August 21, 2025 • 38 mins
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What if your greatest setback was the seed of your greatest comeback? In this episode, Erin gets real about what failure actually means—and why it's often the doorway to the growth we crave most. From leading a senior living community to 100% occupancy just months after COVID, to being fired to , Erin shares her personal story of transformation, breaking down how mistakes, when reflected on intentionally, become our most powerful leadership assets.
Erin introduces the concept of Return on Failure (R.O.F.) and explores how leaders can flip failure from shame into strategy. If you’ve ever felt like you're behind, burnt out, or bouncing back from a loss, this episode is the roadmap to rise.
🔑 Key Topics Covered:
- Why failure and success aren’t opposites—they’re on the same path
- The mindset shift that turns mistakes into momentum
- Erin’s personal story of leadership loss—and bounce-back success
- How to own your leadership narrative (especially when it’s messy)
- Using failure to build confidence, emotional intelligence, and trust
- Why perfectionism is the enemy of growth in leadership
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
Did you know that the same yearthat I was asked to leave my
(00:06):
community that I dedicated 10years of my life to, I also led
that same community.
From 67% to 100% in just 13months, and that was literally
right after the lockdowns werelifted.
In this episode, I'm pullingback the curtain on how the best
leaders don't just survive theirmistakes.
(00:29):
They invest in them.
We are gonna talk about whyfailure is never final unless
you stop learning from it.
The difference between a goodmiss and a bad miss and how your
biggest face plants, your flopsor your failures can become the
foundation for your success.
(00:51):
I believe the FirmestFoundation.
Is rock bottom.
You're gonna walk away with realtools to help you debrief your
mistakes, to build resilienceand create unstoppable momentum,
especially if you're leading inthe high stakes emotional world
of senior living.
If you've ever felt like you'vefailed too hard to bounce back,
(01:13):
listen here, honey, this episodeis for you.
So let's dive in and dissect.
My biggest failures in my careerand maybe even my life.
Let's go.
All right, here we go.
I'm talking to you.
Sometimes I talk to this podcastand I feel like I'm talking to a
(01:36):
lot of people and I don't knowif that makes it depersonalized
or personalized, but I just wantyou to know that I'm talking to
you.
I am talking to you, the personwho feels like they're in the
gutter the person who feels likemaybe they're not even enough,
the person who's managingsomebody who is stuck in the
(01:57):
gutter and can't get'em out, orthe one who feels like, no
matter what I do, it's notworking.
I've been there, done that, andI still visit.
Here in this place.
What can we call this?
the island of doom?
Is that what we can call it?
I don't know.
(02:17):
But don't stay there.
Just be a visitor and let'slearn how to leave whenever we
want to because that's the thingwe can truly make a choice.
To stay on the island of doomwhere we don't belong, or to
say, I don't belong here.
I'm gonna pack my luggage thatserves me and I'm gonna leave
(02:40):
the rest behind.
That is the goal of thisepisode.
So walk with me here.
Think about the last time youfailed at something big.
Maybe you took a risk on a teammember that didn't work out.
Check.
Maybe you rolled out a newprogram that flopped check.
(03:01):
in our line of work, these typeof mistakes can feel like
personal verdicts, like guilty,I'm a failure.
Guilty, right?
But what if there actuallydeposits?
(03:21):
Into your leadership resiliencyaccount.
Here I go again talking aboutemotional bank accounts.
I love that analogy.
But what if we looked at myfailures or deposits into my
leadership resiliency account?
Because you know, you need tohave multiple accounts.
I've led communities whereoccupancy was on the line, like
(03:44):
where we had to grow.
We were at 55% occupancy, or wewere at 67% occupancy, or, we
weren't making any money, right?
I've led those communities.
I've led the communities wheresurveys destroyed us, where they
didn't go as planned, andfamilies were unhappy.
(04:06):
And I've also led communitieswhere the surveys went
brilliantly and I was so proud.
But in those moments of failure,in the rawest most vulnerable
moments, it felt like thefailure was something to hide.
And you just feel so naked outin front of everybody and your
heart is sinking and your mindis saying.
(04:29):
Here I go again, or I can'tbelieve this happened, or I'm
about to get fired, or I want tothrow up, or am I ever gonna be
able to do anything right?
Over time, I have learned thatleaders who grow the fastest are
the ones who get the highestreturn on their failures because
(04:52):
failures.
Are the quickest way to become asuccess.
And I think too often we havethis great divide where
failure's over here and successis over here and we're either
going to one side or the other.
We're not staying in the middleand we're not bringing the
(05:14):
failure over.
Closer to the success or thesuccess closer to the failure,
we're allowing a failure todefine us, but a failure doesn't
define us.
think about it.
How many times does it take toget something right?
A lot.
You know, I tell leaders all thetime to embrace the suck of the
first year because you're gonnaget a lot of things wrong
(05:36):
because you don't know thepatterns, you don't know the
routines, you don't know thepeople, you don't know what
drives your people.
these are big things you have tofail in order to get them right.
My husband has this saying yougotta go through the bad to get
to the good.
How true is that?
How true is you have to gothrough the bad to get to the
(05:56):
good.
So when most people separate thesuccess and the failure, they
think I'll succeed by avoidingmistakes.
But that's false narrative.
That's false.
Success doesn't teach youanything.
success will grow your ego.
And I have learned that your egois not your friend.
Unless you're in a moment likethe final seconds of a game and
(06:20):
you know that you can make theshot, or you're solving problems
and you know you've done it, andyou can pull from that success,
right?
That's when ego is your friend.
Ego is not your friend when allyou see is your success, because
without failure, there is nosuccess.
Without success, you'redefeated.
(06:40):
And that's important.
That's why you need'em together.
Too much success is gonna makeyou cocky, arrogant and
untouchable.
Unrelatable, right?
Too much failure is gonna keepyou down in the gutter, in the
ditch, not knowing how to getup.
But when you keep them close andyou don't judge yourself too
harshly for the failure, and youdon't think you're so good,
(07:03):
because of this success, youcreate humility.
Resiliency and tenacity.
that's grit.
That's grit.
I used to think that humilitywas living in my weaknesses, I
didn't wanna be cocky andarrogant.
So I decided that I'm going tobe very aware of my weaknesses
(07:24):
and really focus on them and potand sometimes try to make them
my strengths.
There are a lot of my, a lot ofmy weaknesses that are never
gonna become strengths.
And if I continue to work onweaknesses, I'm just going to be
average at something and I don'twanna be average.
I wanna be good.
True humility requires you tounderstand your weaknesses and
(07:48):
your strengths.
And to live in the middle.
You can't live up top on yourstrengths.
You can be aware of them and youcan be confident in them, But
you have to be aware of yourweaknesses and know to hire for
them and know to delegate themand know to value the people
that you do.
(08:08):
True humility.
Allows you to live in a balance.
if you're living too far in yourweaknesses, you are not
confident, and if you're livingtoo high in your strengths,
you're too arrogant.
True humility is understandingthe balance of weaknesses and
strengths, and knowing thatsuccess is going to be if I
(08:29):
spend more time in my strengths,strengthening them, and less
time in my weaknesses.
Because that's where momentum isbuilt.
And so if you're feeling like afailure constantly, it's
probably because you're onlylooking at yourself through your
weaknesses and you're strugglingSo start looking at yourself
from what you're able to doright?
(08:51):
And stay there for a littlewhile and keep the failures
close, because more than likely,you're able to do very well in
those strength areas because youfailed in them and you got
better.
So what is the biggest failurethat defined me?
I think at this moment, thebiggest failure is that I was
asked to leave the samecommunity twice by the same
(09:14):
company.
Now I don't think I've ever saidthat out loud for the world to
hear, and let me give you somecontext'cause I've worked
through the shame, but it makesme a little nauseous when I just
said that.
I worked for a nonprofitcommunity, a 64 apartment memory
care community.
And they sold, and at the sametime they sold, I was pregnant
(09:36):
actually with twins and rightbefore the cell date, I went
into early labor, like at 28weeks, and I lost our son
Tucker.
And our other son, Eli, was bornat 28 weeks, in two days.
Now, this was three weeks beforethe sale went through.
(09:59):
I knew weeks before that thisnew company wasn't gonna
transfer me over.
I knew it.
I could tell.
I knew it by the regionaldirector that they brought in,
and I knew it by some of themost.
Placating and patronizingcomments.
They talked to me about having ababy and I promised them that I
(10:19):
would be by the phone and stillbe able to do this, and they
were like, no, no, no.
You take care of your family andwe'll make sure that
everything's taken care of.
I knew that wasn't the case.
I knew it wasn't the case and Iwas right.
They did not transfer me overand that was devastating in that
time.
That was an adult trauma thattriggered a lot of things that
(10:41):
spiraled that the next 10 yearsof my life turned into amazing
miracles.
The highest of highs and thelowest of lows.
So from 2012 to 2022, seriously,I was surviving.
My life fell apart.
(11:02):
Why?
They, didn't choose me.
I don't know, but I know that.
Defining moment in my life wassupposed to happen for me.
It was because I wasn't able towork the way that my son's life
started.
He had to trach his first twoyears of life.
I wasn't gonna be able to work.
And so it benefited me because Iwas able to, to have
(11:27):
unemployment and, you know, geta little severance check.
when you look back at thesedefining moments in your life,
did they help you?
Yes.
Is that a failure?
no, but it felt like one, right?
Fast forward two years later, myson, his trach is out.
(11:48):
He's able to go into daycare.
He's doing well, and I get acall.
They need an executive director.
They fly me out to their homeoffice.
They apologize to me, which is.
in my opinion, very, very big.
Like, thank you, I appreciatethat.
And at that point in my life, Ineeded money and I didn't wanna
(12:10):
go back into senior living ifyou want the God's honest truth.
But I needed money and I hadthis other job interview, and I
wasn't promised a job.
I was promised a secondinterview, and here in senior
living, I almost promised thejob.
So I just took the job.
And they said to me, we don'twant.
What happened in the past, themnot choosing me, you know, in
(12:32):
like life's worst time losing achild and watching the other
child clinging to life, theydon't want that to affect the
future.
And at the time I wasn't veryaware.
I was still surviving and I justsaid, yes, absolutely.
I look back now and I had thebiggest chip on my shoulder
(12:54):
folks.
I'm gonna prove you wrong.
I'm gonna prove that you made abad choice.
That was my mentality and thatwas my mentality for the next
eight years.
Vulnerable point in a humanbeing's life, and then the
identity that you have for yourlife is taken away for no reason
(13:16):
that they didn't, except forthey didn't want you.
That affects you.
And my core trauma was neverbeing enough anyways, and that
community.
It went from 55% to a hundredpercent with a horrific state
survey score and in 18 months orless, and we ran a tight ship
(13:37):
and it was a excellentcommunity.
And now all of a sudden a newowner comes in and they don't
want me, like I was just.
Devastated.
Okay, now I go back to work andwe turn the community around in
18 months or less.
Hard work, but I'm proving apoint.
Lemme tell you something.
(13:57):
And I go in and I make my pointknown.
We grow the occupancy back up.
You know, we're in the 90percentile in 18 months or less.
I can't exactly remember.
I don't, obviously life washectic at that time anyways.
We're doing good.
I win some big fancy award.
The community's doing great,everything's fine.
(14:17):
But eight years later, they dothe same thing to me.
They tell me they can't.
They don't know how to supportme anymore How did we get there?
Like how did we get there?
I think about this all the time.
If you wanna know the truth.
How did I get to that point?
And it's because I allowed mymind to sit in the failure of
(14:44):
being let go.
I allowed my mind to stay in thesentence.
I'm not enough.
And that was the energy that wasinside of my body.
Now, just so you know, insidethe community was nothing but
love rainbows and Skittlesbecause I loved my job.
I loved the people.
I loved feeling the love.
(15:04):
I loved solving the problems.
I loved being people's hero.
I am passionate about it.
So when I talk about myself inthese moments.
It is strictly internal and upto the corporate office.
It is not inside the communitybecause if there's one thing in
(15:25):
my life that I'm proud of, it isbeing an executive director and
I was a good one.
I was not perfect.
And I have made that very known.
I have popped off on people.
I have made bad decisions.
I have not had surveys that weregood.
the list is long.
I'm not perfect.
But I was the version of myselfthat I love the most inside of
the community.
I kept success and failure veryclose, and I was very balanced,
(15:48):
and I genuinely and passionatelyloved working inside of a
community.
But I projected my own negativestories, my own hurt, my own
childhood, traumatic storiesthat started there and then the
adult trauma.
I projected that on to the homeoffice and I defended myself.
(16:12):
And when I wasn't seen withthem.
I got angry.
There was a lot of resentments.
There was A big divide.
And for a long time, becausesome of the surveys in Alabama
for that company wasn't great.
I was able to run that communitylike my own, like I owned it and
so some of that is my faultbecause.
(16:33):
I didn't connect with them thatway.
And They allowed it.
But then as the company gotbigger, they were trying to
scale.
I didn't know what that meant.
I found a way to survive in abig community that did not have
the managerial support that itneeded.
Like it really needed anexecutive director and an
assistant executive director.
(16:54):
And all I had was me theexecutive director.
I found a way to run it for itto make sense, but it wasn't the
way that the home office wantedit ran.
And so when they started comingin and trying to change
everything, that's when the endbegan.
And I look back at that now andI'm like, what were my driving
(17:16):
forces to resist such change?
I resisted change.
It was they had to term, theyhad to ask me to leave.
They had to do that because Irefused to give in.
I refused it.
So what were the three areas?
(17:37):
Like I think back and I'm justlike, okay, what caused me to be
so resistant to change the fearof failure, number one.
The fear of getting fired againfor doing something wrong
because I didn't, I didn't feelsafe.
I didn't feel comfortable withthem.
I didn't trust them.
And so if I had a hundredpercent occupancy, if I had a
(17:57):
good survey, my NOI was good.
Like all these things.
And I knew how to do that, and Idid it consistently.
So if I could just have thosenumbers high enough, I would be
safe.
But that's not true.
That's not true more thananything.
Companies want alignment.
And I think from a personalstandpoint, more than anything,
(18:18):
you need alignment.
And I'm gonna tell yousomething.
I was not aligned with thecompany, and the company was not
aligned with me.
So what you had was a gap ofmisery that could not move
forward.
Now, could we have had aconversation and tried?
Yes.
Could they have hired a coachlike I am?
(18:39):
Yes.
I hired a coach for me and mylife changed.
Because I realized it was thefear of failure that drove me.
The fear of judgment that droveme, the fear of rejection that
drove me, and those were myproblems.
Mine, there was no one else'sproblems.
the fear of failure.
(18:59):
What if I mess up the fear ofjudgment?
What will people think about me?
Because I worked really hard.
For my reputation, for all thosethings.
Like I worked hard for that, andthen they're just gonna take it
away, and then I'm gonna fail,and then I'm not gonna be able
to live up to the expectations.
I mean, I had a good community.
(19:20):
We were one of the best in thearea.
And then the fear of rejection,which is the core wound.
But see, when you have all thatenergy inside of you, you
attract it.
So I attracted a company whowasn't going to see me.
And because I attracted that, Ifought against it and I tried to
prove my worth, which doesn'twork.
(19:41):
Okay, so projection was theproblem.
It wasn't performance, it was myown pain projected on to people.
I thought they were thinkingwhat I was thinking.
They were thinking about me.
There's so many people, evenpeople I coach right now who are
(20:03):
struggling with occupancy, and Iask them this question, when a
tour comes in, are youautomatically thinking that they
know that your occupancy's lowand that you're having all these
struggles?
And the person looks at me like,I'm like these big eyes, and
they say yes.
And I'm like, that's not true.
They're not.
They don't know.
(20:23):
I mean, maybe some people know,but if they knew they wouldn't
be there.
So you have to be aware of whatyou're believing that other
people are thinking about you,but you're not a mind reader.
That's why awareness is soimportant When you are aware of
your own thoughts, of your ownstories, of what you are telling
(20:43):
yourself, and you can changethose, then the lens that you
look through becomes completelyclear.
I don't care about failureanymore.
I have worked through all theshame.
Anything you wanna know aboutwhat I did right or what I did
wrong, I have no problem tellingyou because I learned from it.
(21:05):
I learned from it, and thereforeI'm stronger because of it, and
I am humble and I have grit, andI'm resilient, and I know that I
can do anything I want.
And the other thing is, is Ihave spent, and let me tell you
this, if you've been terminatedor you're looking for a job
right now, I have spent so muchtime crafting a sentence about
(21:28):
why I was asked to leave.
That would be honest andaffirming and true, and other
people not to judge me the fearof judgment.
And how many times have I had touse that sentence?
I once, twice, three times, 10times, 15 times zero.
Nobody cares.
(21:49):
And actually when they find out,they're impressed.
Because I can tell them what Ilearned from it.
Failure is your biggest teacher,and is it failure if it worked
out in your favor?
I call it failure because I feltlike a failure.
Even though I wasn't a failure,I had a hundred percent
community.
(22:10):
I had three near perfectsurveys.
I have turned four communitiesaround from underperforming, 75%
to a hundred percent in fourmonths as a sales director, 67%
to 90 something percent as asales director, and then I
became the executive director.
55% to a hundred percent with astate survey score of 57 and 18
months or less with amazingteams.
(22:31):
And then this last communityafter COVID, we were at 67% and
we went to a hundred percent inone year.
That's not a failure.
That is a success story, but itwasn't enough.
And I think what I want you toknow more than anything.
Is that 100% is not enough.
(22:53):
Your growth, your mentality,your alignment, that's enough.
How you handle the hardproblems, how you have the hard
conversations, how you're ableto communicate, how you receive
people when they walk in, likethat's important.
How you protect yourself.
Bring this wall of defense up.
(23:15):
When people walk in and how youfight change, like these things
they matter more than a hundredpercent.
So a hundred percent isn'tenough, and your growth is more
valuable than the growth of yourcommunity.
Who cares what people thinkabout you?
if you're learning, you'regrowing, and if you're growing,
(23:35):
you're living and that'simportant.
Who cares if you fail?
What did you learn?
I thought in my small community,like showing my face again, was
I would much rather, I don'tknow.
It was nauseating, I'll just saythat, but showing my face again
(23:59):
and putting myself out there andgrowing was more inspiring and
earning respect from people thanI really thought.
And really all I was doing washealing me, showing up for
myself.
And that's the point, like howdo you turn?
This experience, a failure, amistake, a learning lesson from
(24:24):
a failure to a good miss, right?
A good miss versus bad miss,because not all failures are
created equal, So someone who'snot willing to learn from a
mistake is never going to beable to look at a failure and
make it a good miss versus a badmiss.
Not all failure is equal.
(24:45):
A good miss moves you forward,you adjust and you learn.
And a bad miss means that you'reexcuse.
You have all these excuses thatyou're not changing, you're not
growing, and you're just blamingother people and you're
defending yourself, right?
So a goodness is, I lost thesale.
(25:08):
And here is why, and you learn.
I didn't follow up.
I didn't get down to the keyreason.
I didn't ask what success was tothem, and I didn't paint the
picture.
I didn't connect fully, but abad miss would be they chose
the, the other community becauseit had a swimming pool or
(25:29):
because it had, betteractivities.
Something that you don't have,that's a bad miss.
What did you learn when youcommunicate a failure to
someone?
I was asked to leave a communitythat I poured my heart and soul
into.
But here's why.
It was the best thing that everhappened to me.
(25:50):
It stripped away everything thatkept me stuck in some very bad
thought patterns and negativeenergy, and it allowed me to
heal myself and make myself thebiggest puzzle to put back
together.
And my life is better because ofthat.
(26:10):
I learned from it.
That is the biggest return onfailure.
if you're trying to get to ahundred percent and you have a
few good months, and then youhave a few bad months, and you
realize.
These patterns are telling mesomething and you realize that
it's a very simple fix becauseyou looked at all the failures.
(26:33):
Who are we missing?
Why are we losing theseparticular prospects?
When you can realize that andmake adjustments that failure
taught you so.
My sales and marketing directorwasn't asking better questions.
If I'm not retaining top talent,I'm not asking better questions.
I'm not asking them.
(26:53):
I'm not connecting with them.
I'm not supporting them the waythey need to, or in the
interview, I'm not putting mybest self forward to try to
understand who in the interviewI actually need to hire and who
I don't need to hire.
And those failures teach you.
(27:14):
How to interview better, how tosell better, that I need to
introduce people on the tourbecause it connects the
community to the prospectbecause it adds value to the
people that are working.
It makes them feel a part of theprocess, like that's a good miss
(27:35):
when you study what's goingwrong and you learn from it and
you look for the patterns.
That's important.
Right, because you can continueto walk down the same street
with the same hole in it andfall in it every time.
Or you can choose to see thehole to walk around the hole or
(27:55):
go on another street altogether,right?
You have to be aware of theproblem that you keep hitting
over and over again becausethese patterns.
You're either missing it and theuniverse, God, a higher power,
whatever it is to you, keepsgiving you the same problem over
(28:20):
and over again until you get thepoint.
Sometimes it's you.
Sometimes you have to get out ofyour own way.
Sometimes you have to identifythe story, become aware of how
it's harming you, and rewriteit.
And sometimes you just have towork for more knowing that
you're enough.
And when you do that, everythingchanges and you start attracting
(28:43):
the people who are enough andwant to make you better.
And that is where momentum isbuilt.
And it all starts with you.
It all starts on learning fromyour failures, and it all starts
in understanding just howimportant failure is in your
life.
What is a good miss?
What is a bad miss?
(29:04):
You make that decision a badmiss is if you blame everything
and you never, ever reflect onhow you got there.
And how you can avoid that everhappening again.
Life is difficult.
Working inside senior living isdifficult, but if you want to be
(29:25):
good at it, you have to realizeeverything worthwhile is uphill.
Everything, every success ishard earned and hard learned.
and that is part of the process.
Nothing comes easy in thisindustry, so when you expect it
to be easy, you get discouragedand discouragement will stop you
(29:46):
from doing the right things tobring that momentum.
You do not create change if youstop planting the seeds of
momentum.
If you stop because you don'tsee any results, you are not
going to see the resultsimmediately.
Seeds grow in seasons, not inseconds.
(30:07):
Keep doing the right thing evenwhen you don't see the results,
because the results will comeand lemme tell you something.
Be ready.
Because when the results come,it's gonna be a lot.
And that's why the foundationthat you have is so important.
So embrace the hard, embrace,the heart of why rising after a
(30:30):
failure is so worth it.
Doing the deep work, doing thehard work, doing the personal
work because you influence yourcommunity.
Your energy influences yourcommunity, your thought presses,
influences your community.
Your communication influencesyour community.
And if you feel like it's notworth it, if you feel like it's
(30:50):
not valuable, if you feel likeyou're not valuable, no one else
is going to, you are important,and I don't care if you're the
executive director and thedirector of nursing, the sales
and marketing director, youaffect the team.
You affect the community.
A failure should never sit youdown and get you off the team.
(31:11):
You should think about it.
You should reflect about it, andthen you should learn from it.
That's the greatest return onfailure.
Embrace the suck, folks.
It makes the journey lessoverwhelming.
Stop fighting the discomfort andjust allow it.
Because there is so much hope onthe other side of it.
I promise the dip, right?
We talked about the dip before.
(31:33):
The dip is worth the climb.
It's where the treasure is.
So don't lay there and getdefensive and feel sorry for
yourself.
Learn from it.
Take stock in it.
It is worth it.
Okay?
We're gonna talk about.
Failure, obviously this episodeand next episode, I'm gonna
actually go through the tacticalways that you can learn from
(31:58):
your failure.
Actually someone that used towork on my team who was put in a
position of an interim regionaldirector or district director,
'cause this person was anexecutive director of another
community.
Anyways, details the sentencethat stuck out the most was they
(32:18):
don't know how to support youanymore.
And that sentence has, I mean,just lived in my head, rent
free.
Most companies don't know how tosupport the leaders who don't
feel like they're enough or lackconfidence in their own personal
selves or have a professionaland a personal growth gap.
That's so big'cause they're twodifferent people.
(32:40):
And when I invested in coachingfor myself, I invested$5,000.
So, you know, that wasnauseating for me, and it
changed my life.
It was the best money I everspent.
No one invested in me.
I did that myself, and I learnedjust how valuable coaching is.
A mentor slash coach, somebodywho.
(33:02):
Has no shame and we'll talkabout it all.
Somebody who allow creates thisgrowth environment and says to
you, you can say whatever youwant to mean.
I don't care.
I'm not gonna judge you.
I'm gonna help walk you throughit.
I'm gonna give you steps on whatto do to get you out of this
hole that you're in, whetherit's a operational thing,
whether it's a mindset thing.
What I am learning with myclients is that it's both.
(33:24):
The mindset is keeping themstuck in the operation piece.
It's confidence.
There is so much going on insideof your communities, you are
being pulled in so manydifferent ways that you can't
see straight.
That's what coaching andmentoring does, and that's why
I'm uniquely qualified to do itbecause I can speak your
(33:45):
language.
Both from the personalstandpoint and the professional
standpoint.
That's why I built the mentoringcompany.
That's why we created thecourse.
That's why we have the ED launchlab, and that's why I take
one-on-one clients for thatperson who wants to succeed, who
loves their job, but is stuckand doesn't know how to get out.
That's my specialty.
(34:06):
It's what I love to do.
And that's why you should investin yourself.
And now I do work with companiesand they pay for coaching for
their, for their associates.
And maybe your company will dothat too, but if they don't
invest in yourselves,'cause yourlife can get so much easier.
the clients that I have aresucceeding whenever they were
(34:31):
feeling like they were failingbefore and it wasn't true.
They just needed somebody elseto look at them and say.
You've got this.
Let me help you get out of yourown way.
Let me help you rewrite thestory that you're telling
yourself with the truth.
And then let's operate fromearning and being more right,
(34:51):
being more when you already knowthat you're enough.
That's called growth.
That's what I do and I love it,and I would love.
To be part of your journey too.
You can buy a course to earn5.25 NAB approved CEUs.
If you need administrator'slicense, you can join the new ED
(35:14):
Launch Lab, which is gonna startin September.
And I'm always available forone-on-one coaching.
And I am a keynote speaker atthe national Center for Assisted
Living, AKA in Cal Day inOctober.
And that in itself is enough foryou to say, if she can fail and
(35:36):
get back up, then I can fail andget back up.
It's taken a lot of hard work,but I'm so proud.
I'm proud to be on that stageand to talk about my failures
and to help leaders get out oftheir own way.
That's my new mission.
You.
Me and growing together.
(35:57):
we're gonna learn next week.
I'm gonna talk to you about realtactical ways to learn from
failure, right?
To make every failure a goodmiss and not a bad miss.
Every day you are balancingfamilies, regulations, emotions,
and operations.
You are going to fail, butfailure does not define you.
(36:17):
It's how you respond to thefailure that does.
So if you can learn, improve andreenter with a new perspective,
nothing is going to stop you.
Growth is the goal, influencesthe outcome.
With being enough as thefoundation, you've got this and
(36:38):
you are worth it.
So own your story so you cancreate your future.
See you next time.
Did you know that the same yearthat I was asked to leave my
(00:06):
community that I dedicated 10years of my life to, I also led
that same community.
From 67% to 100% in just 13months, and that was literally
right after the lockdowns werelifted.
In this episode, I'm pullingback the curtain on how the best
leaders don't just survive theirmistakes.
(00:29):
They invest in them.
We are gonna talk about whyfailure is never final unless
you stop learning from it.
The difference between a goodmiss and a bad miss and how your
biggest face plants, your flopsor your failures can become the
foundation for your success.
(00:51):
I believe the FirmestFoundation.
Is rock bottom.
You're gonna walk away with realtools to help you debrief your
mistakes, to build resilienceand create unstoppable momentum,
especially if you're leading inthe high stakes emotional world
of senior living.
If you've ever felt like you'vefailed too hard to bounce back,
(01:13):
listen here, honey, this episodeis for you.
So let's dive in and dissect.
My biggest failures in my careerand maybe even my life.
Let's go.
All right, here we go.
I'm talking to you.
Sometimes I talk to this podcastand I feel like I'm talking to a
(01:36):
lot of people and I don't knowif that makes it depersonalized
or personalized, but I just wantyou to know that I'm talking to
you.
I am talking to you, the personwho feels like they're in the
gutter the person who feels likemaybe they're not even enough,
the person who's managingsomebody who is stuck in the
(01:57):
gutter and can't get'em out, orthe one who feels like, no
matter what I do, it's notworking.
I've been there, done that, andI still visit.
Here in this place.
What can we call this?
the island of doom?
Is that what we can call it?
I don't know.
(02:17):
But don't stay there.
Just be a visitor and let'slearn how to leave whenever we
want to because that's the thingwe can truly make a choice.
To stay on the island of doomwhere we don't belong, or to
say, I don't belong here.
I'm gonna pack my luggage thatserves me and I'm gonna leave
(02:40):
the rest behind.
That is the goal of thisepisode.
So walk with me here.
Think about the last time youfailed at something big.
Maybe you took a risk on a teammember that didn't work out.
Check.
Maybe you rolled out a newprogram that flopped check.
(03:01):
in our line of work, these typeof mistakes can feel like
personal verdicts, like guilty,I'm a failure.
Guilty, right?
But what if there actuallydeposits?
(03:21):
Into your leadership resiliencyaccount.
Here I go again talking aboutemotional bank accounts.
I love that analogy.
But what if we looked at myfailures or deposits into my
leadership resiliency account?
Because you know, you need tohave multiple accounts.
I've led communities whereoccupancy was on the line, like
(03:44):
where we had to grow.
We were at 55% occupancy, or wewere at 67% occupancy, or, we
weren't making any money, right?
I've led those communities.
I've led the communities wheresurveys destroyed us, where they
didn't go as planned, andfamilies were unhappy.
(04:06):
And I've also led communitieswhere the surveys went
brilliantly and I was so proud.
But in those moments of failure,in the rawest most vulnerable
moments, it felt like thefailure was something to hide.
And you just feel so naked outin front of everybody and your
heart is sinking and your mindis saying.
(04:29):
Here I go again, or I can'tbelieve this happened, or I'm
about to get fired, or I want tothrow up, or am I ever gonna be
able to do anything right?
Over time, I have learned thatleaders who grow the fastest are
the ones who get the highestreturn on their failures because
(04:52):
failures.
Are the quickest way to become asuccess.
And I think too often we havethis great divide where
failure's over here and successis over here and we're either
going to one side or the other.
We're not staying in the middleand we're not bringing the
(05:14):
failure over.
Closer to the success or thesuccess closer to the failure,
we're allowing a failure todefine us, but a failure doesn't
define us.
think about it.
How many times does it take toget something right?
A lot.
You know, I tell leaders all thetime to embrace the suck of the
first year because you're gonnaget a lot of things wrong
(05:36):
because you don't know thepatterns, you don't know the
routines, you don't know thepeople, you don't know what
drives your people.
these are big things you have tofail in order to get them right.
My husband has this saying yougotta go through the bad to get
to the good.
How true is that?
How true is you have to gothrough the bad to get to the
(05:56):
good.
So when most people separate thesuccess and the failure, they
think I'll succeed by avoidingmistakes.
But that's false narrative.
That's false.
Success doesn't teach youanything.
success will grow your ego.
And I have learned that your egois not your friend.
Unless you're in a moment likethe final seconds of a game and
(06:20):
you know that you can make theshot, or you're solving problems
and you know you've done it, andyou can pull from that success,
right?
That's when ego is your friend.
Ego is not your friend when allyou see is your success, because
without failure, there is nosuccess.
Without success, you'redefeated.
(06:40):
And that's important.
That's why you need'em together.
Too much success is gonna makeyou cocky, arrogant and
untouchable.
Unrelatable, right?
Too much failure is gonna keepyou down in the gutter, in the
ditch, not knowing how to getup.
But when you keep them close andyou don't judge yourself too
harshly for the failure, and youdon't think you're so good,
(07:03):
because of this success, youcreate humility.
Resiliency and tenacity.
that's grit.
That's grit.
I used to think that humilitywas living in my weaknesses, I
didn't wanna be cocky andarrogant.
So I decided that I'm going tobe very aware of my weaknesses
(07:24):
and really focus on them and potand sometimes try to make them
my strengths.
There are a lot of my, a lot ofmy weaknesses that are never
gonna become strengths.
And if I continue to work onweaknesses, I'm just going to be
average at something and I don'twanna be average.
I wanna be good.
True humility requires you tounderstand your weaknesses and
(07:48):
your strengths.
And to live in the middle.
You can't live up top on yourstrengths.
You can be aware of them and youcan be confident in them, But
you have to be aware of yourweaknesses and know to hire for
them and know to delegate themand know to value the people
that you do.
(08:08):
True humility.
Allows you to live in a balance.
if you're living too far in yourweaknesses, you are not
confident, and if you're livingtoo high in your strengths,
you're too arrogant.
True humility is understandingthe balance of weaknesses and
strengths, and knowing thatsuccess is going to be if I
(08:29):
spend more time in my strengths,strengthening them, and less
time in my weaknesses.
Because that's where momentum isbuilt.
And so if you're feeling like afailure constantly, it's
probably because you're onlylooking at yourself through your
weaknesses and you're strugglingSo start looking at yourself
from what you're able to doright?
(08:51):
And stay there for a littlewhile and keep the failures
close, because more than likely,you're able to do very well in
those strength areas because youfailed in them and you got
better.
So what is the biggest failurethat defined me?
I think at this moment, thebiggest failure is that I was
asked to leave the samecommunity twice by the same
(09:14):
company.
Now I don't think I've ever saidthat out loud for the world to
hear, and let me give you somecontext'cause I've worked
through the shame, but it makesme a little nauseous when I just
said that.
I worked for a nonprofitcommunity, a 64 apartment memory
care community.
And they sold, and at the sametime they sold, I was pregnant
(09:36):
actually with twins and rightbefore the cell date, I went
into early labor, like at 28weeks, and I lost our son
Tucker.
And our other son, Eli, was bornat 28 weeks, in two days.
Now, this was three weeks beforethe sale went through.
(09:59):
I knew weeks before that thisnew company wasn't gonna
transfer me over.
I knew it.
I could tell.
I knew it by the regionaldirector that they brought in,
and I knew it by some of themost.
Placating and patronizingcomments.
They talked to me about having ababy and I promised them that I
(10:19):
would be by the phone and stillbe able to do this, and they
were like, no, no, no.
You take care of your family andwe'll make sure that
everything's taken care of.
I knew that wasn't the case.
I knew it wasn't the case and Iwas right.
They did not transfer me overand that was devastating in that
time.
That was an adult trauma thattriggered a lot of things that
(10:41):
spiraled that the next 10 yearsof my life turned into amazing
miracles.
The highest of highs and thelowest of lows.
So from 2012 to 2022, seriously,I was surviving.
My life fell apart.
(11:02):
Why?
They, didn't choose me.
I don't know, but I know that.
Defining moment in my life wassupposed to happen for me.
It was because I wasn't able towork the way that my son's life
started.
He had to trach his first twoyears of life.
I wasn't gonna be able to work.
And so it benefited me because Iwas able to, to have
(11:27):
unemployment and, you know, geta little severance check.
when you look back at thesedefining moments in your life,
did they help you?
Yes.
Is that a failure?
no, but it felt like one, right?
Fast forward two years later, myson, his trach is out.
(11:48):
He's able to go into daycare.
He's doing well, and I get acall.
They need an executive director.
They fly me out to their homeoffice.
They apologize to me, which is.
in my opinion, very, very big.
Like, thank you, I appreciatethat.
And at that point in my life, Ineeded money and I didn't wanna
(12:10):
go back into senior living ifyou want the God's honest truth.
But I needed money and I hadthis other job interview, and I
wasn't promised a job.
I was promised a secondinterview, and here in senior
living, I almost promised thejob.
So I just took the job.
And they said to me, we don'twant.
What happened in the past, themnot choosing me, you know, in
(12:32):
like life's worst time losing achild and watching the other
child clinging to life, theydon't want that to affect the
future.
And at the time I wasn't veryaware.
I was still surviving and I justsaid, yes, absolutely.
I look back now and I had thebiggest chip on my shoulder
(12:54):
folks.
I'm gonna prove you wrong.
I'm gonna prove that you made abad choice.
That was my mentality and thatwas my mentality for the next
eight years.
Vulnerable point in a humanbeing's life, and then the
identity that you have for yourlife is taken away for no reason
(13:16):
that they didn't, except forthey didn't want you.
That affects you.
And my core trauma was neverbeing enough anyways, and that
community.
It went from 55% to a hundredpercent with a horrific state
survey score and in 18 months orless, and we ran a tight ship
(13:37):
and it was a excellentcommunity.
And now all of a sudden a newowner comes in and they don't
want me, like I was just.
Devastated.
Okay, now I go back to work andwe turn the community around in
18 months or less.
Hard work, but I'm proving apoint.
Lemme tell you something.
(13:57):
And I go in and I make my pointknown.
We grow the occupancy back up.
You know, we're in the 90percentile in 18 months or less.
I can't exactly remember.
I don't, obviously life washectic at that time anyways.
We're doing good.
I win some big fancy award.
The community's doing great,everything's fine.
(14:17):
But eight years later, they dothe same thing to me.
They tell me they can't.
They don't know how to supportme anymore How did we get there?
Like how did we get there?
I think about this all the time.
If you wanna know the truth.
How did I get to that point?
And it's because I allowed mymind to sit in the failure of
(14:44):
being let go.
I allowed my mind to stay in thesentence.
I'm not enough.
And that was the energy that wasinside of my body.
Now, just so you know, insidethe community was nothing but
love rainbows and Skittlesbecause I loved my job.
I loved the people.
I loved feeling the love.
(15:04):
I loved solving the problems.
I loved being people's hero.
I am passionate about it.
So when I talk about myself inthese moments.
It is strictly internal and upto the corporate office.
It is not inside the communitybecause if there's one thing in
(15:25):
my life that I'm proud of, it isbeing an executive director and
I was a good one.
I was not perfect.
And I have made that very known.
I have popped off on people.
I have made bad decisions.
I have not had surveys that weregood.
the list is long.
I'm not perfect.
But I was the version of myselfthat I love the most inside of
the community.
I kept success and failure veryclose, and I was very balanced,
(15:48):
and I genuinely and passionatelyloved working inside of a
community.
But I projected my own negativestories, my own hurt, my own
childhood, traumatic storiesthat started there and then the
adult trauma.
I projected that on to the homeoffice and I defended myself.
(16:12):
And when I wasn't seen withthem.
I got angry.
There was a lot of resentments.
There was A big divide.
And for a long time, becausesome of the surveys in Alabama
for that company wasn't great.
I was able to run that communitylike my own, like I owned it and
so some of that is my faultbecause.
(16:33):
I didn't connect with them thatway.
And They allowed it.
But then as the company gotbigger, they were trying to
scale.
I didn't know what that meant.
I found a way to survive in abig community that did not have
the managerial support that itneeded.
Like it really needed anexecutive director and an
assistant executive director.
(16:54):
And all I had was me theexecutive director.
I found a way to run it for itto make sense, but it wasn't the
way that the home office wantedit ran.
And so when they started comingin and trying to change
everything, that's when the endbegan.
And I look back at that now andI'm like, what were my driving
(17:16):
forces to resist such change?
I resisted change.
It was they had to term, theyhad to ask me to leave.
They had to do that because Irefused to give in.
I refused it.
So what were the three areas?
(17:37):
Like I think back and I'm justlike, okay, what caused me to be
so resistant to change the fearof failure, number one.
The fear of getting fired againfor doing something wrong
because I didn't, I didn't feelsafe.
I didn't feel comfortable withthem.
I didn't trust them.
And so if I had a hundredpercent occupancy, if I had a
(17:57):
good survey, my NOI was good.
Like all these things.
And I knew how to do that, and Idid it consistently.
So if I could just have thosenumbers high enough, I would be
safe.
But that's not true.
That's not true more thananything.
Companies want alignment.
And I think from a personalstandpoint, more than anything,
(18:18):
you need alignment.
And I'm gonna tell yousomething.
I was not aligned with thecompany, and the company was not
aligned with me.
So what you had was a gap ofmisery that could not move
forward.
Now, could we have had aconversation and tried?
Yes.
Could they have hired a coachlike I am?
(18:39):
Yes.
I hired a coach for me and mylife changed.
Because I realized it was thefear of failure that drove me.
The fear of judgment that droveme, the fear of rejection that
drove me, and those were myproblems.
Mine, there was no one else'sproblems.
the fear of failure.
(18:59):
What if I mess up the fear ofjudgment?
What will people think about me?
Because I worked really hard.
For my reputation, for all thosethings.
Like I worked hard for that, andthen they're just gonna take it
away, and then I'm gonna fail,and then I'm not gonna be able
to live up to the expectations.
I mean, I had a good community.
(19:20):
We were one of the best in thearea.
And then the fear of rejection,which is the core wound.
But see, when you have all thatenergy inside of you, you
attract it.
So I attracted a company whowasn't going to see me.
And because I attracted that, Ifought against it and I tried to
prove my worth, which doesn'twork.
(19:41):
Okay, so projection was theproblem.
It wasn't performance, it was myown pain projected on to people.
I thought they were thinkingwhat I was thinking.
They were thinking about me.
There's so many people, evenpeople I coach right now who are
(20:03):
struggling with occupancy, and Iask them this question, when a
tour comes in, are youautomatically thinking that they
know that your occupancy's lowand that you're having all these
struggles?
And the person looks at me like,I'm like these big eyes, and
they say yes.
And I'm like, that's not true.
They're not.
They don't know.
(20:23):
I mean, maybe some people know,but if they knew they wouldn't
be there.
So you have to be aware of whatyou're believing that other
people are thinking about you,but you're not a mind reader.
That's why awareness is soimportant When you are aware of
your own thoughts, of your ownstories, of what you are telling
(20:43):
yourself, and you can changethose, then the lens that you
look through becomes completelyclear.
I don't care about failureanymore.
I have worked through all theshame.
Anything you wanna know aboutwhat I did right or what I did
wrong, I have no problem tellingyou because I learned from it.
(21:05):
I learned from it, and thereforeI'm stronger because of it, and
I am humble and I have grit, andI'm resilient, and I know that I
can do anything I want.
And the other thing is, is Ihave spent, and let me tell you
this, if you've been terminatedor you're looking for a job
right now, I have spent so muchtime crafting a sentence about
(21:28):
why I was asked to leave.
That would be honest andaffirming and true, and other
people not to judge me the fearof judgment.
And how many times have I had touse that sentence?
I once, twice, three times, 10times, 15 times zero.
Nobody cares.
(21:49):
And actually when they find out,they're impressed.
Because I can tell them what Ilearned from it.
Failure is your biggest teacher,and is it failure if it worked
out in your favor?
I call it failure because I feltlike a failure.
Even though I wasn't a failure,I had a hundred percent
community.
(22:10):
I had three near perfectsurveys.
I have turned four communitiesaround from underperforming, 75%
to a hundred percent in fourmonths as a sales director, 67%
to 90 something percent as asales director, and then I
became the executive director.
55% to a hundred percent with astate survey score of 57 and 18
months or less with amazingteams.
(22:31):
And then this last communityafter COVID, we were at 67% and
we went to a hundred percent inone year.
That's not a failure.
That is a success story, but itwasn't enough.
And I think what I want you toknow more than anything.
Is that 100% is not enough.
(22:53):
Your growth, your mentality,your alignment, that's enough.
How you handle the hardproblems, how you have the hard
conversations, how you're ableto communicate, how you receive
people when they walk in, likethat's important.
How you protect yourself.
Bring this wall of defense up.
(23:15):
When people walk in and how youfight change, like these things
they matter more than a hundredpercent.
So a hundred percent isn'tenough, and your growth is more
valuable than the growth of yourcommunity.
Who cares what people thinkabout you?
if you're learning, you'regrowing, and if you're growing,
(23:35):
you're living and that'simportant.
Who cares if you fail?
What did you learn?
I thought in my small community,like showing my face again, was
I would much rather, I don'tknow.
It was nauseating, I'll just saythat, but showing my face again
(23:59):
and putting myself out there andgrowing was more inspiring and
earning respect from people thanI really thought.
And really all I was doing washealing me, showing up for
myself.
And that's the point, like howdo you turn?
This experience, a failure, amistake, a learning lesson from
(24:24):
a failure to a good miss, right?
A good miss versus bad miss,because not all failures are
created equal, So someone who'snot willing to learn from a
mistake is never going to beable to look at a failure and
make it a good miss versus a badmiss.
Not all failure is equal.
(24:45):
A good miss moves you forward,you adjust and you learn.
And a bad miss means that you'reexcuse.
You have all these excuses thatyou're not changing, you're not
growing, and you're just blamingother people and you're
defending yourself, right?
So a goodness is, I lost thesale.
(25:08):
And here is why, and you learn.
I didn't follow up.
I didn't get down to the keyreason.
I didn't ask what success was tothem, and I didn't paint the
picture.
I didn't connect fully, but abad miss would be they chose
the, the other community becauseit had a swimming pool or
(25:29):
because it had, betteractivities.
Something that you don't have,that's a bad miss.
What did you learn when youcommunicate a failure to
someone?
I was asked to leave a communitythat I poured my heart and soul
into.
But here's why.
It was the best thing that everhappened to me.
(25:50):
It stripped away everything thatkept me stuck in some very bad
thought patterns and negativeenergy, and it allowed me to
heal myself and make myself thebiggest puzzle to put back
together.
And my life is better because ofthat.
(26:10):
I learned from it.
That is the biggest return onfailure.
if you're trying to get to ahundred percent and you have a
few good months, and then youhave a few bad months, and you
realize.
These patterns are telling mesomething and you realize that
it's a very simple fix becauseyou looked at all the failures.
(26:33):
Who are we missing?
Why are we losing theseparticular prospects?
When you can realize that andmake adjustments that failure
taught you so.
My sales and marketing directorwasn't asking better questions.
If I'm not retaining top talent,I'm not asking better questions.
I'm not asking them.
(26:53):
I'm not connecting with them.
I'm not supporting them the waythey need to, or in the
interview, I'm not putting mybest self forward to try to
understand who in the interviewI actually need to hire and who
I don't need to hire.
And those failures teach you.
(27:14):
How to interview better, how tosell better, that I need to
introduce people on the tourbecause it connects the
community to the prospectbecause it adds value to the
people that are working.
It makes them feel a part of theprocess, like that's a good miss
(27:35):
when you study what's goingwrong and you learn from it and
you look for the patterns.
That's important.
Right, because you can continueto walk down the same street
with the same hole in it andfall in it every time.
Or you can choose to see thehole to walk around the hole or
(27:55):
go on another street altogether,right?
You have to be aware of theproblem that you keep hitting
over and over again becausethese patterns.
You're either missing it and theuniverse, God, a higher power,
whatever it is to you, keepsgiving you the same problem over
(28:20):
and over again until you get thepoint.
Sometimes it's you.
Sometimes you have to get out ofyour own way.
Sometimes you have to identifythe story, become aware of how
it's harming you, and rewriteit.
And sometimes you just have towork for more knowing that
you're enough.
And when you do that, everythingchanges and you start attracting
(28:43):
the people who are enough andwant to make you better.
And that is where momentum isbuilt.
And it all starts with you.
It all starts on learning fromyour failures, and it all starts
in understanding just howimportant failure is in your
life.
What is a good miss?
What is a bad miss?
(29:04):
You make that decision a badmiss is if you blame everything
and you never, ever reflect onhow you got there.
And how you can avoid that everhappening again.
Life is difficult.
Working inside senior living isdifficult, but if you want to be
(29:25):
good at it, you have to realizeeverything worthwhile is uphill.
Everything, every success ishard earned and hard learned.
and that is part of the process.
Nothing comes easy in thisindustry, so when you expect it
to be easy, you get discouragedand discouragement will stop you
(29:46):
from doing the right things tobring that momentum.
You do not create change if youstop planting the seeds of
momentum.
If you stop because you don'tsee any results, you are not
going to see the resultsimmediately.
Seeds grow in seasons, not inseconds.
(30:07):
Keep doing the right thing evenwhen you don't see the results,
because the results will comeand lemme tell you something.
Be ready.
Because when the results come,it's gonna be a lot.
And that's why the foundationthat you have is so important.
So embrace the hard, embrace,the heart of why rising after a
(30:30):
failure is so worth it.
Doing the deep work, doing thehard work, doing the personal
work because you influence yourcommunity.
Your energy influences yourcommunity, your thought presses,
influences your community.
Your communication influencesyour community.
And if you feel like it's notworth it, if you feel like it's
(30:50):
not valuable, if you feel likeyou're not valuable, no one else
is going to, you are important,and I don't care if you're the
executive director and thedirector of nursing, the sales
and marketing director, youaffect the team.
You affect the community.
A failure should never sit youdown and get you off the team.
(31:11):
You should think about it.
You should reflect about it, andthen you should learn from it.
That's the greatest return onfailure.
Embrace the suck, folks.
It makes the journey lessoverwhelming.
Stop fighting the discomfort andjust allow it.
Because there is so much hope onthe other side of it.
I promise the dip, right?
We talked about the dip before.
(31:33):
The dip is worth the climb.
It's where the treasure is.
So don't lay there and getdefensive and feel sorry for
yourself.
Learn from it.
Take stock in it.
It is worth it.
Okay?
We're gonna talk about.
Failure, obviously this episodeand next episode, I'm gonna
actually go through the tacticalways that you can learn from
(31:58):
your failure.
Actually someone that used towork on my team who was put in a
position of an interim regionaldirector or district director,
'cause this person was anexecutive director of another
community.
Anyways, details the sentencethat stuck out the most was they
(32:18):
don't know how to support youanymore.
And that sentence has, I mean,just lived in my head, rent
free.
Most companies don't know how tosupport the leaders who don't
feel like they're enough or lackconfidence in their own personal
selves or have a professionaland a personal growth gap.
That's so big'cause they're twodifferent people.
(32:40):
And when I invested in coachingfor myself, I invested$5,000.
So, you know, that wasnauseating for me, and it
changed my life.
It was the best money I everspent.
No one invested in me.
I did that myself, and I learnedjust how valuable coaching is.
A mentor slash coach, somebodywho.
(33:02):
Has no shame and we'll talkabout it all.
Somebody who allow creates thisgrowth environment and says to
you, you can say whatever youwant to mean.
I don't care.
I'm not gonna judge you.
I'm gonna help walk you throughit.
I'm gonna give you steps on whatto do to get you out of this
hole that you're in, whetherit's a operational thing,
whether it's a mindset thing.
What I am learning with myclients is that it's both.
(33:24):
The mindset is keeping themstuck in the operation piece.
It's confidence.
There is so much going on insideof your communities, you are
being pulled in so manydifferent ways that you can't
see straight.
That's what coaching andmentoring does, and that's why
I'm uniquely qualified to do itbecause I can speak your
(33:45):
language.
Both from the personalstandpoint and the professional
standpoint.
That's why I built the mentoringcompany.
That's why we created thecourse.
That's why we have the ED launchlab, and that's why I take
one-on-one clients for thatperson who wants to succeed, who
loves their job, but is stuckand doesn't know how to get out.
That's my specialty.
(34:06):
It's what I love to do.
And that's why you should investin yourself.
And now I do work with companiesand they pay for coaching for
their, for their associates.
And maybe your company will dothat too, but if they don't
invest in yourselves,'cause yourlife can get so much easier.
the clients that I have aresucceeding whenever they were
(34:31):
feeling like they were failingbefore and it wasn't true.
They just needed somebody elseto look at them and say.
You've got this.
Let me help you get out of yourown way.
Let me help you rewrite thestory that you're telling
yourself with the truth.
And then let's operate fromearning and being more right,
(34:51):
being more when you already knowthat you're enough.
That's called growth.
That's what I do and I love it,and I would love.
To be part of your journey too.
You can buy a course to earn5.25 NAB approved CEUs.
If you need administrator'slicense, you can join the new ED
(35:14):
Launch Lab, which is gonna startin September.
And I'm always available forone-on-one coaching.
And I am a keynote speaker atthe national Center for Assisted
Living, AKA in Cal Day inOctober.
And that in itself is enough foryou to say, if she can fail and
(35:36):
get back up, then I can fail andget back up.
It's taken a lot of hard work,but I'm so proud.
I'm proud to be on that stageand to talk about my failures
and to help leaders get out oftheir own way.
That's my new mission.
You.
Me and growing together.
(35:57):
we're gonna learn next week.
I'm gonna talk to you about realtactical ways to learn from
failure, right?
To make every failure a goodmiss and not a bad miss.
Every day you are balancingfamilies, regulations, emotions,
and operations.
You are going to fail, butfailure does not define you.
(36:17):
It's how you respond to thefailure that does.
So if you can learn, improve andreenter with a new perspective,
nothing is going to stop you.
Growth is the goal, influencesthe outcome.
With being enough as thefoundation, you've got this and
(36:38):
you are worth it.
So own your story so you cancreate your future.
See you next time.
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