June 17, 2025 • 55 mins
What happens when your entire worldview is built on fear? When every decision about what to wear, what to listen to, and even how to pray is dictated by others? Tonya knows this reality intimately, having grown up in a doomsday cult in Southern Alberta that prepared its members for an apocalypse that never came.
From the tender age of five, she was taught that everyone outside her religious community – her teachers, classmates, and friends – would perish when the end times arrived. She describes sitting in classrooms, looking around at peers she cared about, knowing they were all "marked for death" according to her family's beliefs. As a naturally sensitive and spiritually gifted child, this burden was particularly heavy, creating a profound disconnect between her innate connection to the natural world and the windowless buildings where she was told God resided.
The restrictions were particularly severe for women and girls. Tonya reveals how women weren't permitted to pray if men were present in the house, and if they needed to pray alone, they had to cover their heads with cloth to symbolize submission to male authority. At sixteen, the church attempted to arrange her marriage to someone she barely knew – after just one chaperoned date and a year of exchanging letters, she was expected to commit her life to this stranger.
When Tonya made the courageous decision to leave at eighteen, she lost nearly everything – her community, her identity, and most painfully, her family. Five of her six siblings remain in the cult, and she's had no contact with them for thirty years. The cult teaches that those who leave are "dead," effectively erasing their existence from the community's collective memory.
Despite these profound losses, Tonya has rebuilt her life on her own terms, reconnecting with the spiritual gifts she was forced to suppress as a child. Now a healer, ghost hunter, and author of the children's book "Whispers from the Farm," she helps others – particularly sensitive children – embrace their unique perceptions of the world without fear or shame.
Her story is a powerful testament to resilience and authenticity. As Tonya puts it: "Don't be scared to be weird. Just be authentically yourself... The right people will find you." For anyone struggling to break free from controlling relationships or ideologies, her journey offers both hope and a roadmap to reclaiming your true self.
Kimia Nejat of Kimia Nejat Realty
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Cheers, cheers, and welcome to the Afternoon Plenty.
I'm Mike Colby, I'm Matt Conrad, and who do we have with us
today?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Tanya Stifler.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Tanya, you've been here before.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
Yeah, so the last time that you were here, last
time we met, like were together,you stuck me in a tunnel
underneath a building that washaunted.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Yes, so welcome back.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
He survived, I so welcome back.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
He survived, I did survive, I was blindfolded and
had headphones on and, yeah, inthese creepy tunnels under the
city of Halifax.
So you are a returning guest.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah.
You should pause and just saylike that was not anything you
know, adult, it was for anexperiment to kind of get in
touch with spirits and stuff.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
It was a haunted ghost investigation.
It took us on Paranormalinvestigations, right you?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
guys, you blindfolded him and put earphones on him,
right, yeah, yeah, they did.
And then what was the purposeof that?
Again, I'm just trying toremember.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Because it was just static and you guys who were up
you, you know, not in thetunnels um were asking questions
to the ghosts in the buildingand I was, uh, saying the
answers that I was hearing,seeing how the questions matched
up with the answers some ofthem did pretty good some of
them wind up.
(01:19):
Weirdly weird, do you?
remember them calling my name,saying yes, yeah, yeah, yeah,
that was cool so so you're areturning guest, but we wanted
to have you back for a while now, because you said something in
that original podcast that wewere like, oh, you just dropped
it, really you dropped it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, just like no warning.
Just there you go.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
I grew up in a cult, yeah, and we were like holy shit
, yeah, and uh, you know thatwas.
It was like kind of a kind ofnot something you hear every day
, right, and uh, we talked aboutit after and we said, man, we
didn't really get much about hergrowing up in a cult which
seemed like a very maybe one ofthe most interesting things that
were said that that episodeyeah very much so and when we
(02:01):
had the chance we talked.
We were like man, we want, wantto get her back to talk about
this.
We want to really understandwhat you were going through,
what happened and all this what?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
brought you to here, but this was the great, this was
the perfect timing, and we canget into this a little bit later
, but we'll talk about your book, so this is kind of the perfect
time so we can save the bookstuff for the end to kind of
pitch that and all that um, andI got to read it today.
But so, uh, before we getstarted talking about your life
growing up, uh, I just want tosay thank you to the old number
(02:31):
seven.
We are out in jador on theeastern shore.
I am having a really, reallygreat tasty caesar, what do you
have in there, mike?
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I got the number seven draft they make here.
It's awesome.
All right, nice light beer, I'myou.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I actually don't know .
You surprised me.
You ordered a drink, you got aStrongbow cider, my friend, okay
.
Yeah, so there you go.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
It's 42%.
No just joking, I think it's alow alcohol.
Beer Ciders are what Usually?
6%, 5%, five.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Strongbow is 5%.
Yeah, that's a good thing,because I'm a lightweight.
Yeah, there you go, cool.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
And these are small beers.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Those are actually small beers, yeah so they
shouldn't cause too much trouble.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
And this is Friday the 13th.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Yes, it's a good day.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Creepy, spooky stuff, that's spooky a little louder
than usual.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
And it was just the strawberry full moon.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
There you go.
I have no idea what that means.
Sounds delicious.
Well, you know how, like themoon, has been read the last
reading, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
It's a strawberry full moon and Friday the 13th is
actually the day of the goddess.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
So it's been like kind of changed into a scary
thing, but it's actually a goodday, see, so I actually love
friday the 13th so does harryswift really that's true, yeah,
you and t swift got somethingmean swift, yeah, that's yeah
yeah, we both, they're bondingyou know, in 13, that's right
there you go all right let's geton.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
We're going to talk about cults, because this is the
most interesting thing that youcan talk about.
My wife loves that stuff reallyso yeah.
So let's get kind of rolling inhere I mean first off let's on
an elementary level.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
What is a culture?
Speaker 2 (04:10):
well, I mean, I think the definition would be kind of
different for a lot ofdifferent people, right?
So for me, what that woulddefine is something that really,
um, completely takes over yourentire life and your entire
mindset controls every aspect ofthat.
So what you eat, what you wear,what music you listen to
(04:33):
basically everything that wewould make normal choices over
is basically kind of likemandated by this church or this
organization, right?
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
So I grew up that way , like I had to dress a certain
way, I had to speak a certainway as a woman.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
And where was this?
I had to be subservientSouthern Alberta.
Southern Alberta Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Yeah, yeah.
So as a woman, it was evenharder.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Can you tell me exactly where in Southern
Alberta it was?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Well, it was very, very south.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
So I have to be careful because I have family.
All my family members are stillin, okay.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Yeah, I'm not part of it, and so I've been shunned.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
No respect then.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
Right, yeah, so I've had no communication with five
of my six siblings for probably30 years.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Yeah, of my six siblings for probably 30 years.
Wow, yeah, my nieces, mynephews nothing, no, and as far,
as you know, they're all stillinvolved with this.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Oh yeah, very much, so very, very much so my brother
um, who just passed.
He, him and I were the onlyones that had left and we're
both free thinkers, so it's likeat a very young age I knew
something wasn't right and he heis too like he was very
open-minded.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
So so you uh that's the thing I was gonna ask is
like what age did you really umkind of start to realize like
something's not right?
Speaker 2 (05:57):
well, honestly, it started really young.
Um, because I am very spiritualand I am very connected.
I tell the story that kind ofmy first time I realized
something wasn't connecting waswhen I was like a little girl,
probably about even like six,five, six years old, and I would
lay in the grass field and Iwould feel super connected to
(06:21):
everything, like I felt reallyconnected to everything around
me and part of it all.
And then my mom would say timefor time to go to church and
she'd bring me in the house, puta scratchy dress, tight shoes,
put me in a building and saythis is where we worship God and
I was like this feels soseparate from where I was, like
(06:41):
I felt so connected toeverything.
And now I feel in a buildingwith no windows and this man's
talking all this fear and doomand it felt it just didn't feel
right.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
It didn't feel right Characterize it as a doomsday
cult.
Yeah, so like what is it likein terms of like kind of like
the beliefs and stuff like that?
Was it like a like a Christiansect?
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Yeah, okay.
So I wasn't sure if it was likesomething like off of yeah,
okay, so yeah, fundamentalist.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Right.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Like really, you know , normal Christians would go to
church on Sunday and have someyou know tea and crackers after
and everything's great.
No, like we're preparing forthe end of the world.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
No, we were preparing for the end of the world, oh
yeah.
And what did they say aboutthat?
What was like?
I mean, as a kid, you rememberwhat were your bedtime stories
about?
Were they about the worldending Terror?
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So we were told everyone was going to die.
My teachers were going to die.
Everybody that I'd come across,my schoolmates, were all going
to die.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Was there a set date, we would be the only ones.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
There was a rough estimate, but it's all like in
God's time.
You know like, and then you'resupposed to watch for signs,
right?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
So I remember, so you were seeing teachers and all
that.
So you were not, you were notisolated, we weren't.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
You were still going to public school and stuff.
Right, we were in the world.
(08:30):
Okay, all right, sensitivechild and I'm, you know, really
soft-hearted and I'm seeing allthese people that I'm like, like
imagine sitting in a classroomand going.
Like all these people I careabout, that are my friends, are
all going to die any day, andhow old were you then at?
That time Five years old.
My gosh, like you're taughtthis soon, could you imagine?
Speaker 1 (08:38):
thinking about that as a six-year-old or a
five-year-old right, not justunicorns and things.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Yeah, over a firework , right?
Yeah, not just unicorns andthings.
Yeah, you should be playingwith barbies.
So they it was.
It was a lot of like, uhobviously like that kind of prep
type of stuff, uh, likeprepping yeah, armageddon um,
but like as far as you know,because I mean obviously cults
come with other weird thingsthat can happen like is there?
Was there anything else thatwas kind of going on like that?
(09:05):
That was just way out there,like I know.
Like you know, there's polygamystuff and all that other weird
stuff.
That kind of happens.
I know, I was in a a town lastyear.
I was in the summer yeah and Iwas in a place in northern
arizona like right on the borderof utah yeah and they had a
town where the the former mayor,okay used to run like a and all
(09:28):
the council was part of this.
Like cult.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Yeah, and it was a religious cult yeah anyway, he
went to jail in 2013 forbasically like child brides
right, yeah, so I don't know ifthere's anything like that there
there was, it wasn't.
It wasn't open in the way that,like that was part of the
teachings, but a lot of stuffwent on.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Like a lot of abuse went on yeah, physical abuse,
and it would happen in front ofeverybody.
I remember like little kidsbeside me wouldn't sit still for
the teachings, and justliterally in front of everybody
their parents like slapping themso hard they'd fall off their
chair.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
For not sitting still .
These kids are four.
How are they supposed to sitstill for two?
Speaker 3 (10:13):
three hours, oh, exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And everybody just sat there and allowed it to
happen, right?
So there was things like that.
There was basically a rule thatif, say, you were being
molested or some terrible thinglike that was happening, two
other people had to witness it.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
And things are dealt with in the church.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
So let's just say… it's not really a system of
justice.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
It 100% is it victimizes women and children a
lot, and I saw a lot of that andexperience.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So imagine you know your, youruncle, your dad, your brother's
doing something to you.
Two other people have to comeforward.
Speaker 1 (10:55):
You have to sit in there with your perpetrator
right in front of a bunch ofpanel of other men and you can
be a child, yeah absolutely yeah, and they kind of have their
own justice, which, when you,isn't really I mean, as a kid,
you probably brought home stuffthat was, you know, full of
happiness and sunlight, likebringing home.
Uh, you know, you hear about acharacter in school that's
(11:18):
popular like a mickey mouse typecharacter, you hear everybody
else and you start kind ofliving in a funner imagination.
Were you scolded out of that?
Or like what happened when youdid those normal things that
kids do, because they're always,you know, seem quite you know
manifesting their own happiness,in a sense, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
I'll tell you a story about the Smurfs.
Do you remember the Smurfs?
Oh, hell, yeah, that was odd initself.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
It was one like a thousand dudes in one woman's
smurf, yeah, which is kind ofweird, right, that's kind of
weird.
It's kind of an odd cult in itsown sense.
It kind of is.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But I remember I loved watching the smurfs right
Cartoons and I collected themand they were this fun toy.
And then a church mandate Iguess you could say they sent it
to all the churches tobasically tell everyone that the
Smurfs were demonic and thatthey basically that's Smurfing
(12:13):
Ridiculous, smurfing Ridiculous.
So Smurfing over the top, butyeah, so get all your Smurfs.
So I remember gathering all mySmurfs because they were telling
instances of Smurfs waking likestrangling kids in the night,
like really crazy shit, okay.
But like when you're in it, it'snormal.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Like you're on the shelf level terrifying that
there's things moving aroundyour house at night.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Yeah, and so we had to like burn it in the bird, all
the toys in the burning barrel,and I remember having night
terrors because I couldn't findone of the smurfs and I like,
but it's like, that's normal wowyeah, like on out of it you're
going, like that was crazy, butlike in it you're just like okay
that they are demonic, I mustfind them and burn them.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Were there even televisions in these, like where
you live in?
Speaker 2 (13:05):
like yeah, yeah yeah, there was tvs, but we, we could
only watch certain things rightyeah, and listen to certain
music and, um, like, as a female, we weren't allowed to pray if
there was a man in the house youweren't allowed to pray pray.
The man had to pray like so youknow like so you know, like you
(13:25):
pray over your meal.
you're having lunch, so let'ssay the man was upstairs in his
office and he couldn't come downand bless your meal.
We would have to wear like,let's just say, this is all I
had as a napkin.
I would have to put the napkinon my head to pray, to say or a
tablecloth or a rag, whatever torepresent my submission to the
(13:48):
male in the house.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Seems like humiliation, without even
realizing it.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
That's what I was wondering.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
So the origins of this cult do you know how it
happened, where this came from.
Was there a particular personthat kind of founded this
organization?
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Yeah, yeah, and then basically, um that, yeah, it's a
whole governing body.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
There's a whole lot of okay, yeah, like how old is
it like?
Was it something like it's likestarted in like 1968, or was it
?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
yeah, it fairly early on, like I would say early,
like it hasn't been around awhole long time I'd say probably
gosh, I don't even know like 50, 60 years, maybe enough, so it
was someone like fairly modernthat just decided like, hey,
we're separating from this yeahchristian church and going
further down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Yeah, further down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Yeah, further down the rabbit hole and a lot of,
like I said, the doomsday ofjust like world ending all the
time.
And oh, you notice there's alot of crows, there's a lot of
like carrion, that's, yeah, likebirds, because there's an
increase in that, because you'regoing to have to eat all the
dead bodies after God comes anddestroys the world.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
So you're always looking for signs and it's
really like and the thing thatpeople don't maybe understand
about being raised in that isthat it really, really affects
you the rest of your life.
There's a lot of poverty thatcomes with this, because you're
not allowed to have an educationpast high school they really
(15:22):
discourageage you.
So here you are.
Like you know I was.
I wanted to be an archeologist.
I know weird right, but that'swhat I wanted to do, and then,
no, you don't do that,especially as a woman.
So even when you leave this,you're not set up to succeed in
life and you're so shelteredthat when you go into the world
you're like this shiny thingthat's super naive and then you
(15:47):
attract kind of predators right.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
We know they can take advantage of it yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Because you just trust everybody and you're
Pollyanna out there and it'sjust it's.
It leads to a lot of trauma,actually.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
When did you leave?
How old were you when you gotout of this?
I?
Speaker 2 (16:01):
was 18.
I was 18.
I was pieced out, 18.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
And was that an age where you got the chance to make
a decision for yourself?
Or was it just I'm out?
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Well, they tried to marry me off at 16.
To somebody I didn't know, Wow,we had met at a big gathering
and he came over when I was 16.
My first like, oh, I like thisboy, right, and we over like I
was 16, my first like, oh, Ilike this boy.
And, uh, we had to bechaperoned all of the time.
Yep.
So my younger brotherchaperoned me.
We went to a movie.
(16:30):
We came home to my mom's houseeverybody was around.
The church leaders in my churchfound out about it and we were
not allowed to speak anymore.
We had to write letters for ayear and then, after the year,
we were assumed that now we'regoing to get married and I was
like I don't even know this dude.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
So you had a one-year pen pal marriage.
One-year pen pal marriage, oh,my dear God.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
So by then I'm like 17, 17 and a half and I'm just
like this is not for me.
Were they from the same, werethey?
Speaker 1 (17:05):
from the same like, like I want to say hood but I
don't know same area that youwere from or were they from
another area?
Speaker 2 (17:10):
They were from another city.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
So this, this cult, must've had other, like pockets
pockets in other areas?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah, is there a?
Speaker 1 (17:18):
name of this cult.
There again, I have to becareful, because I've got my
entire family in it.
I respect that.
It's hard.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Is it a situation where they recruit people or is
it a situation where people?
Speaker 1 (17:37):
are Sorry.
You're banging your hand on thetable, Is it?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
a situation where they there's a lot of
recruitment.
Let's just put it that way.
People can possibly start tomake connections to what I'm
talking about.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Yeah, so I mean there's recruitment, so I mean
it's….
Speaker 2 (17:55):
And the recruitment's quite… Like I remember being a
recruiter.
At a young age they would go.
You're cute little girls.
We're going to get you to go dothis and it would be things
like oh, they just lost this, oh, she's a widow, she just lost
her husband, so she's going tobe basically pride picking to be
(18:18):
recruited Right, right, right.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Wow, so they were bringing the people of different
ages and such as well, huh.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Yeah, I had dogs sicked on me.
I've had all sorts of stuffhappen when I tried to tell
people the truth and revert themand stuff, even at a young age.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
So would you have a book you'd go around with with
values or pamphlets, to kind of?
Speaker 2 (18:40):
explain your way yeah .
Speaker 3 (18:42):
Interesting to kind of explain your way.
Yeah, interesting.
I guess it's one of thosethings where, too, is like you
um, oh, this sounds like music'sstarting.
I thought they were going todelay that, but all right oh
well, either way we'll try tocarry on, guys.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
If not, we might have to uh reconvene, but we'll see
what's up yeah, we'll see what'sup there you go.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
All right, cool, all right.
It's one of those trying to getback to where we were, because
I completely lost track.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Now, guys, I think we've got to pause.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah, maybe, yeah, it's just going to be too
difficult.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
It is yeah hey there.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
So yeah, it got a little loud out in the main
floor.
Uh bands, a guy started playingand knew he was coming, but we
weren't sure what was going tohappen.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
And the place is full .
Yeah, the place is packed,literally full.
Right, it's a.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Friday night.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
The old number seven is a bumming place to go.
They got a lot going on outthere, right, so thanks to Will
for letting us go into his it'shis office.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
His office, his office down the office here.
We're in his office now in theback of the restaurant.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
We're shoulder to shoulder in this place, but it
works and people are probablythinking this is the best the
show has ever sounded.
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Probably so.
Thanks a lot.
Will Great sound.
Exactly, this is the best sound.
So, Matt, where we left off, wewere talking about cult
recruitment and all that stuffNot being able to be educated
and stuff like that right.
Yeah, lo that back into likehow hard it is to sell religion
to people yeah um, when theydon't feel they need it right
(20:30):
but you were saying about howthey you were recruiting like
old people and like people thatwe know?
Speaker 1 (20:35):
yeah, yeah.
Why would they recruit likeolder people?
What's the value?
Was it to take their money?
Speaker 2 (20:40):
well, not just older, but if anybody had a big loss.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Right, because, like, you're going to get people
looking for something, someanswers, some meaning something
when they're at their lowest.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Right.
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Right.
So when you hit people withsave your soul and like, oh my
God, you're going to go toheaven, and like this is, you
know all those story lines, whenthey're at their, their lowest
point, they are way moresusceptible, way more
susceptible to those types ofmessages yeah, and even, and
sometimes even like if they lostsomeone like really close to
(21:16):
them they're also just lookingfor that like meaning again in
their life andyou swoop in and tell them to
drink the kool-aid yeah and andlike I mean just meaning of life
, but they want to know thattheir loved one is okay.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Like oh, they're not just gone.
It's like no, they're actuallyin heaven and they're living
their best life, you know, eventhough they're dead.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
Yeah, but with that, though, that is something that
you have carried on through yourpost-cultish lifestyle.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Right.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
Right, because you still very much like connect
with the spiritual world.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
Yeah, and that's one thing I have to say I'm very
grateful for is that thatupbringing gave me the concept
of that?
There's something else.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Right, you were saying about how you're grateful
, about how that introduced yourspiritual Like the concept,
yeah, the concept ofspirituality, of other something
else, yeah, so yeah, I mean,and that's carried out
throughout my whole life,because it's kind of like the
matrix, what do you think?
Is it the blue?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
or the red pill, I don't know.
Yeah, it just, is it blue orred?
The matrix red.
Yeah, it's not even yourfavorite movie, you don't?
Speaker 1 (22:31):
know.
No, it's a red.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
All right cool.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
So once you take that red pill, there's no going back
, right?
So it did open up my mind toother worldly things as far as.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
I mean we kind of.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
I guess a little covered about how it reacts to
you going into the real world,but there must have always been
a part of you that never reallybought it if you were gone the
minute you could go.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, 100% Like.
I said like even so, I rememberbeing probably 10, 11 years old
and having to have a likeemergency meeting with the
elders because I was questioningthings that they couldn't
answer so things like okay, soyou're telling me that god is
love yeah, yeah that god he'slove yeah but yet in the bible
(23:28):
there's all these examples ofall these horrendous things,
going like soom and Gomorrah and, like you know, like lots of
wife turning to salt because sheturned around.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Right.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Like you know, stories of just slaughter and
because what you didn't believethem Like I, just it didn't make
sense.
Yeah, it didn't make sense.
I just it didn't make sense.
Yeah, it didn't make sense,Like as a mother.
Even now it even makes lesssense because there's nothing my
kids could do that would makeme not love them.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
There's literally nothing they could do.
They can murder people and Iwould still love them.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
You know what that kind of.
I won't talk about why it cameup up, but it kind of came up
today with somebody talking withsomebody else and we talked
about how, like there's nothingmy kid could do, and I said if
my, even if my kid turned out tobe a psychopath and killed
somebody, yeah, I wouldn't you,I wouldn't stop loving them, I
wouldn't stop like having arelationship with them.
(24:30):
Yeah, I would probably tellthem to plead guilty yeah and
take.
Take the lumps kind of.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
Thing yeah, I'll come visit you in jail, but uh, yeah
, I just, I could never, everimagine like not having a
relationship with like I wouldhelp them bury the bodies right,
I would, I would, but Iwouldn't stop loving them right,
exactly right so so think of meas a and this was my point at
10 years old, talking to likefour elders, four men that were
(24:59):
like my superiors, like itdoesn't make sense right because
love and god's capacity to lovewould be more than my capacity
as an imperfect human right.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
Exactly yeah, so god's capacity to love would be
more than my capacity as animperfect human right.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Exactly yeah, so god's capacity to love would be
so much greater than my capacity.
How can I find forgiveness, butgod can't find forgiveness?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
now, how did they react?
Did they?
Did your life get progressivelymore difficult?
Speaker 2 (25:23):
yeah, the thumbs start to come down on me a lot
harder yeah, so like in whatways what?
Happened uh, just even with thesituation with the boy I met,
like right, you know I was verysingled out pen pals only.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
And yeah, isolated, yeah, and always your dress.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Your skirts too short .
Who?
Speaker 1 (25:41):
knows, maybe they thought the marriage thing was
going to help tie you in closeryeah, keep you less of a problem
.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Yeah, a problem child but that didn't work.
Yeah, no, it didn't, no because, like you said, there was
always a part of me that just itdidn't answer the things I
needed.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
answered you must have had friends growing up,
though, even in this group.
Like how you know, how do youremember them or how do you miss
them, or family and like youknow?
Do you know of anybody that youknow got out?
Speaker 2 (26:12):
I know you said your siblings all stayed in except
for one brother.
Yeah, one friend reached out tome and we've talked, we keep in
contact.
But imagine, at 18 years oldyou decide you're not going to
go to this church anymore andthat means you will say goodbye
forever your community yourfriends, your family, everything
(26:37):
.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Your identity is gone , everything's gone.
Very well, right, like you musthave changed your name or some
extreme.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
No, I didn't, but I was dead.
Yeah, like that version of meis dead when.
I left, and rightly so.
Like they said you're dead,you're dead to us.
Wow, you're dead, you're deadto us.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Wow, you're dead, so can you, can you like?
Could you ever go back like,like you say, you're like uh,
you know what, I'm back in, likeI'm I'm I've come around, I'd
have to jump through.
It would be insane like that'sthe thing is like I wonder you
know because, because they'reconstantly recruiting, I'm just
wondering if they likere-recruit.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
I think I'm too far gone, Like I mean, I've come out
as a witch, I've like I'm aghost hunter, Like I'm so far
gone.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
No, I don't even think that there's anything.
I'm just saying, like Otherpeople, yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
Yeah, they've kind of gone back or whatever kind of
thing.
Public right, like?
I'm a content creator, I've gotmillions of views on tiktok, I
I'm so out there in public eyethat I mean maybe that'd be a
feather in their cap to be likeoh well, that's a thing, right,
if you look at like um, the, the, I mean, I mean totally
different thing, but the mormon,uh, the mormon shows there, the
mormon housewife shows that aretaking on the, the wives.
Speaker 1 (27:49):
Yeah, we can't go everywhere I go, so it tells you
about how amazing that show is,and I'm like how great is that
for the mormons, in a sense, tohave all these people paying
their attention to the religionfor a moment like yeah think
about it in in a different way,yeah right, positive or negative
, they don't know the otherstuff well the thing is, though,
is I mean like, when you reallythink about that.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
It's like are they aware of what it's doing?
Because I mean, on one hand,maybe they think it's positive,
but a lot of people don't.
They watch it because.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
It's crazy town.
Yeah, they're judging.
We're watching it for theanarchy.
Yeah, they're judgingthemselves right.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
We talked about this with our guests last week and
everything about how petty andcatty and not very Christian.
Yeah, everything about how, how?
Speaker 2 (28:36):
petty and catty and yeah not very.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
Uh, christian, yeah, very, you know hypocritical that
they, yeah, you, you see theyare, and I mean they must watch
the shows and then go like, wow,I'm coming across real shitty,
right, I mean, you think, youthink but, like you're thinking
it from your mindset yeah, yeah,well like if you're thinking of
it from somebody who's in that?
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
Like I burnt Smurfs because I thought they were
going to choke me out in thenight, right, right.
When you're in it, your braindoesn't operate the same way.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Oh, that's true.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
And these are things I've really started to unpack
within myself is like how it'saffected my relationships.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Right pack within myself is like how it's affected
my relationships.
Yeah right, because I haveattachment problems, because I
think there's part of me thinkswell, you're, you're gonna die
anyway, like, or you're gonnaleave or whatever, like, so it's
affected my bonding issuesbecause everybody's gonna die
right and you're taught that,even like your old family
members, that in it could stillnot be good enough that they,
(29:35):
you, could be tested in the timeof the end, where you have to
watch your mother be killed infront of you and you have to
have the choice of whether toconvert, I mean whether to give
it, give it up or not to saveyour mother.
What are you going to do?
Speaker 3 (29:51):
Right Like.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
these are the things you're taught as a kid.
You know Crazy, so that doesaffect you.
So there's the poverty, there'sthe fact that you go into a
world you're not prepared for atall and you become a target.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
Are there any support systems at all, like when you?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
Well, I'm part of groups like survivors groups,
and so we do support each otherand talk and share things and
and so within ourselves,informally, there's definitely
support and and you do have to,you do have to seek help yeah,
yeah because it affects onlyaspects of your life, yeah
Speaker 3 (30:28):
it's just, it's such a thing that like we, that like
you, and I say mike, I mean I, Imean I grew up catholic and
some people, to some peoplethat's a cult, but I would argue
it's very much not I mean asmuch as they have religious
beliefs and things like that.
It's also the largest charity inthe world.
Yeah, um, I'm since elapsedcatholic for lots of reasons
(30:49):
that we don't need to get intoright now, but um it, uh, it's
one of those things where, frompeople like you and I look on
the outside and talking to somany people and everything,
there's things that you don'teven realize.
Yeah, so, for example, I was ata work function years ago and
(31:10):
how we start this show would bea problem for that guy.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
We started the show with the cheers cheers with
cheers and it was.
Speaker 3 (31:19):
I remember we had this work function and I we like
that particular person was hada beer, they drank beer and I
was like cheers bud and he'slike I don't do that and I was
like, oh, um, probably why.
It's like that's really.
You know.
I was like cheers bud and hewas like I don't do that and I
was like, oh, probably why.
I was like that's really youknow.
(31:39):
I was like do you hate me?
Like, and he was, and he justlooked at me and was like, well,
do you like actually, likeseriously want to know?
I was like, yes, I'm actuallygenuinely curious why you won't
cheers me, and he was like justpart of his beliefs.
Won't cheers me, and he waslike just part of his beliefs.
He was a part of a particularreligion that believes that when
you cheers, you are essentiallysummoning spirits like the the
(32:00):
goodwill of spirits or whateverit may be like you're summoning
whatever I see and you are notsupposed to dabble with spirits
at all period and story yeah, sonot, not even like in good
intentions kind of thing.
So he doesn't do that at allkind of thing, right, but that's
something that's so likeingrained, and even after he
told me that, I tried to makesure I remembered.
(32:20):
Yeah, uh, because I spent a lotof time with him, because he
was a colleague um, and I try toremember, but I still remember
there was one time where I wentI caught myself.
I was like, yeah, the guy nextto me cheers bud bud and I went,
uh, yep, yeah, you know what Imean.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Yeah, but those are things like guys like us would
know, right, yeah, yeah, well,yeah, because it's like even
like the Catholic Church was onethat my particular sect
despised.
Yeah, because a lot of thestuff is pagan.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
That, yeah Right, because a lot of the stuff is
pagan yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Right yeah so yeah, Exactly yes.
So it's really it's all aboutfear.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
I think at the end of the day, that's what I knew
wasn't right.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
That little voice inside me as a little girl was
just like I can't walk throughthe world, I can't carry my life
on based out of fear.
Speaker 1 (33:13):
Right yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Because it's so dark, it's so like.
It's just not the way I want tomove through.
The world is is based in fearand gloom and death and trauma
and like it's hard enough.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Yeah.
Like life's hard enough so likegetting on to like years later
now.
Yeah, I mean's hard enough.
So like getting on to likeyears later now.
Yeah, I mean, you know you'vegone out of this thing.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Congratulations Right For that, and you've had a good
life You've raised childrenYou've you know you've became a
mom.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
You've done a lot of wonderful things.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
You hunted ghosts and you have a healing business.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Yeah, you have a healing business, okay.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
But so I guess now it's coming to a point where
you're, you know you must of me.
Now is the time for me to dothis, to share those stories.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
This book is based.
It does touch on the cult morein the way of because it's a
children's book, right?
So it touches it more as a wayof being a sensitive, gifted
child and because of the church,the cult, it suppressed my
natural gifts and so it's thosestories about how, basically, I
(34:39):
had to suppress things and thenhow I came back into bringing
those back into my life.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
So was the theme of the book like letting go of
those suppressions, or how wereyou teaching through the book
like letting go of thosesuppressions, or how are?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
you teaching through the book?
Yeah, so basically, I wanted towrite the book because I wanted
to help kids like me, kids whodo experience, because I did
experience the spirit world whenI was a kid and I got asked
like how are they going to findthis book?
Speaker 1 (35:05):
Because I mean obviously the places that
protect it.
You know are going to keep itaway from them, right, if they
want to figure this out, like,are you going to try to get in
public libraries, or what's likethis?
Speaker 2 (35:13):
yeah, that's my next step is libraries, bookstores,
right now it's, you know,available on amazon and my
publisher's uh website, but it's.
But it's not even like kids whoare in a cult, just people who
kids who say are born to parentsthat are not into spiritual
stuff at all right and theydon't get why their kids so like
talking to their imaginaryfriend named billy you know what
(35:37):
I mean like so because when yousay you're experiencing these
things and then you have adults,parents or you know some people
who you look up to say that itdoesn't exist, then what happens
?
You shut that down becauseyou're told it's not real.
(35:58):
So those are the kids that Iwrote this book for.
Is the kids to be like that?
If you are experiencing thesethings, it's not necessarily
wrong.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
So it could be a kid that just doesn't maybe believe
in the religion that's in hisfamily or her family.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Yeah, or maybe they're just born to parents who
don't have any kind of spirit,communication or super like.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
Not into this at all, but they are it sounds
interesting and I can take thisout if you don't want to do it.
What Did you want?
To read a little bit of thebook, like just on the show I
can Like like just on the show.
I can Like any part of the bookyou wanted to share with us.
I was just going to get it uphere because Matt sent it to me
on the drive up and I haven'thad a chance to listen to it yet
.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
I know I should have said this.
The story is called Whispersfrom the Farm.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Well, that's the thing.
So actually I can even justbefore she reads it there.
So so tanya is a survivor, ahealer and a guide for women
reclaiming their power.
After breaking free from adoomsday religion that
suppressed her intuitive andhealing gifts, she forged her
own path, raising threedaughters as a single mother,
while rediscovering her strengthtoday as a leader in divine
(37:04):
feminine healing.
Tanya empowers women throughnaturopathy, transformative
retreats and education.
So that's what you wrote in theback kind of like a description
of you yeah um, which, which I Imean honestly reading that, I
think a lot of people wouldgravitate towards.
I think that speaks a lot ofpeople yeah um, but yeah, we can
pull up uh trying to pull it uphere.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
It's uh taking a really long time to load.
Speaker 2 (37:26):
Maybe you're gonna have more luck on your phone now
maybe yeah it's hard to say wehave all this interference who
illustrated the book mypublisher okay people, who does
that, who did the illustrations,and and he he deals a lot with
heavy subjects.
That's part of the reason Iwent with him is that he does
(37:49):
deal with okay heavy subjectsand puts it in a in a way that
children can consume it, I guessright without probably I want
that too small to read rightthere right from the beginning
oh, I could probably read that.
I just have to.
Okay, I can try here.
Um, tanya had always feltdifferent.
(38:09):
A tender thread woven into thefabric of a rural hobby farm,
nestled far from the clamor oftown life.
To her family she was toosensitive.
Excuse me, it's funny.
My throat started closing offwhen I said that.
Something to be tamed.
But to her the gentle sway ofthe willow trees, the rustle of
(38:32):
the corn and the silentcommunication with the animals.
So what this is speaking to isthe fact that I am very
sensitive, very soft-hearted,and raising animals and
(39:02):
slaughtering animals and alsobeing sensitive to spirit.
Communication in my childhoodwas not okay, right?
So I talk in the book about howthere were certain gifts I came
into like scrying through andyou guys would have seen a scry
(39:22):
when we did the ghost hunt wherewe looked into the mirror and
then things would appear.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Well.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
I was doing that at five years old in the bathroom.
I never even heard of it orseen of it.
I just knew that when I lookedin the mirror and the light was
a certain way, I could seefigures.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
Sounds like the end of a movie.
Stuck in a cult seeing ghostsin the mirror.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
Yeah, Well, and in your book I mean because I went
through it and everything likethis afternoon and I did see
that like kind of speaking tothat spiritual side of things, I
know, when you left and thenyou end up becoming a mother
with your kids, you end upbuying we talked about there,
you bought like a farmhouse.
And in the book it talks abouthow everything seemed great at
first.
Yeah, it literally like thissounds like the plot of a horror
(40:04):
story Right, it's likeeverything seemed great at first
.
They moved to this new town inthe country.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Exactly, but then all of a sudden she started hearing
voices, yeah.
But literally that's whathappened to you, though, yeah.
Speaker 3 (40:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Yeah, because I had to shut all that down.
So imagine being raised in this, this cult.
It'd be right.
And then, all of a sudden,you're saying like oh mom, I'm
seeing my ancestors behind me,I'm talking to great, great,
great grandmother.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
And like mother and right, like no, that's a demon.
So you shut that stuff down,right, you just shut it down
because it's scary.
Yeah, like this, thing that younaturally do is all of a sudden
bad and it's scary, so I shutit down.
For years I had to yeah so, um,when I started having my
daughters is when it justfinally came back because they
were experiencing things.
Speaker 3 (40:52):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
So, like, what do you do?
I had to tap into this stufffrom my childhood of like, okay,
I've got to protect my kids,I've got to figure out what's
going on, because my middledaughter was communicating and
not having a good experience.
I was having things walk up tome.
Things smashed in the cup, likeit was really like heavy-duty
(41:17):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
So I had to go.
Okay, I got to bring this stuffback online because I have to
protect my kids.
I have to figure this outbecause I don't want to live
like that, you know, scared.
I don't want to be in fearagain.
Speaker 1 (41:30):
Yeah, yeah, I get that.
Speaker 2 (41:32):
Yeah, you know, scared, I don't want to be in
fear again.
Yeah, yeah, so, yeah.
So then that that's what reallyspurred.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
Well, it was always there, like I was always
experiencing things, but I justhave you had any time like, have
you tried like conventionaltherapies and stuff, or would?
You always find no, no, I'mjust asking not to be rude, you
need help.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
No, no, no, no.
I'm just curious.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
I'm asking out of kindness, like, did you try
going to see like a therapist atany point?
Speaker 2 (41:53):
For like the cult deprogramming kind of stuff.
Yeah, for all of it.
Yeah, because I mean it wouldjust kind of just see how you
know, all this manifested inyour mind.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
It must have.
Speaker 2 (42:04):
I mean, I went to therapy for some stuff, for sure
, but like this was more, thiswas just different, like this.
You have to understand.
This is how I experienced theworld as a child, so it wasn't
anything scary it wasn'tanything right different it was
just something I had and thenhad to shut down, and then it.
It's what made sense to me yeah,yeah right, like it's what,
(42:25):
it's what made sense, and so, um, and then, like you said, like
your kids are experiencing this.
You never talked about it.
Why are you know?
All of a sudden they haveimaginary friends that play with
the toys in the closet whennobody's there in the middle of
the night.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:40):
Do you know how to explain that?
So that really woke that partup.
Speaker 1 (42:44):
How are the kids now?
Are they still kind of feelingthat stuff?
Speaker 2 (42:48):
Not as much.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
No.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
No, they kind of.
I think sometimes you just go,I just don't need to do this and
to exist in this world rightnow right, so that's what I did
too maybe it's interesting whathappens when they have children
down the road.
Speaker 1 (43:02):
Yeah, yeah, maybe you know the cycle will keep
repeating.
Yeah, it could be.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
I just think some people are born more sensitive
than others and they experiencethings differently they.
The world is just a littledifferent for them, and so
either you suppress who younaturally are or you don't.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
And.
Speaker 2 (43:18):
I think there's a lot of misery that comes with
suppressing who you are.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
I believe that.
Yeah, I believe that too, yeah.
Speaker 2 (43:24):
And so that's really what it's about.
It's like to, if you areexperiencing the world this way,
you're not broken.
You're not broken, you're notwrong, you're not possessed by a
demon, right right, like thishas brought me a lot of joy in
my life and a lot ofunderstanding of the spiritual
world.
And it's like I study ancientmystics.
(43:45):
I study like I'm not.
It's not just like wooey, let'sget a crystal and put it right
through the eye, like you know,like I study like esoteric, the
masters, like a lot of some ofthe stuff you know starting to
be scientifically proven.
So it's not as like mysticalScience is starting to actually
speak to some of this stuff.
Speaker 1 (44:05):
It's fascinating stuff, yeah it really is yeah
100% yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
It's blending quantum physics and science with the
mystery.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
I also say it's getting really hot in this
closet.
Yeah, keep the door closed.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, so Whispers from the Farm is what the book
is called, yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:21):
So, and you said, it's available on the
publisher's website and it'savailable online on Amazon.
Speaker 2 (44:26):
On Amazon yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
So yeah, so definitely keep an eye out for
that.
I say we move right into our 10questions because our 10
questions are definitely goingto trigger some things, I'm sure
.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
So question number one I'll kick it off.
So what other avenues in lifedo you see cult style behavior?
Speaker 2 (44:45):
Well, I see a lot like politics.
Speaker 3 (44:48):
That's where I see it , yep.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
I see a lot of it in these multi-level marketing
companies.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
I can see that stuff too, these MLM companies.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
There's serious cult behavior there.
I can see that, yeah, it's likeours is the best and that's it.
And and like we're only friendswith each other.
Speaker 3 (45:08):
And, like there's a lot of blindly follow somebody I
mean I.
You know, some people may ormay love this or hate this, but
I firmly believe that trump is acult that's that's my thought,
not republicans yeah, mega,because right they.
I see so much of it where it'slike you watch these people go
in there and they talk to themand they say like, hey, you
(45:29):
think this.
And they're like, oh, yeah, Ithink this.
And then they prove to themthat they're wrong.
Like they prove the opposite ofwhat they think, and they're
still like nah no that's not itand you're wrong.
Like.
That's a lie, that's fake news,right.
Speaker 2 (45:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
So that is like I see so much.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
But I could say that about Trudeau, people who
believe Trudeau too, about a lotof stuff.
And so I think, honestly, it'sall of them.
Speaker 3 (45:51):
It is all of them, don't get me wrong.
It exists in all of it.
I just see it more in in MAGAthan I see it anything else.
Speaker 2 (46:03):
But yes, I see it anything else but?
Speaker 3 (46:04):
yes, every single person who blindly because there
are people blindly follows anypolitical party, like the real
party subscribers, where it'slike have you ever have you
voted for anyone else in thelast 20 years?
No, right?
Speaker 2 (46:14):
why right?
But that's the differencebetween, like, free thinkers.
Yeah, right, because what'shappening there is, like are
these even your thoughts?
Like, and that happens with allsorts of things now I find like
cancel culture like it's like,come on, like okay, fine, that's
not your style of comedy, butdo we have to cancel the dude
just to watch it?
Speaker 3 (46:34):
you know what?
Don't watch it.
There was a comedian and I'veactually kind of subscribed to
this now.
It was comedian said there's nosuch thing as cancel culture
you just change your audience.
Speaker 2 (46:43):
Yeah, I kind of believe that now yeah, but it's
that idea no that idea of cancelculture, of just basically like
you don't believe what Ibelieve, so that's it.
You're, you're done and it'slike.
Personally, I like flavor, Ilike differences and if, if I
can't have a conversation withyou and not get mad, then is it
(47:05):
my actual belief system, or whoam I trying to convince myself,
or you?
Because either you really feelthat, or you don't, and you're
just trying to regurgitate whatyou've heard, I would have
canceled this conversation andmoved to question number two.
Question number two.
Question number two.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
What's your favorite movie?
Speaker 2 (47:24):
My favorite movie.
Oh God, there's so many.
Just one movie that you loveLord of the Rings.
Lord of the Rings Cool.
I'm a huge Tolkien fan, oh manyou're one out of three.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
We're not Lords of the Rings fans here.
No that's not true.
You like it or person right, no, I'm a big.
Tolkien fan.
It's okay, though, yeah, allright.
Speaker 3 (47:43):
Question number three , just with the hobbits and
stuff.
All right, so question numberthree.
This is a direct throwback toyou.
How do you think the world willend?
Speaker 2 (47:52):
How do I think the world will end?
Oh God, I don't think it will.
No, no, okay, I don't think itwill.
Speaker 3 (48:00):
I mean, I think it will.
It'll just be like 4 billionyears from now.
Speaker 2 (48:03):
Yeah, and I think we'll just start again.
It'll be the sixth extensionand we'll start again.
Speaker 3 (48:09):
Yeah, it's just cycles.
That's true.
That's how I see it.
Speaker 2 (48:11):
It's just cycles, robots, yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:13):
I mean energy or robots.
Speaker 1 (48:24):
Or robots the other.
Speaker 3 (48:24):
So there is a theory that there's been multiple big
bangs.
So there is that.
Yeah, all right.
Oh, it's your turn, matt.
Speaker 1 (48:27):
No, I just asked that question, okay, question number
four okay, this is a question,a terrible question, because
while we were here, they have atrailer park boys special burger
, yeah, so they kept playing thetrailer park boys theme song
over and over again here at theplace to celebrate the burger
that just came out today.
So it was a lot of hearing thesame song over and over again.
But if you had to listen to onesong forever, what would it be?
Speaker 2 (48:50):
Oh, these are hard questions.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
I just like so many different things, just one song
you could listen to On repeatfor a while.
Speaker 2 (49:00):
Music.
I don't think I can answer that.
No, you really can't.
I can't answer that, no, no,you really can't.
That's all right, I love music.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
We'd say take a drink .
But we left them in the otherroom.
We finished them.
We already finished them.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
Okay, we'll go to the next question then.
Yeah, have you ever beenstarstruck if you met a ghost
that was famous?
You ever been a littlestarstruck who was like a famous
?
Speaker 2 (49:24):
celebrity.
So who would be?
Who would be edgar casey?
Speaker 3 (49:29):
edgar casey edgar he's the, the.
Speaker 2 (49:32):
He has the largest collection of psychic readings
in the world okay, and he wascalled the sleeping prophet okay
he would go into these, thesetrans-like states, and give
incredible readings that wereaccurate, okay cool and he died
in basic poverty because he didit for free, for people to help
him.
Speaker 3 (49:50):
Oh, wow, yeah, Edgar Cayce, so okay.
So if you're saying, if youever met him in ghost form, you
would be, starstruck.
Speaker 2 (49:58):
I'd be like, oh my God, Okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (50:00):
Oh my God, Over here, mike, okay, all right.
Do you believe in aliens?
Speaker 2 (50:05):
yes 100.
Speaker 1 (50:06):
Yeah, me too.
Yeah, yeah, why not?
That's another podcast.
Speaker 3 (50:10):
I have a few experiences anyway, moving on,
we'll see you again, uh oh, Ithink there's one that we
skipped over, but I'll go backto it.
Um, do you believe in evolution?
Speaker 2 (50:21):
evolution in the form of like like.
What do you mean by that?
Monkey to man, fish to mammalno little brains forming in the
ocean, little brains turninginto little brains getting fins
no, I believe in creation littlebrains getting, but not in
creation in the religious sense.
No, okay, so, okay.
So you believe in creation.
I believe in a grand design.
Speaker 1 (50:44):
Ooh, damn.
Okay, there's blends, it's aspectrum.
I'm more of an evolution guy.
I think We'll see you know whatthough.
There can be both.
What there can be bothEvolution yeah, there can be
both.
Speaker 3 (50:56):
There really can be both.
There can be both.
Um, not neil degrasse tyson,but the uh, the british guy with
the, the long hair kind ofthing.
He was talking about that andsaid that there.
Even though he firmly believesin evolution and science and
everything he said, that doesn'tmean he's not that there's not
creation as well, and vice versa.
Speaker 2 (51:13):
Just because creation does not mean there's not.
Speaker 1 (51:15):
We're evolving right now, yeah yes like we are so I
believe this podcast of alltonight it sure it sure did.
Speaker 3 (51:23):
It went from ape to human pretty quick.
Speaker 1 (51:28):
All right, okay, where are we at here?
Scariest place you've ever been.
I always feel like that was thecult place.
Well, it's probably the worstplace you've ever been.
Speaker 3 (51:37):
Stop answering questions for her, sorry, yeah,
yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:40):
I'll try.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Like scariest place I've ever been.
Yeah sorry.
Speaker 2 (51:47):
Yeah, I'll try like scariest place I've ever been.
Speaker 1 (51:48):
Yeah uh, ghost hunted .
Speaker 2 (51:48):
Yeah, that's a.
That's super.
Yeah, that's scary.
Yeah, I'd probably say freetown, state forest in the, in
the states there's.
That was like really terrifying.
But we were paranormalinvestigating so we kind of went
there on purpose okay, that'slegit.
Speaker 1 (52:02):
This one one required a little psychic power onto you
, matt.
Speaker 3 (52:05):
Yes, that's right, because this is coming out
within the time frame of it.
I figured I'd throw this outthere.
Who will win the Stanley Cup?
Florida or Edmonton?
Speaker 2 (52:15):
You're asking an Alberta girl.
So what do you think?
Oh God, I don't even followsports.
Speaker 3 (52:22):
Just so you know, as we sit here on.
Friday the 13th it is tied 2-2.
Speaker 2 (52:27):
2-2.
Yeah, with three games left, soit's the best of the three
series.
Right now I say Edmondson Allright, there you go.
I like it.
That could just be my Albertblood coming out.
There you go, last question.
Speaker 1 (52:38):
Yeah, last, yeah, last question.
We ask every guest, this onewhat's one piece of advice you
were given that you would liketo share with us or to others
listening today?
Piece of advice you got itthrough your life, at any point.
Speaker 2 (52:50):
Honestly, just authenticity.
Don't be scared to be weird, Ilike that I like that.
Just be authentically yourself,even if it because the right
people will find you.
You don't want people in yourlife that aren't going to accept
you for all your weirdness.
Speaker 3 (53:04):
I love that.
You should actually like maket-shirts that says don't be
scared to be weird.
Yeah, I think that could catchon.
Speaker 1 (53:11):
There you go.
Yeah, scared to be weird,cheers everyone.
This is a lovely thing we'regoing to cheers on high fives.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much, thank you.
Cheers, cheers, and welcome to the Afternoon Plenty.
I'm Mike Colby, I'm Matt Conrad, and who do we have with us
today?
Speaker 2 (00:06):
Tanya Stifler.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Tanya, you've been here before.
Speaker 3 (00:09):
Yeah, so the last time that you were here, last
time we met, like were together,you stuck me in a tunnel
underneath a building that washaunted.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Yes.
Speaker 3 (00:18):
Yes, so welcome back.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
He survived, I so welcome back.
Speaker 3 (00:24):
He survived, I did survive, I was blindfolded and
had headphones on and, yeah, inthese creepy tunnels under the
city of Halifax.
So you are a returning guest.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah.
You should pause and just saylike that was not anything you
know, adult, it was for anexperiment to kind of get in
touch with spirits and stuff.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
It was a haunted ghost investigation.
It took us on Paranormalinvestigations, right you?
Speaker 1 (00:51):
guys, you blindfolded him and put earphones on him,
right, yeah, yeah, they did.
And then what was the purposeof that?
Again, I'm just trying toremember.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Because it was just static and you guys who were up
you, you know, not in thetunnels um were asking questions
to the ghosts in the buildingand I was, uh, saying the
answers that I was hearing,seeing how the questions matched
up with the answers some ofthem did pretty good some of
them wind up.
(01:19):
Weirdly weird, do you?
remember them calling my name,saying yes, yeah, yeah, yeah,
that was cool so so you're areturning guest, but we wanted
to have you back for a while now, because you said something in
that original podcast that wewere like, oh, you just dropped
it, really you dropped it.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
Yeah, just like no warning.
Just there you go.
Speaker 1 (01:39):
I grew up in a cult, yeah, and we were like holy shit
, yeah, and uh, you know thatwas.
It was like kind of a kind ofnot something you hear every day
, right, and uh, we talked aboutit after and we said, man, we
didn't really get much about hergrowing up in a cult which
seemed like a very maybe one ofthe most interesting things that
were said that that episodeyeah very much so and when we
(02:01):
had the chance we talked.
We were like man, we want, wantto get her back to talk about
this.
We want to really understandwhat you were going through,
what happened and all this what?
Speaker 3 (02:10):
brought you to here, but this was the great, this was
the perfect timing, and we canget into this a little bit later
, but we'll talk about your book, so this is kind of the perfect
time so we can save the bookstuff for the end to kind of
pitch that and all that um, andI got to read it today.
But so, uh, before we getstarted talking about your life
growing up, uh, I just want tosay thank you to the old number
(02:31):
seven.
We are out in jador on theeastern shore.
I am having a really, reallygreat tasty caesar, what do you
have in there, mike?
Speaker 1 (02:39):
I got the number seven draft they make here.
It's awesome.
All right, nice light beer, I'myou.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
I actually don't know .
You surprised me.
You ordered a drink, you got aStrongbow cider, my friend, okay
.
Yeah, so there you go.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
It's 42%.
No just joking, I think it's alow alcohol.
Beer Ciders are what Usually?
6%, 5%, five.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
Strongbow is 5%.
Yeah, that's a good thing,because I'm a lightweight.
Yeah, there you go, cool.
Speaker 3 (03:06):
And these are small beers.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Those are actually small beers, yeah so they
shouldn't cause too much trouble.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
And this is Friday the 13th.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Yes, it's a good day.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
Creepy, spooky stuff, that's spooky a little louder
than usual.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
And it was just the strawberry full moon.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
There you go.
I have no idea what that means.
Sounds delicious.
Well, you know how, like themoon, has been read the last
reading, oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:29):
It's a strawberry full moon and Friday the 13th is
actually the day of the goddess.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
So it's been like kind of changed into a scary
thing, but it's actually a goodday, see, so I actually love
friday the 13th so does harryswift really that's true, yeah,
you and t swift got somethingmean swift, yeah, that's yeah
yeah, we both, they're bondingyou know, in 13, that's right
there you go all right let's geton.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
We're going to talk about cults, because this is the
most interesting thing that youcan talk about.
My wife loves that stuff reallyso yeah.
So let's get kind of rolling inhere I mean first off let's on
an elementary level.
Speaker 1 (04:09):
What is a culture?
Speaker 2 (04:10):
well, I mean, I think the definition would be kind of
different for a lot ofdifferent people, right?
So for me, what that woulddefine is something that really,
um, completely takes over yourentire life and your entire
mindset controls every aspect ofthat.
So what you eat, what you wear,what music you listen to
(04:33):
basically everything that wewould make normal choices over
is basically kind of likemandated by this church or this
organization, right?
Speaker 1 (04:45):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:46):
So I grew up that way , like I had to dress a certain
way, I had to speak a certainway as a woman.
Speaker 3 (04:53):
And where was this?
I had to be subservientSouthern Alberta.
Southern Alberta Okay.
Speaker 2 (04:56):
Yeah, yeah.
So as a woman, it was evenharder.
Speaker 1 (05:01):
Can you tell me exactly where in Southern
Alberta it was?
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Well, it was very, very south.
Speaker 1 (05:05):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (05:06):
So I have to be careful because I have family.
All my family members are stillin, okay.
Speaker 3 (05:10):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Yeah, I'm not part of it, and so I've been shunned.
Speaker 3 (05:15):
No respect then.
Speaker 2 (05:16):
Right, yeah, so I've had no communication with five
of my six siblings for probably30 years.
Speaker 3 (05:24):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (05:30):
Yeah, of my six siblings for probably 30 years.
Wow, yeah, my nieces, mynephews nothing, no, and as far,
as you know, they're all stillinvolved with this.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
Oh yeah, very much, so very, very much so my brother
um, who just passed.
He, him and I were the onlyones that had left and we're
both free thinkers, so it's likeat a very young age I knew
something wasn't right and he heis too like he was very
open-minded.
Speaker 3 (05:48):
So so you uh that's the thing I was gonna ask is
like what age did you really umkind of start to realize like
something's not right?
Speaker 2 (05:57):
well, honestly, it started really young.
Um, because I am very spiritualand I am very connected.
I tell the story that kind ofmy first time I realized
something wasn't connecting waswhen I was like a little girl,
probably about even like six,five, six years old, and I would
lay in the grass field and Iwould feel super connected to
(06:21):
everything, like I felt reallyconnected to everything around
me and part of it all.
And then my mom would say timefor time to go to church and
she'd bring me in the house, puta scratchy dress, tight shoes,
put me in a building and saythis is where we worship God and
I was like this feels soseparate from where I was, like
(06:41):
I felt so connected toeverything.
And now I feel in a buildingwith no windows and this man's
talking all this fear and doomand it felt it just didn't feel
right.
Speaker 3 (06:55):
It didn't feel right Characterize it as a doomsday
cult.
Yeah, so like what is it likein terms of like kind of like
the beliefs and stuff like that?
Was it like a like a Christiansect?
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Yeah, okay.
So I wasn't sure if it was likesomething like off of yeah,
okay, so yeah, fundamentalist.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Right.
Speaker 2 (07:12):
Like really, you know , normal Christians would go to
church on Sunday and have someyou know tea and crackers after
and everything's great.
No, like we're preparing forthe end of the world.
Speaker 1 (07:22):
No, we were preparing for the end of the world, oh
yeah.
And what did they say aboutthat?
What was like?
I mean, as a kid, you rememberwhat were your bedtime stories
about?
Were they about the worldending Terror?
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
So we were told everyone was going to die.
My teachers were going to die.
Everybody that I'd come across,my schoolmates, were all going
to die.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Was there a set date, we would be the only ones.
Speaker 2 (07:44):
There was a rough estimate, but it's all like in
God's time.
You know like, and then you'resupposed to watch for signs,
right?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
So I remember, so you were seeing teachers and all
that.
So you were not, you were notisolated, we weren't.
Speaker 2 (07:55):
You were still going to public school and stuff.
Right, we were in the world.
(08:30):
Okay, all right, sensitivechild and I'm, you know, really
soft-hearted and I'm seeing allthese people that I'm like, like
imagine sitting in a classroomand going.
Like all these people I careabout, that are my friends, are
all going to die any day, andhow old were you then at?
That time Five years old.
My gosh, like you're taughtthis soon, could you imagine?
Speaker 1 (08:38):
thinking about that as a six-year-old or a
five-year-old right, not justunicorns and things.
Speaker 3 (08:45):
Yeah, over a firework , right?
Yeah, not just unicorns andthings.
Yeah, you should be playingwith barbies.
So they it was.
It was a lot of like, uhobviously like that kind of prep
type of stuff, uh, likeprepping yeah, armageddon um,
but like as far as you know,because I mean obviously cults
come with other weird thingsthat can happen like is there?
Was there anything else thatwas kind of going on like that?
(09:05):
That was just way out there,like I know.
Like you know, there's polygamystuff and all that other weird
stuff.
That kind of happens.
I know, I was in a a town lastyear.
I was in the summer yeah and Iwas in a place in northern
arizona like right on the borderof utah yeah and they had a
town where the the former mayor,okay used to run like a and all
(09:28):
the council was part of this.
Like cult.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Yeah, and it was a religious cult yeah anyway, he
went to jail in 2013 forbasically like child brides
right, yeah, so I don't know ifthere's anything like that there
there was, it wasn't.
It wasn't open in the way that,like that was part of the
teachings, but a lot of stuffwent on.
Speaker 3 (09:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
Like a lot of abuse went on yeah, physical abuse,
and it would happen in front ofeverybody.
I remember like little kidsbeside me wouldn't sit still for
the teachings, and justliterally in front of everybody
their parents like slapping themso hard they'd fall off their
chair.
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:09):
For not sitting still .
These kids are four.
How are they supposed to sitstill for two?
Speaker 3 (10:13):
three hours, oh, exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
And everybody just sat there and allowed it to
happen, right?
So there was things like that.
There was basically a rule thatif, say, you were being
molested or some terrible thinglike that was happening, two
other people had to witness it.
Speaker 3 (10:32):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
And things are dealt with in the church.
Speaker 3 (10:36):
Yep.
Speaker 1 (10:38):
So let's just say… it's not really a system of
justice.
Speaker 2 (10:41):
It 100% is it victimizes women and children a
lot, and I saw a lot of that andexperience.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So imagine you know your, youruncle, your dad, your brother's
doing something to you.
Two other people have to comeforward.
Speaker 1 (10:55):
You have to sit in there with your perpetrator
right in front of a bunch ofpanel of other men and you can
be a child, yeah absolutely yeah, and they kind of have their
own justice, which, when you,isn't really I mean, as a kid,
you probably brought home stuffthat was, you know, full of
happiness and sunlight, likebringing home.
Uh, you know, you hear about acharacter in school that's
(11:18):
popular like a mickey mouse typecharacter, you hear everybody
else and you start kind ofliving in a funner imagination.
Were you scolded out of that?
Or like what happened when youdid those normal things that
kids do, because they're always,you know, seem quite you know
manifesting their own happiness,in a sense, you know.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
I'll tell you a story about the Smurfs.
Do you remember the Smurfs?
Oh, hell, yeah, that was odd initself.
Speaker 1 (11:41):
It was one like a thousand dudes in one woman's
smurf, yeah, which is kind ofweird, right, that's kind of
weird.
It's kind of an odd cult in itsown sense.
It kind of is.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
But I remember I loved watching the smurfs right
Cartoons and I collected themand they were this fun toy.
And then a church mandate Iguess you could say they sent it
to all the churches tobasically tell everyone that the
Smurfs were demonic and thatthey basically that's Smurfing
(12:13):
Ridiculous, smurfing Ridiculous.
So Smurfing over the top, butyeah, so get all your Smurfs.
So I remember gathering all mySmurfs because they were telling
instances of Smurfs waking likestrangling kids in the night,
like really crazy shit, okay.
But like when you're in it, it'snormal.
Speaker 1 (12:37):
Like you're on the shelf level terrifying that
there's things moving aroundyour house at night.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
Yeah, and so we had to like burn it in the bird, all
the toys in the burning barrel,and I remember having night
terrors because I couldn't findone of the smurfs and I like,
but it's like, that's normal wowyeah, like on out of it you're
going, like that was crazy, butlike in it you're just like okay
that they are demonic, I mustfind them and burn them.
Speaker 1 (13:02):
Were there even televisions in these, like where
you live in?
Speaker 2 (13:05):
like yeah, yeah yeah, there was tvs, but we, we could
only watch certain things rightyeah, and listen to certain
music and, um, like, as a female, we weren't allowed to pray if
there was a man in the house youweren't allowed to pray pray.
The man had to pray like so youknow like so you know, like you
(13:25):
pray over your meal.
you're having lunch, so let'ssay the man was upstairs in his
office and he couldn't come downand bless your meal.
We would have to wear like,let's just say, this is all I
had as a napkin.
I would have to put the napkinon my head to pray, to say or a
tablecloth or a rag, whatever torepresent my submission to the
(13:48):
male in the house.
Speaker 1 (13:49):
Seems like humiliation, without even
realizing it.
Speaker 3 (13:52):
That's what I was wondering.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
So the origins of this cult do you know how it
happened, where this came from.
Was there a particular personthat kind of founded this
organization?
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Yeah, yeah, and then basically, um that, yeah, it's a
whole governing body.
Speaker 3 (14:12):
There's a whole lot of okay, yeah, like how old is
it like?
Was it something like it's likestarted in like 1968, or was it
?
Speaker 2 (14:20):
yeah, it fairly early on, like I would say early,
like it hasn't been around awhole long time I'd say probably
gosh, I don't even know like 50, 60 years, maybe enough, so it
was someone like fairly modernthat just decided like, hey,
we're separating from this yeahchristian church and going
further down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 3 (14:41):
Yeah, further down the rabbit hole.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Yeah, further down the rabbit hole and a lot of,
like I said, the doomsday ofjust like world ending all the
time.
And oh, you notice there's alot of crows, there's a lot of
like carrion, that's, yeah, likebirds, because there's an
increase in that, because you'regoing to have to eat all the
dead bodies after God comes anddestroys the world.
Speaker 3 (15:00):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
So you're always looking for signs and it's
really like and the thing thatpeople don't maybe understand
about being raised in that isthat it really, really affects
you the rest of your life.
There's a lot of poverty thatcomes with this, because you're
not allowed to have an educationpast high school they really
(15:22):
discourageage you.
So here you are.
Like you know I was.
I wanted to be an archeologist.
I know weird right, but that'swhat I wanted to do, and then,
no, you don't do that,especially as a woman.
So even when you leave this,you're not set up to succeed in
life and you're so shelteredthat when you go into the world
you're like this shiny thingthat's super naive and then you
(15:47):
attract kind of predators right.
Speaker 3 (15:50):
We know they can take advantage of it yeah.
Speaker 2 (15:52):
Because you just trust everybody and you're
Pollyanna out there and it'sjust it's.
It leads to a lot of trauma,actually.
Speaker 1 (15:59):
When did you leave?
How old were you when you gotout of this?
I?
Speaker 2 (16:01):
was 18.
I was 18.
I was pieced out, 18.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
And was that an age where you got the chance to make
a decision for yourself?
Or was it just I'm out?
Speaker 2 (16:10):
Well, they tried to marry me off at 16.
To somebody I didn't know, Wow,we had met at a big gathering
and he came over when I was 16.
My first like, oh, I like thisboy, right, and we over like I
was 16, my first like, oh, Ilike this boy.
And, uh, we had to bechaperoned all of the time.
Yep.
So my younger brotherchaperoned me.
We went to a movie.
(16:30):
We came home to my mom's houseeverybody was around.
The church leaders in my churchfound out about it and we were
not allowed to speak anymore.
We had to write letters for ayear and then, after the year,
we were assumed that now we'regoing to get married and I was
like I don't even know this dude.
Speaker 1 (16:53):
So you had a one-year pen pal marriage.
One-year pen pal marriage, oh,my dear God.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
So by then I'm like 17, 17 and a half and I'm just
like this is not for me.
Were they from the same, werethey?
Speaker 1 (17:05):
from the same like, like I want to say hood but I
don't know same area that youwere from or were they from
another area?
Speaker 2 (17:10):
They were from another city.
Okay.
Speaker 1 (17:12):
So this, this cult, must've had other, like pockets
pockets in other areas?
Speaker 2 (17:17):
Yeah, is there a?
Speaker 1 (17:18):
name of this cult.
There again, I have to becareful, because I've got my
entire family in it.
I respect that.
It's hard.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Is it a situation where they recruit people or is
it a situation where people?
Speaker 1 (17:37):
are Sorry.
You're banging your hand on thetable, Is it?
Speaker 2 (17:40):
a situation where they there's a lot of
recruitment.
Let's just put it that way.
People can possibly start tomake connections to what I'm
talking about.
Speaker 1 (17:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Yeah, so I mean there's recruitment, so I mean
it's….
Speaker 2 (17:55):
And the recruitment's quite… Like I remember being a
recruiter.
At a young age they would go.
You're cute little girls.
We're going to get you to go dothis and it would be things
like oh, they just lost this, oh, she's a widow, she just lost
her husband, so she's going tobe basically pride picking to be
(18:18):
recruited Right, right, right.
Speaker 1 (18:21):
Wow, so they were bringing the people of different
ages and such as well, huh.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
Yeah, I had dogs sicked on me.
I've had all sorts of stuffhappen when I tried to tell
people the truth and revert themand stuff, even at a young age.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
So would you have a book you'd go around with with
values or pamphlets, to kind of?
Speaker 2 (18:40):
explain your way yeah .
Speaker 3 (18:42):
Interesting to kind of explain your way.
Yeah, interesting.
I guess it's one of thosethings where, too, is like you
um, oh, this sounds like music'sstarting.
I thought they were going todelay that, but all right oh
well, either way we'll try tocarry on, guys.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
If not, we might have to uh reconvene, but we'll see
what's up yeah, we'll see what'sup there you go.
Speaker 3 (19:02):
All right, cool, all right.
It's one of those trying to getback to where we were, because
I completely lost track.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Now, guys, I think we've got to pause.
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah, maybe, yeah, it's just going to be too
difficult.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
It is yeah hey there.
Speaker 1 (19:38):
So yeah, it got a little loud out in the main
floor.
Uh bands, a guy started playingand knew he was coming, but we
weren't sure what was going tohappen.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
And the place is full .
Yeah, the place is packed,literally full.
Right, it's a.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
Friday night.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
The old number seven is a bumming place to go.
They got a lot going on outthere, right, so thanks to Will
for letting us go into his it'shis office.
Speaker 3 (19:59):
His office, his office down the office here.
We're in his office now in theback of the restaurant.
Speaker 1 (20:02):
We're shoulder to shoulder in this place, but it
works and people are probablythinking this is the best the
show has ever sounded.
Speaker 3 (20:08):
Probably so.
Thanks a lot.
Will Great sound.
Exactly, this is the best sound.
So, Matt, where we left off, wewere talking about cult
recruitment and all that stuffNot being able to be educated
and stuff like that right.
Yeah, lo that back into likehow hard it is to sell religion
to people yeah um, when theydon't feel they need it right
(20:30):
but you were saying about howthey you were recruiting like
old people and like people thatwe know?
Speaker 1 (20:35):
yeah, yeah.
Why would they recruit likeolder people?
What's the value?
Was it to take their money?
Speaker 2 (20:40):
well, not just older, but if anybody had a big loss.
Speaker 1 (20:43):
Yeah, right.
Speaker 2 (20:44):
Right, because, like, you're going to get people
looking for something, someanswers, some meaning something
when they're at their lowest.
Speaker 3 (20:55):
Right.
Speaker 2 (20:55):
Right.
So when you hit people withsave your soul and like, oh my
God, you're going to go toheaven, and like this is, you
know all those story lines, whenthey're at their, their lowest
point, they are way moresusceptible, way more
susceptible to those types ofmessages yeah, and even, and
sometimes even like if they lostsomeone like really close to
(21:16):
them they're also just lookingfor that like meaning again in
their life andyou swoop in and tell them to
drink the kool-aid yeah and andlike I mean just meaning of life
, but they want to know thattheir loved one is okay.
Speaker 3 (21:29):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:29):
Like oh, they're not just gone.
It's like no, they're actuallyin heaven and they're living
their best life, you know, eventhough they're dead.
Speaker 3 (21:37):
Yeah, but with that, though, that is something that
you have carried on through yourpost-cultish lifestyle.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Right.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
Right, because you still very much like connect
with the spiritual world.
Speaker 2 (21:53):
Yeah, and that's one thing I have to say I'm very
grateful for is that thatupbringing gave me the concept
of that?
There's something else.
Speaker 3 (22:07):
Right, you were saying about how you're grateful
, about how that introduced yourspiritual Like the concept,
yeah, the concept ofspirituality, of other something
else, yeah, so yeah, I mean,and that's carried out
throughout my whole life,because it's kind of like the
matrix, what do you think?
Is it the blue?
Speaker 2 (22:24):
or the red pill, I don't know.
Yeah, it just, is it blue orred?
The matrix red.
Yeah, it's not even yourfavorite movie, you don't?
Speaker 1 (22:31):
know.
No, it's a red.
Speaker 3 (22:32):
All right cool.
Speaker 2 (22:32):
So once you take that red pill, there's no going back
, right?
So it did open up my mind toother worldly things as far as.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
I mean we kind of.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
I guess a little covered about how it reacts to
you going into the real world,but there must have always been
a part of you that never reallybought it if you were gone the
minute you could go.
Speaker 2 (23:03):
Yeah, 100% Like.
I said like even so, I rememberbeing probably 10, 11 years old
and having to have a likeemergency meeting with the
elders because I was questioningthings that they couldn't
answer so things like okay, soyou're telling me that god is
love yeah, yeah that god he'slove yeah but yet in the bible
(23:28):
there's all these examples ofall these horrendous things,
going like soom and Gomorrah and, like you know, like lots of
wife turning to salt because sheturned around.
Speaker 3 (23:37):
Right.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Like you know, stories of just slaughter and
because what you didn't believethem Like I, just it didn't make
sense.
Yeah, it didn't make sense.
I just it didn't make sense.
Yeah, it didn't make sense,Like as a mother.
Even now it even makes lesssense because there's nothing my
kids could do that would makeme not love them.
Speaker 3 (23:59):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (23:59):
There's literally nothing they could do.
They can murder people and Iwould still love them.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
You know what that kind of.
I won't talk about why it cameup up, but it kind of came up
today with somebody talking withsomebody else and we talked
about how, like there's nothingmy kid could do, and I said if
my, even if my kid turned out tobe a psychopath and killed
somebody, yeah, I wouldn't you,I wouldn't stop loving them, I
wouldn't stop like having arelationship with them.
(24:30):
Yeah, I would probably tellthem to plead guilty yeah and
take.
Take the lumps kind of.
Speaker 2 (24:35):
Thing yeah, I'll come visit you in jail, but uh, yeah
, I just, I could never, everimagine like not having a
relationship with like I wouldhelp them bury the bodies right,
I would, I would, but Iwouldn't stop loving them right,
exactly right so so think of meas a and this was my point at
10 years old, talking to likefour elders, four men that were
(24:59):
like my superiors, like itdoesn't make sense right because
love and god's capacity to lovewould be more than my capacity
as an imperfect human right.
Speaker 3 (25:11):
Exactly yeah, so god's capacity to love would be
more than my capacity as animperfect human right.
Speaker 2 (25:13):
Exactly yeah, so god's capacity to love would be
so much greater than my capacity.
How can I find forgiveness, butgod can't find forgiveness?
Speaker 1 (25:19):
now, how did they react?
Did they?
Did your life get progressivelymore difficult?
Speaker 2 (25:23):
yeah, the thumbs start to come down on me a lot
harder yeah, so like in whatways what?
Happened uh, just even with thesituation with the boy I met,
like right, you know I was verysingled out pen pals only.
Speaker 1 (25:36):
And yeah, isolated, yeah, and always your dress.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Your skirts too short .
Who?
Speaker 1 (25:41):
knows, maybe they thought the marriage thing was
going to help tie you in closeryeah, keep you less of a problem
.
Speaker 2 (25:47):
Yeah, a problem child but that didn't work.
Yeah, no, it didn't, no because, like you said, there was
always a part of me that just itdidn't answer the things I
needed.
Speaker 1 (25:57):
answered you must have had friends growing up,
though, even in this group.
Like how you know, how do youremember them or how do you miss
them, or family and like youknow?
Do you know of anybody that youknow got out?
Speaker 2 (26:12):
I know you said your siblings all stayed in except
for one brother.
Yeah, one friend reached out tome and we've talked, we keep in
contact.
But imagine, at 18 years oldyou decide you're not going to
go to this church anymore andthat means you will say goodbye
forever your community yourfriends, your family, everything
(26:37):
.
Speaker 1 (26:37):
Your identity is gone , everything's gone.
Very well, right, like you musthave changed your name or some
extreme.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
No, I didn't, but I was dead.
Yeah, like that version of meis dead when.
I left, and rightly so.
Like they said you're dead,you're dead to us.
Wow, you're dead, you're deadto us.
Speaker 3 (26:52):
Wow, you're dead, so can you, can you like?
Could you ever go back like,like you say, you're like uh,
you know what, I'm back in, likeI'm I'm I've come around, I'd
have to jump through.
It would be insane like that'sthe thing is like I wonder you
know because, because they'reconstantly recruiting, I'm just
wondering if they likere-recruit.
Speaker 2 (27:13):
I think I'm too far gone, Like I mean, I've come out
as a witch, I've like I'm aghost hunter, Like I'm so far
gone.
Speaker 3 (27:20):
No, I don't even think that there's anything.
I'm just saying, like Otherpeople, yeah.
Speaker 2 (27:33):
Yeah, they've kind of gone back or whatever kind of
thing.
Public right, like?
I'm a content creator, I've gotmillions of views on tiktok, I
I'm so out there in public eyethat I mean maybe that'd be a
feather in their cap to be likeoh well, that's a thing, right,
if you look at like um, the, the, I mean, I mean totally
different thing, but the mormon,uh, the mormon shows there, the
mormon housewife shows that aretaking on the, the wives.
Speaker 1 (27:49):
Yeah, we can't go everywhere I go, so it tells you
about how amazing that show is,and I'm like how great is that
for the mormons, in a sense, tohave all these people paying
their attention to the religionfor a moment like yeah think
about it in in a different way,yeah right, positive or negative
, they don't know the otherstuff well the thing is, though,
is I mean like, when you reallythink about that.
Speaker 3 (28:09):
It's like are they aware of what it's doing?
Because I mean, on one hand,maybe they think it's positive,
but a lot of people don't.
They watch it because.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
It's crazy town.
Yeah, they're judging.
We're watching it for theanarchy.
Yeah, they're judgingthemselves right.
Speaker 3 (28:25):
We talked about this with our guests last week and
everything about how petty andcatty and not very Christian.
Yeah, everything about how, how?
Speaker 2 (28:36):
petty and catty and yeah not very.
Speaker 3 (28:36):
Uh, christian, yeah, very, you know hypocritical that
they, yeah, you, you see theyare, and I mean they must watch
the shows and then go like, wow,I'm coming across real shitty,
right, I mean, you think, youthink but, like you're thinking
it from your mindset yeah, yeah,well like if you're thinking of
it from somebody who's in that?
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:54):
Like I burnt Smurfs because I thought they were
going to choke me out in thenight, right, right.
When you're in it, your braindoesn't operate the same way.
Speaker 1 (29:03):
Oh, that's true.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
And these are things I've really started to unpack
within myself is like how it'saffected my relationships.
Speaker 3 (29:10):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:14):
Right pack within myself is like how it's affected
my relationships.
Yeah right, because I haveattachment problems, because I
think there's part of me thinkswell, you're, you're gonna die
anyway, like, or you're gonnaleave or whatever, like, so it's
affected my bonding issuesbecause everybody's gonna die
right and you're taught that,even like your old family
members, that in it could stillnot be good enough that they,
(29:35):
you, could be tested in the timeof the end, where you have to
watch your mother be killed infront of you and you have to
have the choice of whether toconvert, I mean whether to give
it, give it up or not to saveyour mother.
What are you going to do?
Speaker 3 (29:51):
Right Like.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
these are the things you're taught as a kid.
You know Crazy, so that doesaffect you.
So there's the poverty, there'sthe fact that you go into a
world you're not prepared for atall and you become a target.
Speaker 3 (30:07):
Are there any support systems at all, like when you?
Speaker 2 (30:10):
Well, I'm part of groups like survivors groups,
and so we do support each otherand talk and share things and
and so within ourselves,informally, there's definitely
support and and you do have to,you do have to seek help yeah,
yeah because it affects onlyaspects of your life, yeah
Speaker 3 (30:28):
it's just, it's such a thing that like we, that like
you, and I say mike, I mean I, Imean I grew up catholic and
some people, to some peoplethat's a cult, but I would argue
it's very much not I mean asmuch as they have religious
beliefs and things like that.
It's also the largest charity inthe world.
Yeah, um, I'm since elapsedcatholic for lots of reasons
(30:49):
that we don't need to get intoright now, but um it, uh, it's
one of those things where, frompeople like you and I look on
the outside and talking to somany people and everything,
there's things that you don'teven realize.
Yeah, so, for example, I was ata work function years ago and
(31:10):
how we start this show would bea problem for that guy.
Speaker 2 (31:14):
We started the show with the cheers cheers with
cheers and it was.
Speaker 3 (31:19):
I remember we had this work function and I we like
that particular person was hada beer, they drank beer and I
was like cheers bud and he'slike I don't do that and I was
like, oh, um, probably why.
It's like that's really.
You know.
I was like cheers bud and hewas like I don't do that and I
was like, oh, probably why.
I was like that's really youknow.
(31:39):
I was like do you hate me?
Like, and he was, and he justlooked at me and was like, well,
do you like actually, likeseriously want to know?
I was like, yes, I'm actuallygenuinely curious why you won't
cheers me, and he was like justpart of his beliefs.
Won't cheers me, and he waslike just part of his beliefs.
He was a part of a particularreligion that believes that when
you cheers, you are essentiallysummoning spirits like the the
(32:00):
goodwill of spirits or whateverit may be like you're summoning
whatever I see and you are notsupposed to dabble with spirits
at all period and story yeah, sonot, not even like in good
intentions kind of thing.
So he doesn't do that at allkind of thing, right, but that's
something that's so likeingrained, and even after he
told me that, I tried to makesure I remembered.
(32:20):
Yeah, uh, because I spent a lotof time with him, because he
was a colleague um, and I try toremember, but I still remember
there was one time where I wentI caught myself.
I was like, yeah, the guy nextto me cheers bud bud and I went,
uh, yep, yeah, you know what Imean.
Speaker 2 (32:34):
Yeah, but those are things like guys like us would
know, right, yeah, yeah, well,yeah, because it's like even
like the Catholic Church was onethat my particular sect
despised.
Yeah, because a lot of thestuff is pagan.
Speaker 3 (32:49):
That, yeah Right, because a lot of the stuff is
pagan yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Right yeah so yeah, Exactly yes.
So it's really it's all aboutfear.
Speaker 3 (32:58):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (32:58):
I think at the end of the day, that's what I knew
wasn't right.
Speaker 3 (33:03):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
That little voice inside me as a little girl was
just like I can't walk throughthe world, I can't carry my life
on based out of fear.
Speaker 1 (33:13):
Right yeah.
Speaker 2 (33:15):
Because it's so dark, it's so like.
It's just not the way I want tomove through.
The world is is based in fearand gloom and death and trauma
and like it's hard enough.
Speaker 1 (33:27):
Yeah.
Like life's hard enough so likegetting on to like years later
now.
Yeah, I mean's hard enough.
So like getting on to likeyears later now.
Yeah, I mean, you know you'vegone out of this thing.
Speaker 2 (33:34):
Congratulations Right For that, and you've had a good
life You've raised childrenYou've you know you've became a
mom.
Speaker 1 (33:40):
You've done a lot of wonderful things.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (33:42):
You hunted ghosts and you have a healing business.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Yeah, you have a healing business, okay.
Speaker 1 (33:48):
But so I guess now it's coming to a point where
you're, you know you must of me.
Now is the time for me to dothis, to share those stories.
Speaker 2 (34:14):
This book is based.
It does touch on the cult morein the way of because it's a
children's book, right?
So it touches it more as a wayof being a sensitive, gifted
child and because of the church,the cult, it suppressed my
natural gifts and so it's thosestories about how, basically, I
(34:39):
had to suppress things and thenhow I came back into bringing
those back into my life.
Speaker 1 (34:46):
So was the theme of the book like letting go of
those suppressions, or how wereyou teaching through the book
like letting go of thosesuppressions, or how are?
Speaker 2 (34:52):
you teaching through the book?
Yeah, so basically, I wanted towrite the book because I wanted
to help kids like me, kids whodo experience, because I did
experience the spirit world whenI was a kid and I got asked
like how are they going to findthis book?
Speaker 1 (35:05):
Because I mean obviously the places that
protect it.
You know are going to keep itaway from them, right, if they
want to figure this out, like,are you going to try to get in
public libraries, or what's likethis?
Speaker 2 (35:13):
yeah, that's my next step is libraries, bookstores,
right now it's, you know,available on amazon and my
publisher's uh website, but it's.
But it's not even like kids whoare in a cult, just people who
kids who say are born to parentsthat are not into spiritual
stuff at all right and theydon't get why their kids so like
talking to their imaginaryfriend named billy you know what
(35:37):
I mean like so because when yousay you're experiencing these
things and then you have adults,parents or you know some people
who you look up to say that itdoesn't exist, then what happens
?
You shut that down becauseyou're told it's not real.
(35:58):
So those are the kids that Iwrote this book for.
Is the kids to be like that?
If you are experiencing thesethings, it's not necessarily
wrong.
Speaker 1 (36:11):
So it could be a kid that just doesn't maybe believe
in the religion that's in hisfamily or her family.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Yeah, or maybe they're just born to parents who
don't have any kind of spirit,communication or super like.
Speaker 1 (36:20):
Not into this at all, but they are it sounds
interesting and I can take thisout if you don't want to do it.
What Did you want?
To read a little bit of thebook, like just on the show I
can Like like just on the show.
I can Like any part of the bookyou wanted to share with us.
I was just going to get it uphere because Matt sent it to me
on the drive up and I haven'thad a chance to listen to it yet
.
Speaker 2 (36:36):
I know I should have said this.
The story is called Whispersfrom the Farm.
Speaker 3 (36:41):
Well, that's the thing.
So actually I can even justbefore she reads it there.
So so tanya is a survivor, ahealer and a guide for women
reclaiming their power.
After breaking free from adoomsday religion that
suppressed her intuitive andhealing gifts, she forged her
own path, raising threedaughters as a single mother,
while rediscovering her strengthtoday as a leader in divine
(37:04):
feminine healing.
Tanya empowers women throughnaturopathy, transformative
retreats and education.
So that's what you wrote in theback kind of like a description
of you yeah um, which, which I Imean honestly reading that, I
think a lot of people wouldgravitate towards.
I think that speaks a lot ofpeople yeah um, but yeah, we can
pull up uh trying to pull it uphere.
Speaker 1 (37:24):
It's uh taking a really long time to load.
Speaker 2 (37:26):
Maybe you're gonna have more luck on your phone now
maybe yeah it's hard to say wehave all this interference who
illustrated the book mypublisher okay people, who does
that, who did the illustrations,and and he he deals a lot with
heavy subjects.
That's part of the reason Iwent with him is that he does
(37:49):
deal with okay heavy subjectsand puts it in a in a way that
children can consume it, I guessright without probably I want
that too small to read rightthere right from the beginning
oh, I could probably read that.
I just have to.
Okay, I can try here.
Um, tanya had always feltdifferent.
(38:09):
A tender thread woven into thefabric of a rural hobby farm,
nestled far from the clamor oftown life.
To her family she was toosensitive.
Excuse me, it's funny.
My throat started closing offwhen I said that.
Something to be tamed.
But to her the gentle sway ofthe willow trees, the rustle of
(38:32):
the corn and the silentcommunication with the animals.
So what this is speaking to isthe fact that I am very
sensitive, very soft-hearted,and raising animals and
(39:02):
slaughtering animals and alsobeing sensitive to spirit.
Communication in my childhoodwas not okay, right?
So I talk in the book about howthere were certain gifts I came
into like scrying through andyou guys would have seen a scry
(39:22):
when we did the ghost hunt wherewe looked into the mirror and
then things would appear.
Speaker 1 (39:27):
Well.
Speaker 2 (39:27):
I was doing that at five years old in the bathroom.
I never even heard of it orseen of it.
I just knew that when I lookedin the mirror and the light was
a certain way, I could seefigures.
Speaker 1 (39:37):
Sounds like the end of a movie.
Stuck in a cult seeing ghostsin the mirror.
Speaker 3 (39:42):
Yeah, Well, and in your book I mean because I went
through it and everything likethis afternoon and I did see
that like kind of speaking tothat spiritual side of things, I
know, when you left and thenyou end up becoming a mother
with your kids, you end upbuying we talked about there,
you bought like a farmhouse.
And in the book it talks abouthow everything seemed great at
first.
Yeah, it literally like thissounds like the plot of a horror
(40:04):
story Right, it's likeeverything seemed great at first
.
They moved to this new town inthe country.
Speaker 1 (40:08):
Exactly, but then all of a sudden she started hearing
voices, yeah.
But literally that's whathappened to you, though, yeah.
Speaker 3 (40:15):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:15):
Yeah, because I had to shut all that down.
So imagine being raised in this, this cult.
It'd be right.
And then, all of a sudden,you're saying like oh mom, I'm
seeing my ancestors behind me,I'm talking to great, great,
great grandmother.
Speaker 3 (40:28):
Right.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
And like mother and right, like no, that's a demon.
So you shut that stuff down,right, you just shut it down
because it's scary.
Yeah, like this, thing that younaturally do is all of a sudden
bad and it's scary, so I shutit down.
For years I had to yeah so, um,when I started having my
daughters is when it justfinally came back because they
were experiencing things.
Speaker 3 (40:52):
Oh, okay.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
So, like, what do you do?
I had to tap into this stufffrom my childhood of like, okay,
I've got to protect my kids,I've got to figure out what's
going on, because my middledaughter was communicating and
not having a good experience.
I was having things walk up tome.
Things smashed in the cup, likeit was really like heavy-duty
(41:17):
stuff.
Speaker 1 (41:17):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
So I had to go.
Okay, I got to bring this stuffback online because I have to
protect my kids.
I have to figure this outbecause I don't want to live
like that, you know, scared.
I don't want to be in fearagain.
Speaker 1 (41:30):
Yeah, yeah, I get that.
Speaker 2 (41:32):
Yeah, you know, scared, I don't want to be in
fear again.
Yeah, yeah, so, yeah.
So then that that's what reallyspurred.
Speaker 1 (41:35):
Well, it was always there, like I was always
experiencing things, but I justhave you had any time like, have
you tried like conventionaltherapies and stuff, or would?
You always find no, no, I'mjust asking not to be rude, you
need help.
Speaker 2 (41:46):
No, no, no, no.
I'm just curious.
Speaker 1 (41:48):
I'm asking out of kindness, like, did you try
going to see like a therapist atany point?
Speaker 2 (41:53):
For like the cult deprogramming kind of stuff.
Yeah, for all of it.
Yeah, because I mean it wouldjust kind of just see how you
know, all this manifested inyour mind.
Speaker 1 (42:03):
It must have.
Speaker 2 (42:04):
I mean, I went to therapy for some stuff, for sure
, but like this was more, thiswas just different, like this.
You have to understand.
This is how I experienced theworld as a child, so it wasn't
anything scary it wasn'tanything right different it was
just something I had and thenhad to shut down, and then it.
It's what made sense to me yeah,yeah right, like it's what,
(42:25):
it's what made sense, and so, um, and then, like you said, like
your kids are experiencing this.
You never talked about it.
Why are you know?
All of a sudden they haveimaginary friends that play with
the toys in the closet whennobody's there in the middle of
the night.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (42:40):
Do you know how to explain that?
So that really woke that partup.
Speaker 1 (42:44):
How are the kids now?
Are they still kind of feelingthat stuff?
Speaker 2 (42:48):
Not as much.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
No.
Speaker 2 (42:49):
No, they kind of.
I think sometimes you just go,I just don't need to do this and
to exist in this world rightnow right, so that's what I did
too maybe it's interesting whathappens when they have children
down the road.
Speaker 1 (43:02):
Yeah, yeah, maybe you know the cycle will keep
repeating.
Yeah, it could be.
Speaker 2 (43:07):
I just think some people are born more sensitive
than others and they experiencethings differently they.
The world is just a littledifferent for them, and so
either you suppress who younaturally are or you don't.
Speaker 1 (43:18):
And.
Speaker 2 (43:18):
I think there's a lot of misery that comes with
suppressing who you are.
Speaker 1 (43:22):
I believe that.
Yeah, I believe that too, yeah.
Speaker 2 (43:24):
And so that's really what it's about.
It's like to, if you areexperiencing the world this way,
you're not broken.
You're not broken, you're notwrong, you're not possessed by a
demon, right right, like thishas brought me a lot of joy in
my life and a lot ofunderstanding of the spiritual
world.
And it's like I study ancientmystics.
(43:45):
I study like I'm not.
It's not just like wooey, let'sget a crystal and put it right
through the eye, like you know,like I study like esoteric, the
masters, like a lot of some ofthe stuff you know starting to
be scientifically proven.
So it's not as like mysticalScience is starting to actually
speak to some of this stuff.
Speaker 1 (44:05):
It's fascinating stuff, yeah it really is yeah
100% yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:09):
It's blending quantum physics and science with the
mystery.
Speaker 1 (44:13):
I also say it's getting really hot in this
closet.
Yeah, keep the door closed.
Speaker 2 (44:17):
Yeah, so Whispers from the Farm is what the book
is called, yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:21):
So, and you said, it's available on the
publisher's website and it'savailable online on Amazon.
Speaker 2 (44:26):
On Amazon yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:27):
So yeah, so definitely keep an eye out for
that.
I say we move right into our 10questions because our 10
questions are definitely goingto trigger some things, I'm sure
.
Speaker 2 (44:36):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (44:36):
So question number one I'll kick it off.
So what other avenues in lifedo you see cult style behavior?
Speaker 2 (44:45):
Well, I see a lot like politics.
Speaker 3 (44:48):
That's where I see it , yep.
Speaker 2 (44:49):
I see a lot of it in these multi-level marketing
companies.
Speaker 3 (44:52):
I can see that stuff too, these MLM companies.
Speaker 2 (44:54):
There's serious cult behavior there.
I can see that, yeah, it's likeours is the best and that's it.
And and like we're only friendswith each other.
Speaker 3 (45:08):
And, like there's a lot of blindly follow somebody I
mean I.
You know, some people may ormay love this or hate this, but
I firmly believe that trump is acult that's that's my thought,
not republicans yeah, mega,because right they.
I see so much of it where it'slike you watch these people go
in there and they talk to themand they say like, hey, you
(45:29):
think this.
And they're like, oh, yeah, Ithink this.
And then they prove to themthat they're wrong.
Like they prove the opposite ofwhat they think, and they're
still like nah no that's not itand you're wrong.
Like.
That's a lie, that's fake news,right.
Speaker 2 (45:41):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (45:42):
So that is like I see so much.
Speaker 2 (45:45):
But I could say that about Trudeau, people who
believe Trudeau too, about a lotof stuff.
And so I think, honestly, it'sall of them.
Speaker 3 (45:51):
It is all of them, don't get me wrong.
It exists in all of it.
I just see it more in in MAGAthan I see it anything else.
Speaker 2 (46:03):
But yes, I see it anything else but?
Speaker 3 (46:04):
yes, every single person who blindly because there
are people blindly follows anypolitical party, like the real
party subscribers, where it'slike have you ever have you
voted for anyone else in thelast 20 years?
No, right?
Speaker 2 (46:14):
why right?
But that's the differencebetween, like, free thinkers.
Yeah, right, because what'shappening there is, like are
these even your thoughts?
Like, and that happens with allsorts of things now I find like
cancel culture like it's like,come on, like okay, fine, that's
not your style of comedy, butdo we have to cancel the dude
just to watch it?
Speaker 3 (46:34):
you know what?
Don't watch it.
There was a comedian and I'veactually kind of subscribed to
this now.
It was comedian said there's nosuch thing as cancel culture
you just change your audience.
Speaker 2 (46:43):
Yeah, I kind of believe that now yeah, but it's
that idea no that idea of cancelculture, of just basically like
you don't believe what Ibelieve, so that's it.
You're, you're done and it'slike.
Personally, I like flavor, Ilike differences and if, if I
can't have a conversation withyou and not get mad, then is it
(47:05):
my actual belief system, or whoam I trying to convince myself,
or you?
Because either you really feelthat, or you don't, and you're
just trying to regurgitate whatyou've heard, I would have
canceled this conversation andmoved to question number two.
Question number two.
Question number two.
Speaker 1 (47:23):
What's your favorite movie?
Speaker 2 (47:24):
My favorite movie.
Oh God, there's so many.
Just one movie that you loveLord of the Rings.
Lord of the Rings Cool.
I'm a huge Tolkien fan, oh manyou're one out of three.
Speaker 1 (47:33):
We're not Lords of the Rings fans here.
No that's not true.
You like it or person right, no, I'm a big.
Tolkien fan.
It's okay, though, yeah, allright.
Speaker 3 (47:43):
Question number three , just with the hobbits and
stuff.
All right, so question numberthree.
This is a direct throwback toyou.
How do you think the world willend?
Speaker 2 (47:52):
How do I think the world will end?
Oh God, I don't think it will.
No, no, okay, I don't think itwill.
Speaker 3 (48:00):
I mean, I think it will.
It'll just be like 4 billionyears from now.
Speaker 2 (48:03):
Yeah, and I think we'll just start again.
It'll be the sixth extensionand we'll start again.
Speaker 3 (48:09):
Yeah, it's just cycles.
That's true.
That's how I see it.
Speaker 2 (48:11):
It's just cycles, robots, yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:13):
I mean energy or robots.
Speaker 1 (48:24):
Or robots the other.
Speaker 3 (48:24):
So there is a theory that there's been multiple big
bangs.
So there is that.
Yeah, all right.
Oh, it's your turn, matt.
Speaker 1 (48:27):
No, I just asked that question, okay, question number
four okay, this is a question,a terrible question, because
while we were here, they have atrailer park boys special burger
, yeah, so they kept playing thetrailer park boys theme song
over and over again here at theplace to celebrate the burger
that just came out today.
So it was a lot of hearing thesame song over and over again.
But if you had to listen to onesong forever, what would it be?
Speaker 2 (48:50):
Oh, these are hard questions.
Speaker 1 (48:53):
I just like so many different things, just one song
you could listen to On repeatfor a while.
Speaker 2 (49:00):
Music.
I don't think I can answer that.
No, you really can't.
I can't answer that, no, no,you really can't.
That's all right, I love music.
Speaker 1 (49:06):
We'd say take a drink .
But we left them in the otherroom.
We finished them.
We already finished them.
Speaker 3 (49:11):
Okay, we'll go to the next question then.
Yeah, have you ever beenstarstruck if you met a ghost
that was famous?
You ever been a littlestarstruck who was like a famous
?
Speaker 2 (49:24):
celebrity.
So who would be?
Who would be edgar casey?
Speaker 3 (49:29):
edgar casey edgar he's the, the.
Speaker 2 (49:32):
He has the largest collection of psychic readings
in the world okay, and he wascalled the sleeping prophet okay
he would go into these, thesetrans-like states, and give
incredible readings that wereaccurate, okay cool and he died
in basic poverty because he didit for free, for people to help
him.
Speaker 3 (49:50):
Oh, wow, yeah, Edgar Cayce, so okay.
So if you're saying, if youever met him in ghost form, you
would be, starstruck.
Speaker 2 (49:58):
I'd be like, oh my God, Okay, all right.
Speaker 1 (50:00):
Oh my God, Over here, mike, okay, all right.
Do you believe in aliens?
Speaker 2 (50:05):
yes 100.
Speaker 1 (50:06):
Yeah, me too.
Yeah, yeah, why not?
That's another podcast.
Speaker 3 (50:10):
I have a few experiences anyway, moving on,
we'll see you again, uh oh, Ithink there's one that we
skipped over, but I'll go backto it.
Um, do you believe in evolution?
Speaker 2 (50:21):
evolution in the form of like like.
What do you mean by that?
Monkey to man, fish to mammalno little brains forming in the
ocean, little brains turninginto little brains getting fins
no, I believe in creation littlebrains getting, but not in
creation in the religious sense.
No, okay, so, okay.
So you believe in creation.
I believe in a grand design.
Speaker 1 (50:44):
Ooh, damn.
Okay, there's blends, it's aspectrum.
I'm more of an evolution guy.
I think We'll see you know whatthough.
There can be both.
What there can be bothEvolution yeah, there can be
both.
Speaker 3 (50:56):
There really can be both.
There can be both.
Um, not neil degrasse tyson,but the uh, the british guy with
the, the long hair kind ofthing.
He was talking about that andsaid that there.
Even though he firmly believesin evolution and science and
everything he said, that doesn'tmean he's not that there's not
creation as well, and vice versa.
Speaker 2 (51:13):
Just because creation does not mean there's not.
Speaker 1 (51:15):
We're evolving right now, yeah yes like we are so I
believe this podcast of alltonight it sure it sure did.
Speaker 3 (51:23):
It went from ape to human pretty quick.
Speaker 1 (51:28):
All right, okay, where are we at here?
Scariest place you've ever been.
I always feel like that was thecult place.
Well, it's probably the worstplace you've ever been.
Speaker 3 (51:37):
Stop answering questions for her, sorry, yeah,
yeah.
Speaker 1 (51:40):
I'll try.
Speaker 3 (51:41):
Like scariest place I've ever been.
Yeah sorry.
Speaker 2 (51:47):
Yeah, I'll try like scariest place I've ever been.
Speaker 1 (51:48):
Yeah uh, ghost hunted .
Speaker 2 (51:48):
Yeah, that's a.
That's super.
Yeah, that's scary.
Yeah, I'd probably say freetown, state forest in the, in
the states there's.
That was like really terrifying.
But we were paranormalinvestigating so we kind of went
there on purpose okay, that'slegit.
Speaker 1 (52:02):
This one one required a little psychic power onto you
, matt.
Speaker 3 (52:05):
Yes, that's right, because this is coming out
within the time frame of it.
I figured I'd throw this outthere.
Who will win the Stanley Cup?
Florida or Edmonton?
Speaker 2 (52:15):
You're asking an Alberta girl.
So what do you think?
Oh God, I don't even followsports.
Speaker 3 (52:22):
Just so you know, as we sit here on.
Friday the 13th it is tied 2-2.
Speaker 2 (52:27):
2-2.
Yeah, with three games left, soit's the best of the three
series.
Right now I say Edmondson Allright, there you go.
I like it.
That could just be my Albertblood coming out.
There you go, last question.
Speaker 1 (52:38):
Yeah, last, yeah, last question.
We ask every guest, this onewhat's one piece of advice you
were given that you would liketo share with us or to others
listening today?
Piece of advice you got itthrough your life, at any point.
Speaker 2 (52:50):
Honestly, just authenticity.
Don't be scared to be weird, Ilike that I like that.
Just be authentically yourself,even if it because the right
people will find you.
You don't want people in yourlife that aren't going to accept
you for all your weirdness.
Speaker 3 (53:04):
I love that.
You should actually like maket-shirts that says don't be
scared to be weird.
Yeah, I think that could catchon.
Speaker 1 (53:11):
There you go.
Yeah, scared to be weird,cheers everyone.
This is a lovely thing we'regoing to cheers on high fives.
Speaker 3 (53:21):
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much, thank you.
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