June 16, 2025 • 39 mins
What happens when parents face the unexpected challenge of raising a child with different abilities? While some choose to run, others discover the most beautiful journey imaginable—one filled with unconditional love and unexpected lessons.
In this raw and honest conversation, Victoria and Michael tackle the painful reality of abandonment in families with medically complex children. Victoria doesn't mince words about fathers who leave when faced with a child's medical diagnosis: "You're beyond a coward, you're beyond a piece of shit for leaving that mother, your newborn baby, just because you don't want to deal with the challenges." Having experienced life with a daughter who required a tracheostomy, Victoria shares how she didn't hear her child's voice until she was two and a half years old—yet these moments became all the more precious because "we don't take one minute for granted."
The conversation takes a deeply personal turn when Victoria opens up about her own physical challenges, including significant hearing loss in both ears and adapting to life with one arm. Her perspective is powerful: "If anybody has the right to be absolutely bitter and nasty, I would hands down say me," yet she chooses resilience instead. From tying shoes to washing her waist-length hair one-handed, Victoria demonstrates how limitations can lead to innovation rather than defeat.
Between reflections on a joyful Father's Day celebration and exciting professional news about Victoria's upcoming speaking engagement for Roku television, the hosts share their passion for making trauma recovery resources accessible to everyone. Their academy offers affordable courses with a scholarship program that allows those in need to access healing resources for just $5—"not even the cost of a Starbucks coffee."
Every smile tells a story, and sometimes the most beautiful stories emerge from our greatest challenges. Join us in celebrating the courage of those who stay, adapt, and discover unconditional love against all odds.
Want to help someone access healing resources? Visit acontagioussmile.com to learn how you can contribute to our scholarship program and make a difference in someone's healing journey today.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Uh-oh, is it on now?
Howdy y'all.
Welcome to another episode ofTake a Smile, unstoppable with
the lovely and always sexyVictoria Depends who you ask.
And me, michael Redneck,husband.
Let's go ahead and give a bighappy Father's Day to all us
(00:24):
fathers out there.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
And the moms who play both roles, because I did that
for a long time.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Okay, yes, and the moms who play dads Speaking of
that.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
So you know one thing that gets my goat yeah, I'm
just going to enjoy my sweet andsour chicken a la rice.
Go ahead.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Is these piece of shit men out there that
abandoned, leave this old runwaytheir cowardly self tail,
between the legs after they aretold or come to realize that
their child has certainchallenges.
(01:04):
Their baby, their infant Idon't know the correct words.
You're beyond a coward, you'rebeyond a piece of shit for
leaving that mother, yournewborn baby, just because you
don't want to deal with thechallenges that the medical
appointments oh, this is goingto inconvenience your life
(01:28):
Preach.
So F you, you know, you know,oh, it pisses me off.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Okay.
So in the NICU the divorce rateis obscene and it's normally.
Normally, 99% of the time it isthe man who leaves the
relationship, whether or notthey don't want involvement
(02:02):
because one reason or another.
They don't want involvementbecause one reason or another.
They don't want to say thattheir child has.
Whatever the situation may be,do you know what?
I've had the pleasure of workingwith the most amazing kiddos.
None of them are disabled, noneof them are, you know,
(02:22):
medically incompetent.
They just learn at a differentpace.
They learn in a different way.
They go down a differentjourney and you know what?
Those journeys are morebeautiful because we don't have
those assholes taking up theview.
You know what I mean.
And we don't take, excuse me,we don't take one minute for
granted.
(02:42):
I don't take a laugh forgranted.
I didn't hear our daughter.
She hiccuped once prior to theplacement of the tracheostomy,
but other than that I didn'teven get to hear her until she
was two and a half years old.
I didn't get the coups andcause and all that stuff.
And then we've had people inour family when she had her
(03:06):
trach placed and she had it fora couple of years.
That would say something likedon't say a word to your lawyer,
folks thinking it was comical.
It's not comical.
And then, after decannulation,the same individual would make
some stupid comment Like I likedit better when you weren't able
to talk.
I mean individual would makesome stupid comment like I liked
(03:27):
it better when you weren't ableto talk.
I mean people are just beyondignorant and I don't want to say
it's ignorant because theycognitively know what they're
saying.
They, they know.
I mean I don't want to givethem that credit, but they do.
They, they think they're beingfunny, but they it's like how do
I make an excuse for you beinga downright prick?
You know how did that happen?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
So this is by no means taken away from us dads,
us fathers, stepfathers, adoptedfathers.
You know your father.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Grandfathers.
My grandfather was the best.
I mean the best.
I'm stirring up.
Best, I mean the best.
You couldn't have gotten better.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
It's 11.20pm when we are right now and we're eating
chicken and rice as a littlemidnight snack.
But yeah, thank you to all ofyou fathers.
You can take up the mantle andtake care of that child, who may
not be yours biologically, butif you've adopted them, you've
(04:32):
included them into your family,your circle.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
But two pugs in a push doesn't give you the right
to be an ass.
No, I mean seriously, it reallydoesn't.
I mean you think about it.
Just because you lay downdoesn't mean you get to.
There's you another littleconnect that you don't get to.
You know, dump and run.
I mean I don't know how else tosay it.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
How else do you say but I had a great Father's Day.
I woke up and Well, I deserveit.
We had dad daughter movie nightso like three in the morning.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
I deserve it which dog is under my leg, of course
exactly that's why I have thebest kid your favorite.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
She has you wrapped she actually cooked me breakfast
she made him an omelet?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
did she give you bananas with it?
No buttered raisin bread toastoh, so she didn't share her
lemon blueberry.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
She has lemon blueberry bread and she shares
it with me, and we were downthere topping off chocolate cake
a while ago, so I had a goodFather's Day.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You got so many gifts .
Which one was your favorite?
My knife.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
Which, oh gosh, I got a knife.
I got a great little pocketknife, another one.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Flashlight.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
One of 400.
Flashlight I got a metaldetector Right.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Who gets a metal?
Speaker 1 (06:12):
detector on Father's Day.
That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
What about, oh we?
Speaker 1 (06:15):
got a shooting A laser.
What was it called A laser guntraining shooting?
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Right, you're dry, firing Right.
And then your wife got you anoffice chair and a new desk that
I still have to put together.
Well, it's not hard to put aleather chair together.
You're still young and dag-dabit.
Every time I had a gift for himsomewhere, I'm like no, no, no,
no, no.
We don't hide anything fromeach other ever.
(06:46):
And he's like woman, let me getsomething out of your purse.
I'm like no, because that'slike the one place I had left to
hide something.
I mean, he was finding stufftwo weeks before Father's Day.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Speaking of.
We don't hide anything fromeach other.
Someone just found that outtonight after a conversation,
that my loyalty is to my wifeabove all others.
Wait, say that again.
This is my wife, this is mysoulmate, this is my partner.
We do everything together.
(07:20):
There are no secrets, there areno skeletons in either closet.
So you know.
To the guy out there can I sayguy Sure, who thunk, who thunk
that I would be loyal to him?
Forget it, pal.
Forget about it.
Yeah, forget about it.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
That was kind of sexy , you don't even come close.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
No, they're going to take you three lifetimes.
No, he couldn't even do it then.
No, anyway.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
So congratulations, we were just awarded an amazing
award.
So congratulations to AContagious Smile my husband.
Talk about all the awards andstuff.
I'm too humble, I don't do thatstuff.
No, I don't do it.
We all know you can chat withstuff in your mouth.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Easy greasy.
So, I don't know all the awardsmy wife has.
She just recently got abouteight awards from different
magazines, different companies.
I know she's getting featuredin the New York Times.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
International Business Journal Insider Weekly
Women's.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Week.
Is it New York Times?
No, it's just Time Magazine.
No, it's not Time.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
Magazine.
It's some New York.
I haven't gotten it yet.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
See, I can't even keep up with them.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
They got Insider Weekly.
Insider Weekly Featured us forBest Of transformative trauma
advocate, which was awesome, andthen Women's Weekly and Women's
Week and a bunch of newsstations affiliate of ABC did
(09:12):
articles on us.
I do not have all theinformation yet.
I will get it out there when Ido.
I have been asked to be one of100 women who will be doing
about a 12-minute live speech,if you will, and it's going to
be featured on Roku television.
(09:34):
It's going to be featuredFacebook, instagram, tiktok,
linkedin, a couple of othermajor stations and then, of
course, we're having it recordedso that we can put it out here
for anybody who might miss it.
I'll have more details of thathere this week.
(09:55):
That's an incredible honor.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
I want to give a thank you to Ray Lewis, who
recently sent in a cameo aboutpromoting our academies that we
have up and running.
So, thank you if y'all haven'tseen him.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
He's on our Facebook.
He's everywhere and now we haveour own channel, facebook
Academy channel.
I have one for authoring stuffthat I've done, and then a
contagious small now has achannel and it's starting to
like just go crazy, likeeverything is just coming to the
(10:35):
forefront.
Finally, it's been a long timein the making.
I'm I hate how long it hastaken because I'm doing the job
of like 30 people and I'm doingit one-handed and it takes a
very long time and I ammeticulous about things when it
comes to the placement ofeverything and make sure it
(10:56):
looks right and it's fun andit's great and it has great, you
know information.
So it does take a little bitlonger than it would joey bag of
donuts, um, but it's going tobe super, super fun and we're
partnering with ripple retreat,my dear friend and brother, jj,
who is to Ripple Retreat andcheck him out.
(11:18):
He is phenomenal.
What a story he has.
He has such a huge heart.
I had him on as a guest on hisbirthday and he was celebrating
many years of sobriety.
His story will pull at yourheartstrings.
His story will pull at yourheartstrings.
He is such a light Like.
(11:39):
He served our country withpride and honor and now he is
paying it forward with a rippleretreat, which is this is
phenomenal.
He has a facility where peoplewho are recovering and are in
some type of recovery can go,and on the weekends he's doing
(12:01):
where you could have weddingsand stuff, but it's alcohol-free
weddings.
So like, if you have drunkuncle joe, he can't bring
alcohol, um, and there's noalcohol here, so he can't come
out here and ruin your event orwhatever.
And JJ's just a stellarstand-up.
Jj's awesome Right guy andy'all need to check him out and
(12:26):
if y'all can, you know, supporthim in any way, please do so,
because it's amazing.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
We had another special guest come on our show
or not our show, but drop bytoday and I want to shout out to
DJ Blacks.
He came to spend a couple hourswith us.
As y'all can probably hear, wehave some audio quality that we
need to address.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Which is coming and will be changed by next week,
right?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
So fair with us on this audio quality.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I know it probably sucks right now, but, in all
fairness, we have been fundingall of this ourselves.
It is so outright expensive,and even paying, like our
academy, is so under cost wiselike it's I'm not under cost,
but undervalued in regards tothe courses are so much cheaper
(13:16):
than the value of them, becausewe want it to be affordable for
everybody, and we have many,many courses that are free.
However, we still have to payfor the platforms and all the
other software and everythingelse that we do on a daily basis
, and so we're just trying tobreak even.
We're not trying to do a getrich thing by any means.
(13:37):
Break even.
We're not trying to do a getrich thing by any means.
So our audio has taken a turnfor the worst because our
equipment is way overused and Iam also in the.
The desire and need of a newcomputer.
My one computer that we doeverything on hates me, um,
because if you open it right now, I think there's like 52 tabs
(13:59):
open and we're runningeverything on it, and it's the
only thing we could afford.
And so we've had this computerfor many, many, many years and I
need to upgrade, but it's justnot financially feasible for us
at this point in time, so we'rehaving to wait on that, but we
(14:20):
are upgrading our audioequipment.
It will be this week, so thenext podcast will be amazing and
you guys will be like, wow,they have great content and they
sound good.
So you'll be able to hear thedifference in who Michael and
who Victoria is.
You'll know the redneck andyou'll hear the redhead.
So that's in the works as wellis.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
You'll know the redneck and you'll hear the
redhead.
So that's in the works as well.
Welcome to all the newsubscribers in our academy.
Thank y'all.
We've had some positive reviews, some feedback from those that
have taken several of thecourses.
The kiddos absolutely love it.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
And we've had people buying the scholarships.
So we've had in the last week Ithink, we've had right now up
to eight scholarships purchasedand they're only $5 a piece.
You can purchase higher volumeand higher price scholarships,
which means you'll be able topay it forward.
(15:17):
You could do it in honor ofsomebody you know.
One in four, statistically, ofvictims are women and one in
four women are in some type oftraumatic abusive relationship
in their lifetime.
So think about it you have amom, you have a sister, you have
a wife and you have a daughter,and one of those four, god
(15:39):
forbid, could be a victim ofabuse.
And if they couldn't afford it,then we take care of it.
But then what we do is we takethat money that's sitting there
in the scholarship fund and weuse that, and so we've had eight
different scholarshipspurchased this week alone.
We would like to try for 10 thenext week and keep going every
(16:02):
week.
We will never turn anyone away,and it's not even the cost of a
Starbucks.
Like to go to McDonald's andget like a I don't know.
A Happy Meal is more than a $5cup of coffee.
Happy meal is more than a $5cup of coffee, and to know that
(16:24):
you're doing that and paying itforward makes you feel so good
inside because you're helpingsomeone.
And you know what, one day youmight be on top of the world and
the next day you might not beand you have no idea it's coming
, and I'm here to tell you.
I walked that by myself andthat's why we do what we do.
I never want anyone else tohave to do that, because you
don't know when it's coming.
I, I'm here to tell you.
I walked that by myself andthat's why we do what we do.
I never want anyone else tohave to do that Because you
don't know when it's coming.
I had a six-figure career acouple decades ago and little
(16:46):
did I know that I would be, youknow, beyond broke and poor
shortly thereafter.
But you do what you need to dofor your family.
If you're not a deadbeat, posum and you stand up and do
what's right, treat others theway you want to be treated and
you know what.
(17:07):
To hell with everybody else.
Seriously, you know, I look atit like it's a rite of passage
because I actually was talkingwith that individual my husband
was referencing earlier and it'slike you know, here's the thing
if you look at a family tree,you might have bloodline where
you have okay, there's somebranches here or whatever but
(17:28):
even a family tree has some deadlimbs right, and so you think
about that and it's like youcan't pick your family.
You can pick your ass, you canpick your nose, but you can't
pick your family, and that'sthat's really sad.
That's really sad because theyshould be there unconditionally,
(17:49):
no matter what, when you needthem.
But when they need you, youbetter believe they're going to
be front and center, want help,and the question is do you give
it to them?
Do you help them, in spite ofthe hurt, pain and trauma they
caused you?
Because if you don't, are youjust like them or do you like?
(18:13):
We have a saying in our home wewant no drama, drama and we
have a quaint, quiet,comfortable home and we don't
let the crap in, we don't letthe people trying to come in and
start crap.
(18:33):
And you build a strongfoundation and you're as strong
as your weakest link.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
And so you keep that weakest link at bay and you keep
everybody else.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
He's laughing at me, you know you keep everybody else
at bay.
Um, because you want a happyenvironment, you want a happy
home, and that's you know.
I'll confess something to youright now which totally kind of
left you all.
That's not surprising for me,but you know we found out that
the hearing in my right ear,which is only like 8%.
I'm 92% deaf in my right earfrom the trauma of my abuse.
(19:14):
I haven't worn my hearing aidsin a while because I can't, and
my otolaryngologist understoodthat.
We talked about it this pastweek and I'm 80 something
percent deaf in the left ear.
So I rely on my hearing aids,which I can't wear.
And I read people's lips butlike if we're in here recording
that it's Michael and I I canhear him because it's only him.
(19:36):
If Faith was in here and theywere both talking, it sounds
like.
And if the TV is on, forget it,I can't distinguish what's what
.
So my surgeon, after dozens ofsurgeries, basically told me
that we need to do somethingcalled a shutdown or a stitch
(19:56):
down or whatever it is, whereit's like a fine thing painting
on a wall, where you look at itand you're like, oh, that's nice
, but it absolutely has nofunction to it, and so that
would be kind of what they wantto do now.
And then there's a possibilityof a cochlear implant and I'm
like, oh great, something elseto plug up in me every day,
right, like I need a usb,whatever you call those things,
(20:19):
hub, and we need one that haslike 15 plugs to be able to do
everything, because I am like,seriously, I don't need to take
a shower, I need a wd-40, youknow wash, because that's
basically what it is, and Iliterally have more metal in me,
I think, than working humanparts.
And what scares me and I'venoticed it slightly, and now I'm
(20:43):
becoming self-conscious aboutit.
This is a long way around sayingwhat I was going to confess is
I was told that as thisprogresses, my speech changes
and like, if you ever listen toMarlee Matlin, right, like
people are like who is that?
First of all, she's completely,100% deaf.
(21:03):
She was on Dancing with theStars and she paid attention to
the rhythmic sound on the floor,right, and her partner, who I
don't remember who it was, gaveher pointers, like where he
would make a sign or somethingto remind her where she was in
sequence of her dance.
But if you listen to her talkfirst of all, I think she's an
(21:24):
amazing human being and if youlisten to her talk, you can tell
that her speech is muchdifferent because she doesn't
hear how to articulate the wordscorrectly, so her speech is
different.
And so when you're losing yourhearing and you don't hear it
all the time it's you'restarting to make different
pronunciations of words, and Iknow, know that's happening.
(21:45):
I've heard it on some words andI know that it's going to be
coming more and more, and ourdaughter, faith, thinks that's
awesome because I'll sound likeher a little bit.
But it scares me.
She does, she is perfect.
But it scares me because I'm soused to being articulate and
(22:06):
doing speaking engagements andinternational speaking
engagements and, um, to knowthat my, my speech will continue
to, like I don't know,disintegrate into I don't know
what it's it's your family'sgonna be here and to I don't
(22:27):
know what it's it's your family.
Well, and I appreciate that I do.
But I'm a person who speaks tothe public and to know I mean
there are some words that I saythat I hear now are a little
different and I'm sure you wantto, you'll admit that you've
heard it too, and it's quitebothersome because I've always
(22:48):
been this person that has spokenin front of others ever since I
was in high school, in thedebate team right, and so like
for me to.
I know that's shocking I was onthe debate team right, but like
to conversate with someone.
I know that my words are goingto not be as fluid for others
and, you know, if you're bornthat way, faith has such a great
(23:08):
outlook on everything becauseshe'll say I don't know any
different, because that's theonly thing I've ever known.
Well, I've known this and nowit's something else I have to
learn, right?
So when I hear people who arelike pieces of crap and they
don't care when their child,grandchild or whatever is in a
hospital for surgery 5, 10, 50or one their first surgery, you
(23:32):
know, one doesn't make anydifferent than 50 and you can't
be bothered by that.
And then you go throughsomething where it's like you
know and you and that personwants to be a complete jerk
about life.
But then you go throughsomething where it's like you
know and that person wants to bea complete jerk about life.
But then you have someone andI've said this a hundred times
If anybody has the right to beabsolutely bitter and nasty and
(23:53):
just downright gross, I wouldhands down.
No offense, say me, hands down,because if you look at the fact
that I am learning how to livelife all over again, one handed
right, instead of being like, ok, I'm just going to give in and
not care anymore, I will open abottle, I can tie my own shoes,
I do all my own grooming, right?
(24:14):
I mean, yeah, you have to learnhow to do it.
It's just like journaling yourway through a different path
because you have to take it.
You don't have a say in it.
There are times I get sofrustrated and I get clumsy, my
balance is off.
I get that.
And then now it's like is it ajoke, am I going to be equal?
(24:35):
Because my left arm is missingand my right side will no longer
have hearing or soundcapability of any kind.
So does that balance me out,you know?
And then I have this thing inmy back my face is all metal.
I have like 32 pieces of metalin my face.
So I mean it's just like when Igo to a uh anywhere that I have
(24:56):
to go through a metal detector.
I'm like here, pick a card, anycard, and it's all like she has
all these metal bodies andstuff and I've never seen a more
beautiful woman especially whenyour eyes are closed.
But it's tough.
It is tough and then you thinkabout well, why do some people
(25:18):
act the way that they do?
Like I heard that someone elsethat I know unfortunately has a
child that I believe is on thevery high end of the spectrum of
autism See Autism and she yellsat him all the time, and I was
told that he's constantlythreatened Like if you don't
(25:39):
stop acting this way, I'm goingto take away your car, I'm going
to take away the phone, I'mgoing to take away this.
First of all, it's not in hiscontrol, right?
He is on the high end of autismand he can't have loud sounds
and other things you have totake into consideration.
It doesn't mean you can't livelife.
It just means you have to dothings a little differently.
(26:02):
You know like our whole lifehas been revolved around doing
things differently for Faith andmyself, but I wouldn't give up
our journey because we have metthe most incredible people along
the way.
We've learned how to do newthings that nobody else would
ever know shoes one handed, orwash their hair my hair's down
(26:25):
to my waist.
Wash shampoo, condition, brush,comb out your hair, you know,
shave do all the stuff you haveto do and do it one handed right
.
It's not easy.
It's not easy, it's not.
You know the cook cooking andstirring a pot and at the same
(26:45):
time trying to hold the potwhile you're stirring and while
you're holding it, you know, orcarrying a very heavy cooking
dish to the table.
There are things that are quitethe challenge, especially
because I'm weight limited onthat arm, because what a lot of
people also don't know is thatmy shoulder has been replaced in
that arm.
So I go big or go home, right,it's like all or nothing.
(27:06):
So the shoulder's been replaced, I'm missing most of the arm, I
have no hand and I'm weightlimited.
But my prosthetic, my originalprosthetic, weighed more than
the weight I was allowed tocarry and it's like, if anybody
has the right to be nasty,downright hideous, I think it
would be me, and that's not metrying to pat myself on the back
(27:29):
.
My husband will tell you I'm thefurthest from that, but I get
up every day.
Sometimes it's much harder thanothers.
I'll get up with headaches thatliterally make me want to just
stay in bed, but I get up everysingle day and then I think of
these pieces of crap that have achild, a child who did not ask
to come into this world andthey're.
(27:50):
They're in a hospital bed andall they want is love,
unconditional love.
They don't want anything else.
They're not asking about whatkind of car.
They don't care if you have aLexus or a Yugo, right, they
don't know the difference inthem.
They want unconditional loveand acceptance for who they are.
Because you're wanting them toaccept you for being a prick.
(28:10):
But they're laying there and ifyou look down at your own child
and they're laying in a hospitalbed and all they want is your
time and your love and you can'tgive them that.
You don't deserve to have themaround.
You don't deserve.
That child will love youunconditionally, unlike any
other person in your life.
(28:31):
Faith has taught me love in away that you there's this love
and connection and bonding thatwe have and and bonding that we
have and she teaches me newthings every day.
But when you look at people whoare like, oh, I got to go do
(28:52):
this for myself, I got to go dothat for myself, I got to do
this, I got to do that, and theycan't make time for what is
amazing and loving that's rightin front of you, then they're
going to be very old and aloneand miserable, and it might take
(29:13):
10, 20, 50, 60 years, but thatthat's karma.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
You know, you got about a hundred thousand
millennials right now looking upthe word.
What the heck is a Yugo?
That's all you got fromeverything.
I just said Nope, but I wantnow looking up the word.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
What the heck is a yugo?
That's all you got fromeverything.
I just said Nope, but I want tothrow that in there.
A yugo, what's a yugo there?
Speaker 1 (29:32):
Redneck, it's a claw.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
It was a claw.
It is a claw.
Well, we have things out therenow that look like an egg with
wheels, right, those tiny littlethings that look like you have
to.
Yeah, it looks like you don'twind it up to make it go.
To make it.
Oh my gosh, like never, ever,would I ever.
I'd rather.
No, no, I just can't.
(29:54):
Things are too tiny.
It's like a coffin ready to go.
I mean, you can't survive that.
You got hit by a bunny rabbitcrossing the road at the same
time.
That you got hit by a bunnyrabbit crossing the road at the
same time, right, I mean,there's just no way.
And I want to take a moment andshout out to the law enforcement
officers that stood fast for noking's day.
(30:16):
I've watched a lot of it indifferent segments on the news.
God bless you and your family.
I'm just in awe of where ourcountry is right now.
It is heart-wrenching,heartbreaking.
We all know our stance on themilitary and law enforcement,
(30:36):
and then for law enforcement tohave to come out and protect
people from illegal people likethis is what I don't get.
And I heard this from um, a verypublic person who talks all the
time, and he had somebody comeup and say how you know he
(30:57):
doesn't think illegals are beingtreated correctly is what the
the person said.
And he's like he goes.
Let me ask you his name'scharlie.
Um, last name starts's like hegoes.
Let me ask you his name'sCharlie.
The last name starts with a Khe goes.
Let me ask you something hesaid if I went to Mexico this
was his words he goes.
(31:17):
If I went to Mexico and I wentinto that country and I expected
to make more money than thecitizens of Mexico and I
expected free health care and Iexpected this and this and this,
and I came into your countryillegally and after getting all
of this and getting more thanyour own citizens make right,
(31:37):
because illegals get a lot more,for the most part, from the
government than our citizens do.
I mean, look at a single momwho's on welfare and on food
stamps and she's legitimate.
I mean she's not milking thesystem, she is legitimately
trying to survive for her kids.
(31:58):
And then the guy goes and then Itake the Hispanic flag and I
just put it in a fire.
He's like how would you feel?
You know, when I've watchedthese videos and I saw people
that took our American flag.
I can't wait to hear my husbandsay oh, they said we do not
script or rehearse or anything.
This is off the cuff took theAmerican flag and burned it, and
(32:20):
it was so many times I saw it Iwould stop watching it when
they threw it.
I couldn't watch it burn andthen complain about how they're
being treated in the UnitedStates but refuse to want to go
back to Mexico.
I don't understand the logicthere.
Maybe my hearing thing isalready affecting my brain,
(32:49):
affecting my brain because howcan you throw in the flag to a
country that's taking you in,even if you crossed illegally,
and then you want to complainthat you're not getting enough,
not getting enough, not gettingenough, but then you refuse to
want to, you know, go back tomexico.
I mean I don't understand that.
Try to explain it to me,because I don't get it back to
Mexico.
I mean I don't understand that,try to explain it to me,
because I don't get it.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
I don't understand that either, because their
politics and their military andtheir law enforcement is so
corrupt that you know they'rejust liable to shoot you and
they leave you dead where you'reat and you know there's no
paperwork involved.
You know there's nothing, youknow, hey, hey it's in order.
He resists arrest, goodbye.
(33:24):
But over here you've got honest.
Well, I won't say honest, butyou've got Americans just doing
their job in protecting thiscountry Out there on the streets
.
I was law enforcement for 13and a half years.
We're just doing a job.
We're just trying to make endsmeet for our family.
We're doing what we thought wasa great idea at the time you
(33:47):
know, and some still might.
After about a year and a half,all that piss and vinegar got
out of me and I learned to relaxand it wasn't all about you
know how many people can Iarrest?
How many people can I get in afight with?
Who am I going to shoot attoday?
It's not all about that.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Have you ever fired your weapon?
I did.
How many times did you shoot ata perp?
Uh, never.
Well, when I said fire yourweapon, I don't mean at the
range you need to be specificI'm talking about while on duty
careful, careful.
How many times did you drawyour weapon?
Speaker 1 (34:24):
A bunch I mean.
So we had level one level zeropresence.
Level one was presence.
You know you're in the uniform.
To level six use a deadly force, which is you drawing your
weapon.
I probably went from one to sixevery time.
(34:44):
I hated my OC spray.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Yeah, a lot of people just spray it in their mouth.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
Yeah, I've never used that on anyone.
I've never used my Aspoton.
You know that's just a metalstick trying to beat up somebody
with.
And then, yeah, then you gotVerbal Judo, you know.
So hey, man, listen, listen tome.
I say okay, you don't like mycountry, man, then get out, just
(35:11):
go back and go to your country.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
But why?
Speaker 1 (35:14):
do they not want to go back?
Make your $20 a month in yourcountry, and that way you don't
have to complain about what isgoing on here in America.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Okay, I know America's great.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I know that Because a lot of countries their minimum
wage is like 61 cents an hour or, like I just said, $20 a month.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
Okay, and I'm not trying to be funny when I bring
this up, but my husband's veryfamiliar because he has been
previously married to othercountries.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
I was married to an illegal who came over here from
El Salvador.
I knew that going into therelationship, I helped her get
her green card.
After she got her green cardshe said, adios, okay, yeah, so
I got the big stiffy Right, butthey okay, yeah, so I got the
(36:08):
big stiffy right, but theysometimes how can I say this?
Speaker 2 (36:13):
I don't blame them for coming here no, but then why
do you want to be so hatefulabout being here when everything
is offered to you?
Speaker 1 (36:20):
that's them, that's not me, I'm not saying you?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
I'm saying I don't understand, you're biting the
hand that feeds you.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
you have to say hand to you.
I'm not saying you, I'm sayingI don't understand.
You have to say hand.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
I'm just saying why come over here if America, in
their opinion, is not a greatcountry?
Why do you want to come overhere in the first place and then
complain about everything, butthen you absolutely do not want
to go back?
I don't know.
Like I can't understand thatand I'm not saying all, but you
(36:54):
know, I mean hell.
There's some bad americans,there's some phenomenal
americans that are not gettingjustifiably recognized for all
that they do.
But in every orchard, in everyphenomenal, there is, like, some
really crappy individuals, andthat's a given.
Hey, faith, everybody knowsthat.
(37:15):
You know there are bad applesin the orchard and that's not
all of them.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
I think that's enough on that tangent all of them
Think of that's enough andthat's it.
So I'm glad y'all had a goodFather's Day, as I did.
As we end it here, well, sundayJune 15th.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
Well, it'll be out in the morning, so they'll be
doing their thing at the am.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
And thank you for you know being patient with us
while we work through our audioit will be fixed.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
Technical issues, please go to.
You can do um.
Either go on any of a websiteand you can see buy me a coffee,
which is our scholarship, oryou can do
buymeacoffeevictoriacure.
Or go to our academy and youcan also do a scholarship there.
(38:10):
We got eight this past week.
I would love to get 10, ifthat's possible, this week.
I would love to keep doing this, especially because during the
summer, like the single momshave to work and then the kiddos
could come in here and do thesebeautiful camp stucco squad fun
(38:32):
activity games and lessons andthings like that.
So help us meet our goal of 10this week.
You know we're doing it littleby little so they
contagiouswildcom.
Yes, and then on the website, inthe corner it says buy me a
coffee.
But you click on it and it'sall about transformation and you
can see it.
(38:53):
It goes into detail about allof the scholarship offerings,
because you never know, one dayyou might need it and we will
not turn you away either.
So, please, it's only you knowyou can.
The minimum is $5.
You can go as high as you wantto, but think about it Offering
just something, and you can doit anonymously, and if you want
(39:14):
a shout out, we'll give you thattoo.
But we really want to be ableto help pay it forward and give
somebody some self-esteemboosting and some fun and
laughter that people sodesperately deserve, because
every smile tells a story.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
It's contagious happy father's day, thank y'all.
Good night from a contagioussmile.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
I'm just gonna say before we go off that I really
like this edgy vocal side of you, so it's a good thing we're
signing off now, so bye.
Uh-oh, is it on now?
Howdy y'all.
Welcome to another episode ofTake a Smile, unstoppable with
the lovely and always sexyVictoria Depends who you ask.
And me, michael Redneck,husband.
Let's go ahead and give a bighappy Father's Day to all us
(00:24):
fathers out there.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
And the moms who play both roles, because I did that
for a long time.
Speaker 1 (00:29):
Okay, yes, and the moms who play dads Speaking of
that.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
So you know one thing that gets my goat yeah, I'm
just going to enjoy my sweet andsour chicken a la rice.
Go ahead.
Speaker 1 (00:44):
Is these piece of shit men out there that
abandoned, leave this old runwaytheir cowardly self tail,
between the legs after they aretold or come to realize that
their child has certainchallenges.
(01:04):
Their baby, their infant Idon't know the correct words.
You're beyond a coward, you'rebeyond a piece of shit for
leaving that mother, yournewborn baby, just because you
don't want to deal with thechallenges that the medical
appointments oh, this is goingto inconvenience your life
(01:28):
Preach.
So F you, you know, you know,oh, it pisses me off.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Okay.
So in the NICU the divorce rateis obscene and it's normally.
Normally, 99% of the time it isthe man who leaves the
relationship, whether or notthey don't want involvement
(02:02):
because one reason or another.
They don't want involvementbecause one reason or another.
They don't want to say thattheir child has.
Whatever the situation may be,do you know what?
I've had the pleasure of workingwith the most amazing kiddos.
None of them are disabled, noneof them are, you know,
(02:22):
medically incompetent.
They just learn at a differentpace.
They learn in a different way.
They go down a differentjourney and you know what?
Those journeys are morebeautiful because we don't have
those assholes taking up theview.
You know what I mean.
And we don't take, excuse me,we don't take one minute for
granted.
(02:42):
I don't take a laugh forgranted.
I didn't hear our daughter.
She hiccuped once prior to theplacement of the tracheostomy,
but other than that I didn'teven get to hear her until she
was two and a half years old.
I didn't get the coups andcause and all that stuff.
And then we've had people inour family when she had her
(03:06):
trach placed and she had it fora couple of years.
That would say something likedon't say a word to your lawyer,
folks thinking it was comical.
It's not comical.
And then, after decannulation,the same individual would make
some stupid comment Like I likedit better when you weren't able
to talk.
I mean individual would makesome stupid comment like I liked
(03:27):
it better when you weren't ableto talk.
I mean people are just beyondignorant and I don't want to say
it's ignorant because theycognitively know what they're
saying.
They, they know.
I mean I don't want to givethem that credit, but they do.
They, they think they're beingfunny, but they it's like how do
I make an excuse for you beinga downright prick?
You know how did that happen?
Speaker 1 (03:49):
So this is by no means taken away from us dads,
us fathers, stepfathers, adoptedfathers.
You know your father.
Speaker 2 (04:00):
Grandfathers.
My grandfather was the best.
I mean the best.
I'm stirring up.
Best, I mean the best.
You couldn't have gotten better.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
It's 11.20pm when we are right now and we're eating
chicken and rice as a littlemidnight snack.
But yeah, thank you to all ofyou fathers.
You can take up the mantle andtake care of that child, who may
not be yours biologically, butif you've adopted them, you've
(04:32):
included them into your family,your circle.
Speaker 2 (04:35):
But two pugs in a push doesn't give you the right
to be an ass.
No, I mean seriously, it reallydoesn't.
I mean you think about it.
Just because you lay downdoesn't mean you get to.
There's you another littleconnect that you don't get to.
You know, dump and run.
I mean I don't know how else tosay it.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
How else do you say but I had a great Father's Day.
I woke up and Well, I deserveit.
We had dad daughter movie nightso like three in the morning.
Speaker 2 (05:14):
I deserve it which dog is under my leg, of course
exactly that's why I have thebest kid your favorite.
Speaker 1 (05:23):
She has you wrapped she actually cooked me breakfast
she made him an omelet?
Speaker 2 (05:30):
did she give you bananas with it?
No buttered raisin bread toastoh, so she didn't share her
lemon blueberry.
Speaker 1 (05:45):
She has lemon blueberry bread and she shares
it with me, and we were downthere topping off chocolate cake
a while ago, so I had a goodFather's Day.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
You got so many gifts .
Which one was your favorite?
My knife.
Speaker 1 (06:02):
Which, oh gosh, I got a knife.
I got a great little pocketknife, another one.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Flashlight.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
One of 400.
Flashlight I got a metaldetector Right.
Speaker 2 (06:11):
Who gets a metal?
Speaker 1 (06:12):
detector on Father's Day.
That's awesome.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
What about, oh we?
Speaker 1 (06:15):
got a shooting A laser.
What was it called A laser guntraining shooting?
Speaker 2 (06:25):
Right, you're dry, firing Right.
And then your wife got you anoffice chair and a new desk that
I still have to put together.
Well, it's not hard to put aleather chair together.
You're still young and dag-dabit.
Every time I had a gift for himsomewhere, I'm like no, no, no,
no, no.
We don't hide anything fromeach other ever.
(06:46):
And he's like woman, let me getsomething out of your purse.
I'm like no, because that'slike the one place I had left to
hide something.
I mean, he was finding stufftwo weeks before Father's Day.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
Speaking of.
We don't hide anything fromeach other.
Someone just found that outtonight after a conversation,
that my loyalty is to my wifeabove all others.
Wait, say that again.
This is my wife, this is mysoulmate, this is my partner.
We do everything together.
(07:20):
There are no secrets, there areno skeletons in either closet.
So you know.
To the guy out there can I sayguy Sure, who thunk, who thunk
that I would be loyal to him?
Forget it, pal.
Forget about it.
Yeah, forget about it.
Speaker 2 (07:40):
That was kind of sexy , you don't even come close.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
No, they're going to take you three lifetimes.
No, he couldn't even do it then.
No, anyway.
Speaker 2 (07:52):
So congratulations, we were just awarded an amazing
award.
So congratulations to AContagious Smile my husband.
Talk about all the awards andstuff.
I'm too humble, I don't do thatstuff.
No, I don't do it.
We all know you can chat withstuff in your mouth.
Speaker 1 (08:15):
Easy greasy.
So, I don't know all the awardsmy wife has.
She just recently got abouteight awards from different
magazines, different companies.
I know she's getting featuredin the New York Times.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
International Business Journal Insider Weekly
Women's.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Week.
Is it New York Times?
No, it's just Time Magazine.
No, it's not Time.
Speaker 2 (08:40):
Magazine.
It's some New York.
I haven't gotten it yet.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
See, I can't even keep up with them.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
They got Insider Weekly.
Insider Weekly Featured us forBest Of transformative trauma
advocate, which was awesome, andthen Women's Weekly and Women's
Week and a bunch of newsstations affiliate of ABC did
(09:12):
articles on us.
I do not have all theinformation yet.
I will get it out there when Ido.
I have been asked to be one of100 women who will be doing
about a 12-minute live speech,if you will, and it's going to
be featured on Roku television.
(09:34):
It's going to be featuredFacebook, instagram, tiktok,
linkedin, a couple of othermajor stations and then, of
course, we're having it recordedso that we can put it out here
for anybody who might miss it.
I'll have more details of thathere this week.
(09:55):
That's an incredible honor.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
I want to give a thank you to Ray Lewis, who
recently sent in a cameo aboutpromoting our academies that we
have up and running.
So, thank you if y'all haven'tseen him.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
He's on our Facebook.
He's everywhere and now we haveour own channel, facebook
Academy channel.
I have one for authoring stuffthat I've done, and then a
contagious small now has achannel and it's starting to
like just go crazy, likeeverything is just coming to the
(10:35):
forefront.
Finally, it's been a long timein the making.
I'm I hate how long it hastaken because I'm doing the job
of like 30 people and I'm doingit one-handed and it takes a
very long time and I ammeticulous about things when it
comes to the placement ofeverything and make sure it
(10:56):
looks right and it's fun andit's great and it has great, you
know information.
So it does take a little bitlonger than it would joey bag of
donuts, um, but it's going tobe super, super fun and we're
partnering with ripple retreat,my dear friend and brother, jj,
who is to Ripple Retreat andcheck him out.
(11:18):
He is phenomenal.
What a story he has.
He has such a huge heart.
I had him on as a guest on hisbirthday and he was celebrating
many years of sobriety.
His story will pull at yourheartstrings.
His story will pull at yourheartstrings.
He is such a light Like.
(11:39):
He served our country withpride and honor and now he is
paying it forward with a rippleretreat, which is this is
phenomenal.
He has a facility where peoplewho are recovering and are in
some type of recovery can go,and on the weekends he's doing
(12:01):
where you could have weddingsand stuff, but it's alcohol-free
weddings.
So like, if you have drunkuncle joe, he can't bring
alcohol, um, and there's noalcohol here, so he can't come
out here and ruin your event orwhatever.
And JJ's just a stellarstand-up.
Jj's awesome Right guy andy'all need to check him out and
(12:26):
if y'all can, you know, supporthim in any way, please do so,
because it's amazing.
Speaker 1 (12:32):
We had another special guest come on our show
or not our show, but drop bytoday and I want to shout out to
DJ Blacks.
He came to spend a couple hourswith us.
As y'all can probably hear, wehave some audio quality that we
need to address.
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Which is coming and will be changed by next week,
right?
Speaker 1 (12:50):
So fair with us on this audio quality.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
I know it probably sucks right now, but, in all
fairness, we have been fundingall of this ourselves.
It is so outright expensive,and even paying, like our
academy, is so under cost wiselike it's I'm not under cost,
but undervalued in regards tothe courses are so much cheaper
(13:16):
than the value of them, becausewe want it to be affordable for
everybody, and we have many,many courses that are free.
However, we still have to payfor the platforms and all the
other software and everythingelse that we do on a daily basis
, and so we're just trying tobreak even.
We're not trying to do a getrich thing by any means.
(13:37):
Break even.
We're not trying to do a getrich thing by any means.
So our audio has taken a turnfor the worst because our
equipment is way overused and Iam also in the.
The desire and need of a newcomputer.
My one computer that we doeverything on hates me, um,
because if you open it right now, I think there's like 52 tabs
(13:59):
open and we're runningeverything on it, and it's the
only thing we could afford.
And so we've had this computerfor many, many, many years and I
need to upgrade, but it's justnot financially feasible for us
at this point in time, so we'rehaving to wait on that, but we
(14:20):
are upgrading our audioequipment.
It will be this week, so thenext podcast will be amazing and
you guys will be like, wow,they have great content and they
sound good.
So you'll be able to hear thedifference in who Michael and
who Victoria is.
You'll know the redneck andyou'll hear the redhead.
So that's in the works as wellis.
Speaker 1 (14:39):
You'll know the redneck and you'll hear the
redhead.
So that's in the works as well.
Welcome to all the newsubscribers in our academy.
Thank y'all.
We've had some positive reviews, some feedback from those that
have taken several of thecourses.
The kiddos absolutely love it.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
And we've had people buying the scholarships.
So we've had in the last week Ithink, we've had right now up
to eight scholarships purchasedand they're only $5 a piece.
You can purchase higher volumeand higher price scholarships,
which means you'll be able topay it forward.
(15:17):
You could do it in honor ofsomebody you know.
One in four, statistically, ofvictims are women and one in
four women are in some type oftraumatic abusive relationship
in their lifetime.
So think about it you have amom, you have a sister, you have
a wife and you have a daughter,and one of those four, god
(15:39):
forbid, could be a victim ofabuse.
And if they couldn't afford it,then we take care of it.
But then what we do is we takethat money that's sitting there
in the scholarship fund and weuse that, and so we've had eight
different scholarshipspurchased this week alone.
We would like to try for 10 thenext week and keep going every
(16:02):
week.
We will never turn anyone away,and it's not even the cost of a
Starbucks.
Like to go to McDonald's andget like a I don't know.
A Happy Meal is more than a $5cup of coffee.
Happy meal is more than a $5cup of coffee, and to know that
(16:24):
you're doing that and paying itforward makes you feel so good
inside because you're helpingsomeone.
And you know what, one day youmight be on top of the world and
the next day you might not beand you have no idea it's coming
, and I'm here to tell you.
I walked that by myself andthat's why we do what we do.
I never want anyone else tohave to do that, because you
don't know when it's coming.
I, I'm here to tell you.
I walked that by myself andthat's why we do what we do.
I never want anyone else tohave to do that Because you
don't know when it's coming.
I had a six-figure career acouple decades ago and little
(16:46):
did I know that I would be, youknow, beyond broke and poor
shortly thereafter.
But you do what you need to dofor your family.
If you're not a deadbeat, posum and you stand up and do
what's right, treat others theway you want to be treated and
you know what.
(17:07):
To hell with everybody else.
Seriously, you know, I look atit like it's a rite of passage
because I actually was talkingwith that individual my husband
was referencing earlier and it'slike you know, here's the thing
if you look at a family tree,you might have bloodline where
you have okay, there's somebranches here or whatever but
(17:28):
even a family tree has some deadlimbs right, and so you think
about that and it's like youcan't pick your family.
You can pick your ass, you canpick your nose, but you can't
pick your family, and that'sthat's really sad.
That's really sad because theyshould be there unconditionally,
(17:49):
no matter what, when you needthem.
But when they need you, youbetter believe they're going to
be front and center, want help,and the question is do you give
it to them?
Do you help them, in spite ofthe hurt, pain and trauma they
caused you?
Because if you don't, are youjust like them or do you like?
(18:13):
We have a saying in our home wewant no drama, drama and we
have a quaint, quiet,comfortable home and we don't
let the crap in, we don't letthe people trying to come in and
start crap.
(18:33):
And you build a strongfoundation and you're as strong
as your weakest link.
Speaker 1 (18:47):
And so you keep that weakest link at bay and you keep
everybody else.
Speaker 2 (18:51):
He's laughing at me, you know you keep everybody else
at bay.
Um, because you want a happyenvironment, you want a happy
home, and that's you know.
I'll confess something to youright now which totally kind of
left you all.
That's not surprising for me,but you know we found out that
the hearing in my right ear,which is only like 8%.
I'm 92% deaf in my right earfrom the trauma of my abuse.
(19:14):
I haven't worn my hearing aidsin a while because I can't, and
my otolaryngologist understoodthat.
We talked about it this pastweek and I'm 80 something
percent deaf in the left ear.
So I rely on my hearing aids,which I can't wear.
And I read people's lips butlike if we're in here recording
that it's Michael and I I canhear him because it's only him.
(19:36):
If Faith was in here and theywere both talking, it sounds
like.
And if the TV is on, forget it,I can't distinguish what's what
.
So my surgeon, after dozens ofsurgeries, basically told me
that we need to do somethingcalled a shutdown or a stitch
(19:56):
down or whatever it is, whereit's like a fine thing painting
on a wall, where you look at itand you're like, oh, that's nice
, but it absolutely has nofunction to it, and so that
would be kind of what they wantto do now.
And then there's a possibilityof a cochlear implant and I'm
like, oh great, something elseto plug up in me every day,
right, like I need a usb,whatever you call those things,
(20:19):
hub, and we need one that haslike 15 plugs to be able to do
everything, because I am like,seriously, I don't need to take
a shower, I need a wd-40, youknow wash, because that's
basically what it is, and Iliterally have more metal in me,
I think, than working humanparts.
And what scares me and I'venoticed it slightly, and now I'm
(20:43):
becoming self-conscious aboutit.
This is a long way around sayingwhat I was going to confess is
I was told that as thisprogresses, my speech changes
and like, if you ever listen toMarlee Matlin, right, like
people are like who is that?
First of all, she's completely,100% deaf.
(21:03):
She was on Dancing with theStars and she paid attention to
the rhythmic sound on the floor,right, and her partner, who I
don't remember who it was, gaveher pointers, like where he
would make a sign or somethingto remind her where she was in
sequence of her dance.
But if you listen to her talkfirst of all, I think she's an
(21:24):
amazing human being and if youlisten to her talk, you can tell
that her speech is muchdifferent because she doesn't
hear how to articulate the wordscorrectly, so her speech is
different.
And so when you're losing yourhearing and you don't hear it
all the time it's you'restarting to make different
pronunciations of words, and Iknow, know that's happening.
(21:45):
I've heard it on some words andI know that it's going to be
coming more and more, and ourdaughter, faith, thinks that's
awesome because I'll sound likeher a little bit.
But it scares me.
She does, she is perfect.
But it scares me because I'm soused to being articulate and
(22:06):
doing speaking engagements andinternational speaking
engagements and, um, to knowthat my, my speech will continue
to, like I don't know,disintegrate into I don't know
what it's it's your family'sgonna be here and to I don't
(22:27):
know what it's it's your family.
Well, and I appreciate that I do.
But I'm a person who speaks tothe public and to know I mean
there are some words that I saythat I hear now are a little
different and I'm sure you wantto, you'll admit that you've
heard it too, and it's quitebothersome because I've always
(22:48):
been this person that has spokenin front of others ever since I
was in high school, in thedebate team right, and so like
for me to.
I know that's shocking I was onthe debate team right, but like
to conversate with someone.
I know that my words are goingto not be as fluid for others
and, you know, if you're bornthat way, faith has such a great
(23:08):
outlook on everything becauseshe'll say I don't know any
different, because that's theonly thing I've ever known.
Well, I've known this and nowit's something else I have to
learn, right?
So when I hear people who arelike pieces of crap and they
don't care when their child,grandchild or whatever is in a
hospital for surgery 5, 10, 50or one their first surgery, you
(23:32):
know, one doesn't make anydifferent than 50 and you can't
be bothered by that.
And then you go throughsomething where it's like you
know and you and that personwants to be a complete jerk
about life.
But then you go throughsomething where it's like you
know and that person wants to bea complete jerk about life.
But then you have someone andI've said this a hundred times
If anybody has the right to beabsolutely bitter and nasty and
(23:53):
just downright gross, I wouldhands down.
No offense, say me, hands down,because if you look at the fact
that I am learning how to livelife all over again, one handed
right, instead of being like, ok, I'm just going to give in and
not care anymore, I will open abottle, I can tie my own shoes,
I do all my own grooming, right?
(24:14):
I mean, yeah, you have to learnhow to do it.
It's just like journaling yourway through a different path
because you have to take it.
You don't have a say in it.
There are times I get sofrustrated and I get clumsy, my
balance is off.
I get that.
And then now it's like is it ajoke, am I going to be equal?
(24:35):
Because my left arm is missingand my right side will no longer
have hearing or soundcapability of any kind.
So does that balance me out,you know?
And then I have this thing inmy back my face is all metal.
I have like 32 pieces of metalin my face.
So I mean it's just like when Igo to a uh anywhere that I have
(24:56):
to go through a metal detector.
I'm like here, pick a card, anycard, and it's all like she has
all these metal bodies andstuff and I've never seen a more
beautiful woman especially whenyour eyes are closed.
But it's tough.
It is tough and then you thinkabout well, why do some people
(25:18):
act the way that they do?
Like I heard that someone elsethat I know unfortunately has a
child that I believe is on thevery high end of the spectrum of
autism See Autism and she yellsat him all the time, and I was
told that he's constantlythreatened Like if you don't
(25:39):
stop acting this way, I'm goingto take away your car, I'm going
to take away the phone, I'mgoing to take away this.
First of all, it's not in hiscontrol, right?
He is on the high end of autismand he can't have loud sounds
and other things you have totake into consideration.
It doesn't mean you can't livelife.
It just means you have to dothings a little differently.
(26:02):
You know like our whole lifehas been revolved around doing
things differently for Faith andmyself, but I wouldn't give up
our journey because we have metthe most incredible people along
the way.
We've learned how to do newthings that nobody else would
ever know shoes one handed, orwash their hair my hair's down
(26:25):
to my waist.
Wash shampoo, condition, brush,comb out your hair, you know,
shave do all the stuff you haveto do and do it one handed right
.
It's not easy.
It's not easy, it's not.
You know the cook cooking andstirring a pot and at the same
(26:45):
time trying to hold the potwhile you're stirring and while
you're holding it, you know, orcarrying a very heavy cooking
dish to the table.
There are things that are quitethe challenge, especially
because I'm weight limited onthat arm, because what a lot of
people also don't know is thatmy shoulder has been replaced in
that arm.
So I go big or go home, right,it's like all or nothing.
(27:06):
So the shoulder's been replaced, I'm missing most of the arm, I
have no hand and I'm weightlimited.
But my prosthetic, my originalprosthetic, weighed more than
the weight I was allowed tocarry and it's like, if anybody
has the right to be nasty,downright hideous, I think it
would be me, and that's not metrying to pat myself on the back
(27:29):
.
My husband will tell you I'm thefurthest from that, but I get
up every day.
Sometimes it's much harder thanothers.
I'll get up with headaches thatliterally make me want to just
stay in bed, but I get up everysingle day and then I think of
these pieces of crap that have achild, a child who did not ask
to come into this world andthey're.
(27:50):
They're in a hospital bed andall they want is love,
unconditional love.
They don't want anything else.
They're not asking about whatkind of car.
They don't care if you have aLexus or a Yugo, right, they
don't know the difference inthem.
They want unconditional loveand acceptance for who they are.
Because you're wanting them toaccept you for being a prick.
(28:10):
But they're laying there and ifyou look down at your own child
and they're laying in a hospitalbed and all they want is your
time and your love and you can'tgive them that.
You don't deserve to have themaround.
You don't deserve.
That child will love youunconditionally, unlike any
other person in your life.
(28:31):
Faith has taught me love in away that you there's this love
and connection and bonding thatwe have and and bonding that we
have and she teaches me newthings every day.
But when you look at people whoare like, oh, I got to go do
(28:52):
this for myself, I got to go dothat for myself, I got to do
this, I got to do that, and theycan't make time for what is
amazing and loving that's rightin front of you, then they're
going to be very old and aloneand miserable, and it might take
(29:13):
10, 20, 50, 60 years, but thatthat's karma.
Speaker 1 (29:19):
You know, you got about a hundred thousand
millennials right now looking upthe word.
What the heck is a Yugo?
That's all you got fromeverything.
I just said Nope, but I wantnow looking up the word.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
What the heck is a yugo?
That's all you got fromeverything.
I just said Nope, but I want tothrow that in there.
A yugo, what's a yugo there?
Speaker 1 (29:32):
Redneck, it's a claw.
Speaker 2 (29:34):
It was a claw.
It is a claw.
Well, we have things out therenow that look like an egg with
wheels, right, those tiny littlethings that look like you have
to.
Yeah, it looks like you don'twind it up to make it go.
To make it.
Oh my gosh, like never, ever,would I ever.
I'd rather.
No, no, I just can't.
(29:54):
Things are too tiny.
It's like a coffin ready to go.
I mean, you can't survive that.
You got hit by a bunny rabbitcrossing the road at the same
time.
That you got hit by a bunnyrabbit crossing the road at the
same time, right, I mean,there's just no way.
And I want to take a moment andshout out to the law enforcement
officers that stood fast for noking's day.
(30:16):
I've watched a lot of it indifferent segments on the news.
God bless you and your family.
I'm just in awe of where ourcountry is right now.
It is heart-wrenching,heartbreaking.
We all know our stance on themilitary and law enforcement,
(30:36):
and then for law enforcement tohave to come out and protect
people from illegal people likethis is what I don't get.
And I heard this from um, a verypublic person who talks all the
time, and he had somebody comeup and say how you know he
(30:57):
doesn't think illegals are beingtreated correctly is what the
the person said.
And he's like he goes.
Let me ask you his name'scharlie.
Um, last name starts's like hegoes.
Let me ask you his name'sCharlie.
The last name starts with a Khe goes.
Let me ask you something hesaid if I went to Mexico this
was his words he goes.
(31:17):
If I went to Mexico and I wentinto that country and I expected
to make more money than thecitizens of Mexico and I
expected free health care and Iexpected this and this and this,
and I came into your countryillegally and after getting all
of this and getting more thanyour own citizens make right,
(31:37):
because illegals get a lot more,for the most part, from the
government than our citizens do.
I mean, look at a single momwho's on welfare and on food
stamps and she's legitimate.
I mean she's not milking thesystem, she is legitimately
trying to survive for her kids.
(31:58):
And then the guy goes and then Itake the Hispanic flag and I
just put it in a fire.
He's like how would you feel?
You know, when I've watchedthese videos and I saw people
that took our American flag.
I can't wait to hear my husbandsay oh, they said we do not
script or rehearse or anything.
This is off the cuff took theAmerican flag and burned it, and
(32:20):
it was so many times I saw it Iwould stop watching it when
they threw it.
I couldn't watch it burn andthen complain about how they're
being treated in the UnitedStates but refuse to want to go
back to Mexico.
I don't understand the logicthere.
Maybe my hearing thing isalready affecting my brain,
(32:49):
affecting my brain because howcan you throw in the flag to a
country that's taking you in,even if you crossed illegally,
and then you want to complainthat you're not getting enough,
not getting enough, not gettingenough, but then you refuse to
want to, you know, go back tomexico.
I mean I don't understand that.
Try to explain it to me,because I don't get it back to
Mexico.
I mean I don't understand that,try to explain it to me,
because I don't get it.
Speaker 1 (33:04):
I don't understand that either, because their
politics and their military andtheir law enforcement is so
corrupt that you know they'rejust liable to shoot you and
they leave you dead where you'reat and you know there's no
paperwork involved.
You know there's nothing, youknow, hey, hey it's in order.
He resists arrest, goodbye.
(33:24):
But over here you've got honest.
Well, I won't say honest, butyou've got Americans just doing
their job in protecting thiscountry Out there on the streets
.
I was law enforcement for 13and a half years.
We're just doing a job.
We're just trying to make endsmeet for our family.
We're doing what we thought wasa great idea at the time you
(33:47):
know, and some still might.
After about a year and a half,all that piss and vinegar got
out of me and I learned to relaxand it wasn't all about you
know how many people can Iarrest?
How many people can I get in afight with?
Who am I going to shoot attoday?
It's not all about that.
Speaker 2 (34:06):
Have you ever fired your weapon?
I did.
How many times did you shoot ata perp?
Uh, never.
Well, when I said fire yourweapon, I don't mean at the
range you need to be specificI'm talking about while on duty
careful, careful.
How many times did you drawyour weapon?
Speaker 1 (34:24):
A bunch I mean.
So we had level one level zeropresence.
Level one was presence.
You know you're in the uniform.
To level six use a deadly force, which is you drawing your
weapon.
I probably went from one to sixevery time.
(34:44):
I hated my OC spray.
Speaker 2 (34:47):
Yeah, a lot of people just spray it in their mouth.
Speaker 1 (34:50):
Yeah, I've never used that on anyone.
I've never used my Aspoton.
You know that's just a metalstick trying to beat up somebody
with.
And then, yeah, then you gotVerbal Judo, you know.
So hey, man, listen, listen tome.
I say okay, you don't like mycountry, man, then get out, just
(35:11):
go back and go to your country.
Speaker 2 (35:13):
But why?
Speaker 1 (35:14):
do they not want to go back?
Make your $20 a month in yourcountry, and that way you don't
have to complain about what isgoing on here in America.
Speaker 2 (35:24):
Okay, I know America's great.
Speaker 1 (35:27):
I know that Because a lot of countries their minimum
wage is like 61 cents an hour or, like I just said, $20 a month.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
Okay, and I'm not trying to be funny when I bring
this up, but my husband's veryfamiliar because he has been
previously married to othercountries.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
I was married to an illegal who came over here from
El Salvador.
I knew that going into therelationship, I helped her get
her green card.
After she got her green cardshe said, adios, okay, yeah, so
I got the big stiffy Right, butthey okay, yeah, so I got the
(36:08):
big stiffy right, but theysometimes how can I say this?
Speaker 2 (36:13):
I don't blame them for coming here no, but then why
do you want to be so hatefulabout being here when everything
is offered to you?
Speaker 1 (36:20):
that's them, that's not me, I'm not saying you?
Speaker 2 (36:23):
I'm saying I don't understand, you're biting the
hand that feeds you.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
you have to say hand to you.
I'm not saying you, I'm sayingI don't understand.
You have to say hand.
Speaker 2 (36:30):
I'm just saying why come over here if America, in
their opinion, is not a greatcountry?
Why do you want to come overhere in the first place and then
complain about everything, butthen you absolutely do not want
to go back?
I don't know.
Like I can't understand thatand I'm not saying all, but you
(36:54):
know, I mean hell.
There's some bad americans,there's some phenomenal
americans that are not gettingjustifiably recognized for all
that they do.
But in every orchard, in everyphenomenal, there is, like, some
really crappy individuals, andthat's a given.
Hey, faith, everybody knowsthat.
(37:15):
You know there are bad applesin the orchard and that's not
all of them.
Speaker 1 (37:21):
I think that's enough on that tangent all of them
Think of that's enough andthat's it.
So I'm glad y'all had a goodFather's Day, as I did.
As we end it here, well, sundayJune 15th.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
Well, it'll be out in the morning, so they'll be
doing their thing at the am.
Speaker 1 (37:43):
And thank you for you know being patient with us
while we work through our audioit will be fixed.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
Technical issues, please go to.
You can do um.
Either go on any of a websiteand you can see buy me a coffee,
which is our scholarship, oryou can do
buymeacoffeevictoriacure.
Or go to our academy and youcan also do a scholarship there.
(38:10):
We got eight this past week.
I would love to get 10, ifthat's possible, this week.
I would love to keep doing this, especially because during the
summer, like the single momshave to work and then the kiddos
could come in here and do thesebeautiful camp stucco squad fun
(38:32):
activity games and lessons andthings like that.
So help us meet our goal of 10this week.
You know we're doing it littleby little so they
contagiouswildcom.
Yes, and then on the website, inthe corner it says buy me a
coffee.
But you click on it and it'sall about transformation and you
can see it.
(38:53):
It goes into detail about allof the scholarship offerings,
because you never know, one dayyou might need it and we will
not turn you away either.
So, please, it's only you knowyou can.
The minimum is $5.
You can go as high as you wantto, but think about it Offering
just something, and you can doit anonymously, and if you want
(39:14):
a shout out, we'll give you thattoo.
But we really want to be ableto help pay it forward and give
somebody some self-esteemboosting and some fun and
laughter that people sodesperately deserve, because
every smile tells a story.
Speaker 1 (39:28):
It's contagious happy father's day, thank y'all.
Good night from a contagioussmile.
Speaker 2 (39:34):
I'm just gonna say before we go off that I really
like this edgy vocal side of you, so it's a good thing we're
signing off now, so bye.
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