December 6, 2025 • 22 mins
We’re absolutely COOKING tonight and the internet is already going feral — this episode is blowing up with thousands of likes pouring in before it even drops! 🔥
Alex kicks things off with viral queen @celiatanya who, along with two friends, had something straight-up PARANORMAL happen to them last night… the video is chilling and we go DEEP.
Then @autumnmackenzieee jumps in for the most unhinged Sopranos debate you’ve ever heard — Tony dead or alive in the finale? Things get HEATED.
@10yearsof50 tells the wildest first-date story of 2025 so far: yes, the guy showed up in full gimp mask and latex. You can’t make this up.
@carolinecronin__ restores faith in humanity with a wholesome update — she’s dating a guy who actually did something heroic… and no, it’s not “he pays on the first date.”
@carolineandcows is back with today’s filthy joke that had the whole studio crying laughing (and Alex almost choking on his drink).
Finally @carlabezanson drops the ultimate rant: “Things Men NEED to Stop Doing in 2025” — fellas, take notes or get left behind.
Pure chaos, zero filter, maximum vibes. Smash that like button, share with the group chat, and let’s keep breaking the internet together.
Stream now at BonesShow.com or wherever you get your podcasts!
#TheAlexBonesShow #Podcast #Radio #Sopranos #DatingHorrorStories #DirtyJokes #ViralTikTok
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:01):
From high atop the Alex Bones building.
Broadcasting from the Alex BonesStudio.
Live on the Alex Bones Radio Network.
This is the number one syndicated radio show in the
world. The Alex Bones Show.
One more time, I'm Alex, The Alex Bones Show, and this over
(00:25):
here, This is Jimmy. Over 25 million people listen.
(00:50):
You know, I tried to give him the spotlight there and he
screwed it up. I didn't really screw it up.
(01:17):
I said over 25,000,000 daily. Listen, listens, just go ahead
Jimmy, and kick me off with a video, please.
OK so the craziest thing happened to us last night.
It was me and my 2 girlfriends and we went out to dinner.
We went to a pretty expensive. Like alright, so far so good.
You do. So three chicks they walk. 3
(01:40):
chicks walk into a bar. Like fancy place for dinner and
it was going to be my treat because it was their birthday
and I'm like you guys let's dress up let's go have a girls
night. It's your birthday I want to
treat my besties to a dinner. OK, as typically you do, you go
to the bar 1st and you grab a drink before they sit you down
to eat. And that that will be $75.
(02:02):
Thank you. And we like met a group of guys,
whatever, or having conversationand next thing I know we like
our one single friend. We like try to do an intro and
then as we're leaving because they're seating us, he's like,
what does she drink? And we're like, oh, sensor and
he's like, perfect, I'll bring it over to the table later while
you guys are eating. So we go proceed to have a
girl's dinner. We all like ordering sashimi and
(02:24):
the steak and so many sides and a bottle of wine like we like
ordered, right? This is going to be an expensive
dinner. Very expensive.
At 33, Chicks is eating steaks and wine.
And the whole time I'm like, Oh my God, this is going to be the
biggest credit card because it'smy treat.
Just like he said he would. He comes by later with her glass
of wine and well, there's three of us.
(02:46):
So we're like, oh, have a seat. You know, like we continue the
conversation. We're like learning about him.
What does he do for work? And in the conversation he
happens to say that he's educated and wealthy but not in
like an arrogant ego way like. Jimmy, where's my headphones?
I think they're out across. I'll go get them.
(03:06):
They're they're way over here. They're over here.
I got them. I don't know why you didn't have
them earlier, but I, I here theyare.
I bet you can hear better now when you got these headphones on
and just put that right there and put that there, OK, Now you
(03:26):
should be much better, more goodto go.
What was this broad talking about?
I was just trying to explained astory that we asked but it came
out in conversation that he's very wealthy and yada yada.
And of course like of. Course, you know, I own many,
many, many businesses and an airplane and I'm very, very.
Rich my eyes, but whatever. OK, cool, you're rich, dude.
(03:49):
And then I don't know what happens.
He leaves because our steaks arrive and then he comes back at
the end when there's dessert andhe like helps me sing my 2
girlfriends happy birthday and it was like really nice but.
OK, if he's rich and you should pay.
But at the end of the day, I'm like you.
Should make him pay. Hey, by the way, since you're so
damn rich, you pay for this little soiree.
It doesn't matter right? Then when the tap comes, he must
(04:13):
have made conversation with the server because the lady brings
it straight to him. Our tap and you can see the
receipt and it's like, Oh my God.
And me and all the girls were like looking at each other and
we're like, is he paying for ourwhole, I'm not joking you guys,
it was probably a $600.00 dinner.
It was an expensive place, whatever.
So he pays our tab. We're like, thank you so much.
I was so generous of you. We were not expecting that.
(04:35):
No, he's gonna want something. And.
Then my girlfriend makes a joke like, yeah, if we knew you were
gonna pay, I would have ordered a third dessert.
You know what, after I dropped 600 bucks on you on your Broads,
we're going to do something I haven't done before, and that's
a foursome. That's she's funny, but it was
really nice. But I want to say something
about this. First of all, that hasn't
(04:55):
happened to me. I'm just not used to it.
I feel like everybody else, the table was more casual than me.
I was more like, Oh my God, is the sky paying?
Maybe because I'm married and I have a baby, so those days are
behind. Oh my God, did you tell him
you're married? Because I'm telling you, if you
would have said I'm married, there's no way he's dropping six
large on you. But also flex on this guy for
(05:17):
like saying something earlier but then backing it up with
paying which you never need somebody to like pay to prove.
However I felt like it was a pretty bad ass move that he did
that. Like without even blanking you
guys, he paid this tab. But then something interesting
happened. He took a picture.
He like subtly took a picture and then was like, OK, I'm going
to. We went to the bathroom and then
(05:37):
he like walked my girlfriend back to the bar to meet up with
his friends again. But in my head, and I haven't
stopped thinking about this, of course he took a picture.
Why? Because he expenses it.
He's going to expense this. Not that it doesn't take away
the kindness or the gesture or thank you, Sir.
Well. Of course he is.
I mean, I was pitching these three Broads on a business
(05:59):
thing, so that's why it's so much.
Because I would have had to pay for that shit out of my pocket.
So like, thank you, thank you. But also, have you ever noticed
that really wealthy people have other people pay for things and
the poor that's. Why?
They're wealthy. Pay for it themselves.
And I just thought it was so effing interesting.
(06:19):
Of course he's going to expense it because he's smart and he's
going to offload that expense tosomebody else.
So next time you see somebody really wealthy, pay attention
because they might sneak a photoand have somebody else pay the
bill. You know you have an expense
account. How do you know?
Because I used to work for a company, a record company, that
(06:43):
you had X amount of money you had to spend every month.
So if they said you have to spend $20,000 a month on
expenses, you have to spend $20,000 a month in expenses.
What if you only spend like 10,000?
Well, they'll let you do that a couple of months, but then next
(07:03):
year when they do your expenses,they're going to drop it to
10,000 a month instead of 20. So you just lost it.
So you, you got to spend it or they're going to take it away.
So it's probably the end of the month.
And he's like, I got a couple of, you know, 1000 bucks in my
expenses. I'll pay the bill and maybe I'll
(07:25):
get a foursome. Thank you.
Next. Another day, another Sopranos
debate. If you're new here, I'm Autumn.
I've been watching. Why is there so many Sopranos
things on TikTok? I don't know.
I think people are just now finding the show.
I'm glad they're just now finding it, but it's it's been
around for a while. The Sopranos for the first.
Time. I'm around the middle of season
(07:46):
6 so no spoilers past. Tony gets whacked at the end.
Yeah, there's there, there you go.
And his whole crew except for Silvio dies.
If you haven't watched The Sopranos by now, we're not going
to say spoiler alert because you've had enough time in your
life to watch The Sopranos. So if you haven't watched them
(08:06):
the whole series like 950 times like Boss, then we're going to
spoil it for you. Probably the end of season 5
just to be safe. Thank you.
Ahead. Throughout watching the entire
show, Adriana was one of my favorite characters.
Yeah, she's hot. And unfortunately, I could
totally see what was coming at the end of Season 5, even though
it broke my heart. She gets whacked.
I loved her, she. Sylvia Waxer.
(08:27):
Just wanted a friend and it really it's so sad to see.
However, when watching that, it honestly felt to me like
Christopher really did not have a choice but to do what he did
and go to Tony. Yeah, he didn't want to end up
like that couple at the at the gas station.
Feel like and wasn't wrong, it was wrong like morally
everything they do in the if we're talking about.
(08:48):
Morals. Don't watch The Sopranos if
you're looking for morality. Is that a word?
Yeah. I don't know.
Maybe. Yeah.
If you want a morality show, Sopranos ain't the one.
Not even watch the show? He knew that they were going to
stop at nothing to find him if they got any inkling that him or
Adriana was going to leak any information.
(09:11):
I've had people tell me that he didn't have to do that, that he
could have found another way around it.
Dad, there's no other way aroundit.
She was flipped by the FBI. She was a rat.
Well, not really, because she's not made, but if she asked the
dot. I really.
Don't see a way that that's possible.
(09:31):
Or should he have tried to escape with her?
But again, I I think that they would have been found.
He's a strong kid, Chrissy. He's tough, very resilient.
Why are you crying? He's going to be fine.
Thank you Next. OK, time for another creepy date
story. I seem to have a lot of creepy
(09:52):
date stories. Everybody on this app has creepy
date stories. Nobody ever goes.
You know what? I went out on a date and it was
really good and we ended up getting married.
You don't hear those stories None.
I. Actually was thinking about it
and you know what? I guess most of them are not
(10:13):
great. Well, I mean, they're not
supposed to be great, right? Who wants to hear about a
fantastic date anyway? Yeah, we would actually like to
hear about a fantastic date, butwe've been doing this show a
long time and we haven't heard one yet.
So I go on a date with this guy and it we hit it off, we have
coffee. He's really nice.
(10:33):
He works as an ER doctor and in triage.
Yeah, of course he does. And he has a very, very high
stress job. Yeah, of course he does.
He's very interesting, not my normal guy, a little bit
shorter, a little bit overweight.
Yeah, happens. I mean, I would just say pudgy,
but. Yeah, boss is pudgy.
(10:55):
Anyway, shut up. Just not the normal guy that I
would go out with, but I was I was thought he was really nice.
So we went on another date. We went to dinner.
Because he's rich and he's an ERdoctor.
And yeah, you want. Yeah.
Everything was great. He was from like the Midwest.
He had been out in LA for a little while.
He was just bought a house in the Hollywood Hills.
(11:16):
Of course he did. All right, He's got a good job.
He has his own house. This is the kind of person that
I would. Be his own wife, his own kids
and 13 girlfriends and you just happen to be #14.
So anyway, we end up that date ends and we end up going on a
hike. Everything is great.
(11:36):
We haven't been that intimate yet.
It's really been. OK, you haven't been that
intimate yet. What does that mean?
Really just kind of getting to know each other, which is really
nice. Getting to know you.
Nice and refreshing because thatdoesn't happen that often.
Most people are just trying to get laid.
But anyways, so we go one final time to dinner.
(11:59):
We go to dinner. OK, dinner goes great.
And he we, we, he picked a spot that was close to his house,
which I believe he did on purpose.
So he asked me if I wanted. Because he didn't want to drive.
See his house. So I said sure, like I go back.
Yeah, you'll only come see my bedroom.
Back to your place. So we go back to his place, and
like I said, we hadn't really been intimate yet.
(12:19):
We've been hanging out, getting to know each other.
Getting to know. I don't really know, you know, I
don't. You started it, you started
singing that song. So I just, I sing better than
you. So I just wanted to go ahead and
sing. Sexually about that yet?
So he pours me a drink. Keep in mind he is a doctor, OK?
(12:42):
Yeah, so he has roofies on tap. Not that anybody couldn't just
drug your drink, but. Yeah, he's got, you know, he can
go to the the pharmacy and say give me a bunch of roofies and
they'll go, OK, here you go. So he gives me the drink and you
know, his demeanor shifted when we got to his house.
It just everything just kind of shifted and got a little off and
(13:04):
I and my Spidey senses were up and I was like, I don't know.
What? You're going to go in the
basement with the other bras. On here, but there's something
up so. He's got a bunch of Broads
handcuffed in his basement that he roofied.
Don't really drink the drink andhe's asking me about the drink
which I find very fucking. Drink the.
(13:25):
Drink odd come. On drink it you can drink the
whole thing very. Quick, don't pressure me to
drink it right like. That's.
Weird. So now I'm like, really like, so
he's taking me around, showing me the house and I'm like, OK.
And here's the basement where you're gonna live this.
Is it's a really beautiful house, by the way.
I wish, I wish it were mine, butso.
(13:47):
It will be yours once you get handcuffed in the basement.
You live here now. Change your address.
They'll forward your mail here. He takes me into his bedroom,
which is fine. You know, like I peek in and
like look in. It's a big ass bedroom with this
like gorgeous, like vaulted ceiling and this lovely wooden
bed. And you know, like, like one of
those kind of beds you see in like Game of Thrones.
(14:08):
And you're like, I really like that bed.
But so anyway, he walks over to a like a closet area and he's
like, guess what's in here? And.
My last four dates. I was like, I'm going to take a
wild guess and say your clothes.And he's like, no, actually
there's something special in here and I wanted to share this
with you. Yeah, it's handcuffs.
(14:30):
And I was like, oh. And a whip fuck.
What is it? So he opens it up.
What is it? I mean, you found this video.
I don't know what's in it. Is it something scary?
Yeah, it's something scary. And he pulls out.
A A box of candy, maybe? Leather like hood, like a mask
(14:56):
that you would, you know, the one that you see in like the
Horror Story Place, whatever it's called.
Yeah, he's a GIMP. Go get the GIMP.
Show anyways. Well.
Bring out the GIMP. I think the Gimp's sleeping
well. I.
(15:17):
Guess you just have. To go wake him up now, won't
you? And then he pulls out a ball gag
and straps and. And you're surprised?
He's like, this is my toy card and how?
You feel now. You feel a little.
That's it. And would you like to put this
mask on or you want me to put the mask on?
I was like, no, too soon. This is way too fucking soon,
(15:37):
man. I'm not now.
I mean, look. OK, so how long do I have to
date your old grain ass before you put the hood on?
Could roll with some things if Igot to know you and whatever.
And that's between you and me later on in private.
Oh, so she's into it. Oh yeah, She could tell.
She saw that bed in that house. And she's like, oh, maybe the
(15:58):
next day we can do that. Like, like one.
Well, of course it's always in private food.
Like it's like, you know what I mean?
When you've gotten to know somebody where you trust them.
You know, me put my drink down and I Ubered home and he wanted
to give me a ride, but he did not know where I lived and I was
going to keep him out. But man, I just got so mad.
(16:22):
I was just, I was so mad. I was mad that I couldn't be
accepting of it and I was mad because I liked him and this was
kind of a deal breaker for me. I just was just not into that,
you know? How many dates should you go on
before you bring that up? Is there a certain amount of
dates you can go on before you bring the ball gag out into you
(16:46):
know, the room? I would say at least 5.
Yeah. I mean they went on like 4
dates, 3 dinners and a hike. It's time for the ball gag.
Thank you. Next.
So I recently started going on some dates with a guy that I
really like and I know it's early days.
Hey, let me guess, he's got ballgags?
I received a text from him. The other day.
(17:07):
That the likes of which I have never gotten before from any
other man and it reads as follows.
Just wanted to pop in and say hey, I'm heading over to a
buddy's place for a bit and thenwe're going to go for food in a
showcase. So you might not hear from me a
whole lot tonight. That means his wife told him to
stay home tonight so he can't goout with you because he's he's
(17:31):
out with his wife. But I'm looking forward to sushi
tomorrow and I by no means need someone texting me 24/7, right?
And even at the beginning when we were texting a lot, I was
like, wow, this is a lot of texting.
Because I'm used to not hearing from people when they are dating
me. It is very easy to be thoughtful
and be mindful and say hey, I amactually still thinking of you
(17:54):
and I can't wait to see you, butI'm going to go do this other
thing. Right, because I don't want to
be hanging out with my friends and on my phone the whole time
because my friends are going to look at and go, ah, you're
whooped. Look, you're whooped because
you're still staring at your phone.
Yeah. So he's being nice.
Yeah. I don't see anything wrong with
that. But I still think that he had to
(18:15):
be home with his wife. That's why he said, you know,
don't don't text me tonight because I'm with my real
girlfriend. And you're just like a backup
that could be a 2. And I appreciated that.
I don't know about you, but we all have our own lives, right?
Now that's how married people communicate.
We. Don't have to be tied to our
phones 24/7 and I really respectthat about this guy and even if
it doesn't go anywhere still knows how to communicate with a
(18:37):
person and that I just find thisso rare.
I was like shocked that he said that when he texted it to be
quite honest because I was like my ex would like go on vacation.
My ex-boyfriend would like go onvacation.
He went with his family to Europe early on in our
relationship. He went to Mexico a week after I
had a medical procedure done anddidn't text me once.
(18:58):
As if these places like don't have any contact with the
outside. World.
And I just wanted to share because I think it's just so
easy to do and I appreciated it and I hope.
He's a good one. Thank you.
Next. A mailman is delivering packages
at Christmas time, right? And he goes up to this house,
knocks on the door, and a beautiful, beautiful woman opens
the door. I mean, she's all dolled up
(19:20):
makeup. Just supposed to drop the
package and leave, not ring the doorbell.
That's nice, whole 9 yards and she says hey, I know how hard
you're working this time of year, how busy you are and I
made lunch. Would you care to come in and
join me for? Yeah, lunch.
Mail in says well, it is lunchtime, sure.
So he goes in, they have lunch together, great.
(19:40):
He gets up to go leave, grabs his mailbag, heads for the door
and she goes uh, uh, come upstairs with me.
So he goes upstairs with her andshe.
See, This is why my mail is always late.
You know, my mail should be at my house and I don't know,
afternoon, but sometimes it don't come to like four or five.
It's because of things like this.
I guarantee it. They they knock on the door,
(20:02):
some hot broad comes and they goupstairs and then my mail's
late. What's on Little?
Striptease for him and he ends up having sex with her.
OK, so he walks down the stairs afterwards, he's shaking and.
That would be great. I'm going to.
I'm going to apply to be mailman.
Yeah. You go be Mailman Jimmy.
Gosh, what just happened? She hands him a dollar and says
thank you. He is a little confused and he
(20:24):
just kind of looks at her and he.
Yeah, I mean, you can be a mailman.
You can deliver mail, you can have sex with with women and
then they pay you. This is the greatest job ever.
That's it. Jimmy's going to be a mailman
now. Goes what?
What? Was this like, where did this
come from? And she goes, well last night I
was asking my husband what Christmas gifts we were going to
get for everybody. And I said well what about the
(20:45):
mailman? What should we get him?
And my husband said fuck him, give him a dollar.
So the lunch was. My idea.
Yeah, you watch what you tell your wife.
Watch your mouth, because she'lldo it.
Thank you. Drive through.
How do we collectively explain to men on behalf of all women,
we. Don't.
(21:06):
Ever, ever want to hear the question ever again?
What do you want to do or what do you want to eat?
God, I hear this all the time. OK, we are asking because you
could be in the mood for something and then we don't know
because guys, we can eat pretty much anything.
(21:28):
You know, we're fine eating pizza, tacos, Japanese, Chinese,
dirty knees. Look at these.
We can be eat anything. So it really doesn't matter to
us. But it's a really big thing to
you, Broads. So we're being nice by asking
what do you want to eat? And now we're getting crap for
(21:50):
it because if I take you somewhere that I want to go,
you're not going to like it. And then I'm going to get crap
for the next week. I can't believe you took me to
that place. Well, I didn't want to ask.
See, it's a no. It's a lose, lose situation.
I happy. If I never heard either of those
questions ever again. If I make suggestions, it's
going to be you want hamburgers?No, you have pizza?
(22:12):
No, you want tacos? No, it's you can't win, Jimmy.
You cannot win with Broads. Just learn that, OK, you'll be
better in life. Still go.
OK, I'll just never ask him. I'll just, I'll just take him
wherever I want to go. Go.
(22:32):
I think you'll be in less fightsif you do that.
If you just take him to McDonald's because that's what
you want. Don't even ask him no more.
Just you just take him. Go.
That's a lot of celebrity.
From high atop the Alex Bones building.
Broadcasting from the Alex BonesStudio.
Live on the Alex Bones Radio Network.
This is the number one syndicated radio show in the
world. The Alex Bones Show.
One more time, I'm Alex, The Alex Bones Show, and this over
(00:25):
here, This is Jimmy. Over 25 million people listen.
(00:50):
You know, I tried to give him the spotlight there and he
screwed it up. I didn't really screw it up.
(01:17):
I said over 25,000,000 daily. Listen, listens, just go ahead
Jimmy, and kick me off with a video, please.
OK so the craziest thing happened to us last night.
It was me and my 2 girlfriends and we went out to dinner.
We went to a pretty expensive. Like alright, so far so good.
You do. So three chicks they walk. 3
(01:40):
chicks walk into a bar. Like fancy place for dinner and
it was going to be my treat because it was their birthday
and I'm like you guys let's dress up let's go have a girls
night. It's your birthday I want to
treat my besties to a dinner. OK, as typically you do, you go
to the bar 1st and you grab a drink before they sit you down
to eat. And that that will be $75.
(02:02):
Thank you. And we like met a group of guys,
whatever, or having conversationand next thing I know we like
our one single friend. We like try to do an intro and
then as we're leaving because they're seating us, he's like,
what does she drink? And we're like, oh, sensor and
he's like, perfect, I'll bring it over to the table later while
you guys are eating. So we go proceed to have a
girl's dinner. We all like ordering sashimi and
(02:24):
the steak and so many sides and a bottle of wine like we like
ordered, right? This is going to be an expensive
dinner. Very expensive.
At 33, Chicks is eating steaks and wine.
And the whole time I'm like, Oh my God, this is going to be the
biggest credit card because it'smy treat.
Just like he said he would. He comes by later with her glass
of wine and well, there's three of us.
(02:46):
So we're like, oh, have a seat. You know, like we continue the
conversation. We're like learning about him.
What does he do for work? And in the conversation he
happens to say that he's educated and wealthy but not in
like an arrogant ego way like. Jimmy, where's my headphones?
I think they're out across. I'll go get them.
(03:06):
They're they're way over here. They're over here.
I got them. I don't know why you didn't have
them earlier, but I, I here theyare.
I bet you can hear better now when you got these headphones on
and just put that right there and put that there, OK, Now you
(03:26):
should be much better, more goodto go.
What was this broad talking about?
I was just trying to explained astory that we asked but it came
out in conversation that he's very wealthy and yada yada.
And of course like of. Course, you know, I own many,
many, many businesses and an airplane and I'm very, very.
Rich my eyes, but whatever. OK, cool, you're rich, dude.
(03:49):
And then I don't know what happens.
He leaves because our steaks arrive and then he comes back at
the end when there's dessert andhe like helps me sing my 2
girlfriends happy birthday and it was like really nice but.
OK, if he's rich and you should pay.
But at the end of the day, I'm like you.
Should make him pay. Hey, by the way, since you're so
damn rich, you pay for this little soiree.
It doesn't matter right? Then when the tap comes, he must
(04:13):
have made conversation with the server because the lady brings
it straight to him. Our tap and you can see the
receipt and it's like, Oh my God.
And me and all the girls were like looking at each other and
we're like, is he paying for ourwhole, I'm not joking you guys,
it was probably a $600.00 dinner.
It was an expensive place, whatever.
So he pays our tab. We're like, thank you so much.
I was so generous of you. We were not expecting that.
(04:35):
No, he's gonna want something. And.
Then my girlfriend makes a joke like, yeah, if we knew you were
gonna pay, I would have ordered a third dessert.
You know what, after I dropped 600 bucks on you on your Broads,
we're going to do something I haven't done before, and that's
a foursome. That's she's funny, but it was
really nice. But I want to say something
about this. First of all, that hasn't
(04:55):
happened to me. I'm just not used to it.
I feel like everybody else, the table was more casual than me.
I was more like, Oh my God, is the sky paying?
Maybe because I'm married and I have a baby, so those days are
behind. Oh my God, did you tell him
you're married? Because I'm telling you, if you
would have said I'm married, there's no way he's dropping six
large on you. But also flex on this guy for
(05:17):
like saying something earlier but then backing it up with
paying which you never need somebody to like pay to prove.
However I felt like it was a pretty bad ass move that he did
that. Like without even blanking you
guys, he paid this tab. But then something interesting
happened. He took a picture.
He like subtly took a picture and then was like, OK, I'm going
to. We went to the bathroom and then
(05:37):
he like walked my girlfriend back to the bar to meet up with
his friends again. But in my head, and I haven't
stopped thinking about this, of course he took a picture.
Why? Because he expenses it.
He's going to expense this. Not that it doesn't take away
the kindness or the gesture or thank you, Sir.
Well. Of course he is.
I mean, I was pitching these three Broads on a business
(05:59):
thing, so that's why it's so much.
Because I would have had to pay for that shit out of my pocket.
So like, thank you, thank you. But also, have you ever noticed
that really wealthy people have other people pay for things and
the poor that's. Why?
They're wealthy. Pay for it themselves.
And I just thought it was so effing interesting.
(06:19):
Of course he's going to expense it because he's smart and he's
going to offload that expense tosomebody else.
So next time you see somebody really wealthy, pay attention
because they might sneak a photoand have somebody else pay the
bill. You know you have an expense
account. How do you know?
Because I used to work for a company, a record company, that
(06:43):
you had X amount of money you had to spend every month.
So if they said you have to spend $20,000 a month on
expenses, you have to spend $20,000 a month in expenses.
What if you only spend like 10,000?
Well, they'll let you do that a couple of months, but then next
(07:03):
year when they do your expenses,they're going to drop it to
10,000 a month instead of 20. So you just lost it.
So you, you got to spend it or they're going to take it away.
So it's probably the end of the month.
And he's like, I got a couple of, you know, 1000 bucks in my
expenses. I'll pay the bill and maybe I'll
(07:25):
get a foursome. Thank you.
Next. Another day, another Sopranos
debate. If you're new here, I'm Autumn.
I've been watching. Why is there so many Sopranos
things on TikTok? I don't know.
I think people are just now finding the show.
I'm glad they're just now finding it, but it's it's been
around for a while. The Sopranos for the first.
Time. I'm around the middle of season
(07:46):
6 so no spoilers past. Tony gets whacked at the end.
Yeah, there's there, there you go.
And his whole crew except for Silvio dies.
If you haven't watched The Sopranos by now, we're not going
to say spoiler alert because you've had enough time in your
life to watch The Sopranos. So if you haven't watched them
(08:06):
the whole series like 950 times like Boss, then we're going to
spoil it for you. Probably the end of season 5
just to be safe. Thank you.
Ahead. Throughout watching the entire
show, Adriana was one of my favorite characters.
Yeah, she's hot. And unfortunately, I could
totally see what was coming at the end of Season 5, even though
it broke my heart. She gets whacked.
I loved her, she. Sylvia Waxer.
(08:27):
Just wanted a friend and it really it's so sad to see.
However, when watching that, it honestly felt to me like
Christopher really did not have a choice but to do what he did
and go to Tony. Yeah, he didn't want to end up
like that couple at the at the gas station.
Feel like and wasn't wrong, it was wrong like morally
everything they do in the if we're talking about.
(08:48):
Morals. Don't watch The Sopranos if
you're looking for morality. Is that a word?
Yeah. I don't know.
Maybe. Yeah.
If you want a morality show, Sopranos ain't the one.
Not even watch the show? He knew that they were going to
stop at nothing to find him if they got any inkling that him or
Adriana was going to leak any information.
(09:11):
I've had people tell me that he didn't have to do that, that he
could have found another way around it.
Dad, there's no other way aroundit.
She was flipped by the FBI. She was a rat.
Well, not really, because she's not made, but if she asked the
dot. I really.
Don't see a way that that's possible.
(09:31):
Or should he have tried to escape with her?
But again, I I think that they would have been found.
He's a strong kid, Chrissy. He's tough, very resilient.
Why are you crying? He's going to be fine.
Thank you Next. OK, time for another creepy date
story. I seem to have a lot of creepy
(09:52):
date stories. Everybody on this app has creepy
date stories. Nobody ever goes.
You know what? I went out on a date and it was
really good and we ended up getting married.
You don't hear those stories None.
I. Actually was thinking about it
and you know what? I guess most of them are not
(10:13):
great. Well, I mean, they're not
supposed to be great, right? Who wants to hear about a
fantastic date anyway? Yeah, we would actually like to
hear about a fantastic date, butwe've been doing this show a
long time and we haven't heard one yet.
So I go on a date with this guy and it we hit it off, we have
coffee. He's really nice.
(10:33):
He works as an ER doctor and in triage.
Yeah, of course he does. And he has a very, very high
stress job. Yeah, of course he does.
He's very interesting, not my normal guy, a little bit
shorter, a little bit overweight.
Yeah, happens. I mean, I would just say pudgy,
but. Yeah, boss is pudgy.
(10:55):
Anyway, shut up. Just not the normal guy that I
would go out with, but I was I was thought he was really nice.
So we went on another date. We went to dinner.
Because he's rich and he's an ERdoctor.
And yeah, you want. Yeah.
Everything was great. He was from like the Midwest.
He had been out in LA for a little while.
He was just bought a house in the Hollywood Hills.
(11:16):
Of course he did. All right, He's got a good job.
He has his own house. This is the kind of person that
I would. Be his own wife, his own kids
and 13 girlfriends and you just happen to be #14.
So anyway, we end up that date ends and we end up going on a
hike. Everything is great.
(11:36):
We haven't been that intimate yet.
It's really been. OK, you haven't been that
intimate yet. What does that mean?
Really just kind of getting to know each other, which is really
nice. Getting to know you.
Nice and refreshing because thatdoesn't happen that often.
Most people are just trying to get laid.
But anyways, so we go one final time to dinner.
(11:59):
We go to dinner. OK, dinner goes great.
And he we, we, he picked a spot that was close to his house,
which I believe he did on purpose.
So he asked me if I wanted. Because he didn't want to drive.
See his house. So I said sure, like I go back.
Yeah, you'll only come see my bedroom.
Back to your place. So we go back to his place, and
like I said, we hadn't really been intimate yet.
(12:19):
We've been hanging out, getting to know each other.
Getting to know. I don't really know, you know, I
don't. You started it, you started
singing that song. So I just, I sing better than
you. So I just wanted to go ahead and
sing. Sexually about that yet?
So he pours me a drink. Keep in mind he is a doctor, OK?
(12:42):
Yeah, so he has roofies on tap. Not that anybody couldn't just
drug your drink, but. Yeah, he's got, you know, he can
go to the the pharmacy and say give me a bunch of roofies and
they'll go, OK, here you go. So he gives me the drink and you
know, his demeanor shifted when we got to his house.
It just everything just kind of shifted and got a little off and
(13:04):
I and my Spidey senses were up and I was like, I don't know.
What? You're going to go in the
basement with the other bras. On here, but there's something
up so. He's got a bunch of Broads
handcuffed in his basement that he roofied.
Don't really drink the drink andhe's asking me about the drink
which I find very fucking. Drink the.
(13:25):
Drink odd come. On drink it you can drink the
whole thing very. Quick, don't pressure me to
drink it right like. That's.
Weird. So now I'm like, really like, so
he's taking me around, showing me the house and I'm like, OK.
And here's the basement where you're gonna live this.
Is it's a really beautiful house, by the way.
I wish, I wish it were mine, butso.
(13:47):
It will be yours once you get handcuffed in the basement.
You live here now. Change your address.
They'll forward your mail here. He takes me into his bedroom,
which is fine. You know, like I peek in and
like look in. It's a big ass bedroom with this
like gorgeous, like vaulted ceiling and this lovely wooden
bed. And you know, like, like one of
those kind of beds you see in like Game of Thrones.
(14:08):
And you're like, I really like that bed.
But so anyway, he walks over to a like a closet area and he's
like, guess what's in here? And.
My last four dates. I was like, I'm going to take a
wild guess and say your clothes.And he's like, no, actually
there's something special in here and I wanted to share this
with you. Yeah, it's handcuffs.
(14:30):
And I was like, oh. And a whip fuck.
What is it? So he opens it up.
What is it? I mean, you found this video.
I don't know what's in it. Is it something scary?
Yeah, it's something scary. And he pulls out.
A A box of candy, maybe? Leather like hood, like a mask
(14:56):
that you would, you know, the one that you see in like the
Horror Story Place, whatever it's called.
Yeah, he's a GIMP. Go get the GIMP.
Show anyways. Well.
Bring out the GIMP. I think the Gimp's sleeping
well. I.
(15:17):
Guess you just have. To go wake him up now, won't
you? And then he pulls out a ball gag
and straps and. And you're surprised?
He's like, this is my toy card and how?
You feel now. You feel a little.
That's it. And would you like to put this
mask on or you want me to put the mask on?
I was like, no, too soon. This is way too fucking soon,
(15:37):
man. I'm not now.
I mean, look. OK, so how long do I have to
date your old grain ass before you put the hood on?
Could roll with some things if Igot to know you and whatever.
And that's between you and me later on in private.
Oh, so she's into it. Oh yeah, She could tell.
She saw that bed in that house. And she's like, oh, maybe the
(15:58):
next day we can do that. Like, like one.
Well, of course it's always in private food.
Like it's like, you know what I mean?
When you've gotten to know somebody where you trust them.
You know, me put my drink down and I Ubered home and he wanted
to give me a ride, but he did not know where I lived and I was
going to keep him out. But man, I just got so mad.
(16:22):
I was just, I was so mad. I was mad that I couldn't be
accepting of it and I was mad because I liked him and this was
kind of a deal breaker for me. I just was just not into that,
you know? How many dates should you go on
before you bring that up? Is there a certain amount of
dates you can go on before you bring the ball gag out into you
(16:46):
know, the room? I would say at least 5.
Yeah. I mean they went on like 4
dates, 3 dinners and a hike. It's time for the ball gag.
Thank you. Next.
So I recently started going on some dates with a guy that I
really like and I know it's early days.
Hey, let me guess, he's got ballgags?
I received a text from him. The other day.
(17:07):
That the likes of which I have never gotten before from any
other man and it reads as follows.
Just wanted to pop in and say hey, I'm heading over to a
buddy's place for a bit and thenwe're going to go for food in a
showcase. So you might not hear from me a
whole lot tonight. That means his wife told him to
stay home tonight so he can't goout with you because he's he's
(17:31):
out with his wife. But I'm looking forward to sushi
tomorrow and I by no means need someone texting me 24/7, right?
And even at the beginning when we were texting a lot, I was
like, wow, this is a lot of texting.
Because I'm used to not hearing from people when they are dating
me. It is very easy to be thoughtful
and be mindful and say hey, I amactually still thinking of you
(17:54):
and I can't wait to see you, butI'm going to go do this other
thing. Right, because I don't want to
be hanging out with my friends and on my phone the whole time
because my friends are going to look at and go, ah, you're
whooped. Look, you're whooped because
you're still staring at your phone.
Yeah. So he's being nice.
Yeah. I don't see anything wrong with
that. But I still think that he had to
(18:15):
be home with his wife. That's why he said, you know,
don't don't text me tonight because I'm with my real
girlfriend. And you're just like a backup
that could be a 2. And I appreciated that.
I don't know about you, but we all have our own lives, right?
Now that's how married people communicate.
We. Don't have to be tied to our
phones 24/7 and I really respectthat about this guy and even if
it doesn't go anywhere still knows how to communicate with a
(18:37):
person and that I just find thisso rare.
I was like shocked that he said that when he texted it to be
quite honest because I was like my ex would like go on vacation.
My ex-boyfriend would like go onvacation.
He went with his family to Europe early on in our
relationship. He went to Mexico a week after I
had a medical procedure done anddidn't text me once.
(18:58):
As if these places like don't have any contact with the
outside. World.
And I just wanted to share because I think it's just so
easy to do and I appreciated it and I hope.
He's a good one. Thank you.
Next. A mailman is delivering packages
at Christmas time, right? And he goes up to this house,
knocks on the door, and a beautiful, beautiful woman opens
the door. I mean, she's all dolled up
(19:20):
makeup. Just supposed to drop the
package and leave, not ring the doorbell.
That's nice, whole 9 yards and she says hey, I know how hard
you're working this time of year, how busy you are and I
made lunch. Would you care to come in and
join me for? Yeah, lunch.
Mail in says well, it is lunchtime, sure.
So he goes in, they have lunch together, great.
(19:40):
He gets up to go leave, grabs his mailbag, heads for the door
and she goes uh, uh, come upstairs with me.
So he goes upstairs with her andshe.
See, This is why my mail is always late.
You know, my mail should be at my house and I don't know,
afternoon, but sometimes it don't come to like four or five.
It's because of things like this.
I guarantee it. They they knock on the door,
(20:02):
some hot broad comes and they goupstairs and then my mail's
late. What's on Little?
Striptease for him and he ends up having sex with her.
OK, so he walks down the stairs afterwards, he's shaking and.
That would be great. I'm going to.
I'm going to apply to be mailman.
Yeah. You go be Mailman Jimmy.
Gosh, what just happened? She hands him a dollar and says
thank you. He is a little confused and he
(20:24):
just kind of looks at her and he.
Yeah, I mean, you can be a mailman.
You can deliver mail, you can have sex with with women and
then they pay you. This is the greatest job ever.
That's it. Jimmy's going to be a mailman
now. Goes what?
What? Was this like, where did this
come from? And she goes, well last night I
was asking my husband what Christmas gifts we were going to
get for everybody. And I said well what about the
(20:45):
mailman? What should we get him?
And my husband said fuck him, give him a dollar.
So the lunch was. My idea.
Yeah, you watch what you tell your wife.
Watch your mouth, because she'lldo it.
Thank you. Drive through.
How do we collectively explain to men on behalf of all women,
we. Don't.
(21:06):
Ever, ever want to hear the question ever again?
What do you want to do or what do you want to eat?
God, I hear this all the time. OK, we are asking because you
could be in the mood for something and then we don't know
because guys, we can eat pretty much anything.
(21:28):
You know, we're fine eating pizza, tacos, Japanese, Chinese,
dirty knees. Look at these.
We can be eat anything. So it really doesn't matter to
us. But it's a really big thing to
you, Broads. So we're being nice by asking
what do you want to eat? And now we're getting crap for
(21:50):
it because if I take you somewhere that I want to go,
you're not going to like it. And then I'm going to get crap
for the next week. I can't believe you took me to
that place. Well, I didn't want to ask.
See, it's a no. It's a lose, lose situation.
I happy. If I never heard either of those
questions ever again. If I make suggestions, it's
going to be you want hamburgers?No, you have pizza?
(22:12):
No, you want tacos? No, it's you can't win, Jimmy.
You cannot win with Broads. Just learn that, OK, you'll be
better in life. Still go.
OK, I'll just never ask him. I'll just, I'll just take him
wherever I want to go. Go.
(22:32):
I think you'll be in less fightsif you do that.
If you just take him to McDonald's because that's what
you want. Don't even ask him no more.
Just you just take him. Go.
That's a lot of celebrity.
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