A Pretty Good Seltzer Review Podcast: Five Stars

Picture it: A sunny fall day. You're about to bite into the juiciest, crispiest, most delicious apple you've ever tasted. SIKE! You've opened a can of Fuji Apple flavored Spindrift. It's Sparkling Water AND Real Fruit. Because, allegedly, "real fruit tastes better". Music by Steven O'Brien.

Did you have fun on your Target run? You would if you picked up a case of Target's house brand Good & Gather Watermelon Lime sparkling water. It's a summer flavor in December, but we drink for the weather we want. Will drinking summer flavors help with Seasonal Affective Disorder? Probably not. There aren't any studies out there that definitively support that claim. Music by Steven O'Brien

Look, it's not a seltzer but who makes the rules around here? Me. I do. So sodas count. To celebrate Thanksgiving, Elle sips on a holiday-themed flavor. Cranberries are relevant to Thanksgiving so, again, it still counts. Thanks to listener Linda J. for the four-pack of Cranberry Fizz by Poppi. Music by Steven O'Brien.

It's Lime. It's Mint. It's one shot of rum shy of an actual mojito. Is it the ingredients they add to make it taste like rock sweat? Or is it that one of the ingredients is bioengineered? Elle sips on skinny can of Lime with Mint Extract by Topo Chico and answers the question, "Is it any good?" Music by Steven O'Brien.

Okay, so it isn't really the time of year for Mango, but we drink for the weather we want here at Seltzer HQ. While the temps have dipped below 50 degrees Fahrenheit, in our hearts it is still breezy and tropical. It's mango all the way down. Music by Steven O'Brien

What even is a pink apple? Is it different than a Pink Lady Apple? Does it matter? In this episode, Elle pops the top on an unusual flavor from a long-standing classic: Polar. Did anyone at Polar Corporate name the bear? If so, why is the name not Bubbles? Music by Steven O'Brien

Not a seltzer, not a sparkling water, not a mineral water, not a sparkling American spring water with carbonation... It's sparkling hibiscus. If it bubbles, it's directly in our purview here at Seltzer HQ. The team at Ruby must have access to something beyond our planet because despite sourcing ingredients from planet earth, they claim to have awareness of extraterrestrial flavor. Music by Steven O'Brien

To continue celebrating the magnificent cherry blossoms, Elle is tasting three Black Cherry bubbly beverages. On deck is Black Cherry by Waterloo, Black Cherry by Crystal Geyser, and Black Cherry by Polar. Episode also contains a dispatch from the Bubbly Beat. Thank you to listeners on the other coast! Music by Steven O'Brien

Spring has sprung! Could it be all of the drinking for the weather we want? Probably not, but here we are. This week, Elle pops the top on Cherry Blossom by LaCroix and waxes poetic about the fleeting moment the cherry blossoms reach their peak and then fall. Seltzer springs eternal. Music by Steven O'Brien.

This week Elle sips on the zesty citrus gem from Good & Gather, Yuzu Mandarin. Full disclosure, she only looked up what a yuzu was AFTER purchasing and drinking most of the case of sparkling water. The pictures were enticing enough!

It's a classic summer flavor that brings sunshine straight to your mouth. Lemon by Spindrift is not just sparkling water, it's also real squeezed fruit. That's it, that's all that is in the can. There's no actual sunshine inside, but if you imagine for just a moment you can almost taste the sun's warm ripening rays kissing the rind of the lemons that were squeezed into this can.

Let's get tropical, everybody! This is a special tall can, a seasonal limited edition from Polar. Pineapple and Guava are a familiar and delicious flavor pairing that are essential summer flavors. Thanks to listener Christine in Los Angeles, California for this submission!

No, not BUBLÉ. BUBLY. These sips don't lie. On this episode, Elle sips on Cherry by Bubly. The can is so friendly that you can't help but smile while you enjoy the effervescent experience of this sparkling water. Pop the "heyo" tab open and dive into cheerful cherry refreshment. Steven O'Brien plays our theme song.

Who's the star of summer? Strawberry, that's who. We are still drinking for the weather we want with this summery flavor. Elle shares her useless but interesting skill for memorizing advertising jingles from 90s commercials. Steven O'Brien plays us out.

It's not technically a seltzer, this one is 92% sparkling water with 8% real squeezed fruit. On this episode we learn a little bit about what a blood orange is, confirm that it does not contain blood, and realize that perhaps Elle has Citrus Taste Blindness. Spindrift makes a very bold claim about real fruit tasting better, but better than what? That's just, like, your opinion man. Steven O'Brien plays us out.