Ask Lisa: The Psychology of Parenting

Having conversations with our kids about money can be difficult. So how do we set them up for good financial health? Financial expert Bobbi Rebell, author of Launching Financial Grownups: Live Your Richest Life by Helping Your (Almost) Adult Kids Become Everyday Money Smart, joins the Ask Lisa Podcast as a special guest. The conversation answers key questions from listeners, including: How do we get kids to understand the value of ...

The holidays can be both joyful and stressful. Being in close quarters with relatives whose political or social views are completely different from yours can make this busy time of year even more challenging. Dr. Lisa offers a plan to help families and their kids avoid conflict when possible and cope with any friction that does arise. She also lays out a game plan for how to talk with our kids about guests and relatives who don'...

A parent writes in asking for help for their teen who feels intensely anxious about going to school and interacting with adults outside the home. Dr. Lisa explains that the need to stay close to home during the height of the pandemic has made it hard for many young people to spread their wings now. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss the root causes of clinginess and separation anxiety and how those causes can differ depending on a child...

Grades can be a source of family anxiety and stress, and online grading portals can make the situation both better and worse. A dad writes in asking how parents and kids can better manage online grades. Reena explains that she gets pinged on email every time her kids' grades are posted and Dr. Lisa has surprising advice for parents in the same boat. Dr. Lisa explains the upsides and downsides of having access to online grades, ...

How should we talk to our kids about what it means to fall in love? Parents know how good it can feel to make a strong connection and be on the receiving end of affection, but we also want to shield kids from heartbreak. Dr. Lisa helps walks us through how we can talk with our kids about both the emotional and physical sides of love, while Reena asks key questions about how to deal with the fact that these conversations are often u...

How can we support kids who feel uncomfortable about the timing of puberty? A parent writes in asking what to say to a late bloomer who feels out of step with her peers. Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on what it means to reach puberty early - or late - and how this differs depending on gender. Reena and Dr. Lisa address whether there's such a thing as perfectly timed puberty, and how to talk about the changes that come with pube...

Do violent video games normalize violence? A parent whose son becomes more aggressive with his sisters after playing certain games writes in asking for advice. Is it best to pull the plug on games like Fortnite and Grand Theft Auto, even if they're important to a boy's social life? Dr. Lisa unpacks the research on how violent video games affect kids and offers guidelines to consider. Reena asks how old kids should be if the...

How do we help teens take ownership of their lives, especially if they are feeling overwhelmed by all that adults are asking of them? Dr. Lisa explains how parents can move from nagging teens to seeing themselves as teachers who help teens become increasingly independent. The conversation also details the important role of adults outside the home, and the one thing Dr. Lisa has seen transform even the most reluctant teens into youn...

How do you help a teen who won't stop smoking marijuana? When does a family need to step in? A mom writes in asking for help for her son who has been caught smoking marijuana both at school and at home. Dr. Lisa explains what parents should know about substance abuse, and Reena asks how best to explain the risks of marijuana to kids, especially in light of widespread legalization. The conversation also covers the concept of “se...

A parent who hates sleepovers writes in to ask if they are really necessary. Dr. Lisa and Reena weigh the social costs of not allowing kids to host or attend sleepovers and what parents can do instead. They also address the clear parameters that can reduce the downsides of sleepovers, raise concerns parents may not have thought of, and detail the kinds of conversations parents might have with their kids if sleepovers are going to b...

College can be incredibly expensive, so how should parents think about covering the cost? What do we say to our kids about what we can, or are willing, to pay? How do you make the most of 529 plans? Dr. Lisa and Reena tackle these questions and more with special guest Ron Lieber, author of The Price You Pay for College: An Entirely New Roadmap for the Biggest Financial Decision Your Family Will Ever Make.

Resources from Ron Lieber

Ro...

When kids get stuck or fall apart while playing sports, what should parents do? Dr. Lisa offers strategies for when kids lose their cool, and explains a key change in thinking can help kids manage when they make mistakes. She and Reena also discuss how to help kids appreciate the importance of being team players and the fact that kids rarely improve in sports they've stopped enjoying. Reena asks about whether we should push kid...

Friends are supposed to make you feel better, but what about when kids have "friends" who leave them feeling awful? How do you help tweens and teens identify when a friendship has become toxic and gracefully remove themselves without becoming socially isolated? Reena and Dr. Lisa discuss how to handle tricky friendships, how to help kids create distance without being hurtful, and how to make sure that kids don't have al...

After more than two years of pandemic-related disruption, there's a lot riding on this school year. But what do you do if your kid doesn't seem to care about grades or how things are going academically? How can adults get kids to self-motivate and without micro-managing? Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss how parents can get kids to take school seriously, what kind of support is most useful, and the most common mistake adults make ...

Dr. Lisa and Reena have an update. Join them live with your parenting questions this Weds, June 8th, 1pm EST on the @asklisapodcast Instagram live handle. 

Follow us on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn @AskLisaPodcast, @Lisa.Damour, @ReenaNinan

Check out Dr. Lisa’s website for more resources. 

Ask Lisa is produced by Good Trouble Productions.

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Dr. Lisa runs down the five things she believes parents should focus on in summer 2022. The pandemic narrowed kids' opportunities for growth, but there's now a lot adults can do to help children and teenagers catch up. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss advice that might seem counterintuitive - such as the importance of encouraging kids to take some risks.

Dr. Lisa’s Summer Resources

How should you respond when your kids are mean to you? What’s age-appropriate behavior and what should not be tolerated? Dr. Lisa and Reena unpack why kids lash out and what’s behind the outbursts. How do you know when hormones are the cause or when it’s something else? Dr. Lisa has advice on how to create a safe space for kids at home that allows them to work through their frustrations but also teaches them what’s acceptable in th...

How much should we shield our kids from risk? And how much should we go out of our way to make their lives more comfortable? Dr. Lisa explains the importance of fostering independence and encouraging our children to take safe risks. Reena asks if we should try to make our kids' lives easier when we can, especially given all that they have gone through in the pandemic. Dr. Lisa and Reena discuss how much distress we should allow...