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July 10, 2025 14 mins

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"Who am I outside of caregiving?" This question haunts many family caregivers as they navigate the all-consuming journey of caring for a loved one. Drawing from my personal experience of caring for my father with Alzheimer's for 14 years, I unpack the struggle to maintain our sense of self when someone else's needs dominate our days and decisions.

Caregiving has a way of rewriting your identity without permission. Suddenly, you're an advocate, a nurse, a scheduler, and an emotional support system—but somewhere in that transformation, crucial parts of yourself can slip away unnoticed. I share how I realized I had stopped journaling, reading before bed, and connecting with friends—not just activities I'd lost, but pieces of my identity quietly disappearing.

The path to reclaiming and protecting your identity starts with confronting the myths that trap us: the belief that doing anything less than everything means we're failing; the notion that we should just press pause on ourselves until caregiving ends; and the guilt that whispers self-care is selfish. These lies keep us from the truth—that we are whole people whose worth transcends our caregiving role.

Through practical strategies like creating a personal manifesto based on core values, establishing healthy boundaries, and dedicating even five minutes a week to nurturing dreams, caregivers can maintain connection with their authentic selves. Remember, caregiving doesn't define you—it's a season in your life, not the entirety of who you are.

Whether you're in the thick of caregiving or transitioning to life afterward, your story continues to unfold. Download the free core values worksheet from our show notes at seasonofcaring.com/podcast and begin reconnecting with the heart of who you are today. Your identity matters, your dreams still have purpose, and you are so much more than the care you provide.

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