October 29, 2025 • 14 mins
When the Halloween nights draw in, we look for light—on our porches, in our memories, and in the people who raised us or perhaps didn't. This conversation steps into Samhain, the Celtic end of summer and midpoint between equinox and solstice. Bonfires, pumpkins and daily moments of gratitude for our ancestors.
The heart of the episode is emotional validation—how to listen without agreeing, how to reflect feelings with simple, caring language, and how to reduce defensiveness so real dialogue can happen. You’ll hear practical phrases you can use today, guidance for pausing before you react, and a reminder that different backgrounds shape what feels heavy or light.
To anchor it all, we guide a gentle autumn meditation: a safe, misty forest, a pumpkin‑lit path, a clear well where gratitude rises.
If this resonated, follow the show, share it with someone who needs a calmer conversation, and leave a quick review so more listeners can find us.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:00):
We are a couple of days from what is wildly known
as Halloween, which is only afew days away.
However, the Celts for over2,000 years had called it
Semein, because Semein means endof summer and it is basically
the halfway point between theautumn equinox and the winter
(00:25):
solstice.
And traditionally, with likebonfires, it was a time to
honour our ancestors, and it wassaid to be a time when the veils
were very thin between our worldand that world of our ancestors,
etc.
And hence why we burn bonfires,and probably why the pumpkins,
(00:50):
because they're having a lightlike that is there to help ward
off evil spirits, etc.
But it's a real magical time togo within and honour our
ancestors.
We used to celebrate Guy Fox,which is the 5th of November,
which is quite close toHalloween or something.
(01:10):
It used to be all about the 5thof November, but now in my
lifetime, like I said, it'schanged.
So as we come up to this run-upbetween Halloween and the winter
solstice, I invite you to findfive minutes on of each day to
just sit down and thank yourancestors, all those that came
(01:31):
before us.
And of course, the world hasbecome even more, it's got
become even more kind ofcompressed and dystorpian in my
lifetime.
I have really noticed howstrange the world has become,
and this formal like way oftrying to steer clear of any
(01:53):
politics, but worldwide, of howwe have been given this
addiction of a smartphone, andhow there is so it's such a gift
in so many ways because it's somuch information at our
fingertips, and yet what is theright information?
And it's become a lot harder tokind of trust in great big
(02:14):
institutions that like we usedto, and instead the world has a
lot of bad going on in it, andwe could just sit here and talk
about that for ages, and ofcourse, there is so much bad in
the world, but I invite you tolift your vibration, lift the
vibrations of those around youby trying to see the good in the
(02:35):
world, the good in the people,the good that there is, and
which is not always an easytask, but of course, misery
sells stories, and grief sellsstories, and it's not to have
blinkers to what's going on inthe world.
I'm not saying that, but I'msaying, can you put this time to
remember your ancestors and alsofind ways to lift your
(02:58):
vibration, see the goodness inpeople, see the goodness in
yourself, see the silver liningand things, and try and focus on
what is good in the worldbecause then that's gonna help
lift our vibration.
As I'm getting older, I'mlearning to try and see the good
parts of people, not to say thatyou should tolerate bad things,
and if someone's a really badenergy vampire, then you know
(03:22):
you've got to put yourboundaries up, and it's not
about letting people walk allover you, but it is about trying
to see the goodness in all.
I feel maybe you disagree, maybeyou agree.
It's not when I share my words,it's not so that you have to
(03:42):
agree or disagree, it's kind ofdone from a way so you can have
critical thinking.
I also wanted to put intotoday's show about emotional
validation.
Maybe there's times where youdidn't feel that your emotions
were validated.
When your emotions are notvalidated, you could have shared
(04:03):
something with loved ones,friends, even a work colleague
where you were kind of beingvulnerable in a sense that you
were saying how you werefeeling, and when people don't
listen and say, Oh, things likeyou're overreacting, or what is
it, grow backbone, or kind ofyou're too sensitive, all things
(04:26):
like that, that is immediatelylike a sweeping cut across what
you are trying to share, but theother person does not
necessarily have to agree withyou, right?
And they might see things from adifferent point of view, but
(04:47):
whether you're validatingsomeone else or you're being
validated, you the best thingthat you can do is to listen.
So if you feel like you'reyou're just saying, Oh, I just
feel a bit upset by this,instead of someone saying, Oh,
don't be so stupid, get over it,they could say something like,
(05:11):
Oh, I understand that you feelyou must feel upset about this.
I bet that doesn't feel so goodto you, does it?
etc.
So it doesn't mean that you haveto, it's not that you have to
agree with what the person'ssaying, but the best things you
can do is to really kind oflisten and just pay attention to
how what they're saying and showempathy, and like as a share,
(05:36):
try and reflect back to them soyou can say, Oh, that must sound
disappointing, as an example, ifsomeone feels upset because they
didn't get a job, or and you cansay things like oh, I've got a
feeling that you might befeeling a bit upset, or you
might be feeling a bit anxious,or something like oh, you must
be feeling or I've got a feelingyou must be feeling frustrated.
(05:59):
You could say things like, Oh,it's really I I completely
understand that you're upset,and things like oh this must
feel quite a big thing to you,and then let them talk it
through, say to them that mustfeel hurtful.
It's okay, let them know it'sokay to be upset, and you can
see why they feel that way, soit's not so that they can wallow
(06:22):
in it, and also it's not so thatthey blame you or a situation,
you might completely disagreewith them on this situation, but
the the one thing I feel withpeople is that they're not heard
so that their emotions aren'tvalidated, and if you're trying
to share with someone andthey're just cutting you down,
just say to them, Oh, can youplease listen to what I'm
(06:46):
saying?
And my so my feelings makesense.
I think half the time we'retrying to defend ourselves so we
kind of don't listen to theother person of how they may
need their feelings validated,and it's all about having a
pause, and then maybe theperson, if you're directly
talking to the person, they canthen share and you can validate
(07:07):
their feelings, and you canalways agree to disagree, but I
think a lot of the time is amisunderstanding and
communications, and and and alsoyou think about what backgrounds
we all come from, we've all haddifferent childhoods, so we've
all got different things thatmay one thing might feel
completely stressful to someoneelse and completely easy to
(07:28):
someone else, and it's a comingfrom a place where we don't
judge and we're a little bitkinder to each other.
So as we come into thiswonderful time of Sameen, the
halfway point between the autumnequinox and winter solstice,
(07:48):
it's a time to honor ourancestors, it's a time to let go
of stuff that no longer servesus, it's a time to kind of build
our protection in the sense thatwe maybe we do a pumpkin, maybe
we kind of sit and be, and it'sa time for conscious
(08:08):
conversations, and the best wayto have a conscious conversation
in this period, in my opinion,is to validate each other's
feelings.
So, just to recap, it's notabout blaming each other, it's
not about one person beingright, the other person being
wrong, it's about listening,understanding, validating the
(08:30):
person's feeling, letting themknow they understand, and just
listening for a bit, and then ifyou want to share your side,
then you can go about sharing itafterwards, agreeing to
disagree, but understanding thatwe're all different and where
our feelings come from.
So, I hope this was of help toyou today.
(08:51):
It was my honour to share thiswith you, and I'm going to give
you a nice autumn meditation.
Top tips for the meditation iseither sit nice and cross-legged
on the floor with a nicestraight back, always nice to
sit on a block or a cushion, orthat's not available for you.
You sit in a chair with the backnice and straight.
(09:13):
The important thing is you'renot slouching.
And if you're doing somethingthat requires legal
concentration, all you need todo is just pause this and you
can reconvene the meditation ata time that is good for you.
If you're doing the meditation,that's fatiguing.
So as you close your eyes inthis mystical, misty Samian
(09:38):
time, can you be open to beingin the moment?
Your eyes are closed, and youimagine that you are in a safe
but mystical, maybe slightlyeerie woods.
(10:00):
It is a main and the moon isn'thigh, so there's just a lent
gentle bit of light.
You see lots of deers in thedistance, and your path is lit
(10:27):
by pumpkins.
And as you walk along thisbeautiful path, the misty
slightly eerie, but safer andbeautiful night sky forest.
You see a badger in thedistance, such a misunderstood
(10:50):
creature.
You hear the rustles of mice andall of the little creatures that
come out, nocturnal creaturesthat like to eat at night, as
they nervously look around,waiting for a moment to move to
(11:12):
the next place.
But you are focused on thispath, and you walk along this
path, you are protected by thelight of these wonderful
pumpkins, and as you gingerlymake your steps, the ground has
a slightly crunching sound asyou walk along this beautiful
(11:34):
path, and as you come to the endof the path, there is a
beautiful well, but this well iskind of lit up with pumpkins, so
you can see the bottom of it,and there's a light in the
bottom too, and this isbeautiful crystal clear water.
(11:56):
I invite you, dear meditator, tolook into the water and from
your heart just utter some wordsthat if you could say to any of
your ancestors to thank them forthe wondrous thing that they did
(12:18):
for you in this life, then toshare it and to send gratitude,
love, light, and healing.
Whatever it is, and just sitthere for a moment, allowing
(12:42):
their love to come up from thewell and cascade around you,
wrapping a warming, comfortinghug, knowing that no matter
what, whatever life puts yourway, you have the skills to tap
(13:03):
into their energy, their healinglove, and their light, and to
show your immense gratitude tothem.
So I send to you, dear one, loveand light, healing and change as
you slowly now come back intothe room saying goodbye to the
(13:28):
well, come back into the moment,come back into the now.
We are a couple of days from what is wildly known
as Halloween, which is only afew days away.
However, the Celts for over2,000 years had called it
Semein, because Semein means endof summer and it is basically
the halfway point between theautumn equinox and the winter
(00:25):
solstice.
And traditionally, with likebonfires, it was a time to
honour our ancestors, and it wassaid to be a time when the veils
were very thin between our worldand that world of our ancestors,
etc.
And hence why we burn bonfires,and probably why the pumpkins,
(00:50):
because they're having a lightlike that is there to help ward
off evil spirits, etc.
But it's a real magical time togo within and honour our
ancestors.
We used to celebrate Guy Fox,which is the 5th of November,
which is quite close toHalloween or something.
(01:10):
It used to be all about the 5thof November, but now in my
lifetime, like I said, it'schanged.
So as we come up to this run-upbetween Halloween and the winter
solstice, I invite you to findfive minutes on of each day to
just sit down and thank yourancestors, all those that came
(01:31):
before us.
And of course, the world hasbecome even more, it's got
become even more kind ofcompressed and dystorpian in my
lifetime.
I have really noticed howstrange the world has become,
and this formal like way oftrying to steer clear of any
(01:53):
politics, but worldwide, of howwe have been given this
addiction of a smartphone, andhow there is so it's such a gift
in so many ways because it's somuch information at our
fingertips, and yet what is theright information?
And it's become a lot harder tokind of trust in great big
(02:14):
institutions that like we usedto, and instead the world has a
lot of bad going on in it, andwe could just sit here and talk
about that for ages, and ofcourse, there is so much bad in
the world, but I invite you tolift your vibration, lift the
vibrations of those around youby trying to see the good in the
(02:35):
world, the good in the people,the good that there is, and
which is not always an easytask, but of course, misery
sells stories, and grief sellsstories, and it's not to have
blinkers to what's going on inthe world.
I'm not saying that, but I'msaying, can you put this time to
remember your ancestors and alsofind ways to lift your
(02:58):
vibration, see the goodness inpeople, see the goodness in
yourself, see the silver liningand things, and try and focus on
what is good in the worldbecause then that's gonna help
lift our vibration.
As I'm getting older, I'mlearning to try and see the good
parts of people, not to say thatyou should tolerate bad things,
and if someone's a really badenergy vampire, then you know
(03:22):
you've got to put yourboundaries up, and it's not
about letting people walk allover you, but it is about trying
to see the goodness in all.
I feel maybe you disagree, maybeyou agree.
It's not when I share my words,it's not so that you have to
(03:42):
agree or disagree, it's kind ofdone from a way so you can have
critical thinking.
I also wanted to put intotoday's show about emotional
validation.
Maybe there's times where youdidn't feel that your emotions
were validated.
When your emotions are notvalidated, you could have shared
(04:03):
something with loved ones,friends, even a work colleague
where you were kind of beingvulnerable in a sense that you
were saying how you werefeeling, and when people don't
listen and say, Oh, things likeyou're overreacting, or what is
it, grow backbone, or kind ofyou're too sensitive, all things
(04:26):
like that, that is immediatelylike a sweeping cut across what
you are trying to share, but theother person does not
necessarily have to agree withyou, right?
And they might see things from adifferent point of view, but
(04:47):
whether you're validatingsomeone else or you're being
validated, you the best thingthat you can do is to listen.
So if you feel like you'reyou're just saying, Oh, I just
feel a bit upset by this,instead of someone saying, Oh,
don't be so stupid, get over it,they could say something like,
(05:11):
Oh, I understand that you feelyou must feel upset about this.
I bet that doesn't feel so goodto you, does it?
etc.
So it doesn't mean that you haveto, it's not that you have to
agree with what the person'ssaying, but the best things you
can do is to really kind oflisten and just pay attention to
how what they're saying and showempathy, and like as a share,
(05:36):
try and reflect back to them soyou can say, Oh, that must sound
disappointing, as an example, ifsomeone feels upset because they
didn't get a job, or and you cansay things like oh, I've got a
feeling that you might befeeling a bit upset, or you
might be feeling a bit anxious,or something like oh, you must
be feeling or I've got a feelingyou must be feeling frustrated.
(05:59):
You could say things like, Oh,it's really I I completely
understand that you're upset,and things like oh this must
feel quite a big thing to you,and then let them talk it
through, say to them that mustfeel hurtful.
It's okay, let them know it'sokay to be upset, and you can
see why they feel that way, soit's not so that they can wallow
(06:22):
in it, and also it's not so thatthey blame you or a situation,
you might completely disagreewith them on this situation, but
the the one thing I feel withpeople is that they're not heard
so that their emotions aren'tvalidated, and if you're trying
to share with someone andthey're just cutting you down,
just say to them, Oh, can youplease listen to what I'm
(06:46):
saying?
And my so my feelings makesense.
I think half the time we'retrying to defend ourselves so we
kind of don't listen to theother person of how they may
need their feelings validated,and it's all about having a
pause, and then maybe theperson, if you're directly
talking to the person, they canthen share and you can validate
(07:07):
their feelings, and you canalways agree to disagree, but I
think a lot of the time is amisunderstanding and
communications, and and and alsoyou think about what backgrounds
we all come from, we've all haddifferent childhoods, so we've
all got different things thatmay one thing might feel
completely stressful to someoneelse and completely easy to
(07:28):
someone else, and it's a comingfrom a place where we don't
judge and we're a little bitkinder to each other.
So as we come into thiswonderful time of Sameen, the
halfway point between the autumnequinox and winter solstice,
(07:48):
it's a time to honor ourancestors, it's a time to let go
of stuff that no longer servesus, it's a time to kind of build
our protection in the sense thatwe maybe we do a pumpkin, maybe
we kind of sit and be, and it'sa time for conscious
(08:08):
conversations, and the best wayto have a conscious conversation
in this period, in my opinion,is to validate each other's
feelings.
So, just to recap, it's notabout blaming each other, it's
not about one person beingright, the other person being
wrong, it's about listening,understanding, validating the
(08:30):
person's feeling, letting themknow they understand, and just
listening for a bit, and then ifyou want to share your side,
then you can go about sharing itafterwards, agreeing to
disagree, but understanding thatwe're all different and where
our feelings come from.
So, I hope this was of help toyou today.
(08:51):
It was my honour to share thiswith you, and I'm going to give
you a nice autumn meditation.
Top tips for the meditation iseither sit nice and cross-legged
on the floor with a nicestraight back, always nice to
sit on a block or a cushion, orthat's not available for you.
You sit in a chair with the backnice and straight.
(09:13):
The important thing is you'renot slouching.
And if you're doing somethingthat requires legal
concentration, all you need todo is just pause this and you
can reconvene the meditation ata time that is good for you.
If you're doing the meditation,that's fatiguing.
So as you close your eyes inthis mystical, misty Samian
(09:38):
time, can you be open to beingin the moment?
Your eyes are closed, and youimagine that you are in a safe
but mystical, maybe slightlyeerie woods.
(10:00):
It is a main and the moon isn'thigh, so there's just a lent
gentle bit of light.
You see lots of deers in thedistance, and your path is lit
(10:27):
by pumpkins.
And as you walk along thisbeautiful path, the misty
slightly eerie, but safer andbeautiful night sky forest.
You see a badger in thedistance, such a misunderstood
(10:50):
creature.
You hear the rustles of mice andall of the little creatures that
come out, nocturnal creaturesthat like to eat at night, as
they nervously look around,waiting for a moment to move to
(11:12):
the next place.
But you are focused on thispath, and you walk along this
path, you are protected by thelight of these wonderful
pumpkins, and as you gingerlymake your steps, the ground has
a slightly crunching sound asyou walk along this beautiful
(11:34):
path, and as you come to the endof the path, there is a
beautiful well, but this well iskind of lit up with pumpkins, so
you can see the bottom of it,and there's a light in the
bottom too, and this isbeautiful crystal clear water.
(11:56):
I invite you, dear meditator, tolook into the water and from
your heart just utter some wordsthat if you could say to any of
your ancestors to thank them forthe wondrous thing that they did
(12:18):
for you in this life, then toshare it and to send gratitude,
love, light, and healing.
Whatever it is, and just sitthere for a moment, allowing
(12:42):
their love to come up from thewell and cascade around you,
wrapping a warming, comfortinghug, knowing that no matter
what, whatever life puts yourway, you have the skills to tap
(13:03):
into their energy, their healinglove, and their light, and to
show your immense gratitude tothem.
So I send to you, dear one, loveand light, healing and change as
you slowly now come back intothe room saying goodbye to the
(13:28):
well, come back into the moment,come back into the now.
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