March 18, 2025 • 28 mins
Are you feeling stuck in business, life, or mindset? Then this is YOUR episode. Today, I sit down with Anne Karber, a diverse entrepreneur who built her success pushing past limits, making bold moves, and knowing when to hit the reset button! Our conversation will give you a fresh perspective of reinvention and transformation, knowing when (and how!) to make powerful changes that actually stick. We’ll deep dive into Anne’s healing journey, and how she went from difficult beginnings – overcoming rehab + shifting away from survival mode – to making her own definition of success. We unpack powerful practices to set your intentionality, make space for yourself, and show up stronger, better, and bolder when your life needs a deep clean.
HIGHLIGHTS
- How our childhood experiences build resilience and fearlessness.
- Shifting away from survival mode + trauma towards healing.
- A new perspective on how to measure success.
- What we can take away from hard seasons to show up better.
- How to navigate shame and judgement during your healing journey.
- Powerful practices to shift your mindset towards healing and alignment.
- The secret to making space for yourself + prioritizing your time.
RESOURCES + LINKS
Check out upcoming retreats + more: chrissymay.com
FOLLOW
Chrissy May: @thechrissymay
Learn more at https://annekarber.com/
**GRAB MY BOOK ON AMAZON!**
https://a.co/d/63r93l6
Connect with Chrissy:
YouTube: @ChrissyMayAligned
Instagram: @theChrissyMay
Website for more information: ChrissyMay.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:06):
Attention, all my soul sisters, imagine this eight
days of pure transformation ata private 10,000 square foot
villa, overlooking the AegeanSea.
Yes, as in Greece, as in thisSeptember, where we will dive
deep in sacred circles,releasing, renewing and
(00:27):
reconnecting with your highestself Heal in the crystal clear
waters of the Aegean Sea,letting the waves carry away
what no longer serves you,you'll enjoy private boat rides
to hidden coves and a soulawakening visit to the iconic
Mamma Mia Island.
Every meal a nourishingexperience crafted with love by
(00:49):
our private chef.
Enjoy moonlight rituals,ecstatic dance, sound, healing
breath work, sacred ceremonies,dancing lessons as in Greek
dance lessons, cooking lessons,so much more.
This is a once-in-a-lifetimeexperience that you do not want
(01:10):
to miss.
Everything is designed toawaken the divine within.
This is more than a retreat.
It's a homecoming to yourself.
So are you ready to transform?
If so, then join us in Greecethis September.
(01:41):
You can head on over to chrissguest on.
If you've ever felt stuck inyour own story, whether in
business, life or mindset, thisepisode is for you.
My guest today is thedefinition of relentless.
She's built her success bypushing past limits, making bold
moves and knowing when to hitthe reset button.
(02:02):
We're diving deep into the artof reinvention, how to recognize
when your life needs a deepclean and the power of making
changes that actually stick.
If you're ready to shake thingsup and step into a bigger,
bolder version of yourself, keeplistening, because this
conversation is going to be purefire.
(02:23):
It's an honor to sit and sharein conversation with the
incredibly fierce and fearlessAnn Carver.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Thank you for having me, thank you for being here.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
It's always so good to see you.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, thanks.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Ann and I.
Just a quick note.
I'd like to give everyone aquick backstory.
So we actually met last year atmy retreat in Sedona.
And so we quickly became soulsisters and we are birthday
twins like actual birthday twins, birthday date year, and I
think she's older by maybe sixhours.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Ouch, I'll take that.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
So there's a lot I want to unpack today, but I
always love to have you go back.
My guests take us back to theyounger version of themselves,
to show us where their lifebegan, what maybe obstacles you
had to overcome, and all thegood things, sure.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Well for me.
I was born to parents in SouthDakota.
There was five of us.
I was the middle middle likeofficial middle, two older
sisters, two younger brothers.
I was the middle middle likeofficial middle Two older
sisters, two younger brothers.
I am the epitome of a middlechild.
You know definitely the loud,obnoxious, need the attention.
You know that whole vibe.
(03:35):
My dad was a farmer and rancherand my mom was a homemaker.
When we were I guess it wasprobably nine or 10, we moved to
Colorado, were I guess it wasprobably nine or 10, we moved to
Colorado.
So my childhood in South Dakotawas what I would describe as
feral.
We lived seven miles outside ofthe closest town, which was a
town of a couple hundred, veryclose to family there, but don't
(03:58):
remember really having a lot offriends.
You know we went to differentschools and it was the whole
thing.
So moved to Colorado, went intokind of more of a traditional
situation but was my parentswere very into organized
religion.
We went to different schoolsbecause my mom, you know,
thought okay, let's go to this,you know, parochial school, now
(04:21):
we're switching to this one.
This one didn't fit for one ofthe kids, so we all moved and so
I changed schools every year myentire up until high school and
then went to the same highschool.
I mentioned that because I feellike that definitely lends to
who I am as a human being.
I'm very scrappy, in the mostamazing way, I think, because
(04:44):
I'm just, I'm not afraid ofanything.
I'm not in that kind of way,because it isn't that I don't
feel fear, it's just that itdoesn't define me.
I'm able to just kind of jumpin and do what needs to be done,
wherever that is.
I moved out of my parents' housewhen I was very young, had
everything to do with theorganized religion component of
it, and I just wasn't the rightfit for them.
(05:06):
I was the rebellious child.
I was the one that was alwaysdoing outrageous stuff from a
very young age, got into troublewith drugs and alcohol.
It wasn't a vibe for me.
So I moved out with my thenboyfriend when I was 16 years
old, finished high school, got afull-time job and found myself
(05:29):
pregnant at married and pregnantat 18 years old and moved to
Arizona, found out I waspregnant like on the way, which
is then moving away from yourentire support system.
Didn't know anyone in Arizona.
My first husband was acontrolling asshole.
He was not somebody that I wasever really amazed with, but he
(05:53):
was somebody that was a means toan end for me to get out of my
parents' house, and so it wasone of those things where, okay,
this is just what I do now.
I had my oldest daughter, who'snow 28, when I was 19 and a
minute, then decided after acouple of years, I didn't want
her to be an only child.
So then I had my seconddaughter, and I remember finding
(06:13):
myself at 24, being the oldest24 year old on the planet.
All of the other 24 year oldswere worried about what they
were going to go out and do forfun that weekend, or what nail
color or hairstyle, and I wereworried about what they were
going to go out and do for funthat weekend, or what nail color
or hairstyle, and I was worriedabout making enough money to
put pampers on babies andformula.
And I just remember growing upso incredibly fast, even from
(06:36):
when I first moved out of myparents' house.
So you go from 16 to living athome, to having people that
protect you, to living with aboy that's, you know, a couple
of years older than you areconstant partying, constant, all
of these things.
I have lots of stuff in my pilethat's, you know, trauma-based,
which is again totally fine,except I didn't realize that
(06:58):
until I was much later in life.
And so I drug that around and Ifeel like the stuff that I drug
around it was like a wreckingball behind me and I didn't even
realize it.
Yeah, I didn't have and this isnothing against my mom, because
I adore her, but I didn't havea good example of what emotional
intelligence looked like, ofwhat a lot of things look like.
(07:20):
And so I just was doing the bestthat I could with what I had,
and I feel like what I had wasnot necessarily amazing, but it
never occurred to me like that.
I never was the victim withstuff.
I never was.
Woe is me.
It was okay.
What's the next thing?
What are we going to be doing?
You know, in every job that Ihad, at every business venture
that I got into, it was I wantthe next thing.
(07:48):
I was always very motivated bythat.
To me, money was freedom, and sothe freedom to be able to make
your own choices, the freedom tobe able to get away from a
controlling husband, the freedomto get out of your parents'
house, whatever that looked like.
Money was always freedom to me,and I ended up chasing that to.
What I will say now is anunhealthy degree.
Unhealthy degree because thatwas my measure of success, and I
did that at the cost of familyand relationships, not because I
(08:11):
did anything bad to thosepeople, but that I was just a
workaholic and that I would justpour myself into those things.
And so, looking back, was thatthe best thing?
Maybe not.
Would I change anything?
Not a chance, because all ofthose things have led to where I
am now.
I got divorced when I was 24,got remarried when I was 27, and
(08:35):
had my third child who has justturned 18 a couple weeks ago
which is crazy and started abusiness, started my first
business when I was in my late20s.
With my husband.
We did a construction businessand it was amazing and we very
quickly made it very successfulbecause we just both were
(08:58):
willing to put everything we hadinto it.
We started it from nothing.
We didn't have anything.
We ended up having like $10,000that we scraped together from
like a bonus and you knowsomething else, and I was still
working my full-time job as aproject manager for a
construction company, and so itwas just kind of a fun story
because we had two little kidsand then I was pregnant with
Wiley while we were doing it,and so it just it was a lot of
(09:19):
hustle.
It was a lot of hustle and wehad a good time doing it Along
the way.
We did lots of different sidehustles on top of that.
I was in the vacation rentalmarket when that first started
and since I've gotten out ofthat.
But it was always somethinglike what are those hustles
going to be?
To just kind of advance us tothe next thing.
And again because I thoughtmoney was freedom and that was
(09:42):
what was so important to be ableto do that.
So I didn't really slow downvery much, I didn't really rest.
I came to a point where when Iwas 37, about 10 years ago, my
sister that's one up from me inthe birth order passed away
unexpectedly and it sent me offthe rails.
I didn't even realize it Forsomeone who had spent her entire
(10:04):
life not expressing emotion,because it looked messy to me
and it wasn't something that Iwas interested in.
Being vulnerable.
I wasn't interested in showingpeople.
The other side Didn't want tosee it myself.
It wasn't that I was hidinganything.
It was like no, everything'sfine.
I had this joke with mybrothers that we were all dead
inside because you just didn'thave feelings.
(10:24):
It's like no, it's fine,everything's fine.
Well, come to find outeverything isn't fine.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
I was going to say it's not fine.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
It's not fine, right, and you and you find that out.
And so when my sister passedaway, I was already a heavy
drinker and took that to a wholenew level Still functioning,
still running my business, stillgetting up at four o'clock in
the morning still doing all thethings.
But my life started revolvingaround alcohol because I didn't
know how to deal with grief.
(10:54):
The loss of that and thecircumstances with her death
were such that I didn't know howto process.
For someone who doesn't processany emotion, then you have the
granddaddy of emotion, which tome is grief.
It just shut my whole worlddown, and so I spent the next
two years just taking a wreckingball to my life without even
really realizing it.
And I ended up going to rehab inI guess it was 10 years ago,
(11:16):
eight years ago and gettingsober and really realizing that
rehab isn't just them puttingthe alcohol up on a higher shelf
.
It's kind of figuring out whyyou're drinking and let's fix
that.
And it has just started thiswhole entire journey for me of
realizing what's important to me.
We sold our business back in2000, moved up and took care of
(11:38):
some family business for a fewyears in northern Arizona, in
northern Arizona, and came backa couple of years ago and just
find myself on this journey ofsurrendering to the universe,
allowing it to put me where I'msupposed to be and not really
having any preferences, whichfor somebody who is a
(11:58):
self-admitted control freak, youknow I always needed to have
control over things because, letme handle it, I've got this you
know, and realizing you don'thave anything and you don't need
to.
That's the beauty of it.
You know, the big guy will takecare of all of that for you and
you just kind of.
As long as you're aligned andin tune with things, things will
happen how they're supposed toand you can just trust that you
(12:21):
don't even have to you.
Don't even have to questionthat you know, so you don't even
have to question that.
So all of this work that I'vedone over the last eight years
with getting sober and all ofthese different healing
modalities and all of thesethings that I've done to kind of
heal the junk that was in mypile, right, I don't think
you're ever done.
I think there's always stuffthat's there.
But being willing to do that,being willing to do that work
(12:41):
and really allowing trauma tocome up and release things and
not feel like you have to carryeverything, it's been really
powerful for me.
So, being at this place whereI'm 47 years old and I'm able to
just lean into whatever theuniverse has for me, which is
such a fun thing because I'vealways, as an adult, been a mom
Now I have my baby, who we'regoing over to Southern
(13:03):
California this weekend to lookat colleges and you know all of
the things that go with that,and then he's going to be gone,
which is exciting for me.
You know I don't look at it asthis like sad ending.
It's this amazing beginning.
I've never been an adultwithout having responsibilities
of young kiddos.
So to be at this place is prettyexciting, but yeah, so that's
my journey.
(13:23):
You know I we started and solddifferent businesses over the
course of my relationship withmy husband individual stuff that
I have going on that'simportant to me now and just
always willing to hustle.
You know my drive now isdifferent.
It used to be that success wasmeasured with money, which you
know you get all of those thingsthat I thought I was supposed
(13:45):
to, and it was like check, whichyou know you get all of those
things that I thought I wassupposed to and it was like
check, check, check.
Right, fancy car, amazing house, like all of this stuff.
And I've never been moremiserable than when I got to
where I had all of those thingsand I thought this can't be what
it is, you know.
And so I think really gettingto this place in my life, where
that's not what the measure ofsuccess is, is, is money like
don't get me wrong, I still sureI'm not like giving it all to
(14:07):
the, to the church or anything.
You understand what I'm saying,but it isn't.
That isn't what what drives me,you know, being able to help
other people, being able toshare with people what I've
learned, being able to just dowhere.
Wherever the big guy puts me,that's what I do and so that's a
pretty amazing place to be.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Thank you so much for sharing all of that I just keep
feeling when I hear you speakand, of course, I've heard your
story before.
However I just always feel likethat survival, like just
hearing the whole transition ofwhere you came from to where
you're at, just this constantstate of survival, which I think
is for so many of us that havegone through maybe, just
difficult beginnings, right, ifyou will.
(14:49):
Right, with trauma, with pain,with all the things that we're
trying to navigate and, you know, making just decisions based on
what we only know during thattime.
And I just love hearingeveryone's personal message,
like the message becomes yourmessage, right, In order to show
up and help, serve and supportother people along the way.
That's how I truly feel.
What have you been able toreally take away from your
(15:13):
former self till now that reallyhelps you show up better for
those that you can hopefullylead and inspire.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
You know, just being willing to look at the mess,
being willing to takeaccountability for my part in
that, regardless of where thatmess was, being able to really
say and be vulnerable enough toshare that with other people, I
think has been huge, becausepeople need that.
People need to know like, hey,I was also sexually abused or
hey, I was also left withoutblah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
(15:41):
whatever those things are.
Part of that, too, is reallygiving myself credit which is a
recent thing for me of showingmyself grace and really giving
myself credit, because I thinkall of those times I just kept
going and going, and going andgoing.
You're just in survival modethe whole time.
Being able to slow down longenough to kind of you did that,
you made it through that, that'sincredible.
And then being able to sharethat with other people so that
(16:03):
they can also know, yeah, thisisn't going to last forever or
no, this doesn't have to defineme.
I was very, very much in thismindset of I'm not the victim.
That was really important to me, because there's no power in
victimhood to me and I stillstand behind that.
But it also can be you stillacknowledge that you went
through that.
You still acknowledge that thatwas a really hard thing.
(16:28):
And then again, like I justthink the universe puts you in
places where you, like you said,the mess can be the message,
because it does put me in placeswhere there's things that come
up that just blow my mind everyday.
If I lead with vulnerability,other women and other people in
my life, even people I've justmet, are comfortable enough to
share like, oh my God, this ismy story, and I think every time
we put words to it it takessome of the shame away when it's
shame-based stuff, and so Ijust think, being able to like
(16:52):
share my message, share, youknow, whatever is coming up for
me, that it ends up being reallyrelatable for the people that
are around me and impactful forthem.
So, and for me.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
You do that very well on your podcast too.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Thank you, yeah, thank you, let so, and for me
you do that very well on yourpodcast too.
Thank, you.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, thank you, let's get naked, let's get naked
.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Oh, it's raw and real and I got naked, you did, you
know it's one of those thingswhere I didn't necessarily know
that that was the directionthings were going.
But again, when you surrenderto the universe, then you have
to just be willing to go inwhichever direction it points
you.
And so, yeah, I do.
I get naked pretty regularly onthat show, just you know.
Again, there's nothing shamefulto hide about stuff.
(17:31):
We've all been there.
I think we all spend so muchtime trying to act like we're
something that we're not.
We're all trying to fit intowhatever this amazing mold is.
But the crazy thing about thatis even the girl that you think,
or even the guy that you thinkis that person, is that mold
isn't.
They're struggling too.
Some days they don't get out ofbed.
Some days they have all of thethings.
(17:51):
So it's like we're all tryingfor something that actually
isn't even a thing.
Wouldn't it be easier if wewere all just who we wanted to
be?
Speaker 1 (17:57):
Well, yeah, and I think about that a lot.
When, especially in this spaceand I brought this up in my last
episode is being deeper in thespiritual space and the
spiritual community, I just findit very interesting and we need
to start holding each other toa higher level of integrity and
commitment in the leadershiprole specifically, and not judge
(18:18):
so much and really lean intoallowing people a lot more, not
just words, but allowing them tomore grace and compassion in
their journey.
Right, because, like, yourhealing process looks different
than my healing process, and sohow is that fair to show up and
tell somebody how to heal?
Absolutely and that's justadding more guilt and shame and
(18:39):
judgment.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
No one needs that.
No, we don't.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
And that's where I'm having as I've shared with you
you know a few weekends ago.
I'm having just that moment ofreal like geez, like how, how is
this okay that we can haveleaders in this space trying to
bring people throughtransformation and healing but
then judging them in the sameprocess?
How, what's your cause?
(19:01):
You have always such greatperspectives on that.
Like how do you?
I already know the answeractually no, please ask.
I'm going to ask anyway,because Ann's like I just don't
take any shit.
But how do you, if you're inthat space and you feel that
someone is shaming you orjudging you or attacking you in
your own healing journey, do youknow what I'm saying?
(19:23):
I know exactly what you'resaying.
How do you navigate that?
Speaker 2 (19:26):
You know, sometimes it doesn't even warrant a
response because, generallyspeaking, it's not worth the
energy that goes into that.
I think, you know, when youlook at the compassion and the
judgment and all of those things, we're doing that to ourselves,
which is why we're doing it toothers.
So, to me, when I find thatfrom other people, it's
generally that they're alsomaybe haven't worked through
that part of their journey wherethey understand that judgment
is way more detrimental to youthan it is to the other people
(19:49):
that you're judging.
And, like you said, I don'tgive a shit about judgment.
It's not mine, right?
Your opinion of me and how I'mdoing my journey, none of my
business.
I literally couldn't care less.
And I feel like that's reallyimportant and I feel like more
people need to kind of embracethat because it doesn't affect
me at all what you think aboutme or what you say about me
(20:10):
behind my back.
It affects you, right?
I mean?
And that, to me, is somethingwhere I feel like, in general,
we all need to be better aboutstanding up for that.
And we did talk about that thisother weekend too, because it
was like I don't think a lot ofpeople realize it's not enough
anymore to just not do it.
We need to speak up againstthat right.
And say I'm not being part ofthis.
(20:31):
I'm not interested in hangingout with people that don't align
with my values and I'm notjudging you.
Please, by all means, go dowhatever you want.
I know that I feel like shitwhen I'm judging other people or
when I'm sitting in a placethat I don't know your story.
I don't know where you are inyour healing journey.
I don't know where you are in.
You may have just gotten aphone call or you may be dealing
with you know family membersthat are dealing with other
things, all of the things.
(20:52):
There's a thousand differentthings that could be going into
what you're doing.
Who in the hell am I to sit injudgment of you about how you're
processing part of your journey?
Let me help you hold space.
Is there something that I cando for you?
Is there something that I canhelp you with?
Let's all come from that placeinstead of like oh my God, can
you believe what so-and-so isdoing?
Or she didn't do it in the sameway that I know?
Well, your way isn't.
(21:13):
No one's way is the right way.
It's the right way for you.
Excellent, that's fantastic.
Don't put yourself on somebodyelse in that way.
I just think it's soinappropriate?
Absolutely it's like thegatekeepers of healing right,
yeah, like I who put you incharge.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
You know what I mean.
It is my way, or the highway,exactly Like who put you in
charge of everyone?
Speaker 2 (21:31):
you?
Speaker 1 (21:32):
know yeah, so I love that and I think this is where,
when we talk about, like divinemasculine and divine feminine
energies like this is reallywhere that divine masculine can
kind of come forward, you know,but even the divine feminine
which is so powerful in so manyways.
I just feel like it's obviouslya dance, but also a way to hold
each other accountable, and Ikeep coming back to that rather
(21:53):
than like finding solutions.
I'm always a solution-orientedperson Like I don't want to just
talk crap, I want to actuallyfind a solution for X, Y and Z.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Yeah, yeah, and I think that's powerful and I
think also that that speaksvolumes to other people around
you, when that's the place thatyou come from, right, because
everybody can just sit and talkcrap about other people or judge
how they're doing things.
What good does that do?
Maybe offer a solution, maybeoffer a different perspective,
maybe ask what does support looklike for you right now if that
person is somebody that's closeenough in your circle where you
(22:25):
would want to offer them support, or don't even engage because
it's not worth the energy ifit's somebody that isn't.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Exactly, I love it.
What are your go-to practices,now that you've really really
sat into the seat of your, ofyour beautiful journey that
you've been on?
The last several years Becauseit looks so much different than
it did.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
I'm sure 15, you know , 10, 15 years ago, no doubt.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Do you have like a certain rhythm that you?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
I do.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
I do.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
Yeah, I have.
I have probably a handful ofthings that are just musts for
me in order to stay kind oftuned in, plugged in.
I say I really love yin yoga.
I have a couple of instructorsthat are just fabulous that I
plug in with with thatjournaling, meditation, really
just being quiet.
(23:11):
I never used to do that.
I used to run at a thousandmiles an hour and just blow the
doors off of everything everysingle minute and not be able to
sit in the quiet, being able tojust sit.
I think if people did that andjust got curious, I think those
two things just be quiet andcurious about what?
you're thinking about whatyou're feeling, about why things
are a certain way.
It will lead you down a paththat I think is well worth it.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Yeah, I love that, because the answers are always
within.
Oh, they are.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
They are.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I know we speak a lot about that, but it really is
when you can take some momentsand there's God is within us
right, so all the answers arewithin us.
Absolutely.
We are so connected if we allowourselves to go deeper to
receive all the information weneed.
Yet we're always wasting energylooking outside of ourselves to
fix what we already know, thatis within, which is crazy.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I was watching this little skit about something and
it was talking about like it wassome SNL skit, but it was
talking about people on theirphones and they're like we're
not getting enough sleep.
And the doctor's like, well,put your phone down an hour
before you go to bed.
They're like what else could wedo?
He's like, how, about 30minutes?
They're like what else?
Is there a pill or a surgery orsomething we can take?
But we are so all plugged intojust numbing out with other
things that are distracting usso that we don't have to sit, so
(24:23):
that we don't have to be quiet.
You know, if you just journal,or you know, go for a walk
without anything, without music,without your phone I know that
sounds outrageous to people Justdo that, you know.
Look at nature around you andhow amazing that is.
You've never felt closer to Godin your life than when you can
(24:44):
just be outside in naturelistening to the birds or
watching the wind and all ofthat.
That's amazing.
That's for your viewingpleasure.
Whenever you want it, just gooutside.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
You know, I agree, what comes to mind right now
when I hear you is freedom, andthere was a clip just recently,
I think it was even today andhow what freedom is.
And it's not freedom to dowhatever the heck you want, but
it's freedom of choice and Ireally love that.
I think that was from PeterKrohn, who I love.
He's a mind architect.
(25:16):
He's known as what have youdone specifically the last
probably five years that hasallowed you to now be in a space
of freedom of choice, becauseyou have so much going on.
You run a few companies.
She's a badass.
Let me just say that Anne is abadass and for those that would
love to partake and have betterchoices, to experience the walks
(25:36):
in nature, maybe in the middleof the day or to do more of that
self-love, self-care.
What's your advice for the busyentrepreneur or business owner
that says, you know, I don'thave enough time, I don't?
Speaker 2 (25:48):
have time, yeah, no, which is?
You hear that all the time.
Two different things.
No one has enough time.
You make time.
You decide what's the priorityfor you, which we all get to
make that decision.
I think the biggest thing thatit comes down to for me is just
discipline, because disciplineis a commitment to yourself and
if you're going to disappointyourself so that you don't
(26:10):
disappoint others, you have yourpriorities wrong.
You know discipline is.
I have a goal, whatever it is,it doesn't have to be.
You know, it can be the things,the food, the fitness, the.
You know what is my time goingto look like, but you say, okay,
I want to do these things, andthen if you're not disciplined
enough to follow through withthose, because you're not
respecting yourself, honoringyourself enough to want those
(26:31):
things bigger than maybe it'ssomebody else that needs that
time, or maybe it's somethingelse that comes up which I went
through a whole period of mylife where it was all of my
things went out the door firstbecause somebody else needed
something, and I would alwayssay I don't have enough time, I
don't have enough time.
It's not true, right?
We make time for whatever wewant to.
(26:55):
So, being intentional with whatyour time is and where you spend
it.
I have this whole analogy thatI talk about about Skittles and
energy.
Right, I visualize energy inSkittles, but be very
intentional with where you'regoing to spend that.
So if you say, I want thesethings, I want this business, I
want to spend time, I want thisbusiness, but I'm not going to
do anything about it, well,you're not aligning your actions
with your intentions and it'snever going to work.
So, having goals that you say,okay, this is what I want to
(27:16):
have, and then aligning youractions for that and being
disciplined enough to say, okay,if it is this business, I'm
going to sit down for an hourevery day and I'm going to plan,
or I'm going to work towardsthis, or I'm going to whatever
it.
Whatever it is that you'regoing to do to advance that goal
, the intentions for that, youhave to be willing to do that.
You have to be disciplinedenough to make the time to do
that for yourself.
(27:36):
You get to choose.
Even Beyonce only gets 24 hours.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
And.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
I realize she's got a whole staff and she's fabulous,
but she still only gets 24hours right.
So you get to choose what youdo with your time.
You get to choose what you dowith your Skittles If you're
wasting them on things thataren't bringing value to your
life, that are draining you,that are wasted on relationships
and people that don't deserveyou.
Think about that, Because thoseare the things that are taking
away from you being able to dostuff in business or you being
(28:02):
able to work towards your goals.
With things you don't realize.
You're making the choice, butyou're absolutely making the
choice If you go home and sitdown in front of the TV for two
hours every night.
It's a choice.
I don't know what you want meto say.
You chose to do that.
I don't watch a lot of TV.
That's why I'm successful,Because I'm willing to hustle,
I'm willing to be the first onein and the last one out, and
that has never hurt my feelings.
(28:22):
But then people from the,because in my heart I just
chuckle.
You know, oh, you're so lucky.
I'm not a big TV watcher.
I'm intentional with my time,I'm.
You know.
I try not to be somebody thatnumbs out, because I think a lot
of people do that and theydon't even realize.
And then they make excuses.
Don't make excuses for yourself.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Well, it's intentionality, yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
That's what it comes down to.
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If so, then join us in Greecethis September.
(01:41):
You can head on over to chrissguest on.
If you've ever felt stuck inyour own story, whether in
business, life or mindset, thisepisode is for you.
My guest today is thedefinition of relentless.
She's built her success bypushing past limits, making bold
moves and knowing when to hitthe reset button.
(02:02):
We're diving deep into the artof reinvention, how to recognize
when your life needs a deepclean and the power of making
changes that actually stick.
If you're ready to shake thingsup and step into a bigger,
bolder version of yourself, keeplistening, because this
conversation is going to be purefire.
(02:23):
It's an honor to sit and sharein conversation with the
incredibly fierce and fearlessAnn Carver.
Thank you.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
Thank you for having me, thank you for being here.
Speaker 1 (02:33):
It's always so good to see you.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Yeah, thanks.
Speaker 1 (02:36):
Ann and I.
Just a quick note.
I'd like to give everyone aquick backstory.
So we actually met last year atmy retreat in Sedona.
And so we quickly became soulsisters and we are birthday
twins like actual birthday twins, birthday date year, and I
think she's older by maybe sixhours.
Speaker 2 (02:56):
Ouch, I'll take that.
I love it.
Speaker 1 (02:58):
So there's a lot I want to unpack today, but I
always love to have you go back.
My guests take us back to theyounger version of themselves,
to show us where their lifebegan, what maybe obstacles you
had to overcome, and all thegood things, sure.
Speaker 2 (03:13):
Well for me.
I was born to parents in SouthDakota.
There was five of us.
I was the middle middle likeofficial middle, two older
sisters, two younger brothers.
I was the middle middle likeofficial middle Two older
sisters, two younger brothers.
I am the epitome of a middlechild.
You know definitely the loud,obnoxious, need the attention.
You know that whole vibe.
(03:35):
My dad was a farmer and rancherand my mom was a homemaker.
When we were I guess it wasprobably nine or 10, we moved to
Colorado, were I guess it wasprobably nine or 10, we moved to
Colorado.
So my childhood in South Dakotawas what I would describe as
feral.
We lived seven miles outside ofthe closest town, which was a
town of a couple hundred, veryclose to family there, but don't
(03:58):
remember really having a lot offriends.
You know we went to differentschools and it was the whole
thing.
So moved to Colorado, went intokind of more of a traditional
situation but was my parentswere very into organized
religion.
We went to different schoolsbecause my mom, you know,
thought okay, let's go to this,you know, parochial school, now
(04:21):
we're switching to this one.
This one didn't fit for one ofthe kids, so we all moved and so
I changed schools every year myentire up until high school and
then went to the same highschool.
I mentioned that because I feellike that definitely lends to
who I am as a human being.
I'm very scrappy, in the mostamazing way, I think, because
(04:44):
I'm just, I'm not afraid ofanything.
I'm not in that kind of way,because it isn't that I don't
feel fear, it's just that itdoesn't define me.
I'm able to just kind of jumpin and do what needs to be done,
wherever that is.
I moved out of my parents' housewhen I was very young, had
everything to do with theorganized religion component of
it, and I just wasn't the rightfit for them.
(05:06):
I was the rebellious child.
I was the one that was alwaysdoing outrageous stuff from a
very young age, got into troublewith drugs and alcohol.
It wasn't a vibe for me.
So I moved out with my thenboyfriend when I was 16 years
old, finished high school, got afull-time job and found myself
(05:29):
pregnant at married and pregnantat 18 years old and moved to
Arizona, found out I waspregnant like on the way, which
is then moving away from yourentire support system.
Didn't know anyone in Arizona.
My first husband was acontrolling asshole.
He was not somebody that I wasever really amazed with, but he
(05:53):
was somebody that was a means toan end for me to get out of my
parents' house, and so it wasone of those things where, okay,
this is just what I do now.
I had my oldest daughter, who'snow 28, when I was 19 and a
minute, then decided after acouple of years, I didn't want
her to be an only child.
So then I had my seconddaughter, and I remember finding
(06:13):
myself at 24, being the oldest24 year old on the planet.
All of the other 24 year oldswere worried about what they
were going to go out and do forfun that weekend, or what nail
color or hairstyle, and I wereworried about what they were
going to go out and do for funthat weekend, or what nail color
or hairstyle, and I was worriedabout making enough money to
put pampers on babies andformula.
And I just remember growing upso incredibly fast, even from
(06:36):
when I first moved out of myparents' house.
So you go from 16 to living athome, to having people that
protect you, to living with aboy that's, you know, a couple
of years older than you areconstant partying, constant, all
of these things.
I have lots of stuff in my pilethat's, you know, trauma-based,
which is again totally fine,except I didn't realize that
(06:58):
until I was much later in life.
And so I drug that around and Ifeel like the stuff that I drug
around it was like a wreckingball behind me and I didn't even
realize it.
Yeah, I didn't have and this isnothing against my mom, because
I adore her, but I didn't havea good example of what emotional
intelligence looked like, ofwhat a lot of things look like.
(07:20):
And so I just was doing the bestthat I could with what I had,
and I feel like what I had wasnot necessarily amazing, but it
never occurred to me like that.
I never was the victim withstuff.
I never was.
Woe is me.
It was okay.
What's the next thing?
What are we going to be doing?
You know, in every job that Ihad, at every business venture
that I got into, it was I wantthe next thing.
(07:48):
I was always very motivated bythat.
To me, money was freedom, and sothe freedom to be able to make
your own choices, the freedom tobe able to get away from a
controlling husband, the freedomto get out of your parents'
house, whatever that looked like.
Money was always freedom to me,and I ended up chasing that to.
What I will say now is anunhealthy degree.
Unhealthy degree because thatwas my measure of success, and I
did that at the cost of familyand relationships, not because I
(08:11):
did anything bad to thosepeople, but that I was just a
workaholic and that I would justpour myself into those things.
And so, looking back, was thatthe best thing?
Maybe not.
Would I change anything?
Not a chance, because all ofthose things have led to where I
am now.
I got divorced when I was 24,got remarried when I was 27, and
(08:35):
had my third child who has justturned 18 a couple weeks ago
which is crazy and started abusiness, started my first
business when I was in my late20s.
With my husband.
We did a construction businessand it was amazing and we very
quickly made it very successfulbecause we just both were
(08:58):
willing to put everything we hadinto it.
We started it from nothing.
We didn't have anything.
We ended up having like $10,000that we scraped together from
like a bonus and you knowsomething else, and I was still
working my full-time job as aproject manager for a
construction company, and so itwas just kind of a fun story
because we had two little kidsand then I was pregnant with
Wiley while we were doing it,and so it just it was a lot of
(09:19):
hustle.
It was a lot of hustle and wehad a good time doing it Along
the way.
We did lots of different sidehustles on top of that.
I was in the vacation rentalmarket when that first started
and since I've gotten out ofthat.
But it was always somethinglike what are those hustles
going to be?
To just kind of advance us tothe next thing.
And again because I thoughtmoney was freedom and that was
(09:42):
what was so important to be ableto do that.
So I didn't really slow downvery much, I didn't really rest.
I came to a point where when Iwas 37, about 10 years ago, my
sister that's one up from me inthe birth order passed away
unexpectedly and it sent me offthe rails.
I didn't even realize it Forsomeone who had spent her entire
(10:04):
life not expressing emotion,because it looked messy to me
and it wasn't something that Iwas interested in.
Being vulnerable.
I wasn't interested in showingpeople.
The other side Didn't want tosee it myself.
It wasn't that I was hidinganything.
It was like no, everything'sfine.
I had this joke with mybrothers that we were all dead
inside because you just didn'thave feelings.
(10:24):
It's like no, it's fine,everything's fine.
Well, come to find outeverything isn't fine.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
I was going to say it's not fine.
Speaker 2 (10:33):
It's not fine, right, and you and you find that out.
And so when my sister passedaway, I was already a heavy
drinker and took that to a wholenew level Still functioning,
still running my business, stillgetting up at four o'clock in
the morning still doing all thethings.
But my life started revolvingaround alcohol because I didn't
know how to deal with grief.
(10:54):
The loss of that and thecircumstances with her death
were such that I didn't know howto process.
For someone who doesn't processany emotion, then you have the
granddaddy of emotion, which tome is grief.
It just shut my whole worlddown, and so I spent the next
two years just taking a wreckingball to my life without even
really realizing it.
And I ended up going to rehab inI guess it was 10 years ago,
(11:16):
eight years ago and gettingsober and really realizing that
rehab isn't just them puttingthe alcohol up on a higher shelf
.
It's kind of figuring out whyyou're drinking and let's fix
that.
And it has just started thiswhole entire journey for me of
realizing what's important to me.
We sold our business back in2000, moved up and took care of
(11:38):
some family business for a fewyears in northern Arizona, in
northern Arizona, and came backa couple of years ago and just
find myself on this journey ofsurrendering to the universe,
allowing it to put me where I'msupposed to be and not really
having any preferences, whichfor somebody who is a
(11:58):
self-admitted control freak, youknow I always needed to have
control over things because, letme handle it, I've got this you
know, and realizing you don'thave anything and you don't need
to.
That's the beauty of it.
You know, the big guy will takecare of all of that for you and
you just kind of.
As long as you're aligned andin tune with things, things will
happen how they're supposed toand you can just trust that you
(12:21):
don't even have to you.
Don't even have to questionthat you know, so you don't even
have to question that.
So all of this work that I'vedone over the last eight years
with getting sober and all ofthese different healing
modalities and all of thesethings that I've done to kind of
heal the junk that was in mypile, right, I don't think
you're ever done.
I think there's always stuffthat's there.
But being willing to do that,being willing to do that work
(12:41):
and really allowing trauma tocome up and release things and
not feel like you have to carryeverything, it's been really
powerful for me.
So, being at this place whereI'm 47 years old and I'm able to
just lean into whatever theuniverse has for me, which is
such a fun thing because I'vealways, as an adult, been a mom
Now I have my baby, who we'regoing over to Southern
(13:03):
California this weekend to lookat colleges and you know all of
the things that go with that,and then he's going to be gone,
which is exciting for me.
You know I don't look at it asthis like sad ending.
It's this amazing beginning.
I've never been an adultwithout having responsibilities
of young kiddos.
So to be at this place is prettyexciting, but yeah, so that's
my journey.
(13:23):
You know I we started and solddifferent businesses over the
course of my relationship withmy husband individual stuff that
I have going on that'simportant to me now and just
always willing to hustle.
You know my drive now isdifferent.
It used to be that success wasmeasured with money, which you
know you get all of those thingsthat I thought I was supposed
(13:45):
to, and it was like check, whichyou know you get all of those
things that I thought I wassupposed to and it was like
check, check, check.
Right, fancy car, amazing house, like all of this stuff.
And I've never been moremiserable than when I got to
where I had all of those thingsand I thought this can't be what
it is, you know.
And so I think really gettingto this place in my life, where
that's not what the measure ofsuccess is, is, is money like
don't get me wrong, I still sureI'm not like giving it all to
(14:07):
the, to the church or anything.
You understand what I'm saying,but it isn't.
That isn't what what drives me,you know, being able to help
other people, being able toshare with people what I've
learned, being able to just dowhere.
Wherever the big guy puts me,that's what I do and so that's a
pretty amazing place to be.
Speaker 1 (14:28):
Thank you so much for sharing all of that I just keep
feeling when I hear you speakand, of course, I've heard your
story before.
However I just always feel likethat survival, like just
hearing the whole transition ofwhere you came from to where
you're at, just this constantstate of survival, which I think
is for so many of us that havegone through maybe, just
difficult beginnings, right, ifyou will.
(14:49):
Right, with trauma, with pain,with all the things that we're
trying to navigate and, you know, making just decisions based on
what we only know during thattime.
And I just love hearingeveryone's personal message,
like the message becomes yourmessage, right, In order to show
up and help, serve and supportother people along the way.
That's how I truly feel.
What have you been able toreally take away from your
(15:13):
former self till now that reallyhelps you show up better for
those that you can hopefullylead and inspire.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
You know, just being willing to look at the mess,
being willing to takeaccountability for my part in
that, regardless of where thatmess was, being able to really
say and be vulnerable enough toshare that with other people, I
think has been huge, becausepeople need that.
People need to know like, hey,I was also sexually abused or
hey, I was also left withoutblah, blah, blah, blah, blah,
(15:41):
whatever those things are.
Part of that, too, is reallygiving myself credit which is a
recent thing for me of showingmyself grace and really giving
myself credit, because I thinkall of those times I just kept
going and going, and going andgoing.
You're just in survival modethe whole time.
Being able to slow down longenough to kind of you did that,
you made it through that, that'sincredible.
And then being able to sharethat with other people so that
(16:03):
they can also know, yeah, thisisn't going to last forever or
no, this doesn't have to defineme.
I was very, very much in thismindset of I'm not the victim.
That was really important to me, because there's no power in
victimhood to me and I stillstand behind that.
But it also can be you stillacknowledge that you went
through that.
You still acknowledge that thatwas a really hard thing.
(16:28):
And then again, like I justthink the universe puts you in
places where you, like you said,the mess can be the message,
because it does put me in placeswhere there's things that come
up that just blow my mind everyday.
If I lead with vulnerability,other women and other people in
my life, even people I've justmet, are comfortable enough to
share like, oh my God, this ismy story, and I think every time
we put words to it it takessome of the shame away when it's
shame-based stuff, and so Ijust think, being able to like
(16:52):
share my message, share, youknow, whatever is coming up for
me, that it ends up being reallyrelatable for the people that
are around me and impactful forthem.
So, and for me.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
You do that very well on your podcast too.
Speaker 2 (17:03):
Thank you, yeah, thank you, let so, and for me
you do that very well on yourpodcast too.
Thank, you.
Speaker 1 (17:07):
Yeah, thank you, let's get naked, let's get naked
.
Speaker 2 (17:08):
Oh, it's raw and real and I got naked, you did, you
know it's one of those thingswhere I didn't necessarily know
that that was the directionthings were going.
But again, when you surrenderto the universe, then you have
to just be willing to go inwhichever direction it points
you.
And so, yeah, I do.
I get naked pretty regularly onthat show, just you know.
Again, there's nothing shamefulto hide about stuff.
(17:31):
We've all been there.
I think we all spend so muchtime trying to act like we're
something that we're not.
We're all trying to fit intowhatever this amazing mold is.
But the crazy thing about thatis even the girl that you think,
or even the guy that you thinkis that person, is that mold
isn't.
They're struggling too.
Some days they don't get out ofbed.
Some days they have all of thethings.
(17:51):
So it's like we're all tryingfor something that actually
isn't even a thing.
Wouldn't it be easier if wewere all just who we wanted to
be?
Speaker 1 (17:57):
Well, yeah, and I think about that a lot.
When, especially in this spaceand I brought this up in my last
episode is being deeper in thespiritual space and the
spiritual community, I just findit very interesting and we need
to start holding each other toa higher level of integrity and
commitment in the leadershiprole specifically, and not judge
(18:18):
so much and really lean intoallowing people a lot more, not
just words, but allowing them tomore grace and compassion in
their journey.
Right, because, like, yourhealing process looks different
than my healing process, and sohow is that fair to show up and
tell somebody how to heal?
Absolutely and that's justadding more guilt and shame and
(18:39):
judgment.
Speaker 2 (18:39):
No one needs that.
No, we don't.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
And that's where I'm having as I've shared with you
you know a few weekends ago.
I'm having just that moment ofreal like geez, like how, how is
this okay that we can haveleaders in this space trying to
bring people throughtransformation and healing but
then judging them in the sameprocess?
How, what's your cause?
(19:01):
You have always such greatperspectives on that.
Like how do you?
I already know the answeractually no, please ask.
I'm going to ask anyway,because Ann's like I just don't
take any shit.
But how do you, if you're inthat space and you feel that
someone is shaming you orjudging you or attacking you in
your own healing journey, do youknow what I'm saying?
(19:23):
I know exactly what you'resaying.
How do you navigate that?
Speaker 2 (19:26):
You know, sometimes it doesn't even warrant a
response because, generallyspeaking, it's not worth the
energy that goes into that.
I think, you know, when youlook at the compassion and the
judgment and all of those things, we're doing that to ourselves,
which is why we're doing it toothers.
So, to me, when I find thatfrom other people, it's
generally that they're alsomaybe haven't worked through
that part of their journey wherethey understand that judgment
is way more detrimental to youthan it is to the other people
(19:49):
that you're judging.
And, like you said, I don'tgive a shit about judgment.
It's not mine, right?
Your opinion of me and how I'mdoing my journey, none of my
business.
I literally couldn't care less.
And I feel like that's reallyimportant and I feel like more
people need to kind of embracethat because it doesn't affect
me at all what you think aboutme or what you say about me
(20:10):
behind my back.
It affects you, right?
I mean?
And that, to me, is somethingwhere I feel like, in general,
we all need to be better aboutstanding up for that.
And we did talk about that thisother weekend too, because it
was like I don't think a lot ofpeople realize it's not enough
anymore to just not do it.
We need to speak up againstthat right.
And say I'm not being part ofthis.
(20:31):
I'm not interested in hangingout with people that don't align
with my values and I'm notjudging you.
Please, by all means, go dowhatever you want.
I know that I feel like shitwhen I'm judging other people or
when I'm sitting in a placethat I don't know your story.
I don't know where you are inyour healing journey.
I don't know where you are in.
You may have just gotten aphone call or you may be dealing
with you know family membersthat are dealing with other
things, all of the things.
(20:52):
There's a thousand differentthings that could be going into
what you're doing.
Who in the hell am I to sit injudgment of you about how you're
processing part of your journey?
Let me help you hold space.
Is there something that I cando for you?
Is there something that I canhelp you with?
Let's all come from that placeinstead of like oh my God, can
you believe what so-and-so isdoing?
Or she didn't do it in the sameway that I know?
Well, your way isn't.
(21:13):
No one's way is the right way.
It's the right way for you.
Excellent, that's fantastic.
Don't put yourself on somebodyelse in that way.
I just think it's soinappropriate?
Absolutely it's like thegatekeepers of healing right,
yeah, like I who put you incharge.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
You know what I mean.
It is my way, or the highway,exactly Like who put you in
charge of everyone?
Speaker 2 (21:31):
you?
Speaker 1 (21:32):
know yeah, so I love that and I think this is where,
when we talk about, like divinemasculine and divine feminine
energies like this is reallywhere that divine masculine can
kind of come forward, you know,but even the divine feminine
which is so powerful in so manyways.
I just feel like it's obviouslya dance, but also a way to hold
each other accountable, and Ikeep coming back to that rather
(21:53):
than like finding solutions.
I'm always a solution-orientedperson Like I don't want to just
talk crap, I want to actuallyfind a solution for X, Y and Z.
Speaker 2 (22:03):
Yeah, yeah, and I think that's powerful and I
think also that that speaksvolumes to other people around
you, when that's the place thatyou come from, right, because
everybody can just sit and talkcrap about other people or judge
how they're doing things.
What good does that do?
Maybe offer a solution, maybeoffer a different perspective,
maybe ask what does support looklike for you right now if that
person is somebody that's closeenough in your circle where you
(22:25):
would want to offer them support, or don't even engage because
it's not worth the energy ifit's somebody that isn't.
Speaker 1 (22:30):
Exactly, I love it.
What are your go-to practices,now that you've really really
sat into the seat of your, ofyour beautiful journey that
you've been on?
The last several years Becauseit looks so much different than
it did.
Speaker 2 (22:44):
I'm sure 15, you know , 10, 15 years ago, no doubt.
Speaker 1 (22:47):
Do you have like a certain rhythm that you?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
I do.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
I do.
Speaker 2 (22:51):
Yeah, I have.
I have probably a handful ofthings that are just musts for
me in order to stay kind oftuned in, plugged in.
I say I really love yin yoga.
I have a couple of instructorsthat are just fabulous that I
plug in with with thatjournaling, meditation, really
just being quiet.
(23:11):
I never used to do that.
I used to run at a thousandmiles an hour and just blow the
doors off of everything everysingle minute and not be able to
sit in the quiet, being able tojust sit.
I think if people did that andjust got curious, I think those
two things just be quiet andcurious about what?
you're thinking about whatyou're feeling, about why things
are a certain way.
It will lead you down a paththat I think is well worth it.
Speaker 1 (23:36):
Yeah, I love that, because the answers are always
within.
Oh, they are.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
They are.
Speaker 1 (23:39):
I know we speak a lot about that, but it really is
when you can take some momentsand there's God is within us
right, so all the answers arewithin us.
Absolutely.
We are so connected if we allowourselves to go deeper to
receive all the information weneed.
Yet we're always wasting energylooking outside of ourselves to
fix what we already know, thatis within, which is crazy.
Speaker 2 (24:01):
I was watching this little skit about something and
it was talking about like it wassome SNL skit, but it was
talking about people on theirphones and they're like we're
not getting enough sleep.
And the doctor's like, well,put your phone down an hour
before you go to bed.
They're like what else could wedo?
He's like, how, about 30minutes?
They're like what else?
Is there a pill or a surgery orsomething we can take?
But we are so all plugged intojust numbing out with other
things that are distracting usso that we don't have to sit, so
(24:23):
that we don't have to be quiet.
You know, if you just journal,or you know, go for a walk
without anything, without music,without your phone I know that
sounds outrageous to people Justdo that, you know.
Look at nature around you andhow amazing that is.
You've never felt closer to Godin your life than when you can
(24:44):
just be outside in naturelistening to the birds or
watching the wind and all ofthat.
That's amazing.
That's for your viewingpleasure.
Whenever you want it, just gooutside.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
You know, I agree, what comes to mind right now
when I hear you is freedom, andthere was a clip just recently,
I think it was even today andhow what freedom is.
And it's not freedom to dowhatever the heck you want, but
it's freedom of choice and Ireally love that.
I think that was from PeterKrohn, who I love.
He's a mind architect.
(25:16):
He's known as what have youdone specifically the last
probably five years that hasallowed you to now be in a space
of freedom of choice, becauseyou have so much going on.
You run a few companies.
She's a badass.
Let me just say that Anne is abadass and for those that would
love to partake and have betterchoices, to experience the walks
(25:36):
in nature, maybe in the middleof the day or to do more of that
self-love, self-care.
What's your advice for the busyentrepreneur or business owner
that says, you know, I don'thave enough time, I don't?
Speaker 2 (25:48):
have time, yeah, no, which is?
You hear that all the time.
Two different things.
No one has enough time.
You make time.
You decide what's the priorityfor you, which we all get to
make that decision.
I think the biggest thing thatit comes down to for me is just
discipline, because disciplineis a commitment to yourself and
if you're going to disappointyourself so that you don't
(26:10):
disappoint others, you have yourpriorities wrong.
You know discipline is.
I have a goal, whatever it is,it doesn't have to be.
You know, it can be the things,the food, the fitness, the.
You know what is my time goingto look like, but you say, okay,
I want to do these things, andthen if you're not disciplined
enough to follow through withthose, because you're not
respecting yourself, honoringyourself enough to want those
(26:31):
things bigger than maybe it'ssomebody else that needs that
time, or maybe it's somethingelse that comes up which I went
through a whole period of mylife where it was all of my
things went out the door firstbecause somebody else needed
something, and I would alwayssay I don't have enough time, I
don't have enough time.
It's not true, right?
We make time for whatever wewant to.
(26:55):
So, being intentional with whatyour time is and where you spend
it.
I have this whole analogy thatI talk about about Skittles and
energy.
Right, I visualize energy inSkittles, but be very
intentional with where you'regoing to spend that.
So if you say, I want thesethings, I want this business, I
want to spend time, I want thisbusiness, but I'm not going to
do anything about it, well,you're not aligning your actions
with your intentions and it'snever going to work.
So, having goals that you say,okay, this is what I want to
(27:16):
have, and then aligning youractions for that and being
disciplined enough to say, okay,if it is this business, I'm
going to sit down for an hourevery day and I'm going to plan,
or I'm going to work towardsthis, or I'm going to whatever
it.
Whatever it is that you'regoing to do to advance that goal
, the intentions for that, youhave to be willing to do that.
You have to be disciplinedenough to make the time to do
that for yourself.
(27:36):
You get to choose.
Even Beyonce only gets 24 hours.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
And.
Speaker 2 (27:40):
I realize she's got a whole staff and she's fabulous,
but she still only gets 24hours right.
So you get to choose what youdo with your time.
You get to choose what you dowith your Skittles If you're
wasting them on things thataren't bringing value to your
life, that are draining you,that are wasted on relationships
and people that don't deserveyou.
Think about that, Because thoseare the things that are taking
away from you being able to dostuff in business or you being
(28:02):
able to work towards your goals.
With things you don't realize.
You're making the choice, butyou're absolutely making the
choice If you go home and sitdown in front of the TV for two
hours every night.
It's a choice.
I don't know what you want meto say.
You chose to do that.
I don't watch a lot of TV.
That's why I'm successful,Because I'm willing to hustle,
I'm willing to be the first onein and the last one out, and
that has never hurt my feelings.
(28:22):
But then people from the,because in my heart I just
chuckle.
You know, oh, you're so lucky.
I'm not a big TV watcher.
I'm intentional with my time,I'm.
You know.
I try not to be somebody thatnumbs out, because I think a lot
of people do that and theydon't even realize.
And then they make excuses.
Don't make excuses for yourself.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Well, it's intentionality, yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:47):
That's what it comes down to.
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