August 2, 2024 • 53 mins
What would you do if life threw one medical challenge after another your way? Explore the incredible resilience of Emmilia O'Sullivan, whose journey is nothing short of awe-inspiring. On this episode of "Against All Odds, the Less Than 1% Chance," we dive into Emmilia's early life battling kidney disease, her father's life-saving kidney donation, and a series of complex surgeries that tested her strength at every turn. Emmilia's pursuit of health is a testament to the indomitable human spirit, sparking inspiration in every listener.
Emmilia and her husband faced an emotional rollercoaster in their quest to start a family. From grappling with a pituitary gland tumor to enduring the trials of fertility treatments and the complexities of surrogacy and adoption, their journey is filled with highs and lows. Despite these hurdles, Emmilia's unwavering optimism and reliance on community support shine brightly. Her story underscores the importance of trust, relaxation, and finding joy in unexpected moments, offering valuable insights for anyone navigating similar paths.
Embracing her new reality with profound positivity, Emmilia opens up about the emotional and physical challenges she encountered, including the impact on her self-confidence following multiple surgeries. She shares how self-care, maintaining a positive outlook, and developing daily habits have contributed to her overall well-being. As Emmilia reflects on her journey approaching her 30th birthday, she leaves us with a powerful message of resilience over victimhood, appreciation for life's small pleasures, and the strength derived from overcoming adversity. Tune in to be inspired by Emmilia’s incredible journey and the enduring power of positivity.
Find Emmilia:
Instagram: @emmiliaosullivan
Facebook: Emmilia O'Sullivan
Tiktok: emmiliaosullivan
Website: www.emmiliaosullivan.com
Find her book on her website above!
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Follow Maria on YouTube HERE
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Welcome back to the Against All Odds the Less Than
1% Chance podcast with your host, maria Aponte, where we will
hear stories of incrediblepeople thriving against all odds
, and my hope is that we can allsee how life is always
happening for us, even when weare the Less Than 1% Chance.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hey, hey, welcome back to Against All Odds, the
Less Than 1% Chance podcast withyour host, maria Aponte.
I hope you're doing fantastictoday.
I wanted to just I wanna take amoment because I have my second
international guest on and I amso excited.
I just chatted with her alittle bit prior to, and you
(00:42):
guys are in for such a treattoday.
So Amelia O'Sullivan is aninspirational young lady who has
faced life's challenges head onand always does so with
positivity and humor, which isalso needed.
She is full of life,enthusiastic and very passionate
about providing support topeople like her that have been
through horrendous medicalissues and diagnosis.
(01:04):
In Amelia's short 30 years, shehas endured more than one
person would experience in theirentire lifetime, including.
There's a ton of things on here, so I'm going to say a few, but
there's a kidney transplant,spinal fusion, neck dissections,
cardiac arrest oh my goodness.
Non-hodgkin's lymphoma,pneumonia, sepsis and oh my gosh
(01:29):
.
Let's just say I'm going togive her the space to speak a
little bit more about all thethings that she has been through
, but she has defied all oddsover and over again.
She is here to tell her storyand really, when she got to the
point where she can maybe writea book.
She did, and so she's got abook that she wrote and is
(01:51):
promoting now.
So I am so excited becauseafter this I am going to get it
immediately.
But the book is called I shouldbe effing dead, which is so
funny because I, literally a fewdays ago, from this recording I
posted, I was, I almost diedfive times, and it's so crazy
(02:13):
that this is the.
You see, when we put our energyat that vibration of you know
what, I'm just going to go thereand you attract the people that
you're supposed to have in yourlife, for whatever reason it
may be.
So welcome Em.
I'm so excited to have you Giveus a little bit of background of
(02:35):
your story, and I know thatyou've been through a lot of
things, so I want to hear just alittle bit of your background.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Of course.
Thank you so much for having me, and I'm so honored to be your
first Australian guest.
Oh, where do I even start?
I suppose the start's a goodplace.
I was born with kidney diseaseand had my right kidney removed
and lived most of my life on onekidney.
I was fine.
I lived a main, proper childlife.
(03:03):
It wasn't until I was about 15or 16, and that's when my kidney
was at 20% function.
The problem that we were facingwas that I was having reflux
from my bladder going up to mykidney and damaging it.
I was also very prone toinfections, so that was also
(03:23):
damaging it damaging it.
I was also very prone toinfections, so that was also
damaging it.
So I had my specialists and Iwas told that I would have to
have a kidney transplant.
The problem we were facing was,though, if I was to have a
kidney transplant, it was justthe same thing was going to
happen Everything was going toget damaged again because of the
bladder.
So when I was 17, I had my firstmajor major well, actually my
(03:45):
second major surgery.
So my first one was when I hadmy kidney removed and they had
to reconstruct my whole bladder.
So they cut open my bladder,they grabbed a bit of my
intestine, made it bigger androunder and it actually fixed
the issue.
So I was happy it was allrecovering.
And then we still had thiskidney issue because again it
(04:06):
was only at 20%.
So four years later it declinedand I had to have the
transplant.
I got a transplant from my dad,so it was very lucky and
fortunate because in Australiait's I'm not too sure what it's
like in America, but in thewaiting list is very long, it's
five to seven years and also inAustralia you have to opt to be
(04:32):
a donor.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:35):
Whereas in a lot of other countries you're
automatically a donor and thenyou have to opt out.
So we are trying to get that inAustralia, so hopefully it
happens.
But anyway, I had the kidneytransplant and again it all
worked perfectly fine.
I was all recovering and I hada good working kidney.
And it was about eight or ninemonths later and I started to go
(04:56):
back to the gym.
So I had to get fit and healthyagain.
I was on a steroid and thatmade me put on a lot of weight,
about 12 kilos.
I wasn't used to it.
So I thought, right, I'm goingto really get into my health now
.
So I changed my diet, I startedgoing to the gym and then I got
this knee pain and I went toall these different doctors and
(05:19):
I went to emergency a few times,got sent home with painkillers,
scan after scan, and everyone'stelling me there's nothing
wrong, you've just gone to thegym, you've injured yourself,
don't worry about it, you'll befine.
Anyway, it got to the pointwhere I was sitting upright and
I couldn't even lay down.
I was in excruciating pain andI thought, no, this is not
(05:40):
normal, like I need something, Ineed to do something.
So I actually went to myprevious kidney specialist at
the time and I explained to himthat I couldn't lay down and he
said well, that's strange.
Why would it get worse if I waslaying down?
It's in the knee.
So he goes look, I'm going toorder a full body CT scan.
And I thought, okay, let's doit.
(06:01):
So I did that.
And I thought, okay, let's doit.
So I did that and I got a callthe next day and he said you
need to go straight to hospital.
I've got a bed booked in foryou, go there, I'll meet you
there later.
I thought, okay, well, theyfound something.
Obviously I had no idea what itwas, so, packed, everything,
went to the hospital and theystarted testing further.
So they did a PET scan.
(06:22):
I had a little lump in my groinarea, so they did a biopsy.
They did a bone marrow biopsy.
So by the time they did allthese tests, a week had gone
past.
I was in a hospital for a week.
Then my kidney doctor walked inwith a hematologist so a blood
cancer or blood doctor and theylooked at me and they pretty
much said you've been diagnosedwith stage three non-Hodgkin's
(06:45):
lymphoma.
And I've just looked at themand I've gone okay.
So what's the treatment andwhen do we start?
And they're like they justlooked at me and was like, well,
is that all you got to say?
I'm like, yeah, I want to knowthe treatment now.
I want to know how long it'sgoing to take, because I want to
hurry up and do this treatment,because I want to move on with
(07:05):
my life.
I've got things to do.
Everyone around me is crying.
My parents and my boyfriend atthe time were just distraught,
and I was the rock when I wasgoing through everything.
And so this was on a Wednesday.
I remember the day, and byFriday, three days later, I was
on the chemotherapy wardstarting my first treatment and
chemotherapy.
So that lasted six months andthen I was in remission.
(07:30):
So I was happy.
I beat it.
I didn't really strugglethroughout the chemo.
The only thing I believe it ornot was when I lost my hair.
That's what I really struggledwith, because I suppose being a
female, it's your form ofidentity, right?
And when it's coming out inclumps uncontrollably, you start
to freak out.
So I ended up getting a blondewig.
(07:51):
It was my opportunity to goblonde.
Yes, was it more fun it was morefun at the time, and I got my
auntie at the time she was ahairdresser back in the day and
I said we're shaving it.
And she goes, why, why just letit fall out?
And I said, no, I want to be incontrol, it's not going to be
on my terms.
Um, so that's it.
(08:12):
We shaved it and I put the wigon and then I was okay, I was
fine.
So this brings us, yeah,towards the end of 2015 now, and
I was in remission for thelymphoma, but they had found
tumors in my liver and they'relike, well, that's strange.
So they biopsied them andthey're called EBV driven smooth
(08:34):
muscle tumors, so theEpstein-Barr virus, which is
also known as the glandularfever virus, that was driving
these tumors and they had noidea what they were.
They had no idea how to treatthem.
I think still to this day, I'mthe only one in Australia that
is diagnosed with them.
Yeah, so it was trial and errorand it was well, what do we do?
(08:57):
And at this point in time, theywere only in the liver, and so
we did an internal radiationtherapy, where they directly
inject radiation internally, andthey I suppose the students had
a mixed response.
Some of them went quiet, wentaway, some of them just went
inactive and some of them werestill there.
(09:18):
So we thought, okay, well, whatelse can we do?
And then there was a medicationat the time where it had well,
there was research and it saidthat it had properties to try
and get rid of tumors orsuppress the tumors.
So we thought, okay, we'll trythat.
We tried that, but it actuallyhad the opposite effect in me.
It actually grew them more andthey started developing in all
(09:42):
other areas, so other areaswhere in my head, in my neck, in
my spine, in my lung, in mybladder, they were everywhere.
But this particular tumordoesn't spread by the
bloodstream, so they're all newoccurrences.
So I said to the doctors, I saidno, I don't want this
medication anymore, take me offit.
So we we removed that and thenwe thought, well, what do we do
(10:05):
now?
And then more research was doneand it was actually one of my
specialists.
We've got a cancer hospitalhere in Victoria, in Melbourne,
and it's called the PeterMcCallum Cancer Centre.
So they had some contacts inAmerica and there was a trial of
T cell therapy, but thistherapy was targeted for the EBV
(10:28):
virus.
So I was actually having stuffflown from America to Australia
and I was having this treatmentand again I got a mixed response
.
Everything's died down a littlebit and I was okay and they
were all stable and I was happywith that.
I said look, they can livethere as long as they don't
cause me any harm.
Exactly, as long as they're notmessing with that, I said look,
they can live there as long asthey don't cause me any harm,
exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
As long as they're not messing with me.
I got this.
I got it they can stay there.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
So we did some of that therapy and then I went on
a holiday to Sri Lanka and whenwe got back I felt very ill and
went into hospital and I endedup getting pneumonia.
And pneumonia is horrible.
It is so painful and I wouldn'twish it on anyone, to be honest
.
Anyway, as I was doing testing,they found a tumor in my lungs
(11:13):
so that had to get removed.
Got that removed, had fiverounds of radiation all good, so
I was fine with that.
And then I started getting lotsof bladder infections, and
that's when we discovered theone in the bladder, so we had to
get that one removed.
Then a few years had passed, soI was in and out of hospital
(11:34):
having various treatments, andthen I got to the end of 2019
and I was stable enough.
Everything was coming backclear, my scans were stable, and
my husband and I thought well,let's go for let's family plan,
let's think about starting afamily of our own.
Now I had a rod in my arm.
It's called the implanon rod.
(11:55):
It's a contraception rod andthat was due to come out.
So I got it taken out and Ididn't get my menstrual cycle
back.
It was three months later, so Iwent to the doctors and said
well, it's not back.
Oh, let's just give it anotherthree months.
I said, okay, well, fair enough.
So we waited another three, sosix months in total, and still
(12:15):
not back.
So more testing did a bloodtest of all my hormones, and
they were just zero.
There was nothing there.
And then that led to an MRI onmy head area and then I got
called in again immediately andso you've got your brain, and
then you've got your pituitarygland, which is just under your
(12:38):
brain and that regulates allyour hormones.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
As you probably already know, that's what the
signals that yeah, and thesignal yeah, so that stalk, so
it.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
Basically I had a tumor that was sitting in that
area below the brain and it waspushing on the stalk so it was
damaging the stalk.
So I was never, ever going toget my period and still don't
now.
So the week later I had to havea craniotomy.
So they cut my head open all onthis.
My right side removed theremoved the tumor well, 90
something percent of the tumorand then a week later they went
(13:09):
through my nose and did atransphenoidal surgery to remove
the rest of my tumor.
Then I had to have a skin graftto fix all the inside of that
area.
But as a result my nerve gotcut.
So my right eyelid doesn't goup or down oh my gosh.
So it's permanently shut nowand my confidence was just way
(13:32):
like below low.
I wasn't even confident tobegin with, and let alone this
has happened.
So I was so grateful thatthey'd removed 100% of the tumor
and that was gone.
But I had to face thisconfidence issue now and I
initially like wore like amakeup remover pad, eye patch
sort of thing and just pretendedI had an eye surgery, just so
(13:53):
people wouldn't ask I would tryand cover it up, I wouldn't be
going out as much.
I'm a very social person.
I love going out, but I didn'teven want to go down to the
supermarket.
That that's how bad I was.
And then I said to myself no,amelia, you need to get out Like
, this is your life now.
You need to accept it.
So I changed my mind, mypositive thinking, and accepted
(14:16):
it and said well, no, you knowwhat I haven't changed as a
person?
Yeah, I might physically lookdifferent, but I'm still me.
That was a lot to get through,but I got through it all.
And then I learned that peoplewere just staring because they
were curious, I think yeah, Idon't think they were doing it
in a bad way.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
I think that people because they're not used to, and
I feel like when we're in gradeschool it's the teasing, but as
we're older, I don't think it'seven the teasing, it's the
curiosity and like, what's herstory?
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
So in the end now I just walk in with confidence,
pretend it's not even there andmost people don't even look
anymore, so just having to havethat inner confidence.
So I was recovering from thatand I was all good.
And then a couple of monthslater I had to have the routine
scan to make sure everything wasgood.
And I said to the doctorsbecause I had tumors all on the
(15:14):
sides of my neck and I said, oh,it's bulging and it's really
uncomfortable I go, can we justdo a scan just to see for future
if I can get them removed andthey're like yeah, why not?
So did that and then again gotcalled in a week later and I
thought, oh god, they've foundsomething now.
And turns out that my c5vertebrae had a little tumor in
(15:36):
it and fractured it.
I had no symptoms, nothing.
They're like are you in pain?
Anyway, I said no, I wasactually running a fish and chip
takeaway shop with my parentsat the time, so it was quite
physical oh my gosh, I wasrunning around and doing that.
So, yeah, I didn't, I'd knownothing, nothing was indicating
that I had a fractured vertebrae.
(15:56):
So, again, I was scheduled forsurgery and so they did a neck
dissection where they removedthe tumors on both sides and
then they put a cage in thefront to try and stabilize the
spine.
Yeah, but because of myprevious use of steroids, my
bones are not very good.
They're quite weak.
So two days later they had todo a fusion.
(16:18):
So they did a fusion from c2 tot1.
So I believe that's like eightlevels or something like that
seven or eight levels my god soI was back to square one and I
had to go through physical rehaband I couldn't eat or talk for
a good month because they movedmy vocal cord.
Um, I was on a puree diet, soessentially a baby diet.
(16:39):
Yeah, just everything.
And I suppose what I learnedfrom that was that you take the
little things for granted, likethe ability to take a step or
the ability to swallow somewater or something.
It's just an everyday thingthat you just do subconsciously,
and when you suddenly can't dothat, you realize.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
It makes you appreciate life so much.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
Absolutely, it does.
So again, I was in rehab andpersonal training and got myself
good, so it was all good andthen.
So then we come to thefollowing year and I'm 30, so
I'm 31 now and I'm just about toturn 30 years old.
So I had my party and I lovedit so much.
And then we hit November, andit was one Sunday morning I
(17:23):
remember it clearly, it wasNovember the 20th in 2022.
And I'd woken up and I wasn'tfeeling the best, and so I said
to my husband look, I'm going tohave a shower, I'm just going
to go back to bed and rest.
And he goes, that's fine.
And he went out to do yard work.
He never does yard work, ever.
I'm going to embrace this.
(17:43):
You go out there, I'll rest,we'll be fine anyway.
A few hours later, he'd come tocheck on me and I was in a pool
of sweat, but I was shivering atthe same time.
I didn't really know what wasgoing on.
I was super thirsty and but Ididn't want to drink.
I didn't feel like drinking,let alone eating, and I was, I
(18:04):
know, like I felt this before.
I knew it was happening becauseI had sepsis multiple times and
I knew right, I think I've gotsepsis again.
So I said to my husband look,pack my hospital bag, I'll go
use the bathroom and then you'llhave to take me to hospital.
He goes okay.
And I went to try and get up andI was just so dizzy I couldn't
even walk.
(18:25):
So I go.
Well, scrap that, I can't dothat.
Tried to walk to the car,couldn't do that either.
So I said to my husband well, Ithink you're gonna have to call
the ambulance now.
Within the space of half and Iwas conscious to pretty much
almost passing out and my heartrate hit like 150 or 160.
My blood pressure dropped my.
(18:46):
I check my blood pressureregularly because of my kidney
and the machine wasn't evendetecting my heart rate.
I'm sorry, my blood pressure ohmy gosh.
So when the ambulance came, theychecked and it was in like the
80s or something, so it was verylow.
So I was rushed straight toemergency lights and sirens and
all I remember is being wheeledinto the emergency department,
(19:09):
into the resuscitation room, andthen I remember all these
doctors poking and prodding me,trying to get a line into me as
in a drip, and then that's it.
I don't remember anything else.
So turns out that I was putinto an induced coma, because
when you've got sepsis it's theinfection that enters your
bloodstream and starts shuttingdown all your organs and you're
(19:32):
very prone to brain damage aswell, because your brain's an
organ and it starts affectingthat.
So they put you into an inducedcoma to save you, basically.
But a couple of days into thecoma I suffered a cardiac arrest
because my blood pressure wasstill dropping.
So I think I was pretty muchunconscious for two and a half
(19:53):
minutes, and in the medicalworld that is huge Like two and
a half minutes could be life ordeath or brain damage or no
damage.
Anyway, thankfully I wasresuscitated, revived and I
wasn't out of the woods, thoughI got told afterwards from my
family that they got told everyday to say goodbye to me because
they didn't think I was goingto survive.
(20:13):
So that coma lasted seven daysand then they woke me up and I
remember waking up and I had thetube down my throat and my
first initial instinct was tograb the tube and rip it out.
And I've never seen a nurse runso quickly to grab shackles.
And they literally shackled meto the bed and was like no, you
can't do that.
(20:33):
And I couldn't speak because Ihad the tube down my throat
right.
So I'm just sitting there awakewith a tube down my throat in a
bed shackled.
So not only was I in hospital,I also felt like I was, you know
, in prison, like in prison.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Yeah, I was gonna say it's like you're in jail and
prison, and that's it.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
I was stuck to this bed and I was trying to talk and
I couldn't talk.
And then I grabbed my hand andI was trying to like it right
then, trying to write somethingin the air, and all I could hear
the nurse was saying don'tworry, like we're nearly gonna,
we're nearly going to, we'regoing to take it out, we're
going to take it out.
And I'm trying to say to himlike how soon?
Like I need it out.
I don't know how long time like.
For me it felt like hours.
It was probably only 15, 20minutes, but the biggest test
(21:13):
was was I going to survive oncethis tube was out?
And so that was the scariestthing, because I was awake and
conscious at this time, and Igot told it too, and my husband
was in the room with me andobviously I survived but they
pulled it out.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Obviously.
If not, this would be a totallydifferent show.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
Yes, and so they pulled it out and they put a
mask on me straight away and Itook a breath and everyone was
so happy and relieved.
And then some funny things thatI did afterwards was once I was
able to breathe and talk.
First thing I asked my husbandwas did you pay the gas bill?
And he just looked at me andgoes so that's all you got to
(21:58):
say.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
I'm like yeah, did you.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
Because I handle all the finances in our home.
I no idea like what he'd done.
That was pretty funny.
And then the second thing Isaid to him was I want to go for
a walk.
And he goes Amelia, you can'tlike if you've just seen what
you've been through, I don'tcare.
I'm like I want to go for awalk.
So the nurses came in and Ijust kept asking and they're
like well, you don't have anyshoes.
So my husband got in the car,went to my home, got shoes,
(22:23):
brought them back, they sat meout of bed and they gave me a
walker because obviously I wasso weak I couldn't, like
couldn't do anything.
I'm pretty sure they lifted meup so I was standing and then I
took like two steps and I waslike no, I'm done.
So I turned around and sat backinto the chair.
But the fact that I could situp and I was alive was just a
(22:44):
blessing.
And I was so grateful for that.
But then I knew I had a longroad of recovery because, like I
said, I had no muscle mass atall.
I had to use a walker Again.
I couldn't walk properly.
I had to learn how to eat againand I was on the puree diet
again, and it was I've beenthere, done that.
And I was on the pureed dietagain, and it was I've been
(23:07):
there, done that.
I knew, yeah, yeah, I recoveredfrom that and here we are now.
So I'm 31, I'm fine now,everything's stable.
And so I decided to write abook because I needed to, and I
think initially I wrote it formyself.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Um, yeah, it's very cathartic, like I think it
leaves legacy.
No matter what, that storydoesn't end with you.
That story is on forever.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Exactly, yeah.
And and I think it just showsyour resiliency, your strength,
your heart, because that'sdefinitely not for the faint of
heart I'm over here gripping mychair and I can't like.
I've been through not all.
I've been through a few thingsthat I can relate to with you,
(23:53):
and I remember how difficultthat was, and to have one thing
after the other, after the other, after the other, yeah, for.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
Essentially over the essentially 10 years.
So over the last 10 years,every year or something, so it
all didn't happen at once.
It was literally I wouldrecover from something and then
something else would happen.
I'd recover from something andthen something else, so
consecutively for 10 years.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Yeah, that's not an easy feat and it shows and we
can talk about things thatyou're passionate about as well
but it does show your resiliencyand the fact that, literally,
you are the odd in AustraliaAbsolutely so many with so many
(24:39):
different little things that thefact that they were flying
medication from halfway acrossthe world for you to get like
that is all very that's justincredible that you are here,
that I'm so honored to betalking to you right now, and it
(25:00):
just it blows my mind thatsomeone could be, and everything
is obviously relative to thatperson, but so I don't ever want
to like guilt or shame anyonefor experiencing a difficult
thing.
However, if we take thatexample of like, taking in all
(25:20):
this information and okay, whatdo we got to do?
Yeah, and making sure that,whatever it was it, we're not
prolonging the moment of like,we'll feel the situation and,
okay, what do we got to doExactly?
Taking action in that because,again, like you said, you don't
have time to waste.
You want to continue to liveyour life and the amounts of
(25:44):
surgeries that you've had werenot small surgeries, they were
very huge surgeries.
I have just a question whenthey did the surgery for the
pituitary gland, did that changeanything?
Were you able to signal nowyour body, to signal hormones?
Speaker 3 (26:03):
no, I can't signal, but I've done many rounds of IVF
and at that point I didn't evenknow if I could, even if I had
eggs, to be honest, because Igot too much treatment.
So I did get some eggs and I wemanaged to create some embryos.
So obviously not pregnant yet,but the fact that I could even
(26:27):
one create eggs was just amiracle.
And then the fact that theywere good enough to turn into
embryos is just a whole.
So some haven't taken and somewere miscarriages and things
like that, but that's just awhole other journey that I'm
still on.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Yeah, if you don't mind me asking, are you trying
to carry the baby or are youlooking?
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Okay, so initially, yes, and people think I'm crazy.
And no, my husband and I havethis discussion with many
doctors and with each other andI'm a what if?
Sort of person is in the termsof, if I don't try, I'm gonna
think for the rest of my life,what if I did try?
(27:10):
And so we're basically gonnatry until either my body says to
me no, enough's enough, orfinancially or whatever the
situation is mentally like.
That's a whole nother level ofstrength there.
Surrogacy is very hard inAustralia.
There's a whole bunch of ruleswhere you're not allowed to
(27:31):
advertise for a surrogate.
Someone has to essentiallyvolunteer, and there's a whole
bunch of legalities with it aswell.
Overseas is an option as well,so we might have to explore that
one day, and then our lastresort would definitely be
adoption as well.
But again, in Australia that'sa whole nother thing.
(27:52):
So we're just starting off withthe basics and then working our
way through that yeah, if I hadmy parts, because I had a full
hysterectomy I would totallyvolunteer.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
That is, that was yeah.
I always wanted to do surrogacyand the reason was because when
I was 19, I was told that Icouldn't have kids and so I
didn't end up doing IVF, but Idid do 18 months of fertility
treatments and it's hard.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
It's time You've got to have medication, you've got
to have scans.
Like it is hard.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
It is hard and heartbreaking all together.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
And when.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
It's crazy, because when I finally said to my
husband at the time my, now myex-husband but when I finally
was like I'm done, I can't dothis anymore, we were on our way
.
We were gonna go on vacationthat month, um to visit family,
and we're from Puerto Rico, andI said I have this last round of
(28:58):
pills and I'm done, I can'tanymore.
This has been a year and a half.
I'm only like 20 years old, 21.
And I'm like I just can'tcontinue this.
This is just so hard.
And so we went on vacation andthat was the first ovulation I
(29:18):
had in.
I don't know how long I had in,I don't know how long and I was
like hold.
Everything we were staying atmy mother-in-law's house was my
sister-in-law's graduation.
This is the crazy part.
I remember the day I gotpregnant.
It was.
May 25th and I was like we'renot going to a party, we're
(29:39):
going to have our own party.
This hasn't happened in so longand so it just.
It was one of those momentsthat I was like I can't even
believe it.
And so, given the fact that Ihad gone through so much like
ups and downs and heartbreaksand all the things if I had, I
(29:59):
always wanted to.
I talked about wanting adopt or, yeah, being a surrogate,
because I was then blessed withnot just my daughter, my oldest
daughter, but I had two moreafterwards that's amazing and I
was like, oh, I wish I could.
Speaker 3 (30:16):
Yeah, I had a full hysterectomy, so I can't carry
it anymore but man, that's anexample of like and that's what
I feel, like when you, whenyou're at the end of that,
you've had enough and you'relike that's it, I'm gonna throw
everything at this last onebecause that's it, I'm done.
After that, yeah, I mean itjust works.
And I love those storiesbecause, yeah, it's crazy that
(30:39):
anything can happen at any time,absolutely.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Absolutely.
Yes, the desire was alwaysthere, but it was just like
allowing yourself to just trustthat whatever, whatever, I'm not
even, I'm not even going topush it anymore.
You're just going to allowthings to happen.
And I was on vacation so I wasrelaxed and, yeah, it is that
moment of like I understand yourwhat if.
(31:03):
So that's why I'm asking.
I asked because I understandthat what if?
And wanted to know, like I know, that you've had some surgery,
so I didn't know if that createdextra complications obviously
(31:25):
I'll be a high risk pregnancy,which is inevitable, obviously.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
But I've got a really good team of doctors now and
I've got everything lined up andI've got full trust in them now
.
So that doesn't worry me, it'sjust the whole getting it,
getting there in the first place.
That's the part, and I did.
I put so much pressure onmyself because, like when you
touched on about being relaxed,I think it makes such a
difference because initially Iwas putting so much pressure on
(31:48):
myself and things weren'tworking and I wasn't even
getting eggs at one stagebecause I think I had that much
pressure on myself.
And then I was overthinkingeverything and I think, yeah,
now I'm gonna go back into it.
Like I took a break, I had to.
I was like I can't keep doingthis.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Yeah, mentally emotionally it is so draining
and physically like.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
I think physically is probably the last it is, it
honestly is, and so, like I'vebeen so grateful to throughout
everything I've been through, Ihaven't suffered any mental
diagnoses and I think I was onthe verge with IVF because
that's how it affected mementally and you don't realize
like I was.
Like go and cut my head open 10times over.
(32:29):
I'll go and do that put me toan IVF situation and it's a
whole different ball game there.
Yeah, exactly, so I'll getthere eventually you will.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
I truly believe in and I think that your story is
now international and I thinkthat you'll have more people
rooting for you, and Icompletely believe in the power
of prayer or intention andwhatever.
That is right.
So when you put good intentionout to the world and you look at
the at life, the way thatyou're looking at it and the way
(33:02):
that you take it on, I thinkthat creates this extra
community of people that backyou up, no matter what, and I
feel like a part of my like.
I had cancer four times.
The third and fourth time itwas at the age of 32 and I was a
(33:24):
single mom of three kids and,like all of these things were, I
would have been so scary.
I leaned into a community, yeah, and I was very vocal about
everything that I was goingthrough and I was like, okay, I
need all of the good intentions,all the good vibes, whatever
you believe in your God,whatever, however, you decide
(33:48):
that you need to like connect toa higher.
Whatever you do, just send goodvibes my way and I really truly
feel that, like, the more wehave that, the more we put our
story out there, the more goodintentions and good vibes and
good prayers and good all ofthat goes your way, and then you
(34:12):
just have to trust and thateverything will work out.
The maybe it's that there's akid out there that really needs
us, that is already like alreadyalive, that is already here,
and maybe that's the journey.
(34:34):
Maybe I have to just trustthat's the journey.
And and it was like this senseof and that was like that month,
at the beginning of that monthof May of that year.
I looked at my husband at thetime and I was just like maybe
it's just that.
Maybe it's just that like I'mpushing for this so much, but
(35:06):
maybe it's because the kid thatneeds us.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
That needs me to be their mom, you to be.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
Their dad is already here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, and thatneeds our love.
That's all.
Maybe that's the case and it'sjust that moment of surrender
that you're like.
Whatever it needs to be.
Yeah.
And then life does its littlething and and then you get your
miracle in the end, exactlyWhatever that may be, I think,
(35:31):
even with all of your surgeriesand everything, it's just
knowing that I took the actionsteps to get better.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
So, however that may look, yeah, if it's not IVF, if
it's whatever, whatever it is,I'm on the right path because
I'm doing it all with goodintention.
Speaker 3 (35:50):
And a lot of people ask me oh, how can you believe
in a higher power or whateveryou want to believe in, when
you've been through all this?
Like all this stuff's horrible?
And I'm like, yeah, but youknow what?
All this, like all this stuff'shorrible.
And I'm like, yeah, but youknow what?
Someone or something is lookingout there for me, because I
wouldn't have got through any ofthis without that.
Yeah, absolutely, and, like yousaid, it's grown me as a person
(36:14):
.
It's made me who I am today.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
I wouldn't be this person if I hadn't gone through
any of that, so I've got to begrateful for that yeah,
absolutely, and I think thatwhen we like, when you're in a
place where you have come soclose to not being here anymore,
there's just a different way tolook at life, with the lens of
full-on gratitude, that thereisn't time for wasting it on the
(36:42):
that energy, that those thatthought process do.
Speaker 3 (36:45):
We have our moments absolutely and our moments are
so necessary for us to be ableto process.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
All the things are so needed, yeah, um.
But to stay stuck in thosemoments, it's not worth it.
Speaker 3 (37:03):
Oh, trust me, I have had my moment.
There has been times where I'vebeen stuck in my bed and then I
get like tell myself off.
I'm like no, stop it.
Like you've had your moment,now Get out there and do your
thing, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
I think I used to say all the time everything happens
for a reason, and then Ishifted that I was listening I
don't remember what, I think itwas Rachel Hollis, but she
mentioned something that reallymade me shift, that saying yeah,
don't think that everythinghappens for a reason, because
(37:38):
there's not a reason that achild has to go through the
things that you went through.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
True, yeah, I like that.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
However, I do think that there's a purpose for
everything that we go throughand there's a meaning behind all
of it, and so if that, if wecan take a moment and find that
purpose and that meaning, theneverything happened the way it
needed to, exactly.
Yeah, because now we have abigger purpose.
Now, with your story, you canhelp so many other people that
(38:07):
would be my absolute dream.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
That is my dream.
If I can help anyone out there,then by all means I'd be more
than happy to just be theirbuddy and just be there and say,
hey, I'm rooting for you, I'vegot, you've got this.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
I know you can do it yeah, so what's your thought
process when you receive adiagnosis?
It's not an easy thing, but Iwant to know what your process
is my thought process.
Speaker 3 (38:33):
Well, it's different.
I feel like most people wouldjust cry emotions are very big
thing and most people would justthink, oh my God, my life is
shattered, and they'll startcrying.
They don't know what to do.
I suppose mine's more of like aI don't know a logical thinking
where I just go okay, so you'vetold me I've got this now and
(38:58):
then it's all right.
So now I need to work out howlong I'm going to be in
treatment.
For what is the treatment?
Am I going to have to have asurgery?
Is it just going to be a drip?
Is it going to be this?
Do I need to stop working?
And so I just analyze my.
It's more analytical, that'sthe word.
So I just basically analyze thewhole situation and just
(39:21):
prepare myself with okay, I'vegot a speed bump ahead of me.
This is what I need to do toget over it.
Let's make a plan.
I'm all for plans.
Let's put a plan in place andlet's do it.
And obviously, those plans arenot always going to stick.
They're not always going to beperfect plans and along the way,
you're gonna have to divert afew times and yeah, yeah, like
(39:43):
you have to have a plan and alsoallow yourself to flow through
it.
That's right, yeah so it's likeokay, well, I've done this and
all this was good and thatworked, but now I've got this
little issue, so let's fix that,let's get back on the straight
and narrow sort of thing.
Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
I love that.
So, yeah, I do have my momentsand it's okay to have your
moments.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
I believe strongly that people do need to mourn and
grieve and realize what'shappening, but I think it's the
ability to get out of that asquickly as possible, to then
just move on.
And I always look at somethingbig in the future, like back a
few years I had my wedding tolook forward to, or I had a
holiday to look forward to orwhatever was going on in my life
(40:29):
at that point in time.
So I always missed on that andgone.
Well, I need to get over therein 12 months time, so how do I
get there?
Speaker 2 (40:38):
Yeah, exactly.
I love that because it is partof it.
It's part of no-transcript.
(41:04):
Okay, my goal is to get to thatvacation or to that wedding.
What do I need to do for me sothat I could check that?
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So how do you continue to smileand laugh after everything that
you've been through?
Speaker 3 (41:22):
that's yeah, I get this all the time and I think
it's just.
I always look at lifelightheartedly as well, in a way
that I don't think it's allserious all the time.
I think, yes, you need to beserious in certain situations
and things, but go and have fun.
Go and enjoy your life, likelife's way too short.
(41:43):
Don't be so hard on yourself.
If you want to go and eat thatburger, go and have fun.
Go and enjoy your life likelife's way too short.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
If you want to go and eat thatburger, go and eat that burger.
Go and have a laugh like.
I suppose that and I've grownto be resilient.
What am I supposed to do?
Am I supposed to sit there andsob every day and feel sorry for
myself like that's not a goodquality of life?
But I want to be happy andsmiley.
I want other people to be happyand smiley.
(42:05):
So I think it's just thatresilience.
And also I do think about whatI've been through in the past,
but I don't let it affect me,like it's been there, it's done,
it's in the past.
So this is now and right now.
I just want to be happy.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
It's so yeah yeah, I feel like we've already survived
our worst day and the fact that, like those are already behind
us, the only thing that we haveis to look forward to the
present, because tomorrow is not, definitely not promised, and
yesterday already happened, sowhy dwell on that?
Speaker 3 (42:40):
exactly and remember what grew you and turn you into
the person, but don't let itdefine you.
I never let any of this defineme, ever to everyone.
I'm just simply Amelia, that'sit.
Like, yeah, and all my medicalissues even now, they just live
next to me, they live by my sideand that's it god.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
I love that so much.
It speaks to my soul.
You're resilient and motivated.
What made you like this?
I think I had no choice.
Speaker 3 (43:10):
I had no choice.
That's what it was, and I'mgrateful for that, because I
gained these new skills.
I learned how to be resilient,I learned to be motivated.
Yeah, when you're in thesesituations, you've got two
options you can give up or youcan fight it, and I've chosen to
fight every single time.
And yeah, I think, when you'represented these bad situations
(43:33):
or whatever you want to callthem, yeah, you've got no choice
.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
I feel like we do have a choice.
You just choose the betteroption, because we do have a
choice.
I know some people that chooseto continue to live in that
victimhood and that, like, ifyou want to live a good life,
victim is definitely not theplace you want to be.
(43:58):
So what I should?
Speaker 3 (44:00):
say for me, I don't have a choice.
Yeah, my choice is always gonnabe to fight.
I'm not done.
I've got so many things I wantto do and I'm not ready to leave
.
Speaker 2 (44:11):
Yeah yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
I love that.
What have you struggled withthe most?
And I know that the eyelid.
I know that was tough.
You said what let helped youwalk through that and rebuild
that confidence talking topeople about it initially.
Speaker 3 (44:30):
Yeah, I was always worried.
Well, the first thing was, yeah, the staring.
But I couldn't help that that Ican't do anything about that.
I was also worried about beingwith someone like a friend or a
family member in public, and Iwas worried how they would feel
being with someone like a friendor a family member in public.
And I was worried how theywould feel being around someone
that looked different.
(44:50):
But then when I started goingout back out into public and
telling people these things,they were just looking at me,
going are you stupid?
Like stop thinking that way.
Like no, like we want to bewith you.
I'm like yeah, but don't youfeel awkward being in front of
someone that looks different?
They're like no.
So I think it's that acceptance.
Once I was accepted for the wayI looked, that's what helped
(45:16):
move my confidence.
Like I would never dare get infront of the camera to take a
photo ever.
And then I slowly started to dothat and yes, okay, I've got a
certain hairstyle that doescover most of the eye which I'm
working through eventually I'llexpose it, but I started off
doing that.
And then I would start to go tolocal places and go out for
(45:39):
lunch and whatever else I wantedto do, and then I'd start to go
into more people with crowdsand then I wrote the book.
And then that's when I was like, well, well, I need to get out
there now.
So I went into the photo shootand that's what cemented my
confidence, I think, and thatgave me the real confidence
booster, because one, I wasaccepted by the photographer.
(45:59):
And then I had all thesebeautiful photos and I'm like,
well, I need to share them.
So I started sharing them.
And then I started doing, yes,like some zoom calls and things,
and jumping on webinars and noone was saying anything and I
thought, okay, well, that's good, that's really good.
And then I've done a couple ofspeaking gigs in front of like.
(46:22):
My last one was in front of 200people, and so I got up on
stage and I spoke to 200 peopleand it was one of my first big
ones and everyone was coming upto me afterwards and they were
just, they weren't even talkingabout my eye, they were just
saying you're inspirational,you're amazing, whatever they've
said.
And I was like, okay, well,they're not even noticing,
they're not saying anything.
(46:43):
And so, yeah, I think it's justthat start off with baby steps,
go into that little directionof baby steps and then grow from
there, but then also surroundyourself with people that will
accept you, and there is a lotout there that will yeah,
absolutely.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
So I feel like you had a lot of roadblocks that you
had to overcome, but what doyou feel like was the biggest
roadblock?
Do you feel like it was theconfidence, or was there
something else, that that thatyou would want someone to take
away from your story?
Speaker 3 (47:19):
yeah, limiting confidence, but also the trying
to remain positive.
And it's hard.
Trust me, like I'm not going tosay it's easy, but you just
need to hone in and find, likewe said before, something to
look forward, to Do what youwant to do what makes you happy.
(47:40):
Really, take care of yourself.
Like I had to learn to listento my body.
I've got 10,000 things going onat once and I was burning out
all the time and so now I've hadto learn.
Well, my body's tired, it needsrest, so go and take that half
an hour rest or hour rest andrecuperate.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
So there's just so many aspects that it's so hard
to pinpoint down to one reallyyeah, and then is there any like
daily habits or rituals thatyou say that would help, that
help you get to that level of?
Speaker 3 (48:11):
absolutely, yeah, positivity.
And from physical point of view, like drinking a lot of water.
I try and eat well most of thetime but let's be honest, I
don't believe anyone that saysthey eat 100% well all the time.
So as long as I'm trying andtrying to put good food into me,
then that's fine, but I willhave the sticky whatever like
(48:34):
the chocolate and whatever elseI feel like for the day.
I've had to learn to loveexercise.
I hate exercising.
You would never find me at thegym by myself.
So I've had to get a personaltrainer to keep me accountable
and I've got to get a personaltrainer to keep me accountable
and I've got to do that for mybones.
I've got no choice.
Like, exercise has to be partof my life now.
But it's funny, because I hategoing there.
(48:55):
I hate getting there.
But then once I've done myworkout, I feel so good and I'm
like, oh, I'm so glad I went now.
Speaker 2 (49:02):
I always say I do it for the after feeling.
That's it.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
It's so true Because there's times I wake up and I'm
like, oh, do I really have to go?
Like, no, get yourself out ofbed and go.
And then I'm so glad afterwardsthat I've gone.
And yeah, it's every day isdifferent.
Someday, like you, have baddays, there's days where I can't
get out of bed, and that's justwhat it is, and you just do
what you can that day.
But when I have a really goodday, I utilize that day as well
(49:28):
and I'm like great, I'm having agreat day, so I'm full of
energy, I'm gonna get whatever Iwant done today.
So, yeah, just basicallylistening to yourself and
looking after yourself that's sogood.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Yeah, I think self-care that literally changed
the trajectory of my life.
So I that's.
That is what I dedicate my lifeto.
Doing now is just, my oxygenmask goes on first.
I take care of me first,because if I don't, then how am
I going to be here for my kids,for anybody else in my life?
(50:00):
So, yeah it's.
I wholeheartedly believe in allthe things that you are saying.
Any other things that you wantto just give us before we end
today?
Speaker 3 (50:12):
I suppose my well, I haven't even told anyone my
title of my book, have I?
Speaker 2 (50:18):
No, I said it because I think that at the beginning?
Yeah, because I said thatsounds familiar to me.
Speaker 3 (50:25):
That's right.
You did too, my apologies.
No, the only thing I'd like toend with was I made up a quote,
and it is.
Being positive doesn't meanthat everything's good.
It's the ability to see thegood in everything, and I
strongly believe no matter what,no matter how shitty the
situation is, there is alwayssomething good.
(50:46):
Whether it's small or big,there is always something good
in every single situation.
Like I said before, a cancerdiagnosis is not good.
You understand, you've beenthrough it but the fact that it
was my opportunity to go blondelike that was fun.
Speaker 2 (51:02):
Yeah, I'll take that, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
To me that's the good thing about it.
And like everything thinned out, I lost all my hair.
I didn't have to shave for sixmonths like I was hairless.
So like win for us.
So just seeing those littlelight-hearted things, and yeah,
there's always definitely a goodinner situation.
Speaker 2 (51:21):
I love that.
I love that quote.
It gave me goosebumps because Iwholeheartedly believe the same
thing it's.
It's finding the purpose andthe meaning behind things.
Speaker 3 (51:30):
And I just oh, that's so oh my gosh, I was just
writing my book and I come upwith that quote and I'm like oh,
did I just make up a quote?
I think I did.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
Yes, I love that.
I am so incredibly honored tohave met you.
I feel like this we have to stayconnected, obviously because I
want to know all of the thingsand honestly, I'm just I hope
that my, our listeners got somuch out of today and just I
(52:02):
really truly, from like thebottom of my heart, I am sending
all of the positive and goodenergy and prayers and all
intentions, all the things,because I think that you are the
light.
You became the lighthouse forso many people with your story
and I feel like I can honestlysay, just meeting you now I know
(52:25):
why people don't even look atthe fact that your eye won't
open.
Yeah, your energy is soabsolutely beautiful that it
radiates light from it.
So I think that, if anything,it's just another part of your
character and that's like you'rejust, you're just winking at us
(52:48):
because you have so much energythat's exactly right but I, I,
just I am so honored.
Thank you so much for jumpingon listeners again.
I hope you got so much out oftoday.
Um, like I did, I wascompletely in awe listening to
Amelia's story.
I am just so excited for thisto be heard and for your story
(53:15):
to be out there and go buy herbook like immediately.
I hope everyone has an amazingrest of their day.
Peace out.
Thank you for listening.
Love your life.
Bye-bye.
Welcome back to the Against All Odds the Less Than
1% Chance podcast with your host, maria Aponte, where we will
hear stories of incrediblepeople thriving against all odds
, and my hope is that we can allsee how life is always
happening for us, even when weare the Less Than 1% Chance.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Hey, hey, welcome back to Against All Odds, the
Less Than 1% Chance podcast withyour host, maria Aponte.
I hope you're doing fantastictoday.
I wanted to just I wanna take amoment because I have my second
international guest on and I amso excited.
I just chatted with her alittle bit prior to, and you
(00:42):
guys are in for such a treattoday.
So Amelia O'Sullivan is aninspirational young lady who has
faced life's challenges head onand always does so with
positivity and humor, which isalso needed.
She is full of life,enthusiastic and very passionate
about providing support topeople like her that have been
through horrendous medicalissues and diagnosis.
(01:04):
In Amelia's short 30 years, shehas endured more than one
person would experience in theirentire lifetime, including.
There's a ton of things on here, so I'm going to say a few, but
there's a kidney transplant,spinal fusion, neck dissections,
cardiac arrest oh my goodness.
Non-hodgkin's lymphoma,pneumonia, sepsis and oh my gosh
(01:29):
.
Let's just say I'm going togive her the space to speak a
little bit more about all thethings that she has been through
, but she has defied all oddsover and over again.
She is here to tell her storyand really, when she got to the
point where she can maybe writea book.
She did, and so she's got abook that she wrote and is
(01:51):
promoting now.
So I am so excited becauseafter this I am going to get it
immediately.
But the book is called I shouldbe effing dead, which is so
funny because I, literally a fewdays ago, from this recording I
posted, I was, I almost diedfive times, and it's so crazy
(02:13):
that this is the.
You see, when we put our energyat that vibration of you know
what, I'm just going to go thereand you attract the people that
you're supposed to have in yourlife, for whatever reason it
may be.
So welcome Em.
I'm so excited to have you Giveus a little bit of background of
(02:35):
your story, and I know thatyou've been through a lot of
things, so I want to hear just alittle bit of your background.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
Of course.
Thank you so much for having me, and I'm so honored to be your
first Australian guest.
Oh, where do I even start?
I suppose the start's a goodplace.
I was born with kidney diseaseand had my right kidney removed
and lived most of my life on onekidney.
I was fine.
I lived a main, proper childlife.
(03:03):
It wasn't until I was about 15or 16, and that's when my kidney
was at 20% function.
The problem that we were facingwas that I was having reflux
from my bladder going up to mykidney and damaging it.
I was also very prone toinfections, so that was also
(03:23):
damaging it damaging it.
I was also very prone toinfections, so that was also
damaging it.
So I had my specialists and Iwas told that I would have to
have a kidney transplant.
The problem we were facing was,though, if I was to have a
kidney transplant, it was justthe same thing was going to
happen Everything was going toget damaged again because of the
bladder.
So when I was 17, I had my firstmajor major well, actually my
(03:45):
second major surgery.
So my first one was when I hadmy kidney removed and they had
to reconstruct my whole bladder.
So they cut open my bladder,they grabbed a bit of my
intestine, made it bigger androunder and it actually fixed
the issue.
So I was happy it was allrecovering.
And then we still had thiskidney issue because again it
(04:06):
was only at 20%.
So four years later it declinedand I had to have the
transplant.
I got a transplant from my dad,so it was very lucky and
fortunate because in Australiait's I'm not too sure what it's
like in America, but in thewaiting list is very long, it's
five to seven years and also inAustralia you have to opt to be
(04:32):
a donor.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (04:35):
Whereas in a lot of other countries you're
automatically a donor and thenyou have to opt out.
So we are trying to get that inAustralia, so hopefully it
happens.
But anyway, I had the kidneytransplant and again it all
worked perfectly fine.
I was all recovering and I hada good working kidney.
And it was about eight or ninemonths later and I started to go
(04:56):
back to the gym.
So I had to get fit and healthyagain.
I was on a steroid and thatmade me put on a lot of weight,
about 12 kilos.
I wasn't used to it.
So I thought, right, I'm goingto really get into my health now
.
So I changed my diet, I startedgoing to the gym and then I got
this knee pain and I went toall these different doctors and
(05:19):
I went to emergency a few times,got sent home with painkillers,
scan after scan, and everyone'stelling me there's nothing
wrong, you've just gone to thegym, you've injured yourself,
don't worry about it, you'll befine.
Anyway, it got to the pointwhere I was sitting upright and
I couldn't even lay down.
I was in excruciating pain andI thought, no, this is not
(05:40):
normal, like I need something, Ineed to do something.
So I actually went to myprevious kidney specialist at
the time and I explained to himthat I couldn't lay down and he
said well, that's strange.
Why would it get worse if I waslaying down?
It's in the knee.
So he goes look, I'm going toorder a full body CT scan.
And I thought, okay, let's doit.
(06:01):
So I did that.
And I thought, okay, let's doit.
So I did that and I got a callthe next day and he said you
need to go straight to hospital.
I've got a bed booked in foryou, go there, I'll meet you
there later.
I thought, okay, well, theyfound something.
Obviously I had no idea what itwas, so, packed, everything,
went to the hospital and theystarted testing further.
So they did a PET scan.
(06:22):
I had a little lump in my groinarea, so they did a biopsy.
They did a bone marrow biopsy.
So by the time they did allthese tests, a week had gone
past.
I was in a hospital for a week.
Then my kidney doctor walked inwith a hematologist so a blood
cancer or blood doctor and theylooked at me and they pretty
much said you've been diagnosedwith stage three non-Hodgkin's
(06:45):
lymphoma.
And I've just looked at themand I've gone okay.
So what's the treatment andwhen do we start?
And they're like they justlooked at me and was like, well,
is that all you got to say?
I'm like, yeah, I want to knowthe treatment now.
I want to know how long it'sgoing to take, because I want to
hurry up and do this treatment,because I want to move on with
(07:05):
my life.
I've got things to do.
Everyone around me is crying.
My parents and my boyfriend atthe time were just distraught,
and I was the rock when I wasgoing through everything.
And so this was on a Wednesday.
I remember the day, and byFriday, three days later, I was
on the chemotherapy wardstarting my first treatment and
chemotherapy.
So that lasted six months andthen I was in remission.
(07:30):
So I was happy.
I beat it.
I didn't really strugglethroughout the chemo.
The only thing I believe it ornot was when I lost my hair.
That's what I really struggledwith, because I suppose being a
female, it's your form ofidentity, right?
And when it's coming out inclumps uncontrollably, you start
to freak out.
So I ended up getting a blondewig.
(07:51):
It was my opportunity to goblonde.
Yes, was it more fun it was morefun at the time, and I got my
auntie at the time she was ahairdresser back in the day and
I said we're shaving it.
And she goes, why, why just letit fall out?
And I said, no, I want to be incontrol, it's not going to be
on my terms.
Um, so that's it.
(08:12):
We shaved it and I put the wigon and then I was okay, I was
fine.
So this brings us, yeah,towards the end of 2015 now, and
I was in remission for thelymphoma, but they had found
tumors in my liver and they'relike, well, that's strange.
So they biopsied them andthey're called EBV driven smooth
(08:34):
muscle tumors, so theEpstein-Barr virus, which is
also known as the glandularfever virus, that was driving
these tumors and they had noidea what they were.
They had no idea how to treatthem.
I think still to this day, I'mthe only one in Australia that
is diagnosed with them.
Yeah, so it was trial and errorand it was well, what do we do?
(08:57):
And at this point in time, theywere only in the liver, and so
we did an internal radiationtherapy, where they directly
inject radiation internally, andthey I suppose the students had
a mixed response.
Some of them went quiet, wentaway, some of them just went
inactive and some of them werestill there.
(09:18):
So we thought, okay, well, whatelse can we do?
And then there was a medicationat the time where it had well,
there was research and it saidthat it had properties to try
and get rid of tumors orsuppress the tumors.
So we thought, okay, we'll trythat.
We tried that, but it actuallyhad the opposite effect in me.
It actually grew them more andthey started developing in all
(09:42):
other areas, so other areaswhere in my head, in my neck, in
my spine, in my lung, in mybladder, they were everywhere.
But this particular tumordoesn't spread by the
bloodstream, so they're all newoccurrences.
So I said to the doctors, I saidno, I don't want this
medication anymore, take me offit.
So we we removed that and thenwe thought, well, what do we do
(10:05):
now?
And then more research was doneand it was actually one of my
specialists.
We've got a cancer hospitalhere in Victoria, in Melbourne,
and it's called the PeterMcCallum Cancer Centre.
So they had some contacts inAmerica and there was a trial of
T cell therapy, but thistherapy was targeted for the EBV
(10:28):
virus.
So I was actually having stuffflown from America to Australia
and I was having this treatmentand again I got a mixed response
.
Everything's died down a littlebit and I was okay and they
were all stable and I was happywith that.
I said look, they can livethere as long as they don't
cause me any harm.
Exactly, as long as they're notmessing with that, I said look,
they can live there as long asthey don't cause me any harm,
exactly.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
As long as they're not messing with me.
I got this.
I got it they can stay there.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
So we did some of that therapy and then I went on
a holiday to Sri Lanka and whenwe got back I felt very ill and
went into hospital and I endedup getting pneumonia.
And pneumonia is horrible.
It is so painful and I wouldn'twish it on anyone, to be honest
.
Anyway, as I was doing testing,they found a tumor in my lungs
(11:13):
so that had to get removed.
Got that removed, had fiverounds of radiation all good, so
I was fine with that.
And then I started getting lotsof bladder infections, and
that's when we discovered theone in the bladder, so we had to
get that one removed.
Then a few years had passed, soI was in and out of hospital
(11:34):
having various treatments, andthen I got to the end of 2019
and I was stable enough.
Everything was coming backclear, my scans were stable, and
my husband and I thought well,let's go for let's family plan,
let's think about starting afamily of our own.
Now I had a rod in my arm.
It's called the implanon rod.
(11:55):
It's a contraception rod andthat was due to come out.
So I got it taken out and Ididn't get my menstrual cycle
back.
It was three months later, so Iwent to the doctors and said
well, it's not back.
Oh, let's just give it anotherthree months.
I said, okay, well, fair enough.
So we waited another three, sosix months in total, and still
(12:15):
not back.
So more testing did a bloodtest of all my hormones, and
they were just zero.
There was nothing there.
And then that led to an MRI onmy head area and then I got
called in again immediately andso you've got your brain, and
then you've got your pituitarygland, which is just under your
(12:38):
brain and that regulates allyour hormones.
Speaker 2 (12:40):
As you probably already know, that's what the
signals that yeah, and thesignal yeah, so that stalk, so
it.
Speaker 3 (12:47):
Basically I had a tumor that was sitting in that
area below the brain and it waspushing on the stalk so it was
damaging the stalk.
So I was never, ever going toget my period and still don't
now.
So the week later I had to havea craniotomy.
So they cut my head open all onthis.
My right side removed theremoved the tumor well, 90
something percent of the tumorand then a week later they went
(13:09):
through my nose and did atransphenoidal surgery to remove
the rest of my tumor.
Then I had to have a skin graftto fix all the inside of that
area.
But as a result my nerve gotcut.
So my right eyelid doesn't goup or down oh my gosh.
So it's permanently shut nowand my confidence was just way
(13:32):
like below low.
I wasn't even confident tobegin with, and let alone this
has happened.
So I was so grateful thatthey'd removed 100% of the tumor
and that was gone.
But I had to face thisconfidence issue now and I
initially like wore like amakeup remover pad, eye patch
sort of thing and just pretendedI had an eye surgery, just so
(13:53):
people wouldn't ask I would tryand cover it up, I wouldn't be
going out as much.
I'm a very social person.
I love going out, but I didn'teven want to go down to the
supermarket.
That that's how bad I was.
And then I said to myself no,amelia, you need to get out Like
, this is your life now.
You need to accept it.
So I changed my mind, mypositive thinking, and accepted
(14:16):
it and said well, no, you knowwhat I haven't changed as a
person?
Yeah, I might physically lookdifferent, but I'm still me.
That was a lot to get through,but I got through it all.
And then I learned that peoplewere just staring because they
were curious, I think yeah, Idon't think they were doing it
in a bad way.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
I think that people because they're not used to, and
I feel like when we're in gradeschool it's the teasing, but as
we're older, I don't think it'seven the teasing, it's the
curiosity and like, what's herstory?
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (14:53):
So in the end now I just walk in with confidence,
pretend it's not even there andmost people don't even look
anymore, so just having to havethat inner confidence.
So I was recovering from thatand I was all good.
And then a couple of monthslater I had to have the routine
scan to make sure everything wasgood.
And I said to the doctorsbecause I had tumors all on the
(15:14):
sides of my neck and I said, oh,it's bulging and it's really
uncomfortable I go, can we justdo a scan just to see for future
if I can get them removed andthey're like yeah, why not?
So did that and then again gotcalled in a week later and I
thought, oh god, they've foundsomething now.
And turns out that my c5vertebrae had a little tumor in
(15:36):
it and fractured it.
I had no symptoms, nothing.
They're like are you in pain?
Anyway, I said no, I wasactually running a fish and chip
takeaway shop with my parentsat the time, so it was quite
physical oh my gosh, I wasrunning around and doing that.
So, yeah, I didn't, I'd knownothing, nothing was indicating
that I had a fractured vertebrae.
(15:56):
So, again, I was scheduled forsurgery and so they did a neck
dissection where they removedthe tumors on both sides and
then they put a cage in thefront to try and stabilize the
spine.
Yeah, but because of myprevious use of steroids, my
bones are not very good.
They're quite weak.
So two days later they had todo a fusion.
(16:18):
So they did a fusion from c2 tot1.
So I believe that's like eightlevels or something like that
seven or eight levels my god soI was back to square one and I
had to go through physical rehaband I couldn't eat or talk for
a good month because they movedmy vocal cord.
Um, I was on a puree diet, soessentially a baby diet.
(16:39):
Yeah, just everything.
And I suppose what I learnedfrom that was that you take the
little things for granted, likethe ability to take a step or
the ability to swallow somewater or something.
It's just an everyday thingthat you just do subconsciously,
and when you suddenly can't dothat, you realize.
Speaker 2 (16:59):
It makes you appreciate life so much.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
Absolutely, it does.
So again, I was in rehab andpersonal training and got myself
good, so it was all good andthen.
So then we come to thefollowing year and I'm 30, so
I'm 31 now and I'm just about toturn 30 years old.
So I had my party and I lovedit so much.
And then we hit November, andit was one Sunday morning I
(17:23):
remember it clearly, it wasNovember the 20th in 2022.
And I'd woken up and I wasn'tfeeling the best, and so I said
to my husband look, I'm going tohave a shower, I'm just going
to go back to bed and rest.
And he goes, that's fine.
And he went out to do yard work.
He never does yard work, ever.
I'm going to embrace this.
(17:43):
You go out there, I'll rest,we'll be fine anyway.
A few hours later, he'd come tocheck on me and I was in a pool
of sweat, but I was shivering atthe same time.
I didn't really know what wasgoing on.
I was super thirsty and but Ididn't want to drink.
I didn't feel like drinking,let alone eating, and I was, I
(18:04):
know, like I felt this before.
I knew it was happening becauseI had sepsis multiple times and
I knew right, I think I've gotsepsis again.
So I said to my husband look,pack my hospital bag, I'll go
use the bathroom and then you'llhave to take me to hospital.
He goes okay.
And I went to try and get up andI was just so dizzy I couldn't
even walk.
(18:25):
So I go.
Well, scrap that, I can't dothat.
Tried to walk to the car,couldn't do that either.
So I said to my husband well, Ithink you're gonna have to call
the ambulance now.
Within the space of half and Iwas conscious to pretty much
almost passing out and my heartrate hit like 150 or 160.
My blood pressure dropped my.
(18:46):
I check my blood pressureregularly because of my kidney
and the machine wasn't evendetecting my heart rate.
I'm sorry, my blood pressure ohmy gosh.
So when the ambulance came, theychecked and it was in like the
80s or something, so it was verylow.
So I was rushed straight toemergency lights and sirens and
all I remember is being wheeledinto the emergency department,
(19:09):
into the resuscitation room, andthen I remember all these
doctors poking and prodding me,trying to get a line into me as
in a drip, and then that's it.
I don't remember anything else.
So turns out that I was putinto an induced coma, because
when you've got sepsis it's theinfection that enters your
bloodstream and starts shuttingdown all your organs and you're
(19:32):
very prone to brain damage aswell, because your brain's an
organ and it starts affectingthat.
So they put you into an inducedcoma to save you, basically.
But a couple of days into thecoma I suffered a cardiac arrest
because my blood pressure wasstill dropping.
So I think I was pretty muchunconscious for two and a half
(19:53):
minutes, and in the medicalworld that is huge Like two and
a half minutes could be life ordeath or brain damage or no
damage.
Anyway, thankfully I wasresuscitated, revived and I
wasn't out of the woods, thoughI got told afterwards from my
family that they got told everyday to say goodbye to me because
they didn't think I was goingto survive.
(20:13):
So that coma lasted seven daysand then they woke me up and I
remember waking up and I had thetube down my throat and my
first initial instinct was tograb the tube and rip it out.
And I've never seen a nurse runso quickly to grab shackles.
And they literally shackled meto the bed and was like no, you
can't do that.
(20:33):
And I couldn't speak because Ihad the tube down my throat
right.
So I'm just sitting there awakewith a tube down my throat in a
bed shackled.
So not only was I in hospital,I also felt like I was, you know
, in prison, like in prison.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
Yeah, I was gonna say it's like you're in jail and
prison, and that's it.
Speaker 3 (20:50):
I was stuck to this bed and I was trying to talk and
I couldn't talk.
And then I grabbed my hand andI was trying to like it right
then, trying to write somethingin the air, and all I could hear
the nurse was saying don'tworry, like we're nearly gonna,
we're nearly going to, we'regoing to take it out, we're
going to take it out.
And I'm trying to say to himlike how soon?
Like I need it out.
I don't know how long time like.
For me it felt like hours.
It was probably only 15, 20minutes, but the biggest test
(21:13):
was was I going to survive oncethis tube was out?
And so that was the scariestthing, because I was awake and
conscious at this time, and Igot told it too, and my husband
was in the room with me andobviously I survived but they
pulled it out.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
Obviously.
If not, this would be a totallydifferent show.
Speaker 3 (21:36):
Yes, and so they pulled it out and they put a
mask on me straight away and Itook a breath and everyone was
so happy and relieved.
And then some funny things thatI did afterwards was once I was
able to breathe and talk.
First thing I asked my husbandwas did you pay the gas bill?
And he just looked at me andgoes so that's all you got to
(21:58):
say.
Speaker 2 (21:58):
I'm like yeah, did you.
Speaker 3 (22:01):
Because I handle all the finances in our home.
I no idea like what he'd done.
That was pretty funny.
And then the second thing Isaid to him was I want to go for
a walk.
And he goes Amelia, you can'tlike if you've just seen what
you've been through, I don'tcare.
I'm like I want to go for awalk.
So the nurses came in and Ijust kept asking and they're
like well, you don't have anyshoes.
So my husband got in the car,went to my home, got shoes,
(22:23):
brought them back, they sat meout of bed and they gave me a
walker because obviously I wasso weak I couldn't, like
couldn't do anything.
I'm pretty sure they lifted meup so I was standing and then I
took like two steps and I waslike no, I'm done.
So I turned around and sat backinto the chair.
But the fact that I could situp and I was alive was just a
(22:44):
blessing.
And I was so grateful for that.
But then I knew I had a longroad of recovery because, like I
said, I had no muscle mass atall.
I had to use a walker Again.
I couldn't walk properly.
I had to learn how to eat againand I was on the puree diet
again, and it was I've beenthere, done that.
And I was on the pureed dietagain, and it was I've been
(23:07):
there, done that.
I knew, yeah, yeah, I recoveredfrom that and here we are now.
So I'm 31, I'm fine now,everything's stable.
And so I decided to write abook because I needed to, and I
think initially I wrote it formyself.
Speaker 2 (23:18):
Um, yeah, it's very cathartic, like I think it
leaves legacy.
No matter what, that storydoesn't end with you.
That story is on forever.
Speaker 3 (23:29):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (23:30):
Exactly, yeah.
And and I think it just showsyour resiliency, your strength,
your heart, because that'sdefinitely not for the faint of
heart I'm over here gripping mychair and I can't like.
I've been through not all.
I've been through a few thingsthat I can relate to with you,
(23:53):
and I remember how difficultthat was, and to have one thing
after the other, after the other, after the other, yeah, for.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
Essentially over the essentially 10 years.
So over the last 10 years,every year or something, so it
all didn't happen at once.
It was literally I wouldrecover from something and then
something else would happen.
I'd recover from something andthen something else, so
consecutively for 10 years.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
Yeah, that's not an easy feat and it shows and we
can talk about things thatyou're passionate about as well
but it does show your resiliencyand the fact that, literally,
you are the odd in AustraliaAbsolutely so many with so many
(24:39):
different little things that thefact that they were flying
medication from halfway acrossthe world for you to get like
that is all very that's justincredible that you are here,
that I'm so honored to betalking to you right now, and it
(25:00):
just it blows my mind thatsomeone could be, and everything
is obviously relative to thatperson, but so I don't ever want
to like guilt or shame anyonefor experiencing a difficult
thing.
However, if we take thatexample of like, taking in all
(25:20):
this information and okay, whatdo we got to do?
Yeah, and making sure that,whatever it was it, we're not
prolonging the moment of like,we'll feel the situation and,
okay, what do we got to doExactly?
Taking action in that because,again, like you said, you don't
have time to waste.
You want to continue to liveyour life and the amounts of
(25:44):
surgeries that you've had werenot small surgeries, they were
very huge surgeries.
I have just a question whenthey did the surgery for the
pituitary gland, did that changeanything?
Were you able to signal nowyour body, to signal hormones?
Speaker 3 (26:03):
no, I can't signal, but I've done many rounds of IVF
and at that point I didn't evenknow if I could, even if I had
eggs, to be honest, because Igot too much treatment.
So I did get some eggs and I wemanaged to create some embryos.
So obviously not pregnant yet,but the fact that I could even
(26:27):
one create eggs was just amiracle.
And then the fact that theywere good enough to turn into
embryos is just a whole.
So some haven't taken and somewere miscarriages and things
like that, but that's just awhole other journey that I'm
still on.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Yeah, if you don't mind me asking, are you trying
to carry the baby or are youlooking?
Speaker 3 (26:50):
Okay, so initially, yes, and people think I'm crazy.
And no, my husband and I havethis discussion with many
doctors and with each other andI'm a what if?
Sort of person is in the termsof, if I don't try, I'm gonna
think for the rest of my life,what if I did try?
(27:10):
And so we're basically gonnatry until either my body says to
me no, enough's enough, orfinancially or whatever the
situation is mentally like.
That's a whole nother level ofstrength there.
Surrogacy is very hard inAustralia.
There's a whole bunch of ruleswhere you're not allowed to
(27:31):
advertise for a surrogate.
Someone has to essentiallyvolunteer, and there's a whole
bunch of legalities with it aswell.
Overseas is an option as well,so we might have to explore that
one day, and then our lastresort would definitely be
adoption as well.
But again, in Australia that'sa whole nother thing.
(27:52):
So we're just starting off withthe basics and then working our
way through that yeah, if I hadmy parts, because I had a full
hysterectomy I would totallyvolunteer.
Speaker 2 (28:02):
That is, that was yeah.
I always wanted to do surrogacyand the reason was because when
I was 19, I was told that Icouldn't have kids and so I
didn't end up doing IVF, but Idid do 18 months of fertility
treatments and it's hard.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
It's time You've got to have medication, you've got
to have scans.
Like it is hard.
Speaker 2 (28:27):
It is hard and heartbreaking all together.
Speaker 3 (28:32):
And when.
Speaker 2 (28:33):
It's crazy, because when I finally said to my
husband at the time my, now myex-husband but when I finally
was like I'm done, I can't dothis anymore, we were on our way
.
We were gonna go on vacationthat month, um to visit family,
and we're from Puerto Rico, andI said I have this last round of
(28:58):
pills and I'm done, I can'tanymore.
This has been a year and a half.
I'm only like 20 years old, 21.
And I'm like I just can'tcontinue this.
This is just so hard.
And so we went on vacation andthat was the first ovulation I
(29:18):
had in.
I don't know how long I had in,I don't know how long and I was
like hold.
Everything we were staying atmy mother-in-law's house was my
sister-in-law's graduation.
This is the crazy part.
I remember the day I gotpregnant.
It was.
May 25th and I was like we'renot going to a party, we're
(29:39):
going to have our own party.
This hasn't happened in so longand so it just.
It was one of those momentsthat I was like I can't even
believe it.
And so, given the fact that Ihad gone through so much like
ups and downs and heartbreaksand all the things if I had, I
(29:59):
always wanted to.
I talked about wanting adopt or, yeah, being a surrogate,
because I was then blessed withnot just my daughter, my oldest
daughter, but I had two moreafterwards that's amazing and I
was like, oh, I wish I could.
Speaker 3 (30:16):
Yeah, I had a full hysterectomy, so I can't carry
it anymore but man, that's anexample of like and that's what
I feel, like when you, whenyou're at the end of that,
you've had enough and you'relike that's it, I'm gonna throw
everything at this last onebecause that's it, I'm done.
After that, yeah, I mean itjust works.
And I love those storiesbecause, yeah, it's crazy that
(30:39):
anything can happen at any time,absolutely.
Speaker 2 (30:42):
Absolutely.
Yes, the desire was alwaysthere, but it was just like
allowing yourself to just trustthat whatever, whatever, I'm not
even, I'm not even going topush it anymore.
You're just going to allowthings to happen.
And I was on vacation so I wasrelaxed and, yeah, it is that
moment of like I understand yourwhat if.
(31:03):
So that's why I'm asking.
I asked because I understandthat what if?
And wanted to know, like I know, that you've had some surgery,
so I didn't know if that createdextra complications obviously
(31:25):
I'll be a high risk pregnancy,which is inevitable, obviously.
Speaker 3 (31:26):
But I've got a really good team of doctors now and
I've got everything lined up andI've got full trust in them now
.
So that doesn't worry me, it'sjust the whole getting it,
getting there in the first place.
That's the part, and I did.
I put so much pressure onmyself because, like when you
touched on about being relaxed,I think it makes such a
difference because initially Iwas putting so much pressure on
(31:48):
myself and things weren'tworking and I wasn't even
getting eggs at one stagebecause I think I had that much
pressure on myself.
And then I was overthinkingeverything and I think, yeah,
now I'm gonna go back into it.
Like I took a break, I had to.
I was like I can't keep doingthis.
Speaker 2 (32:03):
Yeah, mentally emotionally it is so draining
and physically like.
Speaker 3 (32:09):
I think physically is probably the last it is, it
honestly is, and so, like I'vebeen so grateful to throughout
everything I've been through, Ihaven't suffered any mental
diagnoses and I think I was onthe verge with IVF because
that's how it affected mementally and you don't realize
like I was.
Like go and cut my head open 10times over.
(32:29):
I'll go and do that put me toan IVF situation and it's a
whole different ball game there.
Yeah, exactly, so I'll getthere eventually you will.
Speaker 2 (32:40):
I truly believe in and I think that your story is
now international and I thinkthat you'll have more people
rooting for you, and Icompletely believe in the power
of prayer or intention andwhatever.
That is right.
So when you put good intentionout to the world and you look at
the at life, the way thatyou're looking at it and the way
(33:02):
that you take it on, I thinkthat creates this extra
community of people that backyou up, no matter what, and I
feel like a part of my like.
I had cancer four times.
The third and fourth time itwas at the age of 32 and I was a
(33:24):
single mom of three kids and,like all of these things were, I
would have been so scary.
I leaned into a community, yeah, and I was very vocal about
everything that I was goingthrough and I was like, okay, I
need all of the good intentions,all the good vibes, whatever
you believe in your God,whatever, however, you decide
(33:48):
that you need to like connect toa higher.
Whatever you do, just send goodvibes my way and I really truly
feel that, like, the more wehave that, the more we put our
story out there, the more goodintentions and good vibes and
good prayers and good all ofthat goes your way, and then you
(34:12):
just have to trust and thateverything will work out.
The maybe it's that there's akid out there that really needs
us, that is already like alreadyalive, that is already here,
and maybe that's the journey.
(34:34):
Maybe I have to just trustthat's the journey.
And and it was like this senseof and that was like that month,
at the beginning of that monthof May of that year.
I looked at my husband at thetime and I was just like maybe
it's just that.
Maybe it's just that like I'mpushing for this so much, but
(35:06):
maybe it's because the kid thatneeds us.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
That needs me to be their mom, you to be.
Speaker 2 (35:09):
Their dad is already here.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, and thatneeds our love.
That's all.
Maybe that's the case and it'sjust that moment of surrender
that you're like.
Whatever it needs to be.
Yeah.
And then life does its littlething and and then you get your
miracle in the end, exactlyWhatever that may be, I think,
(35:31):
even with all of your surgeriesand everything, it's just
knowing that I took the actionsteps to get better.
Speaker 3 (35:37):
That's right.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
So, however that may look, yeah, if it's not IVF, if
it's whatever, whatever it is,I'm on the right path because
I'm doing it all with goodintention.
Speaker 3 (35:50):
And a lot of people ask me oh, how can you believe
in a higher power or whateveryou want to believe in, when
you've been through all this?
Like all this stuff's horrible?
And I'm like, yeah, but youknow what?
All this, like all this stuff'shorrible.
And I'm like, yeah, but youknow what?
Someone or something is lookingout there for me, because I
wouldn't have got through any ofthis without that.
Yeah, absolutely, and, like yousaid, it's grown me as a person
(36:14):
.
It's made me who I am today.
Speaker 2 (36:16):
I wouldn't be this person if I hadn't gone through
any of that, so I've got to begrateful for that yeah,
absolutely, and I think thatwhen we like, when you're in a
place where you have come soclose to not being here anymore,
there's just a different way tolook at life, with the lens of
full-on gratitude, that thereisn't time for wasting it on the
(36:42):
that energy, that those thatthought process do.
Speaker 3 (36:45):
We have our moments absolutely and our moments are
so necessary for us to be ableto process.
Speaker 2 (36:52):
All the things are so needed, yeah, um.
But to stay stuck in thosemoments, it's not worth it.
Speaker 3 (37:03):
Oh, trust me, I have had my moment.
There has been times where I'vebeen stuck in my bed and then I
get like tell myself off.
I'm like no, stop it.
Like you've had your moment,now Get out there and do your
thing, yeah.
Speaker 2 (37:15):
I think I used to say all the time everything happens
for a reason, and then Ishifted that I was listening I
don't remember what, I think itwas Rachel Hollis, but she
mentioned something that reallymade me shift, that saying yeah,
don't think that everythinghappens for a reason, because
(37:38):
there's not a reason that achild has to go through the
things that you went through.
Speaker 3 (37:43):
True, yeah, I like that.
Speaker 2 (37:45):
However, I do think that there's a purpose for
everything that we go throughand there's a meaning behind all
of it, and so if that, if wecan take a moment and find that
purpose and that meaning, theneverything happened the way it
needed to, exactly.
Yeah, because now we have abigger purpose.
Now, with your story, you canhelp so many other people that
(38:07):
would be my absolute dream.
Speaker 3 (38:09):
That is my dream.
If I can help anyone out there,then by all means I'd be more
than happy to just be theirbuddy and just be there and say,
hey, I'm rooting for you, I'vegot, you've got this.
Speaker 2 (38:21):
I know you can do it yeah, so what's your thought
process when you receive adiagnosis?
It's not an easy thing, but Iwant to know what your process
is my thought process.
Speaker 3 (38:33):
Well, it's different.
I feel like most people wouldjust cry emotions are very big
thing and most people would justthink, oh my God, my life is
shattered, and they'll startcrying.
They don't know what to do.
I suppose mine's more of like aI don't know a logical thinking
where I just go okay, so you'vetold me I've got this now and
(38:58):
then it's all right.
So now I need to work out howlong I'm going to be in
treatment.
For what is the treatment?
Am I going to have to have asurgery?
Is it just going to be a drip?
Is it going to be this?
Do I need to stop working?
And so I just analyze my.
It's more analytical, that'sthe word.
So I just basically analyze thewhole situation and just
(39:21):
prepare myself with okay, I'vegot a speed bump ahead of me.
This is what I need to do toget over it.
Let's make a plan.
I'm all for plans.
Let's put a plan in place andlet's do it.
And obviously, those plans arenot always going to stick.
They're not always going to beperfect plans and along the way,
you're gonna have to divert afew times and yeah, yeah, like
(39:43):
you have to have a plan and alsoallow yourself to flow through
it.
That's right, yeah so it's likeokay, well, I've done this and
all this was good and thatworked, but now I've got this
little issue, so let's fix that,let's get back on the straight
and narrow sort of thing.
Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2 (40:04):
I love that.
So, yeah, I do have my momentsand it's okay to have your
moments.
Speaker 3 (40:07):
I believe strongly that people do need to mourn and
grieve and realize what'shappening, but I think it's the
ability to get out of that asquickly as possible, to then
just move on.
And I always look at somethingbig in the future, like back a
few years I had my wedding tolook forward to, or I had a
holiday to look forward to orwhatever was going on in my life
(40:29):
at that point in time.
So I always missed on that andgone.
Well, I need to get over therein 12 months time, so how do I
get there?
Speaker 2 (40:38):
Yeah, exactly.
I love that because it is partof it.
It's part of no-transcript.
(41:04):
Okay, my goal is to get to thatvacation or to that wedding.
What do I need to do for me sothat I could check that?
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
So how do you continue to smileand laugh after everything that
you've been through?
Speaker 3 (41:22):
that's yeah, I get this all the time and I think
it's just.
I always look at lifelightheartedly as well, in a way
that I don't think it's allserious all the time.
I think, yes, you need to beserious in certain situations
and things, but go and have fun.
Go and enjoy your life, likelife's way too short.
(41:43):
Don't be so hard on yourself.
If you want to go and eat thatburger, go and have fun.
Go and enjoy your life likelife's way too short.
Don't be so hard on yourself.
If you want to go and eat thatburger, go and eat that burger.
Go and have a laugh like.
I suppose that and I've grownto be resilient.
What am I supposed to do?
Am I supposed to sit there andsob every day and feel sorry for
myself like that's not a goodquality of life?
But I want to be happy andsmiley.
I want other people to be happyand smiley.
(42:05):
So I think it's just thatresilience.
And also I do think about whatI've been through in the past,
but I don't let it affect me,like it's been there, it's done,
it's in the past.
So this is now and right now.
I just want to be happy.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
It's so yeah yeah, I feel like we've already survived
our worst day and the fact that, like those are already behind
us, the only thing that we haveis to look forward to the
present, because tomorrow is not, definitely not promised, and
yesterday already happened, sowhy dwell on that?
Speaker 3 (42:40):
exactly and remember what grew you and turn you into
the person, but don't let itdefine you.
I never let any of this defineme, ever to everyone.
I'm just simply Amelia, that'sit.
Like, yeah, and all my medicalissues even now, they just live
next to me, they live by my sideand that's it god.
Speaker 2 (43:00):
I love that so much.
It speaks to my soul.
You're resilient and motivated.
What made you like this?
I think I had no choice.
Speaker 3 (43:10):
I had no choice.
That's what it was, and I'mgrateful for that, because I
gained these new skills.
I learned how to be resilient,I learned to be motivated.
Yeah, when you're in thesesituations, you've got two
options you can give up or youcan fight it, and I've chosen to
fight every single time.
And yeah, I think, when you'represented these bad situations
(43:33):
or whatever you want to callthem, yeah, you've got no choice
.
Speaker 2 (43:37):
I feel like we do have a choice.
You just choose the betteroption, because we do have a
choice.
I know some people that chooseto continue to live in that
victimhood and that, like, ifyou want to live a good life,
victim is definitely not theplace you want to be.
(43:58):
So what I should?
Speaker 3 (44:00):
say for me, I don't have a choice.
Yeah, my choice is always gonnabe to fight.
I'm not done.
I've got so many things I wantto do and I'm not ready to leave
.
Speaker 2 (44:11):
Yeah yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
I love that.
What have you struggled withthe most?
And I know that the eyelid.
I know that was tough.
You said what let helped youwalk through that and rebuild
that confidence talking topeople about it initially.
Speaker 3 (44:30):
Yeah, I was always worried.
Well, the first thing was, yeah, the staring.
But I couldn't help that that Ican't do anything about that.
I was also worried about beingwith someone like a friend or a
family member in public, and Iwas worried how they would feel
being with someone like a friendor a family member in public.
And I was worried how theywould feel being around someone
that looked different.
(44:50):
But then when I started goingout back out into public and
telling people these things,they were just looking at me,
going are you stupid?
Like stop thinking that way.
Like no, like we want to bewith you.
I'm like yeah, but don't youfeel awkward being in front of
someone that looks different?
They're like no.
So I think it's that acceptance.
Once I was accepted for the wayI looked, that's what helped
(45:16):
move my confidence.
Like I would never dare get infront of the camera to take a
photo ever.
And then I slowly started to dothat and yes, okay, I've got a
certain hairstyle that doescover most of the eye which I'm
working through eventually I'llexpose it, but I started off
doing that.
And then I would start to go tolocal places and go out for
(45:39):
lunch and whatever else I wantedto do, and then I'd start to go
into more people with crowdsand then I wrote the book.
And then that's when I was like, well, well, I need to get out
there now.
So I went into the photo shootand that's what cemented my
confidence, I think, and thatgave me the real confidence
booster, because one, I wasaccepted by the photographer.
(45:59):
And then I had all thesebeautiful photos and I'm like,
well, I need to share them.
So I started sharing them.
And then I started doing, yes,like some zoom calls and things,
and jumping on webinars and noone was saying anything and I
thought, okay, well, that's good, that's really good.
And then I've done a couple ofspeaking gigs in front of like.
(46:22):
My last one was in front of 200people, and so I got up on
stage and I spoke to 200 peopleand it was one of my first big
ones and everyone was coming upto me afterwards and they were
just, they weren't even talkingabout my eye, they were just
saying you're inspirational,you're amazing, whatever they've
said.
And I was like, okay, well,they're not even noticing,
they're not saying anything.
(46:43):
And so, yeah, I think it's justthat start off with baby steps,
go into that little directionof baby steps and then grow from
there, but then also surroundyourself with people that will
accept you, and there is a lotout there that will yeah,
absolutely.
I love that.
Speaker 2 (47:00):
So I feel like you had a lot of roadblocks that you
had to overcome, but what doyou feel like was the biggest
roadblock?
Do you feel like it was theconfidence, or was there
something else, that that thatyou would want someone to take
away from your story?
Speaker 3 (47:19):
yeah, limiting confidence, but also the trying
to remain positive.
And it's hard.
Trust me, like I'm not going tosay it's easy, but you just
need to hone in and find, likewe said before, something to
look forward, to Do what youwant to do what makes you happy.
(47:40):
Really, take care of yourself.
Like I had to learn to listento my body.
I've got 10,000 things going onat once and I was burning out
all the time and so now I've hadto learn.
Well, my body's tired, it needsrest, so go and take that half
an hour rest or hour rest andrecuperate.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
So there's just so many aspects that it's so hard
to pinpoint down to one reallyyeah, and then is there any like
daily habits or rituals thatyou say that would help, that
help you get to that level of?
Speaker 3 (48:11):
absolutely, yeah, positivity.
And from physical point of view, like drinking a lot of water.
I try and eat well most of thetime but let's be honest, I
don't believe anyone that saysthey eat 100% well all the time.
So as long as I'm trying andtrying to put good food into me,
then that's fine, but I willhave the sticky whatever like
(48:34):
the chocolate and whatever elseI feel like for the day.
I've had to learn to loveexercise.
I hate exercising.
You would never find me at thegym by myself.
So I've had to get a personaltrainer to keep me accountable
and I've got to get a personaltrainer to keep me accountable
and I've got to do that for mybones.
I've got no choice.
Like, exercise has to be partof my life now.
But it's funny, because I hategoing there.
(48:55):
I hate getting there.
But then once I've done myworkout, I feel so good and I'm
like, oh, I'm so glad I went now.
Speaker 2 (49:02):
I always say I do it for the after feeling.
That's it.
Speaker 3 (49:06):
It's so true Because there's times I wake up and I'm
like, oh, do I really have to go?
Like, no, get yourself out ofbed and go.
And then I'm so glad afterwardsthat I've gone.
And yeah, it's every day isdifferent.
Someday, like you, have baddays, there's days where I can't
get out of bed, and that's justwhat it is, and you just do
what you can that day.
But when I have a really goodday, I utilize that day as well
(49:28):
and I'm like great, I'm having agreat day, so I'm full of
energy, I'm gonna get whatever Iwant done today.
So, yeah, just basicallylistening to yourself and
looking after yourself that's sogood.
Speaker 2 (49:38):
Yeah, I think self-care that literally changed
the trajectory of my life.
So I that's.
That is what I dedicate my lifeto.
Doing now is just, my oxygenmask goes on first.
I take care of me first,because if I don't, then how am
I going to be here for my kids,for anybody else in my life?
(50:00):
So, yeah it's.
I wholeheartedly believe in allthe things that you are saying.
Any other things that you wantto just give us before we end
today?
Speaker 3 (50:12):
I suppose my well, I haven't even told anyone my
title of my book, have I?
Speaker 2 (50:18):
No, I said it because I think that at the beginning?
Yeah, because I said thatsounds familiar to me.
Speaker 3 (50:25):
That's right.
You did too, my apologies.
No, the only thing I'd like toend with was I made up a quote,
and it is.
Being positive doesn't meanthat everything's good.
It's the ability to see thegood in everything, and I
strongly believe no matter what,no matter how shitty the
situation is, there is alwayssomething good.
(50:46):
Whether it's small or big,there is always something good
in every single situation.
Like I said before, a cancerdiagnosis is not good.
You understand, you've beenthrough it but the fact that it
was my opportunity to go blondelike that was fun.
Speaker 2 (51:02):
Yeah, I'll take that, yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 3 (51:04):
To me that's the good thing about it.
And like everything thinned out, I lost all my hair.
I didn't have to shave for sixmonths like I was hairless.
So like win for us.
So just seeing those littlelight-hearted things, and yeah,
there's always definitely a goodinner situation.
Speaker 2 (51:21):
I love that.
I love that quote.
It gave me goosebumps because Iwholeheartedly believe the same
thing it's.
It's finding the purpose andthe meaning behind things.
Speaker 3 (51:30):
And I just oh, that's so oh my gosh, I was just
writing my book and I come upwith that quote and I'm like oh,
did I just make up a quote?
I think I did.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
Yes, I love that.
I am so incredibly honored tohave met you.
I feel like this we have to stayconnected, obviously because I
want to know all of the thingsand honestly, I'm just I hope
that my, our listeners got somuch out of today and just I
(52:02):
really truly, from like thebottom of my heart, I am sending
all of the positive and goodenergy and prayers and all
intentions, all the things,because I think that you are the
light.
You became the lighthouse forso many people with your story
and I feel like I can honestlysay, just meeting you now I know
(52:25):
why people don't even look atthe fact that your eye won't
open.
Yeah, your energy is soabsolutely beautiful that it
radiates light from it.
So I think that, if anything,it's just another part of your
character and that's like you'rejust, you're just winking at us
(52:48):
because you have so much energythat's exactly right but I, I,
just I am so honored.
Thank you so much for jumpingon listeners again.
I hope you got so much out oftoday.
Um, like I did, I wascompletely in awe listening to
Amelia's story.
I am just so excited for thisto be heard and for your story
(53:15):
to be out there and go buy herbook like immediately.
I hope everyone has an amazingrest of their day.
Peace out.
Thank you for listening.
Love your life.
Bye-bye.
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