come on.
And you see this scene where everyone's clapping.
(34:28):
They're excited to see her.
And I'm thinking to myself the whole time, is this like literally in her head because.
Yep.
I thought she was hallucinating as well.
Yeah, which actually I think she was as soon as she got to like the hallway.
So you would think if this was real, they'd notice some shit's happening because she's
looking massive, like a fucking monster.
She's just walking around like that type deal, almost something like out of Toxic Avenger
(34:52):
or something.
Yeah.
So crazy shit.
So she goes out on stage, her mask falls off and everyone is freaking the fuck out.
So they're attacking her and all this shit and her hand falls off.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
She's just slowly decomposing in front of everyone.
(35:13):
Yep.
Oh, you know what?
I wanted to talk about this one thing too, because I thought this was funny.
So obviously remember she lost her teeth in the bathroom, but then she was going in the
elevator and her ear fell off.
So she was straight up trying to be Mick Foley.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So she's on stage and they're attacking her, her hand falls off and blood everywhere, spraying
(35:37):
the whole audience.
It is everyone is fucking covered head to toe in blood.
So that's so you're mentioning that here.
Apparently there is a special thanks in the credit to all the extras in that theater scene
who got covered in blood.
I would hope so.
Because yeah, there was a lot of people in that.
(35:58):
I just picture a, you know, a talk show audience.
There's a lot of people there.
Yeah.
So it's like a fucking gore concert.
Exactly.
It was like a gore concert.
So I'm thinking too, like the last time I seen something that bloody, maybe Blade.
Remember what the blood shower scene where everyone is fucking covered in blood.
Yeah.
Like that.
Everyone's just covered head to toe in fucking blood.
(36:19):
So she manages to escape and her leg falls off as she's trying to get away and she falls
and explodes everywhere.
Oh man.
We sound like we're making this shit up.
We are not.
No, no, this is all happened.
This is all actually happened.
This is factual.
This is the fucking movie.
(36:39):
It's real life.
It's real life.
So the body fucking explodes on the ground and what's left over is the part of the back,
which had Elizabeth Sparkle's face and she's like the around it was like a hunk of meat.
So she's fucking crawling around like the fucking blob and she crawls to the star on
the walk of fame on top of her star and you have confetti falling down and all this stuff
(37:04):
and her face eventually disappears and it's just the star and that's how it ends.
Yeah.
The ending was perfect.
The ending was amazing.
Another non happy ending.
Yep.
Another non happy ending.
It was fucking great.
So yeah, I love this.
Corey, what do you give the substance?
I think it's pretty obvious that it's going to get a five out of five for me.
(37:25):
I think it was absolutely perfect.
Again, one of my favorite movies of the year.
I'll probably watch this several times and I feel like it's one of those movies you can
watch and you're going to pick something new up every time because there are absolutely
messages in this movie.
Coralie Farge did amazing.
Absolutely incredible.
Can't wait to see more from her.
Performances by Demi and Margaret were next level amazing.
(37:46):
The score was amazing.
Cinematography, practical effects.
I might actually pick this one up on vinyl because I know Waxworks put it out, but yeah,
not enough good things to say about this movie.
Like I just gushing about it, you know?
Yeah, we've been gushing about it this whole time.
We fucking love this movie.
I can't wait to get that score.
This score was fantastic.
(38:06):
It was just...
Yeah, it's...
While you're talking, I'm going to look.
I think it's Waxworks that did it.
If Waxworks has it, I'm all about it.
I'm going to get that shit because I love every part of this fucking sound.
It's very...
I don't want to say new wave.
It's almost like when you're standing outside of a club and you hear the club beats, but
it's almost muted in a way.
(38:28):
Just like that type, you know that type sound?
And it's like that...
Oh yeah.
Like most of the fucking movie.
It is Waxworks, by the way.
I just sent you a link.
All right, cool.
I'm going to have to check that out.
So all right, I'm going to go into my review on this as well.
I'm going with a five.
Zero out of five.
Zero out of five hated it.
Negative five out of five.
Fuck this movie.
Let's talk about corn.
(38:49):
Yeah, let's talk about corn.
Yeah, I'm going to go with a five out of five on this one as well.
This movie was absolutely unhinged.
I feel like this movie is in the same vein as the menu where not a lot of marketing went
behind it, so it flew under the radar.
Demi Moore was great in this, and it's been a long time since I've seen her in a movie.
(39:09):
I think, like I was saying, the last one I saw her in was Mr. Brooks.
The score was awesome, and I think the idea behind this movie is it's a social commentary
in that when beauty fades and it's all that people know you for, then you begin to kind
of lose yourself and will do anything to bring you back to your glory years.
(39:31):
So it's almost like you focus so much on the exterior rather than the interior.
So that's the whole idea of Robin Sparkles.
No, Robin Sparkles.
I'm sorry.
Wrong show.
Wrong show.
Let's go to the mall.
Let's go to the mall.
And hey, that's oh my God, what a great blooper.
(39:54):
I'm keeping that in obviously.
The hell yeah.
Because I think I've been wanting to say Robin Sparkles this whole time.
It's funny.
That is too funny.
I completely forgot that that was her name and how I met your mother.
I didn't make the connection with the substance in that.
I should have.
It makes perfect sense.
Yeah, you really should have, but that's okay.
(40:15):
I've been watching it like race you lately.
So I think that's the commentary here is that you need to appreciate yourself and not
focus so much on the superficial, the exterior.
And I think that's the overall idea behind this movie.
And in her case, she was focused so much on the exterior to the point where she would
(40:36):
do anything to get that back and it eventually destroyed her.
So the effects in this were great.
Same thing.
I loved the cinematography.
Whenever Harvey was on screen, it was bold and in your face and clearly him being as
aggravating as humanly possible.
And that's kind of what it's like when someone is really just aggravating.
(40:58):
It's almost like they're just in your face, don't want them there, that kind of deal.
And that's what Harvey was.
When people ask me what's a good body of horror movie, not that any sane person may ask me
that.
I'll say the substance, hands down.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, there's really nothing else that would be at the top of my brain if someone asked
me that question, the mess having seen it now.
(41:18):
Yeah, the only thing I can think of is Tusk.
Yeah, but that was more like a comedy horror movie.
I mean, Kevin Smith made that and I love the movie.
You know, Josh Long was great in it, but I wouldn't put that on the same level as a substance
because it was more of a comedy, I feel.
Yeah, it was more of a comedy.
It was made from a joke.
I saw that in theaters.
(41:39):
Did you?
Good for you.
I don't know.
You know, I wanted to do it because of Kevin Smith, but it wasn't the best movie.
No, it really wasn't.
It was a joke of a movie.
It's body horror all day, like just start to finish.
But there isn't as much of a story behind that as there is with the substance.
(41:59):
The substance has layers to it and if you watch it over and over, you're really going
to see the hidden story behind this whole movie, the hidden concept.
I think that's the beauty of this movie is that it had this whole undertone regarding
vanity.
Not everyone's going to be beautiful for the fucking rest of their lives.
(42:20):
We all get old, we fucking look horrid.
It's going to happen.
In this case, Robin, Jesus Christ, you did it again.
Elizabeth couldn't deal with that.
So she was trying to do everything she could to get those glory days back.
Have you seen Ted?
(42:42):
Have you met Ted?
I need that in my life.
Just go out with some younger folks like I have been and they just go, have you met Steve?
I go, oh shit, now I gotta fucking talk to a 25 year old girl?
This is going to be interesting.
I met him last year, Josh Radner.
Did you?
(43:02):
Yeah, he was at Rhode Island Comcon.
Yeah, how was he?
I think he was drunk, but it was good.
Otherwise, he didn't have much of a line.
He had the blue horn with him.
Yeah, that's to be expected.
I don't know, Ted's okay.
He's fine.
He's not the best on that show.
No, Barney is.
But it all revolves around him.
Barney is hands down the best on that show.
All right, everyone, be sure to like, follow, and subscribe on Facebook, X, Instagram, TikTok,
(43:26):
threads, and YouTube.
Leave us a five star review on all podcast platforms so we can get some more exposure.
Of course, tell your friends.
Both our intro and outro music are courtesy of Andrew Scott Bell.
Be sure to check out Andrew on all major streaming platforms.
And if you see Winnie the Pooh, Blood and Honey on vinyl in the wild, be sure to pick
it up.
We're also part of the Shining Wizards Network.
(43:47):
Be sure to visit ShiningWizardsNetwork.com.
They're an awesome podcast network ranging from wrestling to heavy metal, horror, all
that good stuff.
So check that out.
Visit 30ScreamsOfLess.com for all previous episodes and transcripts to go with those
episodes.
Also, check out BeardOctane.com for their whole line of grooming supplies.
And be sure to use the code 30Screams10 at checkout for 10% off your order.
(44:12):
And if there's anything you want us to review, send an email to 30ScreamsOfLess at gma.com
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Use hashtag 30ScreamsOrLess.
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Click that link and you'll see all sorts of shirts, hats, mugs, things like that.
(44:34):
If you buy it, it helps going towards our hosting costs.
I'm Steve.
I'm Corey.
And thanks for listening to 30 Screams Or Less.
And don't forget to drink your beans.
Welcome everyone.
You just said something right in the middle.
(44:58):
Yeah.
Just cut me right off.
Right at the beginning there.
Ah, shit.
Reset.
Reset.
Redo.
Edit.
Right.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams.
Yeah.
Just cut me off every time.
(45:26):
You want to know something funny?
Yes.
Someone bought something off me from eBay.
Guess what their last name was?
Hatfield.
Lehman.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams Or Less.
No shit.
I'm serious.
I'm serious.
What's his name?
Ari?
(45:47):
It was over 40 bucks.
It wasn't.
No, it wasn't.
It was, I think some girl.
Okay.
His wife, maybe?
You kidding me?
He's not.
No way.
He has a companion.
No, I doubt it.
He's too busy using fake machetes still.
All right.
Good for him.
Good for him.
All right.
Game face.
Ready.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams Or Less.
You all right?
(46:08):
I tried to mute myself.
I started laughing.
I can edit all this stuff out.
That's the funny thing.
Yeah, but why would you?
Jesus Christ.
Okay.
Okay.
Do you exhale?
Okay.
Game face.
We're good.
Why is there such long fucking clock?
(46:37):
Because I'm waiting to see if you're just going to fuck with me there.
I didn't.
You fucked with yourself.
I'm just like, wait for it.
Nope, nothing now.
I just ruined it myself.
No, I'll sneak the fuck ups or the fuck ins later on, whatever they're called.
Fuck ups.
Fuck with Steve's.
Fuck yeah.
How you doing? I'm Phil Falcone, director, producer, effects, actor, whatever you want to do, whatever you want to call me, I'm good for it, I'm good.
(00:07):
Producer of Terrifier, Terrifier 2 and Terrifier 3, special effects on Terrifier and Terrifier 2, and whatever else I have to do, set build.
I'm on 30 Screams or Less. Welcome people, glad to be here.
Warning. 30 Screams or Less may contain spoilers about movies that have recently been released.
If you haven't seen the movie, go watch it, come back and enjoy the show.
(00:31):
Or if you don't want to waste your time watching the movie and rather have two random horror dudes watch it for you, we got you covered as well.
(00:57):
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams or Less, a horror movie podcast where we review horror movies in 30 minutes or less.
Today's movie we're going to be reviewing is called The Substance.
It's written and directed by Corlifer Geet, starring Demi Moore as Elizabeth, Margaret Qualley as Sue, and you fucker.
Again, always putting Ari Lehman in the notes as I'm talking.
(01:19):
This is the new thing. We got to talk about Ari Lehman at least once every week, apparently.
I guess so. And also Dennis Quaid is Harvey in this.
Geez. Nice segue there. Yep, thanks. Thank you.
The plot of this movie is a fating celebrity takes a black market drug, a cell replicating substance that temporarily creates a younger, better version of herself.
(01:44):
But before we get into it, Corey, last night I was looking in the mirror and you know what?
My beard was looking gnarly and I said to myself, I can't look like this.
I got to do something. So I decided to break out Beard Octane's beard wash and conditioner along with their beard oil.
And dude, my beard looked amazing. I'm glad you turned me on to Beard Octane.
(02:05):
Yeah, of course. Like I said, I've been using their products for years and I can vouch for them.
And whether you're pounding IPAs or chopping wood, you got to look your best.
Visit BeardOctane.com and use the code 30SCREAMS10 at checkout for a 10% discount.
It helps us. And like I said, the products are absolutely incredible.
They're local too. They're based out of Connecticut. So help them out and support small businesses.
(02:27):
We're not just slinging beard grooming supplies. We've been using them for a while.
Yeah, we have. 30 Screams or Less starts now. Corey, what did you think of the substance?
So, Steve, this is one of my favorite films of 2024 by far, maybe even my favorite.
Demi Moore was incredible. Margaret Qualley is making a name for herself.
I'm not going to lie. I didn't know what other movies she had been in until I looked at her IMDB.
(02:50):
And I was like, damn, I watched that. Yeah, I had heard a lot of positive things about this movie before I even watched it.
All of them were validated after my single viewing of this.
I feel like there's definitely some kind of a hidden message in this.
And I can't wait to try and figure it out with you. Oh, yeah, there definitely is a hidden message for sure.
And I was kind of toying with it as I was making my notes last night.
(03:11):
But I want to say this. This movie, I feel like just flew under the radar, similar to that of the menu.
So not a lot of hype went behind this movie.
Like I didn't see many commercials, nothing really big on social media.
I saw an interview that Margaret Qualley did on I think it was like Jimmy Fallon or something like that.
(03:32):
So she did an interview talking about the movie and how her mother wasn't the biggest fan of seeing her naked all the time in it.
And there was a lot of nudity. Let me tell you. Yeah, tons.
I was shocked that Demi was in the nude as much as she was. I know, right?
Yeah, that's something you wouldn't expect from someone her age.
(03:54):
Because she's still great looking. Don't get me wrong.
But, you know, when you're like 61, you might want to be like you want to be a little tighter when you're doing these kind of roles.
It's not something that any 60 year old can do. But I think she pulled it off. Oh, yeah, she looked great.
She did great. And I feel like she hasn't done anything for a while either.
But the only thing I really remember is Mr. Brooks. I don't know if you've seen that with Dane Cook and Kevin Costner.
(04:19):
No, I didn't hate the premise, but it was fine. But that's the last thing I've seen her in.
I don't think I've really seen her in like anything else other than that.
Well, maybe she was in that. So she was in that Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent, that Nicholas Gage movie in 2022.
Oh, yeah, that's right. But then it looks like she took two years off.
(04:40):
Yeah. Well, I mean, good for her. Yeah, good for her.
She's dealing with I know they're not married anymore, but Bruce is, you know, Bruce is very sick right now.
And I believe she's been involved in like his care a lot. So maybe she's just been dealing with that.
Yeah, exactly. You know, trying to be there for him. Yeah, because yeah, I mean, obviously, they're exes, but it's still her ex husband.
And she probably still has not feelings for him, but, you know, still care about him.
(05:04):
That shit doesn't just go away, especially when you're together as long as they have been.
So, yeah, maybe she's spending time with him, like whatever she has.
So, yeah, she still looks great in this. I didn't think I was going to see her naked at all.
Last thing I saw of her doing anything like that was striptease, which that's whatever.
You know, the whole selling point of that was her being topless because it's not good.
(05:28):
It's not a good movie. I've never watched it. Don't worry about it.
That's OK. I get my notes from you. Yeah, that's true.
Well, I took all the notes this week. Yep, because I watched this a few weeks ago.
So, yeah, well, it made sense because it's still fresh to me and you just watch it.
And like, usually you're pretty good about that.
Like if you have a movie in mind, you put the notes down.
(05:48):
But maybe you're just fucking hanging out, vibing and like, not going to take notes.
Well, I'm not going to lie to you.
I didn't think at first that this would be something that we would review on this.
But then it got really fucky towards the end. Yeah.
So, yeah, it fit the category and yeah, we saved it because our past three weeks, three, four weeks have been packed on this show.
So, oh, absolutely. So, yeah, I want to go back to this real quick.
(06:11):
Yeah, this movie fell really under the radar.
But it also kind of reminded me of the menu in that sense is that it fell under the radar, but it was so fucking good.
And I think people were talking about it.
Here's where the menu excelled over the substance.
The menu had the opportunity of going on Max.
So what the fuck is Mubi?
(06:33):
This is like the first time I've ever heard of this service.
Did Tubi change their name?
No, someone probably said, oh, it's going to be on Tubi.
Yeah. And like, I don't know, it was maybe a typo in the contract or some shit.
Mubi. I don't know, man.
I looked at it, their lineup, they've got two good movies on there.
And then everything else looks like it's something straight off of like, I don't know, like the library.
(06:55):
You can watch, rent these for free.
Yeah, it's very weird.
Like, I feel like I should have a library card just to access this streaming service.
And it's $15 a month.
What are they Netflix?
I guess.
Netflix is like pretty close to that now.
So are there, I mean, they're way more than that, but like same realm.
What are they 20 bucks a month?
Yeah, I pay around 20 a month, something like that.
(07:17):
Here's where I think menu excels over the substance.
And that is the menu got released on Max, which is much, much, much larger audience.
Just a lot of people have Max at this point.
It's my personal favorite streaming service, to be honest.
I think the movies on there are just fantastic.
As soon as it hit streaming for Max blew up.
(07:39):
Everyone is social media fucking talking about it.
Yeah, but it also did pretty well in theaters, didn't it?
It did OK.
It technically bombed in theaters.
So it went to Max.
That's when it blew up.
That's when everyone started talking about it.
The substance could potentially have the same effect, really.
But who the fuck knows what Moby is, Moby?
Moby.
Yeah, Moby.
(08:01):
Moby has his own streaming service.
Yeah, he does.
He's like Jay-Z has his own music streaming service.
Good for him.
God, I would have heard a very Moby thing.
It's such a Moby thing.
My name is Moby and I'm going to make a streaming service called Moby.
Just a little typo on the contract there again.
It's almost how about like that burger joint that they made in JN Silent Bob, the universe.
(08:22):
Oh, my God.
What is it?
What is it?
Mubies?
Mubies.
Yeah, that's right.
So maybe someone just created Moby off of fucking Mubies.
Stupid.
You are the ball lickers.
I love JN Silent Bob, man, especially Strike Back.
(08:43):
Fantastic.
So many people on TikTok, I saw that clip.
You know how they're sitting outside the convenience store,
the mother, mother, mother, mother, mother, fuck, fuck song they sing?
Yeah.
Recreated that for Halloween this year.
That's fucking great.
I see it constantly on my fucking TikTok.
Really?
Yeah.
A lot of people getting down on that, huh?
People, all the kids are finding out what it is now, apparently.
(09:06):
OK.
Even though it came out like 20 years ago.
I'm surprised they're not canceling it.
Who'd they try canceling recently?
Korn.
They tried canceling Korn recently.
Well, shit, we just turned into a Korn podcast again.
Exactly.
I'm just bringing it all full circle.
We just let's throw in Korn, Ari Lehman.
James McAvoy.
Let's just get it all done in one shot so we can talk about the substance.
(09:27):
Oh, yeah.
We're talking about a movie.
That's right.
We are talking about, well, we're talking about a movie.
Like, we're going off here.
We should be talking about this movie because it's fucking great.
So the whole idea of this movie is that you have this aging actress.
Her name is Elizabeth Sparkle.
And I love the way the movie starts off, actually.
(09:48):
And yeah, I was a big fan of that, too.
The star?
Yeah.
And you know what?
And it ends that way, too, with a star.
Wasn't the star destroyed at the end?
It was starting to get destroyed in the beginning, too.
But yeah, towards the end, it was destroyed as well.
It just kind of cracked and stuff.
But it opens and closes with that star.
And that's really cool because it all kind of comes full circle in the movie.
And I think they utilized that star as a way to show the passing years for this movie
(10:13):
because obviously, they show them making it.
It's all pristine.
Elizabeth Sparkle's on it.
She's doing her red, not red carpet thing,
but the paparazzi thing.
They're all taking photos.
And she looks younger.
Everything's kind of top-down shot.
So you can't really see what she looks like when she's younger.
And obviously, that's to be expected because what are they going to do?
(10:34):
Like de-age?
Demi Moore?
I doubt it.
Don't need to.
Don't need to.
Really don't need to.
Just have that top view.
And it looks, but it was great.
I love that opening.
And it started, you just started noticing the cracking
and kind of the different people walking down the street.
And that shows the aging process.
(10:55):
And I knew we were going to be in for some fucking weird-ass movie, man.
As soon as I saw an intro like that, and then I saw Harvey, his face,
always kind of like in your face, almost like you're taking LSD
and you're trying to talk to people.
Dennis Quaid is so fucking loud.
It took me a second to realize who it was
(11:16):
because I feel like I haven't seen him in anything in a while.
Another one who's kind of disappeared.
Yeah, he kind of fades in and out.
You'll see him in a pretty solid movie and then he'll be gone for a while.
And you just won't really see him in anything.
But he gets that movie money and then disappears for a little bit.
Good for him.
If I could be a movie star and have that kind of life, fuck yeah.
(11:37):
Just make one movie, go away, come back every once in a while.
It's like a blow your paycheque on drugs, come back.
Yeah.
It's like the best part-time job ever.
Get paid big money, shoot for like two months, if that.
And then fuck off.
But I was actually seeing on social media that there was a lot of symbolism in this movie,
(11:57):
similar to that of like The Shining and Psycho.
And there's like a few others that I can't really remember off the top of my head.
But as I'm thinking about it, like this movie is still fresh in my mind.
I'm like, holy shit, you're right.
Especially with the long room.
The long room looks like the room where the two girls were standing, the twins were standing.
(12:20):
Oh, The Shining?
Yeah, and The Shining.
If you look at that room and you compare it to that Halloween, The Shining, very similar.
So it looks like they're paying homage to these movies, these horror movies.
But as you were saying earlier, I didn't know if this was going to be a horror movie or not.
Because like the first, I don't know, maybe a half hour of this movie,
(12:42):
because it's a long movie. Two and a half hours.
Two and a half?
Yeah.
Okay. So honestly, I didn't notice it while I was watching it because I was glued to it the whole time.
So I did the thing where I had to stop and see how much time was left because,
and it's not this time, it wasn't me thinking that this is a bad movie by any means.
It was more like, I don't know where this is going.
(13:05):
And how long is this fucking movie to figure out like, where are we going to go from here?
And I can already see some shit going down where Sue was starting to take more fluid from Elizabeth.
But we'll get into that.
So I'm just doing my usual here and I'm flipping through the IMDB page.
Yep.
A little bit of trivia here. Ray Liotta was originally cast in the film to play the guy that Dennis Quaid played.
(13:30):
Harvey.
Harvey. So Ray Liotta was originally cast to play him.
No shit.
Yep. But he died before they started filming it. So Dennis Quaid was recast as that character.
I don't know if you could pull it off, to be honest. I mean, Ray Liotta, don't get me wrong,
fantastic after and usually kind of pigeon-held into a certain type of role.
Most of the time tends to be mafia based.
(13:52):
Yeah. Yeah. Good fellas.
Right. Which to be expected mafia, tough guy type gang mentality roles.
Whereas I find that Dennis Quaid has like a broader career in movies.
Like he's always playing some sort of different character.
So I feel like he had that in him to be this obnoxious Harvey character who was just always in your face.
(14:16):
And dude, there's this one scene that people with misophonia would lose their fucking mind over.
I didn't even know what that definition was until I just read your notes.
But are we talking about the part when he's eating shrimp?
Yep.
Oh, even I was like, it doesn't bother me when people chew.
(14:36):
To be honest, I'm kind of a loud eater myself and it sucks.
Even though I chew with my mouth closed and he was obnoxious eating these shrimps, man.
Because you saw those like hand going in his mouth and it's just slobbering everywhere.
And yeah, the camera was zooming in.
Yeah, they were always zoomed in on Harvey and I don't know why they were always zoomed in on him.
(14:59):
So initially I was actually thinking that Harvey may have been behind the whole substance.
Yeah, me too.
We never find out who it was, but that's black market.
You don't know who you're buying from.
I don't even think she paid anyone for these drugs.
Unless she did like a cash app or a Venmo transaction, PayPal, whatever.
She's just literally going to this mailbox every so often to get her shit.
(15:23):
Yeah, and it's like a dark alleyway.
Yeah, it's so fucking weird.
She goes in this dark alleyway and it's like she opens up the shutter door with a key card
and you go in and the room is completely fucking white like it's men in black.
She goes in there and she just picks up her weekly refills and it's fucking wild, man.
So here's how this all happened.
(15:44):
So she's trying to remember.
Okay, I think she was all upset leaving.
Oh, yes, she was all upset leaving the studio because she went to the men's bathroom
because the women's bathroom was out of order and she heard Harvey talking shit.
And of course, I knew this was going to be a weird ass movie, especially when we are like
(16:05):
right in Harvey's face as he's taking a piss.
And I'm just like, this is so in your face fucking like if you were doing drugs,
this would really fuck with you.
So she leaves this place and she gets in this car accident, perfectly fine, nothing wrong.
So she gets there, doctor's like, you're free to go, nothing wrong here.
But there's this other doctor or like a nurse really, I think more of a nurse.
(16:29):
And this nurse, really young looking, he's like, let me just do one more test on you.
And he's feeling her spine and he's like, you would make a perfect candidate.
I mean, you're perfect, like kind of catching himself.
So do you think this guy worked for the company that made the substance or he's just someone that uses it?
I think just someone that uses it.
Okay.
Because we do find out like, well, we find out later that we see the older version of him
(16:55):
because this is what it is.
So this is the replicant version of an older man who I'm thinking wanted to be a nurse again,
but just younger looking and all that.
So she's leaving and he hands her a USB stick.
So she goes home, she puts the USB stick in her TV, could have viruses, malware, we don't know.
(17:15):
But instead it's just like this ridiculous commercial for the substance.
Very vague, but telling to give a call, all that, if you're looking for, you know, the better your life or to rejuvenate, whatever.
So she throws it away, but then she sees this article about how she's going to be replaced.
Like we're trying to find the new Elizabeth Sparkle because what she is, she's one of those like fitness gurus.
(17:40):
Kind of like, what's his name?
I think you're going to get it before I am.
Oh, Richard Simmons.
Thank you.
Kind of like the Richard Simmons, but it had like the 80s look with the fucking leg warmers and skin tight spandex, all that stuff.
It has all that.
So that kind of confused me a little bit trying to figure what time period this was set in.
Yeah.
(18:00):
This has got to be like early 90s maybe.
Right.
Mid 90s, right?
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I'm thinking this is like mid 90s has to be because if you look at the clothing, everything, like the styles, it's still like that time period.
So yeah, I'm thinking this is like the early 90s, something like that, based on how everyone kind of looks.
So she finds this out and she ends up going out drinking.
(18:24):
She comes home.
She grabs that thing from the fucking garbage, the USB drive, calls it and she's like, oh, I'm going to go get this.
She grabs that thing from the USB drive, calls the number and says she's interested.
And this is when she starts getting a package in the mail and it has like all this stuff.
It has like the food for the week and the injection fluid, all this stuff to get started.
(18:45):
Yeah.
So like when she originally watches the ad for this shit and it's explaining how it all works, the fact that you have to essentially feed your dead body, because the way that it works is you can inject yourself and then it's seven days.
So you have to switch into this and your other body essentially.
But while this is happening, you have to feed your dead body and this kit includes the food.
(19:07):
It's basically mush inside of a bag.
Exactly.
But look ahead.
No, no, I was going to say, so she sees all this in that video and she was just, she must have been in a really bad place to just think this sounded like a great idea and to go along with it.
I really want to know what she paid for it.
Yeah, I'd like to know too, because clearly this is not something cheap.
(19:28):
Or she has that kind of she has that fuck money where she could just buy all sorts of shit or they maybe just did it for free because they don't or they wanted to get it out there to select audiences.
They don't want to make it like a widespread thing though, because then everyone would have a fucking replicant.
She's got that Virgil money.
Yeah, exactly.
That Virgil money.
(19:48):
So she.
RIP.
Yeah, RIP.
So she decides to inject herself with this stuff and she's standing there naked.
61 year old Demi Moore standing there naked.
I'm like, I didn't think I was going to see this today or this year.
So yeah, she injects herself and she's like, I feel fine.
And then that's when you see the fucking whole crazy transformation happening.
(20:11):
Dude, this scene was so perfectly well done.
The, well, the practical effects of her fucking back splitting open.
Yep.
It was gross.
I'm not going to lie.
I actually cringed a little bit when this was happening because her back splits open and then you see another body for Sue.
Yeah, we don't know her yet, but we see Sue crawling out of her fucking body.
(20:32):
So fucking wild, man, that she just completely like replicated herself and just slides out of her own back and like that whole new form.
It's so crazy.
I know when I'm trying to like I was talking to people about this movie trying to describe to them what the substance was.
And I'm like, yeah, essentially you inject yourself with this stuff and then a clone of yourself rips out of your back.
(20:53):
Yeah, that's exactly it.
It just, you start, and they're like, excuse me, what?
That's like the way to explain it, man.
So now you have Sue and she comes into play.
She's just standing there naked the whole time, just like looking at herself because clearly like you're just now a younger version of yourself, a complete replicant.
(21:14):
And so the thing with this is that it's the same person.
This is important to remember.
It's the same person, just different bodies, different times.
So either way, it's still Elizabeth Sparkle.
One is just Sue, which is the young version.
The older version is Elizabeth Sparkle.
So Sue decides she's going to go and audition to be the new Elizabeth Sparkle.
(21:38):
Naturally gets it because this girl is fucking flawless looking.
Absolutely flawless.
So this is kind of hilarious, too, because I don't want to try this with my boss, but I'm going to or, you know, if I ever get another job, I'm going to be like, hey, yeah, I'm only coming in every other week.
Yeah, I know, right.
In my initial interview.
Yeah, because that's what she did.
And the guy was like, yeah, you're so perfect.
(22:00):
That's fine.
That's exactly it.
Harvey was all about it.
And he's just like, whatever it takes, we want you in this.
I'm only coming to work every other week.
Like, what the fuck?
It's like, OK, yeah, can I have that kind of job?
Shit.
Good for her, though.
Good for her to be able to just do that.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was pretty wild.
So yeah, she gets this job.
(22:20):
Harvey is all excited.
And what happens is every other week, Sue's gone, then it's Elizabeth Sparkle.
Elizabeth Sparkle, by the way, gets fired from her job because they got Sue.
And naturally, Elizabeth Sparkle wasn't exactly happy about it.
But at least Sue has a job now.
And, you know, she's the new shiny thing.
They're all excited about her, and numbers are great, all this shit.
(22:45):
But the idea is she has to stabilize so she can stay in the body for seven days.
Like, she almost has to, like, feed off of the host version, which is Elizabeth Sparkle.
So Sue has to, like, pull fluid from Elizabeth's back.
And she would inject that into her daily.
(23:05):
And that's how they would be stable for a week, and then repeat the process.
She goes down, Elizabeth back up.
So it's like one week off, one week on.
Sounds like she's in the army.
That's basically the schedule.
So Sue started blowing up.
She's like all over fucking the news and everything.
Billboards.
She's got a giant billboard of herself right outside of the apartment they live in.
(23:28):
I know, man.
Right outside, just staring right at Elizabeth the whole time.
And this is not sitting well with Elizabeth.
Elizabeth is starting to want to spend more and more time in the body of Sue.
So she's like, oh, you know what?
I'll just pull a little more fluid.
We'll have one more day.
And she's like pulling this fluid and put, like, reusing these fucking containers.
(23:50):
And she's just injecting herself with it.
But when she's doing that, she's upsetting the balance.
So now that she's upsetting the balance, her normal body, the host body, is getting real fucked up.
So that was a question I had when she initially watched that ad for this stuff.
Did they say what was going to happen if they didn't switch back in the seven day time frame?
(24:11):
Uh, no, they didn't.
OK, so she's just essentially making herself rot away and she knows it.
Yeah, exactly.
So she's just making herself rot away and it starts to get worse and worse.
And dude, it gets really fucking bad.
But before I get to that fucking craziness, she starts, like, kind of spiraling.
So Elizabeth is really starting to lose herself, thinking that, like, Sue is a completely different entity than her.
(24:38):
But they are one in the same.
Think of it as, like, alter ego stuff, like almost split personality.
So Sue is her split personality.
It's like the girl that she wants to be.
She wants to relive her glory years in the body of this girl.
But she's basically lost her fucking mind and she's just going on these food binges and just doing all sorts of shit.
(24:58):
So leaving the mess for Sue to clean up after the fucking awful vacation that Elizabeth takes.
It's almost like Elizabeth punishes herself thinking that it's going to hurt Sue, but to the same fucking person.
She's only hurting herself.
It's pretty wild to think of because you're not.
I don't think you're thinking of like me personally.
I wasn't thinking of that while I was watching it.
I'm just thinking Sue and Elizabeth are two completely different people.
(25:21):
Right, but they're not.
But they're not.
It's a younger copy of Elizabeth.
So Elizabeth is basically punishing herself the whole time for doing this thing.
Like that's the way I'm seeing it.
She's just punishing herself because she doesn't like her body how it is now because she's 61 or in her 60s.
So obviously when it comes to Hollywood, it's all about biggest and brightest, new starlets.
(25:44):
It's all about the bright and shiny new thing.
And Elizabeth Sparkle is not the bright and shiny new thing.
Sue is though.
So Elizabeth is spiraling and she's thinking that Sue is in control and is taking over.
So dude, Sue starts fucking like emptying Elizabeth with that fucking fluid.
That's the only way I could think of it.
(26:05):
She fucking drains her dry.
Just drains her dry.
Oh my God.
We forgot to...
I wanted to talk about this.
So how the fuck did Sue build that entire room by hand in the back of the apartment?
I know that's pretty impressive.
Like literally a secret room.
Yeah, just built a secret room in the bathroom.
Just stored the body in there because you can't just have a naked body laying on the floor all the time.
(26:28):
You have to put it somewhere.
It's going to raise concerns for people coming over.
And Sue starts having younger guys coming over and they're doing things.
And yeah, it gets to a point where she's drained her so much that she's like aged.
She's really aged.
Like half her face is just old.
And we're starting to get into the territory where I'm affected by the sounds.
(26:51):
And like...
Another really good sound design.
Yeah.
You know, they did great with the sound design in this movie.
Absolutely.
The sound design was amazing.
The fucking knee.
That's what I'm talking about.
Her trying to get up from the chair,
but because she's been fucking drained like crazy by Sue,
her knee like in old state.
(27:13):
It's just super fucking old.
It aged by just pulling that fluid out of her.
So balance is all fucked up.
Elizabeth is much older looking now, very disheveled, going gray, all this stuff.
And the transformation was insane to see though.
It was really...
No, no, I was going to say it's like what you'd think would happen as you age,
(27:35):
but all of this is literally happening within a week.
Yeah, I know.
Like a week, two weeks, it's rapid.
The aging process is rapid.
And like the way she's pulling this fluid is from her back.
And like there's this little hole in her back.
So Sue gets fed up with Elizabeth's shit
because Elizabeth is just raising hell now.
(27:56):
She's like making the house a ginormous mess.
And she's like, fuck this.
She starts taking all this fluid and she's like putting it in like fucking mason jars and shit.
Just emptying her.
So she starts doing that.
And Sue, she's about to host the New Year's Eve Ball or whatever show.
It's like the biggest show of the year.
(28:17):
Millions of people are watching.
So she's about to host it.
And then she finds out like she sees her nose bleeding.
She has to re-up.
She has to get more of that fucking fluid injected in her so she can maintain.
Turns out she started pulling the fluid from her back and it's black.
It's clearly infected, whatever.
She calls this company up.
(28:37):
They're like she needs to take over so that way she can produce more fluid.
So that way it can be used on Sue.
So she decides to go under, see if she can make it happen for like a night.
And dude, she is fucking gross looking.
She looks like she aged to 150.
Yeah, and it got worse that she turned into like a monster.
(29:00):
Oh, it got so much worse.
So yeah, she turns like in this really old fucking person.
She's calling this company asking to terminate.
She does not want anything to do with this whole process anymore.
So she goes out in public and she's looking like one of those old ladies to hop on the fucking bus.
(29:22):
Minus the walker?
Yeah, she's got the like doesn't have a walker, but she's got like the hood on and like the scar and all this stuff.
And she picks up the termination fluid and drags Sue like a fucking maniac to the living room,
injects her with this termination fluid.
So I'm thinking, okay, it's done.
Sue's dead.
Like the process can't be reverted.
(29:44):
So she's going to forever live out her old self, which that's on her.
That could have ended there technically because that's like teaching yourself a lesson.
But I don't think it would have been like the best ending.
What we ended up getting was the best ending.
So she injects Sue with this termination fluid.
Sue's awake.
Elizabeth's awake.
(30:04):
They're both awake at the same time.
Now they're both self-fucking aware.
Sky net.
Yeah, sky net shit.
So they're both self-aware.
They're both like now two different entities.
So it's almost like she just split herself both ways, mind and body.
So Sue goes nuts, just beating the shit out of Elizabeth, pounds her into oblivion.
And you see this shift happen.
(30:27):
And it's like as soon as Elizabeth was dead, Sue inherited like everything, all the synapses
of the brain, all that shit.
So it's almost like Elizabeth's dead.
Now it's Sue going forward.
So she gets up, gets dressed, goes to the fucking studio.
And now we're starting to get into one of my other bugaboos.
(30:47):
Bugaboos, huh?
Yup.
Fucking tea stuff.
Oh my God, man.
Tell us about it, Steve.
Yeah.
So Sue starts coughing up a storm as she's done getting her makeup.
She goes to the bathroom, spitting teeth.
Teeth are just falling out of her head.
I love watching these movies with any of these things that I know make you tick because I
(31:10):
know you're cringing.
Oh yeah.
I'm big time cringing.
Whenever you're suffering, I'm happy.
Yeah, absolutely.
Geez, you bastard.
I just got fired.
Yeah, you're fired.
It's going to be James McAvoy from now on.
Yeah, I'm going to get James McAvoy from now.
I'm going to hit him up later.
All right, guys, this is my last episode.
(31:33):
I guess so.
My secret is out.
So, yep, your secret's out.
Sorry, Corey, you've been fired.
Replace.
Fuck yeah, finally.
See ya.
So yeah, she's spitting teeth at this point.
And now she's like, I got to go back home and fucking somehow re-up.
Or I guess there's still a little bit more of the fluid to get started.
So now she's trying to make a copy of a copy of a better version of herself.
(31:57):
Oh, you know what?
I want to go back to this real quick.
Is that I find it funny because this whole movie has to do with replication of a person.
Right?
Yeah.
So her mother, Annie McDowell, was in a movie called Multiplicity with Michael Keaton.
Have you seen my baseball?
Yeah, have you seen my baseball?
(32:18):
So yeah, she was in a replicant movie as well.
I actually didn't know that.
I didn't even think that was her daughter, to be honest.
But apparently it is.
So it's really cool seeing this whole new wave of actors coming into Hollywood, which
are second generation shit.
So like Randy Quaid, he's another one that's fucking in Hollywood.
So you have Dennis Quaid, Randy Quaid.
(32:40):
Randy's absolutely insane.
Yeah, he's nuts.
He's bonkers.
I actually regret not meeting him at Rhode Island Comic-Con last year.
You should have.
Yeah, but he was charging more than like fucking Seth Green was in like the Sons of Anarchy
cast.
I think it was like $250 for like a signature.
It was something insane.
That's nuts.
And I was just like, dude, you don't have a fucking line for a reason.
(33:02):
Like you've done maybe one or two movies.
Like people know you from the Vacation series.
That's it.
Exactly.
Yeah.
So those fucking Quaids.
Yeah, geez, too much.
So she decides to inject herself with like the fluid that they would use initially to
get the replicant.
And the crazy thing about this is that on the first iteration of the replicant, you
(33:24):
see the eyes splitting in half, which is fucking sick.
Mm hmm.
Yeah, it looked amazing.
Yeah, I thought that was so cool looking.
But now we see like 10 eyes happening.
And I'm like, oh, shit's about to get real fucked up.
And dude, what comes from it is something straight out of fucking The Last of Us.
Mm hmm.
(33:45):
Yep.
It's a monster with teeth in the chest and just a slanted head.
Elizabeth Sparkle's face is sticking out the back.
It's fucking.
It does look like it was infected with cordyceps.
Yeah.
It's fucking wild, man.
So she rips off Elizabeth Sparkle's face from a painting.
(34:06):
Not a painting, like just an oversized photo in the living room, glues it to her face,
tries to put on the blue dress.
It's all fucked up.
And she rolls up to the studio.
She opens the door.
She's got this face taped to her wearing the blue dress.
And the guy's like, we've been waiting for you.
Come on.
And you see this scene where everyone's clapping.
(34:28):
They're excited to see her.
And I'm thinking to myself the whole time, is this like literally in her head because.
Yep.
I thought she was hallucinating as well.
Yeah, which actually I think she was as soon as she got to like the hallway.
So you would think if this was real, they'd notice some shit's happening because she's
looking massive, like a fucking monster.
She's just walking around like that type deal, almost something like out of Toxic Avenger
(34:52):
or something.
Yeah.
So crazy shit.
So she goes out on stage, her mask falls off and everyone is freaking the fuck out.
So they're attacking her and all this shit and her hand falls off.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
She's just slowly decomposing in front of everyone.
(35:13):
Yep.
Oh, you know what?
I wanted to talk about this one thing too, because I thought this was funny.
So obviously remember she lost her teeth in the bathroom, but then she was going in the
elevator and her ear fell off.
So she was straight up trying to be Mick Foley.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So she's on stage and they're attacking her, her hand falls off and blood everywhere, spraying
(35:37):
the whole audience.
It is everyone is fucking covered head to toe in blood.
So that's so you're mentioning that here.
Apparently there is a special thanks in the credit to all the extras in that theater scene
who got covered in blood.
I would hope so.
Because yeah, there was a lot of people in that.
(35:58):
I just picture a, you know, a talk show audience.
There's a lot of people there.
Yeah.
So it's like a fucking gore concert.
Exactly.
It was like a gore concert.
So I'm thinking too, like the last time I seen something that bloody, maybe Blade.
Remember what the blood shower scene where everyone is fucking covered in blood.
Yeah.
Like that.
Everyone's just covered head to toe in fucking blood.
(36:19):
So she manages to escape and her leg falls off as she's trying to get away and she falls
and explodes everywhere.
Oh man.
We sound like we're making this shit up.
We are not.
No, no, this is all happened.
This is all actually happened.
This is factual.
This is the fucking movie.
(36:39):
It's real life.
It's real life.
So the body fucking explodes on the ground and what's left over is the part of the back,
which had Elizabeth Sparkle's face and she's like the around it was like a hunk of meat.
So she's fucking crawling around like the fucking blob and she crawls to the star on
the walk of fame on top of her star and you have confetti falling down and all this stuff
(37:04):
and her face eventually disappears and it's just the star and that's how it ends.
Yeah.
The ending was perfect.
The ending was amazing.
Another non happy ending.
Yep.
Another non happy ending.
It was fucking great.
So yeah, I love this.
Corey, what do you give the substance?
I think it's pretty obvious that it's going to get a five out of five for me.
(37:25):
I think it was absolutely perfect.
Again, one of my favorite movies of the year.
I'll probably watch this several times and I feel like it's one of those movies you can
watch and you're going to pick something new up every time because there are absolutely
messages in this movie.
Coralie Farge did amazing.
Absolutely incredible.
Can't wait to see more from her.
Performances by Demi and Margaret were next level amazing.
(37:46):
The score was amazing.
Cinematography, practical effects.
I might actually pick this one up on vinyl because I know Waxworks put it out, but yeah,
not enough good things to say about this movie.
Like I just gushing about it, you know?
Yeah, we've been gushing about it this whole time.
We fucking love this movie.
I can't wait to get that score.
This score was fantastic.
(38:06):
It was just...
Yeah, it's...
While you're talking, I'm going to look.
I think it's Waxworks that did it.
If Waxworks has it, I'm all about it.
I'm going to get that shit because I love every part of this fucking sound.
It's very...
I don't want to say new wave.
It's almost like when you're standing outside of a club and you hear the club beats, but
it's almost muted in a way.
(38:28):
Just like that type, you know that type sound?
And it's like that...
Oh yeah.
Like most of the fucking movie.
It is Waxworks, by the way.
I just sent you a link.
All right, cool.
I'm going to have to check that out.
So all right, I'm going to go into my review on this as well.
I'm going with a five.
Zero out of five.
Zero out of five hated it.
Negative five out of five.
Fuck this movie.
Let's talk about corn.
(38:49):
Yeah, let's talk about corn.
Yeah, I'm going to go with a five out of five on this one as well.
This movie was absolutely unhinged.
I feel like this movie is in the same vein as the menu where not a lot of marketing went
behind it, so it flew under the radar.
Demi Moore was great in this, and it's been a long time since I've seen her in a movie.
(39:09):
I think, like I was saying, the last one I saw her in was Mr. Brooks.
The score was awesome, and I think the idea behind this movie is it's a social commentary
in that when beauty fades and it's all that people know you for, then you begin to kind
of lose yourself and will do anything to bring you back to your glory years.
(39:31):
So it's almost like you focus so much on the exterior rather than the interior.
So that's the whole idea of Robin Sparkles.
No, Robin Sparkles.
I'm sorry.
Wrong show.
Wrong show.
Let's go to the mall.
Let's go to the mall.
And hey, that's oh my God, what a great blooper.
(39:54):
I'm keeping that in obviously.
The hell yeah.
Because I think I've been wanting to say Robin Sparkles this whole time.
It's funny.
That is too funny.
I completely forgot that that was her name and how I met your mother.
I didn't make the connection with the substance in that.
I should have.
It makes perfect sense.
Yeah, you really should have, but that's okay.
(40:15):
I've been watching it like race you lately.
So I think that's the commentary here is that you need to appreciate yourself and not
focus so much on the superficial, the exterior.
And I think that's the overall idea behind this movie.
And in her case, she was focused so much on the exterior to the point where she would
(40:36):
do anything to get that back and it eventually destroyed her.
So the effects in this were great.
Same thing.
I loved the cinematography.
Whenever Harvey was on screen, it was bold and in your face and clearly him being as
aggravating as humanly possible.
And that's kind of what it's like when someone is really just aggravating.
(40:58):
It's almost like they're just in your face, don't want them there, that kind of deal.
And that's what Harvey was.
When people ask me what's a good body of horror movie, not that any sane person may ask me
that.
I'll say the substance, hands down.
Oh yeah.
Yeah, there's really nothing else that would be at the top of my brain if someone asked
me that question, the mess having seen it now.
(41:18):
Yeah, the only thing I can think of is Tusk.
Yeah, but that was more like a comedy horror movie.
I mean, Kevin Smith made that and I love the movie.
You know, Josh Long was great in it, but I wouldn't put that on the same level as a substance
because it was more of a comedy, I feel.
Yeah, it was more of a comedy.
It was made from a joke.
I saw that in theaters.
(41:39):
Did you?
Good for you.
I don't know.
You know, I wanted to do it because of Kevin Smith, but it wasn't the best movie.
No, it really wasn't.
It was a joke of a movie.
It's body horror all day, like just start to finish.
But there isn't as much of a story behind that as there is with the substance.
(41:59):
The substance has layers to it and if you watch it over and over, you're really going
to see the hidden story behind this whole movie, the hidden concept.
I think that's the beauty of this movie is that it had this whole undertone regarding
vanity.
Not everyone's going to be beautiful for the fucking rest of their lives.
(42:20):
We all get old, we fucking look horrid.
It's going to happen.
In this case, Robin, Jesus Christ, you did it again.
Elizabeth couldn't deal with that.
So she was trying to do everything she could to get those glory days back.
Have you seen Ted?
(42:42):
Have you met Ted?
I need that in my life.
Just go out with some younger folks like I have been and they just go, have you met Steve?
I go, oh shit, now I gotta fucking talk to a 25 year old girl?
This is going to be interesting.
I met him last year, Josh Radner.
Did you?
(43:02):
Yeah, he was at Rhode Island Comcon.
Yeah, how was he?
I think he was drunk, but it was good.
Otherwise, he didn't have much of a line.
He had the blue horn with him.
Yeah, that's to be expected.
I don't know, Ted's okay.
He's fine.
He's not the best on that show.
No, Barney is.
But it all revolves around him.
Barney is hands down the best on that show.
All right, everyone, be sure to like, follow, and subscribe on Facebook, X, Instagram, TikTok,
(43:26):
threads, and YouTube.
Leave us a five star review on all podcast platforms so we can get some more exposure.
Of course, tell your friends.
Both our intro and outro music are courtesy of Andrew Scott Bell.
Be sure to check out Andrew on all major streaming platforms.
And if you see Winnie the Pooh, Blood and Honey on vinyl in the wild, be sure to pick
it up.
We're also part of the Shining Wizards Network.
(43:47):
Be sure to visit ShiningWizardsNetwork.com.
They're an awesome podcast network ranging from wrestling to heavy metal, horror, all
that good stuff.
So check that out.
Visit 30ScreamsOfLess.com for all previous episodes and transcripts to go with those
episodes.
Also, check out BeardOctane.com for their whole line of grooming supplies.
And be sure to use the code 30Screams10 at checkout for 10% off your order.
(44:12):
And if there's anything you want us to review, send an email to 30ScreamsOfLess at gma.com
or hit us up on social media.
Use hashtag 30ScreamsOrLess.
And also, we have some awesome merch for sale on our website.
So definitely check that out.
If you go to our website at the very top, there's a shop link.
Click that link and you'll see all sorts of shirts, hats, mugs, things like that.
(44:34):
If you buy it, it helps going towards our hosting costs.
I'm Steve.
I'm Corey.
And thanks for listening to 30 Screams Or Less.
And don't forget to drink your beans.
Welcome everyone.
You just said something right in the middle.
(44:58):
Yeah.
Just cut me right off.
Right at the beginning there.
Ah, shit.
Reset.
Reset.
Redo.
Edit.
Right.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams.
Yeah.
Just cut me off every time.
(45:26):
You want to know something funny?
Yes.
Someone bought something off me from eBay.
Guess what their last name was?
Hatfield.
Lehman.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams Or Less.
No shit.
I'm serious.
I'm serious.
What's his name?
Ari?
(45:47):
It was over 40 bucks.
It wasn't.
No, it wasn't.
It was, I think some girl.
Okay.
His wife, maybe?
You kidding me?
He's not.
No way.
He has a companion.
No, I doubt it.
He's too busy using fake machetes still.
All right.
Good for him.
Good for him.
All right.
Game face.
Ready.
Welcome everyone to 30 Screams Or Less.
You all right?
(46:08):
I tried to mute myself.
I started laughing.
I can edit all this stuff out.
That's the funny thing.
Yeah, but why would you?
Jesus Christ.
Okay.
Okay.
Do you exhale?
Okay.
Game face.
We're good.
Why is there such long fucking clock?
(46:37):
Because I'm waiting to see if you're just going to fuck with me there.
I didn't.
You fucked with yourself.
I'm just like, wait for it.
Nope, nothing now.
I just ruined it myself.
No, I'll sneak the fuck ups or the fuck ins later on, whatever they're called.
Fuck ups.
Fuck with Steve's.
Fuck yeah.
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