May 22, 2025 • 31 mins
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Episode Transcript
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(00:01):
Welcome back to another episodeof The Aspire for More with Erin
podcast.
Today we're going to talk abouthiring for influence, not just
hiring for skills, influence isgoing to lie in those soft
skills, which is what we'regonna talk about a little bit
today.
And remember, the main goal forthis podcast, every episode, is
(00:25):
to be a podcast that mentorsmotivates and builds momentum
for senior living leaders likeyou.
The reason that we wanna hirefor influence is because you
don't just need people who dothe work.
The leaders inside of ourcommunities need to be the
people who are willing and ableto develop others to do the
(00:49):
work.
People who multiply trust,impact, and leadership across
your entire community.
This is what we're doing wrong.
We are focusing on all the workwhich keeps us stuck.
But when we focus on developingmore people who can do more of
(01:11):
the work, we're creating morefreedom.
We're multiplying our impact,and we're creating a growth
environment inside of ourcommunity, which I will tell you
is lacking.
And the more that we can growpeople in our environment, the
more accountability.
The more influence, the morepositive culture we have.
(01:35):
The culture, that culture iswhat sells the community.
It really is a cycle ofpositivity and growth that's
certainly not full of problemfree living, but understands
that every problem, as cliche asthis sounds, is an opportunity
(01:56):
to grow.
And that mindset is a choice.
It's a choice you make every daybecause if you learn from it,
that problem will eventuallyturn into another problem.
And the better at solvingproblems you are the less power
(02:17):
it has over you.
And that's why hiring forinfluence is important.
Because you can create otherpeople to solve the problems the
right way.
So story time.
How did Aaron learn this lesson?
Oh, you know, the hard way, Imean, we all have positions in
(02:40):
communities that turn over andover and over again, and I am no
different.
I struggled mightily with sameproblem over and over again.
Hiring people that I knew that Iwould have to carry a lot of the
weight.
And I was willing to do thatbecause I wanted to have the
(03:02):
position filled rather thanhaving a void at some degree,
you stop wanting that and youstart looking for not somebody
who can just put pen to paper ordata entry of assessments and
different resident care updatesthat have to be done or sales,
(03:25):
and you find somebody who'swilling to do the deep work to
make it better for everybody.
And I did that and there weretwo positions that turned over
quite a bit.
And I learned, number one, Idon't wanna have to carry the
load for somebody.
(03:46):
It wasn't worth it.
I wanted to find somebody whocould carry.
The load themselves and come tome when they needed help.
That was the leader I waslooking for, or in another
department.
It was somebody who understoodthat sales was hard and sales
and senior living is not a 30hour job a week.
(04:11):
It's a lot of hours of work in aweek, and you have to want to
sell this team the way that itis.
And the sales director had to bea good representation of our
passionate community, whichmeant that you needed to sell,
not just be a face.
(04:32):
And there's, two differentdepartments, a lot of turnover
until I started looking for theright things, not someone who
was just going to do the tasks,be in the chair and show up.
But someone that was willing totake the time and understand who
(04:53):
we were as a community and addvalue to it.
Someone who doesn't just exist,but someone who wants to thrive,
and that takes somebody whounderstands their strengths.
Take somebody who wants to makean impact in people's lives and
who understands that at thebeginning it's going to be
(05:16):
difficult.
We're going to understand allthe details.
We're gonna do the same thingsover and over again until you
can build on it, and then we canidentify the problem that's
happening over and over againand solve it.
Understand, being able, someonewho understands that the value
of connection is just asimportant, if not more than the
(05:37):
value of competency.
And that starts with the hiringmanager, you know, someone to
ask the appropriate questions tofigure out, can this person
develop people on this team, addvalue to this team, and grow
this team to new heights ofsuccess.
(06:00):
It sounds like a lot wheneveryou just want this position
filled, but think about.
You for a second.
Do you want just anyone or doyou want somebody who can make a
difference?
And if you become reallyintentional about what you want,
(06:24):
you will find it.
It is because you are notintentional with what you think.
What you know that you want iswhy we make decisions.
That do not serve us.
The more intentional you are,the more you will see what
(06:45):
you're looking for and whatyou're not looking for, which is
really, really important.
So the biggest mistake we make,and I'll say this again, is that
we hire for competence and weforget to understand the value
and the importance ofconnection.
Managing will get the tasksdone.
But influencing is aboutbuilding more people, developing
(07:09):
more people into, to teammatesthat can carry the load and
support each other.
I remember in a community thatwas struggling after a really
bad survey, the consultants thatwe had in the community would
remind us, remind ourcaregivers, forget about the
(07:31):
tasks.
And focus more on the care ofthe residents and the memory
care that we were in.
Each hall had their owndishwasher and their own steam
wells.
They were responsible forserving the food, and they would
get so caught up in the tasks ofcleaning the plates of
sanitizing, the tables ofsweeping the floor, that it was
(07:51):
hard, that sometimes theresidents would get lost in the
transition it was, don't focusso much on the tasks that we
forget to connect with theresidents.
Focusing on tasks, we get lostbecause it's easy or checking
stuff off the list.
And if we forget about theconnection, we can forget about
(08:14):
influencing people if we're justgonna sit in the office and.
Hit the check marks of all thetasks that we got done.
There's so many other thingsthat we missed out on when we're
talking about influencing anddeveloping people into higher
levels of leadership or growingpeople up to be able to enter
(08:36):
different levels of leadershipbecause leadership is influence.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Sales is influence.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
That's why I think thatleadership and sales are the
same.
We have to be able to influencethe people, our teammates, to
(08:58):
want to do better, to want to bea part of a team that impacts
lives in the community, thatwant to grow themselves.
Can we create a growthenvironment inside of our
communities?
Yes, we can.
We just have to be intentionalabout it.
We have to focus on when we doour tasks and can we get those
(09:23):
done quickly.
And then can we get out on thefloor and start adding value,
influencing and growing peopleto understand more what they can
do to make a bigger impact inthis community.
And it starts with hiring theright leaders, right?
If we want thriving communities,if we want more freedom in our
leadership.
We need to start hiring leaderswho lead with influence, not
(09:48):
just authority.
So when you are interviewingsomebody, think about the best
leader in your life, in yourcommunity, someone who's
impacted your life in a powerfulway, someone that you admire.
Somebody that if we had more ofthat person, we would have.
(10:12):
More leaders in our community,in our industry, in our company.
What does that look like foryou?
What things would you look for,would you say?
What would you name about thatperson that you would want to
find in a new hire for aleadership position?
(10:36):
For me, it would look like theywere kind.
They were loyal, funny,coachable, optimistic problem
solver.
You might even say creativeproblem solver.
Willing, prepared.
But what are all of thosecharacteristics?
Are they gifts, attitudes, orskills?
(11:00):
Well, those aren't gifts.
Because gifts are talents andwe're born with those.
They could be attitudes and theycould be skills, but they're
hard to measure, and so theywould follow under soft skills.
But even more than that, ifthey're a choice, attitudes and
(11:24):
skills are a choice because youcan learn how to do both of
them.
And when you hire people, whenyou hire leaders for influence,
you wanna hire people that arecoachable, that are honest, that
are problem solvers, thatthey're planners, and they're
willing.
(11:45):
These are the things that arehard to measure, which is why
they're called soft skills.
Hello.
They are the skills that arehardest to find right now.
So maybe we should call them thehardest to find skills.
I don't know.
We only call them soft skillsbecause they're hard to measure,
not because they're hard toacquire and hard to strengthen.
(12:10):
When you're looking to hiresomeone, we want to look for
people who can build trust, whohave accountability for their
story, their life story.
Accountability is key, and whocan make connections with other
people.
So how do we know if they'retrust builders?
They're gonna say words, andyou're gonna look for hints of
(12:32):
words of transparency,consistency, and care.
They cared about things in, theycared about people and
opportunities in other places,they are consistent.
You see that in the hiringprocess.
You see that in their follow upprocess.
You see that on their resume,and you ask questions about
(12:54):
consistency because consistencybuilds trust, period.
Consistency in the bad willclearly break it.
Consistency in the good willbuild it.
And then being transparent.
Are they too transparent, whichis a problem, Or if they're just
the right amount oftransparency, which is critical
(13:14):
when we're looking at somebodywho can build trust.
And every department inside ofour communities need to be able
to build trust.
To me, when you own your story,that's accountability.
When you own your story, youembody the mission and you can
align your personal values withthe organization's values.
(13:36):
I think a great question to askis to bring up the company's
core values.
Maybe even bring up your owncore values, like what's
important to you, and thenasking the applicant, what are
your values?
What do you value and how dothey show up in your work?
That question alone will tellyou a lot about how they own
(13:58):
their story and about do theyunderstand their values and
their strengths?
Because if you are a leader whois focused on managing and
leading through your strengths,you create influence and that
means that it's easier to makeconnections.
And when in order to makeconnections with your team,
(14:18):
you're able to coach them, whichmeans creating a growth
environment, allowing them tosee problems as opportunities to
grow.
That's coaching people throughthe process, not scolding them,
not shaming them.
It's okay, we have anopportunity to grow here.
Let's talk about it.
(14:40):
Coaches ask great questions andthey listen and they develop
others.
Lou Holtz, the coach for NotreDame, asked a lot of questions
before he ever changed anythingwhen he went into a new program,
and he says, you can't learnanything without asking
(15:01):
questions first.
So remember, a good coach asksgreat questions.
Because that's how you learnwhere your team is at and that's
how you can figure out how toget them to follow you, where
you want to go.
And so it's the same thing forthe hiring process.
(15:21):
You gotta ask the good questionsso you know, is this a task
oriented person or is this aleadership oriented person?
And even better can we get themboth there if they or one or the
other.
Because that would be the dream,wouldn't it?
So how to spot influence in aninterview.
(15:43):
So how do we do that?
We go into an interview and wewant to make sure that we can
hire a somebody who has thepotential to be an influenced
based leadership.
We wanna hire somebody who hasthe ability to be an influential
leader that can create a bigimpact inside of your community.
How can we find that?
(16:04):
To me, a great resume will tellyou what someone has done.
Yes, that's what a resume isfor.
But great questions.
This is how they show you.
How they can lead.
And so here are a few influencebased questions that you can ask
in every interview.
If you want these questions anda few more, I can send them to
(16:27):
you in an email.
You just let me know.
Um, there will be a link, um, onthe show notes of this podcast.
But here's the first question.
Tell me about a time that youled through adversity and what
did you learn?
Now when you listen to this,you're going to listen.
(16:49):
Do I hear building trust?
Are they being transparent withme?
Do they show that they care?
Did they get coached and listen?
Did they develop others or arethey talking about it in a
negative way?
And is there a lot of blame andno accountability then you're
(17:11):
gonna wanna ask more questionsand you're gonna wanna listen to
the rest of the interviewbecause blame does not equal
accountability.
I can say a lot about a lot ofdifferent scenarios inside of
senior living, and I would beright, but none of that matters
because.
(17:32):
When I blame people, I losecontrol of the future that I
want.
I stay stuck.
But when I am accountable for myactions that contributed to
whatever adverse circumstancesgoing on in my life, I am
empowered to learn from thecircumstance.
And so you want to listen forempowerment or blame.
(17:55):
That's key.
Because we want people who willbuild trust, who will own their
story, which is accountabilityand who can make connections.
Another question is, how do youencourage resilience in your
team?
How do you encourage resiliencein your team, which is how do
you teach your team how toovercome challenges and to keep
(18:17):
going, how to rise above.
What's going on in thecommunity?
How to overcome a negativeinteraction with a resident and
turn around and be able to carefor another resident who is
actually loving and appreciativeof the work that you do.
That's resiliency.
How do you teach that?
That's an excellent question.
(18:38):
To try to figure out can theybuild trust?
Do they own their story, and canwe help and coach people to rise
above?
What motivates you to invest inothers?
Now if you are looking for aleader who will invest in
others, what motivates them toinvest in others is a key
question to see.
(18:58):
Have they ever invested insomeone?
Do they even know what that is?
Do they know how to answer thatquestion?
That's a critical question tofigure out if there are
influence based leadershipskills in this particular hire.
Can you give an example of howyou modeled generosity as a
(19:19):
leader?
That is a great question forsomeone that helps you
understand, do they know how tocoach?
Do they know how to listen, andhave they developed others into
better leaders?
Every leader who works in seniorliving needs to have a desire to
develop others underneath them.
(19:42):
And to be able to delegate tasksto them so the leader can have
more time to focus on developingothers and growing people up.
Because the further we get downinto, you know, the next five
and 10 years, the more thatwe're going to have to build the
bench of our leadership teamfrom the people who are
(20:03):
currently working inside of ourcommunity.
What is the plan in doing that?
Have you ever coached someonewho passed you up professionally
and what was that like for you?
It's a tough question, right?
That certainly will help youfind out can they own their
(20:26):
story?
Can they take accountability?
Are they transparent?
You know, are they happy forpeople?
One of the reasons why I thinkleaders do not develop people
the way that we should insidesenior living is really for this
very reason.
I have had people who worked asa manager for me get called up
(20:52):
to be a specialist within theirdepartment.
Yeah, it hurt.
But I was so happy for them.
I had a regional director whowas my counterpart at a
community nine miles down theroad.
That hurt too, but it was achoice for me to choose to
(21:15):
support her rather than.
Resent her and it was the bestdecision I ever made, and it
really brought me to a new levelof maturity.
That whole, I don't wanna yankher crown, I want to fix it.
Type of mindset.
(21:36):
How people answer that questionis important for you.
I was just transparent.
It hurt.
It stung.
Actually, I've been honest aboutthat in the past, but I deeply
cared for both of those peopleand I wanted them to succeed.
And I embodied the mission thatthis was my story.
(21:59):
I am a community level leaderand I bought into that, and my
goal is to develop more leaders.
So they can go and be betterleaders making a great effort
inside of the community, insideof our profession.
That thought wasn't thereconsistently all the time, but
(22:20):
it certainly stayed consistentafter I got over the hurt.
And if somebody can be thattransparent with you.
Then I believe that person isthe influence based leader that
you want.
And it doesn't have to beobviously that extreme it, it
can be, you know, in a differentscenario where they became a
(22:44):
team lead or somebody graduatedbefore they did or to something
to that degree.
If you see transparency and yousee growth in the answer.
How they had a situation thatcould have been negative, but
yet they turned it into apositive and they grew from it.
They are your people if youtrust what they're saying.
(23:06):
These aren't questions.
These aren't just interviewquestions.
These are influence indicatorsand there's something that you
want to make sure that you askabout the soft skills that are
important to you.
What does your community need?
Every community has a story, andif you are an executive director
(23:33):
or you are a director ofnursing, or you are a regional
director, knowing the story ofthe community of your region
each department head andunderstanding what the strengths
are and what the weaknesses are,and the type of skills that this
new leader needs to have isvery, very important.
(23:54):
People support what they helpcreate, and if you want a team
that thrives, start hiringpeople.
Start hiring people whocompliment your strengths and
cover your blind spots.
Start valuing relationships asmuch as results, and know that
(24:15):
the culture is built on trustand not titles and metrics
alone.
It's built on trust.
That they understand this seniorliving profession is just as
much a relationship builtbusiness as it is a real estate
built business, as it is aregulatory built business.
(24:38):
Because if you can align allthose things together, you have
a leader who understands.
If you can say that you're ahiring for a director of nursing
and your nursing expertise isgoing to be vital, but it's not
gonna be the only thing that'sgonna make you successful at
this community, what will makeyou successful at this
community?
(24:58):
It's understanding that you area vital role in the sales
process.
That you're a vital role inbuilding and developing the care
team to where they feelimportant and valued at every
step of the way.
That you're a vital role incommunicating what the
maintenance department needs todo to keep people safe, that
you're a vital role incommunicating to our family
(25:20):
members to make them feel safe.
That is what success looks likein a director of nursing role
here.
That's what you need to hirefor.
That's what your communityneeds.
So before every new hire, beforeevery interview that you do,
make sure that you know whatyour community needs, what
(25:43):
skills, both soft and hardskills that you're looking for,
and ask yourself, will thisperson lead when no one is
watching?
Because that's where the realwork is.
We all know that.
And can I trust them to growothers and not just execute the
tasks because we're moving intoa time inside of this profession
(26:10):
where it's much, much moreinvolved.
Where success is much more thantasks more than filling out an
assessment or doing a fire drillor making a phone call.
(26:31):
It's about creating impact.
It's about communicating value,and it's about ensuring that we
all understand the role that weplay in success.
'cause it's not a one persongame.
It's not a two person game.
And it certainly isn't a threeperson game.
It is the entire team workingtogether to get it done,
(26:56):
whatever it is.
And so when you go to hire, youwanna make sure that you hire
somebody that fits where youwanna go.
As a leader in the vision thatyou have, and that can align
their own personal values to thecompany or the community's
values.
It's really important softskills or is what is required to
(27:19):
succeed today in this seniorliving profession, in this
modern senior living professionthat we're living in.
And you have to intentionallylook for it.
And when you focus on strengths.
And leading from your strengthsand hiring for weaknesses,
letting somebody be strong inthe areas that you're weak and
(27:40):
allowing that to happen, that'swhen influence happens.
These are the influence basedleadership skills that you wanna
look for, and you don't evenhave to hire that out from
outside.
Look for it from within yourcommunity.
Start training for it now.
Build your bench because we'regonna need it.
(28:02):
So don't just hire people to dothe job.
Hire the people who will developothers to do it even better.
The best leaders don't add tasksto your plate.
The best leaders understand thattheir job is to build and
(28:23):
multiply.
Influence and effectiveness, soall of our plates can be freed
up.
The more we teach people how togrow and do the more freedom we
will have.
Your goal as a leader is tocreate the growth and
environment and your community,grow your people.
(28:46):
And watch your occupancy and NOIand retention rates grow shortly
after you start growing yourpeople.
It is just something that is acycle that doesn't stop and
speak to the 20% in the roomthat actually do the work and
(29:09):
move the needle of success.
Speak hope.
Speak life, speak possibilities,and watch how maybe 20% of the
80% that doesn't want to workgrow to the potential in the
room.
It starts with asking the rightquestions.
It starts with being intentionalwith what you're looking for,
(29:32):
and it starts with a mindsetshift from you that it will get
better because you are gettingbetter.
And that's what it requiresbecause a community is just a
community.
Until a great leader steps in,it makes it a great place to
(29:53):
live and work.
And that's you.
If this conversation, thisepisode resonates with you, feel
free to share this.
Thank you for listening.
I appreciate it.
We are opening up our next, newEd's playbook cohort.
I have a course out with AaronFish.
It's called the New Ed'sPlaybook, building an Impactful
(30:16):
Culture.
This is certainly part of that,and if you know a new leader or
somebody who wants to be anexecutive director or grow
within their leadership in thecurrent position they're in.
Send them my way, I'll be morethan happy to coach them.
Um, a lot of great things arebeing done in the coaching realm
in senior living, and it's beenexciting to be a part of that.
(30:39):
As for always to my listeners,aspire for more for you and if
you own your story, you willcreate the future that you want.
Till the next episode, have agreat rest of your day.
Welcome back to another episodeof The Aspire for More with Erin
podcast.
Today we're going to talk abouthiring for influence, not just
hiring for skills, influence isgoing to lie in those soft
skills, which is what we'regonna talk about a little bit
today.
And remember, the main goal forthis podcast, every episode, is
(00:25):
to be a podcast that mentorsmotivates and builds momentum
for senior living leaders likeyou.
The reason that we wanna hirefor influence is because you
don't just need people who dothe work.
The leaders inside of ourcommunities need to be the
people who are willing and ableto develop others to do the
(00:49):
work.
People who multiply trust,impact, and leadership across
your entire community.
This is what we're doing wrong.
We are focusing on all the workwhich keeps us stuck.
But when we focus on developingmore people who can do more of
(01:11):
the work, we're creating morefreedom.
We're multiplying our impact,and we're creating a growth
environment inside of ourcommunity, which I will tell you
is lacking.
And the more that we can growpeople in our environment, the
more accountability.
The more influence, the morepositive culture we have.
(01:35):
The culture, that culture iswhat sells the community.
It really is a cycle ofpositivity and growth that's
certainly not full of problemfree living, but understands
that every problem, as cliche asthis sounds, is an opportunity
(01:56):
to grow.
And that mindset is a choice.
It's a choice you make every daybecause if you learn from it,
that problem will eventuallyturn into another problem.
And the better at solvingproblems you are the less power
(02:17):
it has over you.
And that's why hiring forinfluence is important.
Because you can create otherpeople to solve the problems the
right way.
So story time.
How did Aaron learn this lesson?
Oh, you know, the hard way, Imean, we all have positions in
(02:40):
communities that turn over andover and over again, and I am no
different.
I struggled mightily with sameproblem over and over again.
Hiring people that I knew that Iwould have to carry a lot of the
weight.
And I was willing to do thatbecause I wanted to have the
(03:02):
position filled rather thanhaving a void at some degree,
you stop wanting that and youstart looking for not somebody
who can just put pen to paper ordata entry of assessments and
different resident care updatesthat have to be done or sales,
(03:25):
and you find somebody who'swilling to do the deep work to
make it better for everybody.
And I did that and there weretwo positions that turned over
quite a bit.
And I learned, number one, Idon't wanna have to carry the
load for somebody.
(03:46):
It wasn't worth it.
I wanted to find somebody whocould carry.
The load themselves and come tome when they needed help.
That was the leader I waslooking for, or in another
department.
It was somebody who understoodthat sales was hard and sales
and senior living is not a 30hour job a week.
(04:11):
It's a lot of hours of work in aweek, and you have to want to
sell this team the way that itis.
And the sales director had to bea good representation of our
passionate community, whichmeant that you needed to sell,
not just be a face.
(04:32):
And there's, two differentdepartments, a lot of turnover
until I started looking for theright things, not someone who
was just going to do the tasks,be in the chair and show up.
But someone that was willing totake the time and understand who
(04:53):
we were as a community and addvalue to it.
Someone who doesn't just exist,but someone who wants to thrive,
and that takes somebody whounderstands their strengths.
Take somebody who wants to makean impact in people's lives and
who understands that at thebeginning it's going to be
(05:16):
difficult.
We're going to understand allthe details.
We're gonna do the same thingsover and over again until you
can build on it, and then we canidentify the problem that's
happening over and over againand solve it.
Understand, being able, someonewho understands that the value
of connection is just asimportant, if not more than the
(05:37):
value of competency.
And that starts with the hiringmanager, you know, someone to
ask the appropriate questions tofigure out, can this person
develop people on this team, addvalue to this team, and grow
this team to new heights ofsuccess.
(06:00):
It sounds like a lot wheneveryou just want this position
filled, but think about.
You for a second.
Do you want just anyone or doyou want somebody who can make a
difference?
And if you become reallyintentional about what you want,
(06:24):
you will find it.
It is because you are notintentional with what you think.
What you know that you want iswhy we make decisions.
That do not serve us.
The more intentional you are,the more you will see what
(06:45):
you're looking for and whatyou're not looking for, which is
really, really important.
So the biggest mistake we make,and I'll say this again, is that
we hire for competence and weforget to understand the value
and the importance ofconnection.
Managing will get the tasksdone.
But influencing is aboutbuilding more people, developing
(07:09):
more people into, to teammatesthat can carry the load and
support each other.
I remember in a community thatwas struggling after a really
bad survey, the consultants thatwe had in the community would
remind us, remind ourcaregivers, forget about the
(07:31):
tasks.
And focus more on the care ofthe residents and the memory
care that we were in.
Each hall had their owndishwasher and their own steam
wells.
They were responsible forserving the food, and they would
get so caught up in the tasks ofcleaning the plates of
sanitizing, the tables ofsweeping the floor, that it was
(07:51):
hard, that sometimes theresidents would get lost in the
transition it was, don't focusso much on the tasks that we
forget to connect with theresidents.
Focusing on tasks, we get lostbecause it's easy or checking
stuff off the list.
And if we forget about theconnection, we can forget about
(08:14):
influencing people if we're justgonna sit in the office and.
Hit the check marks of all thetasks that we got done.
There's so many other thingsthat we missed out on when we're
talking about influencing anddeveloping people into higher
levels of leadership or growingpeople up to be able to enter
(08:36):
different levels of leadershipbecause leadership is influence.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Sales is influence.
Nothing more.
Nothing less.
That's why I think thatleadership and sales are the
same.
We have to be able to influencethe people, our teammates, to
(08:58):
want to do better, to want to bea part of a team that impacts
lives in the community, thatwant to grow themselves.
Can we create a growthenvironment inside of our
communities?
Yes, we can.
We just have to be intentionalabout it.
We have to focus on when we doour tasks and can we get those
(09:23):
done quickly.
And then can we get out on thefloor and start adding value,
influencing and growing peopleto understand more what they can
do to make a bigger impact inthis community.
And it starts with hiring theright leaders, right?
If we want thriving communities,if we want more freedom in our
leadership.
We need to start hiring leaderswho lead with influence, not
(09:48):
just authority.
So when you are interviewingsomebody, think about the best
leader in your life, in yourcommunity, someone who's
impacted your life in a powerfulway, someone that you admire.
Somebody that if we had more ofthat person, we would have.
(10:12):
More leaders in our community,in our industry, in our company.
What does that look like foryou?
What things would you look for,would you say?
What would you name about thatperson that you would want to
find in a new hire for aleadership position?
(10:36):
For me, it would look like theywere kind.
They were loyal, funny,coachable, optimistic problem
solver.
You might even say creativeproblem solver.
Willing, prepared.
But what are all of thosecharacteristics?
Are they gifts, attitudes, orskills?
(11:00):
Well, those aren't gifts.
Because gifts are talents andwe're born with those.
They could be attitudes and theycould be skills, but they're
hard to measure, and so theywould follow under soft skills.
But even more than that, ifthey're a choice, attitudes and
(11:24):
skills are a choice because youcan learn how to do both of
them.
And when you hire people, whenyou hire leaders for influence,
you wanna hire people that arecoachable, that are honest, that
are problem solvers, thatthey're planners, and they're
willing.
(11:45):
These are the things that arehard to measure, which is why
they're called soft skills.
Hello.
They are the skills that arehardest to find right now.
So maybe we should call them thehardest to find skills.
I don't know.
We only call them soft skillsbecause they're hard to measure,
not because they're hard toacquire and hard to strengthen.
(12:10):
When you're looking to hiresomeone, we want to look for
people who can build trust, whohave accountability for their
story, their life story.
Accountability is key, and whocan make connections with other
people.
So how do we know if they'retrust builders?
They're gonna say words, andyou're gonna look for hints of
(12:32):
words of transparency,consistency, and care.
They cared about things in, theycared about people and
opportunities in other places,they are consistent.
You see that in the hiringprocess.
You see that in their follow upprocess.
You see that on their resume,and you ask questions about
(12:54):
consistency because consistencybuilds trust, period.
Consistency in the bad willclearly break it.
Consistency in the good willbuild it.
And then being transparent.
Are they too transparent, whichis a problem, Or if they're just
the right amount oftransparency, which is critical
(13:14):
when we're looking at somebodywho can build trust.
And every department inside ofour communities need to be able
to build trust.
To me, when you own your story,that's accountability.
When you own your story, youembody the mission and you can
align your personal values withthe organization's values.
(13:36):
I think a great question to askis to bring up the company's
core values.
Maybe even bring up your owncore values, like what's
important to you, and thenasking the applicant, what are
your values?
What do you value and how dothey show up in your work?
That question alone will tellyou a lot about how they own
(13:58):
their story and about do theyunderstand their values and
their strengths?
Because if you are a leader whois focused on managing and
leading through your strengths,you create influence and that
means that it's easier to makeconnections.
And when in order to makeconnections with your team,
(14:18):
you're able to coach them, whichmeans creating a growth
environment, allowing them tosee problems as opportunities to
grow.
That's coaching people throughthe process, not scolding them,
not shaming them.
It's okay, we have anopportunity to grow here.
Let's talk about it.
(14:40):
Coaches ask great questions andthey listen and they develop
others.
Lou Holtz, the coach for NotreDame, asked a lot of questions
before he ever changed anythingwhen he went into a new program,
and he says, you can't learnanything without asking
(15:01):
questions first.
So remember, a good coach asksgreat questions.
Because that's how you learnwhere your team is at and that's
how you can figure out how toget them to follow you, where
you want to go.
And so it's the same thing forthe hiring process.
(15:21):
You gotta ask the good questionsso you know, is this a task
oriented person or is this aleadership oriented person?
And even better can we get themboth there if they or one or the
other.
Because that would be the dream,wouldn't it?
So how to spot influence in aninterview.
(15:43):
So how do we do that?
We go into an interview and wewant to make sure that we can
hire a somebody who has thepotential to be an influenced
based leadership.
We wanna hire somebody who hasthe ability to be an influential
leader that can create a bigimpact inside of your community.
How can we find that?
(16:04):
To me, a great resume will tellyou what someone has done.
Yes, that's what a resume isfor.
But great questions.
This is how they show you.
How they can lead.
And so here are a few influencebased questions that you can ask
in every interview.
If you want these questions anda few more, I can send them to
(16:27):
you in an email.
You just let me know.
Um, there will be a link, um, onthe show notes of this podcast.
But here's the first question.
Tell me about a time that youled through adversity and what
did you learn?
Now when you listen to this,you're going to listen.
(16:49):
Do I hear building trust?
Are they being transparent withme?
Do they show that they care?
Did they get coached and listen?
Did they develop others or arethey talking about it in a
negative way?
And is there a lot of blame andno accountability then you're
(17:11):
gonna wanna ask more questionsand you're gonna wanna listen to
the rest of the interviewbecause blame does not equal
accountability.
I can say a lot about a lot ofdifferent scenarios inside of
senior living, and I would beright, but none of that matters
because.
(17:32):
When I blame people, I losecontrol of the future that I
want.
I stay stuck.
But when I am accountable for myactions that contributed to
whatever adverse circumstancesgoing on in my life, I am
empowered to learn from thecircumstance.
And so you want to listen forempowerment or blame.
(17:55):
That's key.
Because we want people who willbuild trust, who will own their
story, which is accountabilityand who can make connections.
Another question is, how do youencourage resilience in your
team?
How do you encourage resiliencein your team, which is how do
you teach your team how toovercome challenges and to keep
(18:17):
going, how to rise above.
What's going on in thecommunity?
How to overcome a negativeinteraction with a resident and
turn around and be able to carefor another resident who is
actually loving and appreciativeof the work that you do.
That's resiliency.
How do you teach that?
That's an excellent question.
(18:38):
To try to figure out can theybuild trust?
Do they own their story, and canwe help and coach people to rise
above?
What motivates you to invest inothers?
Now if you are looking for aleader who will invest in
others, what motivates them toinvest in others is a key
question to see.
(18:58):
Have they ever invested insomeone?
Do they even know what that is?
Do they know how to answer thatquestion?
That's a critical question tofigure out if there are
influence based leadershipskills in this particular hire.
Can you give an example of howyou modeled generosity as a
(19:19):
leader?
That is a great question forsomeone that helps you
understand, do they know how tocoach?
Do they know how to listen, andhave they developed others into
better leaders?
Every leader who works in seniorliving needs to have a desire to
develop others underneath them.
(19:42):
And to be able to delegate tasksto them so the leader can have
more time to focus on developingothers and growing people up.
Because the further we get downinto, you know, the next five
and 10 years, the more thatwe're going to have to build the
bench of our leadership teamfrom the people who are
(20:03):
currently working inside of ourcommunity.
What is the plan in doing that?
Have you ever coached someonewho passed you up professionally
and what was that like for you?
It's a tough question, right?
That certainly will help youfind out can they own their
(20:26):
story?
Can they take accountability?
Are they transparent?
You know, are they happy forpeople?
One of the reasons why I thinkleaders do not develop people
the way that we should insidesenior living is really for this
very reason.
I have had people who worked asa manager for me get called up
(20:52):
to be a specialist within theirdepartment.
Yeah, it hurt.
But I was so happy for them.
I had a regional director whowas my counterpart at a
community nine miles down theroad.
That hurt too, but it was achoice for me to choose to
(21:15):
support her rather than.
Resent her and it was the bestdecision I ever made, and it
really brought me to a new levelof maturity.
That whole, I don't wanna yankher crown, I want to fix it.
Type of mindset.
(21:36):
How people answer that questionis important for you.
I was just transparent.
It hurt.
It stung.
Actually, I've been honest aboutthat in the past, but I deeply
cared for both of those peopleand I wanted them to succeed.
And I embodied the mission thatthis was my story.
(21:59):
I am a community level leaderand I bought into that, and my
goal is to develop more leaders.
So they can go and be betterleaders making a great effort
inside of the community, insideof our profession.
That thought wasn't thereconsistently all the time, but
(22:20):
it certainly stayed consistentafter I got over the hurt.
And if somebody can be thattransparent with you.
Then I believe that person isthe influence based leader that
you want.
And it doesn't have to beobviously that extreme it, it
can be, you know, in a differentscenario where they became a
(22:44):
team lead or somebody graduatedbefore they did or to something
to that degree.
If you see transparency and yousee growth in the answer.
How they had a situation thatcould have been negative, but
yet they turned it into apositive and they grew from it.
They are your people if youtrust what they're saying.
(23:06):
These aren't questions.
These aren't just interviewquestions.
These are influence indicatorsand there's something that you
want to make sure that you askabout the soft skills that are
important to you.
What does your community need?
Every community has a story, andif you are an executive director
(23:33):
or you are a director ofnursing, or you are a regional
director, knowing the story ofthe community of your region
each department head andunderstanding what the strengths
are and what the weaknesses are,and the type of skills that this
new leader needs to have isvery, very important.
(23:54):
People support what they helpcreate, and if you want a team
that thrives, start hiringpeople.
Start hiring people whocompliment your strengths and
cover your blind spots.
Start valuing relationships asmuch as results, and know that
(24:15):
the culture is built on trustand not titles and metrics
alone.
It's built on trust.
That they understand this seniorliving profession is just as
much a relationship builtbusiness as it is a real estate
built business, as it is aregulatory built business.
(24:38):
Because if you can align allthose things together, you have
a leader who understands.
If you can say that you're ahiring for a director of nursing
and your nursing expertise isgoing to be vital, but it's not
gonna be the only thing that'sgonna make you successful at
this community, what will makeyou successful at this
community?
(24:58):
It's understanding that you area vital role in the sales
process.
That you're a vital role inbuilding and developing the care
team to where they feelimportant and valued at every
step of the way.
That you're a vital role incommunicating what the
maintenance department needs todo to keep people safe, that
you're a vital role incommunicating to our family
(25:20):
members to make them feel safe.
That is what success looks likein a director of nursing role
here.
That's what you need to hirefor.
That's what your communityneeds.
So before every new hire, beforeevery interview that you do,
make sure that you know whatyour community needs, what
(25:43):
skills, both soft and hardskills that you're looking for,
and ask yourself, will thisperson lead when no one is
watching?
Because that's where the realwork is.
We all know that.
And can I trust them to growothers and not just execute the
tasks because we're moving intoa time inside of this profession
(26:10):
where it's much, much moreinvolved.
Where success is much more thantasks more than filling out an
assessment or doing a fire drillor making a phone call.
(26:31):
It's about creating impact.
It's about communicating value,and it's about ensuring that we
all understand the role that weplay in success.
'cause it's not a one persongame.
It's not a two person game.
And it certainly isn't a threeperson game.
It is the entire team workingtogether to get it done,
(26:56):
whatever it is.
And so when you go to hire, youwanna make sure that you hire
somebody that fits where youwanna go.
As a leader in the vision thatyou have, and that can align
their own personal values to thecompany or the community's
values.
It's really important softskills or is what is required to
(27:19):
succeed today in this seniorliving profession, in this
modern senior living professionthat we're living in.
And you have to intentionallylook for it.
And when you focus on strengths.
And leading from your strengthsand hiring for weaknesses,
letting somebody be strong inthe areas that you're weak and
(27:40):
allowing that to happen, that'swhen influence happens.
These are the influence basedleadership skills that you wanna
look for, and you don't evenhave to hire that out from
outside.
Look for it from within yourcommunity.
Start training for it now.
Build your bench because we'regonna need it.
(28:02):
So don't just hire people to dothe job.
Hire the people who will developothers to do it even better.
The best leaders don't add tasksto your plate.
The best leaders understand thattheir job is to build and
(28:23):
multiply.
Influence and effectiveness, soall of our plates can be freed
up.
The more we teach people how togrow and do the more freedom we
will have.
Your goal as a leader is tocreate the growth and
environment and your community,grow your people.
(28:46):
And watch your occupancy and NOIand retention rates grow shortly
after you start growing yourpeople.
It is just something that is acycle that doesn't stop and
speak to the 20% in the roomthat actually do the work and
(29:09):
move the needle of success.
Speak hope.
Speak life, speak possibilities,and watch how maybe 20% of the
80% that doesn't want to workgrow to the potential in the
room.
It starts with asking the rightquestions.
It starts with being intentionalwith what you're looking for,
(29:32):
and it starts with a mindsetshift from you that it will get
better because you are gettingbetter.
And that's what it requiresbecause a community is just a
community.
Until a great leader steps in,it makes it a great place to
(29:53):
live and work.
And that's you.
If this conversation, thisepisode resonates with you, feel
free to share this.
Thank you for listening.
I appreciate it.
We are opening up our next, newEd's playbook cohort.
I have a course out with AaronFish.
It's called the New Ed'sPlaybook, building an Impactful
(30:16):
Culture.
This is certainly part of that,and if you know a new leader or
somebody who wants to be anexecutive director or grow
within their leadership in thecurrent position they're in.
Send them my way, I'll be morethan happy to coach them.
Um, a lot of great things arebeing done in the coaching realm
in senior living, and it's beenexciting to be a part of that.
(30:39):
As for always to my listeners,aspire for more for you and if
you own your story, you willcreate the future that you want.
Till the next episode, have agreat rest of your day.
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