Jacqueline and Wendy: Survivors of Human Trafficking and Domestic Violence are now the Saviours of others with 'Thriving Twogether.'

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Cheers.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
Welcome to the Afternoon Pint.
I'm Mike Tobin, I am MattConrad, and who do we have with
us today?

Speaker 3 (00:07):
I'm Jacqueline, the Executive Director of Thriving
Together Society.

Speaker 4 (00:10):
And I'm Wendy, the Executive Director of Community
Engagement at Thriving TogetherSociety.

Speaker 2 (00:15):
What is Thriving Together Society?

Speaker 3 (00:17):
It is a wraparound support in the Western zone for
intimate partner violence, humantrafficking, mental health for
men.
There's a lot of gaps in ourservices for men specifically
that are causing harm againstwomen, and Wendy and I believe
that we cannot support womenwithout supporting the male
population.
So we opened up the ThrivingTogether Society in the hopes of

(00:41):
working with those that arecausing harm and challenge those
behaviors, as typically our menare just not waking up and
deciding to harm women.
It is a learned behavior and itis trauma, generational trauma.

Speaker 2 (00:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (00:52):
Our men are experiencing things and there's
not enough supports for them.

Speaker 2 (00:56):
Wow, okay, so you impact a lot there.
Yeah, so I mean so this so youguys help people that are in
need, and this starts from humantrafficking and stems into
domestic violence.
You really need help.

Speaker 3 (01:08):
Absolutely.

Speaker 2 (01:08):
Is that what it is?

Speaker 1 (01:09):
Yeah, I think it's important to highlight too we're
in June which is Men's MentalHealth.

Speaker 2 (01:13):
Month.
Yes, it is.

Speaker 1 (01:14):
This is actually a really good time to talk about
this type of thing, we did talka little bit about men's mental
health with Liz LeClaire, ourprevious guest, which I thought
was a interesting way to addressthe violence that's happening
in the province and in thecountry.
Whereas it's so quick to peoplego and just be like that guy's
a monster, whereas to take it asan approach of like you know,

(01:39):
he may have been a victim who isnow abusing yes absolutely is a
different approach, which maybe a you know it's hard to.
It's hard when someone'scommitting a crime and hurting
people to like show them anyform of empathy but at the same
time, if we want to fix theproblem, that may be the right
route to go 100, yeah, and Ithink, like what's important to
recognize is we're all humans,we all deserve the same quality

(02:02):
of care.

Speaker 3 (02:03):
that someone that is a victim and someone that is
causing harm they still deservethat same quality of care,
regardless if you're a victim oran accused, and that's
something that is reallyimportant to us, because we're
not going to see a difference ifwe're not supporting them.

Speaker 2 (02:19):
Yeah, and Thriving Together is an optimistic name
and the two is T-W-O.
Yes so this is assistance.
This is help for people thatare really in need.
Right, yeah, absolutely that'sawesome that you guys are doing
this, and I got to ask, like,what drove you?
Like I'd love to know each oneof your stories individually.
That brought you to this.
So we'll start with you whatwas your story that got you

(02:41):
there?

Speaker 3 (02:42):
So I grew up in care Okay, I was a child in care in
Ontario, Most of my childhood inand out of foster homes, group
homes and my biological family.
And I was also a humantrafficking.
I'm a survivor of humantrafficking for 11 years, Wow.

Speaker 1 (03:00):
From what age to what age?

Speaker 3 (03:01):
From the age of 11.
Wow Age 11.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
11.
You were Age 11.
11.
So you were a child, yeah.

Speaker 3 (03:07):
So often for children in care.

Speaker 2 (03:11):
We're easily exploited because we're
vulnerable and children in carequote, unquote.
What does that mean?
Foster care, Foster care, right?
Okay, yeah, yeah.
So kids you were in foster careand how, in the like, what
happened?

Speaker 3 (03:30):
How did this happen that you two you had 11 years
old, what, where?
How did you?
I was in a group home, okay,and it's uh.
I was approached by anindividual that was a well-known
community member and, um, hepromised me the world and like a
public figure kind of person uh, not public figure, but a
community member okay so someonethat was coaching and doing
things within the school systemand was involved in the foster
care system, uh.
So I respected him and he waslike, come stay with me, come

(03:53):
see this, I'll give you a cellphone.
And I needed that.

Speaker 1 (03:57):
I wanted a parent's love and he was an adult yeah,
but you know what's like it'snot the first time I've heard
something along like that Likethere's somebody who I know,
whose daughter almost wentthrough that.
It started just the way yousaid it she wasn't in care, she
was living with her mom and shewas lured out.

(04:20):
I think she might have been 14,maybe, but lured out right and
basically 14 maybe, but luredout right and and basically like
, yeah, we'll give you a debitcard, we'll give you the cell
phone.
Well, they promised you theworld yeah, it's like stay with
us and like you know you canstay out late, like whatever.
Right, it's like all thosethings that a teenager wants to
do, that a parent protects youfrom making those mistakes.
They say, ah, you'll be okay.
Yeah, it's.

(04:41):
It's amazing and what I learnedfrom that experience because
she called me just because Iknow some politicians and some
police officers and stuff.
She was like, what can I do?
And I was like, honestly, Idon't know.
But I will talk to some people.
But the thing I learned thatnight was, at 14 years of age,
the police can't go and take heraway.

Speaker 2 (05:02):
So back to you, so the police can't take you away.
You're trapped.
At what point did you realizeyou were in a bad place as a kid
?

Speaker 4 (05:08):
You're 11 years old.

Speaker 2 (05:09):
No no.
And how many years were yousuffering through this 11 years?
I can't, just can't believe it.

Speaker 3 (05:15):
And, like I, think what is common for children in
care is we're abused at homewith our biological families.
So we don't see anythingdifferent, we don't know
anything different.

Speaker 2 (05:24):
Right.

Speaker 3 (05:24):
And when someone was approaching me and being kind to
me, that's what I wanted.
Um, and then, as soon as thegrooming and the exploitation
started happening, I was like,well, this is normal, like this
has happened before.
Um, I was sexually abused as achild, so that was normal Um so.
I just accepted it and so thisis.

Speaker 2 (05:47):
You felt like this is a righteous path, in a sense of
being being welcomed intosomebody's life, absolutely so
what?

Speaker 1 (05:55):
at what point did like does it go from?
Stay with me and I'll give youeverything to changing that to
like.
I'm now going to like pimp youout.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
Uh, you don't notice it.

Speaker 1 (06:07):
No, okay.

Speaker 3 (06:08):
Um for my experience.

Speaker 4 (06:10):
I didn't notice it.

Speaker 3 (06:11):
Um, I was.
There was like I was sleepingwith men already at age 11.
So it wasn't different.
Um, so, someone was now gaining.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
This is an Ontario.
Yeah, okay.

Speaker 3 (06:22):
So it was like I was helping them yeah, and I love
helping people, so it was aneasy way to buy me in and, as
soon as I got, to provide othergirls with opportunities to have
a life and help them, becausenow I'm feeding them.

Speaker 2 (06:40):
It made sense to me.
This is heartbreaking man.
I'm so sorry to hear that youhad to go through this mean I
know it's a long time ago.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you'refreaking warrior for doing what
you're doing now.
This is like amazing to me,yeah, like I don't know how
somebody survives that you don'thave a choice yeah, so what I?

Speaker 3 (06:56):
see now is is normal.
Yeah, and that's horrible andwe don't talk about it enough no
and I think that's why I'm sopassionate, passionate about it.

Speaker 2 (07:05):
I think people shy away from this stuff because
it's super uncomfortable, right?
I mean it's uncomfortable forme to ask you these questions
right now, 100%.
I'm not sure if it'suncomfortable to answer them,
but like it is like you know.

Speaker 3 (07:25):
I mean I'm a little warmer was a problem until I was
20.

Speaker 2 (07:29):
Yeah, until you were 20.
Can I ask, like, what was theepiphany for you, what was the
day, or can you even rememberthe time where you said, holy
shit, what am I doing?
This isn't normal.

Speaker 3 (07:40):
I'm rebellious.

Speaker 2 (07:42):
I'm very stubborn, right.

Speaker 3 (07:44):
Um, there was an incident I refused to do
something and I had consequencesto me refusing, and those
refusals um are extreme.
So, that's that moment I, Ikept refusing and kept refusing.

Speaker 2 (08:10):
Realize you had no power in this situation.

Speaker 3 (08:12):
I didn't have power, I didn't have a voice, I didn't
have a say yeah.
So, and you're?

Speaker 2 (08:16):
a grown person at that point yeah.
And, like we're, we're drugsinvolved.
Were you addicted to drugs?

Speaker 3 (08:21):
No, so like drugs were a part of it, but not the
ring I was in.
That was not the main focus.

Speaker 2 (08:29):
It's weird, because I thought that was how they get
most people.
Sometimes they get young peopleand they get them addicted to
bad drugs.
That's what I believe thenarrative is.

Speaker 1 (08:37):
That is very much a Hollywood thing that we see, but
I'm sure it happens for real.
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (08:41):
But kids in care just want someone's attention.

Speaker 2 (08:44):
Right.

Speaker 3 (08:44):
Someone to love them.

Speaker 2 (08:46):
Such a basic human need Someone to accept them yeah
.

Speaker 3 (08:48):
And validate what they're feeling and what they're
seeing and be told you deservebetter.
Yeah, so the drugs wasn't anissue.
Did I use drugs?
Yes, yeah, but there was moreharsh consequences Gasoline so
abuse, but there was more harshconsequences.

Speaker 1 (09:05):
Gasoline Abuse Gasoline.

Speaker 3 (09:06):
Being poured on bodies that burns.

Speaker 1 (09:10):
Well, yeah.

Speaker 2 (09:15):
So, there was other forms of tactics that they used
Unreal and like how big arethese organizations?
Is this a one psychopath or isthis a psychopath that's in a
network of psychopaths?
How does this theseorganizations?
Is this a one cycle path or isthis a cycle path that's in a
network of cycle paths?
How does this even work?
Like I don't understand.

Speaker 3 (09:32):
That's a really hard question to answer.

Speaker 2 (09:34):
Sure, yeah no.

Speaker 4 (09:35):
And it depends.
Like it's not necessarily.
Sometimes it is just one singleperson, other times it's a
whole ring, yeah, and a lot ofthe rings are connected between
provinces, like they move fromNova Scotia to New Brunswick, to
Ontario, to Montreal, likeQuebec, bc.
They take them all over theplace, and sometimes it's just
your partner, your intimatepartner, and they use you so

(09:58):
they're able to secure drugs.
They sell you to get what theywant.
To them you're just a paycheck,but to the survivors it
actually feels like they're in aloving relationship.
It's the first time they'veever been loved.
Yeah, it's the first timesanyone's actually cared about
them and first time anyone'sbought them anything um so they
really feed into thatvulnerability so it's, it's not.

Speaker 3 (10:22):
I can't just say it's one person.
Yeah, there's a collective ofpeople in different varieties,
and each situation is different.

Speaker 1 (10:29):
I think it's not a secret that you know, like we
know, that there's issues inNova Scotia and that there's a
lot of like trafficking.

Speaker 3 (10:38):
So Nova Scotia is the highest per capita.

Speaker 4 (10:41):
It's the highest per capita Of Canada Substantially
higher, like 6.3 per 100,000.

Speaker 2 (10:47):
Is this a law enforcement problem?
What is the problem there?

Speaker 4 (10:49):
We're in a coastal community, we're what?
Always within 67 kilometers?
Oh my gosh, okay.

Speaker 2 (10:55):
So they're literally putting people in containers and
stuff.

Speaker 3 (10:58):
No, no, no, that doesn't.
No, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
I mean, I guess, I get everything from action
movies like Liam Neeson takenright, like you know, sorry, and
that does happen, yeah, butthat's not typically what we see
working in the field.

Speaker 1 (11:11):
Is it Taurus?
Is that what it is Like?
Is that why, or what's the dealwith like?
Why does ocean like havingsurrounded by ocean?

Speaker 3 (11:17):
Because so if you go to Yarmouth, you can go to Digby
.
You can go to New Brunswick youcan go the 103, the 101.
You go to Cape Breton you cango to.
Pei, you can go to Newfoundland.
You have all the major portsthat can get you to different
parts of the world.

Speaker 2 (11:34):
So back to you, sorry .
Yeah absolutely so.
You went, you were 20 years oldand you realized this 22.
22 years old.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
When I got out, when you got out.

Speaker 2 (11:42):
So 20,.
You realize there was somethingwrong.
Yeah Right.
And then what were the steps ofgetting out?
Like, how did you untangleyourself from this web?
Because you must have beendeeply entrapped at this point.
That's not like a small amountof time.
This is all you knew.

Speaker 3 (11:54):
Yeah, yeah.
So it took lots of patience,lots of time there's not many
organizations that work with theaftercare so having your
identity stolen and trying tofigure that out and fraud.
So bankruptcy is a huge thingfor victims of trafficking
because your identity is beingused to pay the power to pay

(12:18):
Internet.
So it took me years I think Iwas 28 when I finally was able
to look at my stuff and say,okay, I'm okay, I'm going to be
okay.

Speaker 2 (12:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (12:30):
Um intense therapy, and I still attend therapy daily
, like not daily, but at leastyeah.
Um, and then talking about it,just openly, talking about it
with people is something thathelps healing.
Peer-to-peer support is a realthing.
It's a vital service forvictims and survivors so you got

(12:51):
out of this world yeah, and I Imoved to nova scotia, yeah, um
is.

Speaker 1 (12:56):
It was the move to nova scotia.
Like to just escape, like thecircle, or to escape like just a
change of scenery, or like likethe circle, or to escape like
just a change of scenery or likedid you like were people trying
to bring you back, kind ofthing.

Speaker 3 (13:07):
No, so I met my partner, um, he's originally
from Barrington and we playedball together.
Oh, cool, I'm very competitivein baseball, okay, um.
So we played baseball togetherand met in Ontario and, um, I
have a foster home and I had.
I was a foster parent and I havea foster home and I was a
foster parent and I'm stilltechnically a foster parent in

(13:28):
Nova Scotia.
So we rented an RV and broughtour children down here to visit
Nova Scotia to meet my partner'sparents, and we fell in love
with Nova Scotia.
Cool, we were in back row, soCrow's Ne, I think it's called
in the South shore, and we spentevery day in September in the

(13:49):
ocean and we loved it.
So we went back to Ontario andover, always looking over your
shoulder to see if someone'sfollowing you is a real thing,
um paranoia, um fearful thatpeople have found you or located
you.
What are they trying to convinceLike?
What are they trying to do?

(14:10):
Was a thing in my mind.
So I struggled with mentalhealth and I struggled with
worry.
So my body would respond tothose situations and it would be
a trauma response.
So I'd have oftenhospitalization um life support
because my body wasn'tresponding give away that
extreme stress I've been readingso much about.

Speaker 2 (14:32):
I'm reading.
I'm reading a book right now.
I read a lot of weird books.
It's called this.

Speaker 3 (14:35):
One's called supernatural healing okay, you
should read body.
The body keeps the score.
Okay, yeah, amazing book but.

Speaker 2 (14:41):
But what the book's kind of talking about is like
living through past traumas andlike how people have terrible
things happen and their bodiesbecome paralyzed.

Speaker 3 (14:47):
Yeah, they live it Like your body is always living
it and you just keep relivingthis nightmare over and over
again.

Speaker 2 (14:52):
It can actually just be worse, like over time, right.

Speaker 3 (14:55):
So we came in 2021 to visit my partner's family and
then my partner's mom came downfor Christmas and we celebrated
Christmas and then December 28thhe was like let's move to Nova
Scotia you were like hell yeah,I'm like okay, and I was
expecting a time frame.

(15:15):
So he was an accountant at thetime and so I was like we're
going into tax season, we'regoing to move probably next year
.
And he's like let's move inJanuary.
Wow, I'm like, let's move inJanuary.
Wow, I'm like December 28th andwe moved January 28th of 2022.

Speaker 2 (15:28):
Right, no, looking back here.
You're happy, you're here.

Speaker 1 (15:30):
Question for you, and you can feel free to not answer
this, but like what are thestruggles of having a monogamous
relationship with somebodyafter everything that you've
gone through?
And like what can that otherperson do to best support you?

Speaker 3 (15:45):
Communication.
So there's certain things Iwon't allow in a relationship,
like watching porn is notsomething I'm interested in.
And he supports that and helistens to it.
We have safe words.

Speaker 2 (15:59):
No, he doesn't watch porn either.
Or just you don't watch porn,we don't.

Speaker 3 (16:02):
Yeah, both it's a mutual thing, yeah um then, like
safe words saying if he's doingsomething, I'm not feeling
comfortable, then I'll say thisthe word and he just stops
that's a good partner, yeah andif I'm not interested, he
doesn't force it, that's awesomeum yeah, and I, I lead what I

(16:23):
want to do yeah so thecommunication is key in a
relationship after like being asurvivor yeah that's a great
question yeah no great questionyeah do you mind if we ask your
story and how you got involvedwith with the together to gather
, we thrive, sorry.

Speaker 4 (16:43):
Thriving Together Society.

Speaker 2 (16:45):
Thriving.

Speaker 4 (16:45):
Together, so Jacqueline and I are actually
from the same community.

Speaker 1 (16:50):
Oh, no way we did not know each other.
We worked in the sameorganization.

Speaker 4 (16:56):
When she came, she said the name of the town and I
was like no, you have to bekidding me, there's no way I'm
trying to get away from there.

Speaker 1 (17:04):
Okay, so you're on your way out of Yarmouth.

Speaker 3 (17:07):
No out of Ontario, no Ontario.

Speaker 4 (17:09):
Ontario okay, you were on your way out of Ontario,
no we met at the sameorganization, so I was already
out of Ontario.
I actually lived inNewfoundland for a little bit
and then I came to Nova Scotiaand then we were both working at
the same organization.
I was already there.
She comes in and she's like oh,I'm like oh, where are you from
in Ontario?
And she says the place.
And I'm like no, there's no wayyou're from there, like that's

(17:31):
where I'm from.
Now we do have like a sevenyear age gap.
So, we didn't really come incontact with each other.
I left Ontario when I was 22.
So she was just a child when Ileft.
Amazing.
But, it was just like thatinvisible string theory, where
they bring people in your lifewhen you need them most.
And then, within working inthat organization, we saw the

(17:53):
gaps.
We saw that we weren't able tohelp the people that really
needed the help.
I'm actually a recovered addict, okay, so I've been clean for
15, 16 years, thank you.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
So I come in from that aspect.
I have that history.
I've done withdrawal.
It's hugely helpful for whatyou guys are trying to do.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (18:14):
Yeah, and I have tattoos, I have a bunch of
piercings.
So when people come in and theysee me.
It's very welcoming.

Speaker 2 (18:22):
They see themselves.

Speaker 4 (18:23):
Yeah, exactly I'm a version of them.
I didn't have any self-esteemgrowing up.
I'm surprised I didn't fallinto trafficking.
I think I was very lucky not to.
I lived in a country, ruralarea in Ontario and then, yeah,
we just kind of crossed paths.
Even before I started workingwhere we worked, I was actually

(18:44):
homeless.
Homeless and pregnant, and justhad left a domestic violence
situation with my child's father, so I was fleeing that, I was
couch surfing and everythingwhile I was pregnant.
I think.
Finally, when my daughter wasfour months old, I was finally
able to sustain housing.
So it was rough, for I think Ileft him when I was six months

(19:05):
pregnant.

Speaker 1 (19:06):
Were you here in Nova Scotia or still in Ontario.

Speaker 4 (19:08):
No, I was in Yarmouth .

Speaker 1 (19:10):
You were in Yarmouth, okay, at that time, okay.

Speaker 4 (19:11):
So it all happened here.
And then I'm like, oh, I needto do something.
I need to help people that arelike me, people that have always
felt not the same as everyoneelse, a little bit different,
I'm very unique.
So I'm going to go take socialservices.
So I went to NSCC, I got mysocial services diploma and then
I did the two and two.

(19:32):
So after that I actually wentto Mount St Vincent and I got my
bachelor's degree.

Speaker 2 (19:36):
That's nice Yep.

Speaker 4 (19:38):
All while raising my child.
Being a single parent, I alsohave a 20-year-old son, so
there's a bit of an age gapthere.
There's a 13-year age gapbetween my two children, and he
grew up with a mom as an addict.

Speaker 2 (19:50):
Yeah, he was five.
He has a whole differentversion of you than your younger
one.

Speaker 3 (19:54):
Yeah, and we grew up together.

Speaker 4 (19:57):
So I feel for these people in these situations and I
give them exactly what I needed.

Speaker 2 (20:04):
Can I ask what you were addicted to?
Cocaine, cocaine, yeah, yeah,wow.

Speaker 3 (20:07):
And I have to say that Wendy's children are
incredible.
I love her son and I love herdaughter.
I couldn't imagine my lifewithout them.

Speaker 2 (20:15):
Awesome, and they're both still in your life, which
is awesome.
Yeah, yeah, that's really good.

Speaker 4 (20:18):
My son's actually now going to Mount St Vincent
himself.
Oh.

Speaker 2 (20:21):
St Vincent himself, oh cool.

Speaker 4 (20:21):
So it's kind of like that full circle moment he's
doing political science.

Speaker 2 (20:25):
Oh neat.
So I'm very proud of him.
Okay, that's awesome.

Speaker 4 (20:28):
Yeah, so I kind of flipped that all around and I
think part of going into socialservices.
You know I was 40 years old,yeah.
And I was going back to school.
I hadn't been to school in 20years.
I graduated in 2000, and Ireapplied in 2020.

Speaker 2 (20:41):
Talk about changing your life at 40.

Speaker 1 (20:43):
That's awesome, I love that, but yeah like you
know, my buddy, Gary Vee, says,like you know, you're not dead
at 40, you're not dead at 60.
100%.
Do whatever you want with yourlife, right, if you want to make
it, like you know.
But it's great to see someonewho was like so down, for sure
To be able to like rise up againand really kind of, really, not

(21:05):
only have you completely turnedthings around, uh, you know,
obviously, like financially,like just you're yourself,
you're being and everything, butyou're now also doing good work
, right?

Speaker 3 (21:15):
you're not just like oh, you know what I have I got.

Speaker 1 (21:18):
I got a good job.
I'm a manager of this like a.
You know, I manage ikea.

Speaker 3 (21:21):
Whatever right, like you're also turning around and
using it to put and I thinksometimes my parents wishes that
I became a manager of the storerather than doing what I think
it's important for both Wendyand I both is to create an
organization that we needed,yeah when you have, and the good

(21:43):
thing is that you each haveexperiences that would support.

Speaker 1 (21:48):
They're very different experiences, but you
can help more people than if youboth had the similar experience
.

Speaker 2 (21:55):
right For sure, the yin and the yang yeah kind of.
Yeah, I think it's really cool.
I've noticed I've seen in a lotof smaller communities now
these are the ones that arestruggling the most.
Folks don't have a lot of helpfor addiction.
You can see this when you go tosmaller communities now.
We didn't see it on the street10 or 15 years ago.
It's right in front of yourface now, man, like it's really,
you know, really predominantright.

(22:17):
These times are not gettingeasier on certain folks and it's
showing right.
So these institutions reallyhelp.
So your place isn't a placewhere people can like go to you,
go to them.
It's more of a how does thatwork?

Speaker 3 (22:28):
So they can come to our location.
Okay, but we can also go tothem.
So we're at 4 Second Street inYarmouth, nova Scotia.
It's the old Vanguard building,which a lot of people know
because it's a newspaper.
So we have a small portion ofthat building.
It is quite large, uh.
So they can come in, they canget harm reduction supplies,

(22:49):
they can come get a freebreakfast at any time from 8, 30
to 5 that's cool.
Uh, they can get peer support.
We have a registered therapist.
Uh, that is in our building aswell okay uh, we have programs.
Yeah, it's great yeah, that's.

Speaker 1 (23:05):
Is this done through government subsidies or
fundraising?

Speaker 4 (23:09):
Yeah, Funny you bring that up.
We're actually completelyfunding it ourselves currently.

Speaker 2 (23:16):
No way, how?
So?
If anybody has any money outthere, honestly, how Not to be
rude, but how are you funding ityourselves?

Speaker 4 (23:21):
That's insane.
It's a struggle, and we justhad a few meetings with some
cabinet ministers.

Speaker 2 (23:26):
So you guys are going around asking people hat in
hand to help your community out?

Speaker 4 (23:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (23:31):
Yeah, wow, wow.

Speaker 4 (23:32):
And our history and the people that we've helped,
like they're all like how can wehelp?
What can we do?
Can?
we give a testimonial?
Can we do this?
Can we help in your peersupport?
Because who better to supportthan the people who have gotten
out of trafficking or havecaused domestic violence, have
been victims of domesticviolence and it's so empowering
to take that power back and beable to help the community.

(23:53):
So all of our clients are verywilling to do what they need to
do and our stats are showing itand we haven't heard a no yet.
It's just waiting for thosefunding and when you're a
non-for-profit organization,they actually expect you to have
a year of financials beforethey'll give you funding.

Speaker 2 (24:14):
How do you make it through a year right in the
not-for-profit world.

Speaker 4 (24:15):
Yeah, um so our breakfast bar is actually
provided by parents place, whichis another um community-led
organization within yarmouth.
Um, so they offer that Mainlineactually does our harm
reduction supplies.

Speaker 2 (24:26):
Okay, and then the two of us, so people can come to
you if they're for to get outthe, they can get syringes.
Thank you, they can get cookers.

Speaker 4 (24:33):
They can get pipes like crack pipes.
We also have test strips.
Most of the test strips arenormally used by like what I
call the weekend party orsomeone going to a rave.
They want to make sure thattheir drugs don't have fentanyl,
benzos or xylosine in them, sowe do offer those test strips.

Speaker 2 (24:49):
So you can go to your place, you can actually test
the drugs and go away with yourdrugs.

Speaker 4 (24:53):
Well, they take the tests themselves with them we
don't want to see any drugs.

Speaker 2 (24:57):
There's a little bit of some legalities around that.

Speaker 4 (25:01):
And I'm a recovering addict.
Do I want cocaine in mybuilding knowingly?

Speaker 2 (25:05):
and be testing it.

Speaker 1 (25:06):
It's a little bit of a temptation for me, still after
15 years 100%.

Speaker 4 (25:11):
So we supply those test strips.
They have to just use a littletiny bit of their product.
They mix it with some distilledwater and then it comes up to a
different color and that tellsyou whether it has fentanyl.
And then we also have thexylosine or the benzo.

Speaker 3 (25:24):
And we also have Narcans as well.

Speaker 4 (25:26):
Oh okay, narcans, yeah, both nasal and injectables
, because we have found a lot ofpeople who are recovering.
Addicts don't want to be aroundneedles.
They don't want to have theneedles of their Narcan kids.

Speaker 2 (25:36):
Fair enough, almost petrifying to see probably
what's triggering as well, andwe also encourage all users to
do not use alone.

Speaker 3 (25:45):
Use someone, use with someone.

Speaker 2 (25:47):
Yeah, use Okay.

Speaker 4 (25:48):
Because it's not safe to use alone.

Speaker 1 (25:50):
Obviously the OD.
Yeah, yeah, of course.

Speaker 4 (25:53):
And they do have the Good Samaritans law.
Although it's not perfect, itdoes protect someone,
essentially so.

Speaker 2 (25:58):
Good Samaritans.
Like somebody comes to you,just find someone to come at
your aid.

Speaker 4 (26:02):
Yeah, if you administer Narcan to somebody,
you have to call 911.
So then the police come.
They are not supposed to chargeyou with having illicit
substances because you're savinga life.
So it's called the GoodSamaritan Law.
They're not supposed to be ableto.
Now, if you're on parole andstuff, it gets a little iffy

(26:23):
there.
But it's supposed to allowpeople to give Narcan and not
just leave them on a bench whichhas happened recently in
Barrington actually.
So they want the people there,they want to be able to know how
many times have youadministered?
Because a lot of people thinkyou administer once and they're
good.
They're just going to come backto life and they're fine.
That's not the case.
Case depending on the amount ofdrugs in their system and their

(26:44):
ability to how long they'vebeen using drugs.
Sometimes it takes 10, 12 kidsto bring them back.
And they're giving it to theambulance in an IV line and just
constant Narcan.

Speaker 1 (26:58):
And a lot of people aren't aware of that, just to
keep them alive, essentiallyUntil they get to the hospital
Until they can get back.
Yeah, yeah, it's definitely.
You guys probably helped save alot of lives, man, essentially
until they get to the hospitaluntil they can get back man yeah
, so yeah, it's definitely uh,you guys probably helped save a
lot of lives man Like we hope so.

Speaker 4 (27:09):
I think you both did.
Yeah, that's amazing.
Well, and they save our ownlives.
Like it's so empowering to beable to give back.

Speaker 2 (27:15):
Oh yeah, and we learned so much from them.

Speaker 1 (27:19):
No, maybe I missed it .
When did you guys start yourorganization?

Speaker 3 (27:23):
In January, just in January of this year.

Speaker 1 (27:25):
Okay, so it's really really new and so yeah, so
basically we need to make surethat we uh really annoy uh the
government to make sure that yougot to get, we are doing that
too, but the more the better.
It's hard for them not tolisten, Tim was on our show and
wants to come back on.
He actually asked if he cancome back on.

Speaker 2 (27:43):
Maybe AP.
I think this should be our nextfundraiser, bro.
We'll get something to work.

Speaker 4 (27:50):
Put Tim on the hot seat, ask him.

Speaker 2 (27:55):
You guys brought a duetang.
I'm not making fun of yourduetang, it's just you guys have
some stuff you want to shareand let's go through some of
these topics and stuff.
I'd rather see what you guyshave some stuff you want to
share and, uh, let's go throughsome of the these topics and
stuff.
I'd rather see what you guyswanted to share with us today,
so please, well, I think one ofour biggest highlights is the
intimate partner violence okaywe're in an epidemic in nova

(28:16):
scotia yeah, liz leclair, Ithink took uh is taking this on
massively right now.
Yes, yeah she is.

Speaker 3 (28:23):
Uh, so men are causing harm and uh, our women
are suffering and it's we're notgoing to see a change, uh, if
we don't have a system in place.

Speaker 2 (28:34):
And we're reactive, we're not proactive when you
guys sit there, I mean and andpontificate or whatever.
How are you figuring it out?
Like, why is it becoming abigger problem?
It's such a weird thing to meto see these types of behaviors
not going away.

Speaker 3 (28:50):
So they're not going away because they're not being
supported.
How does someone get help?
When there's no organizationshelping them, and when we have
an issue with housing we have1,138 people right now that are
homeless.

Speaker 2 (29:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (29:04):
And out of that 1,138 , there is 1,109 adults, and 739
of them are critically homeless, and then we have 123.

Speaker 1 (29:15):
What does critically homeless mean?

Speaker 3 (29:16):
They're continuously homeless.
Okay, it's not like new.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (29:20):
And there was a rise since 2018, 182 increase in rise
of homelessness since 2018.

Speaker 1 (29:28):
I also did hear, and you can let me know if this is
true but I also heard that thereason not the reason, but part
of why we're seeing an increasein this domestic violence is
because of the housing shortageand literally women are like I
have literally nowhere to go.
They don't.
So they basically just sufferit out, yeah Well and then we're

(29:52):
the poverty, the rates ofpoverty in Nova.

Speaker 3 (29:55):
Scotia is so high and our minimum wage is one of the
lowest in Canada.

Speaker 4 (29:59):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (29:59):
There there's no means to get out.
Um, and we're seeing theincrease because women and men
are now having to work to beable to make the basic needs.
And then our men are strugglingand not having mental health
support.
They're weighing the world ontheir shoulders.
They have nowhere to let thatanger out, let that frustration,
and you guys weren't taught howto deal with your emotions.

(30:23):
You're told to man up.

Speaker 2 (30:24):
Wipe away your tears, no crying.
Yeah, I mean I think it's alittle bit easier now.
I think parenting today is notas man up as it might have been,
and even my generation orgeneration definitely generation
before me.
But look at the people that areharming women.

Speaker 3 (30:37):
The statistics right now.
How many older generations aredying?
It's not something that you'relike 22 year olds, it's the 87
year olds, it's the 67 year olds.

Speaker 1 (30:49):
Yeah, that's what I was going to say.
Like, when you look at a lot ofthe so the domestic violence
cases are higher.

Speaker 2 (30:54):
older, older people yeah.

Speaker 1 (30:56):
Like 40 and up kind of thing.

Speaker 2 (30:58):
Oh, wow, okay, so it is, it is.

Speaker 1 (31:01):
It is like who, our generation, where basically it
was like you're not allowed tohave emotions outside of
happiness and anger, and sowhere are you releasing that?

Speaker 3 (31:13):
You're taking that home.
You're stressed about bills.
You're stressed about yourmortgage.
You're stressed that you can'tbuy a house and you're paying
$2,100 for a two-bedroomapartment.
You can't make your car payment.
You can't take care of yourchildren.
Your children are being takenfrom you because you meet the
poverty line and you can'tsupport them.
So where does that all comefrom?

(31:34):
That's anger, and we don't havehealthy coping strategies for
them.
So that's it's kind of theproblem.
And if we're not, it's okay.

Speaker 2 (31:44):
No problem.

Speaker 4 (31:45):
I'm getting over a little bit of pneumonia.

Speaker 2 (31:47):
Oh, okay, just don't share it.
No, it's not contagious, you'refine.

Speaker 3 (31:52):
So I think that's we need to be talking early
intervention rather than being areactive approach, it's a
proactive approach.

Speaker 1 (32:01):
Do you see it like just based on generational like
kind of stuff?
Generational trauma well, no,well, there's that too.
But I mean, like, with it beingthe plus 40, like, do we see
anything in terms of like, oh,there's hope, because these kids
who are 25, because they'regrowing up in that home.
Okay, they don't know differentyeah, so they're growing up with
the 45 year old.

(32:21):
So, yeah, they're going up withthe 45 year old, yes, so yeah,
they're going up with the 45year old.
Who is passing on that,whatever mentality that they
have.

Speaker 3 (32:30):
The learned behavior, the trauma, the exposure, the
acceptable behaviors and we'renot talking about healthy
relationships at when kids areyoung.

Speaker 4 (32:39):
We need to introduce what that is.
So when they go home andthey're like, maybe this isn't,
maybe what my mom and dadalthough they love me and they
care about me, maybe this isn'thealthy, maybe and challenge
that thought process, justbecause you see your mom and dad
fight and argue doesn't mean ithas to be the same for you.
But when you see that andthat's all you know that's what

(33:00):
a relationship is.

Speaker 3 (33:02):
How do you do it?

Speaker 2 (33:02):
different yeah.

Speaker 4 (33:03):
Children learn by what they see.
And that's when they see thatday in and day out it's so
normalized they don't even thinkdifferently about it, which is
really sad.

Speaker 3 (33:12):
Scary so if we talk about the mass casualty that
happened.
There was a mass casualtyreport completed and in that
mass casualty report it talksabout, like a proactive approach
, our RCMP, our communityorganizations, more
community-based non-for-profitsworking with the community and
being there before thingshappened, rather than responding

(33:34):
to a murder and amurder-suicide who were there
before.

Speaker 2 (33:40):
Yeah, all those incidents that were reported to
police about you know there wasa lot of signs that that guy was
a bit wacky.
Yeah, I mean, you know, justput it gently.

Speaker 3 (33:49):
He struggled and not to dismiss the families that
have been affected by it,because I wasn't here and I
can't imagine how they felt.

Speaker 2 (33:58):
However, First step I'm making a police car, yeah.

Speaker 3 (34:02):
Why that's trauma he and the report indicated that he
had significant generationaltrauma and he had parents.
He grew up.
There was a lot of domesticviolence calls.

Speaker 2 (34:14):
But I think, you know , I think in his case I don't
think I think his level ofsuccess, uh, probably made him a
little less looked at.

Speaker 1 (34:22):
Yeah, absolutely yeah , that's the thing.
Yeah, respectable,quote-unquote, unquote business
man.
Professional.

Speaker 2 (34:27):
Business man.

Speaker 1 (34:27):
Professional community.

Speaker 3 (34:28):
Well, and I think, it highlights the intimate partner
violence, the RCMP officersthat have killed their wives and
then killed themselves just inrecent.
They're members of thecommunity.
We're not looking at the peoplethat could be struggling.

Speaker 1 (34:44):
Right.
They're in high demand job Ithink that's an important thing
to also highlight because, um,when you look at the um abuse,
spousal abuse and so, oddlyenough, police officers actually
tend to really lead thatcategory.
Yeah, and I think that issomething that where you're kind

(35:06):
of hitting the nail on the headis the amount of trauma that
police officers are probably thethings that they see every day
and all that and they're justtaking it home 100%.

Speaker 3 (35:17):
Not talking about it, shoving it down.

Speaker 1 (35:20):
So they're just shoveling it down and it turns
around to not being emotionallyintelligent enough to to handle
the healthy way absolutely yeah,and they're not being taught it
so how?

Speaker 3 (35:33):
how do you change that?

Speaker 2 (35:34):
yeah, um well, I mean .
I mean the thing is is I thinka lot of men don't take the
first steps in trying to figurethemselves out when they face
problems or dilemmas and stuffso where would you go?

Speaker 3 (35:45):
where would you go?

Speaker 2 (35:46):
Where would you go, your doctor?

Speaker 3 (35:48):
So you're going to go to your family doctor, you
could go to your physician.
And what are you going to do?

Speaker 2 (35:53):
Well, I mean, you know, I mean you would just tell
them I'm having weird feelings,thoughts, whatever, and ask to
be put with someone right, Not apsychiatrist, Then typically
that's a four to six months waitlist Right Four to six months.

Speaker 1 (36:06):
Yes, Well, you know you went through the.

Speaker 2 (36:12):
ADHD thing.
I went through the ADHD thingjust recently because 18 months,
yeah, I waited.
You don't want to actuallyshorter?
Oh, you're on a list.

Speaker 3 (36:17):
Significantly shorter I just got my like.

Speaker 1 (36:20):
I went and asked for it in April and I'm getting it
in my test on October.

Speaker 3 (36:24):
You're in Halifax.

Speaker 1 (36:24):
Yeah, I'm in Halifax so.

Speaker 2 (36:27):
I was about six months away too, yeah, and I
mean, from there it was prettyquick once you got the test and
the diagnosis was super fast andand uh.
But you know, it is so funnybecause as as a guy, you're just
like you start to wonder, likeright now I'm at a stage where
it's like, do I want to take youknow drugs for this right, or
or do I not want to take drugsfor this and try to just get any
kind of cognitive behavioraltherapy in natural ways, like I

(36:50):
mean, I find dialecticalbehavioral therapy pardon me
dialectical, dialectical,dialectical behavioral therapy
okay, dialectical, dialectical,dialectical dbt

Speaker 1 (37:02):
I don't know to be fair, though, even though it may
be six months, like, like youknow for that in Halifax, I
think it's still six months oflike potential abuse, and things
like that.

Speaker 2 (37:11):
Well, yeah, if you look at that abuse situation,
six months is a pretty scarywindow, right Like if really
don't.
I mean, I love the fact thatyou're putting me and asking me
this, because I really don't.
These are good, right?
So?

Speaker 1 (37:30):
Also.
It's helping me also andhopefully you too is like
helping me realize like we havea really good core group of
friends.

Speaker 4 (37:37):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (37:37):
Like there's four of us that are really, really tight
.
You know, we've known eachother for 20 years or more and
you know we're all dads, we'rewe just we're all career
professionals, but we're in thesame, we're in the same world.
Right, and the good thing is isthe privilege that I have is
like I don't really have thatlike need to, like I don't feel

(38:00):
like I need to get that, likethat stuff out, or I'm like I'm
not holding onto something, andif I did, maybe it's because I
don't, it's because I can talkto him about what's frustrating
me.

Speaker 2 (38:08):
We talk to our friends, the four of us, right,
we are like I mean our friendgroup is highly and my
communication with my partner, Imean I tell her everything I'm
thinking and she tells me whatshe's thinking.
I don't, we don't like really,I even tell her, like when I and
like you know, a fun week thingis like we had to go see my
family on the weekend, but therewas a lot going on.
You know one of those dayswhere, okay, everybody wants us

(38:29):
to be everywhere and we, youknow, sometimes we divide and
conquer.
But this is one of those dayswhere I was like no, babe, I
really think it's important wego see everybody today and make
it work for everyone, becauseeveryone's important.
I don't want anyone to feel atthe end of the day, that they're
less important than the otherpeople.
So let's just suck it up and doit all.

Speaker 3 (38:44):
And that's our business model right there.

Speaker 2 (38:46):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 3 (38:47):
Okay.

Speaker 2 (38:48):
Because I felt, you know, because you feel, I mean,
I went from happy to almostangry in a moment because I'm
like, well, you know, one personis not less important than the
other person.
I, you know, want to defendeverybody, and you know these
talk about this.
We, we can, you know, even, youknow we can cool down, we can

(39:08):
kind of just get through this,but I'm a big communicator,
right and what if you didn'thave that?

Speaker 4 (39:12):
yeah, I don't know, right, so many people don't have
those 20 year old friendshipswhere 20 year old friendships,
10 year old partners.

Speaker 2 (39:19):
That I mean you know.
I mean yeah, that you canreally rely on to have a
conversation with open andhonest.

Speaker 4 (39:23):
so and honest so many people feel like they have to
put on this front for theirpartner or their friends because
they don't have that history.
A new friendship.
Right Like, how hard is it tomake friends in your 40s,
especially if you come to a newcommunity?
And these are tight-knitcommunities in Nova Scotia.

Speaker 1 (39:39):
Sure yeah.

Speaker 4 (39:40):
There's just generations of people living
there.

Speaker 2 (39:42):
So coming into that situation, so I got to ask you
what does a guy do and when?

Speaker 3 (39:47):
you're like working in a professional field such as
RCMP, or a doctor or a nurse orany of those fields.
You can't go out and talk aboutsomething like it's
confidentiality.

Speaker 1 (39:58):
Right.

Speaker 3 (39:59):
So I can't just go home and talk to my spouse about
what I seen, because I can'tlike confidentiality, so they're
building it up.

Speaker 2 (40:05):
Well, don't they have therapists that like within the
, within the organizations, likethose are the RCMP have like an
RCMP?

Speaker 3 (40:11):
person that talks to them?
I believe so, but I think itwould be really hard to admit
that you're struggling, becausethen you're off.

Speaker 1 (40:17):
This is where I think we're like in this day and age,
where people are confused withthe difference between
masculinity and toxicmasculinity.
People are confused with thedifference between masculinity
and toxic masculinity.
Yes, there's nothing wrong withbeing masculine and masculine
things.
Where it's toxic is when you,it's like, be a man and suck it
up.
Yes, that's where it becomestoxic.

(40:37):
Are people really saying that?

Speaker 2 (40:38):
anymore yes, Like yeah, yeah, I mean I just don't
feel like that's a Dude.
Andrew Tate says it on everysingle time he talks.

Speaker 1 (40:45):
He's an idiot.
He is an idiot, but he hasmillions of people following him
.

Speaker 2 (40:50):
He's a serious problem and I won't debate that.
But I don't think that, like Ithink that I don't know I just
do give Ben a lot of creditthese days that most men aren't
thinking like Andrew Tate.
I don't think they are, butmaybe I'm wrong.

Speaker 3 (41:04):
They have to be at some point.

Speaker 2 (41:06):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (41:06):
Because why are they following?
Yeah, that's the thing.
He has millions of followers.

Speaker 2 (41:10):
It's scary for adolescents, I'll tell you that
that's where it's the most scaryto me, yeah, to see adolescent
boys thinking that guy's somesort of fucking hero.

Speaker 4 (41:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (41:17):
Excuse my language, but I.
Nothing could make me angrier,because there's nothing further
from the truth.
That's the worst type of humanbeing you could possibly be.
Yeah, right, in this universe.
Right, there's no question.

Speaker 4 (41:31):
Definitely not someone we want our children to
look up to, for sure.

Speaker 2 (41:35):
So yeah, I mean, yeah , it's scary to see adolescents
just look up to like someonelike that, but they feel that
they don't have other rolemodels.
Why do you think the kids dothat?
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (41:44):
A lot of kids don't have dads in the picture as well
, so they see this guy withmillions of followers.
They want that quick buck andhe's rich and he's famous and he
can say whatever he wants andno one really bats an eye.
Honestly, Like there's been afew little things he's been
arrested and stuff.

Speaker 2 (42:02):
He's been in jail for human trafficking.

Speaker 4 (42:04):
But that's not talked up as much as his other stuff.
You see all these clips of allthese things anti-feminism
things that he's saying andthese kids are listening to it
and gravitating and be like.
I want to be just like him.
It's like looking at Gretzky.
I was a hockey player.
I idolized Gretzky.
Can you imagine if it wasAndrew Tate instead of Gretsky?

(42:24):
It's so easy to fall into thattrap and everything's on the
digital age.
Our kids are glued to theirtablets.
They're glued to phones.

Speaker 1 (42:32):
People aren't able to monitor exactly.

Speaker 4 (42:34):
And they're so smart they can get through parental
locks at the age of seven.
I pay my six-year-old my phone.
I'm like how do you do this?

Speaker 2 (42:46):
How do you keep packing the pass?
My kid found it in a mirror.

Speaker 1 (42:48):
She saw me putting it in and basically guessed the
passcode this actually goes toyour point about pornography,
and my wife and I have had thisdiscussion.
She's a teacher, so comes upsometimes Occasionally and I
only know my experiences.

Speaker 3 (43:05):
It's unrealistic.

Speaker 1 (43:06):
Well, well, but me growing up, well, no, I'm not,
I'm not even there.
Yet I'm not even talking aboutI'm not even talking about the
porn part yet.
I'm talking about my experienceof like just growing up as a
boy, right, and I know, and she,like her being a female and
whatever, she's kind of like, doseven-year-old boys like really
care about?
Like, yes, they do, yes, theydo, I can verify, yes, they do.
But the and she's always amazed.
She's kind of like doseven-year-old boys like really
care about?
Like, yes, they do, yes, theydo, I can verify, yes, they do.

(43:27):
But the and she's always amazed.
She's like what, my littlegrade threes?

Speaker 2 (43:31):
it's like, yeah, yeah , yeah, they do.
So it's pressure.

Speaker 1 (43:34):
They got probably older siblings and then they
older siblings, and you know Iwas when I was 78 years old.
I was trying to find the playboyor something like that we used
to find in the woods and treeforts with sticks like yes,
exactly yeah but here's thedifference, though, is like this
is the big difference betweentoday and back when I because I
was thinking, oh yeah, we usedto find that stuff, but I was
trying to steal, like thehustler, the playboy, which are

(43:56):
still pictures in magazines thatare probably freaking half
ripped and burnt or whateverversus you can go on porn hub
and get literally anything yeah,you can accidentally search
something and get literally pornall the time, and that could
probably scramble your brain too, of what?

Speaker 2 (44:16):
it does normal and what's what's good and what's
not for sure, and it alsocreates that narrative that you
have to be this type of personlike there's on Pornhub, there's
like the bondage and abuse ofpower.

Speaker 3 (44:29):
And then, like I seen a like an audio clip of um I'm
sleeping with my step mommy,like yeah yeah, that's some
fucked up shit like let's justpause and think about that.

Speaker 2 (44:42):
yeah, it is some messed up stuff, like and that's
almost a category now.

Speaker 3 (44:45):
Yes, right, yeah, or my step-sibling Sorry.

Speaker 4 (44:49):
That's wrong.
Or twins, yeah.
Sisters, yeah, what yeah?

Speaker 3 (44:59):
It's not healthy for our young boys or our young
girls to have this expectation.

Speaker 2 (45:01):
So in places like Texas they've banned Pornhub,
They've made it illegal.
Do you think that's a good stepfor around the world?

Speaker 4 (45:07):
A hundred percent, yeah, and how have they done?

Speaker 2 (45:09):
that?
How did they do that?

Speaker 3 (45:10):
They haven't really done that.

Speaker 1 (45:12):
So what they've done is they've blocked, you can get
VPNs, exactly yeah.

Speaker 2 (45:15):
They block IPs, but you can get around it quite
easily.
So there's probably tons ofpeople.
So trying though, yeah, forsure, the more you try the
harder it gets, like you know,the more you make something
blanket.
If that's you know, if we thinkthis will help correct society,
yeah, maybe it's not a bad ideabut I think you're onto
something yeah, I think that'scorrect.
Like your generation was lookingat photos and the playboy

(45:39):
calendars yeah, um or thescrambled satellite stations
like yeah, but I mean that stuffwas actually more probably, I
would say, dare I say, moreromantic or more normal than
what it is today.

Speaker 4 (45:51):
Right, it was a little bit more.
More glamorized, yeah, moreglamorized, except for the
Playboy Mansion.

Speaker 1 (45:55):
Yeah, oh, no there was a lot of toxic shit going on
there.

Speaker 4 (45:58):
That's for sure, but we didn't no, and were they
reading the articles, yeah.
Or were they looking at thepictures?
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:05):
Yeah, exactly no.
So there's a big difference, Ithink the accessibility and
what's able to get I mean, oneof my favorite comedians
actually talks about this, abouthow he talks about his
addiction to porn has gotten somuch that he's like I need to
find the most weird stuff.
He's like it needs to have anoctopus arm in it or something
like that.
But weird stuff, he's like itneeds to like to have an octopus

(46:26):
arm in it or something likethat, like that but it's.

Speaker 3 (46:28):
It's funny, but it's also true, it's really scary.

Speaker 1 (46:29):
We're like you get to a point where it's like I need
to find the the, the biggestkinkiest thing, because all this
stuff that's like way kinky islike normal to me now right.
Yeah, you're desensitized.
It's all normal to them, rightkind?

Speaker 3 (46:42):
of.
Yeah, it's like the feetpitchers the what the feet
pitchers.

Speaker 4 (46:46):
The feet pitchers.
I never understood that yeahokay.

Speaker 2 (46:50):
No, not a fan.
Yeah, I never understood that.
But yeah, I don't like feet.
I'm not a feet person.

Speaker 3 (47:00):
When I see feet I'm kind of like ew.
I do have nice feet them.

Speaker 2 (47:01):
I don't like it when people don't have socks on in my
house.
I'm weird about it.
I'm like I wish I had my footsocks on.

Speaker 4 (47:07):
She doesn't wear socks, she's in sandals in the
winter.

Speaker 3 (47:14):
There you go Anyway.

Speaker 2 (47:15):
so I guess, I'm the opposite of a foot person.

Speaker 3 (47:16):
I'm not a fan of feet either, but I just I'm not to
that OCD level.

Speaker 2 (47:23):
I'm a little OCD, it's okay.
She's OCD about other things,yeah that's fair.

Speaker 1 (47:27):
So, yeah, I think that's the generation.
There's some generationaldifferences that are happening
with the accessibility and I canonly imagine that with the
internet, trafficking and allthat is far more easy.
I know my wife and I when wehad our kid, we decided no
pictures at all.

(47:48):
Yeah, no pictures.
And I've had to write to familyto say who took a picture, take
that down, things like that.
We're at a point now where wedon't even really I don't send
pictures to anyone unless Itruly, truly trust them.

Speaker 3 (48:02):
Yeah absolutely.

Speaker 4 (48:03):
Because once you send it, they have it.

Speaker 1 (48:06):
You can't take that back and you don't know like all
the things that we see now liketaking superimposed images of
your kid, and with AI they canbasically make a child porn with
your kid by a picture fromFacebook and people think like
oh, you know what?
I only have like 800 friends andthey're all people I know.
Yeah, well, it's the people.
You know what?
I only have like 800 friendsand they're all people I know.
Yeah, well, it's the people youknow.

(48:27):
Most times it's the people youknow.
It's you know it's always likethe uncle or something or
whatever that you know did it,the teacher, the whatever, 100%,
and it's.
That's tough.
And even if it's not that they,I got like 2,100 friends on
Facebook.

(48:47):
Woof, that's a lot of predators.
I got sitting there.

Speaker 2 (48:52):
So what's the percentage?
What's?

Speaker 1 (48:53):
the chance.
It's like 1% to 2% of thepeople, 1% of the population,
yeah, so if you've got 200friends, I'm a low-key friend
person on Facebook.
So you've, got two people.

Speaker 2 (49:01):
So there's two bad people out there.

Speaker 1 (49:02):
There's two predators .
That's statistically speaking.
I'm going to find them tonight.
That's statistically speaking.
So the fact is you can sitthere and say, like, maybe,
maybe by some good graces thatyou actually found, all your
friends are the good people,okay.

Speaker 3 (49:15):
But then they share it, but then they could also
share it Exactly, and then thenext person shares it.
Yeah Right, it's never ending.

Speaker 1 (49:22):
So my kid's not online at all.
That's wonderful, that's cool,yeah, and we've gone through a
lot of the things about whetherwe're going to allow him to do
and all that stuff, and we'realso really really big about
consent too.
Love that Huge, huge, huge, andmy family's really supportive
of it, right.
It's like if an aunt or uncle,even my parents or whatever and

(49:45):
they say, hey, give me a hug,and he says, no, it's no.
Absolutely it's a no, it's a no.

Speaker 4 (49:49):
It's a full sentence.

Speaker 1 (49:50):
Exactly so.
It's like no, you say goodbye,you're polite, like whatever,
but if you don't want to give ahug, sure you have that body
autonomy, and that's the bestthing we feel that we can do for
a boy is to make sure heunderstands that.
Consent from start.

Speaker 3 (50:06):
And I think what else is important for him is when
he's told no he follows that.
It's not just for his body,it's for everyone's body.

Speaker 1 (50:15):
Well, and that's yes and that's what we're hoping he
understands.
And you know, we give you thatgrace.
You have to also give thatgrace 100% Right.

Speaker 2 (50:23):
So that's the idea.

Speaker 3 (50:24):
And it's early intervention, that's being
proactive rather than reactive.
Yeah, I'm talking about ourbody parts and calling them the
way they are.

Speaker 1 (50:33):
It's a penis, it's a vagina.
Yep.

Speaker 3 (50:34):
Those are okay words.
We don't need to call it acookie.
No, it's very inappropriate,honestly, yeah.

Speaker 1 (50:40):
Honestly yes, honestly, yes.
That sounds weird to me.

Speaker 3 (50:44):
It's disturbing.
Yeah, same Right.

Speaker 1 (50:49):
So at one point did we get to the point where we
just can't say normal words inthe English language.

Speaker 3 (50:55):
Well, I don't think we've ever.
I didn't grow up talking abouta penis or a vagina, no, that
wasn't talked about I do die.

Speaker 1 (51:07):
Yeah, it's always like a hoo-ha or the jj or the
birdie or whatever.

Speaker 3 (51:10):
the birds and the bees, yeah um, we don't, we
don't call it as it is um and soit becomes foreign yeah it's a
not something we talk about anda lot of people think it's like
a derogatory word.
Yeah, it's not.
Yeah, it's part of our anatomyexactly it's, and I think and
going into talking about anatomyand consent.
If we're talking to our youngerchildren, those that are in

(51:35):
foster care, those are that arevulnerable disability, poverty
we're teaching them the redsigns, like the red flags and of
human trafficking of intimatepartner violence um.

Speaker 1 (51:48):
We need to know those signs before it becomes an
issue so as someone who hasessentially seen behind the
curtain, like you're, you mustview the world so much different
than we do probably because,like, not just from an abuse
standpoint, but just because ofthe way you like, you obviously
probably see signs more than Iwould ever see.

(52:10):
Uh like, there's probablypeople and things like that that
you pick up on.
Uh, yeah I will.

Speaker 3 (52:16):
If I drive by something or see something, I am
the first to pull over, I willcall 911.
I don't hesitate, I will stop.
Recently I seen a personyelling and ran across the
street and almost I almost hitthem, so I immediately stopped.
I'm like are you okay?
Like do you need to meet me totake you somewhere safe?
And they're like no, I I'm um,I'm going here to this location,

(52:36):
I'm in a like a transitionhouse and I'm like okay, let's
get you there how do we getthere, like what are your names?

Speaker 1 (52:42):
and I gave my contact number and said call me anytime
, like, and I made sure thatperson wasn't there before I
left them, like they weren't inthe vicinity, so I was leaving
them safe and I I'm always onalert good for you, how and for
yourself, like how, goingthrough the addiction and and

(53:04):
knowing people are going throughit's like how well, I guess
it's a question for both of youreally, because how do you
manage less like wrestle withhaving this, like I don't know
how to rephrase it, but like,basically, you're, you almost
feel like it's like a saviorcomplex or something like that,
where you're trying to saveeveryone and it's hard to do.

Speaker 3 (53:26):
I want to, yeah, I want to save.
We're trying, but that's what.

Speaker 1 (53:30):
I mean, though, like how, knowing how I would be, you
know, it's like I want to helpeveryone, and when you can't, it
would that I would imagine wayon, because more you guys, more
than me, because you guys wentthrough things that I haven't
gone through, so I can sit thereand be like and like
la-di-da-di-da, like I'd like tohelp people, versus you know
what that person's going to gothrough tomorrow if you don't

(53:51):
help them today.

Speaker 3 (53:52):
I think it's.
It is survivor led.
It is we're looking at at in adifferent lens.
We're not looking at the lensthat someone has an experience,
so we see it in a differentframe.
If we're helping one person,that's enough for us.
Obviously we want to help asmany as we possibly can, but we

(54:16):
help that one person it leads toanother person and it's
planting that seed and we usehonesty.

Speaker 4 (54:21):
We're compassionate.
I tell them really how it is.
We call people out on theirshit.
We're like man, you need to getit together.
Yeah, you need to be able to dothis.
If you can't, let us know so wecan support you in that.
And at the end of the day, it'sup to that person whether they
want the help or not, but we letthem know.
It's 100 up to you.
Yeah, it won't hurt ourfeelings.

(54:42):
We will and we are here if youdo decide at some point that you
need the help.

Speaker 1 (54:47):
Well, yeah, and so you would really know, as being
a former addict, that, likepeople who are living in that
attic.

Speaker 3 (54:54):
She is an addict.

Speaker 1 (54:56):
Yeah, yeah, recovering addict.

Speaker 4 (54:58):
You're always an addict.
One's an addict, fair enough,yeah.

Speaker 1 (55:00):
So it's one of those things where you would know that
you have to be firm with themright.
Yeah, an addict will lie, cheatand steal to get what they want
right they need to they have.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (55:16):
And letting them know and letting them know my story.
I don't shy away from sharingmy story.
I let people know where I comefrom and there is an example of
resiliency and change my story.
I let people know where I comefrom and that there is an
example of resiliency and change.
You don't always need to be inthat life.
I did some pretty fuckingshitty things.
I was lucky to never get caught, as many of us are.

(55:38):
I think many of us have donethings that we could have went
to jail for, whether it be pettytheft or something silly.
I'm very firm on that, and sothere's no like I'm not better
than you.
You're not better than me right.

Speaker 2 (55:51):
We're on the same page, all the same people, and
we're all human beings.
We make mistakes, and justbecause you make a mistake
doesn't mean that that's themistake, that for your life
right you can change I love thatthis duetang is packed, packed
with great stuff, like enoughstuff that I would love to put
all of this on our website foryou folks, um and there.

(56:14):
So hopefully, when this episodecomes out, you can send me a, a
uh word file or whatever theycall pdf.
Yeah, I'll put this on there,tons of great stuff.
Um, you know, I wanted to goover kind of the conclusion page
, the last page, and I reallywant to get into our 10
questions right.
So I'm gonna I'm going to justkind of start these off and
you're going to help me out withthe end of them, okay?

Speaker 1 (56:35):
oh great, making a bit of fun I don't want to do
all the talking.

Speaker 2 (56:39):
I'm far too lazy.

Speaker 3 (56:40):
Empathy and education oh um, empathy comes from a
place of compassion, so ifyou're not showing empathy to
someone that is struggling,don't bother talking.

Speaker 2 (56:54):
Just keep walking.
Normalize these conversationsabout human trafficking.

Speaker 3 (56:57):
Yes, and education is power.
If we're not talking about it,we're not making a change.
Listening to survivors that'swhere the power comes from.
That's where the educationcomes from and being part of the
conversation.
Like you, men, right now you'retalking about your emotions and
your assessments, and that'snot common.

(57:18):
That's not something we see.

Speaker 2 (57:20):
I know we're uncommon dudes, but for real.

Speaker 4 (57:24):
this shows help real though this show is help.

Speaker 2 (57:26):
This show is a form of our therapy.

Speaker 4 (57:28):
Absolutely.

Speaker 2 (57:29):
I mean, really, if you want some good therapy,
sometimes, gentlemen out there,start a podcast.
Right, because start talking topeople and having honest
conversations and just put yourreal self out there.
Right, a hundred and tenpercent, because you will be so
surprised by the conversationsyou have if you're just yourself
and honest and real right andthat's why I love this
conversation, guys.
So thank you, yeah, um you,wendy no no coffee support

(57:55):
solutions.
What would you say aboutsupport solutions for your
organization, for organizationsthat do what you guys do?
What can?

Speaker 4 (58:01):
we do to help talk to people, talk about it.
Like jackson said, get the wordout there.
Um.
Be supportive.
Um, let them know, call themout on their shit.
Be real.
Um donate yeah, donate toorganizations.
Um, make a difference.
Um.
And you making that phone callsaying, I think my neighbor.
There's some really weirdthings happening.

(58:23):
She's leaving at night withsome older men.
She's coming back with feelingalmost drugged up in the morning
when I'm going out to have acall.
There's a tips line that youcan call and you can give them
the tips and they will reach outand they will investigate and
see if anything comes from it.

Speaker 1 (58:42):
On that.
Is there any quick tips thatyou can give people that might
not be so obvious that peoplecould look out for?

Speaker 3 (58:53):
Multiple cell phones, gifts, unknown gifts, amount of
money, isolation, not talkingto their family.
Another one is like if I'm withsomeone and I'm not able to
communicate for myself and I'mlooking for your direction, or
you're often seeing me withsomeone and I don't have control
, those, no eye contact, no eyecontact.

Speaker 2 (59:13):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (59:14):
Feeling like a shell of a person, like it's.
It takes everything out of you.
When you're trafficked, you'refelt like you're nothing.
You're worse than the mud onthe street, like you're nothing,
and you're worse than the mudon the street like you're
nothing, um, and you're notvaluable probably feel pretty
shitty.

Speaker 2 (59:27):
Yeah, I mean I think rock bottom's losing, you know
like a like getting laid off orsomething, but this is probably
far worse of a feeling I canonly imagine important to drive
that human trafficking.

Speaker 3 (59:40):
You can be sold multiple times a day right so I,
if I was to purchase a drug?
That's one sale, that's it.

Speaker 4 (59:46):
I'm like I can come back, but I can.

Speaker 3 (59:49):
I can be sold multiple times a day and they
can make up to $280 an hour formy service, even though I'm
providing it and they're justgetting that money.
So, it's an it's a never dyingsituation.

Speaker 2 (01:00:05):
Insane.
So next word advocate.
Did I say that word right, Matt?
Advocate, Pronounce it right.

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
Advocacy.
Non-for-profits are important.
Ngos are so vitally importantto our community.
Listening to the members of thecommunity is important
Listening to someone's story andadvocating for them and

(01:00:32):
believing them taking their word.
And I know some people lie andI get that, but there's a lot of
us that aren't and a lot of usare being misunderstood.
So advocate for them.
Recognize the signs for oursocial workers, rather than
saying, well, they're just beingbehavioral.
They're just acting out.

(01:00:54):
Where's that coming from?
Look at a different lens, takea different approach.

Speaker 2 (01:01:00):
Like you do with your kid.
I mean eventually, you're likewhy are they acting this way?

Speaker 3 (01:01:03):
every time we got to go to piano class.

Speaker 2 (01:01:05):
Right, yeah, or whatever.
Maybe there's somethingdifferent going on up there and
I think.

Speaker 3 (01:01:10):
Advocating for those that are less fortunate, like
vulnerable populations, arerefugees, are people that don't
have status.

Speaker 1 (01:01:21):
Are we seeing some sort of an increase in people
who are newcomers to Canada?
There's some statistics in thisbook about that actually yeah,
like minorities weredisproportionately affected,
which?

Speaker 4 (01:01:32):
is pretty gross On the Indigenous.

Speaker 2 (01:01:34):
African.

Speaker 4 (01:01:34):
Nova Scotians African .

Speaker 2 (01:01:36):
Nova Scotians.

Speaker 1 (01:01:37):
Yeah, and the missing and murdered Indigenous women.
I'm assuming that's obviously alarge Very much tied into
trafficking.

Speaker 2 (01:01:43):
Traffic?
I would imagine so.
Yes, 91% of victims know theirtrafficker.

Speaker 3 (01:01:46):
Yes, and 34% of them are intimate partner violence.

Speaker 4 (01:01:50):
And it's 54% 34%, 34% .
She knows it.

Speaker 2 (01:01:53):
She's got.
She knows the book I'm lookingat the numbers, she's not lying
and it takes time.

Speaker 4 (01:01:58):
Like people think that you're just taken off the
street and you're trafficked thenext day.
It can take years of buildingthat relationship between the
trafficker and the survivor inorder for them to trust them
enough to traffic them.
They get to know all your dirtylittle secrets and they hold
those over your head, theyblackmail you with that they
take images of you.

Speaker 1 (01:02:19):
Some of them we see online, right yeah, like where
it's like you know, kids they'llwhatever they screw up.

Speaker 3 (01:02:28):
Well, the ones that are like taking intimate photos
of themselves and then they'recommitting suicide because the
person that's asking for money,they don't have the money, just
happen.
I'm going to send it to yourparents.
I'm going to send it to yourteachers.
I've heard that.

Speaker 1 (01:02:40):
I read a story of the U?
S where they just was like$3,000 if you don't send it to
me in 45 minutes and that kid in45 minutes went from talking to
his mother.

Speaker 3 (01:02:48):
At one point she had to dust off the room to him
shooting himself in the head wehave a situation in Alberta that
just happened in his bedroom hehung himself and the parents
have a campaign going right nowto educate the community and
that leads me to this Having akid.

Speaker 4 (01:03:08):
Yeah, it's terrifying .

Speaker 2 (01:03:09):
One more point in this.
I mean that leads me from allthat is watch for red flags and
don't ignore your gut, right?
I mean that's a statement youhave in here.
That's really powerful.

Speaker 4 (01:03:18):
And trust your gut.
Your gut is rarely wrong, andif it is wrong at least you
tried yeah.
Like it would feel worse if youdidn't trust your gut and
something happened than trustingyour gut and nothing coming of
it at least at least they knowthey're aware.

Speaker 3 (01:03:33):
Um, they can know about the signs and everything
from that point, right so, and Ithink what's also important for
the listeners to know is novascotia is the highest rate of
human trafficking in Canada.
So the national rates is 1.4per 100,000 people.
Wow, nova Scotia is 8.6.
What?

Speaker 1 (01:03:53):
Oh, no way.
I thought you were giving methe national number was the one
point 1.4.
So it's basically 8.6.
Eight and a half people forevery 100,000?
.

Speaker 4 (01:04:03):
Yes.

Speaker 1 (01:04:04):
See, this is what I mean by when you see behind the
curtain is how you see the worlddifferently, because I'm sure
there's people that you knowthat are involved in this stuff.
Absolutely that it would be.
Ugh, I don't know.
I think for me, I almostwouldn't want to see behind that
curtain because I think I wouldhave a hard time not turning

(01:04:28):
into Batman.

Speaker 4 (01:04:28):
Yeah, and that's what we're trying to become.
We are Batman, you guys areBatman, essentially, and the
next closest province to NovaScotia with the highest rate is
Ontario.
It's 2.6.
That's crazy gap.
Crazy gap.
And you think they have Toronto, they have Ottawa, the
population density too.

Speaker 2 (01:04:50):
There's a crazy variable between the two is like
there's a crazy variable.

Speaker 3 (01:04:52):
I think we're for the population of where the
smallest population is 2.4.
Yeah For all of Nova Scotia forthe population.

Speaker 2 (01:05:01):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:05:02):
Ontario makes up all that and we're higher than
Ontario.

Speaker 4 (01:05:06):
They have cities bigger than our province, so
yeah, I mean your closingmessage here.

Speaker 2 (01:05:11):
I mean, human trafficking is not a fairway
problem, it's here.
It's in our towns, ourneighborhoods, sometimes hidden
in plain sight.
The more we learn, the more wecan build a community where no
one falls through the cracks.
That's powerful shit.

Speaker 3 (01:05:23):
Yeah, good yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:05:25):
Cheers to you guys.
Everything you guys do isincredibly awesome.
We're going to get into somedumb questions here now.

Speaker 1 (01:05:30):
Now we lighten things up a little bit.

Speaker 2 (01:05:31):
We're going to try to lighten things up a bit.
But, guys, if you're listeningto this show still, we're going
to put a special on.
Put everything in this duotang.
We'll be on our website andI'll stop saying the word
duotang now.
I promise.

Speaker 3 (01:05:44):
It's purple Purple duotang.
It's purple, Cool Well.

Speaker 2 (01:05:50):
I mean I thank you guys so much for going on.

Speaker 3 (01:05:52):
You can take this oh okay, cool, all right, cool.

Speaker 2 (01:05:55):
Well, I could just probably copy that with the
picture thing and copy.

Speaker 3 (01:05:58):
Maybe it's just easier for me to send it to you
or just send it to us, I think.

Speaker 2 (01:06:01):
Yeah, okay, cool, all right.

Speaker 1 (01:06:03):
Getting into the next bit here now.

Speaker 2 (01:06:08):
We're going to find our 10 questions.
I got to read is so stupid andlight.
This will be a complete palatecleanse from everything we've
asked.
Some of these are actually backrelated to what you're here for
today, though, too, so it's abit of a mix.

Speaker 1 (01:06:19):
But not the first question.
Why don't you ask the firstquestion?
So it's for Wendy.
We're throwing this up to you.
This is a law ball.
Which is the better fast foodchoice, Wendy's or Dairy Queen?

Speaker 4 (01:06:34):
Do you only say that because my name is Wendy?

Speaker 1 (01:06:36):
Totally, totally where the fish came from Dairy
Queen.
Oh.

Speaker 3 (01:06:41):
Oh, she used to work for McDonald's and she used to
be told your name is notactually Wendy.

Speaker 2 (01:06:45):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:06:47):
So then I'd lie and say my last name is McDonald's
and then I worked at Wendy's andthey're like your name's not
really Wendy.
It was a vicious cycle.

Speaker 1 (01:06:52):
Yeah, I just disagree .
Bacon eater's the best.
That's the fighting word.
I like that Dairy Queen commawhere you get the ice cream with
the meal.
I just love ice cream.

Speaker 2 (01:07:03):
Yeah, like you get a sundae with your burger and your
fries.
It's just a good time.

Speaker 3 (01:07:06):
Full course meal.
I like the toss and saucechicken.

Speaker 2 (01:07:08):
Toss and sauce chicken strips Not bad.

Speaker 1 (01:07:10):
Dairy Queen does have the best chicken strips.
Chicken strips Not bad.
Dairy Queen does have the bestchicken strips.
That's true.
I will give you that.

Speaker 2 (01:07:14):
Okay, jacqueline, what is one goal or New Year's
resolution that you've made toyourself but had a hard time
committing to?

Speaker 3 (01:07:22):
Quitting smoking.

Speaker 2 (01:07:23):
You're still smoking.

Speaker 3 (01:07:24):
Yeah, god, fucking sucks God.

Speaker 1 (01:07:28):
He struggles.
He gave up like five years agoand he's still struggling.

Speaker 2 (01:07:31):
I got my five year casino chip, or whatever you
call it.
Yeah, for quitting smoking.
I gave it up.
I had.
I was addicted to lozenges fortwo years after I quit smoking
like the lozenges.

Speaker 1 (01:07:40):
And now it's mint.

Speaker 2 (01:07:41):
And now you probably see me take some during this
episode.

Speaker 1 (01:07:43):
Yes, I did, just regular peppermints.
He goes to the dollar store andbuys like Costco, like versions
of mints.

Speaker 4 (01:07:53):
It's better than smoking.

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
And cheaper.

Speaker 4 (01:07:54):
I'm sure it's way cheaper.
I'm sure his dentist loves it.

Speaker 1 (01:07:57):
His dentist does not approve.

Speaker 2 (01:08:00):
I've already been lectured a few times.

Speaker 1 (01:08:02):
Alright, question number three.
So, Wendy, if the Earth wasflat, what do you think would
happen if you reached the edgeand kept going?

Speaker 3 (01:08:12):
The Earth is flat, oh gosh.

Speaker 2 (01:08:14):
Are we for real?
Come on, please don't lose allcredibility.
You've done so well.
I'm just kidding, no, I know,it's just easier.

Speaker 4 (01:08:23):
The Earth is not flat so I can't even fathom what the
answer is.
I think fall off into deepspace.

Speaker 2 (01:08:29):
There you go.
It's an imagination question.
There'll be a shark.

Speaker 3 (01:08:31):
There'll be a shark, yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:08:33):
No, there'll be a shark off the edge in deep space
, space, sharks Space sharks,that sounds pretty dope.

Speaker 4 (01:08:39):
I'm terrified and I don't know why I moved to a
province that has sharks.

Speaker 2 (01:08:42):
Oh.

Speaker 1 (01:08:44):
Space sharks.
That's a movie.

Speaker 2 (01:08:45):
Yep there you go All right Over to you with number
four.
Again, very stupid question.
If these toys came to life,what would win?
Okay, who would win a fightbetween the original Barbie doll
versus an original CabbagePatch kid, cabbage Patch?

Speaker 3 (01:09:00):
Cabbage Patch would ruin Barbie.
Yeah, do you see those muscleson that doll?
Yeah, it's like the index, likethe little sausage roll arms.

Speaker 1 (01:09:07):
Yeah yeah, they tear stuff up.
They've seen some shit yeahtheir eyes.
And They've seen some shit yeahtheir eyes and they're way more
intimidating looking.

Speaker 4 (01:09:14):
Their asses are tattooed.
Yeah, exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:09:17):
They, 100%.
They were like the dolls thatwent to Vietnam and came back.
Yes, 100%.

Speaker 2 (01:09:23):
You took us to this question already.
Number five, that's me.
Yeah, what are you doing?
Sorry, that was still myquestion.

Speaker 1 (01:09:29):
Wendy over here.

Speaker 4 (01:09:36):
So what's one thing that people could do to get a
mental health check?
Reach out.
There are lots of tests you cando online, but reach out to a
not-for-profit organization.
Reach out to mental health andaddictions.
Do what you can.
It is important to keep yourmental health in check, and do
it sooner than later.
If you start to feel likeyou're getting a little bit more
irritable, a little bit moreannoyed when you come home,
that's the time to check it out.
It's not the time when you justcan't take it anymore.

Speaker 2 (01:09:59):
Take responsibility and do it soon, exactly Before
it's too late, because then youmight be slipping, you might be
losing it.
Exactly.

Speaker 3 (01:10:05):
I also think it's important to say you're not
alone.
The person that you're callingalso struggled at some point
when the helping field doesn'tjust help people because they
like it.

Speaker 4 (01:10:18):
We don't we're not paid properly.

Speaker 3 (01:10:19):
Um, so we're we're not being paid right now, so, uh
, I think that speaks volume.

Speaker 2 (01:10:24):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:10:25):
So you're not alone and there's people that want to
help you.

Speaker 1 (01:10:30):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:10:32):
Yeah, okay, number six how can you see the signs of
addiction in yourselves andothers?

Speaker 3 (01:10:39):
this would be a better question we always joke
because we can tell what peopleare on yeah, we can tell by
their eyes, their behavior whichone yeah their reactions, their
bodies, body responses,financial trouble, lack of
communication, isolation,erratic behavior, pan-handling

(01:11:09):
and some of these symptoms werethe same for human trafficking.

Speaker 2 (01:11:11):
How do I identify signs On isolation?

Speaker 1 (01:11:13):
Isolation, yeah, isolation yeah centers were the
same for human trafficking howdo I identify signs On isolation
?
All right, so question numberseven.
This is for everybody.
Anyone can answer this one or?
Both technically yes.
So what was your most favoritemovie, TV show, movie and book?

Speaker 2 (01:11:34):
The X-Files.
No, no, no, no, it was justpick one.
Oh okay, you didn't write thatvery well.
You go for it if you just gotone you wanted to pick.
I wish this is an easy question.

Speaker 4 (01:11:46):
I always loved the X-Files.
Again, I'm I was born in the80s love.

Speaker 2 (01:11:50):
David Duchovny first.

Speaker 4 (01:11:51):
Loved David Duchovny First heartthrob.

Speaker 2 (01:11:54):
Loved Scully.

Speaker 4 (01:11:55):
Fair, I didn't like Scully.
They got in a relationship andthat was kind of the end of the
show for me as a child.
But I can remember going homeand putting on Fox on Friday
nights, being able to stay uppast my bedtime to watch the
X-Files, and it was very muchlike Mulder was someone who was
not part of the FBI.
He was very isolated.

(01:12:16):
He was kind of put down intothe basement because he had
these weird thoughts andfeelings and he said he was
abducted and his sister wasabducted.

Speaker 1 (01:12:26):
You'll have to go back and check our episode with
David Coveney no the paranormalinvestigator we had on Elliot
Van Dusen.

Speaker 2 (01:12:32):
Elliot Van Dusen.

Speaker 1 (01:12:33):
He was an RCMP officer and then took his RCMP
training to invest he's the reallife.

Speaker 2 (01:12:38):
Mulder real deal right here in the Maritimes,
right here nice time we had afun chat with him.
He's really cool.
Yeah, that's awesome so youhave.

Speaker 1 (01:12:46):
You have the list apparently so I don't know
everything.

Speaker 3 (01:12:51):
my favorite show would be Law Order, special
Victims Unit, olivia Benson.

Speaker 1 (01:12:55):
Okay, fair enough.

Speaker 3 (01:12:55):
Mariska.

Speaker 2 (01:12:56):
Hardigan Way to decompress Nod Fucking amazing
woman.

Speaker 3 (01:13:00):
I love her.
My all-time movie is Save theLast Dance.

Speaker 2 (01:13:04):
Julia Stiles Okay, it's a tough choice, those
dancing.
I don't think that dancing wasgreat.

Speaker 3 (01:13:10):
I got to be real with you when you see her dancing.
It's kind of Her little nosehip her hit to her nose when
Sean comes in.
That's like.

Speaker 2 (01:13:19):
You like that?
I love that.
Oh man, it's powerful.
We're not on the same planethere.

Speaker 4 (01:13:24):
I've never even seen that movie, I've seen that movie
.

Speaker 3 (01:13:27):
I didn't watch it.
My favorite book would have tobe the Hunger Games.

Speaker 2 (01:13:34):
Okay, I okay, I saw the movie.

Speaker 3 (01:13:35):
I love the movie, you should read the book.

Speaker 2 (01:13:37):
The book is better, the book's better yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:13:38):
You should never watch the movie.
I'm going to be honest with you.

Speaker 1 (01:13:41):
I'm never going to read the book why I hate reading
fiction.

Speaker 4 (01:13:44):
I appreciate your honesty.

Speaker 1 (01:13:46):
Yeah, I hate reading fiction I do.

Speaker 2 (01:13:55):
Only books I read are non-fiction.
I like biographies, yeah, butyeah, I'm gonna try to read a
fiction book this year.
It's been a while.
I'm a big non-fiction guy but Ithe what I have right now to
read next.
It's pretty nerdy, but it's.
It's like star wars after thelast jedi.
It's like what happened, likewhat happened to luke, because
because they made that movie andthen all of a sudden luke was
just this old guy in a hilldrinking like the breast milk of
some weird animal, yeah, andyou're like what the heck

(01:14:17):
happened to Luke?
Like he was, he was, he wentout.
He went out as a boss and Iwant to know.
So I'm going to read that.
That's going to be my onlyfiction book this year.
The rest will be nonfiction.

Speaker 3 (01:14:24):
I don't know if you asked about singers, but Celine
Dion she's pretty awesome.

Speaker 1 (01:14:35):
No, well, I'm going to tell you anyways, she is my
number one.
You know what I'm like.
I go back and forth Like is itCeline or is it Whitney?
That's the goat.

Speaker 3 (01:14:40):
No.

Speaker 1 (01:14:40):
I'm like back and forth.

Speaker 3 (01:14:42):
Whitney can't sing in French.

Speaker 2 (01:14:43):
Whitney has a wicked voice, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:14:47):
Is that a criteria?
I can, be like Celine can'tsing in German.

Speaker 2 (01:14:52):
I'm on team Whitney.
Her voice is crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:14:55):
We are in a province and we're in Canada that we have
two languages.
I understand that that shouldbe recognized.
My wife's from Quebec.
Good.

Speaker 1 (01:15:03):
Her favorite is lean.
Good it should be, but ear testI'm kind of like I don't know
no, or pink.

Speaker 3 (01:15:11):
Pink is another option.

Speaker 2 (01:15:12):
She's pretty awesome.
She's pretty awesome.
Pink's cool.

Speaker 1 (01:15:13):
She's awesome, she's pretty awesome.

Speaker 2 (01:15:15):
All right, ready for the last question, guys.
So this is a question for eachof you again what's one piece of
advice you were given thatyou'd like to pass on to others?
If you've given this advicefrom anyone at any point in your
life, you don't have to say whothat person is.

Speaker 4 (01:15:35):
Just the advice you were given and you thought it
was like that was impactful.
You've internalized it orwhatever.
Life doesn't always need to belike this.
It doesn't always need to bethis hard.
You can always change.
Um, you don't have to stay inthe same patterns, um, people
change at the end of the day andthat's okay yeah, people change
at the end of the day, that'sokay.

Speaker 3 (01:15:48):
I like that yeah, I like that's cool.
Yeah, I think the mostimpactful thing came from my
foster child.
He said when we sayconsequences, that sends a

(01:16:10):
signal to your brain that it'simmediate consequence, like
you're in trouble, you've donesomething wrong it's a negative
thing.
It's a negative aspect ratherthan like natural logical
consequences.
Rather they're negative orpositive.
Um so he said he's like mom.
Can you not call it aconsequence?
Can you call it a modificationto our day?

Speaker 1 (01:16:29):
so how old?

Speaker 3 (01:16:31):
is he.
He is 16 now.

Speaker 2 (01:16:33):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (01:16:34):
And we're about to adopt him.

Speaker 2 (01:16:35):
Oh awesome, oh, congratulations, thank you,
that's awesome.

Speaker 3 (01:16:38):
Uh, so everything in our life is a monica
modification to our day.
So, if it's we're doing anegative or a positive, or
something just needs to beshifted.

Speaker 2 (01:16:48):
That's very intelligent, very advanced
thinking.
I actually like that Future CEOup in there.

Speaker 3 (01:16:54):
There you go.
He's going to be something.

Speaker 4 (01:16:55):
Yeah Cool, he's a force to be reckoned with.

Speaker 3 (01:16:59):
You're telling me.
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:17:00):
Awesome, that's great advice.
I love that yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:17:02):
So modification to our day, rather than everything,
has to be a negative.

Speaker 2 (01:17:06):
So what's the website Together we?

Speaker 3 (01:17:09):
No Thriving Together, I told you.

Speaker 2 (01:17:11):
I got something wrong over and over again.
Thrivingtogether.

Speaker 4 (01:17:14):
It's spelled T-W-O.

Speaker 1 (01:17:17):
Yes.

Speaker 4 (01:17:18):
We'll have it on the fire.

Speaker 3 (01:17:19):
And we're on Facebook .

Speaker 2 (01:17:20):
You're on Facebook Cool.

Speaker 3 (01:17:22):
And we're 24 hours.
So when I say 24 hours likewe're by phone, you can call us
anytime, and then we're alsoopen holidays.

Speaker 2 (01:17:33):
Please, if you help these guys out, let us know, I
mean, if you donate, if you doanything to support them too.
This is so cool.
You guys are awesome.
I think you guys are realwarriors, real Batmans, yeah,
yeah, or Batwomens.

Speaker 1 (01:17:43):
Okay, cheers.

Speaker 2 (01:17:45):
Cheers, Great show guys Awesome.

Speaker 4 (01:17:48):
Bye.

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