Confederate Statues, AI Ghosts, and Marriage Rescue Phrases

TALK TO ME, TEXT IT

When technology crosses the line from innovation to uncomfortable territory, we need to talk about it. Jim Acosta's recent interview with an AI-generated avatar of Joaquin Oliver—a teenager killed in the 2018 Parkland shooting—raises profound questions about grief, memory, and the ethics of digital resurrection. Created in partnership with his parents' gun control advocacy group, this AI offered generic responses about gun violence solutions while mimicking the personality of someone who would have turned 25 that very day. The conversation feels simultaneously heartbreaking and disturbing—a grieving parent potentially trapped in conversation with a digital ghost.

Meanwhile, the National Park Service has announced plans to restore and reinstall the statue of Confederate General Albert Pike that was toppled during the 2020 riots. This decision represents an important stance on historical preservation: "If we erase our history, we're no longer America." While our past isn't perfect—that's precisely why it's history—removing these monuments represents a dangerous path toward forgetting both our triumphs and failures.

On a lighter note, marriage experts suggest four simple words to prevent relationship arguments from spiraling: "Always assume good intentions." This phrase creates space for empathy before reaction, helping couples navigate potential conflicts with grace. After seventeen years of marriage, I've found that well-timed humor works wonders for defusing tension. My husband can sense when a conversation is heading south and cracks a joke that completely transforms the tone. What works in your relationship? Do you have specific phrases or techniques that help you communicate through difficult moments? Whether it's humor, taking a timeout, or assuming the best about your partner, these small communication strategies can make all the difference in maintaining healthy relationships.

What do you do to help tone down conversations with your spouse when things get heated? Share your wisdom—we could all use more tools for navigating the relationships that matter most.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Well, hello and good morning, Happy Tuesday.
We are going to get right to it.
I have three stories.
They're not heavy or dark oranything.
Well, one of them is kind ofweird.
Jim Acosta interviewsAI-generated avatar of deceased
teenager promoting gun controlmessage.
Oh, my word, we're going tosave that for the last.

(00:24):
No, actually we're going to.
You know what we're going tostart with that one.
I like to go heavy and then endlight.
Okay, oh dear, mr Giblets isgoing to get me on that one of
deceased teenager, jaquelineOliver, to promote a gun control
message.
On Monday, working with the guncontrol group Change the Ref,

(00:51):
founded by Oliver's parents,acosta had a conversation on his
sub stack with an avatarcreated by the father of the son
who was killed in the ParklandHigh School shooting in 2018.
He would have turned 25 onMonday.
I would like to know what yoursolution would be for gun
violence.

(01:11):
Acosta asked Great question.
I believe in a mix of strongergun control laws, mental health
support and community engagement.
We need to create safe spacesfor conversations and
connections, making sureeveryone feels seen and heard.
Oliver's avatar said it's aboutbuilding a culture of kindness

(01:33):
and understanding.
What do you think of that?
I think that's a great idea.
Hawkween, the CNN correspondent,said All right, let's back up
and let's analyze the answerthat this AI gave.
It's totally generic andbullshit.
It's nothing we're not doingalready.
We're already talking about it.

(01:53):
We're already talking mentalhealth support, community
engagement.
I mean, we're already doing allof this stuff.
All people are doing is justtalking about it.
I'm sure there's legislationout there that's happening too.
I don't know, I don't follow itthat in detail, but I just think
this is crazy, dangerousterritory.

(02:14):
Of course, mr Giblets respondedin the Twitter feed.
It's like one AI talking toanother AI.
Get it.
Artificial intelligence.
Jim Acosta.
Yeah, I agree, I agree, this isbizarre and dangerous.
Excuse me, and I, okay, hold ona minute.
Okay, had to clear my throat.

(02:35):
I don't know what was going onthere.
Look, I can feel bad for thisparent and I it's I don't even
know to bring.
I don't know.
I would not want to do this.
I don't think I would.
I don't know.
I've never lost a child, but tobring them back with AI is, oh,

(02:56):
it's heartbreaking and sad.
I don't know.
Just oh, it's dangerous.
I don't like it.
I don't like it.
So Acosta also asked questionslike what Oliver's favorite team
movies and TV shows were?
The Avatar answered and oftenasked Acosta the question back,

(03:19):
sometimes sounding robotic,sometimes highly enthusiastic.
Star Wars is such an epic saga.
The adventures, the charactersand that iconic music are
unforgettable.
Oliver's avatar said at onepoint oh my gosh, this is so sad
.
I can see this dad sitting inhis home talking to this
artificial intelligence thinkingit's his son.

(03:41):
This is so disturbing andheartbreaking I can't even go on
and read any more of it.
If you want to go finishreading that, you can.
It's on my X feed, it's.
Oh, I wish, I wish Pat Gray andother people would cover this.
This is.
I wish bigger media would coverthis.
This is disturbing, quitefrankly.

(04:04):
Maybe I'm wrong, I don't know.
No, all right, moving on, let'ssee, let's do.
The National Park Serviceannounces it will restore
reinstate statues honoringConfederate General Albert Pike.
Good, more of this needs to bedone.
We do not need to erase ourhistory.

(04:26):
We have a history.
That's what makes us America,and if we erase it, if we erase
our history, we're no longerAmerica.
Uh, we don't have.
No one has the perfect history.
Okay, that's why it's history.
You learn from it and move onand correct yourself.
Okay, all right.
The National Park Serviceannounced.

(04:47):
I'm sorry.
The National Park Serviceannounced Monday that it will be
restoring and reinstating astatue of Confederate General
Albert Pike.
The National Park Serviceannounced today that it will
restore and reinstall the bronzestatue of Albert Pike, which
was toppled and vandalizedduring the riots in June 2020.
Boy, I tell you what.

(05:08):
2020 to 2024, it was just somecrazy shit, wasn't it?
The Monday announcement fromthe National Park Service is.
The rest are.
Wasn't it the mondayannouncement from the national
park services?
The rest are.
I tell you what we need to havea.
We need to have some history on20 to 24, somewhere that we
will never forget.
All right, so this is good news.

(05:29):
I'm glad we need more of it.
We need to do all of them thatwere destroyed and removed.
This is asinine that we evenremoved it to begin with.
All right, moving on the lastone here, kind of light-hearted,
I thought, oh boy, this isgoing to be good.
I'm going to tell you myresponse to it.
Saying this one simple phrasecan prevent arguments in your

(05:54):
marriage.
It works when your spouse isdriving you crazy.
My spouse spouse never drivesme crazy and I know I don't
drive him crazy.
Ha ha, really, my husband doesnot drive me crazy, but I know I
probably drive him crazy.
I just know I do, I just know Iam All right.
Sticks and stones can hurt, butthe wrong words can blow up

(06:15):
your marriage before you canspit out You're overreacting,
can blow up your marriage beforeyou can spit out, you're
overreacting.
Look my husband, we have never,really we've never argued as
far as like a shouting match.
We've had discussions, you know, but anyway.
So the good news is there's afour word phrase.

(06:36):
There's a four-word phrase thatcan supposedly stop a fight
before it starts, or keep youfrom snapping at your sweetie.
According to the writer RachelBowie, the lifesaver that can
stop your love from flatliningis as follows you ready, you
ready for it?
What do you think?
It is All right here?

(06:57):
It is Always assume goodintentions.
Now, so this is like, seemslike it would be totally out of
left field.
If you are having a heateddiscussion with your spouse
about whatever.
This seems like it would befrom left field, out of nowhere.
Always assume good intentions.
But I'm going to tell yousomething.

(07:18):
If the husband and I, the gentand I, were having a discussion,
an involved discussion where Iwas trying to prove my points
and he was trying to prove hispoints and we were like not
really arguing but just havingdiscussions, and he said this to
me it would work on me.
It would work on me big time.
He's done this before, caughtme off guard and I will start to

(07:42):
say something back.
My mouth will open, I'll take abreath and my mouth will open,
but then nothing comes out,because then I start laughing.
So this would totally work onme.
I want you to try it next timeyou're having a conversation
with your spouse.
That's kind of getting up there, and you always assume good
intentions.
Only you have to try it nexttime you're having a
conversation with your spouse.
That's kind of getting up thereand you always assume good
intentions.
Only you have to say it theright way.

(08:04):
Don't say it in a smart, aleckyway.
That won't go over.
Well, so say it sincerely, allright.

(08:26):
The reason this phrase workswhen your spouse is driving you
crazy is kind of obvious.
Bowie wrote.
She suggested thinking okay,before I blow my lid off,
perhaps there's more to thestory here.
Well, maybe, maybe not.

(08:50):
Maybe it was a hard afternoon.
Maybe the baby started cryinghalfway into a game of trouble.
Maybe my husband deserves a bitof grace.
I am so sorry about my stupidcough I've had to pause this
twice.
Now I don't know what ishappening.
All right, sorry, moving on.
It's not about avoiding conflictor conversation around tougher
topics.
It was irritating that our homewas a mess and that I stepped

(09:13):
on two Yahtzee dice.
Okay, I don't know, this islike going off course.
It's more about making room forproductive and thoughtful
conversation, reducing conflictand achieving an improved way
forward together.
My husband and I have come torely on the phrase in matters
large and small.
All right, I'm going to stopright there.
Look the husband and I.

(09:35):
We are older.
I'm 58.
He's 63, I think.
Oh dear.
We've been married for 17 years.
We've been around the block afew times with each other and
before we met each other, we'vebeen through some stuff together
and we're usually on the samepage about everything.

(09:59):
I mean, I think that's whatmade us come together to begin
with.
We are not opposites as far asphilosophy goes.
Now, we might be opposites inpersonality-wise, but as far as
philosophy, religion, spiritualthings, we are on the same page.
I think that helps a lot.

(10:19):
Okay, we need to move on to thequestion of the day.
Well, I think we're going tostick with this topic for the
question of the day.
What do you do to help tonedown a conversation with your
spouse when you feel like it'sgetting heated?
I'm sure you've had argumentsbefore and heavy discussions.

(10:40):
What have you done to help easethe discomfort in the in the
argument or discussion?
I tell you what my husbandneeds.
He cracks a joke if we're likegoing, if we're like getting in
a serious conversation and hecan tell I'm getting aggravated
with him, he he'll usually cracka joke and it works.
It just works on me.

(11:00):
They're like totally turningthe turning, the whole tone, and
it just works.
Okay, I gotta go.
Thanks for listening.
Love y'all.
Bye.