Episode Transcript
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not stabbing it. An Afarious Nightmarecontains themes that may be explicit or triggering.
For some specific warnings and disclaimers willbe mentioned in the show notes.
An Afarious Nightmare assumes all parties thatare mentioned in these cases to be innocent
unless proven guilty in a court oflaw. The listener discretion is strongly advised.
(03:30):
You can help us grow the showby leaving us a five star written
review on Apple Podcast or Spotify,or you can join our Patreon for light
hearted bonus content with this Welcome toseason six. Today, we will be
discussing Samantha Tapp, a sixteen yearold girl who grew up in the system
alongside her close sibling Kindle. Samwent missing from her home in Burlison,
(03:53):
Texas, back in two thousand andfour and has since been classified as an
endangered runway. Many believe that thosewho go missing for long periods of time
have in fact succumbed to murder.However, for Kendall and Sam's best friend
Vanessa, they believe otherwise. Youknow, empathy is a funny thing.
(04:15):
Everyone circling you telling you one thing, but your gut instinct is telling you
something completely different. And you can'tdisregard your gut instinct because it rarely,
if ever fails you. And that'swhat we've been telling you all from the
very beginning, is to never ignorethat feeling. So to honor the wishes
of the two young ladies that we'reinterviewing today, we will not presume that
(04:38):
Sam Tapp has left the earth realm. And I'm Courtney Fenner and I'm Amanda
Cronin and an nefarious nightmare presents?Are you listening? Missing Samantha Tap?
(05:12):
Unbeknownst to us, this season seemsto have a bit of a theme going
on. The majority of the crimesand mysteries that we're discussing have all been
in Texas. Last week, wetraveled to Fort Worth, which is about
one hundred and fifty miles northeast ofBrownwood, where the heartbreaking case of Leon
Lorellis had occurred, and from FortWorth we're taking a short day trip to
Burlison, where I actually lived whenwe first started this podcast. Burlason is
(05:38):
only about sixteen miles south of FortWorth and is usually a straight shot on
I thirty five. However, ifyou know anything about I thirty five,
you know that, depending on traffic, you could be there in eighteen minutes,
or you can be there in twohours, which has actually happened to
me. Welcome to Texas, y'all. Texas is vast, so while the
(06:01):
initial shock of stuff happening here neverreally wears off, it's also not a
surprise that there has been a plethoraof cases to discuss. Not to compare,
well, maybe a little. Ifyou see it like New Mexico,
where there's a lot of desert butbordered by bigger cities and metropolitan areas,
(06:23):
then we would guess at approximately fortyeight percent of missing persons cases could be
solved if we had a lot offoot searches happening in our vast desert areas.
Now we know that these statistics areimpossible to accurately portray, and this
isn't to say that we think allof those who are missing are deceased,
(06:45):
but we do, unfortunately have towake up to the fact that many are.
We have to keep in mind thatmissing does not always equate to murdered,
but many unfortunately are. In thiscase, however, we will be
talking to two people who believed thatthe missing is actually still alive. Ironically,
and speaking of Texas, Amana andI actually met Kendale and Vanessa at
(07:10):
the True Crime and Paranormal Podcast Festivalin Austin this year. I went outside
to just get away from the socialanxiety that I was having, only to
meet two young ladies outside, andI would describe the initial meeting as a
little uncomfortable and awkward, as Iwould come to find out during the interview
that all three of us were actuallyin great company with each other. I
(07:30):
found out that we all were steppingout of our comfort zone and introducing ourselves.
All three of us have been knownare self described to be socially awkward,
but when you're at any networking orsocial event, you have to do
just that, me social and network. So I asked them if they had
a podcast, and they told methat they were there to talk about their
missing sister and friend, Samantha tapand I felt it in my belly that
(07:55):
I really wanted to help these ladiesout in some way, especially because they're
big. To ask is that theywant everybody to talk about Sam and to
remember Sam. So here we aredoing this episode, so let's find out
who Sam is. Samantha Leanne Tappwent missing from Burlason, Texas, on
October twelfth, two thousand and four, at the age of sixteen. She
(08:18):
is described as a free spirit,a little rebellious, and very funny.
She is a white female with brunettehair piercing and deep brown eyes, a
smile with a retiring nature behind it, and last scene at approximately five four
to five six and between one hundredand twelve to one hundred and twenty pounds.
(08:41):
Despite her older sister Kendall's efforts toclassify her disappearance as a missing person's
case, law enforcement initially designated itas a runaway situation. Samantha and Kendall
had experienced a difficult family situation andspent time in foster care before reuniting with
their grandparents in Burlisson. On theday of her disappearance, Samantha visited Kendall,
(09:05):
but left angrily after an argument Kendallassumed Samantha would return, but she
never did. Today, Kendall believesin her heart that Sam is still alive,
and while our minds always want togo to the dark places, we
don't want to discourage that hope.So we will assume that Sam is still
alive, in hope that by somemiracle, she is listening, or someone
(09:28):
that knows her currently is. Becausethis is the case of a sister desperately
searching for her beloved sibling. Someof you listening to this episode will likely
assume that Kendale and Vanessa were unfazedby all of this, and you might
even note a bit of playfulness whenremembering certain quirks between them and their dynamic.
(09:50):
But let me ask you all aquestion ahead of this. If you
were missing, would you want yourfamily and friends to dissolve all hope and
be sad all the time? Idon't think so. This is a situation
that's hard to digest for anyone,but certainly Sam wouldn't expect anything less from
these two. While they remember thelighter and quirky times, it reminds us
(10:11):
all of the many nuances of afriendship or a sibling dynamic because what I
saw while interviewing and speaking with thesetwo were two strong and tenacious women who
just want their friend and their sisterback, and at the very least to
know where she is. I sawthem both start to break down and cry,
and I wish I could express howthat made my heart feel. And
(10:35):
it's a situation that seems like it'swithout hope. But these two will not
stand down until they know something.And I'm sure that you all can respect
that. I know, I fuckingdo. We sat down with Kendall,
Sam's sister, and Vanessa, Sam'sbest friend, and we will go ahead
and give the floor to them totell you about it. My name is
(10:56):
Kendall Wyatt. I am a Samantha'ssister, her older sister. I am
thirty six years old from Burlas inTexas, and I have two kids and
a wife and grandparents who live withme, two dogs. I'm an IT
professional. I suppose I've got mymaster's in information technology and I do nerd
(11:20):
stuff all day. In my sparetime, I do like to diy stuff
at my house. Samantha is mysister, so I have known her forever.
I'm Vanessa Steppin and I'm thirty five. I am married and I've been
married for six years to my husband. We don't have any kids, but
(11:41):
we have one one eyed poodle andhe's fantastic. Sam was my best friend
in high school, and I ama hairstylist and I love what I do,
and I love to craft and anythingkind of artsy. I believe I
met here in middle school. Iwant to say it was probably it might
(12:03):
have been intermediate. It might havebeen fifth or sixth grade that we met,
so I mean probably over twenty years. For sure. We clicked,
I mean immediately, and I wasbasically just accepted. And then when I
started like coming over and hanging outand meeting all the other sisters, I
(12:24):
mean, everybody just treated me likea sister. We grew up in a
house of girls, so growing up, our relationship was sometimes strained, but
I would say overall we were veryvery close, closer obviously than the rest
of the girls that we lived with, because we were biological sisters amongst our
adopted sisters. So I mean,yeah, we had our ups and downs,
(12:48):
but overall our relationship was very solid. I don't know exactly how many
sisters we have. I like tosay that I have thirteen sisters because those
are the ones that I remember growingup with the most in life. So
whenever I count them, I countthirteen because those were the ones that I
spent the most of time with whenI was growing up. So in the
(13:09):
family, there were three sets ofbiological sisters who were adopted, Me and
sam and there was a group ofsisters of three, and then another group
of sisters of two. We wereall adopted. The rest of them were
all foster, but I count thefoster because they were there for a long
time. I would say that Samanthawas extroverted. She was very much a
(13:33):
people person, a people pleaser.She liked liked to go out and do
things. Oh yeah, she wasalways out and about. Wanted to get
out to see friends, wanted toWe walked everywhere because we didn't have our
driver's license yet, so I meanwe we'd just go everywhere. When she
was younger, before she went missing, she was super outgoing, super energetic.
(13:58):
She was happy and laughing and liketo make jokes and be sarcastic,
which like I still am now.I think it runs in the family.
She loved animals. We had alot of animals. I feel like I
can't even count how many animals wehad while we were growing up, and
(14:20):
they were all hers except maybe one. And she loved music. She had
a ton of CDs that I gotafter she went missing, and had a
very eclectic taste in music. Shewas very silly, very goofy, very
She had a very goofy sense ofhumor, and she loved to hang out
(14:45):
with friends and have fun. Andshe was just a little weirdo she was.
I mean, goofy is the bestway I can describe her. She
would make weird faces all the timejust to try and make anybody laugh.
She would. She was also verykind and if she loved you, you
knew it. She showed it,and she would do things for you absolutely,
(15:09):
and she was just one of akind. I've never met another Sam
for sure. Well real quick,let's also be real. She was a
little Hellian. Sometimes. She likedto torture the crap out of me.
She thought it was like the bestthing, just if she could make me
scream because she was picking on me. It was like it made her day.
(15:31):
But now looking back at it,I love that it was little sister
of picking on me because I wasthe smaller one. She has been missing
for nineteen years as of October twelfth. I can't think of anybody who would
want to hurt her. I meanwe, like I said, I grew
up in kind of an interesting dynamic. We were the foster kids and then
(15:56):
adopted, and I mean we learnedto adapt to people pretty well. She
was very good at blending in andlike I said, people pleasing. And
I can't think of anybody who wouldwant to physically harm her. Yeah,
I can't think of anybody either,not that I remember now. I don't
think she would back down from afight, for sure, because she could,
you know, get in and withthe best of them if she needed.
(16:18):
I've seen her fight her own sistersstill, But I can't think of
any enemies. You know, withteenage girls, there's plenty. You know
that you don't like somebody or whatever, but usually it's just drama. And
it didn't mean anything. When shewent missing, she was sixteen. I
(16:41):
do not remember what she was wearingfor the life of me. I have
tried, just like I can't rememberhow she got to my house before she
went missing. So basically the storyis that she was angry we were living
or she was living with my grandparentsand was angry about something and came to
(17:03):
my house. I was living withmy boyfriend and she came. I can't
remember how she got there, shejust I just remember she showed up at
the door and was upset. Andwhile she was there, my grandparents informed
me that they had reported her asa runaway and having been in the system.
I know what that entails. Itmeans that my boyfriend's mom could get
(17:26):
in trouble because she knew that shewas there and was keeping her there.
So I told her she had toleave, because you know, I didn't
want them to get in trouble.It was like, just go back and
you know, we'll figure something out. But right now they've already reported you.
You have to go back and then, you know, we'll figure this
out. And she left upset,and I never heard from her again as
(17:47):
far as as far as we knowthat the last time that she was seen
there is a report from my grandparents. They reported to the police that they
thought that she had come back tothe house in the days following her leaving,
and they said that there were somechairs arranged in the backyard in a
(18:10):
circle like she had had people there. There were cigarettes in the middle.
She was smoking at the time,so it looked like she had been there
with some friends and maybe just couldn'tcouldn't get in. I don't know,
they were hanging out. The policetold my grandparents to change the locks on
the house, probably in an attemptto, you know, get her to
want to come home. You know, if she can't access her stuff,
(18:33):
she's just gonna knock on the door. Right. No, that didn't happen,
And that is officially the last timewe know that she was suspected to
have been somewhere. We've had peopletell us that they have seen her,
but you know, you never know. You don't know what's true what's not,
(18:56):
and it's up in the air,and just you know, we haven't
got many leads over the many years. And supposedly she went and stayed the
night somewhere after she saw Kendall becauseshe didn't want to go back home.
But they said they didn't know howshe got there. They said they didn't
(19:18):
know how she left and where shewent. And then somebody else said that
they had gone with her, andshe had left with somebody else, and
that other person came back, butshe didn't come back and she never saw
her again. So it's you know, I don't know if it's helpful or
if it's not, or if it'sjust confusing. You know, it's very
(19:40):
frustrating when you have somebody come forwardafter nineteen well I guess at the time
that we found out eighteen years tosay that they knew that they had seen
her after she was officially reported missing, and to say that that when she
saw her last that she left undersuspicious circumstances. And I can't go into
(20:02):
more detail because we're still running itdown, but it is very it's very
frustrating. It's frustrating because it's beenso long, but it's also frustrating because
it could be it could be false. I want to say, it could
be bullshit, but I don't knowif you could put that on your podcast.
I'm sorry. I mean, itcould it could be totally it could
(20:22):
be made up for attention. Youknow, there are people out there who
have tried to come forward on herFacebook page saying, you know, they
know where she is, and thatturned out to be fake. They were
just you know, out to yeah, and that you know, that's always
annoying, but I mean we dohave to follow up on everything that we
hear. So maybe maybe this's areally annoying till turn out to be,
(20:45):
you know, the one thing thatactually helps us. It was typical for
her to leave sometimes. I wouldn'tsay she necessarily ran away. She would
be gone for a few hours ata time. Our mom would make me
go look for her, make meand Vanessa go look for her, even
at nine and ten o'clock at night. And at one point we got a
(21:07):
ticket because we were out after curfewlooking for her. It was a whole
thing. But yeah, she wouldnever leave for more than a few hours
at a time. I can't evenremember a time where she was gone for
more than a day. But whenshe was gone, she would always call
me, like she would call thehouse and just let me know that you
know that she would be back.She was like, I just need to
(21:30):
cool down. Yeah, I rememberwhen we went and looked for the cops
didn't even believe us when they pulledup and they called Betty to come get
(21:51):
us, and that was the girl'sadopted mom, and we told him,
look, she told us to golook for our sister, and that's what
we were doing. That's why wewere out, and of course you know
she was denied, deny and deny, but you know, nobody believed us
because you know, teenagers werebody lyinganyway, probably what they were thinking.
But yeah, I mean, thegood thing was that she wanted to cool
(22:15):
down. She didn't want to becometoo angry, you know, with someone,
and she would she would walk,she would leave, she would call
somebody to come get her, whetherit be a boy or another friend or
something. But I don't ever rememberher being gone for a very long time.
And she would always call Kendall becauseKendall was her rock. She didn't
(22:38):
want to be without Kendall. Shedidn't want to live without Kendall. I
mean, anytime that Kendall moved oranything, she would try to follow her
and try to be with her.So I know it was very hard on
Sam when Kendall moved out and shecouldn't live with her, and it was
just a Lushit was going on allat the same time, when all this
(22:59):
was happening in Sam's life, andit just I think it all kind of
came crashing down, and maybe that'sone reason why she left, because it
was just too much to handle atthe moment before Sam had moved in with
Kendall in the grandparents' house. Shehad lived with their aunt after Betty had
kicked all the girls out of thehouse. That's a whole another part of
(23:22):
the story. But she had stolenthe aunt's car and the aunt press charges,
so she couldn't live with their auntanymore. So she moved in with
Kendall at the grandparents' house. Andit was a lot of boy obsession going
on. She was I can't rememberif she was dating the same guy,
(23:45):
but we have her agenda, herschool agenda, and she had his name
roteal lover it and how she lovedhim, and then there was also a
couple other guys' names, and youknow, all sorts of stuff. She
was boy crazy, and then justnot being with all her sisters and not
being in the same way she grewup for so long. I think it
really impacted her because it was sucha huge change. And she went from
(24:08):
somewhere that had a mom that waspretty disabled who couldn't get upstairs and check
and see if they had done anychores or anything like that, to a
house that had a lot more structureand rules. And she sure has held
him like that, So I meanjust everything was fully changing. And then
when Kendall moved out, she reallydidn't like that because, like I said,
(24:30):
Kendall, you know, was herglue that held her together. So
the only thing that I can reallyadd is that when she went missing,
it was roughly two months after Ihad moved out of my grandparents' house,
so that also added to her stress. If there was anything that initiated it
(24:52):
her going missing, I mean reallyjust accumulation of everything I talked about and
just probably her feeling pressure to Likeyou can tell in her agenda, she
wanted to be better, she wantedto do better, and by that I
mean, like I feel like almostit looked like she was trying to get
(25:17):
her life together in a way,like she was trying to be more organized,
and she was trying to do betterwith school. And then she would
even write like about her being excitedto go to church or anything like that,
and I feel like maybe she wastrying in a way, but I
think she was having trouble with thatbecause she was a little bit of a
(25:38):
bad girl. She was a littlebit of a rebel, and she definitely
bucked up against authority that or anythingthat she really didn't care for. I
mean, that's how a lot ofteenagers are, but sometimes she took it
to the next level for sure.But I mean she didn't have the easiest
childhood. She already had. I'msure PTSD, I'm sure trauma. You
(26:03):
know, I don't know if Samremembered how it was when they were little,
before they were adopted, or anythinglike that. I think Kendall still
has some memories, but you know, she I don't know if she fully
knew how to deal with anything thatcame at her besides runaway. You know,
I don't know if she had toolsto deal with it. I think
that she was living a life thatwas overwhelming. And I also think that
(26:30):
her being bipolar played a lot into, you know, the choices that she
made in the way that she feltabout things. She felt in extremes,
she was either really really happy andreally high, or she was really really
low and I had to get herdressed for the day to go to school.
I mean, there's a lot thatI don't remember about that time,
Like it comes back in bits andpieces. Sometimes something will will trigger a
(26:52):
memory. But you know, asyou I'm thirty six now, so I
mean, as you get older,like you fill up those spaces with us
stuff, and so I remember likethe main things that I have considered important
over the years about you know,how she was at the time, and
you know, the way that Iremember her and the way that I remember
the events leading up to and followingher going missing, but the specific things,
(27:19):
like I said her, h howshe got to my house, which
was twenty plus minutes in a carfrom where my grandparents' house was, or
what she was wearing or anything likeit, whether or not she had a
cell phone. Like I'm pretty certainthat she didn't, because like I feel
(27:40):
like my grandparents said that they calledthe house at one point to find out
if she was there, So Ifeel like at the time she didn't have
a cell phone. But again,like that's just speculation based on the stuff
that I've heard. I don't rememberspecifically a lot of things that I wish
I did. If that's one thingthat I can tell people is start writing
down the things that you know aboutthe people that you love. I mean,
(28:04):
that's that's a really good thing aboutsocial media now too. I wish
that we had had social media backyou know, when I was seventeen when
she went missing at sixteen, becausewe would know a lot more. We
would probably know what she was wearingthat day, because everybody boasts everything every
day. I wish that we'd hadthat kind of documentation. I mean,
we barely had MySpace. I thinkKendall and I asked each other. Probably
(28:29):
we've done it probably at least likefricking ten times now, either I text
her or she texts me, andwe ask each other the same question,
did Sam have MySpace? And we'reboth like, I don't. I don't
fucking remember. I actually recently loggedinto my old MySpace account because you can
access your legacy accounts as well aslooking at all of the people that I
have had friends on MySpace, andI was looking at those people to see
(28:52):
if they have friends in common withSam, and so, like I actually
have a spreadsheets. It's terrifying.I went down a deep, dark rabbit
hole. I mean, it's allthat I can do is to continue to
I mean I can search online foranything, Like I said, I have
my master's in information technology, soI mean I do a lot of searching
(29:15):
online. I do image searches andthings like that. But I mean that's
literally all I can do. It'sstill an open case, so I can't
get any information from her file,which I could probably help on if I
knew what was in there, butI can't. I mean, I've done
an open records request, so Ihave some like a very small amount of
(29:37):
information of what's in the file.They could They sent me like a two
page overview about the case, butthat's it. Yeah, And that was
when it was. Was it whenit was reopened the second time or just
the first investigation? It was whenit was reopened, Yeah, and it
closed I think in twenty fifteen thattime. Yeah, it was at the
Attorney General's office when I requested therecords request, and then they sent it
(30:02):
back to Burla's ANDMPD. And that'swhen when lou Berry the volunteer is helping
Burla's ANDPD. He actually got onthe case to assist, so he has
access. But again he doesn't havemy brain and my knowledge about everything that
happened. I guess it's a complicatedsituation, Like he even has to send
(30:22):
me messages sometimes like who was thisperson? Again? I knew for a
fact that she was missing when Ihadn't heard from her in twenty four hours.
The following day, I called mygrandparents and told him that something was
really really wrong. I said,she's not at the house right, and
they're like, no, we haven'tseen her, so well, I haven't
heard from her, so you know, we need to escalate this further,
(30:45):
like this isn't just a runaway thing. I think I called the grandparents' house.
I either called the house or theycalled my parents' house. I can't
remember which one it was, butI remember them asking me have you seen
Sam? And I said, knowwhy? And they said, she's run
away. And I remember just Iwas sitting on the floor because you know,
(31:07):
for some reason, all kids siton the floor. I don't know
why we do that. And Ihad the phone in my ear, and
I just remember handing the phone tomy mom. My mom was sitting on
the couch and I just threw myface into the seat of the couch and
I started crying, and my momwas like, what the fuck is going
on? Mom's from New York,so every other words, curseword. And
she gets on the phone and shestarts talking to the grandparents, and my
(31:32):
mom's like, no, no,nobody's seen her. Nobody's talked to her,
we don't know, we don't knowanything. How long has it been
going on? Stuff like that.And then I remember Kendall came up to
my parents' work, and because myparents owned their own business, and she
talked to them about it. AndI remember making missing flyers with my mom
and it was either me and mymom or me and Kendall that went to
(31:55):
like parking lots and put it undercar windshield wipers and stuff. I don't
want a dog on law enforcement becausethey have a hard job, but in
this case, I feel like myexperience has been that law enforcement gets involved
or another investigator whoever gets involved,and they run through the case. They
(32:22):
try they interview the same people thathave already been interviewed that that they suspect
could know something, They find outthat they have nothing, and then it
gets passed on to the next investigatora year to two years later, like,
there hasn't been any I don't knowaha moment, there hasn't been any
new evidence. Basically, the onlynew information that has come through has been
(32:45):
from somebody submitting information directly to me. I absolutely feel like at some point
one of the investigators on her caseshould have run through the list of contacts
that were in her journal or inher phone book and in her agenda from
(33:05):
school, because she had phone numbersfor multiple people, probably fifty. I
feel like they at least should havecontacted those people to find out if they
knew anything. And if they didn'tdo that, then I still feel like
it would be worth trying to donow. I mean, I have tried
to track down people. It's hardfor me because I don't have all the
(33:28):
tech, but some people don't goby the same names. It's the whole
thing. I have found a fewand reached out to them to noa bill.
And I also think that it's differentwhen it's coming from law enforcement.
They don't necessarily have to take meseriously. So yeah, I mean,
I would like to see them putin some work to talk to the people
(33:53):
that we know that she was hangingout with at the time, and nobody
has told me. Nobody has toldme that that's something that they have done.
And there have been four investigators thatI have dealt with specifically, because
they always reach out to me firstto find out what I know, and
then it's like the same cycle overand like I know exactly what to expect
(34:15):
next, how long to wait forthe next phone call? Who they're going
to ask me about? It's thesame process over and over and over.
Yes, absolutely, Like I wanteyes on her case. I want whoever
wants to work on her case towork on the case. But I want
them to actually work the case andnot just work the same leads that other
detectives before them have been working on. Anybody, And everybody sees the word
(34:38):
run away and thinks, oh,well, she wanted to leave, so
why bother looking for Well, shewas sixteen, She wasn't. She wasn't
seventeen, she wasn't eighteen. Shewasn't a full adult. She was a
child. She had no idea howto live on her own, how to
function in society, you know,how to do the basic you know,
survival guide of life. And shedefinitely did give in a peer pressure,
(35:04):
and you know, she was definitelymore of a follower than a leader,
and she would definitely I could seeher just going along with whatever and getting
into a terrible situation. And Ifeel like, even if it's a runaway,
it needs to be serious because it'swild, no matter what, no
(35:27):
matter who gives a shit, ifthey chose to leave. I don't care
if it's my child, I wantthem back. I don't give a shit
if they chose to leave on theirown accord. They don't know what they
want their children. And it's likeKendall said, it's like recycled the same
shit over and over and over again. They say, oh, well,
this is what the last person found, so let's see if I can look
(35:47):
up the same shit and dig somethingnew up. And that the definition of
crazy doing the same thing, andyou know, getting the same outcome and
doing it over and over and expectingsomething different. It's not going to happen.
It's not going to work. Andwe know it's hard because there's I
mean nothing, We have no ideaabout anything or anyone. And that's the
hardest part. And we're not sayingthey didn't give any effort. You know,
(36:13):
obviously they did. We've had,you know, like Kendall said,
the report that she got from theAttorney General and it was two pages,
and I think that shit was openfor several years and it most of it.
I mean, me and Ketl havesat down and gone through it and
I've gone asked her, Okay,what about this, who's this what about
(36:34):
this, And she's like, Ithink all of that shit's bullshit anyway,
and it sounds like bullshit in thosereports, and it's just, you know,
kind of like you're the police.You should be able to get more
information than we can, and rightnow we feel like we've been finding out
more information than anyone else. Soit's it's very like, what the hell
(37:00):
y'all doing kind of thing, youknow, you know, it's the law
enforcement. You know, we're notasking you to move mountains. We're just
asking you to use your role inyour position to you know, make phone
calls on our behalf based on,you know, the information that we have
provided to you. We're already investigating, we're already helping. We want to
help. But when we give information, all we want is all we expect
(37:24):
is for you to make a phonecall or you know, to look something
up in whatever tools that you have. We just want you to do something
based on the information that we findis important. Because we we live this
life and when we see something thatwe think is important, it's probably important,
and it's not probably important, itis important, and something needs to
(37:45):
be done because right now what's happeningfeels like nothing when she went missing,
she was five' five, betweenone hundred and ten and one hundred and
twenty pounds, and she was ingood health. She, like I said,
was bipolar, and at the timethat she went missing, she wasn't
on medication. She had been offof it for about a year probably,
(38:10):
but she was coping well like shelike I said, she was a typical
teenager with typical teenager feelings. Andthe main thing that I can say about
her health or whatever at the timeis that, as most people with bipolar
have, she had her ups andshe had downs. When she was up,
(38:31):
she was super up and could bethat way for weeks at a time,
and when she was down, shewas really really down. Like I
can remember many times having to tryto wake her up and having to dress
her and while she's passed out inbed, pulling her to the car so
that we could go to school.Luckily those were less than the ups.
(38:57):
But so yeah, I mean,she was she was an overall good health.
I can't think of anything really thatwas going on other than other than
the fact that you know, shehad her downs sometimes. I wouldn't say
that she had a problem with drugsand alcohol, but I can't say,
because again she's bipolar, she wouldhave experimented with drugs and alcohol in order
(39:20):
to substitute her medication, because that'swhat people with bipolar disorder do. They
quit their meds and then they youknow, do drugs. To my knowledge,
Vanessa and I are the only oneswho have advocated for her in any
way. There have never been anyAmber alerts for her. When we post
(39:44):
things online, some of the familywill like and share that information, but
nobody other than Vanessa and I hasactually initiated any kind of search for her.
It's frustrating. This is always sohard for me. I guess the
main theory that the only plausible theoryreally that I can think of, is
(40:06):
that if she actually ran away anddecided to stay away. So we know
that initially she ran away because shewas a runaway, but then after twenty
four hours, in my mind,she was officially missing. So in the
event that she was actually a runawaydecided to stay away, I feel like
she might have I don't know,fallen into sex work or you know,
(40:34):
something where she could stay off thegrid. Because her social has never been
used. I mean, she knowsmostly how to take care of herself,
and like I said, she knowshow to be a chameleon. She's a
people pleaser and knows how to blendin. But she's also very gullible and
very impressionable. So I don't know. I mean, that's one of many
(40:58):
theories. It seems like that couldbe something that she would have done,
But as far as suspects, Ican't. I can't think of of anybody
that I that I would think thatI know personally would have any information that
they wouldn't have told me or hadany involvement. I mean, I wish
(41:20):
that I had known more of herfriends at the time, Like obviously I
would have met them in passing andstuff, but like I didn't, I
wasn't hanging out with her and herfriends, so like I don't know as
much about them as as I wouldhave liked to. So I'm not sure
if if one of them, youknow, might know something or or might
have wanted to do arm to her. But I mean, she wasn't the
(41:44):
type of personality just to piss peopleoff to the point where they want to
hurt her, you know, Likeshe was. She was above all a
people bleaser. She would put headswith people but in the end, if
she had to in order to makethem, she would agree with them.
(42:10):
I agree with Kendall with just thetheory that she could be in sex work,
because we know that her such securityhas never been run. And you
know, what's the oldest profession isprostitution. And what can you do to
make damn good money and not haveto ever have record of it? Prostitution?
(42:34):
Could I see her doing that,yes, because I know she was
sexually active back then when she wasyoung. And now I see, you
know, fourteen fifteen, sixteen yearolds and they look like babies, and
I can't believe we were doing shitlike that when we were that age.
But you know, that's how itis. You think you're grown, you
do grown things. And I knowshe was smoking weed, I know she
(42:57):
was drinking, and I know shetold me she wants to experiment with other
things. So I mean, usuallysex work goes hand in hand with some
sort of drug, especially when youhave to do a lot of things you
don't want to do. Absolutely doI want that life for her. Absolutely
not. I want her to beliving a good life and be happy,
(43:19):
be a vetech or a veterinarian andhave lots of dogs and cats and have
a family. But could that bereality? Yes? But do I think
that is one hundred percent her reality? No? But I also don't.
I don't feel like she's dead.I don't know why either, but I
(43:39):
don't. It's just hard to explain. It's a feeling that I have.
I feel like Kendall has that samefeeling where we feel like if if she
were dead, I feel like wewould feel something or nothing, you know
what I mean, it would bedifferent than what we feel now. But
I mean we've had people tell uslike, what if she's in witness protection
(44:01):
and what if you know she somebodytook her, and you know, all
of that can absolutely be a possibility. But it's just up in the air.
And I mean, she could havebeen caught up at the wrong crowd,
wrong place, wrong time. Youknow, absolutely there's predators everywhere.
(44:21):
There's terrible people everywhere. She couldeasily become a victim. But you know,
I prefer not to think that way, but that also can be reality.
So you have to be realistic.You know, you don't have a
choice. She absolutely could have beensex trafficked. I mean, the most
unsuspecting people get sex trafficked. Soin her situation and being as gullible and
(44:42):
young and pliable as she was,she definitely could have fallen into that.
I sure as hell hope not,because that's terrible. My running theory is
that, my happy theory, youknow, because I have to stay in
my happy place, is that sheactually did run away and didn't want to
have anything to do with this anymore, because she was pissed at me for
(45:07):
leaving and I was gonna make hergo back to where she didn't want to
go. So she found some richguy and ran off with him, and
she just doesn't have to worry aboutanything anymore. She does I have to
use her socials. She's living acushy live and she's just fine. Mm
hmmm. That's stranger. Things havehappened, right, And she could also
change your identity, change her name. Who knows. One thing that I
(45:28):
want people to remember about her isthat she is a person, and that
I want her back. I don'tnecessarily have to see her again. I
just want, I really want toknow whether or not she's okay. If
she did leave of her own accordand doesn't want to have anything to do
(45:49):
with us. I am one hundredpercent okay with that, I completely understand.
It sucks. I'll get over it, but it won't be this.
I won't be wondering every day passingpeople on the street and turning my car
around because they looked like her.You know, I'll at least have some
comfort knowing whether or not she isactually okay. I want people to know
(46:15):
that she is loved, she ismissed, and though she's not perfect,
which no one is by any means, and she's made mistakes just like we
all have, that she is alwayswelcome wherever we are, we will welcome
her with open arms. And thatshe I mean missed isn't even enough of
(46:40):
a word. It's a void thatit's created in both of us, especially
Kendall for sure, and it hurtsme to see her in pain from it.
And we want that feeling back thatshe gave us, because she really
did make an impact, even thoughyou know, sometimes she was you know,
(47:06):
a shittheit, but she indeed,yeah, she knows it's true,
but you know, she was justa wonderful part of our lives that you
know, you never think you're goingto lose, and when you I mean,
it literally feels like we were holdingher hand walking and then we just
(47:27):
let go for half a second andlike she just disappeared. It feels like
she went poof. And that's thehardest part, because it feels like piece
of a piece of us is gonebecause we were supposed to continue our lives
with her, and we didn't getto do that, and we had to
become different people. I feel becausewe didn't have her with us, you
know, I think it putshs almoston different paths, and that you know,
(47:52):
we just want more than just herback, if that makes sense.
If I finally reunited with my sister, I feel like I would just feel
calm, which is something I haven'thad it a long time. I don't
know if I would feel calm.I think I would damn near knocker over
the moment I saw I think Iwould run at her like I was a
(48:15):
bowling ball getting ready to knock downsome pins, and I'd probably tackle her
ass and just like roll up onher because I'd say, don't go anywhere.
You're not allowed to go anywhere anymore. What the fuck? Probably is
what I would do, because I'vehad dreams about it. I've had different
dreams and every dream that I haveseen her. I've tried to run at
(48:39):
her or tackle her in some formof fashion. And I'm not violent or
you know, like physical like thatever, but that's what I want to
do because I feel like I wantto make sure it's real. You know,
you touch them, you know,that's the thing that right, And
I think I would just scream,you know, and then it probably i'd
(49:00):
feel calm, like Kendall said,Kendall's a lot more you know, chill,
But I think I would just losemy fucking mind. And I think
Kendall would be too, but itmight take her a minute to get that
reaction. Yeah, I think I'veI've lived in I guess like a state
of stress for so long that thatI think if if I was reunited with
(49:23):
her, I feel like I couldfinally just take a breath, Like I
could stop, you know, thewheels that are constantly running in my head
all of the uh, right,I could finally stop wondering. I mean,
obviously I would freak out because I'mme, but I mean mostly I
(49:43):
feel like I would finally have somesense of normalcy in my life because,
you know, on top of theday today, craziness that goes on in
everybody's lives. We now have thisthat never goes away. This is a
stress and an anxiety and a dailyconcern that never stops. Sam has been
(50:04):
missing for nineteen years as of Octobertwelfth of this year. She was sixteen
when she went missing, and shewas listed as a runaway almost the entire
time. As far as I cantell. The only time that she was
finally upgraded to missing was last yearand twenty twenty two she would have been
(50:29):
upgraded to missing. And the thingthat I want people that are listening to
take away from this and to doafter this is to talk about her to
anybody who will listen. And Icannot make this up. A friend of
mine at work got on an airplaneand she had listened to the podcast the
week before. She got on anairplane, and the person who was sitting
(50:52):
next to her knew about the storylike she had listened to the same podcast.
And so like that's you just younever know who who is going to
who you're going to run into thatmight have heard the same thing, or
who hasn't heard it, who mightknow something, who can shed some light
on the situation. You never know. She could be literally anywhere. So
(51:15):
whoever you can tell it to,whoever you could share it with. I
don't care if you have five friendsor one hundred thousand friends, share it
with whoever you can. Her nameis not out there nearly as much as
it needs to be, and Ireally really want that for her. I
think because she was listed as runaway, there was no Amber alert, there
(51:35):
was no hell. I don't evenknow if we had Amber alerts back then.
It was so long ago. Ican't remember when that amber that case
happened. But there was no mediaattention. There was. I don't even
think there was anything in the newspaper. I don't think no. I've had
people reach out to me and tellme that they've lived there all their lives,
even went to school with her,and they had no idea that she
(51:58):
was missing. And any missing caseyou hear about it even I've even seen
full YouTube videos about the tiniest tiniestcases, and I've heard I don't know
how many cases that are so similarthat Sam's. I'm like, hold up
a minute, who is this?What are they saying? And then I'm
like, oh shit, it's notSam, But it sounds exactly freaking like
(52:20):
it, and it's I think oneof the biggest things was because there was
not a lot of attention on itin the beginning, when it's the most
fresh, that it really kind ofscrewed it because that is the most important
time, because everybody still remembers everything, and now it's been so long it's
hard. So yes, talk abouther. She loved her nickname Sam,
(52:45):
but she hated her nickname Samuel,So if you want, you can call
her Samuel, because if anything,that might aggravate her ass enough to maybe
send somebody a message and go,what the fuck are y'all doing? Agree,
she hated that shit, And wethink it's hilarious. We do think
it's hilarious. We did. Iused to. I used to call her
(53:07):
Samuel all the time, just toget under her skin. Yeah, so
come on, Samuel, where wereyou at? Tell us just tell us
you're still breathing. That's all weneed. So I want to go ahead
and address and highlight a few thingsreal fast. Over the years, there's
been some mysterious incidents suggesting that Sam'sstill alive, such as unexplained cigarette butts
(53:29):
and rearranged furniture found in her grandparents'backyard shortly after her disappearance. Despite Kendale's
relentless efforts, the case remained classifiedas a quote unquote endangered runaway. Kendale,
along with a private investigator and acase advocate, continues to search for
Sam to this day, following leadsand even going as far as to keep
(53:51):
the same phone number that Sam lastremembered and hopes that her sister might contact
her. And while they just barelymade it to where they got the case
classification and changed to missing person,they still want to garner more attention and
support for finding her sister, whowould now be in her mid thirties.
Anyone with information about Samantha Taps whereaboutsare encouraged to contact any of the following
(54:15):
The Burrows And Police Department at eightone seven four two six nine to nine
zero three, the Texas Department ofPublic Safety Missing Person's Clearinghouse at five one
two four two four five zero sevenfour, or Private Investigations for the Missing
(54:37):
at eight six six three three onesix six six zero or pif T M
tips tips at gmail dot com.We will be sure to include this in
the episode notes. We want tourge anyone with any information to hit up
(54:57):
the links in the phone number thatAmanda just shared. Please take a look
at the show notes for more sourcesand information. We really want to reiterate
that this is an ongoing investigation andwe do not know whether Samantha Tap is
actually living or deceased, but weare hoping, with the help of you
all as citizens, that some kindof resolution will take place. This is
a heartbreaking and confusing time for anyoneto have to endure, so if there's
(55:22):
any chance of some kind of positiveoutcome, we will absolutely take that chance.
Please think about what you all woulddo had this been one of your
loved ones. You certainly wouldn't giveup. Even on the days where it's
tempting to think the worst. Youcan't afford that kind of thought process if
you want to keep your head sosober enough to pick up the fine details
and any investigation and sam on theslim chance that you yourself are listening,
(55:47):
we're respectfully asking that you reach outin some way at least let your family
and your closest friends know in someway, in any way that you're okay.
They are seeking any sign that theycan be it from heaven or Earth.
Just to know that you are alive. They might feel it in their
gut, but the closure and peacethey so desperately want and need is and
(56:07):
of itself heart shattering, and Ican only empathize with them fully. To
lose anyone you love dearly and nothave any idea what's going on and even
how they are doing, is jarringin a nightmare that one can only hope
to wake up from with some kindof positive resolution. Is like walking blind
in a dark alley way with noflashlight. Nobody's helping you. You're searching
(56:30):
for lack of a better term,most prized possession, or like someone had
dropped your wedding ring, and whatappears to be quickstand. You know there's
a chance, albeit slim, youcould find it, but you have to
rely on any tool within grasp tohelp you. You know it's around,
but in order to find it,you have to rely on all of your
(56:50):
senses to garner proper clues as towhere it could be. It's frustrating.
So please, if you are listening, or if anyone of you you listening
knows of Sam's whereabouts, please puta few lovely ladies' minds at ease and
hearts at rest because they are aswell as Samantha tab strong, resilient,
(57:12):
but vulnerable. Because sam was labeledas such as a quote unquote endangered runaway,
we are hoping that this episode canpossibly get her attention if she's still
alive, and hopefully reunite this beewith her hive. We must protect bees
at all costs, for without bees, we as a human race cannot survive
(57:32):
and thrive in life. So bevigilant for when you mess with the bees,
you get the hive. Thank youfor listening to a Nefarious Nightmare.
The music used in the theme wasoriginally by ghost Stories Incorporated remixed by Ryan
(57:55):
RCX Murphy. Additional background music isprovided by Epidemic Sound. A Nefarious Nightmare
is scripted, researched, and producedby Courtney Fenner and Amanda Cronin. I'm
Lany Hobbes and as always, bevigilant for when you mess with the bees,
you get the hive.