March 20, 2025 • 19 mins
Last week, I spent 24 hours supporting teachers in running restorative justice classroom circles, and the impact was powerful. In this episode, I’m sharing what I witnessed—the challenges, the breakthroughs, and the small but meaningful shifts that happen when teachers commit to building relationships, not just managing behavior.
🔹 How teachers are integrating circles into their classrooms
🔹 The impact on student relationships, behavior & learning
🔹 Why rituals for “softness” matter in schools
🔹 Lessons on patience, trust & shifting school culture
Whether you’re an educator, school leader, or RJ practitioner, this episode will give you practical insights on how to make restorative practices sustainable in classrooms.
🔗 Resources & Next Steps:
✨ Join the free Amplify RJ community & access the other courses & membership resources: https://community.amplifyrj.com/communities/groups/arjcommunity/home?invite=67dc711150ec55e8a8a03a1b
✨ Download my Classroom Connection Prompts (Pay What You Can!): https://amplifyrj.com/questions-for-connected-classrooms
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Last week I spent 24 hours supporting teachers
develop their restorativejustice circle-keeping practice,
and this is what I learned.
But first, if you're new here,my name is David Ryan, barsega,
castro-harris all five names forall the ancestors and I'm here
to support you, build andstrengthen relationships rooted
in equity and trust, as well asrepair relationships when
(00:20):
conflict and harm occurs in youreveryday life, using frameworks
, philosophies, practices andvalues of restorative justice.
I've been privileged enough tosupport people doing this work
in so many different settings,including schools, organizations
and even community andfamily-based situations.
Today I want to share someinsights from this particular
school that I've been workingwith for the last couple years.
A little bit of backgroundabout them.
(00:41):
Their principal reached out tome because COVID had really
messed with some of thecommunity dynamics that had
existed.
So many of the structures thatthey had for supporting each
other had gone away and bringingthem back had been a struggle.
This led to a lot ofmiscommunication and a lot of
behavior challenges, and shoutout to her for identifying
restorative justice philosophy,practices and values as a way
(01:02):
forward philosophy, practicesand values as a way forward.
In our first year together, wespent the bulk of our time
teaching people the foundationsof restorative justice practices
, philosophy and values inopposition to white supremacy,
culture, challenging ideas ofurgency, one right way of doing
things, perfectionism, and somany different things.
You can learn more about thefoundations of restorative
justice in videos linked below,but this year we're building on
(01:23):
that knowledge and reallyfocusing on the skills that it
takes to facilitate restorativespaces, whether that's a
restorative circle or conference, or a restorative conversation
or community building spaces.
Sitting in a circle and askingrestorative questions is one
thing.
Creating the container forvulnerable sharing is another,
and so that's what our focus wason this year.
Earlier in the year, I tookthem through facilitation
(01:47):
frameworks, the role of a circlekeeper, the structure of a
circle, and so when I came backlast week, we spent half a day
all together in a training androle playing setting, and then
the rest of the time I wasworking directly with grade
level teams, contextualizingwhat I've taught to their
practices, celebrating theirwins and refining their practice
(02:08):
to continue to build theircapacity to strengthen and
repair relationships withintheir classroom context.
A lot of people use the wordcircle to refer to a lot of
different things and for thepurposes of this conversation, I
wanted to find those terms.
I was brought up in this workusing a indigenous peacemaking
circle framework but because ofthe constraints of working
(02:31):
within a public school, that'snot what I was teaching them or
asking them to do.
Holding space on that leveltakes a lot more spiritual inner
work than, from my perspective,what is reasonable to ask
people who are doing this forthe terms of their employment.
So what I focused on insteadwere some necessary structures
to facilitate that vulnerablespace and communication skills
(02:51):
to make sure that people feelseen, heard and a sense of
belonging in that space.
That structure is still ingeneral, getting acquainted,
building trust, addressingissues and closing.
And while the elements of apeacemaking circle are there,
I'm not asking or expect thesefolks that I'm working with in
this framework to build in thoseceremonial aspects.
(03:12):
A culturally and spirituallyrooted practice can take this
work to much deeper levels, butthis framework, as I've
introduced it to them, hasalready had some wonderful
results, as I talked through thetangible goals of this work
with their principal.
Wonderful results.
As I talked through thetangible goals of this work with
their principal, we decidedthat the invitation for the
teachers was to use what Itaught to create a ritual for
(03:33):
softness in their classroom, sothere was a lot of flexibility
for the teachers as they weredeveloping ways to integrate
this practice.
Some of them use it in morningmeetings to start the day.
Some of them use it as a middaycheck-in.
Some of them use them asclosing circles for the day.
They're not always sitting onthe floor together in circle,
they're not always passing atalking piece, but even without
(03:55):
a uniform structure that ispracticed across the school,
their dedication to creatingthis ritual and consistently
practicing it has alreadybrought some amazing results.
So many of the staff that I wasworking with were so excited to
share that they've noticed somany more connections between
students because of thesecircles.
When students are given dailyopportunities to share about
(04:16):
their lives and get to know eachother, they find more things in
common and so are able toconnect in different ways.
Finding out things you didn'tknow about your classmates
invites you or gives you anentryway into having
conversations with them on theplayground or while you're doing
seat work.
Having daily check-ins lets youknow how their classmates are
doing, and so they treat themaccordingly, knowing that
(04:36):
somebody might have had arougher day or someone's really
excited.
So the students have been ableto make connections with each
other and have conversationsaround things that are talked
about in circle.
Some of the staff even noticedthat at recess they see their
kids not the whole group, butmaybe a group of 10 of them
sitting around in a circle andtalking, not necessarily passing
a talking piece, but they'reseeing different manifestations
(04:58):
of these behaviors since theystarted this ritual.
Not only are the students moreconnected, the staff has more
insight into what's going onwith the kids, and that's
another foundation for buildingdeeper relationships.
So many times, staff-to-studentinteractions within the context
of a classroom or a school arelimited to instruction and
behavior management.
But building in this structurewhere students are sharing and
(05:19):
adults are sharing allows bothto get to know each other on a
more human-to-human level, andthat gives them a foundation for
deeper conversations and moreof a relationship to be able to
have harder conversations.
Adults feel more of a capacityto challenge students when the
solid relationship is there,because the student sees them as
human and not just as theteacher who's always telling me
(05:40):
to be quiet and keep working oryou can do it work harder.
It goes back to that adage ofpeople don't care how much you
know until they know how muchyou care, and using these
rituals for soft start orsharing in these vulnerable
spaces has given them so manymore opportunities to connect on
that level Across the gradelevels, kindergarten through
fifth grade.
Staff also notice their studentsdeveloping their listening
(06:01):
skills and their patience whenyou're sitting in a circle, or
Staff also notice their studentsdeveloping their listening
skills and their patience rightwhen you're sitting in a circle
or sitting listening intently tothe person who's holding the
talking piece or the personwho's speaking.
That gives you a lot ofpractice in active listening.
When they set up these rituals,they have explicit
conversations about what itmeans to be a good participant
in these circles, and that's notto say that there aren't
(06:22):
students that get distracted.
It's developmentallyappropriate for five to even
12-year-olds in these circles,and that's not to say that there
aren't students that getdistracted.
It's developmentallyappropriate for five to even 12
year olds in that space, andthere are varying degrees of
active listening being engagedin by all of those students.
But having this practice hashelped so many students both
develop their capacity to sitand listen, but also to more
confidently speak when they knowthat everyone is giving them
(06:46):
attention in a non-judgmentalspace.
One thing that I never thoughtabout when it comes to talking
circles is how it can be sobeneficial for second language
development.
Like many schools across thecountry, many of these
classrooms have students who arelearning English, and one of
the most insightful things thatI heard from my conversations
with the teachers this week wasabout how a student who came
(07:08):
into this school year notspeaking English has developed
so much more confidence incircle because of, one, the
repetition.
Two, the non-judgmental vibesand three, the affirmation and
attention and positivereinforcement that they get from
their teacher and their peerswhen they are able to share, and
positive reinforcement thatthey get from their teacher and
their peers when they are ableto share and celebrate.
(07:28):
In that context, the repetitivenature of Circle and the
ability to intently listen toone speaker at a time was so
helpful for the students'vocabulary development and
interpretation skills.
So those are just a few of thebenefits that we celebrated from
their circle practice, and I'mcurious if you're someone who
practices talking circles in thecontext of a classroom or these
(07:51):
intentional spaces forcommunity building and sharing,
what have the benefits been foryou?
After we celebrated, we spenttime refining their practice and
, because I'm not observing intheir classroom.
I had them share with me inpainstaking detail what happens
from the moment they say timefor circle till the close.
(08:11):
We analyzed everything, fromthe way they called folks'
attention to how they generatedquestions for circle, to the
logistical space they weresitting in and utilizing, the
way that they were remindingpeople of the values and
guidelines and norms.
It was really helpful for me toget understanding of what they
were doing, and it was also areally helpful moment for them
(08:32):
to intently reflect on what theywere doing on a day-to-day
basis.
As an aside, part of me knowsthat there's a lot that I bring
to the table in that space asfar as knowledge and experience,
but I was also struck by thefact that they knew how to shift
and adjust their structuresbased off of their lived
experience, but they hadn't haddedicated time to talk about
(08:53):
this and, without going on awhole nother tangent, I know one
of the biggest barriers todoing restorative justice in
schools well, or any kind ofwork, is the time that it takes.
So my encouragement to you,wherever you are in your
restorative justice practitionerjourney, is that, yes, it's
important to learn, yes, it'simportant to practice, but it's
also really important to setaside time for intentional
(09:15):
reflection, even using thoserestorative questions, of what
happened, what was the impactand what must be addressed in
order to make things right orbetter.
Moving forward can be a reallysimple but helpful framing for
deeper learning and betterpractice.
Across the grade levels, wespent the most of our time
thinking about the beginning ofthose rituals, the closing of
(09:37):
those rituals and the intentionbehind the prompts and questions
.
The closing of those ritualsand the intention behind the
prompts and questions.
There's a lot that's happeningwithin the context of a school
day, and all within very rigidtime boundaries.
Kids are being pulled out ofthe class for testing and
additional support, there arevery regimented breaks for
recess and lunch and specials orextracurricular activities, and
(09:59):
so finding the time to createthese rituals and not rush
through them is really important.
The staff at the school and Ihad talked about that in our
previous learning sessions, andso most of them had carved out
these times at the beginning orend of the day.
But even with that carved outtime, that space can feel rushed
, and so starting it in a goodway and ending it in a good way
(10:21):
to remove urgency, to giveintentional focus, is really
important, remembering that theinvitation was to invite
softness into the space.
Abrupt approaches hey,everybody, time to get on the
rug, it's circle time, or at theend, all right, thanks for
sharing.
Now on to math Aren't really themost conducive towards building
that soft, vulnerableness,vulnerable, courageous container
(10:42):
?
Many of the teams were usingvisual timers along with music,
and those things can certainlybe helpful, but the way that you
invite and set intention forthe space when people are
sitting down is also reallyimportant.
Reminding people of the purpose, of why you're sitting together
, reminding them that it's aninvitation into softness, to
more connection, to morecommunity, to more belonging, is
(11:05):
important Because, as SamuelJohnson is credited for sharing,
people need to be reminded morethan they need to be instructed
.
So those invitations asreminders can be so helpful for
setting the tone and making surepeople know what's expected of
them.
It doesn't mean that they won'tstill need reminders throughout
(11:25):
the circle, especially with theyounger ones, but that
invitation is very important.
Similarly, the closing isimportant.
When you're building thesecontainers for softness, for
vulnerability, for sharing, youneed to be intentional about
transitioning into the rhythm ofthe rest of the day.
It's not always the case thatstudents are sharing the deepest
, vulnerable things, but whentheir sharing is not
(11:46):
acknowledged or affirmed inreflection during a checkout or
closing process, it can be areally abrupt transition.
Going back into academics, somaking sure that, after everyone
has shared, someone isacknowledging the beauty of the
practice that they just engagedin, thanking people for sharing,
maybe highlighting some thingsthat were shared across the room
(12:08):
or maybe even makingconnections to other things that
are going on in the classroom,can really ease the transition.
So that was openings andclosings and everyone came to
their own frameworks for doingit.
But then we transitioned to aconversation about what it means
to share ownership of thesespaces with students.
There's an inherenthierarchical dynamic to what
happens within the context of aclassroom, to where adults,
(12:30):
teachers or assistants in theroom are seen as in charge and
students are just supposed tofollow directions With
restorative justice practices inmind, building and
strengthening relationshipsrooted in equity and trust.
Everyone has their roles, buteveryone has ownership of the
communal space and so havingownership into this ritual is
really important.
So for these rituals forsoftness, it's really important
(12:54):
that, to the extent possible,they're giving roles for
facilitation to students, forfacilitation to students.
In our time together we reviewedthe parts of the circle, from
the invitation to the welcome,to the check-in, to deciding the
questions, to asking thequestions, reminding people of
the norms and doing thatreflection and closing, and all
of those things can be done bystudents.
(13:14):
It's gonna take teaching andpreparation and accompaniment
and practice, but it is sodoable.
We spent the bulk of the restof our time strategizing and
planning what sharing ownershipwith students could look like
and how they could logisticallymake that happen.
Of course, it looks differentfrom kindergarten to fifth grade
.
In fifth grade, students werealready stepping into those
(13:37):
leadership roles.
One of the classes has a modelwhere they're doing two circles
simultaneously and one of theadults had to step out of the
room and a student stepped upand started to organically
facilitate.
When the adult came back, thestudents in that circle looked
to him for him to take over, buthe had seen what was going on
and said no, no, your friendsgot it, let's keep going.
If these rituals and practicesare consistent in your classroom
(14:00):
, there's a lot that studentswill just pick up from your
modeling and there's somepractical things that need to be
coached and finding the timeand space to do that, in
addition to choosing whichstudents are going to
participate or figuring out wayswhere everyone can equitably
participate took a lot ofintention in planning.
Again, it looked different inevery classroom, from pulling
the popsicle sticks to utilizingtheir internal infrastructure
(14:23):
for star student or student ofthe week or just asking for
volunteers, but the discussionin that space was a really
beautiful opportunity to makesure that students who wanted to
actively participate inco-facilitation had the
opportunity and that they weresupported in making sure that
they had the skills to do it.
They were supported in makingsure that they had the skills to
do it.
One of the things that Iappreciate the most about this
partnership that I have with theschool is the amount of time
(14:44):
that I've been given to supportstaff directly.
Time is so precious in schoolsand it's not lost on me that
this principal paid for subs, sowhole grade level teams could
spend half a day with me toreflect, celebrate, learn, but
then also have planning time toact on the things that we just
talked about.
Because we had so much time, Idedicated the last hour of each
(15:07):
of my sessions with the gradelevel teams to them just being
able to plan, and both they andI really appreciated that our
time together wasn't just fullof talking and theorizing and
reflecting, but actually beingable to plan, to put some things
in motion.
I was with them Monday,wednesday, thursday and Friday
of last week and I'm recordingthis on Monday and already I've
(15:29):
received so much feedback fromthe things that they were able
to implement immediatelyPrimarily, a lot more enthusiasm
and student participation incircles, but also follow ups
from the little things in thecontext of our conversations.
So shout out to the studentsand leadership of this school.
If you're watching this, youknow who you are.
And before I close this video,there are two more things that I
(15:49):
want to cover.
First, I hope that some of thisinside look into how I
supported the school has beenhelpful for you, and if you want
to deepen your restorativejustice practice on a school or
organization level, feel free toreach out info at amplifyrjcom.
But if you want to deepen yourpractice and get connected with
folks doing this work on anindividual level, there's the
(16:09):
Amplify RJ online community thatwill hopefully support your
needs.
There's a free level where youcan just get connected and tap
into some of the resources.
There's a $9 a month levelwhere, once a month, we get
together in vulnerable space notquite a circle but share how
things have been going and whatproblems of practice we've been
experiencing and reallyencouraging each other to
(16:30):
continue in this work and theAmplify RJ all access membership
gets you but my full library ofcourses and weekly support
calls so you can troubleshoot,get thought partnership or any
other support.
You need Links to all thatbelow, of course.
But because building andstrengthening relationships does
not take formal restorativejustice frameworks, I also
developed this resource forbuilding classroom connection.
(16:52):
These are prompts that can beused in morning meetings, daily
check-in, check-out circles.
They can even be used asjournaling.
There are prompts to varyingdepth.
Some are just get to know you,some are about friendship and
community building.
Some are about conflictresolution.
Some are about storytelling,building empathy.
So if you just want to startwith giving you and your
(17:12):
students opportunities forconnection, check out that
resource below.
Pay what you can.
Finally, to close, I want toshare a couple of reflections on
the impact of my practiceengaging with them in this work.
I was reminded again over thislast week for the necessity of
slowness and moving at the speedof trust and moving at the
speed of relationships.
People don't just changebehavior overnight, after
(17:35):
they've been socialized intoanother way of doing things, in
this case, traditional methodsof schooling that are rooted in
compliance and punishment.
Because I've been with thisschool for multiple years now,
it's been a really beautifuljourney to see their development
as someone who thinks aboutthese ideas all the time.
Some of the connections thatthey're making or needing to be
reminded of had me in the placeof, of course, why aren't you
(17:59):
doing this?
But then I'm always remindingmyself that that energy isn't
necessarily helpful.
Meeting people where they're atand reminding them of these
values and inviting them tocontinued practice has brought
me so much joy.
Building a relationship withthem, not just as a consultant,
but as a human who alsostruggles with this work,
especially as I'm growing as aparent, has been so beautiful.
(18:19):
I also know that it's allowedme to speak in ways that I can
be heard where I wouldn't if Ihad just showed up as an
instructor.
And the last piece that I wantto share for today is how we
closed all of our team meetings.
I asked them to share howthey're feeling and to affirm to
give an affirmation orappreciation to the person
sitting to their left as theypass the talking piece, so I'll
(18:45):
share and invite you to do thesame as we close.
I'm feeling grateful that youmade it to the end of this video
.
Please like and subscribe,share, comment, all the things.
Just by making it here.
I know you're my people and Iwould love to get connected in
whatever ways feel right.
Again, everything is linkedbelow Grateful, challenged,
because doing a video like thisis a new practice for me, and so
whatever you see in this editedversion is something that I
could live with, but I'm hopefuland challenged to do more and
(19:08):
do better, moving forward.
And then, finally, justgratitude to you for your
attention right now and yourdedication to doing this work.
The world needs it if we're allgoing to get free together.
So until next time, may you besafe, may you be happy, may you
be healthy, may you live withease and may you continue to do
the work to make that a realityfor everyone.
(19:29):
Peace.
Last week I spent 24 hours supporting teachers
develop their restorativejustice circle-keeping practice,
and this is what I learned.
But first, if you're new here,my name is David Ryan, barsega,
castro-harris all five names forall the ancestors and I'm here
to support you, build andstrengthen relationships rooted
in equity and trust, as well asrepair relationships when
(00:20):
conflict and harm occurs in youreveryday life, using frameworks
, philosophies, practices andvalues of restorative justice.
I've been privileged enough tosupport people doing this work
in so many different settings,including schools, organizations
and even community andfamily-based situations.
Today I want to share someinsights from this particular
school that I've been workingwith for the last couple years.
A little bit of backgroundabout them.
(00:41):
Their principal reached out tome because COVID had really
messed with some of thecommunity dynamics that had
existed.
So many of the structures thatthey had for supporting each
other had gone away and bringingthem back had been a struggle.
This led to a lot ofmiscommunication and a lot of
behavior challenges, and shoutout to her for identifying
restorative justice philosophy,practices and values as a way
(01:02):
forward philosophy, practicesand values as a way forward.
In our first year together, wespent the bulk of our time
teaching people the foundationsof restorative justice practices
, philosophy and values inopposition to white supremacy,
culture, challenging ideas ofurgency, one right way of doing
things, perfectionism, and somany different things.
You can learn more about thefoundations of restorative
justice in videos linked below,but this year we're building on
(01:23):
that knowledge and reallyfocusing on the skills that it
takes to facilitate restorativespaces, whether that's a
restorative circle or conference, or a restorative conversation
or community building spaces.
Sitting in a circle and askingrestorative questions is one
thing.
Creating the container forvulnerable sharing is another,
and so that's what our focus wason this year.
Earlier in the year, I tookthem through facilitation
(01:47):
frameworks, the role of a circlekeeper, the structure of a
circle, and so when I came backlast week, we spent half a day
all together in a training androle playing setting, and then
the rest of the time I wasworking directly with grade
level teams, contextualizingwhat I've taught to their
practices, celebrating theirwins and refining their practice
(02:08):
to continue to build theircapacity to strengthen and
repair relationships withintheir classroom context.
A lot of people use the wordcircle to refer to a lot of
different things and for thepurposes of this conversation, I
wanted to find those terms.
I was brought up in this workusing a indigenous peacemaking
circle framework but because ofthe constraints of working
(02:31):
within a public school, that'snot what I was teaching them or
asking them to do.
Holding space on that leveltakes a lot more spiritual inner
work than, from my perspective,what is reasonable to ask
people who are doing this forthe terms of their employment.
So what I focused on insteadwere some necessary structures
to facilitate that vulnerablespace and communication skills
(02:51):
to make sure that people feelseen, heard and a sense of
belonging in that space.
That structure is still ingeneral, getting acquainted,
building trust, addressingissues and closing.
And while the elements of apeacemaking circle are there,
I'm not asking or expect thesefolks that I'm working with in
this framework to build in thoseceremonial aspects.
(03:12):
A culturally and spirituallyrooted practice can take this
work to much deeper levels, butthis framework, as I've
introduced it to them, hasalready had some wonderful
results, as I talked through thetangible goals of this work
with their principal.
Wonderful results.
As I talked through thetangible goals of this work with
their principal, we decidedthat the invitation for the
teachers was to use what Itaught to create a ritual for
(03:33):
softness in their classroom, sothere was a lot of flexibility
for the teachers as they weredeveloping ways to integrate
this practice.
Some of them use it in morningmeetings to start the day.
Some of them use it as a middaycheck-in.
Some of them use them asclosing circles for the day.
They're not always sitting onthe floor together in circle,
they're not always passing atalking piece, but even without
(03:55):
a uniform structure that ispracticed across the school,
their dedication to creatingthis ritual and consistently
practicing it has alreadybrought some amazing results.
So many of the staff that I wasworking with were so excited to
share that they've noticed somany more connections between
students because of thesecircles.
When students are given dailyopportunities to share about
(04:16):
their lives and get to know eachother, they find more things in
common and so are able toconnect in different ways.
Finding out things you didn'tknow about your classmates
invites you or gives you anentryway into having
conversations with them on theplayground or while you're doing
seat work.
Having daily check-ins lets youknow how their classmates are
doing, and so they treat themaccordingly, knowing that
(04:36):
somebody might have had arougher day or someone's really
excited.
So the students have been ableto make connections with each
other and have conversationsaround things that are talked
about in circle.
Some of the staff even noticedthat at recess they see their
kids not the whole group, butmaybe a group of 10 of them
sitting around in a circle andtalking, not necessarily passing
a talking piece, but they'reseeing different manifestations
(04:58):
of these behaviors since theystarted this ritual.
Not only are the students moreconnected, the staff has more
insight into what's going onwith the kids, and that's
another foundation for buildingdeeper relationships.
So many times, staff-to-studentinteractions within the context
of a classroom or a school arelimited to instruction and
behavior management.
But building in this structurewhere students are sharing and
(05:19):
adults are sharing allows bothto get to know each other on a
more human-to-human level, andthat gives them a foundation for
deeper conversations and moreof a relationship to be able to
have harder conversations.
Adults feel more of a capacityto challenge students when the
solid relationship is there,because the student sees them as
human and not just as theteacher who's always telling me
(05:40):
to be quiet and keep working oryou can do it work harder.
It goes back to that adage ofpeople don't care how much you
know until they know how muchyou care, and using these
rituals for soft start orsharing in these vulnerable
spaces has given them so manymore opportunities to connect on
that level Across the gradelevels, kindergarten through
fifth grade.
Staff also notice their studentsdeveloping their listening
(06:01):
skills and their patience whenyou're sitting in a circle, or
Staff also notice their studentsdeveloping their listening
skills and their patience rightwhen you're sitting in a circle
or sitting listening intently tothe person who's holding the
talking piece or the personwho's speaking.
That gives you a lot ofpractice in active listening.
When they set up these rituals,they have explicit
conversations about what itmeans to be a good participant
in these circles, and that's notto say that there aren't
(06:22):
students that get distracted.
It's developmentallyappropriate for five to even
12-year-olds in these circles,and that's not to say that there
aren't students that getdistracted.
It's developmentallyappropriate for five to even 12
year olds in that space, andthere are varying degrees of
active listening being engagedin by all of those students.
But having this practice hashelped so many students both
develop their capacity to sitand listen, but also to more
confidently speak when they knowthat everyone is giving them
(06:46):
attention in a non-judgmentalspace.
One thing that I never thoughtabout when it comes to talking
circles is how it can be sobeneficial for second language
development.
Like many schools across thecountry, many of these
classrooms have students who arelearning English, and one of
the most insightful things thatI heard from my conversations
with the teachers this week wasabout how a student who came
(07:08):
into this school year notspeaking English has developed
so much more confidence incircle because of, one, the
repetition.
Two, the non-judgmental vibesand three, the affirmation and
attention and positivereinforcement that they get from
their teacher and their peerswhen they are able to share, and
positive reinforcement thatthey get from their teacher and
their peers when they are ableto share and celebrate.
(07:28):
In that context, the repetitivenature of Circle and the
ability to intently listen toone speaker at a time was so
helpful for the students'vocabulary development and
interpretation skills.
So those are just a few of thebenefits that we celebrated from
their circle practice, and I'mcurious if you're someone who
practices talking circles in thecontext of a classroom or these
(07:51):
intentional spaces forcommunity building and sharing,
what have the benefits been foryou?
After we celebrated, we spenttime refining their practice and
, because I'm not observing intheir classroom.
I had them share with me inpainstaking detail what happens
from the moment they say timefor circle till the close.
(08:11):
We analyzed everything, fromthe way they called folks'
attention to how they generatedquestions for circle, to the
logistical space they weresitting in and utilizing, the
way that they were remindingpeople of the values and
guidelines and norms.
It was really helpful for me toget understanding of what they
were doing, and it was also areally helpful moment for them
(08:32):
to intently reflect on what theywere doing on a day-to-day
basis.
As an aside, part of me knowsthat there's a lot that I bring
to the table in that space asfar as knowledge and experience,
but I was also struck by thefact that they knew how to shift
and adjust their structuresbased off of their lived
experience, but they hadn't haddedicated time to talk about
(08:53):
this and, without going on awhole nother tangent, I know one
of the biggest barriers todoing restorative justice in
schools well, or any kind ofwork, is the time that it takes.
So my encouragement to you,wherever you are in your
restorative justice practitionerjourney, is that, yes, it's
important to learn, yes, it'simportant to practice, but it's
also really important to setaside time for intentional
(09:15):
reflection, even using thoserestorative questions, of what
happened, what was the impactand what must be addressed in
order to make things right orbetter.
Moving forward can be a reallysimple but helpful framing for
deeper learning and betterpractice.
Across the grade levels, wespent the most of our time
thinking about the beginning ofthose rituals, the closing of
(09:37):
those rituals and the intentionbehind the prompts and questions
.
The closing of those ritualsand the intention behind the
prompts and questions.
There's a lot that's happeningwithin the context of a school
day, and all within very rigidtime boundaries.
Kids are being pulled out ofthe class for testing and
additional support, there arevery regimented breaks for
recess and lunch and specials orextracurricular activities, and
(09:59):
so finding the time to createthese rituals and not rush
through them is really important.
The staff at the school and Ihad talked about that in our
previous learning sessions, andso most of them had carved out
these times at the beginning orend of the day.
But even with that carved outtime, that space can feel rushed
, and so starting it in a goodway and ending it in a good way
(10:21):
to remove urgency, to giveintentional focus, is really
important, remembering that theinvitation was to invite
softness into the space.
Abrupt approaches hey,everybody, time to get on the
rug, it's circle time, or at theend, all right, thanks for
sharing.
Now on to math Aren't really themost conducive towards building
that soft, vulnerableness,vulnerable, courageous container
(10:42):
?
Many of the teams were usingvisual timers along with music,
and those things can certainlybe helpful, but the way that you
invite and set intention forthe space when people are
sitting down is also reallyimportant.
Reminding people of the purpose, of why you're sitting together
, reminding them that it's aninvitation into softness, to
more connection, to morecommunity, to more belonging, is
(11:05):
important Because, as SamuelJohnson is credited for sharing,
people need to be reminded morethan they need to be instructed
.
So those invitations asreminders can be so helpful for
setting the tone and making surepeople know what's expected of
them.
It doesn't mean that they won'tstill need reminders throughout
(11:25):
the circle, especially with theyounger ones, but that
invitation is very important.
Similarly, the closing isimportant.
When you're building thesecontainers for softness, for
vulnerability, for sharing, youneed to be intentional about
transitioning into the rhythm ofthe rest of the day.
It's not always the case thatstudents are sharing the deepest
, vulnerable things, but whentheir sharing is not
(11:46):
acknowledged or affirmed inreflection during a checkout or
closing process, it can be areally abrupt transition.
Going back into academics, somaking sure that, after everyone
has shared, someone isacknowledging the beauty of the
practice that they just engagedin, thanking people for sharing,
maybe highlighting some thingsthat were shared across the room
(12:08):
or maybe even makingconnections to other things that
are going on in the classroom,can really ease the transition.
So that was openings andclosings and everyone came to
their own frameworks for doingit.
But then we transitioned to aconversation about what it means
to share ownership of thesespaces with students.
There's an inherenthierarchical dynamic to what
happens within the context of aclassroom, to where adults,
(12:30):
teachers or assistants in theroom are seen as in charge and
students are just supposed tofollow directions With
restorative justice practices inmind, building and
strengthening relationshipsrooted in equity and trust.
Everyone has their roles, buteveryone has ownership of the
communal space and so havingownership into this ritual is
really important.
So for these rituals forsoftness, it's really important
(12:54):
that, to the extent possible,they're giving roles for
facilitation to students, forfacilitation to students.
In our time together we reviewedthe parts of the circle, from
the invitation to the welcome,to the check-in, to deciding the
questions, to asking thequestions, reminding people of
the norms and doing thatreflection and closing, and all
of those things can be done bystudents.
(13:14):
It's gonna take teaching andpreparation and accompaniment
and practice, but it is sodoable.
We spent the bulk of the restof our time strategizing and
planning what sharing ownershipwith students could look like
and how they could logisticallymake that happen.
Of course, it looks differentfrom kindergarten to fifth grade
.
In fifth grade, students werealready stepping into those
(13:37):
leadership roles.
One of the classes has a modelwhere they're doing two circles
simultaneously and one of theadults had to step out of the
room and a student stepped upand started to organically
facilitate.
When the adult came back, thestudents in that circle looked
to him for him to take over, buthe had seen what was going on
and said no, no, your friendsgot it, let's keep going.
If these rituals and practicesare consistent in your classroom
(14:00):
, there's a lot that studentswill just pick up from your
modeling and there's somepractical things that need to be
coached and finding the timeand space to do that, in
addition to choosing whichstudents are going to
participate or figuring out wayswhere everyone can equitably
participate took a lot ofintention in planning.
Again, it looked different inevery classroom, from pulling
the popsicle sticks to utilizingtheir internal infrastructure
(14:23):
for star student or student ofthe week or just asking for
volunteers, but the discussionin that space was a really
beautiful opportunity to makesure that students who wanted to
actively participate inco-facilitation had the
opportunity and that they weresupported in making sure that
they had the skills to do it.
They were supported in makingsure that they had the skills to
do it.
One of the things that Iappreciate the most about this
partnership that I have with theschool is the amount of time
(14:44):
that I've been given to supportstaff directly.
Time is so precious in schoolsand it's not lost on me that
this principal paid for subs, sowhole grade level teams could
spend half a day with me toreflect, celebrate, learn, but
then also have planning time toact on the things that we just
talked about.
Because we had so much time, Idedicated the last hour of each
(15:07):
of my sessions with the gradelevel teams to them just being
able to plan, and both they andI really appreciated that our
time together wasn't just fullof talking and theorizing and
reflecting, but actually beingable to plan, to put some things
in motion.
I was with them Monday,wednesday, thursday and Friday
of last week and I'm recordingthis on Monday and already I've
(15:29):
received so much feedback fromthe things that they were able
to implement immediatelyPrimarily, a lot more enthusiasm
and student participation incircles, but also follow ups
from the little things in thecontext of our conversations.
So shout out to the studentsand leadership of this school.
If you're watching this, youknow who you are.
And before I close this video,there are two more things that I
(15:49):
want to cover.
First, I hope that some of thisinside look into how I
supported the school has beenhelpful for you, and if you want
to deepen your restorativejustice practice on a school or
organization level, feel free toreach out info at amplifyrjcom.
But if you want to deepen yourpractice and get connected with
folks doing this work on anindividual level, there's the
(16:09):
Amplify RJ online community thatwill hopefully support your
needs.
There's a free level where youcan just get connected and tap
into some of the resources.
There's a $9 a month levelwhere, once a month, we get
together in vulnerable space notquite a circle but share how
things have been going and whatproblems of practice we've been
experiencing and reallyencouraging each other to
(16:30):
continue in this work and theAmplify RJ all access membership
gets you but my full library ofcourses and weekly support
calls so you can troubleshoot,get thought partnership or any
other support.
You need Links to all thatbelow, of course.
But because building andstrengthening relationships does
not take formal restorativejustice frameworks, I also
developed this resource forbuilding classroom connection.
(16:52):
These are prompts that can beused in morning meetings, daily
check-in, check-out circles.
They can even be used asjournaling.
There are prompts to varyingdepth.
Some are just get to know you,some are about friendship and
community building.
Some are about conflictresolution.
Some are about storytelling,building empathy.
So if you just want to startwith giving you and your
(17:12):
students opportunities forconnection, check out that
resource below.
Pay what you can.
Finally, to close, I want toshare a couple of reflections on
the impact of my practiceengaging with them in this work.
I was reminded again over thislast week for the necessity of
slowness and moving at the speedof trust and moving at the
speed of relationships.
People don't just changebehavior overnight, after
(17:35):
they've been socialized intoanother way of doing things, in
this case, traditional methodsof schooling that are rooted in
compliance and punishment.
Because I've been with thisschool for multiple years now,
it's been a really beautifuljourney to see their development
as someone who thinks aboutthese ideas all the time.
Some of the connections thatthey're making or needing to be
reminded of had me in the placeof, of course, why aren't you
(17:59):
doing this?
But then I'm always remindingmyself that that energy isn't
necessarily helpful.
Meeting people where they're atand reminding them of these
values and inviting them tocontinued practice has brought
me so much joy.
Building a relationship withthem, not just as a consultant,
but as a human who alsostruggles with this work,
especially as I'm growing as aparent, has been so beautiful.
(18:19):
I also know that it's allowedme to speak in ways that I can
be heard where I wouldn't if Ihad just showed up as an
instructor.
And the last piece that I wantto share for today is how we
closed all of our team meetings.
I asked them to share howthey're feeling and to affirm to
give an affirmation orappreciation to the person
sitting to their left as theypass the talking piece, so I'll
(18:45):
share and invite you to do thesame as we close.
I'm feeling grateful that youmade it to the end of this video
.
Please like and subscribe,share, comment, all the things.
Just by making it here.
I know you're my people and Iwould love to get connected in
whatever ways feel right.
Again, everything is linkedbelow Grateful, challenged,
because doing a video like thisis a new practice for me, and so
whatever you see in this editedversion is something that I
could live with, but I'm hopefuland challenged to do more and
(19:08):
do better, moving forward.
And then, finally, justgratitude to you for your
attention right now and yourdedication to doing this work.
The world needs it if we're allgoing to get free together.
So until next time, may you besafe, may you be happy, may you
be healthy, may you live withease and may you continue to do
the work to make that a realityfor everyone.
(19:29):
Peace.
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