January 22, 2025 • 44 mins
Episode 138: The AHM crew debrief after Modi's milestone performances at the Beacon Theatre, attending an event for Jewish singles, and sitting shiva for someone near and dear to our hearts.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome to, and here's Modi.
Everybody welcome to, andhere's Modi.
We are in the studio, leo Vegahas joined us, thank God, and we
have Periel Ashenbrand.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Wow hi.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
We are back.
We are.
You know, just before thecomedy, just before the podcast,
we had a bit of Mashiach energy.
Leo and I were walking here onthe way from our trainer, stan,
and we said let's just pop inand get a cup of tea at the
comedy cellar.
And I went in there and Liz wasthere and right then and there,
(00:42):
mateo canceled all of his spots, so I took them.
I was going to just sit at hometonight.
And right then and there,matteo canceled all of his spots
, so I took them.
I was going to just sit at hometonight and I have three spots
at the Comedy.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Cellar Amazing.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
And then tomorrow I'm doing.
Jim Norton had to cancel aone-hour show that he does at
the lounge, so I got that.
And I was like thinking lastweek I didn't put in for spots
and now I got these spots.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
That's amazing.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
That's spots.
That's amazing.
That's.
That's mashiach energy.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
That's 100 mashiach energy it's mashiach energy for
me too, because I'm gonna comeand watch you for an hour
tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So that's fine, do I even have a 15 minutes I've been
doing.
I've been doing an hour and 15minutes.
I don't even know, you know oh,do you have only 15 minutes.
Yeah, yeah, I mean I'm sure youyes yes, all the new material
I'm like, not in the show doing,but like that I'm not doing in
the current tour, which, by theway, people need to understand
(01:29):
something the tour I'm on nowhas nothing to do with the last
special.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Yes, they do need to understand.
It's a brand new hour.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
It's different from what you've seen online.
We haven't even really beenposting clips of it online
because we want to save it foryou guys.
So whatever you think is theshow, it's not.
It's a new thing.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
And this is the show that you just performed at the
Beacon.
At the Beacon, three sold outshows.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yes, three sold out shows.
It was amazing.
I mean, well, I want to talkabout, like just before we do,
the Beacon, just like I was at ashiver.
I'm sorry and I was there forall the days and so I got a
whole bunch of fans that I gotto interact with and it's so
funny how they say to me youknow what bit you haven't done
(02:15):
lately, and they're saying it asif they're at every show, but
they're basically saying youknow what bit I haven't seen
online lately, okay, and they'llbe like whatever the, the
shiver bit or the or the marrysomeone younger bit, or the have
your kids with you late in lifebit or whatever the bit is.
(02:38):
They're like you know what youhaven't been doing lately and
they haven't seen a show like.
It's like you think they werecoming to every show.
You know it's so funny.
So just it's a reminder for usto post older stuff and let
people just to refresh it intheir feed.
Am I right?
And that's it.
(02:59):
So that's it, the Beacon shows.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Yeah, how are the Beacon shows?
I mean, I was there, so I know,but for you guys, both of you
you had your debut at the Beacontoo, miss Thing.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
I did.
I did introduce the show, allthree.
I don't even want to call itopening the show, because that's
not what I did.
I just come out, I do someannouncements, I make up one
joke and then I get off thestage.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
Okay, so it is opening the show.
You're not featuring, butyou're opening the show.
You're the producer and you'rethanking them for coming and
you're dropping a few jokes andyou're letting them see who I'll
be talking about later
Speaker 2 (03:38):
on, you're so cute.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Yeah, I'm basically the setup for other jokes in the
show, just like a visual setup.
That's a great actual way tothink about it, because he talks
about me in the show, but hejust hops right in and doesn't
really it's actually I don'tknow.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
maybe you thought about this, but I never really
thought about it like that andit's actually probably so great
for the audience to have thevisual.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Yeah, I think it's like a hook.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
It's like a visual hook.
It's great, it's an amazingthing, and he is the producer of
the show.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Right, yes, he is.
But even more than that, thereare a lot of producers that
don't get on stage.
Like he's also part of your act, so it's fun.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
He's thanking the audience for a show that he is
profiting from as well.
Yes, it's not like you know,he's producing the show.
I think it's very nice.
And then Elon Altman came on.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
He was great.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
He did a great job he killed it, he killed it, he
killed it, he's funny.
He's funny, he's funny and he'sa great hang for backstage and
it was surreal and you saidsomething that made me laugh so
much.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
You said they're not going to be able to get me out
of here oh, I was like how am Igonna three nights?
Speaker 3 (04:55):
what did we do right after the weekend?
What did we do?
Did we go to connecticut?
Speaker 1 (04:59):
we did shabbat.
I was like thank god we hadshabbat to look forward to.
What did we do shabbat in inconnecticut?
Oh, went to connecticut.
We've been spending a lot oftime in connecticut I I was like
thank God we had Shabbat tolook forward to on Friday.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Where did we do Shabbat?
In Connecticut.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Oh, went to Connecticut.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
We've been spending a lot of time in Connecticut.
I don't even know if we'vediscussed this.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Well, let's finish the beacon, though, but like
it's… so were you at all like alittle bit more… I mean, I know
you don't get nervous beforeshows, but like, was there like
anything that felt like?
Speaker 3 (05:23):
no, he doesn't get nervous, but I think he had not.
That he doesn't have this forall shows, but just like kind of
more of a reverence for whatwas happening as a new yorker
yeah, it is like a huge deal.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I spoke about it in the show that you know, I began
doing comedy five blocks downfrom where this Beacon Theater
is, in a room that sits 100people.
Oh, I love that.
And so here I am 30 years,literally 30 years later.
I'm at the Beacon with thethree sold out shows and my
mom's in the audience all theshows.
She was there, you know,looking for her people and
(05:58):
making sure they all know I cantell you something.
Wait, wait, wait.
Also, can we discuss everybodyon the line to get into the show
?
I had no idea, but every womanin my mother's age bracket is
telling the security I'm Modi'smother.
Oh yeah, we had some reports ofthat.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
We had some mother impersonators.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
We had some mother impersonators.
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
It's a security issue .
Speaker 1 (06:24):
It's a security issue .
It's a security situation.
My mom obviously came in theback door, came to the green
room, saw the elevator, tooksome waters and went to her seat
.
We took care of her like my mom, and she's not going to be
outside online, but every womanwho looks like her, that's kind
of enterprising on their part.
It's very smart.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
I am asking one of these women to please get in
touch with us.
If you know someone who hasdone this or something like this
, please send us an email.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Because it was a big line and they didn't want to go
online.
They came all the way to thefront and go.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm Lodi's mother.
That is outrageous.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
Yeah, and the shows started 20 minutes late, and not
because the people weren'tthere, because they wouldn't get
out of the lobby.
People were just talking in thelobby and so like, yeah, she's
like we're 80, 88% checked in,but no one's in their seats,
(07:18):
because they're all in the lobbyand they had to literally close
the lights on the lobby.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
But that was, but that was.
So, I went to two shows and Idid find your mother outside at
one of them, like getting herlike flock.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
She's always shepherding, yeah, shepherding
her people.
She's always shepherding people.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
And she said something else to me.
She goes.
I know you're not going to likeit when I tell you this, but
it's true.
You look better in person.
And then somebody else cameover to me and said that they
had heard me say that on thepodcast that Modi's mother said
that I look better in real life.
And she goes.
(07:57):
I'm sorry to tell you, but it'strue.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
How do you feel about that?
How do you feel about that?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
observation what does that tell you?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I don't know.
I mean, I feel like, you know,it's not a great thing.
I don't know, I'm not I'm notinsecure so like I don't care,
but I feel like it's not like agreat thing to say this, like
you can really give somebody acomplex, especially somebody
who's on camera all the timeright.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
your, your opening line needs to be good.
I witnessed one of the craziestthings, completely off topic
here we hosted an event for LoxClub.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Oh yeah, there's a dating app for Jewish singles
called Lox Club Cute.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yes, and I actually was at a wedding of one of the
people who were a couple thatgot married a.
Monica wedding.
They met on Lox Club and therewas this amazing little dinner
for like very 40 people, supercurated, at Shushu, one of our
favorite restaurants.
And Albert was there.
It was amazing, it was verynice.
(08:58):
And I will say in the datingworld, leo called it the
trenches, it's the trenches out.
Leo calls it the trenches, it'sthe trenches out there.
It is the trenches, it's trenchwarfare and between their hinges
and schminges and whatever thehell they're on.
And all these dating Couldn'tbe me.
The guys okay, the girls camein all seven, eights, nines,
(09:20):
even, all of them law degrees,all of them working, have their
own apartments and great guys,four, five, sixes, five sixes.
I'm gonna be, I'm gonna behonest with you but how much
money do they have?
they are not, not, not like thewomen.
I don't know all lawyers andwe're all by anyway and no, I
(09:40):
feel bad for the women.
It's like slim pickings outthere.
I feel so bad.
And then there was one, so wemet and we spoke with everybody,
kind of we just you know,nobody's Jewish, it's all Jew
they're all Jewish no, they'reall.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
They're all Jewish but the app is like for they
kind of market themselves asflexibly.
Okay if you're not Jewish, butmaybe yeah okay same, by the way
we're talking to people.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
And then this one one , a guy, we're talking to people
.
And then this one, a guy, we'retalking to him and he's a
lawyer and he's very sweet.
And I said you know what?
One minute, ariel, come over.
I call this girl, this womanthat we spoke to earlier.
And I said Ariel, this isMichael, whatever his name is,
say hi.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
And her opening line was was you have such pretty
eyes?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
that's what she says to him great opening line,
opening line.
And what does he say to her?
Well, my eyes aren't that greatthough they might look good,
but they're not great.
I had these contacts are very,very strong.
I have a stigmatism in my eye.
That was his torpedoed rightaway and I'm like, oh my god it
was crazy, I saw it, I saw it inreal time.
(10:48):
I couldn't believe that thatwas happening.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
It was just people self-sabotaging left and right.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
I would say to people at this event, like isn't there
anybody else?
Yeah, but they all know myex-girlfriend.
I'm like what.
And then it was.
It's harsh, you really.
Leo and I went home that nightand like just held each other
and then it was… what a mess.
It's harsh, you really….
Leo and I went home that nightand like….
Speaker 3 (11:07):
Just held each other.
Don't leave me, don't leave me,no, no, I'm crazy about it
Whenever someone says this is mysecond husband or my third
husband, I always look at Modiand I go first and final bitch.
There's no returning this.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
First and final which , by the way, if we're already
on this crazy topic, leo showedme.
You know, leo keeps me abreastof what's happening on the
internet.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Uh-huh.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
And so I do what's happening on the internet.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
What isn't happening on the internet?
The fires I don't know whenthis is airing, but probably
next week.
The fires were blazing in LosAngeles and I've been praying
and we've been hoping the besthappens for what happens out
there and people help each other.
And then he shows me this pageon Instagram of this gay couple.
(11:53):
Like they have millions offollowers and they decided to
make this about their divorce.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh yeah, they hard launched their divorce using the
Los Angeles fires, being likewe were kind of heading towards
this path anyway, and thenlosing our home really sealed
the deal.
I was like read the room.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
It was crazy Like narcissistic behavior Crazy
behavior.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
With like a full carousel swipey post that they
collaborated on oh my gosh, thatthey co-posted together
announcing their divorce a lathe thanks to the LA wildfires.
There's nothing to splitanymore.
There's no how.
So let's talk about this.
Everyone's saying LA wasburning because it's Sodom and
Gomorrah and God is mad at them.
But if it's splitting up thegays, maybe God has a plan.
(12:36):
No, no, no, that's not the I'mkidding, I'm kidding, I'm trying
to appeal to our religious base.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
I don't even know how to put that into my head.
The fires, obviously.
All we know this is one thingfrom Torah that you learn that
you don't own anything.
Whatever you have, you don'treally own.
It's all borrowing.
Anyway, you die, so it doesn'tmatter, don't take it with you.
And even while you think youown, so it doesn't matter, don't
(13:05):
take it with you.
Even while you think you ownthis, it's a gift, it's
something for you to have.
You worked for it, you made it,but it really it's on loan from
.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
This has been the Devar Torah of the day with Modi
.
Thank you for tuning in.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Oh by the way, that's not bad.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
That's not bad.
I'll give you Devar Torah ofthe day.
So we were okay.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
We left the beacons You're popcorning around all
over the place.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Is that okay though?
Yeah, go ahead, it's your showwe were at.
Dina's father passed away,rabbi Yisroel Yaakov Yoichal
Gross, of sacred, righteous holymemory, and I'm sure that also
has something to do with thefires, because when a righteous
(13:49):
person leaves this world, ittumbles it, things happen.
I'm not blaming the fires onthat, but it's a thing.
It's a thing.
The world lost a righteous man,and we were at the shiva, and
you know how I always throw outall this Torah stuff and it's
always from the wrong place andI mentioned the wrong names, but
(14:10):
I don't care, it's my podcast,and people always write no,
that's from Parsha's Vayetze,and whatever they say.
Someone loaded an app onto myphone where I could really now
just become a full Rebbe.
There's an app and it's calledSephora and you can punch in
(14:35):
like-.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
The makeup company.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
It sounds like it it's from Sefer, from book, and
you can punch in like what didAbraham say to Moses?
Moses and like pass the salt,whatever, like what you know,
whatever they, they, they haveit's probably just plugged into
chat gpt, I know, but like forme, that's a gift I can.
I can punch this in like underthe table and go.
(14:57):
You know, I believe it wasisaac that said to, to, uh and
then um.
So that was a funny thing thathappened to me.
This little app.
Everybody now he knows theentire Torah by heart.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
You don't need to oh, tell them about the, the,
whether it's kosher or not totake food from a shiva house
okay, we're gonna go into theshiva okay, we're done with the
beacon officially.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
No, we're gonna go back, but since we're on the
shiva, okay, okay, so like I'veback.
But since we're on the shiva,okay, okay, so like I, I I've
baruch hashem.
Thank god I've never had to sitshiva.
My parents are alive and, andI've never, we never had any a
family member other thangrandparents, and so I was like
a part of the shiva.
I was, I'm family, he was myadoptive father, dina's, my
sister, rafi's, my brother,we're family and I went there to
(15:43):
sit the shiva and luckily thehouse has not been redecorated
since 1980.
And all the chairs were thoselow chairs, so every house in
the chair was a shiva chair.
They had to actually bring inchairs that weren't shiva chairs
, those folding chairs.
And basically we learned onething there's only one law, and
that's bury the body as soon aspossible.
(16:04):
Everything else is just customor minhag.
A custom, a tradition, andtradition becomes law.
But you know, is it seven days?
When do you start?
Is it after the body's buried?
Before the body?
When do you start saying theprayer for the mourners?
And they had to bring him toIsrael.
Everybody had all kinds of,everybody knew laws and there
(16:27):
was one law.
I mean, I was just sitting, sonow we're just sitting there
Everybody's telling oh, you know, you can stop sitting shiva on
Thursday, you can.
Everybody had what to say.
Everybody had what to say.
My favorite one was this youknow there's extra food and
cookies and stuff and oh, pleasetake some.
So then someone said, well, youcan't take food home from a
(16:47):
shiva.
And then someone else said youcan if the person didn't die in
the house.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
There's always a loophole.
There's always some kind ofloophole.
There's always a loophole.
It's amazing.
The whole shiva was that kindof like.
People just like and you knowhow I have a bit about like the
shiva stuff yeah, this is soniche and specific.
You know, when you finish thevisit you say this thing and
(17:14):
it's a whole like, it's a word,it's like this little sentence
you say to the family and themembers People just say I'm
going to leave now, and they saythe sentence and then they go.
Some of them get up and theygive you the sentence and then
they give you a whole Dvar Torah.
So now here they are standingon top of you, You're sitting
(17:35):
almost on the floor and they'respitting up.
You know spitting.
So why did we say Hamakom andnot Hashem?
Why do we say the place on that?
Because it's the place in yourheart and they go on this full,
like you can know, that's theirDvar Torah, that's their words
of Torah, from whenever they goto a Shiva, like that's their,
they're gonna hit them with that.
It was anyway, but it was.
(17:59):
I felt the loss and luckily Ifelt it was happening soon and I
said to Leo I'm going down toFlorida before New Year's to go
see Rabbi Gross before he passesaway.
Wow, and Leo came with me.
Leo also got to see him.
I spent three days, like threehours a day with him and
(18:20):
completely there.
It was wow, it was emotional,it was spiritual, it was.
First of all, to spend timewith somebody right before they
pass away is insane.
I've had that, I've had threetimes.
I've had that, you know like,and it was just I'm so grateful
(18:40):
I had that moment with him,those moments with him before he
passed away.
And then he passed away.
I flew back down and we had theshiva.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
And you've known him since you were in college, known
him since 1990?
Well yeah, because you and dinabecame like best friends
immediately, right in collegeyeah, yeah, yeah and so you
immediately like, connected withher family yeah, no, right away
.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Oh, my god, immediately.
Yeah, I was like becoming moreand more religious.
He's this Hasidic, like dynasty.
I was like, yes, it was great.
And you know, and I, you know,I called him at the trips to
Kereshtia we did with him to thetown where he was born in,
where his great grandfather wasborn.
We were there twice with himand, and you know, think, three
(19:28):
beacon shows with him and, um,and you know, think, three
beacon shows yes, leo producedthem, but hashem also helped and
that was the end of present.
I, before every show, calledhim.
I would call him before everyshow and ask for a blessing, and
sometimes I'd forget to calland he'd call.
Oh, that's really great.
Moments like that happened inthere and, um, I'm so lucky to
(19:50):
have known him and be a part ofthis family and my parents loved
them and you know, my fatherhad, he gave him blessings and
it was, it was, it wasunbelievable, it was
unbelievable.
Yeah, um, the beacon shows.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Back to the beacon yeah what was your take on the
beacon, my take on the beacon um?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
where's that string?
Put the string away.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
It puts string oh, um , the beacon was amazing.
I, I.
It's always weird when you havesomething like that on the
calendar and you are workingtowards it and looking forward
to it and kind of like countingdown the days, and then, once
it's happening, you have to kindof like pause and just absorb
(20:38):
it all because it's reallyspecial.
It's like kind of like.
I remember I really vividlyremember us walking out of
Gramercy Theater the night afterwe shot your special and we
were just like that.
That did that just happen like,oh my god, like and you have to
like it's cheesy, but you gottastop and smell the roses, I
(21:01):
guess it's not cheesy.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
I think it's amazing.
I think it's.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
I prepared myself way before to enjoy every moment of
it.
So I wasn't like, let's getthrough this.
No, we weren't like, let's getthrough this, yeah, of course.
I was like I am going to savorevery minute of this.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
There was three nights in a row.
That was very helpful.
Could you imagine doing one anddone?
I can't imagine doing one anddone.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
You're good like that , like he likes to settle into a
venue, yeah, florida, we'redoing florida speaking of
settling into a venue.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
We have just added a seventh show at the parker
playhouse in fort lauderdale,florida, today.
This morning uh, january 14ththose tickets went on sale um
fourth.
Today is january 14th.
The tickets went on sale thismorning.
The show is February 4th anddon't confuse them.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
I was saying it today oh my god, that was clear
funniest story from the Shiva,I'll tell you back to the show
no, back to the Shiva interiorscene.
Shiva, I'm showing you apicture now of two hustards.
Maybe we'll post this when youguys edit this.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
On the AHM underscore podcast Instagram page yes, not
only creative directing our.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Instagram, so keep in mind.
I'm not in a shiva chair, butthis is the angle I had of
everybody in the shiva.
Do you see?
It's a picture of two chassids.
One of them has a plachkadebibahit, the big hat and the
shiva.
Oh my God, do you see?
It's a picture of two chassids.
One of them has a plachka debibahit and the other has a big
hat and a small hat.
We're going to post thispicture.
So they're there, and next tothem is sitting Rabbi Shmuel
(22:41):
Boteach's brother, who declaredhe is my ex-brother.
It's a guy.
They have a jewelry store downin Miami on 41st Street.
Of course, he's showing me thisWhatsApp chat of it's called
Guys of South Florida.
It's a gay group of guys thatlive in South Florida Jewish,
(23:06):
jewish, jewish Guys of SouthFlorida.
Okay, jewish Jewish guys ofSouth Florida.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
That's the name of the WhatsApp chat Gay guys.
It doesn't say gay on the title.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
This is with this rabbi's brother.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
No, no, no, leave that.
I'm just showing you thatpicture, but it's called Jewish
guys of South Florida, okay, andI think they're all gay and he
was showing this to me, and Ithink they're all gay and he was
showing this to me and he'sshowing me how, like how the
chat goes.
We tried to get tickets forModi's thing and then they
didn't get Modi's stuff.
And then he goes like does Leokeep kosher?
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I keep a kosher mouth .
Speaker 1 (23:45):
And then they're all like asking all these questions
about Leo.
Did Leo convert?
Did Leo not the wholeconversation about me and Leo
and the show?
And then he leaves and theseother two guys are showing me
another chat, another WhatsAppchat that's in Yiddish, showing
clips of me.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
I was like that's the show, duality of man yes, yes,
yes, it's for sure.
Duality of man yes, yes, yes,it's so fun.
Do we want to do like the AMAsor anything?
Speaker 2 (24:16):
like that.
Yes, but first I think thatwhile we're talking about
savoring the moment, maybe wecould also give a shout out to
our sponsor, you know what'sreally savory.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
What's savory A&H Kosher Hot Dogs or A&H
Provisions?
Yes, you can visit them atwwwkosherdogsnet for all your
kosher delicatessen needs.
If you input code MODY, you'llreceive 30% off of your first
order there.
Thank you, seth.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
We love you and your food's delicious.
Seth and I've had at the shiverother foods and you're on to
something.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
That's a good niche.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
There's also White's and Luxembourg, the law firm
that not only does well, they dogood, they're very
philanthropic.
White's and Luxembourg, we havegotten some.
We apparently have beenplugging the website incorrectly
so if you'd like to clarifythat white luxcom can you spell
(25:14):
that out for them?
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I can w-e-i-t-z-l-u-xcom.
Speaker 3 (25:21):
okay, I should have been doing that into the camera
yeah, but it's good, all Allright, we did our sponsors.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
We did our sponsors.
Okay, ama, should we talk aboutZZ?
Sure, we actually.
We went when we were in Floridabefore the rabbi passed away.
We told Arthur that we're there.
Arthur Luxenberg, he's like, oh, dinner tonight, this amazing
restaurant, it's like a clubrestaurant called ZZ's.
(25:47):
Never even this amazingrestaurant, it's like a club
restaurant called ZZ's nevereven heard of it.
Some of the most delicious foodI've eaten.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
It was quiet miso Caesar salad was life changing
next level miso Caesar salad.
I've never had it like how goodcould a Caesar salad be?
Speaker 1 (26:02):
it was, I would go back just for that wow yes and
it was me, leo Randy, arthur'swife Arthur, and another couple.
I'm not going to mention namesbecause I mean they would love
it.
But no, go on, no, I'm notgoing to mention their names.
Anyway, one thing Leo hastaught me since when we began,
(26:25):
you know, when we began dating,leo told me when a restaurant
we'd be in a dark restaurant andthe menu would come, I'd take
my flashlight out.
But he goes no, do not pullyour flashlight out at a
restaurant, just don't ever dothat.
And me and Leo are sittingthere with two couples that are
older than me.
(26:46):
They're all like 10 years olderthan me.
Speaker 3 (26:48):
Yeah, it was like if you had epilepsy at the table.
You were in trouble, Not onlydid the flashlights come out?
Speaker 1 (26:53):
they were holding them, like above.
The entire table can see what'sgoing on and they didn't care.
They didn't care, no.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
I also think it is necessary sometimes for some
people, like it is dark in thoseplaces.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
I was just saying like I'd rather read you the
menu than you do that so I said,I said yeah, but, but I now
take a picture of the of themenu and then open it up you
know.
Speaker 3 (27:19):
But what did I tell you?
Why not to do that?
Speaker 1 (27:21):
he said to me okay, so he told this to me at soho
house.
Soho house, orchard.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
He said Modi.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Look around, look how beautiful the lights are.
Somebody was paid a lot ofmoney to curate the lighting in
here, and now you're with this.
It's a whole thing, lightingdesign, and you're with this
light and it just focuseseverything.
It's like a lighthouse.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
Okay, but to be fair, you can be 100 feet away.
You're like whoa.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
I can't see the menu, Like I can't see.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
That's what the tea lights are for you.
Geriatric.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
And so what am I supposed to do?
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Take out, like my readers, and a tea light, that's
better Find a solution thatdoesn't involve putting a strobe
light on a table.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
So he's right, find a solution that doesn't involve
putting a strobe light on.
So just take a picture of thepart of the menu you want to
look at and have it flash, no,and then you open it up.
Like you know how you put yourthumbs together and you open up.
And you put your thumbstogether.
Yeah, you do it with your twofingers.
You know what?
Speaker 2 (28:16):
You don't even need to put your thumbs together.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
Yeah, and you can read what's going on in there.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
But if it's pitch black you can't take a picture.
It's already more lit.
You'll see it.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
You'll see just wait, give him a few years.
In like 20 years he's gonna belike remember, I'm gonna put on
glasses like a normal person.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
No, you're gonna do it on your regular glasses.
You're gonna carry your readerswith you, but whatever I need
to do.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
I want to talk about readers.
Have we not?
Have we discussed in thepodcast once?
I don't think so okay, soreaders is, is it's really
it's's a sign of how you feeltowards your spouse?
Readers, just so we all knowwhat we're talking about.
I'd love to hear that Glassesthat just are for when you read
something.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
They're magnifying.
They're magnifying.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
They're not prescription, just so you can
read right, Because I don't needglasses for anything except for
reading.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Oh, readers are by default, not prescription.
Speaker 1 (29:10):
I mean maybe they can be pers.
I mean maybe you can get sorry,they are prescription.
They're not a clear glass orreaders.
Are any glasses you put on toread okay, is it's it's glasses.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
It has a prescription in it no, but what does it say
about readers at like um?
Speaker 1 (29:22):
cvs like you can buy them.
Yeah, they have that thing thatturns around.
Or you can go get your eyeschecked like a human being and
and get a prescription and haveglasses made.
So now people that are withtheir couples and one of them
needs to have readers, so theybuy the $7 one over at Duane
Reade or Walgreens and it lookshorrible.
(29:44):
And now they're sitting therereading a newspaper or reading
their internet or readingwhatever, and their spouse has
to look at them.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
I don't think that's so bad.
I think it's horrible.
I love when you put on yourglasses.
You look so cute.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
Because I have cute glasses.
Right, but he doesn't have myglasses cost $700.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
The prescription thing Are you crazy?
Point taken.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
If you were looking at him in a pair of $4 CVS.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
And it's red.
Yes, the sides are red andthey're like crooked and they
have like fingerprints.
It's like saying to yourpartner I don't care what I look
like in front of you.
I've given up.
I've given up.
It's like wearing Crocs, yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
Hey, what Crocs are kind of comfortable I don't own
any.
Speaker 2 (30:23):
Balenciaga did a cute collab with Crocs.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
I'm just giving an example.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
And what you have, those yellow clogs of yours?
They're not, not Crocs, by theway.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Those are not Crocs.
Those are campers.
Those are a limited editionclogs.
Those are not Crocs.
Crocs, words are hard Anywaywhat I'm saying to you is show
your spouse, or whoever you arearound, a little bit of like I
(30:51):
care what I look about you andgo get.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Do I have to?
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Not even expensive.
Go to Warby Parker and get it.
Speaker 3 (30:56):
Is there anything I could be improving on?
Speaker 1 (30:58):
No, you don't wear glasses and you kill your.
Looks around the house areamazing.
You always have like matchingIn the house.
No one's coming in, he putstogether like matching outfits.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
I don't think I do that, you do.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
You guys are gay?
I'm not really sure, like I'mtrying to think.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
What does Guy wear around the house?
God knows?
Like a rat, Is it like no?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
no, I'm the one who's a rat.
He's like he's cute.
Speaker 3 (31:25):
You're wearing like a falling apart t-shirt and like
boxer shorts.
He's like will you?
Speaker 2 (31:29):
please, for the love of God, take a shower today.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
No really Meanwhile, Modi can't get me out of the
shower.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Leo is showering three times.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
So does Guy.
It's a disorder.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
That's why I'm so dry .
Right now it's winter.
I'm like still showering as ifit's summer.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
I don't mind showering.
Showering as if it's summer.
I don't mind showering.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
How often do you shower?
Speaker 1 (31:48):
I shower twice a day, at least once a day I shower
twice If I go to the gym orsomething, I come back.
But it's not even the showeringthat I love showering, it's the
aftermath the moisturizer, thehair, the this, all of that
stuff that you like or you don'tlike.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
No, he does a lot to start moisturizing your body.
Tell me about it and I have.
Yeah, it's.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yeah, the aftermath of the shower is harsh.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I don't think you need to shower in the winter.
Actually, why don't you guyslet us know how often?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
You already know how I feel about this.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
You feel?
Speaker 3 (32:17):
like I think we've talked about this when you live
in New York.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
City.
Before you go to bed at night,you might want to shower.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
You need to shower and get the city off of you.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
Got that greasy, grimy, gross, crusty, dusty,
musty on you.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
But what if you haven't been out and about?
You got that outside on you.
What if you haven't been outand about?
Speaker 1 (32:44):
You got that greasy grimy musty on you.
Wow, that just came to me nowthat is not bad at all.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
A memoir greasy crusty, dusty.
No, you didn't get it right.
I knew I wasn't gonna get.
That's gonna be the name of theepisode greasy, grimy, gross,
crusty, dusty, musty how do youkeep doing?
Speaker 2 (32:51):
that I don't know how do you?
Speaker 1 (32:52):
remember that?
How do you remember that?
Oh, my god um agree to disagreeagree to disagree fine because
you're crusty, dusty, musty it'sso easy to get a pair of nice
readers you know what he says tome.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
He goes oh, thank god , you're going to see modi and
leo today.
You're gonna take a shower, oh,my god, are you that gnarly?
Speaker 3 (33:12):
no, I mean, I don't think I don't think you're
gnarly, by the way, I actuallyrecognize that showering so much
is probably not good for yourlife.
It's not your skin microbiomeet cetera, et cetera.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
It's not.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
And your hair always looks better and healthier when
it's not washed.
Every day I get it.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
George Carlin has an amazing bit about over showering
, over cleaning and getting, andhe goes and washing your hands.
Every time you go to thebathroom he goes.
I only wash my hands in thebathroom if I crap on them.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
That's so disgusting, that is so funny that I
actually do.
Do I do wash my hands.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Speaking of washing your hands.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
I just want to talk about ASAP.
Yes, they're not paying us, no,but I want to give a shout out.
In a world where customerservice and brick and mortar
retail experiences have gone toshit, the last vestige of a
pleasant shopping experience isat your local Aesop.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (34:08):
They all are so nice.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
They let you try whatever you want.
They smell nice.
The lighting is considered.
They spray your bag with afragrance before you leave, so
when you take it home it smellslike the store.
It's like they've thought ofeverything.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
And the soap is $55 for hand soap, but it's lovely.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
It's worth it, though that makes me look forward to
washing my hands, though it alsomakes you look forward to going
to.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
When you walk by one of their stores, you go in there
and talk to them.
Speaker 2 (34:36):
I have to say that I also like to buy very expensive
hand soap, and it makes me lookforward.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
Do you like Molten Brown I do like Molten.
Brown, I like Molten Brown.
You don't like Molten Brown, Ido like Molten Brown I
absolutely do.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
There's a few scents of Molten Brown I love, I do
love A-Stop more.
Okay, scrappy Low is good, theLabo is good, the.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Labo the.
They make a soap.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
Yeah, yeah, they make a whole bunch of stuff.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
Yeah, I didn't know that this is.
I mean.
I think that we had our currentobsessions in a potential.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
Oh yeah, Current obsessions.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
ASAP.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
ASAP.
I mean, I know about it for awhile, but I just went into one
again the other day.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
My current obsession is the state of Connecticut.
I am obsessed.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
The problem with that obsession is that they can't
potentially come on and sponsorus.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Oh.
Speaker 3 (35:26):
Connecticut that'll be sure Do you have any retail
experiences at all?
I have.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
I'm totally obsessed with Trudon candles.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
See, I was about to say I feel like all of my
answers are scent-based, whichmakes sense because your sense
of smell is like the strongestthing tied to memory.
I'm very into like a diptychstore.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
You can't get me out of there a part of my name a
part of my name, besides being,you know, from the bible, from
the story of the book of esthermore the high, more is a scent,
is've told me.
The life.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
I love a store that smells good.
I love diptyque too but sorry,we have plenty of diptyque
candles in our Connecticut house, so now you can go back to your
Connecticut's an obsession ofmine.
I'm learning about it we boughta house in Connecticut and
we've been spending a lot oftime there, and we'll just sit
there in bed in the morning andjust absorb the silence.
(36:23):
So quiet, it's so quiet.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
It's so insane.
Speaker 3 (36:27):
Our apartment in the city is on the Lower East Side
and it is so loud.
It's sirens and honking andpeople yelling and screaming.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Door to door no traffic.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
Hour 40.
We leave after like a Broadwayshow.
We get in the car.
Car's fully packed.
Get in the car.
Hour 40, we're there.
We found this place at the endof the hutch.
It's called Chestnut Market orsomething.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Gas station.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
It's like a gas station that you can get to from
both sides of the highway.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
Brand new.
They redid.
I remember we were.
We were looking for a house inconnecticut.
We drove by this thing.
Speaker 3 (37:06):
I was like it was in construction stunning, gorgeous
yeah, like one of those nice gasstations oh, there's like every
kind of drink and every kind offood, and like and displayed
and nothing's empty, and theyhave these like uh cake.
Oh yeah, that's your currentobsession is those coffee cakes
from the chestnut.
Rest stop.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
Those of you who drive by a chestnut.
There's a coffee cake that theyhave in there.
It's not like a brand, it'slike I guess there's, and they
wrap it in like….
Speaker 3 (37:33):
Saran wrap.
Speaker 1 (37:34):
Saran wrap.
It is the most… it's like… itis pretty good, it's the soft
and then the hard.
Speaker 3 (37:39):
Do you think it's just Entenmann's that they're
repackaging?
No, nothing to do with.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Entenmann's, it's super soft.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
And then on top of, it is that hard crunchy crumb
the crumble.
Speaker 3 (37:51):
The crunchy crumb.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
And you have to eat it.
Listen to me, bring it to itsown paper bag.
Don't just open it and starteating it.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Put it in the bag.
Yeah, it's going to get it allover your car.
Speaker 1 (38:04):
Over the bag because it's going to crumble Because
it's all the crumbles and alsothe powdered sugar and you want
to enjoy it, you know.
So just that's how I eat it.
So, In the car, not in Publix.
Ever I'm not eat out of a bag.
They look like animals, yeah,but in the car.
That's our break on the driveup.
(38:26):
Get a coffee.
I get that cake.
We sit in the car for twoseconds and I eat it.
It's so delicious.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
And you don't like crash out from the sugar.
No, then I'm driving, I'mdriving, I just want to say that
you guys really had the rightidea with buying this house.
That was just like turnkey,because I am continuing to live
under a pile of wood.
Speaker 1 (38:49):
It's so funny.
On the way to the podcast, hereI get a text from Bob Kelly,
robert Kelly to call into.
Bonfire because Jay Oakersonjust dealt with a contractor who
was Israeli and so I call intothe, I'm right away on the
podcast and, like Jay, didn'targue with the price.
(39:11):
He's like whatever the guy gaveas a price, he was done.
I'm like, okay, did you offercash?
Like no, he goes Modi.
The guy is Israeli and Ibelieve I oversold our
friendship a lot more and hejust wants to meet you, and so
Whenever.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
I get to the discount .
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Whenever I get to the , I'll be happy to show up with
bagels and coffee for theworkers.
That is hilarious.
He's going to get like a 25%discount.
No, he's not going down.
That'd be pretty good, for sure.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
I don't know, you might be underestimating your
worth in certain markets.
Okay, all I want to tell you isI think I've mentioned this
before that, like I was on thistrip where I only was going to
work with Israelis, I know How'sthat working out for you.
Not well.
Not well, as I have noticed.
I have one Israeli man in mylife.
(39:59):
That's enough, two actually,and I'm all set, I am good.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
But I do wish Jay luck.
Wish Jay luck.
I wish Jay Oakerson good luck.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Oh yeah, He'll be fine.
He'll be fine.
It's great, and his wife is ontop of it.
She's.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Oh yeah, who's GCing this job of our house?
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
You're looking at her .
Speaker 1 (40:25):
What's GCing Overseeing?
Speaker 2 (40:27):
General contractor.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
You.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
Yeah me, Everything.
Guy has no idea what's going on.
All he does is like complainthat it's taking so long.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Well, you took that upon yourself.
That was like your own littlejourney.
Okay, well, sometimes we makemistakes.
What's?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
the timeline.
What's the runway for me herebetween now and you having a
normal house?
Speaker 2 (40:51):
Well.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Ari's graduation.
That's when I'll be able tomove.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
I decided that I want to convert the house to gas
from oil, and now so probablyabout six years years.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I don't know if you saw, but donald trump said that
that's the itchy heat what'sitchy, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (41:08):
There was some said you want to convert to gas or
from gas to gas?
Speaker 2 (41:11):
the house is good oil I have an oil tank the size of
this podcast studio I don't knowanything about how houses work.
Speaker 3 (41:19):
That's why we hired a house manager.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
Isn't it tired downstairs of like tubes and the
water softener and the heaterand the pump.
Speaker 3 (41:29):
And you can see here this pipe is.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
I thought you knew how to do this stuff.
Speaker 3 (41:33):
I thought you were handy.
He is very handy.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
He could hang a TV like no one's business but a
water softener, I can change alight fixture, I can do
everything A water softener.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
I will be calling you to come to Westchester.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
I'll send the guy we have.
We luckily found an amazing guythat calls up.
I don't have the energy tostart lighting.
He comes in.
He was made for it.
He comes in two seconds.
Oh, normando, normando.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
In three seconds he's all the light fixtures.
He's just throwing lightfixtures up left and right.
I was like, wow, he keeps hiscar running.
Speaker 1 (42:05):
because he does it so fast, he gets out.
Speaker 3 (42:07):
With a smile on his face.
Connecticut is great because wewent up there and you know the
house we bought furnished andready and whatever.
But like there were some thingsget done and we were ready, I
guess, because I guess we hadptsd, because our friends had
houses in the hamptons, we werelike, oh my god, what are these
like estimates gonna look like?
But it's connecticut prices thegod.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
The gardener says that.
The gardener says us we have tocut this branch off.
It's a giant branch, massivetree right and uh, and, and I
said okay, well, how much willthat cost?
He says it's 250, we're ready Iwas ready for $3,000 and we're
going to get three permits.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Come to where I am.
That's what it's like where Iam.
Speaker 3 (42:45):
Maybe we should stop talking because maybe my
invoices are going to startchanging.
Speaker 2 (42:48):
No.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
Normando.
He's amazing, they're great,it's really great.
That's Connecticut In.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
Westchester.
It's a nightmare.
Speaker 3 (42:56):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (42:57):
Just a nightmare.
Speaker 3 (42:58):
Westchester, westchester, westchester.
Speaker 1 (43:02):
How long We've been on, for a long time now.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
An hour.
It's an hour, less than an hour.
Do you want to wrap?
Speaker 1 (43:06):
it up.
Yeah, we'll wrap it up.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
Let's wrap it up.
Speaker 1 (43:09):
Oh my God, thank you for listening, thank you for
being fans.
We really didn't hit anythinghard, because that's Leo is
going to let you know where theshows are going to be.
Speaker 3 (43:19):
All right, I don't know when this is going to air,
but I'm just going to say we'rein Austin and Houston next week,
january 21st in Austin, houston, january 22nd and 23rd.
Then we're in Phoenix, arizona.
February 2nd.
Fort Lauderdale, florida.
We are there February 4th, 5th,6th, Then we go to Tampa
February 13thth, then we go backto Fort Lauderdale.
(43:40):
The 16th of February there's amatinee and a late show.
Then the 17th and 18th,february 27th we go back to
London for the Palladium for anencore performance at the
Palladium.
That show is sold out.
March 2nd is in Baltimore atthe Lyric Theater.
Still a chunk of tickets leftthere.
March 8th Las Vegas, nevada.
I've gotten lots of requestsfor Vegas, so there you go.
(44:02):
March 20th, los Angeles, at theWiltern Theater, hartford,
connecticut.
March 23rd, pittsburgh.
March 26th, buffalo, march 27th, and then we end things off in
Toronto.
March 30th and 31st.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Amen, and we're working on.
Speaker 3 (44:21):
European dates yeah, I'm going to have those soon.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
Anything you want to plug.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
Everything I'm doing is on my Instagram.
You can find me there Periel AtPeriel.
Speaker 1 (44:34):
Ashen Brand and be the friend that brings the
friends to the comedy show.
Get a few tickets for you andyour friends.
It's literally the easiest wayto create Moshiach energy.
Bring a friend to a comedy show.
It is just period, moshiachenergy.
Okay, and thank you all verymuch, and thanks to our sponsors
for being a part of today'spodcast.
(44:55):
Bye, bye, bye.
Welcome to, and here's Modi.
Everybody welcome to, andhere's Modi.
We are in the studio, leo Vegahas joined us, thank God, and we
have Periel Ashenbrand.
Speaker 2 (00:18):
Wow hi.
Speaker 1 (00:20):
We are back.
We are.
You know, just before thecomedy, just before the podcast,
we had a bit of Mashiach energy.
Leo and I were walking here onthe way from our trainer, stan,
and we said let's just pop inand get a cup of tea at the
comedy cellar.
And I went in there and Liz wasthere and right then and there,
(00:42):
mateo canceled all of his spots, so I took them.
I was going to just sit at hometonight.
And right then and there,matteo canceled all of his spots
, so I took them.
I was going to just sit at hometonight and I have three spots
at the Comedy.
Speaker 2 (00:48):
Cellar Amazing.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
And then tomorrow I'm doing.
Jim Norton had to cancel aone-hour show that he does at
the lounge, so I got that.
And I was like thinking lastweek I didn't put in for spots
and now I got these spots.
Speaker 2 (01:00):
That's amazing.
Speaker 1 (01:00):
That's spots.
That's amazing.
That's.
That's mashiach energy.
Speaker 2 (01:02):
That's 100 mashiach energy it's mashiach energy for
me too, because I'm gonna comeand watch you for an hour
tomorrow.
Speaker 1 (01:08):
So that's fine, do I even have a 15 minutes I've been
doing.
I've been doing an hour and 15minutes.
I don't even know, you know oh,do you have only 15 minutes.
Yeah, yeah, I mean I'm sure youyes yes, all the new material
I'm like, not in the show doing,but like that I'm not doing in
the current tour, which, by theway, people need to understand
(01:29):
something the tour I'm on nowhas nothing to do with the last
special.
Speaker 2 (01:34):
Yes, they do need to understand.
It's a brand new hour.
Speaker 3 (01:37):
It's different from what you've seen online.
We haven't even really beenposting clips of it online
because we want to save it foryou guys.
So whatever you think is theshow, it's not.
It's a new thing.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
And this is the show that you just performed at the
Beacon.
At the Beacon, three sold outshows.
Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yes, three sold out shows.
It was amazing.
I mean, well, I want to talkabout, like just before we do,
the Beacon, just like I was at ashiver.
I'm sorry and I was there forall the days and so I got a
whole bunch of fans that I gotto interact with and it's so
funny how they say to me youknow what bit you haven't done
(02:15):
lately, and they're saying it asif they're at every show, but
they're basically saying youknow what bit I haven't seen
online lately, okay, and they'llbe like whatever the, the
shiver bit or the or the marrysomeone younger bit, or the have
your kids with you late in lifebit or whatever the bit is.
(02:38):
They're like you know what youhaven't been doing lately and
they haven't seen a show like.
It's like you think they werecoming to every show.
You know it's so funny.
So just it's a reminder for usto post older stuff and let
people just to refresh it intheir feed.
Am I right?
And that's it.
(02:59):
So that's it, the Beacon shows.
Speaker 2 (03:01):
Yeah, how are the Beacon shows?
I mean, I was there, so I know,but for you guys, both of you
you had your debut at the Beacontoo, miss Thing.
Speaker 3 (03:11):
I did.
I did introduce the show, allthree.
I don't even want to call itopening the show, because that's
not what I did.
I just come out, I do someannouncements, I make up one
joke and then I get off thestage.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
Okay, so it is opening the show.
You're not featuring, butyou're opening the show.
You're the producer and you'rethanking them for coming and
you're dropping a few jokes andyou're letting them see who I'll
be talking about later
Speaker 2 (03:38):
on, you're so cute.
Speaker 3 (03:39):
Yeah, I'm basically the setup for other jokes in the
show, just like a visual setup.
That's a great actual way tothink about it, because he talks
about me in the show, but hejust hops right in and doesn't
really it's actually I don'tknow.
Speaker 2 (03:54):
maybe you thought about this, but I never really
thought about it like that andit's actually probably so great
for the audience to have thevisual.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Yeah, I think it's like a hook.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
It's like a visual hook.
It's great, it's an amazingthing, and he is the producer of
the show.
Speaker 2 (04:10):
Right, yes, he is.
But even more than that, thereare a lot of producers that
don't get on stage.
Like he's also part of your act, so it's fun.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
He's thanking the audience for a show that he is
profiting from as well.
Yes, it's not like you know,he's producing the show.
I think it's very nice.
And then Elon Altman came on.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
He was great.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
He did a great job he killed it, he killed it, he
killed it, he's funny.
He's funny, he's funny and he'sa great hang for backstage and
it was surreal and you saidsomething that made me laugh so
much.
Speaker 2 (04:49):
You said they're not going to be able to get me out
of here oh, I was like how am Igonna three nights?
Speaker 3 (04:55):
what did we do right after the weekend?
What did we do?
Did we go to connecticut?
Speaker 1 (04:59):
we did shabbat.
I was like thank god we hadshabbat to look forward to.
What did we do shabbat in inconnecticut?
Oh, went to connecticut.
We've been spending a lot oftime in connecticut I I was like
thank God we had Shabbat tolook forward to on Friday.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
Where did we do Shabbat?
In Connecticut.
Speaker 1 (05:06):
Oh, went to Connecticut.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
We've been spending a lot of time in Connecticut.
I don't even know if we'vediscussed this.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Well, let's finish the beacon, though, but like
it's… so were you at all like alittle bit more… I mean, I know
you don't get nervous beforeshows, but like, was there like
anything that felt like?
Speaker 3 (05:23):
no, he doesn't get nervous, but I think he had not.
That he doesn't have this forall shows, but just like kind of
more of a reverence for whatwas happening as a new yorker
yeah, it is like a huge deal.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
I spoke about it in the show that you know, I began
doing comedy five blocks downfrom where this Beacon Theater
is, in a room that sits 100people.
Oh, I love that.
And so here I am 30 years,literally 30 years later.
I'm at the Beacon with thethree sold out shows and my
mom's in the audience all theshows.
She was there, you know,looking for her people and
(05:58):
making sure they all know I cantell you something.
Wait, wait, wait.
Also, can we discuss everybodyon the line to get into the show
?
I had no idea, but every womanin my mother's age bracket is
telling the security I'm Modi'smother.
Oh yeah, we had some reports ofthat.
Speaker 3 (06:17):
We had some mother impersonators.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
We had some mother impersonators.
Yes, yeah.
Speaker 3 (06:23):
It's a security issue .
Speaker 1 (06:24):
It's a security issue .
It's a security situation.
My mom obviously came in theback door, came to the green
room, saw the elevator, tooksome waters and went to her seat
.
We took care of her like my mom, and she's not going to be
outside online, but every womanwho looks like her, that's kind
of enterprising on their part.
It's very smart.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
I am asking one of these women to please get in
touch with us.
If you know someone who hasdone this or something like this
, please send us an email.
Speaker 1 (06:51):
Because it was a big line and they didn't want to go
online.
They came all the way to thefront and go.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm Lodi's mother.
That is outrageous.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
Yeah, and the shows started 20 minutes late, and not
because the people weren'tthere, because they wouldn't get
out of the lobby.
People were just talking in thelobby and so like, yeah, she's
like we're 80, 88% checked in,but no one's in their seats,
(07:18):
because they're all in the lobbyand they had to literally close
the lights on the lobby.
Speaker 2 (07:23):
But that was, but that was.
So, I went to two shows and Idid find your mother outside at
one of them, like getting herlike flock.
Speaker 3 (07:32):
She's always shepherding, yeah, shepherding
her people.
She's always shepherding people.
Speaker 2 (07:37):
And she said something else to me.
She goes.
I know you're not going to likeit when I tell you this, but
it's true.
You look better in person.
And then somebody else cameover to me and said that they
had heard me say that on thepodcast that Modi's mother said
that I look better in real life.
And she goes.
(07:57):
I'm sorry to tell you, but it'strue.
Speaker 3 (07:59):
How do you feel about that?
How do you feel about that?
Speaker 1 (08:02):
observation what does that tell you?
Speaker 2 (08:04):
I don't know.
I mean, I feel like, you know,it's not a great thing.
I don't know, I'm not I'm notinsecure so like I don't care,
but I feel like it's not like agreat thing to say this, like
you can really give somebody acomplex, especially somebody
who's on camera all the timeright.
Speaker 1 (08:23):
your, your opening line needs to be good.
I witnessed one of the craziestthings, completely off topic
here we hosted an event for LoxClub.
Speaker 3 (08:33):
Oh yeah, there's a dating app for Jewish singles
called Lox Club Cute.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yes, and I actually was at a wedding of one of the
people who were a couple thatgot married a.
Monica wedding.
They met on Lox Club and therewas this amazing little dinner
for like very 40 people, supercurated, at Shushu, one of our
favorite restaurants.
And Albert was there.
It was amazing, it was verynice.
(08:58):
And I will say in the datingworld, leo called it the
trenches, it's the trenches out.
Leo calls it the trenches, it'sthe trenches out there.
It is the trenches, it's trenchwarfare and between their hinges
and schminges and whatever thehell they're on.
And all these dating Couldn'tbe me.
The guys okay, the girls camein all seven, eights, nines,
(09:20):
even, all of them law degrees,all of them working, have their
own apartments and great guys,four, five, sixes, five sixes.
I'm gonna be, I'm gonna behonest with you but how much
money do they have?
they are not, not, not like thewomen.
I don't know all lawyers andwe're all by anyway and no, I
(09:40):
feel bad for the women.
It's like slim pickings outthere.
I feel so bad.
And then there was one, so wemet and we spoke with everybody,
kind of we just you know,nobody's Jewish, it's all Jew
they're all Jewish no, they'reall.
Speaker 3 (09:52):
They're all Jewish but the app is like for they
kind of market themselves asflexibly.
Okay if you're not Jewish, butmaybe yeah okay same, by the way
we're talking to people.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
And then this one one , a guy, we're talking to people
.
And then this one, a guy, we'retalking to him and he's a
lawyer and he's very sweet.
And I said you know what?
One minute, ariel, come over.
I call this girl, this womanthat we spoke to earlier.
And I said Ariel, this isMichael, whatever his name is,
say hi.
Speaker 3 (10:26):
And her opening line was was you have such pretty
eyes?
Speaker 1 (10:27):
that's what she says to him great opening line,
opening line.
And what does he say to her?
Well, my eyes aren't that greatthough they might look good,
but they're not great.
I had these contacts are very,very strong.
I have a stigmatism in my eye.
That was his torpedoed rightaway and I'm like, oh my god it
was crazy, I saw it, I saw it inreal time.
(10:48):
I couldn't believe that thatwas happening.
Speaker 3 (10:49):
It was just people self-sabotaging left and right.
Speaker 1 (10:53):
I would say to people at this event, like isn't there
anybody else?
Yeah, but they all know myex-girlfriend.
I'm like what.
And then it was.
It's harsh, you really.
Leo and I went home that nightand like just held each other
and then it was… what a mess.
It's harsh, you really….
Leo and I went home that nightand like….
Speaker 3 (11:07):
Just held each other.
Don't leave me, don't leave me,no, no, I'm crazy about it
Whenever someone says this is mysecond husband or my third
husband, I always look at Modiand I go first and final bitch.
There's no returning this.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
First and final which , by the way, if we're already
on this crazy topic, leo showedme.
You know, leo keeps me abreastof what's happening on the
internet.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Uh-huh.
Speaker 3 (11:29):
And so I do what's happening on the internet.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
What isn't happening on the internet?
The fires I don't know whenthis is airing, but probably
next week.
The fires were blazing in LosAngeles and I've been praying
and we've been hoping the besthappens for what happens out
there and people help each other.
And then he shows me this pageon Instagram of this gay couple.
(11:53):
Like they have millions offollowers and they decided to
make this about their divorce.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh yeah, they hard launched their divorce using the
Los Angeles fires, being likewe were kind of heading towards
this path anyway, and thenlosing our home really sealed
the deal.
I was like read the room.
Speaker 2 (12:09):
It was crazy Like narcissistic behavior Crazy
behavior.
Speaker 3 (12:14):
With like a full carousel swipey post that they
collaborated on oh my gosh, thatthey co-posted together
announcing their divorce a lathe thanks to the LA wildfires.
There's nothing to splitanymore.
There's no how.
So let's talk about this.
Everyone's saying LA wasburning because it's Sodom and
Gomorrah and God is mad at them.
But if it's splitting up thegays, maybe God has a plan.
(12:36):
No, no, no, that's not the I'mkidding, I'm kidding, I'm trying
to appeal to our religious base.
Speaker 1 (12:44):
I don't even know how to put that into my head.
The fires, obviously.
All we know this is one thingfrom Torah that you learn that
you don't own anything.
Whatever you have, you don'treally own.
It's all borrowing.
Anyway, you die, so it doesn'tmatter, don't take it with you.
And even while you think youown, so it doesn't matter, don't
(13:05):
take it with you.
Even while you think you ownthis, it's a gift, it's
something for you to have.
You worked for it, you made it,but it really it's on loan from
.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
This has been the Devar Torah of the day with Modi
.
Thank you for tuning in.
Speaker 2 (13:18):
Oh by the way, that's not bad.
Speaker 1 (13:22):
That's not bad.
I'll give you Devar Torah ofthe day.
So we were okay.
Speaker 3 (13:27):
We left the beacons You're popcorning around all
over the place.
Speaker 1 (13:29):
Is that okay though?
Yeah, go ahead, it's your showwe were at.
Dina's father passed away,rabbi Yisroel Yaakov Yoichal
Gross, of sacred, righteous holymemory, and I'm sure that also
has something to do with thefires, because when a righteous
(13:49):
person leaves this world, ittumbles it, things happen.
I'm not blaming the fires onthat, but it's a thing.
It's a thing.
The world lost a righteous man,and we were at the shiva, and
you know how I always throw outall this Torah stuff and it's
always from the wrong place andI mentioned the wrong names, but
(14:10):
I don't care, it's my podcast,and people always write no,
that's from Parsha's Vayetze,and whatever they say.
Someone loaded an app onto myphone where I could really now
just become a full Rebbe.
There's an app and it's calledSephora and you can punch in
(14:35):
like-.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
The makeup company.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
It sounds like it it's from Sefer, from book, and
you can punch in like what didAbraham say to Moses?
Moses and like pass the salt,whatever, like what you know,
whatever they, they, they haveit's probably just plugged into
chat gpt, I know, but like forme, that's a gift I can.
I can punch this in like underthe table and go.
(14:57):
You know, I believe it wasisaac that said to, to, uh and
then um.
So that was a funny thing thathappened to me.
This little app.
Everybody now he knows theentire Torah by heart.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
You don't need to oh, tell them about the, the,
whether it's kosher or not totake food from a shiva house
okay, we're gonna go into theshiva okay, we're done with the
beacon officially.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
No, we're gonna go back, but since we're on the
shiva, okay, okay, so like I'veback.
But since we're on the shiva,okay, okay, so like I, I I've
baruch hashem.
Thank god I've never had to sitshiva.
My parents are alive and, andI've never, we never had any a
family member other thangrandparents, and so I was like
a part of the shiva.
I was, I'm family, he was myadoptive father, dina's, my
sister, rafi's, my brother,we're family and I went there to
(15:43):
sit the shiva and luckily thehouse has not been redecorated
since 1980.
And all the chairs were thoselow chairs, so every house in
the chair was a shiva chair.
They had to actually bring inchairs that weren't shiva chairs
, those folding chairs.
And basically we learned onething there's only one law, and
that's bury the body as soon aspossible.
(16:04):
Everything else is just customor minhag.
A custom, a tradition, andtradition becomes law.
But you know, is it seven days?
When do you start?
Is it after the body's buried?
Before the body?
When do you start saying theprayer for the mourners?
And they had to bring him toIsrael.
Everybody had all kinds of,everybody knew laws and there
(16:27):
was one law.
I mean, I was just sitting, sonow we're just sitting there
Everybody's telling oh, you know, you can stop sitting shiva on
Thursday, you can.
Everybody had what to say.
Everybody had what to say.
My favorite one was this youknow there's extra food and
cookies and stuff and oh, pleasetake some.
So then someone said, well, youcan't take food home from a
(16:47):
shiva.
And then someone else said youcan if the person didn't die in
the house.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Oh my.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
There's always a loophole.
There's always some kind ofloophole.
There's always a loophole.
It's amazing.
The whole shiva was that kindof like.
People just like and you knowhow I have a bit about like the
shiva stuff yeah, this is soniche and specific.
You know, when you finish thevisit you say this thing and
(17:14):
it's a whole like, it's a word,it's like this little sentence
you say to the family and themembers People just say I'm
going to leave now, and they saythe sentence and then they go.
Some of them get up and theygive you the sentence and then
they give you a whole Dvar Torah.
So now here they are standingon top of you, You're sitting
(17:35):
almost on the floor and they'respitting up.
You know spitting.
So why did we say Hamakom andnot Hashem?
Why do we say the place on that?
Because it's the place in yourheart and they go on this full,
like you can know, that's theirDvar Torah, that's their words
of Torah, from whenever they goto a Shiva, like that's their,
they're gonna hit them with that.
It was anyway, but it was.
(17:59):
I felt the loss and luckily Ifelt it was happening soon and I
said to Leo I'm going down toFlorida before New Year's to go
see Rabbi Gross before he passesaway.
Wow, and Leo came with me.
Leo also got to see him.
I spent three days, like threehours a day with him and
(18:20):
completely there.
It was wow, it was emotional,it was spiritual, it was.
First of all, to spend timewith somebody right before they
pass away is insane.
I've had that, I've had threetimes.
I've had that, you know like,and it was just I'm so grateful
(18:40):
I had that moment with him,those moments with him before he
passed away.
And then he passed away.
I flew back down and we had theshiva.
Speaker 2 (18:48):
And you've known him since you were in college, known
him since 1990?
Well yeah, because you and dinabecame like best friends
immediately, right in collegeyeah, yeah, yeah and so you
immediately like, connected withher family yeah, no, right away
.
Speaker 1 (19:05):
Oh, my god, immediately.
Yeah, I was like becoming moreand more religious.
He's this Hasidic, like dynasty.
I was like, yes, it was great.
And you know, and I, you know,I called him at the trips to
Kereshtia we did with him to thetown where he was born in,
where his great grandfather wasborn.
We were there twice with himand, and you know, think, three
(19:28):
beacon shows with him and, um,and you know, think, three
beacon shows yes, leo producedthem, but hashem also helped and
that was the end of present.
I, before every show, calledhim.
I would call him before everyshow and ask for a blessing, and
sometimes I'd forget to calland he'd call.
Oh, that's really great.
Moments like that happened inthere and, um, I'm so lucky to
(19:50):
have known him and be a part ofthis family and my parents loved
them and you know, my fatherhad, he gave him blessings and
it was, it was, it wasunbelievable, it was
unbelievable.
Yeah, um, the beacon shows.
Speaker 3 (20:05):
Back to the beacon yeah what was your take on the
beacon, my take on the beacon um?
Speaker 1 (20:16):
where's that string?
Put the string away.
Speaker 3 (20:18):
It puts string oh, um , the beacon was amazing.
I, I.
It's always weird when you havesomething like that on the
calendar and you are workingtowards it and looking forward
to it and kind of like countingdown the days, and then, once
it's happening, you have to kindof like pause and just absorb
(20:38):
it all because it's reallyspecial.
It's like kind of like.
I remember I really vividlyremember us walking out of
Gramercy Theater the night afterwe shot your special and we
were just like that.
That did that just happen like,oh my god, like and you have to
like it's cheesy, but you gottastop and smell the roses, I
(21:01):
guess it's not cheesy.
Speaker 2 (21:02):
I think it's amazing.
I think it's.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
I prepared myself way before to enjoy every moment of
it.
So I wasn't like, let's getthrough this.
No, we weren't like, let's getthrough this, yeah, of course.
I was like I am going to savorevery minute of this.
Speaker 3 (21:20):
There was three nights in a row.
That was very helpful.
Could you imagine doing one anddone?
I can't imagine doing one anddone.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
You're good like that , like he likes to settle into a
venue, yeah, florida, we'redoing florida speaking of
settling into a venue.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
We have just added a seventh show at the parker
playhouse in fort lauderdale,florida, today.
This morning uh, january 14ththose tickets went on sale um
fourth.
Today is january 14th.
The tickets went on sale thismorning.
The show is February 4th anddon't confuse them.
Speaker 1 (21:52):
I was saying it today oh my god, that was clear
funniest story from the Shiva,I'll tell you back to the show
no, back to the Shiva interiorscene.
Shiva, I'm showing you apicture now of two hustards.
Maybe we'll post this when youguys edit this.
Speaker 3 (22:13):
On the AHM underscore podcast Instagram page yes, not
only creative directing our.
Speaker 1 (22:18):
Instagram, so keep in mind.
I'm not in a shiva chair, butthis is the angle I had of
everybody in the shiva.
Do you see?
It's a picture of two chassids.
One of them has a plachkadebibahit, the big hat and the
shiva.
Oh my God, do you see?
It's a picture of two chassids.
One of them has a plachka debibahit and the other has a big
hat and a small hat.
We're going to post thispicture.
So they're there, and next tothem is sitting Rabbi Shmuel
(22:41):
Boteach's brother, who declaredhe is my ex-brother.
It's a guy.
They have a jewelry store downin Miami on 41st Street.
Of course, he's showing me thisWhatsApp chat of it's called
Guys of South Florida.
It's a gay group of guys thatlive in South Florida Jewish,
(23:06):
jewish, jewish Guys of SouthFlorida.
Okay, jewish Jewish guys ofSouth Florida.
Speaker 2 (23:09):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
That's the name of the WhatsApp chat Gay guys.
It doesn't say gay on the title.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
This is with this rabbi's brother.
Speaker 1 (23:18):
No, no, no, leave that.
I'm just showing you thatpicture, but it's called Jewish
guys of South Florida, okay, andI think they're all gay and he
was showing this to me, and Ithink they're all gay and he was
showing this to me and he'sshowing me how, like how the
chat goes.
We tried to get tickets forModi's thing and then they
didn't get Modi's stuff.
And then he goes like does Leokeep kosher?
Speaker 3 (23:41):
I keep a kosher mouth .
Speaker 1 (23:45):
And then they're all like asking all these questions
about Leo.
Did Leo convert?
Did Leo not the wholeconversation about me and Leo
and the show?
And then he leaves and theseother two guys are showing me
another chat, another WhatsAppchat that's in Yiddish, showing
clips of me.
Speaker 3 (24:06):
I was like that's the show, duality of man yes, yes,
yes, it's for sure.
Duality of man yes, yes, yes,it's so fun.
Do we want to do like the AMAsor anything?
Speaker 2 (24:16):
like that.
Yes, but first I think thatwhile we're talking about
savoring the moment, maybe wecould also give a shout out to
our sponsor, you know what'sreally savory.
Speaker 3 (24:26):
What's savory A&H Kosher Hot Dogs or A&H
Provisions?
Yes, you can visit them atwwwkosherdogsnet for all your
kosher delicatessen needs.
If you input code MODY, you'llreceive 30% off of your first
order there.
Thank you, seth.
Speaker 1 (24:44):
We love you and your food's delicious.
Seth and I've had at the shiverother foods and you're on to
something.
Speaker 2 (24:52):
That's a good niche.
Speaker 3 (24:54):
There's also White's and Luxembourg, the law firm
that not only does well, they dogood, they're very
philanthropic.
White's and Luxembourg, we havegotten some.
We apparently have beenplugging the website incorrectly
so if you'd like to clarifythat white luxcom can you spell
(25:14):
that out for them?
Speaker 2 (25:15):
I can w-e-i-t-z-l-u-xcom.
Speaker 3 (25:21):
okay, I should have been doing that into the camera
yeah, but it's good, all Allright, we did our sponsors.
Speaker 1 (25:26):
We did our sponsors.
Okay, ama, should we talk aboutZZ?
Sure, we actually.
We went when we were in Floridabefore the rabbi passed away.
We told Arthur that we're there.
Arthur Luxenberg, he's like, oh, dinner tonight, this amazing
restaurant, it's like a clubrestaurant called ZZ's.
(25:47):
Never even this amazingrestaurant, it's like a club
restaurant called ZZ's nevereven heard of it.
Some of the most delicious foodI've eaten.
Speaker 3 (25:51):
It was quiet miso Caesar salad was life changing
next level miso Caesar salad.
I've never had it like how goodcould a Caesar salad be?
Speaker 1 (26:02):
it was, I would go back just for that wow yes and
it was me, leo Randy, arthur'swife Arthur, and another couple.
I'm not going to mention namesbecause I mean they would love
it.
But no, go on, no, I'm notgoing to mention their names.
Anyway, one thing Leo hastaught me since when we began,
(26:25):
you know, when we began dating,leo told me when a restaurant
we'd be in a dark restaurant andthe menu would come, I'd take
my flashlight out.
But he goes no, do not pullyour flashlight out at a
restaurant, just don't ever dothat.
And me and Leo are sittingthere with two couples that are
older than me.
(26:46):
They're all like 10 years olderthan me.
Speaker 3 (26:48):
Yeah, it was like if you had epilepsy at the table.
You were in trouble, Not onlydid the flashlights come out?
Speaker 1 (26:53):
they were holding them, like above.
The entire table can see what'sgoing on and they didn't care.
They didn't care, no.
Speaker 3 (27:01):
I also think it is necessary sometimes for some
people, like it is dark in thoseplaces.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
I was just saying like I'd rather read you the
menu than you do that so I said,I said yeah, but, but I now
take a picture of the of themenu and then open it up you
know.
Speaker 3 (27:19):
But what did I tell you?
Why not to do that?
Speaker 1 (27:21):
he said to me okay, so he told this to me at soho
house.
Soho house, orchard.
Speaker 2 (27:26):
He said Modi.
Speaker 1 (27:28):
Look around, look how beautiful the lights are.
Somebody was paid a lot ofmoney to curate the lighting in
here, and now you're with this.
It's a whole thing, lightingdesign, and you're with this
light and it just focuseseverything.
It's like a lighthouse.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
Okay, but to be fair, you can be 100 feet away.
You're like whoa.
Speaker 2 (27:47):
I can't see the menu, Like I can't see.
Speaker 3 (27:50):
That's what the tea lights are for you.
Geriatric.
Speaker 2 (27:53):
And so what am I supposed to do?
Speaker 3 (27:54):
Take out, like my readers, and a tea light, that's
better Find a solution thatdoesn't involve putting a strobe
light on a table.
Speaker 1 (28:01):
So he's right, find a solution that doesn't involve
putting a strobe light on.
So just take a picture of thepart of the menu you want to
look at and have it flash, no,and then you open it up.
Like you know how you put yourthumbs together and you open up.
And you put your thumbstogether.
Yeah, you do it with your twofingers.
You know what?
Speaker 2 (28:16):
You don't even need to put your thumbs together.
Speaker 1 (28:18):
Yeah, and you can read what's going on in there.
Speaker 2 (28:20):
But if it's pitch black you can't take a picture.
It's already more lit.
You'll see it.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
You'll see just wait, give him a few years.
In like 20 years he's gonna belike remember, I'm gonna put on
glasses like a normal person.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
No, you're gonna do it on your regular glasses.
You're gonna carry your readerswith you, but whatever I need
to do.
Speaker 1 (28:38):
I want to talk about readers.
Have we not?
Have we discussed in thepodcast once?
I don't think so okay, soreaders is, is it's really
it's's a sign of how you feeltowards your spouse?
Readers, just so we all knowwhat we're talking about.
I'd love to hear that Glassesthat just are for when you read
something.
Speaker 2 (28:58):
They're magnifying.
They're magnifying.
Speaker 1 (28:59):
They're not prescription, just so you can
read right, Because I don't needglasses for anything except for
reading.
Speaker 3 (29:03):
Oh, readers are by default, not prescription.
Speaker 1 (29:10):
I mean maybe they can be pers.
I mean maybe you can get sorry,they are prescription.
They're not a clear glass orreaders.
Are any glasses you put on toread okay, is it's it's glasses.
Speaker 2 (29:18):
It has a prescription in it no, but what does it say
about readers at like um?
Speaker 1 (29:22):
cvs like you can buy them.
Yeah, they have that thing thatturns around.
Or you can go get your eyeschecked like a human being and
and get a prescription and haveglasses made.
So now people that are withtheir couples and one of them
needs to have readers, so theybuy the $7 one over at Duane
Reade or Walgreens and it lookshorrible.
(29:44):
And now they're sitting therereading a newspaper or reading
their internet or readingwhatever, and their spouse has
to look at them.
Speaker 3 (29:51):
I don't think that's so bad.
I think it's horrible.
I love when you put on yourglasses.
You look so cute.
Speaker 1 (29:56):
Because I have cute glasses.
Right, but he doesn't have myglasses cost $700.
Speaker 3 (30:00):
The prescription thing Are you crazy?
Point taken.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
If you were looking at him in a pair of $4 CVS.
Speaker 1 (30:06):
And it's red.
Yes, the sides are red andthey're like crooked and they
have like fingerprints.
It's like saying to yourpartner I don't care what I look
like in front of you.
I've given up.
I've given up.
It's like wearing Crocs, yeah.
Speaker 3 (30:19):
Hey, what Crocs are kind of comfortable I don't own
any.
Speaker 2 (30:23):
Balenciaga did a cute collab with Crocs.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
I'm just giving an example.
Speaker 3 (30:26):
And what you have, those yellow clogs of yours?
They're not, not Crocs, by theway.
Speaker 1 (30:30):
Those are not Crocs.
Those are campers.
Those are a limited editionclogs.
Those are not Crocs.
Crocs, words are hard Anywaywhat I'm saying to you is show
your spouse, or whoever you arearound, a little bit of like I
(30:51):
care what I look about you andgo get.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
Do I have to?
Speaker 1 (30:54):
Not even expensive.
Go to Warby Parker and get it.
Speaker 3 (30:56):
Is there anything I could be improving on?
Speaker 1 (30:58):
No, you don't wear glasses and you kill your.
Looks around the house areamazing.
You always have like matchingIn the house.
No one's coming in, he putstogether like matching outfits.
Speaker 3 (31:11):
I don't think I do that, you do.
Speaker 2 (31:12):
You guys are gay?
I'm not really sure, like I'mtrying to think.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
What does Guy wear around the house?
God knows?
Like a rat, Is it like no?
Speaker 2 (31:21):
no, I'm the one who's a rat.
He's like he's cute.
Speaker 3 (31:25):
You're wearing like a falling apart t-shirt and like
boxer shorts.
He's like will you?
Speaker 2 (31:29):
please, for the love of God, take a shower today.
Speaker 3 (31:34):
No really Meanwhile, Modi can't get me out of the
shower.
Speaker 1 (31:37):
Leo is showering three times.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
So does Guy.
It's a disorder.
Speaker 3 (31:41):
That's why I'm so dry .
Right now it's winter.
I'm like still showering as ifit's summer.
Speaker 1 (31:46):
I don't mind showering.
Showering as if it's summer.
I don't mind showering.
Speaker 3 (31:48):
How often do you shower?
Speaker 1 (31:48):
I shower twice a day, at least once a day I shower
twice If I go to the gym orsomething, I come back.
But it's not even the showeringthat I love showering, it's the
aftermath the moisturizer, thehair, the this, all of that
stuff that you like or you don'tlike.
Speaker 2 (32:00):
No, he does a lot to start moisturizing your body.
Tell me about it and I have.
Yeah, it's.
Speaker 1 (32:05):
Yeah, the aftermath of the shower is harsh.
Speaker 2 (32:08):
I don't think you need to shower in the winter.
Actually, why don't you guyslet us know how often?
Speaker 3 (32:13):
You already know how I feel about this.
Speaker 2 (32:15):
You feel?
Speaker 3 (32:17):
like I think we've talked about this when you live
in New York.
Speaker 1 (32:19):
City.
Before you go to bed at night,you might want to shower.
Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
You need to shower and get the city off of you.
Speaker 3 (32:23):
Got that greasy, grimy, gross, crusty, dusty,
musty on you.
Speaker 2 (32:27):
But what if you haven't been out and about?
You got that outside on you.
What if you haven't been outand about?
Speaker 1 (32:44):
You got that greasy grimy musty on you.
Wow, that just came to me nowthat is not bad at all.
Speaker 3 (32:47):
A memoir greasy crusty, dusty.
No, you didn't get it right.
I knew I wasn't gonna get.
That's gonna be the name of theepisode greasy, grimy, gross,
crusty, dusty, musty how do youkeep doing?
Speaker 2 (32:51):
that I don't know how do you?
Speaker 1 (32:52):
remember that?
How do you remember that?
Oh, my god um agree to disagreeagree to disagree fine because
you're crusty, dusty, musty it'sso easy to get a pair of nice
readers you know what he says tome.
Speaker 2 (33:04):
He goes oh, thank god , you're going to see modi and
leo today.
You're gonna take a shower, oh,my god, are you that gnarly?
Speaker 3 (33:12):
no, I mean, I don't think I don't think you're
gnarly, by the way, I actuallyrecognize that showering so much
is probably not good for yourlife.
It's not your skin microbiomeet cetera, et cetera.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
It's not.
Speaker 3 (33:25):
And your hair always looks better and healthier when
it's not washed.
Every day I get it.
Speaker 1 (33:28):
George Carlin has an amazing bit about over showering
, over cleaning and getting, andhe goes and washing your hands.
Every time you go to thebathroom he goes.
I only wash my hands in thebathroom if I crap on them.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
That's so disgusting, that is so funny that I
actually do.
Do I do wash my hands.
Speaker 3 (33:46):
Speaking of washing your hands.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (33:49):
I just want to talk about ASAP.
Yes, they're not paying us, no,but I want to give a shout out.
In a world where customerservice and brick and mortar
retail experiences have gone toshit, the last vestige of a
pleasant shopping experience isat your local Aesop.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
Wow.
Speaker 3 (34:08):
They all are so nice.
Speaker 2 (34:10):
Okay.
Speaker 3 (34:11):
They let you try whatever you want.
They smell nice.
The lighting is considered.
They spray your bag with afragrance before you leave, so
when you take it home it smellslike the store.
It's like they've thought ofeverything.
Speaker 1 (34:24):
And the soap is $55 for hand soap, but it's lovely.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
It's worth it, though that makes me look forward to
washing my hands, though it alsomakes you look forward to going
to.
Speaker 1 (34:33):
When you walk by one of their stores, you go in there
and talk to them.
Speaker 2 (34:36):
I have to say that I also like to buy very expensive
hand soap, and it makes me lookforward.
Speaker 3 (34:42):
Do you like Molten Brown I do like Molten.
Brown, I like Molten Brown.
You don't like Molten Brown, Ido like Molten Brown I
absolutely do.
Speaker 1 (34:48):
There's a few scents of Molten Brown I love, I do
love A-Stop more.
Okay, scrappy Low is good, theLabo is good, the.
Speaker 2 (34:55):
Labo the.
They make a soap.
Speaker 1 (34:57):
Yeah, yeah, they make a whole bunch of stuff.
Speaker 2 (34:59):
Yeah, I didn't know that this is.
I mean.
I think that we had our currentobsessions in a potential.
Speaker 3 (35:06):
Oh yeah, Current obsessions.
Speaker 2 (35:08):
ASAP.
Speaker 3 (35:08):
ASAP.
I mean, I know about it for awhile, but I just went into one
again the other day.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
My current obsession is the state of Connecticut.
I am obsessed.
Speaker 2 (35:20):
The problem with that obsession is that they can't
potentially come on and sponsorus.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Oh.
Speaker 3 (35:26):
Connecticut that'll be sure Do you have any retail
experiences at all?
I have.
Speaker 2 (35:31):
I'm totally obsessed with Trudon candles.
Speaker 3 (35:35):
See, I was about to say I feel like all of my
answers are scent-based, whichmakes sense because your sense
of smell is like the strongestthing tied to memory.
I'm very into like a diptychstore.
Speaker 1 (35:47):
You can't get me out of there a part of my name a
part of my name, besides being,you know, from the bible, from
the story of the book of esthermore the high, more is a scent,
is've told me.
The life.
Speaker 3 (36:02):
I love a store that smells good.
I love diptyque too but sorry,we have plenty of diptyque
candles in our Connecticut house, so now you can go back to your
Connecticut's an obsession ofmine.
I'm learning about it we boughta house in Connecticut and
we've been spending a lot oftime there, and we'll just sit
there in bed in the morning andjust absorb the silence.
(36:23):
So quiet, it's so quiet.
Speaker 1 (36:26):
It's so insane.
Speaker 3 (36:27):
Our apartment in the city is on the Lower East Side
and it is so loud.
It's sirens and honking andpeople yelling and screaming.
Speaker 2 (36:37):
Door to door no traffic.
Speaker 1 (36:39):
Hour 40.
We leave after like a Broadwayshow.
We get in the car.
Car's fully packed.
Get in the car.
Hour 40, we're there.
We found this place at the endof the hutch.
It's called Chestnut Market orsomething.
Speaker 3 (36:57):
Gas station.
Speaker 1 (36:57):
It's like a gas station that you can get to from
both sides of the highway.
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (37:00):
Brand new.
They redid.
I remember we were.
We were looking for a house inconnecticut.
We drove by this thing.
Speaker 3 (37:06):
I was like it was in construction stunning, gorgeous
yeah, like one of those nice gasstations oh, there's like every
kind of drink and every kind offood, and like and displayed
and nothing's empty, and theyhave these like uh cake.
Oh yeah, that's your currentobsession is those coffee cakes
from the chestnut.
Rest stop.
Speaker 1 (37:26):
Those of you who drive by a chestnut.
There's a coffee cake that theyhave in there.
It's not like a brand, it'slike I guess there's, and they
wrap it in like….
Speaker 3 (37:33):
Saran wrap.
Speaker 1 (37:34):
Saran wrap.
It is the most… it's like… itis pretty good, it's the soft
and then the hard.
Speaker 3 (37:39):
Do you think it's just Entenmann's that they're
repackaging?
No, nothing to do with.
Speaker 1 (37:42):
Entenmann's, it's super soft.
Speaker 2 (37:46):
And then on top of, it is that hard crunchy crumb
the crumble.
Speaker 3 (37:51):
The crunchy crumb.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
And you have to eat it.
Listen to me, bring it to itsown paper bag.
Don't just open it and starteating it.
Speaker 3 (38:00):
Put it in the bag.
Yeah, it's going to get it allover your car.
Speaker 1 (38:04):
Over the bag because it's going to crumble Because
it's all the crumbles and alsothe powdered sugar and you want
to enjoy it, you know.
So just that's how I eat it.
So, In the car, not in Publix.
Ever I'm not eat out of a bag.
They look like animals, yeah,but in the car.
That's our break on the driveup.
(38:26):
Get a coffee.
I get that cake.
We sit in the car for twoseconds and I eat it.
It's so delicious.
Speaker 2 (38:32):
And you don't like crash out from the sugar.
No, then I'm driving, I'mdriving, I just want to say that
you guys really had the rightidea with buying this house.
That was just like turnkey,because I am continuing to live
under a pile of wood.
Speaker 1 (38:49):
It's so funny.
On the way to the podcast, hereI get a text from Bob Kelly,
robert Kelly to call into.
Bonfire because Jay Oakersonjust dealt with a contractor who
was Israeli and so I call intothe, I'm right away on the
podcast and, like Jay, didn'targue with the price.
(39:11):
He's like whatever the guy gaveas a price, he was done.
I'm like, okay, did you offercash?
Like no, he goes Modi.
The guy is Israeli and Ibelieve I oversold our
friendship a lot more and hejust wants to meet you, and so
Whenever.
Speaker 3 (39:25):
I get to the discount .
Speaker 1 (39:26):
Whenever I get to the , I'll be happy to show up with
bagels and coffee for theworkers.
That is hilarious.
He's going to get like a 25%discount.
No, he's not going down.
That'd be pretty good, for sure.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
I don't know, you might be underestimating your
worth in certain markets.
Okay, all I want to tell you isI think I've mentioned this
before that, like I was on thistrip where I only was going to
work with Israelis, I know How'sthat working out for you.
Not well.
Not well, as I have noticed.
I have one Israeli man in mylife.
(39:59):
That's enough, two actually,and I'm all set, I am good.
Speaker 1 (40:06):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (40:07):
But I do wish Jay luck.
Wish Jay luck.
I wish Jay Oakerson good luck.
Speaker 1 (40:12):
Oh yeah, He'll be fine.
He'll be fine.
It's great, and his wife is ontop of it.
She's.
Speaker 2 (40:18):
Oh yeah, who's GCing this job of our house?
Speaker 1 (40:23):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
You're looking at her .
Speaker 1 (40:25):
What's GCing Overseeing?
Speaker 2 (40:27):
General contractor.
Speaker 1 (40:29):
You.
Speaker 2 (40:29):
Yeah me, Everything.
Guy has no idea what's going on.
All he does is like complainthat it's taking so long.
Speaker 1 (40:38):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Well, you took that upon yourself.
That was like your own littlejourney.
Okay, well, sometimes we makemistakes.
What's?
Speaker 3 (40:45):
the timeline.
What's the runway for me herebetween now and you having a
normal house?
Speaker 2 (40:51):
Well.
Speaker 1 (40:52):
Ari's graduation.
That's when I'll be able tomove.
Speaker 2 (40:55):
I decided that I want to convert the house to gas
from oil, and now so probablyabout six years years.
Speaker 1 (41:02):
I don't know if you saw, but donald trump said that
that's the itchy heat what'sitchy, I don't know.
Speaker 3 (41:08):
There was some said you want to convert to gas or
from gas to gas?
Speaker 2 (41:11):
the house is good oil I have an oil tank the size of
this podcast studio I don't knowanything about how houses work.
Speaker 3 (41:19):
That's why we hired a house manager.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
Isn't it tired downstairs of like tubes and the
water softener and the heaterand the pump.
Speaker 3 (41:29):
And you can see here this pipe is.
Speaker 2 (41:31):
I thought you knew how to do this stuff.
Speaker 3 (41:33):
I thought you were handy.
He is very handy.
Speaker 1 (41:36):
He could hang a TV like no one's business but a
water softener, I can change alight fixture, I can do
everything A water softener.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
I will be calling you to come to Westchester.
Speaker 1 (41:46):
I'll send the guy we have.
We luckily found an amazing guythat calls up.
I don't have the energy tostart lighting.
He comes in.
He was made for it.
He comes in two seconds.
Oh, normando, normando.
Speaker 3 (42:01):
In three seconds he's all the light fixtures.
He's just throwing lightfixtures up left and right.
I was like, wow, he keeps hiscar running.
Speaker 1 (42:05):
because he does it so fast, he gets out.
Speaker 3 (42:07):
With a smile on his face.
Connecticut is great because wewent up there and you know the
house we bought furnished andready and whatever.
But like there were some thingsget done and we were ready, I
guess, because I guess we hadptsd, because our friends had
houses in the hamptons, we werelike, oh my god, what are these
like estimates gonna look like?
But it's connecticut prices thegod.
Speaker 1 (42:26):
The gardener says that.
The gardener says us we have tocut this branch off.
It's a giant branch, massivetree right and uh, and, and I
said okay, well, how much willthat cost?
He says it's 250, we're ready Iwas ready for $3,000 and we're
going to get three permits.
Speaker 2 (42:43):
Come to where I am.
That's what it's like where Iam.
Speaker 3 (42:45):
Maybe we should stop talking because maybe my
invoices are going to startchanging.
Speaker 2 (42:48):
No.
Speaker 1 (42:48):
Normando.
He's amazing, they're great,it's really great.
That's Connecticut In.
Speaker 2 (42:55):
Westchester.
It's a nightmare.
Speaker 3 (42:56):
I'm sure.
Speaker 2 (42:57):
Just a nightmare.
Speaker 3 (42:58):
Westchester, westchester, westchester.
Speaker 1 (43:02):
How long We've been on, for a long time now.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
An hour.
It's an hour, less than an hour.
Do you want to wrap?
Speaker 1 (43:06):
it up.
Yeah, we'll wrap it up.
Speaker 3 (43:08):
Let's wrap it up.
Speaker 1 (43:09):
Oh my God, thank you for listening, thank you for
being fans.
We really didn't hit anythinghard, because that's Leo is
going to let you know where theshows are going to be.
Speaker 3 (43:19):
All right, I don't know when this is going to air,
but I'm just going to say we'rein Austin and Houston next week,
january 21st in Austin, houston, january 22nd and 23rd.
Then we're in Phoenix, arizona.
February 2nd.
Fort Lauderdale, florida.
We are there February 4th, 5th,6th, Then we go to Tampa
February 13thth, then we go backto Fort Lauderdale.
(43:40):
The 16th of February there's amatinee and a late show.
Then the 17th and 18th,february 27th we go back to
London for the Palladium for anencore performance at the
Palladium.
That show is sold out.
March 2nd is in Baltimore atthe Lyric Theater.
Still a chunk of tickets leftthere.
March 8th Las Vegas, nevada.
I've gotten lots of requestsfor Vegas, so there you go.
(44:02):
March 20th, los Angeles, at theWiltern Theater, hartford,
connecticut.
March 23rd, pittsburgh.
March 26th, buffalo, march 27th, and then we end things off in
Toronto.
March 30th and 31st.
Speaker 1 (44:18):
Amen, and we're working on.
Speaker 3 (44:21):
European dates yeah, I'm going to have those soon.
Speaker 1 (44:26):
Anything you want to plug.
Speaker 2 (44:28):
Everything I'm doing is on my Instagram.
You can find me there Periel AtPeriel.
Speaker 1 (44:34):
Ashen Brand and be the friend that brings the
friends to the comedy show.
Get a few tickets for you andyour friends.
It's literally the easiest wayto create Moshiach energy.
Bring a friend to a comedy show.
It is just period, moshiachenergy.
Okay, and thank you all verymuch, and thanks to our sponsors
for being a part of today'spodcast.
(44:55):
Bye, bye, bye.
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