January 31, 2024 • 19 mins
Have you ever felt like a lone warrior on your personal development quest? I've been there, too, until I discovered the sheer power of a rock-solid support system. In today's heart-to-heart, we unwrap the crucial role that encouragement and camaraderie play in our growth journey. I get real about my own battles with negativity and how I've learned to set boundaries, choosing to walk alongside high-vibe tribe members who elevate our collective vibrancy. We delve into the science of happiness—how neurotransmitters like oxytocin and serotonin are not just buzzwords but key players in our emotional well-being, and we examine how these chemical allies can help us flourish when we're in good company.
Fostering a supportive community isn't just a feel-good mantra; it's a lifeline that buoys us through the stormiest seas of life. Whether it's the grateful shoutouts to my own personal cheerleading squad or the open invitation to join our BalanceBaby family on Instagram, this conversation is an ode to the power of connection. Without my own network, the lows would have been lower, and the highs, perhaps not as high. So I'm urging you to lean in, listen, and let's share this winding, wonderful path of personal evolution together. Remember, the true art of balance is in seeking out those who hold us steady and lift us higher.
Join our community of radiant souls. Subscribe and tune in every Wednesday to hear the latest episode. Be a part of a vibrant tribe that supports, inspires, and grows together.
Follow on Instagram: @balancebabypodcast
Follow on Tiktok: @balancebabypodcast
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Harkaren (00:03):
Hello everyone and welcome to Balance Baby, the
podcast designed to help youconsistently show up as the best
version of yourself.
My name is Harkaren and I'll beyour host.
I'll be here every week sharingstories and teaching you
techniques to prioritize theonly thing we have any control
(00:25):
over in this world Ourselves.
Up until now, our focus hasbeen on us, because this podcast
is about becoming the bestversion of ourselves.
The truth is, we cannot be thebest versions of ourselves
without the others in our lives.
(00:48):
Personal development is oftenseen as a solo journey.
We envision ourselvesconquering mountains and
overcoming challengesindependently, and while
self-reliance is essential onour journey of personal
development, it's important tounderstand the impact our
support system has on our growth.
It's not just about havingsomeone to lean on during tough
(01:11):
times.
It's about having people whocelebrate your victories, big
and small, who are in yourcorner, cheering you on.
That collective energy becomesa force that propels you to
reach new heights.
It gives you the boost ofencouragement you might need
when your personal motivation islacking.
Your support system can be madeup of friends, family, your
(01:36):
partner or even professionalsreally anyone who you feel
supported by.
Human beings are socialcreatures and we need to feel a
sense of connection andbelonging to thrive.
The people we keep closest tous have the ability to influence
our mindset, our stress levelsand our overall well-being.
(01:59):
Research has shown time andtime again that positive social
interactions stimulate ourbrains in remarkable ways.
Neurotransmitters such asoxytocin, serotonin and dopamine
work together to enhance ourmood, alleviate stress and
foster an environment thatsupports personal growth.
(02:21):
As you elevate your life,seeking personal development and
positive experiences, you mightfind that you start out growing
relationships with certainpeople.
Maybe they're not growing atthe same rate as you or, worse,
maybe they're not growing at all.
This isn't about superiority,but it's a natural progression
(02:44):
on your journey towards a morefulfilling and meaningful life.
You have to be willing to letgo of what is no longer serving
you.
Outgrowing people on yourjourney of personal development
doesn't mean abandoning them.
It means prioritizing yourmental and emotional well-being.
Sometimes it's about settingboundaries to protect your
(03:06):
positive energy.
On this journey, being mindfulof the people you keep close
becomes crucial.
I want to backtrack a bit tosomething we discussed in the
first episode.
When we are reactive, we giveour control to the person who is
triggering us.
I used to have a lot oflow-vibe people.
(03:29):
In my life, I had people aroundme who would intentionally
trigger me to get a reaction,mainly because they knew they
could.
Whenever I would make progresstowards my goals, they would
attempt to sabotage me.
When I would get a new job orbe studying for an exam, they
would start arguments with me soas to keep my attention divided
(03:52):
.
These are absolutely the worsttype of people you can keep
around you.
If you stay in these circles,you will become one of them.
Please don't let this happen toyou.
I always had good people in mylife and I could have turned to
them, but there was a part ofmyself that didn't feel good
(04:13):
enough, so I would allow peopleto treat me badly because,
subconsciously, there was a partof me that believed I deserved
it.
I share this because I want youto be honest with yourself.
What standards are you holdingyourself and others to?
I'm someone who's always beenhyper-independent.
(04:34):
I'm a problem solver and I willalways try to figure things out
on my own.
I used to have a hard timeasking for and accepting help a
classic case of middle childsyndrome but as time went on, I
realized how important it is tohave people around who can
support you.
Even though I used to preferdoing things independently, I've
(04:59):
come to see that having asupport system is crucial.
It's not just about fixingproblems.
It's also about having peoplethere for you emotionally,
sharing different perspectivesand going through experiences
together.
Understanding the value of asupport system doesn't mean
giving up being independent.
(05:19):
It actually makes you stronger.
It shows that, no matter howcapable you are on your own,
there are times when workingtogether with others can make
you even better.
Seeking help is a sign ofstrength.
It indicates a willingness tolearn from others and
recognizing the power of havinga well-rounded group to lean on.
(05:45):
Think about a time where you'vebeen caught in a negative
thought loop.
Your whole day has been offbecause you just can't seem to
shake the negativity.
You've tried meditating andgoing for a walk, but it just
doesn't seem to be working.
Things are triggering you andit seems to be getting worse.
Then you get a text fromsomeone in your support system.
(06:06):
You decide to open up to themand tell them what's been on
your mind.
You already start feelingbetter just by sharing the
silent burden you've beencarrying.
Maybe they offer you aperspective that you hadn't
considered yet.
Suddenly, your big issuedoesn't seem like such a big
deal anymore.
Or, alternatively, maybesomething terrible is happening
(06:30):
in your life, like maybe you'regoing through a divorce.
You've been trying to hold ittogether but you just can't
anymore.
Your self-esteem is low, yourself-confidence is low and your
future is not looking so bright.
You open up to your siblingsand you're reminded that you are
loved, you are cared for andthat everything is going to be
(06:53):
alright.
When people show up for you,when they are there for you in
your time of need, you build adeeper and stronger connection
with them, leading to a deepersense of fulfillment in your
life.
You need people in your lifewho remind you how great you are
, people who you can trust withyour whole heart.
(07:17):
People who are not aligned withyour positive energy and growth
mindset might inadvertently actas energy vampires.
Energy vampires are people whoknowingly or unknowingly drain
your energy and enthusiasm.
They might be constantlynegative, unsupportive or
(07:38):
resistant to change.
It comes from a lack ofself-awareness and our job is
not to judge them Honestly.
We've all been there at onepoint or another.
Our job is to protect our peaceand to find support in people
who align with the highestversion of ourselves as you
(07:59):
continue to work on yourself,you will naturally attract
people who are as committed totheir growth as you are.
But I want to elaborate alittle bit more on energy
vampires and how you can handlethe situation with grace.
Are there people in your lifewho are constantly complaining?
They complain about their job,their spouse, their health,
(08:23):
their in-laws, their livingsituation, their finances, the
weather, the news, literallyanything and everything.
No one wants to hear it, butthey're not self-aware enough to
read the room, or they're soused to spending time with other
low-energy people that they'venormalized this behavior.
(08:44):
These are the same people whoare constantly involved in drama
and although they say they hatedrama, they are the common
denominator.
These are the people who havetime to sit around and gossip
about others.
No one who is pursuing afulfilling life has time to sit
around and gossip.
(09:04):
They are too focused onthemselves and their goals to
waste their time on suchlow-vibes activities.
I'm not talking about theoccasional complaint.
It's the constant complaining,the victim mentality, the
inflated self-pity.
Again, it all comes back to alack of self-awareness.
(09:25):
Here's the thing we have nocontrol over other people and
they have no control over us,even when it seems like they do
you give them control, dependingon how you react to them.
When it comes to handlingsituations with energy vampires,
it's crucial to approach themwith a delicate touch.
(09:48):
Rather than reacting withfrustration or annoyance,
consider responding withunderstanding.
Average that their behavior maybe rooted in their own
struggles and insecurities.
It's not about acceptingnegativity, but about preserving
your positive energy whileextending empathy.
(10:09):
Usually, though, the best wayto handle these situations is to
acknowledge that they are doingthe best they can and give them
space, recognizing andunderstanding that their best
might look different than yourbest, because, truly, we are all
doing the best we can.
(10:29):
Sometimes we have a greatercapacity and sometimes we don't,
but once you know better, youdo better.
The intention here is to informyou of the patterns that you
might be stuck in.
By embracing the idea thateveryone is doing their best,
you create space for compassionand understanding.
(10:50):
It allows you to navigatechallenging interactions without
feeling personally responsiblefor someone else's behavior.
This perspective encourages amore empathetic response,
creating an environment whereyou can protect your positive
energy while extendingunderstanding to those around
you.
(11:10):
Ultimately, by acknowledgingthe limitations of control over
others and embracing the conceptthat everyone is doing their
best, you can maintain your ownwell-being and continue to
elevate your life.
Setting boundaries is anothertechnique that is crucial when
dealing with energy vampires.
You don't have to absorb theirnegativity, politely and firmly
(11:36):
express your boundaries, makingit clear that you prefer
positive and constructiveconversations.
Redirect discussions towardsolutions rather than dwelling
on problems.
This reminds me of a particularscenario I had experienced.
I had someone venting to meregularly about their life
problems.
I would offer advice as best aspossible, but I would always
(12:00):
leave our interactions feelingcompletely drained of my energy.
The next time I saw them, itwas the same thing.
They weren't implementing myadvice.
They weren't making any changes, they were just allowing their
circumstances to keep themmiserable.
I eventually had to put my footdown and tell them that I was
no longer available to listen totheir venting.
(12:22):
They would have to find anotheroutlet.
I made sure that they knew Iwas still here to support them
as best as I could, but that theventing drained me and I
couldn't allow it anymore.
This person respected myboundaries and eventually found
better ways to cope.
They eventually made thechanges needed to improve their
(12:42):
life experience and ourrelationship only grew closer in
the process.
Remember, handling energyvampires is not about judgment.
It's about self-preservation.
By protecting your peace andactively seeking positive
connections, you can navigatethese situations with grace and
(13:04):
continue on your path ofpersonal growth.
It's essential to surroundyourself with people who uplift
and inspire you.
Seek out individuals who shareyour positive energy and growth
mindset.
Cultivate relationships withthose who contribute to your
well-being and personaldevelopment.
This doesn't mean cutting offeveryone who may have moments of
(13:27):
negativity, but rather creatinga balanced circle that supports
your journey towards the bestversion of yourself.
And here's the beautiful partas much as your support system
uplifts you, you have theincredible opportunity to be
that pillar for someone else.
Your journey of personaldevelopment becomes a shared
(13:50):
experience of growth, resilienceand mutual inspiration.
This is exactly what is meantby raising the collective
consciousness.
When you extend a helping hand,share your experiences or
simply lend an empathetic ear,you contribute to the elevation
of awareness and understanding.
(14:11):
Each act of support andencouragement sends positive
ripples through theinterconnected web of humanity.
The more we lift each other up,the higher our collective
consciousness rises.
As you inspire others toovercome challenges and embrace
their potential, you become anintegral part of the bigger
(14:33):
picture.
Have you heard of the phrasematch their energy?
I personally don't agree withthe sentiment.
If I'm vibrating at a higherfrequency, why would I lower my
vibe to match someone else?
Instead, I stay true to myselfand they can either elevate to
(14:54):
match me or they'll get leftbehind.
This aligns with the concept ofpersonal boundaries and
self-respect.
By staying true to your ownenergy, you prioritize your
well-being and maintain yourauthenticity.
It also implies a level ofself-confidence, acknowledging
the value of your own positiveenergy and its potential to
(15:17):
influence those around youpositively.
I urge us all to lead byexample and let others choose
whether to rise to the occasionor not.
I'd like to share a very realand very current example of this
.
As a single lady, the datingscene can be extremely draining
(15:38):
of your energy.
You spend days or weeks forminga meaningful connection with
someone only to have them poof,disappear, ghost you, but of
course, as we know, they alwayscome back.
How do you handle it when theycome back?
My approach to this has evolvedso much in the four years that
(16:02):
I've been single because I'vehealed and grown so much in that
time.
I remember the first guy whoghosted me.
I was so confused and I took itpersonally, coming out of a
long-term relationship andentering the dating scene in the
dating app era was a hugelearning curve.
I value good communication andI have no issue having tough
(16:27):
conversations, but I am theanomaly For most people it's
easier to avoid confrontation.
I've had people tell me to playthe same game back, but I just
don't have time for that and,like I said, I'd rather lead by
example.
Now, being who I am and theplace I am in, I get to respond
(16:50):
with kindness as if nothing everhappened.
Why?
Because that's who I am and I'mnot going to let someone else's
behavior dictate how I act.
I know that someone ghosting mehas nothing to do with me.
It's their insecurities, it'stheir overthinking, it's their
(17:10):
lack of maturity.
It makes me feel sorry for thembecause I can see that they're
lacking something withinthemselves.
They are doing the best theycan given their current
circumstances.
I know that anyone who is wholeand fulfilled doesn't feel the
need to ghost, so all I can dois offer them my kindness.
(17:31):
I don't need to allow them backinto my life, or I can.
It's really up to me andwhether I find value in
maintaining that relationship.
But you can only act in thisway when you're aligned with
your higher self and showing upauthentically.
When you're coming from a placeof alignment, you stop taking
(17:52):
things personally because youcan see the humanity in everyone
, because you are at peace andyou are protecting your peace.
You're not looking forvalidation.
You already feel loved andsupported because you've
cultivated a support system whoreminds you who you are.
So be kind to the ghost.
(18:13):
They need it.
Thank you so much for tuning into my fifth episode.
I know this one was a littledifferent, but it's so necessary
to understand these concepts onyour personal growth journey.
I am super fortunate for thepeople I have in my life.
I have the best siblings andthe most amazing cousins.
(18:35):
I have thoughtful and caringfriends who want nothing more
than to see all my dreams cometrue.
They have supported me throughsome of the most challenging
experiences of my life.
They have been my crutches, mycheerleaders and my confidants.
No matter how positive andaligned you are, there will be
(18:55):
times when you need the supportof others, and this is exactly
why this podcast exists.
If you need strong andsupportive people in your life,
I'm here for you.
Head over to my Instagram atBalanceBaby podcast and be sure
to hit follow.
Send me a DM and tell me whatyou're struggling with.
(19:15):
I'd be happy to help if I can.
Together here, we're creating acommunity of beautiful souls,
ready to uplift each other,ready to experience all the joy
that this life has to offer us.
And don't forget life is allabout Balance.
Baby.
Hello everyone and welcome to Balance Baby, the
podcast designed to help youconsistently show up as the best
version of yourself.
My name is Harkaren and I'll beyour host.
I'll be here every week sharingstories and teaching you
techniques to prioritize theonly thing we have any control
(00:25):
over in this world Ourselves.
Up until now, our focus hasbeen on us, because this podcast
is about becoming the bestversion of ourselves.
The truth is, we cannot be thebest versions of ourselves
without the others in our lives.
(00:48):
Personal development is oftenseen as a solo journey.
We envision ourselvesconquering mountains and
overcoming challengesindependently, and while
self-reliance is essential onour journey of personal
development, it's important tounderstand the impact our
support system has on our growth.
It's not just about havingsomeone to lean on during tough
(01:11):
times.
It's about having people whocelebrate your victories, big
and small, who are in yourcorner, cheering you on.
That collective energy becomesa force that propels you to
reach new heights.
It gives you the boost ofencouragement you might need
when your personal motivation islacking.
Your support system can be madeup of friends, family, your
(01:36):
partner or even professionalsreally anyone who you feel
supported by.
Human beings are socialcreatures and we need to feel a
sense of connection andbelonging to thrive.
The people we keep closest tous have the ability to influence
our mindset, our stress levelsand our overall well-being.
(01:59):
Research has shown time andtime again that positive social
interactions stimulate ourbrains in remarkable ways.
Neurotransmitters such asoxytocin, serotonin and dopamine
work together to enhance ourmood, alleviate stress and
foster an environment thatsupports personal growth.
(02:21):
As you elevate your life,seeking personal development and
positive experiences, you mightfind that you start out growing
relationships with certainpeople.
Maybe they're not growing atthe same rate as you or, worse,
maybe they're not growing at all.
This isn't about superiority,but it's a natural progression
(02:44):
on your journey towards a morefulfilling and meaningful life.
You have to be willing to letgo of what is no longer serving
you.
Outgrowing people on yourjourney of personal development
doesn't mean abandoning them.
It means prioritizing yourmental and emotional well-being.
Sometimes it's about settingboundaries to protect your
(03:06):
positive energy.
On this journey, being mindfulof the people you keep close
becomes crucial.
I want to backtrack a bit tosomething we discussed in the
first episode.
When we are reactive, we giveour control to the person who is
triggering us.
I used to have a lot oflow-vibe people.
(03:29):
In my life, I had people aroundme who would intentionally
trigger me to get a reaction,mainly because they knew they
could.
Whenever I would make progresstowards my goals, they would
attempt to sabotage me.
When I would get a new job orbe studying for an exam, they
would start arguments with me soas to keep my attention divided
(03:52):
.
These are absolutely the worsttype of people you can keep
around you.
If you stay in these circles,you will become one of them.
Please don't let this happen toyou.
I always had good people in mylife and I could have turned to
them, but there was a part ofmyself that didn't feel good
(04:13):
enough, so I would allow peopleto treat me badly because,
subconsciously, there was a partof me that believed I deserved
it.
I share this because I want youto be honest with yourself.
What standards are you holdingyourself and others to?
I'm someone who's always beenhyper-independent.
(04:34):
I'm a problem solver and I willalways try to figure things out
on my own.
I used to have a hard timeasking for and accepting help a
classic case of middle childsyndrome but as time went on, I
realized how important it is tohave people around who can
support you.
Even though I used to preferdoing things independently, I've
(04:59):
come to see that having asupport system is crucial.
It's not just about fixingproblems.
It's also about having peoplethere for you emotionally,
sharing different perspectivesand going through experiences
together.
Understanding the value of asupport system doesn't mean
giving up being independent.
(05:19):
It actually makes you stronger.
It shows that, no matter howcapable you are on your own,
there are times when workingtogether with others can make
you even better.
Seeking help is a sign ofstrength.
It indicates a willingness tolearn from others and
recognizing the power of havinga well-rounded group to lean on.
(05:45):
Think about a time where you'vebeen caught in a negative
thought loop.
Your whole day has been offbecause you just can't seem to
shake the negativity.
You've tried meditating andgoing for a walk, but it just
doesn't seem to be working.
Things are triggering you andit seems to be getting worse.
Then you get a text fromsomeone in your support system.
(06:06):
You decide to open up to themand tell them what's been on
your mind.
You already start feelingbetter just by sharing the
silent burden you've beencarrying.
Maybe they offer you aperspective that you hadn't
considered yet.
Suddenly, your big issuedoesn't seem like such a big
deal anymore.
Or, alternatively, maybesomething terrible is happening
(06:30):
in your life, like maybe you'regoing through a divorce.
You've been trying to hold ittogether but you just can't
anymore.
Your self-esteem is low, yourself-confidence is low and your
future is not looking so bright.
You open up to your siblingsand you're reminded that you are
loved, you are cared for andthat everything is going to be
(06:53):
alright.
When people show up for you,when they are there for you in
your time of need, you build adeeper and stronger connection
with them, leading to a deepersense of fulfillment in your
life.
You need people in your lifewho remind you how great you are
, people who you can trust withyour whole heart.
(07:17):
People who are not aligned withyour positive energy and growth
mindset might inadvertently actas energy vampires.
Energy vampires are people whoknowingly or unknowingly drain
your energy and enthusiasm.
They might be constantlynegative, unsupportive or
(07:38):
resistant to change.
It comes from a lack ofself-awareness and our job is
not to judge them Honestly.
We've all been there at onepoint or another.
Our job is to protect our peaceand to find support in people
who align with the highestversion of ourselves as you
(07:59):
continue to work on yourself,you will naturally attract
people who are as committed totheir growth as you are.
But I want to elaborate alittle bit more on energy
vampires and how you can handlethe situation with grace.
Are there people in your lifewho are constantly complaining?
They complain about their job,their spouse, their health,
(08:23):
their in-laws, their livingsituation, their finances, the
weather, the news, literallyanything and everything.
No one wants to hear it, butthey're not self-aware enough to
read the room, or they're soused to spending time with other
low-energy people that they'venormalized this behavior.
(08:44):
These are the same people whoare constantly involved in drama
and although they say they hatedrama, they are the common
denominator.
These are the people who havetime to sit around and gossip
about others.
No one who is pursuing afulfilling life has time to sit
around and gossip.
(09:04):
They are too focused onthemselves and their goals to
waste their time on suchlow-vibes activities.
I'm not talking about theoccasional complaint.
It's the constant complaining,the victim mentality, the
inflated self-pity.
Again, it all comes back to alack of self-awareness.
(09:25):
Here's the thing we have nocontrol over other people and
they have no control over us,even when it seems like they do
you give them control, dependingon how you react to them.
When it comes to handlingsituations with energy vampires,
it's crucial to approach themwith a delicate touch.
(09:48):
Rather than reacting withfrustration or annoyance,
consider responding withunderstanding.
Average that their behavior maybe rooted in their own
struggles and insecurities.
It's not about acceptingnegativity, but about preserving
your positive energy whileextending empathy.
(10:09):
Usually, though, the best wayto handle these situations is to
acknowledge that they are doingthe best they can and give them
space, recognizing andunderstanding that their best
might look different than yourbest, because, truly, we are all
doing the best we can.
(10:29):
Sometimes we have a greatercapacity and sometimes we don't,
but once you know better, youdo better.
The intention here is to informyou of the patterns that you
might be stuck in.
By embracing the idea thateveryone is doing their best,
you create space for compassionand understanding.
(10:50):
It allows you to navigatechallenging interactions without
feeling personally responsiblefor someone else's behavior.
This perspective encourages amore empathetic response,
creating an environment whereyou can protect your positive
energy while extendingunderstanding to those around
you.
(11:10):
Ultimately, by acknowledgingthe limitations of control over
others and embracing the conceptthat everyone is doing their
best, you can maintain your ownwell-being and continue to
elevate your life.
Setting boundaries is anothertechnique that is crucial when
dealing with energy vampires.
You don't have to absorb theirnegativity, politely and firmly
(11:36):
express your boundaries, makingit clear that you prefer
positive and constructiveconversations.
Redirect discussions towardsolutions rather than dwelling
on problems.
This reminds me of a particularscenario I had experienced.
I had someone venting to meregularly about their life
problems.
I would offer advice as best aspossible, but I would always
(12:00):
leave our interactions feelingcompletely drained of my energy.
The next time I saw them, itwas the same thing.
They weren't implementing myadvice.
They weren't making any changes, they were just allowing their
circumstances to keep themmiserable.
I eventually had to put my footdown and tell them that I was
no longer available to listen totheir venting.
(12:22):
They would have to find anotheroutlet.
I made sure that they knew Iwas still here to support them
as best as I could, but that theventing drained me and I
couldn't allow it anymore.
This person respected myboundaries and eventually found
better ways to cope.
They eventually made thechanges needed to improve their
(12:42):
life experience and ourrelationship only grew closer in
the process.
Remember, handling energyvampires is not about judgment.
It's about self-preservation.
By protecting your peace andactively seeking positive
connections, you can navigatethese situations with grace and
(13:04):
continue on your path ofpersonal growth.
It's essential to surroundyourself with people who uplift
and inspire you.
Seek out individuals who shareyour positive energy and growth
mindset.
Cultivate relationships withthose who contribute to your
well-being and personaldevelopment.
This doesn't mean cutting offeveryone who may have moments of
(13:27):
negativity, but rather creatinga balanced circle that supports
your journey towards the bestversion of yourself.
And here's the beautiful partas much as your support system
uplifts you, you have theincredible opportunity to be
that pillar for someone else.
Your journey of personaldevelopment becomes a shared
(13:50):
experience of growth, resilienceand mutual inspiration.
This is exactly what is meantby raising the collective
consciousness.
When you extend a helping hand,share your experiences or
simply lend an empathetic ear,you contribute to the elevation
of awareness and understanding.
(14:11):
Each act of support andencouragement sends positive
ripples through theinterconnected web of humanity.
The more we lift each other up,the higher our collective
consciousness rises.
As you inspire others toovercome challenges and embrace
their potential, you become anintegral part of the bigger
(14:33):
picture.
Have you heard of the phrasematch their energy?
I personally don't agree withthe sentiment.
If I'm vibrating at a higherfrequency, why would I lower my
vibe to match someone else?
Instead, I stay true to myselfand they can either elevate to
(14:54):
match me or they'll get leftbehind.
This aligns with the concept ofpersonal boundaries and
self-respect.
By staying true to your ownenergy, you prioritize your
well-being and maintain yourauthenticity.
It also implies a level ofself-confidence, acknowledging
the value of your own positiveenergy and its potential to
(15:17):
influence those around youpositively.
I urge us all to lead byexample and let others choose
whether to rise to the occasionor not.
I'd like to share a very realand very current example of this
.
As a single lady, the datingscene can be extremely draining
(15:38):
of your energy.
You spend days or weeks forminga meaningful connection with
someone only to have them poof,disappear, ghost you, but of
course, as we know, they alwayscome back.
How do you handle it when theycome back?
My approach to this has evolvedso much in the four years that
(16:02):
I've been single because I'vehealed and grown so much in that
time.
I remember the first guy whoghosted me.
I was so confused and I took itpersonally, coming out of a
long-term relationship andentering the dating scene in the
dating app era was a hugelearning curve.
I value good communication andI have no issue having tough
(16:27):
conversations, but I am theanomaly For most people it's
easier to avoid confrontation.
I've had people tell me to playthe same game back, but I just
don't have time for that and,like I said, I'd rather lead by
example.
Now, being who I am and theplace I am in, I get to respond
(16:50):
with kindness as if nothing everhappened.
Why?
Because that's who I am and I'mnot going to let someone else's
behavior dictate how I act.
I know that someone ghosting mehas nothing to do with me.
It's their insecurities, it'stheir overthinking, it's their
(17:10):
lack of maturity.
It makes me feel sorry for thembecause I can see that they're
lacking something withinthemselves.
They are doing the best theycan given their current
circumstances.
I know that anyone who is wholeand fulfilled doesn't feel the
need to ghost, so all I can dois offer them my kindness.
(17:31):
I don't need to allow them backinto my life, or I can.
It's really up to me andwhether I find value in
maintaining that relationship.
But you can only act in thisway when you're aligned with
your higher self and showing upauthentically.
When you're coming from a placeof alignment, you stop taking
(17:52):
things personally because youcan see the humanity in everyone
, because you are at peace andyou are protecting your peace.
You're not looking forvalidation.
You already feel loved andsupported because you've
cultivated a support system whoreminds you who you are.
So be kind to the ghost.
(18:13):
They need it.
Thank you so much for tuning into my fifth episode.
I know this one was a littledifferent, but it's so necessary
to understand these concepts onyour personal growth journey.
I am super fortunate for thepeople I have in my life.
I have the best siblings andthe most amazing cousins.
(18:35):
I have thoughtful and caringfriends who want nothing more
than to see all my dreams cometrue.
They have supported me throughsome of the most challenging
experiences of my life.
They have been my crutches, mycheerleaders and my confidants.
No matter how positive andaligned you are, there will be
(18:55):
times when you need the supportof others, and this is exactly
why this podcast exists.
If you need strong andsupportive people in your life,
I'm here for you.
Head over to my Instagram atBalanceBaby podcast and be sure
to hit follow.
Send me a DM and tell me whatyou're struggling with.
(19:15):
I'd be happy to help if I can.
Together here, we're creating acommunity of beautiful souls,
ready to uplift each other,ready to experience all the joy
that this life has to offer us.
And don't forget life is allabout Balance.
Baby.
Popular Podcasts
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.