August 9, 2025 • 11 mins
Remember the last time you were supposed to be relaxing but couldn't shake that nagging feeling you should be doing something "productive" instead? That's exactly what this bite-sized episode tackles – our complicated relationship with true rest in a world obsessed with achievement.
Drawing from personal experience, I share how I once couldn't fully enjoy beautiful vacations because I was mentally trapped in what I "should" be accomplishing. Whether sitting on an Italian beach feeling guilty for not writing enough words toward my book, or returning from holidays feeling like I needed another break just to recover, I've learned that our approach to relaxation profoundly impacts our wellbeing. The good news? There's a better way.
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A note for every episode: we do not necessary agree with all the views on our podcast and leave listeners to make their own mind up with what they do or don't agree with.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
and it's going to be a bite-sized edition be
depending on if you're on thenorthern, southern eastern,
western hemisphere, you'll havedifferent weather.
It is summertime here, so I amgoing to call it the summertime
bites, but it's gonna.
I'm gonna make it as universalas I can so that those of you
wonderful listeners who are in adifferent part of the world
(00:22):
this still has relevance to you,for this show goes out to 1276
different cities worldwide, 94different countries worldwide,
and I always feel honored andhumbled that so many people
listen to it.
And with it being summer monthshere for the next few weeks,
(00:46):
I'm gonna offer some shorter butwiser podcasts.
And I was reflecting back towhen I was younger and, be it a
nice cozy winter weekend where Idecided to have a more relaxing
weekend, or be it on a nicesummer holiday somewhere warm, I
could never let myself fullyrelax because I was thinking
(01:07):
that I had to kind of be someoneor get somewhere or achieve
something.
And I remember being in abeautiful place somewhere way
back beautiful Italy andenjoying the days when I was
like outside, seeing, because Icould feel like I could really
fully go into the moment.
(01:28):
But, you know, the rest days inbetween.
That's why I kind of used tostruggle and it was like,
instead of enjoying some booksthat I would like to read, which
I hadn't read for a while, Ifelt like I was letting myself
down if I didn't write so manythousands of words towards
whatever book I was working onat the time or whatever I was
(01:50):
studying at the time, and then Iwould get a bit melancholic
because then I'd think, oh, thisholiday is just the moment, but
then I have to go back to reallife.
It was a bit ridiculous because, of course, whenever we've had
some sort of break, there's alittle bit of I call it like the
landing, in the sense that,like energetically, you felt a
(02:11):
bit free, and then, of course,you're going to feel a bit bumpy
when you come back to work.
But that's just life.
And I've realized that I hadn'tfully loved or embodied all
aspects of life because I hadthis really harsh judgment of
myself that I had to write andachieve things.
And don't get me wrong, I'm thekind of person that likes to do
(02:32):
things.
So I do find writing relaxing,I do find studying stuff
relaxing, but it's in moderation.
And the thing is on these restdays, when I was in these
beautiful places where I wasn'tgoing out sightseeing.
I would have benefited more ifI could have been a bit more in
the moment.
(02:52):
And also I found as I got olderthat if I break things down so
maybe I do want to have a bit oftime to do creative stuff, but
I'll do that for an hour andthen maybe I'll rest and then
I'll read some fiction and notfeel guilty for reading fiction,
because I feel like I should beputting something more
(03:13):
intellectual into one's mind.
And I also find that if I maketime for things like yoga, yoga,
some kind of exercise, and timejust to simply be and watch the
nature or watch life goes past,then I get a lot more out of
that break.
(03:33):
And then when I was younger, Iwould sometimes go on holidays
with my friends and obviously Iwas young so we'd have drinks
every night.
And again, I'm not saying thatdrinking like you can't have fun
and have drinking, but therewere some holidays that I
literally was out so much that Ineeded another holiday to kind
(03:53):
of get over it.
And as I got older and mylifestyle changed and I felt
more peaceful doing things thatwere a bit more holistic,
reflected back.
I would have got a lot more outof it just if I went on a
friend's holiday.
We went out one night, had anice night out somewhere, and
(04:14):
then balanced out with like morepeaceful and quiet times,
because I feel like we've onlylife is getting more stranger,
like the political scene wewon't get into politics, but is.
The world has become a verydifferent place from when I was
younger and I just feel thatwe're getting kind of more
(04:36):
crushed and condensed anddemanded to be a certain way,
and the only way we can get oursovereignty back is to find ways
to care for ourselves.
So I really don't recommendlooking at the news first thing
at night or last thing at night,and I recommend looking at in
(04:57):
moderation because I know thatcan cause stress also, like all
the violence that's films andstuff.
Maybe you've got the kind ofmind that can watch these kind
of movies and then switch off,then great.
But if you're sensitive, thenjust don't do it.
When you go on holiday,sometimes if you're a group of
people, it feels like there'spressure to please everyone.
(05:18):
Maybe you have a day foryourself and you do what you
wish to do, and if it's like thewinter months where you are and
it's not so nice to go out.
Could you do like an all sensesmeal where you go and pick,
like you pick a recipe whichencompasses all the different
(05:38):
colored vegetables, etc.
Your favorite food, and you,you mindfully and slowly prepare
this food, look, taking in thetextures, the tastes, the smell,
even like the sounds, whenyou're like cooking, and how
does that feel?
And you could curl up for likea nice hot drink and a nice book
(06:00):
or, if not, a novel, somethingelse that you like to read.
So I'm trying to kind ofinspire you to stay away from
what's easiest and I can do itsometimes as well, like watch,
gardening things, and.
But the thing is we spend somuch on time online.
Tell me like listen to apodcast, music, something else,
(06:25):
rather than being on a computerall the time.
So this is very simple.
I'm sure you already know thisinformation, but it's like
bite-sized information to helpyou through either the winter or
the summer, where it is hereand it gets hot and sticky
because we're just not used tothe hot weather and it's getting
(06:46):
hotter here all the time, or itmight be cold where you are, or
maybe you relish the heat andyou find the winter difficult.
Either way, can you find thingsto be grateful for in that day
that are going to help youthrough this time and help you
free this time and help you feela bit more alive and connected.
There's a special bite-sizedmeditation to help you through
(07:08):
the summer months.
Top tips for the meditation iseither sit nice and cross-legged
on the floor with a nicestraight back Always nice to sit
on a block or a cushion,although that's not available
for you.
You sit in a chair with theback nice and straight.
The important thing is you'renot slouching and if you're
(07:29):
doing something that requiresyour concentration, all you need
to do is just pause this andyou can reconvene the meditation
at a time that is good for you.
If you're doing the meditation,let's begin.
So here's the simple meditationthat you can do and you're just
going to close your eyes andyou're just going to take some
(07:49):
slow, calm, deep breaths, andthe simplicity in this is being
in the moment.
So you're just going to feelyour inhalation and your
exhalation, trying to breathe ina calm and loving way.
So you're not rushing.
(08:10):
You're kind of feeling a nicehealthy balance as you inhale
and you exhale in and outthrough the nostrils.
You allow yourself to feel calmand you listen.
You simply listen to what soundsyou can hear, even if you're in
(08:37):
a place that's really quiet.
You can hear, even if you're ina place that's really quiet.
What sounds can you hear inthat place?
Are they loud, are they distant?
Are they nearby?
Are they repetitive?
(09:06):
Do you know what all the soundsare?
Or are some a mystery?
And what can you feel with yourhands?
So you touch the ground.
What's around you?
As you open the eyes, you cantouch it around and see what's
around.
What does that feel like?
And as your eyes are open, whatcan you see in the room?
Is anything that you haven'tnoticed before?
(09:27):
And, without judgment, you cankind of look and think oh,
there's a mark on the wall there.
Oh, there's a picture here,there's this, there's that, and
what can you smell?
Close your eyes again and whatcan you smell with your nose,
and then you can stick out yourtongue and imagine what the room
(09:48):
tastes like, and then you canfeel from your inner being how
this environment makes you feelwithout your doing.
But do you feel calmer, do youfeel softer?
Do you feel more able to goabout your day, so feel free to
(10:15):
sit longer in this, but it is abite-sized edition, so I'm going
to bring you back into themoment, back back into the now.
But any point during the dayand you've got somewhere
peaceful to sit, you can justtry and observe everything
that's around you and that canhelp bring you into this
(10:37):
bite-sized moment.
and it's going to be a bite-sized edition be
depending on if you're on thenorthern, southern eastern,
western hemisphere, you'll havedifferent weather.
It is summertime here, so I amgoing to call it the summertime
bites, but it's gonna.
I'm gonna make it as universalas I can so that those of you
wonderful listeners who are in adifferent part of the world
(00:22):
this still has relevance to you,for this show goes out to 1276
different cities worldwide, 94different countries worldwide,
and I always feel honored andhumbled that so many people
listen to it.
And with it being summer monthshere for the next few weeks,
(00:46):
I'm gonna offer some shorter butwiser podcasts.
And I was reflecting back towhen I was younger and, be it a
nice cozy winter weekend where Idecided to have a more relaxing
weekend, or be it on a nicesummer holiday somewhere warm, I
could never let myself fullyrelax because I was thinking
(01:07):
that I had to kind of be someoneor get somewhere or achieve
something.
And I remember being in abeautiful place somewhere way
back beautiful Italy andenjoying the days when I was
like outside, seeing, because Icould feel like I could really
fully go into the moment.
(01:28):
But, you know, the rest days inbetween.
That's why I kind of used tostruggle and it was like,
instead of enjoying some booksthat I would like to read, which
I hadn't read for a while, Ifelt like I was letting myself
down if I didn't write so manythousands of words towards
whatever book I was working onat the time or whatever I was
(01:50):
studying at the time, and then Iwould get a bit melancholic
because then I'd think, oh, thisholiday is just the moment, but
then I have to go back to reallife.
It was a bit ridiculous because, of course, whenever we've had
some sort of break, there's alittle bit of I call it like the
landing, in the sense that,like energetically, you felt a
(02:11):
bit free, and then, of course,you're going to feel a bit bumpy
when you come back to work.
But that's just life.
And I've realized that I hadn'tfully loved or embodied all
aspects of life because I hadthis really harsh judgment of
myself that I had to write andachieve things.
And don't get me wrong, I'm thekind of person that likes to do
(02:32):
things.
So I do find writing relaxing,I do find studying stuff
relaxing, but it's in moderation.
And the thing is on these restdays, when I was in these
beautiful places where I wasn'tgoing out sightseeing.
I would have benefited more ifI could have been a bit more in
the moment.
(02:52):
And also I found as I got olderthat if I break things down so
maybe I do want to have a bit oftime to do creative stuff, but
I'll do that for an hour andthen maybe I'll rest and then
I'll read some fiction and notfeel guilty for reading fiction,
because I feel like I should beputting something more
(03:13):
intellectual into one's mind.
And I also find that if I maketime for things like yoga, yoga,
some kind of exercise, and timejust to simply be and watch the
nature or watch life goes past,then I get a lot more out of
that break.
(03:33):
And then when I was younger, Iwould sometimes go on holidays
with my friends and obviously Iwas young so we'd have drinks
every night.
And again, I'm not saying thatdrinking like you can't have fun
and have drinking, but therewere some holidays that I
literally was out so much that Ineeded another holiday to kind
(03:53):
of get over it.
And as I got older and mylifestyle changed and I felt
more peaceful doing things thatwere a bit more holistic,
reflected back.
I would have got a lot more outof it just if I went on a
friend's holiday.
We went out one night, had anice night out somewhere, and
(04:14):
then balanced out with like morepeaceful and quiet times,
because I feel like we've onlylife is getting more stranger,
like the political scene wewon't get into politics, but is.
The world has become a verydifferent place from when I was
younger and I just feel thatwe're getting kind of more
(04:36):
crushed and condensed anddemanded to be a certain way,
and the only way we can get oursovereignty back is to find ways
to care for ourselves.
So I really don't recommendlooking at the news first thing
at night or last thing at night,and I recommend looking at in
(04:57):
moderation because I know thatcan cause stress also, like all
the violence that's films andstuff.
Maybe you've got the kind ofmind that can watch these kind
of movies and then switch off,then great.
But if you're sensitive, thenjust don't do it.
When you go on holiday,sometimes if you're a group of
people, it feels like there'spressure to please everyone.
(05:18):
Maybe you have a day foryourself and you do what you
wish to do, and if it's like thewinter months where you are and
it's not so nice to go out.
Could you do like an all sensesmeal where you go and pick,
like you pick a recipe whichencompasses all the different
(05:38):
colored vegetables, etc.
Your favorite food, and you,you mindfully and slowly prepare
this food, look, taking in thetextures, the tastes, the smell,
even like the sounds, whenyou're like cooking, and how
does that feel?
And you could curl up for likea nice hot drink and a nice book
(06:00):
or, if not, a novel, somethingelse that you like to read.
So I'm trying to kind ofinspire you to stay away from
what's easiest and I can do itsometimes as well, like watch,
gardening things, and.
But the thing is we spend somuch on time online.
Tell me like listen to apodcast, music, something else,
(06:25):
rather than being on a computerall the time.
So this is very simple.
I'm sure you already know thisinformation, but it's like
bite-sized information to helpyou through either the winter or
the summer, where it is hereand it gets hot and sticky
because we're just not used tothe hot weather and it's getting
(06:46):
hotter here all the time, or itmight be cold where you are, or
maybe you relish the heat andyou find the winter difficult.
Either way, can you find thingsto be grateful for in that day
that are going to help youthrough this time and help you
free this time and help you feela bit more alive and connected.
There's a special bite-sizedmeditation to help you through
(07:08):
the summer months.
Top tips for the meditation iseither sit nice and cross-legged
on the floor with a nicestraight back Always nice to sit
on a block or a cushion,although that's not available
for you.
You sit in a chair with theback nice and straight.
The important thing is you'renot slouching and if you're
(07:29):
doing something that requiresyour concentration, all you need
to do is just pause this andyou can reconvene the meditation
at a time that is good for you.
If you're doing the meditation,let's begin.
So here's the simple meditationthat you can do and you're just
going to close your eyes andyou're just going to take some
(07:49):
slow, calm, deep breaths, andthe simplicity in this is being
in the moment.
So you're just going to feelyour inhalation and your
exhalation, trying to breathe ina calm and loving way.
So you're not rushing.
(08:10):
You're kind of feeling a nicehealthy balance as you inhale
and you exhale in and outthrough the nostrils.
You allow yourself to feel calmand you listen.
You simply listen to what soundsyou can hear, even if you're in
(08:37):
a place that's really quiet.
You can hear, even if you're ina place that's really quiet.
What sounds can you hear inthat place?
Are they loud, are they distant?
Are they nearby?
Are they repetitive?
(09:06):
Do you know what all the soundsare?
Or are some a mystery?
And what can you feel with yourhands?
So you touch the ground.
What's around you?
As you open the eyes, you cantouch it around and see what's
around.
What does that feel like?
And as your eyes are open, whatcan you see in the room?
Is anything that you haven'tnoticed before?
(09:27):
And, without judgment, you cankind of look and think oh,
there's a mark on the wall there.
Oh, there's a picture here,there's this, there's that, and
what can you smell?
Close your eyes again and whatcan you smell with your nose,
and then you can stick out yourtongue and imagine what the room
(09:48):
tastes like, and then you canfeel from your inner being how
this environment makes you feelwithout your doing.
But do you feel calmer, do youfeel softer?
Do you feel more able to goabout your day, so feel free to
(10:15):
sit longer in this, but it is abite-sized edition, so I'm going
to bring you back into themoment, back back into the now.
But any point during the dayand you've got somewhere
peaceful to sit, you can justtry and observe everything
that's around you and that canhelp bring you into this
(10:37):
bite-sized moment.
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