Teaser for EP. 2: The Similarity of Cults and Abusive Relationships Between Two People

Have you ever considered the eerie parallels between cults and abusive relationships? Grasping these connections could be the first step in safeguarding yourself or someone you love. Our latest episode features a riveting conversation with a distinguished expert and author, who illuminates the manipulative tactics employed by both cult leaders and abusive partners. With their insights, we unravel the psychological threads that bind victims to their abusers, from the insidiousness of gaslighting to the forced isolation that strips away one's sense of self.

Dive deep into the mechanisms of control and the strategies for empowerment as our guest elaborates on concepts like Lifton's "thought reform" and the phenomenon of mystical manipulation. Whether it's the subtle undermining of personal relationships or the abrupt uprooting to unfamiliar environments, this episode exposes the consistent patterns used to dominate and control. This isn't just an informative discussion—it's an essential guide for recognizing and resisting the signs of coercive control, in intimate partnerships and beyond. Tune in and equip yourself with the knowledge to break the cycle of manipulation.

Cult expert, author and educator, Rick Alan Ross, explains how the dynamic of a destructive cult parallels an abusive relationship - "Think of it as a cult with one leader and one follower."  Learn how destructive cults work and red flags in any unhealthy relationship, in the full episode: "What's the Meaning of Life?"

On this season of "We're Not Blowing Hot Air," we’re zoned in on mental wellness as we explore some of life’s biggest, most important questions with fascinating guests. Subscribe to the Oxygen Plus channel so you catch our colorful, curious explorations of this thing called Life with our remarkable guests.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
As you've mentioned, it's a lot like what happens in
an abusive relationship.
Yes, I mean, if you knowsomeone that's in an abusive
controlling relationship and Ihave a chapter about this in my
book they are very typicallyvery deeply narcissistic people,
abusive controlling partners,they lack empathy, they lack

(00:23):
sympathy, very much like a cultleader.
And in the same way that a cultbreaks people down, changes
them and then isolates them andreinforces that change, an
abusive controlling partner cando the same thing.
It's been called gaslighting,what Lifton calls in the book

(00:46):
Thought Reform, the Psychologyof Totalism, mystical
Manipulation or Plan Spontaneity, which is the controlling
partner.
The abusive partner issystematically chipping away at
the person's self-esteem, makingcalculated comments to make
them feel that they're a loser,that they're not really that

(01:12):
intelligent, that they're stupid, and so the abusive controlling
partner is breaking them downso that they can then change
them.
And so frequently an abusivecontrolling partner will say
things like well, why do youhang out with those old
girlfriends?
Or I don't like that guy, Ithink he's after you, or can't

(01:35):
we spend more time together?
Or let's move and move toanother city.
And that is socially isolatingthe person who's being abused,
so they're being cut off fromold friends and family in a new
environment controlled by theabusive controlling partner.
So if you know someone that'sin an abusive controlling

(01:58):
relationship, you can drawparallels between that
relationship which is, if youwill, a cult with one leader and
one follower and extrapolatethat to a cult with one leader
and many followers.
But the techniques, themanipulation for control is the

(02:18):
same.