What happens when a decorated military veteran steps into the world of entrepreneurship? Stacey Ray shares his riveting journey from military service to owning a successful Farmer's Insurance agency, alongside his wife, Heidi. Stacey’s story is filled with inspiring anecdotes of resilience, faith, and community support. He opens up about the critical mindset shifts required to transition from the regimented life of the military to the unpredictable world of business ownership, providing valuable lessons on perseverance and the importance of never quitting.
Stacey's military background instilled in him a spirit of unyielding resilience and the value of deep, meaningful connections. He discusses how these principles have guided his approach to building relationships in the insurance industry. This episode uncovers the often-overlooked aspects of running a business, such as the importance of educating clients about comprehensive coverage and the role of trusted advisors. Stacey highlights how genuine relationships and a personal touch are crucial for success, especially in a field where misunderstandings about business ownership are common.
Navigating personal hardships like cancer and miscarriages, Stacey’s story is a powerful testament to the importance of empathy, faith, and a supportive network. His experiences underscore the value of surrounding oneself with wise and supportive individuals, balancing work with family, and finding strength through faith. Tune in to hear how Stacey's journey has been shaped by his community and how his faith provides guidance amidst life's challenges. This episode is a compelling conversation about resilience, personal growth, and the essence of community.
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Episode Transcript
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Dr DeWayne Baugus (00:01):
Thank you for joining us again with Balancing
Life and Medicine.
We're here with Stacey Raycovering some major topics as
far as where we fit in thecommunity, how we tie into it
when we face adversity, and hownot to quit, to keep moving
through and having God in ourlife, that support, that
foundation, when things aregoing great and when they're
(00:24):
going bad, how we grow throughthose with the Lord at our side,
all right.
With that being said, we'regoing to get right.
Get into it, stacey.
(00:45):
What is it that got you intoinsurance?
I mean you're you seriouslywant that story?
Well, I do, because the part ofus that has joined together as
far as being veterans, militarymindset, community-driven,
(01:08):
service-driven what is it that Imean?
I got out of the military and Ithought how can I make the most
money possible and survive?
And you came out of it verydifferent.
I was single.
You had a family.
You still do have a family.
So with that I mean you.
You were thinking long-termfoundations, community.
Talk to me a little bit about,like what military years into
(01:31):
farmer's insurance in that nextchapter of service.
Stacey Ray (01:35):
You know, it was kind of a blended deal because
you go active duty and then Ialso got off of active duty,
couldn't stay out long, join thereserves, right, got sent over
as a individual mobilizationaugmentee, which is basically
the army could put me as aninstructor wherever they wanted,
(01:56):
nice, but as a reservist, youknow, I was still.
I was having to work and again,our whole thought process I
think we're raised that way ofjust what is the thing that's
going to make you the most money, right, how?
And then, as a, as a husband,um, I had, you know, young kids.
Um, how do I, you know, bringhome the most money?
(02:20):
What's the most stable?
You know, stable is always abig deal, um, and I was in, as
you know, I was in the medicalum arena for a long time.
I sold high-end digitalradiography um and radiology
equipment, focused mainly in thedental arena, but, but
(02:45):
basically helped dentists andhelped dental schools make more
money type deal, and that was asecure type thing.
But I was always working forsomebody else, right?
Can I take off for this?
Can I go to my child's event?
Can I do this type of deal?
And you're always, when you'rein that arena, you're always
(03:07):
working for somebody else andthe back of my mind was always
um, and I'm using the wordalways a lot, but the back of my
mind there was that thoughtprocess of I want to work for
myself.
You know, I see theentrepreneurs out there.
It's scary about it.
And finally, there were somethings that were going on in the
(03:32):
job that I had prior and wewere praying and asking God to,
you know, open doors that needto be open and close those that
need to be closed.
God to open doors that need tobe opened and close those that
need to be closed.
And some of those were closeddirectly on my nose as I was
(03:53):
trying to force my way throughthe door and I had a great
friend that we had known formany years who kept saying
Stacey, Heidi, you should starta farmer's business, look at
having your own agency, start anagency, planting a seed,
Starting.
And that was the door thatstayed open, right.
And then another opportunity.
And you know, when I say westarted with a small business, I
(04:17):
mean, if some people are givena plant, we were given a seed.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (04:24):
So all the way from the root system.
Stacey Ray (04:25):
That's right you know, and we stopped.
We started in as Heidi and Iworking together.
We have worked together everyday for the last nine years.
That lucky lady you know hasbeen a part of this whole thing,
but that's really kind of howit started.
It went from being thatcorporate life to wanting to
(04:48):
have my own business andsomething that was ours.
To God put this in our path.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (04:54):
And there's a lot there to unpack too, isn't
there?
I mean because I know myexperience coming out of the
military.
There was a structure, themilitary, there was a structure.
And then you know, I got to seeso many different as you did as
well so many different familiesthat came apart during that
process of transitioning, and itspeaks a lot to your character
being able to make thosetransitions, put different hats
(05:16):
on and then start to develop abusiness from the roots, from
the seed, essentially with thefamily you're bringing along on
this trip.
I mean, your wife is amazing,your kids are amazing.
It doesn't mean that you didn'tget bumps and scrapes along the
way, but there's a recovery thatyou guys were able to do and
(05:38):
are always able to do.
It seems like to this day.
You know, with navigating life,the pitfalls of it.
But the part I want to unpackis what really kept your mind in
the game, because I've seen somany people pull the plug and
say I don't want to do this,especially from the military,
because we're hitting a brickwall and I don't think a lot of
(06:02):
civilians understand how muchstructure is given to us a job,
our uniform, everything's given.
Our family even knows theirstructure is there.
So to jump out of one fryingpan into literally a fire troop,
because the civilian worldwants to tear you apart and you
are focused mostly on money.
(06:23):
You have to be, because that'sthe goal is to feed everybody.
Stacey Ray (06:28):
I mean, there's no fallback of moving into the
barracks, right, you know it was.
It was a strange.
You brought up uniform and Iwas going to say that how weird
was it, when you got out of themilitary, that you had to pick
out your clothes every day?
Oh, right, and you had to looknice, you had to fit in.
(06:48):
You had to change that style Imean, this wavy, beautiful hair
wasn't always right Every sevendays.
You know, you get that haircuttype of thing and it is that
structure.
And then you know, as an NCO oras a a leader, you got to be
ahead of the game, right, it'snot that you're going to be just
(07:10):
following along.
You have young lives that arelooking up to you as well, and
you know it's the same thingwith our business.
So, um, if I didn't make it, myfamily don't need it.
Right, if we don't go out and Ithink that that was the big
charge of it's not that I don'twant to, it's that I have to
(07:35):
I've got to go out, I've got tolearn as much as I can, I've got
to start closing deals, I'vegot to and the fact that I
really enjoyed what we're doing,because it's more of a
protection thing.
What I do is we protectfamilies.
I think that, carried over froma lot of this stuff, as far as
I'm protecting my family, I'mprotecting my friends.
(07:57):
Same thing with, you know,military to civilian transition
of we're protecting people.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (08:04):
Yeah, but what I see you doing is now
you're protecting, like suburbsand cities and communities.
I mean because you're part ofso many different networks too,
right?
Oh yeah, I mean you got your hatand so many different things
(08:25):
and I try to imagine becausegetting to see your kids grow,
recently married, you knowthere's all kinds of moving
parts in there.
You and your wife have beenpretty much able to go through
all these changes and show yourchildren how to do it.
No one's perfect but topersevere, to keep going and
also to stay plugged into acommunity that you know needs
you.
How do we balance that?
(08:47):
I mean, like I know there's atime as an entrepreneur when
you're waiting for that seed tosprout.
Stacey Ray (08:55):
And it's like come on, take off.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (08:56):
This has got to go, and that pressure that
you have to deliver, but yet youalways.
You have a love for people.
It's not just people.
Stacey Ray (09:05):
It's not just people .
Dr DeWayne Baugus (09:05):
It's like the community, and that also
reflects a really stablemarriage.
It may be rocky for all of usin our marriage at times, but
there's a stability there thathas withstood so much change.
And where do you like farmers?
You started that a few yearsago.
Now it seems like you'rerunning an empire.
Stacey Ray (09:28):
I wish that that was the case, and if empire is out
there, that's fine.
I hope that that comes.
It's more along the lines of Ihave a great team right there is
.
I have a great team of otherbusiness owners right.
Um, I don't buy leads, I don'tdo that kind of stuff.
All of our growth, a lot of it,is organic by relationships.
(09:52):
I hope that when, just likethis business, right, if I was
to walk in here and Dr Dart wasthrowing the horse needles at me
and I didn't feel like Iconnect with you, well, why
would I come back?
I think it's the same thing inany business.
You know that first year, gosh,you're just trying to put the
(10:16):
wheels on the cart.
Right, you got the plans butthe cart's not even rolling.
The second year, finally,you're trying to get it to roll.
That third year you've got somemomentum and you've got the
bumps and bruises from themistakes that you made and with
my wife and now my son workingwith us in the agency, it was
(10:39):
just kind of a naturalprogression.
And, yes, there were a lot oftimes when we were like we were
making nothing compared to whatwe were doing in the you know
the medical uh side of things toshift.
You know how do you, how do youtransition from there and is it
worth it?
Just go get a job, getinsurance and everything else
that comes along, medicalinsurance and that kind of thing
(11:00):
.
But you, you know, and we prayeda lot, we had a lot of people
that supported us.
My friend up in Collinsville,Wilbur Lee, and Tara Tucker,
were instrumental in guiding us.
I was just smart enough to dowhat they told me to do in a lot
of ways right.
And we, you know, we've beenblessed.
(11:24):
God has put this in our pathand I truly think that if he
takes it out of our path, thenwe'll be successful there too.
And I think, kind of going backto some of that military thing
too, is don't quit, right, right, that's not an option.
There's not an option.
You can't quit, you don't wantto quit.
(11:44):
You've seen other people quitbut I'm not going to be that
person.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (11:48):
That's always in the back of your mind, isn't
it?
To just go back and get anotherjob somewhere else, oh yeah.
Stacey Ray (11:53):
I get offers all the time.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (11:54):
Yeah, I would imagine.
I mean, your personality fitsso many different lanes, so many
different career fields, but Ithink your heart is in service
your way, not managed by someoneelse.
I mean, obviously, heidimanages you, thank you, thank
you, thank you so much.
We all Tulsa knows.
(12:15):
So with that, though, yourheart has to be in it, and
that's something I got todiscuss with our buddy, nathan.
Is that connection with people?
Oh, yeah, and I think that thatdoes come from military service
.
There's a connection that yougain with strangers, right, it's
like strangers within the unit,they automatically become
(12:36):
family, and I think that that'skind of what we're looking for
as veterans when we get out,there's another family to plug
into, to have a purpose when weget out there's another family
to plug into to have a purpose.
Stacey Ray (12:48):
Well, didn't we do that with Little League Baseball
, with high school sports?
If you're doing individualsports, then that's one thing.
You're leaning on your ownskills or whatever.
I think, when we're able to,because if you know anything
about me, it's about the team,it's not me, it's not just Heidi
, it's our, the people that wesurround ourselves with.
(13:09):
Um, when I you were talkingabout, uh, you take a beating
every now and again because theinsurance industry or any
business, right, you see peopleat their best and helping and
things have gone the absolutebest.
You see people in a situationwhere it's the worst, and
sometimes it's the worst day oftheir lives and you're helping
(13:33):
them through that.
But it's not always the rightoutcome or the best outcome that
they wanted.
You help them through that aswell and you help them through
that as well.
And when I do get down and takethat beating, and you know me,
I'm up, walking around, I'mtalking.
I don't sit down to talk on thephone.
(13:54):
It's bugging me, even just sathere.
You know me.
I want to jump up and walkaround and talk, but it's about
the community and it's about ourfriends and I can call people
like you and say or you know,stacy, I can sit in your eyes,
what's going on?
And we have those conversations.
You decompress the, thepunching bag gets worked over at
(14:19):
the house quite a bit.
But then you again, what elsecould I be doing?
I'm blessed at what I'm doing,I'm thankful for what we um, for
what we have and um.
But everybody's got their baddays and we just kind of yeah
roll with those punches and tryto get back into it regroup,
yeah, regroup and and and keepgoing forward with it.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (14:41):
I know and there's, as we just kind of went
over, there's many differentthings that you could do, but I
don't know that I could see youshine any brighter than how you
shine with your wife workingwith insurance.
I mean, I get to see itfirsthand, my wife and I.
I mean you're the first one togive me the talk of oh so you've
(15:02):
got your own business.
I mean because you guys werethere at that time and now
everybody thinks that you'rerich, the rich business owner,
which is completely, you knowit's upside down.
You know, if you, if you, ifyou see a giant skyscraper, just
turn it upside down, we're atthe bottom of that, like um
starting over.
But the perspective of otherslooking from from the outside in
(15:25):
is it can be dangerous.
It can be dangerous for you canmake you a target for the
public who doesn't understand,or people who are just out there
trying to take.
And it was interesting becausewe've had insurance companies
work with us before.
But there was a lack ofpersonal touch.
In fact, I thought I knewinsurance.
(15:45):
I didn't.
My education on insurance waswell.
Let me just say I didn't evenhave my notebooks for pre-K.
As far as understanding thedepth of insurance, that needs
to be understood as a businessowner, and you were able to take
that time with both my wife andI and say, look, you guys need
to be covered and this is howyou do it.
(16:07):
But you didn't just say that.
You explained it.
You explained the dynamics ofthe public, the entrepreneur,
the business owner, the targetsthat you become and how people
can sneak into your life and howactually it seems like the
system is made for that.
You have to have someone likeyou.
We have to have someone likeyou on our team because, as a
(16:31):
physician, there's so manythings that can go wrong and
people can twist things andattorneys can twist things and
lawsuits can into, and thenyou're just like you said.
You see people when they'redoing great, but the next week,
if they're not set up andprotected by insurance by a
passionate individual likeyourself that's covering every
(16:51):
basis, next week they can begone it truly can be.
Stacey Ray (16:55):
Look at the storms that we've had over the last
couple weeks here in our areatornadoes, um.
In a lot of ways, you know it'sum.
It can be frustrating whenyou're um, when you're starting
out and when you're getting withpeople and you're talking about
new opportunities, especiallywith business and, like you said
, we are the rich businessowners but they don't see us
(17:18):
taking out the trash.
They don't see us trying to getthe fax machine working.
They don't see us.
Everything else that we have todo is the nug right.
Everything else that we have todo is the nug right, so the
chief gnome running aroundtrying to get everything done,
(17:38):
you know, so that the doors canopen on the business and
maintain it.
Customer service is a big deal.
I think that's why you and Imesh so well along with these
other things.
Is it's really about customerservice?
How do you give somebody thetype of service that you would
want to in our industry?
In a lot of ways, customerservice is dead right.
Yes, it's always the phone call.
(17:59):
Hey, my name is Stacey Ray.
We would like to sell youinsurance.
I can be five dollars cheaperthan my competitor, but what is
it going to cost you to savethat $5 if there's an accident,
what's the total amount ofout-of-pocket that can be?
And I had to learn that too ofwhere are the and I use this
(18:32):
analogy, I think even with youand Ildi is where are the gaps
in the armor, right?
I mean, where are thosepotential holes that somebody
can get into and and take fromyou?
And then you know what are wecomfortable with?
Our own potential umco-insurances, right?
Or our own potentialout-of-pocket expenses?
Am I okay with a thousanddollar bad day because I backed
into the, you know, the mailboxor whatever?
Okay, I get that, yeah.
But I'm not okay with a tenthousand dollar back day because
(18:56):
I went from x amount ofcoverage to liability only and
now I have to replace thevehicle.
If you don't build thatrelationship with the business
owner, if you don't build thatrelationship with the business
owner, if you don't rebuild thatrelationship with your customer
, then you don't know wheretheir pain points are at,
because you, the amazing richguy that you are, you know you
(19:20):
could probably just write acheck for it and everything
would be just fine.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (19:24):
I don't know that I could do that If someone
was to do something like that.
My job is I am supposed to beso, like you said, customer
service, bedside manner,comforting, relaxing.
I use acupuncture needles everyday.
If I come in enraged I may hurt.
No, I wouldn't hurt anybody.
But that changes my touch.
(19:44):
Touch.
How are you today?
You know, yeah, that's so, it'sno, I don't bring that into
work, but you're part of mysecurity in my business.
I don't have to think aboutthat stuff and I know you do
that for so many in thecommunity as you bring that
comfort and they can go to workand focus on them because you do
(20:05):
what you do and I know you'vegot to realize the depth of that
.
I hope you do, but it isbecause of that that customer
service.
Stacey Ray (20:16):
You do unto others as you want to have done to
yourself, correct, and the wholegolden rule.
I was not always that guy.
In a lot of ways it was abouthow can I get my next paycheck
and what I need to be, and beinggone from the family and
traveling and everything elsethat went along with that.
(20:36):
But when you start gettingthese gray things on the side of
your head gray hair andeverything else there is some
wisdom that comes through.
You know, maybe that wasn't asimportant.
There is some wisdom that comesthrough.
You know, maybe that wasn't asimportant.
And seeing my son and mydaughter and my wife go through
the different things in theirdaily lives and being there with
them, I'm telling you peoplelaugh and I know you hear this
(20:58):
too.
People laugh that I work withmy wife every day for the last
nine years and survive marriedwith my best friend.
Right same thing with you andildy is everything sunshine and
rainbows.
No, it's not, but you'reholding yourself together.
You're holding each othertogether down the path of life.
(21:18):
And when I'm frustrated and mad, heidi goes seriously let it go
, let's move on from there.
And it's the same thing whenshe's, you know, wanting to rage
about somebody else.
You have that partner there tosay OK, vent to me, reflect,
(21:42):
regroup and let's, let's moveforward.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (21:44):
Yeah, dust yourself off and let's, let's
move forward.
Stacey Ray (21:46):
yeah dust yourself off and let's keep going.
Well, yeah, and I, I use, youknow, that same friendship with
you and with some of my other umbusiness owners that we, you
know, we, we meet with and talkto of we're on an island in a
lot of ways, right in our dailylives.
Um, you have said this too.
If we don't have that time tocome together and kind of you
(22:08):
have said this too if we don'thave that time to come together
and kind of vent about some ofthose things or you know, the,
the, the, me too, gripe typethings, oh, I've seen it and we
talk about customers that we'vehad issues with and then we
laugh and we move on and we goback.
But sometimes it's the like Isaid earlier.
DeWayne, what's going on, doc?
How are you doing?
I can see you're tired in youreyes.
(22:29):
What's happening If you don'thave those relationships and
those people in your lives, likeNathan, like some of the other
people that you've talked to?
We cannot make this throughalone.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (22:42):
No, no, alone .
No, no, I want to.
I want to switch directions alittle bit, because that those,
how those relationships develop,um, they're intricate and they
get whittled down over time.
You see the real relationships,the real individuals in the
community and you see those thatkind of drift away, but as a as
a business grows and you seeother people grow, cause you're
(23:05):
growing as a community too,absolutely.
I know when we first met eachother it was over five years ago
, was it Six years?
Six years?
Yeah, I've got way more graysince I met you, so just knowing
there's more to be worriedabout.
Yeah, prettier, that's what mywife tells me.
So, anyway, she's encouraging,I love her.
(23:26):
I'm not going to adjust for aminute yet, but as we grow in
the community and our businessesgrow together, what we start to
see is a certain look like yousaid, picking each other up,
encouraging each other, becausewe know that being surrounding
(23:48):
ourself with those individualsis always going to keep us
encouraged as well.
It's that buddy check, it's,it's it's sticking in there and
going I, how are you today?
And I know many times you'vesent me a buddy check text.
And it's, it's buddy check,cool, and what you love, and
don't say that word.
I know based on that usuallyyou're checking in because you
(24:08):
need someone to check in to Verytrue, we reflect that.
You're right.
That's necessary, I think withthe networking groups that's one
of the core things I wish Icould see more entrepreneurs
grow out of the networkinggroups and become those pillars
and stand alone, because they'renot really standing alone.
(24:31):
They're always coming back andtied to us.
Stacey Ray (24:34):
Well, there's a responsibility.
I mean, you're several years inyour business growth, yeah, and
there is that fast rise.
There's the plateau.
Sometimes there can be adecline and then going back and
refocus.
But there's a responsibility inour community, like you were
(24:54):
talking about earlier of okay,I've hit a certain point.
How can I give back?
Yeah, how do I reach out toother people?
I think one of the greatestcompliments you could ever have
is somebody to say I see whatyou're doing and where you are.
Can you help me get there Right?
(25:16):
And then sometimes it's likewhat you don't see are all the
bumps and the bruises andeverything else that you have to
deal with.
Let's talk about getting downthat path and everything else
that you have to deal with.
Let's talk about getting downthat path and then that reach
out, that hand up out of thehole when you find that
opportunity to mentor and lead.
(25:39):
If you're not taking thoseopportunities, I think that you
will absolutely fail.
Because if you can teach me asa business owner or you can
remind yourself of oh, this ishow I got there, that's a daily
reflective of, okay, I got sogood at doing that that I went
on to doing something else andforgot how to keep myself going.
(26:01):
When you teach somebody, you'rereminding them and you're
reminding yourself.
You're teaching yourself again.
How do I stay successful?
That humbling.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (26:10):
True, that humbling.
I was discussing that withNathan as far as how do you stay
humble and that was the samekind of response he had was you
have to remind yourself, youhave to get back to your
foundations, you have to helppeople grow and give back.
And when it comes to business,I've had this question in my
(26:33):
mind for probably the last.
I'm short-minded, so about sixminutes.
So what I'm wondering is atwhat point did we stop having to
make those cold calls?
Because we went through thosegrowths in business, we had to
make those cold calls, we had tocall back, we had to follow up,
which we still do.
But getting through thatawkward phase to the point now
(26:57):
where people are coming in,people are being referred to you
because you're in the community, you're known.
How long that season of growthis, I think, is really dependent
on your personal character andhow much you care and how much
you submerge yourself into thecommunity and your knowledge
within your career field.
Stacey Ray (27:21):
I'm a crazy sales guy.
I love the cold call stuff.
I don't like the.
I don't like the hey, smile anddial kind of situation, but I
love to walk up, introducemyself to a business owner that
I do not know and try to talk tothem about how we can work
together.
Um, those little.
(27:43):
I don't care if it's a one carauto policy.
I still feel excited aboutclosing that deal.
I think one of the things thatwe also forget is sharing each
other's victories.
Right, that's a big one whenyou're doing great.
I want to celebrate yourvictory Right when I know that
(28:08):
you and Hildy have hit certainmilestones in your business or
changes in life, and otherbusiness owners, photographers
or whomever they've hit certainmilestones Celebrate their
victory.
That makes you feel good too.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (28:24):
I think I didn't learn that and I'm so
guilty of it.
You've called me on it.
You've got I don't know howmany times you've called me on
it, but it's you call me on it.
You're right.
When you get to those certainmilestones, you get through a
certain season or a certain areaof growth, you're starting to
get mature.
You should start celebrating itand I think there's a part of
(28:47):
me and I say this because justsharing with it, with, with
whoever's listening is I'mguilty of not celebrating those
victories because I'm afraid ifI do that, I'm going to stop
working harder.
Stacey Ray (29:02):
Oh, I get it.
Yes, absolutely, and I can seethat and I think because we
always see that growth linedoing this, yeah, and that's
wrong.
It's up, it's down, it's up,it's down, it's up, it's down.
But if your trend is yourgrowth, right, if your trend is
moving forward, um, we laugh.
(29:23):
You know I'm up, they see me,I'm down, type deal.
It's the same thing in businessyou, you know we're up, we're
moving, we're going forward.
And then we take a littlesetback and then we keep going
forward.
People who say you got to give ahundred percent all the time.
I don't think that that's right.
I can give a hundred percentfor x amount of time, right, and
(29:46):
then sometimes I gotta take abreath.
Or sometimes you get beat downa little bit and you go beat up
the punching bag or run laps orcall duane and that kind of
stuff, but then you got to getback into it and you have to
have this community of peoplearound you saying kick you out
the door, right, get out of yourchair, get up, what are you
(30:09):
doing?
Don't be stagnant.
Helping one another.
Not be stagnant is a big dealtoo.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (30:15):
You mean like stagnant, like running out of
gas on the crate turnpike andhaving to call you?
I don't know what you'retalking about.
That happened.
This is my insurance guy.
This is my buddy, but my trucklied to me, okay, I just want to
make sure that that's clear.
It said that there were manymore miles left in the gas tank,
and it was amazing because thefirst person I thought of was
(30:37):
you, and not because I knowyou're going to make fun of me
from now on, but because my wifewas in the passenger seat and I
needed someone who was going toshow up quick.
Otherwise that's detrimentalfor my future with her.
But thank you for doing that.
That showed a whole lot ofcharacter, too, in who you are,
(30:59):
and I know you don't do thatjust with me.
Your phone is always on, isn'tit?
I mean, it's always on becauseof your job, not not just that,
because of your heart.
Uh, you're plugged in.
You're always listening to seeand make sure that everyone that
you've met is doing okay.
Does does that ever?
I mean, like you said, youcan't go a hundred percent all
(31:21):
the time, but you got to takethose breaks.
Stacey Ray (31:24):
That's where my wife helps me in a lot of ways.
She, you know, she can see itin me as well of how about put
your phone on silent?
How about um during these hours?
Then you know people got tocall twice, um, or they won't
get through.
You know that kind of stuff andyou, you do have to have some
(31:49):
of those limits.
I'm not real good with thoselimits, and so I've got a
teammate and she helps methrough those and you know, when
she has her timeframes or herissues or whatever, you know we,
we work, work on that, but itreally is my, my wife, it's my
friends who see what's going on.
(32:10):
It's.
You know, that whole be stilland know that be still part is
difficult for me.
If you know me in any way, Idon't sit down really well and I
do.
It's selfish for me, though,doc.
It is selfish for me to helpyou.
I get a lot out of it, um.
(32:31):
I've had clients call me in themiddle of a crazy snowstorm
because their car was stolen,trying to help somebody.
I remember carl, yeah, yeah,but you get something out of it.
I have that story for the restof my life.
Yeah, I will hold this gas tapething over you for the rest of
your life.
But it's really.
It meant a lot to me that youwould feel like you could reach
(32:56):
out and call me.
To me that's a home run and Ithink, if I am that person, that
somebody is in need and theythink, man, let me call Stacy, I
bet he'll be there, you're thatguy, I will want to be that guy
.
But I want to be on that top ofmind as well.
I want to have thatrelationship with people that
(33:20):
when there is a there's a needwhere they're not that I can
always meet it or be there.
But to be that person thatpeople feel confident in, to me
that's a victory and I get a lotout of that.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (33:35):
And I want to ask a little bit deeper
question.
Oh, don't go too deep.
I'm not that smart, I get it.
We're army.
I can't go that deep.
I don't have too deep.
I'm not that smart, I get it.
We're army.
I can't go that deep, I don'thave that depth.
But it's more of the.
The Lord is a pivotal and he'spivotal in our lives in every
(33:56):
aspect.
I know over the years, that'salways been what I've seen in
you, by, by your, your example,your testimony.
It's always let's listen to theLord about it, let's take it to
the Lord, let's pray about it.
And I know, with what you do,the little bits that you share,
you see a lot of trauma, you seea lot of tragedy, a lot of
(34:20):
people that are broken, and whatyou bring to the table, I know
is a testimony as well.
You, you have a great platform,um.
It's not a fun one, because itworks with a community that's
sometimes in devastation, butit's.
It's necessary to have someoneshow up that um is a believer,
(34:41):
has a, has faith, has hope, andyou're shining a bright light
that sometimes people areattracted to, but they may not
know exactly what that is.
How do you talk?
Are you able to always talk toindividuals about your belief
system, about your faith, do youalways find?
(35:04):
I mean, obviously you have tobe spirit-led in this, you can't
just you know, wow, your tirefell off and your car turned
into a tripod.
Stacey Ray (35:12):
Oh God did that! You know what.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (35:14):
God's here for you.
It's got to be a conversationpiece that they're ready to hear
.
Stacey Ray (35:20):
That's very, very true and sometimes you know I
had to learn that over the yearsbecause and there were certain
stages in my life that I wasn'tconfident enough to say I'm
doing great because God put mein this position, that I want to
be the light in the darkness.
I want to be the saltiness sothat people see God through me.
(35:43):
But I had to make thatreflection because I am not
perfect.
If you know me in any way.
I fail.
I have my own issues.
I ask God every day to forgiveme.
But my first prayer when I getto my office and a lot of times
I'm there early by myself isclose my eyes and thank God for
(36:06):
the business that he gave me andthen ask send people to me that
I can help and they'd be readyto help.
But you know when, when greatthings happen, you know you
thank God that that happened.
When bad things happen, you'vegot God and you've got family to
(36:28):
lean back on and if you don't,we'll help you.
That's it.
If you don't have thatopportunity, you know we've
prayed with some people that weknow are going through some
really bad stuff and it doesn'tmean that this because this life
sucks.
I don't care what anybody saysyou're.
We are not promised to haveperfect any this or grandiose
(36:50):
rainbows and sunshine all thetime, but if our long-term
thought process is I've gotheaven out there waiting for me,
let's get as many people to gowith us, then what can you do
from there?
Right is not try to tell peopleabout it, but hold yourself
accountable to you.
Know, I've I've made somechanges in my life because of
(37:14):
maybe I'm not showing that lightthat I wanted to show, and we
kind of go back to that of um,when you talk to somebody, and
it's a habit that you have tobuild, because it's not easy to
say, oh, you know, I'm soblessed, and people say, oh,
you're doing great, you're doingthis.
Well, god has really blessed me,or my life has been blessed.
(37:35):
You have to make that a habitof life.
Yeah, and make those changes,because most of the time we're
going to go.
Yeah, man, that was me, did it?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (37:47):
Did it changes, because most time we're
gonna go yeah, man, that was me, did it.
Well, I think that's thenatural reaction.
Is it until you?
Stacey Ray (37:50):
I think until you're cocky don't get me wrong, we're
cocky in a lot of ways yes, Iam, so with what?
You didn't get to be dr duanebogus by not having talent and
those kind of things well andand a lot of that was stepping
into a lot of fear too.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (38:06):
Oh, yes, Right, I mean, that's the
valleys that we walk through.
Like you said, there's a lot oftragedy out there.
People are going through it andwe see them.
There's a reason that we canidentify with them.
It's because we didn't alwayshave everything put together.
We didn't always understandthat there's a lesson, that
there's things to learn fromthis.
There's a testimony in the lifethat we have and the challenges
(38:27):
we have.
He said it's a testimony andit's a mindset too.
You have to see that.
Stacey Ray (38:38):
Do you think it's?
I think it's easier to talkabout some of these things when
it comes to our daily walk andour Christian life and that kind
of stuff, when you've had thosebad things.
You know, heidi had cancer, wehad multiple miscarriages 2019,
she died in my arms for someissues, I mean.
But you use those situations torelate to people who maybe
(39:01):
haven't gone through that in thepast and are now going through
it.
Now we have friends who havefamily members who are going
through some really bad stuff.
It's not if something's goingto happen, it's when, but then
how do you get through it?
And then how do you use that tobless somebody else later on?
(39:22):
How do you use your tragedythat's going on in your life to
bless somebody else and helpthem get through that bad time?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (39:30):
I think that there's a part of your heart,
you know, we know biblicallyyour heart's changed when you
believe.
When you hear the word, whenyou hear the gospel, your heart
is actually changed.
You see it in people'sperspective.
You see it, their light startsto shine in a different way,
(39:50):
those tragedies that they hadpreviously become a part of
their voice.
And I really like that.
You pointed that out, becausehow do you shine that light on
someone when they're goingthrough a tragedy?
And I think that there's anunspoken language.
I said this with Nathan.
I call it heart talk.
(40:11):
It's where someone's goingthrough a problem and you're
like you're going to get throughthis.
I've seen this before, I knowthis personally.
You don't want to override whatthey're going through.
You don't want to take thatfrom them, nor could you, but
you don't.
You just you want them to knowthat you understand because
(40:31):
you've been in that season.
Stacey Ray (40:33):
I think we fail sometimes to think that we have
to come up with the right answer, right, right.
When somebody's like you know,I've had a heart attack, I'm
going to have to have a triplebypass, I'm having to do all
these other kind of things, Iwant to come out with some nice
little quip and easy saying ofooh, everything's going to be
just fine, right?
(40:55):
Well, it may not, that's right.
It may not, and sometimes youneed to let people vent through
their problem and talk throughtheir problem.
Yes, it's a bad situation, yes,there is a potential bad
outcome.
So what?
That's where you go back tothat Ephesians chapter 6, where
(41:15):
we're talking about the helm ofsalvation.
If I have heaven, knowing thatheaven is waiting for me, if you
were to pass away tomorrow, Iwould bawl and cry my eyes out
because I'll miss you, but I'llalso rejoice because I know
where you're going, I knowwhat's going to happen.
I think we kind of fall back,though, on those answers of you
(41:40):
know something really bad ishappening and I've got the right
thing to say.
I don't always have the rightthing to say.
I know I don't either.
You know something really badis happening and I've got the
right thing to say.
I don't always have the rightthing to say.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (41:48):
I know I don't either, you know, with
patients that come in?
I don't.
I've searched for it.
What's the right combination?
Sure, but it's not there.
The only one that can actuallygive you that right combination
is the Holy Spirit, his timingat that right time.
But there's a little bit ofwisdom that comes along with not
having the right answer.
Sometimes silence is the bestanswer, or just being there.
(42:12):
That's a hard thing for me too,isn't it?
Yeah, I mean, you can ask mywife.
I never shut up.
I'm trying to find the wordsall the time, but it doesn't
work.
I'm learning that.
But we grow right.
I'm learning that.
And many times when I'm out ofwords, we have individuals in
our life that take our breathaway with what they're going
(42:32):
through.
It's traumatic.
They're individuals that we seeas a part of the fabric of our
community and sometimes all wecan do is reach out and hold
their hand.
Stacey Ray (42:43):
You know, look back into some of the bad times that
you've had in your life and someof the things that people have
said that they were truly intheir heart trying to say the
right thing.
It was just a train wreck whenHeidi was going through cancer.
There was some things that wehad heard from very close
friends and we were like somethings that we heard from very
(43:07):
close friends and we were like,go back and listen to what you
said.
Is that truly what you mean?
Is that truly where we want to?
But there again, we're tryingto give a good answer and you
also, when you're going throughthose bad times, you have to
have that open heart of thesepeople are trying to be good.
These people are trying to helpus out yeah, we all fail at
(43:29):
that, don't we?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (43:30):
come on, we do.
Well, is there anything, anyadvice that you would give?
As far as being a businessowner, being a family man, what
are three good things that youcould give to a young family
member and someone who'sstarting their own business?
(43:51):
They've got a child on the way.
How would you I mean, you haveyour children are.
Stacey Ray (43:59):
Mean and ornery kids , these crazy kids.
Yeah, you're right, they'revicious.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (44:03):
So sweethearts, the one of them,
anyway.
The other one is just awesome.
Like crazy kids yeah, you'reright, they're vicious.
So, sweethearts, one of them,anyway.
The other one is just awesomeActs like a mama.
Yeah, that's right, heidi, I'msorry.
So what kind of advice wouldyou give to an entrepreneur, a
young person with a familythat's getting started?
Stacey Ray (44:18):
Ask God every morning to bless you and thank
God every night for thoseblessings that he sent Number
one every day.
You've got to do that and again, keep that in your mind.
Don't quit when you start abusiness.
If you don't give yourselfthree years and give yourself
the ability to fight througheverything that goes on for
(44:40):
three years, I'm not making anychanges.
I'm not doing anything crazy.
I'm not buying crazy capitalstuff.
Give yourself three years to getyour business and give you the
experience to be a businessowner, cause it's difficult when
you jump out as a newentrepreneur.
It's difficult.
And then three, surroundyourself with people who are
(45:03):
smarter than you and who want tohelp each other get through
life.
If you don't build that team ofother business owners or other
professionals in whatever you doI don't care if you're selling
vacuums door to door find themost successful person and
emulate what they do.
Just be smart enough to listento what they say Great advice,
or dumb enough to do what theytell you they do.
(45:24):
Just be smart enough to listento what they say Great advice,
or dumb enough to do what theytell you to do.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (45:29):
There's always that.
There's always that.
Well, thank you.
Thank you for your time today.
I appreciate you giving me theopportunity.
Stacey Ray (45:35):
You're an amazing person.
This is a pretty cool setup.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (45:38):
Well, I've got to learn from you it's
pretty cool, and what you doyour family.
You, it's pretty cool and whatyou do your family.
You guys are a great testimonyfor the community too.
I appreciate that.
Thank you, my pleasure.
Till next time.
Thank you for joining us again with Balancing
Life and Medicine.
We're here with Stacey Raycovering some major topics as
far as where we fit in thecommunity, how we tie into it
when we face adversity, and hownot to quit, to keep moving
through and having God in ourlife, that support, that
foundation, when things aregoing great and when they're
(00:24):
going bad, how we grow throughthose with the Lord at our side,
all right.
With that being said, we'regoing to get right.
Get into it, stacey.
(00:45):
What is it that got you intoinsurance?
I mean you're you seriouslywant that story?
Well, I do, because the part ofus that has joined together as
far as being veterans, militarymindset, community-driven,
(01:08):
service-driven what is it that Imean?
I got out of the military and Ithought how can I make the most
money possible and survive?
And you came out of it verydifferent.
I was single.
You had a family.
You still do have a family.
So with that I mean you.
You were thinking long-termfoundations, community.
Talk to me a little bit about,like what military years into
(01:31):
farmer's insurance in that nextchapter of service.
Stacey Ray (01:35):
You know, it was kind of a blended deal because
you go active duty and then Ialso got off of active duty,
couldn't stay out long, join thereserves, right, got sent over
as a individual mobilizationaugmentee, which is basically
the army could put me as aninstructor wherever they wanted,
(01:56):
nice, but as a reservist, youknow, I was still.
I was having to work and again,our whole thought process I
think we're raised that way ofjust what is the thing that's
going to make you the most money, right, how?
And then, as a, as a husband,um, I had, you know, young kids.
Um, how do I, you know, bringhome the most money?
(02:20):
What's the most stable?
You know, stable is always abig deal, um, and I was in, as
you know, I was in the medicalum arena for a long time.
I sold high-end digitalradiography um and radiology
equipment, focused mainly in thedental arena, but, but
(02:45):
basically helped dentists andhelped dental schools make more
money type deal, and that was asecure type thing.
But I was always working forsomebody else, right?
Can I take off for this?
Can I go to my child's event?
Can I do this type of deal?
And you're always, when you'rein that arena, you're always
(03:07):
working for somebody else andthe back of my mind was always
um, and I'm using the wordalways a lot, but the back of my
mind there was that thoughtprocess of I want to work for
myself.
You know, I see theentrepreneurs out there.
It's scary about it.
And finally, there were somethings that were going on in the
(03:32):
job that I had prior and wewere praying and asking God to,
you know, open doors that needto be open and close those that
need to be closed.
God to open doors that need tobe opened and close those that
need to be closed.
And some of those were closeddirectly on my nose as I was
(03:53):
trying to force my way throughthe door and I had a great
friend that we had known formany years who kept saying
Stacey, Heidi, you should starta farmer's business, look at
having your own agency, start anagency, planting a seed,
Starting.
And that was the door thatstayed open, right.
And then another opportunity.
And you know, when I say westarted with a small business, I
(04:17):
mean, if some people are givena plant, we were given a seed.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (04:24):
So all the way from the root system.
Stacey Ray (04:25):
That's right you know, and we stopped.
We started in as Heidi and Iworking together.
We have worked together everyday for the last nine years.
That lucky lady you know hasbeen a part of this whole thing,
but that's really kind of howit started.
It went from being thatcorporate life to wanting to
(04:48):
have my own business andsomething that was ours.
To God put this in our path.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (04:54):
And there's a lot there to unpack too, isn't
there?
I mean because I know myexperience coming out of the
military.
There was a structure, themilitary, there was a structure.
And then you know, I got to seeso many different as you did as
well so many different familiesthat came apart during that
process of transitioning, and itspeaks a lot to your character
being able to make thosetransitions, put different hats
(05:16):
on and then start to develop abusiness from the roots, from
the seed, essentially with thefamily you're bringing along on
this trip.
I mean, your wife is amazing,your kids are amazing.
It doesn't mean that you didn'tget bumps and scrapes along the
way, but there's a recovery thatyou guys were able to do and
(05:38):
are always able to do.
It seems like to this day.
You know, with navigating life,the pitfalls of it.
But the part I want to unpackis what really kept your mind in
the game, because I've seen somany people pull the plug and
say I don't want to do this,especially from the military,
because we're hitting a brickwall and I don't think a lot of
(06:02):
civilians understand how muchstructure is given to us a job,
our uniform, everything's given.
Our family even knows theirstructure is there.
So to jump out of one fryingpan into literally a fire troop,
because the civilian worldwants to tear you apart and you
are focused mostly on money.
(06:23):
You have to be, because that'sthe goal is to feed everybody.
Stacey Ray (06:28):
I mean, there's no fallback of moving into the
barracks, right, you know it was.
It was a strange.
You brought up uniform and Iwas going to say that how weird
was it, when you got out of themilitary, that you had to pick
out your clothes every day?
Oh, right, and you had to looknice, you had to fit in.
(06:48):
You had to change that style Imean, this wavy, beautiful hair
wasn't always right Every sevendays.
You know, you get that haircuttype of thing and it is that
structure.
And then you know, as an NCO oras a a leader, you got to be
ahead of the game, right, it'snot that you're going to be just
(07:10):
following along.
You have young lives that arelooking up to you as well, and
you know it's the same thingwith our business.
So, um, if I didn't make it, myfamily don't need it.
Right, if we don't go out and Ithink that that was the big
charge of it's not that I don'twant to, it's that I have to
(07:35):
I've got to go out, I've got tolearn as much as I can, I've got
to start closing deals, I'vegot to and the fact that I
really enjoyed what we're doing,because it's more of a
protection thing.
What I do is we protectfamilies.
I think that, carried over froma lot of this stuff, as far as
I'm protecting my family, I'mprotecting my friends.
(07:57):
Same thing with, you know,military to civilian transition
of we're protecting people.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (08:04):
Yeah, but what I see you doing is now
you're protecting, like suburbsand cities and communities.
I mean because you're part ofso many different networks too,
right?
Oh yeah, I mean you got your hatand so many different things
(08:25):
and I try to imagine becausegetting to see your kids grow,
recently married, you knowthere's all kinds of moving
parts in there.
You and your wife have beenpretty much able to go through
all these changes and show yourchildren how to do it.
No one's perfect but topersevere, to keep going and
also to stay plugged into acommunity that you know needs
you.
How do we balance that?
(08:47):
I mean, like I know there's atime as an entrepreneur when
you're waiting for that seed tosprout.
Stacey Ray (08:55):
And it's like come on, take off.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (08:56):
This has got to go, and that pressure that
you have to deliver, but yet youalways.
You have a love for people.
It's not just people.
Stacey Ray (09:05):
It's not just people .
Dr DeWayne Baugus (09:05):
It's like the community, and that also
reflects a really stablemarriage.
It may be rocky for all of usin our marriage at times, but
there's a stability there thathas withstood so much change.
And where do you like farmers?
You started that a few yearsago.
Now it seems like you'rerunning an empire.
Stacey Ray (09:28):
I wish that that was the case, and if empire is out
there, that's fine.
I hope that that comes.
It's more along the lines of Ihave a great team right there is
.
I have a great team of otherbusiness owners right.
Um, I don't buy leads, I don'tdo that kind of stuff.
All of our growth, a lot of it,is organic by relationships.
(09:52):
I hope that when, just likethis business, right, if I was
to walk in here and Dr Dart wasthrowing the horse needles at me
and I didn't feel like Iconnect with you, well, why
would I come back?
I think it's the same thing inany business.
You know that first year, gosh,you're just trying to put the
(10:16):
wheels on the cart.
Right, you got the plans butthe cart's not even rolling.
The second year, finally,you're trying to get it to roll.
That third year you've got somemomentum and you've got the
bumps and bruises from themistakes that you made and with
my wife and now my son workingwith us in the agency, it was
(10:39):
just kind of a naturalprogression.
And, yes, there were a lot oftimes when we were like we were
making nothing compared to whatwe were doing in the you know
the medical uh side of things toshift.
You know how do you, how do youtransition from there and is it
worth it?
Just go get a job, getinsurance and everything else
that comes along, medicalinsurance and that kind of thing
(11:00):
.
But you, you know, and we prayeda lot, we had a lot of people
that supported us.
My friend up in Collinsville,Wilbur Lee, and Tara Tucker,
were instrumental in guiding us.
I was just smart enough to dowhat they told me to do in a lot
of ways right.
And we, you know, we've beenblessed.
(11:24):
God has put this in our pathand I truly think that if he
takes it out of our path, thenwe'll be successful there too.
And I think, kind of going backto some of that military thing
too, is don't quit, right, right, that's not an option.
There's not an option.
You can't quit, you don't wantto quit.
(11:44):
You've seen other people quitbut I'm not going to be that
person.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (11:48):
That's always in the back of your mind, isn't
it?
To just go back and get anotherjob somewhere else, oh yeah.
Stacey Ray (11:53):
I get offers all the time.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (11:54):
Yeah, I would imagine.
I mean, your personality fitsso many different lanes, so many
different career fields, but Ithink your heart is in service
your way, not managed by someoneelse.
I mean, obviously, heidimanages you, thank you, thank
you, thank you so much.
We all Tulsa knows.
(12:15):
So with that, though, yourheart has to be in it, and
that's something I got todiscuss with our buddy, nathan.
Is that connection with people?
Oh, yeah, and I think that thatdoes come from military service
.
There's a connection that yougain with strangers, right, it's
like strangers within the unit,they automatically become
(12:36):
family, and I think that that'skind of what we're looking for
as veterans when we get out,there's another family to plug
into, to have a purpose when weget out there's another family
to plug into to have a purpose.
Stacey Ray (12:48):
Well, didn't we do that with Little League Baseball
, with high school sports?
If you're doing individualsports, then that's one thing.
You're leaning on your ownskills or whatever.
I think, when we're able to,because if you know anything
about me, it's about the team,it's not me, it's not just Heidi
, it's our, the people that wesurround ourselves with.
(13:09):
Um, when I you were talkingabout, uh, you take a beating
every now and again because theinsurance industry or any
business, right, you see peopleat their best and helping and
things have gone the absolutebest.
You see people in a situationwhere it's the worst, and
sometimes it's the worst day oftheir lives and you're helping
(13:33):
them through that.
But it's not always the rightoutcome or the best outcome that
they wanted.
You help them through that aswell and you help them through
that as well.
And when I do get down and takethat beating, and you know me,
I'm up, walking around, I'mtalking.
I don't sit down to talk on thephone.
(13:54):
It's bugging me, even just sathere.
You know me.
I want to jump up and walkaround and talk, but it's about
the community and it's about ourfriends and I can call people
like you and say or you know,stacy, I can sit in your eyes,
what's going on?
And we have those conversations.
You decompress the, thepunching bag gets worked over at
(14:19):
the house quite a bit.
But then you again, what elsecould I be doing?
I'm blessed at what I'm doing,I'm thankful for what we um, for
what we have and um.
But everybody's got their baddays and we just kind of yeah
roll with those punches and tryto get back into it regroup,
yeah, regroup and and and keepgoing forward with it.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (14:41):
I know and there's, as we just kind of went
over, there's many differentthings that you could do, but I
don't know that I could see youshine any brighter than how you
shine with your wife workingwith insurance.
I mean, I get to see itfirsthand, my wife and I.
I mean you're the first one togive me the talk of oh so you've
(15:02):
got your own business.
I mean because you guys werethere at that time and now
everybody thinks that you'rerich, the rich business owner,
which is completely, you knowit's upside down.
You know, if you, if you, ifyou see a giant skyscraper, just
turn it upside down, we're atthe bottom of that, like um
starting over.
But the perspective of otherslooking from from the outside in
(15:25):
is it can be dangerous.
It can be dangerous for you canmake you a target for the
public who doesn't understand,or people who are just out there
trying to take.
And it was interesting becausewe've had insurance companies
work with us before.
But there was a lack ofpersonal touch.
In fact, I thought I knewinsurance.
(15:45):
I didn't.
My education on insurance waswell.
Let me just say I didn't evenhave my notebooks for pre-K.
As far as understanding thedepth of insurance, that needs
to be understood as a businessowner, and you were able to take
that time with both my wife andI and say, look, you guys need
to be covered and this is howyou do it.
(16:07):
But you didn't just say that.
You explained it.
You explained the dynamics ofthe public, the entrepreneur,
the business owner, the targetsthat you become and how people
can sneak into your life and howactually it seems like the
system is made for that.
You have to have someone likeyou.
We have to have someone likeyou on our team because, as a
(16:31):
physician, there's so manythings that can go wrong and
people can twist things andattorneys can twist things and
lawsuits can into, and thenyou're just like you said.
You see people when they'redoing great, but the next week,
if they're not set up andprotected by insurance by a
passionate individual likeyourself that's covering every
(16:51):
basis, next week they can begone it truly can be.
Stacey Ray (16:55):
Look at the storms that we've had over the last
couple weeks here in our areatornadoes, um.
In a lot of ways, you know it'sum.
It can be frustrating whenyou're um, when you're starting
out and when you're getting withpeople and you're talking about
new opportunities, especiallywith business and, like you said
, we are the rich businessowners but they don't see us
(17:18):
taking out the trash.
They don't see us trying to getthe fax machine working.
They don't see us.
Everything else that we have todo is the nug right.
Everything else that we have todo is the nug right, so the
chief gnome running aroundtrying to get everything done,
(17:38):
you know, so that the doors canopen on the business and
maintain it.
Customer service is a big deal.
I think that's why you and Imesh so well along with these
other things.
Is it's really about customerservice?
How do you give somebody thetype of service that you would
want to in our industry?
In a lot of ways, customerservice is dead right.
Yes, it's always the phone call.
(17:59):
Hey, my name is Stacey Ray.
We would like to sell youinsurance.
I can be five dollars cheaperthan my competitor, but what is
it going to cost you to savethat $5 if there's an accident,
what's the total amount ofout-of-pocket that can be?
And I had to learn that too ofwhere are the and I use this
(18:32):
analogy, I think even with youand Ildi is where are the gaps
in the armor, right?
I mean, where are thosepotential holes that somebody
can get into and and take fromyou?
And then you know what are wecomfortable with?
Our own potential umco-insurances, right?
Or our own potentialout-of-pocket expenses?
Am I okay with a thousanddollar bad day because I backed
into the, you know, the mailboxor whatever?
Okay, I get that, yeah.
But I'm not okay with a tenthousand dollar back day because
(18:56):
I went from x amount ofcoverage to liability only and
now I have to replace thevehicle.
If you don't build thatrelationship with the business
owner, if you don't build thatrelationship with the business
owner, if you don't rebuild thatrelationship with your customer
, then you don't know wheretheir pain points are at,
because you, the amazing richguy that you are, you know you
(19:20):
could probably just write acheck for it and everything
would be just fine.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (19:24):
I don't know that I could do that If someone
was to do something like that.
My job is I am supposed to beso, like you said, customer
service, bedside manner,comforting, relaxing.
I use acupuncture needles everyday.
If I come in enraged I may hurt.
No, I wouldn't hurt anybody.
But that changes my touch.
(19:44):
Touch.
How are you today?
You know, yeah, that's so, it'sno, I don't bring that into
work, but you're part of mysecurity in my business.
I don't have to think aboutthat stuff and I know you do
that for so many in thecommunity as you bring that
comfort and they can go to workand focus on them because you do
(20:05):
what you do and I know you'vegot to realize the depth of that
.
I hope you do, but it isbecause of that that customer
service.
Stacey Ray (20:16):
You do unto others as you want to have done to
yourself, correct, and the wholegolden rule.
I was not always that guy.
In a lot of ways it was abouthow can I get my next paycheck
and what I need to be, and beinggone from the family and
traveling and everything elsethat went along with that.
(20:36):
But when you start gettingthese gray things on the side of
your head gray hair andeverything else there is some
wisdom that comes through.
You know, maybe that wasn't asimportant.
There is some wisdom that comesthrough.
You know, maybe that wasn't asimportant.
And seeing my son and mydaughter and my wife go through
the different things in theirdaily lives and being there with
them, I'm telling you peoplelaugh and I know you hear this
(20:58):
too.
People laugh that I work withmy wife every day for the last
nine years and survive marriedwith my best friend.
Right same thing with you andildy is everything sunshine and
rainbows.
No, it's not, but you'reholding yourself together.
You're holding each othertogether down the path of life.
(21:18):
And when I'm frustrated and mad, heidi goes seriously let it go
, let's move on from there.
And it's the same thing whenshe's, you know, wanting to rage
about somebody else.
You have that partner there tosay OK, vent to me, reflect,
(21:42):
regroup and let's, let's moveforward.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (21:44):
Yeah, dust yourself off and let's, let's
move forward.
Stacey Ray (21:46):
yeah dust yourself off and let's keep going.
Well, yeah, and I, I use, youknow, that same friendship with
you and with some of my other umbusiness owners that we, you
know, we, we meet with and talkto of we're on an island in a
lot of ways, right in our dailylives.
Um, you have said this too.
If we don't have that time tocome together and kind of you
(22:08):
have said this too if we don'thave that time to come together
and kind of vent about some ofthose things or you know, the,
the, the, me too, gripe typethings, oh, I've seen it and we
talk about customers that we'vehad issues with and then we
laugh and we move on and we goback.
But sometimes it's the like Isaid earlier.
DeWayne, what's going on, doc?
How are you doing?
I can see you're tired in youreyes.
(22:29):
What's happening If you don'thave those relationships and
those people in your lives, likeNathan, like some of the other
people that you've talked to?
We cannot make this throughalone.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (22:42):
No, no, alone .
No, no, I want to.
I want to switch directions alittle bit, because that those,
how those relationships develop,um, they're intricate and they
get whittled down over time.
You see the real relationships,the real individuals in the
community and you see those thatkind of drift away, but as a as
a business grows and you seeother people grow, cause you're
(23:05):
growing as a community too,absolutely.
I know when we first met eachother it was over five years ago
, was it Six years?
Six years?
Yeah, I've got way more graysince I met you, so just knowing
there's more to be worriedabout.
Yeah, prettier, that's what mywife tells me.
So, anyway, she's encouraging,I love her.
(23:26):
I'm not going to adjust for aminute yet, but as we grow in
the community and our businessesgrow together, what we start to
see is a certain look like yousaid, picking each other up,
encouraging each other, becausewe know that being surrounding
(23:48):
ourself with those individualsis always going to keep us
encouraged as well.
It's that buddy check, it's,it's it's sticking in there and
going I, how are you today?
And I know many times you'vesent me a buddy check text.
And it's, it's buddy check,cool, and what you love, and
don't say that word.
I know based on that usuallyyou're checking in because you
(24:08):
need someone to check in to Verytrue, we reflect that.
You're right.
That's necessary, I think withthe networking groups that's one
of the core things I wish Icould see more entrepreneurs
grow out of the networkinggroups and become those pillars
and stand alone, because they'renot really standing alone.
(24:31):
They're always coming back andtied to us.
Stacey Ray (24:34):
Well, there's a responsibility.
I mean, you're several years inyour business growth, yeah, and
there is that fast rise.
There's the plateau.
Sometimes there can be adecline and then going back and
refocus.
But there's a responsibility inour community, like you were
(24:54):
talking about earlier of okay,I've hit a certain point.
How can I give back?
Yeah, how do I reach out toother people?
I think one of the greatestcompliments you could ever have
is somebody to say I see whatyou're doing and where you are.
Can you help me get there Right?
(25:16):
And then sometimes it's likewhat you don't see are all the
bumps and the bruises andeverything else that you have to
deal with.
Let's talk about getting downthat path and everything else
that you have to deal with.
Let's talk about getting downthat path and then that reach
out, that hand up out of thehole when you find that
opportunity to mentor and lead.
(25:39):
If you're not taking thoseopportunities, I think that you
will absolutely fail.
Because if you can teach me asa business owner or you can
remind yourself of oh, this ishow I got there, that's a daily
reflective of, okay, I got sogood at doing that that I went
on to doing something else andforgot how to keep myself going.
(26:01):
When you teach somebody, you'rereminding them and you're
reminding yourself.
You're teaching yourself again.
How do I stay successful?
That humbling.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (26:10):
True, that humbling.
I was discussing that withNathan as far as how do you stay
humble and that was the samekind of response he had was you
have to remind yourself, youhave to get back to your
foundations, you have to helppeople grow and give back.
And when it comes to business,I've had this question in my
(26:33):
mind for probably the last.
I'm short-minded, so about sixminutes.
So what I'm wondering is atwhat point did we stop having to
make those cold calls?
Because we went through thosegrowths in business, we had to
make those cold calls, we had tocall back, we had to follow up,
which we still do.
But getting through thatawkward phase to the point now
(26:57):
where people are coming in,people are being referred to you
because you're in the community, you're known.
How long that season of growthis, I think, is really dependent
on your personal character andhow much you care and how much
you submerge yourself into thecommunity and your knowledge
within your career field.
Stacey Ray (27:21):
I'm a crazy sales guy.
I love the cold call stuff.
I don't like the.
I don't like the hey, smile anddial kind of situation, but I
love to walk up, introducemyself to a business owner that
I do not know and try to talk tothem about how we can work
together.
Um, those little.
(27:43):
I don't care if it's a one carauto policy.
I still feel excited aboutclosing that deal.
I think one of the things thatwe also forget is sharing each
other's victories.
Right, that's a big one whenyou're doing great.
I want to celebrate yourvictory Right when I know that
(28:08):
you and Hildy have hit certainmilestones in your business or
changes in life, and otherbusiness owners, photographers
or whomever they've hit certainmilestones Celebrate their
victory.
That makes you feel good too.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (28:24):
I think I didn't learn that and I'm so
guilty of it.
You've called me on it.
You've got I don't know howmany times you've called me on
it, but it's you call me on it.
You're right.
When you get to those certainmilestones, you get through a
certain season or a certain areaof growth, you're starting to
get mature.
You should start celebrating itand I think there's a part of
(28:47):
me and I say this because justsharing with it, with, with
whoever's listening is I'mguilty of not celebrating those
victories because I'm afraid ifI do that, I'm going to stop
working harder.
Stacey Ray (29:02):
Oh, I get it.
Yes, absolutely, and I can seethat and I think because we
always see that growth linedoing this, yeah, and that's
wrong.
It's up, it's down, it's up,it's down, it's up, it's down.
But if your trend is yourgrowth, right, if your trend is
moving forward, um, we laugh.
(29:23):
You know I'm up, they see me,I'm down, type deal.
It's the same thing in businessyou, you know we're up, we're
moving, we're going forward.
And then we take a littlesetback and then we keep going
forward.
People who say you got to give ahundred percent all the time.
I don't think that that's right.
I can give a hundred percentfor x amount of time, right, and
(29:46):
then sometimes I gotta take abreath.
Or sometimes you get beat downa little bit and you go beat up
the punching bag or run laps orcall duane and that kind of
stuff, but then you got to getback into it and you have to
have this community of peoplearound you saying kick you out
the door, right, get out of yourchair, get up, what are you
(30:09):
doing?
Don't be stagnant.
Helping one another.
Not be stagnant is a big dealtoo.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (30:15):
You mean like stagnant, like running out of
gas on the crate turnpike andhaving to call you?
I don't know what you'retalking about.
That happened.
This is my insurance guy.
This is my buddy, but my trucklied to me, okay, I just want to
make sure that that's clear.
It said that there were manymore miles left in the gas tank,
and it was amazing because thefirst person I thought of was
(30:37):
you, and not because I knowyou're going to make fun of me
from now on, but because my wifewas in the passenger seat and I
needed someone who was going toshow up quick.
Otherwise that's detrimentalfor my future with her.
But thank you for doing that.
That showed a whole lot ofcharacter, too, in who you are,
(30:59):
and I know you don't do thatjust with me.
Your phone is always on, isn'tit?
I mean, it's always on becauseof your job, not not just that,
because of your heart.
Uh, you're plugged in.
You're always listening to seeand make sure that everyone that
you've met is doing okay.
Does does that ever?
I mean, like you said, youcan't go a hundred percent all
(31:21):
the time, but you got to takethose breaks.
Stacey Ray (31:24):
That's where my wife helps me in a lot of ways.
She, you know, she can see itin me as well of how about put
your phone on silent?
How about um during these hours?
Then you know people got tocall twice, um, or they won't
get through.
You know that kind of stuff andyou, you do have to have some
(31:49):
of those limits.
I'm not real good with thoselimits, and so I've got a
teammate and she helps methrough those and you know, when
she has her timeframes or herissues or whatever, you know we,
we work, work on that, but itreally is my, my wife, it's my
friends who see what's going on.
(32:10):
It's.
You know, that whole be stilland know that be still part is
difficult for me.
If you know me in any way, Idon't sit down really well and I
do.
It's selfish for me, though,doc.
It is selfish for me to helpyou.
I get a lot out of it, um.
(32:31):
I've had clients call me in themiddle of a crazy snowstorm
because their car was stolen,trying to help somebody.
I remember carl, yeah, yeah,but you get something out of it.
I have that story for the restof my life.
Yeah, I will hold this gas tapething over you for the rest of
your life.
But it's really.
It meant a lot to me that youwould feel like you could reach
(32:56):
out and call me.
To me that's a home run and Ithink, if I am that person, that
somebody is in need and theythink, man, let me call Stacy, I
bet he'll be there, you're thatguy, I will want to be that guy
.
But I want to be on that top ofmind as well.
I want to have thatrelationship with people that
(33:20):
when there is a there's a needwhere they're not that I can
always meet it or be there.
But to be that person thatpeople feel confident in, to me
that's a victory and I get a lotout of that.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (33:35):
And I want to ask a little bit deeper
question.
Oh, don't go too deep.
I'm not that smart, I get it.
We're army.
I can't go that deep.
I don't have too deep.
I'm not that smart, I get it.
We're army.
I can't go that deep, I don'thave that depth.
But it's more of the.
The Lord is a pivotal and he'spivotal in our lives in every
(33:56):
aspect.
I know over the years, that'salways been what I've seen in
you, by, by your, your example,your testimony.
It's always let's listen to theLord about it, let's take it to
the Lord, let's pray about it.
And I know, with what you do,the little bits that you share,
you see a lot of trauma, you seea lot of tragedy, a lot of
(34:20):
people that are broken, and whatyou bring to the table, I know
is a testimony as well.
You, you have a great platform,um.
It's not a fun one, because itworks with a community that's
sometimes in devastation, butit's.
It's necessary to have someoneshow up that um is a believer,
(34:41):
has a, has faith, has hope, andyou're shining a bright light
that sometimes people areattracted to, but they may not
know exactly what that is.
How do you talk?
Are you able to always talk toindividuals about your belief
system, about your faith, do youalways find?
(35:04):
I mean, obviously you have tobe spirit-led in this, you can't
just you know, wow, your tirefell off and your car turned
into a tripod.
Stacey Ray (35:12):
Oh God did that! You know what.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (35:14):
God's here for you.
It's got to be a conversationpiece that they're ready to hear
.
Stacey Ray (35:20):
That's very, very true and sometimes you know I
had to learn that over the yearsbecause and there were certain
stages in my life that I wasn'tconfident enough to say I'm
doing great because God put mein this position, that I want to
be the light in the darkness.
I want to be the saltiness sothat people see God through me.
(35:43):
But I had to make thatreflection because I am not
perfect.
If you know me in any way.
I fail.
I have my own issues.
I ask God every day to forgiveme.
But my first prayer when I getto my office and a lot of times
I'm there early by myself isclose my eyes and thank God for
(36:06):
the business that he gave me andthen ask send people to me that
I can help and they'd be readyto help.
But you know when, when greatthings happen, you know you
thank God that that happened.
When bad things happen, you'vegot God and you've got family to
(36:28):
lean back on and if you don't,we'll help you.
That's it.
If you don't have thatopportunity, you know we've
prayed with some people that weknow are going through some
really bad stuff and it doesn'tmean that this because this life
sucks.
I don't care what anybody saysyou're.
We are not promised to haveperfect any this or grandiose
(36:50):
rainbows and sunshine all thetime, but if our long-term
thought process is I've gotheaven out there waiting for me,
let's get as many people to gowith us, then what can you do
from there?
Right is not try to tell peopleabout it, but hold yourself
accountable to you.
Know, I've I've made somechanges in my life because of
(37:14):
maybe I'm not showing that lightthat I wanted to show, and we
kind of go back to that of um,when you talk to somebody, and
it's a habit that you have tobuild, because it's not easy to
say, oh, you know, I'm soblessed, and people say, oh,
you're doing great, you're doingthis.
Well, god has really blessed me,or my life has been blessed.
(37:35):
You have to make that a habitof life.
Yeah, and make those changes,because most of the time we're
going to go.
Yeah, man, that was me, did it?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (37:47):
Did it changes, because most time we're
gonna go yeah, man, that was me, did it.
Well, I think that's thenatural reaction.
Is it until you?
Stacey Ray (37:50):
I think until you're cocky don't get me wrong, we're
cocky in a lot of ways yes, Iam, so with what?
You didn't get to be dr duanebogus by not having talent and
those kind of things well andand a lot of that was stepping
into a lot of fear too.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (38:06):
Oh, yes, Right, I mean, that's the
valleys that we walk through.
Like you said, there's a lot oftragedy out there.
People are going through it andwe see them.
There's a reason that we canidentify with them.
It's because we didn't alwayshave everything put together.
We didn't always understandthat there's a lesson, that
there's things to learn fromthis.
There's a testimony in the lifethat we have and the challenges
(38:27):
we have.
He said it's a testimony andit's a mindset too.
You have to see that.
Stacey Ray (38:38):
Do you think it's?
I think it's easier to talkabout some of these things when
it comes to our daily walk andour Christian life and that kind
of stuff, when you've had thosebad things.
You know, heidi had cancer, wehad multiple miscarriages 2019,
she died in my arms for someissues, I mean.
But you use those situations torelate to people who maybe
(39:01):
haven't gone through that in thepast and are now going through
it.
Now we have friends who havefamily members who are going
through some really bad stuff.
It's not if something's goingto happen, it's when, but then
how do you get through it?
And then how do you use that tobless somebody else later on?
(39:22):
How do you use your tragedythat's going on in your life to
bless somebody else and helpthem get through that bad time?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (39:30):
I think that there's a part of your heart,
you know, we know biblicallyyour heart's changed when you
believe.
When you hear the word, whenyou hear the gospel, your heart
is actually changed.
You see it in people'sperspective.
You see it, their light startsto shine in a different way,
(39:50):
those tragedies that they hadpreviously become a part of
their voice.
And I really like that.
You pointed that out, becausehow do you shine that light on
someone when they're goingthrough a tragedy?
And I think that there's anunspoken language.
I said this with Nathan.
I call it heart talk.
(40:11):
It's where someone's goingthrough a problem and you're
like you're going to get throughthis.
I've seen this before, I knowthis personally.
You don't want to override whatthey're going through.
You don't want to take thatfrom them, nor could you, but
you don't.
You just you want them to knowthat you understand because
(40:31):
you've been in that season.
Stacey Ray (40:33):
I think we fail sometimes to think that we have
to come up with the right answer, right, right.
When somebody's like you know,I've had a heart attack, I'm
going to have to have a triplebypass, I'm having to do all
these other kind of things, Iwant to come out with some nice
little quip and easy saying ofooh, everything's going to be
just fine, right?
(40:55):
Well, it may not, that's right.
It may not, and sometimes youneed to let people vent through
their problem and talk throughtheir problem.
Yes, it's a bad situation, yes,there is a potential bad
outcome.
So what?
That's where you go back tothat Ephesians chapter 6, where
(41:15):
we're talking about the helm ofsalvation.
If I have heaven, knowing thatheaven is waiting for me, if you
were to pass away tomorrow, Iwould bawl and cry my eyes out
because I'll miss you, but I'llalso rejoice because I know
where you're going, I knowwhat's going to happen.
I think we kind of fall back,though, on those answers of you
(41:40):
know something really bad ishappening and I've got the right
thing to say.
I don't always have the rightthing to say.
I know I don't either.
You know something really badis happening and I've got the
right thing to say.
I don't always have the rightthing to say.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (41:48):
I know I don't either, you know, with
patients that come in?
I don't.
I've searched for it.
What's the right combination?
Sure, but it's not there.
The only one that can actuallygive you that right combination
is the Holy Spirit, his timingat that right time.
But there's a little bit ofwisdom that comes along with not
having the right answer.
Sometimes silence is the bestanswer, or just being there.
(42:12):
That's a hard thing for me too,isn't it?
Yeah, I mean, you can ask mywife.
I never shut up.
I'm trying to find the wordsall the time, but it doesn't
work.
I'm learning that.
But we grow right.
I'm learning that.
And many times when I'm out ofwords, we have individuals in
our life that take our breathaway with what they're going
(42:32):
through.
It's traumatic.
They're individuals that we seeas a part of the fabric of our
community and sometimes all wecan do is reach out and hold
their hand.
Stacey Ray (42:43):
You know, look back into some of the bad times that
you've had in your life and someof the things that people have
said that they were truly intheir heart trying to say the
right thing.
It was just a train wreck whenHeidi was going through cancer.
There was some things that wehad heard from very close
friends and we were like somethings that we heard from very
(43:07):
close friends and we were like,go back and listen to what you
said.
Is that truly what you mean?
Is that truly where we want to?
But there again, we're tryingto give a good answer and you
also, when you're going throughthose bad times, you have to
have that open heart of thesepeople are trying to be good.
These people are trying to helpus out yeah, we all fail at
(43:29):
that, don't we?
Dr DeWayne Baugus (43:30):
come on, we do.
Well, is there anything, anyadvice that you would give?
As far as being a businessowner, being a family man, what
are three good things that youcould give to a young family
member and someone who'sstarting their own business?
(43:51):
They've got a child on the way.
How would you I mean, you haveyour children are.
Stacey Ray (43:59):
Mean and ornery kids , these crazy kids.
Yeah, you're right, they'revicious.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (44:03):
So sweethearts, the one of them,
anyway.
The other one is just awesome.
Like crazy kids yeah, you'reright, they're vicious.
So, sweethearts, one of them,anyway.
The other one is just awesomeActs like a mama.
Yeah, that's right, heidi, I'msorry.
So what kind of advice wouldyou give to an entrepreneur, a
young person with a familythat's getting started?
Stacey Ray (44:18):
Ask God every morning to bless you and thank
God every night for thoseblessings that he sent Number
one every day.
You've got to do that and again, keep that in your mind.
Don't quit when you start abusiness.
If you don't give yourselfthree years and give yourself
the ability to fight througheverything that goes on for
(44:40):
three years, I'm not making anychanges.
I'm not doing anything crazy.
I'm not buying crazy capitalstuff.
Give yourself three years to getyour business and give you the
experience to be a businessowner, cause it's difficult when
you jump out as a newentrepreneur.
It's difficult.
And then three, surroundyourself with people who are
(45:03):
smarter than you and who want tohelp each other get through
life.
If you don't build that team ofother business owners or other
professionals in whatever you doI don't care if you're selling
vacuums door to door find themost successful person and
emulate what they do.
Just be smart enough to listento what they say Great advice,
or dumb enough to do what theytell you they do.
(45:24):
Just be smart enough to listento what they say Great advice,
or dumb enough to do what theytell you to do.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (45:29):
There's always that.
There's always that.
Well, thank you.
Thank you for your time today.
I appreciate you giving me theopportunity.
Stacey Ray (45:35):
You're an amazing person.
This is a pretty cool setup.
Dr DeWayne Baugus (45:38):
Well, I've got to learn from you it's
pretty cool, and what you doyour family.
You, it's pretty cool and whatyou do your family.
You guys are a great testimonyfor the community too.
I appreciate that.
Thank you, my pleasure.
Till next time.
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