Why Your Family Isn’t Supporting Your Dreams – And One Game-Changing Tip to Shift That.

A transformative moment changed my perspective forever when my girlfriend refused to support my venture - not because she didn't care, but because I hadn't given her reason to believe in what I was doing. This raw, honest conversation explores the uncomfortable truth many of us refuse to acknowledge: no one owes us support simply because of their relationship to us.

Why should someone support your dreams? "Because they're my spouse" or "because they're family" aren't legitimate reasons. These relationships don't automatically entitle us to unconditional backing of our endeavors. True support must be earned through demonstrated commitment and consistent action. When we're half-hearted about our pursuits - enthusiastic one day, disengaged the next - we signal to others that we're not serious. Yet paradoxically, we still expect them to treat our efforts as worthy of their full support.

The reality is both simple and profound: when people see you fully committed - when they witness your struggles, failures, persistence, and growth - their support becomes almost inevitable. They can't help but rally behind someone visibly invested in their own success. But this requires brutal honesty with yourself first. Are you truly committed to what you claim to want? Are you doing the necessary work, or just playing at it while expecting royal treatment? We teach people how to treat us. If you're unhappy with the support you're receiving, perhaps it's time to teach something new by changing your own behavior first. Let them see you rise, struggle, learn, and persevere. Their commitment will follow yours.

Ready to transform how others perceive your goals? Start by transforming your commitment to them. If you actually took time to learn about how incredible you are, nothing would ever stop you.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Sometimes we get yeah , you're my husband, you should

(00:02):
support me.
You're my wife, you're mygirlfriend, you're my boyfriend.
You're my brother's sister.
Why should they support you?
Just because they're related toyou, because they share your
bed or last name?
That's not really a realjustifiable reason to support
you.
If you actually took time tolearn about how incredible you
were, nothing would ever stopyou.
They should support you if theysee that you're doing the

(00:26):
things necessary to besuccessful, whatever you're
doing.
But if someone sees that you'renot doing the things necessary
to be successful and then you'reasking for their support anyway
, that's kind of immature onyour part.
You're.
You're putting theresponsibility on that other
person to give you the thingthat you haven't given them a
reason to support.
You want the support withoutpaying the price.
And that's where I was.

(00:46):
And let me tell you something Igot mad that night.
I got mad that my girlfriendhad to even say that to me.
I got, I was mad, I was upset,I was so.
I was so mad and I made adecision that night, a decision
that I don't want to ever haveto be at that place again, where
I have to look that person inthe face and ask for something,

(01:07):
knowing deep in the back of mymind and in my heart, if I
really was honest about it, thatI was in the situation I was in
because I wasn't handling mybusiness.
I don't know where this findsyou.
Maybe you're already winning inwhat you're doing, so maybe
this is a never happened to youconversation.
Maybe everyone around yousupported you.

(01:29):
Maybe you showed them day oneyou're doing so.
Maybe this is a never happenedto you conversation.
Maybe everyone around yousupported you.
Maybe you showed them day oneyou're the best, you're all in,
you're.
Whatever you're doing, you'regoing for it.
Maybe that's your situation, oror maybe not.
Maybe your situation is kind ofsimilar to my situation.
You've got this thing, you'redoing this business, you're
doing this venture, you'retaking advantage of whatever
that is, but you're not reallyall in.
But you want the people aroundyou to treat you like you're all

(01:51):
in.
You want the the rights ofbeing all in without the
responsibility of being all in.
It's hard to ask for the rightswithout the responsibility, but
we do it all the time justbecause we feel we deserve it,
even though we haven't proventhat we deserve it.
We just feel like we deserve it.
When you have something thatyou're up to and the people

(02:16):
around you see you're fullyvested, fully committed, fully
going in on it, they can't helpbut to jump it they can't.
It's impossible for them toignore you.
But when they see youtoe-dipping, half-hearted Bible

(02:36):
says double-minded you're in onMonday, you're kind of out on
Tuesday.
You're fired up on Wednesday.
You're questioning it onThursday.
You're kind of out on Tuesday,you're fired up on Wednesday.
You're questioning it onThursday, you're ignoring it on
Friday.
When they see that, why wouldthey throw their support behind
you?
Until you fully commit to thething that you say you want to

(02:59):
do, you do not have the right toask other people to commit
fully to the thing that you sayyou want to do in their support
of you.
You don't have the right.
This is going to burn somebody.
This is going to make somebodyupset.
Somebody's going to be mad.
I'm sure I'm going to get somecomments, some texts.
Somebody's going to say, well,they should support me because,

(03:21):
no, they don't owe you anything,no one owes you anything.
Once you get that reality, checkthat no one owes you anything,
then everything is earned andeverything.
If someone just gives it to youjust because it's you.
You didn't earn it, so it'skind of cheap.
But when you understand thatthe things that you want to do
in your life, that there arepeople who legitimately want to

(03:42):
support you, however, you've gotto earn the right to be
supported, that night wasspecial for me.
Now I'm no longer with her.
However, I'm grateful to herBecause that night changed my
perspective on me.
It didn't, you know, it wasn't,you know, it wasn't a moment

(04:04):
that I thought I'd be thinkingabout like 25 years later, but
it was an important moment.
And when I meet people and theyhear this all the time you know
my mom won't support me, my dadwon't support me or my best
friend won't support me, and I'mthinking to myself.
And then I ask them thequestion have you given them a
reason to?

(04:24):
And almost 9 out of 10 timesthe answer is no, when they
really understand what I mean bythat.
Well, they're my mom, theyshould support me.
Why it's my husband they shouldsupport me?
Why?
Well, it's my husband, heshould support me?

(04:49):
Why?
Just because we teach people howto treat us, and if you don't
like how you're being treated,then it's time to teach
something new.
Let them see you rise.
Let them see you pay your price.
Let them see you struggle, fail, keep going.
Let them see whatever you wantto do.
Let them see you obsessivelytalk about it.

(05:09):
Let them see you learning aboutit, getting better at it.
Let them see that you're fullycommitted and they'll commit.
But until you're fullycommitted, hold no one
responsible for the commitmentsyou're not keeping for yourself.
Hope this landed.
If you actually took time tolearn about how incredible you

(05:32):
were, nothing would ever stopyou See.
The definition of sight is thefaculty or power of seeing.