March 25, 2025 • 28 mins
When do you speak up and when do you walk away? This provocative question frames our entire conversation as we navigate the delicate balance between social responsibility and personal safety in today's increasingly confrontational world.
Please note: there is some mild swearing involved so it may not be suitable for little ears!!
Jane opens by observing the heightened anger permeating society, particularly around politics, and questions how this emotional climate affects our daily interactions. "You can stay strong, be strong, protect yourself, have your own boundaries and have a voice without being an a$$hole," she notes, setting the stage for a nuanced discussion about appropriate intervention.
The mother-daughter dynamic creates fascinating tension throughout the episode, especially when discussing specific scenarios. While both agree they would defend vulnerable populations like children and elderly people being mistreated, they sharply disagree on other situations. Their most surprising disagreement emerges when discussing theft – Bobbi admits she wouldn't report someone stealing essentials like baby formula or food, while Jane expresses genuine shock at this perspective.
The generational differences between Jane and Bobbi reveal how personal experiences shape our intervention thresholds and risk assessment.
Whether you're someone who readily speaks up or tends to avoid confrontation, this episode will make you examine your own boundaries for involvement. Join the conversation and share your perspectives – when do YOU get involved, and what factors influence that decision? Email us at boomerandgenx@gmail.com with your thoughts and experiences.
email: boomerandgenxer@gmail.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:10):
Welcome everyone to today's show.
A boomer and a Gen Xer walkinto a bar coming to you from
the Rabbit Run Studios becausemom is still on the road, where
you, as a listener, willexperience some wit and wisdom,
some smart assery and a motherand daughter questioning.
Are we even related?
My name is Bobbi Joy and myco-host is my mom, jane, and for
(00:34):
the next little while we aregoing to try to entertain you.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yes, we are, and so I've been thinking about a topic
for this week and, you know,some of the things that I've
been observing have beenbehavioral issues with people,
and there's a lot of anger outthere associated, obviously,
with the political arena.
(01:00):
There always is.
There always is Every fouryears.
Everybody wants to have a heartattack over all this stuff and
it's like calm down, slow yourroll, hooker.
You know we don't.
We don't need to get allexcited about this and quit
being a pawn for your politicalparty.
They don't give a rat's assabout you.
They don't know your name, theydon't care whether you live or
(01:22):
die.
Come on, stop it.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Stop, yeah, because even if you die, they'll still
use your vote.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Or you may still get social security.
We're not really sure.
So, anyway, just quit it.
Just quit it.
Nobody deserves that kind ofattention or energy.
But what I have noticed isthere are a lot of people who
are acting out and there are alot of things that we observe,
and whether it's somebody who'slosing their cool in a
(01:56):
restaurant or at a retailestablishment, or if it is
something that's going down likeyou see a theft, you see
somebody being abused, you seesomething going on and you go,
wow, you know, that's just deadwrong right there.
The question is, and our topicfor today is when do you get
(02:18):
involved?
When would you get involved?
And so I kind of want to talkabout that today, because back
in my younger days I'll behonest with you I had a Back
when the dinosaurs roamed,that's right.
Stop it Back in the day when Iwas younger I'll be honest I had
(02:40):
a lot of energy and I had a lotof negative energy and for some
reason, when you're younger,you feel like you need to fight
about everything, and I thinkpeople have misinterpreted when
we say stay strong, be strong,have a voice.
You know you can stay strong,be strong, protect yourself,
(03:01):
have your own boundaries andhave a voice without being an
asshole, Right?
And so I think that it kind ofgave everybody a green light to
just act however they wanted to,and it's okay.
That's my truth, that's who Iam.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I'm protecting.
No, my favorite is the oh, Ihave the First Amendment right
to free speech and it's like,yeah, you do have that First
Amendment right, but you don't.
You're not like once you saysomething, you're not immune to
the consequences.
Exactly you know what happensdepending on what you say.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Exactly, and I think that you know, for me personally
, when I was younger, obviouslyI was much bolder.
That's hard to believe, isn'tit?
Because I pretty much sayanything I want to say.
But with that said, you know, Ireally wasn't that interested
(04:00):
in people's feelings or how,what the outcome was, because I
felt like I had a right.
I had a right to say it and Ihad a right to do the things
that I wanted to do.
And let the chips fall wherethey may.
And the fact of the matter is,is folks being strong, being a
strong, independent person,whether you're male or female,
(04:22):
being a strong, strong person,having your own ideas, having
your independence, having youknow, the tenacity to stand up
to what's right and wrong orwhat's wrong, for that matter,
you know, doesn't mean that youget to be vulgar, it doesn't
mean that you get to be mean, itdoesn't mean that you get to
(04:42):
intervene at any given time.
And so, again, my question iswhen do you get involved?
When would you get involved?
So we've talked about thisbefore.
You know, back in my time, thereused to be a saying that said
you know, it takes a village toraise a child, and what that
(05:03):
meant was.
We were all looking out foreach other and the parents were
looking out for each other'skids, and if we got in trouble
by somebody at the school, ourparents didn't go defend us.
They didn't go defend ourbehavior.
We got our butts whooped and wehad to respect those in
(05:28):
authority.
And you know people go well, wedon't have to respect everybody
in authority.
Yeah, you kind of have torespect everybody for that
matter.
And, um, you know, I've heardpeople also say you know you
have to earn respect.
Well, as a human being, I thinkeverybody deserves respect as a
human being.
(05:48):
Now, once you get past being ahuman being, you know if you're
nice to me, I'll be nice to you.
You be rude to me doesn't meanI'm going to be rude back, and I
think that's kind of where oursociety is today.
So I really want to talk aboutif you walk into a restaurant
and you sit down loud andobnoxious or really being
(06:11):
downright rude to the waitress,or let's say that the waitress
(06:36):
was being downright rude to acustomer, would you feel like
you needed to get involved,bobby?
What do you think?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Well, a few points before I answer that.
You know, one thing is it'sgood to have a voice and it's
good to stand your ground andstuff like that.
But let's be honest, somepeople just use that as an
excuse to be an asshole and say,well, I have the right to have
it, okay.
Well, no, you're just anasshole.
So let's just get that out ofthe way right now.
(07:05):
You know, and we do have thatbystander effect is what it's
called, and I think a lot of usdo fall prey to that, because
not only is it, you know, we'retaught to mind our own business,
things like that, but it, youknow, today's day, day and age,
it can be dangerous to step inthat's exactly right, life
(07:29):
threatening.
Life threatening, uh, to stepbetween somebody, because I and
I'm gonna say you got a bunch ofpussies out here carrying guns
that are gonna rip it out at anylittle thing, yeah, and you
know they could just gofisticuffs and be over it.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Right.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
But you know, when it comes down to it, I would
definitely assess the situationIf I had.
You know, when my kids weresmall.
That would be something I wouldthink about protecting my kids,
things like that.
But I'm not one to keep mymouth shut, especially in public
, if I see someone who you knowis being rude, disrespectful
(08:07):
things like that.
Because see, a lot of peopleare like, well, take the high
road and kill them with kindness.
No, baby, you go low, I take itstraight to hell because you're
going to be rude to somebody youdon't have no idea of what you
have just opened up in me,because I don't care.
I don't know you from, you knowfrom Adam, and I really don't
(08:30):
care what you think, and I'm notgoing to stand by and let
someone verbally or physicallyattack someone else just because
they think they have the rightto.
And you know that's where weget the Karen's and things like
that.
Oh, you're being a Karen.
Yeah, I will step in, Iabsolutely will, and I'm not
saying that I'll physically stepin their face, but you're going
(08:52):
to hear my mouth, but do youthink that's going overboard?
Speaker 2 (08:55):
Do you think that's where some of this you know?
I guess, as I see peopleyelling at each other, it's like
just spewing so much venom andhatred.
And you know, like I said backin the day I I was probably more
vocal and I was more willing torun my mouth.
People ask me if I exercise.
Well, I run my mouth a lot.
(09:16):
Does that count?
I run away from my problems Irun away from my problems, um,
but you know, I used to go toevery fight I was invited to and
as you get older and wiser, Ithink that for me anyway and I'm
only giving my perspective youknow, I look around and I go do
(09:36):
I have a dog in this fight?
You know, if I have a dog inthe fight, then yeah, I'll
probably get involved.
But I've toned it down a lotbecause I I'll be honest with
you.
I think that you can, you candeescalate people pretty easily.
And you know, I've been in somesituations here recently that
(09:56):
I've had people yelling at meand I just, you know, I've
looked at them and I've said,listen, I'm not talking to you
disrespectfully, please don'ttalk to me that way.
And you know, let's just have aregular conversation and and
let's just talk about what theissue is.
And I think that we sometimeslook at people's behavior more
(10:20):
so than we look at what theirtopic matter is.
Do you know what I mean by that?
Like if you're mad aboutsomething and you come in and
you're all enraged and you'resaying, hey, somebody hit my car
and you're just being an assabout it.
Sometimes we have to look pastthat and say okay, I need you to
(10:41):
calm down.
And of course, telling somebodyto calm down is, like you know,
kicking a wet chicken, right.
But um, I think that, uh, youknow, we have to kind of look at
what the topic is.
What is it they're reallytrying to say?
And when you kids were growingup I used to say that too.
I used to say you know how theysay, it is really not as
(11:03):
important to me as what they'resaying.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Well, and I mean that's also situational you know
you're talking about somebodywho's like, let's say, you're in
a restaurant and somebody isgoing off on the waitress and
you know being derogatory, usingracial slurs, things like that,
just out of nowhere, like theyhave no right, no reason, no
meaning Not that anybody has aright or a reason to do that.
(11:40):
But there's no basis for this,other than you know they just
want to be an asshole to thisperson that they think is below
them.
Now, yeah, you can come at thatperson and be soft and kind and
things.
Normally.
That doesn't work Normally thatdoesn't work.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
I wouldn't say normally doesn't.
I've been pretty successfulwith it.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I don't know, with strangers People I know, yeah, I
can usually talk them down orsay, hey, wait a second.
You know your tone of voice iscompletely overshadowing what
you're trying to say, type ofthing.
But you know, when it comes tostrangers, I think that we need
to grab their attention awayfrom the person that they are
(12:13):
directing it at, because I'lltake it like, you know, I'll
look right at him and go, Ooh,excuse me, I'm going to step in
this Now.
This person has nothing to dowith it.
You direct your anger at mebecause I got, I got, I, I
you're dead inside.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Okay, well, yeah, I'm going to clear my schedule
because I have time today.
You're going to clear yourschedule.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Like I just wrote you in yeah, Well, and I get it.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
I mean I see both sides.
I mean there are times when Ihave you know, there are times
when I just really want to ripsomebody's head off, right.
And so I want to get back to myoriginal question.
You go into an establishmentlet's say it's a restaurant and
somebody is, let's say thatthey're really just being
(13:04):
terribly, terribly rude to thewaitress, and you kind of notice
the waitress isn't being a jerkand she's doing the best she
can.
And maybe it's her first day.
And I've always said I don'tknow everybody's story.
I don't know what happened toher before she came here, I
don't know if her kid is sick, Idon't know if her dog just died
(13:28):
, I don't know if she's fourmonths behind on her rent, I
don't know.
And so somebody is just being areally jerk, bad jerk.
To this waitress you would saysomething, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Absolutely, and I would make sure that everybody
heard it too, because I willshame that person one way or the
other for how they're acting,because there's no reason for it
.
You need you know.
You don't need to be like that.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
You don't need to be like that.
Yeah, so you're gonna come backat them with the same energy
that they're giving her oh,absolutely isn't that kind of
dangerous.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
I mean, that seems dangerous to me well, I mean it
can be, but, like I said, youknow, everybody wants to be like
, oh, you need to take the highroad.
No, baby, my road is low.
And like I will take it,because a lot of people who are
at that point already kind ofneed that shock value of someone
(14:29):
coming at them and going, youknow, that same energy at them
and then slowly bring it down,if it's possible, you know, and
if it's not possible, whereyou're able to bring it down to,
you know, a calmer place, thenI mean, like I said, I got all
day.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Yeah, yeah, I think you know you really have to
assess and you know, I think thereason some people just really
don't want to get involved ordon't want to say anything is
because they're scared.
You mentioned that earlier.
You don't know when somebody isgoing to pull a gun, because
they're, you know, just hellbent, for you know being an
idiot that day.
(15:08):
But well, let's take it a stepfurther then.
What if you saw somebody andI'm, I'm always for the underdog
right.
So if I see an old person or akid being brutalized, I'm I'm
(15:28):
all over it I'm all over it.
What?
What are you gonna say?
We were, we were brutalized.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Mom, wait a minute yeah, I, I, yeah, I'm kind of
50-50 on that.
Now, if it's like a young kid,you know, type of thing and
they're being abused, or like aI can't even say a really old
person, because I have heardsome of the stuff come out of
these old people's mouths andI'm like you never got hit in
the face did you?
Because otherwise you would notbe saying things like that to
(15:56):
get you know, to start a fight,thinking that just because
you're old, I'm not going to hityou, type of thing.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
So I remember a news story where a and they showed
the video because there was athere was a camera on the
building where a guy came up andhe was going to try to take the
vehicle away from this old manand the old man he all he was
doing was walking up and to takethe vehicle away from this old
man and the old man he all hewas doing was walking up and
getting into his vehicle and theguy started just punching him
(16:23):
in the face, just beating him,beating him, beating him, and
the old man hung on to the doorand he hung on to the car.
Come to find out he was anex-marine, but he was an old guy
, right.
So you lose your.
You lose, you know, your muscletone and all that stuff as we
get older, and he just wasn't asstrong, but he hung tough and
(16:44):
what was really the saddest partof that was there were people
in the background just watchingit, yeah, and I thought, man,
that wouldn't be me.
I can't do.
Do that, I can't do it.
No, a child that, let's say, isyour youngest daughter's age, is
, you know, getting slappedaround or you know, just
(17:09):
something bad.
I mean, some kids deserve to beslapped around.
Let's say that it's a child.
That's your youngest daughter'sage, and okay, so like nine
yeah.
So you see someone and and youknow some kids don't get me
wrong, I have no problem withsomebody disciplining their kid
right.
(17:29):
I, you kids got spanked.
I got spanked, didn't kill us.
I know, bobby, dead silenceright there.
Um, let's say that you're, yousee this and they're really
being bad.
I mean it's, it's really bad.
(17:49):
Would you jump in?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
Would you say something bad?
Speaker 2 (17:53):
No, no, no.
Parent is really really, orwhoever the adult is, is really
really being horrible to thiskid.
Would you say something?
Absolutely okay, and I would,absolutely, I would too.
I, I would, I would probablysay something.
So let me take it a stepfurther.
You are in a convenience store,gas station, and you watch
(18:19):
someone stick stuff in theircoat pockets what is it?
Speaker 1 (18:26):
I don't know what it is.
Well, because I mean they'rehonest to god, like if I see you
stealing like actual food orbaby formula or diapers.
I didn't see nothing.
Okay, I'm sorry, I didn't seenothing, gosh seriously.
But if it's like alcohol orcigarettes or something, yeah,
I'll rat your ass out we have atotally different view of this.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Okay, so if I see someone who is stealing baby
formula or something that youknow, diapers or something like
that and they're not going toshove diapers into their pocket,
right, but it's something thatyou go oh man, they probably
need that, and it looks likethey need that I'm walking up to
the clerk and I'm gonna say,listen, I'll pay for that and so
(19:14):
and I've done that numeroustimes I've paid for their stuff.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Well, I would say, if they get caught by, like loss
prevention, I would be willingto step in if I'm able to and
say, hey, you know, I'll pay forit, let him go, type of thing.
Otherwise I didn't see nothing.
I didn't see nothing.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Oh, my goodness, Seriously, seriously, seriously,
seriously.
See, if somebody picked up apack of smokes, or they, you
know, shoved a turkey betweentheir legs and and we're walking
out under you know, it's undertheir dress, and uh, I'm saying
something.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I'm saying it's not my job.
It's not my job really.
You know what I mean.
Like it's not my job.
Now if, if they were likestealing like electronics or
something like, yeah, I might belike, hey, you guys want to get
on that, but I'd just walk awayLike that's not my job, bobby
but you understand that thereason a lot of stores close is
because of theft.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
And people get all upset because these stores are
closing and they say, oh, it'sbecause it's you know they're
racist and it.
Oh, it's because it's you knowthey're racist and it's because
it's a, you know, a blackneighborhood or it's a Hispanic
neighborhood or something likethat.
And yet it isn't because ofthat, it's because of the theft.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Look, if you're stealing food or baby
necessities.
I'm blind in one eye and I onlysee 50% out of the other eye.
I can't see nothing.
But if it's anything else, ifit's anything like electronics,
alcohol, tobacco, things likethat, I'd be like you know, I'd
be like motion and be like, hey,you know, you might want to
(20:53):
check them, type of thing.
But no, I mean honestly, I, andI'm going to be honest.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
There's times that I have been in the position where
I have had to do someunscrupulous things in order to
survive.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Now, it wasn't like I was stealing alcohol and stuff
like that, but it was things toliterally survive.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
And yeah, I didn't see shit, are you serious?
Oh my gosh, I didn't see shit.
Are you serious?
Because if it was for the kidsor something, all you'd have had
to do is call and ask for itand you would have gotten it.
Don't even, don't even.
Why would you have stolen it?
You had family members, theformula's expensive.
What I know but you're theformula's expensive.
Who are you kidding?
Speaker 1 (21:42):
I would have paid for it, or your dad would have paid
for it.
What are you kidding me?
Well, you gotta remember.
You gotta remember back in thetime that Corey was an infant,
he was on that specializedformula.
It was $60 a, can we?
Weren't exactly in the greatestof place relationship wise you
could have called your dad.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
He would have given it to you.
You could have called me anyway.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Hey, okay well let's get past that.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Let's get past that, because you know I'm going to
hammer you on that.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I mean like if I, if I saw, you know, like an 80 year
old woman stealing packs oflunch meat and a loaf of bread,
I didn't see nothing.
Okay, I did not see a damnthing, Sorry.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
See, I, I, I've seen that before and I I remember
this old guy.
Do you remember lynn'ssupermarket in uh yeah, in des
moines?
So yeah, they got the besthaunted house yeah, they do, or
they think they still do, Idon't know um, but anyway, this
old boy was in front of me and Iremember him putting some stuff
(22:42):
up on the belt and he leanedover and his jacket showed that
he had those breakfast sausagesin his back pocket.
What the hell was that?
Speaker 1 (22:59):
I know I'd have been like, sir, is that a sausage in
your pocket, or are we gonnahave an issue here?
Speaker 2 (23:06):
no, this was like you know.
This was back when you hadheard that.
You know, older people wereeating cat food and stuff
because they couldn't afford itand I remember the clerk seeing
it, because it's like it's along package, it's not like
you're gonna you know you're not, you're gonna miss it.
And so I remember him leaningover and she, she saw it and I
(23:28):
looked at her and I just, youknow, motioned, hey, I'll pay
for that.
And so it was no big deal.
But I, yeah, I just you know,that kind of stuff that that
makes me that pulls on myheartstrings, other stuff I'm
kind of like, hey, you need topay for that crap.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
You know, that's why stores go out of business in
your area like, let's say we'rein a walmart and I see a
teenager like grab an xbox andrun for that front door, I might
trip him.
Whoops, I helped.
Okay, you don't need that xbox,okay, sorry oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Well, I would be interested in what the what our
listeners have to say about it,because you and I obviously
don't agree.
We're on two different ends ofthe spectrum on this one for
sure, and it makes me sad now toknow that you know you didn't
reach out when you needed helpwith the kids.
I mean, I thought you you did,and so you know.
(24:30):
Sorry I wasn't there for you.
Bobby, we're not gonna boohooabout that now because we're
fine, uh, but anyway, I thinkthat's probably as far as we're
going to go today, unless youwant to add something, bob.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Well, here's a scenario, so let's do this one
real quick.
Let's say you see somebodythat's broken down on the side
of the road.
Yeah, you can't see who theperson is.
If it's man, woman, black,white, old, young, do you pull
over?
Speaker 2 (25:05):
Yeah, I do all the time.
Dr Domain and I, we pull overall the time.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Well, that's you together.
I'm talking by yourself.
Do you pull over?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
You know, that's a tough one because I have
unfortunately I have.
It's a tough one because I have, unfortunately I have.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
And there's and there's instances, you know,
even in this last January andthe year before, where these
off-duty officers even havepulled over to help a motorist
and one guy he pulls over tohelp a motorist that they hit a
deer.
Well, they didn't get cellreception because it's in the
middle of but fuck, egypt outhere where we don't get cell
(25:46):
reception anywhere.
And they walked up to thenearest house.
He goes let's walk up to thishouse and see if there's a
landline we can use, becausethere's no cell reception.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
And the homeowner shot him wow, yeah, I mean those
kind of stories.
You know, there are storieswhere you pull over and they get
shot.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Trying to help this motorist, yeah, or what do you
do?
Speaker 2 (26:12):
or the motorist something happens to them
because somebody pulls over.
Right, you know, somebody pullsover and you think they're
going to help you and they endup murdering you.
And, uh, you know, people sayI'm I'm kind of negative on this
.
I don't believe that I am, butI do believe there are a lot of
bad people out there.
I hear people all the time go.
There's so many good people outthere, you know, just cause you
(26:33):
do a good deed doesn't make youa good person.
I apologize, but it does not.
You can do a good deeds.
It doesn't make you a goodperson.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
That's like saying go to church makes me a good
person, right?
No, it doesn't.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
It doesn't, and so you know I do believe there are
a lot of bad people out therethat if you weren't being
watched or there wasn't sometype of rule or you weren't
required to do it for some otherreason, they sure as hell
wouldn't be good people or theywouldn't be doing good things.
So, yeah, if you're scared whenyou get broken down on the side
(27:13):
of the road that you're goingto get raped or murdered by
somebody on the side of the road, there's too many bad people
out there.
But I guess I would like toknow from our listeners, you
know, what do they think?
And you know, would you getinvolved?
And I understand the fearfactor, but, gosh, folks, I
(27:35):
think we still have to try ourbest to do the best we can for
each other.
Don we I think so yeah so,anyway, you and I didn't agree
this time, bobby, and that'sokay, but we appreciate
everybody joining us here atrabbit run studio.
Be sure to follow us.
(27:55):
We look forward to spendingtime with you guys every single
week.
Please like us and, um, youknow, if you have some positive
feedback for us or you have atopic you want us to talk about,
please, please, please, drop usa short email at boomer and gen
x or at gmailcom.
If you have some hate mail, youknow we've talked about this
(28:15):
before.
We're not interested.
We'll take your criticism.
We, we're.
We're tough skinned.
Bobby's dead inside.
I got tough skin, it don'tmatter.
Um, so, uh, you know, if you'vegot some criticism or something
that you want us to dodifferently, hey, talk to us
about it.
Until next week, I'm jane burtand I'm bobby joy and you're
(28:38):
stuck with us.
Peace out later.
Welcome everyone to today's show.
A boomer and a Gen Xer walkinto a bar coming to you from
the Rabbit Run Studios becausemom is still on the road, where
you, as a listener, willexperience some wit and wisdom,
some smart assery and a motherand daughter questioning.
Are we even related?
My name is Bobbi Joy and myco-host is my mom, jane, and for
(00:34):
the next little while we aregoing to try to entertain you.
Speaker 2 (00:38):
Yes, we are, and so I've been thinking about a topic
for this week and, you know,some of the things that I've
been observing have beenbehavioral issues with people,
and there's a lot of anger outthere associated, obviously,
with the political arena.
(01:00):
There always is.
There always is Every fouryears.
Everybody wants to have a heartattack over all this stuff and
it's like calm down, slow yourroll, hooker.
You know we don't.
We don't need to get allexcited about this and quit
being a pawn for your politicalparty.
They don't give a rat's assabout you.
They don't know your name, theydon't care whether you live or
(01:22):
die.
Come on, stop it.
Speaker 1 (01:25):
Stop, yeah, because even if you die, they'll still
use your vote.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
Or you may still get social security.
We're not really sure.
So, anyway, just quit it.
Just quit it.
Nobody deserves that kind ofattention or energy.
But what I have noticed isthere are a lot of people who
are acting out and there are alot of things that we observe,
and whether it's somebody who'slosing their cool in a
(01:56):
restaurant or at a retailestablishment, or if it is
something that's going down likeyou see a theft, you see
somebody being abused, you seesomething going on and you go,
wow, you know, that's just deadwrong right there.
The question is, and our topicfor today is when do you get
(02:18):
involved?
When would you get involved?
And so I kind of want to talkabout that today, because back
in my younger days I'll behonest with you I had a Back
when the dinosaurs roamed,that's right.
Stop it Back in the day when Iwas younger I'll be honest I had
(02:40):
a lot of energy and I had a lotof negative energy and for some
reason, when you're younger,you feel like you need to fight
about everything, and I thinkpeople have misinterpreted when
we say stay strong, be strong,have a voice.
You know you can stay strong,be strong, protect yourself,
(03:01):
have your own boundaries andhave a voice without being an
asshole, Right?
And so I think that it kind ofgave everybody a green light to
just act however they wanted to,and it's okay.
That's my truth, that's who Iam.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
I'm protecting.
No, my favorite is the oh, Ihave the First Amendment right
to free speech and it's like,yeah, you do have that First
Amendment right, but you don't.
You're not like once you saysomething, you're not immune to
the consequences.
Exactly you know what happensdepending on what you say.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Exactly, and I think that you know, for me personally
, when I was younger, obviouslyI was much bolder.
That's hard to believe, isn'tit?
Because I pretty much sayanything I want to say.
But with that said, you know, Ireally wasn't that interested
(04:00):
in people's feelings or how,what the outcome was, because I
felt like I had a right.
I had a right to say it and Ihad a right to do the things
that I wanted to do.
And let the chips fall wherethey may.
And the fact of the matter is,is folks being strong, being a
strong, independent person,whether you're male or female,
(04:22):
being a strong, strong person,having your own ideas, having
your independence, having youknow, the tenacity to stand up
to what's right and wrong orwhat's wrong, for that matter,
you know, doesn't mean that youget to be vulgar, it doesn't
mean that you get to be mean, itdoesn't mean that you get to
(04:42):
intervene at any given time.
And so, again, my question iswhen do you get involved?
When would you get involved?
So we've talked about thisbefore.
You know, back in my time, thereused to be a saying that said
you know, it takes a village toraise a child, and what that
(05:03):
meant was.
We were all looking out foreach other and the parents were
looking out for each other'skids, and if we got in trouble
by somebody at the school, ourparents didn't go defend us.
They didn't go defend ourbehavior.
We got our butts whooped and wehad to respect those in
(05:28):
authority.
And you know people go well, wedon't have to respect everybody
in authority.
Yeah, you kind of have torespect everybody for that
matter.
And, um, you know, I've heardpeople also say you know you
have to earn respect.
Well, as a human being, I thinkeverybody deserves respect as a
human being.
(05:48):
Now, once you get past being ahuman being, you know if you're
nice to me, I'll be nice to you.
You be rude to me doesn't meanI'm going to be rude back, and I
think that's kind of where oursociety is today.
So I really want to talk aboutif you walk into a restaurant
and you sit down loud andobnoxious or really being
(06:11):
downright rude to the waitress,or let's say that the waitress
(06:36):
was being downright rude to acustomer, would you feel like
you needed to get involved,bobby?
What do you think?
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Well, a few points before I answer that.
You know, one thing is it'sgood to have a voice and it's
good to stand your ground andstuff like that.
But let's be honest, somepeople just use that as an
excuse to be an asshole and say,well, I have the right to have
it, okay.
Well, no, you're just anasshole.
So let's just get that out ofthe way right now.
(07:05):
You know, and we do have thatbystander effect is what it's
called, and I think a lot of usdo fall prey to that, because
not only is it, you know, we'retaught to mind our own business,
things like that, but it, youknow, today's day, day and age,
it can be dangerous to step inthat's exactly right, life
(07:29):
threatening.
Life threatening, uh, to stepbetween somebody, because I and
I'm gonna say you got a bunch ofpussies out here carrying guns
that are gonna rip it out at anylittle thing, yeah, and you
know they could just gofisticuffs and be over it.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
Right.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
But you know, when it comes down to it, I would
definitely assess the situationIf I had.
You know, when my kids weresmall.
That would be something I wouldthink about protecting my kids,
things like that.
But I'm not one to keep mymouth shut, especially in public
, if I see someone who you knowis being rude, disrespectful
(08:07):
things like that.
Because see, a lot of peopleare like, well, take the high
road and kill them with kindness.
No, baby, you go low, I take itstraight to hell because you're
going to be rude to somebody youdon't have no idea of what you
have just opened up in me,because I don't care.
I don't know you from, you knowfrom Adam, and I really don't
(08:30):
care what you think, and I'm notgoing to stand by and let
someone verbally or physicallyattack someone else just because
they think they have the rightto.
And you know that's where weget the Karen's and things like
that.
Oh, you're being a Karen.
Yeah, I will step in, Iabsolutely will, and I'm not
saying that I'll physically stepin their face, but you're going
(08:52):
to hear my mouth, but do youthink that's going overboard?
Speaker 2 (08:55):
Do you think that's where some of this you know?
I guess, as I see peopleyelling at each other, it's like
just spewing so much venom andhatred.
And you know, like I said backin the day I I was probably more
vocal and I was more willing torun my mouth.
People ask me if I exercise.
Well, I run my mouth a lot.
(09:16):
Does that count?
I run away from my problems Irun away from my problems, um,
but you know, I used to go toevery fight I was invited to and
as you get older and wiser, Ithink that for me anyway and I'm
only giving my perspective youknow, I look around and I go do
(09:36):
I have a dog in this fight?
You know, if I have a dog inthe fight, then yeah, I'll
probably get involved.
But I've toned it down a lotbecause I I'll be honest with
you.
I think that you can, you candeescalate people pretty easily.
And you know, I've been in somesituations here recently that
(09:56):
I've had people yelling at meand I just, you know, I've
looked at them and I've said,listen, I'm not talking to you
disrespectfully, please don'ttalk to me that way.
And you know, let's just have aregular conversation and and
let's just talk about what theissue is.
And I think that we sometimeslook at people's behavior more
(10:20):
so than we look at what theirtopic matter is.
Do you know what I mean by that?
Like if you're mad aboutsomething and you come in and
you're all enraged and you'resaying, hey, somebody hit my car
and you're just being an assabout it.
Sometimes we have to look pastthat and say okay, I need you to
(10:41):
calm down.
And of course, telling somebodyto calm down is, like you know,
kicking a wet chicken, right.
But um, I think that, uh, youknow, we have to kind of look at
what the topic is.
What is it they're reallytrying to say?
And when you kids were growingup I used to say that too.
I used to say you know how theysay, it is really not as
(11:03):
important to me as what they'resaying.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Well, and I mean that's also situational you know
you're talking about somebodywho's like, let's say, you're in
a restaurant and somebody isgoing off on the waitress and
you know being derogatory, usingracial slurs, things like that,
just out of nowhere, like theyhave no right, no reason, no
meaning Not that anybody has aright or a reason to do that.
(11:40):
But there's no basis for this,other than you know they just
want to be an asshole to thisperson that they think is below
them.
Now, yeah, you can come at thatperson and be soft and kind and
things.
Normally.
That doesn't work Normally thatdoesn't work.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
I wouldn't say normally doesn't.
I've been pretty successfulwith it.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
I don't know, with strangers People I know, yeah, I
can usually talk them down orsay, hey, wait a second.
You know your tone of voice iscompletely overshadowing what
you're trying to say, type ofthing.
But you know, when it comes tostrangers, I think that we need
to grab their attention awayfrom the person that they are
(12:13):
directing it at, because I'lltake it like, you know, I'll
look right at him and go, Ooh,excuse me, I'm going to step in
this Now.
This person has nothing to dowith it.
You direct your anger at mebecause I got, I got, I, I
you're dead inside.
Speaker 2 (12:27):
Okay, well, yeah, I'm going to clear my schedule
because I have time today.
You're going to clear yourschedule.
Speaker 1 (12:40):
Like I just wrote you in yeah, Well, and I get it.
Speaker 2 (12:44):
I mean I see both sides.
I mean there are times when Ihave you know, there are times
when I just really want to ripsomebody's head off, right.
And so I want to get back to myoriginal question.
You go into an establishmentlet's say it's a restaurant and
somebody is, let's say thatthey're really just being
(13:04):
terribly, terribly rude to thewaitress, and you kind of notice
the waitress isn't being a jerkand she's doing the best she
can.
And maybe it's her first day.
And I've always said I don'tknow everybody's story.
I don't know what happened toher before she came here, I
don't know if her kid is sick, Idon't know if her dog just died
(13:28):
, I don't know if she's fourmonths behind on her rent, I
don't know.
And so somebody is just being areally jerk, bad jerk.
To this waitress you would saysomething, absolutely.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
Absolutely, and I would make sure that everybody
heard it too, because I willshame that person one way or the
other for how they're acting,because there's no reason for it
.
You need you know.
You don't need to be like that.
Speaker 2 (13:59):
You don't need to be like that.
Yeah, so you're gonna come backat them with the same energy
that they're giving her oh,absolutely isn't that kind of
dangerous.
Speaker 1 (14:09):
I mean, that seems dangerous to me well, I mean it
can be, but, like I said, youknow, everybody wants to be like
, oh, you need to take the highroad.
No, baby, my road is low.
And like I will take it,because a lot of people who are
at that point already kind ofneed that shock value of someone
(14:29):
coming at them and going, youknow, that same energy at them
and then slowly bring it down,if it's possible, you know, and
if it's not possible, whereyou're able to bring it down to,
you know, a calmer place, thenI mean, like I said, I got all
day.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
Yeah, yeah, I think you know you really have to
assess and you know, I think thereason some people just really
don't want to get involved ordon't want to say anything is
because they're scared.
You mentioned that earlier.
You don't know when somebody isgoing to pull a gun, because
they're, you know, just hellbent, for you know being an
idiot that day.
(15:08):
But well, let's take it a stepfurther then.
What if you saw somebody andI'm, I'm always for the underdog
right.
So if I see an old person or akid being brutalized, I'm I'm
(15:28):
all over it I'm all over it.
What?
What are you gonna say?
We were, we were brutalized.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
Mom, wait a minute yeah, I, I, yeah, I'm kind of
50-50 on that.
Now, if it's like a young kid,you know, type of thing and
they're being abused, or like aI can't even say a really old
person, because I have heardsome of the stuff come out of
these old people's mouths andI'm like you never got hit in
the face did you?
Because otherwise you would notbe saying things like that to
(15:56):
get you know, to start a fight,thinking that just because
you're old, I'm not going to hityou, type of thing.
Speaker 2 (16:02):
So I remember a news story where a and they showed
the video because there was athere was a camera on the
building where a guy came up andhe was going to try to take the
vehicle away from this old manand the old man he all he was
doing was walking up and to takethe vehicle away from this old
man and the old man he all hewas doing was walking up and
getting into his vehicle and theguy started just punching him
(16:23):
in the face, just beating him,beating him, beating him, and
the old man hung on to the doorand he hung on to the car.
Come to find out he was anex-marine, but he was an old guy
, right.
So you lose your.
You lose, you know, your muscletone and all that stuff as we
get older, and he just wasn't asstrong, but he hung tough and
(16:44):
what was really the saddest partof that was there were people
in the background just watchingit, yeah, and I thought, man,
that wouldn't be me.
I can't do.
Do that, I can't do it.
No, a child that, let's say, isyour youngest daughter's age, is
, you know, getting slappedaround or you know, just
(17:09):
something bad.
I mean, some kids deserve to beslapped around.
Let's say that it's a child.
That's your youngest daughter'sage, and okay, so like nine
yeah.
So you see someone and and youknow some kids don't get me
wrong, I have no problem withsomebody disciplining their kid
right.
(17:29):
I, you kids got spanked.
I got spanked, didn't kill us.
I know, bobby, dead silenceright there.
Um, let's say that you're, yousee this and they're really
being bad.
I mean it's, it's really bad.
(17:49):
Would you jump in?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
Would you say something bad?
Speaker 2 (17:53):
No, no, no.
Parent is really really, orwhoever the adult is, is really
really being horrible to thiskid.
Would you say something?
Absolutely okay, and I would,absolutely, I would too.
I, I would, I would probablysay something.
So let me take it a stepfurther.
You are in a convenience store,gas station, and you watch
(18:19):
someone stick stuff in theircoat pockets what is it?
Speaker 1 (18:26):
I don't know what it is.
Well, because I mean they'rehonest to god, like if I see you
stealing like actual food orbaby formula or diapers.
I didn't see nothing.
Okay, I'm sorry, I didn't seenothing, gosh seriously.
But if it's like alcohol orcigarettes or something, yeah,
I'll rat your ass out we have atotally different view of this.
Speaker 2 (18:52):
Okay, so if I see someone who is stealing baby
formula or something that youknow, diapers or something like
that and they're not going toshove diapers into their pocket,
right, but it's something thatyou go oh man, they probably
need that, and it looks likethey need that I'm walking up to
the clerk and I'm gonna say,listen, I'll pay for that and so
(19:14):
and I've done that numeroustimes I've paid for their stuff.
Speaker 1 (19:17):
Well, I would say, if they get caught by, like loss
prevention, I would be willingto step in if I'm able to and
say, hey, you know, I'll pay forit, let him go, type of thing.
Otherwise I didn't see nothing.
I didn't see nothing.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
Oh, my goodness, Seriously, seriously, seriously,
seriously.
See, if somebody picked up apack of smokes, or they, you
know, shoved a turkey betweentheir legs and and we're walking
out under you know, it's undertheir dress, and uh, I'm saying
something.
Speaker 1 (19:54):
I'm saying it's not my job.
It's not my job really.
You know what I mean.
Like it's not my job.
Now if, if they were likestealing like electronics or
something like, yeah, I might belike, hey, you guys want to get
on that, but I'd just walk awayLike that's not my job, bobby
but you understand that thereason a lot of stores close is
because of theft.
Speaker 2 (20:14):
And people get all upset because these stores are
closing and they say, oh, it'sbecause it's you know they're
racist and it.
Oh, it's because it's you knowthey're racist and it's because
it's a, you know, a blackneighborhood or it's a Hispanic
neighborhood or something likethat.
And yet it isn't because ofthat, it's because of the theft.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
Look, if you're stealing food or baby
necessities.
I'm blind in one eye and I onlysee 50% out of the other eye.
I can't see nothing.
But if it's anything else, ifit's anything like electronics,
alcohol, tobacco, things likethat, I'd be like you know, I'd
be like motion and be like, hey,you know, you might want to
(20:53):
check them, type of thing.
But no, I mean honestly, I, andI'm going to be honest.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
There's times that I have been in the position where
I have had to do someunscrupulous things in order to
survive.
Speaker 1 (21:11):
Now, it wasn't like I was stealing alcohol and stuff
like that, but it was things toliterally survive.
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
And yeah, I didn't see shit, are you serious?
Oh my gosh, I didn't see shit.
Are you serious?
Because if it was for the kidsor something, all you'd have had
to do is call and ask for itand you would have gotten it.
Don't even, don't even.
Why would you have stolen it?
You had family members, theformula's expensive.
What I know but you're theformula's expensive.
Who are you kidding?
Speaker 1 (21:42):
I would have paid for it, or your dad would have paid
for it.
What are you kidding me?
Well, you gotta remember.
You gotta remember back in thetime that Corey was an infant,
he was on that specializedformula.
It was $60 a, can we?
Weren't exactly in the greatestof place relationship wise you
could have called your dad.
Speaker 2 (21:57):
He would have given it to you.
You could have called me anyway.
Speaker 1 (22:02):
Hey, okay well let's get past that.
Speaker 2 (22:05):
Let's get past that, because you know I'm going to
hammer you on that.
Speaker 1 (22:09):
I mean like if I, if I saw, you know, like an 80 year
old woman stealing packs oflunch meat and a loaf of bread,
I didn't see nothing.
Okay, I did not see a damnthing, Sorry.
Speaker 2 (22:22):
See, I, I, I've seen that before and I I remember
this old guy.
Do you remember lynn'ssupermarket in uh yeah, in des
moines?
So yeah, they got the besthaunted house yeah, they do, or
they think they still do, Idon't know um, but anyway, this
old boy was in front of me and Iremember him putting some stuff
(22:42):
up on the belt and he leanedover and his jacket showed that
he had those breakfast sausagesin his back pocket.
What the hell was that?
Speaker 1 (22:59):
I know I'd have been like, sir, is that a sausage in
your pocket, or are we gonnahave an issue here?
Speaker 2 (23:06):
no, this was like you know.
This was back when you hadheard that.
You know, older people wereeating cat food and stuff
because they couldn't afford itand I remember the clerk seeing
it, because it's like it's along package, it's not like
you're gonna you know you're not, you're gonna miss it.
And so I remember him leaningover and she, she saw it and I
(23:28):
looked at her and I just, youknow, motioned, hey, I'll pay
for that.
And so it was no big deal.
But I, yeah, I just you know,that kind of stuff that that
makes me that pulls on myheartstrings, other stuff I'm
kind of like, hey, you need topay for that crap.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
You know, that's why stores go out of business in
your area like, let's say we'rein a walmart and I see a
teenager like grab an xbox andrun for that front door, I might
trip him.
Whoops, I helped.
Okay, you don't need that xbox,okay, sorry oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Well, I would be interested in what the what our
listeners have to say about it,because you and I obviously
don't agree.
We're on two different ends ofthe spectrum on this one for
sure, and it makes me sad now toknow that you know you didn't
reach out when you needed helpwith the kids.
I mean, I thought you you did,and so you know.
(24:30):
Sorry I wasn't there for you.
Bobby, we're not gonna boohooabout that now because we're
fine, uh, but anyway, I thinkthat's probably as far as we're
going to go today, unless youwant to add something, bob.
Speaker 1 (24:49):
Well, here's a scenario, so let's do this one
real quick.
Let's say you see somebodythat's broken down on the side
of the road.
Yeah, you can't see who theperson is.
If it's man, woman, black,white, old, young, do you pull
over?
Speaker 2 (25:05):
Yeah, I do all the time.
Dr Domain and I, we pull overall the time.
Speaker 1 (25:11):
Well, that's you together.
I'm talking by yourself.
Do you pull over?
Speaker 2 (25:16):
You know, that's a tough one because I have
unfortunately I have.
It's a tough one because I have, unfortunately I have.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
And there's and there's instances, you know,
even in this last January andthe year before, where these
off-duty officers even havepulled over to help a motorist
and one guy he pulls over tohelp a motorist that they hit a
deer.
Well, they didn't get cellreception because it's in the
middle of but fuck, egypt outhere where we don't get cell
(25:46):
reception anywhere.
And they walked up to thenearest house.
He goes let's walk up to thishouse and see if there's a
landline we can use, becausethere's no cell reception.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
And the homeowner shot him wow, yeah, I mean those
kind of stories.
You know, there are storieswhere you pull over and they get
shot.
Speaker 1 (26:08):
Trying to help this motorist, yeah, or what do you
do?
Speaker 2 (26:12):
or the motorist something happens to them
because somebody pulls over.
Right, you know, somebody pullsover and you think they're
going to help you and they endup murdering you.
And, uh, you know, people sayI'm I'm kind of negative on this
.
I don't believe that I am, butI do believe there are a lot of
bad people out there.
I hear people all the time go.
There's so many good people outthere, you know, just cause you
(26:33):
do a good deed doesn't make youa good person.
I apologize, but it does not.
You can do a good deeds.
It doesn't make you a goodperson.
Speaker 1 (26:42):
That's like saying go to church makes me a good
person, right?
No, it doesn't.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
It doesn't, and so you know I do believe there are
a lot of bad people out therethat if you weren't being
watched or there wasn't sometype of rule or you weren't
required to do it for some otherreason, they sure as hell
wouldn't be good people or theywouldn't be doing good things.
So, yeah, if you're scared whenyou get broken down on the side
(27:13):
of the road that you're goingto get raped or murdered by
somebody on the side of the road, there's too many bad people
out there.
But I guess I would like toknow from our listeners, you
know, what do they think?
And you know, would you getinvolved?
And I understand the fearfactor, but, gosh, folks, I
(27:35):
think we still have to try ourbest to do the best we can for
each other.
Don we I think so yeah so,anyway, you and I didn't agree
this time, bobby, and that'sokay, but we appreciate
everybody joining us here atrabbit run studio.
Be sure to follow us.
(27:55):
We look forward to spendingtime with you guys every single
week.
Please like us and, um, youknow, if you have some positive
feedback for us or you have atopic you want us to talk about,
please, please, please, drop usa short email at boomer and gen
x or at gmailcom.
If you have some hate mail, youknow we've talked about this
(28:15):
before.
We're not interested.
We'll take your criticism.
We, we're.
We're tough skinned.
Bobby's dead inside.
I got tough skin, it don'tmatter.
Um, so, uh, you know, if you'vegot some criticism or something
that you want us to dodifferently, hey, talk to us
about it.
Until next week, I'm jane burtand I'm bobby joy and you're
(28:38):
stuck with us.
Peace out later.
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