March 25, 2025 • 49 mins
Picture this: a well-worn table, rescued from an old hunting lodge, standing at the heart of a bustling blended family home. Not particularly beautiful or expensive, but carved with a "P" by small hands and refinished with love. This humble kitchen table became the gravitational center of our family life - where boundaries were established, hearts were mended, victories celebrated, and a family culture was forged.
In this deeply personal conversation, we reveal how something as simple as consistent family meals became the anchor point that helped our family of six navigate the sometimes choppy waters of blending. We share the intentional practices that made our table sacred ground - the no-phones rule, our cherished "highs and lows" tradition, even the amusing "shirts must be worn" policy (thanks to our perpetually shirtless teenage son).
What's fascinating is that we didn't realize what we were building at the time. We were just trying to wrangle four kids from different households into some semblance of togetherness. But twenty years later, our now-adult children still gravitate to that table when they visit, still ask to share highs and lows, and even our daughter-in-law has embraced these seemingly small but mighty traditions.
Beyond just our table, we explore how creating intentional gathering spaces throughout our home fostered what TikTok now calls a "living room family" - where children naturally gather in common areas rather than retreating to bedrooms. These weren't accidental choices, but deliberate decisions about the kind of family culture we wanted to create.
Whether you're part of a blended family or simply looking to strengthen your family bonds, this episode offers practical wisdom about how physical spaces shape emotional connections. What anchor points are you creating in your home? Where does your family naturally gather? The culture you're building might be happening around something as simple as your kitchen table.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Baggage Claim everybody.
Thank you so much for droppingin to hang out with us for a
little bit.
No matter where you're at whatyou're doing sitting at your
desk, riding in your car, ormaybe even at your kitchen table
, wherever it is grab yourfavorite drink, whatever that is
, maybe whatever time of day itis, grab your favorite drink,
pull up to the table and join ustoday as we dive into a really
(00:25):
cool concept that has to doaround the table.
Before we get into that, though, we want to talk about
something that's, and I'm goingto try to be as best as I can
with this.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
We're going to be emotional.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Yeah, life has seasons and we always say that
life is full of of hills andvalleys, mountaintops and
valleys.
Um, we weren't meant to live onmountaintops, because really
big mountains don't really haveanything growing on them.
No, all the really good growthhappens in the valleys, and
(00:57):
sometimes the valleys, we thinkof them as sad, but they're
actually where a lot of growthhappens.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And some reflection.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Yes, so we've had a season, a big chapter in for us
this week like a big, big turnthe page in the chapter we had
to say goodbye to Honey.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Our teeny old lady stinky doggy yeah, she was our
tiny little thing.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
We had had her.
She'd been in our marriage for13 years.
Jess had had her two yearsprior.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
And she was a rescue when we found her.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Yeah, when we found the—she was rescued from
literally a dumpster.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Yeah, she had bumps on her little ribs.
She had broken ribs yeah wherethey didn't heal properly.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
And when I rescued her and I named her, I just
picked her up and I'm going totry not to get too emotional,
but I just picked her up and shejust made eye contact and I
just said, hey, little honey,and then her name was just Honey
.
Took her to the vet and theywere like she's not a puppy, so
(02:00):
she's probably three or four.
So fast forward to this week,when we had to say goodbye to
her, the vet estimated her atalmost 19 years old.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Yeah, so we can't say it was short.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
No, I mean she was pushing 126 in dog years she was
, but she was just the stinkiestlittle, sweet little she had no
teeth.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
No, she smelled bad.
You give her bad.
She smelled bad, she justcouldn't help it.
But we're riding back in theJeep back from that visit, from
saying goodbye yeah.
And I just told Jess.
I was like this is the end ofthe chapter and she goes.
Well, what do you mean?
And I was like, well, I hadLily when I was by myself and
(02:47):
she helped me through so much,like she was there for me
through, like I talked to her onthe way to work all the time.
I spent so much time with herwhen I didn't have the kids and
then when we got married, shejust became an integrated part
of our family.
Maybe one day I'll tell thestory about when she pooped on
your side of the bed when wewere moving in.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
It's a story from another day, yeah, just trying
to assert dominance.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
But anyway I lost Lily, like five years ago.
She became diabetic.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And so it was just bad.
It just dropped off reallyquick and so we had to say
goodbye to her, which wastraumatic and really, really
hard for me.
It was horrible.
I still have her little tag inmy truck.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yeah, from her collar .
Speaker 1 (03:27):
Her name tag.
Yeah, I carry it with me justto kind of remember that.
And then coming home.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
But then you made that connection with Honey and
me.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah, she was there for you when you walked through
your trauma and your stuff.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
When I was by myself, she slept in the bed with me
and she was my girl.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yeah, and so so.
I put her name tag on my keychain, and so we kind of said
goodbye to the things that webrought into, the things not
outside of our kids, right, butthe thing that we brought that
was very dear to us those twodoggy girls.
Yeah, Kind of helped us througha lot.
And so, man, that's a, I knowwe've all—and some of you may be
(04:05):
like it's just a dog.
It's not either.
Don't ever say that to me.
They walked through a lot withus and it was just kind of fun
for them to be there together.
And now we have two little boys, two—we still have two golden
doodles that are just—and we'lltalk about them some other time.
But anyway, tonight, you know,in that season we have these
(04:27):
things anchors in our lives andfor us, a huge, huge anchor for
our family and you may go like,okay, that's cheesy, but it's
just true is our kitchen table.
It wasn't that we were tryingto.
I mean, I don't want to say weweren't that super smart in what
(04:47):
we did.
Sometimes we just fell intoreally cool things that just
happened in our family.
Yeah, the reality was we livedin a house that had three
stories.
The two boys lived in thebasement, aaron was on the
middle floor and Callie was onthe top floor, and so Callie was
usually always when we were,yeah, always hanging out with us
.
The boys were in the basementbecause there was a pool table
(05:09):
down there in the theater room.
Yeah, their little game area,yeah, so they hung out.
And then Erin.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Grace kind of flitted between Heather and Yon in the
house just whatever washappening.
She was so little.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Yeah.
So our idea was we need someplace we can gather all these
hoodlums together and have someconversation.
So it's like where's that?
Speaker 2 (05:27):
we're like we reign this circus in yeah so we can
all be at the same place at thesame time, and we had two tables
, which was pretty interesting.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
we had a dining room but with your nice table in it
that we never sat at heirloom,yeah, and so we treasures.
We had this old table that Ihad gotten from my mom.
It was a hunting lodge.
It was from a hunting lodgethat they had bought.
They bought and sold realestate, so it was an old hunting
lodge table.
It looked rough, it was prettythough.
It was pretty it had good bones.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
It did have great bones.
That's what we all say.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
And so we took under.
We're like, hey, we're going todo a little fun project
together.
We're going to redo our kitchentable, and so we sanded it down
.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
But the boys said, okay, bye.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Yeah, they didn't have a whole lot to do with it.
The girls were bought in.
Yeah, totally bought in.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
We're going to share the picture of I actually had it
printed on a canvas of Callieand Erin Grace under their table
just sanding their littleselves to pieces, sanding and
painting and I took a knife andjust carved a P into the leg.
Because we were combining Peckand Petillo.
Yes, it was Peck and Petillo.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
So the P kind of worked.
We didn't have to do a P inanother letter, which we would
have if we needed to.
So I said that was one reasonyou married, because I had the
same last name.
I was just about to say thatyou didn't have to change it
into the monogram.
I didn't have to change mymonogram, right?
No?
So it was one of those things.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm a Southern girl.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
That was one of those things we had to have a hard
discussion about wasmonogramming, and maybe we'll
get into that one day.
But we carved a P in there andthen we just painted it and we,
to this day, still have thattable.
It's been expanded and it'sgrown a little bit and then
we've resurfaced the top of itwith some different wood, but we
still have the table.
But that was our first project.
(07:18):
Now at that table, man it was,we didn't just have meals there,
it's kind of like life happenedthere.
Yeah, and that's the reason,honestly, at this podcast, we
have a table.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
If you're watching this on video.
If you're not watching on video, it was really important to
Greg and I to be able to sitdown at a table because, like he
was saying, that's where lifehas happened for our family.
Obviously, life happenseverywhere for our family, but
that was a big anchor point forus.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Well, for me, I think there's so much life.
Change happens and growth canhappen at a table, whether it be
your kitchen table, a dinnertable of a friend or a family
member being out somewhere, evenat a dinner table.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
It's where you sit around.
I need to talk to you aboutsomething.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
It's at a table.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Yeah, it's usually sitting at a table somewhere, so
it's always like gatheredaround.
It's an easy point and there'salways some distance between you
, so you feel comfortable tokind of be who you are.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Sometimes it may sound silly too, but even in my
classroom I teach first grade.
I don't have a desk that I sitat.
I sit at a table.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
So when I meet, even with my littles, I'm like come
sit at my table with me.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
So to invite somebody to your table, no matter where
it's at, is a little bit morecomforting, I think.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
Yeah, to break bread, have a drink with, just to kind
of share life with.
So our kitchen table and wecall it our kitchen table only
because it's set in our kitchensomewhat kind of kitchen
sunroom-ish it's kind of beenyeah, it's always been somewhat
close to the kitchen.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And I say a couple of our houses.
We've only we've lived in threehomes together, right and the
first two homes.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
There was the kitchen table and then there was a
formal dining room, right tableand the only time we ate there
is when we had a party we hadfamily over and that was the
excess table.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Yes, like thanksgiving or something else,
but but in our current home thatwe lived in for five years, we
intentionally chose not to havea formal dining room situation.
This big, giant table in whatused to be a sunroom that we've
turned into our— it's not even adining room.
Like there are no walls in ourhome.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
There are walls in our home.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
But like okay, let me rephrase that it's very open.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
It is very open.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
yes, In the main living kitchen, dining, hanging
out area.
It's all one big place.
Intentionally to draw you tothat table.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Right, and I know if you listen to us or you followed
us.
We talked about our behaviorchart and our boundaries chart,
where we did that.
I don't know if we ever postedthat picture of the boundaries.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
I don't think we did.
I did find it.
I was so happy, okay, so wefound that.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
We're going to post that picture so you can actually
see it doesn't have the kids'signatures on it, it has the raw
version before they signed it.
We'll post that up so you guyscan check it out.
But we did that at our table.
We came up with core values forour family.
We're going to do an episodeabout that but we did those at
(10:39):
our kitchen table.
Our kitchen table was not justa place to sit down and eat.
When I say anchor point, it wasa central point where we got to
come together and talk aboutsometimes hard issues, sometimes
fun issues, sometimes just noteven hard, but just heart issues
, like if one of our kids wasstruggling, that so-and-so was
made fun of, or this, thishappened.
(11:00):
It was a heart to heart kind ofplace and it just they happened
.
It was a heart-to-heart kind ofplace and it just they
associated that table withconversation and it's just, and
when I look back at it I'm likeGod, how did we get that right?
Speaker 2 (11:13):
I don't know, but even as adults they still do.
They still know.
I mean, our oldest and herhusband, callie, and her husband
Charles live out of state inFlorida and Cody lives 45
minutes away but he's stillnearby.
But when we all come togetherthere really is no question of
(11:35):
where a meal or lots of gamesand togetherness happens.
And it's been fun because asour family grows, as our
children get married and now wehave grand girl Lucy she's not
sitting in a chair yet, her highchair's there, but I mean I get
to unfold a folding table andput a tablecloth on it and so
(11:59):
our table keeps extending.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Right.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
And so, and I love when we get to have family at
the house, because you got metwo folding tables and I have
tablecloths that make it allseem like one whole big table.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
But one day we're going to have a really big table
.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
I know it's going to be so cool.
Yeah, I mean well, I mean ourtables.
Seat to eight now, so you canimagine when we have enough
folks over here to have to havea folding table.
It just fills us with so muchjoy to have that many people at
a table together.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, because we look back at when they were little
and we're just trying to wrangleeveryone together.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
We were, but, and then there was a lot of times
when we were trying to figureout how to be a family of six
and eating at home was anecessity because, yeah, I don't
know, and some of you may beout there in blended families
and you just be rolling in cash.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
We didn't have that experience.
That's not us Way to go.
You.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, high five.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
We were like, okay, how do we feed all these kids
and not go broke and pay the?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
power bill.
So eating at home at the tablefrom the parent end of it was
like we have to.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And it became a thing of cooking in the kitchen with
the girls.
The girls really liked thekitchen and so it was a fun
family thing for us and justkind of pushed us more toward
that.
And then we had but we did havesome boundaries to our table-
we did.
Like there were some things wedidn't do at the table and some
things that you Number one rule,the number one rule was't do at
the table, and some things thatyou— Number one rule, the
(13:26):
number one rule was no phones atthe table.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
No electronics at the table.
Yeah, okay, yeah, not hisphones.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Yeah, I was about to say, you had to say electronics.
For Cody.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah, Cody.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Bless his heart.
He's our gamer.
He's always been a gamer.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Yeah, I was going to say the same thing.
He had like his DS or his GameBoy or whatever the case may be.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
He's the kid who would say hey, dad, can you drop
me off at the school Saturdayfor four hours.
I was like to do what?
Well, I'm in this fun team likea club.
It's a club and he goes.
So we spend half the time twohours trying to hack this other
team and this other club triesto defend us, and then in the
second half they try to hack usand we try to defend them, and I
(14:08):
was like four hours on aSaturday morning and he's like
yes, yeah, he was so good and sothat's how he would spend a lot
of his Saturdays sometimes, sowe had to say the word
electronics, because Cody wouldbe the one to figure out,
looking for the loopholes,loopholes.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Looking be the one looking for the loopholes.
Yeah, so that was our numberone, number one rule.
Yeah, our sweetie girls, theyjust went with it.
Thomas was just happy to bethere so he went with it.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
So cody was the only one that kind of pushed that
yeah, and I know if you have ablended family, you have kids
who have other parents and itwasn't like hey, we're taking
your phone away.
It's like for this 45 minutesto an hour that we sit here.
Your phone sits on the islandor sits somewhere else.
It doesn't sit on the table.
We don't stack them on themiddle of the table because they
(14:52):
buzz and then attention's gone.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
That defeats the purpose, right, so let's put
them somewhere else, so they'renot a distraction.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
Our other rule we had and this is because of Thomas,
this rule came about is that youhad to wear a shirt at the
table.
Yeah, Thomas was our MatthewMcConaughey of our family.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Hey, come look how good I look.
Yeah, bless his heart, he was agood-looking young kid.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
He's pretty, yeah, but he never had a shirt on, and
so I was like put your shirt on, bro, we're eating at the table
, and so it was just a— I meanso it wasn't like we were
overburdened.
He won't kill us when he hearsus say that but it was just a
fun kind of—.
Yeah, we didn't want it to be aplace where you're like oh God,
here we are Now.
There were times.
(15:38):
There were times when— it washey, I need to see you.
Like it was during the day, itwould be like if it wasn't
mealtime and you got called togo sit at the kitchen table.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Without your siblings .
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah.
It's like, hey, it's just usand you, let's go to the table.
We need to chat at the table.
It was like, oh no, crap'sabout to go down, and so it was
just a— and not to throw Thomasunder the bus again, but it was
mainly him.
Yeah, we spent a lot of timethere with him.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
It's just because it's great, because he went to
school to be pretty andsocialize.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
Well, all his teachers loved him and would
just help him along, and so Imean kids would do homework
around this table and I know youmay be sitting there thinking
why are you talking about atable?
Bro, that sounds great.
Yeah, like, that sounds like abeautiful thing.
That's awesome.
You don't know our lives,understand me.
I do know your life.
We do Like we had four wildlycrazy, very fun kids.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
One of the favorite things that we did and
established then when they werelittle guys that they literally
still ask to do today as grownadults, is we would do our highs
and lows of our day.
That day and that was a way,and I cannot even remember how
that even started- Probably youthat came up with the idea, just
(17:01):
a conversation starter.
It's always you, so it was justbasically a way starter it's
always you.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
So it was just basically a way for everybody,
because if you ask a kid how wasyour day?
Speaker 2 (17:10):
It was fine.
It was fine.
It was just a way to get themtalking in detail.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Yeah, and usually one would feed off the other one
yes.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
And then they would say ooh, ooh, can I go again?
I thought of another high, or Ithought of another low.
And it was just such a good wayto get conversation started.
And like I said, they literallystill do it today, even our
daughter-in-law.
When she's here for dinner andwe're just hanging around, she's
oh, do you want to do highs andlows?
Speaker 1 (17:34):
I'm like, yes, grown woman that married our son, we
do Well, another thing we didand you guys can I mean if
you're super spiritual and youwant to hack on us for this,
then have at it.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
Are you talking about thumbs up?
Yeah, I don't know how thatstarted?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
I don't either.
I think it was one of our kids,because they were not great,
they hated praying out loud, andso I was like, no, we're each
going to take a turn.
And I think it was probably oneof our kids came out with this
game and said all right, so whenyou put your thumbs on the
table, the last one to put theirthumbs on the table has to say
a prayer and your thumbs are up.
And you can do it veryinconspicuously.
You can just be very sly aboutit.
(18:12):
And sometimes it's like, oh, sofast, yeah, you have no idea,
but no one would sit down and noone would eat while we were
making plates.
No, we all made it for oneanother.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
But yeah, if we still do the thumbs up game,
literally still, we didn't do ittonight because we ate in
stages but, like last night,literally sitting there getting
ready for dinner.
Thumbs up on the table, ifyou're watching on video you can
see me doing it, but the lastone that put your thumbs up, or
(18:43):
the last one that doesn't do, itand it always most of the time
like lately it wound up being me, like it's been me.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
I was like I've really fallen off my game.
Early on I was pretty good.
Now I'm just I'm kind of.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
maybe I think you're distracted by the granddaughter.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Yeah, maybe my old age is kicking in, I don't know,
but anyway, so it's a fun kindof game that we played.
But the problem with that wasis our kids were like I don't,
callie was mortified of prayingin public.
Yes, mortified.
She's like.
I do not want to do that.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
We called her.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
And so we were.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
I did call her today to ask her.
We called to make sure this wasokay, that we talked directly
about her.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Yeah, because she was at my grandma.
We were at my mom's, hergrandmother's, and they spent
the night over there a good bit.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
But my grandma, or my mom, my mom, her grandma had a
painting on the wall there, sortof like the Hobby Lobby, like
live, laugh, love.
Yes, but it was a literal, itwas a prayer.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Yeah, and Callie memorized this prayer so she
would not have to say her ownwords.
And the first time she said itI was like, wait a minute, that
feels vaguely familiar.
Yeah, what is that?
Yeah, I was like did you comeup with that?
Yeah, I was really proud of her, and she did not tell us in the
beginning.
She ripped that off from apainting at Grandma's.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Until we were there.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Yeah, and we saw it one time we saw it.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
We're like Cali girl.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Would you like to read the prayer?
I didn't write it down, butit's basically Lord bless the—.
No, thank you for the foodbefore us.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Thank, you for the food before us, the friends
beside us and the love betweenus.
Yes, amen and we were like thatis so sweet.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
When she said it, I was like that is so sweet.
When she said it, I was likethat is beautiful.
Wow, I mean, it's one of thosethings where you're just like,
oh, my gosh, oh my gosh, you are13, and you just came up with
that Way to go.
Yeah, until we saw it on thepainting, we were like you.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Bit that liar.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
She's like I didn't lie, I just borrowed it, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
But then, even and when Miranda joined our family,
praying before a meal was notalways something that she was
accustomed to.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
She grew up Catholic and a little different.
It was just a little bitdifferent.
Yeah, and so she's like I don'tknow what to pray so sweetie
girl.
And I was like just talk andstill now Just talk, Just say
thank you.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Almost five years later, she'll still say her God
is great, god is good, and wejust go with it.
You know, it's okay, it's fun.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Yeah, yeah, it's just one of those things.
We're giving thanks, we'regiving thanks, we're at the
table and we have food to eat.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Yeah.
And so the whole point was forus to kind of build that culture
of together.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
And I think that's the underlying thing about it.
I think that we didn't realizewhat we were doing at the time,
but we were developing a culturewithin our family, within our
kids.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
And it was consistent whether it was what we used to
call two-kid week or four-kidweek.
It didn't matter how many kidswere home that week or that day
or whatever, because sometimesit would change.
But that was something thatthey could expect, kind of like
when we talked about theboundaries and expectations.
It's like that's just what wedo.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
And I'm not saying you have to be at your kitchen
table at your house.
Like we had cross country, wehad mountain bike, we had soccer
, like sometimes we didn't leavepractices till 7, 30, 8 o'clock
.
It was dark and we're eatingaround, but when we ate around a
table it didn't matter wherethat table was.
Culture was in our kids and inour family, not in our home.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
So it was like wherever we were, we're doing
the same thing.
Yeah, we knew which nights wecould go where, where kids would
eat free.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Right, yes.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And so if we were eating out, we would still.
The kids would even like puttheir phones under their leg or
ask mom, can I throw my phone inyour purse?
Speaker 1 (22:39):
Right.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
They would literally leave their phones in the car
because, I mean, that was justsomething that they knew, like
we're going to here to eatdinner.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Right.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
So if you're listening to us and you're
saying we're a baseball family,we're a, you know, travel ball
family and we don't get to eatat home at the table a whole lot
, Okay, that culture can bebuilt wherever you are.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Yeah, I would challenge you a little bit and I
know if you're listening outthere with a lot of kids you may
just get really.
You may get pissed at me rightnow I do think you do we wanted.
we knew the value of our cultureand our time and our lives and
knowing that I had these kidsfor maybe 17,.
(23:26):
Maybe 16 to 17 years when theyhit 18, you don't really have
them a whole lot.
They just live there and sleepthere.
But we have these kids for thisamount of time.
So that's when we went back.
I think we mentioned thisearlier in the episode.
We told our kids find one sportyou like and stick to that
sport.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Not because we were jerk parents.
No, I just—, but it's—.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
It's something we wanted to stand for as our
family to be like.
I want you to be active, I wantyou to have fun and I want you
to play on a team.
We're not going to do that overfour teams, because there's
value in us having time.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
Because our job as the parents is to fight for our
family Right and so that we canmodel what family looks like for
these kids that were watchingus do it.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
We always said our job as parents was to raise
responsible likeable kids whocontributed to society.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah, I added the likeable part in there, because
we can raise responsible jerks.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Right, and so we set some ground rules and you don't
have to.
We just did it for our family,because I want our kids to play
sports, but we weren't going todo a ton, but that was just one
of the things we did.
So if you're kids playing foursports, I mean have at it, but
they're going, just let meremind you, they're going to
leave you and they're going offto college and they're going to
(24:41):
go live their life and they'regoing to have fun.
You need to be able to have alife once they leave.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
Our whole thing is what have we taught them on what
family means when they go outin the world?
Right, because eventually thehope is they're going to build
their own and I want for them tohave the same fulfilling
although it's hard, but I wantthem to have the same fulfilling
experience that you and I havehad to be able to build this
(25:10):
crazy blended family.
I don't want it's not blendedcore or whatever, but I want
them to have the same fulfilling, loving, intentional family
environment that they grew up in.
I want them to have that intheir adult life.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
So what we're hoping is all those things that we kind
of not only just laid out forthem, but just kind of modeled
for them.
Yeah, we hope that that sinksin and becomes who they are,
that word modeling is huge yeah.
Just so you know your kids areminiature versions of you.
Yes, so just know that, yeah,the good, the bad, the ugly, all
(25:49):
of that, they are that of you,so keep that in mind.
Something, too, we did like notonly just the kitchen table,
but we're about sitting, hangingtogether, creating.
So when we bought this house,the thing we loved about this
house is, like this house has somuch potential for community
spaces, as we'll call them, justhangout spaces.
(26:09):
We kind of have two livingrooms, which is weird.
One doesn't get a whole lot ofattention, one gets just
bombarded.
It does.
We spend a lot of time in there.
But then we also have ourkitchen is designed to where
it's very open.
There's a big island with lotsof seats around it so you can
sit there.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
The front side of that.
A lot of people, like in thedecorating home design field,
might call it a quote unquotekeeping room, but we call it the
bourbon room.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
We call it the bourbon room, because my dream
one day is to have a room whereI just go with my buddies and we
just drink bourbon.
Yeah, but I don't have that now, so I have a nook.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
You have a nook.
You have a bourbon nook.
With a really cool couch thatcame from my grandmother and a
really cool bourbon barrel lidthat I got you for Father's Day
a few years ago Again, that wasBrother Jack Woodworking.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
Yeah, brother Jack, shout out to Brother Jack
Woodworking.
Yeah, brother Jack, shout outto Brother Jack Woodworking.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Go Wes.
Thank you, wes.
It says Bulldogs and Bourbon.
It has Ugga's face.
It's pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
Yeah, but yeah, you— Old barn door in there, like a
100-year-old barn door, yes, soit's just kind of a little—
Again, that's a little areawhere a lot yeah, and you have a
glass of wine.
I have sometimes a bourbon,sometimes not Glass of wine with
you and we just kind of talkabout the day and just kind of
(27:32):
chill.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
It's right there in the kitchen, but also is right
there attached to what used tobe a sunroom.
That's our dining area, whereour table is.
All of that that was veryintentional.
All of that that was veryintentional.
And then even I couldn't seethe potential for this home
where we live now as well as youand Callie could.
(27:53):
But the first place I fell inlove with is the patio off of
the dining room, because it isso cozy, and it so just draws
you to it to hang out there.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
Yeah, that's where our grills are, and we have
chairs and umbrellas and we sitout there.
We sit out there a lot ofafternoons too, now when the
weather's nice Especially now,yeah.
And then we have anothersitting area.
That's in our garage.
We put ceiling fans out there,fun little party like LED lights
around the top.
So we, during Saturdays, we'vegot a porch swing over there, we
do have a porch swing, so we'llgo sit out there.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
We don't have a porch , but we put it in the garage.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
In one side it's a double garage.
It's a big—it's a house builtin the 50s.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Or it's a carport.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
It's a carport, so it's not enclosed.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
That's neither here nor there.
The point is— it's a greathangout spot.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
Yeah, we Football on Saturdays.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Creating spaces to draw our family together has
always been big.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Right.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
And even when they were growing up it was always a
big deal to have them near us,because we keep saying over and
over again that thattogetherness, raising your
family, is relatively a shortspan of time.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
And there's this TikTok trend that I saw, that I
told you about and that actuallyour youngest daughter, Erin
Grace, she showed it to me.
There is a TikTok.
Maybe it's not a trend per se.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
It's a theory conversation.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
It's a conversation whatever, but she told me it was
the question would be posed ofare you a living room family or
are you a bedroom family?
And so the idea was the livingroom family is the family where
(29:45):
the kids feel comfortablehanging out in the living room
when they're little.
Are they comfortable playingwith their toys out there or I
mean, for our personal family itwas the boys even.
Are you comfortable likesitting in a cozy chair, wrapped
in a blanket, playing your GameBoy or your DS or whatever that
(30:08):
was?
Or like for Callie be wadded upin the corner of the couch
reading and like everybodywanted to be in the living room?
Or are you the kind of familythat all the kids retreat to
their bedroom and do their ownthing separately from one
another and the parents?
And so I didn't realize thatyou and I had created a living
(30:31):
room family.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
But the fact that our youngest recognized that and
then when I brought it up at thetable during dinner with the
other kids, they were like ohyeah, we are a living room
family.
We did life together in theliving room.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Well, we also didn't allow—none of our kids had TVs
in their bedrooms, absolutelynot.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
And we didn't have a TV in our bedroom.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
No, we didn't have one in our bedroom either, and
the reason why we do now isbecause it's gigantic for game
day.
Yeah, we use it for game day onSaturdays, but we literally
never turn it on.
It's not cute.
It's not cute on Saturdays, butwe literally never turn it on.
It's not cute, it's not cute,it's not pretty, but we don't
have anywhere to put it, so itjust sits in there and so it's a
.
But yeah, we just didn't, wedidn't put a TV in our room and
(31:16):
so we didn't do it with the kids, just because we just we didn't
want them to.
It's easy just to go there andjust turn on something and veg
out, and not.
So let's veg out together ifwe're going to do that.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I would literally rather veg out together, throw
pillows on the ground, blankets,whatever.
I want you with me.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Nowadays, if your kids and you're in your living
room, it's not just being aliving room family.
You even have to say, hey,today, right now, we're going to
put our phones down and we'regoing to together.
Because I can't tell you howmany times I was like, oh, we're
going to watch this movie, andI look, and every single person
is looking at their phone andnot the TV, and I was like and
you and I both are guilty ofthat.
(31:57):
Yeah, I was.
I was guilty with games and Ideleted all the games off my
phone.
You did.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
High five, thank you.
So it was just a—that's where Iwas—that was sucking up my time
and it was stupid.
I was like why am I playingCandy Crush or shooting deers or
whatever I'm doing, and nothanging out with my family?
I was like this is so stupid, Idon't even care about this, and
(32:30):
so even care about this, um,and so it's just okay.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Here's a question I know the answer to, but why are
you?
Speaker 1 (32:33):
asking so that our friends can hear us okay, go
ahead.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
would it have been easier to allow our kids to have
their electronics all the time?
Would it have been easier forus to?
Yeah, you can have a little TVin your room, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
A thousand percent.
Like we also didn't allow ourkids to have their phones in the
room after a certain time.
Now I get it Again.
I go back to if you're ablended family, like our kids
were like, hey, we need to talkto mom.
I was like, okay, cool, talk tomom.
Callie and Cody.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
And then charge your phones in the kitchen or charge
your phones somewhere else.
Thankfully, thomas and aarongrace understood that.
Yes, it was not, it was not an.
And well, they get to.
Why don't we like?
They understood even when theywere all little?
Speaker 1 (33:18):
yes, they understood, like, oh, of course they, if
they, if they want to talk totheir mama, they talk to their
mom but then after a certaintime we we had to take Cody's
and just say, bro, you have tostop, because he would literally
play games.
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Mr Sneaky.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
All night long.
Well, we took his phone andsomehow he wired or hacked.
He hacked his Nintendo orsomething.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
His super old DS.
I don't even know how he did it.
Speaker 1 (33:46):
Somehow rewired and got online and was watching
YouTube videos, watching somekind of video, and I was like
bro, I don't even know how hedid that and I don't even really
care, just give it to me.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
He had already tucked the little guys to bed in the
basement when we first all livedtogether, got married.
We had already tucked the boysinto bed and we were like, okay,
good night, whatever.
And.
And we were like, okay, goodnight, whatever.
And I told you I was like Ijust want to go check on the
boys.
And that was not anything Iever did.
I was like I just want to gocheck on them.
You're like why, I don't knowwhen I got down there, guess who
(34:15):
had, like you said, hacked fromhis DS into Wi-Fi to watch
YouTube on his black and whitelittle Nintendo DS That'd be
Cody Peck.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Yeah, I don't know how he, but it was just so.
We had to be very, very, veryspecific with him when it came
to rules because he would findthe loopholes and try to figure
out.
He said you said no phone, butyou didn't say anything about
this.
Like building a computer andyeah, whatever it may be.
So it's just a but.
All that to say.
We weren't trying to be like.
(34:48):
The idea was there's no needfor you to be on those things in
your room, there's no need foryou to have those things.
We have those out here.
We can do that.
And we weren't strict on whatthey could and couldn't watch in
the living room, because wewere together.
Yeah, most of the time the boyswere downstairs playing a video
game together, and Callie reallydidn't care, so Erin watched
(35:09):
whatever she wanted, and so itwas all those things to—I say
all those things to say thisLike find your anchor points at
your house.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
What are you intentional about?
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Yeah, what are your community spots, I guess, for
your home, like, think aboutyour culture.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
So let's unpack what that looks like.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
Okay, so let's okay.
Do we need like a little Forreal life?
Do we need like some kind ofnoise to say, now we're
unpacking.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
Welcome to the unpacking.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Unpacking with baggage claim Okay.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
So here's the question to our friends you
don't have to, I'm not askingyou, oh okay, but the question
is what kind of culture are youencouraging and modeling in your
family?
Speaker 1 (35:57):
Okay, so here's the problem with that question,
though, is you have to be honestwith yourself.
Yeah, you can answer thequestion, but you have to be
honest with—.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Because the modeling part for the parents is the
biggest part.
Right.
Speaker 1 (36:14):
You can have all the greatest goals and ambitions,
but unless you're—.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
You can encourage your head off.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Yeah, but unless you're actually doing them,
you're just talking.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
If you're not modeling what you're asking your
kids to do.
They see right through you.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Right, yeah, I agree 100%, and culture is one of
those things too.
Sometimes it's hard to explain,sometimes it's hard to put your
finger on, but you know it whenyou know it.
And your family, I will tellyou this, your family has a
culture, like it does.
The way you communicate, theway you fight, the way you love
(36:52):
on each other, all of thosethings are built around a
culture that you have in yourfamily.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
As I'm thumbing through the notebook.
As I'm thumbing through thenotebook, we're going to tackle
culture on a whole other podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Yeah, how to build how to just improvise and just
even come up with your culture,what you want it to look like.
Because here's the crazy partyou get to create that Like you
are creating that.
You get to pick what you'reintentional about, right, yeah,
you get to create that.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Like you are creating that.
You get to pick what you'reintentional about.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Right, yeah, you get to control that, like you are
not controlling but manage.
You get to set what that is.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
I know when we were talking about this you worried
about the word control.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Yeah, it's not, but like you get to, I guess I would
say you get to establish thatand set the precedence and then
see it out.
So it's not about controllingpeople, it's about allowing them
to catch the vision, the ideaand the passion behind what it
is you're after.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
So to kind of revert back to one of the very first
things that you were talkingabout is like an anchor point
for your family.
Like what kind of anchor pointsare you creating?
For us?
It was what kind of places doyou have where your family, your
kids, even our extended familyknows?
(38:10):
Like what kind of places areyou?
Do you just go to be together?
Speaker 1 (38:17):
It could be a fire pit outside.
It doesn't have to be in yourhouse, it could be outside your
house your patio.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Are you intentional about those places?
Does your family, yourimmediate family, like our
extended family, even knows wehave these places that we're
very intentional about?
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Gotcha.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
And, like you mentioned before, there's
specific places in our home andaround our home where we are
intentional about.
Those are the places we knowwe're going to be together.
Yeah, it sounds so simple, butit's not.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
And set those things out though, Like start modeling
that and doing it now.
It's not going to happen unlessyou take action and kind of
make it happen, Like set theprecedence.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
You have to be intentional and model it.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
Right, right.
So when we say the kitchentable, we call it table time,
which is awesome to us and it'shuge and it speaks volumes to us
that so much life changehappens around the table.
And I hope, as you unpack that,have those conversations with
your significant other aboutwhat kind of culture are we
(39:29):
setting?
Is it around our table or is itaround our TV?
Are we watching TV and eatingand not even talking?
Are we doing those and what dowe want to change?
So how do we change it?
So you got a question.
Are we at the question portion?
Speaker 2 (39:44):
here I have a question from the book okay the
book is a couple's journal, ayear of us, by alicia munoz, and
we've mentioned this bookbefore and great book.
We have got to reach out to her.
We have said a hundred timesthat we're going to reach out to
her because she has severalbooks that are about connecting.
Speaker 1 (40:04):
Let me tell you this Okay, on any of our socials, if
you will just log in on therefor the first five folks that
actually log in and share atable story, a story that's
happened at your table.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
I will buy you this book.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
And send it to you.
Yeah, I will to you First fivepeople will buy you the book and
I'll have it shipped to you.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
We have had the best time with this book.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
You've got to participate, so you've got to go
in there in the commentssection and share your story
about something fun thathappened at the table.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
Yeah, some intentional table time.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Awesome and this is great, but you'll love it.
Okay, go ahead.
Question.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Here's the question.
I've skipped around in the book.
We don't go in order.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
No, we don't.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
You can't tell me what to do, don't care, yes, and
as I put on my reading glassesbecause I can't see.
Okay, so here's the question.
You ready?
Babe?
Speaker 1 (40:56):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
What do you consider one of the most fascinating or
unusual things about me?
Most fascinating or what orunusual.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
Or unusual.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Unusual is not negative.
A lot of people think it is.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
No, I don't think of it.
I love unusual.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Unusual.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I actually think you have All right, the one, the
first thing that pops to mind.
I'm so excited, it's so fast.
You find the excitement and joyand sometimes I think, the most
mundane things I've ever seenin my life.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Don't talk about traveling.
We talked about that, no.
Speaker 1 (41:45):
I'm not, but it's just like, even if we're like,
hey, we're going to a newrestaurant or we're going to go
try out a new, we found this newwinery on TikTok or Instagram.
Yeah, you get so, yeah, see,you're doing it, you get so
excited about it and I'm likeokay, it's another winery, you
know what I'm saying.
But then it's like okay, it'sanother restaurant, but your
(42:08):
excitement is contagious andit's just kind of fun, like a
few nights ago I sent you thatlink on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
I was like I have to go here for my birthday this
year.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
It's like the garden, like the garden, the garden
room in Atlanta.
Yeah, the garden room, it's sofreaking beautiful.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
There are flowers and flowering trees everywhere
Inside a place.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
But it's not only see , it's not just the excitement
to go to that place, it's thatwhen we're there, oh my God,
yeah, you're like a kid who justwalked into a toy store.
Speaker 2 (42:38):
I'm a kid who just walked into a book fair.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Yeah, you get so, mom , I don't even talk about the
bookmobile, but you get soexcited about those things and
that's contagious.
And that's one of those thingsI just love about you, because
my side, the me, and I know thisabout myself.
I underplay everything and Idon't get excited about much.
I should.
Sometimes I do, sometimes Iget— I have to remind you to be
(43:01):
excited.
Yeah, I get excited aboutGeorgia football.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
Just that's a natural thing for me, well, but I I
have to remind you to be excitedabout normal things.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Yes, Thank you.
That sounds like such a jerk.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
No, no, no no, no, no , no, that came out wrong.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so so sorry, Don'tapologize, that's all good.
I have to remind you to beexcited about everyday things.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Right.
Celebrate the small victoriesand be excited about them.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
Okay, so enough on kicking me.
What is it?
Flip it.
Can we kick Greg?
Enough, let's do something good.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
No, and this may sound negative and it's not.
Speaker 1 (43:44):
The way— Okay, when you start it that way, it's
definitely negative, Like youdon't start with like— I just
hit the microphone.
Speaker 2 (43:50):
I am fascinated by the way that you—.
Oh Lord no the way you use yourADD to your advantage.
That's fascinating.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
What do you mean?
I don's fascinating.
What do you mean?
I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
What do I mean?
You can be thinking seventhoughts at the same time, but
give them equal attention.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (44:21):
And go down seven different paths of thought.
Well, I am not capable of that.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
It's actually incredibly exhausting, though
I'm sure it is, yeah, it's not.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
But from a type A personality over here I cannot
do that.
It's fascinating the way yourbrain works.
Now it's exhausting in aconversation.
Speaker 1 (44:44):
I know it's exhausting for you to live with
me and have to talk, just aconversation.
Speaker 2 (44:48):
I mean, even this evening, before I had to go back
to work for a family event, Iwas trying to share something
and you wanted to talk aboutwhat was in your brain.
I was like no, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
And you said okay.
And I was like no, no, no, no,wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
And you said okay.
And I was like in my head I waslike you're not listening to
what I'm about to say, but I do?
Speaker 1 (45:08):
I do listen, because a lot of times I lose those
thoughts Like if I don't saythem, sometimes because I'm
intrigued by what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (45:23):
I'll let go of that and latch onto what you're
talking about and I can't evenremember what I was talking
about.
But then on my receiving endI'm like you're not listening to
me because the seven otherthoughts are over there having
fireworks and it's a party.
But I need you to zone in onwhat I'm saying.
But it's fascinating that youcan do that, because I'm not
capable of that.
Speaker 1 (45:36):
Alright, yeah, it feels so encouraging, it is
encouraging.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
I'm fascinated by that because I can't do that.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
Well, yeah, I was telling Jess all the things.
Like we literally sat downtoday and I was like here's the
things I want to do with baggageclaim and I started laying out
like five different things,because I can't sleep at night
and I've got on this YouTubekick to where I'm watching lots
of YouTube videos at night and Iwas like I'm going to stop
doing that and watching lots ofYouTube videos and I was like
I'm going to stop doing that andI'm going to start being very
intentional about our plans forbaggage claim and what we're
(46:06):
going to do moving forward tohelp other couples.
Speaker 2 (46:09):
And he's laying out seven or eight, nine, ten things
where his thoughts are, and I'mlike— Jess is like what are we
going to talk about tonight?
Yeah, I'm like what are wetalking about today?
And today I have my littlenotebook here.
If you're watching us onYouTube.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
If you're not watching us, you're listening.
Speaker 2 (46:28):
But it's okay also if you're not watching and you're
listening.
But I have this beautifulleather-bound notebook where I
have our little outline.
That helps me.
I figured that out two or threeepisodes in that.
I need this, right, you don't.
Speaker 1 (46:48):
No, I go better without it, so here's our
takeaways.
Thank you for sitting with usthrough this tonight.
Yeah, thank you and thank youfor allowing us to share a huge
part of our lives.
The table in our home is veryspecial.
The table itself is not special.
(47:09):
The symbol of what it means is.
So I would say find somethingin your house that's special for
you and your family, and manlean in hard on that, like go
all in, lean in hard and rightnow, go all in lean in hard.
Speaker 2 (47:23):
And right now we've been sharing things that have
worked.
Have there been things thathave not worked for us?
Speaker 1 (47:28):
A thousand percent A million percent.
Speaker 2 (47:31):
We are not sharing this with all of you to say like
we are so perfect and this iswhat you should do.
Speaker 1 (47:38):
Lord, no, no.
So that's, if you havesomething that you think of,
that you go.
Hey, Jess, hey, Jess, Greg, ifyou thought of this, please,
please, please, reach out to usand just say what about this?
Speaker 2 (47:49):
Like we want you to interact with us.
If you're in a virus Texas, orif you're not, you know, Send us
a.
Speaker 1 (47:54):
DM, Send us a like, just reach out to us on any of
the socials.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
We're all there.
Or even how did you handle XYZ?
Speaker 1 (48:01):
Yeah, we would love to interact and help.
We want to give you stuff thatyou can use.
And again, this is not just tolisten to and go oh, that sounds
really cool, go put feet to itand practice it.
Speaker 2 (48:13):
I love you.
No, we want you to literallytry what we're talking about.
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Try it, kick holes in it, tell us what works, what
didn't work, and let us help you.
So thank you guys.
Please, if you find this stuffgood, please share it with other
folks Like it.
Thanks for all you guys.
We're continuing to grow.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Our reach continues to grow each week, which is
insane and crazy and fun.
It's crazy that people want tohear what we're talking about.
Speaker 1 (48:42):
Yeah, but thank you, guys, so I can't say it enough.
Thank you so much for listening.
Thank you for downloading andlistening to us while you drive.
We love you, guys and just knowour heart.
The reason we started this isto help you have a healthy,
strong marriage and to love yourspouse well.
Welcome to Baggage Claim everybody.
Thank you so much for droppingin to hang out with us for a
little bit.
No matter where you're at whatyou're doing sitting at your
desk, riding in your car, ormaybe even at your kitchen table
, wherever it is grab yourfavorite drink, whatever that is
, maybe whatever time of day itis, grab your favorite drink,
pull up to the table and join ustoday as we dive into a really
(00:25):
cool concept that has to doaround the table.
Before we get into that, though, we want to talk about
something that's, and I'm goingto try to be as best as I can
with this.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
We're going to be emotional.
Speaker 1 (00:37):
Yeah, life has seasons and we always say that
life is full of of hills andvalleys, mountaintops and
valleys.
Um, we weren't meant to live onmountaintops, because really
big mountains don't really haveanything growing on them.
No, all the really good growthhappens in the valleys, and
(00:57):
sometimes the valleys, we thinkof them as sad, but they're
actually where a lot of growthhappens.
Speaker 2 (01:03):
And some reflection.
Speaker 1 (01:04):
Yes, so we've had a season, a big chapter in for us
this week like a big, big turnthe page in the chapter we had
to say goodbye to Honey.
Speaker 2 (01:17):
Our teeny old lady stinky doggy yeah, she was our
tiny little thing.
Speaker 1 (01:21):
We had had her.
She'd been in our marriage for13 years.
Jess had had her two yearsprior.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (01:28):
And she was a rescue when we found her.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Yeah, when we found the—she was rescued from
literally a dumpster.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Yeah, she had bumps on her little ribs.
She had broken ribs yeah wherethey didn't heal properly.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
And when I rescued her and I named her, I just
picked her up and I'm going totry not to get too emotional,
but I just picked her up and shejust made eye contact and I
just said, hey, little honey,and then her name was just Honey
.
Took her to the vet and theywere like she's not a puppy, so
(02:00):
she's probably three or four.
So fast forward to this week,when we had to say goodbye to
her, the vet estimated her atalmost 19 years old.
Speaker 1 (02:11):
Yeah, so we can't say it was short.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
No, I mean she was pushing 126 in dog years she was
, but she was just the stinkiestlittle, sweet little she had no
teeth.
Speaker 1 (02:24):
No, she smelled bad.
You give her bad.
She smelled bad, she justcouldn't help it.
But we're riding back in theJeep back from that visit, from
saying goodbye yeah.
And I just told Jess.
I was like this is the end ofthe chapter and she goes.
Well, what do you mean?
And I was like, well, I hadLily when I was by myself and
(02:47):
she helped me through so much,like she was there for me
through, like I talked to her onthe way to work all the time.
I spent so much time with herwhen I didn't have the kids and
then when we got married, shejust became an integrated part
of our family.
Maybe one day I'll tell thestory about when she pooped on
your side of the bed when wewere moving in.
Speaker 2 (03:02):
It's a story from another day, yeah, just trying
to assert dominance.
Speaker 1 (03:06):
But anyway I lost Lily, like five years ago.
She became diabetic.
Speaker 2 (03:11):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (03:12):
And so it was just bad.
It just dropped off reallyquick and so we had to say
goodbye to her, which wastraumatic and really, really
hard for me.
It was horrible.
I still have her little tag inmy truck.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yeah, from her collar .
Speaker 1 (03:27):
Her name tag.
Yeah, I carry it with me justto kind of remember that.
And then coming home.
Speaker 2 (03:32):
But then you made that connection with Honey and
me.
Speaker 1 (03:35):
Yeah, she was there for you when you walked through
your trauma and your stuff.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
When I was by myself, she slept in the bed with me
and she was my girl.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Yeah, and so so.
I put her name tag on my keychain, and so we kind of said
goodbye to the things that webrought into, the things not
outside of our kids, right, butthe thing that we brought that
was very dear to us those twodoggy girls.
Yeah, Kind of helped us througha lot.
And so, man, that's a, I knowwe've all—and some of you may be
(04:05):
like it's just a dog.
It's not either.
Don't ever say that to me.
They walked through a lot withus and it was just kind of fun
for them to be there together.
And now we have two little boys, two—we still have two golden
doodles that are just—and we'lltalk about them some other time.
But anyway, tonight, you know,in that season we have these
(04:27):
things anchors in our lives andfor us, a huge, huge anchor for
our family and you may go like,okay, that's cheesy, but it's
just true is our kitchen table.
It wasn't that we were tryingto.
I mean, I don't want to say weweren't that super smart in what
(04:47):
we did.
Sometimes we just fell intoreally cool things that just
happened in our family.
Yeah, the reality was we livedin a house that had three
stories.
The two boys lived in thebasement, aaron was on the
middle floor and Callie was onthe top floor, and so Callie was
usually always when we were,yeah, always hanging out with us
.
The boys were in the basementbecause there was a pool table
(05:09):
down there in the theater room.
Yeah, their little game area,yeah, so they hung out.
And then Erin.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Grace kind of flitted between Heather and Yon in the
house just whatever washappening.
She was so little.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Yeah.
So our idea was we need someplace we can gather all these
hoodlums together and have someconversation.
So it's like where's that?
Speaker 2 (05:27):
we're like we reign this circus in yeah so we can
all be at the same place at thesame time, and we had two tables
, which was pretty interesting.
Speaker 1 (05:35):
we had a dining room but with your nice table in it
that we never sat at heirloom,yeah, and so we treasures.
We had this old table that Ihad gotten from my mom.
It was a hunting lodge.
It was from a hunting lodgethat they had bought.
They bought and sold realestate, so it was an old hunting
lodge table.
It looked rough, it was prettythough.
It was pretty it had good bones.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
It did have great bones.
That's what we all say.
Speaker 1 (06:01):
And so we took under.
We're like, hey, we're going todo a little fun project
together.
We're going to redo our kitchentable, and so we sanded it down
.
Speaker 2 (06:10):
But the boys said, okay, bye.
Speaker 1 (06:14):
Yeah, they didn't have a whole lot to do with it.
The girls were bought in.
Yeah, totally bought in.
Speaker 2 (06:17):
We're going to share the picture of I actually had it
printed on a canvas of Callieand Erin Grace under their table
just sanding their littleselves to pieces, sanding and
painting and I took a knife andjust carved a P into the leg.
Because we were combining Peckand Petillo.
Yes, it was Peck and Petillo.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
So the P kind of worked.
We didn't have to do a P inanother letter, which we would
have if we needed to.
So I said that was one reasonyou married, because I had the
same last name.
I was just about to say thatyou didn't have to change it
into the monogram.
I didn't have to change mymonogram, right?
No?
So it was one of those things.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
I'm a Southern girl.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
That was one of those things we had to have a hard
discussion about wasmonogramming, and maybe we'll
get into that one day.
But we carved a P in there andthen we just painted it and we,
to this day, still have thattable.
It's been expanded and it'sgrown a little bit and then
we've resurfaced the top of itwith some different wood, but we
still have the table.
But that was our first project.
(07:18):
Now at that table, man it was,we didn't just have meals there,
it's kind of like life happenedthere.
Yeah, and that's the reason,honestly, at this podcast, we
have a table.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
If you're watching this on video.
If you're not watching on video, it was really important to
Greg and I to be able to sitdown at a table because, like he
was saying, that's where lifehas happened for our family.
Obviously, life happenseverywhere for our family, but
that was a big anchor point forus.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
Well, for me, I think there's so much life.
Change happens and growth canhappen at a table, whether it be
your kitchen table, a dinnertable of a friend or a family
member being out somewhere, evenat a dinner table.
Speaker 2 (08:09):
It's where you sit around.
I need to talk to you aboutsomething.
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Right.
Speaker 2 (08:12):
It's at a table.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Yeah, it's usually sitting at a table somewhere, so
it's always like gatheredaround.
It's an easy point and there'salways some distance between you
, so you feel comfortable tokind of be who you are.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
Sometimes it may sound silly too, but even in my
classroom I teach first grade.
I don't have a desk that I sitat.
I sit at a table.
Speaker 1 (08:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
So when I meet, even with my littles, I'm like come
sit at my table with me.
Speaker 1 (08:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
So to invite somebody to your table, no matter where
it's at, is a little bit morecomforting, I think.
Speaker 1 (08:43):
Yeah, to break bread, have a drink with, just to kind
of share life with.
So our kitchen table and wecall it our kitchen table only
because it's set in our kitchensomewhat kind of kitchen
sunroom-ish it's kind of beenyeah, it's always been somewhat
close to the kitchen.
Speaker 2 (09:04):
And I say a couple of our houses.
We've only we've lived in threehomes together, right and the
first two homes.
Speaker 1 (09:12):
There was the kitchen table and then there was a
formal dining room, right tableand the only time we ate there
is when we had a party we hadfamily over and that was the
excess table.
Speaker 2 (09:21):
Yes, like thanksgiving or something else,
but but in our current home thatwe lived in for five years, we
intentionally chose not to havea formal dining room situation.
This big, giant table in whatused to be a sunroom that we've
turned into our— it's not even adining room.
Like there are no walls in ourhome.
Speaker 1 (09:44):
There are walls in our home.
Speaker 2 (09:48):
But like okay, let me rephrase that it's very open.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
It is very open.
Speaker 2 (09:52):
yes, In the main living kitchen, dining, hanging
out area.
It's all one big place.
Intentionally to draw you tothat table.
Speaker 1 (10:03):
Right, and I know if you listen to us or you followed
us.
We talked about our behaviorchart and our boundaries chart,
where we did that.
I don't know if we ever postedthat picture of the boundaries.
Speaker 2 (10:14):
I don't think we did.
I did find it.
I was so happy, okay, so wefound that.
Speaker 1 (10:17):
We're going to post that picture so you can actually
see it doesn't have the kids'signatures on it, it has the raw
version before they signed it.
We'll post that up so you guyscan check it out.
But we did that at our table.
We came up with core values forour family.
We're going to do an episodeabout that but we did those at
(10:39):
our kitchen table.
Our kitchen table was not justa place to sit down and eat.
When I say anchor point, it wasa central point where we got to
come together and talk aboutsometimes hard issues, sometimes
fun issues, sometimes just noteven hard, but just heart issues
, like if one of our kids wasstruggling, that so-and-so was
made fun of, or this, thishappened.
(11:00):
It was a heart to heart kind ofplace and it just they happened
.
It was a heart-to-heart kind ofplace and it just they
associated that table withconversation and it's just, and
when I look back at it I'm likeGod, how did we get that right?
Speaker 2 (11:13):
I don't know, but even as adults they still do.
They still know.
I mean, our oldest and herhusband, callie, and her husband
Charles live out of state inFlorida and Cody lives 45
minutes away but he's stillnearby.
But when we all come togetherthere really is no question of
(11:35):
where a meal or lots of gamesand togetherness happens.
And it's been fun because asour family grows, as our
children get married and now wehave grand girl Lucy she's not
sitting in a chair yet, her highchair's there, but I mean I get
to unfold a folding table andput a tablecloth on it and so
(11:59):
our table keeps extending.
Speaker 1 (12:01):
Right.
Speaker 2 (12:01):
And so, and I love when we get to have family at
the house, because you got metwo folding tables and I have
tablecloths that make it allseem like one whole big table.
Speaker 1 (12:11):
But one day we're going to have a really big table
.
Speaker 2 (12:13):
I know it's going to be so cool.
Yeah, I mean well, I mean ourtables.
Seat to eight now, so you canimagine when we have enough
folks over here to have to havea folding table.
It just fills us with so muchjoy to have that many people at
a table together.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Yeah, because we look back at when they were little
and we're just trying to wrangleeveryone together.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
We were, but, and then there was a lot of times
when we were trying to figureout how to be a family of six
and eating at home was anecessity because, yeah, I don't
know, and some of you may beout there in blended families
and you just be rolling in cash.
Speaker 1 (12:47):
We didn't have that experience.
That's not us Way to go.
You.
Speaker 2 (12:50):
Yeah, high five.
Speaker 1 (12:51):
We were like, okay, how do we feed all these kids
and not go broke and pay the?
Speaker 2 (12:56):
power bill.
So eating at home at the tablefrom the parent end of it was
like we have to.
Speaker 1 (13:04):
And it became a thing of cooking in the kitchen with
the girls.
The girls really liked thekitchen and so it was a fun
family thing for us and justkind of pushed us more toward
that.
And then we had but we did havesome boundaries to our table-
we did.
Like there were some things wedidn't do at the table and some
things that you Number one rule,the number one rule was't do at
the table, and some things thatyou— Number one rule, the
(13:26):
number one rule was no phones atthe table.
Speaker 2 (13:28):
No electronics at the table.
Yeah, okay, yeah, not hisphones.
Speaker 1 (13:31):
Yeah, I was about to say, you had to say electronics.
For Cody.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Yeah, Cody.
Speaker 1 (13:36):
Bless his heart.
He's our gamer.
He's always been a gamer.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
Yeah, I was going to say the same thing.
He had like his DS or his GameBoy or whatever the case may be.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
He's the kid who would say hey, dad, can you drop
me off at the school Saturdayfor four hours.
I was like to do what?
Well, I'm in this fun team likea club.
It's a club and he goes.
So we spend half the time twohours trying to hack this other
team and this other club triesto defend us, and then in the
second half they try to hack usand we try to defend them, and I
(14:08):
was like four hours on aSaturday morning and he's like
yes, yeah, he was so good and sothat's how he would spend a lot
of his Saturdays sometimes, sowe had to say the word
electronics, because Cody wouldbe the one to figure out,
looking for the loopholes,loopholes.
Speaker 2 (14:27):
Looking be the one looking for the loopholes.
Yeah, so that was our numberone, number one rule.
Yeah, our sweetie girls, theyjust went with it.
Thomas was just happy to bethere so he went with it.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
So cody was the only one that kind of pushed that
yeah, and I know if you have ablended family, you have kids
who have other parents and itwasn't like hey, we're taking
your phone away.
It's like for this 45 minutesto an hour that we sit here.
Your phone sits on the islandor sits somewhere else.
It doesn't sit on the table.
We don't stack them on themiddle of the table because they
(14:52):
buzz and then attention's gone.
Speaker 2 (14:56):
That defeats the purpose, right, so let's put
them somewhere else, so they'renot a distraction.
Speaker 1 (15:02):
Our other rule we had and this is because of Thomas,
this rule came about is that youhad to wear a shirt at the
table.
Yeah, Thomas was our MatthewMcConaughey of our family.
Speaker 2 (15:13):
Hey, come look how good I look.
Yeah, bless his heart, he was agood-looking young kid.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
He's pretty, yeah, but he never had a shirt on, and
so I was like put your shirt on, bro, we're eating at the table
, and so it was just a— I meanso it wasn't like we were
overburdened.
He won't kill us when he hearsus say that but it was just a
fun kind of—.
Yeah, we didn't want it to be aplace where you're like oh God,
here we are Now.
There were times.
(15:38):
There were times when— it washey, I need to see you.
Like it was during the day, itwould be like if it wasn't
mealtime and you got called togo sit at the kitchen table.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Without your siblings .
Speaker 1 (15:50):
Yeah.
It's like, hey, it's just usand you, let's go to the table.
We need to chat at the table.
It was like, oh no, crap'sabout to go down, and so it was
just a— and not to throw Thomasunder the bus again, but it was
mainly him.
Yeah, we spent a lot of timethere with him.
Speaker 2 (16:04):
It's just because it's great, because he went to
school to be pretty andsocialize.
Speaker 1 (16:09):
Well, all his teachers loved him and would
just help him along, and so Imean kids would do homework
around this table and I know youmay be sitting there thinking
why are you talking about atable?
Bro, that sounds great.
Yeah, like, that sounds like abeautiful thing.
That's awesome.
You don't know our lives,understand me.
I do know your life.
We do Like we had four wildlycrazy, very fun kids.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
One of the favorite things that we did and
established then when they werelittle guys that they literally
still ask to do today as grownadults, is we would do our highs
and lows of our day.
That day and that was a way,and I cannot even remember how
that even started- Probably youthat came up with the idea, just
(17:01):
a conversation starter.
It's always you, so it was justbasically a way starter it's
always you.
Speaker 1 (17:05):
So it was just basically a way for everybody,
because if you ask a kid how wasyour day?
Speaker 2 (17:10):
It was fine.
It was fine.
It was just a way to get themtalking in detail.
Speaker 1 (17:14):
Yeah, and usually one would feed off the other one
yes.
Speaker 2 (17:17):
And then they would say ooh, ooh, can I go again?
I thought of another high, or Ithought of another low.
And it was just such a good wayto get conversation started.
And like I said, they literallystill do it today, even our
daughter-in-law.
When she's here for dinner andwe're just hanging around, she's
oh, do you want to do highs andlows?
Speaker 1 (17:34):
I'm like, yes, grown woman that married our son, we
do Well, another thing we didand you guys can I mean if
you're super spiritual and youwant to hack on us for this,
then have at it.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
Are you talking about thumbs up?
Yeah, I don't know how thatstarted?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
I don't either.
I think it was one of our kids,because they were not great,
they hated praying out loud, andso I was like, no, we're each
going to take a turn.
And I think it was probably oneof our kids came out with this
game and said all right, so whenyou put your thumbs on the
table, the last one to put theirthumbs on the table has to say
a prayer and your thumbs are up.
And you can do it veryinconspicuously.
You can just be very sly aboutit.
(18:12):
And sometimes it's like, oh, sofast, yeah, you have no idea,
but no one would sit down and noone would eat while we were
making plates.
No, we all made it for oneanother.
Speaker 2 (18:23):
But yeah, if we still do the thumbs up game,
literally still, we didn't do ittonight because we ate in
stages but, like last night,literally sitting there getting
ready for dinner.
Thumbs up on the table, ifyou're watching on video you can
see me doing it, but the lastone that put your thumbs up, or
(18:43):
the last one that doesn't do, itand it always most of the time
like lately it wound up being me, like it's been me.
Speaker 1 (18:50):
I was like I've really fallen off my game.
Early on I was pretty good.
Now I'm just I'm kind of.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
maybe I think you're distracted by the granddaughter.
Speaker 1 (18:58):
Yeah, maybe my old age is kicking in, I don't know,
but anyway, so it's a fun kindof game that we played.
But the problem with that wasis our kids were like I don't,
callie was mortified of prayingin public.
Yes, mortified.
She's like.
I do not want to do that.
Speaker 2 (19:14):
We called her.
Speaker 1 (19:16):
And so we were.
Speaker 2 (19:18):
I did call her today to ask her.
We called to make sure this wasokay, that we talked directly
about her.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
Yeah, because she was at my grandma.
We were at my mom's, hergrandmother's, and they spent
the night over there a good bit.
Speaker 2 (19:27):
But my grandma, or my mom, my mom, her grandma had a
painting on the wall there, sortof like the Hobby Lobby, like
live, laugh, love.
Yes, but it was a literal, itwas a prayer.
Speaker 1 (19:47):
Yeah, and Callie memorized this prayer so she
would not have to say her ownwords.
And the first time she said itI was like, wait a minute, that
feels vaguely familiar.
Yeah, what is that?
Yeah, I was like did you comeup with that?
Yeah, I was really proud of her, and she did not tell us in the
beginning.
She ripped that off from apainting at Grandma's.
Speaker 2 (20:03):
Until we were there.
Speaker 1 (20:04):
Yeah, and we saw it one time we saw it.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
We're like Cali girl.
Speaker 1 (20:08):
Would you like to read the prayer?
I didn't write it down, butit's basically Lord bless the—.
No, thank you for the foodbefore us.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Thank, you for the food before us, the friends
beside us and the love betweenus.
Yes, amen and we were like thatis so sweet.
Speaker 1 (20:24):
When she said it, I was like that is so sweet.
When she said it, I was likethat is beautiful.
Wow, I mean, it's one of thosethings where you're just like,
oh, my gosh, oh my gosh, you are13, and you just came up with
that Way to go.
Yeah, until we saw it on thepainting, we were like you.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
Bit that liar.
Speaker 1 (20:38):
She's like I didn't lie, I just borrowed it, yeah.
Speaker 2 (20:41):
But then, even and when Miranda joined our family,
praying before a meal was notalways something that she was
accustomed to.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
She grew up Catholic and a little different.
It was just a little bitdifferent.
Yeah, and so she's like I don'tknow what to pray so sweetie
girl.
And I was like just talk andstill now Just talk, Just say
thank you.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Almost five years later, she'll still say her God
is great, god is good, and wejust go with it.
You know, it's okay, it's fun.
Speaker 1 (21:07):
Yeah, yeah, it's just one of those things.
We're giving thanks, we'regiving thanks, we're at the
table and we have food to eat.
Speaker 2 (21:13):
Yeah.
And so the whole point was forus to kind of build that culture
of together.
Speaker 1 (21:23):
And I think that's the underlying thing about it.
I think that we didn't realizewhat we were doing at the time,
but we were developing a culturewithin our family, within our
kids.
Speaker 2 (21:35):
And it was consistent whether it was what we used to
call two-kid week or four-kidweek.
It didn't matter how many kidswere home that week or that day
or whatever, because sometimesit would change.
But that was something thatthey could expect, kind of like
when we talked about theboundaries and expectations.
It's like that's just what wedo.
Speaker 1 (21:56):
And I'm not saying you have to be at your kitchen
table at your house.
Like we had cross country, wehad mountain bike, we had soccer
, like sometimes we didn't leavepractices till 7, 30, 8 o'clock
.
It was dark and we're eatingaround, but when we ate around a
table it didn't matter wherethat table was.
Culture was in our kids and inour family, not in our home.
Speaker 2 (22:20):
So it was like wherever we were, we're doing
the same thing.
Yeah, we knew which nights wecould go where, where kids would
eat free.
Speaker 1 (22:28):
Right, yes.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And so if we were eating out, we would still.
The kids would even like puttheir phones under their leg or
ask mom, can I throw my phone inyour purse?
Speaker 1 (22:39):
Right.
Speaker 2 (22:40):
They would literally leave their phones in the car
because, I mean, that was justsomething that they knew, like
we're going to here to eatdinner.
Speaker 1 (22:48):
Right.
Speaker 2 (22:48):
So if you're listening to us and you're
saying we're a baseball family,we're a, you know, travel ball
family and we don't get to eatat home at the table a whole lot
, Okay, that culture can bebuilt wherever you are.
Speaker 1 (23:04):
Yeah, I would challenge you a little bit and I
know if you're listening outthere with a lot of kids you may
just get really.
You may get pissed at me rightnow I do think you do we wanted.
we knew the value of our cultureand our time and our lives and
knowing that I had these kidsfor maybe 17,.
(23:26):
Maybe 16 to 17 years when theyhit 18, you don't really have
them a whole lot.
They just live there and sleepthere.
But we have these kids for thisamount of time.
So that's when we went back.
I think we mentioned thisearlier in the episode.
We told our kids find one sportyou like and stick to that
sport.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Not because we were jerk parents.
No, I just—, but it's—.
Speaker 1 (23:47):
It's something we wanted to stand for as our
family to be like.
I want you to be active, I wantyou to have fun and I want you
to play on a team.
We're not going to do that overfour teams, because there's
value in us having time.
Speaker 2 (23:57):
Because our job as the parents is to fight for our
family Right and so that we canmodel what family looks like for
these kids that were watchingus do it.
Speaker 1 (24:06):
We always said our job as parents was to raise
responsible likeable kids whocontributed to society.
Speaker 2 (24:15):
Yeah, I added the likeable part in there, because
we can raise responsible jerks.
Speaker 1 (24:19):
Right, and so we set some ground rules and you don't
have to.
We just did it for our family,because I want our kids to play
sports, but we weren't going todo a ton, but that was just one
of the things we did.
So if you're kids playing foursports, I mean have at it, but
they're going, just let meremind you, they're going to
leave you and they're going offto college and they're going to
(24:41):
go live their life and they'regoing to have fun.
You need to be able to have alife once they leave.
Speaker 2 (24:46):
Our whole thing is what have we taught them on what
family means when they go outin the world?
Right, because eventually thehope is they're going to build
their own and I want for them tohave the same fulfilling
although it's hard, but I wantthem to have the same fulfilling
experience that you and I havehad to be able to build this
(25:10):
crazy blended family.
I don't want it's not blendedcore or whatever, but I want
them to have the same fulfilling, loving, intentional family
environment that they grew up in.
I want them to have that intheir adult life.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
So what we're hoping is all those things that we kind
of not only just laid out forthem, but just kind of modeled
for them.
Yeah, we hope that that sinksin and becomes who they are,
that word modeling is huge yeah.
Just so you know your kids areminiature versions of you.
Yes, so just know that, yeah,the good, the bad, the ugly, all
(25:49):
of that, they are that of you,so keep that in mind.
Something, too, we did like notonly just the kitchen table,
but we're about sitting, hangingtogether, creating.
So when we bought this house,the thing we loved about this
house is, like this house has somuch potential for community
spaces, as we'll call them, justhangout spaces.
(26:09):
We kind of have two livingrooms, which is weird.
One doesn't get a whole lot ofattention, one gets just
bombarded.
It does.
We spend a lot of time in there.
But then we also have ourkitchen is designed to where
it's very open.
There's a big island with lotsof seats around it so you can
sit there.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
The front side of that.
A lot of people, like in thedecorating home design field,
might call it a quote unquotekeeping room, but we call it the
bourbon room.
Speaker 1 (26:41):
We call it the bourbon room, because my dream
one day is to have a room whereI just go with my buddies and we
just drink bourbon.
Yeah, but I don't have that now, so I have a nook.
Speaker 2 (26:52):
You have a nook.
You have a bourbon nook.
With a really cool couch thatcame from my grandmother and a
really cool bourbon barrel lidthat I got you for Father's Day
a few years ago Again, that wasBrother Jack Woodworking.
Speaker 1 (27:03):
Yeah, brother Jack, shout out to Brother Jack
Woodworking.
Yeah, brother Jack, shout outto Brother Jack Woodworking.
Speaker 2 (27:07):
Go Wes.
Thank you, wes.
It says Bulldogs and Bourbon.
It has Ugga's face.
It's pretty cool.
Speaker 1 (27:12):
Yeah, but yeah, you— Old barn door in there, like a
100-year-old barn door, yes, soit's just kind of a little—
Again, that's a little areawhere a lot yeah, and you have a
glass of wine.
I have sometimes a bourbon,sometimes not Glass of wine with
you and we just kind of talkabout the day and just kind of
(27:32):
chill.
Speaker 2 (27:32):
It's right there in the kitchen, but also is right
there attached to what used tobe a sunroom.
That's our dining area, whereour table is.
All of that that was veryintentional.
All of that that was veryintentional.
And then even I couldn't seethe potential for this home
where we live now as well as youand Callie could.
(27:53):
But the first place I fell inlove with is the patio off of
the dining room, because it isso cozy, and it so just draws
you to it to hang out there.
Speaker 1 (28:04):
Yeah, that's where our grills are, and we have
chairs and umbrellas and we sitout there.
We sit out there a lot ofafternoons too, now when the
weather's nice Especially now,yeah.
And then we have anothersitting area.
That's in our garage.
We put ceiling fans out there,fun little party like LED lights
around the top.
So we, during Saturdays, we'vegot a porch swing over there, we
do have a porch swing, so we'llgo sit out there.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
We don't have a porch , but we put it in the garage.
Speaker 1 (28:27):
In one side it's a double garage.
It's a big—it's a house builtin the 50s.
Speaker 2 (28:31):
Or it's a carport.
Speaker 1 (28:32):
It's a carport, so it's not enclosed.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
That's neither here nor there.
The point is— it's a greathangout spot.
Speaker 1 (28:42):
Yeah, we Football on Saturdays.
Speaker 2 (28:44):
Creating spaces to draw our family together has
always been big.
Speaker 1 (28:50):
Right.
Speaker 2 (28:51):
And even when they were growing up it was always a
big deal to have them near us,because we keep saying over and
over again that thattogetherness, raising your
family, is relatively a shortspan of time.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (29:07):
And there's this TikTok trend that I saw, that I
told you about and that actuallyour youngest daughter, Erin
Grace, she showed it to me.
There is a TikTok.
Maybe it's not a trend per se.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
It's a theory conversation.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
It's a conversation whatever, but she told me it was
the question would be posed ofare you a living room family or
are you a bedroom family?
And so the idea was the livingroom family is the family where
(29:45):
the kids feel comfortablehanging out in the living room
when they're little.
Are they comfortable playingwith their toys out there or I
mean, for our personal family itwas the boys even.
Are you comfortable likesitting in a cozy chair, wrapped
in a blanket, playing your GameBoy or your DS or whatever that
(30:08):
was?
Or like for Callie be wadded upin the corner of the couch
reading and like everybodywanted to be in the living room?
Or are you the kind of familythat all the kids retreat to
their bedroom and do their ownthing separately from one
another and the parents?
And so I didn't realize thatyou and I had created a living
(30:31):
room family.
Speaker 1 (30:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (30:34):
But the fact that our youngest recognized that and
then when I brought it up at thetable during dinner with the
other kids, they were like ohyeah, we are a living room
family.
We did life together in theliving room.
Speaker 1 (30:48):
Well, we also didn't allow—none of our kids had TVs
in their bedrooms, absolutelynot.
Speaker 2 (30:53):
And we didn't have a TV in our bedroom.
Speaker 1 (30:54):
No, we didn't have one in our bedroom either, and
the reason why we do now isbecause it's gigantic for game
day.
Yeah, we use it for game day onSaturdays, but we literally
never turn it on.
It's not cute.
It's not cute on Saturdays, butwe literally never turn it on.
It's not cute, it's not cute,it's not pretty, but we don't
have anywhere to put it, so itjust sits in there and so it's a
.
But yeah, we just didn't, wedidn't put a TV in our room and
(31:16):
so we didn't do it with the kids, just because we just we didn't
want them to.
It's easy just to go there andjust turn on something and veg
out, and not.
So let's veg out together ifwe're going to do that.
Speaker 2 (31:27):
I would literally rather veg out together, throw
pillows on the ground, blankets,whatever.
I want you with me.
Speaker 1 (31:36):
Nowadays, if your kids and you're in your living
room, it's not just being aliving room family.
You even have to say, hey,today, right now, we're going to
put our phones down and we'regoing to together.
Because I can't tell you howmany times I was like, oh, we're
going to watch this movie, andI look, and every single person
is looking at their phone andnot the TV, and I was like and
you and I both are guilty ofthat.
(31:57):
Yeah, I was.
I was guilty with games and Ideleted all the games off my
phone.
You did.
Speaker 2 (32:01):
I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
High five, thank you.
So it was just a—that's where Iwas—that was sucking up my time
and it was stupid.
I was like why am I playingCandy Crush or shooting deers or
whatever I'm doing, and nothanging out with my family?
I was like this is so stupid, Idon't even care about this, and
(32:30):
so even care about this, um,and so it's just okay.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
Here's a question I know the answer to, but why are
you?
Speaker 1 (32:33):
asking so that our friends can hear us okay, go
ahead.
Speaker 2 (32:35):
would it have been easier to allow our kids to have
their electronics all the time?
Would it have been easier forus to?
Yeah, you can have a little TVin your room, I don't care.
Speaker 1 (32:49):
A thousand percent.
Like we also didn't allow ourkids to have their phones in the
room after a certain time.
Now I get it Again.
I go back to if you're ablended family, like our kids
were like, hey, we need to talkto mom.
I was like, okay, cool, talk tomom.
Callie and Cody.
Speaker 2 (33:14):
And then charge your phones in the kitchen or charge
your phones somewhere else.
Thankfully, thomas and aarongrace understood that.
Yes, it was not, it was not an.
And well, they get to.
Why don't we like?
They understood even when theywere all little?
Speaker 1 (33:18):
yes, they understood, like, oh, of course they, if
they, if they want to talk totheir mama, they talk to their
mom but then after a certaintime we we had to take Cody's
and just say, bro, you have tostop, because he would literally
play games.
Speaker 2 (33:30):
Mr Sneaky.
Speaker 1 (33:31):
All night long.
Well, we took his phone andsomehow he wired or hacked.
He hacked his Nintendo orsomething.
Speaker 2 (33:42):
His super old DS.
I don't even know how he did it.
Speaker 1 (33:46):
Somehow rewired and got online and was watching
YouTube videos, watching somekind of video, and I was like
bro, I don't even know how hedid that and I don't even really
care, just give it to me.
Speaker 2 (33:55):
He had already tucked the little guys to bed in the
basement when we first all livedtogether, got married.
We had already tucked the boysinto bed and we were like, okay,
good night, whatever.
And.
And we were like, okay, goodnight, whatever.
And I told you I was like Ijust want to go check on the
boys.
And that was not anything Iever did.
I was like I just want to gocheck on them.
You're like why, I don't knowwhen I got down there, guess who
(34:15):
had, like you said, hacked fromhis DS into Wi-Fi to watch
YouTube on his black and whitelittle Nintendo DS That'd be
Cody Peck.
Speaker 1 (34:27):
Yeah, I don't know how he, but it was just so.
We had to be very, very, veryspecific with him when it came
to rules because he would findthe loopholes and try to figure
out.
He said you said no phone, butyou didn't say anything about
this.
Like building a computer andyeah, whatever it may be.
So it's just a but.
All that to say.
We weren't trying to be like.
(34:48):
The idea was there's no needfor you to be on those things in
your room, there's no need foryou to have those things.
We have those out here.
We can do that.
And we weren't strict on whatthey could and couldn't watch in
the living room, because wewere together.
Yeah, most of the time the boyswere downstairs playing a video
game together, and Callie reallydidn't care, so Erin watched
(35:09):
whatever she wanted, and so itwas all those things to—I say
all those things to say thisLike find your anchor points at
your house.
Speaker 2 (35:21):
What are you intentional about?
Speaker 1 (35:23):
Yeah, what are your community spots, I guess, for
your home, like, think aboutyour culture.
Speaker 2 (35:29):
So let's unpack what that looks like.
Speaker 1 (35:31):
Okay, so let's okay.
Do we need like a little Forreal life?
Do we need like some kind ofnoise to say, now we're
unpacking.
Speaker 2 (35:38):
Welcome to the unpacking.
Speaker 1 (35:39):
Unpacking with baggage claim Okay.
Speaker 2 (35:42):
So here's the question to our friends you
don't have to, I'm not askingyou, oh okay, but the question
is what kind of culture are youencouraging and modeling in your
family?
Speaker 1 (35:57):
Okay, so here's the problem with that question,
though, is you have to be honestwith yourself.
Yeah, you can answer thequestion, but you have to be
honest with—.
Speaker 2 (36:10):
Because the modeling part for the parents is the
biggest part.
Right.
Speaker 1 (36:14):
You can have all the greatest goals and ambitions,
but unless you're—.
Speaker 2 (36:18):
You can encourage your head off.
Speaker 1 (36:19):
Yeah, but unless you're actually doing them,
you're just talking.
Speaker 2 (36:23):
If you're not modeling what you're asking your
kids to do.
They see right through you.
Speaker 1 (36:28):
Right, yeah, I agree 100%, and culture is one of
those things too.
Sometimes it's hard to explain,sometimes it's hard to put your
finger on, but you know it whenyou know it.
And your family, I will tellyou this, your family has a
culture, like it does.
The way you communicate, theway you fight, the way you love
(36:52):
on each other, all of thosethings are built around a
culture that you have in yourfamily.
Speaker 2 (36:58):
As I'm thumbing through the notebook.
As I'm thumbing through thenotebook, we're going to tackle
culture on a whole other podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:08):
Yeah, how to build how to just improvise and just
even come up with your culture,what you want it to look like.
Because here's the crazy partyou get to create that Like you
are creating that.
You get to pick what you'reintentional about, right, yeah,
you get to create that.
Speaker 2 (37:19):
Like you are creating that.
You get to pick what you'reintentional about.
Speaker 1 (37:22):
Right, yeah, you get to control that, like you are
not controlling but manage.
You get to set what that is.
Speaker 2 (37:28):
I know when we were talking about this you worried
about the word control.
Speaker 1 (37:31):
Yeah, it's not, but like you get to, I guess I would
say you get to establish thatand set the precedence and then
see it out.
So it's not about controllingpeople, it's about allowing them
to catch the vision, the ideaand the passion behind what it
is you're after.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
So to kind of revert back to one of the very first
things that you were talkingabout is like an anchor point
for your family.
Like what kind of anchor pointsare you creating?
For us?
It was what kind of places doyou have where your family, your
kids, even our extended familyknows?
(38:10):
Like what kind of places areyou?
Do you just go to be together?
Speaker 1 (38:17):
It could be a fire pit outside.
It doesn't have to be in yourhouse, it could be outside your
house your patio.
Speaker 2 (38:23):
Are you intentional about those places?
Does your family, yourimmediate family, like our
extended family, even knows wehave these places that we're
very intentional about?
Speaker 1 (38:36):
Gotcha.
Speaker 2 (38:37):
And, like you mentioned before, there's
specific places in our home andaround our home where we are
intentional about.
Those are the places we knowwe're going to be together.
Yeah, it sounds so simple, butit's not.
Speaker 1 (38:51):
And set those things out though, Like start modeling
that and doing it now.
It's not going to happen unlessyou take action and kind of
make it happen, Like set theprecedence.
Speaker 2 (39:05):
You have to be intentional and model it.
Speaker 1 (39:08):
Right, right.
So when we say the kitchentable, we call it table time,
which is awesome to us and it'shuge and it speaks volumes to us
that so much life changehappens around the table.
And I hope, as you unpack that,have those conversations with
your significant other aboutwhat kind of culture are we
(39:29):
setting?
Is it around our table or is itaround our TV?
Are we watching TV and eatingand not even talking?
Are we doing those and what dowe want to change?
So how do we change it?
So you got a question.
Are we at the question portion?
Speaker 2 (39:44):
here I have a question from the book okay the
book is a couple's journal, ayear of us, by alicia munoz, and
we've mentioned this bookbefore and great book.
We have got to reach out to her.
We have said a hundred timesthat we're going to reach out to
her because she has severalbooks that are about connecting.
Speaker 1 (40:04):
Let me tell you this Okay, on any of our socials, if
you will just log in on therefor the first five folks that
actually log in and share atable story, a story that's
happened at your table.
Speaker 2 (40:16):
I will buy you this book.
Speaker 1 (40:17):
And send it to you.
Yeah, I will to you First fivepeople will buy you the book and
I'll have it shipped to you.
Speaker 2 (40:23):
We have had the best time with this book.
Speaker 1 (40:26):
You've got to participate, so you've got to go
in there in the commentssection and share your story
about something fun thathappened at the table.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
Yeah, some intentional table time.
Speaker 1 (40:36):
Awesome and this is great, but you'll love it.
Okay, go ahead.
Question.
Speaker 2 (40:39):
Here's the question.
I've skipped around in the book.
We don't go in order.
Speaker 1 (40:43):
No, we don't.
Speaker 2 (40:45):
You can't tell me what to do, don't care, yes, and
as I put on my reading glassesbecause I can't see.
Okay, so here's the question.
You ready?
Babe?
Speaker 1 (40:56):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 2 (40:57):
What do you consider one of the most fascinating or
unusual things about me?
Most fascinating or what orunusual.
Speaker 1 (41:10):
Or unusual.
Speaker 2 (41:11):
Unusual is not negative.
A lot of people think it is.
Speaker 1 (41:15):
No, I don't think of it.
I love unusual.
Speaker 2 (41:17):
Unusual.
Speaker 1 (41:21):
I actually think you have All right, the one, the
first thing that pops to mind.
I'm so excited, it's so fast.
You find the excitement and joyand sometimes I think, the most
mundane things I've ever seenin my life.
Speaker 2 (41:43):
Don't talk about traveling.
We talked about that, no.
Speaker 1 (41:45):
I'm not, but it's just like, even if we're like,
hey, we're going to a newrestaurant or we're going to go
try out a new, we found this newwinery on TikTok or Instagram.
Yeah, you get so, yeah, see,you're doing it, you get so
excited about it and I'm likeokay, it's another winery, you
know what I'm saying.
But then it's like okay, it'sanother restaurant, but your
(42:08):
excitement is contagious andit's just kind of fun, like a
few nights ago I sent you thatlink on Instagram.
Speaker 2 (42:15):
I was like I have to go here for my birthday this
year.
Speaker 1 (42:17):
It's like the garden, like the garden, the garden
room in Atlanta.
Yeah, the garden room, it's sofreaking beautiful.
Speaker 2 (42:22):
There are flowers and flowering trees everywhere
Inside a place.
Speaker 1 (42:27):
But it's not only see , it's not just the excitement
to go to that place, it's thatwhen we're there, oh my God,
yeah, you're like a kid who justwalked into a toy store.
Speaker 2 (42:38):
I'm a kid who just walked into a book fair.
Speaker 1 (42:39):
Yeah, you get so, mom , I don't even talk about the
bookmobile, but you get soexcited about those things and
that's contagious.
And that's one of those thingsI just love about you, because
my side, the me, and I know thisabout myself.
I underplay everything and Idon't get excited about much.
I should.
Sometimes I do, sometimes Iget— I have to remind you to be
(43:01):
excited.
Yeah, I get excited aboutGeorgia football.
Speaker 2 (43:03):
Just that's a natural thing for me, well, but I I
have to remind you to be excitedabout normal things.
Speaker 1 (43:10):
Yes, Thank you.
That sounds like such a jerk.
Speaker 2 (43:15):
No, no, no no, no, no , no, that came out wrong.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so so sorry, Don'tapologize, that's all good.
I have to remind you to beexcited about everyday things.
Speaker 1 (43:28):
Right.
Celebrate the small victoriesand be excited about them.
Speaker 2 (43:31):
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (43:32):
Okay, so enough on kicking me.
What is it?
Flip it.
Can we kick Greg?
Enough, let's do something good.
Speaker 2 (43:38):
No, and this may sound negative and it's not.
Speaker 1 (43:44):
The way— Okay, when you start it that way, it's
definitely negative, Like youdon't start with like— I just
hit the microphone.
Speaker 2 (43:50):
I am fascinated by the way that you—.
Oh Lord no the way you use yourADD to your advantage.
That's fascinating.
Speaker 1 (44:04):
What do you mean?
I don's fascinating.
What do you mean?
I don't understand.
Speaker 2 (44:06):
What do I mean?
You can be thinking seventhoughts at the same time, but
give them equal attention.
Speaker 1 (44:20):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (44:21):
And go down seven different paths of thought.
Well, I am not capable of that.
Speaker 1 (44:29):
It's actually incredibly exhausting, though
I'm sure it is, yeah, it's not.
Speaker 2 (44:32):
But from a type A personality over here I cannot
do that.
It's fascinating the way yourbrain works.
Now it's exhausting in aconversation.
Speaker 1 (44:44):
I know it's exhausting for you to live with
me and have to talk, just aconversation.
Speaker 2 (44:48):
I mean, even this evening, before I had to go back
to work for a family event, Iwas trying to share something
and you wanted to talk aboutwhat was in your brain.
I was like no, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
And you said okay.
And I was like no, no, no, no,wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
And you said okay.
And I was like in my head I waslike you're not listening to
what I'm about to say, but I do?
Speaker 1 (45:08):
I do listen, because a lot of times I lose those
thoughts Like if I don't saythem, sometimes because I'm
intrigued by what you're saying.
Speaker 2 (45:23):
I'll let go of that and latch onto what you're
talking about and I can't evenremember what I was talking
about.
But then on my receiving endI'm like you're not listening to
me because the seven otherthoughts are over there having
fireworks and it's a party.
But I need you to zone in onwhat I'm saying.
But it's fascinating that youcan do that, because I'm not
capable of that.
Speaker 1 (45:36):
Alright, yeah, it feels so encouraging, it is
encouraging.
Speaker 2 (45:42):
I'm fascinated by that because I can't do that.
Speaker 1 (45:45):
Well, yeah, I was telling Jess all the things.
Like we literally sat downtoday and I was like here's the
things I want to do with baggageclaim and I started laying out
like five different things,because I can't sleep at night
and I've got on this YouTubekick to where I'm watching lots
of YouTube videos at night and Iwas like I'm going to stop
doing that and watching lots ofYouTube videos and I was like
I'm going to stop doing that andI'm going to start being very
intentional about our plans forbaggage claim and what we're
(46:06):
going to do moving forward tohelp other couples.
Speaker 2 (46:09):
And he's laying out seven or eight, nine, ten things
where his thoughts are, and I'mlike— Jess is like what are we
going to talk about tonight?
Yeah, I'm like what are wetalking about today?
And today I have my littlenotebook here.
If you're watching us onYouTube.
Speaker 1 (46:26):
If you're not watching us, you're listening.
Speaker 2 (46:28):
But it's okay also if you're not watching and you're
listening.
But I have this beautifulleather-bound notebook where I
have our little outline.
That helps me.
I figured that out two or threeepisodes in that.
I need this, right, you don't.
Speaker 1 (46:48):
No, I go better without it, so here's our
takeaways.
Thank you for sitting with usthrough this tonight.
Yeah, thank you and thank youfor allowing us to share a huge
part of our lives.
The table in our home is veryspecial.
The table itself is not special.
(47:09):
The symbol of what it means is.
So I would say find somethingin your house that's special for
you and your family, and manlean in hard on that, like go
all in, lean in hard and rightnow, go all in lean in hard.
Speaker 2 (47:23):
And right now we've been sharing things that have
worked.
Have there been things thathave not worked for us?
Speaker 1 (47:28):
A thousand percent A million percent.
Speaker 2 (47:31):
We are not sharing this with all of you to say like
we are so perfect and this iswhat you should do.
Speaker 1 (47:38):
Lord, no, no.
So that's, if you havesomething that you think of,
that you go.
Hey, Jess, hey, Jess, Greg, ifyou thought of this, please,
please, please, reach out to usand just say what about this?
Speaker 2 (47:49):
Like we want you to interact with us.
If you're in a virus Texas, orif you're not, you know, Send us
a.
Speaker 1 (47:54):
DM, Send us a like, just reach out to us on any of
the socials.
Speaker 2 (47:58):
We're all there.
Or even how did you handle XYZ?
Speaker 1 (48:01):
Yeah, we would love to interact and help.
We want to give you stuff thatyou can use.
And again, this is not just tolisten to and go oh, that sounds
really cool, go put feet to itand practice it.
Speaker 2 (48:13):
I love you.
No, we want you to literallytry what we're talking about.
Speaker 1 (48:18):
Try it, kick holes in it, tell us what works, what
didn't work, and let us help you.
So thank you guys.
Please, if you find this stuffgood, please share it with other
folks Like it.
Thanks for all you guys.
We're continuing to grow.
Speaker 2 (48:39):
Our reach continues to grow each week, which is
insane and crazy and fun.
It's crazy that people want tohear what we're talking about.
Speaker 1 (48:42):
Yeah, but thank you, guys, so I can't say it enough.
Thank you so much for listening.
Thank you for downloading andlistening to us while you drive.
We love you, guys and just knowour heart.
The reason we started this isto help you have a healthy,
strong marriage and to love yourspouse well.
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