August 28, 2025 • 26 mins
What happens when we untangle our sense of self-worth from our bank accounts? Diving deep into the messy, emotional landscape where money and identity intersect, this episode explores how cultural conditioning, family dynamics, and societal messaging shape our relationship with abundance.
I share my raw, unfiltered journey—from watching my parents work multiple jobs and fight over finances to my own experience with bankruptcy as a young mother. That rock-bottom moment forced me to confront not just my financial habits, but the deeper beliefs I held about my own worthiness. The path from scarcity to abundance wasn't linear, requiring me to challenge the "hustle and grind" mentality I'd inherited and recognize that working myself into exhaustion wasn't proof of my value.
For many of us, especially those from immigrant families or communities of color, money wounds are ancestral. We carry beliefs about sacrifice, stability, and "staying humble" as a form of loyalty to our family's struggles. Yet our ancestors didn't sacrifice so we would continue suffering—they dreamed of abundance for us. Healing our relationship with money actually honors their sacrifices.
Through practical mindset shifts, journaling prompts, and a guided meditation, this episode offers tools to transform your relationship with money. Replace "I can't afford this" with "How can I create this?" and "I'm bad with money" with "I'm learning to be in partnership with money." These aren't just semantic changes—they represent a fundamental shift in how you view yourself in relation to abundance.
Ready to reclaim your financial power? Grab your journal, find a quiet space, and join me in this transformative conversation about money, worth, and the courage to believe you deserve more.
Join the waitlist for The Inner Shift: 12 Week Coaching Program
Email: dora@dorapraxedis.com
Follow Dora on Instagram @dpraxedis
Check out the website: www.dorapraxedis.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Dora (00:09):
Ay Mijita.
Welcome back to another episodeof Ay Mijita Embracing your
Roots, Reclaim your Essentia.
Soy tu host, Dora AliciaPraxedis, intuitive guide,
healer, and your hermana,walking this path of
self-discovery with you.
Today's tema is one that I knowso many of us secretly wrestle
with.
But don't always talk about outloud Money and worthiness.
(00:32):
We're going to break this downfrom all angles what our culture
taught us, what our familiesmodeled, how society tries to
measure us by numbers and how wecan reclaim a healthier,
empowered relationship withmoney and our own value.
This episode will be deep, rawand also practical.
(00:54):
Voy a compartir my ownstruggles with money, such as
bankruptcy, undercharging, guilt, and how I started shifting my
mindset.
And at the end I'll guide youthrough a short journaling
practice and meditation toconnect with your inner
abundance.
So ponte comoda, grab yourcafecito or agüita maybe your
(01:15):
journal and let's dive intoraíces of money and worth.
Let's start with naming thewound Because, cariño, if we
(01:40):
don't name it, we can't heal it.
Growing up, many of us hearddichos like El dinero no crece
en los árboles, más vale poquito, pero honrado hay que aguantar,
y la otra is the other.
One is que soy humilde, likehumildad equals poverty.
These phrases sound like wisdombut underneath they teach us
(02:03):
scarcity.
They teach us to play small, toaccept less, to settle, to be
grateful for the bare minimum,even when our souls crave more.
Money became tight to sacrifice, and especially in my household
.
If you worked yourself to thebone then maybe you were
deserving, but if you rested orasked for more you were labeled
(02:23):
as selfish or presumida.
So for me and our family moneywas tight.
I totally got that from myparents.
I remember my mom she wouldalways sit at the kitchen table
she's the one that kind of hadthe finances.
My dad he would go out to workand he was considered the
breadwinner.
I know my dad madesignificantly more than my mom
(02:46):
and I remember they would fightall the time, especially with
when it came to credit cards orlike paying for stuff, medical
bills.
I know there was like medicalemergencies that came up and my
mom and dad didn't have moneyfor those different things.
Especially when it came up for,you know, to an emergency fund
(03:13):
and money was a big source ofarguments between my parents.
I know my dad would always bailmy mom out in a way, or like he
would come and save the day,kind of thing.
But one other thing I rememberwas my sisters and I we would
play la tendita, like we wouldtake everything out of the
pantry, you know the like wewould pretend to have like a
(03:36):
grocery store.
And I remember one time we gotmy mom's checks and we ended up
writing all over them.
She was mad and I liked thembecause there were those
duplicate ones.
You know they have the carboncopy in the, you know when you
rip off the check and that.
So it was kind of cool.
I mean.
I think that's where my myfascination for accounting or
cashiering started, because Idid work at Walmart right at my
(03:58):
senior year in high school andeventually I worked in the cash
office.
I would have to go in like 4.30in the morning and prepare like
the different, you know, counta lot of money.
I would count like hundreds ofthousands of dollars, like I
think that's where I becamesensitized, desensitized, my
correction to seeing largeamounts of money.
(04:19):
And because we're in the era Iremember back to school my mom
had three daughters right and wekind of cared what we dressed
like, especially when we got tohigh school, but we would go, I
remember, to the store we wouldbuy the school supplies, we
would buy clothes, and this wasaround the era or around the
(04:39):
time we would go to Mexico liketwo or three times a year,
driving down there and my momwould put it on credit cards and
then paying for the back toschool fees.
You know the schools, and if wedid sports which we didn't do
or any afterschool activitieswhich we didn't do, then that
was an extra cost.
From what I remember, we reallydidn't talk about money.
(05:00):
All I saw was my mom and dadstressed, my mom eventually got
a part-time job and my dad didtoo, and they would just work,
work, work like tirelessly.
My dad had three jobs.
At one point he would leavelike at four in the morning to
do like this breakfast gig insome restaurant, and then he
would come home and then go tohis full-time job, second shift,
(05:22):
and then he would fix cars onthe weekends or he would take
side jobs.
So, yeah, my parents weredefinitely hustlers and that's
where I learned that work ethic.
Now take a moment, mi hijita,think back to your earliest
money memory.
Was it about bills, a piggybank, your parents working
(05:42):
overtime?
How did it make you feel Safe,anxious, guilty?
Write that down in your journal, if you can.
Here's the truth bomb yourself-worth is not your net worth
.
Pero, we live in society thatconfuses the two.
You probably felt it when yourpaycheck was small, you felt
(06:04):
small.
When you finally had money, youfelt powerful for a moment.
That emotional roller coasterkeeps us trapped, but your worth
was never tied to a paycheck.
You were born worthy.
You were born having that rightto have that abundance.
Your worth is in your being,not your doing.
Money comes and goes.
It's energy, it's flow.
(06:25):
Worthiness is eternal.
Tú eres digna, tú vales.
So for me, this worthinessthing really showed up for me
leading up to when my youngestson was born, which Julian is
now 14.
I remember I got into a caraccident with him when I was
(06:48):
pregnant and it kind of Ispiraled out of control with
that one because I had to paythe deductible, I didn't have
the money.
I didn't have $500 for theinsurance, and we had
accumulated a lot of credit carddebt because Fili lost his job
when I was in my junior year incollege at DePaul and I ended up
(07:10):
losing my jobs too, and it cameto a point where I didn't know
what to do.
We were looking at each otherin the living room, and we had
just got this condo in Rosellein my hometown and we were going
to buy it and we just didn'thave the money for rent, we
(07:31):
didn't have money for food andwe eventually started using
credit cards to get us by.
I had to get out student loansbecause I did have a full ride
paid for from DePaul.
I got a lot of grants andscholarships and that was so
such a crummy black era timebecause Fili and I we weren't
(07:52):
not in the best relationshipeither because we didn't know
how to communicate.
We both came up broke like or Imean, let's just say, not
completely powerish, but withthat poverty mentality in our
families.
And so shortly after my son wasborn, that's when I declared
(08:12):
myself bankruptcy because Iwanted and credit card.
Seriously, it was,000.
It wasn't even all that much.
I totally, we totally, couldhave crawled out of that one.
But you get so desperate inthese times where scarcity
mindset wins over and with anewborn I felt like I just
(08:33):
wanted to start fresh and itkind of really screwed up my
life because for seven years,and especially being an
accountant, and that for sevenyears I couldn't do like, I
couldn't get out any credit.
I had to kind of like stick bywith whatever I had.
And just the cycle didn't stopright, because at the seven year
mark I ended up like creepingup with credit cards again.
(08:55):
And that's when, about two,three years ago, I started
really looking at our financesand I at first would pay
attention to, like Dave Ramseyand that but I mean no offense,
but offensively it's an oldwhite dude, right.
What is he going to know abouta person of color, latina, like
me trying to get by?
So I understood the principles,I shared it with my friends and
(09:18):
I shared it with coworkers andthat and it was successful for
many of them.
I was getting by like payingaggressively towards debt.
But the other thing to thatequation that the math didn't
make sense was I felt like shit,like I felt like I couldn't do
anything, I couldn't buy coffee,I couldn't eat anything outside
of the budget and all but abudget is supposed to be
(09:40):
permission to spend, right, it'ssupposed to, and the debt is
your blessings that you gotalready.
Look at it from that point ofview Instead of getting
reprimanded.
I didn't feel heard, I didn'tfeel understood, I didn't feel
validated that I made thesedecisions because that point in
time I was desperate, like Ineeded to get my family by, we
needed to eat, we needed to havea place to stay, pay the bills.
(10:03):
And so now, like we're in sucha better place and I did recoup
my credit and I still havecredit cards that I sometimes
use, but I try to pay them off.
And some of these credit cards,it's ridiculous, they have like
almost 30% interest.
That is crazy.
So, with the newborn and losingour jobs was such a big
(10:28):
awakening that I think that'swhere I finally understood the
value of mindset, of doing itfor my kids, like doing it
meaning, like getting out ofthat debt, having that financial
freedom.
That was one of my goals andthat is my one of my goals and
(10:48):
we go through these lessons inlife just to learn and value the
life we do create and have.
And seriously, that brought meto my knees, like that whole
bankruptcy thing and feeling sohelpless.
That's when, shortly after Istarted therapy, I did see my
life coach.
(11:09):
I started meeting with my lifecoach and I looked into like
those finances, the books, right, and around that time time like
Dave Ramsey was the only onekind of person that I would
follow.
But then slowly did I startlearning about the spirituality
and how to create abundance.
I started following differentinfluencers, let's just say, or
(11:30):
podcasts like let there be loosewas one of them.
That brought me intospirituality world and that's
when I started realizing I dohave qualities and it started to
dismantle the gaslightingconditioning I was growing up
with that.
We had to work, hustle and grind, and this was the only way of
life.
And then I hurt my back andthat was another episode which
(11:53):
we'll save all that for anotherday.
But, feeling worthy, I alwaystied that with money.
I always tied it with thecareer I had and I was always
thinking, oh, my salary is mynet worth and no, it's not.
Actually, you're meant for somuch more.
And I always joke that I wantedto be a millionaire.
(12:13):
And now I sit down and think,oh, wow, like, based on the
investments that I've done my401k at work, the savings, the
cars, the assets and it tooktime, because right now I'm 38
and it took a long time to getto this place.
But it also had a lot ofdownfalls and losing a lot in
(12:36):
the in the trajectory.
So it's all learning and you'regetting closer to that million,
or you're getting closer tothat goal that you have in your
mind.
So grab your journal, if youhave it, or you could say it out
loud and finish these prompts.
If I believed I was alreadyworthy, I would, and finish that
(13:00):
sentence, all right.
The second sentence is where amI currently undervaluing myself
?
Relationships, work, self-carelike filling my cup.
Now sit with these and comeback to this and really dig in a
(13:25):
little deeper as to what makesyou feel worthy.
Money wounds aren't just ours.
They're ancestral.
Our abuelitos and parents livedin survival mode.
For many, money meant migration, backbreaking labor, sending
money home, sacrificing joy forstability.
(13:46):
And because we love them, weunconsciously carry their
beliefs Don't waste, don't dreamtoo big, don't ask for too much
.
Don't dream too big.
Don't ask for too much.
But listen.
Your ancestors' dream was notfor you to suffer the same way.
They prayed for your abundance.
Healing your relationship withmoney is honoring them.
(14:11):
So, with my parents workingmultiple jobs, they were never
home and they were always soconcerned about keeping up with
the rest of the family on whohad the best car, who had the
best house and the latestgadgets, and oftentimes my mom.
She would not buy stuff forherself at times because she
wanted us to have what we needed.
(14:33):
And they often went to workwhen they were sick, like they
were really really sick, likecold and the works and all, and
they would go to work anywaysick.
And so the way I honor themtoday is I allow myself to take
care of my health, especially mymental health, and I work with
(14:54):
my therapist and I'm present inthe moment, in the here and now.
I have a gratitude practicewhere I'm grateful for all the
things that I do have and ifsomething adverse happens and
pops up, like I don't have moneyto cover certain things because
of cash flow, it's like I tryto work it out.
I don't try to work myself tothe ground just to make sure
(15:19):
that I'm, you know the moneymoney is coming in like that, to
the detriment of my health.
It's taken me many years torewrite that poor mentality
mindset that my parents had andthat I embodied for such a long
time.
The hustle and the grind thatis very unnecessary and I've
(15:45):
adopted kind of that worksmarter, not harder, philosophy.
And so my parents and mygrandparents, that's what they
knew right, it was work hard,physical labor, and I had the
opportunity to go to college andI also do work physical labor
at times, but fortunately for me, I never had to work like a
(16:08):
warehouse job or something tothe like.
But I know it's difficult, it'svery difficult working in those
trades, but it took a lot ofwork and dedication and multiple
jobs at one point.
So understand that yourancestors and your loved ones,
(16:28):
they are so proud of you becausethey were praying for you to
have the wealth, the abundance,to be better off than they were.
That's why they struggled,that's why they sacrificed.
And that's where I understandmy mom and dad coming over to
the States from Mexico, becausethey wanted to settle down, they
wanted to provide their familya better life and they did.
(16:50):
And it's up to us to decidewhat kind of life we want.
And that's what their hope was.
Was it for us to have a betterlife than they had in all
different ways?
The other notable thing is nowI have a stable, great job and
(17:12):
I'm able to participate in mykids' activities.
Stable, great job and I'm ableto participate in my kids'
activities and I'm able to drivethem to and from, like the you
know, the soccer, the clubs, anyafter school events.
I'm able to go to field tripswhen they were younger.
So having that flexibility as aparent and being a present
parent for me has been such ablessing and that's one thing
(17:34):
that has paid off for me.
Now close your eyes for a second, if you can, and whisper
Gracias, ancestors.
I honor your sacrifices.
I no longer carry poverty asloyalty.
I choose abundance.
In your honor, let's talkpractical shifts, because
(18:04):
mindset work isn't just airy,it's daily.
Start with language Replace.
I can't afford this with.
How can I create this orreplace?
Nobody will pay me with.
The right people will invest inmy gifts.
And the last one is you canreplace.
(18:26):
Is I'm bad with money, you canreplace it with.
I'm learning to be inpartnership with money.
I'm learning to be inpartnership with money.
Money is not your enemy, it's atool.
Un intercambio you share yourlight, your gifts and money
flows back to you.
So for me, I used to.
(18:47):
When I offered my services ormy gifts, I would actually not
charge.
Or my gifts, I would actuallynot charge.
I was guilty of, you know,offering them for free and I
would spend hours.
I remember I did a consultationwith someone and I sat with
them for about four hours and Idid not charge them or I.
At the end I would say, oh, I'ma donation based.
(19:07):
You can, you know, kind of giveme whatever you'd like, and I
would get like 10 books, 20books, and now I have a flat
rate for my time.
That also creates a boundarythat for the hour that I'm there
, I usually ask.
You know my intuition, divine,to allow the time for whatever
(19:30):
needs to come through andwhatever this person needs, to
prioritize those things.
And for me, investing in myselfhas been such a game changer
Like I've invested in coachesand healers and workshops and it
felt so scary, but at the endI've been able to shift and
(19:50):
transform, and so earlier thisyear I began to invest in
several hundred, if notthousands, of dollars in
business coaches, and being ableto read the Akashic Records was
a program I invested in in thepast and years ago I signed up
for all these programs and allthese classes to get certified
(20:11):
in being a life coach and beingable to do this sacred work
because I did want to understandit.
Lead group coaching that wassomething that I was drawn to as
well, and being able to lead ameditation, open the sacred
space, work with my shaman, dida few courses with him and all
(20:34):
of that was so eye-awakening.
And the biggest thing I learnedwas if you're not charging or
if you're not like if you givestuff for free, you are not.
You are taken away from thatperson that's receiving and
willing to invest in what youhave to give, you're missing out
(20:56):
on the exchange.
And once they invest, or ifthere's an exchange of money,
that's where, on an energeticlevel, you're giving them that
value.
Now a special note for my mamas,the stay-homeas.
That is by far the hardest jobI think anyone has, because you
(21:19):
are the CEO not only of yourhousehold, but of all the things
that are going on.
So think about it.
If you were to outsource allthose things that you do on a
daily and I'm talking aboutstay-home moms specifically
you're already a millionaire.
If you were to outsource allthe things you do, such as cook
and clean yard work, if you goout there preschool, if you have
(21:44):
little ones, or drop-offs andpickups, and itemize all that,
because you're also theaccountant of the family, you're
the teacher of the family,you're a wife and there's so
many different things you haveto cater to Grocery, shopping,
uber, lyft, whatever you want tocall it All those things.
(22:04):
If you combine them hiring acook those things aren't cheap.
So kudos to you, and I have alot of respect for stay-at-home
moms, because that is by far themost difficult job I think in
the world and being there foryour kiddos that is precious
right, invaluable time thatyou're spending with them.
So honor yourself when it comesto what you're giving and what
(22:26):
you are receiving, because somethings definitely don't have a
dollar amount attached to it.
Now let's journal.
Here are a couple of prompts.
Write down three limitingbeliefs you carry about money.
Then I'm going to task you withrewriting them into empowering
statements.
Ask yourself what is the costof undervaluing myself?
(22:51):
Ahora, let's close with apractice.
If you can put one hand on yourcorazón and the other on your
(23:11):
belly, take a deep breath in andout and out.
Visualize a golden lightentering your body Warm, loving,
(23:37):
abundant.
See this light filling yourentire being.
Whisper to yourself I am worthy, I am safe, I am abundant.
(24:06):
Now imagine holding in yourhand, not with fear but with
gratitude.
Feel it as energy, energyflowing in and out with ease,
(24:28):
and you can pause this and stayhere as long as you'd like.
When you're ready, take a deepbreath in and out.
Now take your journal and writethese questions what does
(25:00):
financial freedom look like forme?
If I trusted I was fully worthy, how would I use money as a
tool for joy, for healing, forcommunity?
Breathe that in.
(25:20):
You are enough.
Thank you.
Ay Mijita.
Welcome back to another episodeof Ay Mijita Embracing your
Roots, Reclaim your Essentia.
Soy tu host, Dora AliciaPraxedis, intuitive guide,
healer, and your hermana,walking this path of
self-discovery with you.
Today's tema is one that I knowso many of us secretly wrestle
with.
But don't always talk about outloud Money and worthiness.
(00:32):
We're going to break this downfrom all angles what our culture
taught us, what our familiesmodeled, how society tries to
measure us by numbers and how wecan reclaim a healthier,
empowered relationship withmoney and our own value.
This episode will be deep, rawand also practical.
(00:54):
Voy a compartir my ownstruggles with money, such as
bankruptcy, undercharging, guilt, and how I started shifting my
mindset.
And at the end I'll guide youthrough a short journaling
practice and meditation toconnect with your inner
abundance.
So ponte comoda, grab yourcafecito or agüita maybe your
(01:15):
journal and let's dive intoraíces of money and worth.
Let's start with naming thewound Because, cariño, if we
(01:40):
don't name it, we can't heal it.
Growing up, many of us hearddichos like El dinero no crece
en los árboles, más vale poquito, pero honrado hay que aguantar,
y la otra is the other.
One is que soy humilde, likehumildad equals poverty.
These phrases sound like wisdombut underneath they teach us
(02:03):
scarcity.
They teach us to play small, toaccept less, to settle, to be
grateful for the bare minimum,even when our souls crave more.
Money became tight to sacrifice, and especially in my household
.
If you worked yourself to thebone then maybe you were
deserving, but if you rested orasked for more you were labeled
(02:23):
as selfish or presumida.
So for me and our family moneywas tight.
I totally got that from myparents.
I remember my mom she wouldalways sit at the kitchen table
she's the one that kind of hadthe finances.
My dad he would go out to workand he was considered the
breadwinner.
I know my dad madesignificantly more than my mom
(02:46):
and I remember they would fightall the time, especially with
when it came to credit cards orlike paying for stuff, medical
bills.
I know there was like medicalemergencies that came up and my
mom and dad didn't have moneyfor those different things.
Especially when it came up for,you know, to an emergency fund
(03:13):
and money was a big source ofarguments between my parents.
I know my dad would always bailmy mom out in a way, or like he
would come and save the day,kind of thing.
But one other thing I rememberwas my sisters and I we would
play la tendita, like we wouldtake everything out of the
pantry, you know the like wewould pretend to have like a
(03:36):
grocery store.
And I remember one time we gotmy mom's checks and we ended up
writing all over them.
She was mad and I liked thembecause there were those
duplicate ones.
You know they have the carboncopy in the, you know when you
rip off the check and that.
So it was kind of cool.
I mean.
I think that's where my myfascination for accounting or
cashiering started, because Idid work at Walmart right at my
(03:58):
senior year in high school andeventually I worked in the cash
office.
I would have to go in like 4.30in the morning and prepare like
the different, you know, counta lot of money.
I would count like hundreds ofthousands of dollars, like I
think that's where I becamesensitized, desensitized, my
correction to seeing largeamounts of money.
(04:19):
And because we're in the era Iremember back to school my mom
had three daughters right and wekind of cared what we dressed
like, especially when we got tohigh school, but we would go, I
remember, to the store we wouldbuy the school supplies, we
would buy clothes, and this wasaround the era or around the
(04:39):
time we would go to Mexico liketwo or three times a year,
driving down there and my momwould put it on credit cards and
then paying for the back toschool fees.
You know the schools, and if wedid sports which we didn't do
or any afterschool activitieswhich we didn't do, then that
was an extra cost.
From what I remember, we reallydidn't talk about money.
(05:00):
All I saw was my mom and dadstressed, my mom eventually got
a part-time job and my dad didtoo, and they would just work,
work, work like tirelessly.
My dad had three jobs.
At one point he would leavelike at four in the morning to
do like this breakfast gig insome restaurant, and then he
would come home and then go tohis full-time job, second shift,
(05:22):
and then he would fix cars onthe weekends or he would take
side jobs.
So, yeah, my parents weredefinitely hustlers and that's
where I learned that work ethic.
Now take a moment, mi hijita,think back to your earliest
money memory.
Was it about bills, a piggybank, your parents working
(05:42):
overtime?
How did it make you feel Safe,anxious, guilty?
Write that down in your journal, if you can.
Here's the truth bomb yourself-worth is not your net worth
.
Pero, we live in society thatconfuses the two.
You probably felt it when yourpaycheck was small, you felt
(06:04):
small.
When you finally had money, youfelt powerful for a moment.
That emotional roller coasterkeeps us trapped, but your worth
was never tied to a paycheck.
You were born worthy.
You were born having that rightto have that abundance.
Your worth is in your being,not your doing.
Money comes and goes.
It's energy, it's flow.
(06:25):
Worthiness is eternal.
Tú eres digna, tú vales.
So for me, this worthinessthing really showed up for me
leading up to when my youngestson was born, which Julian is
now 14.
I remember I got into a caraccident with him when I was
(06:48):
pregnant and it kind of Ispiraled out of control with
that one because I had to paythe deductible, I didn't have
the money.
I didn't have $500 for theinsurance, and we had
accumulated a lot of credit carddebt because Fili lost his job
when I was in my junior year incollege at DePaul and I ended up
(07:10):
losing my jobs too, and it cameto a point where I didn't know
what to do.
We were looking at each otherin the living room, and we had
just got this condo in Rosellein my hometown and we were going
to buy it and we just didn'thave the money for rent, we
(07:31):
didn't have money for food andwe eventually started using
credit cards to get us by.
I had to get out student loansbecause I did have a full ride
paid for from DePaul.
I got a lot of grants andscholarships and that was so
such a crummy black era timebecause Fili and I we weren't
(07:52):
not in the best relationshipeither because we didn't know
how to communicate.
We both came up broke like or Imean, let's just say, not
completely powerish, but withthat poverty mentality in our
families.
And so shortly after my son wasborn, that's when I declared
(08:12):
myself bankruptcy because Iwanted and credit card.
Seriously, it was,000.
It wasn't even all that much.
I totally, we totally, couldhave crawled out of that one.
But you get so desperate inthese times where scarcity
mindset wins over and with anewborn I felt like I just
(08:33):
wanted to start fresh and itkind of really screwed up my
life because for seven years,and especially being an
accountant, and that for sevenyears I couldn't do like, I
couldn't get out any credit.
I had to kind of like stick bywith whatever I had.
And just the cycle didn't stopright, because at the seven year
mark I ended up like creepingup with credit cards again.
(08:55):
And that's when, about two,three years ago, I started
really looking at our financesand I at first would pay
attention to, like Dave Ramseyand that but I mean no offense,
but offensively it's an oldwhite dude, right.
What is he going to know abouta person of color, latina, like
me trying to get by?
So I understood the principles,I shared it with my friends and
(09:18):
I shared it with coworkers andthat and it was successful for
many of them.
I was getting by like payingaggressively towards debt.
But the other thing to thatequation that the math didn't
make sense was I felt like shit,like I felt like I couldn't do
anything, I couldn't buy coffee,I couldn't eat anything outside
of the budget and all but abudget is supposed to be
(09:40):
permission to spend, right, it'ssupposed to, and the debt is
your blessings that you gotalready.
Look at it from that point ofview Instead of getting
reprimanded.
I didn't feel heard, I didn'tfeel understood, I didn't feel
validated that I made thesedecisions because that point in
time I was desperate, like Ineeded to get my family by, we
needed to eat, we needed to havea place to stay, pay the bills.
(10:03):
And so now, like we're in sucha better place and I did recoup
my credit and I still havecredit cards that I sometimes
use, but I try to pay them off.
And some of these credit cards,it's ridiculous, they have like
almost 30% interest.
That is crazy.
So, with the newborn and losingour jobs was such a big
(10:28):
awakening that I think that'swhere I finally understood the
value of mindset, of doing itfor my kids, like doing it
meaning, like getting out ofthat debt, having that financial
freedom.
That was one of my goals andthat is my one of my goals and
(10:48):
we go through these lessons inlife just to learn and value the
life we do create and have.
And seriously, that brought meto my knees, like that whole
bankruptcy thing and feeling sohelpless.
That's when, shortly after Istarted therapy, I did see my
life coach.
(11:09):
I started meeting with my lifecoach and I looked into like
those finances, the books, right, and around that time time like
Dave Ramsey was the only onekind of person that I would
follow.
But then slowly did I startlearning about the spirituality
and how to create abundance.
I started following differentinfluencers, let's just say, or
(11:30):
podcasts like let there be loosewas one of them.
That brought me intospirituality world and that's
when I started realizing I dohave qualities and it started to
dismantle the gaslightingconditioning I was growing up
with that.
We had to work, hustle and grind, and this was the only way of
life.
And then I hurt my back andthat was another episode which
(11:53):
we'll save all that for anotherday.
But, feeling worthy, I alwaystied that with money.
I always tied it with thecareer I had and I was always
thinking, oh, my salary is mynet worth and no, it's not.
Actually, you're meant for somuch more.
And I always joke that I wantedto be a millionaire.
(12:13):
And now I sit down and think,oh, wow, like, based on the
investments that I've done my401k at work, the savings, the
cars, the assets and it tooktime, because right now I'm 38
and it took a long time to getto this place.
But it also had a lot ofdownfalls and losing a lot in
(12:36):
the in the trajectory.
So it's all learning and you'regetting closer to that million,
or you're getting closer tothat goal that you have in your
mind.
So grab your journal, if youhave it, or you could say it out
loud and finish these prompts.
If I believed I was alreadyworthy, I would, and finish that
(13:00):
sentence, all right.
The second sentence is where amI currently undervaluing myself
?
Relationships, work, self-carelike filling my cup.
Now sit with these and comeback to this and really dig in a
(13:25):
little deeper as to what makesyou feel worthy.
Money wounds aren't just ours.
They're ancestral.
Our abuelitos and parents livedin survival mode.
For many, money meant migration, backbreaking labor, sending
money home, sacrificing joy forstability.
(13:46):
And because we love them, weunconsciously carry their
beliefs Don't waste, don't dreamtoo big, don't ask for too much
.
Don't dream too big.
Don't ask for too much.
But listen.
Your ancestors' dream was notfor you to suffer the same way.
They prayed for your abundance.
Healing your relationship withmoney is honoring them.
(14:11):
So, with my parents workingmultiple jobs, they were never
home and they were always soconcerned about keeping up with
the rest of the family on whohad the best car, who had the
best house and the latestgadgets, and oftentimes my mom.
She would not buy stuff forherself at times because she
wanted us to have what we needed.
(14:33):
And they often went to workwhen they were sick, like they
were really really sick, likecold and the works and all, and
they would go to work anywaysick.
And so the way I honor themtoday is I allow myself to take
care of my health, especially mymental health, and I work with
(14:54):
my therapist and I'm present inthe moment, in the here and now.
I have a gratitude practicewhere I'm grateful for all the
things that I do have and ifsomething adverse happens and
pops up, like I don't have moneyto cover certain things because
of cash flow, it's like I tryto work it out.
I don't try to work myself tothe ground just to make sure
(15:19):
that I'm, you know the moneymoney is coming in like that, to
the detriment of my health.
It's taken me many years torewrite that poor mentality
mindset that my parents had andthat I embodied for such a long
time.
The hustle and the grind thatis very unnecessary and I've
(15:45):
adopted kind of that worksmarter, not harder, philosophy.
And so my parents and mygrandparents, that's what they
knew right, it was work hard,physical labor, and I had the
opportunity to go to college andI also do work physical labor
at times, but fortunately for me, I never had to work like a
(16:08):
warehouse job or something tothe like.
But I know it's difficult, it'svery difficult working in those
trades, but it took a lot ofwork and dedication and multiple
jobs at one point.
So understand that yourancestors and your loved ones,
(16:28):
they are so proud of you becausethey were praying for you to
have the wealth, the abundance,to be better off than they were.
That's why they struggled,that's why they sacrificed.
And that's where I understandmy mom and dad coming over to
the States from Mexico, becausethey wanted to settle down, they
wanted to provide their familya better life and they did.
(16:50):
And it's up to us to decidewhat kind of life we want.
And that's what their hope was.
Was it for us to have a betterlife than they had in all
different ways?
The other notable thing is nowI have a stable, great job and
(17:12):
I'm able to participate in mykids' activities.
Stable, great job and I'm ableto participate in my kids'
activities and I'm able to drivethem to and from, like the you
know, the soccer, the clubs, anyafter school events.
I'm able to go to field tripswhen they were younger.
So having that flexibility as aparent and being a present
parent for me has been such ablessing and that's one thing
(17:34):
that has paid off for me.
Now close your eyes for a second, if you can, and whisper
Gracias, ancestors.
I honor your sacrifices.
I no longer carry poverty asloyalty.
I choose abundance.
In your honor, let's talkpractical shifts, because
(18:04):
mindset work isn't just airy,it's daily.
Start with language Replace.
I can't afford this with.
How can I create this orreplace?
Nobody will pay me with.
The right people will invest inmy gifts.
And the last one is you canreplace.
(18:26):
Is I'm bad with money, you canreplace it with.
I'm learning to be inpartnership with money.
I'm learning to be inpartnership with money.
Money is not your enemy, it's atool.
Un intercambio you share yourlight, your gifts and money
flows back to you.
So for me, I used to.
(18:47):
When I offered my services ormy gifts, I would actually not
charge.
Or my gifts, I would actuallynot charge.
I was guilty of, you know,offering them for free and I
would spend hours.
I remember I did a consultationwith someone and I sat with
them for about four hours and Idid not charge them or I.
At the end I would say, oh, I'ma donation based.
(19:07):
You can, you know, kind of giveme whatever you'd like, and I
would get like 10 books, 20books, and now I have a flat
rate for my time.
That also creates a boundarythat for the hour that I'm there
, I usually ask.
You know my intuition, divine,to allow the time for whatever
(19:30):
needs to come through andwhatever this person needs, to
prioritize those things.
And for me, investing in myselfhas been such a game changer
Like I've invested in coachesand healers and workshops and it
felt so scary, but at the endI've been able to shift and
(19:50):
transform, and so earlier thisyear I began to invest in
several hundred, if notthousands, of dollars in
business coaches, and being ableto read the Akashic Records was
a program I invested in in thepast and years ago I signed up
for all these programs and allthese classes to get certified
(20:11):
in being a life coach and beingable to do this sacred work
because I did want to understandit.
Lead group coaching that wassomething that I was drawn to as
well, and being able to lead ameditation, open the sacred
space, work with my shaman, dida few courses with him and all
(20:34):
of that was so eye-awakening.
And the biggest thing I learnedwas if you're not charging or
if you're not like if you givestuff for free, you are not.
You are taken away from thatperson that's receiving and
willing to invest in what youhave to give, you're missing out
(20:56):
on the exchange.
And once they invest, or ifthere's an exchange of money,
that's where, on an energeticlevel, you're giving them that
value.
Now a special note for my mamas,the stay-homeas.
That is by far the hardest jobI think anyone has, because you
(21:19):
are the CEO not only of yourhousehold, but of all the things
that are going on.
So think about it.
If you were to outsource allthose things that you do on a
daily and I'm talking aboutstay-home moms specifically
you're already a millionaire.
If you were to outsource allthe things you do, such as cook
and clean yard work, if you goout there preschool, if you have
(21:44):
little ones, or drop-offs andpickups, and itemize all that,
because you're also theaccountant of the family, you're
the teacher of the family,you're a wife and there's so
many different things you haveto cater to Grocery, shopping,
uber, lyft, whatever you want tocall it All those things.
(22:04):
If you combine them hiring acook those things aren't cheap.
So kudos to you, and I have alot of respect for stay-at-home
moms, because that is by far themost difficult job I think in
the world and being there foryour kiddos that is precious
right, invaluable time thatyou're spending with them.
So honor yourself when it comesto what you're giving and what
(22:26):
you are receiving, because somethings definitely don't have a
dollar amount attached to it.
Now let's journal.
Here are a couple of prompts.
Write down three limitingbeliefs you carry about money.
Then I'm going to task you withrewriting them into empowering
statements.
Ask yourself what is the costof undervaluing myself?
(22:51):
Ahora, let's close with apractice.
If you can put one hand on yourcorazón and the other on your
(23:11):
belly, take a deep breath in andout and out.
Visualize a golden lightentering your body Warm, loving,
(23:37):
abundant.
See this light filling yourentire being.
Whisper to yourself I am worthy, I am safe, I am abundant.
(24:06):
Now imagine holding in yourhand, not with fear but with
gratitude.
Feel it as energy, energyflowing in and out with ease,
(24:28):
and you can pause this and stayhere as long as you'd like.
When you're ready, take a deepbreath in and out.
Now take your journal and writethese questions what does
(25:00):
financial freedom look like forme?
If I trusted I was fully worthy, how would I use money as a
tool for joy, for healing, forcommunity?
Breathe that in.
(25:20):
You are enough.
Thank you.
Popular Podcasts
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
Cardiac Cowboys
The heart was always off-limits to surgeons. Cutting into it spelled instant death for the patient. That is, until a ragtag group of doctors scattered across the Midwest and Texas decided to throw out the rule book. Working in makeshift laboratories and home garages, using medical devices made from scavenged machine parts and beer tubes, these men and women invented the field of open heart surgery. Odds are, someone you know is alive because of them. So why has history left them behind? Presented by Chris Pine, CARDIAC COWBOYS tells the gripping true story behind the birth of heart surgery, and the young, Greatest Generation doctors who made it happen. For years, they competed and feuded, racing to be the first, the best, and the most prolific. Some appeared on the cover of Time Magazine, operated on kings and advised presidents. Others ended up disgraced, penniless, and convicted of felonies. Together, they ignited a revolution in medicine, and changed the world.