Send us a Text Message about the podcast
Want to leave a profound legacy for your family? Discover the key elements of building a rich family legacy as I explore the biblical, social, and cultural aspects of this legacy. Drawing inspiration from the story of Paul and Timothy in 1 Timothy, together we uncover the importance of belonging, heritage, purpose, reputation, and recognizing our unique creation by God.
In this thought-provoking conversation, we discuss the impact of seeking personal growth, the power of mentorship, and the beauty of seeing our children and others achieve more than we ever could. Plus, we emphasize the importance of cultivating a culture of celebration and support, empowering future generations to excel.
But what about the relationships between seniors, youth, and the intergenerational aspects of legacy building? I try to help us understand the benefits of these connections, and how they create a solid foundation for young people to find their purpose and place in the world. Learn about encouraging our youth to strive for purity, faithfulness, and love, and how to bridge the generational gap for a positive impact. Let's build a legacy that will resonate with generations to come.
#legacy #family
Leave review
Follow and Share
Send Text Message
New Website
Buy Me A Coffee
#abovethenoise24
# faith
#reconciliation
#race
#racialreconciliation
We appreciate your support: Buy Me A Coffee
Stay in touch:
- Email us at: abovethenoise24@gmail.com
- Facebook: @abovethenoise24
- Instagram: abovethenoise24
Podcast art by Mario Christie.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Grantley Martelly (00:09):
Welcome to Above the Noise, a podcast at
the intersection of faith, raceand reconciliation, and I'm your
host, Grantley Martelly.
This episode of Above the Noisecenters around the topic of
(00:32):
building a family legacy.
It is an audio file of arecording from a television
broadcast that was broadcast onthe Caribbean Broadcasting
Corporation television inBarbados in November of 2022,
when I was invited to be a gueston the program called Family
Forum, hosted by the Church ofNazarene.
(00:52):
The host of the program areReverend Martell Farley and
Reverend Anderson Kelman.
We're each building a legacy,whether we're doing it
intentionally or simply byliving our lives.
They're parts of our legacythat we have control over, and
the other parts of our legacythat come about because of just
where we live, who we are, thethings that we're doing.
(01:14):
Join us as we explore thebiblical, social and cultural
aspects of leaving a rich legacy, and I hope that you enjoy the
program as much as I enjoyedhaving a conversation with
Reverend Farley and withReverend Kelman.
Good to be here, good to beback in Barbados, good to be
(01:35):
back home, like we say, on therock and seeing friends and
family.
I'm actually here for thisvisit.
We had our family reunion, theseventh family reunion that
we've had.
We have one every three yearssomewhere in the world And this
one we decided to come back toBarbados, where it started in
(01:57):
2001.
We get together to honor andremember those who have gone
before, specifically our mothers, and some of you may know her
Sister, madeline Leon, who was amember of Hallsville Church of
the Nazarene for over 50 years.
So today we're going to talkabout legacy.
So we honored her legacy And weencourage our young people and
(02:20):
our brothers and sisters toremember that we have a legacy,
and I want to talk to you todayabout that.
There's a number of differentplaces that the Bible talks
about legacy, includingDeuteronomy, where Farley read
from.
But I want to talk to you from1 Timothy, chapter one, where
Paul is talking to Timothy aboutlegacy.
(02:40):
We don't always read it thatway because sometimes the
ministers you know they teach ustheology.
Timothy was a pastor.
Paul was teaching him how to bea pastor, but if you look at it
, he's also talking about hislegacy, right?
Because of these five pointsthat I notice here, the first
one is that he has a place tobelong.
We all need a place to belong.
(03:01):
So Paul is telling him youbelong here in 1 Timothy and 2
Timothy.
He called him a son.
You're my son, you're a fellowworker, you're a companion,
which means you have a place tobelong And legacy is always tied
to a place and to people, whereyou're from.
What are you trying to remember?
How were you brought up?
(03:21):
The things that you werebrought up to be, but also your
present there.
How do you connect?
You connect in the family.
Paul called him his son.
You know that Paul used Timothyin many ways as a son And a
fellow worker.
He even called him by one timea bond servant.
Right, bond servant means nowyou no longer carry in letters
(03:41):
back and forth, but you're nowon the road and you're getting
the beatings and you're gettingthe criticism like everybody
else, but even in all of thatyou belong here.
If you ever need a place to be,you know you have me and you
have the other brothers andsisters in the fellowship.
The second thing that we seeabout Timothy that Paul says is
(04:02):
you have a heritage, a godlyheritage.
He refers him back to hismother and his grandmother.
He says remember yourgrandmother, your grandmother
Lois and your mother Eunice.
And he said remember theirstrong faith.
So that means they were active,they were strong, they taught
him well, they imparted to him.
(04:24):
Their faith was active.
And now he says you have thatheritage and he'll go on to say
in the next point that I see itin you, right.
So he reminded him that, firstof all, you have a place to
belong.
Secondly, you have a place tolook forward to.
You have that heritage to lookback to, that grandmother, that
mother who taught you.
(04:44):
We know that in the Jewishtradition, the father was
supposed to teach the childrenthe Torah, but we also know that
the mother spent more time withthe children.
So the father may come in andteach the Torah in the afternoon
at the dinner table, but duringthe day the mother and the
grandmother is actually teachingthe children how to put that
(05:06):
into practice, right?
So he learned a lot from hismother and grandmother, as well
as from his dad.
The third point we see is thatyou have a purpose in life.
You set the fan into flame,that which was placed in you,
right?
You have a purpose.
We see it in you now.
We encourage you to do it Now.
How did Paul and the team helphim to do that?
(05:26):
First of all, we know thatTimothy was used to run messages
back and forth between thedifferent churches.
He probably carried Paul's bag,or he probably, you know he was
along.
You know, if every were littlekids and we wanted to follow the
big people along, they'll giveyou like a purse or a bag or
said bring this.
You know, you want to helparound the house.
And even though the Bibledoesn't say all these in detail,
(05:48):
we know in history, if you goback and look at the history of
that time, that the Bible doestalk about this, that the older
people are supposed to mentorthe younger people and bring
them along.
Right, and it was an oralsociety, so things were
communicated orally and by doing, you know, jesus learned to be
a carpenter, a builder, acontractor from his father.
(06:10):
Right, father, probably thefirst one to put a hammer in his
hand.
And that's probably whathappened to Timothy when he's
saying fan into flame that whichhas been called, but laying on
of hands.
The laying on of hands didn'tput the gift in Timothy, the
laying on of hands just helpedto pull it out further, right?
So now the you know, they saythere's smoke, there's fire.
(06:31):
So they're saying we want, youknow, it's time for you to stop
just smoking or those things.
We want to see some fire comingout of you.
Because the fourth point isbecause you have a purpose in
life and you have a reputationto protect.
God has called you to dosomething.
He's put you in a place We'regoing to help you get there.
But now you're old enough thatyou need to start acting on that
(06:54):
.
You need to start maturing that.
You need to start getting outthere and doing what you're
supposed to do so that we canhelp guide you and continue to
bless you and to support you.
Right, protect what you havelearned.
And he said entrust it totrustworthy people.
And that is a good part of alegacy there.
His grandmother entrusted it tohis mother, who entrusted it to
him.
And now Paul is saying entrustit to Godly man who can help you
(07:17):
do the work.
So you see, this legacy isbuilding.
And then the fifth thing is thatwe are all created uniquely.
Psalm 139, verse 14 and 17,.
It's according to 16 says weare fearfully and wonderfully
made.
So God has created each personfor a unique purpose And there
is some things in life thatnobody else can accomplish
(07:39):
besides you.
So we have some overlappingthings.
You may be in ministry together, we may know people together,
but there's certain things thatonly I can do, only certain
things that you can do, onlycertain things, because that
sphere of influence is you,right.
So God uniquely made us to dothat and to be there.
And Paul was reminding himTimothy, you are the one we are
(07:59):
placing here, right.
And if you go on further, yousee Timothy is in this church
and he's saying you need to dealwith the false teachings, you
need not to be intimidated.
In verse 14, it tells him bebold in what you do, don't let
people put you down, becausethat flame in you is put there
by God And even though you maybe the youngest in many rooms,
that doesn't mean that you'renot called to do it.
(08:22):
So the final thing about legacyis, whether we realize it or not
, whether we accept it or not,or whether we're intentional
about it or not, we're eachbuilding a legacy every day, a
legacy of the summation of allthe parts of our life the good,
the bad and the ugly that isleft behind that people remember
us for.
And the thing that peopleremember us for they'll remember
(08:44):
if you leave some money,they'll remember if you leave a
house or a car.
All those things are going tofade away.
But long after those thingshave faded away, they're going
to remember who we were, theperson we were, how we treated
people, how we love people,whether we were kind or whether
we were gentle, whether you werea person that people could come
to for help, or whether theyknow that you're going to be the
(09:04):
person that's spreading all thethings to everybody.
You hear this and you hear thatright, and one of the things
that I would like for my life iswhen I am dead.
I've heard some people pass tome and I heard some people say
good riddance, and that commentis a comment of legacy.
That means that that person hadsuch a legacy that people were
(09:28):
glad that they were no longerthere, and I don't want my life
to be that.
I want, when I die, that peopleremember, not necessarily miss
me and put up walls and plaquesto me, but that my life mattered
in somebody else's life to helpthem to become a better person.
Anderson Kellman (09:45):
Mm-hmm Well that's, that's, that's powerful.
Yes, what I'm teaching there,but practical teaching, though,
because one of the things I wassaying is that, whether or not
you realize it, you know legacy,yeah Right, and that's for good
or for bad, mm-hmm.
Grantley Martelly (10:04):
Right.
Anderson Kellman (10:04):
They want what was said, though by a bit more
telling, in terms of the wholeissue of a trusting legacy to
faithful men, Mm-hmm.
You want to talk about it alittle more though, because I am
thinking that you know itsounds intentional.
(10:26):
It sounds as though, as anindividual, we have to be almost
creative about legacy Mm-hmmAnd ensure that There's not a
left to chance.
There's a left to chance.
Grantley Martelly (10:39):
Right, yeah, yeah.
So that's a really interestingpoint.
Right, because part of this isthere's certain things about our
legacy and our life that wecontrol.
That's right.
And there's certain things thatwe don't control.
That's good.
And many times we spend a lotof time on the things we don't
control, trying to change,unfortunately, unfortunately.
But if you, what?
if we focus intentionally onthe things that we do control,
(11:00):
yeah, how you control again, howyou treat people, how we appear
, how we respond, do we respondor do we react?
You know, and the other thingabout legacy is that we are not
perfect, so legacy doesn't meanthat everything about you is
perfect.
We're going to have our goodtimes on a bad time, good days
and bad days, and coming torealize that, as believers, as
men and women, that sometimesour bad days, how we respond to
(11:24):
those, say more about us thanhow we do our good days.
So the intentionality then youknow to pass it on is what can I
control?
What are the things that I cando?
Can I impart something tosomebody else?
Can I help somebody elsesucceed better than me?
That's one of the things wetalk about at our final reunion.
You know, sometimes it's notalways about me.
Sometimes I am put in the placeto help you.
(11:47):
Not just come alongside me, buthelp propel you ahead of me.
Martel Farley (11:54):
Because really it's almost like a network, yeah
, like the whole team has afunction.
Anderson Kellman (12:01):
Now.
Martel Farley (12:01):
You said just now each person is unique, so if
each person get to understandtheir role and their function,
then it makes a legacy richer.
Grantley Martelly (12:11):
Makes a legacy richer.
that's right, We're going tocome back and eliminate it.
Martel Farley (12:15):
It's a topic that we find very interesting, as
you have shown us quickly.
Right in the world, we have theinformation of legacy.
Anderson Kellman (12:24):
One of the things that really impacted on
me is the whole personal growth,and personal growth is not just
for the individual alone, it'sfor the individual group The
people around us.
Yes, Because we are a part ofthe system And we are part of
(12:44):
that system And therefore, whenwe grow and change and become
the best version of ourselves,then we are part of the system
in a more positive way And soour personal growth has
significant impact on thosewellness and the stability.
Grantley Martelly (13:12):
It does.
When we grow and we becomebetter.
We surround ourselves withpeople who help us become better
.
Part of our personal growth isrealizing that there have been
other people who poured into ourlives to make us who we are, to
make us better.
So he's saying to now pay thatforward and trust it to
trustworthy people And thattrustworthy I mean we can do a
(13:35):
whole section on that Because tofind a trustworthy person
you've got to begin to knowtheir character.
You've got to begin to know whothey are.
That's why Parker wrote allthese things about Timothy.
They spent so much timetogether that he was talking
about character.
He was a person of integrity.
So how do you help?
How do you find those peopleand then entrust it into them?
What I've learned in my life isthat sometimes you find those
(13:58):
people because they findthemselves, They come and
they're attached to you, Theyshow you the self.
Sometimes some of the people wethink are going to be the
greatest at something or not,And the one we think are going
to be the least or the one whoreally catch on to it, And
that's the one we end up pouringourselves into right.
But the other thing I wasfocusing on before the break.
Was that coming to the point inlife where we are comfortable
(14:22):
and at peace to watchingsomebody we help go farther than
we were?
Whoa, Yeah Right.
Martel Farley (14:30):
This means that we have to have perception And
it cannot be a competition Right, and the whole idea of wanting
the person to be propelled forthat you are means that you
can't have that sense ofcompetition Right.
I'm not actually talking abouthealthy competition.
Healthy competition I supposethere's room for that as well,
(14:51):
right?
Grantley Martelly (14:52):
But the whole idea of jealousy, yeah, which
is what Timothy Paul was talkingabout.
Timothy, right, he's trying topropel him ahead of him.
Martel Farley (14:58):
Yes, but I'm talking about jealousy.
Grantley Martelly (15:00):
Yeah, yeah, jealousy is the negative part.
Martel Farley (15:02):
It can undermine the legacy.
If you want to say that.
Anderson Kellman (15:05):
Yeah, but I also see we have to have a real
perspective as well.
Yeah, We're going where youwant to get, because in our
Western construct we're veryindividualistic, right, right,
and so we think about ourselves,or beginning or end what we
accomplish.
But I think what we're sharingthis afternoon is we'll see
(15:30):
things more in terms of a morefamily, a more opposite kind of
family, a family context Yeah,not just me.
Right, the we, every generation.
We should get better, we shouldbecome stronger.
Yeah, we should be moreinfluential.
We should connect better peoplegenerally.
(15:51):
So it's a more, it's a muchbroader perspective, a broader
perspective.
Grantley Martelly (15:55):
Yeah, now we need to become comfortable with
it, right?
Especially as believers, weshould become comfortable with
seeing other people propel inour faith, propel in their faith
stronger and maybe even learnfrom them, maybe that person
that you led to Christ, maybe aperson who can help you through
a struggle, because God is giftto them with something that we
(16:16):
don't have.
But that's not easy, right,it's not easy to see people move
ahead of us.
It's not always easy, becausewe need to be taught to work
hard And we will always be ahead, especially if you're older.
But think about the beauty ofwe were talking before this.
You've seen your children gofarther than you even went.
(16:38):
I find joy in that to see mychildren doing things that I
only imagined, and some of themthat I couldn't even imagine.
Right, and see them doing thatAnd I'm like, wow, they're so
far ahead of me.
Martel Farley (16:53):
Yeah, it means also that one of the things that
we have to do more of is to becelebrate.
Celebrate, yeah, celebrate whathappens in a family, it doesn't
matter who it's from, all theway it may be.
A child comes from a university, you celebrate it.
You get a new job, youcelebrate And, of course, so
(17:15):
that becomes a culture ofcelebration.
If something happens, youadvertise And, because it's not
only the good things that youzero in on, the things that are
made may happen that arenegative.
Right, you want to even placeand see well, how can it help to
make things better?
Grantley Martelly (17:32):
You walk beside what we say, those lower
times, right, knowing thatwithin them, like Paul said,
there's a flim, there's a,there's a spark in there That's
going to burst into a flim Andmaybe this trial is the flame,
is this Catalyst that's going tocause that thing to burst into
a flame and that person's goingto come out of that much
stronger than they went in.
But we also be walked with them.
(17:53):
We don't just send them on Yeah, got your back and leave them.
We walk with them through it.
So if they need a hand for alittle bit of time, we put them
along, yeah.
But then you get to the pointwhere you fling of my head.
I say, alright, you just comethrough that, keep going, buddy.
Martel Farley (18:05):
It makes a journey more practical, real,
you know.
Anderson Kellman (18:11):
I want to, to be an advocate, not a devs
advocate, it's an advocate.
And I will ask the question,though Is there, is there
Something that has to be broken?
You know, in our, in ourgenerations, to first think that
(18:34):
they're thinking?
It's what I mean with that.
I find that that often timesthat they, they seem like in
fighting in families, i see ageneration as well.
It seems as though, you know,persons don't talk to each other
.
The ambience of one another,and it's a general sense of poor
(18:59):
, don't tear down.
And as one thing, though, ifmaybe It's a spirit dimension in
this whole idea of legacy thathas to be corrected, broken So
that we as So, yes, families can.
(19:19):
Yeah, i'm getting the processthat you talked about, because I
am seeing, i'm seeing awonderful benefits I'm seeing,
i'm seeing things like, like,families give us gosh the
families, you know.
I'm seeing families educatingfamilies, you know.
But it's not just about me.
You know, i met one family Imean, i'm a customer that I see
well, you know, and she's achance to become a new surgeon,
(19:44):
you know, and as a family, as a,you know, our parents can do
that, but collectively could behelp.
Martel Farley (19:55):
So what about?
what about?
I mean without seeing contextWhat about families sharing
finances?
Grantley Martelly (20:01):
Yeah, yeah, that's part of the.
I think one needs to be brokenI mean, if you want to talk
spiritually, deeply, spiritualtheological right that spirit of
Selfishness, right aboutpossible selfishness, and needs
to be broken by the Holy Spiritto realize that There is enough
in the world to go around forall of us.
(20:23):
The fact that you succeed, orthat your, your cousin, becoming
your surgeon, doesn't mean thatyou're less, yeah, doesn't mean
that what you're doing doesn'tmatter as much.
Right, so can you?
can you let go of that and notbe so competitive, realizing
that When one person in ourfamily succeed, the whole family
succeed?
Martel Farley (20:43):
It also means we have to value The different gift
in different gift in here, herein the, in our context, there
are Caribbean culture.
We put a lot of emphasis on theacademics.
Yeah, that's right I might havesomebody in a family who's a
wonderful artisan.
Should he see himself asimportant as My other brother
(21:08):
who was a professor?
right, sometimes we have, weall the ones Have to really lead
the deterrence, becausesometimes you celebrate the
professor, we don't celebratethe artisan, you see, and yes,
that's.
Grantley Martelly (21:20):
That's the thing that we also talked about
too Is, you know, we just hadthe first person in our family
get their PhD and she's notclinical psychologist, right,
but you know the fact that thematter is, if you look around us
, the Mechanic is just asimportant as a clinical
psychologist.
The plumber, yeah, right.
The person who sells yourgroceries, the person who cleans
(21:40):
your house.
I remember telling some peopleat work one day I used to I have
to have a talking to everybody,no matter where they are.
I say hi to the janitor, allthe way up to the CEO, and one
of my friends pulled me together, says Why do you call the start
to the janitor when you come in?
You know She's a human beingand she has grant keys for the
team.
And I said to him you know, ifshe don't do her work, every one
(22:02):
of us in here We're going home.
Are we going to the hospital?
right?
Yeah, so you cannot Devalue herjust because she's not a
manager or she doesn't have adegree.
She's a human being, yeah.
But the other thing that needsto be broken is this competition
, and I find a lot of thingsthat Sometimes in family we have
these expectations right.
Mommy is going to die that andI'm going to inherit this, i'm
(22:25):
going to inherit that andthey're gonna give me this and
they're gonna give me that.
So we looking forward togetting all this stuff physical
focus, physical focus and thenyou're gonna get in my way,
because now I got a split thatwith you, right?
But daddy always told me I wasgonna get the house.
You got five brothers, but youwalking around saying I'm gonna
get the house, yeah, what areyou other four brothers go
supposed to do?
right?
Martel Farley (22:46):
I'm gonna edit here because you have two
minutes to go.
Well, you know what I think?
I think you're gonna have tocontinue this in the next
program.
Okay, right, because it's somuch we need to unpack, i guess.
Give you one minute to give afinal comment in this segment.
Grantley Martelly (23:00):
Well, i mean, i'd say in order, the.
The issue of legacy is reallyimportant.
All of these things areimportant and the beauty of
being intentional about legacythat I have learned That our
family is learning is that itcreates a place to talk about it
.
You bring it on the table andpeople begin to talk about it
and some of those thingsliterally come out and say what
(23:21):
I always thought you were.
I always thought this, or Ialways thought, mommy, you know
Well, you got a college degreeand everybody thought you were
better than me.
The fact that we intentionaland we lay it out on the table
sometimes brings people forwardto begin to say it Right, some
of the things you were talkingabout says let's come to service
about this, because for 15years I've been feeling this.
(23:42):
Get a chance to share.
Martel Farley (23:45):
Well, i really think we're gonna continue this
in the next program, when Ithank you thank you for having
me here currently for sure of usAnd, as I said, we're gonna
have a for the next program aswell.
I want to thank you for sharingon this important topic.
Grantley Martelly (24:04):
Episode two of the family forum coming right
up after the break.
I want to tell you about myfriend, darren Porter and his
great team at performanceaudiocom.
Performance audiocom can beyour one-stop shop for
professional quality electronics, a live audio recording,
(24:26):
podcast in a live performance.
I've been doing business with ateam at performance audio for
over 20 years And they havealways specialized in the
highest quality equipment atreasonable prices and they ship
worldwide.
So not just settled for thecheapest thing on the internet.
You get what you pay for.
Go to performance audiocom andsee the wide variety of
professional quality electronicsrecording equipment and live
(24:50):
sound reinforcement.
They even carry lighting and DJand resources, all at
reasonable prices.
So say hi to Darren and checkout performance audiocom.
(25:20):
The second part of ourconversation.
We turn the topic towardslegacy and its impact on youth.
We talk about intergenerationalaspects of how both seniors and
youth can benefit frominteractions and from learning
from each other, and legacy isnot always the older people
passing on to the younger people, but sometimes the older people
(25:42):
are also simultaneouslylearning from the younger people
, as they are building a legacytogether.
Martel Farley (25:56):
We want to start this session, i'm sure, by
highlighting the youth, youthrole, and sometimes we think of
your legacy and we think more ofthe older persons in the family
.
That's critical as well, but wewant to start this discussion
as we zero in on the youth inour family.
We are there on the margin, orat the part and parcel of legacy
(26:22):
And therefore I'm going to handover to Robert Martelli and
then we'll come back and havesome dialogue.
Grantley Martelly (26:29):
Thank you.
It's good to be here again inthis show with you.
We're having a goodconversation.
Last time, if you remember, ifyou haven't seen the previous
episode, we talked about Timothyand Paul, based on Second
Timothy, and we talked aboutfive points, first point being
that Paul reminded Timothy thathe had a place to belong, he had
(26:51):
a place he could come to, hehad people who cared about him,
he had places, a person who heknew he could speak to, and many
of our young people today needto know that they have a place,
they can come, a place to belong.
The second thing we learnedthat Paul reminded him was that
you had a godly heritage.
You had a grandmother and amother who spoke into you and
(27:12):
helped you to becomefoundational in the things that
you are, that now you're aboutto propel into life.
That foundation is going tocarry you, as you have this
community to support you.
The third thing is that youhave a purpose in life, so their
job was helping them to faninto flame, and all that means
is to help pull out of him thethings that are in him and
(27:34):
remind him to be bold and to becourageous, because it's in you.
You just got to.
Let it come out and God willguide you and lead you and we
will stand behind you.
The fourth thing we talked aboutwas because there was a
reputation to protect.
So protect what you havelearned, protect what has been
entrusted to you and thenentrust it to other people.
Share what you have, pay itforward, teach other people the
(27:56):
things you know, just like yourgrandmother taught you, your
mother taught you and we havetaught you.
And then the fifth one is thatyou were uniquely created to be
you.
It may be Based on Psalm 139,verse 14 to 16.
So as we look at it now, goinginto the youth, you take that
point and you say each wascreated uniquely to be what you
God created you to be.
(28:17):
And there's certain things inlife that will not be
accomplished unless you do it.
It doesn't mean that God can'tdo it without you, but it means
that he want you to have theexperience, to know what he can
do through you, so uniquelycreated.
So if you look at that verse inwhere Paul was saying to Timothy
don't let anyone look down onyou because you're young, but
(28:38):
set an example in speech,conduct, love and purity Right.
A lot of times we say about setan example and we put a period
there, but you got to read thewhole verse Set an example in
speech, in conduct, in love, infaithfulness and purity.
And those are foundational tolegacy Right.
So how we speak, how we conductourselves, how we love people
(29:01):
or not, are we fearful in thethings that we say we're going
to do, not just in our marriagerelationships not all of our
marriage that he was talkingabout here, because Timothy was
still young but faithfulness inthe thing you said you're going
to do.
Can people trust your word?
Are you going to show up whenyou're supposed to show up?
Are you going to do the bestyou can do?
Not do it perfectly.
And then purity right.
Try to abstain from things thatare going to pull you down and
(29:26):
cause you to be unhealthy ornegative.
And God doesn't want us to bepure because he wants to steal
our joy.
God wants us to strive forpurity because he know it
benefits us.
And many of your older parentsand grandparents will tell you
about things they did in theiryouth that they wish they could
go back and undo, becausethey're living the consequences
(29:47):
to their right.
At that time they thought theirparents were holding them back,
but now they got to deal withwhatever it is you know.
So a few points I want us tolook at here.
The reality of today is thereality of today.
This is where we live.
It's okay to look back and sayyesterday, and it's okay to look
(30:07):
back We would like it like itwas before, but the fact is
those things help propel us, butwe can't go back to yesterday.
So what can we do today that isrelevant for today to propel us
forward?
We talk about the young people.
Do not look down upon thembecause they're young.
If we think about that verse,he was talking about people in
(30:29):
church as well as people incommunity.
I don't believe that sometimeswhen people look down on us is
because they're intentional indoing us harm.
They may just not understandwhere you're going, the things
that you're talking about, thedream that you have.
You look around us today andthere's so much technology And
some of the things that youngpeople are talking about you
(30:49):
know even we that are just onegeneration behind them don't
understand.
So you think about thegrandparents and other people.
It's like we don't have a cluewhat you're talking about.
Our children are exposed to somuch information to me.
I don't know if this isscientifically proven or not,
but it seems to me that ourchildren are exposed to there in
one day, more information thanmost of us were exposed to in
(31:13):
our entire life growing up.
Now, whether they use it or notis another thing, but they have
it in the internet, they haveit in Instagram, they have it in
all of these things.
Youtube you ever been onYouTube and just do a search for
a word and see how much videoscome up.
That's true.
You want to learn how to fix awindow.
You don't even have to go tolibrary anymore.
(31:34):
Just go on YouTube and you havea window to do it.
Some of our grandparents don'teven understand what YouTube is,
so I don't think they'relooking down on us in a negative
way, it's just I don'tunderstand what you're talking
about.
I don't understand how thiseven pertains to me.
So I want to engage withtechnology and be willing to
learn from young people aboutthings that are happening.
(31:58):
Partner with them in a way thatyou can learn, if you don't
know how to use your cell phone,as your grandchild, and they'll
be happy to teach you how touse it.
But don't put down the cellphone because we don't have
another phone like it used to be, and you guys are always on
your cell phone and all thatkind of stuff.
The second thing is try tocreate a judgment-free
environment, a place where youngpeople can come and have open
(32:19):
discussion, ask questions, learnsomething.
We were growing up.
There were a lot of things thatwere not our purport to even
talk about.
Today, our young people want totalk about them.
They want to talk abouteverything because they're
running into it.
In our day we had to go to thelibrary to find out certain
(32:40):
things In our day.
These young people just type itin and it's like oh, what does
that mean, mom?
Oh, okay, let me go and do someresearch And also don't be
afraid to say, hey, I don't know.
I need to go and learn aboutwhat you're talking about.
And then the other thing I wantto talk about is better
understand the community inwhich we live in.
(33:02):
It's different, it's different,it's not different, it's not
bad or good, it's just different.
Things happen differently,things think differently.
The kids are being taughtdifferently.
They're being in school, theywant to dress differently, they
want to listen to differentmusic.
But I believe that at the heartof it, young people still want
to be part of a family, stillwant to be part of a core group,
(33:23):
they still want to feel wanted,they want to have their
questions answered and they wantus to be authentic with them.
The other thing I would say isopen up your home as a place
where young people can hang out,because what happens in a home
I don't know if you noticed thisin a church is when you invite
people into your home, there isan additional level of
(33:44):
relaxation, an additional levelof sharing, an additional level
of community.
That happens.
That's why, in the Bible,whenever there was a covenant or
there was a treaty or somethingto be taken, the people
gathered in a circle in a homeor in a place.
They shared a meal, they washedhands together, washed feet
together, but it was alwayswithin that context of a
community of where it is.
(34:06):
They didn't go and sit down in aconference room and just sign
it and leave.
You had to have tea first, youhad to have dinner first, you
had to talk about everythingfirst, and they sort of created
that place where people can askquestions.
The Bible talks about in Psalm1-3, being planted by a river of
water that brings forth fruitin the season, and the only way
(34:27):
we can bring forth fruit is ifwe are planted.
We understand the soil we arein, we understand the nurture of
the soil how are we going togrow and that there is a season
for that fruit, and it may notbe the season that we think it
is, but the season may be thatGod wants it to be.
So one of the things we talkedabout earlier we were getting
into is the community and thisattention in a family that could
(34:51):
arise because people are on thesame page, and I think that we
see this here in Timothy thatPaul was saying everybody is not
always on the same page,timothy.
So part of your job, this youngman coming into this place
where some of the people are oldenough to be your grandmother
or your mother they probablyknew them.
(35:11):
Your job is to help get them onthe same page, at least to the
point that they can move thatchurch, that community forward
in understanding.
It doesn't mean that everybodyhas to agree, but you create a
level of understanding that wecan move forward together, talk
together, even have argumentstogether.
(35:32):
That's not always bad.
Sometimes you need to have anargument because somebody has
something to say.
Let them say what they have tosay and then go from there.
Because if we tell them theycan't say, you don't know what
happens Resentment, pain, theanger.
They come into the room nowthey leave it a separate anger.
You wouldn't talk to me, youwouldn't let me say whatever.
And the opportunity we had tosolve a problem now becomes
(35:55):
worse Because the next time theycome they come with more anger.
Anderson Kellman (35:59):
And they will say anyway.
Grantley Martelly (36:02):
If they don't say to you, they're going to
say to somebody.
That's what Paul was tellingTimberty create that place,
because they had dissension,they had disunity, they had
false doctrine, he's saying.
create a space for them tobecome and dialogue.
Martel Farley (36:19):
I believe you were listening intently as you
were, and the information sharedis so relevant when it comes to
legacy in the family And yousee, the importance of the youth
blending with the older one.
that's what it word.
that's what I hope you learn.
you know, it is not a casewhere we are supposed to be
(36:42):
segregated or segmented.
part and parcel of the familyAnd this is replicated in the
church.
The concepts here that we talkabout, that should be in the
home, replicated in the churchas well, because you have church
family, you have the bloodfamily, church family.
Some of the commonalities arevery, very real.
Anderson Kellman (37:01):
Well, welcome back to you, And we're having
quite an interesting discussionand I listened very well to my
family and I was thinking aboutthe generation gap, you know,
and basically what he has said.
It will see me as though thatis a wrong making If those kind
(37:24):
of risks are there, where weallow for open dialogue, where
we have a size that's about allthe folk we may not be fully
aware of all the things that wedo now.
He mentioned internet.
Has been one of those elements.
You know, the cell phone thatis so removed from the rotary
phone of many years ago.
(37:47):
Right, there has to be a senseof understanding that we don't
all speak the same language, youknow, and to create the
opportunity, the environmentwhere persons can feel and share
their thoughts, share theirconcerns and also learn from
(38:08):
each other as well, so that wecan maintain useful dialogue.
And in that case then that issueof generation gap will
obviously become, obviouslyshrink in a sense.
And of course, that also haslots of other components
attached to the early, thebelief systems.
Right, you know and we began totalk a little bit earlier the
(38:32):
whole issue of our parentstelling us things like, you know
, stay from our culture.
You know I want the whole, notthe fort for you, you know,
obviously has no back door, andso it became a river from the
sea.
Now it is the tremendouseconomic power that I would say
(38:52):
on the water.
So I think that we need toreally begin to look at how we
can engage, change that kind ofthinking That sort of thing,
because legacy can be shaped.
Grantley Martelly (39:04):
Yes, yes, yes , legacy can definitely be
shaped.
Martel Farley (39:07):
Yes, Well, so take on that I'm finding.
Yeah, i mean so think go ahead,yeah, the whole idea of
occupation.
we focused on the historicalcontext.
Grantley Martelly (39:21):
Yeah, so the whole idea of occupation.
So when I was growing up, youknow I had and I can't
necessarily attribute this to mymother, whoever I'm a product
society, but my idea was you hadto be a doctor, a lawyer or a
politician, because those arethe only three people I saw who
seemed to have money, who seemedto have anything else?
right, that was my context.
(39:41):
My mother was very out of thecountry.
Martel Farley (39:44):
No, i'd teach her a policeman Well.
Grantley Martelly (39:46):
I could have been a teacher because I was
actually recruited to be ateacher before I left Barbados
It's not glamorous And I wasrecruited to be in the Defense
Force actually, and if you thinkabout it, at that time there
was a lot of opportunity in theDefense Force, right, but they
were still building the DefenseForce when we got out of high
school, right, but I neverthought about agriculture and
that kind of stuff, you know.
(40:07):
But if you think about it, whenour grandparents and parents
said, you know, i don't want tosee a horn in your hand and that
kind of stuff, they werethinking about it from the
context of slavery and poorslavery and being on
sharecroppers and working theland and physically there.
I don't think they werethinking of it in terms, first,
you could actually own the land.
(40:28):
There you go.
I just worked the land.
There you go, but you could ownthe land.
That's the first thing.
Second thing how do you do itdifferently?
I don't think they evenperceived the fact that today
there are farmers out there whoown land and who have computers
that decide when to turn on thewater and when to shut off the
water, when to harvest and whennot to harvest, right?
(40:49):
I've seen things where growersnow have these heat maps and,
instead of just watering thewhole field, it only shows them
where the water is below acertain amount, and that's what
comes on When they come toharvest it.
The field is mapped out rightAnd the harvesters out there and
it's empty and the farmers gotan iPad watching the tractor go
(41:10):
and harvest.
You know tons.
In one day.
They can do more work than allof those plantation workers did
in a week.
That's a completely differentview of agriculture than our
grandparents had, and our greatgrandparents had right.
So they were telling us withinthe context of what they
understood, and that's why todayit's so important, as we build
generational and thismulti-generational is to
(41:32):
understand that sometimes, whenthe young people are talking
about something, they're talkingabout it in a vision that is
sometimes beyond.
So give them a hearing What youcan have.
Give them a hearing.
Trust them.
You know, when they say I wantto start my own business.
For us and for our grandparentsand stuff, starting your own
business was just this reallytough thing.
(41:53):
But now I tell young people allthe time you can be anything
you want to be.
And here's the thing in this21st century, if it doesn't
exist, you can create it.
It's true.
Did you ever get taught thatyou can create your own world.
Anderson Kellman (42:11):
No, that was not part of our system.
We were in some ways we were inthe community to believe that
we have to basically work withwhat is there?
Right, You know, we leaveschool and you find a job.
That is there, Yes, You know.
So the whole idea now of beingan entrepreneur, you know we're
(42:34):
not entirely new because we knowthat there were other.
Grantley Martelly (42:37):
There were entrepreneurs you know Sal and
the Marrake harvesting therewere entrepreneurs Who pay the
way.
Martel Farley (42:42):
We didn't call them that.
Yeah right, the Hawker, yeah,the Hawker.
That seemed to have been astage.
The big farmer, yeah.
Anderson Kellman (42:49):
That seemed to be a big happy-ness stage that
was there to fuel those whowanted to become doctors and
lawyers, and stuff right Becausethe Hawker and the big farmer
had a perception because theirchildren became a doctor.
Martel Farley (43:05):
Right.
Anderson Kellman (43:06):
The reason for those black businesses, it's
true, i mean the thought wasthat our children should become
professionals, professional.
And once they becameprofessionals.
They left to find a business.
Yeah right.
Martel Farley (43:16):
And that is kind of difficult, because to me we
have any bad business.
There are some bad businesses,but once the owner has done the
business, they do business aswell.
Grantley Martelly (43:27):
Yeah, see, because they didn't build that
legacy.
Martel Farley (43:30):
This is important , right, see, you put your big
kid in the legacy.
Grantley Martelly (43:32):
But then when you look at other communities.
Martel Farley (43:35):
The other community is not the same thing.
Grantley Martelly (43:38):
They teach those children to carry on, to
carry on, to carry on.
They teach them to beentrepreneur, they teach them to
be farmer.
They teach them to own the landYou talk about by the sea.
We didn't think about going bythe sea and there's too much
salt and the thing your housewrought out and all that kind of
stuff.
And now you look at theproperties close to the coast
(43:58):
Very expensive, very expensive,right, odo Barit, yeah, and
those people are asking abouthow much is it gonna cost to
replace my roof every 10 years?
because it's gonna wrought out,right, because they've been
taught you can make enough thatwhen it comes to replace your
roof you just do it.
So that's not an obstacle.
The obstacle is the opportunity.
The obstacle is the opportunity.
(44:20):
Sure, the sea ain't got no backdoor, but most tourists who
come in here not even going farenough that the back door even
matters, The back door evenmatters, but you know what I'm
talking about.
Anderson Kellman (44:32):
I think, though, that this whole idea of
legacy, though, has suchsignificant implications I mean
not just in terms of interest tocome, but I think even now
we've all been able to talkabout and address these issues
are critical And shaping what isto come, because I think that
(44:57):
there's some things that havecome down to us that are no
longer relevant, i mean backwhen they were said to us all,
when they were in ourconstructable minds.
It made sense because that'swhere they were, and so I think
what has happened is that wehave accepted things a lot stuck
in barrel, without this kind ofanalysis, and I think that
(45:19):
we've heard of our own journeyis to come to these points of
analysis and see what makessense, what does it, and
hopefully, we make somecorrections.
And, for example, what yourbusiness?
I think the point that ReverendMacha made.
(45:39):
It's so poignant that businesscan be just as a generational
thing.
If we want generation, as wesay, across the generations in,
how can we build on our fathersbe, how can we build on our
mothers' business?
how can we, you know, how canwe not, you know, come along and
build on?
our father left, our fatherleft, you know.
(46:00):
So it becomes more of a broaderscope.
Yeah, i just think it's anunnarrow, unnarrow perspective.
Martel Farley (46:08):
Well, the time has disappeared already.
It's have two minutes to go,but it's a discussion.
You know, viewers, we obviously, our sessions are discussion
starters.
So perhaps you can start adiscussion in your church, in
your family, the whole idea oflegacy, and that's what we
sought to do here.
Get new thinking so thatperhaps you can have yourself
(46:29):
turn into a sit-down as familyand bring your different members
together and tell us some jokesand have some food, and I mean
even that food in turn, the oneyou use, not what you used to
use then.
So it's really, reallyimportant, and it has personal
component to it as well.
All right, reverend Martelly,just find out where's the minute
(46:50):
also, and then you'll have ourclosing pre.
Grantley Martelly (46:53):
So I give you one quick example and then one
verse.
My mother-in-law for a longtime had a flip phone.
She didn't want to upgrade.
But then she started havinggreat-grandchildren And she
wanted to see them.
She saw her sister had an iPad,talking to her grandchildren
because her daughter worked forDisney.
She was like what is this?
(47:13):
Three months later mymother-in-law was using the iPad
because her motivation was Iwant to see my grandchildren
great-grandchildren.
No more flip phone, right.
So she learned, she madetwo-generational leaps because
she wanted to see that She'sindeed indeed.
And Psalm 13 says bless is theman who's planted by the water,
(47:36):
rivers of water that bring forthfruit in its season.
I want to encourage you tothink about that differently To
be planted by rivers of water,understand the water, understand
the value of water, understandthe value of land, what seed
needs to be planted, when, sothat you can bring forth fruit
in its season.
And sometimes, when we plant,we also got to realize we don't
know everything.
A good farmer will tell youthey're always learning.
That's right, right.
(47:57):
So how can we teach thatagricultural mentality, that
farming mentality, whether youchoose to be a farmer, choose to
be a preacher, a teacher, abusinessman, understand that you
got to be planted by water andyou got to understand land and
culture and soil and sun andmoon new moon, half moon, full
moon so you can bring forthfruit in the season.
Martel Farley (48:16):
Yes, Beautiful thought to end the whole
discussion with legacy AndReverend.
I tell you thanks so much.
Grantley Martelly (48:24):
Thank you for having me.
We enjoyed the discussiontremendously.
Martel Farley (48:27):
May God bless you and your ministry.
Grantley Martelly (48:30):
So if we are to leave a rich family legacy,
it has to be built, it has to besome intentionality involved.
It has to include interactions,understanding, modeling,
creating safe places and, mostof all, enjoying life together.
The material things that weaccumulate are simply a bonus of
(48:52):
our legacy.
Your legacy is substantially inyour hands.
Remember to subscribe and leaveus a rating.
Ratings are very important tohelping our podcast succeed in
the podcast universe and helpingit become known to other people
.
Email us your comments atabovethenoise24 at gmailcom, And
(49:16):
follow us on Instagram andFacebook at abovethenoise24.
Thank you for listening.
Please share this episode withyour friends.
Welcome to Above the Noise, a podcast at
the intersection of faith, raceand reconciliation, and I'm your
host, Grantley Martelly.
This episode of Above the Noisecenters around the topic of
(00:32):
building a family legacy.
It is an audio file of arecording from a television
broadcast that was broadcast onthe Caribbean Broadcasting
Corporation television inBarbados in November of 2022,
when I was invited to be a gueston the program called Family
Forum, hosted by the Church ofNazarene.
(00:52):
The host of the program areReverend Martell Farley and
Reverend Anderson Kelman.
We're each building a legacy,whether we're doing it
intentionally or simply byliving our lives.
They're parts of our legacythat we have control over, and
the other parts of our legacythat come about because of just
where we live, who we are, thethings that we're doing.
(01:14):
Join us as we explore thebiblical, social and cultural
aspects of leaving a rich legacy, and I hope that you enjoy the
program as much as I enjoyedhaving a conversation with
Reverend Farley and withReverend Kelman.
Good to be here, good to beback in Barbados, good to be
(01:35):
back home, like we say, on therock and seeing friends and
family.
I'm actually here for thisvisit.
We had our family reunion, theseventh family reunion that
we've had.
We have one every three yearssomewhere in the world And this
one we decided to come back toBarbados, where it started in
(01:57):
2001.
We get together to honor andremember those who have gone
before, specifically our mothers, and some of you may know her
Sister, madeline Leon, who was amember of Hallsville Church of
the Nazarene for over 50 years.
So today we're going to talkabout legacy.
So we honored her legacy And weencourage our young people and
(02:20):
our brothers and sisters toremember that we have a legacy,
and I want to talk to you todayabout that.
There's a number of differentplaces that the Bible talks
about legacy, includingDeuteronomy, where Farley read
from.
But I want to talk to you from1 Timothy, chapter one, where
Paul is talking to Timothy aboutlegacy.
(02:40):
We don't always read it thatway because sometimes the
ministers you know they teach ustheology.
Timothy was a pastor.
Paul was teaching him how to bea pastor, but if you look at it
, he's also talking about hislegacy, right?
Because of these five pointsthat I notice here, the first
one is that he has a place tobelong.
We all need a place to belong.
(03:01):
So Paul is telling him youbelong here in 1 Timothy and 2
Timothy.
He called him a son.
You're my son, you're a fellowworker, you're a companion,
which means you have a place tobelong And legacy is always tied
to a place and to people, whereyou're from.
What are you trying to remember?
How were you brought up?
(03:21):
The things that you werebrought up to be, but also your
present there.
How do you connect?
You connect in the family.
Paul called him his son.
You know that Paul used Timothyin many ways as a son And a
fellow worker.
He even called him by one timea bond servant.
Right, bond servant means nowyou no longer carry in letters
(03:41):
back and forth, but you're nowon the road and you're getting
the beatings and you're gettingthe criticism like everybody
else, but even in all of thatyou belong here.
If you ever need a place to be,you know you have me and you
have the other brothers andsisters in the fellowship.
The second thing that we seeabout Timothy that Paul says is
(04:02):
you have a heritage, a godlyheritage.
He refers him back to hismother and his grandmother.
He says remember yourgrandmother, your grandmother
Lois and your mother Eunice.
And he said remember theirstrong faith.
So that means they were active,they were strong, they taught
him well, they imparted to him.
(04:24):
Their faith was active.
And now he says you have thatheritage and he'll go on to say
in the next point that I see itin you, right.
So he reminded him that, firstof all, you have a place to
belong.
Secondly, you have a place tolook forward to.
You have that heritage to lookback to, that grandmother, that
mother who taught you.
(04:44):
We know that in the Jewishtradition, the father was
supposed to teach the childrenthe Torah, but we also know that
the mother spent more time withthe children.
So the father may come in andteach the Torah in the afternoon
at the dinner table, but duringthe day the mother and the
grandmother is actually teachingthe children how to put that
(05:06):
into practice, right?
So he learned a lot from hismother and grandmother, as well
as from his dad.
The third point we see is thatyou have a purpose in life.
You set the fan into flame,that which was placed in you,
right?
You have a purpose.
We see it in you now.
We encourage you to do it Now.
How did Paul and the team helphim to do that?
(05:26):
First of all, we know thatTimothy was used to run messages
back and forth between thedifferent churches.
He probably carried Paul's bag,or he probably, you know he was
along.
You know, if every were littlekids and we wanted to follow the
big people along, they'll giveyou like a purse or a bag or
said bring this.
You know, you want to helparound the house.
And even though the Bibledoesn't say all these in detail,
(05:48):
we know in history, if you goback and look at the history of
that time, that the Bible doestalk about this, that the older
people are supposed to mentorthe younger people and bring
them along.
Right, and it was an oralsociety, so things were
communicated orally and by doing, you know, jesus learned to be
a carpenter, a builder, acontractor from his father.
(06:10):
Right, father, probably thefirst one to put a hammer in his
hand.
And that's probably whathappened to Timothy when he's
saying fan into flame that whichhas been called, but laying on
of hands.
The laying on of hands didn'tput the gift in Timothy, the
laying on of hands just helpedto pull it out further, right?
So now the you know, they saythere's smoke, there's fire.
(06:31):
So they're saying we want, youknow, it's time for you to stop
just smoking or those things.
We want to see some fire comingout of you.
Because the fourth point isbecause you have a purpose in
life and you have a reputationto protect.
God has called you to dosomething.
He's put you in a place We'regoing to help you get there.
But now you're old enough thatyou need to start acting on that
(06:54):
.
You need to start maturing that.
You need to start getting outthere and doing what you're
supposed to do so that we canhelp guide you and continue to
bless you and to support you.
Right, protect what you havelearned.
And he said entrust it totrustworthy people.
And that is a good part of alegacy there.
His grandmother entrusted it tohis mother, who entrusted it to
him.
And now Paul is saying entrustit to Godly man who can help you
(07:17):
do the work.
So you see, this legacy isbuilding.
And then the fifth thing is thatwe are all created uniquely.
Psalm 139, verse 14 and 17,.
It's according to 16 says weare fearfully and wonderfully
made.
So God has created each personfor a unique purpose And there
is some things in life thatnobody else can accomplish
(07:39):
besides you.
So we have some overlappingthings.
You may be in ministry together, we may know people together,
but there's certain things thatonly I can do, only certain
things that you can do, onlycertain things, because that
sphere of influence is you,right.
So God uniquely made us to dothat and to be there.
And Paul was reminding himTimothy, you are the one we are
(07:59):
placing here, right.
And if you go on further, yousee Timothy is in this church
and he's saying you need to dealwith the false teachings, you
need not to be intimidated.
In verse 14, it tells him bebold in what you do, don't let
people put you down, becausethat flame in you is put there
by God And even though you maybe the youngest in many rooms,
that doesn't mean that you'renot called to do it.
(08:22):
So the final thing about legacyis, whether we realize it or not
, whether we accept it or not,or whether we're intentional
about it or not, we're eachbuilding a legacy every day, a
legacy of the summation of allthe parts of our life the good,
the bad and the ugly that isleft behind that people remember
us for.
And the thing that peopleremember us for they'll remember
(08:44):
if you leave some money,they'll remember if you leave a
house or a car.
All those things are going tofade away.
But long after those thingshave faded away, they're going
to remember who we were, theperson we were, how we treated
people, how we love people,whether we were kind or whether
we were gentle, whether you werea person that people could come
to for help, or whether theyknow that you're going to be the
(09:04):
person that's spreading all thethings to everybody.
You hear this and you hear thatright, and one of the things
that I would like for my life iswhen I am dead.
I've heard some people pass tome and I heard some people say
good riddance, and that commentis a comment of legacy.
That means that that person hadsuch a legacy that people were
(09:28):
glad that they were no longerthere, and I don't want my life
to be that.
I want, when I die, that peopleremember, not necessarily miss
me and put up walls and plaquesto me, but that my life mattered
in somebody else's life to helpthem to become a better person.
Anderson Kellman (09:45):
Mm-hmm Well that's, that's, that's powerful.
Yes, what I'm teaching there,but practical teaching, though,
because one of the things I wassaying is that, whether or not
you realize it, you know legacy,yeah Right, and that's for good
or for bad, mm-hmm.
Grantley Martelly (10:04):
Right.
Anderson Kellman (10:04):
They want what was said, though by a bit more
telling, in terms of the wholeissue of a trusting legacy to
faithful men, Mm-hmm.
You want to talk about it alittle more though, because I am
thinking that you know itsounds intentional.
(10:26):
It sounds as though, as anindividual, we have to be almost
creative about legacy Mm-hmmAnd ensure that There's not a
left to chance.
There's a left to chance.
Grantley Martelly (10:39):
Right, yeah, yeah.
So that's a really interestingpoint.
Right, because part of this isthere's certain things about our
legacy and our life that wecontrol.
That's right.
And there's certain things thatwe don't control.
That's good.
And many times we spend a lotof time on the things we don't
control, trying to change,unfortunately, unfortunately.
But if you, what?
if we focus intentionally onthe things that we do control,
(11:00):
yeah, how you control again, howyou treat people, how we appear
, how we respond, do we respondor do we react?
You know, and the other thingabout legacy is that we are not
perfect, so legacy doesn't meanthat everything about you is
perfect.
We're going to have our goodtimes on a bad time, good days
and bad days, and coming torealize that, as believers, as
men and women, that sometimesour bad days, how we respond to
(11:24):
those, say more about us thanhow we do our good days.
So the intentionality then youknow to pass it on is what can I
control?
What are the things that I cando?
Can I impart something tosomebody else?
Can I help somebody elsesucceed better than me?
That's one of the things wetalk about at our final reunion.
You know, sometimes it's notalways about me.
Sometimes I am put in the placeto help you.
(11:47):
Not just come alongside me, buthelp propel you ahead of me.
Martel Farley (11:54):
Because really it's almost like a network, yeah
, like the whole team has afunction.
Anderson Kellman (12:01):
Now.
Martel Farley (12:01):
You said just now each person is unique, so if
each person get to understandtheir role and their function,
then it makes a legacy richer.
Grantley Martelly (12:11):
Makes a legacy richer.
that's right, We're going tocome back and eliminate it.
Martel Farley (12:15):
It's a topic that we find very interesting, as
you have shown us quickly.
Right in the world, we have theinformation of legacy.
Anderson Kellman (12:24):
One of the things that really impacted on
me is the whole personal growth,and personal growth is not just
for the individual alone, it'sfor the individual group The
people around us.
Yes, Because we are a part ofthe system And we are part of
(12:44):
that system And therefore, whenwe grow and change and become
the best version of ourselves,then we are part of the system
in a more positive way And soour personal growth has
significant impact on thosewellness and the stability.
Grantley Martelly (13:12):
It does.
When we grow and we becomebetter.
We surround ourselves withpeople who help us become better
.
Part of our personal growth isrealizing that there have been
other people who poured into ourlives to make us who we are, to
make us better.
So he's saying to now pay thatforward and trust it to
trustworthy people And thattrustworthy I mean we can do a
(13:35):
whole section on that Because tofind a trustworthy person
you've got to begin to knowtheir character.
You've got to begin to know whothey are.
That's why Parker wrote allthese things about Timothy.
They spent so much timetogether that he was talking
about character.
He was a person of integrity.
So how do you help?
How do you find those peopleand then entrust it into them?
What I've learned in my life isthat sometimes you find those
(13:58):
people because they findthemselves, They come and
they're attached to you, Theyshow you the self.
Sometimes some of the people wethink are going to be the
greatest at something or not,And the one we think are going
to be the least or the one whoreally catch on to it, And
that's the one we end up pouringourselves into right.
But the other thing I wasfocusing on before the break.
Was that coming to the point inlife where we are comfortable
(14:22):
and at peace to watchingsomebody we help go farther than
we were?
Whoa, Yeah Right.
Martel Farley (14:30):
This means that we have to have perception And
it cannot be a competition Right, and the whole idea of wanting
the person to be propelled forthat you are means that you
can't have that sense ofcompetition Right.
I'm not actually talking abouthealthy competition.
Healthy competition I supposethere's room for that as well,
(14:51):
right?
Grantley Martelly (14:52):
But the whole idea of jealousy, yeah, which
is what Timothy Paul was talkingabout.
Timothy, right, he's trying topropel him ahead of him.
Martel Farley (14:58):
Yes, but I'm talking about jealousy.
Grantley Martelly (15:00):
Yeah, yeah, jealousy is the negative part.
Martel Farley (15:02):
It can undermine the legacy.
If you want to say that.
Anderson Kellman (15:05):
Yeah, but I also see we have to have a real
perspective as well.
Yeah, We're going where youwant to get, because in our
Western construct we're veryindividualistic, right, right,
and so we think about ourselves,or beginning or end what we
accomplish.
But I think what we're sharingthis afternoon is we'll see
(15:30):
things more in terms of a morefamily, a more opposite kind of
family, a family context Yeah,not just me.
Right, the we, every generation.
We should get better, we shouldbecome stronger.
Yeah, we should be moreinfluential.
We should connect better peoplegenerally.
(15:51):
So it's a more, it's a muchbroader perspective, a broader
perspective.
Grantley Martelly (15:55):
Yeah, now we need to become comfortable with
it, right?
Especially as believers, weshould become comfortable with
seeing other people propel inour faith, propel in their faith
stronger and maybe even learnfrom them, maybe that person
that you led to Christ, maybe aperson who can help you through
a struggle, because God is giftto them with something that we
(16:16):
don't have.
But that's not easy, right,it's not easy to see people move
ahead of us.
It's not always easy, becausewe need to be taught to work
hard And we will always be ahead, especially if you're older.
But think about the beauty ofwe were talking before this.
You've seen your children gofarther than you even went.
(16:38):
I find joy in that to see mychildren doing things that I
only imagined, and some of themthat I couldn't even imagine.
Right, and see them doing thatAnd I'm like, wow, they're so
far ahead of me.
Martel Farley (16:53):
Yeah, it means also that one of the things that
we have to do more of is to becelebrate.
Celebrate, yeah, celebrate whathappens in a family, it doesn't
matter who it's from, all theway it may be.
A child comes from a university, you celebrate it.
You get a new job, youcelebrate And, of course, so
(17:15):
that becomes a culture ofcelebration.
If something happens, youadvertise And, because it's not
only the good things that youzero in on, the things that are
made may happen that arenegative.
Right, you want to even placeand see well, how can it help to
make things better?
Grantley Martelly (17:32):
You walk beside what we say, those lower
times, right, knowing thatwithin them, like Paul said,
there's a flim, there's a,there's a spark in there That's
going to burst into a flim Andmaybe this trial is the flame,
is this Catalyst that's going tocause that thing to burst into
a flame and that person's goingto come out of that much
stronger than they went in.
But we also be walked with them.
(17:53):
We don't just send them on Yeah, got your back and leave them.
We walk with them through it.
So if they need a hand for alittle bit of time, we put them
along, yeah.
But then you get to the pointwhere you fling of my head.
I say, alright, you just comethrough that, keep going, buddy.
Martel Farley (18:05):
It makes a journey more practical, real,
you know.
Anderson Kellman (18:11):
I want to, to be an advocate, not a devs
advocate, it's an advocate.
And I will ask the question,though Is there, is there
Something that has to be broken?
You know, in our, in ourgenerations, to first think that
(18:34):
they're thinking?
It's what I mean with that.
I find that that often timesthat they, they seem like in
fighting in families, i see ageneration as well.
It seems as though, you know,persons don't talk to each other
.
The ambience of one another,and it's a general sense of poor
(18:59):
, don't tear down.
And as one thing, though, ifmaybe It's a spirit dimension in
this whole idea of legacy thathas to be corrected, broken So
that we as So, yes, families can.
(19:19):
Yeah, i'm getting the processthat you talked about, because I
am seeing, i'm seeing awonderful benefits I'm seeing,
i'm seeing things like, like,families give us gosh the
families, you know.
I'm seeing families educatingfamilies, you know.
But it's not just about me.
You know, i met one family Imean, i'm a customer that I see
well, you know, and she's achance to become a new surgeon,
(19:44):
you know, and as a family, as a,you know, our parents can do
that, but collectively could behelp.
Martel Farley (19:55):
So what about?
what about?
I mean without seeing contextWhat about families sharing
finances?
Grantley Martelly (20:01):
Yeah, yeah, that's part of the.
I think one needs to be brokenI mean, if you want to talk
spiritually, deeply, spiritualtheological right that spirit of
Selfishness, right aboutpossible selfishness, and needs
to be broken by the Holy Spiritto realize that There is enough
in the world to go around forall of us.
(20:23):
The fact that you succeed, orthat your, your cousin, becoming
your surgeon, doesn't mean thatyou're less, yeah, doesn't mean
that what you're doing doesn'tmatter as much.
Right, so can you?
can you let go of that and notbe so competitive, realizing
that When one person in ourfamily succeed, the whole family
succeed?
Martel Farley (20:43):
It also means we have to value The different gift
in different gift in here, herein the, in our context, there
are Caribbean culture.
We put a lot of emphasis on theacademics.
Yeah, that's right I might havesomebody in a family who's a
wonderful artisan.
Should he see himself asimportant as My other brother
(21:08):
who was a professor?
right, sometimes we have, weall the ones Have to really lead
the deterrence, becausesometimes you celebrate the
professor, we don't celebratethe artisan, you see, and yes,
that's.
Grantley Martelly (21:20):
That's the thing that we also talked about
too Is, you know, we just hadthe first person in our family
get their PhD and she's notclinical psychologist, right,
but you know the fact that thematter is, if you look around us
, the Mechanic is just asimportant as a clinical
psychologist.
The plumber, yeah, right.
The person who sells yourgroceries, the person who cleans
(21:40):
your house.
I remember telling some peopleat work one day I used to I have
to have a talking to everybody,no matter where they are.
I say hi to the janitor, allthe way up to the CEO, and one
of my friends pulled me together, says Why do you call the start
to the janitor when you come in?
You know She's a human beingand she has grant keys for the
team.
And I said to him you know, ifshe don't do her work, every one
(22:02):
of us in here We're going home.
Are we going to the hospital?
right?
Yeah, so you cannot Devalue herjust because she's not a
manager or she doesn't have adegree.
She's a human being, yeah.
But the other thing that needsto be broken is this competition
, and I find a lot of thingsthat Sometimes in family we have
these expectations right.
Mommy is going to die that andI'm going to inherit this, i'm
(22:25):
going to inherit that andthey're gonna give me this and
they're gonna give me that.
So we looking forward togetting all this stuff physical
focus, physical focus and thenyou're gonna get in my way,
because now I got a split thatwith you, right?
But daddy always told me I wasgonna get the house.
You got five brothers, but youwalking around saying I'm gonna
get the house, yeah, what areyou other four brothers go
supposed to do?
right?
Martel Farley (22:46):
I'm gonna edit here because you have two
minutes to go.
Well, you know what I think?
I think you're gonna have tocontinue this in the next
program.
Okay, right, because it's somuch we need to unpack, i guess.
Give you one minute to give afinal comment in this segment.
Grantley Martelly (23:00):
Well, i mean, i'd say in order, the.
The issue of legacy is reallyimportant.
All of these things areimportant and the beauty of
being intentional about legacythat I have learned That our
family is learning is that itcreates a place to talk about it
.
You bring it on the table andpeople begin to talk about it
and some of those thingsliterally come out and say what
(23:21):
I always thought you were.
I always thought this, or Ialways thought, mommy, you know
Well, you got a college degreeand everybody thought you were
better than me.
The fact that we intentionaland we lay it out on the table
sometimes brings people forwardto begin to say it Right, some
of the things you were talkingabout says let's come to service
about this, because for 15years I've been feeling this.
(23:42):
Get a chance to share.
Martel Farley (23:45):
Well, i really think we're gonna continue this
in the next program, when Ithank you thank you for having
me here currently for sure of usAnd, as I said, we're gonna
have a for the next program aswell.
I want to thank you for sharingon this important topic.
Grantley Martelly (24:04):
Episode two of the family forum coming right
up after the break.
I want to tell you about myfriend, darren Porter and his
great team at performanceaudiocom.
Performance audiocom can beyour one-stop shop for
professional quality electronics, a live audio recording,
(24:26):
podcast in a live performance.
I've been doing business with ateam at performance audio for
over 20 years And they havealways specialized in the
highest quality equipment atreasonable prices and they ship
worldwide.
So not just settled for thecheapest thing on the internet.
You get what you pay for.
Go to performance audiocom andsee the wide variety of
professional quality electronicsrecording equipment and live
(24:50):
sound reinforcement.
They even carry lighting and DJand resources, all at
reasonable prices.
So say hi to Darren and checkout performance audiocom.
(25:20):
The second part of ourconversation.
We turn the topic towardslegacy and its impact on youth.
We talk about intergenerationalaspects of how both seniors and
youth can benefit frominteractions and from learning
from each other, and legacy isnot always the older people
passing on to the younger people, but sometimes the older people
(25:42):
are also simultaneouslylearning from the younger people
, as they are building a legacytogether.
Martel Farley (25:56):
We want to start this session, i'm sure, by
highlighting the youth, youthrole, and sometimes we think of
your legacy and we think more ofthe older persons in the family
.
That's critical as well, but wewant to start this discussion
as we zero in on the youth inour family.
We are there on the margin, orat the part and parcel of legacy
(26:22):
And therefore I'm going to handover to Robert Martelli and
then we'll come back and havesome dialogue.
Grantley Martelly (26:29):
Thank you.
It's good to be here again inthis show with you.
We're having a goodconversation.
Last time, if you remember, ifyou haven't seen the previous
episode, we talked about Timothyand Paul, based on Second
Timothy, and we talked aboutfive points, first point being
that Paul reminded Timothy thathe had a place to belong, he had
(26:51):
a place he could come to, hehad people who cared about him,
he had places, a person who heknew he could speak to, and many
of our young people today needto know that they have a place,
they can come, a place to belong.
The second thing we learnedthat Paul reminded him was that
you had a godly heritage.
You had a grandmother and amother who spoke into you and
(27:12):
helped you to becomefoundational in the things that
you are, that now you're aboutto propel into life.
That foundation is going tocarry you, as you have this
community to support you.
The third thing is that youhave a purpose in life, so their
job was helping them to faninto flame, and all that means
is to help pull out of him thethings that are in him and
(27:34):
remind him to be bold and to becourageous, because it's in you.
You just got to.
Let it come out and God willguide you and lead you and we
will stand behind you.
The fourth thing we talked aboutwas because there was a
reputation to protect.
So protect what you havelearned, protect what has been
entrusted to you and thenentrust it to other people.
Share what you have, pay itforward, teach other people the
(27:56):
things you know, just like yourgrandmother taught you, your
mother taught you and we havetaught you.
And then the fifth one is thatyou were uniquely created to be
you.
It may be Based on Psalm 139,verse 14 to 16.
So as we look at it now, goinginto the youth, you take that
point and you say each wascreated uniquely to be what you
God created you to be.
(28:17):
And there's certain things inlife that will not be
accomplished unless you do it.
It doesn't mean that God can'tdo it without you, but it means
that he want you to have theexperience, to know what he can
do through you, so uniquelycreated.
So if you look at that verse inwhere Paul was saying to Timothy
don't let anyone look down onyou because you're young, but
(28:38):
set an example in speech,conduct, love and purity Right.
A lot of times we say about setan example and we put a period
there, but you got to read thewhole verse Set an example in
speech, in conduct, in love, infaithfulness and purity.
And those are foundational tolegacy Right.
So how we speak, how we conductourselves, how we love people
(29:01):
or not, are we fearful in thethings that we say we're going
to do, not just in our marriagerelationships not all of our
marriage that he was talkingabout here, because Timothy was
still young but faithfulness inthe thing you said you're going
to do.
Can people trust your word?
Are you going to show up whenyou're supposed to show up?
Are you going to do the bestyou can do?
Not do it perfectly.
And then purity right.
Try to abstain from things thatare going to pull you down and
(29:26):
cause you to be unhealthy ornegative.
And God doesn't want us to bepure because he wants to steal
our joy.
God wants us to strive forpurity because he know it
benefits us.
And many of your older parentsand grandparents will tell you
about things they did in theiryouth that they wish they could
go back and undo, becausethey're living the consequences
(29:47):
to their right.
At that time they thought theirparents were holding them back,
but now they got to deal withwhatever it is you know.
So a few points I want us tolook at here.
The reality of today is thereality of today.
This is where we live.
It's okay to look back and sayyesterday, and it's okay to look
(30:07):
back We would like it like itwas before, but the fact is
those things help propel us, butwe can't go back to yesterday.
So what can we do today that isrelevant for today to propel us
forward?
We talk about the young people.
Do not look down upon thembecause they're young.
If we think about that verse,he was talking about people in
(30:29):
church as well as people incommunity.
I don't believe that sometimeswhen people look down on us is
because they're intentional indoing us harm.
They may just not understandwhere you're going, the things
that you're talking about, thedream that you have.
You look around us today andthere's so much technology And
some of the things that youngpeople are talking about you
(30:49):
know even we that are just onegeneration behind them don't
understand.
So you think about thegrandparents and other people.
It's like we don't have a cluewhat you're talking about.
Our children are exposed to somuch information to me.
I don't know if this isscientifically proven or not,
but it seems to me that ourchildren are exposed to there in
one day, more information thanmost of us were exposed to in
(31:13):
our entire life growing up.
Now, whether they use it or notis another thing, but they have
it in the internet, they haveit in Instagram, they have it in
all of these things.
Youtube you ever been onYouTube and just do a search for
a word and see how much videoscome up.
That's true.
You want to learn how to fix awindow.
You don't even have to go tolibrary anymore.
(31:34):
Just go on YouTube and you havea window to do it.
Some of our grandparents don'teven understand what YouTube is,
so I don't think they'relooking down on us in a negative
way, it's just I don'tunderstand what you're talking
about.
I don't understand how thiseven pertains to me.
So I want to engage withtechnology and be willing to
learn from young people aboutthings that are happening.
(31:58):
Partner with them in a way thatyou can learn, if you don't
know how to use your cell phone,as your grandchild, and they'll
be happy to teach you how touse it.
But don't put down the cellphone because we don't have
another phone like it used to be, and you guys are always on
your cell phone and all thatkind of stuff.
The second thing is try tocreate a judgment-free
environment, a place where youngpeople can come and have open
(32:19):
discussion, ask questions, learnsomething.
We were growing up.
There were a lot of things thatwere not our purport to even
talk about.
Today, our young people want totalk about them.
They want to talk abouteverything because they're
running into it.
In our day we had to go to thelibrary to find out certain
(32:40):
things In our day.
These young people just type itin and it's like oh, what does
that mean, mom?
Oh, okay, let me go and do someresearch And also don't be
afraid to say, hey, I don't know.
I need to go and learn aboutwhat you're talking about.
And then the other thing I wantto talk about is better
understand the community inwhich we live in.
(33:02):
It's different, it's different,it's not different, it's not
bad or good, it's just different.
Things happen differently,things think differently.
The kids are being taughtdifferently.
They're being in school, theywant to dress differently, they
want to listen to differentmusic.
But I believe that at the heartof it, young people still want
to be part of a family, stillwant to be part of a core group,
(33:23):
they still want to feel wanted,they want to have their
questions answered and they wantus to be authentic with them.
The other thing I would say isopen up your home as a place
where young people can hang out,because what happens in a home
I don't know if you noticed thisin a church is when you invite
people into your home, there isan additional level of
(33:44):
relaxation, an additional levelof sharing, an additional level
of community.
That happens.
That's why, in the Bible,whenever there was a covenant or
there was a treaty or somethingto be taken, the people
gathered in a circle in a homeor in a place.
They shared a meal, they washedhands together, washed feet
together, but it was alwayswithin that context of a
community of where it is.
(34:06):
They didn't go and sit down in aconference room and just sign
it and leave.
You had to have tea first, youhad to have dinner first, you
had to talk about everythingfirst, and they sort of created
that place where people can askquestions.
The Bible talks about in Psalm1-3, being planted by a river of
water that brings forth fruitin the season, and the only way
(34:27):
we can bring forth fruit is ifwe are planted.
We understand the soil we arein, we understand the nurture of
the soil how are we going togrow and that there is a season
for that fruit, and it may notbe the season that we think it
is, but the season may be thatGod wants it to be.
So one of the things we talkedabout earlier we were getting
into is the community and thisattention in a family that could
(34:51):
arise because people are on thesame page, and I think that we
see this here in Timothy thatPaul was saying everybody is not
always on the same page,timothy.
So part of your job, this youngman coming into this place
where some of the people are oldenough to be your grandmother
or your mother they probablyknew them.
(35:11):
Your job is to help get them onthe same page, at least to the
point that they can move thatchurch, that community forward
in understanding.
It doesn't mean that everybodyhas to agree, but you create a
level of understanding that wecan move forward together, talk
together, even have argumentstogether.
(35:32):
That's not always bad.
Sometimes you need to have anargument because somebody has
something to say.
Let them say what they have tosay and then go from there.
Because if we tell them theycan't say, you don't know what
happens Resentment, pain, theanger.
They come into the room nowthey leave it a separate anger.
You wouldn't talk to me, youwouldn't let me say whatever.
And the opportunity we had tosolve a problem now becomes
(35:55):
worse Because the next time theycome they come with more anger.
Anderson Kellman (35:59):
And they will say anyway.
Grantley Martelly (36:02):
If they don't say to you, they're going to
say to somebody.
That's what Paul was tellingTimberty create that place,
because they had dissension,they had disunity, they had
false doctrine, he's saying.
create a space for them tobecome and dialogue.
Martel Farley (36:19):
I believe you were listening intently as you
were, and the information sharedis so relevant when it comes to
legacy in the family And yousee, the importance of the youth
blending with the older one.
that's what it word.
that's what I hope you learn.
you know, it is not a casewhere we are supposed to be
(36:42):
segregated or segmented.
part and parcel of the familyAnd this is replicated in the
church.
The concepts here that we talkabout, that should be in the
home, replicated in the churchas well, because you have church
family, you have the bloodfamily, church family.
Some of the commonalities arevery, very real.
Anderson Kellman (37:01):
Well, welcome back to you, And we're having
quite an interesting discussionand I listened very well to my
family and I was thinking aboutthe generation gap, you know,
and basically what he has said.
It will see me as though thatis a wrong making If those kind
(37:24):
of risks are there, where weallow for open dialogue, where
we have a size that's about allthe folk we may not be fully
aware of all the things that wedo now.
He mentioned internet.
Has been one of those elements.
You know, the cell phone thatis so removed from the rotary
phone of many years ago.
(37:47):
Right, there has to be a senseof understanding that we don't
all speak the same language, youknow, and to create the
opportunity, the environmentwhere persons can feel and share
their thoughts, share theirconcerns and also learn from
(38:08):
each other as well, so that wecan maintain useful dialogue.
And in that case then that issueof generation gap will
obviously become, obviouslyshrink in a sense.
And of course, that also haslots of other components
attached to the early, thebelief systems.
Right, you know and we began totalk a little bit earlier the
(38:32):
whole issue of our parentstelling us things like, you know
, stay from our culture.
You know I want the whole, notthe fort for you, you know,
obviously has no back door, andso it became a river from the
sea.
Now it is the tremendouseconomic power that I would say
(38:52):
on the water.
So I think that we need toreally begin to look at how we
can engage, change that kind ofthinking That sort of thing,
because legacy can be shaped.
Grantley Martelly (39:04):
Yes, yes, yes , legacy can definitely be
shaped.
Martel Farley (39:07):
Yes, Well, so take on that I'm finding.
Yeah, i mean so think go ahead,yeah, the whole idea of
occupation.
we focused on the historicalcontext.
Grantley Martelly (39:21):
Yeah, so the whole idea of occupation.
So when I was growing up, youknow I had and I can't
necessarily attribute this to mymother, whoever I'm a product
society, but my idea was you hadto be a doctor, a lawyer or a
politician, because those arethe only three people I saw who
seemed to have money, who seemedto have anything else?
right, that was my context.
(39:41):
My mother was very out of thecountry.
Martel Farley (39:44):
No, i'd teach her a policeman Well.
Grantley Martelly (39:46):
I could have been a teacher because I was
actually recruited to be ateacher before I left Barbados
It's not glamorous And I wasrecruited to be in the Defense
Force actually, and if you thinkabout it, at that time there
was a lot of opportunity in theDefense Force, right, but they
were still building the DefenseForce when we got out of high
school, right, but I neverthought about agriculture and
that kind of stuff, you know.
(40:07):
But if you think about it, whenour grandparents and parents
said, you know, i don't want tosee a horn in your hand and that
kind of stuff, they werethinking about it from the
context of slavery and poorslavery and being on
sharecroppers and working theland and physically there.
I don't think they werethinking of it in terms, first,
you could actually own the land.
(40:28):
There you go.
I just worked the land.
There you go, but you could ownthe land.
That's the first thing.
Second thing how do you do itdifferently?
I don't think they evenperceived the fact that today
there are farmers out there whoown land and who have computers
that decide when to turn on thewater and when to shut off the
water, when to harvest and whennot to harvest, right?
(40:49):
I've seen things where growersnow have these heat maps and,
instead of just watering thewhole field, it only shows them
where the water is below acertain amount, and that's what
comes on When they come toharvest it.
The field is mapped out rightAnd the harvesters out there and
it's empty and the farmers gotan iPad watching the tractor go
(41:10):
and harvest.
You know tons.
In one day.
They can do more work than allof those plantation workers did
in a week.
That's a completely differentview of agriculture than our
grandparents had, and our greatgrandparents had right.
So they were telling us withinthe context of what they
understood, and that's why todayit's so important, as we build
generational and thismulti-generational is to
(41:32):
understand that sometimes, whenthe young people are talking
about something, they're talkingabout it in a vision that is
sometimes beyond.
So give them a hearing What youcan have.
Give them a hearing.
Trust them.
You know, when they say I wantto start my own business.
For us and for our grandparentsand stuff, starting your own
business was just this reallytough thing.
(41:53):
But now I tell young people allthe time you can be anything
you want to be.
And here's the thing in this21st century, if it doesn't
exist, you can create it.
It's true.
Did you ever get taught thatyou can create your own world.
Anderson Kellman (42:11):
No, that was not part of our system.
We were in some ways we were inthe community to believe that
we have to basically work withwhat is there?
Right, You know, we leaveschool and you find a job.
That is there, Yes, You know.
So the whole idea now of beingan entrepreneur, you know we're
(42:34):
not entirely new because we knowthat there were other.
Grantley Martelly (42:37):
There were entrepreneurs you know Sal and
the Marrake harvesting therewere entrepreneurs Who pay the
way.
Martel Farley (42:42):
We didn't call them that.
Yeah right, the Hawker, yeah,the Hawker.
That seemed to have been astage.
The big farmer, yeah.
Anderson Kellman (42:49):
That seemed to be a big happy-ness stage that
was there to fuel those whowanted to become doctors and
lawyers, and stuff right Becausethe Hawker and the big farmer
had a perception because theirchildren became a doctor.
Martel Farley (43:05):
Right.
Anderson Kellman (43:06):
The reason for those black businesses, it's
true, i mean the thought wasthat our children should become
professionals, professional.
And once they becameprofessionals.
They left to find a business.
Yeah right.
Martel Farley (43:16):
And that is kind of difficult, because to me we
have any bad business.
There are some bad businesses,but once the owner has done the
business, they do business aswell.
Grantley Martelly (43:27):
Yeah, see, because they didn't build that
legacy.
Martel Farley (43:30):
This is important , right, see, you put your big
kid in the legacy.
Grantley Martelly (43:32):
But then when you look at other communities.
Martel Farley (43:35):
The other community is not the same thing.
Grantley Martelly (43:38):
They teach those children to carry on, to
carry on, to carry on.
They teach them to beentrepreneur, they teach them to
be farmer.
They teach them to own the landYou talk about by the sea.
We didn't think about going bythe sea and there's too much
salt and the thing your housewrought out and all that kind of
stuff.
And now you look at theproperties close to the coast
(43:58):
Very expensive, very expensive,right, odo Barit, yeah, and
those people are asking abouthow much is it gonna cost to
replace my roof every 10 years?
because it's gonna wrought out,right, because they've been
taught you can make enough thatwhen it comes to replace your
roof you just do it.
So that's not an obstacle.
The obstacle is the opportunity.
The obstacle is the opportunity.
(44:20):
Sure, the sea ain't got no backdoor, but most tourists who
come in here not even going farenough that the back door even
matters, The back door evenmatters, but you know what I'm
talking about.
Anderson Kellman (44:32):
I think, though, that this whole idea of
legacy, though, has suchsignificant implications I mean
not just in terms of interest tocome, but I think even now
we've all been able to talkabout and address these issues
are critical And shaping what isto come, because I think that
(44:57):
there's some things that havecome down to us that are no
longer relevant, i mean backwhen they were said to us all,
when they were in ourconstructable minds.
It made sense because that'swhere they were, and so I think
what has happened is that wehave accepted things a lot stuck
in barrel, without this kind ofanalysis, and I think that
(45:19):
we've heard of our own journeyis to come to these points of
analysis and see what makessense, what does it, and
hopefully, we make somecorrections.
And, for example, what yourbusiness?
I think the point that ReverendMacha made.
(45:39):
It's so poignant that businesscan be just as a generational
thing.
If we want generation, as wesay, across the generations in,
how can we build on our fathersbe, how can we build on our
mothers' business?
how can we, you know, how canwe not, you know, come along and
build on?
our father left, our fatherleft, you know.
(46:00):
So it becomes more of a broaderscope.
Yeah, i just think it's anunnarrow, unnarrow perspective.
Martel Farley (46:08):
Well, the time has disappeared already.
It's have two minutes to go,but it's a discussion.
You know, viewers, we obviously, our sessions are discussion
starters.
So perhaps you can start adiscussion in your church, in
your family, the whole idea oflegacy, and that's what we
sought to do here.
Get new thinking so thatperhaps you can have yourself
(46:29):
turn into a sit-down as familyand bring your different members
together and tell us some jokesand have some food, and I mean
even that food in turn, the oneyou use, not what you used to
use then.
So it's really, reallyimportant, and it has personal
component to it as well.
All right, reverend Martelly,just find out where's the minute
(46:50):
also, and then you'll have ourclosing pre.
Grantley Martelly (46:53):
So I give you one quick example and then one
verse.
My mother-in-law for a longtime had a flip phone.
She didn't want to upgrade.
But then she started havinggreat-grandchildren And she
wanted to see them.
She saw her sister had an iPad,talking to her grandchildren
because her daughter worked forDisney.
She was like what is this?
(47:13):
Three months later mymother-in-law was using the iPad
because her motivation was Iwant to see my grandchildren
great-grandchildren.
No more flip phone, right.
So she learned, she madetwo-generational leaps because
she wanted to see that She'sindeed indeed.
And Psalm 13 says bless is theman who's planted by the water,
(47:36):
rivers of water that bring forthfruit in its season.
I want to encourage you tothink about that differently To
be planted by rivers of water,understand the water, understand
the value of water, understandthe value of land, what seed
needs to be planted, when, sothat you can bring forth fruit
in its season.
And sometimes, when we plant,we also got to realize we don't
know everything.
A good farmer will tell youthey're always learning.
That's right, right.
(47:57):
So how can we teach thatagricultural mentality, that
farming mentality, whether youchoose to be a farmer, choose to
be a preacher, a teacher, abusinessman, understand that you
got to be planted by water andyou got to understand land and
culture and soil and sun andmoon new moon, half moon, full
moon so you can bring forthfruit in the season.
Martel Farley (48:16):
Yes, Beautiful thought to end the whole
discussion with legacy AndReverend.
I tell you thanks so much.
Grantley Martelly (48:24):
Thank you for having me.
We enjoyed the discussiontremendously.
Martel Farley (48:27):
May God bless you and your ministry.
Grantley Martelly (48:30):
So if we are to leave a rich family legacy,
it has to be built, it has to besome intentionality involved.
It has to include interactions,understanding, modeling,
creating safe places and, mostof all, enjoying life together.
The material things that weaccumulate are simply a bonus of
(48:52):
our legacy.
Your legacy is substantially inyour hands.
Remember to subscribe and leaveus a rating.
Ratings are very important tohelping our podcast succeed in
the podcast universe and helpingit become known to other people
.
Email us your comments atabovethenoise24 at gmailcom, And
(49:16):
follow us on Instagram andFacebook at abovethenoise24.
Thank you for listening.
Please share this episode withyour friends.
Popular Podcasts
United States of Kennedy
United States of Kennedy is a podcast about our cultural fascination with the Kennedy dynasty. Every week, hosts Lyra Smith and George Civeris go into one aspect of the Kennedy story.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com