August 12, 2025 • 63 mins
Growing up as the oldest of seven daughters in rural Nova Scotia, Dalene Allen learned entrepreneurship at her mother's handcraft shop, "The Killick." This early exposure to business relationships became the foundation for her remarkable career through retail merchandising, executive positions, and eventually leading Business Network International (BNI) across three Atlantic provinces.
Dalene shares game-changing perspectives on networking that challenge conventional wisdom. Rather than approaching events with sales in mind, she advocates for human connection first—"When you build the relationship, business happens organically." Her three-part interaction formula has proven to have generated millions in business for herself and others.
For those who dread networking events, Dalene offers practical wisdom born from experience. Whether you're looking to grow your business, advance your career, or simply build more meaningful connections, Dalene's approach to "Networking Naturally" provides a refreshing alternative to traditional networking tactic, not to mention her own personal story has a lot more twists and turns than you may think! Join us for a pint at The Clayton Park Bar & Grill, as we uncover what exactly makes Dalene so great at bringing people together.
Kimia Nejat of Kimia Nejat Realty
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Cheers.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome to the Afternoon Point.
I'm Mike Tobin, I am MattConrad, and who are we?
Speaker 1 (00:05):
having with us today Darlene Kurnia Al.
I'm so glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Nice to meet you here .
Thank you so much for coming by.
So I guess, to the peoplelistening, who is Darlene.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
A girl from Glenmargaret, nova Scotia, on
the road to Peggy's Cove, theoldest of seven daughters.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Okay, okay, and you're the networking queen.
I am the networking queen,you're the networking queen,
absolutely.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
My name rhymes with queen.
There you go, my mother, whenwe were bad, as little kids used
to say I'd like to crown you soqueen of networking.
Delete, there you go.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Okay, that's it.
But realistically, you've had alarge reach.
So I mean there are probably alot of people that are going to
listen to this, that are goingto know your name, know your
face, simply for lots ofdifferent reasons.
I mean, you were the executivedirector is what the title was
for BNI.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Business Network International.
That's correct For Nova Scotia,new Brunswick and Prince Edward
Island.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Yeah, so that would have reached probably thousands
of people alone, right?
Speaker 1 (01:09):
BNI's in 80 countries .
330,000 members that pass abetter quality referral.
That generated last year about$26 billion US in new business
for BNI members.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Right, wow, and then you also have your own, like
other business of networking,naturally.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Exactly.
If you think back to being kidsin school, did they ever teach
us how to make a friend Right?
Cbc just did a program thatadults are having a hard time
making friends.
So to actually learn how tonetwork and enjoy it is what
usually is not comfortable formost people, but you know.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
Do you think COVID set people back a little bit
Like about?
You know, just the naturalnetworking of things and being
social or whatever?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Well, I certainly think that, because of COVID, we
learned how to use other tools,which weren't bad.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
But it left us craving for human connection in
a much bigger way.
That's why what you folks aredoing, people love listening to
it.
Because that's what we want.
We want to make thoseconnections.
We want something deeper thanjust a handshake.
It's like a relationship, andmost people don't realize that I
have a podcast Network EqualsNet Worth.
(02:19):
And it is not about money, itis the relationships, if you
think about it, because you twolikely have pretty phenomenal
networks.
okay, it is those of us that hadthat support system that got
through COVID right, I mean Ireached out to people that would
likely have never given me thetime of day during COVID and
(02:39):
they wanted to talk.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Seriously, yeah, yeah to talk.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
And then, now that you know the world is opening up
, I think that for many peoplethey're out of the habit and
it's like anything else Ifyou're out of the habit, it's a
little harder to get back intothe habit.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
It's interesting what you say there, because where a
lot of people probably mostpeople really probably took the
time to kind of recoil and, youknow, go ah, the world's closing
down, so let's just close downand whatever, you actually saw
it as an opportunity to takeadvantage of.
Like no one's doing this, sowhy don't I just be the one to
do it?
Well, I don't think I was theonly one, but still you were one
(03:17):
of the people that did where,like 90% of the people were not
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Yeah, so I'm the queen of little things.
That's how I built any businessthat I've ever had.
And so a person a long time agobuilt a million-dollar business
before COVID, but sitting onhis butt back home reaching out
to people on social mediabecause he really wasn't a
person that enjoyed networking.
And so he said to me, Dillian,just make one new connection a
(03:42):
day.
And so I've done that over theyears and literally I do it
every day.
One new connection I'm lookingfor.
When was the last time youupdated your profiles?
I'm looking for a humanconnection.
A lot of people on their socialmedia, you know they share
things but they don't reallyshare who they are.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Right.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
And when you can find a human connection, I believe
business will happen organically.
So human connection.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I believe business will happen organically.
So how do you?
How?
It's a twofold question, Iguess, but like how do you reach
out to people, how do you makea connection every day and how
do you make sure it's authentic?
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Okay.
Well, first of all, if theydon't have a picture, are they
posting?
You know, if they.
I'm amazed at how many peoplehave a profile and don't bother
doing it, don't do anything withit.
But those that are out thereliking, sharing, commenting,
don't just do the like button.
People fall in love with thelike button.
(04:33):
If you really admire somebody,like, share, comment, say at
least five words, because you'renow in the algorithms.
And people are going to startnoticing you, but what?
I like to do is go in andcompliment somebody, because
most of us, especially whenyou're self-employed, somebody's
not patting you on the back.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Yeah, and we've said this a couple times on our show,
where we've said people don'tquite realize that liking,
sharing, commenting is digitalcurrency that is free to give to
business people and all that.
Like you know, a like, a shareand a comment on this, say, when
this post goes up on socials,it costs someone maybe five
(05:14):
seconds of their life and helpsreach a bunch of other people,
right, so it's a great thing.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Well, and your wonderful podcast on human
trafficking I have liked sharedevery time I see that going
around.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I noticed that Because exactly.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
You've nailed it.
Okay, people will like it, andyou want to go winking in the
dark?
Okay, like.
Share comment.
And if you're going to commentfive words or more, but do it in
the way of a question.
Hey what do you think of this?
Isn't this terrific?
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Hey, what do you think of this?
Isn't this terrific?
What do you think?
And that not only keeps it backin the algorithms, which
supports the person who took thetrouble to make that, but
you're now in the algorithms.
Okay, I'll give you an example,because we closed on B&I and
Donna Major-Smith, who's the newexecutive director of B&I,
merit types, who's going to doan amazing job.
I posted before I passed on toher, that we're up to 10,000.
(06:08):
And that was a week ago, monday, and people are constantly.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Those 10,000 members?
Is that what you said?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
10,000 people that have commented.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Oh commented, oh wow, well not 10,000, but because
there's enough people commentingon it exactly, it keeps going
and going and going.
Gotcha Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
And so this is where I go in, and anybody that did
that, I do say thank you.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
You know that's the extra step that makes all the
difference in the world.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
A hundred percent it does.
I appreciate thank you so much.
Yeah, exactly yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Yeah.
So let's rewind a little bit,because we will come back to
explore that, but let's rewind alittle bit and let's go back to
so we'll go back, like wherewere you at 20 or 40 years ago?
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Like how did this all start?
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Well, my parents my dad was an officer in the Navy.
My mom stay at home.
Mom, nine children.
She could have been a brainsurgeon and she would have had
three nannies in order to keepup, but she was very resourceful
.
We had a beautiful Cape Codhouse set back off the road and
there was a barn at the end ofour very long driveway.
And that was my mother's sanity.
(07:13):
She opened a handcraft shopcalled the Killick, which is a
wooden anchor very familiar herein Atlantic Canada, and we
would be read the riot act thatwhen a person would pull in the
driveway, my mother would runout to the barn to wait on them.
And she would say when she leftthe house if any of you come
out before that car leaves thedriveway, you do not get a treat
(07:34):
.
And so you know, as the carsmake it to the end of the
driveway, we're all runningright.
I'm the oldest of seven, so themantra I grew up with set an
example.
You have six younger sisters.
So as we all got older, we wereencouraged to make things and we
would take turns working in theshop and my mom gave us a
(07:55):
little percentage of what shesold, and so she was very
resourceful.
Also, she would only sellhandmade crafts.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
So she really instilled like that
entrepreneurship in you early.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Well, here's the interesting part my dad go to
school, get a good educationhandmade crafts.
So she really instilled thatentrepreneurship in you early,
eh.
Well, here's the interestingpart my dad go to school, get a
good education and work for thegovernment.
My mother she wanted her sevendaughters.
The mantra I grew up with mydad was I'm not paying for your
weddings.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Just so you understand really early on.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
I'm not paying for your weddings, my mother wanted
her daughters to not bedependent on a man.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
And I have two older brothers as well, but we really
should have aspired to more.
Now, luckily, I grew up with amentality that was not money
doesn't grow on trees or thingslike that.
You know, we may not be rich,but, we're honest, we did not
hear that it was a matter of ifyou wanted extra money, we got a
(08:48):
weekly allowance.
That was the only good partabout getting older.
Your allowance got bigger.
But other than the allowance, alist on the inside of a
cupboard door that if you wantedmore money, right, that that's
what you needed to do.
Now imagine that many people.
Luckily, we had a really nicebig house.
We had a couple of bathroomsback in the day when most people
(09:09):
only had one.
And it was you want to makeextra money?
Clean the bathroom.
It's where you made the most.
Ah oh.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
So there was value, okay, so you saw your mother in
the driveway, so she's obviouslyan avid networker.
People coming and going right.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
And met people all over the world.
She was brilliant in thataspect and she used to say only
do this to get back-to-schoolclothes in Christmas, Right?
So at the time, fishermen knitsweaters.
They're still very popular.
We were always looking forsomething else we could do, so
my job that I took on wasknitting.
Fishermen knit sweaters and, ifyou can believe it, in one
(09:45):
summer I likely knit more than40.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Wow, oh wow.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
And my mom kept letters of all these people that
were so thankful that I madethem beautiful sweaters.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
It was a million years ago, guys.
I sold them for $30 a pop.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
I was making big money Back then, it would have
been yeah, good money.
How old were you then, do youthink?
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Oh, I was likely 12 or 13 at the time.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Oh my gosh.
Okay, so $30 a pop is good cashYou're darn right Plus.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I could babysit and have a dual source of income
because I could babysit and knitsweaters At the same time.
And knit sweaters.
But I think the most wonderfulmemory was he had to have been
about 6'4".
I had to stand on a ladder tomeasure him.
He was the conductor of the NewYork Philharmonic.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Orchestra.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
I have never seen arms that big.
I mean the guy was massive andI could vision him performing.
And he said can you make thesleeves long enough that you
could roll back the cuffs?
And you know why he wanted todo that?
Because there was nothing heever bought that could roll back
the cuffs and could you make itextra long.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
He was just amazing.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
Now, were you different from your other
siblings in the fact that youhad this entrepreneurism spirit,
or were all your siblings likethat, or how did that work?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
All were pretty crafty so we all made something,
but I would say likely I wasthe most committed, because
being able to have that extrasource of income to pay for the
things that you wanted to so yes, but we were all pretty
resourceful and fortunately havedone pretty well in life.
(11:23):
But what's really kind of neatis, as you see, the next
generation, them sort of takingon the spirit.
I have a nephew.
He's a civil engineer and he'ssoon going to retire his
military and so he's taken up awoodcrafting business.
And he's called it the Killick,and he just creates beautiful
(11:44):
works of art.
My mom did pen and ink sketcheswhich she sold in the shop, and
one of my sisters just startedto do beautiful watercolors.
So I know, my mom is very happy.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Where did you go grow up again, glen Margaret, glen
Margaret, on the road to Peggy'sCove.
On the road to Peggy's Cove,yes, wow.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
And we would have all likely, at one time or another,
worked at Peggy's Cove, becausethat was where you made the big
bucks in the summer.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
Yeah, yeah, that's the truth.
Yeah, I mean even bigger now,obviously, all the stuff that's
grown there.
So, yeah, really good.
So that's awesome.
But you know as you, as you gotolder and you became an adult,
what was like, what was thefirst job you jumped into?
Speaker 1 (12:31):
Well, I studied retail merchandising after high
school.
I had spent part of my youthgrowing up in Ottawa, so I
skipped a grade.
So I actually finished highschool at 16.
Okay, and so I took a two-yearretail merchandising course.
My first job was as Sears atthe management training program.
But my hubby took a job withthe Coast Guard, so we moved to
(12:52):
Sydney.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
You said hubby, so when did you meet your hubby?
How young.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
I met him when I was 17 and I married him when I was
18.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Oh wow, oh my gosh, oh wow.
So you've been together a longtime.
That's good so at 13,.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You started your own business.
You were married at 17?
Speaker 1 (13:06):
18.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
18, sorry, you got life done early, you have to
remember.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
I had six younger sisters.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Yeah no, that's true.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Well, and watch he's about eight years older which
means we're about the same level.
You know what I mean.
So the Coast Guard College inSydney was not necessarily my
favorite place to live, but thenhe took a job in.
Ottawa to eventually work at aplace called Transport Canada
Training Institute.
So I got to work at thenewsstand.
I ran that at the ShadowLaurier Hotel and let me tell
(13:43):
you that was an experience initself.
That was open 365 days of theyear, from 6 in the morning
until about midnight.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Okay, so all the politicians at that time would
have stayed at the Chateau,Laurier.
You know they got a reallygreat rate, and so royalty Queen
Elizabeth waved to me.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Whoa.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Donald Sutherland, margaret Trudeau, I mean you
name it.
Anybody that was on the Hillreally was in there.
The part that I laughed themost, or one of the things that
was kind of funny I was officialsupplier of tobacco and news to
the governor general and theprime minister.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
Oh, no way.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
And every morning two RCMP officers would come in to
get the prime minister'snewspapers and I used to laugh
and go because I'm in there,because if not one of my staff
and you have to stuff thenewspapers.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Who was the prime minister at that?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
time.
Oh, that was a long time ago,Pierre Trudeau.
Oh, so it was just as he wasgoing out, but I used to laugh
and go wonder how much it coststo have two RCMP officers
deliver his newspapers.
That's really interesting guys.
And they would just say justgive us a papers to leave.
And I'd say wow bodyguards isnot great, but anyway, yeah,
(15:00):
lots of celebrities, it washilarious.
Lots of celebrities, it washilarious.
The other part that was so neatwas equal opportunity, employer
before Pride and things likethat came into being.
My whole staff was gay and wehad the best time.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Yeah, so I've been an ally for the queer community
forever.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
But we had you know, it was just a really fun place.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
You never know who was going to walk through the
door.
Would you say that was like.
I mean, obviously you had earlyon, with your mother being the
entrepreneur and the amount ofpeople that would stop through.
Would you say that that reallykind of put the power of
networking into hyperdrive,because that would seem like a
huge opportunity to really kindof?
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Well, to be willing to talk to people.
But, here's the interestingpart we had glass cases in the
handcraft shop.
As long as I stood behind thatcounter I was confident he took
me outside of that.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
You melted, yeah right.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
You know it's one thing that if somebody's been an
employee for a long time andthen you become a person who is
now self-employed, the wholeidea of you selling yourself
sometimes stops people.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
That yeah, so did you have any mentors like out there
now, like you?
So you're out there in thispart of the world you're now.
What was the trajectory thatgot you to this start, when you
became an avid networker?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
during retail merchandising when I took that
program the woman who was one ofthe instructors had gone to a
very famous school in bostonmerchandising, so yeah, I sort
of figured she really gave us ahead start.
Sears management program.
There was a person there, but Iwasn't there that long because
we moved sydney.
I worked for a businessman.
(16:41):
He was a character Well, in hisfavorite line.
If you could only learn tothink like a mandolin, you'd be
perfect.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
Oh my gosh, yeah, the things that that won't work
today.
Yeah, yeah, Well, it stillhappens likely.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
But then the United Cigar Store had a management
trading program as well, andthat would have been likely one
of their top places in canada.
I mean, we had a cigar humidorsecond to none.
Um, and again I got invited tothe governor general's garden
party, the pm garden the holidaythings right you know, so you
kind of go.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
I wasn't very old at the time, but you kind of go,
wow yeah, but you get yourselfin all the right rooms yeah, you
know from a networkingperspective, and then other
people are probably interestedand they want to see you right
or talk to you.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
How many politicians we would get to talk to on a
daily basis.
Oh, you're from Nova Scotia.
You know, this is my writingand I remember at the time
thinking it's a writing.
But anyway, you know I'm notpolitical.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
It's interesting because it kind of brings me
back and we can talk about thislater.
But Mike and I recently did aguest speaking event at one of
your events and I remembersaying at that event to people
who were asking some questions,making sure that you're always,
you know, get yourself into theright rooms, the rooms where
there's important people thatyou can network with, and things
like that, and that's what youdid.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
You got yourself in the right room.
Well, and because I was behindthe counter, I was confident
right.
That running.
You know, as the manager.
I want to speak to the manager.
You come in and you know again.
I don't care whether you're thedeputy prime minister.
You know what can I do for you?
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Right.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Yeah, so I think it was a bit of.
I was very naive at the timebut certainly had what some used
to say is chutzpah.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Yeah, that I was used to talking to people in my
comfort zone.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Right.
So how do you transition thework that you were doing and all
of a sudden come to BNI?
It's like how did BNI happen.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
There was a big business in between there.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Oh, okay, let's go to the big business.
Yeah, let's go to the bigbusiness.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
First, I would love to tell you about my second job
after.
I started to work for a textilecompany to make things, and so
I was manager of a big store onSpark Street in Ottawa, but very
quickly they offered me a jobas a buyer for their head office
in Montreal.
Excuse me, I did that and sothis company.
(19:08):
It was interesting At that timethe textile business were a lot
of people from concentrationcamps a lot of.
Austrian, hungarian, you know abig Jewish population, and so I
learned some things that youknow touched my heart.
These people, many of themstill, were very positive about
(19:29):
life, but a lot of them werevery angry and I don't blame
them, but it was a very kind ofclosed.
If you weren't part of theJewish community, you weren't
really in.
So, the two fellows that Iworked with were known as the
biggest crooks in the business.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
No way.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
No way, like no way.
So twice a year we got to go toEurope.
Myself and another woman werebuyers.
My department was wool andcotton she had.
She's not part of the Jewishcommunity, but she'd been a
refugee from the war.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
And so her office.
I had to walk by her officeevery day.
She didn't have somebody cryingby nine o'clock in the morning.
She wasn't happy, yeah, and so,very quickly, every day you
walk by, that you go.
Speaker 3 (20:17):
I don't want to do this.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
I love the job that was the sad part and so um.
A supplier one day said to meyou know, you're just like
gertrude and I could never playpoker.
It was like somebody slapped meacross the face.
He said delete.
I mean it as a compliment.
It was like oh, I'm out of here,yeah, you know, one of our
trips to europe, we would make athing through austria,
(20:40):
switzerland.
I mean the fabrics andeverything.
So to understand the business,the designers of fabric, much
like clothing designers, highcouture as long as you have one
repeat of the pattern, they canmake a replica.
So this year it might be soldto you know, chanel and whatever
(21:01):
okay, so they change like handsof like designers?
Oh yeah, you would buy thedesign of the fabric you had
created.
So two or three years from nowyou would see it in cheaper
fabrics by other designers.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
Okay, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
So we would go to all of these textile mills because
usually they would have stuffthat you know was on, special
things that they wouldn't taketo the show.
We would end up with a reallybig textile show in frankfurt,
and so the very first time Iwent there I was like I was
excited, got to see somethingcalled the international color
council, and so they would kindof I mean, I was a babe in the
(21:44):
woods.
Okay, delene, we've got acouple guys who are going to go
with you.
You go in there, so pictureracks and racks of these samples
, put everything you like in thefront of a rack and then leave
quickly.
And the two big guys had bigsample cases and they would go
in and steal them.
No way, oh, my second trip.
(22:06):
I just, you know, I wasphysically sick because you
thought I can't do this anymoreyeah, crazy so, but thank god, I
mean, I got to work withcanadian designers.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
I learned about facelifts there'd be rolls
rosses parked out of our saintcatherine street location, where
all of the beautiful fabrics.
And.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
I'll never forget this woman putting her hand out.
She came in with Simon Chang, abig Canadian designer, and her
face was amazing, but her handwas that of a 90-year-old and
you know, again, it was kind oflike a little bit of an
electrical shock, because you'rethinking, oh, if I ever have a
facelift, I'm going to have ahead.
The things that you do.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Oh my gosh, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, like yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Or somebody coming in , and because in the Jewish
community you usually have to beburied and don't cope with this
like within 24 hours.
So, somebody coming in and sayI need a pattern.
With this color fabric in it,can you make me a dress in a day
?
And you think okay, jewishfuneral.
You might want to edit all thatout.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
No, no, that's fine.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
No, that's fine.
Yeah, I know they sit Shiva forseven days and stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
That's probably after the burial yeah, yeah.
So what happened to these guys,though that were stealing the
stuff, Did they?
Speaker 1 (23:20):
get busted.
Well, if they caught them.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
They never got caught .
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Well, they were big yeah.
They had big sample cases andyou know, I mean, after a while
it was kind of like you knowthey were, they, the people that
they knew, were usuallystanding outside the door.
So if they got a look at themthey'd go you with them and then
they'd go.
Okay, delene, still pick it up,and I'm thinking I don't want
to pick it up, I just want to gohome.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
Anyway, yeah, great story, not exactly buyer, trips,
well yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
And then Joe took a job back and we wanted to come
home and Montreal.
It was the end of it.
But the FLQ and billboards-blowing up?
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Oh right, yes, of course.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
I don't speak French, we just, you know it was more.
We wanted to go home.
My father-in-law had been topsales in Canada for National
Cash Register for many years,even though he just had Halifax
North.
You know all the way to CapeBreton, and he said when I met
(24:27):
Joe, he said you know, I'vealways told Joe he needs to have
a business.
He'll never have a business,but you will Delane.
So when we moved back fromMontreal we started to look
because we knew we were cominghome, and we looked into a
couple of franchises we couldhave had.
Maybe a McDonald's inCornerbrook or Port Hawks.
I had a friend that had a TimHorton.
She said you do not want to bea day-old donut.
And the big thing aboutfranchises they didn't have
(24:49):
Baskin-Robbins.
When we lived in Ottawa welived next door to a.
Baskin-Robbins, my husband wouldhave eaten all the profit, like
all the profit.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah, that's fair.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
So, because I had experience in tourism, we looked
into purchasing a smallconvenience store that had quite
a big property and we thoughtwe could turn that into
something.
We actually put an offering onit, my husband's like please
don't buy it.
Please don't buy it, because wehad a sailboat and he loved to
fly fish for salmon.
And he said you want to openthat business, don't expect any
(25:20):
help from me.
And the more I thought about itbecause when you work in
tourism, you expect any helpfrom me.
And the more I thought about itbecause when you work in
tourism, you're giving up thebest part of what you're doing
here.
And so a friend of mine who hada very successful retail job in
Toronto, mary Kay, had just cometo Canada, been here about not
even three years, and she said,delene, I gave up my job and I'm
(25:42):
driving a pink Cadillac and Iremember thinking I didn't have
a license.
That'd be a Cadillac, nice,lawn over it.
So she said, why don't you giveit a try?
And honest to God, I think, Joe, my husband said, just give it
a year.
Anything would have been betterthan owning that tourism
business.
(26:03):
And sure enough, within theyear I was making six figures
and drove a pink Cadillac.
I did not have a driver'slicense, but they delivered it
anyway.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
So you had a pink Cadillac, just couldn't drive it
, yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Unbelievable.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
Yeah, that's, I don't know not wrong with that.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So what was this?
So when was this Mary Kay thingIn?
The early 80s, early 80s, sowas this like when it was first
popping off, because this hasbeen around for decades now.
Well, I think 65 years now.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
But it had only just come to Canada.
Mary Kay was first in theUnited States, second Australia,
then third franchise was Canada.
So I knew nothing about skincare, color cosmetics.
But they said they trained meand I was willing to learn, and
because I didn't drive a car, Itook the bus or rode it on my
bicycle.
I was thinner then too, andMary Kay trains you right.
(26:57):
And luckily Mary Kay Ash, thefounder of the company, was
still active enough that I wasmentored by her personally.
And her very best friend isDaylene White.
Except in Dallas they call herDay-lane.
And so, mary Kay, it was thefirst time I'd ever seen the
same spelling of my name, havethey?
Speaker 2 (27:16):
ever made a movie about Mary Kay?
They have.
They have, yeah, because that'san extraordinary story.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Oh, she listen to be in that woman's presence.
Yeah, she was a powerhouse.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Is Mary Kay still a big thing?
Oh, mary Kay, yeah, number ninedirect sales globally, I think.
So it's still this people arestill doing because there's so
many things like that, now,right, come and go.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Yeah, exactly if it's a real opportunity.
It'll hang around yeah, and sothey've been able to adjust as
they go into markets.
Asia's a very big one, southamer America 33 countries.
I had five global markets thatI worked in.
But Mary Kay's best friend hername was Delene White, spelled
(28:01):
the same way as me, and so Iknew Mary Kay well enough that
she said you're my Canadiandaily.
My mother hated it that theydidn't say my name the same way
she thought it would.
So, yeah, the woman was justincredible.
She really had a presence, andwhen you do really well in life,
they take you through kitchens,they take the celebrities.
(28:23):
You don't see the pretty partsof the hotel.
They take you the back way, andso I've been in a lot of
kitchens with Mary Kay Ash overthe years in a lot of different
places.
I've been to her lot ofkitchens with Mary Kay Ash over
the years in a lot of differentplaces.
Been to her home.
I remember she moved into a bighouse the pink house, she
called it and got invited to ahousewarming party with her.
Yeah, she really was amazing.
(28:43):
So that was just as theInternet was really starting to
happen.
So I would have built thatbusiness because once I left
that job and had to hand out abusiness card to somebody, it
was like I'd rather go in thebathroom and throw up.
So I learned very quickly howto make sure I would get
(29:03):
referrals.
And when you build therelationship, business happens
organically.
But people there are somepeople who are just natural
connectors and when you can findthose people, treat them like
gold.
So every year about 20 peoplewere likely could provide 30 to
(29:25):
40% of my new business everyyear.
So when people are doing that,that's huge, oh yeah, but what
they would refer to as socialcapital today is when you're
providing value to people.
Three things I said to peopleat every interaction.
Thank you so much for yourbusiness.
I sure hope you know how much Iappreciate you.
Second, the greatest complimentyou can pay me is referrals.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Yep Right.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Uh-oh, I didn't know that.
If you don't say that to people, they don't necessarily know.
Third, if ever I can help youpersonally or professionally,
please reach out.
I know a lot of people that Itrust.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
And so I'd sold that business.
That's coming up to 10 years,the end of this year, 2025.
About three years ago, a womancalled me and she said, Delene,
I was going to press Google.
Then she said I'm going to tryyour phone number.
Seven years she remembered myphone number.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Oh no way.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Okay, she called me.
I knew her mom, I knew her, Iknew her kids.
And she said first we had anice catch up.
And she said at the end I wasgoing to press Google, but I
need three things.
Sure enough, I could make threeintroductions.
Why press Google, google, but Ineed three things.
Sure enough I could make threeintroductions.
Why press Google, call D'Lien?
Most people are not willing tobuild the relationship, to take
(30:38):
that investment of time.
See what you folks are building20 years from now, people are
going to love it as much, if notmore.
Speaker 3 (30:46):
No, thank you.
Thank you, I hope so.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
But I mean to you, though, to have this insight, to
see BNI, and I mean I've seenyou in action.
I've seen you in action invarious roles, like through my
professional life.
So I can go back 10 years whenI was working for another
company and I met you.
And I met you 10 years later,working for a different company,
and I mean, what's consistentis there's a few things that you
(31:10):
have.
So one of them is authenticity.
Right, you're a delightfulperson to talk to.
So, even though I probablygenuinely I'm not one that likes
to get out of my own skin a lotso there's people probably
listening to this and saying I'mnot a great networker Well,
you're hearing one right now.
Like, I don't really love goingout and interacting a whole lot
(31:32):
, but someone like you reallygets me out and gets me talking
and gets me chatting, gets mecomfortable.
Right, you're a real enablerfor conversation, which I think
is just which I think is whatvalue you provide.
You're really great at that,and I think that's like what led
you to this B&I moment, whereyou found this company, and just
(31:53):
let us know how you got thereto be an eye well, when I first
started my mary k business I wasa bni member, yeah okay and um,
it was interesting, it was alot of older gentlemen yep
Speaker 1 (32:04):
there weren't many women in in the group, but let
me tell you, I learned alifetime of business skills
within, let's say, a couple ofshort years.
So it was like a mastermindgroup business brains, you name
it and that's really what BNI isall about.
And so, going in there as afairly new person, my business
(32:25):
was gaining momentum.
But you know, when you reachthat imposter syndrome, holy
crap, what am I going to do next?
And that's where they reallyhelped me, right, okay, so that
excuse me that within about twoyears my business had quadrupled
, and I relate that to what B&Iwas all about.
And if the old guys hadn't kepthitting on me, I likely would
(32:49):
have stayed a B&I member a lotlonger yeah yeah.
I mean, when you drive a pinkCadillac, people say some pretty
wild things.
Speaker 3 (32:56):
Oh, that's, probably true.
Oh, yeah, well.
Speaker 1 (32:58):
I remember going on a Newfoundland ferry once.
We were the last car on.
What's next to me is an18-wheeler full of live chickens
and for whatever reason, Ithought last one on, I'll be the
first one off.
And we get up there and we'regoing up the stairs of the
elevator to where we're going onthe Newfoundland Ferry and all
these guys are going what roomare you in?
(33:19):
Because you didn't get thatpink Cadillac for selling makeup
and you kind of go.
I am now going to lock myselfin a room somewhere, right?
Speaker 3 (33:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
But when we got up the next morning, joke was on us
, my friend and I.
We go down and oh, the smell ofchicken poop was just awful and
my car on the left-hand side,big white big pink.
Cadillac white leather top,white leather interior, chicken
shit and feathers.
And there is not at that time,not a car wash till Stephenville
(33:51):
Right and people wouldjustville.
Yeah, right, and people wouldjust point and laugh, right, I
looked like Angora on theleft-hand side.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
My gosh.
Oh, so you were a member of BNI, so when did you take over BNI
and become supreme leader?
Speaker 1 (34:12):
Well based on the business that I built with Mary
Kay Cosmetics in amorphine-induced passing, a
kidney stone.
When they tell you not to makeany major decisions, I happen to
say to my husband it's the besttime to make a decision.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
People tell you not to.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
They tell you not to sign any papers.
I said you know what I shouldretire and Joe just took his
finger and said you said it andbecause I had a big enough
business, barry Kay's stillpaying me right.
He said, okay, well, let's trysomething new.
And he said, yeah, so I fooledaround at a couple of things.
But then somebody had broughtBNI back here.
It hadn't been here for about adozen years and I said I think
(34:48):
I'd like to try that, and myhusband on board and we've had a
great time doing it.
Just amazing people.
Bni has seven core values, butthe number one is giver's gain
and for anybody who goes to anetworking event most people if
you're flight or freeze, you'renormal, if you feel
(35:09):
uncomfortable walking into aroom that's not a person's
comfort zone.
It was not mine in the beginningbeginning, but I learned how to
do things better.
That again I love to see how ithas helped people.
We've only had the franchise,has only been back here about
six years and we've alreadyclosed three or four million
dollars in new business amongbni members so how do you
(35:30):
calculate that new business?
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Do you just say from the referral programs?
Speaker 1 (35:33):
you kind of score what the?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
value of them are.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Well, or if I give you a referral you're the only
one who knows what's in thatreferral.
It's all anonymous right.
If it turns into business youwould thank me to a dollar
amount.
But it's all anonymous who itcame from.
So odds are if you gave me areferral and I would say okay,
mike, thank you very much forthe referral.
(35:57):
Here's the status of what it is, because you want to know if
it's a good referral and whenthat number shows up you know
sometimes it's a lot of money.
So it worked out.
Yes, thank you very much.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Perfect, cool.
How many groups are set upacross the Maritimes?
Speaker 1 (36:15):
There's never been anything in Newfoundland, never
been anything in PEI.
We have a couple started in NewBrunswick and we have a bunch
here in Nova Scotia working on.
The new owner is the SouthShore, the Valley, cape Breton,
truro.
Yeah, okay, there's only thinkof a group of 20 or more
business professionals.
(36:35):
Only one seat per profession.
Yeah, so there's only onerealtor, only one mortgage
broker.
Speaker 3 (36:42):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
It cuts out the competition.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
You can speak freely.
That way too right.
Like you know, if you're comingto this group with your
struggles or you know some ofyour wins and the things that
you're doing to win, you don'texactly insurance business.
You understand what it takes tobuy or sell a house or that, a
mortgage, your interest rate isnot the only thing.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Okay, that you learn so much more about so many more
people, which, again, when thatclient is looking for help and
you could say, look, if you everneed something, reach out and
you can actually make anintroduction to them.
And because it's somebody thatyou see, bni is a commitment of
time and money.
You meet weekly and you pay amembership fee.
(37:39):
You don't pay any commissions,but the fact that if that person
you know like and trust thatclient that's now meeting with
them because there's a level oftrust, the sales funnel fills
and closes faster.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
How do you because, just given the fact that you're
such a center like central pointfor a lot of people, how do you
manage referring business topeople when, say, you know so
many people in business the sameindustry?
Speaker 1 (38:11):
well, I'm so glad you mentioned that, um that you
either try to pass it along ormatchmake.
What's it?
What's this person right?
Speaker 2 (38:22):
you know, let's say realtor.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
There's some people who love to do first-time home
buyers so if this isn't somebodywho's ever bought a house,
who's the person that wouldlikely match the personality as
well right.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
so you play a little bit of matchmaking A little bit.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I have a rule of two.
It's like the Sith, If you'reanything like Star Wars.
I have the rule of two.
I always try to have two peopleand then again it's matchmaking
, but I just try not to havelike 10 people, I just have like
two people.
So it's like two lawyers, tworeal estate agents, two
accountants to mortgage brokers,whatever.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
So here's the thing that I would say back to you now
yeah.
Are they sending referrals toyou?
Speaker 3 (38:58):
Yeah, that's an important part to it.
That's true If it's reciprocal.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
That needs to also be that way too.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
And that speaks back to there.
Are some people who are justnatural connectors Not that
other people can't be, but youat least have to let them know
that you appreciate theirsupport.
I see so many times people withvery close connections, like
you know.
If you've got siblings, haveyou really looked at who their
(39:27):
connections are?
Do they really know how theycan help you?
They don't mean to piss you off.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But if you have not made it clear that, yes, I would
appreciate this from you, youknow.
Speaker 2 (39:42):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What do you think about peoplethat just seem unattracted by
that whole concept?
And I'm just throwing that outthere just to ask you, Because
I'm sure some people probablyjust heard what you just said
and said I don't want to bedoing that, I don out there just
to ask you, like, because I'msure some people probably just
heard what you just said andsaid I don't want to be doing
that.
Speaker 1 (39:59):
I don't want to be asking my brothers and my
sisters.
I didn't say ask, I said atleast inform, because here's the
thing.
Would you be pissed?
If they passed the businessthat could go to you to someone
else that's.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
That's a better way to look.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Yeah, yeah okay because I just find we miss our
warm connections a lot.
Yeah, sure, we do, and youdon't have to offer incentives.
You know, if it's somebody whocares about you, odds are they
would Right.
But if you never tell themright and that doesn't mean that
you know if you know them wellenough you could cut them up the
side of the head or something,or pour the beer on their head.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
No.
Speaker 3 (40:34):
Yeah, no, I mean yeah , that makes a lot of sense.
So now you've sold BNI, so youare.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
I'm going to be a BNI member forever.
Speaker 3 (40:45):
Yes, you said you're going to be a BNI member, but
now it's not your driving forcenecessarily anymore.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
That's why I opened Networking, naturally.
Yes, because what I have foundis here's a story.
I would drive by a group ofhigh school students waiting for
a bus.
It was usually 15 or 20 and Idrove by that bus stop a lot and
they're all doing this on theirphone yep they are likely
talking to each other on theirphone.
There is no eye contact.
(41:12):
There is no.
They don't know how to make aphone call.
They sleep with the damn things, but they don't really know how
to pick it up.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
and actually have a conversation, that's true.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
And then there's people.
Here's the other thing I findPeople get busy.
They stop networking, Okay.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
You can, instead of calling it networking, which
automatically fear vomiting.
You know anxiety if you justsaid what if I made one new
connection a day?
then suddenly here's the otherpart a lot of conferences today,
a lot of networking events, andI usually try to do this with
any of mine that before you goto a networking event, see if
(41:51):
you can see the registrationlist, if you can see the
registration list, I just lookat the people, look at the name,
look at them on LinkedIn and gookay, they got a picture,
they're posting hey, I'm goingto this event, do you want to
meet there?
Speaker 3 (42:04):
Right, okay.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Suddenly going to that event now isn't quite as
intimidating, and I might reachout to four, five, six.
I might not reach out to 20.
They're not all going to bethere, but reach out to enough
that you could have thatconversation with a few people,
and those that didn't were stillconnected.
Speaker 2 (42:21):
Right, so networking naturally.
So I don't want to miss thatwhat you just said, because I
have that on my list here totalk to you about.
So you started networkingnaturally and then you talked
about the younger folks on theirphones.
Yep, so did you create this foryounger people to have to like
kind of get some inroads intonetworking?
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Think about this for a minute.
Cbc did another program on.
By the time you're 28 years old, you'll know the bulk of people
.
You will know your whole life.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
Right.
Speaker 1 (42:50):
Now you and the three of us here.
You meet 50 people a weeklikely.
Speaker 2 (42:54):
Yeah, if not more.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
But if we went back to everybody in high school?
We kept in touch with as manyof them as possible, because 20
years from now, all thedifference in the world
Post-secondary education youcould be in a class with 200
people.
Are you connecting with them?
Okay?
So then, instead of goingnarrow, you're going wide.
And then, if you are in oneindustry, think of that industry
(43:17):
, even if you're an employee,who would that client see before
?
Who would that client see after?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
Right right.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Okay, so that you can be a complement to that.
So if let's say real estate, arealtor, a mortgage broker,
financial services person,insurance person, a realtor, a
mortgage broker, financialservices person, insurance
person, they all deal with aclientele in a complementary,
not competitive, way and justlike you said Matt a couple in
(43:44):
each of those.
So if each of them have 500, byonly making three connections
on LinkedIn to work with, you'renow up to 2,000 connections,
right, okay, you want tomultiply?
You picture one new connection aday five days a week, that's 20
a month.
Over the run of six months,that's 120.
(44:04):
If we do 80, 20, that could be24 new clients.
But if I say to people, go outand get 24 new clients, so it's
really how I built my business.
So I do small group coaching,but also in my years in Mary Kay
, once you're a top director,they didn't bring in outside
speakers.
The only way you ever got to bea trainer, a speaker, whatever
(44:29):
it was you had to prove yourselfwith the company.
Speaker 2 (44:31):
Credit back to you.
I mean sorry to interrupt, butlike the networking, naturally.
Now when we were there, Inoticed you know there's a lot
of folks, a lot of newcomers toour country.
Yep, you know a lot of peoplethat were just getting into the
job market.
You were helping these peopleout, you were giving them their
first kind of dose of anetworking event.
I think a lot of people mighthave only done this five or six
times before in their lives, ormaybe it was their first time.
Speaker 1 (44:52):
Well, and we have a lot of people.
I love the library eventsbecause they come back, because
they're interested, but, yeah,I'm a big believer in because
I've reached the point in lifewhere we are an aging population
, you know.
Number one what can I give back?
But number two if we're notmaking these people feel welcome
, they're not going to stay.
We're not in a good place okay,more important are we making
(45:16):
them feel because we're clicky?
okay, yeah are we making themfeel welcome enough?
Are we doing the extra littlebit?
I mean, think about this.
We spent a total of 23 years,my parents, on the road to
peggy's cove, small, first infrench village and then in Glen
Margaret.
They raised nine children there.
Only three of the nine were notborn in Nova Scotia.
(45:38):
The rest of us all were.
So what people locally wouldsay, right, oh, delene, you're
not from here, we'd go, I wasborn here.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
No, no, you're from away.
Speaker 1 (45:49):
Even though we were a big part of the community.
But that's kind of what we dealwith here.
The other thing I love aboutanybody that comes here, even if
it's from another province theysee the opportunities we're
missing.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
That's true, right.
Speaker 1 (46:03):
And that's what I love.
What you guys are doing isyou're capturing some of that.
Speaker 3 (46:07):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, try to get different people's
perspectives and just listen towhat they have to say.
Speaker 1 (46:12):
Yeah, and just listen to what they have to say, what
I really feel badly for anybodywho comes here in the middle of
the winter if they've left awarm country.
If they're honest, the weathergets better Three months of the
year it's paradise.
Speaker 2 (46:24):
You know what, though ?
Speaker 3 (46:26):
That being said, I work with a few people that come
from a warm country, talking tothem, and they love the winter,
they love it, they love snowbecause they've they never seen
it before.
And then they came in, theyjust fell in love with it and
I'm sitting here going you'renuts yeah exactly great for you
that you love it well, a changeof season.
Yes, yes, yeah, yeah so but theysome of them legit love snow
(46:49):
and I'm just kind of like Iwould be okay if I never saw it
again.
Okay, but you know, Yay forglobal warming.
Yeah, it's funny I say that mywife says stop saying that,
because like I don't necessarily, like you know, I'm obviously
for supporting like improvementsin the climate and all that
stuff, but at the same time I'mkind of like, yeah, all right,
I'm okay with we didn't get snowanymore.
Speaker 1 (47:09):
Kind of Well, I have a friend, he's a tattoo artist.
He moved here from Edmonton andso when he moved he said,
delene, I need to get a plug-infor my car and if you've ever
been to Grand Prairie, dotsonPort.
St John okay, I mean, evenparking meters have plug-ins.
And I said you need rubberboots.
(47:30):
And he said what are youtalking about?
I said when you know you're aMaritimer is when you buy a pair
of rubber boots you do not needa block heater and he's like,
but there's one in my car, Isaid, well, you know, maybe
somebody will find you a plug.
But you know.
So the other day, not too longago, he said to me okay, I have
rubber boots.
I said, yay, you're one of us.
Speaker 3 (47:50):
I started dating my wife 15 years ago.
So I was early mid-20s when Istarted dating my wife and that
was the first time I startedspending a lot of time in Quebec
and I noticed that a lot ofcars were plugged in and I was
just kind of like what the hellis this?
And she was like plug the carin so that the battery doesn't
freeze up.
And I was like what, what areyou talking about?
And then now, so when peoplecomplain about winters, my wife,
(48:13):
who lives here now obviouslyshe's like every winter I'm here
is the best winter I've everhad.
So it's all perspective,exactly 100%.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Yeah, well, we got to get into our 10 questions.
Speaker 1 (48:25):
Let's get into it Before we do.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
I just got one question for you, just on the
networking tip, you know.
I mean, where do you see thefuture of professional
networking heading, especiallyin Atlantic Canada?
Where do you think it's goingto go?
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Well, my mission is to teach people that any room
you're in that's got more thanone or two people, it's an
opportunity.
Are you open to opportunity?
Are you curious about theperson in front of you?
And you're not there to sell.
You're not going to sell at anetworking event.
You're going to find a humanconnection and see if you like
them first, which will eliminatemany of your headaches when you
(49:01):
want to shoot a customer.
Speaker 3 (49:02):
Fair enough.
Yeah, speed dating is what it'slooking like.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Speed dating your business.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
So, all right, let's get into our 10 questions.
We each have five.
Do you want to start or do youwant me to start?
Go ahead, matt.
You want me to start?
All right, cool, all right.
So question number one.
So what's the book title ofyour life?
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Are you allergic to networking?
Okay?
Speaker 2 (49:28):
Okay, I like that.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Or richness in my roots.
Speaker 2 (49:31):
Are you allergic to networking?
I like the first networking.
Speaker 3 (49:32):
I like that I like are you allergic to networking
that would catch people'sattention?
Yeah, I like it.
Alright, number two over toMike.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Alright, if networking was an animal, okay,
what animal would you be?
And why so a bunch of animalsin a room?
You know of the animal kingdom?
What would they lean be?
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Hmm, I'll have to think about that for a minute.
Maybe a rabbit?
Speaker 2 (49:56):
Okay, why did you pick?
Speaker 1 (49:57):
rabbit, they could multiply, hey that's good.
Speaker 3 (50:01):
Grow your network.
Speaker 1 (50:02):
Yeah, that's good, but they're also cute and cuddly
.
There you go, that's a greatanswer, perfect, all right.
Speaker 3 (50:07):
Next question.
So if you could pick entrancemusic like a WWE wrestler, what
song would you pick for yourentrance music?
Speaker 1 (50:18):
oh, shoot um oh just one second I love anything from
mama mia.
What would work something frommama mia?
Speaker 3 (50:30):
I have a dream okay, all right, nice right.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Nice.
Speaker 3 (50:34):
That's good.
If you don't have a dream, I'mnot familiar with Mamma Mia.
Speaker 2 (50:36):
I've got to be honest with you.
Speaker 1 (50:38):
Oh, you've got to Well they should never have
gotten paid for doing that movie.
No.
They had too much frigging fun.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
All right.
Question number four what am I?
Speaker 2 (50:48):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (50:56):
Do you believe in?
Speaker 3 (50:57):
luck or do you think we create our own opportunities
through connection?
The smarter I work, the luckierI get.
You know what?
That's good advice?
And that was advice that wasalso given to me a long time ago
by a professional golfer, likea pga golfer.
I said you know?
I asked what tiger woods?
And he I was like, do you thinkhe's lucky, do you think he's
good?
And he said you know, he saidthe funny thing about him is he
works so hard that on the daysthat he's good, he's good, and
(51:18):
the days that he's not good,he's lucky.
Speaker 1 (51:21):
Well, but you have to remember how old was he when
his dad put a golf club in his100%.
So if you've read any ofMalcolm Gladwell's books
Outliers, he put in more thanhis 10,000 hours in more than
his 10,000 hours Exactly, ohyeah.
Overnight success only takes 15years.
Speaker 3 (51:36):
Yeah, okay, there you go.
Overnight success takes 15years.
There you go, I like it Allright, so next question.
So what is the top place in theworld to visit on your bucket
list?
Speaker 1 (51:48):
Oh Greece.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Greece.
Okay, Really yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:52):
Although Bali in Indonesia was pretty hard to
beat.
Speaker 3 (51:55):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (51:55):
Every year I earned trips from Mary Kay.
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh.
Thailand I ate dinner at thePrince of Siam.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
Siam, the Prince of Siam.
Yes, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
On the Grand Canal.
Wow, yeah, like I've traveledthe world in a custom that most
people would never.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
yeah yeah, yeah, amazing, very cool but yeah,
greece all right all right overto you okay.
Speaker 2 (52:27):
So what's the strangest or most unexpected
connection that you've ever madethat led to something big.
So a strange connection thatyou never thought would you know
you, you're a natural networker.
It led to something big.
Speaker 1 (52:40):
You never saw it coming wow, well, that's a good
one.
I I met somebody that um inpassing that I ended up going to
poland and opening mary k in inPoland when it first happened.
Speaker 2 (52:55):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
Yeah, likely introduced me to a hundred
people before I ever got there.
Speaker 2 (52:59):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (52:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Just same thing in passing.
Speaker 3 (53:02):
Cool.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
All right.
Speaker 3 (53:05):
Good.
Next question so you'reorganizing a network event with
Finger Foods.
What is the one food thatshould never be at a networking
event?
Speaker 1 (53:15):
Anything that needs a fork.
Speaker 2 (53:18):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (53:18):
That's a good question.
Speaker 2 (53:20):
I like that one, so nothing that includes a fork at
a networking event.
Speaker 3 (53:24):
I was thinking something stinky, but yeah,
that's a good point.
Speaker 2 (53:27):
Poutine not good, not good, no yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:32):
Like literally finger food.
Speaker 3 (53:35):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (53:36):
Yeah, preferably one bite.
Speaker 3 (53:39):
Fair enough, makes sense.
Ok, over to you.
Speaker 2 (53:42):
Second last question, yeah, ok.
So if you could host a dinnerparty with any three networkers,
dead or alive, who would it beand why?
Speaker 1 (53:51):
Sam Horn.
I just spent a weekend with herin Austin, texas.
If you've never heard of her,her company's called the
Intrigue Agency BrilliantBrilliant.
I would love it if it were MaryKay Ash again, but she's not
here.
So Dr Ivan Meisner, I've methim personally.
He was the founder of BNI andthat certainly he is still very
(54:17):
active, even though you know BNIis no longer technically his
company.
Who else?
Three people?
Speaker 2 (54:29):
Give me a like a historic.
Speaker 1 (54:30):
I'm happy talking to you two.
Speaker 2 (54:31):
Okay, that's awesome.
Yeah, well, two for one.
But how about give us ahistoric figure?
Oh, a historic figure Likesomebody from any time, dead or
alive.
What do you think of that?
It would just be really nice tohave a networking event with
you.
Speaker 1 (54:41):
Was it Roosevelt, his wife?
What was her name?
Eleanor.
Speaker 2 (54:46):
Eleanor Roosevelt.
Eleanor Roosevelt, verypro-women yeah, nice, love it
yeah.
Speaker 3 (54:51):
Okay, cool On to you, Matt.
So it's our last question.
Speaker 2 (54:54):
Was it Second last question?
Speaker 3 (54:56):
Well, okay, you go then because I have the last
question.
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (54:59):
Sorry.
Okay, I've got another one.
If someone had a networkingspirit guide whispering in their
ear at an event, what would itbe telling them not to do?
Speaker 1 (55:13):
Try to close the sale .
Oh, don't be their heartselling at an event yeah, why
would you sell to somebody ifyou don't even know?
Speaker 2 (55:21):
them Right.
Speaker 1 (55:23):
So if you pretend that somebody's got a sign
around them that says make mefeel important, like when I
would go to a networking event,I'd stand in the corner, I'd
pray somebody would talk to me.
Well, if you stand in thecorner, you don't look friendly
and so you know, after havingdone everything wrong, I would
say okay, I'm going to go standby the door, I'll wave to
anybody I know Hi, I'll talk toyou later.
(55:43):
I'd wait, till.
That person with the deer inthe headlights came through the
door and I would say you lookmore afraid than me, and they
would be.
Sometimes people would hug me.
It's like, oh my God, thank God, and I said I feel just like
you, but now we're together.
Speaker 2 (55:55):
I feel like it's a great time to ask you this Will
you buy ad space in this show?
Yeah, yeah, okay, cool, becausewe've taken a while.
Now I think I've gotten to knowyou.
It's a good time to kind of gofor the close right, exactly,
perfect.
Speaker 3 (56:17):
Okay, you, I know what you deliver, okay, so last
question that we have here.
Speaker 1 (56:19):
so what's one piece of advice that you were given
that you'd like to share with usokay um, be curious, be curious
, yeah, always be curious.
Everybody's got a story to tell.
Yeah, and if you're willing toreally listen, not like a brick
but like a sponge- yeah that youwill.
You will find the most amazingstories from people.
And look at you two.
You could write a book rightnow.
(56:40):
I hope that's in the works.
Speaker 2 (56:41):
Well, I think we found an amazing story today and
I'm very thankful that you cameand told us oh exactly, it's
great yeah you got a great story.
Speaker 3 (56:50):
I think people will find it really interesting.
Yes, we kind of thing Notnecessarily about us, but I
think about our experiences withguests.
Speaker 1 (56:57):
Right, like people, like yourself, okay, but here's
the thing.
You write about their story,but then you write your takeaway
, and you write your takeawayExactly yeah, that's exactly
what I have kind of proposedLike to Matt.
Speaker 2 (57:07):
Already we have a Matt and a Mike section on each
guest.
Speaker 1 (57:10):
So if you haven't heard Sam Horn.
Look her up, sam, if youhaven't heard.
Speaker 2 (57:13):
Sam Horn look her up.
Sam Horn Start following her.
Speaker 1 (57:15):
Cool.
She used to run the Maui BookPublishing Conference.
That's where first-time authorscould come to Maui.
I mean that would be a greattrip and actually get to sit in
front of all of the majorpublishing houses.
Speaker 3 (57:30):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (57:30):
And so for 20 years she did that she would stand at
the back of the room and sothese people would have 10
minutes to do a pitch.
And she said so sad andpathetic.
She could tell in the first 60seconds like if you're 3.30 or 4
o'clock in the afternoon andit's every 10 minutes there's a
pitch these people are.
Speaker 3 (57:47):
You know, you're exhausted, you're pitched out
but she would say this must beher wearing the hat on LinkedIn.
Speaker 2 (57:53):
Okay, I'm going to send her a connect request and
we're going to see if shelistens to the episode, because
she'll connect.
If she listened, there we goSent.
All right, we'll see what's up.
Speaker 1 (58:00):
Okay, she is amazing.
I spent a whole weekend there.
Speaker 2 (58:08):
I've been following her for a while she lives about
10 minutes from Dr Ivan Me.
Speaker 1 (58:13):
She said I could tell .
So she started another company,the Intrigue Agency, and what
she has gone on to do is teachpeople how to perfect a pitch
that gets people to raise theireyebrows Like if you were to
squint, squint right, Inaturally squint.
Speaker 2 (58:30):
Yeah, you do.
But squinting means you knowyou do, but squinting means you
know you're not getting it ifyou say something and ask a
question yeah right.
Speaker 1 (58:40):
She says if somebody asks what you do, don't tell
them.
Right right so would you afriend or a business
professional?
She says if somebody asks whatyou do, don't tell them ask a
three-part question Would you, afriend or business associate,
need to network but are allergicto it?
That's what I do.
(59:00):
I teach people how to getcomfortable and actually enjoy
networking.
Okay, right, okay, that raises.
Usually if you can get somebodyto raise their eyebrows, that
means somebody's listening.
Speaker 2 (59:14):
Fair enough 100% yeah .
Speaker 3 (59:16):
Well, thank you, we have to thank.
We've.
Actually we're here at theClayton Park Bar and Grill.
Yes so thank you to them forhosting and letting us record
here.
Darlene, thank you very muchfor coming on the show and
honestly thank you.
You've been a big supporter ofus.
You're constantly sharing stuffand liking stuff.
Speaker 2 (59:35):
Thank you for that.
Speaker 3 (59:36):
We do appreciate very much yeah and you even asked us
to speak at one of your events.
So, honestly, truly, trulythankful for your you know just,
you know support, you know thatthat kind of virtual and
non-virtual support, weappreciate it you have to know
I'm, I am going to form the fanclub and anybody like you two
(59:57):
who share positives, who shareand support people.
Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
I don't think there's any greater service that we can
do to mankind.
And you haven't seen the lastof me because, stay tuned, we're
going to be doing a big eventfor Small Business Week at the
library with these two.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
Yes, we're going to come back and hang out with you
again in October.
Speaker 3 (01:00:18):
I really look forward to that.
It'll be fun.
Cheers to you, delaney.
Thank you very much, that wasgreat.
Bye.
Cheers.
Speaker 2 (00:02):
Welcome to the Afternoon Point.
I'm Mike Tobin, I am MattConrad, and who are we?
Speaker 1 (00:05):
having with us today Darlene Kurnia Al.
I'm so glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:10):
Nice to meet you here .
Thank you so much for coming by.
So I guess, to the peoplelistening, who is Darlene.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
A girl from Glenmargaret, nova Scotia, on
the road to Peggy's Cove, theoldest of seven daughters.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Okay, okay, and you're the networking queen.
I am the networking queen,you're the networking queen,
absolutely.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
My name rhymes with queen.
There you go, my mother, whenwe were bad, as little kids used
to say I'd like to crown you soqueen of networking.
Delete, there you go.
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Okay, that's it.
But realistically, you've had alarge reach.
So I mean there are probably alot of people that are going to
listen to this, that are goingto know your name, know your
face, simply for lots ofdifferent reasons.
I mean, you were the executivedirector is what the title was
for BNI.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
Business Network International.
That's correct For Nova Scotia,new Brunswick and Prince Edward
Island.
Speaker 3 (01:04):
Yeah, so that would have reached probably thousands
of people alone, right?
Speaker 1 (01:09):
BNI's in 80 countries .
330,000 members that pass abetter quality referral.
That generated last year about$26 billion US in new business
for BNI members.
Speaker 3 (01:20):
Right, wow, and then you also have your own, like
other business of networking,naturally.
Speaker 1 (01:27):
Exactly.
If you think back to being kidsin school, did they ever teach
us how to make a friend Right?
Cbc just did a program thatadults are having a hard time
making friends.
So to actually learn how tonetwork and enjoy it is what
usually is not comfortable formost people, but you know.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
Do you think COVID set people back a little bit
Like about?
You know, just the naturalnetworking of things and being
social or whatever?
Speaker 1 (01:51):
Well, I certainly think that, because of COVID, we
learned how to use other tools,which weren't bad.
Speaker 3 (01:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:57):
But it left us craving for human connection in
a much bigger way.
That's why what you folks aredoing, people love listening to
it.
Because that's what we want.
We want to make thoseconnections.
We want something deeper thanjust a handshake.
It's like a relationship, andmost people don't realize that I
have a podcast Network EqualsNet Worth.
(02:19):
And it is not about money, itis the relationships, if you
think about it, because you twolikely have pretty phenomenal
networks.
okay, it is those of us that hadthat support system that got
through COVID right, I mean Ireached out to people that would
likely have never given me thetime of day during COVID and
(02:39):
they wanted to talk.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Seriously, yeah, yeah to talk.
Speaker 1 (02:43):
And then, now that you know the world is opening up
, I think that for many peoplethey're out of the habit and
it's like anything else Ifyou're out of the habit, it's a
little harder to get back intothe habit.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
It's interesting what you say there, because where a
lot of people probably mostpeople really probably took the
time to kind of recoil and, youknow, go ah, the world's closing
down, so let's just close downand whatever, you actually saw
it as an opportunity to takeadvantage of.
Like no one's doing this, sowhy don't I just be the one to
do it?
Well, I don't think I was theonly one, but still you were one
(03:17):
of the people that did where,like 90% of the people were not
Exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:21):
Yeah, so I'm the queen of little things.
That's how I built any businessthat I've ever had.
And so a person a long time agobuilt a million-dollar business
before COVID, but sitting onhis butt back home reaching out
to people on social mediabecause he really wasn't a
person that enjoyed networking.
And so he said to me, Dillian,just make one new connection a
(03:42):
day.
And so I've done that over theyears and literally I do it
every day.
One new connection I'm lookingfor.
When was the last time youupdated your profiles?
I'm looking for a humanconnection.
A lot of people on their socialmedia, you know they share
things but they don't reallyshare who they are.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
Right.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
And when you can find a human connection, I believe
business will happen organically.
So human connection.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
I believe business will happen organically.
So how do you?
How?
It's a twofold question, Iguess, but like how do you reach
out to people, how do you makea connection every day and how
do you make sure it's authentic?
Speaker 1 (04:11):
Okay.
Well, first of all, if theydon't have a picture, are they
posting?
You know, if they.
I'm amazed at how many peoplehave a profile and don't bother
doing it, don't do anything withit.
But those that are out thereliking, sharing, commenting,
don't just do the like button.
People fall in love with thelike button.
(04:33):
If you really admire somebody,like, share, comment, say at
least five words, because you'renow in the algorithms.
And people are going to startnoticing you, but what?
I like to do is go in andcompliment somebody, because
most of us, especially whenyou're self-employed, somebody's
not patting you on the back.
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Yeah, and we've said this a couple times on our show,
where we've said people don'tquite realize that liking,
sharing, commenting is digitalcurrency that is free to give to
business people and all that.
Like you know, a like, a shareand a comment on this, say, when
this post goes up on socials,it costs someone maybe five
(05:14):
seconds of their life and helpsreach a bunch of other people,
right, so it's a great thing.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Well, and your wonderful podcast on human
trafficking I have liked sharedevery time I see that going
around.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
I noticed that Because exactly.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
You've nailed it.
Okay, people will like it, andyou want to go winking in the
dark?
Okay, like.
Share comment.
And if you're going to commentfive words or more, but do it in
the way of a question.
Hey what do you think of this?
Isn't this terrific?
What do you think?
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Right.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
Hey, what do you think of this?
Isn't this terrific?
What do you think?
And that not only keeps it backin the algorithms, which
supports the person who took thetrouble to make that, but
you're now in the algorithms.
Okay, I'll give you an example,because we closed on B&I and
Donna Major-Smith, who's the newexecutive director of B&I,
merit types, who's going to doan amazing job.
I posted before I passed on toher, that we're up to 10,000.
(06:08):
And that was a week ago, monday, and people are constantly.
Speaker 3 (06:12):
Those 10,000 members?
Is that what you said?
Speaker 1 (06:14):
10,000 people that have commented.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
Oh commented, oh wow, well not 10,000, but because
there's enough people commentingon it exactly, it keeps going
and going and going.
Gotcha Okay.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
And so this is where I go in, and anybody that did
that, I do say thank you.
Speaker 3 (06:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (06:32):
You know that's the extra step that makes all the
difference in the world.
Speaker 2 (06:35):
A hundred percent it does.
I appreciate thank you so much.
Yeah, exactly yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:38):
Yeah.
So let's rewind a little bit,because we will come back to
explore that, but let's rewind alittle bit and let's go back to
so we'll go back, like wherewere you at 20 or 40 years ago?
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Like how did this all start?
Speaker 1 (06:52):
Well, my parents my dad was an officer in the Navy.
My mom stay at home.
Mom, nine children.
She could have been a brainsurgeon and she would have had
three nannies in order to keepup, but she was very resourceful
.
We had a beautiful Cape Codhouse set back off the road and
there was a barn at the end ofour very long driveway.
And that was my mother's sanity.
(07:13):
She opened a handcraft shopcalled the Killick, which is a
wooden anchor very familiar herein Atlantic Canada, and we
would be read the riot act thatwhen a person would pull in the
driveway, my mother would runout to the barn to wait on them.
And she would say when she leftthe house if any of you come
out before that car leaves thedriveway, you do not get a treat
(07:34):
.
And so you know, as the carsmake it to the end of the
driveway, we're all runningright.
I'm the oldest of seven, so themantra I grew up with set an
example.
You have six younger sisters.
So as we all got older, we wereencouraged to make things and we
would take turns working in theshop and my mom gave us a
(07:55):
little percentage of what shesold, and so she was very
resourceful.
Also, she would only sellhandmade crafts.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
So she really instilled like that
entrepreneurship in you early.
Speaker 1 (08:05):
Well, here's the interesting part my dad go to
school, get a good educationhandmade crafts.
So she really instilled thatentrepreneurship in you early,
eh.
Well, here's the interestingpart my dad go to school, get a
good education and work for thegovernment.
My mother she wanted her sevendaughters.
The mantra I grew up with mydad was I'm not paying for your
weddings.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Right.
Speaker 1 (08:20):
Just so you understand really early on.
Speaker 2 (08:23):
I'm not paying for your weddings, my mother wanted
her daughters to not bedependent on a man.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
And I have two older brothers as well, but we really
should have aspired to more.
Now, luckily, I grew up with amentality that was not money
doesn't grow on trees or thingslike that.
You know, we may not be rich,but, we're honest, we did not
hear that it was a matter of ifyou wanted extra money, we got a
(08:48):
weekly allowance.
That was the only good partabout getting older.
Your allowance got bigger.
But other than the allowance, alist on the inside of a
cupboard door that if you wantedmore money, right, that that's
what you needed to do.
Now imagine that many people.
Luckily, we had a really nicebig house.
We had a couple of bathroomsback in the day when most people
(09:09):
only had one.
And it was you want to makeextra money?
Clean the bathroom.
It's where you made the most.
Ah oh.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
So there was value, okay, so you saw your mother in
the driveway, so she's obviouslyan avid networker.
People coming and going right.
Speaker 1 (09:24):
And met people all over the world.
She was brilliant in thataspect and she used to say only
do this to get back-to-schoolclothes in Christmas, Right?
So at the time, fishermen knitsweaters.
They're still very popular.
We were always looking forsomething else we could do, so
my job that I took on wasknitting.
Fishermen knit sweaters and, ifyou can believe it, in one
(09:45):
summer I likely knit more than40.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Wow, oh wow.
Speaker 1 (09:48):
And my mom kept letters of all these people that
were so thankful that I madethem beautiful sweaters.
Speaker 3 (09:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (09:55):
It was a million years ago, guys.
I sold them for $30 a pop.
Speaker 3 (09:59):
I was making big money Back then, it would have
been yeah, good money.
How old were you then, do youthink?
Speaker 1 (10:04):
Oh, I was likely 12 or 13 at the time.
Speaker 3 (10:06):
Oh my gosh.
Okay, so $30 a pop is good cashYou're darn right Plus.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
I could babysit and have a dual source of income
because I could babysit and knitsweaters At the same time.
And knit sweaters.
But I think the most wonderfulmemory was he had to have been
about 6'4".
I had to stand on a ladder tomeasure him.
He was the conductor of the NewYork Philharmonic.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Orchestra.
Speaker 1 (10:32):
I have never seen arms that big.
I mean the guy was massive andI could vision him performing.
And he said can you make thesleeves long enough that you
could roll back the cuffs?
And you know why he wanted todo that?
Because there was nothing heever bought that could roll back
the cuffs and could you make itextra long.
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
He was just amazing.
Speaker 2 (10:55):
Now, were you different from your other
siblings in the fact that youhad this entrepreneurism spirit,
or were all your siblings likethat, or how did that work?
Speaker 1 (11:03):
All were pretty crafty so we all made something,
but I would say likely I wasthe most committed, because
being able to have that extrasource of income to pay for the
things that you wanted to so yes, but we were all pretty
resourceful and fortunately havedone pretty well in life.
(11:23):
But what's really kind of neatis, as you see, the next
generation, them sort of takingon the spirit.
I have a nephew.
He's a civil engineer and he'ssoon going to retire his
military and so he's taken up awoodcrafting business.
And he's called it the Killick,and he just creates beautiful
(11:44):
works of art.
My mom did pen and ink sketcheswhich she sold in the shop, and
one of my sisters just startedto do beautiful watercolors.
So I know, my mom is very happy.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
Where did you go grow up again, glen Margaret, glen
Margaret, on the road to Peggy'sCove.
On the road to Peggy's Cove,yes, wow.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
And we would have all likely, at one time or another,
worked at Peggy's Cove, becausethat was where you made the big
bucks in the summer.
Speaker 2 (12:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (12:08):
Yeah, yeah, that's the truth.
Yeah, I mean even bigger now,obviously, all the stuff that's
grown there.
So, yeah, really good.
So that's awesome.
But you know as you, as you gotolder and you became an adult,
what was like, what was thefirst job you jumped into?
Speaker 1 (12:31):
Well, I studied retail merchandising after high
school.
I had spent part of my youthgrowing up in Ottawa, so I
skipped a grade.
So I actually finished highschool at 16.
Okay, and so I took a two-yearretail merchandising course.
My first job was as Sears atthe management training program.
But my hubby took a job withthe Coast Guard, so we moved to
(12:52):
Sydney.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
You said hubby, so when did you meet your hubby?
How young.
Speaker 1 (12:56):
I met him when I was 17 and I married him when I was
18.
Speaker 3 (12:59):
Oh wow, oh my gosh, oh wow.
So you've been together a longtime.
That's good so at 13,.
Speaker 2 (13:03):
You started your own business.
You were married at 17?
Speaker 1 (13:06):
18.
Speaker 3 (13:07):
18, sorry, you got life done early, you have to
remember.
Speaker 1 (13:11):
I had six younger sisters.
Speaker 2 (13:13):
Yeah no, that's true.
Speaker 1 (13:20):
Well, and watch he's about eight years older which
means we're about the same level.
You know what I mean.
So the Coast Guard College inSydney was not necessarily my
favorite place to live, but thenhe took a job in.
Ottawa to eventually work at aplace called Transport Canada
Training Institute.
So I got to work at thenewsstand.
I ran that at the ShadowLaurier Hotel and let me tell
(13:43):
you that was an experience initself.
That was open 365 days of theyear, from 6 in the morning
until about midnight.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (13:52):
Okay, so all the politicians at that time would
have stayed at the Chateau,Laurier.
You know they got a reallygreat rate, and so royalty Queen
Elizabeth waved to me.
Speaker 2 (14:04):
Whoa.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
Donald Sutherland, margaret Trudeau, I mean you
name it.
Anybody that was on the Hillreally was in there.
The part that I laughed themost, or one of the things that
was kind of funny I was officialsupplier of tobacco and news to
the governor general and theprime minister.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
Oh, no way.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
And every morning two RCMP officers would come in to
get the prime minister'snewspapers and I used to laugh
and go because I'm in there,because if not one of my staff
and you have to stuff thenewspapers.
Speaker 3 (14:35):
Who was the prime minister at that?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
time.
Oh, that was a long time ago,Pierre Trudeau.
Oh, so it was just as he wasgoing out, but I used to laugh
and go wonder how much it coststo have two RCMP officers
deliver his newspapers.
That's really interesting guys.
And they would just say justgive us a papers to leave.
And I'd say wow bodyguards isnot great, but anyway, yeah,
(15:00):
lots of celebrities, it washilarious.
Lots of celebrities, it washilarious.
The other part that was so neatwas equal opportunity, employer
before Pride and things likethat came into being.
My whole staff was gay and wehad the best time.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (15:14):
Yeah, so I've been an ally for the queer community
forever.
Speaker 3 (15:18):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
But we had you know, it was just a really fun place.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
You never know who was going to walk through the
door.
Would you say that was like.
I mean, obviously you had earlyon, with your mother being the
entrepreneur and the amount ofpeople that would stop through.
Would you say that that reallykind of put the power of
networking into hyperdrive,because that would seem like a
huge opportunity to really kindof?
Speaker 1 (15:40):
Well, to be willing to talk to people.
But, here's the interestingpart we had glass cases in the
handcraft shop.
As long as I stood behind thatcounter I was confident he took
me outside of that.
Speaker 2 (15:55):
You melted, yeah right.
Speaker 1 (15:58):
You know it's one thing that if somebody's been an
employee for a long time andthen you become a person who is
now self-employed, the wholeidea of you selling yourself
sometimes stops people.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
That yeah, so did you have any mentors like out there
now, like you?
So you're out there in thispart of the world you're now.
What was the trajectory thatgot you to this start, when you
became an avid networker?
Speaker 1 (16:20):
during retail merchandising when I took that
program the woman who was one ofthe instructors had gone to a
very famous school in bostonmerchandising, so yeah, I sort
of figured she really gave us ahead start.
Sears management program.
There was a person there, but Iwasn't there that long because
we moved sydney.
I worked for a businessman.
(16:41):
He was a character Well, in hisfavorite line.
If you could only learn tothink like a mandolin, you'd be
perfect.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
Oh my gosh, yeah, the things that that won't work
today.
Yeah, yeah, Well, it stillhappens likely.
Speaker 1 (16:56):
But then the United Cigar Store had a management
trading program as well, andthat would have been likely one
of their top places in canada.
I mean, we had a cigar humidorsecond to none.
Um, and again I got invited tothe governor general's garden
party, the pm garden the holidaythings right you know, so you
kind of go.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
I wasn't very old at the time, but you kind of go,
wow yeah, but you get yourselfin all the right rooms yeah, you
know from a networkingperspective, and then other
people are probably interestedand they want to see you right
or talk to you.
Speaker 1 (17:28):
How many politicians we would get to talk to on a
daily basis.
Oh, you're from Nova Scotia.
You know, this is my writingand I remember at the time
thinking it's a writing.
But anyway, you know I'm notpolitical.
Speaker 3 (17:38):
It's interesting because it kind of brings me
back and we can talk about thislater.
But Mike and I recently did aguest speaking event at one of
your events and I remembersaying at that event to people
who were asking some questions,making sure that you're always,
you know, get yourself into theright rooms, the rooms where
there's important people thatyou can network with, and things
like that, and that's what youdid.
Speaker 1 (17:59):
You got yourself in the right room.
Well, and because I was behindthe counter, I was confident
right.
That running.
You know, as the manager.
I want to speak to the manager.
You come in and you know again.
I don't care whether you're thedeputy prime minister.
You know what can I do for you?
Speaker 3 (18:16):
Right.
Speaker 1 (18:17):
Yeah, so I think it was a bit of.
I was very naive at the timebut certainly had what some used
to say is chutzpah.
Speaker 3 (18:26):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Yeah, that I was used to talking to people in my
comfort zone.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Right.
So how do you transition thework that you were doing and all
of a sudden come to BNI?
It's like how did BNI happen.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
There was a big business in between there.
Speaker 3 (18:41):
Oh, okay, let's go to the big business.
Yeah, let's go to the bigbusiness.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
First, I would love to tell you about my second job
after.
I started to work for a textilecompany to make things, and so
I was manager of a big store onSpark Street in Ottawa, but very
quickly they offered me a jobas a buyer for their head office
in Montreal.
Excuse me, I did that and sothis company.
(19:08):
It was interesting At that timethe textile business were a lot
of people from concentrationcamps a lot of.
Austrian, hungarian, you know abig Jewish population, and so I
learned some things that youknow touched my heart.
These people, many of themstill, were very positive about
(19:29):
life, but a lot of them werevery angry and I don't blame
them, but it was a very kind ofclosed.
If you weren't part of theJewish community, you weren't
really in.
So, the two fellows that Iworked with were known as the
biggest crooks in the business.
Speaker 2 (19:45):
No way.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
No way, like no way.
So twice a year we got to go toEurope.
Myself and another woman werebuyers.
My department was wool andcotton she had.
She's not part of the Jewishcommunity, but she'd been a
refugee from the war.
Speaker 3 (20:02):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
And so her office.
I had to walk by her officeevery day.
She didn't have somebody cryingby nine o'clock in the morning.
She wasn't happy, yeah, and so,very quickly, every day you
walk by, that you go.
Speaker 3 (20:17):
I don't want to do this.
Speaker 1 (20:19):
I love the job that was the sad part and so um.
A supplier one day said to meyou know, you're just like
gertrude and I could never playpoker.
It was like somebody slapped meacross the face.
He said delete.
I mean it as a compliment.
It was like oh, I'm out of here,yeah, you know, one of our
trips to europe, we would make athing through austria,
(20:40):
switzerland.
I mean the fabrics andeverything.
So to understand the business,the designers of fabric, much
like clothing designers, highcouture as long as you have one
repeat of the pattern, they canmake a replica.
So this year it might be soldto you know, chanel and whatever
(21:01):
okay, so they change like handsof like designers?
Oh yeah, you would buy thedesign of the fabric you had
created.
So two or three years from nowyou would see it in cheaper
fabrics by other designers.
Speaker 3 (21:17):
Okay, okay, yeah.
Speaker 1 (21:18):
So we would go to all of these textile mills because
usually they would have stuffthat you know was on, special
things that they wouldn't taketo the show.
We would end up with a reallybig textile show in frankfurt,
and so the very first time Iwent there I was like I was
excited, got to see somethingcalled the international color
council, and so they would kindof I mean, I was a babe in the
(21:44):
woods.
Okay, delene, we've got acouple guys who are going to go
with you.
You go in there, so pictureracks and racks of these samples
, put everything you like in thefront of a rack and then leave
quickly.
And the two big guys had bigsample cases and they would go
in and steal them.
No way, oh, my second trip.
(22:06):
I just, you know, I wasphysically sick because you
thought I can't do this anymoreyeah, crazy so, but thank god, I
mean, I got to work withcanadian designers.
Speaker 2 (22:18):
I learned about facelifts there'd be rolls
rosses parked out of our saintcatherine street location, where
all of the beautiful fabrics.
And.
Speaker 1 (22:26):
I'll never forget this woman putting her hand out.
She came in with Simon Chang, abig Canadian designer, and her
face was amazing, but her handwas that of a 90-year-old and
you know, again, it was kind oflike a little bit of an
electrical shock, because you'rethinking, oh, if I ever have a
facelift, I'm going to have ahead.
The things that you do.
Speaker 2 (22:47):
Oh my gosh, yeah, yeah, yeah, oh, yeah, like yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:51):
Or somebody coming in , and because in the Jewish
community you usually have to beburied and don't cope with this
like within 24 hours.
So, somebody coming in and sayI need a pattern.
With this color fabric in it,can you make me a dress in a day
?
And you think okay, jewishfuneral.
You might want to edit all thatout.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
No, no, that's fine.
Speaker 3 (23:09):
No, that's fine.
Yeah, I know they sit Shiva forseven days and stuff like that.
Speaker 2 (23:14):
That's probably after the burial yeah, yeah.
So what happened to these guys,though that were stealing the
stuff, Did they?
Speaker 1 (23:20):
get busted.
Well, if they caught them.
Speaker 2 (23:21):
They never got caught .
Speaker 1 (23:22):
Well, they were big yeah.
They had big sample cases andyou know, I mean, after a while
it was kind of like you knowthey were, they, the people that
they knew, were usuallystanding outside the door.
So if they got a look at themthey'd go you with them and then
they'd go.
Okay, delene, still pick it up,and I'm thinking I don't want
to pick it up, I just want to gohome.
Speaker 3 (23:44):
Anyway, yeah, great story, not exactly buyer, trips,
well yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:57):
And then Joe took a job back and we wanted to come
home and Montreal.
It was the end of it.
But the FLQ and billboards-blowing up?
Speaker 3 (24:05):
Oh right, yes, of course.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
I don't speak French, we just, you know it was more.
We wanted to go home.
My father-in-law had been topsales in Canada for National
Cash Register for many years,even though he just had Halifax
North.
You know all the way to CapeBreton, and he said when I met
(24:27):
Joe, he said you know, I'vealways told Joe he needs to have
a business.
He'll never have a business,but you will Delane.
So when we moved back fromMontreal we started to look
because we knew we were cominghome, and we looked into a
couple of franchises we couldhave had.
Maybe a McDonald's inCornerbrook or Port Hawks.
I had a friend that had a TimHorton.
She said you do not want to bea day-old donut.
And the big thing aboutfranchises they didn't have
(24:49):
Baskin-Robbins.
When we lived in Ottawa welived next door to a.
Baskin-Robbins, my husband wouldhave eaten all the profit, like
all the profit.
Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah, that's fair.
Speaker 1 (24:58):
So, because I had experience in tourism, we looked
into purchasing a smallconvenience store that had quite
a big property and we thoughtwe could turn that into
something.
We actually put an offering onit, my husband's like please
don't buy it.
Please don't buy it, because wehad a sailboat and he loved to
fly fish for salmon.
And he said you want to openthat business, don't expect any
(25:20):
help from me.
And the more I thought about itbecause when you work in
tourism, you expect any helpfrom me.
And the more I thought about itbecause when you work in
tourism, you're giving up thebest part of what you're doing
here.
And so a friend of mine who hada very successful retail job in
Toronto, mary Kay, had just cometo Canada, been here about not
even three years, and she said,delene, I gave up my job and I'm
(25:42):
driving a pink Cadillac and Iremember thinking I didn't have
a license.
That'd be a Cadillac, nice,lawn over it.
So she said, why don't you giveit a try?
And honest to God, I think, Joe, my husband said, just give it
a year.
Anything would have been betterthan owning that tourism
business.
(26:03):
And sure enough, within theyear I was making six figures
and drove a pink Cadillac.
I did not have a driver'slicense, but they delivered it
anyway.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
So you had a pink Cadillac, just couldn't drive it
, yeah.
Speaker 2 (26:17):
Unbelievable.
Speaker 3 (26:18):
Yeah, that's, I don't know not wrong with that.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
So what was this?
So when was this Mary Kay thingIn?
The early 80s, early 80s, sowas this like when it was first
popping off, because this hasbeen around for decades now.
Well, I think 65 years now.
Speaker 1 (26:33):
But it had only just come to Canada.
Mary Kay was first in theUnited States, second Australia,
then third franchise was Canada.
So I knew nothing about skincare, color cosmetics.
But they said they trained meand I was willing to learn, and
because I didn't drive a car, Itook the bus or rode it on my
bicycle.
I was thinner then too, andMary Kay trains you right.
(26:57):
And luckily Mary Kay Ash, thefounder of the company, was
still active enough that I wasmentored by her personally.
And her very best friend isDaylene White.
Except in Dallas they call herDay-lane.
And so, mary Kay, it was thefirst time I'd ever seen the
same spelling of my name, havethey?
Speaker 2 (27:16):
ever made a movie about Mary Kay?
They have.
They have, yeah, because that'san extraordinary story.
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (27:22):
Oh, she listen to be in that woman's presence.
Yeah, she was a powerhouse.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Is Mary Kay still a big thing?
Oh, mary Kay, yeah, number ninedirect sales globally, I think.
So it's still this people arestill doing because there's so
many things like that, now,right, come and go.
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Yeah, exactly if it's a real opportunity.
It'll hang around yeah, and sothey've been able to adjust as
they go into markets.
Asia's a very big one, southamer America 33 countries.
I had five global markets thatI worked in.
But Mary Kay's best friend hername was Delene White, spelled
(28:01):
the same way as me, and so Iknew Mary Kay well enough that
she said you're my Canadiandaily.
My mother hated it that theydidn't say my name the same way
she thought it would.
So, yeah, the woman was justincredible.
She really had a presence, andwhen you do really well in life,
they take you through kitchens,they take the celebrities.
(28:23):
You don't see the pretty partsof the hotel.
They take you the back way, andso I've been in a lot of
kitchens with Mary Kay Ash overthe years in a lot of different
places.
I've been to her lot ofkitchens with Mary Kay Ash over
the years in a lot of differentplaces.
Been to her home.
I remember she moved into a bighouse the pink house, she
called it and got invited to ahousewarming party with her.
Yeah, she really was amazing.
(28:43):
So that was just as theInternet was really starting to
happen.
So I would have built thatbusiness because once I left
that job and had to hand out abusiness card to somebody, it
was like I'd rather go in thebathroom and throw up.
So I learned very quickly howto make sure I would get
(29:03):
referrals.
And when you build therelationship, business happens
organically.
But people there are somepeople who are just natural
connectors and when you can findthose people, treat them like
gold.
So every year about 20 peoplewere likely could provide 30 to
(29:25):
40% of my new business everyyear.
So when people are doing that,that's huge, oh yeah, but what
they would refer to as socialcapital today is when you're
providing value to people.
Three things I said to peopleat every interaction.
Thank you so much for yourbusiness.
I sure hope you know how much Iappreciate you.
Second, the greatest complimentyou can pay me is referrals.
Speaker 3 (29:49):
Yep Right.
Speaker 1 (29:49):
Uh-oh, I didn't know that.
If you don't say that to people, they don't necessarily know.
Third, if ever I can help youpersonally or professionally,
please reach out.
I know a lot of people that Itrust.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:01):
And so I'd sold that business.
That's coming up to 10 years,the end of this year, 2025.
About three years ago, a womancalled me and she said, Delene,
I was going to press Google.
Then she said I'm going to tryyour phone number.
Seven years she remembered myphone number.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
Oh no way.
Speaker 1 (30:17):
Okay, she called me.
I knew her mom, I knew her, Iknew her kids.
And she said first we had anice catch up.
And she said at the end I wasgoing to press Google, but I
need three things.
Sure enough, I could make threeintroductions.
Why press Google, google, but Ineed three things.
Sure enough I could make threeintroductions.
Why press Google, call D'Lien?
Most people are not willing tobuild the relationship, to take
(30:38):
that investment of time.
See what you folks are building20 years from now, people are
going to love it as much, if notmore.
Speaker 3 (30:46):
No, thank you.
Thank you, I hope so.
Speaker 2 (30:49):
But I mean to you, though, to have this insight, to
see BNI, and I mean I've seenyou in action.
I've seen you in action invarious roles, like through my
professional life.
So I can go back 10 years whenI was working for another
company and I met you.
And I met you 10 years later,working for a different company,
and I mean, what's consistentis there's a few things that you
(31:10):
have.
So one of them is authenticity.
Right, you're a delightfulperson to talk to.
So, even though I probablygenuinely I'm not one that likes
to get out of my own skin a lotso there's people probably
listening to this and saying I'mnot a great networker Well,
you're hearing one right now.
Like, I don't really love goingout and interacting a whole lot
(31:32):
, but someone like you reallygets me out and gets me talking
and gets me chatting, gets mecomfortable.
Right, you're a real enablerfor conversation, which I think
is just which I think is whatvalue you provide.
You're really great at that,and I think that's like what led
you to this B&I moment, whereyou found this company, and just
(31:53):
let us know how you got thereto be an eye well, when I first
started my mary k business I wasa bni member, yeah okay and um,
it was interesting, it was alot of older gentlemen yep
Speaker 1 (32:04):
there weren't many women in in the group, but let
me tell you, I learned alifetime of business skills
within, let's say, a couple ofshort years.
So it was like a mastermindgroup business brains, you name
it and that's really what BNI isall about.
And so, going in there as afairly new person, my business
(32:25):
was gaining momentum.
But you know, when you reachthat imposter syndrome, holy
crap, what am I going to do next?
And that's where they reallyhelped me, right, okay, so that
excuse me that within about twoyears my business had quadrupled
, and I relate that to what B&Iwas all about.
And if the old guys hadn't kepthitting on me, I likely would
(32:49):
have stayed a B&I member a lotlonger yeah yeah.
I mean, when you drive a pinkCadillac, people say some pretty
wild things.
Speaker 3 (32:56):
Oh, that's, probably true.
Oh, yeah, well.
Speaker 1 (32:58):
I remember going on a Newfoundland ferry once.
We were the last car on.
What's next to me is an18-wheeler full of live chickens
and for whatever reason, Ithought last one on, I'll be the
first one off.
And we get up there and we'regoing up the stairs of the
elevator to where we're going onthe Newfoundland Ferry and all
these guys are going what roomare you in?
(33:19):
Because you didn't get thatpink Cadillac for selling makeup
and you kind of go.
I am now going to lock myselfin a room somewhere, right?
Speaker 3 (33:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
But when we got up the next morning, joke was on us
, my friend and I.
We go down and oh, the smell ofchicken poop was just awful and
my car on the left-hand side,big white big pink.
Cadillac white leather top,white leather interior, chicken
shit and feathers.
And there is not at that time,not a car wash till Stephenville
(33:51):
Right and people wouldjustville.
Yeah, right, and people wouldjust point and laugh, right, I
looked like Angora on theleft-hand side.
Speaker 3 (34:00):
My gosh.
Oh, so you were a member of BNI, so when did you take over BNI
and become supreme leader?
Speaker 1 (34:12):
Well based on the business that I built with Mary
Kay Cosmetics in amorphine-induced passing, a
kidney stone.
When they tell you not to makeany major decisions, I happen to
say to my husband it's the besttime to make a decision.
Speaker 2 (34:24):
People tell you not to.
Speaker 1 (34:25):
They tell you not to sign any papers.
I said you know what I shouldretire and Joe just took his
finger and said you said it andbecause I had a big enough
business, barry Kay's stillpaying me right.
He said, okay, well, let's trysomething new.
And he said, yeah, so I fooledaround at a couple of things.
But then somebody had broughtBNI back here.
It hadn't been here for about adozen years and I said I think
(34:48):
I'd like to try that, and myhusband on board and we've had a
great time doing it.
Just amazing people.
Bni has seven core values, butthe number one is giver's gain
and for anybody who goes to anetworking event most people if
you're flight or freeze, you'renormal, if you feel
(35:09):
uncomfortable walking into aroom that's not a person's
comfort zone.
It was not mine in the beginningbeginning, but I learned how to
do things better.
That again I love to see how ithas helped people.
We've only had the franchise,has only been back here about
six years and we've alreadyclosed three or four million
dollars in new business amongbni members so how do you
(35:30):
calculate that new business?
Speaker 2 (35:31):
Do you just say from the referral programs?
Speaker 1 (35:33):
you kind of score what the?
Speaker 2 (35:34):
value of them are.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Well, or if I give you a referral you're the only
one who knows what's in thatreferral.
It's all anonymous right.
If it turns into business youwould thank me to a dollar
amount.
But it's all anonymous who itcame from.
So odds are if you gave me areferral and I would say okay,
mike, thank you very much forthe referral.
(35:57):
Here's the status of what it is, because you want to know if
it's a good referral and whenthat number shows up you know
sometimes it's a lot of money.
So it worked out.
Yes, thank you very much.
Speaker 3 (36:09):
Perfect, cool.
How many groups are set upacross the Maritimes?
Speaker 1 (36:15):
There's never been anything in Newfoundland, never
been anything in PEI.
We have a couple started in NewBrunswick and we have a bunch
here in Nova Scotia working on.
The new owner is the SouthShore, the Valley, cape Breton,
truro.
Yeah, okay, there's only thinkof a group of 20 or more
business professionals.
(36:35):
Only one seat per profession.
Yeah, so there's only onerealtor, only one mortgage
broker.
Speaker 3 (36:42):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
It cuts out the competition.
Speaker 3 (36:44):
You can speak freely.
That way too right.
Like you know, if you're comingto this group with your
struggles or you know some ofyour wins and the things that
you're doing to win, you don'texactly insurance business.
You understand what it takes tobuy or sell a house or that, a
mortgage, your interest rate isnot the only thing.
Speaker 1 (37:18):
Okay, that you learn so much more about so many more
people, which, again, when thatclient is looking for help and
you could say, look, if you everneed something, reach out and
you can actually make anintroduction to them.
And because it's somebody thatyou see, bni is a commitment of
time and money.
You meet weekly and you pay amembership fee.
(37:39):
You don't pay any commissions,but the fact that if that person
you know like and trust thatclient that's now meeting with
them because there's a level oftrust, the sales funnel fills
and closes faster.
Speaker 3 (37:53):
How do you because, just given the fact that you're
such a center like central pointfor a lot of people, how do you
manage referring business topeople when, say, you know so
many people in business the sameindustry?
Speaker 1 (38:11):
well, I'm so glad you mentioned that, um that you
either try to pass it along ormatchmake.
What's it?
What's this person right?
Speaker 2 (38:22):
you know, let's say realtor.
Speaker 1 (38:23):
There's some people who love to do first-time home
buyers so if this isn't somebodywho's ever bought a house,
who's the person that wouldlikely match the personality as
well right.
Speaker 2 (38:33):
so you play a little bit of matchmaking A little bit.
Speaker 3 (38:36):
I have a rule of two.
It's like the Sith, If you'reanything like Star Wars.
I have the rule of two.
I always try to have two peopleand then again it's matchmaking
, but I just try not to havelike 10 people, I just have like
two people.
So it's like two lawyers, tworeal estate agents, two
accountants to mortgage brokers,whatever.
Speaker 1 (38:52):
So here's the thing that I would say back to you now
yeah.
Are they sending referrals toyou?
Speaker 3 (38:58):
Yeah, that's an important part to it.
That's true If it's reciprocal.
Speaker 1 (39:02):
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (39:03):
That needs to also be that way too.
Speaker 1 (39:05):
And that speaks back to there.
Are some people who are justnatural connectors Not that
other people can't be, but youat least have to let them know
that you appreciate theirsupport.
I see so many times people withvery close connections, like
you know.
If you've got siblings, haveyou really looked at who their
(39:27):
connections are?
Do they really know how theycan help you?
They don't mean to piss you off.
Speaker 3 (39:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (39:34):
But if you have not made it clear that, yes, I would
appreciate this from you, youknow.
Speaker 2 (39:42):
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What do you think about peoplethat just seem unattracted by
that whole concept?
And I'm just throwing that outthere just to ask you, Because
I'm sure some people probablyjust heard what you just said
and said I don't want to bedoing that, I don out there just
to ask you, like, because I'msure some people probably just
heard what you just said andsaid I don't want to be doing
that.
Speaker 1 (39:59):
I don't want to be asking my brothers and my
sisters.
I didn't say ask, I said atleast inform, because here's the
thing.
Would you be pissed?
If they passed the businessthat could go to you to someone
else that's.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
That's a better way to look.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Yeah, yeah okay because I just find we miss our
warm connections a lot.
Yeah, sure, we do, and youdon't have to offer incentives.
You know, if it's somebody whocares about you, odds are they
would Right.
But if you never tell themright and that doesn't mean that
you know if you know them wellenough you could cut them up the
side of the head or something,or pour the beer on their head.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
No.
Speaker 3 (40:34):
Yeah, no, I mean yeah , that makes a lot of sense.
So now you've sold BNI, so youare.
Speaker 1 (40:42):
I'm going to be a BNI member forever.
Speaker 3 (40:45):
Yes, you said you're going to be a BNI member, but
now it's not your driving forcenecessarily anymore.
Speaker 1 (40:51):
That's why I opened Networking, naturally.
Yes, because what I have foundis here's a story.
I would drive by a group ofhigh school students waiting for
a bus.
It was usually 15 or 20 and Idrove by that bus stop a lot and
they're all doing this on theirphone yep they are likely
talking to each other on theirphone.
There is no eye contact.
(41:12):
There is no.
They don't know how to make aphone call.
They sleep with the damn things, but they don't really know how
to pick it up.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
and actually have a conversation, that's true.
Speaker 1 (41:20):
And then there's people.
Here's the other thing I findPeople get busy.
They stop networking, Okay.
Speaker 2 (41:27):
Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 1 (41:29):
You can, instead of calling it networking, which
automatically fear vomiting.
You know anxiety if you justsaid what if I made one new
connection a day?
then suddenly here's the otherpart a lot of conferences today,
a lot of networking events, andI usually try to do this with
any of mine that before you goto a networking event, see if
(41:51):
you can see the registrationlist, if you can see the
registration list, I just lookat the people, look at the name,
look at them on LinkedIn and gookay, they got a picture,
they're posting hey, I'm goingto this event, do you want to
meet there?
Speaker 3 (42:04):
Right, okay.
Speaker 1 (42:06):
Suddenly going to that event now isn't quite as
intimidating, and I might reachout to four, five, six.
I might not reach out to 20.
They're not all going to bethere, but reach out to enough
that you could have thatconversation with a few people,
and those that didn't were stillconnected.
Speaker 2 (42:21):
Right, so networking naturally.
So I don't want to miss thatwhat you just said, because I
have that on my list here totalk to you about.
So you started networkingnaturally and then you talked
about the younger folks on theirphones.
Yep, so did you create this foryounger people to have to like
kind of get some inroads intonetworking?
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Think about this for a minute.
Cbc did another program on.
By the time you're 28 years old, you'll know the bulk of people
.
You will know your whole life.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
Right.
Speaker 1 (42:50):
Now you and the three of us here.
You meet 50 people a weeklikely.
Speaker 2 (42:54):
Yeah, if not more.
Speaker 1 (42:55):
But if we went back to everybody in high school?
We kept in touch with as manyof them as possible, because 20
years from now, all thedifference in the world
Post-secondary education youcould be in a class with 200
people.
Are you connecting with them?
Okay?
So then, instead of goingnarrow, you're going wide.
And then, if you are in oneindustry, think of that industry
(43:17):
, even if you're an employee,who would that client see before
?
Who would that client see after?
Speaker 3 (43:22):
Right right.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Okay, so that you can be a complement to that.
So if let's say real estate, arealtor, a mortgage broker,
financial services person,insurance person, a realtor, a
mortgage broker, financialservices person, insurance
person, they all deal with aclientele in a complementary,
not competitive, way and justlike you said Matt a couple in
(43:44):
each of those.
So if each of them have 500, byonly making three connections
on LinkedIn to work with, you'renow up to 2,000 connections,
right, okay, you want tomultiply?
You picture one new connection aday five days a week, that's 20
a month.
Over the run of six months,that's 120.
(44:04):
If we do 80, 20, that could be24 new clients.
But if I say to people, go outand get 24 new clients, so it's
really how I built my business.
So I do small group coaching,but also in my years in Mary Kay
, once you're a top director,they didn't bring in outside
speakers.
The only way you ever got to bea trainer, a speaker, whatever
(44:29):
it was you had to prove yourselfwith the company.
Speaker 2 (44:31):
Credit back to you.
I mean sorry to interrupt, butlike the networking, naturally.
Now when we were there, Inoticed you know there's a lot
of folks, a lot of newcomers toour country.
Yep, you know a lot of peoplethat were just getting into the
job market.
You were helping these peopleout, you were giving them their
first kind of dose of anetworking event.
I think a lot of people mighthave only done this five or six
times before in their lives, ormaybe it was their first time.
Speaker 1 (44:52):
Well, and we have a lot of people.
I love the library eventsbecause they come back, because
they're interested, but, yeah,I'm a big believer in because
I've reached the point in lifewhere we are an aging population
, you know.
Number one what can I give back?
But number two if we're notmaking these people feel welcome
, they're not going to stay.
We're not in a good place okay,more important are we making
(45:16):
them feel because we're clicky?
okay, yeah are we making themfeel welcome enough?
Are we doing the extra littlebit?
I mean, think about this.
We spent a total of 23 years,my parents, on the road to
peggy's cove, small, first infrench village and then in Glen
Margaret.
They raised nine children there.
Only three of the nine were notborn in Nova Scotia.
(45:38):
The rest of us all were.
So what people locally wouldsay, right, oh, delene, you're
not from here, we'd go, I wasborn here.
Speaker 2 (45:48):
No, no, you're from away.
Speaker 1 (45:49):
Even though we were a big part of the community.
But that's kind of what we dealwith here.
The other thing I love aboutanybody that comes here, even if
it's from another province theysee the opportunities we're
missing.
Speaker 3 (46:01):
That's true, right.
Speaker 1 (46:03):
And that's what I love.
What you guys are doing isyou're capturing some of that.
Speaker 3 (46:07):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, try to get different people's
perspectives and just listen towhat they have to say.
Speaker 1 (46:12):
Yeah, and just listen to what they have to say, what
I really feel badly for anybodywho comes here in the middle of
the winter if they've left awarm country.
If they're honest, the weathergets better Three months of the
year it's paradise.
Speaker 2 (46:24):
You know what, though ?
Speaker 3 (46:26):
That being said, I work with a few people that come
from a warm country, talking tothem, and they love the winter,
they love it, they love snowbecause they've they never seen
it before.
And then they came in, theyjust fell in love with it and
I'm sitting here going you'renuts yeah exactly great for you
that you love it well, a changeof season.
Yes, yes, yeah, yeah so but theysome of them legit love snow
(46:49):
and I'm just kind of like Iwould be okay if I never saw it
again.
Okay, but you know, Yay forglobal warming.
Yeah, it's funny I say that mywife says stop saying that,
because like I don't necessarily, like you know, I'm obviously
for supporting like improvementsin the climate and all that
stuff, but at the same time I'mkind of like, yeah, all right,
I'm okay with we didn't get snowanymore.
Speaker 1 (47:09):
Kind of Well, I have a friend, he's a tattoo artist.
He moved here from Edmonton andso when he moved he said,
delene, I need to get a plug-infor my car and if you've ever
been to Grand Prairie, dotsonPort.
St John okay, I mean, evenparking meters have plug-ins.
And I said you need rubberboots.
(47:30):
And he said what are youtalking about?
I said when you know you're aMaritimer is when you buy a pair
of rubber boots you do not needa block heater and he's like,
but there's one in my car, Isaid, well, you know, maybe
somebody will find you a plug.
But you know.
So the other day, not too longago, he said to me okay, I have
rubber boots.
I said, yay, you're one of us.
Speaker 3 (47:50):
I started dating my wife 15 years ago.
So I was early mid-20s when Istarted dating my wife and that
was the first time I startedspending a lot of time in Quebec
and I noticed that a lot ofcars were plugged in and I was
just kind of like what the hellis this?
And she was like plug the carin so that the battery doesn't
freeze up.
And I was like what, what areyou talking about?
And then now, so when peoplecomplain about winters, my wife,
(48:13):
who lives here now obviouslyshe's like every winter I'm here
is the best winter I've everhad.
So it's all perspective,exactly 100%.
Speaker 2 (48:23):
Yeah, well, we got to get into our 10 questions.
Speaker 1 (48:25):
Let's get into it Before we do.
Speaker 2 (48:27):
I just got one question for you, just on the
networking tip, you know.
I mean, where do you see thefuture of professional
networking heading, especiallyin Atlantic Canada?
Where do you think it's goingto go?
Speaker 1 (48:38):
Well, my mission is to teach people that any room
you're in that's got more thanone or two people, it's an
opportunity.
Are you open to opportunity?
Are you curious about theperson in front of you?
And you're not there to sell.
You're not going to sell at anetworking event.
You're going to find a humanconnection and see if you like
them first, which will eliminatemany of your headaches when you
(49:01):
want to shoot a customer.
Speaker 3 (49:02):
Fair enough.
Yeah, speed dating is what it'slooking like.
Speaker 2 (49:07):
Speed dating your business.
Speaker 3 (49:09):
So, all right, let's get into our 10 questions.
We each have five.
Do you want to start or do youwant me to start?
Go ahead, matt.
You want me to start?
All right, cool, all right.
So question number one.
So what's the book title ofyour life?
Speaker 1 (49:24):
Are you allergic to networking?
Okay?
Speaker 2 (49:28):
Okay, I like that.
Speaker 1 (49:28):
Or richness in my roots.
Speaker 2 (49:31):
Are you allergic to networking?
I like the first networking.
Speaker 3 (49:32):
I like that I like are you allergic to networking
that would catch people'sattention?
Yeah, I like it.
Alright, number two over toMike.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Alright, if networking was an animal, okay,
what animal would you be?
And why so a bunch of animalsin a room?
You know of the animal kingdom?
What would they lean be?
Speaker 1 (49:50):
Hmm, I'll have to think about that for a minute.
Maybe a rabbit?
Speaker 2 (49:56):
Okay, why did you pick?
Speaker 1 (49:57):
rabbit, they could multiply, hey that's good.
Speaker 3 (50:01):
Grow your network.
Speaker 1 (50:02):
Yeah, that's good, but they're also cute and cuddly
.
There you go, that's a greatanswer, perfect, all right.
Speaker 3 (50:07):
Next question.
So if you could pick entrancemusic like a WWE wrestler, what
song would you pick for yourentrance music?
Speaker 1 (50:18):
oh, shoot um oh just one second I love anything from
mama mia.
What would work something frommama mia?
Speaker 3 (50:30):
I have a dream okay, all right, nice right.
Speaker 2 (50:33):
Nice.
Speaker 3 (50:34):
That's good.
If you don't have a dream, I'mnot familiar with Mamma Mia.
Speaker 2 (50:36):
I've got to be honest with you.
Speaker 1 (50:38):
Oh, you've got to Well they should never have
gotten paid for doing that movie.
No.
They had too much frigging fun.
Speaker 3 (50:44):
All right.
Question number four what am I?
Speaker 2 (50:48):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (50:56):
Do you believe in?
Speaker 3 (50:57):
luck or do you think we create our own opportunities
through connection?
The smarter I work, the luckierI get.
You know what?
That's good advice?
And that was advice that wasalso given to me a long time ago
by a professional golfer, likea pga golfer.
I said you know?
I asked what tiger woods?
And he I was like, do you thinkhe's lucky, do you think he's
good?
And he said you know, he saidthe funny thing about him is he
works so hard that on the daysthat he's good, he's good, and
(51:18):
the days that he's not good,he's lucky.
Speaker 1 (51:21):
Well, but you have to remember how old was he when
his dad put a golf club in his100%.
So if you've read any ofMalcolm Gladwell's books
Outliers, he put in more thanhis 10,000 hours in more than
his 10,000 hours Exactly, ohyeah.
Overnight success only takes 15years.
Speaker 3 (51:36):
Yeah, okay, there you go.
Overnight success takes 15years.
There you go, I like it Allright, so next question.
So what is the top place in theworld to visit on your bucket
list?
Speaker 1 (51:48):
Oh Greece.
Speaker 3 (51:49):
Greece.
Okay, Really yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:52):
Although Bali in Indonesia was pretty hard to
beat.
Speaker 3 (51:55):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (51:55):
Every year I earned trips from Mary Kay.
Oh, yeah, yeah, oh.
Thailand I ate dinner at thePrince of Siam.
Speaker 3 (52:06):
Siam, the Prince of Siam.
Yes, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (52:10):
On the Grand Canal.
Wow, yeah, like I've traveledthe world in a custom that most
people would never.
Speaker 3 (52:18):
yeah yeah, yeah, amazing, very cool but yeah,
greece all right all right overto you okay.
Speaker 2 (52:27):
So what's the strangest or most unexpected
connection that you've ever madethat led to something big.
So a strange connection thatyou never thought would you know
you, you're a natural networker.
It led to something big.
Speaker 1 (52:40):
You never saw it coming wow, well, that's a good
one.
I I met somebody that um inpassing that I ended up going to
poland and opening mary k in inPoland when it first happened.
Speaker 2 (52:55):
Oh, wow.
Speaker 1 (52:56):
Yeah, likely introduced me to a hundred
people before I ever got there.
Speaker 2 (52:59):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (52:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:00):
Just same thing in passing.
Speaker 3 (53:02):
Cool.
Speaker 1 (53:03):
All right.
Speaker 3 (53:05):
Good.
Next question so you'reorganizing a network event with
Finger Foods.
What is the one food thatshould never be at a networking
event?
Speaker 1 (53:15):
Anything that needs a fork.
Speaker 2 (53:18):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (53:18):
That's a good question.
Speaker 2 (53:20):
I like that one, so nothing that includes a fork at
a networking event.
Speaker 3 (53:24):
I was thinking something stinky, but yeah,
that's a good point.
Speaker 2 (53:27):
Poutine not good, not good, no yeah.
Speaker 1 (53:32):
Like literally finger food.
Speaker 3 (53:35):
Yeah, you know.
Speaker 1 (53:36):
Yeah, preferably one bite.
Speaker 3 (53:39):
Fair enough, makes sense.
Ok, over to you.
Speaker 2 (53:42):
Second last question, yeah, ok.
So if you could host a dinnerparty with any three networkers,
dead or alive, who would it beand why?
Speaker 1 (53:51):
Sam Horn.
I just spent a weekend with herin Austin, texas.
If you've never heard of her,her company's called the
Intrigue Agency BrilliantBrilliant.
I would love it if it were MaryKay Ash again, but she's not
here.
So Dr Ivan Meisner, I've methim personally.
He was the founder of BNI andthat certainly he is still very
(54:17):
active, even though you know BNIis no longer technically his
company.
Who else?
Three people?
Speaker 2 (54:29):
Give me a like a historic.
Speaker 1 (54:30):
I'm happy talking to you two.
Speaker 2 (54:31):
Okay, that's awesome.
Yeah, well, two for one.
But how about give us ahistoric figure?
Oh, a historic figure Likesomebody from any time, dead or
alive.
What do you think of that?
It would just be really nice tohave a networking event with
you.
Speaker 1 (54:41):
Was it Roosevelt, his wife?
What was her name?
Eleanor.
Speaker 2 (54:46):
Eleanor Roosevelt.
Eleanor Roosevelt, verypro-women yeah, nice, love it
yeah.
Speaker 3 (54:51):
Okay, cool On to you, Matt.
So it's our last question.
Speaker 2 (54:54):
Was it Second last question?
Speaker 3 (54:56):
Well, okay, you go then because I have the last
question.
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (54:59):
Sorry.
Okay, I've got another one.
If someone had a networkingspirit guide whispering in their
ear at an event, what would itbe telling them not to do?
Speaker 1 (55:13):
Try to close the sale .
Oh, don't be their heartselling at an event yeah, why
would you sell to somebody ifyou don't even know?
Speaker 2 (55:21):
them Right.
Speaker 1 (55:23):
So if you pretend that somebody's got a sign
around them that says make mefeel important, like when I
would go to a networking event,I'd stand in the corner, I'd
pray somebody would talk to me.
Well, if you stand in thecorner, you don't look friendly
and so you know, after havingdone everything wrong, I would
say okay, I'm going to go standby the door, I'll wave to
anybody I know Hi, I'll talk toyou later.
(55:43):
I'd wait, till.
That person with the deer inthe headlights came through the
door and I would say you lookmore afraid than me, and they
would be.
Sometimes people would hug me.
It's like, oh my God, thank God, and I said I feel just like
you, but now we're together.
Speaker 2 (55:55):
I feel like it's a great time to ask you this Will
you buy ad space in this show?
Yeah, yeah, okay, cool, becausewe've taken a while.
Now I think I've gotten to knowyou.
It's a good time to kind of gofor the close right, exactly,
perfect.
Speaker 3 (56:17):
Okay, you, I know what you deliver, okay, so last
question that we have here.
Speaker 1 (56:19):
so what's one piece of advice that you were given
that you'd like to share with usokay um, be curious, be curious
, yeah, always be curious.
Everybody's got a story to tell.
Yeah, and if you're willing toreally listen, not like a brick
but like a sponge- yeah that youwill.
You will find the most amazingstories from people.
And look at you two.
You could write a book rightnow.
(56:40):
I hope that's in the works.
Speaker 2 (56:41):
Well, I think we found an amazing story today and
I'm very thankful that you cameand told us oh exactly, it's
great yeah you got a great story.
Speaker 3 (56:50):
I think people will find it really interesting.
Yes, we kind of thing Notnecessarily about us, but I
think about our experiences withguests.
Speaker 1 (56:57):
Right, like people, like yourself, okay, but here's
the thing.
You write about their story,but then you write your takeaway
, and you write your takeawayExactly yeah, that's exactly
what I have kind of proposedLike to Matt.
Speaker 2 (57:07):
Already we have a Matt and a Mike section on each
guest.
Speaker 1 (57:10):
So if you haven't heard Sam Horn.
Look her up, sam, if youhaven't heard.
Speaker 2 (57:13):
Sam Horn look her up.
Sam Horn Start following her.
Speaker 1 (57:15):
Cool.
She used to run the Maui BookPublishing Conference.
That's where first-time authorscould come to Maui.
I mean that would be a greattrip and actually get to sit in
front of all of the majorpublishing houses.
Speaker 3 (57:30):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (57:30):
And so for 20 years she did that she would stand at
the back of the room and sothese people would have 10
minutes to do a pitch.
And she said so sad andpathetic.
She could tell in the first 60seconds like if you're 3.30 or 4
o'clock in the afternoon andit's every 10 minutes there's a
pitch these people are.
Speaker 3 (57:47):
You know, you're exhausted, you're pitched out
but she would say this must beher wearing the hat on LinkedIn.
Speaker 2 (57:53):
Okay, I'm going to send her a connect request and
we're going to see if shelistens to the episode, because
she'll connect.
If she listened, there we goSent.
All right, we'll see what's up.
Speaker 1 (58:00):
Okay, she is amazing.
I spent a whole weekend there.
Speaker 2 (58:08):
I've been following her for a while she lives about
10 minutes from Dr Ivan Me.
Speaker 1 (58:13):
She said I could tell .
So she started another company,the Intrigue Agency, and what
she has gone on to do is teachpeople how to perfect a pitch
that gets people to raise theireyebrows Like if you were to
squint, squint right, Inaturally squint.
Speaker 2 (58:30):
Yeah, you do.
But squinting means you knowyou do, but squinting means you
know you're not getting it ifyou say something and ask a
question yeah right.
Speaker 1 (58:40):
She says if somebody asks what you do, don't tell
them.
Right right so would you afriend or a business
professional?
She says if somebody asks whatyou do, don't tell them ask a
three-part question Would you, afriend or business associate,
need to network but are allergicto it?
That's what I do.
(59:00):
I teach people how to getcomfortable and actually enjoy
networking.
Okay, right, okay, that raises.
Usually if you can get somebodyto raise their eyebrows, that
means somebody's listening.
Speaker 2 (59:14):
Fair enough 100% yeah .
Speaker 3 (59:16):
Well, thank you, we have to thank.
We've.
Actually we're here at theClayton Park Bar and Grill.
Yes so thank you to them forhosting and letting us record
here.
Darlene, thank you very muchfor coming on the show and
honestly thank you.
You've been a big supporter ofus.
You're constantly sharing stuffand liking stuff.
Speaker 2 (59:35):
Thank you for that.
Speaker 3 (59:36):
We do appreciate very much yeah and you even asked us
to speak at one of your events.
So, honestly, truly, trulythankful for your you know just,
you know support, you know thatthat kind of virtual and
non-virtual support, weappreciate it you have to know
I'm, I am going to form the fanclub and anybody like you two
(59:57):
who share positives, who shareand support people.
Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
I don't think there's any greater service that we can
do to mankind.
And you haven't seen the lastof me because, stay tuned, we're
going to be doing a big eventfor Small Business Week at the
library with these two.
Speaker 2 (01:00:16):
Yes, we're going to come back and hang out with you
again in October.
Speaker 3 (01:00:18):
I really look forward to that.
It'll be fun.
Cheers to you, delaney.
Thank you very much, that wasgreat.
Bye.
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