Speaking Engagement on Mediumship: Questions, Myths, & Stories

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 01 (00:01):
Welcome back to All Is Not Lost Podcast.
I'm your host, psychic medium,Rhiann Maldonado.
It's been a little while sinceI've been behind the microphone,
but I'm back today with aspecial episode.
I'm also hoping to return to amore regular podcast schedule by
mid to late July, but nopromises just yet.

(00:22):
Let's dive in.
I was recently invited to givea presentation on mediumship for
a metaphysical group a fewtowns away.
and I jumped at the chance.
I had such a great time puttingtogether the slideshow and I
decided to break it up intothree parts.
First, I covered commonquestions I often get as a

(00:44):
working professional medium.
Then I addressed some of themost frequent myths I've come
across in the world of psychicand mediumship work.
Finally, I left a little timeat the end to share some
personal stories.
I was lucky to have my sonthere to help with the audio and
video recording along with allthe technical bits, so a huge

(01:05):
shout out to him.
Because of his support, I'mable to share this recording
with you today.
A couple of quick notes.
While recording, I didn'talways read each question or
myth from my slideshow in a waythat clearly separates them out
for audio listeners, so I'll domy best to include a list of
those questions and myths in theshow notes for easy reference.

(01:27):
Please also note that you maynotice in my recording that
There's an area where I haveedited out a name due to
confidentiality reasons, butthat doesn't matter because the
story is what I really want toshare with you.
After listening back to therecording, I got really excited
about doing anotherpresentation, especially since

(01:48):
there were so many topics Ididn't get to include this time
around.
So stay tuned.
I've been invited to speakagain later this year, likely in
late fall or early winter oncethe snowbirds return.
So with that little bit ofbackground, let's jump right in.
I'll cue up the music and thenwe'll head straight into the
presentation.
I hope you enjoy it as much asI did putting it together.

Speaker 00 (02:17):
Does it go?
The

Speaker 01 (02:19):
fact is, spirit does survive death.
Our loved ones are all aroundus.
Love survives.
Spirit survives.
All is not lost.

Speaker 00 (02:32):
Welcome to the All Is Not Lost Podcast.
Here's your host, psychic andevidential medium, Rian
Maldonado.

Speaker 01 (02:44):
Thank you.
Thank you.
I first want to thank Deb somuch for inviting me today.
And thank all of you for comingout.
As I was driving here fromTucson, it was 112.
My friends back east, I'm like,is it winter yet?
And they're like, thumbsdowning me.
I'm like, it's 112.
So thanks so much for comingout.

(03:06):
It's great to see all these newfaces and be a part of your
group.
So thank you.
My name is Rianne Maldonado.
I am a spiritualist ministerand a psychic medium.
That is my son back there.
He's not going to be takingpictures of any of you, but he
is my roadie crew, my tech guypictures.

(03:27):
social media, that kind ofstuff.
Because I don't want any partof that.
I'm like, I talk to deadpeople, you do the rest.
So I have an outline for todaybecause the number one thing
that I find is if I go anywhere,people just want to ask me
questions.
They just want to know, howdoes it work?

(03:48):
What does it feel like?
How'd you find out?
And so I've kind of developedthis plan of attack for
answering common questions andthen debunking some myths, in my
opinion.
And then, depending on time, atthe end, I do try to leave time
for storytelling of how did Iget into this?

(04:12):
Because that is people's numberone question.
And I will say that I do have apodcast.
I'm on a little break rightnow, but every episode is
available, and I'll put that up.
If you really are bored one dayand you want to listen to an
hour episode about how I gotinto this, it's there.
And it's a wild ride.
It's a wild ride.
Let's see.

(04:34):
I try not to say all the ums.
It happens sometimes.
So...
I have learned so much fromSpirit.
I've learned so much aboutmyself and about people in
general on this journey, and Ilove to share it.
I tell my husband, the minute Istop being amazed by Spirit is

(04:56):
the minute I'm going to stopoffering readings because I'm
still amazed every day.
I will do a reading, a privatereading for somebody and just be
floored at the information thatcomes through from Spirit.
Even after all these years, itstill amazes me that I can get
these messages for people.
And I want it to always be thatway.

(05:16):
So if it's not, then I'm notgoing to do it.
I do private readings.
I do speaking engagements.
I do group events, things likethat, unless I'm asked to be
like a party trick.
I don't do those because I takeit very seriously what I do.
I mean, I have fun with it, butI do take it seriously.
So a little bit of, let's see,I am going to cover so many

(05:40):
typical questions.
I'm okay with you askingquestions, but we kind of have
to keep it going since I've onlygot an hour-ish.
And I would like to save timeat the end, because if I feel
that I can do a reading forsomebody, I will.
But I'm always open toquestions.
It just might be answered.
I do not get into politicallycharged discussions or religious

(06:04):
topics.
I am a spiritualist ministerbecause it's the most
non-religion religion.
And only because of themediumship.
But I will not talk aboutwhat's going on in the world
anywhere right now or whatspirit thinks about that.
I don't make predictions oranything like that.
So please don't ask me thosequestions.

(06:25):
It's just too divisive.
All righty.
And if you see typos, Iapologize.
I did this without my glasseson.
And I'm just now at the age,the last couple years, where I
need my readers.
But then I put them on, and Igot to read.
And then I got to take them offto see you, and it just makes
me dizzy.
So just pretend you don't seethem.

(06:45):
So I get a little flack fromsome people that apparently love
me that I do too much.
And I did a whole podcastepisode on this because I really
believe that we're put on thisplanet to have experiences.
And I look at it like a buffet.

(07:06):
And let's just use the wordGod.
You don't have to believe inGod.
We don't have to say God.
But I'm going to just use theword God, the universe, the
creator, whatever.
Say we were put here.
I think it would be offensiveto not try things.
You know, it's like you offeryour children a bunch of stuff
and they don't want to doanything.
It's just kind of boring.
So I like to learn a lot ofthings.

(07:26):
I constantly learn.
I go down one path and it leadsme to another path.
So overall though, the thingthat I link all of my
credentials to is help andhealing for myself and others.
Whether it's physical,emotional, spiritual, You know,

(07:47):
I do Reiki, I'm a spiritualistminister, I do my podcast, I
weirdly am also a licensedprivate investigator.
Because I'm married to anex-cop who wanted to be, and I'm
a Scorpio, so we dig.
And I also teach aesthetics atthe Aveda Institute in Tucson.
So I'm a licensed esthetician.

(08:08):
But generally, that physicaltouch leads to some emotional
and spiritual healing.
So it all just kind of goestogether.
I am a wife and a mom of fivekids.
And I talk about the work thatI do as like, on the spectrum,
okay?
Let's be funny for a minute.

(08:28):
At one end of the spectrum,imagine the lady in the turban
in the dark tent telling youyou're gonna meet the love of
your life on Tuesday, but you'llbe dead on Wednesday.
That's not me.
Then there's this other end.
I just happen to be thistypical mom person who does this
really weird thing.
So that's the way I like tolook at it.

(08:49):
So the reason I bring that upis that I don't give you
information like during areading that I can't at least
somewhat validate.
The example I give is whenpeople say, what does heaven
look like?
Spirit told me heaven lookslike endless summer.
Well, I hate summer.
Like I hate, that's not heavento me.

(09:11):
So wherever I'm going to go, Iwant it to be cold, like a cabin
in the woods with some snow,hot cup of coffee.
So I can't tell you If spirittold me heaven looks like this
or we go here when we die, Idon't know that that didn't come
from a dream or a movie orsomething.
So I shy away from those kindsof things.

(09:33):
But if I can tell you yourgrandmother lived in a yellow
house and her favorite color isblue and she had a little white
dog, that can be validated,correct?
So that's more the way I try todo my work.
So even though I do a lot ofthings and my mom says I do too
much, well, you know, oh well.

(09:55):
I don't know.
I like all the things that Ido.
OK, so if you have questionsabout any of that, we can get
into that later.
But I just kind of wanted youto see a little bit more about
me.
So we're going to go over somecommon questions, as I
mentioned, and then some myths.
Because there's a lot of mythsout there about what psychic
mediumship is.
how to reach me, and then likeI said, if we have time at the

(10:18):
end, hopefully we can do storytime and maybe a reading.
Okay, so a show of hands.
Do you, because you guys are ametaphysical group, so I don't
know what I'm working with here,but I'm assuming you know a

(10:40):
lot, and maybe some of this isstuff you've already heard, but
How many of you would say youhave an understanding of the
difference between a psychic anda medium?
Okay, good amount of the group.
Okay, so we like to say allmediums are psychic, but not all
psychics are mediums.
So if I'm doing a psychicreading, sometimes there's

(11:03):
people that come to me and theyjust need guidance with their
life.
They're having trouble with arelationship or a career move or
something big in their life,and they really just need
guidance about their health orsomething like that.
They will come for a psychicreading.
That's where I'm going to tapinto you and the feelings I get.
And it's very interesting whenI'm doing those kind of

(11:23):
readings, how it comes throughin my body.
I'll be getting ready, let'ssay, to be on the phone with
somebody.
a new client and I have mylittle meditation ritual that I
do, and I might notice that Istart rubbing some part of my
body.
And I'm like, there's nothingwrong with my leg.
And then I'm like, oh yeah,it's probably for my client.

(11:44):
And I get on the phone with myclient and I'm like, what's
wrong with your left leg?
Oh, I just had surgery.
I need surgery.
So that's kind of how psychicworks.
It's stuff like that.
Mediumship is when I connectwith your loved ones on the
other side.
So two very distinct differentthings.
They do have some overlap.
And sometimes I'll start outdoing a psychic reading for

(12:04):
somebody.
And now, mind you, my mentor inEngland would yell at me for
saying that.
She's appalled at psychics.
But because you should nevermix.
Anyway, I will sometimes bestarting out doing a psychic
reading for somebody and thengrandma will come in or grandpa
will come in and they've gotsomething to say.
So sometimes that psychicguidance that's coming from me

(12:28):
and my spirit is then added toor complimented by somebody from
the other side.
But then I do pause and say,okay, this is no longer coming
from me.
This is coming from yourgrandfather, your mother, your
dog, right?
So those are the bigdifferences between a psychic
and a medium.
So like I said, we say that allmediums are psychic, but not

(12:50):
all psychics are mediums becauseyou have to be somewhat psychic
and tapped in to talk tospirit.
But you don't have to talk tospirit to be psychic and give a
psychic greeting.
Make sense?
Okay.
So can I turn it on?
on or off.
I get asked this all the time.
And I know that there are goingto be varying opinions.

(13:12):
Please know that everything Italk about today is just from my
experience.
There's no judgment.
If you have another opinion oryou've had another experience
with it, this is really trulyjust how I have embraced what it
is that I do.
So I often hear people say, ohmy gosh, I'm bombarded by spirit
all the time.

(13:33):
Oh, they're all around me allthe time.
They talk to me all the time.
I can't sleep.
I can't do this.
To me and in my experience,that's poor boundaries.
I'm not bombarded all the time.
I'm bombarded by my childrenall the time.
My son may be 28, but hisyoungest sister is nine.
I have four little ones.
I started over.
So I don't need to be bombardedby spirit and the living.

(13:55):
That would just be too much.
So I don't necessarily need toturn it on or turn it off, but I
do set boundaries.
So I know, I like to joke whenI'm teaching people individually
or mentoring somebody that Ioften say, okay, you're in
charge.
You're alive.
They're not.

(14:15):
You're allowed to say, and I'msilly about this, I only want to
have a visit from you onTuesdays at 2 p.m.
Spirit has to listen to you.
If you believe that you havethe boundaries, then spirit will
honor your boundaries.
Perfect example of this.
My children all know what I do.
I'm the weird mom at theschool, and that's okay.

(14:38):
But my youngest, a couple ofyears ago, she came screaming in
the room at 5.30 in themorning, there's a man in my
room! And my husband, the cop,jumps out of bed like, what are
you talking about?
I just knew, I'm like, it'sjust the spirit.
And Somehow I just knew.
And so I talked to her becauseshe was a little scared.

(14:59):
She'd been laying in her bedand she saw a man playing with
her toys and then it moved overto the other side of her room.
Really freaked out.
She was like six or seven atthe time, understandably.
But what was interesting isthat day, later that day, I had
a Reiki client for the firsttime.
And He was, he's profoundlydeaf, and I had only known him

(15:22):
as he had been my sign languageinstructor, but he has now
booked a Reiki appointment withme.
And often before I'm going todo a reading or a Reiki
appointment or things like that,I meditate a little bit and
kind of see what I'm getting,and it was weird.
I didn't make the connection,but that morning laying in bed,
I was hearing, like a child.
Like a child.

(15:44):
I just heard this phrase overand over in my head.
So when my daughter came in, itwas like a light bulb went off.
This person that was in herroom was not going to harm her.
Later, long story short, I madethe connection with my Reiki
client that his uncle Nikki wasvisiting.
And the like a child was eventhough he had passed in his

(16:07):
early 40s, he had the mentalcapacity of an eight-year-old.
So he was like a child, and hedid want to play with her toys.
But back to turning it off andturning it on and having
boundaries, my daughterexpressed very clearly, love
what you do, Mom, but I don'twant him in my room.
And so I said, all right, let'sset some boundaries.
And we spoke together out loud,and she said, Spirit, you can

(16:30):
visit my mom anytime you want.
Don't come in my room.
Don't talk to me.
I'm not ready for it.
She's never been botheredagain.
So you're in charge.
They're not.
They tend to respect that.
That's my take on it.
I'll get to ethics laterbecause it's important, but this
does overlap a little bit.
While I can be receptive to anytime, if spirit really wants to

(16:56):
get me, they kind of will nagat me if it's important.
But I, again, we'll get intothis with ethics.
I will not just approach astranger and deliver a message.
I just won't.
So I have to set a boundary atthat time that spirit, if you
need me to deliver this messageto that person over there,
you're going to have to find away to naturally introduce us

(17:17):
because I am not going to justgo up and deliver a message.
It's just not the right thingto do.
Can I read your mind?
Am I sitting here looking atany of you?
Reading your mind.
No, I don't try to.
That's too much work for me.
I don't need all thatinformation.
Plus, it would probably make mescared that you don't like me
or something.
I don't want to think aboutthose things.

(17:38):
Now, obviously, if we're in anappointment and I'm sitting down
across from you and I'mfocusing on you, the goal is to
know you and understand what'sgoing on with you so I can help
you.
That's different.
But do I just walk aroundtrying to psychically spy on
people?
Absolutely not.
Again, too It's so much work, Idon't care, I don't need that
much information, and it's notmy business, it's rude.

(17:59):
So I wouldn't do that.
Okay, are dead people scary?
I hear this so much, like, ooh,you're messing with something
scary, and dead people can hurtyou.
In my experience and myopinion, absolutely not.
The living are far scarier thanthe dead.
100%.

(18:20):
Generally, I want to treat themthe utmost respect and find out
what they need, why they'rehere, what I could maybe learn
from them or share about them.
I do not think they're going topush me down the stairs or do
bad things to me.
Yet if you listen to thatepisode in my podcast, you will

(18:42):
see I haven't always felt thisway.
That was when it was very new.
and I didn't understand.
Now that I've had some years ofexperience working with spirit,
I'm 100% not afraid.
Later when we get to what doesit feel like, I will explain
there are times that I feelafraid or yucky for a moment

(19:05):
while I'm trying to understandwhat it is they want me to say
or understand.
But it goes away as soon as Imake the connection.
So I'm still far more afraidthat I might be ax-murdered on
the way to my car in the darkthan I am of spirit pushing me
downstairs or harming me.
Okay, we talked about in chargeand boundaries.

(19:26):
You are in charge.
So I'm not gonna go over thatagain.
It really, if you havequestions about it later, we
totally can talk about itbecause I know that that could
be a very polarizing opinion Youknow, if there are people who
firmly believe that they'rebeing bothered by spirit all the

(19:47):
time, it's very hard toconvince them otherwise.
And it's not that it's my jobto convince anybody.
People need to believe whatthey need to believe.
But that right there is kind ofthe crux of it.
If you believe that spirit canharm you, maybe they can.
I just don't believe that theycan, so they don't harm me.

(20:07):
Okay, during a reading...
what and who we want versuswhat and who we get.
So if you visit my website,there's a page on there about
what to expect and how toprepare for a reading.
I always say come with an openheart and an open mind.
If you come to a medium or apsychic and you only want to

(20:29):
hear from Uncle Joe and you willnot be satisfied unless you
hear from Uncle Joe, you mayleave disappointed.
And you might be like, that wasthe worst reading I ever had.
My Uncle Joe didn't comethrough.
Well, I cannot control...
100% who comes through.
Probably not even 20%.
I can try.
But the universe gives us whatwe need, not always what we

(20:52):
want.
And so we really, really haveto be open to what we're
supposed to hear.
Sometimes, though, I'll startwith a client and I'll be
delivering some information.
It'll all be going great.
And then it's kind of like, runits course for that time but we

(21:13):
have some time left i usuallyallot a certain amount of time
for a private reading andtowards the end i might say was
there somebody else that youwanted to hear from today that
you were hoping would comethrough and sometimes they're
like yeah i was really hopingyou know my mom would come
through and so i'll say can ihave your mom's name please and
i'll write it on my littlenotepad and then i'll focus for

(21:34):
a minute and i will invite momto come through and see if
there's anything mom has to say.
And sometimes, more often thannot, we'll get a little
something validating for thatperson just to know it's a hello
from mom, whatever she has tosay to send this person off from
their appointment.
feeling like they got not onlywhat they needed, but a little

(21:55):
bit of something that theywanted.
So anytime you go for areading, just know that it's
okay to totally have a want.
Be open to what you need,though, as well.
Okay.
This is like number one partyquestion.
What does it feel like?

(22:15):
So every medium...
or psychic will probably tellyou a different story, how it
feels for them.
So for me, it doesn't hurt.
Even if I have to tell you howyour loved one passed, I might
feel like a shortness of breath.
I might feel liquid in mylungs.
I might be like, oh, this waslike COPD.

(22:37):
This was pneumonia.
This was breast cancer in theleft breast.
I'm very aware I might havetrouble catching my breath for a
minute, but I never feel harmedor like I'm not gonna be able
to breathe.
It's just enough that I'm ableto express it to you.
Again, like I said too, I mightbe getting a pain somewhere.

(23:01):
It's not an actual pain like,oh gosh, I can't walk.
It's more like my attention isbeing drawn to a certain part of
my body.
That said, I've had twoinstances where my feelings were
so strong I almost could not godo the readings.
I was on my way to a groupreading one time.

(23:25):
Well, actually, let me back upand start with this one.
One time, my family and I, wewere out to lunch, and I had a
group reading that evening.
So we were going to have lunch,go home, and just kind of
prepare and relax a little bitand do my meditations and get
ready.
But in the restaurant, All of asudden, I had the most
overwhelming sense that I had togo to sleep right now.

(23:47):
It was so bad that my familywanted to order dessert.
And I'm like, I got to go tothe car.
You all have dessert, but Ihave to go to the car.
There was nothing that couldhave kept me in that restaurant
and kept me awake.
My body was shutting down.
I had to go lay down.
So I got in the car and I wasinstantly snoring.
So my family comes to the carwith her to go, milkshakes, and

(24:10):
we're getting in, and we'redriving home.
I slept the entire way home.
We walked in the house, and I'ma big no shoes in the house
person.
Kind of grosses me out.
Definitely no shoes on thecouch.
I walked straight to the couchwith my boots on and went to
sleep.
I have little kids.
They're loud.
I have dogs.

(24:31):
I don't know how I did this,but it was freaking me out
because I'm like, how am I goingto do this reading tonight?
Like, I'm so tired.
Snoring on the couch, asleep.
One of my daughters wakes meup.
She's like, mom, it's almosttime for you to leave for your
reading.
So I get myself up.
I'm like, okay.
Brush my teeth, get myselfcleaned up.
And I look at my husband.

(24:53):
I'm like, I don't know if I cando this tonight.
And he's like, it's yourclient.
I'm like, oh my God, it is.
And then I felt better enoughto drive there.
But the minute I got into thehouse...
I said, before we get started,before my spiel, before
everything, who's got theproblem with fatigue?
Because you almost made me notcome tonight.

(25:14):
And it was a woman in thefamily who didn't want anyone to
know that she was ill.
And it ended up being sobeautiful because her family was
there to support her.
So does it hurt?
No.
But sometimes it's insane.
There was one other time onanother group reading, on my way
driving, I had to pull over ina parking lot because I was

(25:39):
having a panic attack.
My anxiety was so high, I wasshaking.
And I pulled over.
I tried to drink water.
I tried all my breathingexercises.
I called my husband.
I'm like, I don't think I cando this.
You need to know where I ambecause if this panic attack
gets so bad I can't drive, Ineed you to come get me.

(25:59):
And again, the voice of reason,it's for your reading tonight.
I'm like, oh, okay.
So same exact thing.
I walk in the house.
It's a group of sisters thatonce a year they get together
from all over the country.
They rent an Airbnb and thenthey do some form of
entertainment or bondingexperience, and I was the
entertainment.

(26:19):
But I had to walk in and say,before we get started, who's got
the overwhelming anxiety?
So that's how it feels.
But also, I didn't realize thisuntil I saw a recording of
myself doing readings.
I tend to get the informationthrough all of my senses.

(26:41):
So some people, you know...
Clairvoyant, some clairaudient.
I tend to have most of them.
The one I have the most of isfeeling, clairsentient.
They don't have to have thefancy names.
They just feel stuff.
But I do, after watching thatvideo, I did notice that I
deliver my information by sayingthings like, oh, they're

(27:01):
telling me this.
Or she's showing me this.
Or I'm feeling this.
I was using all my sense words.
Or I'm smelling this.
I often will do a mannerismthat isn't mine.
So I was in Lilydale, New Yorkfor a seminar and I was doing a
reading for a lady.
I was sitting there like thistalking to her about Aunt Carol

(27:24):
for like 30 minutes.
And I'm just like, Aunt Caroldid this and Aunt Carol did
that.
And she's like, yep, yep,that's Aunt Carol.
And all of a sudden I'm like,Aunt Carol is a chain smoker.
And she's like, oh my gosh, shewas never without a cigarette.
I've never smoked a cigarettein my life.
But there I was holding thatcigarette.
So I also work at a spa inPhoenix every now and then.

(27:44):
I'm just their on-callesthetician.
And one of the otherestheticians, she desperately
wanted me to do a reading.
And I try not to do them likethat because it just kind of
cheapens the experience.
But I was getting a messagefrom her mom.
And I was doing this.
I was just rubbing my faceweirdly.
And I'm an esthetician, so Idon't touch my face.
Like, don't touch your face.

(28:06):
You get yuckies.
But there I was touching myface.
And I'm delivering this messageto Louise.
And I'm like, why is your mommaking me touch my face?
And she said, my mom had PCOS.
So if any of you women knowwhat that is, polycystic ovarian
syndrome, it's a problem withthe ovaries where you tend to

(28:26):
grow facial hair.
Her mom had a ton of facialhair that really, really
disturbed her, understandably.
She was validating.
I have no idea why I wasrubbing my face, but Louise did.
So what does it feel like?
It feels like all kinds ofthings.
But it's not scary.

(28:46):
It's just interesting.
But the minute I recognize, itgoes away.
So I no longer have to feel it.
So I don't have to sit therefor a long time feeling the COPD
or feeling the pain.
It subsides the minute I say,did your person have this?
And if you say yes, I'm like,OK, thank you for letting me.

(29:07):
Breathe again.
OK.
This one is one of my favoritesto talk about.
A spirit just hid his face inother signs.
So there are some great booksout there about signs from the
universe, signs from spirit.
We've all heard about penniesand dimes and butterflies and
dragonflies and all thesethings.
And they're all possible.

(29:28):
Your spirit person will sendwhatever signs mean something to
you.
And don't let anybodyinvalidate that for you.
And it might be very differentthan mine or your neighbor's.
That's totally fine.
But signs and symbols are veryspecific to the medium.
Also, we have our own.
Let me give you an example.

(29:48):
Say I'm sitting down with youand I see a red apple.
Now to one medium, that mightmean New York.
To another medium, that mightmean their spirit person was a
teacher.
So each person has to learnwhat their signs and symbols are
for them.
So I use this example becauseit was one of the most profound

(30:12):
for me when I finally figuredout what it was.
I was doing a reading really,really in the beginning when I
was first putting myself outthere.
And it was over the internet.
Yeah, it was over the internet.
I don't even know where thelady was.
I don't remember much about it.
But I do remember I had hergrandfather there.

(30:33):
He was a Hispanic man, nicelooking.
He loved to dance because hewas showing me dancing.
And he was showing me that hehad a wife who was still alive.
But he was showing me all thesethings.
And it was great.
And I was validating all of itwith my client.
And then all of a sudden, heturned away from me.

(30:54):
He just showed me his back.
And then I heard anotherfamily.
And I was like, what the heckis this?
What does this mean?
Why did he turn away from me?
And what is he saying?
And that's another thing aboutdoing the kind of work that I
do.
How do you deliver a messagethat might be yucky?
How am I going to say to thisgranddaughter, did your grandpa

(31:18):
have another family?
Because awkward.
But I also have to deliver whatSpirit's telling me.
So anyway, lo and behold, hedid.
He had a complete other familyin town.
And so my client's mom, whenher and her sisters were young,
would go to school, and there'dbe other kids that would say,

(31:40):
why was your dad at my houselast night?
So I started to wonder at thatpoint, because this is the first
time that happened to me, washe hiding his face because he
was ashamed?
So I just made a little note.
in my book.
Few years later, I'm sure therewere more in the middle, but
these are the ones that standout the most that are the most
impressive.
I was invited to come read fora family in Tucson.

(32:03):
And the spirit that was comingthrough was for the husband that
I was there with.
And his wife was there takingnotes.
And my husband was there takingnotes because he used to be a
skeptic.
And I'm getting my client'sbrother.
So I'm describing him.
He's tall.

(32:24):
He's handsome.
He's got a beard and amustache.
He's standing in a lush greenyard.
The fence is about this high.
There's a little girl on aswing next to him.
She's still alive.
Everything, he's like, yep,yep, yep.
That's my brother.
That's my brother.
And then all of a sudden, heturns away.
And now I've remembered back tothe other family guy.

(32:46):
And I said, why'd your brotherjust turn away from me?
What's he ashamed of?
What did he do?
And he said, he stole my wife.
His twin brother took his wifeand was still married to her
till he died.
So that's something to beashamed of.
So this is now I understand100% that when a spirit turns

(33:11):
away from me, they're telling methey're sorry.
They feel guilty.
They want forgiveness.
Sometimes they don't.
Sometimes they're just like,yeah, I did this thing.
But that's what that means.
So signs and symbols can beanything.
And one of the most excitingexperiences I've had with signs

(33:32):
and symbols I was doing anotherphone reading for a lady in Oro
Valley.
We met at a restaurant, and wewere sitting at the community
table.
And it's funny how energy justdraws people together, because
I'll talk to anybody.
But this lady, I just wanted totalk to her.
And she wanted to talk to me.
And I was like, that's dandy,because my husband was on his
phone.
So we start talking.

(33:53):
We hit it off.
She finds out what I do.
We exchange numbers, and we goour separate ways.
Finally, one day, she calls me,though, and she wants a
reading.
So we set it up.
We're on the phone.
And man, all this fantasticinformation comes through.
Sometimes there's readings thatare like pulling teeth.
I'm like, oh my God, pleasetalk to me.
And other times I'm like, slowdown, slow down.

(34:13):
I can't say it that fast.
This was one of those so fast.
He was showing me hismotorcycle, his Hawaiian shirts,
how 500 people showed up to hisfuneral all wearing Hawaiian
shirts.
Like it was the most impressiveI've ever had a spirit talk to
me.
And even with all of this, andall of this other conversation I

(34:34):
had with his wife about all thegreat things they did, that he
showed me them camping, and theyeven have those camping chairs
that are actually attached.
They'd have their drinks,they'd watch the sunset, and
they're camping by their camper.
Like, it was everything.
She's like, but I don't know ifhe's around me.
I don't think he sends mesigns.
And I knew right then, becausehe's telling me, I send her

(34:54):
signs all the time.
She just doesn't see them.
She's being stubborn.
So I said to him, Send me asign.
Tell me what her sign is.
And right then, I said, okay,yellow bird.
I said, here's what I'm goingto show you.
I'm seeing a big sliding glassdoor.
And outside, I'm seeing it asif you're inside the house

(35:17):
looking out the glass door, andthere is pottery with a cactus.
And on that cactus is a yellowbird.
That is his sign.
He's with you all the time onthis cactus in your backyard.
She gasped.
She said, I'm sitting in frontof the sliding glass door right

(35:38):
now, and a yellow bird justlanded on the cactus.
And I was like, send me apicture, because no one's going
to believe this story.
No one's going to believe thisstory.
Real time, her husband sentthat yellow bird.
I got goosebumps on my cheeks.
Don't touch your face.
Real time he sent that.
So the thing about signs andsymbols is sometimes we're still

(36:00):
grieving and we can't see them.
Sometimes we rationalize themaway because we don't want to
believe we're scared.
It doesn't mean they're notsending them.
It means we need to look forthem.
I also say, ask for them.
Tell your loved one, I'mstruggling.
I need to hear from you.

(36:21):
I want to see a purple elephantin the next three days.
And no joke, you'll be at astore and there'll be a card on
the rack with a purple elephantbecause your person is
listening.
You often aren't.
So signs and symbols are a bigthing.
And it could be the funniestthing.
It doesn't have to make senseto anybody but you and your

(36:44):
person.
Your grandma's giving me theside eye.
I do not know how many timesI've been in a reading.
So I have a home office, andthen I have an office that I
share with a woman who came andspoke to you recently, Michelle.
And I'll be sitting there, andI'll get comfortable.
I'll have my coffee, light somecandles, and I'll be reading

(37:08):
for somebody.
And it'll be grandma.
And all of a sudden, I'msitting up.
And one time, I even buttonedmy shirt.
A little more.
And then it started dawning onme, kind of like the man who
turned away.
Grandma has manners and shewants me to sit up straight.
She says I'm showing too muchand I got a butt in my shirt.

(37:28):
So I will say to my guest, myclient, your grandma was proper,
wasn't she?
And she's like, oh yeah, we hadto sit up straight.
We had to dress well.
I said, your grandma is dressedpristinely.
There is not a wrinkle.
Everything's perfect.
So it's funny.
Sometimes they will comethrough so much with the same

(37:51):
personality that that's thevalidation.
And they will make me do thingslike that that, again, I won't
even realize I'm doing it for aminute.
And all of a sudden, I'm like,oh, this isn't me.
She's making me sit upstraight.
She's making me do this orthat.
They've...
spirit has made me do somefunny, interesting things like
that.
So they can still have someimpact on us from the other

(38:16):
side.
So some spirits are chatty,others ghost me.
Ha ha, that was just a littlejoke.
So I noticed early on, as Imentioned before, sometimes
spirits will give me so muchinformation I cannot say it fast
enough, and I have to slow themdown or scribble some so I
don't forget.
Others, I'm like, oh my god,these people spent money on me,

(38:39):
and you're not showing up?
Start talking.
And what I have learned arethere are reasons why some
people are quiet on the otherside.
Sometimes they were quiet inlife, and they just didn't want
to be the center of attention.
And that just carried over ontothe other side.

(39:01):
And they're not chatty.
They're more reserved people.
They're not the front of theline people.
And they're just quieter.
And it's a little harder to getinformation from them.
And I kind of have to do it adifferent way.
I have to ask them, OK, show mesomething.
If you don't want to talk tome, show me something or make me
feel something.
I need your person to know thatyou're here and that you're OK.

(39:22):
Other reasons why they don'ttalk to me, I've realized, is
religion.
And I said we weren't going totalk religion, and we aren't.
But I have found some people,especially older generations, if
they were very religious andthis kind of stuff would have
made them uncomfortable, theywon't talk to me.
And so I will have to ask myclient, was your grandmother

(39:47):
very, very into her church?
Oh yes, her faith waseverything to her.
Okay, that could explain whyshe's not wanting to talk to me.
And then I can usually workwith spirit.
I can usually tell them,because this is true, I only
work in the light.
Whatever everybody else wantsto call it or say about it, I
say a prayer before I doreadings.

(40:09):
I do believe in God.
I work in the light andgenerally spirit will work with
me.
But that happens sometimes.
And once we, kind of like thepains in my body, once we tackle
why they're being quiet,they'll generally start to talk
to me.
So religious upbringing, orsome people are just scared.

(40:31):
If the person in spirit thinksthis is dangerous or that I'm
doing something that's not okay,Sometimes they're the quieter
ones, more often than not.
But we can usually work throughit.
Other times it's funny.
I'll be connected with somebodyand I'll be like, your person

(40:51):
thinks it's hilarious thatyou're talking to me.
And they're like, yep, thatmakes sense.
They think this is ridiculousand that you don't need this or
this is foofy.
Yep, that's true.
I'm like, well, here we are.
Let me tell you about yourperson.
So that's just kind of a funnything to talk about is our
personalities change.
do carry over, but I wanna makea side note to that.

(41:14):
I believe, and from experience,two things.
Have a drink of water realquick.
One, I believe that when wecross over, we do have the

(41:36):
ability to do good things.
Even if we didn't do thegreatest of things here on
Earth, I don't think it's theend of the line for us.
I think we can redeem ourselvesby doing certain things on the
other side.
The flip side of that coin isjust because you die doesn't
make you all-knowing and awesomeat everything.
So if Aunt Susie gave youterrible advice in life, she

(41:59):
might still give you terribleadvice in death.
We still have free will, andwe've got to kind of pay
attention to that.
And that leads me to that one.
Are we all knowing when we die?
No.
Yes and no.
Sure, they can see things.
Your mom might come to me andtell me, you're struggling with
your left foot right now, andyou have a photo on your mantle

(42:21):
of you and your dog at a park.
So they can show us that theyknow what's going on in our
lives.
But do they know everythingabout how the world works?
I don't know.
Do they give good advice?
I don't know, sometimes.
OK, next one, because look, I'mtalking too much.

(42:42):
I'm going too slow.
Do I use tools in my readings?
So tools, I mean like tarotcards.
Yes, I decorated my whole thingwith tarot cards, because it's
really hard to find spiritualtemplates.
Tarot cards, Ouija boards,things like that.
A lot of mixed feelings onthat.
So when I first got started inthis kind of work, I was

(43:05):
terrified.
I was like, nope.
Somebody told me I was amedium.
It was too scary.
I didn't want to do it.
She introduced me to some angelcards.
I was scared of tarot cards.
But I started with angel cards.
And I kind of went down thispath.
And then fast forward a fewyears later, I'm like the tarot
card reader for the city ofTucson.

(43:25):
I'm at everybody's partyreading tarot cards.
I got really good at it, lovedit, taught classes and
everything.
So I had a tool that I used toget information and share it.
2019, November, I'll neverforget.
I was doing an event, and I wasreading tarot for people
throughout the day.
At the end of the day, I justintuitively knew I was never

(43:46):
going to read tarot again.
I have 47,000 decks of cards.
I look at them.
They're beautiful.
They're on my shelves in myliving room.
I don't read tarot.
I don't even remember.
When I pull out a deck, I'mlike, I couldn't read for you
right now if I tried.
I don't need them anymore.
I don't like to use the wordgift.
We might have time to get intothat.

(44:06):
Whatever it is that I have thatI use changed.
And I no longer need the cards.
And what I realized one day isI was doing Reiki for somebody.
It was during COVID.
And during that Reiki session,I started seeing things about
this person.

(44:26):
I wasn't using cards, but I wasseeing things.
And after the appointment, wesat down and talked about it.
And I was like, can I tell yousome things I saw?
Usually people are asking me,what'd you see?
So I laid it out there andrealized I didn't use tools.
I didn't need them.
And a funny one here realquick.

(44:48):
Another Reiki client at thatsame time.
So I used to have thisbeautiful little Reiki room, all
decorated the way I wanted it,the colors I like, my own space.
Have this lady on the tablethat I saw all the time, like
weekly.
And I'm in there, I've been inthis room a thousand times,
right?
All of a sudden, I open my eyesand I'm looking around because

(45:09):
I smell pine trees, likeChristmas trees.
And I'm looking around my roomlike there's gonna be a pine
tree.
Okay, but I'm smelling pinetrees as if I'm in a pine
forest.
So I continue the Reikisession, finish, we go out into
the waiting room, we talk, andshe asks me if I got anything,
and I'm like, this is superweird.
But I don't know if you'resupposed to go up to the

(45:30):
mountains this weekend, or youwere, or you have plans, but I
was really smelling pine trees.
I'm like, to the point where Ilooked around my own room, like
there's going to be a pine tree.
And she's like, hmm, that'sinteresting.
OK.
And she leaves.
And I think it was like aFriday night, because my family
and I went to the movies thatnight.
And I remember I'm sittingthere in the movies.
I got my feet up on the seat infront of me, hoping nobody's
going to come in.

(45:51):
And my phone dings.
And the movie wasn't on yet, soI'm like, oh, look at my phone.
It was a message from my clientfrom that day.
She got home from herappointment.
Her husband had gone shoppingfor dinner stuff and was making
dinner.
But while he was at TraderJoe's, he bought a balsam pine
candle, and it was burning onthe counter.

(46:12):
Holy crap.
I was like, oh, my gosh.
Thankfully, I have this inwriting, because nobody would
believe that.
That's when I realized reallyover and over these things kept
happening and I knew intuitivelyI wasn't supposed to use the
cards anymore and spirit wasshowing me I didn't need the
cards.
I'll touch on Ouija boards.

(46:33):
I don't mess with them.
I don't think we can openportals to hell.
We'll get to that.
I really don't because I thinkyou have to believe in that
stuff for it to happen and Ichoose not to believe.
But my husband's Hispanic.
He's like, don't be conjuringthings.
I'm like, I don't know how toconjure.
I'm like not that powerful.

(46:54):
So here's what's interestingabout Ouija boards.
In England, at the ArthurFinley College, they call them
like spirit boards or messageboards.
And they're not afraid of them.
My mentors use them all thetime as a means to communicate.
I believe 100% it's ourintention.
Do we want any tool in thehands of the wrong people?

(47:16):
No.
Do I think I could safely use aOuija board?
Sure.
But I also studyparapsychology.
I also know that we emit justenough little frequencies that
we cannot really verify thatwe're not pushing that thing
around.
My take on it.
Maybe I'll try it someday.

(47:38):
I don't know.
I think I did when I was like10 with my neighbor.
But we didn't know what we weredoing.
And of course, one of us waspushing it.
OK, so tools.
I think tools can have value,and I'm not dismissing tools.
I loved being a tarot reader.
I found so much joy and comfortwith my cards.
I love my angel cards.

(47:58):
I have color cards.
I still have them around.
It's just that my work changed,and I don't use them anymore.
I'm not saying that peopleshouldn't.
Okay, ethics and responsibilityin mediumship and psychic work.
I talked about this.
So when you watch TV, whowatches Teresa Caputo?
Freaking love her.

(48:19):
Been to two of her shows.
She's just so fun to be around.
But you have to understand thatas much as that looks
spontaneous, those people havealready signed waivers and
they've already been mic'd up.
So they do know a little bitabout what's going on.
Ethically, I will never walk upto a person in public or at a

(48:40):
restaurant or a grocery storeand be like, your mom is here.
Who am I to do that?
I don't know how that's goingto be received.
What if that's going to destroyyou and you're going to get a
car accident on the way homebecause I just upset you so
badly?
What if it's scary?
What if that's not in yourbelief system?
It's none of my business.
And that is when I tell Spirit,find another way to get that

(49:02):
person to me legitimately andthen I will deliver your
message.
That said, there are people inmy life who know what I do.
I was getting my hair done afew years back.
And she was like, okay, I'mgoing to go mix up the color.
And I got a spirit right here.
And she wants to talk.

(49:23):
And I'm like, no, no, I'm notgoing to do that to her.
I'm not going to bother her.
It's tacky.
She's working.
No.
But this woman is like, no, yougot to talk to her.
You got to talk to her.
I got to talk to her.
I got to talk to her.
And she just won't leave.
And I know I said boundaries,but this is one of those times
where I'm like, okay, I know myhairstylist.
And I'm going to just see howthis plays out.

(49:44):
But I'm telling the spirit,nope, nope, nope, nope, nope.
Then my hairstylist comes backand I'm like, oh my gosh, do you
have an aunt on your mother'sside in spirit?
Because it gets to be where Ican't hold it in.
There are times where it'slike, bleh, I gotta let it out.
But I believe that spirit knowswhen I'm not gonna.
So they push me when they knowI can.

(50:05):
And so it ended up being agreat thing.
She actually, the spirit washere for my hairstylist mom.
I delivered enough informationthat she gave it to her mom and
then she brought her mom to myhouse for a reading.
And it was brilliant.
It was so healing andwonderful.
But ethics and responsibility.
I also keep my readingsconfidential.

(50:27):
I don't share them.
I might share stories where Idon't use names or examples of
things that have happened, but Idon't be like, oh, guess what?
I saw Mary yesterday and oh myGod, her dad.
I don't do that.
But my biggest one is theethics of I just don't approach
people.
I don't think it's appropriate.
And I hear people a lot say, Iwas at the grocery store and

(50:48):
this lady came up to me and shetold me that my grandpa's like
hovering around me or that Ihave an attachment.
Don't get me started on that,sorry.
I shouldn't have said it likethat.
But I just don't do that.
So I don't think that that'ssomething we should do.
Okay, and I'm speeding up alittle because I feel bad we're
taking so much time.
Why validation is important.

(51:10):
So if I said to you, yourhusband is here and he loves you
so much and he's just reallyproud of all that you're doing
and he knows that you're tiredand blah, blah, blah.
While that validation is abeautiful message.
If I haven't established thatI'm talking to your husband, it
has less meaning, right?

(51:30):
But if I have given youinformation, your husband used
to do this kind of work.
He used to dress like this.
He really cared about hisshoes.
He never brushed his hair, andit was a topic of conversation.
If I've given you all thisstuff, you're like, that is so
my husband.
Remember the 500 people at thefuneral in the Hawaiian shirts?
Now if I tell you he loves you,that's Maybe enough, because I

(51:55):
validated that I'm talking tohim, and if his message is
simply, I just need you to knowI still love you.
That's okay.
So validation is exceptionallyimportant to me in my work.
Grief, healing, and closure.
I told you at the beginning, Iwill stop doing this work when I
stop being amazed.
I am not bragging in any waywhen I say this.

(52:20):
I'm merely just repeating astory.
So I hear a lot of times thatpeople are so grateful after a
reading, you know, that theinformation they get really does
help them heal.
And I'm so grateful I canprovide that for them.
I don't take full credit.
Yes, I do work on myself.
Yes, I do pay attention andlisten.
Yes, I've learned how todeliver these messages.

(52:41):
But I know it's not just me.
There's so much more at playthat I don't take all the
credit.
But I also mentioned I'm not aparty trick.
This is real work for me, and Ivalue it very much.
I only deliver messages thatare helpful, hopeful, and
healing.
I want to help people heal.

(53:02):
I want to give people hope, andI want to be helpful to them.
It's not for fun, and don'ttake it lightly.
I had a wife come to me for areading, and then afterwards,
she said, I got to bring myhusband to you.
He's a mess.
And so she brought him to me.
And within minutes, I'mconnected with his father.
And my client is just sobbingat the table.

(53:22):
I'm telling him all thesethings.
You know, you did this sportand that sport.
And he'd love to take you tothis.
And he'd like to do that.
And you guys did this.
And he's sobbing because he'slike, I've always felt like a
failure.
Like my dad just didn't noticeme, didn't care about me.
Yet I didn't know that.
So I'm delivering everythingfrom his father.
And he realizes that hisperception is of how his father

(53:44):
felt about him was not correct.
His father was very proud ofhim.
And then his father deliveredthe best validation ever.
I'm sitting there and I'm like,why am I seeing rows and rows
of pristine tennis shoes?
Just rows of these pristinetennis shoes.
And his wife slaps the tableand starts cracking up.

(54:07):
This man...
collects tennis shoes.
And that's his passion.
And she said he has more shoesthan she has clothes.
And he would clean them.
They were perfect andeverything.
So his dad was validating,showing, I know what you're
doing.
I see your shoes.
This is like the ribbon sealingit all up that I love you and

(54:30):
I'm proud of you.
And at the end of that reading,he literally said, I've been in
therapy for 20 years.
And I haven't felt as good as Ifeel today.
And I'm like, oh my God.
Okay, well, your dad.
Okay.
How to be prepared for areading.
We already touched on that.
If you choose to have a readingwith somebody, go with an open
heart and an open mind.

(54:50):
I also say this.
Don't feed them information.
I tell people, I only want yourfirst name and your phone
number so I can call you.
I don't want you to write me adissertation in your email.
If I get an email like that onmy website, I have my husband
screen it.
Like, tell me what I need toknow.
They want psychic ormediumship.
And then write down their phonenumber for me because I don't

(55:12):
want to read the email.
Yes, we need interaction.
That's the difference, though.
I can't have someone like this.
They try.
Spirit's pretty strong andpersuasive.
Generally, my skeptics end upbeing my best ones.
But you do have to interact.
So I say this.
Do not feed me information, butI do need you to answer me if I

(55:37):
say, your husband, blah, blah,blah, blah, blah.
And if you say, yes, that makessense to me.
Or no, that doesn't really makesense to me.
A no is OK.
Maybe I'm delivering it wrong.
Spirit doesn't make mistakes.
I do.
But that back and forth keepsthe energy up so I can keep
connected to spirit and I cankeep connected to you.
So it's OK to validate theinformation or say no or maybe

(56:00):
or I'm not sure.
But you have to talk back toyour person.
But you don't have to supply abunch of information.
So being prepared, I also, Ishowed up for a group reading
one time.
This I will never do again.
I have so many rules now.
This woman and her husbandwanted me to come to their
house.
And they wanted all their kidsand kids' spouses and everybody

(56:21):
there.
And they have this living roomwith this big giant couch.
And everybody's sitting there.
And then they put one chairthere.
Right here for me.
But behind me was a TV onbigger than this.
Muted, but on.
And I'm like, okay.
So I'm trying to connect withtheir dead people, but I can

(56:44):
feel they're just watching TV.
So I have rules.
You know, you got to be in aquiet place where you can
listen.
Please don't be driving.
I have people tell me, oh, I'mgoing to take your call on the
way home from work.
I'm like, no, I don't have timefor that.
If you want to hear for yourpeople, let's have some respect
for them and me and yourself andthe people you're driving
around.
So be in a quiet place whereyou can focus, go to the

(57:05):
bathroom, have a nice drink,have a notepad with you.
Be prepared.
My mentor in England, shealways says, show up for a
reading like you're going tohave tea with your granny.
She's like, put on yourlipstick.
I'm like, OK, I don't wearlipstick, but I'll do other
things.
OK.
How much time do I have, Deb?
OK.

(57:25):
Do you need to protect yourenergy?
I don't believe so.
I've had people tell me, putobsidian in your bra.
Well, I did that once.
And when I forgot and took mybra off, it broke on the
bathroom floor.
So I don't do that.
I believe we are all protectedalready.
I don't think I need to ask forprotection because I'm also not

(57:46):
doing anything that I think Ineed protecting from.
And I know that's acontroversial way to look at
things and that's okay.
I'm not here to convince you.
My personal opinion is Ibelieve I'm protected at all
times.
I believe we all are.
And so I don't need to protectmy energy.
I also don't put myself inpositions where I feel like I

(58:06):
need to.
My opinion.
Okay, how often can you get areading?
This is one reason I got out ofdoing Tarot.
People become too dependent ontheir readers.
And I would have a fantasticreading with a client.
I would give them answers totheir questions and it would be
beautiful.
And they'd come back next weekand ask the same question.

(58:28):
They don't want personalresponsibility.
I'm really big on personalresponsibility.
I can give you all theinformation under the sun, but
what you do with it is whatmatters.
So if people become dependenton their reader, they're taking
away from their own personalresponsibility and trusting in
their own instincts.
When I do mediumship, I won'tdo it more than six months

(58:51):
apart.
I have a lady in Florida.
She's 82 years old.
Every six months, she gets areading.
She wants to hear from her sonand her best friends from the
nursing home.
And we just do that.
Her granddaughter gets herthose as Christmas presents and
trades me a massage.
Psychic readings, I would saythe same.
I just think that people needto take time to digest the

(59:14):
information, do something withit, put practices in place in
their lives, and not rely onsomeone else to make their
decisions for them.
So I'm really big on that.
I do set limits.
I don't need your money thatbad.
I want you to be healthy.
Does that make sense?
I don't bend on that one.

(59:34):
Okay, here we go.
Popular myths.
I'll talk a little quicker.
Mediums can only guess or usecold reading techniques.
Sure, most of them do.
Am I guilty of sometimes seeingthe look on your face and then
I know?
And I'm like, oh, no, that wasthis or that.
So sure, I would say more oftenthan not, most of us are

(59:59):
shysters.
I, for a very long time, wouldnot use the words psychic
mediums.
Spiritual advisor.
This or that.
Because there's a connotationwith it.
It just is.
And then one day I decided totell the universe I own it.
And I put it on my licenseplate.
Medium.
And I thought the people whoneed me will know.

(01:00:21):
The others will think it's justsomething funny.
And it's true.
So When I first startedactually doing readings, I used
to think, I remembered back tobeing a kid in the 80s at my
grandma's house, and there'd bethose commercials on TV that you
could call into the psychichotline.
And I remember thinking, wow,that's really cool, but how can
they tell you anything aboutyourself over the phone?

(01:00:42):
That's weird.
And so I always thought thatwas a sham.
And so then when I took myfirst mentorship as a medium,
I'm very skeptical.
And she said, okay, yourhomework is...
You're going to do a phonereading with who I pair you up
with.
And I was like, oh, I can't doa phone reading.
That's weird.
I need to be by the person.
I need to see them.
Well, let me tell you, thatexperience was the best one ever

(01:01:06):
because now I love phonereadings.
You know why?
I can't see you.
I can't read you physically.
I can't see your face.
I can't see whether you lookhappy or sad at what I said.
I can't see you go, pah, or,oh.
You know, so I feel that I cangive you a really good reading
over the phone.
I don't do video anymore.
I'm either in person or phonebecause I don't want to be

(01:01:31):
accused of that.
And studying parapsychology,there's a lot of blind studies
they've done, really, reallyin-depth things.
And we do a lot of it here inTucson.
It's pretty fascinating.
to eliminate this as much aspossible and they have had
success.
So I know that we can do this.
I just, that we can do thesereadings and it be real.

(01:01:54):
But I try to leave out as manychances of being accused of cold
reading as possible.
Okay, talking to spirits canopen portals.
I don't believe it.
A lot of people do, and that'sOK.
Maybe it's a protectionmechanism in myself.
I'm not being snarky or snottyabout it.
It's just maybe I choose tobelieve it so that I don't

(01:02:15):
conjure, as my husband wouldsay.
I know that my readings, again,helpful, hopeful, and healing.
That's my intention.
I set that intention.
I believe that intention.
And I only work with thatintention.
So I'm not opening anything.
Plus, I don't think I'm thatpowerful.
OK, only certain people areborn with a gift.
I said we would touch on this.

(01:02:36):
I believe that's crap.
And anybody who says that, I'dwalk the other way, and I
wouldn't give them a dime.
I'm no more special than any ofyou, 100%.
Any one of you can talk to yourloved ones.
You don't need me.
You don't need someone like me.
You need the openness andwillingness.
I believe some of us are scaredout of our intuition when we're

(01:02:58):
kids.
And I believe some of usrationalize it away.
But I think every single personis born psychic.
I think it is our internalcompass.
It's what tells you, don't godown that dark alley at night.
It's what tells you, oh, Ishouldn't be dating this person.
Or whatever it is, I don'tthink I should take that job.
You're born with it.

(01:03:18):
It doesn't go away.
We stuff it down.
Some of us just bring it backup and develop it more than
others.
But anybody who says they havethis gift, I never say I have a
gift.
and that you don't, I would runaway from them.
Spirits are trapped and need tobe sent to the light.

(01:03:39):
I don't think I'm thatpowerful.
I also don't think God makesmistakes, or whoever puts us
here, I don't think they makemistake.
I don't think we have that needor that right.
You'll hear, if you listen tothat episode about when I found
out about my mediumship, thatthe medium that came to help me,

(01:04:00):
when I didn't believe inmediums, she said that she was
helping somebody in mydaughter's room go to the light.
And I remember thinking, that'sinteresting.
OK, I don't know what to dowith that.
But the more training I had andthe more time I spent in
England, because they're superbig on mediumship in the UK,

(01:04:23):
that's when I was told Goddoesn't make mistakes, and it
just made sense to me, and whoam I to be the one to help you
along the way?
That's just my take on it.
Okay, and we already talkedabout that one.
Mediumship can't be done overthe phone or the internet.
Again, I think some of my bestreadings are done over the

(01:04:44):
phone.
Oh, okay.
So, in a nutshell, In 2015, Iwas living in Spokane,
Washington.
My son was in high school.
My daughter was inkindergarten.

(01:05:04):
Told you there's this giantgap.
And we had been actually livingin Idaho, right across the
border.
So Idaho and Washington,everybody commutes between the
two.
And it was time to move out ofour rental house in Idaho.
And we found this house onCraigslist in Washington.

(01:05:25):
And like I said, my husbandbeing Hispanic, not a lot of
people looked like my kids inIdaho.
So we thought maybe we'll moveto Spokane and there'd be a
little bit more.
And so we show up at this houseto meet the owner.
And he opens the door.
And I looked at my husband.
I said, we have to live here.

(01:05:45):
I don't know why we have tolive here.
I hadn't even stepped in thedoor.
We're supposed to live here.
So we did the walkthrough, wedid the paperwork, everything,
and we moved in.
And everything went to crap.
Everything.
My marriage was terrible.
My kindergartner would notsleep.
She would just wander the houseat like four in the morning.

(01:06:06):
Just icky, bad stuff wouldhappen in this house.
Later, If you listen to anotherepisode with Professor Lloyd
Auerbach, parapsychologist,somehow we might have been
causing all of that.
But whatever.
It got me where I am today.
So all this bad stuff washappening.

(01:06:28):
Life was pretty rough.
My husband lost a job.
We had no money.
It was just, it could not havebeen a harder time in our lives.
And then my husband had to, andreally this is so paraphrased
because of timing, my husbandhad to take a job in California.
And I had to stay with, we hadfour kids at the time, I had to
stay so he could graduate highschool and my daughter could

(01:06:49):
finish kindergarten.
And then we had two babies.
And so there I was alone inthis house.
We had no family, nobody up inthe Pacific Northwest.
We had gone there for his job.
And now I'm alone.
One day, my car won't start,and I got to go pick up all my
kids.
It was super weird.
I had driven my car that day.

(01:07:09):
Everything was fine.
I went to the car wash.
I got the oil changed, backedmy car in, put the babies down
for a nap.
I'll remember this day till theday I die.
But my car wouldn't start.
And then it dawned on me, inall the time we had lived there,
no neighbors had ever come andtalked to us.
But I had to go meet myneighbor, because I knew she had

(01:07:29):
a minivan, and I had a bunch ofkids.
So I go knock on her door andI'm like, hi, I'm your neighbor.
My car won't start.
I have no help and I got topick up my kids and you have a
minivan.
And she's like, okay, I'll beright over.
So we load up the kids in thecar.
I'm moving car seats.
Glad those days are over.
And we don't get but a few feetdown the road when she looks at

(01:07:53):
me and she's like, how are youliving in that house?
How are you living in thathouse?
And I'm like, stop.
Whatever you have to say, Idon't want to hear it.
And then I'm like, what?
So then she tells me, I'mliving in a murder-suicide
house.
And that's why she has foil inher windows, because of the evil

(01:08:18):
coming out of my house.
I've got two babies in the backseat, and no family, no
husband, nobody with me.
And I'm like, I don't even knowwhat to do with this
information right now.
I know I'm late picking up mykids.
It was really actually, I'mmaking light, but it was
traumatizing.
I text my husband.
He calls me.
He's like, get on a plane.
I'm like, okay, now I'm evenmore scared.
I'm like, well, Sam has tograduate, and Ruby has

(01:08:41):
kindergarten, and I don't knowwhat to do when I've got babies.
So anyway, cliffhanger.
No, if you want to listen tothe episodes, you'll get all the
details.
And I don't earn any money.
It's that tiny of a podcast.
I'm not trying to sell youanything.
It's just we don't have timefor the story.
Come to find out, there hadbeen a man and his girlfriend.

(01:09:04):
He owned the house.
She lived in the house, too,with her two boys.
One was autistic.
They were twins.
Apparently, the autistic boycaused a lot of problems in
their relationship.
And things got bad.
She moved out.
He decided to go kill her andone of the boys.

(01:09:29):
And then he came home andkilled himself in my house.
The owner did not tell us anyof this.
My daughter, who's now 13, wasthe child who slept in the boys'
room.
And so that made sense aftereverything we put together.
It made sense with things wesaw on the video monitor.
We have pictures from our videomonitor.
My son will corroborate, like,baby monitor would be pointed at

(01:09:53):
the ceiling.
Weird things would happen.
So I had to live there a fewmore months, terrified.
I didn't know what to do withthis information.
Got a hold of a friend of afriend of a friend who said she
was a medium.
Remember, I didn't believe inmediums, but I was like, he went
to a Catholic high school.
I called them.
I'm like, on TV, you peoplehelp.

(01:10:13):
So can you help me?
And they're like, mm-mm.
Later come to find out theyknew where my house was.
They did not want to come.
But this friend of a friend ofa friend puts me in touch with a
medium.
She came over.
She did some saging.
She did some magic stuff I hadnever seen before.
And then I remember when she'sall done spraying magic spray

(01:10:36):
and smoke and fun things, whichI make in light of now, but I
use them all now.
But at the time I was like, ohmy God, what is she doing?
We sit down on my living roomfloor and I look at her and I'm
like, why me?
Why is this happening?
Why?
Because now I felt trickedbecause I wanted to live in that
house.
And she goes, well, becauseyou're a medium.

(01:10:56):
And I was like, ha, ha, ha, ha,ha.
No.

Unknown (01:10:58):
No.

Speaker 01 (01:10:59):
And if this is what that work is like, no, thank
you.
And she said to me, mediums arelike lanterns in the night.
Spirit knows who will listen,and you listen.
And I was like, yuck.
At the time, I'm like, I don'twant to deal with murderers.
I don't want to be having thisstuff happen.
But now, all these years later,I can actually thank him.

(01:11:25):
He brought me down this path.
And do you remember earlierwhen I said, I firmly believe we
can change on the other side?
This always makes me want tocry.
I feel like through me helpingother people, he has tried to
redeem himself.
And what was interesting is, isI can remember very firmly that

(01:11:51):
even though I had felt weird mywhole life, I always felt like
I was a weird kid.
I would play and hang out withkids, but I would always feel
like I was on the outsidelooking in.
That there was a part of methat was always hanging back,
and I didn't understand why.
Kind of makes sense now.
And I just lost my train ofthought.
I love this story.
Where did it go?

(01:12:11):
He's probably messing with me.
Darn it.
This is the best part.
Well, his name is Jan.
Oh, when she said, I'm on thispath and this and that, I didn't
want any part of it.
Nope, nope, nope.
Brain's still gone.
Help me out here, Sam.

Speaker 02 (01:12:28):
Where

Speaker 01 (01:12:30):
am I going with this?
This is like my favorite part.
Oh, no, I know where it was.
So even though I had felt weirdmy whole life, this is when the
connection came.
I know from, without a doubt,this is when I got my first
reading, my first message fromSpirit.
So the night I find all of thisout, I'm raw.

(01:12:52):
My nerves are sticking out ofmy skin.
It was awful.
And I still got tiny babies andeverything.
I bring all my kids in my room.
I bring my son in.
I'm like, you're sleepingthere.
Babies are sleeping everywhere.
We're all going to sleeptogether because I'm scared.
I'm scared of a dead guy whodid something bad.
I don't know.
I did not sleep a wink.
I sat up in my bed all night,stick straight, watching the

(01:13:15):
shadows.
All night, over and over andover, all I heard was talk to
the principal, talk to theprincipal, talk to the
principal, talk to theprincipal.
Not the principal of theCatholic high school.
The principal of thekindergarten where my daughter
was.
I knew it intuitively.
I was supposed to go talk tothe principal.
And that was weird to me.
I was like, why am I supposedto talk to the principal?
And I'm just sitting there inthe dark.

(01:13:36):
And you know those nights thatnever end?
It's just the night that willnot end.
The sun comes up.
And I wake him up.
And I said, you're not going toschool.
You're watching your sisters.
I'm supposed to go talk to theprincipal.
It was bizarre.
I get dressed.
I get my kindergartener ready.
We go to the school.
And I knew the principal.
And I walk up to her.
And I'm like, we need to talk.

(01:13:57):
I'm supposed to talk to youabout my house.
And she said, go wait in myoffice.
I'll get the kids to class.
And then I'll meet you inthere.
So she sits down across fromme.
And she's like, so what's thisabout?
I'm like, I think you knowsomething about my house.
And she's like, well, where doyou live?
And so I tell her the guy'sname and what happened.
And she's like, oh, yeah.

(01:14:17):
And what was so beautiful abouthim sending me there is my
imagination, as with most of us,is far worse than the truth.
So while he did what he did,and it was horrible.
My mind had been going allnight long like, oh, my God,
he's just this awful, horriblemurderer.

(01:14:37):
He's, you know, hacking peopleup, and he's just evil and
scary, and, you know, my mind isgoing nuts.
She's able to tell me this waslike a normal, great family.
He would come to the school,volunteer.
She would.
The kids were great.
He snapped one day.

(01:14:58):
He had depression, and he justsnapped.
that doesn't excuse murder atall.
But thinking that he was thispsychopath was far scarier than
realizing this man wasanguished.
And so that message that I gotthat night, to go talk to the

(01:15:19):
principal, I will never forget.
And I will always cherish thatas really one of the first real
messages from spirit that I gotthat put me on this path to
realize how much information wecan actually get from the other
side.
Yeah, that's it.
We're done.
Thank you.
Aw, thanks.

(01:15:40):
You're welcome.
To learn more, visit me atallisnotlostpodcast.com.

(01:16:12):
or reach out anytime via emailat allisnotlostpodcast at
gmail.com.
I'll be back soon with moreepisodes.
Until then, take care.

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