August 13, 2024 • 60 mins
Imagine enduring bullying, chronic illness, domestic violence, and the challenges of raising children with disabilities. In this moving episode, author Rev. Tanya Nemley, a 72-year-old dedicated minister, shares her extraordinary journey of overcoming childhood trauma and adversity with the unwavering support of God's presence. She reveals how scripture and divine strength have been her anchors through life’s toughest battles and offers profound insights into how understanding God's support can transform our view of challenges. Learn how combining spiritual wisdom with professional help can pave the way to healing. Tune in for heartfelt advice, encouragement, and a moving prayer for those in need.
CONTENT WARNING: This episode includes discussions on sensitive topics such as childhood trauma, domestic violence, and mental health struggles. Listener discretion is advised.
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Explore Tanya’s blog for more inspiration and resources: godspeaks-i-listen.com
Visit her on Instagram or Facebook
✨NEW HERE? ✨ Meet Jemese LaChel Drewery, LCSW, CCTP - Spirit-filled trauma expert and host of A New Creation Podcast. Through Christ-centered conversations and inspiring testimonies, Jemese guides women to healing, deeper faith, and freedom in Jesus Christ.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
And I'm 72 years old right now and I've been through
all these disastrous things andwhen I look back, I think about
how God healed me of cancer, howGod healed my children that
were in the NICU All four ofthem was in the NICU.
I think about my daughter whowas born, still born, still born
(00:20):
, and I prayed there on thattable in the delivery room and I
said God, please don't let mychild die, Please don't let my
baby die.
And after about five minutes Iheard a little teeny, weeny cry
and I heard the doctor say we'reokay.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Hey, welcome back to a new creation podcast where we
are pointing women towards avictory in Christ, one Jesus
story at a time.
I'm your host, jamis LachelleDrury.
I'm a Christian traumatherapist.
Let's get right in to today'sepisode, okay, all right.
Well, welcome back to thepodcast.
Friends, I am very excited tointroduce to you the reverend
(01:04):
tanya nemoli.
She's a licensed minister.
She's a mom of six children, agrandmother of two, she's
married to reverend james anemoli and she's an author of
three books.
Tanya can also be seenperforming her ventriloquist act
with her sidekick, miss jay,which sounds so fun and exciting
, at Samantha's Little Bit ofHeaven in East Northport, new
(01:29):
York.
She's been serving the Lord inministry for over 50 years, and
so that is our very official bio, but I want to welcome you here
, tanya, and give you a chanceto tell us a little bit about
yourself in your own way.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Tanya and give you a chance to tell us a little bit
about yourself in your own way.
Well, thank you so much forhaving me.
I really appreciate youallowing me to come on and tell
my story.
Yes, I am a mother of sixchildren.
I have five biological childrenand, if that wasn't enough, I
decided to adopt one, and I'mmarried to Reverend James Nimley
(02:05):
and let's see what else aboutme.
I love the Lord and I just.
My passion is to get as manypeople to go to heaven as
humanly possible that I can dowhile I'm down here on earth.
That is my total purpose forbeing here right now.
(02:26):
I'm grateful that God gave me72 years being, with all the
problems that I've had in mylife, that he honored me with
allowing me to live for 72 years.
I just had a birthday the daybefore yesterday, so I'm just.
I'm grateful.
It's like it's all gravy now.
Every minute that I live isgravy because I look at it as
(02:48):
another opportunity to win asoul for the kingdom.
So I'm all about soul winning,so is my husband, and that's our
whole purpose.
That's what we do.
I've written out over, I'vewritten out my testimony and
I've given it out to over 4 000people so far, and I I just
(03:09):
wrote a few books and I'm hopingthat they will go out into the
vineyard and speak to people'sheart and lead them to lord, to
the lord, because they all havethe salvation message at the end
of the book.
So that's what I'm about is I'mjust trying to get as many
people to um um, to heaven aspossible, and I'm working for
the kingdom of God.
(03:29):
I'm on the clock.
I'm an ambassador for the Lord,and that is my purpose for being
here right now.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Amen, I love that You're about your father's
business.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Absolutely.
I'm on the clock.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Okay.
So my question is uh, how didyou get to this point where you
are so on fire for, sosingle-minded about the father's
business?
Um, in other words, you know,was there?
Did you have a significantmoment where you came to know
Jesus?
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Oh, yes, oh yes, I did.
Well, I accepted the Lord whenI was about 13 years old,
watching Billy Graham on TV, butI didn't, you know, when I
turned 18, you know, 18 yearolds, do we just go out on our
own path and forget about Godfor quite a while until he reels
(04:21):
you back in?
And, believe me, he has hisways of reeling you back in.
Um, my obsession with god camefrom, um, him healing me of, uh,
depression and suicidalideations.
But my problems go back waybefore that.
So, and I just want to talk alittle bit about my childhood
(04:42):
trauma I don't want to dwell onit because I've been talking a
lot about it.
So it's bringing back all thememories but I grew up with
absolutely no love from myparents.
Just absolutely no love, nointeraction with my father at
all.
I mean, he lived in the home,he worked, he was a good
provider, I had a nice house andeverything.
(05:04):
Home he worked, he was a goodprovider, I had a nice house and
everything.
But there was no interaction,which really hurt me to the core
of my heart.
And my mother she also didn'tjust seem to be disgusted with
me.
I just could never do anythingright, and I think what led to
that is my mother and father hadtheir own baggage in their
lives from their growing up.
And I think what led to that ismy mother and father had their
(05:25):
own baggage in their lives fromtheir growing up.
And then they look after theygot married they lost the child.
He was two years old.
He died from complications ofcerebral palsy.
So when my sister came alongfive years after I was born she
was sickly also and was in andout of the hospital and
intensive care.
(05:46):
So I just kind of got left bythe wayside and, being that I
didn't do good in school becauseI had a learning disability and
the teachers told my parentsthat I was smart but I was lazy.
So that just added fuel on thefire to them not liking me.
And then I was bullied inschool really bad.
(06:06):
So it seems like I could neverdo anything to please my parents
or get their attention.
So by the time I was 12 yearsold I just said forget this
world.
God made a mistake when he mademe.
He made people with the blindand no legs, so he made me with
no brain.
So I must be a mistake.
(06:28):
So one night I decided to takemy life at 12 years old and I
took a whole bunch of my allergypills and I was so my heart was
in so much pain.
I went downstairs in myparents' room.
They were sleeping, it was lateat night and they woke up and I
told them what I did and I wascrying and they told me to go in
(06:50):
my room that it was between meand God.
I remember that from growing upand them telling me that, and
then me growing up and justremembering that that's what
they said is between me and God.
So I crippled along in my life.
I managed to graduate schooland then I jumped into
(07:15):
relationships with men that Ihad no business doing, because I
was looking for somebody tolove me, to just give me some
self-worth or something, and soI made a lot of mistakes and
then, at 19, I married a manthat I barely knew and the first
week it was domestic violenceall the way through four years
(07:38):
of marriage with him, and then Igot out of that marriage and I
married another man, which is mypresent husband, but I didn't
know he was an alcoholic when Ifirst married him.
Long story short, he became aminister, gave up the alcohol
and he was a very patient,patient man with me through the
(07:58):
baggage that I brought into themarriage.
I brought so much baggage frommy parents to the divorce and
being a domestic violencesurvivor and I bought all that
to the marriage.
But my present husband was verypatient with me.
So I still was suicidal all thetime.
(08:20):
And to make another long storyshort because it's very long,
because I want to get to how Godbrought me through this One day
I was in my thirties I had hadthree children.
Two of them were in school andthe third one was a toddler.
So she was in her crib and Iwas so depressed that day I went
(08:42):
to the kitchen, put her in acrib, put her to sleep.
And I was so depressed that dayI went to the kitchen, put her
in a crib, put her to sleep andwent down in the kitchen and got
a knife and turned it backwardsand was sticking it in my chest
when all of a sudden I heard mydaughter pulling on my dress,
going mommy, mommy, and Idropped the knife and picked her
up and I just cried and Icalled my husband at work.
(09:03):
He came home, I said I got toget help and I signed myself
into a mental institution thathelped a little bit with the
situation with my parents.
So I got that straightened out,that it wasn't me, it was them
and I told them everything Iever wanted to tell them about
it, to their shock and then, westarted the process of
(09:29):
restoration with my relationshipwith them.
So I had to forgive them, whichwas hard.
It took a lot of years toforgive them and to get my life
back that I really never had.
So I still was suffering fromdepression after that and one
day I was crying, as I alwayscried, and somebody had given me
(09:53):
a Bible and I never read it,but they gave it to me for a
gift.
So I was so sad this day and Isaid I tried everything.
I was in counseling for years.
I assigned myself into a mentalinstitution.
I'm still depressed.
I know that the next time I trythis suicide thing it's going
(10:14):
to work, because I just couldn'ttake the pain anymore.
So what I did was I got thatBible out and I didn't even know
what to look up.
I got that Bible out and Ididn't even know what to look up
and the Lord led me to I don'tknow how, psalms 86.
And it talked about God, pleasehelp me.
(10:36):
And I cried and I said, god, ifyou don't help me this time you
know, because you have allknowledge that I'm not I'm
really going to be successfulthe next time.
And he didn't really doanything right away, but he
healed me, healed my mind ofdepression in a very unique way.
So somebody had given me adozen roses when I was in the
(10:59):
mental institution silk rosesand I decided to try to make
corsages out of them.
So I started making corsagesand I cut each one up and made
corsages and I sold them all.
And then my neighbor across thestreet asked me to do her
daughter's wedding flowers and Isaid okay, and I didn't know
(11:21):
how to do wedding flowers.
So I went to the craft store,bought some books on how to make
bouquets and all this otherstuff and I did her whole
wedding.
And it was like, where did Iget these skills from?
They just came.
I was always crafty, I sewed andI crocheted, so I just taught
(11:42):
myself how to do it.
And then I just started buyingmore silk flowers and making all
kinds of arrangements.
And I bought teacups and gluedthem together and made
arrangements in the teacups andthen I made larger arrangements
and vases and then my wholehouse, like every room, was just
(12:02):
filled with flowers because Ijust kept making them like a
factory.
Then I said to myself, what amI going to do with all these
flowers?
So my husband and I decidedthat I should sell them at craft
fairs.
So we bought a few shells andwe took all of our kids and we
did all kind of you knowcommunity fairs and we just was
(12:23):
doing them like in thesummertime.
We were doing them like everyweek.
We were doing a craft fairs, andwe just was doing them like in
the summertime, and we weredoing them like every week.
We were doing a craft fair hereand I was selling the flowers,
and then I was doing moreweddings.
And then one day I said tomyself I haven't experienced any
depression.
No sadness.
Depression, no sadness, nocrying.
(12:53):
And I said, oh, my goodness,I'm happy.
I never experienced happinessbefore, ever.
I was happy inside.
I was so happy and I knew thatGod healed me.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And not long after that the Lord had been tapping
on my husband and I's heart togo to church and we were
ignoring him.
And so one day we got a flyerin our fence and it said heaven
to hell, what do you want foryour life?
And I was Lutheran, my husbandwas Catholic and he said he was
going to die Catholic, so hedidn't want to talk about any
(13:25):
other religion.
But this one day we have beengoing through so much that when
that flyer came in the fence Icalled the number up and this
pastor said he would come overmy house.
He came over my house andprayed for my husband and I
invited us to church.
And we went to this church.
He said it was a Pentecostalchurch and I was scared of
(13:47):
Pentecostal churches.
I was like oh my goodness, thesepeople are going to be hanging
off the chandeliers.
And so we said, well, we'll goand sit in the back of the
church.
So we went and we tried to sitin the back of the church but
the pastor saw us and was likethis is a family that came from
our operation saturation, thatwe went through the whole
(14:07):
neighborhood and they ushered usto the front row.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
And.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
I know, and we didn't even know about clapping in
church and moving to music, andso we were like sitting there,
like little pumpkins, our family.
But you know what, when they hadthe altar call at the end, but
you know what, when they had thealtar call at the end, oh my
goodness, my husband and I wentto that altar and we, we were at
church every time the doorsopened, all of us and our kids,
(14:55):
and we became, my husband and I,became committed Christians and
we dedicated the rest of ourlives to working for the Lord
and and I haven't stopped at all, I'm not looking back not look
back, happy in the Lord, nodepression and suicide.
But did all the problems stop inour lives?
Absolutely not.
We continue to have all kindsof problems because just because
(15:20):
you're you uh committedyourself to the Lord doesn't
mean that that's like a a pencileraser and everything's going
to be.
All your suffering is going tobe gone.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
As a matter of fact, it intensifies yeah yeah I think
a lot of times you know we'rewaiting for this magic pill
moment.
You know where, oh,everything's settled and it is
better, it better.
Life with Christ is so muchbetter.
But I think that what I'mhearing you say is that you know
(15:49):
you've experienced the instantdeliverance of he healed your
depression, and you didn't evenknow that he had done that.
No, didn't even know reallyfast move of God.
But then you've alsoexperienced what it looks like
for him to be with you throughthe process of the struggle and
(16:09):
the suffering.
And just because you're you'restruggling does not mean that
God's not with you.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Right, I just wanted.
I want to just end with thethings that I've been through so
that I can get to the thingsthat God has done for me, that I
can get to the things that Godhas done for me Just real quick.
I have been through, like Isaid, bullying by children and
then, as I became an adult, Iwas bullied by adults too.
(16:36):
There is adult bullying Peopledon't know that but it is when
people are mean to you.
I have domestic violence.
I've been sick for most of myentire life.
I've been raped twice.
I have disabled children.
Four of my children were inintensive care when they were
born.
I survived cancer and I alsohave a learning disability and I
(16:57):
have a mystery illness thatI've had over 12,000 episodes of
a mystery illness every day.
So that is all that I have beenthrough and what I'm going
through now, and so what I haveto say about all of this is I've
made this little lineup to tellyou today, and it's I still
(17:18):
have troubles, but troublesdon't have me, God has me now.
I made that up just for you.
I'm going to say it again soyou listeners can hear I still
have troubles, but troublesdon't have me, God has me now.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Amen, yeah, it's a perspective change.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I love that.
It's reminded me of somethingthat my pastor shared um, in the
scriptures, it tells us, youknow, we say often, when the
enemy comes in like a floodgate,god will raise up a standard.
And my pastor had preached how,back in you know the times when
that scripture was written,there wasn't punctuation.
(18:02):
There wasn't things like that.
There's no punctuation.
And so when we open our bibles,we tend to see, when the enemy
comes in like a floodgate, comma.
Then god raises up a standard.
And my pastor was teaching us tosort of have a perspective
shift away from oh, this enemyis the enemy, is the floodgate,
(18:24):
to remembering that our God, ourGod, is the one who raises up a
standard, our God is the onewho holds us, our God is the one
who has the power, our God isthe one.
It's like a mindset shift, arenewing of the mind that we
have to do, you know, in orderto live out to, to, to live out
(18:45):
of faith life.
Otherwise our problems woulddestroy us and cripple us.
But it's like no, I love whatyou said the Lord, he holds you.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Yep, he has me now.
As a matter of fact, I have acharm bracelet and on it, Um, I
have taken.
I have a charm that says taken,because I feel like um Jesus
died for me.
He owns me now and I am takenand God is my father and I'm.
I'm good with it, I'm good withthat.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Yeah, praise the Lord , praise the Lord, I've been.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
I've been searching for love my whole life.
I've been searching for love mywhole life.
I wanted somebody to love meand I have a wonderful husband
who loves me.
We've been married for 48 years.
But you know what I told myhusband?
I said I am so glad that youare not jealous of my
relationship with God, because Iam obsessed with God.
He is the love of my life.
(19:43):
He takes care of me eventhrough the really, really,
really hard times.
There's a song by Kirk Franklincalled Real Love, and I just
love that song because it says Isearched all over and I finally
found my real love.
And so in my life it's Godfirst, and then the love that I
(20:05):
have for my husband, and thenagape love that I have for
everybody else.
That's the order of things.
So I am obsessed with God andI'm going to that's.
What helps me through thetrials is his love.
It's not just me finding abouthis love, but I had to learn how
(20:26):
to love God.
I didn't even know how to lovehim because I didn't have any
experience with love from achild.
So I had to learn how to loveGod and I had to learn that God
loves me.
A lot of people don't understandhow much God loves us.
You know, my husband told mesomething that totally changed
my life.
He preached a sermon one daythat I will never, ever, ever
(20:48):
forget, and he explained to methat the devil was very jealous
when God decided to make humanbeings.
He was very, very jealousbecause he was an angel, and
angels can never be God's child.
But we who accept Jesus Christ,we are God's child.
(21:12):
So when the devil figured outthat God was going to make human
beings and give them anopportunity to be adopted into
his family and be his child, thedevil figured out that God was
going to make human beings andgive them an opportunity to be
adopted into his family and behis child.
The devil was very jealous ofus, and so he has tried to shame
God and making us.
He has tried to keep usseparated from God.
(21:32):
But if we knew how special weare to God, that we are his
children, those who haveaccepted Jesus Christ as their
Lord and Savior.
We are God's child and he hasto take care of us.
He has to because he's ourfather and the way he gave what
(21:52):
he gave us to take care of us,he didn't leave us without any
help.
So I want people to know ifyou're not a Christian, don't
look at us and go.
Oh, they still are suffering.
No, he gave us hope and thishelp and hope is the Holy Bible,
and in the Bible is everythingthat we need to take care of
(22:13):
ourselves.
That he gave us to take care ofus.
You know, my husband preached asermon that I wrote in my book
and it was called, and I wasreally upset when I heard his
title and it was when God'sgrace is not enough.
And so when he told me thetitle of his teaching, I was
like dude, are you crazy?
What do you mean when God'sgrace is not enough?
(22:33):
And he says, wait till you hearthis teaching, wait till you
hear it.
And I trust him because myhusband loves the word, I love
to pray, he loves the word.
So when he taught that teaching, he explained what he meant,
and he meant that when God'sgrace is not enough is when you
(22:55):
don't reach out and take it,because it's available to get us
through this life.
So if we don't hold on to God'sgrace and reach out for it and
trust him, then we're not goingto have that grace.
So that was like a life anotherone of my husband's
life-changing things.
(23:17):
We have to reach out for God'sgrace.
It's ever-flowing,ever-available and when you know
God's word and you trust in Godand you know about his grace,
you are going to make it throughthis life.
And that's how I've made itthrough this life.
So recently I've written a bookand I know that you know I don't
(23:39):
want to just come on here andtry to promote my book, but I
just want to tell you about itbecause the name of the book is
a handbook for survivingsuffering.
In the midst of trouble you canstill have peace and this is my
life.
This is what happened to me.
This is how I have gottenthrough all of the heavy, heavy,
(24:02):
hard card trials.
Now people have trials all thetime.
Trials come and you get sick,you get a cold, you get the flu.
You get over it.
Like I had cancer.
That was a trial.
The doctor says we're going tohandle this, and he did and I'm
cancer free all these years.
Like trials will come, but thetrials that I'm talking about in
(24:23):
my book is hardcore trials,things that are life threatening
to the point where you got tosay that Psalms 23,.
You know the shadow of death,you know when you're facing.
You've lost your completeincome, you've lost your husband
, you've lost a child, you'resick and you get a diagnosis of
(24:45):
cancer or you have a terminaldisease.
These are hardcore trials.
And you say to yourself whywould God allow me to go through
these things and go through alot of these things, and how am
I going to get through it andstill keep my mind.
And this is this is was thereason that I wrote this book,
(25:06):
because I wanted people to knowthat, even though you're going
through the darkest of thedarkest of the days and the
hardest of the trials and you'recalling out to God and he
hasn't answered right away, thatyou can still have peace
through all of this.
And the way you can have thepeace is knowing God's word.
(25:28):
If you don't know God's word,you are not going to have the
tools to help get you throughevery day.
The tools to help get youthrough every day Because the
things that God gave us in hisword, the Bible, is a mysterious
book and they say that the wordof God is sharper than a sword.
(25:49):
So you have to imagine how muchpower God's word has in the
Bible to help you in your life,to change your life.
If you need it changed, to getthrough it, to clean you up, to
sanctify you.
When you're going through thedeepest of the hard trials, that
word will come up in you Like.
One of the chapters in my bookis from Aunt May, and I had to
(26:13):
use this scripture verse thatAunt May said her whole life.
Just a few weeks ago I was sosick I thought I was going to
die.
And I'm going to tell you thisscripture verse about Aunt May.
She was a woman of God, she wasa pastor of a church for years
and she just trusted God likenobody else trusted God.
(26:35):
And just last week I was sosick, and not only was I sick,
but my husband was sick and hehad.
I had to call an ambulance forhim and I was sick too, and
after the ambulance took himaway, I was just like shaking
and and it felt like I wasn'tgoing to be able to get through
this trial.
And I remember the scriptureverse that Aunt May said that
(26:57):
just was like the basis of herwhole life, and it's Psalms 46
and 1.
And it says and I could hearAunt May's voice and she would
say God is our refuge and ourstrength, a very present help in
trouble, and Aunt May said thatall the time and so when that
happened to me last week, I justkept, I got my own book out, my
(27:20):
own book, and I turned to thisand I just looked at Aunt May's
face and I could hear her sayingGod is our refuge and our
strength.
A in the Bible is greatEverything.
My husband always says that,but there's times when you're
going through something thatjust that one rhema from that
(27:44):
scripture verse will pick you upand lift you up.
So I kept repeating thatscripture verse over and I
repeated it for a half an hourand it just strengthened me.
It strengthened me so much andthat's what my book is about.
I have many scripture versesthat and examples and tools just
how you can get through thehard, hard trials when you are
(28:07):
alone, when you're crying byyourself, when you're in the
room by yourself and you feellike nobody in this whole world
is thinking about you and yourtroubles in that room and you're
all alone.
After my husband left in thatambulance, I was by myself, my
kids couldn't get to me and Iwas all alone and I felt all
alone for a few minutes.
But I knew I wasn't alone.
(28:29):
And when I started reading thatpart about the scripture verse,
I knew I wasn't here by myself.
And another thing in my book Iwrote that was a life changing
for me was to realize that Godis everywhere, at all times.
He's in every space of theuniverse, he's in every space of
(28:53):
earth, so we don't even have toclose our eyes and bow our head
.
So if God is everywhere and heknows how many hairs we have on
our head and he knows exactlywhat's going on every time with
us, then he knows exactly what'sgoing on with me right now.
So I've been just opening myeyes and just saying, god, I
(29:13):
need you.
I know that you're right herewith me.
I know you see everythingthat's going on with me right
now and I need your help.
I need for you to hug me.
That's what sometimes I say toGod.
I just need for you to hug me.
And I just read the scriptureverse.
And the scripture verses islike a hug.
It gets in my heart, itstrengthens my heart, it
(29:34):
strengthens my mind and before Iknow it, I just feel
strengthened to get through thattrial.
And I'm 72 years old right nowand I've been through all these
disastrous things and when Ilook back, I think about how God
healed me of cancer, how Godhealed my children that were in
the NICU All four of them was inthe NICU.
(29:56):
I think about my daughter whowas born, still born, still born
.
And I prayed there on thattable in the delivery room and I
said God, please don't let mychild die, please don't let my
baby die.
And after about five minutes Iheard a little teeny, weeny cry
and I heard the doctor say we'reokay.
(30:17):
And when I looked at my baby,when they brought her over to
take her to the NICU, she waslike blue as I can, and they
were happy that she wasbreathing.
But when I saw her she wascompletely blue where she was
born dead and he brought herback alive and my son was born.
He also was born very, very sickand he had a massive brain
(30:38):
hemorrhage and they said yourson is not going to walk or talk
, he's had a massive brainhemorrhage.
He could.
He was like two years old.
He couldn't sit up, he couldn'thold his head up and they put
him in a special school and letme tell you, my son got kicked
out of that school because theysaid he was too smart.
He had braces on his legs andthey took those braces off of
(30:59):
his legs one day and said thathe can walk.
And he started walking and hestarted talking and they put him
in regular school and he had tohave an aide and he was able to
go to regular school and,believe it or not, he made the
honor roll all through schooland graduated at the top of his
class.
And not only that, he went tocollege and he graduated
(31:21):
valedictorian and he walkedacross that stage his own self,
with it, under his own steam,and got his own diploma from
college.
And I am telling you it was hard.
My husband and I we went to theNICU so many times for our kids
and each time we went it was sohard.
But God got us through andhealed all of our kids.
(31:45):
They're all alive, they allhave great jobs, they all are
living and they're all doingwell.
So when I tell you, yes, lifeis hard, but at 72 years old,
when I have a lot to look backon and to see how God brought me
through each and everysituation, it has been amazing
what he has done One time thisis like a really hard story I
(32:09):
was being sued by a familymember and they all I had to get
an order of protection becauseI feared for my life.
And they all came down to thecourt and it was about 15 of
them and it was just me and myhusband and a domestic violence
person that was with us and theywere doing all sorts of things
(32:31):
and cursing me out andeverything.
And my husband and I were justsitting there by ourselves and I
felt the power of God just overus, giving us strength to get
through that situation.
And the domestic violence ladysaid let me call the security to
walk you out to your car.
And I said no.
I said no because I felt theprotection from God and I left
(32:53):
there.
And that legal situation Godgot me out of that.
I was being sued another timeand had to spend so much money,
but God was there.
And that legal situation Godgot me out of that.
I was being sued another timeand had to spend so much money,
but God was there.
He was a lawyer in thecourtroom.
They always say that, but it'strue, god is a lawyer in the
courtroom.
He's a doctor.
When you're in the operatingroom.
He's there for you every timeyou need him.
(33:13):
When you don't have food, whenyou can't pay your bills, when
you lose your job, god is thereand I am a living witness to
this.
I am a living witness to thisthat God is there for you.
I've lived a long time and everyday that I live now, at 72
years old, is gravy because I'mso grateful, knowing all that
(33:35):
I've been through, all of thehardships that I've been through
, how he has gotten me throughthat and I hold on to those
hardships like handrails and ithelps me to get through to the
next trial.
And I know that life is stillgoing to be hard for me going
forward because I have anillness, my husband has an
illness, but I know that God iswith me and he's watching over
(33:57):
me because he's proved it overand over and over again.
And that's why I wrote my bookcalled A Handbook for Surviving
Suffering, because it's aboutall that I've been speaking to
you about just now, all of thescripture verses, all of the
strength that I've gained andhow God has sustained me.
(34:18):
That word sustain is anunbelievable word for a
Christian, because God sustainsus when we're going through and
sometimes we may fall, sometimeswe may faint, but he comes
right in there and swoops us up.
And these last trials that I'vehad these past few years.
I just had a stroke in Februaryand I tell you I have fainted
(34:41):
and I'm probably still laying onthe floor.
But Jesus is carrying me aroundeverywhere, like that
footprints in the sand.
We always know, we always hearthat story, but it's really true
.
Whoever wrote that wrote thetruth, because God is carrying
me around everywhere.
Now I can't stand on my own.
I'm walking around on God'sstrength and the thing that
(35:03):
gives me encouragement is thathe's going to be with me until
my very last breath.
So I don't fear going home tobe with the Lord, because he's
already showed me that he iswith me and that he will never
leave me and he will neverforsake me.
And that's what got me throughmy childhood trauma.
My birthday is on the 27th andone day it was my birthday and
(35:25):
God says I want you to readPsalms 27.
And I was like why do you wantme to read that?
And in Psalms 27, it says whenthy mother and thy father
forsake you, then the Lord willtake you up.
And that's how I got through mychildhood and that's how I'm
getting through my life now, andit's tough.
Now it's really tough, but God,he is my refuge and my strength
(35:49):
.
Just like he said in his word.
He's not a man that he shouldlie, and sometimes my life is so
hard that he gives me a visionof me sitting in a field and
he's sitting there with me onthe grass and just giving me
peace, and peace in the midst ofthe storm.
And that's what my book isabout how you can have peace in
(36:11):
the midst of the storm.
Hallelujah, praise you Jesus,thank you Lord, thank you, lord,
for all you've done for me andfor you listeners who are
listening, that are goingthrough things.
I just pray for each one of themright now, lord.
Some of them are just losinghope and not even understanding
why you've allowed them to gothrough all of these things.
(36:33):
This, our suffering, haspurpose and a lot of people
don't understand that and theygo.
What purpose could God have forallowing us to go through this
trial?
What kind of purpose?
You know I would do it allagain to write this book and to
write the information that's inhere If it could help somebody
(36:57):
else.
I told God, he asked me thatand I said I do.
I go through my whole lifeagain If everything that you
brought me through and all thescriptures you gave me to
survive help me to write thishandbook for somebody else.
I do it again and again and Iwant people to listen, to know
that you don't have to go italone.
You don't have to feel alone.
You don't have to feel that Godis not watching over you,
(37:17):
because he is and we can'tquestion his ways, because he
told us specifically do not leanon your own understanding on
why he does what he does, and Ihave a saying for that.
And I said this is God's wayand God's world.
He's the creator.
He made us and he madeeverything to work like this and
we don't understand his ways.
(37:37):
We don't understand his ways.
We don't understand thesuffering.
We don't understand the pain,and as soon as we have it, we
want to question him.
But I don't question himanymore because I trust him,
because you know why.
One day he promised in his wordthat we are never going to shed
another tear, we're never goingto have any more pain.
He's going to take all of thesetroubles away and I look
(37:59):
forward to that day and it givesme hope to hang on and to make
it through.
My mother suffered at the end ofher life.
My mother-in-law suffered atthe end of her life.
Both of them had great physicalproblems.
And my mom, right before shedied, she was still in her
little prayer book and on herway to the hospital.
(38:20):
When she was dying, she wouldcome out of consciousness and
start praying for everybody andsay you guys just keep loving
God, just keep loving God allthe way to the hospital and my
mother didn't lose her faith andmy mother-in-law didn't lose
her faith.
As a matter of fact, mymother-in-law I have a picture
of her in my book because mymother-in-law suffered so, so
(38:41):
much.
And one day I asked her.
I said, mom, how are yougetting through all this
suffering?
She had congestive heartfailure and she had to be
brought back by the paddles Manytimes they had to call the
ambulance and bring her back tolife.
And when I asked her, how doesshe get through all that?
And she didn't say much.
She just handed me this littlebook and the little book was
(39:04):
called Ask for Healing, givenGrace.
And she gave me that book and Ididn't look at the book for
years and after she died I foundthat book in my belongings and
when I read it and read aboutthis lady who had Parkinson's
disease and she was a missionary, I understood what my
mother-in-law said and I saidwhat a woman of God that she was
(39:24):
, because she served in herchurch and loved God to the end,
even though she was sufferingjust like my mother.
And I said I want to be justlike my mother and my
mother-in-law, that no matterwhat happens to me, I'm not
going to question God.
I'm going to hold on to myfaith and what I saw them do.
And I'm going to do thatbecause I know people are
looking at me and saying shesays she's a Christian and God
(39:49):
is there for her.
So I am showing other peoplethat God is a keeper, he is a
peace giver, he will sustain you, he will provide for you to the
day you die.
That's what I want to show theother people that God is a
helper.
He is a helper.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
He is exactly who he says he is.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
He is.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Right.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
I'm a living witness.
I'm a living witness of it.
I've lived it, so I'm nottelling people something that I,
that I don't know.
You know I may not have atheological degree, and that's
okay, but I have life experienceand that's what I wrote on the
back of my book about myself.
I said, um, that I w, I have aum.
I went to the, I graduated fromthe school of trials and I have
(40:35):
a PhD in suffering and.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
I know what I'm talking about yeah, you're
living miracle and a testimony.
So you've shared.
So much for a lot I've been Ialways like to ask you know, um,
I want to get to like the how,because I know that we have
listeners who are thinking I, Iwant that, I don't know Jesus.
(41:03):
This way, what would you tellthat woman in terms of maybe
just a practical thing, ordidn't necessarily have to be
practical, because sometimes thethings of God don't.
They don't make practical sense, you know, but what would you
tell a woman who does not evenknow how to take the first step
(41:23):
towards experiencing this lovingGod that you have described?
Speaker 1 (41:30):
Well, god will help you.
He will help you if you'reseeking him, if you want to know
the God that has helped me.
And you don't know God at all.
All I can tell you is to beopen about it.
You know to be a seeker, tojust say to yourself God, I want
(41:55):
to ask you.
I don't really believe in youand I don't really have any
knowledge.
I didn't grow up with religionin my household.
But I want to know what thislady is talking about and I want
to know if you're real or not.
And when you say those thingsto God, he will reveal himself
to you.
He loves people who are seekinghim and that word seek, s-e-e-k
(42:19):
.
Seeking God.
As long as you are seekinganswers, he will put people in
your path.
He will get the information toyou some way, because God is
always talking to everybodywho's ever been born anyway.
He has the Holy Spirit.
(42:39):
You may not understand aboutthe Holy Spirit, but the Holy
Spirit's job is to tap eachperson on their shoulder and say
God is real, god is real, godis real.
So the Holy Spirit is alreadytalking to you.
So when you get into a mode ofseeking, then God is going to
provide some way to get in touchwith you.
If you want to do it on your ownand you have a laptop or a
(43:03):
phone, get you know what theBible is.
Everybody knows the word Bible.
Get it out and just go to thebook of John.
Type in and Google the book ofJohn and just start reading John
one and read the whole storyabout Jesus Christ, because he's
the answer that you're lookingfor.
And if you have a Bible thatsomebody gave you, um, open it
(43:27):
up.
Turn to the book of John andread the story of Jesus, what he
did for your life and what youneed to understand that you need
to be seeking him and seekinganswers.
And a lot of people seek answersfrom astrology and looking in
the newspaper and finding theirbirth date and try to find that
(43:49):
there's no answers.
In that, some people try toseek other religions and try to
say well, you know, what aboutthis religion?
What about that religion?
What about this thing?
What about that religion?
And there is only.
I'm just going to say there'sonly one way to God, and that's,
and one way to heaven is that'sthrough his son, jesus Christ.
So you need to want to know whoJesus is, and some religions
(44:15):
don't want to even want tomention Jesus.
A lot of people get upset abouthis name, but that's the only
way that you're going to findout what I'm talking to you
about and you're responsible foryourself.
A lot of people were raised inhomes with no religion.
A lot of people were raisedwith other religions, but as an
adult, you are responsible tofind out the truth your own self
(44:38):
.
So you kind of have to say youknow, I want to find the right
way, I want to which?
Which one of these religions isthe right way, but I can tell
you about Jesus Christ.
He's the only religion that theperson gave his life and came
back alive.
None of the other religions orother ways to have a story like
(45:01):
that.
It's a very unique story and ifyou don't believe in Jesus,
there is historical evidencethat he did live historical
evidence and so you have to do alot of seeking.
You have to want to know yourown self and really be looking
for yourself and looking foranswers for yourself, because we
all are seeking.
(45:21):
I was seeking it at one time inmy life until I actually came
to the knowledge of Jesus Christ.
So if you don't know him at all, just start by Googling Jesus
or Googling the book of John inthe Bible, and just start there
and just start your own searchand you will definitely find the
(45:45):
answers there.
I can guarantee you, if you look, you will find the answers.
You can take that to the bankand cash it.
If you're looking for the rightanswers for your life, you're
looking for the way to God andyou heard about Jesus and you
heard a lot of people are kindof upset when I'm all well, who
is Jesus?
Who is Jesus?
He was really here and there'shistorical evidence that he was
(46:07):
here.
So do your homework, do yourinvestigation, start looking,
and as you're looking andinvestigating, then knowledge is
going to come into your mindand into your heart and you're
going to get answers to whatyou're looking for, as long as
you're seeking the answers.
Speaker 2 (46:23):
Yes, so good.
I'm reminded of how, when Ifound the Lord, I say that he
found me because I was seekingand he came and he got me.
He scooped me up.
He found me because I wasseeking and he came and he got
me.
He scooped me up, and Iremember I describe it as I had
(46:46):
to get to the point where Iwanted to know the truth more
than I wanted to defend mycurrent belief system.
You know, you got to be willingto lay your current belief
system aside to find the honestto God truth, and that's what
the Lord did for me and I knowthat that's what he does for all
who are seeking.
You want to know the truth.
He is true, and it's our job toto to keep our job.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
We're responsible for our own souls.
So if you die and you let'sjust say you die and you go to
heaven and you're like I mean,you don't go to heaven, you die
and here is the afterlife andyou go well, well God, why can't
I come to heaven?
He says, well, I sent you allthis information on Jesus and
everything.
But you know, that's not what Iwas raised in my household with
(47:26):
.
But as an adult, like I told,this is the perfect example.
I raised six kids and I was atough mom and I told my kids I
know I raised you right, but ifyou are wacky when you grow up,
you're responsible to get yousome counseling on your own.
If you feel that you are wackybecause I didn't do this as a
(47:47):
parent and you know it's becauseof my mother I said, if you
were wackadoodle when you growup, go get your own self some
counseling, get your own mindstraight now.
So I'm going to tell everybodywho doesn't really know Christ
either You're responsible foryour own soul.
You can't say, well, well, Iwasn't raised in that and I
didn't know anything aboutreligion.
You're an adult now and you'reresponsible for getting the
(48:11):
proper information or, like yousaid the truth.
Look up the truth.
Look, look in your own, yourother religion.
If you have an other religion,look at that.
Compare it to what you've heardabout Christians and look, do
your own homework and find outabout.
Well, did Jesus really live,like the scrolls and all these
(48:33):
scrolls that they're findingover there in the Holy land?
Do your own research and youwill get the information, cause
if you looking for God, he willmake it known to you.
He will make himself known toyou.
I.
I guarantee it, guarantee it.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
Yeah, it's like we take one step towards him.
He takes a thousand stepstowards us and that's just kind
of the way that I've seen, thathe is very willing to meet us.
You know, he's a.
Speaker 1 (48:59):
He's a God of love and but he is also very
mysterious.
You know, I tell God that allthe time.
I said God, you are verymysterious and you know it's a
lot to his personality andthere's a lot of things, the
words, that we use about him.
God is love, god is patient,god is the.
(49:22):
There's a lot of differentaspects about him, but one thing
about him is that he's holy andhe's a just God.
So you have to get yourselfstraight with God by
understanding that you don'thave a real relationship with
him.
So you need to repent.
That's a really big word,repentance.
(49:46):
And what does that mean?
It means that we need to besorry for the bad things that
we've done in our life, becausenobody is perfect, Nobody can
say that they're perfect.
So because you're not perfect,it's kind of hard for you to get
in touch with God.
So it is simple once you getthe information.
That's why you need to get aBible.
(50:06):
That's why you need to get thebook of John and you need to
study Jesus' life and see whathe was all about and what he did
.
They say this Jesus died on across.
For you.
You probably don't know whatthat means that you need to be
saved.
So you've got to be aninvestigator, a detective,
because you know why, becauseyour soul depends on it, because
(50:28):
once you die, that's it.
If you made a mistake, youcan't go.
Whoops, can I go back down toearth and go get those books and
and read and and go back?
There is no do-over.
So make sure that you know thetruth before you die.
And as and at this rate, there'sso many disasters happening you
(50:49):
know floods, hurricanes andthis, that and the other you,
you need to be ready because oneday we're all going to die.
I'm going to die, you're goingto die, we're all going to die.
But where are we going to be?
Are we going to be in heaven?
Are we going to be in hell?
So do your investigation now,while you have time.
You still have time and if youhave a phone, you can get the
(51:15):
Bible on the phone.
There's no excuses.
You don't have to go to theChristian bookstore and buy one.
Just get on your phone, type inBible, the book of John, and
just start reading.
Start somewhere, because youneed help now.
You're going through a lot ofhard times, a lot of
difficulties, and you're notmaking it on your own.
And for those who are suicidal,because I always have to say
this if there's anybody who issuicidal right now and you're
not making it on your own, andfor those who are suicidal,
because I always have to saythis, if there's anybody who is
(51:37):
suicidal right now and you feellike you can't make it to
tomorrow, please pick up yourphone and dial 988 and talk to
somebody.
There is help available.
Please, if you want, if youneed more help to help you, your
childhood trauma, find acounselor, go to a psychiatrist,
get a therapist.
That's what I did.
I did get help and it did helpme because I had a lot of
(52:00):
childhood trauma and and it tookme years to work out all of
that hurt that was in my heart,to sort it all out, and I have
to say that I have forgiven myparents totally.
Some people you even have toforgive them if they're already
in the grave.
You can't let them keepreaching out for you.
(52:21):
You got to solve these thingsin your heart so that you can
have peace.
So get yourself someprofessional help.
Don't be ashamed of it.
I used to be ashamed to tellpeople that I was in a mental
institution.
It was embarrassing.
I didn't want people to knowthat story.
But now I tell everybody.
Because why suffer?
Why suffer when there's helpavailable?
(52:42):
And some of the traumas thatwe've gone through, such as rape
, such as childhood trauma,molestations those things have
to be dealt with.
And these professional peoplethat's their profession they
really can help you through that.
But with that, you also needsomething for your soul, which
is where faith comes in, andhaving a relationship with God
(53:06):
and a relationship with Jesus.
And all of these things worktogether to give you the peace
that you are seeking and havebeen seeking in your life and to
help you get over all thetrauma.
There is a way out.
You got to work on it.
You got to work on it.
Speaker 2 (53:21):
Yes, amen, this has been so good.
Thank you so much.
So much wisdom.
Speaker 1 (53:27):
Well, I'm 72 years old.
I finally got some wisdom.
My mother said that I wouldn'tbe smart.
Eventually, you have a littleknowledge and I don't want other
people to suffer.
I don't want you to sufferneedlessly when I know that
there is help out there.
There's help secularly andthere's help biblically, and the
(53:48):
most help that you need is toknow God as your, as your father
, to know Jesus as your Lord andsavior.
That's where 99.99% of my helphas been, and a small portion of
that has been from counseling.
So, please, people, please goand get counseling if you need
(54:09):
it.
Don't be ashamed of it.
You know a lot of the athletesare mentioning now about mental
health.
It's it's it's so good thatpeople are talking about mental
health.
I'm so proud of Simone Bilesand um, there was another
swimmer, um, I forgot his name.
He was on the thing, he, he waslike the first one that says
I'm having a mental healthcrises and now it's like people
(54:32):
are going oh, other people aregetting help.
They're not ashamed to talkabout it.
So don't you be ashamed, youknow?
And if your church doesn't wantto talk about mental health
because I haven't gotten a wholelot of help from church as far
as having mental healthsituation, so sometimes you have
(54:55):
to go and find your health.
There are Christian counselorsout there that are excellent.
There are regular counselorsthat are excellent.
There's licensed social workers.
Now there's all kinds of traumapeople with.
For PTSD, there's all differentkinds of techniques, like CBT
therapy and all differenttherapies to help you to get to
a better place.
(55:16):
So take advantage of thosethings.
But your, your best help is toseek God first, and then he will
provide these people if that'sthe way that you want to go.
But get help for yourself.
Emotionally, you're responsiblefor your own self.
Sometimes nobody's going tohelp you, but you.
So it's.
We have these podcasts on that.
(55:36):
People come on and share theirstories with you.
Why?
Because they just want to talkabout it.
No, because they want to helpyou.
They want to give you the toolsso that you can go to get help,
so you're not sitting in yourhouse crying and boohooing to
the point where you're sodepressed that you can't even
function.
There's no need to be like that.
The point where you're sodepressed that you can't even
function.
There's no need to be like that.
(55:57):
There's help out there.
Thank you for having thesepodcasts to have a platform so
people know that they're notalone.
That there's other people.
There's other people that havegone through your trauma.
You're not alone in this andthere's a way out.
That's the important part.
There's a way out.
Speaker 2 (56:11):
There is a way out, okay.
So thank you so much.
I want to ask, if you don'tmind, would you close us out
with a prayer and then I'll haveyou share a little bit where
listeners could maybe find youor your work or whatever.
You have a link or somethinglike that.
But could you pray over thelistener?
Speaker 1 (56:29):
Oh sure.
Speaker 2 (56:30):
As we close out.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
We just give you all the praise, Heavenly Father.
I just thank you, Lord, thatyou provide with this new
technology that we have.
It's so amazing.
People, Lord, are usingtechnology for bad things, but,
Lord, there is so much goodthat's coming out of it and we
thank you for that.
So much good that's coming outof it and we thank you for that.
(56:57):
And I pray for each person thatis tuned into this podcast, Lord
, that I can even feel that someof them out there are just
hurting.
I even feel that some of themare just crying watching this
and listening to the things thatare being said, because you
know why, Because God touchedtheir heart.
I know that you're touchingthem.
I pray, Lord, for each personthat's listening, that's going
(57:18):
through things that you willjust please touch their heart,
their mind and their souls.
Just help them by the power ofyour Holy Spirit to let them get
the knowledge of you.
You are the answer, HeavenlyFather.
Touch them as they.
You are the answer, HeavenlyFather.
Touch them as they reach fortheir Bibles, as they reach out
and try to read the scripturesto get help for themselves.
(57:40):
Sometimes it's complex, buthelp them to understand the
things that you are saying tothem, because it's your love
letter to us, it's your help forus.
You have so much in there tohelp them.
So I pray, Lord, that they willhold on to their Bible, read
their Bible daily and try tounderstand what you have given
(58:04):
us to make it through.
And for those who do not knowChrist at all, those who don't
know anything about you, I prayfor them, Heavenly Father, that
you will just let them beseeking, that.
Give them a spirit of seeking toseek answers, to seek you, to
seek who you are, to seek whyyou sent somebody named Jesus to
(58:26):
this earth and what they did.
Please help them to understand.
And for everybody who isshedding a tear, I pray for
every tear that's falling fromsomebody's face right now.
Lord, I just pray that youwould just give them a hug, Just
let them feel your love, thatyou are real, that you do care
(58:47):
about them, that you understandthat the pain that they're going
through, the suffering thatthey're going through.
You understand that, Lord, andthat you are there for them.
Lord, we just thank you forthis time that this sister and I
have had together and we justagree together to pray that
people will be healed from thethings that they have heard
(59:10):
today and from the many otherpodcasts that's been on here,
and we ask this all these thingsin Jesus name, Amen and amen.
Speaker 2 (59:19):
Amen.
Well, that's a wrap on anotherincredible episode.
What a testimony.
I love how the Lord connects mewith these wonderful women who
I feel like we've known eachother for years, and hopefully
that comes through with you too.
I think that's the way it iswhen we connect through the
spirit of God, you know.
Anyways, I want to add thatbecause Tanya and I just talked
(59:42):
our way off of this episode, youknow, I had to cut it off
somewhere and I realized that Inever actually had her drop her
links, and so I'm just going todirect you to her blog page.
I'm just going to direct you toher blog page.
Her blog isgodspeaks-i-listencom.
I will include all of the linksto connect with this wonderful
woman of God in the show notesand, in the meantime, if you
(01:00:07):
would like to be on the podcast,you can go to
newcreationpodcastcom andconnect with me there.
Or, better yet, just send me aDM.
Go to my Instagram atjimmyslachelle, send me a DM
there and let's connect.
No-transcript.
(01:16:13):
No-transcript.
And I'm 72 years old right now and I've been through
all these disastrous things andwhen I look back, I think about
how God healed me of cancer, howGod healed my children that
were in the NICU All four ofthem was in the NICU.
I think about my daughter whowas born, still born, still born
(00:20):
, and I prayed there on thattable in the delivery room and I
said God, please don't let mychild die, Please don't let my
baby die.
And after about five minutes Iheard a little teeny, weeny cry
and I heard the doctor say we'reokay.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
Hey, welcome back to a new creation podcast where we
are pointing women towards avictory in Christ, one Jesus
story at a time.
I'm your host, jamis LachelleDrury.
I'm a Christian traumatherapist.
Let's get right in to today'sepisode, okay, all right.
Well, welcome back to thepodcast.
Friends, I am very excited tointroduce to you the reverend
(01:04):
tanya nemoli.
She's a licensed minister.
She's a mom of six children, agrandmother of two, she's
married to reverend james anemoli and she's an author of
three books.
Tanya can also be seenperforming her ventriloquist act
with her sidekick, miss jay,which sounds so fun and exciting
, at Samantha's Little Bit ofHeaven in East Northport, new
(01:29):
York.
She's been serving the Lord inministry for over 50 years, and
so that is our very official bio, but I want to welcome you here
, tanya, and give you a chanceto tell us a little bit about
yourself in your own way.
Speaker 1 (01:44):
Tanya and give you a chance to tell us a little bit
about yourself in your own way.
Well, thank you so much forhaving me.
I really appreciate youallowing me to come on and tell
my story.
Yes, I am a mother of sixchildren.
I have five biological childrenand, if that wasn't enough, I
decided to adopt one, and I'mmarried to Reverend James Nimley
(02:05):
and let's see what else aboutme.
I love the Lord and I just.
My passion is to get as manypeople to go to heaven as
humanly possible that I can dowhile I'm down here on earth.
That is my total purpose forbeing here right now.
(02:26):
I'm grateful that God gave me72 years being, with all the
problems that I've had in mylife, that he honored me with
allowing me to live for 72 years.
I just had a birthday the daybefore yesterday, so I'm just.
I'm grateful.
It's like it's all gravy now.
Every minute that I live isgravy because I look at it as
(02:48):
another opportunity to win asoul for the kingdom.
So I'm all about soul winning,so is my husband, and that's our
whole purpose.
That's what we do.
I've written out over, I'vewritten out my testimony and
I've given it out to over 4 000people so far, and I I just
(03:09):
wrote a few books and I'm hopingthat they will go out into the
vineyard and speak to people'sheart and lead them to lord, to
the lord, because they all havethe salvation message at the end
of the book.
So that's what I'm about is I'mjust trying to get as many
people to um um, to heaven aspossible, and I'm working for
the kingdom of God.
(03:29):
I'm on the clock.
I'm an ambassador for the Lord,and that is my purpose for being
here right now.
Speaker 2 (03:36):
Amen, I love that You're about your father's
business.
Speaker 1 (03:39):
Absolutely.
I'm on the clock.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Okay.
So my question is uh, how didyou get to this point where you
are so on fire for, sosingle-minded about the father's
business?
Um, in other words, you know,was there?
Did you have a significantmoment where you came to know
Jesus?
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Oh, yes, oh yes, I did.
Well, I accepted the Lord whenI was about 13 years old,
watching Billy Graham on TV, butI didn't, you know, when I
turned 18, you know, 18 yearolds, do we just go out on our
own path and forget about Godfor quite a while until he reels
(04:21):
you back in?
And, believe me, he has hisways of reeling you back in.
Um, my obsession with god camefrom, um, him healing me of, uh,
depression and suicidalideations.
But my problems go back waybefore that.
So, and I just want to talk alittle bit about my childhood
(04:42):
trauma I don't want to dwell onit because I've been talking a
lot about it.
So it's bringing back all thememories but I grew up with
absolutely no love from myparents.
Just absolutely no love, nointeraction with my father at
all.
I mean, he lived in the home,he worked, he was a good
provider, I had a nice house andeverything.
(05:04):
Home he worked, he was a goodprovider, I had a nice house and
everything.
But there was no interaction,which really hurt me to the core
of my heart.
And my mother she also didn'tjust seem to be disgusted with
me.
I just could never do anythingright, and I think what led to
that is my mother and father hadtheir own baggage in their
lives from their growing up.
And I think what led to that ismy mother and father had their
(05:25):
own baggage in their lives fromtheir growing up.
And then they look after theygot married they lost the child.
He was two years old.
He died from complications ofcerebral palsy.
So when my sister came alongfive years after I was born she
was sickly also and was in andout of the hospital and
intensive care.
(05:46):
So I just kind of got left bythe wayside and, being that I
didn't do good in school becauseI had a learning disability and
the teachers told my parentsthat I was smart but I was lazy.
So that just added fuel on thefire to them not liking me.
And then I was bullied inschool really bad.
(06:06):
So it seems like I could neverdo anything to please my parents
or get their attention.
So by the time I was 12 yearsold I just said forget this
world.
God made a mistake when he mademe.
He made people with the blindand no legs, so he made me with
no brain.
So I must be a mistake.
(06:28):
So one night I decided to takemy life at 12 years old and I
took a whole bunch of my allergypills and I was so my heart was
in so much pain.
I went downstairs in myparents' room.
They were sleeping, it was lateat night and they woke up and I
told them what I did and I wascrying and they told me to go in
(06:50):
my room that it was between meand God.
I remember that from growing upand them telling me that, and
then me growing up and justremembering that that's what
they said is between me and God.
So I crippled along in my life.
I managed to graduate schooland then I jumped into
(07:15):
relationships with men that Ihad no business doing, because I
was looking for somebody tolove me, to just give me some
self-worth or something, and soI made a lot of mistakes and
then, at 19, I married a manthat I barely knew and the first
week it was domestic violenceall the way through four years
(07:38):
of marriage with him, and then Igot out of that marriage and I
married another man, which is mypresent husband, but I didn't
know he was an alcoholic when Ifirst married him.
Long story short, he became aminister, gave up the alcohol
and he was a very patient,patient man with me through the
(07:58):
baggage that I brought into themarriage.
I brought so much baggage frommy parents to the divorce and
being a domestic violencesurvivor and I bought all that
to the marriage.
But my present husband was verypatient with me.
So I still was suicidal all thetime.
(08:20):
And to make another long storyshort because it's very long,
because I want to get to how Godbrought me through this One day
I was in my thirties I had hadthree children.
Two of them were in school andthe third one was a toddler.
So she was in her crib and Iwas so depressed that day I went
(08:42):
to the kitchen, put her in acrib, put her to sleep.
And I was so depressed that dayI went to the kitchen, put her
in a crib, put her to sleep andwent down in the kitchen and got
a knife and turned it backwardsand was sticking it in my chest
when all of a sudden I heard mydaughter pulling on my dress,
going mommy, mommy, and Idropped the knife and picked her
up and I just cried and Icalled my husband at work.
(09:03):
He came home, I said I got toget help and I signed myself
into a mental institution thathelped a little bit with the
situation with my parents.
So I got that straightened out,that it wasn't me, it was them
and I told them everything Iever wanted to tell them about
it, to their shock and then, westarted the process of
(09:29):
restoration with my relationshipwith them.
So I had to forgive them, whichwas hard.
It took a lot of years toforgive them and to get my life
back that I really never had.
So I still was suffering fromdepression after that and one
day I was crying, as I alwayscried, and somebody had given me
(09:53):
a Bible and I never read it,but they gave it to me for a
gift.
So I was so sad this day and Isaid I tried everything.
I was in counseling for years.
I assigned myself into a mentalinstitution.
I'm still depressed.
I know that the next time I trythis suicide thing it's going
(10:14):
to work, because I just couldn'ttake the pain anymore.
So what I did was I got thatBible out and I didn't even know
what to look up.
I got that Bible out and Ididn't even know what to look up
and the Lord led me to I don'tknow how, psalms 86.
And it talked about God, pleasehelp me.
(10:36):
And I cried and I said, god, ifyou don't help me this time you
know, because you have allknowledge that I'm not I'm
really going to be successfulthe next time.
And he didn't really doanything right away, but he
healed me, healed my mind ofdepression in a very unique way.
So somebody had given me adozen roses when I was in the
(10:59):
mental institution silk rosesand I decided to try to make
corsages out of them.
So I started making corsagesand I cut each one up and made
corsages and I sold them all.
And then my neighbor across thestreet asked me to do her
daughter's wedding flowers and Isaid okay, and I didn't know
(11:21):
how to do wedding flowers.
So I went to the craft store,bought some books on how to make
bouquets and all this otherstuff and I did her whole
wedding.
And it was like, where did Iget these skills from?
They just came.
I was always crafty, I sewed andI crocheted, so I just taught
(11:42):
myself how to do it.
And then I just started buyingmore silk flowers and making all
kinds of arrangements.
And I bought teacups and gluedthem together and made
arrangements in the teacups andthen I made larger arrangements
and vases and then my wholehouse, like every room, was just
(12:02):
filled with flowers because Ijust kept making them like a
factory.
Then I said to myself, what amI going to do with all these
flowers?
So my husband and I decidedthat I should sell them at craft
fairs.
So we bought a few shells andwe took all of our kids and we
did all kind of you knowcommunity fairs and we just was
(12:23):
doing them like in thesummertime.
We were doing them like everyweek.
We were doing a craft fairs, andwe just was doing them like in
the summertime, and we weredoing them like every week.
We were doing a craft fair hereand I was selling the flowers,
and then I was doing moreweddings.
And then one day I said tomyself I haven't experienced any
depression.
No sadness.
Depression, no sadness, nocrying.
(12:53):
And I said, oh, my goodness,I'm happy.
I never experienced happinessbefore, ever.
I was happy inside.
I was so happy and I knew thatGod healed me.
Speaker 2 (13:04):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And not long after that the Lord had been tapping
on my husband and I's heart togo to church and we were
ignoring him.
And so one day we got a flyerin our fence and it said heaven
to hell, what do you want foryour life?
And I was Lutheran, my husbandwas Catholic and he said he was
going to die Catholic, so hedidn't want to talk about any
(13:25):
other religion.
But this one day we have beengoing through so much that when
that flyer came in the fence Icalled the number up and this
pastor said he would come overmy house.
He came over my house andprayed for my husband and I
invited us to church.
And we went to this church.
He said it was a Pentecostalchurch and I was scared of
(13:47):
Pentecostal churches.
I was like oh my goodness, thesepeople are going to be hanging
off the chandeliers.
And so we said, well, we'll goand sit in the back of the
church.
So we went and we tried to sitin the back of the church but
the pastor saw us and was likethis is a family that came from
our operation saturation, thatwe went through the whole
(14:07):
neighborhood and they ushered usto the front row.
Speaker 2 (14:10):
And.
Speaker 1 (14:11):
I know, and we didn't even know about clapping in
church and moving to music, andso we were like sitting there,
like little pumpkins, our family.
But you know what, when they hadthe altar call at the end, but
you know what, when they had thealtar call at the end, oh my
goodness, my husband and I wentto that altar and we, we were at
church every time the doorsopened, all of us and our kids,
(14:55):
and we became, my husband and I,became committed Christians and
we dedicated the rest of ourlives to working for the Lord
and and I haven't stopped at all, I'm not looking back not look
back, happy in the Lord, nodepression and suicide.
But did all the problems stop inour lives?
Absolutely not.
We continue to have all kindsof problems because just because
(15:20):
you're you uh committedyourself to the Lord doesn't
mean that that's like a a pencileraser and everything's going
to be.
All your suffering is going tobe gone.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
As a matter of fact, it intensifies yeah yeah I think
a lot of times you know we'rewaiting for this magic pill
moment.
You know where, oh,everything's settled and it is
better, it better.
Life with Christ is so muchbetter.
But I think that what I'mhearing you say is that you know
(15:49):
you've experienced the instantdeliverance of he healed your
depression, and you didn't evenknow that he had done that.
No, didn't even know reallyfast move of God.
But then you've alsoexperienced what it looks like
for him to be with you throughthe process of the struggle and
(16:09):
the suffering.
And just because you're you'restruggling does not mean that
God's not with you.
Speaker 1 (16:15):
Right, I just wanted.
I want to just end with thethings that I've been through so
that I can get to the thingsthat God has done for me, that I
can get to the things that Godhas done for me Just real quick.
I have been through, like Isaid, bullying by children and
then, as I became an adult, Iwas bullied by adults too.
(16:36):
There is adult bullying Peopledon't know that but it is when
people are mean to you.
I have domestic violence.
I've been sick for most of myentire life.
I've been raped twice.
I have disabled children.
Four of my children were inintensive care when they were
born.
I survived cancer and I alsohave a learning disability and I
(16:57):
have a mystery illness thatI've had over 12,000 episodes of
a mystery illness every day.
So that is all that I have beenthrough and what I'm going
through now, and so what I haveto say about all of this is I've
made this little lineup to tellyou today, and it's I still
(17:18):
have troubles, but troublesdon't have me, God has me now.
I made that up just for you.
I'm going to say it again soyou listeners can hear I still
have troubles, but troublesdon't have me, God has me now.
Speaker 2 (17:34):
Amen, yeah, it's a perspective change.
Speaker 1 (17:37):
Absolutely, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
I love that.
It's reminded me of somethingthat my pastor shared um, in the
scriptures, it tells us, youknow, we say often, when the
enemy comes in like a floodgate,god will raise up a standard.
And my pastor had preached how,back in you know the times when
that scripture was written,there wasn't punctuation.
(18:02):
There wasn't things like that.
There's no punctuation.
And so when we open our bibles,we tend to see, when the enemy
comes in like a floodgate, comma.
Then god raises up a standard.
And my pastor was teaching us tosort of have a perspective
shift away from oh, this enemyis the enemy, is the floodgate,
(18:24):
to remembering that our God, ourGod, is the one who raises up a
standard, our God is the onewho holds us, our God is the one
who has the power, our God isthe one.
It's like a mindset shift, arenewing of the mind that we
have to do, you know, in orderto live out to, to, to live out
(18:45):
of faith life.
Otherwise our problems woulddestroy us and cripple us.
But it's like no, I love whatyou said the Lord, he holds you.
Speaker 1 (18:55):
Yep, he has me now.
As a matter of fact, I have acharm bracelet and on it, Um, I
have taken.
I have a charm that says taken,because I feel like um Jesus
died for me.
He owns me now and I am takenand God is my father and I'm.
I'm good with it, I'm good withthat.
Speaker 2 (19:15):
Yeah, praise the Lord , praise the Lord, I've been.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
I've been searching for love my whole life.
I've been searching for love mywhole life.
I wanted somebody to love meand I have a wonderful husband
who loves me.
We've been married for 48 years.
But you know what I told myhusband?
I said I am so glad that youare not jealous of my
relationship with God, because Iam obsessed with God.
He is the love of my life.
(19:43):
He takes care of me eventhrough the really, really,
really hard times.
There's a song by Kirk Franklincalled Real Love, and I just
love that song because it says Isearched all over and I finally
found my real love.
And so in my life it's Godfirst, and then the love that I
(20:05):
have for my husband, and thenagape love that I have for
everybody else.
That's the order of things.
So I am obsessed with God andI'm going to that's.
What helps me through thetrials is his love.
It's not just me finding abouthis love, but I had to learn how
(20:26):
to love God.
I didn't even know how to lovehim because I didn't have any
experience with love from achild.
So I had to learn how to loveGod and I had to learn that God
loves me.
A lot of people don't understandhow much God loves us.
You know, my husband told mesomething that totally changed
my life.
He preached a sermon one daythat I will never, ever, ever
(20:48):
forget, and he explained to methat the devil was very jealous
when God decided to make humanbeings.
He was very, very jealousbecause he was an angel, and
angels can never be God's child.
But we who accept Jesus Christ,we are God's child.
(21:12):
So when the devil figured outthat God was going to make human
beings and give them anopportunity to be adopted into
his family and be his child, thedevil figured out that God was
going to make human beings andgive them an opportunity to be
adopted into his family and behis child.
The devil was very jealous ofus, and so he has tried to shame
God and making us.
He has tried to keep usseparated from God.
(21:32):
But if we knew how special weare to God, that we are his
children, those who haveaccepted Jesus Christ as their
Lord and Savior.
We are God's child and he hasto take care of us.
He has to because he's ourfather and the way he gave what
(21:52):
he gave us to take care of us,he didn't leave us without any
help.
So I want people to know ifyou're not a Christian, don't
look at us and go.
Oh, they still are suffering.
No, he gave us hope and thishelp and hope is the Holy Bible,
and in the Bible is everythingthat we need to take care of
(22:13):
ourselves.
That he gave us to take care ofus.
You know, my husband preached asermon that I wrote in my book
and it was called, and I wasreally upset when I heard his
title and it was when God'sgrace is not enough.
And so when he told me thetitle of his teaching, I was
like dude, are you crazy?
What do you mean when God'sgrace is not enough?
(22:33):
And he says, wait till you hearthis teaching, wait till you
hear it.
And I trust him because myhusband loves the word, I love
to pray, he loves the word.
So when he taught that teaching, he explained what he meant,
and he meant that when God'sgrace is not enough is when you
(22:55):
don't reach out and take it,because it's available to get us
through this life.
So if we don't hold on to God'sgrace and reach out for it and
trust him, then we're not goingto have that grace.
So that was like a life anotherone of my husband's
life-changing things.
(23:17):
We have to reach out for God'sgrace.
It's ever-flowing,ever-available and when you know
God's word and you trust in Godand you know about his grace,
you are going to make it throughthis life.
And that's how I've made itthrough this life.
So recently I've written a bookand I know that you know I don't
(23:39):
want to just come on here andtry to promote my book, but I
just want to tell you about itbecause the name of the book is
a handbook for survivingsuffering.
In the midst of trouble you canstill have peace and this is my
life.
This is what happened to me.
This is how I have gottenthrough all of the heavy, heavy,
(24:02):
hard card trials.
Now people have trials all thetime.
Trials come and you get sick,you get a cold, you get the flu.
You get over it.
Like I had cancer.
That was a trial.
The doctor says we're going tohandle this, and he did and I'm
cancer free all these years.
Like trials will come, but thetrials that I'm talking about in
(24:23):
my book is hardcore trials,things that are life threatening
to the point where you got tosay that Psalms 23,.
You know the shadow of death,you know when you're facing.
You've lost your completeincome, you've lost your husband
, you've lost a child, you'resick and you get a diagnosis of
(24:45):
cancer or you have a terminaldisease.
These are hardcore trials.
And you say to yourself whywould God allow me to go through
these things and go through alot of these things, and how am
I going to get through it andstill keep my mind.
And this is this is was thereason that I wrote this book,
(25:06):
because I wanted people to knowthat, even though you're going
through the darkest of thedarkest of the days and the
hardest of the trials and you'recalling out to God and he
hasn't answered right away, thatyou can still have peace
through all of this.
And the way you can have thepeace is knowing God's word.
(25:28):
If you don't know God's word,you are not going to have the
tools to help get you throughevery day.
The tools to help get youthrough every day Because the
things that God gave us in hisword, the Bible, is a mysterious
book and they say that the wordof God is sharper than a sword.
(25:49):
So you have to imagine how muchpower God's word has in the
Bible to help you in your life,to change your life.
If you need it changed, to getthrough it, to clean you up, to
sanctify you.
When you're going through thedeepest of the hard trials, that
word will come up in you Like.
One of the chapters in my bookis from Aunt May, and I had to
(26:13):
use this scripture verse thatAunt May said her whole life.
Just a few weeks ago I was sosick I thought I was going to
die.
And I'm going to tell you thisscripture verse about Aunt May.
She was a woman of God, she wasa pastor of a church for years
and she just trusted God likenobody else trusted God.
(26:35):
And just last week I was sosick, and not only was I sick,
but my husband was sick and hehad.
I had to call an ambulance forhim and I was sick too, and
after the ambulance took himaway, I was just like shaking
and and it felt like I wasn'tgoing to be able to get through
this trial.
And I remember the scriptureverse that Aunt May said that
(26:57):
just was like the basis of herwhole life, and it's Psalms 46
and 1.
And it says and I could hearAunt May's voice and she would
say God is our refuge and ourstrength, a very present help in
trouble, and Aunt May said thatall the time and so when that
happened to me last week, I justkept, I got my own book out, my
(27:20):
own book, and I turned to thisand I just looked at Aunt May's
face and I could hear her sayingGod is our refuge and our
strength.
A in the Bible is greatEverything.
My husband always says that,but there's times when you're
going through something thatjust that one rhema from that
(27:44):
scripture verse will pick you upand lift you up.
So I kept repeating thatscripture verse over and I
repeated it for a half an hourand it just strengthened me.
It strengthened me so much andthat's what my book is about.
I have many scripture versesthat and examples and tools just
how you can get through thehard, hard trials when you are
(28:07):
alone, when you're crying byyourself, when you're in the
room by yourself and you feellike nobody in this whole world
is thinking about you and yourtroubles in that room and you're
all alone.
After my husband left in thatambulance, I was by myself, my
kids couldn't get to me and Iwas all alone and I felt all
alone for a few minutes.
But I knew I wasn't alone.
(28:29):
And when I started reading thatpart about the scripture verse,
I knew I wasn't here by myself.
And another thing in my book Iwrote that was a life changing
for me was to realize that Godis everywhere, at all times.
He's in every space of theuniverse, he's in every space of
(28:53):
earth, so we don't even have toclose our eyes and bow our head
.
So if God is everywhere and heknows how many hairs we have on
our head and he knows exactlywhat's going on every time with
us, then he knows exactly what'sgoing on with me right now.
So I've been just opening myeyes and just saying, god, I
(29:13):
need you.
I know that you're right herewith me.
I know you see everythingthat's going on with me right
now and I need your help.
I need for you to hug me.
That's what sometimes I say toGod.
I just need for you to hug me.
And I just read the scriptureverse.
And the scripture verses islike a hug.
It gets in my heart, itstrengthens my heart, it
(29:34):
strengthens my mind and before Iknow it, I just feel
strengthened to get through thattrial.
And I'm 72 years old right nowand I've been through all these
disastrous things and when Ilook back, I think about how God
healed me of cancer, how Godhealed my children that were in
the NICU All four of them was inthe NICU.
(29:56):
I think about my daughter whowas born, still born, still born
.
And I prayed there on thattable in the delivery room and I
said God, please don't let mychild die, please don't let my
baby die.
And after about five minutes Iheard a little teeny, weeny cry
and I heard the doctor say we'reokay.
(30:17):
And when I looked at my baby,when they brought her over to
take her to the NICU, she waslike blue as I can, and they
were happy that she wasbreathing.
But when I saw her she wascompletely blue where she was
born dead and he brought herback alive and my son was born.
He also was born very, very sickand he had a massive brain
(30:38):
hemorrhage and they said yourson is not going to walk or talk
, he's had a massive brainhemorrhage.
He could.
He was like two years old.
He couldn't sit up, he couldn'thold his head up and they put
him in a special school and letme tell you, my son got kicked
out of that school because theysaid he was too smart.
He had braces on his legs andthey took those braces off of
(30:59):
his legs one day and said thathe can walk.
And he started walking and hestarted talking and they put him
in regular school and he had tohave an aide and he was able to
go to regular school and,believe it or not, he made the
honor roll all through schooland graduated at the top of his
class.
And not only that, he went tocollege and he graduated
(31:21):
valedictorian and he walkedacross that stage his own self,
with it, under his own steam,and got his own diploma from
college.
And I am telling you it was hard.
My husband and I we went to theNICU so many times for our kids
and each time we went it was sohard.
But God got us through andhealed all of our kids.
(31:45):
They're all alive, they allhave great jobs, they all are
living and they're all doingwell.
So when I tell you, yes, lifeis hard, but at 72 years old,
when I have a lot to look backon and to see how God brought me
through each and everysituation, it has been amazing
what he has done One time thisis like a really hard story I
(32:09):
was being sued by a familymember and they all I had to get
an order of protection becauseI feared for my life.
And they all came down to thecourt and it was about 15 of
them and it was just me and myhusband and a domestic violence
person that was with us and theywere doing all sorts of things
(32:31):
and cursing me out andeverything.
And my husband and I were justsitting there by ourselves and I
felt the power of God just overus, giving us strength to get
through that situation.
And the domestic violence ladysaid let me call the security to
walk you out to your car.
And I said no.
I said no because I felt theprotection from God and I left
(32:53):
there.
And that legal situation Godgot me out of that.
I was being sued another timeand had to spend so much money,
but God was there.
And that legal situation Godgot me out of that.
I was being sued another timeand had to spend so much money,
but God was there.
He was a lawyer in thecourtroom.
They always say that, but it'strue, god is a lawyer in the
courtroom.
He's a doctor.
When you're in the operatingroom.
He's there for you every timeyou need him.
(33:13):
When you don't have food, whenyou can't pay your bills, when
you lose your job, god is thereand I am a living witness to
this.
I am a living witness to thisthat God is there for you.
I've lived a long time and everyday that I live now, at 72
years old, is gravy because I'mso grateful, knowing all that
(33:35):
I've been through, all of thehardships that I've been through
, how he has gotten me throughthat and I hold on to those
hardships like handrails and ithelps me to get through to the
next trial.
And I know that life is stillgoing to be hard for me going
forward because I have anillness, my husband has an
illness, but I know that God iswith me and he's watching over
(33:57):
me because he's proved it overand over and over again.
And that's why I wrote my bookcalled A Handbook for Surviving
Suffering, because it's aboutall that I've been speaking to
you about just now, all of thescripture verses, all of the
strength that I've gained andhow God has sustained me.
(34:18):
That word sustain is anunbelievable word for a
Christian, because God sustainsus when we're going through and
sometimes we may fall, sometimeswe may faint, but he comes
right in there and swoops us up.
And these last trials that I'vehad these past few years.
I just had a stroke in Februaryand I tell you I have fainted
(34:41):
and I'm probably still laying onthe floor.
But Jesus is carrying me aroundeverywhere, like that
footprints in the sand.
We always know, we always hearthat story, but it's really true
.
Whoever wrote that wrote thetruth, because God is carrying
me around everywhere.
Now I can't stand on my own.
I'm walking around on God'sstrength and the thing that
(35:03):
gives me encouragement is thathe's going to be with me until
my very last breath.
So I don't fear going home tobe with the Lord, because he's
already showed me that he iswith me and that he will never
leave me and he will neverforsake me.
And that's what got me throughmy childhood trauma.
My birthday is on the 27th andone day it was my birthday and
(35:25):
God says I want you to readPsalms 27.
And I was like why do you wantme to read that?
And in Psalms 27, it says whenthy mother and thy father
forsake you, then the Lord willtake you up.
And that's how I got through mychildhood and that's how I'm
getting through my life now, andit's tough.
Now it's really tough, but God,he is my refuge and my strength
(35:49):
.
Just like he said in his word.
He's not a man that he shouldlie, and sometimes my life is so
hard that he gives me a visionof me sitting in a field and
he's sitting there with me onthe grass and just giving me
peace, and peace in the midst ofthe storm.
And that's what my book isabout how you can have peace in
(36:11):
the midst of the storm.
Hallelujah, praise you Jesus,thank you Lord, thank you, lord,
for all you've done for me andfor you listeners who are
listening, that are goingthrough things.
I just pray for each one of themright now, lord.
Some of them are just losinghope and not even understanding
why you've allowed them to gothrough all of these things.
(36:33):
This, our suffering, haspurpose and a lot of people
don't understand that and theygo.
What purpose could God have forallowing us to go through this
trial?
What kind of purpose?
You know I would do it allagain to write this book and to
write the information that's inhere If it could help somebody
(36:57):
else.
I told God, he asked me thatand I said I do.
I go through my whole lifeagain If everything that you
brought me through and all thescriptures you gave me to
survive help me to write thishandbook for somebody else.
I do it again and again and Iwant people to listen, to know
that you don't have to go italone.
You don't have to feel alone.
You don't have to feel that Godis not watching over you,
(37:17):
because he is and we can'tquestion his ways, because he
told us specifically do not leanon your own understanding on
why he does what he does, and Ihave a saying for that.
And I said this is God's wayand God's world.
He's the creator.
He made us and he madeeverything to work like this and
we don't understand his ways.
(37:37):
We don't understand his ways.
We don't understand thesuffering.
We don't understand the pain,and as soon as we have it, we
want to question him.
But I don't question himanymore because I trust him,
because you know why.
One day he promised in his wordthat we are never going to shed
another tear, we're never goingto have any more pain.
He's going to take all of thesetroubles away and I look
(37:59):
forward to that day and it givesme hope to hang on and to make
it through.
My mother suffered at the end ofher life.
My mother-in-law suffered atthe end of her life.
Both of them had great physicalproblems.
And my mom, right before shedied, she was still in her
little prayer book and on herway to the hospital.
(38:20):
When she was dying, she wouldcome out of consciousness and
start praying for everybody andsay you guys just keep loving
God, just keep loving God allthe way to the hospital and my
mother didn't lose her faith andmy mother-in-law didn't lose
her faith.
As a matter of fact, mymother-in-law I have a picture
of her in my book because mymother-in-law suffered so, so
(38:41):
much.
And one day I asked her.
I said, mom, how are yougetting through all this
suffering?
She had congestive heartfailure and she had to be
brought back by the paddles Manytimes they had to call the
ambulance and bring her back tolife.
And when I asked her, how doesshe get through all that?
And she didn't say much.
She just handed me this littlebook and the little book was
(39:04):
called Ask for Healing, givenGrace.
And she gave me that book and Ididn't look at the book for
years and after she died I foundthat book in my belongings and
when I read it and read aboutthis lady who had Parkinson's
disease and she was a missionary, I understood what my
mother-in-law said and I saidwhat a woman of God that she was
(39:24):
, because she served in herchurch and loved God to the end,
even though she was sufferingjust like my mother.
And I said I want to be justlike my mother and my
mother-in-law, that no matterwhat happens to me, I'm not
going to question God.
I'm going to hold on to myfaith and what I saw them do.
And I'm going to do thatbecause I know people are
looking at me and saying shesays she's a Christian and God
(39:49):
is there for her.
So I am showing other peoplethat God is a keeper, he is a
peace giver, he will sustain you, he will provide for you to the
day you die.
That's what I want to show theother people that God is a
helper.
He is a helper.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
He is exactly who he says he is.
Speaker 1 (40:09):
He is.
Speaker 2 (40:10):
Right.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
I'm a living witness.
I'm a living witness of it.
I've lived it, so I'm nottelling people something that I,
that I don't know.
You know I may not have atheological degree, and that's
okay, but I have life experienceand that's what I wrote on the
back of my book about myself.
I said, um, that I w, I have aum.
I went to the, I graduated fromthe school of trials and I have
(40:35):
a PhD in suffering and.
Speaker 2 (40:37):
I know what I'm talking about yeah, you're
living miracle and a testimony.
So you've shared.
So much for a lot I've been Ialways like to ask you know, um,
I want to get to like the how,because I know that we have
listeners who are thinking I, Iwant that, I don't know Jesus.
(41:03):
This way, what would you tellthat woman in terms of maybe
just a practical thing, ordidn't necessarily have to be
practical, because sometimes thethings of God don't.
They don't make practical sense, you know, but what would you
tell a woman who does not evenknow how to take the first step
(41:23):
towards experiencing this lovingGod that you have described?
Speaker 1 (41:30):
Well, god will help you.
He will help you if you'reseeking him, if you want to know
the God that has helped me.
And you don't know God at all.
All I can tell you is to beopen about it.
You know to be a seeker, tojust say to yourself God, I want
(41:55):
to ask you.
I don't really believe in youand I don't really have any
knowledge.
I didn't grow up with religionin my household.
But I want to know what thislady is talking about and I want
to know if you're real or not.
And when you say those thingsto God, he will reveal himself
to you.
He loves people who are seekinghim and that word seek, s-e-e-k
(42:19):
.
Seeking God.
As long as you are seekinganswers, he will put people in
your path.
He will get the information toyou some way, because God is
always talking to everybodywho's ever been born anyway.
He has the Holy Spirit.
(42:39):
You may not understand aboutthe Holy Spirit, but the Holy
Spirit's job is to tap eachperson on their shoulder and say
God is real, god is real, godis real.
So the Holy Spirit is alreadytalking to you.
So when you get into a mode ofseeking, then God is going to
provide some way to get in touchwith you.
If you want to do it on your ownand you have a laptop or a
(43:03):
phone, get you know what theBible is.
Everybody knows the word Bible.
Get it out and just go to thebook of John.
Type in and Google the book ofJohn and just start reading John
one and read the whole storyabout Jesus Christ, because he's
the answer that you're lookingfor.
And if you have a Bible thatsomebody gave you, um, open it
(43:27):
up.
Turn to the book of John andread the story of Jesus, what he
did for your life and what youneed to understand that you need
to be seeking him and seekinganswers.
And a lot of people seek answersfrom astrology and looking in
the newspaper and finding theirbirth date and try to find that
(43:49):
there's no answers.
In that, some people try toseek other religions and try to
say well, you know, what aboutthis religion?
What about that religion?
What about this thing?
What about that religion?
And there is only.
I'm just going to say there'sonly one way to God, and that's,
and one way to heaven is that'sthrough his son, jesus Christ.
So you need to want to know whoJesus is, and some religions
(44:15):
don't want to even want tomention Jesus.
A lot of people get upset abouthis name, but that's the only
way that you're going to findout what I'm talking to you
about and you're responsible foryourself.
A lot of people were raised inhomes with no religion.
A lot of people were raisedwith other religions, but as an
adult, you are responsible tofind out the truth your own self
(44:38):
.
So you kind of have to say youknow, I want to find the right
way, I want to which?
Which one of these religions isthe right way, but I can tell
you about Jesus Christ.
He's the only religion that theperson gave his life and came
back alive.
None of the other religions orother ways to have a story like
(45:01):
that.
It's a very unique story and ifyou don't believe in Jesus,
there is historical evidencethat he did live historical
evidence and so you have to do alot of seeking.
You have to want to know yourown self and really be looking
for yourself and looking foranswers for yourself, because we
all are seeking.
(45:21):
I was seeking it at one time inmy life until I actually came
to the knowledge of Jesus Christ.
So if you don't know him at all, just start by Googling Jesus
or Googling the book of John inthe Bible, and just start there
and just start your own searchand you will definitely find the
(45:45):
answers there.
I can guarantee you, if you look, you will find the answers.
You can take that to the bankand cash it.
If you're looking for the rightanswers for your life, you're
looking for the way to God andyou heard about Jesus and you
heard a lot of people are kindof upset when I'm all well, who
is Jesus?
Who is Jesus?
He was really here and there'shistorical evidence that he was
(46:07):
here.
So do your homework, do yourinvestigation, start looking,
and as you're looking andinvestigating, then knowledge is
going to come into your mindand into your heart and you're
going to get answers to whatyou're looking for, as long as
you're seeking the answers.
Speaker 2 (46:23):
Yes, so good.
I'm reminded of how, when Ifound the Lord, I say that he
found me because I was seekingand he came and he got me.
He scooped me up.
He found me because I wasseeking and he came and he got
me.
He scooped me up, and Iremember I describe it as I had
(46:46):
to get to the point where Iwanted to know the truth more
than I wanted to defend mycurrent belief system.
You know, you got to be willingto lay your current belief
system aside to find the honestto God truth, and that's what
the Lord did for me and I knowthat that's what he does for all
who are seeking.
You want to know the truth.
He is true, and it's our job toto to keep our job.
Speaker 1 (47:06):
We're responsible for our own souls.
So if you die and you let'sjust say you die and you go to
heaven and you're like I mean,you don't go to heaven, you die
and here is the afterlife andyou go well, well God, why can't
I come to heaven?
He says, well, I sent you allthis information on Jesus and
everything.
But you know, that's not what Iwas raised in my household with
(47:26):
.
But as an adult, like I told,this is the perfect example.
I raised six kids and I was atough mom and I told my kids I
know I raised you right, but ifyou are wacky when you grow up,
you're responsible to get yousome counseling on your own.
If you feel that you are wackybecause I didn't do this as a
(47:47):
parent and you know it's becauseof my mother I said, if you
were wackadoodle when you growup, go get your own self some
counseling, get your own mindstraight now.
So I'm going to tell everybodywho doesn't really know Christ
either You're responsible foryour own soul.
You can't say, well, well, Iwasn't raised in that and I
didn't know anything aboutreligion.
You're an adult now and you'reresponsible for getting the
(48:11):
proper information or, like yousaid the truth.
Look up the truth.
Look, look in your own, yourother religion.
If you have an other religion,look at that.
Compare it to what you've heardabout Christians and look, do
your own homework and find outabout.
Well, did Jesus really live,like the scrolls and all these
(48:33):
scrolls that they're findingover there in the Holy land?
Do your own research and youwill get the information, cause
if you looking for God, he willmake it known to you.
He will make himself known toyou.
I.
I guarantee it, guarantee it.
Speaker 2 (48:47):
Yeah, it's like we take one step towards him.
He takes a thousand stepstowards us and that's just kind
of the way that I've seen, thathe is very willing to meet us.
You know, he's a.
Speaker 1 (48:59):
He's a God of love and but he is also very
mysterious.
You know, I tell God that allthe time.
I said God, you are verymysterious and you know it's a
lot to his personality andthere's a lot of things, the
words, that we use about him.
God is love, god is patient,god is the.
(49:22):
There's a lot of differentaspects about him, but one thing
about him is that he's holy andhe's a just God.
So you have to get yourselfstraight with God by
understanding that you don'thave a real relationship with
him.
So you need to repent.
That's a really big word,repentance.
(49:46):
And what does that mean?
It means that we need to besorry for the bad things that
we've done in our life, becausenobody is perfect, Nobody can
say that they're perfect.
So because you're not perfect,it's kind of hard for you to get
in touch with God.
So it is simple once you getthe information.
That's why you need to get aBible.
(50:06):
That's why you need to get thebook of John and you need to
study Jesus' life and see whathe was all about and what he did
.
They say this Jesus died on across.
For you.
You probably don't know whatthat means that you need to be
saved.
So you've got to be aninvestigator, a detective,
because you know why, becauseyour soul depends on it, because
(50:28):
once you die, that's it.
If you made a mistake, youcan't go.
Whoops, can I go back down toearth and go get those books and
and read and and go back?
There is no do-over.
So make sure that you know thetruth before you die.
And as and at this rate, there'sso many disasters happening you
(50:49):
know floods, hurricanes andthis, that and the other you,
you need to be ready because oneday we're all going to die.
I'm going to die, you're goingto die, we're all going to die.
But where are we going to be?
Are we going to be in heaven?
Are we going to be in hell?
So do your investigation now,while you have time.
You still have time and if youhave a phone, you can get the
(51:15):
Bible on the phone.
There's no excuses.
You don't have to go to theChristian bookstore and buy one.
Just get on your phone, type inBible, the book of John, and
just start reading.
Start somewhere, because youneed help now.
You're going through a lot ofhard times, a lot of
difficulties, and you're notmaking it on your own.
And for those who are suicidal,because I always have to say
this if there's anybody who issuicidal right now and you're
not making it on your own, andfor those who are suicidal,
because I always have to saythis, if there's anybody who is
(51:37):
suicidal right now and you feellike you can't make it to
tomorrow, please pick up yourphone and dial 988 and talk to
somebody.
There is help available.
Please, if you want, if youneed more help to help you, your
childhood trauma, find acounselor, go to a psychiatrist,
get a therapist.
That's what I did.
I did get help and it did helpme because I had a lot of
(52:00):
childhood trauma and and it tookme years to work out all of
that hurt that was in my heart,to sort it all out, and I have
to say that I have forgiven myparents totally.
Some people you even have toforgive them if they're already
in the grave.
You can't let them keepreaching out for you.
(52:21):
You got to solve these thingsin your heart so that you can
have peace.
So get yourself someprofessional help.
Don't be ashamed of it.
I used to be ashamed to tellpeople that I was in a mental
institution.
It was embarrassing.
I didn't want people to knowthat story.
But now I tell everybody.
Because why suffer?
Why suffer when there's helpavailable?
(52:42):
And some of the traumas thatwe've gone through, such as rape
, such as childhood trauma,molestations those things have
to be dealt with.
And these professional peoplethat's their profession they
really can help you through that.
But with that, you also needsomething for your soul, which
is where faith comes in, andhaving a relationship with God
(53:06):
and a relationship with Jesus.
And all of these things worktogether to give you the peace
that you are seeking and havebeen seeking in your life and to
help you get over all thetrauma.
There is a way out.
You got to work on it.
You got to work on it.
Speaker 2 (53:21):
Yes, amen, this has been so good.
Thank you so much.
So much wisdom.
Speaker 1 (53:27):
Well, I'm 72 years old.
I finally got some wisdom.
My mother said that I wouldn'tbe smart.
Eventually, you have a littleknowledge and I don't want other
people to suffer.
I don't want you to sufferneedlessly when I know that
there is help out there.
There's help secularly andthere's help biblically, and the
(53:48):
most help that you need is toknow God as your, as your father
, to know Jesus as your Lord andsavior.
That's where 99.99% of my helphas been, and a small portion of
that has been from counseling.
So, please, people, please goand get counseling if you need
(54:09):
it.
Don't be ashamed of it.
You know a lot of the athletesare mentioning now about mental
health.
It's it's it's so good thatpeople are talking about mental
health.
I'm so proud of Simone Bilesand um, there was another
swimmer, um, I forgot his name.
He was on the thing, he, he waslike the first one that says
I'm having a mental healthcrises and now it's like people
(54:32):
are going oh, other people aregetting help.
They're not ashamed to talkabout it.
So don't you be ashamed, youknow?
And if your church doesn't wantto talk about mental health
because I haven't gotten a wholelot of help from church as far
as having mental healthsituation, so sometimes you have
(54:55):
to go and find your health.
There are Christian counselorsout there that are excellent.
There are regular counselorsthat are excellent.
There's licensed social workers.
Now there's all kinds of traumapeople with.
For PTSD, there's all differentkinds of techniques, like CBT
therapy and all differenttherapies to help you to get to
a better place.
(55:16):
So take advantage of thosethings.
But your, your best help is toseek God first, and then he will
provide these people if that'sthe way that you want to go.
But get help for yourself.
Emotionally, you're responsiblefor your own self.
Sometimes nobody's going tohelp you, but you.
So it's.
We have these podcasts on that.
(55:36):
People come on and share theirstories with you.
Why?
Because they just want to talkabout it.
No, because they want to helpyou.
They want to give you the toolsso that you can go to get help,
so you're not sitting in yourhouse crying and boohooing to
the point where you're sodepressed that you can't even
function.
There's no need to be like that.
The point where you're sodepressed that you can't even
function.
There's no need to be like that.
(55:57):
There's help out there.
Thank you for having thesepodcasts to have a platform so
people know that they're notalone.
That there's other people.
There's other people that havegone through your trauma.
You're not alone in this andthere's a way out.
That's the important part.
There's a way out.
Speaker 2 (56:11):
There is a way out, okay.
So thank you so much.
I want to ask, if you don'tmind, would you close us out
with a prayer and then I'll haveyou share a little bit where
listeners could maybe find youor your work or whatever.
You have a link or somethinglike that.
But could you pray over thelistener?
Speaker 1 (56:29):
Oh sure.
Speaker 2 (56:30):
As we close out.
Speaker 1 (56:34):
We just give you all the praise, Heavenly Father.
I just thank you, Lord, thatyou provide with this new
technology that we have.
It's so amazing.
People, Lord, are usingtechnology for bad things, but,
Lord, there is so much goodthat's coming out of it and we
thank you for that.
So much good that's coming outof it and we thank you for that.
(56:57):
And I pray for each person thatis tuned into this podcast, Lord
, that I can even feel that someof them out there are just
hurting.
I even feel that some of themare just crying watching this
and listening to the things thatare being said, because you
know why, Because God touchedtheir heart.
I know that you're touchingthem.
I pray, Lord, for each personthat's listening, that's going
(57:18):
through things that you willjust please touch their heart,
their mind and their souls.
Just help them by the power ofyour Holy Spirit to let them get
the knowledge of you.
You are the answer, HeavenlyFather.
Touch them as they.
You are the answer, HeavenlyFather.
Touch them as they reach fortheir Bibles, as they reach out
and try to read the scripturesto get help for themselves.
(57:40):
Sometimes it's complex, buthelp them to understand the
things that you are saying tothem, because it's your love
letter to us, it's your help forus.
You have so much in there tohelp them.
So I pray, Lord, that they willhold on to their Bible, read
their Bible daily and try tounderstand what you have given
(58:04):
us to make it through.
And for those who do not knowChrist at all, those who don't
know anything about you, I prayfor them, Heavenly Father, that
you will just let them beseeking, that.
Give them a spirit of seeking toseek answers, to seek you, to
seek who you are, to seek whyyou sent somebody named Jesus to
(58:26):
this earth and what they did.
Please help them to understand.
And for everybody who isshedding a tear, I pray for
every tear that's falling fromsomebody's face right now.
Lord, I just pray that youwould just give them a hug, Just
let them feel your love, thatyou are real, that you do care
(58:47):
about them, that you understandthat the pain that they're going
through, the suffering thatthey're going through.
You understand that, Lord, andthat you are there for them.
Lord, we just thank you forthis time that this sister and I
have had together and we justagree together to pray that
people will be healed from thethings that they have heard
(59:10):
today and from the many otherpodcasts that's been on here,
and we ask this all these thingsin Jesus name, Amen and amen.
Speaker 2 (59:19):
Amen.
Well, that's a wrap on anotherincredible episode.
What a testimony.
I love how the Lord connects mewith these wonderful women who
I feel like we've known eachother for years, and hopefully
that comes through with you too.
I think that's the way it iswhen we connect through the
spirit of God, you know.
Anyways, I want to add thatbecause Tanya and I just talked
(59:42):
our way off of this episode, youknow, I had to cut it off
somewhere and I realized that Inever actually had her drop her
links, and so I'm just going todirect you to her blog page.
I'm just going to direct you toher blog page.
Her blog isgodspeaks-i-listencom.
I will include all of the linksto connect with this wonderful
woman of God in the show notesand, in the meantime, if you
(01:00:07):
would like to be on the podcast,you can go to
newcreationpodcastcom andconnect with me there.
Or, better yet, just send me aDM.
Go to my Instagram atjimmyslachelle, send me a DM
there and let's connect.
No-transcript.
(01:16:13):
No-transcript.
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