S1 Ep #8: Being African American in a Liberal State

Host Z and Host Jess sit down with Shenita and Todd Moore to discuss their lives and experiences growing up in a state that considers itself Liberal. 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to awaken in America, two m inds on
a journey to create d ialogueabout diversity, inclusion and
optimism.
Hello,

Speaker 2 (00:13):
Wakened.
Thanks for joining us againtoday, we look forward to
presenting to you beingAfrican-American in a liberal
state.
We'll have some guests on todaywho will be sharing their
experiences of living in twoliberal cities in California and
looking at their lives fromchildhood to adulthood.

(00:36):
I may also share a fewexperiences of my own.
We look forward to enlighteningyou as usual, and we hope that
these stories resonate with youbecause t hey a re true.
Take care, be safe and be well.

Speaker 3 (00:51):
Well, awakened hope.
Everybody's doing great.
It's your hosts, Jess and Z.
And we are so excited to haveour guests on today.
We have the lovely couple ofShanita and Todd Maura with us.
If you want to say hi to ourlisteners,

Speaker 2 (01:08):
Hello nurse.
Hi,

Speaker 3 (01:11):
And we just a quick introduction on Janita and Todd.
They are West coast based.
They are parents of two lovelyteenage daughters, and they've
been married almost 20 years.
It's 18 and a half.
Shanita is an actress and Toddhas a career in the n onprofit
industry.
And the way that we actually gotconnected is through a woman.

(01:34):
I used to hang out with at thepark with our little kids and we
moved neighborhoods.
But before we moved, she told meabout this amazing organization
called children's clothinggiveaway.
And at the time I was h ad a lotof baby stuff and my kids had
outgrown and I didn't reallyknow what the best place for it
was.
And she said, there's thisamazing woman named Shanita who
started this organization.

(01:54):
And she will come to your houseand pick up what you have, that
you are no longer using and thengive it to families in need.
And, um, you know, I live in LA,so that all sounded amazing to
me.
And I'm thinking like, who isthis angel of a person that will
just show up and do that for mein her free time?
And then I met her and sheactually is a real life angel.

(02:14):
And so she and her husband,Todd, this is actually what they
do in their free time.
They service families in need.
I think the organization isactually expanding to service
people outside of California,even.
So that's super exciting, but itis called children's clothing
giveaway.
And the website where you canlearn more about this is www dot

(02:36):
children's clothing,giveaway.org.
And I don't know if you guyswant to say a few words about
kind of how you started theorganization itself and any
items that you're looking forwith the holidays around the
corner or anything like that?
Well, the organization

Speaker 1 (02:52):
Was actually spawn from

Speaker 2 (02:55):
Just having an excess of children's items when our
daughters

Speaker 4 (03:00):
Were younger at the time, the church that we go to,
a lot of the women there hadchildren around the same age.
So a group of us had an idea tohave kind of like a, an exchange
where we would bring things thatwe weren't using anymore, or our
children had grown out of and wewould exchange them amongst each

(03:20):
other.
And so we did this a couple oftimes and what I seem to notice
was the pattern or the trend wasthat afterwards I was left with
all of the leftover items thatno one wanted to take back home.
And so the first couple of timesI t ook them like t o like
Goodwill or like other, my localn onprofits.

(03:42):
And what I found was that, youknow, of course a t Goodwill,
they were selling them.
But then at these other nonprofits, they were also doing
the same, like they had likelittle stores and they would
sell the items.
And I said, you know, it'sreally kind of unfair that the
people that would need theseitems have to now purchase them
rather than just having someonegive them to them.
Right.
So kind of where it all started,it started at our church and it

(04:06):
started with these moms.
And then it kind of just grewinto this event that we do twice
a year.
Our, of course, this year, wehaven't been able to do it, but
leading up to this year, we weredoing it twice, sometimes three
times a year.
And one thing that I can say iswe've never had a shortage of
donations.
We've always had enough for theamount of people that have ended

(04:30):
up coming to these events andeveryone leaves with more than
what they even came or expected,y ou k now, to get as far as, I
mean, clothing, anything thatyou can imagine for your
children, cribs toys, stuffedanimals, diapers, formula, you
know, just the whole gamut ofwhat you would need for your
children.

Speaker 5 (04:51):
And what we've learned doing this is a lot of
generous people out there thatwant to help, but they just
don't know necessarily thatwe're aware.
And, um, you know, we've met alot of wonderful people freely
and gladly give.
So, um, it's just been ablessing all the way around.
And, um, you know, when the NiaShanita where new parents, you

(05:12):
know, financially with a new kidand stuff like that, it was kind
of beating us up.
And we always wanted anorganization that would, you
know, freely give stuff likethat and it didn't exist.
So you know how they say, uh,you know, uh, necessities is the
mother of invention.
So we need, we were in need oursales.

(05:34):
And we were able to come up withthis, this idea of gifting
people, things that you don'teven use anymore.
So, you know, why not letsomebody else with it?
You know, and children'ssupplies, the children grow up
so fast, they go through thatstuff so fast and for you to pay
full price for something, andyou're only gonna use for a few
months.
It's like, it really doesn'tmake sense, you know?

(05:56):
And so along

Speaker 4 (05:58):
Those same lines, because we are still kind of at
the level where we are, wereally don't have a lot of grant
funding.
So we don't have to go throughthe whole process of what a lot
of nonprofits have to do.
So like a lot of people willsay, so I can just take this.
I don't need to like, prove toyou that I needed.
I don't want to have to fill outpaperwork.

(06:18):
I don't have to show you my ID.
I don't have to, you know what Iknow, you know, we are giving
this to people who say to us,they're in need.
If you're not in need and you goand do something else with this,
guess what?
That's on you not going toaffect us.
It's on you.
If you're being shady and doingthings that you shouldn't be
doing, you know, I'm not goingto worry about it.

(06:39):
And my intentions are to helppeople who are in need.
So if you're taking advantage ofthat, then you're going to have
to answer for it.
In my opinion, you know, as aChristian, I'm saying, you're
going to have to answer for that.
You know, if you're beingshiesty or whatever, but yeah.
So that's basically how we gotstarted.
And now we have, I mean, on bothends of it, we don't have to go

(07:00):
looking for donations anymore.
And we also don't have to golooking for families because
everyone kind of comes to us.
We just have to link it up.
We have social workers thatreach out to us.
And like Jesse was saying, nowwe have people in other States
that will say, you know, can youplease help out this family?
We're an organization.
We don't really know where to goto help them, you know, get

(07:21):
clothing for their children.
And winter's coming, they eatcodes that, you know, what
choose things like that.
And we can kind of pull from oursupply and, you know, box it up.
And for example, this lastrequest that we filled for
something like that out ofstate, they were in Missouri who
were going back and forth.
And I was saying, you know, wecan get all these things
together, but it's probablygoing to cost you about 60,$65

(07:43):
to ship it out.
I said, we can ship it.
Or you guys can pay for theshipping since we're sending it
to you.
And my oldest daughter heard theconversation and when I was done
talking to them or messagingthem, I can't remember if it was
like reading an email andtalking to them on the phone.
She goes, mommy, I'll pay forit.
And I said, what do you mean?
She says, I'll pay to ship thebox to them.
And I was like, are you sure oflike, it's going to cost a lot.

(08:04):
She's like, no, yeah, I'll doit.
And she did it.
And it kind of, you know, ittouched both of us cause we were
like, okay, we're doingsomething right.
If our child's who kind ofhelped spawn this idea for us,
you know, when she was just ababy and didn't even know it, if
she now at 18 has that samespirit of Iranian people.
Yeah.
So it really, it was really,yeah.

Speaker 3 (08:28):
Great job, mom and dad.
Yeah.
And then I know you guys usuallyhave events, um, like you were
saying, there's a holiday kindof drive that you do every year,
right?
Shanita.

Speaker 4 (08:42):
Yes.
So we didn't do it in 2019, butthe two years previous to that,
we did have like a holidayChristmas b ased event.
And then we even, I think we gota t the last one, we got some
donations from like toys fortots know, things like that.
But of course with what's goingon this year, you know, we were
on the fence about whether ornot we wanted to do something.

(09:03):
And then we had a very generousoffer from one of our donors.
He linked us up with the companythat he's employed by and the
ir, u h, th eir team hascommitted to help us get some
new gifts for some of our kids.
So it's going to be a smallerevent tha n wh at we're normally
used to, but it's better than usnot having done anything this
year, as far as, you kn o w, events are concerned.

(09:24):
So we're really, really excitedto be able to do this for some
of our families.
So, yeah.

Speaker 3 (09:32):
Yeah.
And I think that's a reallygreat way that for my friends
that are kind of looking forways to get involved in ways to
help and give back partneringwith an organization like
Shanita is, you know, or shedoes organization itself.
I think the person she might betalking about is my husband

(09:52):
presumptuous.
But, um, yeah, I mean, he wasblown away too, just by, you
know, Todd and Shanita and thededication they have to this
organization.
And we had them over for dinnerand had this conversation about
how we could get more involved.
And then Steve, my husband gotin touch with internal people.
I believe HR who then use Nitaconnected with they think

(10:15):
offline without his involvement.
But the bottom line is, youknow, he works at a big company.
There are a lot of parents likeus, that kids are outgrowing
things quickly in these earlyyears.
And so the hope is it'll be veryeasy for, you know, people to
donate things and hopefully beable to do something for the
community, you know, around theholidays.

(10:36):
So if there's any other people,any listeners that are, I guess,
really anywhere in the countrythat think they could do
something similar to helpchildren's clothing giveaway by
organizing something, you know,it really just takes a few
emails and a few kind of setupphone calls to get the ball
rolling if I'm right.
E xactly.

Speaker 4 (10:52):
Oh yeah.
That's I mean, because, youknow, when we first started, it
was like, you know, we just hada few tables and we had maybe 20
people come by and that wasgreat.
We were like, yes.
You know, we helped 20 people,you know, so it's like everyone,
you know, you have to startsomewhere.
So, you know, we just kinda keptdoing it and it just kinda kept
growing and getting bigger andgetting bigger.
And on that same kind oftrajectory, we're hoping that in

(11:15):
the coming months or a year thatwe can actually have a facility
where it would almost mimic whata Goodwill would look like, but
of course, no one's going to bespending money.
They would just make anappointment with us to come in,
bring their family and kind ofjust chop for what they need for
their family.
And then that way we can kind ofdo it year round.

(11:36):
So one thing that we encouragepeople because we have a lot of
people at our church that wantto help a nd w e're like, u m,
collecting for our events andthey say, well, I don't have any
children.
I don't have anything like thatthat I can donate, or I don't
have any young children, Ishould say, we would say, okay,
well, if you want to make adonation towards, you know,
something we'll be doing in thefuture, you're more than welcome

(11:57):
to do that.
So they'll give us like$25 or$50.
And if we have any that where weneed to kind of, I call it
filling in the gaps where weknow that something is typically
really popular at our events,and maybe we didn't get a whole
lot of them to donate it.
I can then go out and purchasethose things and make sure that
they're there.

(12:17):
So we would say like underwearor socks or things like that.
And then that kind of helps makeup the difference.
So if there's anyone who is outthere that would want to make a
donation to us, and they can'tlike, say for example, like you
said, they live in another stateand it wouldn't be feasible for
them to send us, you know, allof their used items.
It wouldn't make any sense forthem to ship them to us here.

(12:39):
That would be another way thatthey could help us continue
growing and help us continuedoing this is by making a
monetary donation, which theycan also do on our website.

Speaker 3 (12:48):
That's a great point.
Yeah.
And do you have an email addressfor the organization, for people
to get in touch with you or anInstagram page or what's the
best way?

Speaker 4 (12:56):
So, I mean, any platform is fine, but they can,
there's a form on our websitethat they can fill out or they
can send us an email.
The email address is similarit's children's clothing
[e-mail].
Okay, great.
Great.

Speaker 3 (13:13):
And then just really quickly, I wanted to mention,
because I also thought this wasso amazing.
Your daughter Taya also sellsart

Speaker 4 (13:21):
Art show right.

Speaker 3 (13:23):
In conjunction with your organization.

Speaker 4 (13:26):
Yes.
So she's an artist, very town.
This is the same 18 year old.
I was talking about earlier,very talented artist.
Last year, we did kind of afundraiser art show with her and
she raised quite a bit of money.
It was her first art show ever.
And we had a really big turnout.

(13:46):
She sold a lot of originalpieces and it was very, it was
wonderful.
And we did something similarwith her just like a couple of
weeks ago, you know, because ofeverything that's going on.
Of course we can't do anin-person art show this year,
but she's kind of, well, notkind of she's, ticktock famous.

(14:06):
Uh, what is her number now?
She's like maybe 150,000 peopleor so follow her on Tik TOK.
Like she's working well, he'spretty cool.
Tase art on Tik TOK.
I'll just go ahead and plug hergreat.
She did kind of an online raffleand it was like make a donation
to children's clothing giveawayand you'll be entered into it,

(14:28):
you know, like a raffle for meto draw something, an original
piece for you.
So she just wrapped that up andhas the winner.
And she was just talking to methis morning about emailing the
woman to get the, like thespecifics of her piece.
So amazing.
So yeah, she definitely does alot to help and promote the
nonprofit.
So we're really appreciative.

(14:51):
It's amazing.

Speaker 3 (14:52):
The more is, are family goals over here,
teenagers involved, everybody atthis philanthropic stuff.
It's pretty remarkable.
So, and that's what it lookslike when you start the ball
rolling.
Right.
And from a young age.
So on that note, u m, so yeah,like I mentioned, we had dinner,
we were talking about givingback and their organization and

(15:16):
ways we get more involved.
And then Todd actually kind ofgot my wheels turning about
something that Z and I have beentalking about at the same time,
which is what brings us totoday's episode.
We're going to be discussingrace in different parts of the
country.
And as everybody knows, I thinkI'm new to this discussion.
I'm learning as I go and I'mtrying to absorb, you know,

(15:37):
things along the way.
And this particular topic isreally interesting to me because
you know, big cities on paperare diverse, different parts of
the country a re diverse.
You know, there's differentraces represented, but I'm
trying to understand, you know,from my own personal benefit
and, you know, interested inplaces that I can raise my

(15:58):
family, where is it trulyinclusive in this country?
You know, where people reallyrecognizing, appreciating,
elevating different races.
And it's not just all about, youknow, the majority.
So something that Toddmentioned, we were just talking
about, you know, where are youfrom?
Where'd you grow up, blah, blah,blah.
And he said he was, spent sometime in Oakland and also spent

(16:19):
some time in Los Angeles.
And so one of the things thatyou mentioned was kind of the
difference in, y ou k now, hisexperiences there, which is kind
of what leads me to what we'regoing to talk about now, unless
there's anything Z that you wantto add before we get going.
N o, I t hink i t's, I thinkthis is going to be a great
episode and I hope that you staytuned in.

(16:42):
Great.
So anyway, Todd, we will kind ofturn it over to you.
And is there anything that comesto mind to share with our
listeners?
Like I said, when you thinkabout your experiences growing
up in those two differentplaces,

Speaker 5 (16:57):
Um, well growing up in Oakland, uh, it was quite
different from, uh, Los Angeles,especially, you know, being in
school and, and stuff like that.
I can honestly say that Ilearned more of my history and
my heritage in elementary schooland junior high school.
And even in the first two yearsof high school, I learned more

(17:20):
about myself in the Bay area and Bay area schools than I ever
did in Los Angeles schools oreven the college I went to in
Los Angeles.
I don't know why that isperhaps, you know, a Bay area
maybe i s a little bit moreprogressive.
Maybe they have people in thoseareas that put together

(17:40):
curriculum.
I don't know why that is, but Ilearned a lot more black history
if you will, in Oakland t han Iever did in Los Angeles.
I remember it was times when,when I first moved to Los
Angeles, I was 16.
So I was going to be a junior inhigh school.
And then when it got aroundChristmas time, usually in

(18:02):
Oakland and in the school that Iwent to, we recognized Kwanzaa.
And when I mentioned that downhere in Los Angeles, people
looked at me like I was saying abad word.
So yeah.
They just, they didn't know whatit was.
And I'm like really young aboutquiet.
Okay.
Whatever.
And so it was just amazing thatthe things that I was exposed to

(18:27):
in Oakland at a young age andpeople in Los Angeles school
districts, maybe didn't, wasn'texposed to those things.
So it was quite different alongwith, you know, my parents and
family members, you know, makingsure that I knew my history and
you know, where we came from andthings like that.
And I guess the biggestdifference was I felt like in

(18:50):
the Bay area, I learned aboutblack history and it didn't
start as slavery, but down herein Los Angeles, you know, when
we start with our history, itstarted to sleep and it's like,
okay, well, where were youbefore that?
You know?
And, um, you know, I think it'sjust, it's sad and, you know,

(19:11):
prayerfully things can change,but you know, that's how I was
in my day.
I don't know how it is now, butthat's how I was in my day.
And I went to Berkeley highschool, which is right next door
to Oakland.
And they had a wholeAfrican-American history
department, like the wholebuilding dedicated to

(19:31):
African-American history.
And that's when I learned, youknow, African Haitian dance.
And, and we had, uh, we hadpeople come and present African
ceremonies and, you know, blackhistory was a big deal and
things like that.
And you know, down here it waslike, we're not going to do
nothing.
I mean, you know, in the highschool I went to down here in

(19:54):
Los Angeles was basically, Iwould say at the time it was
probably like 70% black.
And it's like, we, 70% black, no, ain't even talking about none
of this.
Okay.
So, and I loved the school Iwent to, we don't get me wrong.
Crenshaw high was wonderful.
Shout out to all the Crenshawpeople that went there.
But you know, now that I'molder, I see that we were what's

(20:19):
the word we were just, um, wewould just pass through, let's
put it like that.

Speaker 3 (20:25):
Did you notice a difference in the racial makeup
of the staff at the schools?
Did you feel like there was anassociation between having more
African-American teachers in oneschool versus another, or was it
pretty the same?

Speaker 5 (20:39):
It was the same, however, my history teacher in
Oakland was black and my historyteacher at Crenshaw high was
white.
And, you know, the history classI took was an African-American
history class in Oakland, butthen in Los Angeles, they didn't

(21:00):
offer African-American historyat all.
We touched it when it came tothe civil rights section of the
book, but, you know, aftertouching it, that was it.
And it baffles me that blackhistory is not considered
American history when blackfolks built the country that we

(21:24):
call America, it baffles me how,you know, it's just not
recognized at all.
So, you know, I mean, how canyou talk about America and not
talking about black people?
I see deal to the brain.

Speaker 2 (21:38):
That's why we're discussing all of this.

Speaker 3 (21:43):
And this is why I think when Z and I kind of just
organically picked topics todiscuss education was I think
the very first one that came upc ause we're like, there seems
to be a major g ap here,knowledge gap in how we got to
this place.
You know, I think when, youknow, George Floyd, COVID when
all o f these things k ind o fcame together, there were a lot

(22:05):
of white people like myselfgoing, like, how did this
happen?
You know, and I think a lot ofit goes back to how we were
brought up in school and how,the way we were taught education
history.
And of course it's painful andit's dark and heavy and ugly,
but it's our history, you know,and just a misrepresentation to

(22:25):
not acknowledge that part of itand give' em proper, you know,
attention to it.
So that's something, you know, Ithink Z and I share that, but
that's definitely a focus ofmine f or my own family.
And that was a big catalyst forwhy we wanted to start the
podcast was to do better for ourown children.
And it's still something I planon continuing to refocus on as

(22:47):
they grow up and as theirschools change and their
teachers change their friends, our goals, and all that, really
trying to do my part within theschool to make sure that, you
know, diversity and inclusionare main priorities for the
school.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
Yeah.
And actually, you know, tied,it's kind of funny because as
Jess and I were talking, as wewere preparing for this episode,
I was telling her how I wasspeaking to an uncle of mine.
I'm originally from New York andfrom Queens.
And I was speaking to an uncleof mine a couple of weeks ago,

(23:22):
who still lives, he lives inlong Island now, but he was
saying how you said, you know,Mako Mex used to come to the
mosque at the end of the block.
And I said, what?
I said, Oh yeah, they used to bea mosque there.
Like it wasn't the literal blockthat our family house was
located in.
But it was like, if you crossedlike a major street, like it was

(23:45):
on that subsequent corner.
And I knew that there were a lotof Muslims in the community,
like, you know, obviously theywould be dressed and you know,
their attire.
And, um, and I had a couple offriends that I went to school
with that were Muslim, but, butI really didn't like make the
association, like, I dunno, Ithink at some point the mosque
moved and when I was maybe ateenager or something, and so,

(24:08):
you know, I kind of, I guess,forgot about it.
And then he was like, yeah.
And you know, Muhammad Ali usedto come by and be there too.
And I said, what?
No.
He was like, yeah, they used togive out like$50 bills and$20
bills.
So the kids, and I said, are youkidding me?
Yeah.
He said, I shook his hand.

(24:30):
I said, s o, y ou k now, here Iam.
I'm like, y eah.
You know, I guess those storiesweren't told to me, and I don't
even know what sparked theconversation recently, but I was
just like baffled.
And I've told Jess before that,I feel like where I grew up in
Queens was a microcosm.

(24:52):
Like, I don't know most, I dunnoif the listeners know of the rap
artists, like kid in play andthought I'm Peppa, but they grew
up in my neighborhood.
Like literally, they were likethe next town over and you could
walk there and like maybe eightblocks and, and play at a store.
And like, I would go to thestore as a teenager, you know,

(25:12):
and like walk by kind of see ifthey were in there to wave.
And I went to high school inJamaica, Queens and, uh, you
know, big daddy Kane is fromthere and like LL cool J and so
a lot of rap stars, but also inthe neighborhood I grew up in,
which is Corona Queens.

(25:33):
Um, Nat King Cole was like threeblocks away.
His house, uh, Langston Hugheswas in the community.
As I said, Malcolm X.
He actually had a house that wasnot far from where we lived in
the next, which was EastElmhurst.
So Corona Nissan, so likeneighboring communities.
And so they lived there LangstonHughes.
As a matter of fact, I used togo to an afterschool program,

(25:55):
like a homework program.
It was run by anAfrican-American director and
assistant director.
And the library was calledLangston Hughes.
And just to, you know, just toshow how things change.
I went back there like manyyears later, maybe I dunno, in
my twenties and the populationhad changed in the neighborhood.

(26:17):
And so they used to be like,primarily African-Americans in
the homework assistance programand now was predominant Spanish,
Hispanic, Latino.
So, you know, I was like, butthose same directors were still
there.
Wow.
You know?
And so I kind of was like, wow.
You know, everything that Ilearned was I feel like it gave

(26:40):
me such pride, like the floriston the corner owned by a black
person, the dry cleaner is ownedby a black person, you know,
several black churches.
I attended the black church.
Like, you know, the influence ofAfrican-Americans was so strong
that, you know, I kind of grewup, I feel like in a microcosm,
a small bubble, because youknow, now when I think about my

(27:02):
kids, I'm like, where can I goand find that again?
It's like, it doesn't exist.
And I'm like Oakland, not quite,you know, like, and it's
definitely not where I grew upbecause that area is now
becoming because like the, likemy grandparents, like generation
has side off, then theirchildren moved out of the

(27:25):
community.
And so now it's predominantlylike Latino and Asian.
And so it's like, you know, andthey used to be like all homes,
you know, like very fewapartments, you know, people may
have rented, but they werevisiting, you know, like a floor
in a home or something likethat.
So now you don't even have that.

(27:45):
Like, you have all thesedifferent dwellings because, you
know, no one went to the cityand said, Hey, we don't want
these other dwellings, you know,this kind of thing.
So, but i t, you know, thiswhole like episode kind of
spread up the feelings that Ihave of, O h, I want my kids to
have the same courage that Ihad.
Like, you know, I never had afear o f walking into a room

(28:08):
with all white people because Iwas so proud of myself, you
know, I had that sense of self-worth and I think that's,
you know, one of the things thatI think is important in a
ddressing on our po dcast i sthat, you know, we need to think
about this as a systemic issuebecause everyone needs to have

(28:30):
se lf-worth, you know, you don'twant to live amongst people that
don't okay.
Because people that don't haveself-worth those who commit
crimes and do other things.
And it's really because theydon't believe in themselves, or
they never had someone toencourage them or support them
and the same opportunities orthe same opportunities, you

(28:52):
know, so on and so forth.
And so we need to recognize thatall of that begins in the
educational system.
Yes.
It starts at home first,everything starts at home.
So, you know, those factors, wecan't necessarily control as a
society.
You have whatever parents youhave, but once you get into the
educational system where a largeamount of time is spent by

(29:14):
children, I mean, eight hours aday, you know, then we need to
control those factors.
We need to have perhaps moreblack educators and not just in
primarily black schools, likethat's not really, you know,
that's great for black people,but that's not great in terms of
everyone being educated the sameway.

(29:34):
And so,

Speaker 3 (29:35):
And it's not cheap teaching our children
inclusivity, you know, I mean, Ispoke with someone today who
works at a school and myquestion was like, how do you,
you know, they're young, but howdo you make them inclusive at
such a young age at this school?
And she gave me a pretty goodanswer.
You know, it was, you know, wedraw from all different parts

(29:57):
and we're really affordable andwe give grants and all of this
stuff.
But I really think like some ofyour suggestions, you like
having a more diversified staffor having guest speakers come in
that are representative of alldifferent races and all
different professions, you know?
And it's a real thing.
When I think about it as amother, you're trying to teach

(30:20):
your children that the world istheir oyster and all these
opportunities are there forthem.
But then if you're white andthat's fine, but if you're not
white, your kid is lookingaround and going, well, why is
everybody I aspire to be whitealso?
You know, not like me.
And, um, I don't know how we fixthat, but that's like you said,

(30:42):
kind of what spurred thisepisode, thinking about all of
those things and how we canhopefully shift, make some
changes.
But I think it's important forwhite listeners like myself or
white people like myself to justhave that compassion and that
empathy for other parents, youknow, that are other races,
minority races, trying to teachtheir children by example, you

(31:05):
know, and, um, just kind ofopening their eyes to this
situation because it is asituation, all of a, you know, a
lot of the children's movies,the blonde hair, you know, light
colored skin, that sort of athing.
And I know that's a challengefor a lot of minority women that
are raising girls, you know, howdo you teach them based on the

(31:27):
mainstream movies that they'rebeautiful and, you know, the,
they don't look like Cinderella.
Exactly.
Their hair might be different,but it's still beautiful, you
know?
And it's, my heart goes out toyou raising daughters because my
kids, because of their whiteprivilege, I don't even have to
lose any sleep over that per se.
You know, for them specifically,I lose sleep over what that's

(31:48):
going to do to them in thelongterm.
You know, if I don't raiseawareness for it at a young age
and say, everyone's beautifuland make a point of educating
them because the media might betelling them something else, you
know, but we, I think as parentsowe it to our children to
highlight this or raiseawareness, you know, and, um, I
nosy, you're always a goodresource for books and things

(32:08):
like that for children.
So if anybody wants to email [e-mail], be
glad to send those resourcesover.
For sure.

Speaker 2 (32:19):
I was going to say, just to mention that for a
minute, as Jessie mentioned, Ihave a lot of, I have a lot of
children's books and I would sayprobably 85 to 90% of them have
a black face on them.
Some kind of way, I'm a personof color or something that I've

(32:39):
made a point to do that from thetime that they were young.
But the other day I saw my childusing her tablet and she was
doing something that waseducational, which is great, but
it was about history.
And so it had six characters up,I think one was like Lincoln.
And I d unno, there was only oneblack person and that person was

(33:01):
over Neale Hurston.
And I was like I said to myself,Oh, Zora Neale Hurston, like,
cool.
Right.
So my daughter was at the pointof clicking.
Like she had already listened toone.
So now she was selecting thenext person and she skipped over
this, or I know her son and Isaid, wait a minute, why are you

(33:21):
skipping this?
And, um, I was like I said, youneed to learn about Zora Neale
Hurston.
And I know she, we have someother book of black women that,
you know, have contributedgreatly to America and Darnell
Huston's also in that book.
And so it was just, but I wasjust like baffled.
I was like, all this work thatI'm doing and you don't big Zora

(33:45):
Neale Hurston.
And I said to myself, you know,this is what I mean, it's like
there has to be reinforcementfrom so many different areas and
different people.
Like it wouldn't have beenenough probably for me, even as
a young child to have had myfamily keep telling me that I
was beautiful or this and thatit's, uh, you know, going to the

(34:08):
homework assistance programwhere they talked about Kwanzaa
and they talked about, you know,they had poets and they had
black art and they had blackdancers.
And, you know, like if I didn'thave that cultural experience
tied to it and seeing it formyself, then I probably wouldn't
have felt the same way.
You know, I wouldn't have grownup to think the same way that I

(34:29):
think today.
And I say, you know, for mydaughters, I can, you know,
shout from the rooftop abouteverybody, you know, that has
contributed every blackinventor.
And, but it won't make adifference if it's not
reinforced somewhere.
And so, you know, I feel like,you know, we all pay tax dollars

(34:50):
into the educational system.
And the issue that I have isthat it's still not equal based
on full paying taxes into thesystem.
And you know, so we're supposedto be all benefiting from the
education, the free educationalsystem.
And it shouldn't matter what theproximity of your house or your

(35:12):
apartment or where you live.
Cause that's not written in therules.
That's not in the by-lines.
Uh, so really we need to holdour senators and our Congress
people, you know, we need tohold them accountable for
changing this.
And, you know, we don't knowwhat the voter turnout is going
to be, but I hope that you know,that the response will be that

(35:35):
we've all learned something fromthe last four years.
I hope that we've all learnedthat it's our civic
responsibility to get involved.
It doesn't matter.
Like, you know what you do as aprofession.
It doesn't matter where you comefrom, but if you're a citizen or

(35:58):
trying to become a citizen, likeyou need to get involved and you
need to make sure that we holdthese people accountable.
Like they're getting paid fromour tax dollars and we're not
getting the output that weshould be getting.
I mean, we have police shootingsthat don't happen in other
countries.
That's a problem.
Why do we have kids shooting inschools?

(36:20):
And why is that happening inAmerica?
Yeah.
So, you know, there are so manyreasons why this is not just a,
an African-American black livesmatter issue.
This is an American issue.
And if America doesn't do abetter job of educating and

(36:41):
supporting single parents andnourishing our kids with food
and, you know, cleanenvironment, if we don't do a
better job yeah.
If we don't do a better job inall these areas, then the future
is going to be bleak foreveryone.
You know, there, there are nodollar signs that can put you in

(37:01):
a bubble.
I don't care if you do fly toMars, you know, you're going to
have problems on Mars becauseyou have people at any time, you
have people you're gonna havesome types of social issues.

Speaker 5 (37:13):
And I love what you said Z about, you know, us being
taxpayers, you know, when thepolice harass cue abuse and when
schools, miseducate, and ms.
Guy we're paying for that.
Yes.
Not only in the figurativesense, but literally I'm paying

(37:36):
you to harass me.
I pay your salary and you harassme.
I'm giving my money for you toharass me.
And that's what makes it sopainful.
It's like, I'm paying for thepolice, I'm paying for the
schools and you're going tomiseducate me and abuse me.
And I'm literally funding you.
And it's like, you know, if Iwasn't paying for it, maybe it

(38:00):
wouldn't hurt as bad, but it'slike, I'm literally paying out
of my pockets for you to arrestme.
Right.
You know, and you know, it'sjust, like you said, we all got
to get involved.
And we all got to, you know,make sure that we hold people
accountable that need to be ableto count.
And one thing that I wanted tojust m ention is also along
those same lines and not to like, you know, bring in

(38:22):
negativity, but just not allow,u m, people who oppose this
progression and this growth todeter you.
B ecause if I turn on thetelevision

Speaker 4 (38:36):
One more day and see another story about someone
trying to sabotage the electionby, I mean, going to, I don't
know if you saw this headline ZBaldwin park, which is a black
neighborhood here in LosAngeles, was it last night or
the night before someone litfire to one of the ballot boxes

(39:00):
and burned up a good majority ofthe ballots that were inside of
them?
Yes.
Probably with the, yes.
With the assumption that theballots an d t h ere w ere going
to be voting a certain way.
Um, y eah.
So that, you know, you wouldpinpoint and go to a black
neighborhood if you were inopposition to t h at h orrifying
y' all.
Ye ah.
And then a couple of days ago, Ican't remember what state it was

(39:20):
in maybe Virginia or something.
I don't want to say the state,but it was their final day I
think, to register to vote.
And they were trying to do itelectronically and someone
somewhere cut some cable thatcrashed the system to delay pe
ople.
It's like, ag ain, I think itwas Virginia.
It's like, okay, if we're goingto be fair about it, let's be

(39:44):
fair about it.
Like why all of the, you know,un derhand,

Speaker 6 (39:48):
Cheating, cheating,

Speaker 4 (39:51):
Just being purely, just evil, just keeping people
from doing something that'severyone's right.
To do, you know, it's just, it'sappalling.
And it's like, I, for 1:00 AMready for this election to be
done and over with and behind usand hopefully on the right side
of where it should be so that wecan put to bed.

(40:13):
A lot of these people who aredoing things like this, I mean,
they just need to go backwherever they came from and just
stay there in my opinion,because it's just, it's
horrible.
I mean, and we watch BBC newssometimes, and it's like other
countries are laughing at usright now.

(40:33):
I mean, and we, you know, Idon't want to go off on like too
far on his hand t here, but wewent to Ethiopia last year for a
couple of weeks and just lookingat the news and things like
that, just the whole spin ofjust being an American is so
different when you're on theoutside, looking in, like when

(40:56):
we're in the midst of this, it'slike, O h, you know, like, but
it's like, there's so many otherthings going on in the world.
And you know, I know that we'reconcerned about, you know, our
lives as Americans, but it'slike for people just to be so s
mall m inded and think that Ijust, you know, this is what I

(41:16):
think, and this is what has tobe i s just wrong and not
including other people on otherraces and other ethnicities and
the things that they go through.
And it's just, you know, it'ssad just to witness that, you
know, I m ean,

Speaker 6 (41:29):
Yeah, yeah.
Other countries definitely arelaughing at it.
You know, they

Speaker 5 (41:34):
See the hypocrisy that I think we don't address.
We call ourselves United, youknow, and they're like, okay, I
thought you guys were UnitedStates, you got to red and blue
States fighting each other.
Right.
And you know, you have onesection of the country that

(41:55):
wants to q ueue, you know, othersections of the country.
And it's like, they laugh at ourname United States of America,
you know, walk around p ompous,like, H ey, w e're the number
one country.
Right.
You know, our president is theleader of the free world and all
this stuff.
And it's like, it's a llmisleading.
What are we doing?

(42:15):
You know, like what, what wasthat?
And it comes down to, and Ithink you guys mi ght've m
entioned this on your podcast,it comes down to our foundation
and what we were built on an a ccount, yo u k n ow?
Exactly.

Speaker 3 (42:28):
Just, yeah.
Yeah.
I was going to say like othercountries, we're not the only
ones that mess up, but theircountries have handled their
mess ups, you know, better overtime.
And I'm thinking of the example.
See, I think you came acrossabout Germany teaching Holocaust
in his secondary curriculum.

(42:50):
Right.
So they're not brushing it off.
Yeah.
They're confronting

Speaker 5 (42:56):
Right.
Or not pretending as if itdidn't happen.

Speaker 3 (43:01):
And

Speaker 5 (43:01):
I think that's one of the problems with America and
why we haven't gotten as far aswe could, because we've never
dealt with our sin problem ofslavery and mistreatment of
humans.
And, and, you know, until, youknow, we lament those scenes.

(43:21):
And what I mean by l ament isuntil we are able to feel the
pain of those who were oppressedand acknowledge it, w e'll never
get that far because you have toaddress it in order to heal from
it.
And so what I'm saying isAmerica's never really healed

(43:44):
from the, o f slavery.
That wound is still fresh, youknow, and, you know, I was
sharing t he timeline w ith s hen eeded, you know, we were 401
years w e've been misreadingand, you know, it's only been,
what was it like 60 years or 50years or something like that,

(44:06):
that we were able to do thethings that we enjoy today, like
vote or, you know,

Speaker 3 (44:18):
Or you put it like that.
It's really,

Speaker 5 (44:21):
I want to be grateful for that.
Right.
Right.
We've been enslaved andmistreated and segregated longer
than we've been free, you know,and, you know, have we made

Speaker 4 (44:32):
Progress?
Yeah.
We can use the same bathroom.
We can sit at the same waterfountain, you know, can we live
in the same neighborhood?
Can we, you know, can we buyproperty like

Speaker 3 (44:45):
That to schools be funded the same,

Speaker 4 (44:49):
You know, that's the progress that we got to get to,
but we'll never get there untilwe, you know, have these
conversations like this.
That's what, yeah.
And that's what he says.
Sometimes when we're talking,having conversations like this,
he's like, I hate to hear peoplesay, Oh, well, get over it.
Don't play the race card, getover, get he's like, we haven't
even addressed it.
Well, how can we get oversomething we haven't even

(45:09):
addressed yet?
You know?
Like, can we at least talk aboutit first?
And it's like, it's, it'sbaffling because you know, just
when you're saying 50 years, youknow, our parents can tell a
story.
Now, grandmother, grandmother,my mom can be a story about when
she was a little girl, how shecouldn't drink at the same water

(45:34):
fed as a white person, you know?
And it's like,

Speaker 2 (45:37):
No that's age generation.

Speaker 3 (45:43):
Yeah.
For those people that aresaying, get over it.
It's like, have you ever oncehad a discussion with another
person that's not white aboutrace and really tried to
understand that point of viewventure to guess the answer is
probably no, because it'suncomfortable.
You know?
And that's, I think why we'retrying to do this podcast is to

(46:04):
encourage people to step out oftheir comfort zone so that we
can normalize this conversationso that we can all learn and
grow from it and hopefully moveon and progress because we're
not going to be able to do anyof those things until people are
faced with the reality of thefeelings, you know, and

(46:25):
understanding the other side ofthis.
And I think anybody thatquestions, whether or not this
is relevant today, it's like yousaid, Todd, when you put it in a
timeline and you think aboutjust, you know, one generation
ago, the daily basic things thatwere not afforded to people of
color, it's really m indblowing

Speaker 2 (46:46):
And said, yeah, yeah, definitely.
And that's why I think, youknow, the word tired is very
suited.
I said, you know, I was watchingDon lemon on CNN one day and he
said, w ait, just tired.
And I said, wow, Don lemon saidthat, like I was first shocked

(47:11):
that he would say that.
And then I was like, yes, thatis it tired?

Speaker 4 (47:17):
You know, it's funny.
I put up a meme the other daythat I saw online, it spoke so
true to me and to a lot ofpeople that saw it and it
basically say a nap, won't helpif it's your soul that's and
it's so true.
It's like, when does it all likeget better?
You know, it's like, I mean,just what, what was like a week

(47:39):
or two ago, there was anotherpolice shooting of another
innocent black man in Texas.
It's like, when are we going toget off of this whole, like, you
know, police brutality, just dowhatever they want to do.
Thing.
I mean, like a nightmare, it's anightmare recurring nightmare,

(48:00):
right?
Y eah.
Waking up to the same thing overand over again.

Speaker 3 (48:11):
And then something that we just totally take for
granted, or at least I did, youknow, in my previous life being
able to just not worry aboutstuff like that.
Cause I'm white, you know, andnot having to worry about that
for my family.
But like we talked about, Ithink in one of the most recent
episodes, if you're a person ofcolor, this follows you
throughout your life, this fearof things like this happening,

(48:34):
it doesn't matter what level ofsuccess you've achieved in your
life or how many accolades youhave under your belt.
I t just because of your skincolor, you have this fear
following you kind of ingrainedin you from a young, young age
to fear law enforcement to haveto worry about not being given
the same opportunities and y ouk now, having your rights

(48:56):
disregarded and all o f thesebasic

Speaker 4 (49:01):
Or just people not liking you, just because of the
color of your skin.
I mean that those people stillexist.
I was telling you last month,you know, we were in Brentwood,
running in Herrin, mind your ownbusiness, get out of the car and
a white man walks back to it orwalks by us and says go back to
Compton.

Speaker 3 (49:22):
Yeah.
I mean,

Speaker 4 (49:24):
It's like,[inaudible] , it's mind blowing, it's mind
blowing content, but yourassumption to think we should go
back there because blacks werenot allowed to come to
Brentwood.
So run an errand.
Right.

Speaker 3 (49:46):
I'm glad that you can laugh about it.
Cause I'm humiliated on behalfof that person and the, you
know, the race that he wasrepresenting that day.
Like, I mean, I just can't, Ican't imagine,

Speaker 4 (49:59):
I can tell you, I can laugh about it only because I
know that all white people arenot like that.
There's a select few that chooseto just be that way and behave
that way.
And I think as a black person,you know, Z and Todd could
probably attest to that as well.
It's not like you get used to itand normalize it.

(50:19):
It's just, it's not surprisingas much as I would think it
would be.
Right.
You know, because it's almostexpected though.

Speaker 2 (50:32):
Unfortunately, unfortunately like if you're in
a store you expect to befollowed or eyeballs or like you
come to like that.
Yeah.
When I mentioned that on aprevious episode, you kind of
you, before you get into thestore or before you get into the
elevator, right.
For a lot of times they'realready thinking, let me move to

(50:55):
the back corner, let me movehere or there, because you know,
so then someone doesn't assumethat I did something, if
something does go wrong andthat's another big thing is the
assumption you're criminalizingus constantly.
So, you know, you know, it's,Oh, you know, I've, I've seen
cops do this and I just have tosay this, I've seen cops say,

(51:18):
well, they were actingsuspicious.
I'm like, well, how would youfeel if you constantly are
worrying that cops are likelooking at you?
Like you're a criminal whenyou're not, I said, maybe you
would start to just feel likeyou're an ed, because you are
afraid that they may actually dosomething to you, like kill you.

(51:38):
Like maybe that's actually awarranted concern based on
everything that's happened.
Circle evidence.
Like maybe that's why they're anedge because they're afraid for
their life.
Why are you running from thepolice?
Well, I don't really want torun, but something in my mind
just tells me instinctually, letme get the hell away from this

(52:01):
person who might, you know, Imean, you know, the isn't let me
just meal and get on the groundbecause Oh, I have something in
my pocket.
And if I go to reach for thesomething in my pocket, and I
even say that I have somethingin my pocket, I'm going to reach
for it.
I might get killed.
I don't know.

(52:21):
Why would I think this way?
Why would I possibly think allthese things when the cop is
trying to stop me?
I know we don't.
And so for people that aresaying like, again about the
cops, you know, going down thatworm hole, how are black people
supposed to feel when you comeinto our communities?

(52:41):
And it's not to say, how can wemake your community better?
What kinds of things do you needin your community?
Or even, I mean, let's even saysomething like if it's, if there
are drugs being issued from acertain point, everyone in the
community is not trying to dothat.
So perhaps you can have aconversation with some people
who want the drugs out of theircommunity, you know, like have

(53:04):
these conversations with people.
It's like the only time we canhave a conversation is when
someone's killed.
So someone has to be killed.
There has to be a homicide inorder for these conversations to
take place like that doesn'teven make any sense.
That's a waste of taxpayerdollars for it to get to that

(53:25):
point.
Because

Speaker 3 (53:26):
Then what happens when you have a homicide, you
have all these homicidedetectives, then you have the
coroner, then you have the, Imean, that's a waste of
resources when you could havejust had conversations in the
beginning.
Exactly.
And I was going to say to thatend, I don't know, Todd, if you,
one of the things we talkedabout in a previous episode was

(53:46):
the need for law enforcement toget more involved in the
communities that they serve.
And hopefully the idea being,you know, once there's a better
rapport established that we canminimize the things that happen
out of fear or emotions takingover.
And, you know, we can actually,u h, not have such a tense

(54:07):
relationship between the peoplethat a re supposed to be i n
protecting us.
So I think the, actually you were g oing t o kind of ask some
of those questions, but I'm justgoing to do that if that's okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
I was just g oing t o say likegrowing up in Oakland versus LA,
did you feel there was more of asense of community among law
enforcement or did you feel, didyou notice a difference between

(54:27):
the two places that you lived interms of feeling more supported
or not supported or fa ll?
Li ke,

Speaker 5 (54:34):
That's a good question.
When I was, when I lived inOakland, I played football and
two of my coaches were policeofficers.
So I learned at a young age thatnot all cops are bad, you know,
w hen I had a relationship withthem.
And so I didn't look at thepolice as the enemy, but when I

(54:56):
had my first encounter with thepolice outside of those two
relationships, it made me thinkabout, you know, what they see
when they see me long storyshort, me and my brother we re r
iding our bikes in our ownneighborhood.
And the police came up on us andtold us to put our bikes down

(55:20):
and they just questioned us.
And they asked us, did we livehere?
And while we ri ding o ur bikesand I'm like, u m, i t's n ight,
Saturday, I'm riding my bike.
Why are you out of breath?
Uh, I've been riding my bike.
Um, you know, and so they, youknow, they just questioned this.
And where do you guys live?
What are you doing over here?
We live right there.
And, you know, we kind of had tolike prove our sales, where we

(55:44):
lived and stuff like that.
So when that happened, I was 12,13, I think, 12 or 13.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And so, you know, they didn'tbeat us up or nothing, but they
questioned us and I felt like Idid something wrong when I was
just riding my bike.

(56:05):
Right.
And so then, you know, theRodney King thing happened in 92
and that was right before myfamily moved back down to Los
Angeles.
And so when I got to LosAngeles, I noticed that there
was a lot of tension between lawenforcement and the community.
And, you know, one thing thatalways made me scratch my head

(56:28):
was that the police say thatthey are here to protect and to
serve.
And I didn't see a lot of surgesfrom the police down here in Los
Angeles, you know, in Oakland,like I said, you know, we, I had
two football coaches that wereserving t he community by
coaching kids and stuff likethat.
But i n Los Angeles, I reallydidn't see that much, you know?

(56:53):
And, u m, you know, it, I neversaw like programs where police
would, you know, try to setthings up, to connect with the
community and stuff like that.
I mean, I know it does exist,but I just personally haven't
seen it, you know, my littlesection of Los Angeles, but down
here, when I moved down here, Iwas always told you c an n ot

(57:14):
trust the police.
Try to be squeaky clean whenthey ask you anything or when
they pull you over, when t heypull you over.
Right.
Right.
And so, you know, I got pulledover once in Oakland, on my
bike, but then in Los Angeles, Igot pulled over.
I would t hink about four orfive times questioned, you know

(57:36):
what y ou're doing?
I have to prove myself.
I g ot t o show h im I'm notdoing nothing.
Then I can go on my way as if Ihave to prove I am who I am and
stuff like that, but I never gotassaulted or anything like that,
but I'm n ot g oing t o l ose it.

Speaker 3 (57:53):
The fact that that is a fear of yours or a thought of
yours, that's the problem.
You know, the fact that youpreface it with, I haven't been
assaulted before, but it's like,no one should have that.
Even as t he possibility from alaw enforcement, you know,
especially somebody who founds acharity, you know, a n onprofit
organization and spends theirfree time, literally people in

(58:15):
need.
R ight.

Speaker 5 (58:17):
And I remember when, uh, the George story thing was
happening and all the protestswere happening.
My daughter was concerned when Iwould take our dog out for a
walk.
And I was like, why is you?
Like, I don't want the police tothink you stole the dog and you
know, do something horrible andI'll lie.
You know, I understand.
And you know, that's justsomething that we have to deal

(58:38):
with being black in thiscountry.
So, but on the bright side, Ialways tell people, not all
police are bad and that's oneprofession where everybody has
to be good.
You can't have bad apples in thepolice department.
You know, you just can't.
And if you have one, they haveto go, yo u k n ow, no t b e

(59:00):
moved to another precinct.
Exactly, exactly.
And so it was baffling is that alot of these cops that are on
the news for doing what they'vedone, they all got history
behind.
They had a record, al l o f t hat r ed flags.
And it's like, why di d I s tillha d a job?
They sh ould h a ve b een firedfrom the first of fense, but th
ere's a d e al h ere.
And it's like, you know, youknow, like Chris Ro xy,

Speaker 4 (59:22):
You can't have bad apples as pilots.
You know what I'm saying?
You just can't say, Oh, he's agood pilot.
But every once in a while theplane, the police can't be bad.
And so, you know, that's one profession where you can't have a
bad day.
That's just what you signed upfor.
You can't have a bad day and youcan't abuse your power.

(59:44):
And when you do that, you haveto go, you have to, you have to
be able to c ount t hem

Speaker 2 (59:50):
Of weapons too.
Cause they carrying weapons tomean firefighters, go into
homes, firefighters, service,you know, an entire community.
You don't really hear aboutfirefighters, assaulting people,
but you know, there must be someassociation with, I have a
weapon, I have power and I havecontrol.

(01:00:10):
So, you know, perhaps theirpsychological exam needs to
change about, you know, how youfeel once you get a weapon.
Cause maybe you answer certainquestions, a certain kind of
way, then you need to not workon the forest simply because you
associate a weapon with power.
I mean, who knows?
I mean, there's so many remediesthat we could probably things

(01:00:31):
that we could probably do, butfirst it's like, we have to
convince people that somethingneeds to be done, you know,
acknowledgement.
Yeah.
We're trying to convince.
And then in the midst of thatconvincing, we have people who
are trying to abductor agovernor, you know, so, um, duct

(01:00:52):
and like kill a governor.
So, you know, yeah.
I just want to point out too,like Todd was saying, it was
struck me.
He, you know, he has his ownfear and whatever psychological
effects that's had on him.
And then his teenage daughter isalso now receiving that it's
being passed down to her becauseshe's worried for her dad.

(01:01:15):
And that's something that we canimagine is why people, I don't
think

Speaker 4 (01:01:20):
That stems from not being in a neighborhood where it
is primarily African-American,it stems from being in a
neighborhood where there arevery few African-Americans.
So, you know, our daughters getasked all the time, Oh, you live
in this area.
We thought maybe you werebrought in for school everyday,

(01:01:41):
you know?
Yeah.
So it's like, you're damned ifyou do, you're damned if you
don't, it's like, you know, itnever, it's just the city.
Like we were talking aboutearlier with having children,
little toddlers versus havingteenagers.
It's like there's pros and cons.
Like you want them to be in agood area that you think is a

(01:02:01):
good area.
And then they have a wholenother set of problems, you
know, whole nother set ofproblems being stopped and asked
if they live like, you know, oursame daughter walking, the dog
police pull up, you know, Hey,uh, Oh yeah, yeah.
She, mommy.
He said that I wasn't in thecrosswalk, but I was like, Oh

(01:02:24):
yeah, yeah.
So it's like the same situationthat you're trying to get away
from per se.
You can't get away from itbecause guess what?
You're still going to be black.
You're still going to have Brownskin, you know, unless you live
like in the middle of nowherearound n o other people, you
know, you're going to besubjected to situations like

(01:02:46):
that regardless.
Or until something changes, likeseeing the same something, y ou
k now, until something changes,it's going to be the same,
basically.

Speaker 3 (01:02:56):
Yeah.
Well I guess the way I'm feelingis this just reinforces this
idea of how this problem is sosystemic.
And so a part of our culture andit's going to take everybody's
effort to shift things and itreally starts with
conversations.
And hopefully thoseconversations empower people to

(01:03:19):
take action and make changewithin their own lives and start
small within their own families.
And then hopefully it grows fromthere, you know, and voting,
changing policies andlegislation.
Those are all very, veryimportant.
Um, Z I know you read somethings, we talking about how it
can be daunting at times to feellike you don't know enough on

(01:03:42):
now you personally, but forpeople who maybe don't feel like
they should vote because theydon't know enough about the
policies, but it is people'slives on the line.
And people's childhoods,people's families, their
emotional wellbeing for everydaylife.
Everyday basic life.
Everybody deserves to have ahappy, healthy upbringing, you

(01:04:02):
know, in a safe environmentwhere they're not worried about
their parents getting pulledover for walking their dog,
their family dog, you know?
So that's kind of where I'm at.
I don't know if you want toshare any thoughts.

Speaker 2 (01:04:15):
There is no perfect universe.
And I don't think thatAfrican-Americans are naive,
that these changes are not goingto happen overnight, but the
change is going to requirepersistence.
So if you're gonna, you know, doit halfway, then you might as

(01:04:35):
well not do it.
You need to make a decision thatif you're going to be
anti-racist, then that's goingto require allyship.
And that's going to require youto come out of your comfort
zone.
And it's going to require you totake action and let your
Congress people know rights toyour senators and let them know

(01:04:57):
that this is unacceptable.
That it's not okay.
That every day in America, aninnocent person of color is
killed.
Like you can't frame it next toOh well there's crime and they
kill each other.
You cannot frame it next tothat, because that is not the
same thing.
And perhaps that wouldn't evenhappening.

(01:05:17):
If you hadn't, you know, causethe redistricting of lines and
created this systemic problemwith poverty and such, we
wouldn't even be there forpoverty.
Yeah.
So please, I implore ourlisteners to take action.
You know, just do anythingthat's positive in the way of

(01:05:43):
helping someone other thanyourself, you know, because if
you help someone other thanyourself, then that's going to
trickle down and what we neednow, black lives matter, George
Floyd's murder.
Unfortunately, you know, thereis a trickle down effect and I
think people are more conscious.
People are more woke and peopleare more inspired to take

(01:06:04):
initiative, take that samepassion and don't let that flame
burnout.
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:06:11):
Don't let it fizzle out.
Yeah.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:06:15):
Because that's the flame that every person of color
in this country is constantlyblowing on to keep lit like
every day in our lives.
That's what our lives are like.

Speaker 4 (01:06:29):
Yeah.
And just going back to, when Iwas talking about my daughter
earlier, you know, she likes tohang, you know, hanging around
with their friends a lot.
Um, this is all of course preCOVID and the majority of her
friends are Caucasian, whitegirls.
And we still have to have thetalk with her.
You know, that talk, even thoughyou're with your Caucasian

(01:06:50):
friends, you know, there's somethings that you can't do.
Some things that they can do perse, you know, they can be
obnoxious and do things, but youcan't do that because if you get
too much attention or someonethinks that you're the
ringleader, then that negativeenergy is going to come down on

(01:07:11):
you before it's going to comedown on them.
And so we just have to keepreminding both of our girls that
I was meeting.
Well, my daughter was with acouple of her friends one night
and I was meeting up with them,walking the dog to kind of pick
my daughter up.
If you will.
They were at a football game atthe school.
And a couple of her girlfriendswere being really obnoxious to

(01:07:32):
an older woman who was doingsomething that she shouldn't
have been doing anyways.
And as I was walking up, I'mlooking at my daughter and I'm
like, you know, you're not goingto do what they're doing because
a whole different light is goingto be shine on you.
So you need to say goodnight toyour friends and let's go home.
You know, exactly.

(01:07:53):
You can't get away with whatthese girls would do to this
older white woman or say tothis, not do, but say to this
older white woman, you can't dothat because I feel, I know that
it would be blown out ofproportion and her energy will
then be directed towards you.
So if you're with your friendsand they decide they're to do

(01:08:15):
something like that, you got tostep away from them.
And just having, you know, thosetypes of conversations in 2020
with our daughter, who's now 18and who can go to jail, even if
she didn't do something wrong,you know, is a scary thought.
So, you know, she wants to drivenow and she wants to go get her

(01:08:38):
driver's license.
And that kind of opens up awhole new can of worms.
So, you know, every time shewants to take a step towards
being an adult and doing thingson our own, we have to, yeah, we
get nervous and we have to say,Hey, you know, remember you're a
black girl, you know?
A nd it's like, yes,

Speaker 3 (01:08:59):
Anybody is questioning.
Whether there are racist thingshappening, racist, sentiments
felt in this country.
Here we are, you know, with thislovely family started this great
organization, which is how wegot in touch.
And she's here in 2020 talkingabout her daughter that she has
to coach on how to not beyourself all the time.

Speaker 4 (01:09:23):
Exactly.

Speaker 3 (01:09:25):
To not feel free, to be herself all the time.
So yeah.
Life lessons.
Yeah.
I think that's really important.
Thank you for sharing all ofthat.
I think it's, um, hopefullyreally eye-opening for a lot of
people, like I said, who feellike we're past this, right.
You know, we're not, we're in abig city, big liberal city, and

(01:09:48):
we still are, um, dealing withthis stuff here.
So please vote and please openyour minds and your eyes and
your ears, and really listen,you know, to the, the people
around you and the people whoare willing to share stories
like this and hopefully take itto heart and let that be

(01:10:10):
something that inspires you tomake changes.
And I think one of those issupporting African-American
owned businesses.
And just to tie it back tochildren's clothing giveaway, I
don't know if there are anyitems that you guys particularly
are in need of if you know, anyfamilies that have specific
needs right now, if there'sanything our listeners can
prioritize or like age ranges orgear anything diapers

Speaker 4 (01:10:34):
Well, for us right now, we're just, we're focused
on this holiday event.
So with the exception of maybecollecting, I like, I think
someone was saying like blanketsand things like that with the
exception of maybe collectingthings like that, we're kind of
putting on hold, acceptingtangible donations until after
the new year, this, because wewant to focus on the holiday

(01:10:55):
event, but we do actually have aconnection with other people in
the community that service likethe homeless people that live
out on the streets.
And if we were to get thingslike blankets and coats and
things like that, we coulddefinitely pass it on to them
because we know that they'reactually going out the street
and taking these items topeople.

(01:11:16):
So again, just what I was sayingearlier, if there's something
that sparks a desire to donateto children's colon giveaway at
this current moment, it would bea monetary donation that would
definitely help us.
Once we get into the new year tokind of expand and be able to
help people more.
After the new year, we would beback on track with accepting,

(01:11:38):
you know, gently used items,anything that pertains to
children, clothing, books,shoes, some small furniture,
items, toys, stuffed animals,bottles, anything that pertains
to raising a child because weget requests or pregnancy.
We get requests all the time fora wide range of items.

(01:12:02):
And like I was saying earliertoo, you know, we are so blessed
in that.
We never have a, well, not,never more often than not.
We have what we're being askedfor, which is such a huge
blessing.
And if we don't have it, we takethose monetary donations and
we're able to go out and buy itfor the family.

(01:12:24):
Um, we had a young woman acouple of years ago who she had
just gotten out of jail.
We of course didn't ask her whather situation was with that, but
she had just gotten out of jail.
And she said that, u h, thecourts would not let her have
visitation with her six m onthold, unless she had a crib for

(01:12:46):
the baby to sleep in.
When the baby came to her house,we were able to give her a crib
mattress, all of the, you know,sheets, bedding everything
because a donor gave it to usand we were able to pass it o
nto her.
And then she was able to see herchild.
So, I mean, just, I mean,that's,

Speaker 5 (01:13:05):
There's a lot of stories like that, but one of my
favorite ones is a young ladywas she was in need of, she
needed a car seat in a, i n a Korea or something like that.
I don't know.
Oh yeah.
She reached out to us.
We had it.
And we set up an opportunity forher to come and get it.

(01:13:27):
And she told us that if shehadn't got these things, she was
contemplating having an abortionand she would have terminated a
pregnancy if nobody helped her.
A nd she reached out to us, Idon't know how she h ad learned
about it.
A nd we gave it to her and shewas like, thank you because I
was this close to a board.

(01:13:48):
And that brought a tear to myeye.
And I'm like, man, we saved thelife.
It's crazy how, you know, peoplewere in need.
They really n eed things.
A nd for us to be able to be ina position where we can ill,
it's humbling.

Speaker 4 (01:14:02):
And a lot of times they're not able to jump through
the hoops that they would haveto jump through with some of the
other organizations where theyhave to wait for months, or
maybe these organizations onlyhelp once a year or once they
help you once they don't helpyou again, you know, it's just a
wide range of, you know, kind ofred tape that some families have

(01:14:23):
to go, you know, have to gothrough.
So to be able to fill requestsor have the things that people
need on the spot, it'sdefinitely a blessing.
And it's, you know, itencourages us when we get tired
and we're like, you know, we runinto roadblocks with things when

(01:14:44):
we know that we've helped achild or their parent, or, you
know, a family, it just really,it blesses our life.
It makes us very happy that we,you know, we can help, even if
it's just in a small way.
So,

Speaker 2 (01:14:59):
Well, for those who are listening again, that is www
that clothing giveaway that org.
And now you've actually heardfrom those who founded the
company and the organization.
So please don't be shy.
You've heard this stories andyou know, a lot of people

(01:15:20):
questioned sometimes nonprofitsorganizations.
Is it really going to get to theperson?
Some people want to make surethat it actually gets to the
person that's not, you know,somehow other manipulated or
like you said, donated for cashor what have you.

Speaker 4 (01:15:36):
That's one thing that I definitely try to do on our
social media is, you know, ofcourse I have clearance from the
parents t hat I asked them, youknow, when we give you these
things, we would love for you toshare photos so that we can show
our donors, the things that they've donated, we can show them
where it's going.
You know?
And for the most part, a lot ofthem are really open to that.

(01:15:56):
They love that.
T hey're because they're soexcited that they have something
that they really needed and theydidn't have to pay for it.
And they didn't have to jumpthrough hoops to get it.
So, and then, you know,sometimes even they'll say,
well, I'll send a picture, butyou know, maybe don't share it
publicly.
And I'll say, okay.
And sometimes I'll share it withthe donor.
I'll say, Hey, remember t hat?

Speaker 3 (01:16:14):
That's that for me, once I said, Hey, remember that
I almost cried the day youpicked up my kids cribs.
I was like, I hope they find agood home picture is adorable.

Speaker 4 (01:16:27):
Oh my gosh, the mom was so, so happy.
She was so happy.

Speaker 3 (01:16:31):
That was awesome that you did that though.
That like made my dayimmediately.
It was like sending it to myhusband.
Like you got to see this look,[inaudible]

Speaker 4 (01:16:43):
Having this kind of effect or just having this
ability to be able to help theselittle children who, you know,
it makes their little liveseasier.
You know what, it'd be able tohave a nice, comfortable bed to
sleep on.
When, you know, in some casesthey might've been on the floor
or they might've been sharing abed with several other siblings

(01:17:05):
and now to have their own littletoddler bed or, you know,
whatever it may be is just, it'sso special to them, you know?
And they don't care.
Someone used it before them, youknow, it's like, it's my now,
you know, they're excited aboutit.
And it's like, it could be a bed.
It could be a stuffed animal.
They're just, you know, they'reover the moon.
And the events that when I tellpeople all the time, I'm like,

(01:17:29):
if you really want to get afirsthand experience to see how
blessed or how excited thesefamilies or these children feel,
just come volunteer at one ofour events Monday, and you will
see firsthand how excited thesefamilies are.

(01:17:50):
And a lot of them, and we trynot to keep families waiting,
but a lot of them will wait foras long as it takes to come
inside to get some items, youknow?
So we will definitely keeppersevering and keep, you know,
Lord willing growing thisnonprofit as far as we can take
it.
Like I said, it came from such alittle idea and, you know, we

(01:18:13):
only have like a few pieces ofclothing out and a little, you
know, swinging in the car seatfor our first one to now we're
like, our storage is full.
Like I cannot, I can't even openthe door.
You know, we have so manydonations, so we are definitely

Speaker 3 (01:18:27):
Congratulations.
Really.
Thank you.
Thank you for your service.
Really.
It's a beautiful story to shareand inspiring, and it's perfect
timing with the holidays comingup and the year that it's been,
you know, so thank you again fordedicating yourselves to helping
others.
And hopefully we can all, uh,aspire to do the same.

Speaker 4 (01:18:49):
Yeah.
All right.

Speaker 3 (01:18:51):
Thank you so much, Anita and Todd for spending your
evening with us, it has beenreally informative and
inspirational, emotional andenlightening.
So I just really appreciate youfeeling comfortable to share
everything that you did becauseI know it's hard to be you and
you are so graceful with the waythat you communicate your

(01:19:15):
feelings and all of that.
And I hope that our listenerscan take some solid takeaways
and be inspired like me.

Speaker 4 (01:19:21):
Thank you.
Thank you for having me.
Thank you so much.

Speaker 3 (01:19:27):
Thank you for listening to awakened and
America.
If you enjoyed today's podcast,be sure to subscribe and leave a
review.
You can also find us onInstagram at awakened in
America.
That's awakened underscore inunderscore America and remember
be mindful, be grateful.

(01:19:49):
And most of all be you.