Episode Transcript
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SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
This is a worldbone.
unknown (00:04):
This is a world on
that.
SPEAKER_01 (00:08):
I'm Jeff Fallenwolf.
Welcome to A World Gone Mad.
It's Wednesday and this isnormally the WTF episode.
You know the one where I usuallytalk about what the fuck Donald
Delusional and his supportersare doing to us and how any of
this could hurt us.
(00:29):
But this episode because of theholidays, I want to go in a
different direction.
I want to talk aboutincompetence.
WTF, what the fuck happened tocompetency?
This time of year is supposed tobe magical.
Lights, music, family,gratitude.
(00:54):
And instead this December,America becomes a giant
incompetence obstacle course.
You can't get a straight answer.
You can't get a human being.
You can't get a problem solved.
And if you dare try to upgradeyour phone, may the odds be ever
(01:16):
in your favor.
Somewhere along the way,competence packed a suitcase,
left the country, and didn'teven leave a note with its
forwarding address on therefrigerator.
This isn't political, this isn'teconomic.
This is a national skillshortage so bad it should be
(01:38):
classified as an endangeredspecies.
And the holidays make it tentimes worse because everybody's
overwhelmed, understaffed,undertrained, and existing on
fumes.
Now let me give you a real lifeexample that pushed me over the
(01:59):
edge this week.
My girlfriend and I, two adults,reasonably intelligent, able to
operate heavy machinery, triedto do something simple.
Upgrade our old iPhones, notstart a company, not build a
rocket, not negotiate worldpeace.
(02:24):
Just upgrade two older iPhonesto new ones through Verizon.
And this turned into a nine-hourmulti-part miniseries.
Four phone calls, two in-personstore visits, conflicting
answers, agents who swore theyfixed it, only for the next
(02:47):
agent from Verizon to say, Idon't see what happened, what
you say, sir, in our systemanywhere.
Even after each person I talkedwith left extensive notes in the
database.
It was like I was talking toghosts.
At one point it felt like theVerizon people were reading from
a script written by amalfunctioning Roomba.
(03:10):
Meanwhile, all my girlfriend andI wanted was the same thing
millions of people want duringthe holidays.
In this case, a simple upgradeof our iPhone, where our emails
would update in a timelyfashion, and we don't have to
wait for carrier pigeons todeliver each individual message
to us.
(03:31):
Nine hours, three separate days,nine, spent on this fiasco of
upgrading two iPhones.
That's an entire workday.
That's a flight to London.
That's a Lord of the Rings moviemarathon.
And my favorite part of thisincident after talking to
(03:53):
multiple people at Verizontrying to get this fixed was the
text message I received thismorning after two weeks trying
to solve this.
Hello from Verizon, the textmessage said.
We have reviewed your request toensure you receive consistent,
dedicated support, and to avoidinvolving multiple
(04:16):
representatives, we kindly askthat you refrain from calling us
back.
Your needs will be handled fromstart to finish by one single
point of contact.
Please don't involve multiplepeople from Verizon.
That's what the text messagesaid.
Don't refrain from calling usback.
(04:40):
Which is what I was trying to doin the first place.
Deal with one person.
And at the end of it, you're noteven mad anymore.
You're just spirituallyexhausted.
Trying to remember what you weretrying to do when you started
all of this.
My girlfriend and I were lookingforward to the excitement of
getting two new moderntechnology phones until this
(05:01):
Fellini movie with Verizonoccurred.
And this is happeningeverywhere.
It's not just Verizon, it's notApple, it's not Best Buy.
It's happening in fast foodlocations, retail, restaurants.
It's the entire ecosystem ofAmerican customer service
nowadays.
(05:21):
You call the pharmacy.
They don't know where yourprescription is, even though
they texted and left you a phonemessage saying your prescription
is ready to pick up.
You call your doctor.
They tell you the nextappointment's April 2037.
And let me give you anotherreal-world example from this
(05:42):
past week.
I called the office of myorthopedic specialist because
they said I owed$25.
I called them and asked why.
They told me it was for myfollow-up office visit that I
failed to show up for.
I told them I never scheduled afollow-up office visit after the
(06:04):
first time I saw the doctor.
And we went back and forth likea merry-go-round, like I was
trapped in the twilight zone,and we never got anywhere.
I told them I'm not paying$25for something I didn't schedule.
They told me I have 30 days topay.
(06:26):
In competence in all areas ofour lives.
You call the airline.
They suggest you download theirapp because apparently you're
the customer and the employeenow.
We're doing half their jobs forthem.
The new American trainingmanuals, if confused, blame the
(06:47):
computer.
If the customer pushes back, putthem on hold.
If the customer calls back,pretend you never heard of the
problem in the first place.
And the holidays magnify it.
Everything's overloaded.
Everyone's short staffed.
Half the country's coughing, theother half's traveling.
(07:09):
So when you need help withanything, anything, you're
entering a seasonal incompetencevortex.
Your package is late?
Holiday volume.
Your appointment got canceled?
Holiday staffing.
Your new phone upgrade turnedinto a nine hour documentary?
(07:30):
Holiday chaos.
It's the only time of the yearwhere incompetence gets wrapped
in tinsel and sold as a festiveinconvenience.
This is the WTF of today's show.
We've lost basic operationalcompetence in America.
And we're all pretending this isjust how things are now.
(07:52):
It's not.
It's unacceptable.
The bar used to be to do the jobright.
And now the bar is set at justdon't make it worse.
We're living in a country wherethe phrase, I actually fixed it
for you, sir.
Sounds like a miracle.
And the irony (08:12):
the more
technology we add, the less
anything works.
You walk into a grocery storeand there are 15 checkout lines
at the front, but only threecashiers manning them.
Everyone's on a break, or thestore didn't hire enough staff
(08:34):
for the holidays.
So here's my holiday message toeveryone.
If you manage to get throughDecember without spending nine
hours trying to upgrade yourphone, without screaming at an
AI voice system, withouthearing, I'm sorry, our system's
down, or we'll get to you in afew minutes.
(08:57):
Our average wait time is threehours.
You're one of the chosen ones.
May the odds be ever in yourfavor.
Because competency left thebuilding, and nobody knows when
it's coming back.
And honestly, why would it comeback?
When the guy who built an entiremovement on arrogance, on
(09:20):
hatred, on not caring aboutanyone, is still out there
spreading that same attitudelike confetti.
Of course, I'm talking about theman in charge.
Donald Trump lowered the bar sofar that half the country now
thinks efforts optional.
(09:40):
Compassion's weakness.
And doing your job well is somekind of liberal plot.
Let's make America great again,shall we?
Thank you, Donald Trump, foryour nonstop contribution to a
culture where millions of peopledon't give a crap.
(10:03):
Don't try, don't care, and don'teven pretend to.
Trump's attitude has spilled outinto the bloodstream of this
country.
And now we're living with theside effects every day.
The stress, the chaos, and theincompetency that's flooded
(10:24):
every corner of American life.
Make America great again, right?
We can't even get customerservice to call us back.
Would love to hear from some ofyou with your thoughts.
You know how to reach me, yougot an email, you got a
toll-free number.
Uh, would be nice to before theend of the year hear some
(10:47):
feedback from you.
That's your WTF Wednesday.
This is a world gone mad.
I'm Jeff Allen Wolfe.
I'll be back Friday.
I say the shit that no one elsewill because I don't care who I
may piss off.
I'm not mainstream media, no BS,no talking points, no fake
(11:12):
headlines.
The truth has to be told.
Until then, Wolfpack listeners,remain skeptical, keep focused,
but most of all, stay hopeful.
SPEAKER_00 (11:25):
There is chaos in
the world.
Can't you see?
And we need to stand up andpreserve our demon see.
This is a world under this is awell.