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https://www.youngmengrowing.org/event-details/black-male-teen-summit-2025
The Young Men Growing Mentor Program is hosting a leadership summit on April 19th at Cuyahoga Community College. Gary Hicks Sr. is transforming lives one young man at a time. As founder and CEO of Young Men Growing, his mission pulses with urgent purpose: to shift how young men see themselves from "just kids" to "growing men" with responsibilities and purpose.
What happens when a rebellious young man is given the tough love, guidance, and mentorship needed to transform his life? Gary Hicks, founder and CEO of Young Men Growing, takes us on his powerful journey from resistance to revelation.
Gary shares how being uprooted from Cleveland to Tennessee to live with his father changed the trajectory of his life. Though he fought against it initially—getting expelled from school and kicked off basketball teams—this foundation of hard work and accountability became the bedrock of his approach to mentoring young men today. "My father would hire me every morning and fire me at the end of the day," Gary recalls, a lesson in responsibility that shaped his character.
Basketball became Gary's lifeline, providing structure and opportunity when he needed it most. But the real transformation came during college when a simple question about God's existence led to a profound spiritual awakening that redefined his purpose. Today, Gary channels these experiences into Young Men Growing, focusing on five critical areas: leadership development, financial literacy, education, social-emotional learning, and community engagement.
The conversation delves into one of Gary's most powerful principles: "Maturity does not begin with age, but with the acceptance of responsibility." Through this lens, he guides young men to embrace their circumstances and take ownership of their lives, regardless of their youth. His approach addresses modern challenges like technology dependence and the struggle with stillness, while emphasizing the critical role of male leadership in families and communities.
Most moving is Gary's reflection on his personal legacy—loving God and family above all else. "I care to see a young man smile, I care to see a woman who, when they have a good man, they smile and carry themselves different," he shares, revealing how true mentorship creates ripple effects across generations.
Want to support this important work? Join the Young Men Growing connect at youngmengrowing.org to learn how you can help build the next generation of leaders.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Be A Baller where we're building a
lifelong legacy for our families, communities and the world.
Your host, coach Tim Brown, isexcited for you to join him on
this journey.
On each episode, we'll betalking about how to be
intentional about building alasting legacy.
We'll be exploring what itmeans to leave a mark that goes
(00:22):
beyond just our lives but has apositive impact on those around
us and even generations to come.
So if you're looking forinspiration, guidance and
practical tips on how to build alasting legacy that makes a
difference, then you're in theright place.
So grab your earbuds, getcomfortable and let's dive in.
It's time to be a baller.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Welcome to Be A Baller podcast where we explore
what it means to build alifelong legacy that impacts
your family, community and theworld.
I'm your host, coach Tim Brown,and today we have an incredible
guest who's dedicated his lifeto empowering young men to
become leaders and young men ofgood character.
Please welcome Gary Hicks,senior intervention, specialist,
(01:07):
mentor and CEO and founder ofYoung Men Growing.
Gary, thanks for joining theshow.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Hey man, thank you for having me.
Man, I'm excited.
Man, I couldn't even sleep lastnight.
Man, I was ready for this.
I'm excited.
Hey, listen to all yourpodcasts, listen to all your
sessions in your podcast, man.
Listen the brothers you had onhere, man, I'm excited.
I really feel privileged.
Man, thank you for thisopportunity.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Oh no, this is my pleasure, my pleasure.
Yeah, before we get deep intothis, I want you to talk about
your annual Young Men Gathering,your leadership conference, in
April.
Can you talk about the visionof that and the impact?
Is this a third year, fourthyear of the conference?
Speaker 3 (01:47):
It's actually going to be.
Actually it's our second yearof doing it.
It's our second time doing it,and the vision is man.
One of our pillars is communityengagement, and so my
organization is selection-based.
You have to go through anapplication process and we
choose, once a year, a new groupof guys or adding to who we
(02:08):
already have in our organization, and so part of our program,
our curriculum, is teachingthese guys how to reach out to
the community, and so weunderstand as an organization
that we're not going to be ableto take everybody in, but this
is our part to show thecommunity like we care about you
.
We see you and we hear you, andso we want to provide you with
(02:30):
information that we give to ourguys on a regular basis, and so
we try to open up our arms andtry to do our best to give
Everybody who attends from thecommunity outside of the
Cuyahoga County to come in andhear about this, this work that
we're doing for our youngbrothers.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And so I'm sorry, no go ahead.
No and.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
I was just going to say man, it's really a passion
of ours to really I wish wecould take everybody in, man,
but if we could, just if we havesome young brothers in the seat
who hear something impactfuland then they start going on
their journey.
Man, we're doing our part.
So yeah, that's the mindsetbehind it this year's theme uh,
(03:10):
can you talk?
about this year's theme, I gotexcited.
Yeah, um, only your journeybuilds your future.
Really, basically, what we'resaying is being intentional
about who you're gonna be as aman.
Um, intentionality is somethingbig that we are really harping
on our boys to really buy into.
And intentionality means likeyou have a plan, you have a
strategic approach of how you'regoing to become the man that
(03:31):
you see yourself, that you wantto be.
And I tell people, man likeSuperman ain't coming.
So you got to put the work in.
And whoever you envisionyourself you want to be rich,
you want to be powerful, youwant to be respected.
When you walk into a room, youwant your presence to open up a
door for you.
So when you start talking,people are prepared to receive
what you say.
Then you've got to start doingthe work, and the work is
(03:55):
serious.
It's a process that we talkabout and so, on your journey,
build your future.
It's that in mind, trying toget the guys to understand that
you have to be purposeful aboutwho you're going to be, and
you've got to put that work in.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Put that work in.
I hear that a lot now.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Put that work in You've got to put that work in.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
You're getting around that you know you talk about
growing up.
I know you were born inCleveland but you were raised in
Tennessee, in Knoxville, withyour dad.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
Can you talk about that experience, man?
You know what All these years,man, I'm 46 and and I always
tell people, man, as an educatorI felt like I didn't choose
education.
Education chose me, and when Iwas in the fourth grade, my
father lived in Tennessee and Ilive with my mom and my
(04:44):
grandmother.
My grandmother passed away atthe beginning of the stages of
my fourth grade year in school,and so my mom and my dad made a
decision and my father came inand picked me up out of
Cleveland and took me toTennessee to live with him, and
it was probably like three yearsago.
Tim, where I looked at my dadand my father is a brick mason.
(05:06):
My father owns his own business, so he laid brick man and
that's what he did.
He's a, he's a master builderand one day he was teaching my
son how to hold a trialcorrectly.
He did it in so much detail.
I step back and I'm like that'swhere I get it from.
I get the education to teachand like every time I try to do
(05:27):
something, I try to take my ownexperience and try to get the
next guy to do it better than Icould, and so that's right.
Here is my son.
Actually, the photo that yousee is my son and young man
growing is based off my father.
My father would take all myfriends and because he had his
own business, he would have usworking on that clay, red dirt,
(05:53):
building those scalpels, makingthat mud, carrying those 12
center blocks, man and settingup stuff.
And my father had a saint man.
My father would hire me everymorning and fire me at the end
of the day, and so everyeverything of who I am and how I
move and how I interact withpeople is really sparked from my
father.
So I hated it.
I hated the fact that my dadcame and got me.
(06:13):
I hated the fact that I wasn'twith my family, because I live
with my mom and my aunt and them, and they catered to me like
women.
You know what I'm saying.
I was the only baby boy in thefamily at the time and, to be
honest with you no disrespect toanybody in my family I'm still
the only man in my family and soyou got to understand I was
getting catered to.
But when I moved with my father, I didn't get catered to, I got
(06:37):
chastised and I was like no boy, you're going to be a man and
I'm going to show you how to bea man.
I'm going to show you how towork with these hands.
Are you going to work withthese hands or are you going to
go to school?
And I was like, nah, man, Ican't be out here in no
100-degree weather.
I'm going to school pops.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I'm going to school.
I understand.
Back in the day you were quitean athlete.
Can you describe?
You talk about the impact ofsports coaches in your life and
the life lessons you learnedfrom them?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Yeah, man, I've had quite a few of them.
One that really two guys thatstood out to me was Bill Brown
and Brian Houston.
They had two differentpersonalities but they loved the
game so much and for me,basketball saved my life,
meaning that I was.
I was talented at it enoughwhere people, even when I made
(07:29):
mistakes, they still spend timewith me and try to get me to
understand that I got it.
I got it, figured this out, andI tell people I'm not ashamed
of it, man, I got expelled frommiddle school because I was so
rebellious, because my fathercame and got me.
I just wanted to figure out away how to get back to Cleveland
.
I got expelled from middleschool.
My eighth grade year, ninth,10th, 11th grade, I got kicked
(07:52):
off my basketball team everyyear for fighting, just not
complying.
And then, going into my juniorsenior year, something just
finally clicked and I just triedto show that I cared a little
bit more, and so basketballsaved me, it helped me, and so
academically I wasn't that guyOn the court.
(08:13):
I was that guy, butacademically I wasn't that guy.
So I was forced to go Jucoroute, like a lot of us, and so
going through that Juco route, Ireally had to do some internal
searching, and so basketballgave me that time to kind of
work on some things I needed towork on, and so when the
opportunity came for me to go tomy four-year school man which
(08:35):
is a whole I was telling youthat story.
That's where it was a pivotalmoment in my life.
It allowed me to make somedecisions that created and
created who I am today.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
You know during that time college and that experience
can you talk about the rolethat faith played in your life
and how you came to the Lord?
Speaker 3 (08:56):
Yeah, so you know how they say like you know you
could take somebody fromsomewhere, but they're going to
still have the same.
They're going to have the samebehaviors and same characters,
right?
And so all the bad habits thatI learned in Tennessee, trying
to rebel and trying to get myfather to send me back to my mom
.
When I finally had theopportunity to come back home my
(09:17):
freshman year after college, Icome back home and so not
ashamed to say it now, man, Igot into some law trouble
because I was doing some stuffthat I shouldn't have been doing
.
I think I could get awaybecause I'm an athlete and so.
So I was never a believer toomuch.
I went to I grew up in theSouth, so you know it's Bible,
(09:37):
bible Belt, you know what I'msaying.
And I went to Amy's Zion and Iused to go to sleep and snore in
the back of the pews and I wasan acolyte and I had the white
Catholic kind of thing on and Iwas an acolyte and I had the
white catholic kind of thing on.
I carried the lamp and I wasstanding on the left or the
right side of the pastor whilehe was preaching.
I would fall asleep up thereand my father would go off on me
.
I used to, I used to, um, Iused to, when I didn't acolyte
(09:59):
and I was sitting in the back, Iwould sneak and go to the candy
store across the street, nevercome back until it was time to
come back and I made a vow, vow.
I said man, when I get grown Iain't never going to church.
Man bump this stuff.
And so you know God is funny.
He got his plan.
And so when I end up choosing aschool that I wanted to go to,
which was California Universityof Pennsylvania and that was all
(10:20):
by God's design my future wifeand my wife is the person who
led me to Christ.
We started off on oneconversation.
I said if God is such thisgreat God, why is all this evil
in the world and why I got to gothrough the things I'm going to
, and why am I struggling somuch?
And at that point I was in astate of depression because life
(10:42):
was just not working out for mein my favor.
I had my knees start going badon me and I just couldn't play
like I wanted to.
And so I really came to Christ,really just asked him to fix me
so I can go back and do what Iwanted to do.
And I asked her that onequestion.
I went to church.
That one time you can't tell menothing, tim.
I was at, I was banged head, Iwas like I went to church,
whatever.
And then I gave my life toChrist my junior year in college
(11:05):
, when I turned 19, and he justflipped me all the way around
and so a lot of this stuff righthere, this young man growing,
we believe, is really comingfrom the center of who I am as a
person.
I'm really trying to get theyoung man to understand, like
basketball or any sports, youplay is a wonderful thing, but
(11:25):
it can't be your end and goalidentity.
Play is a wonderful thing, butit can't be your end and goal
identity.
You have to understand that youwere created for more than just
dribbling a basketball,throwing a football, throwing a
baseball, running track.
You have a higher purpose.
And so when we talk about, webelieve, it's not so much that I
need to believe in you, it's somuch that you need to believe
in yourself to the point where Ibelieve in you.
You know what I mean, and sothat's where we come from.
(11:46):
With that, that's good.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
You know what I mean, and so that's where we come
from with that.
That's good you know.
With over 20 years ofexperience in education, youth
development and athletics, youbuild a reputation as a
passionate advocate for youngmen.
Can you share with the audiencewhat sparked your passion for
working with this particular agegroup?
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, me working in.
I started off in high school.
I worked at a high school andwhen I worked at the high school
, I worked at a high school andand when I worked at the high
school I was a head basketballcoach, had a really good run and
so, but my guys were getting inso much trouble, man, like you
know, like I had one guy almoststab a guy to death.
I had another guy who had to belocked up and all this other
(12:26):
stuff.
But every time they would getin trouble him, they would be
like and I'm just a kid and I'mlike scratching my head okay,
you are making grown mandecisions, right, and I'm like
man.
No, I mean, you're a young man,and that's where the name young
man, growing come from, becausethat's the baseline of what we
talk about.
We try to change this mindsetof thinking.
Because you are 13, 14, 14, 15years, you are a kid and the
(12:50):
world don't look at you like nokid and they look at you like
grown man and they'll throw youon that ground, lock you up,
separate you from your family.
And so the first thing we talkabout is changing this mentality
of like you are not a kid, youare wrong.
You are growing into a grownman, and so you've got to move a
certain way.
And so that's where my passioncomes from.
(13:11):
And then, going back to mybiblical upbringing and
understanding the scriptures man, the most important character
in the Bible, the person in theBible, is the man, and so God
starts everything off with theman.
If you look in the scriptures,he said man, I'm calling all men
to the mountain so I can pourinto you, and then, when you,
when I pour into you, you goback to the family so that you
(13:33):
can sustain them.
And so, you know, we tell themin one of our, one of the things
that we have, we have astatement of dedication, and the
one thing we talk about is youare, we are created to be
protected, we are created to beproviders.
That's what you're called to do, that's your calling.
Like, it's nothing else.
It's not about you, it's aboutyou serving others.
(13:54):
And so we try to get our youngmen to understand man, like, if
you understand, more will cometo you if you serve.
And so that's why it'simportant to me, and my passion
comes off of this, because Iunderstand the calling that God
has on every young man in thisworld, and that's the problem
that we're seeing in our society.
Man guys are forgetting theircalling, and so that's why we
(14:14):
have a high rate of young menand young women growing up
without their biological fatherin the home.
How is it that over 70 percentof our young people are growing
up without their biologicalfather?
in the home.
You feel what I'm saying likethat, that it's not an earth
thing, but it's just.
It's just a high concern on me,and so when I talk to my young
(14:36):
now I'm tapping into what I dolike you know what I'm saying
like that's.
And so, going back to why wetalk about the summit and the
things that we do, I'm trying toget these young men and our
single moms and our dads to likeyou got to understand me.
These young men got a callingon them.
You can't keep calling, youcan't keep protecting them.
(14:58):
They got to fall on their face.
That's the way I learn.
You know what I'm saying.
That's the way all of us guyswho buy into that concept, like
I'm going to step up and be aman, because, man, I know how
that concrete feel.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Right, Right, that's good.
That's good.
You know you emphasize in youngmen growing.
You emphasize leadershipdevelopment, financial literacy,
education, social, emotionallearning and community
engagement.
Can you elaborate on why theseareas are critical for young man
success?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
yeah, leadership is part of being a man like you
can't run away from it, likewhether you got kids, the family
, not if I'm in a marketplace,the one thing we start talking
about is also being competitivein the marketplace.
You know, I'm saying themarketplace could be your choice
of sport, corporate america,entrepreneurship, vocational
work, like that's Like you can'trun from leadership if you're a
(15:50):
man Like I love what JasonWilson said man like he's
another guy that's an advocateout of Detroit and I follow him
a lot.
He talks about man.
We are seeing men who are more,who are supposed to be lying,
who are grazing in the grassinstead of holding their head up
high saying choose me, I wantto go, I want to be that leader.
And the other component of thesocial emotional is like me
(16:13):
being an education and being anintervention.
The one thing I say is like ifI'm not settled in my body and
if I'm not, if I don'tunderstand who I am, it's
impossible for me to perform thebest outside of me.
The one thing I learned, tim,is like and God has shown me
this is like I want to bepresent, whether in good times
(16:33):
or bad times, because when I'mpresent I'm more valuable to
everyone around me, and so,whether I'm having fun or I'm
doing something that's hard.
I want to be, I want to bepresent, I want to be there.
And so when we talk about thatsocial emotional, we look at so
(16:53):
many young brothers, more youngbrothers, I think it's six out
of 10, almost seven out of 10are committing suicide.
Now, you know what I'm saying.
That was unheard of.
It's unheard of because thelack of male leadership to
remind them, like man, I tell myyoung man is it fair?
No, but it's what's required ofyou.
Like that's the difference ofleadership.
It's not fair sometimes that Igot to sacrifice something that
I want to do, but it's requiredof me.
(17:14):
You know what I'm saying.
It's required of me.
Like, every time I don't wantto Like, sometimes I just want
to go off and do my own thing,but I got my son next to me.
It's what's required of meevery time.
Like me and my wife get into it, I sometimes in my mind I won't
escape, but it's like, no, butwhat's what's required of me?
Every time I talk to somebodyand they deny and saying there's
(17:34):
no such thing as god or this, Igotta like learn how to stick
it.
Stick in that and say let metalk through this, let me figure
this out, this what's requiredof me, and so, um, it's just.
It's just what I understand,like, as that's what's required
of us is to step up and be therefor the people around us.
And so the leadership, thesocial, emotional, the community
(17:58):
engagement, like I said, we'recalled to serve, right.
And then the last part isfinancial literacy.
I tell my guys this, tim, it'slike, do these three things and
you'll be a powerful brother.
Number two put an anchor inyour spirituality.
And number three, financialliteracy Understand how money
(18:18):
works.
If you do those three things,you're going to listen, you're
going to control your narrativein this world.
You know what I'm saying and so, in short, because I could be
long with it, you know what I'msaying, you know what I mean,
that's where it comes from,that's real.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
One of your favorite quotes is, and I love this
maturity does not begin with age, but with the acceptance of
responsibility.
How do you see this principleplaying out in your work with
young men growing and that?
Speaker 3 (18:50):
quote came to me, man , when I was at my lowest point.
Tim and I came across that andI'm like, I read that maturity
does not begin with age, and sowe see a lot of brothers older,
they look older than 40, 50s andthey still have like the 20s
man.
I mean, you know, you playsports, you know how it is.
(19:11):
I go to the gym now do 45, 50.
I'm still trying to make it tothe league.
I'm still trying to make it tothe league.
I'm still trying to do this.
You know what I mean.
Or, dude, you got six babymamas and you still talking
about you can't find the rightone.
And like you know what I'msaying, Like you know what I
mean, it's just so many immaturethings, decisions that we're
making.
And so for me, when I see thatI'm trying to get our young men
(19:32):
to understand like, yeah, thesituation at home may not be the
best.
Yeah, life ain't working out howit's supposed to work out for
you.
But understand, maturity comeswith you accepting what's ever
in front of you.
Accept it right.
If you accept that, right there, you are maturing and you're
going in the route you're goingto, basically supposed to go to.
(19:55):
So it's about themunderstanding, like we talk
about understanding, like I lookat maturity like a mirror right
, and I feel like when brothersdon't accept maturity, they're
standing on sand sinking.
It's not a solid ground, butthat moment in my life where I
said, man, you know what, I'mnot perfect, I haven't done
(20:16):
everything right, but I'm goingto start today of trying to
change my life, that's when thatfirst step on the solid ground
began and you can start buildingwhat it is you're trying to
build.
But if you keep denying theresponsibility that's called to
you, you're not really standingon solid ground.
So it begins with maturity.
That's what it begins with.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
It's good you know as a, as a mentor, what advice
would you give to our audienceabout building meaningful
relationships with young peopleand empowering them to take
ownership of their lives?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
First thing, you got to remember that you was their
age at one point in time.
You got to remember that.
You got to accept that.
You know what I'm saying andyou have to understand that you
can't live vicariously throughthem.
Right, you had your turn, sonow it's their turn.
So you have to create, you haveto have, you have to be patient
Right, you have to.
(21:07):
Let's go back.
You have to be well yourself,so let's deal with that.
First, you know what I'm saying.
You got to be well.
So, if we're talking about, youwant to, you want to pour into
young man and you want to bethere for him, make sure that
you're right, make sure thatyour, your, your social,
emotional is balanced so thatwhen it's your time, you'll be
patient, you'll listen to himand I and I say this all the
(21:30):
time you will give them thegrace that they deserve Um and
that and and so then, when yougive them that grace they
deserve, then you're going tolet them know that you hear them
and that you see them, and sothen, when they do make mistakes
, you're going to remind them,like I'm not perfect, they're
not perfect, so let's walk thisthing out together.
And then I tell people, man,like I tell people about
(21:53):
marriage.
Like you know, you got to getthe manual.
There's some books out here.
You got to.
You got to educate yourself onthe things that are impacting
our young people so that you canuse the language that're using,
(22:16):
words that demonstrate to themthat you hear them and you care
about them.
Then they're going to open uptheir heart and they're going to
give you time and they're goingto give you respect to say,
okay, I'm going to listen towhat you're saying, you know
what I'm saying, so that's whatI would say to the audiences
those things right there.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
That's a good word, great word for mentors.
You know you've been working inthis space for decades.
You've seen hundreds of youngmen that you work with.
What are some?
You know times of change,actually, you know we've got the
cell phone and all the socialmedia.
What are some for thisgeneration?
What are some common themes orareas where they struggle the
(22:54):
most, and how would you help usin addressing those challenges?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
You said it right the cell phone technology.
You know just.
You know we tell young men allthe time, people all the time
like you got this device, youcan make money on it.
You know what I'm saying.
You could do so many things.
You can just go to it and getall the information.
Before we had to go to thelibrary, we had to come across
somebody.
But you know, the key thing tothis is Tim.
You got to be in the rightheadspace, you got to be
(23:20):
mentally mature to deal with it,right.
So you got to get them tounderstand and the parents to
understand, just because theyhad a cell phone.
And if they're not mentallymature, it's going to kick their
butt.
And so the one thing we try todo is try to get them to buy
into the fact that you got toseparate yourself and create
friction between you and thecell phone, right?
(23:41):
Um, that's one of the things.
The other thing is we, we tryto get them to understand.
Like you know, reading is keyman.
Like we try to get these guyslike you gotta, you gotta
discipline yourself to read abook.
You know I'm saying you know thesame.
You know, if you want to keepsomething from a black young man
.
Put it in a book.
You know what I'm saying.
Put it in a book, and so thoseare the things that you know,
(24:04):
that I've learned, and you knowthe same things you deal with.
It's nothing different thanwhat you're dealing with, it's
just.
I think it's just understandingthe language and trying to
understand them.
I think the, I think thecontent and the wisdom is still
going to be passed down fromgeneration, but it's just the
packaging of how you deliver itto them.
You know what I'm saying.
(24:25):
The same things I'm saying now.
You've probably said umpteentimes right, you know what I'm
saying, but it's just how wedeliver it to the young people.
Them cell phones is a monster,and so that's one of the biggest
things and also the one thingI've learned also, tim, is that
they don't like the citizens,they don't like quiet.
(24:45):
They don't like.
They don't like that stillnessand quietness because the cell
phone technology is alwaysreadily available.
So we really try to work withour young men in that social,
emotional space is to sit downand be still and listen to their
bodies.
One of the things about mentalhealth is like you got to learn
how to sit down and hearyourself, and hear what your
(25:05):
body and mind is saying, andthat's a very important space,
and so that's the one thing thatwe really try to harbor with
our young men is, like you gotto learn how to sit.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Still, what our young men is like you gotta learn how
to sit.
Still, it's good.
One thing that I've realized inthis, that I heard said this
way real change happens when thepeople who need it lead it.
Real change happens when thepeople who need it lead it.
You think about the change inthis country has got to be led
by young people.
You know they have to lead it.
You know you and I trying tofigure out the phones and what
(25:36):
all that, I don't know, I'm notreally that interested, but but,
but.
But you have some, some youngpeople who are sharing their
experience right now.
Right now, think about you, anathlete.
You know we're looking up tothat guy who's about two years
older than us.
You know we can't wait to belike him.
You know right right, watchingeverything he does.
And that's what these youngpeople, and that's what you're
(25:56):
building a generation of youngpeople that are those positive
peers, so to speak, those nearpeers, who are leading them in
that direction.
You know, as we come around thecorner, this is a legacy
podcast.
As you look back over your lifeand the things you've
accomplished thus far, whatlegacy is Gary Hicks?
A senior building.
What is your legacy?
What are you building?
Speaker 3 (26:18):
See, it's simple man, God, with all my heart, mind,
body and soul, and that I'mcalled to love my son, wife and
my daughter, and that's mylegacy.
It's nothing else.
No more, none less.
To leave a picture of, not aperfect man, but a man who will
(26:45):
cry when you ask him the rightquestion, a man who will get on
his knees and ask God, I don'tknow what to do.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know, I don't know.
But I know I love you and I lovemy family, and my legacy is
that I care for people.
I care, I simply care.
I care to see a young man smileand I care to see a woman who,
(27:08):
when they have a good man, theysmile, they carry themselves
different.
I care when I see my sonwalking in peace and grace and
walking with confidence in theroom because he sees dad do it.
I care about my daughter, youknow, sacrificing certain things
so that she can find a manwho's going to resemble her dad
(27:35):
and one of the proudest momentsfor me is that I never have
brought too much disappointmentto my mother's footstep.
She will never say that when shetalks about her son, her baby
she lights up.
That's my legacy and my fatherknows that.
I tell him I love you, pops.
I wouldn't be the man I amwithout you.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
That's it.
Wow, that's powerful.
That's a drop the mic momentthere.
That's good stuff.
That's great stuff.
One more time, can you telly'all how they can get involved
in Young Men Growing and howthey can contact you?
Would you mind sharing that forthe audience?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Absolutely so.
You can just simply go toyoungmangrownorg.
There you click on a link andyou can see our story.
We try really hard to make sureour website tells a story.
Also, when you click on it, youwill see the summit pop up.
The summit is Saturday, aprilthe 19th.
Doors open up at 9.30.
Registration Free continentalbreakfast.
We will provide lunch, we havedynamic speakers, giveaways and
we will have breakout sessionstalking about everything that
(28:47):
we're talking about here, and itwill be at Cuyahoga Community
College, at the Eastern Campusand Harvard area, harvard Park
area.
Yeah, and if you want to reachout to us, you can reach out to
us at youngmangrown, at Gmail.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
You know, one thing that I saw in there that was
really intriguing to me is theparent sessions.
How long do you have a parentsession?
As we wrap this up, what's thegoal of those parent sessions?
A lot of times we point at ayoung man and we have a lot of
mothers.
Just being honest, what's thegoal of those parent sessions?
Speaker 3 (29:26):
Yeah, man, me being in education man like you can
have the perfect classroom, youcan have really good, solid
classroom management, you canhave your young people engaged
and they're learning and growing.
But the buck stop when they gohome and if they don't have that
same type of atmosphere at home, if they're not seeing a mom or
dad or grandmama reading, theydon't see that they're having
(29:47):
quiet time.
They don't see, you know,spiritual growth being modeled.
They don't see, they don't hearconversation of real world
issues going on and talking itout.
They don't see.
They don't hear a conversationof real world issues going on
and talking it out.
They don't see the patience andgrace that they need to carry
themselves with, even the waythey dress, the way they walk
and how they introducethemselves.
They don't see those things.
It's like they're only gettinghalf the picture and typically
(30:10):
they're going to it's going tobe hard for them to make that
decision.
And so, going back to ourparents, we really try to buy
into our parents and get themlike if I get my parents to buy
in, the young man ain't got nochoice.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
But, dr Hicks, I want to thank you for being on the
show and appreciate your passion, your true passion for a young
man.
I can feel it through thescreen.
I'm sure everybody's listeningand feel and understand your
passion and now they know yourwhy All of us have to have a why
.
Listening and feel andunderstand your passion and now
they know your why All of ushave to have a why.
Now they know why you do whatyou do.
(30:42):
So I want to thank you forstanding the gap for so many
young men and just empoweringthose young men and families and
being that model for them.
This is Coach Tim Brown.
I want to thank our audiencefor listening to Be A Baller
podcast.
Be sure to subscribe and sharethis episode with others and, as
always, continue to build alifelong legacy.
Be a baller.
Thanks, gary, for joining us.
Appreciate you.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Thanks as well.
If you've enjoyed this episode,please share it with family and
friends.
The Be a Baller podcast isavailable on all major podcast
platforms.
This podcast was created byCoach Tim Brown and recorded and
edited by the video productionclass of Worthington Christian
high school.
Be sure to come back next weekas we continue to discuss on how
(31:26):
to build a lifelong legacy.
Until then, don't forget to bea baller.
Welcome to Be A Baller where we're building a
lifelong legacy for our families, communities and the world.
Your host, coach Tim Brown, isexcited for you to join him on
this journey.
On each episode, we'll betalking about how to be
intentional about building alasting legacy.
We'll be exploring what itmeans to leave a mark that goes
(00:22):
beyond just our lives but has apositive impact on those around
us and even generations to come.
So if you're looking forinspiration, guidance and
practical tips on how to build alasting legacy that makes a
difference, then you're in theright place.
So grab your earbuds, getcomfortable and let's dive in.
It's time to be a baller.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Welcome to Be A Baller podcast where we explore
what it means to build alifelong legacy that impacts
your family, community and theworld.
I'm your host, coach Tim Brown,and today we have an incredible
guest who's dedicated his lifeto empowering young men to
become leaders and young men ofgood character.
Please welcome Gary Hicks,senior intervention, specialist,
(01:07):
mentor and CEO and founder ofYoung Men Growing.
Gary, thanks for joining theshow.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Hey man, thank you for having me.
Man, I'm excited.
Man, I couldn't even sleep lastnight.
Man, I was ready for this.
I'm excited.
Hey, listen to all yourpodcasts, listen to all your
sessions in your podcast, man.
Listen the brothers you had onhere, man, I'm excited.
I really feel privileged.
Man, thank you for thisopportunity.
Speaker 2 (01:28):
Oh no, this is my pleasure, my pleasure.
Yeah, before we get deep intothis, I want you to talk about
your annual Young Men Gathering,your leadership conference, in
April.
Can you talk about the visionof that and the impact?
Is this a third year, fourthyear of the conference?
Speaker 3 (01:47):
It's actually going to be.
Actually it's our second yearof doing it.
It's our second time doing it,and the vision is man.
One of our pillars is communityengagement, and so my
organization is selection-based.
You have to go through anapplication process and we
choose, once a year, a new groupof guys or adding to who we
(02:08):
already have in our organization, and so part of our program,
our curriculum, is teachingthese guys how to reach out to
the community, and so weunderstand as an organization
that we're not going to be ableto take everybody in, but this
is our part to show thecommunity like we care about you
.
We see you and we hear you, andso we want to provide you with
(02:30):
information that we give to ourguys on a regular basis, and so
we try to open up our arms andtry to do our best to give
Everybody who attends from thecommunity outside of the
Cuyahoga County to come in andhear about this, this work that
we're doing for our youngbrothers.
Speaker 1 (02:44):
And so I'm sorry, no go ahead.
No and.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
I was just going to say man, it's really a passion
of ours to really I wish wecould take everybody in, man,
but if we could, just if we havesome young brothers in the seat
who hear something impactfuland then they start going on
their journey.
Man, we're doing our part.
So yeah, that's the mindsetbehind it this year's theme uh,
(03:10):
can you talk?
about this year's theme, I gotexcited.
Yeah, um, only your journeybuilds your future.
Really, basically, what we'resaying is being intentional
about who you're gonna be as aman.
Um, intentionality is somethingbig that we are really harping
on our boys to really buy into.
And intentionality means likeyou have a plan, you have a
strategic approach of how you'regoing to become the man that
(03:31):
you see yourself, that you wantto be.
And I tell people, man likeSuperman ain't coming.
So you got to put the work in.
And whoever you envisionyourself you want to be rich,
you want to be powerful, youwant to be respected.
When you walk into a room, youwant your presence to open up a
door for you.
So when you start talking,people are prepared to receive
what you say.
Then you've got to start doingthe work, and the work is
(03:55):
serious.
It's a process that we talkabout and so, on your journey,
build your future.
It's that in mind, trying toget the guys to understand that
you have to be purposeful aboutwho you're going to be, and
you've got to put that work in.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
Put that work in.
I hear that a lot now.
Speaker 1 (04:08):
Put that work in You've got to put that work in.
Speaker 2 (04:11):
You're getting around that you know you talk about
growing up.
I know you were born inCleveland but you were raised in
Tennessee, in Knoxville, withyour dad.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
Can you talk about that experience, man?
You know what All these years,man, I'm 46 and and I always
tell people, man, as an educatorI felt like I didn't choose
education.
Education chose me, and when Iwas in the fourth grade, my
father lived in Tennessee and Ilive with my mom and my
(04:44):
grandmother.
My grandmother passed away atthe beginning of the stages of
my fourth grade year in school,and so my mom and my dad made a
decision and my father came inand picked me up out of
Cleveland and took me toTennessee to live with him, and
it was probably like three yearsago.
Tim, where I looked at my dadand my father is a brick mason.
(05:06):
My father owns his own business, so he laid brick man and
that's what he did.
He's a, he's a master builderand one day he was teaching my
son how to hold a trialcorrectly.
He did it in so much detail.
I step back and I'm like that'swhere I get it from.
I get the education to teachand like every time I try to do
(05:27):
something, I try to take my ownexperience and try to get the
next guy to do it better than Icould, and so that's right.
Here is my son.
Actually, the photo that yousee is my son and young man
growing is based off my father.
My father would take all myfriends and because he had his
own business, he would have usworking on that clay, red dirt,
(05:53):
building those scalpels, makingthat mud, carrying those 12
center blocks, man and settingup stuff.
And my father had a saint man.
My father would hire me everymorning and fire me at the end
of the day, and so everyeverything of who I am and how I
move and how I interact withpeople is really sparked from my
father.
So I hated it.
I hated the fact that my dadcame and got me.
(06:13):
I hated the fact that I wasn'twith my family, because I live
with my mom and my aunt and them, and they catered to me like
women.
You know what I'm saying.
I was the only baby boy in thefamily at the time and, to be
honest with you no disrespect toanybody in my family I'm still
the only man in my family and soyou got to understand I was
getting catered to.
But when I moved with my father, I didn't get catered to, I got
(06:37):
chastised and I was like no boy, you're going to be a man and
I'm going to show you how to bea man.
I'm going to show you how towork with these hands.
Are you going to work withthese hands or are you going to
go to school?
And I was like, nah, man, Ican't be out here in no
100-degree weather.
I'm going to school pops.
Speaker 2 (06:56):
I'm going to school.
I understand.
Back in the day you were quitean athlete.
Can you describe?
You talk about the impact ofsports coaches in your life and
the life lessons you learnedfrom them?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
Yeah, man, I've had quite a few of them.
One that really two guys thatstood out to me was Bill Brown
and Brian Houston.
They had two differentpersonalities but they loved the
game so much and for me,basketball saved my life,
meaning that I was.
I was talented at it enoughwhere people, even when I made
(07:29):
mistakes, they still spend timewith me and try to get me to
understand that I got it.
I got it, figured this out, andI tell people I'm not ashamed
of it, man, I got expelled frommiddle school because I was so
rebellious, because my fathercame and got me.
I just wanted to figure out away how to get back to Cleveland
.
I got expelled from middleschool.
My eighth grade year, ninth,10th, 11th grade, I got kicked
(07:52):
off my basketball team everyyear for fighting, just not
complying.
And then, going into my juniorsenior year, something just
finally clicked and I just triedto show that I cared a little
bit more, and so basketballsaved me, it helped me, and so
academically I wasn't that guyOn the court.
(08:13):
I was that guy, butacademically I wasn't that guy.
So I was forced to go Jucoroute, like a lot of us, and so
going through that Juco route, Ireally had to do some internal
searching, and so basketballgave me that time to kind of
work on some things I needed towork on, and so when the
opportunity came for me to go tomy four-year school man which
(08:35):
is a whole I was telling youthat story.
That's where it was a pivotalmoment in my life.
It allowed me to make somedecisions that created and
created who I am today.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
You know during that time college and that experience
can you talk about the rolethat faith played in your life
and how you came to the Lord?
Speaker 3 (08:56):
Yeah, so you know how they say like you know you
could take somebody fromsomewhere, but they're going to
still have the same.
They're going to have the samebehaviors and same characters,
right?
And so all the bad habits thatI learned in Tennessee, trying
to rebel and trying to get myfather to send me back to my mom
.
When I finally had theopportunity to come back home my
(09:17):
freshman year after college, Icome back home and so not
ashamed to say it now, man, Igot into some law trouble
because I was doing some stuffthat I shouldn't have been doing
.
I think I could get awaybecause I'm an athlete and so.
So I was never a believer toomuch.
I went to I grew up in theSouth, so you know it's Bible,
(09:37):
bible Belt, you know what I'msaying.
And I went to Amy's Zion and Iused to go to sleep and snore in
the back of the pews and I wasan acolyte and I had the white
Catholic kind of thing on and Iwas an acolyte and I had the
white catholic kind of thing on.
I carried the lamp and I wasstanding on the left or the
right side of the pastor whilehe was preaching.
I would fall asleep up thereand my father would go off on me
.
I used to, I used to, um, Iused to, when I didn't acolyte
(09:59):
and I was sitting in the back, Iwould sneak and go to the candy
store across the street, nevercome back until it was time to
come back and I made a vow, vow.
I said man, when I get grown Iain't never going to church.
Man bump this stuff.
And so you know God is funny.
He got his plan.
And so when I end up choosing aschool that I wanted to go to,
which was California Universityof Pennsylvania and that was all
(10:20):
by God's design my future wifeand my wife is the person who
led me to Christ.
We started off on oneconversation.
I said if God is such thisgreat God, why is all this evil
in the world and why I got to gothrough the things I'm going to
, and why am I struggling somuch?
And at that point I was in astate of depression because life
(10:42):
was just not working out for mein my favor.
I had my knees start going badon me and I just couldn't play
like I wanted to.
And so I really came to Christ,really just asked him to fix me
so I can go back and do what Iwanted to do.
And I asked her that onequestion.
I went to church.
That one time you can't tell menothing, tim.
I was at, I was banged head, Iwas like I went to church,
whatever.
And then I gave my life toChrist my junior year in college
(11:05):
, when I turned 19, and he justflipped me all the way around
and so a lot of this stuff righthere, this young man growing,
we believe, is really comingfrom the center of who I am as a
person.
I'm really trying to get theyoung man to understand, like
basketball or any sports, youplay is a wonderful thing, but
(11:25):
it can't be your end and goalidentity.
Play is a wonderful thing, butit can't be your end and goal
identity.
You have to understand that youwere created for more than just
dribbling a basketball,throwing a football, throwing a
baseball, running track.
You have a higher purpose.
And so when we talk about, webelieve, it's not so much that I
need to believe in you, it's somuch that you need to believe
in yourself to the point where Ibelieve in you.
You know what I mean, and sothat's where we come from.
(11:46):
With that, that's good.
Speaker 2 (11:48):
You know what I mean, and so that's where we come
from with that.
That's good you know.
With over 20 years ofexperience in education, youth
development and athletics, youbuild a reputation as a
passionate advocate for youngmen.
Can you share with the audiencewhat sparked your passion for
working with this particular agegroup?
Speaker 3 (12:03):
Yeah, me working in.
I started off in high school.
I worked at a high school andwhen I worked at the high school
, I worked at a high school andand when I worked at the high
school I was a head basketballcoach, had a really good run and
so, but my guys were getting inso much trouble, man, like you
know, like I had one guy almoststab a guy to death.
I had another guy who had to belocked up and all this other
(12:26):
stuff.
But every time they would getin trouble him, they would be
like and I'm just a kid and I'mlike scratching my head okay,
you are making grown mandecisions, right, and I'm like
man.
No, I mean, you're a young man,and that's where the name young
man, growing come from, becausethat's the baseline of what we
talk about.
We try to change this mindsetof thinking.
Because you are 13, 14, 14, 15years, you are a kid and the
(12:50):
world don't look at you like nokid and they look at you like
grown man and they'll throw youon that ground, lock you up,
separate you from your family.
And so the first thing we talkabout is changing this mentality
of like you are not a kid, youare wrong.
You are growing into a grownman, and so you've got to move a
certain way.
And so that's where my passioncomes from.
(13:11):
And then, going back to mybiblical upbringing and
understanding the scriptures man, the most important character
in the Bible, the person in theBible, is the man, and so God
starts everything off with theman.
If you look in the scriptures,he said man, I'm calling all men
to the mountain so I can pourinto you, and then, when you,
when I pour into you, you goback to the family so that you
(13:33):
can sustain them.
And so, you know, we tell themin one of our, one of the things
that we have, we have astatement of dedication, and the
one thing we talk about is youare, we are created to be
protected, we are created to beproviders.
That's what you're called to do, that's your calling.
Like, it's nothing else.
It's not about you, it's aboutyou serving others.
(13:54):
And so we try to get our youngmen to understand man, like, if
you understand, more will cometo you if you serve.
And so that's why it'simportant to me, and my passion
comes off of this, because Iunderstand the calling that God
has on every young man in thisworld, and that's the problem
that we're seeing in our society.
Man guys are forgetting theircalling, and so that's why we
(14:14):
have a high rate of young menand young women growing up
without their biological fatherin the home.
How is it that over 70 percentof our young people are growing
up without their biologicalfather?
in the home.
You feel what I'm saying likethat, that it's not an earth
thing, but it's just.
It's just a high concern on me,and so when I talk to my young
(14:36):
now I'm tapping into what I dolike you know what I'm saying
like that's.
And so, going back to why wetalk about the summit and the
things that we do, I'm trying toget these young men and our
single moms and our dads to likeyou got to understand me.
These young men got a callingon them.
You can't keep calling, youcan't keep protecting them.
(14:58):
They got to fall on their face.
That's the way I learn.
You know what I'm saying.
That's the way all of us guyswho buy into that concept, like
I'm going to step up and be aman, because, man, I know how
that concrete feel.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Right, Right, that's good.
That's good.
You know you emphasize in youngmen growing.
You emphasize leadershipdevelopment, financial literacy,
education, social, emotionallearning and community
engagement.
Can you elaborate on why theseareas are critical for young man
success?
Speaker 3 (15:27):
yeah, leadership is part of being a man like you
can't run away from it, likewhether you got kids, the family
, not if I'm in a marketplace,the one thing we start talking
about is also being competitivein the marketplace.
You know, I'm saying themarketplace could be your choice
of sport, corporate america,entrepreneurship, vocational
work, like that's Like you can'trun from leadership if you're a
(15:50):
man Like I love what JasonWilson said man like he's
another guy that's an advocateout of Detroit and I follow him
a lot.
He talks about man.
We are seeing men who are more,who are supposed to be lying,
who are grazing in the grassinstead of holding their head up
high saying choose me, I wantto go, I want to be that leader.
And the other component of thesocial emotional is like me
(16:13):
being an education and being anintervention.
The one thing I say is like ifI'm not settled in my body and
if I'm not, if I don'tunderstand who I am, it's
impossible for me to perform thebest outside of me.
The one thing I learned, tim,is like and God has shown me
this is like I want to bepresent, whether in good times
(16:33):
or bad times, because when I'mpresent I'm more valuable to
everyone around me, and so,whether I'm having fun or I'm
doing something that's hard.
I want to be, I want to bepresent, I want to be there.
And so when we talk about thatsocial emotional, we look at so
(16:53):
many young brothers, more youngbrothers, I think it's six out
of 10, almost seven out of 10are committing suicide.
Now, you know what I'm saying.
That was unheard of.
It's unheard of because thelack of male leadership to
remind them, like man, I tell myyoung man is it fair?
No, but it's what's required ofyou.
Like that's the difference ofleadership.
It's not fair sometimes that Igot to sacrifice something that
I want to do, but it's requiredof me.
(17:14):
You know what I'm saying.
It's required of me.
Like, every time I don't wantto Like, sometimes I just want
to go off and do my own thing,but I got my son next to me.
It's what's required of meevery time.
Like me and my wife get into it, I sometimes in my mind I won't
escape, but it's like, no, butwhat's what's required of me?
Every time I talk to somebodyand they deny and saying there's
(17:34):
no such thing as god or this, Igotta like learn how to stick
it.
Stick in that and say let metalk through this, let me figure
this out, this what's requiredof me, and so, um, it's just.
It's just what I understand,like, as that's what's required
of us is to step up and be therefor the people around us.
And so the leadership, thesocial, emotional, the community
(17:58):
engagement, like I said, we'recalled to serve, right.
And then the last part isfinancial literacy.
I tell my guys this, tim, it'slike, do these three things and
you'll be a powerful brother.
Number two put an anchor inyour spirituality.
And number three, financialliteracy Understand how money
(18:18):
works.
If you do those three things,you're going to listen, you're
going to control your narrativein this world.
You know what I'm saying and so, in short, because I could be
long with it, you know what I'msaying, you know what I mean,
that's where it comes from,that's real.
Speaker 2 (18:35):
One of your favorite quotes is, and I love this
maturity does not begin with age, but with the acceptance of
responsibility.
How do you see this principleplaying out in your work with
young men growing and that?
Speaker 3 (18:50):
quote came to me, man , when I was at my lowest point.
Tim and I came across that andI'm like, I read that maturity
does not begin with age, and sowe see a lot of brothers older,
they look older than 40, 50s andthey still have like the 20s
man.
I mean, you know, you playsports, you know how it is.
(19:11):
I go to the gym now do 45, 50.
I'm still trying to make it tothe league.
I'm still trying to make it tothe league.
I'm still trying to do this.
You know what I mean.
Or, dude, you got six babymamas and you still talking
about you can't find the rightone.
And like you know what I'msaying, Like you know what I
mean, it's just so many immaturethings, decisions that we're
making.
And so for me, when I see thatI'm trying to get our young men
(19:32):
to understand like, yeah, thesituation at home may not be the
best.
Yeah, life ain't working out howit's supposed to work out for
you.
But understand, maturity comeswith you accepting what's ever
in front of you.
Accept it right.
If you accept that, right there, you are maturing and you're
going in the route you're goingto, basically supposed to go to.
(19:55):
So it's about themunderstanding, like we talk
about understanding, like I lookat maturity like a mirror right
, and I feel like when brothersdon't accept maturity, they're
standing on sand sinking.
It's not a solid ground, butthat moment in my life where I
said, man, you know what, I'mnot perfect, I haven't done
(20:16):
everything right, but I'm goingto start today of trying to
change my life, that's when thatfirst step on the solid ground
began and you can start buildingwhat it is you're trying to
build.
But if you keep denying theresponsibility that's called to
you, you're not really standingon solid ground.
So it begins with maturity.
That's what it begins with.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
It's good you know as a, as a mentor, what advice
would you give to our audienceabout building meaningful
relationships with young peopleand empowering them to take
ownership of their lives?
Speaker 3 (20:46):
First thing, you got to remember that you was their
age at one point in time.
You got to remember that.
You got to accept that.
You know what I'm saying andyou have to understand that you
can't live vicariously throughthem.
Right, you had your turn, sonow it's their turn.
So you have to create, you haveto have, you have to be patient
Right, you have to.
(21:07):
Let's go back.
You have to be well yourself,so let's deal with that.
First, you know what I'm saying.
You got to be well.
So, if we're talking about, youwant to, you want to pour into
young man and you want to bethere for him, make sure that
you're right, make sure thatyour, your, your social,
emotional is balanced so thatwhen it's your time, you'll be
patient, you'll listen to himand I and I say this all the
(21:30):
time you will give them thegrace that they deserve Um and
that and and so then, when yougive them that grace they
deserve, then you're going tolet them know that you hear them
and that you see them, and sothen, when they do make mistakes
, you're going to remind them,like I'm not perfect, they're
not perfect, so let's walk thisthing out together.
And then I tell people, man,like I tell people about
(21:53):
marriage.
Like you know, you got to getthe manual.
There's some books out here.
You got to.
You got to educate yourself onthe things that are impacting
our young people so that you canuse the language that're using,
(22:16):
words that demonstrate to themthat you hear them and you care
about them.
Then they're going to open uptheir heart and they're going to
give you time and they're goingto give you respect to say,
okay, I'm going to listen towhat you're saying, you know
what I'm saying, so that's whatI would say to the audiences
those things right there.
Speaker 2 (22:34):
That's a good word, great word for mentors.
You know you've been working inthis space for decades.
You've seen hundreds of youngmen that you work with.
What are some?
You know times of change,actually, you know we've got the
cell phone and all the socialmedia.
What are some for thisgeneration?
What are some common themes orareas where they struggle the
(22:54):
most, and how would you help usin addressing those challenges?
Speaker 3 (23:00):
You said it right the cell phone technology.
You know just.
You know we tell young men allthe time, people all the time
like you got this device, youcan make money on it.
You know what I'm saying.
You could do so many things.
You can just go to it and getall the information.
Before we had to go to thelibrary, we had to come across
somebody.
But you know, the key thing tothis is Tim.
You got to be in the rightheadspace, you got to be
(23:20):
mentally mature to deal with it,right.
So you got to get them tounderstand and the parents to
understand, just because theyhad a cell phone.
And if they're not mentallymature, it's going to kick their
butt.
And so the one thing we try todo is try to get them to buy
into the fact that you got toseparate yourself and create
friction between you and thecell phone, right?
(23:41):
Um, that's one of the things.
The other thing is we, we tryto get them to understand.
Like you know, reading is keyman.
Like we try to get these guyslike you gotta, you gotta
discipline yourself to read abook.
You know I'm saying you know thesame.
You know, if you want to keepsomething from a black young man
.
Put it in a book.
You know what I'm saying.
Put it in a book, and so thoseare the things that you know,
(24:04):
that I've learned, and you knowthe same things you deal with.
It's nothing different thanwhat you're dealing with, it's
just.
I think it's just understandingthe language and trying to
understand them.
I think the, I think thecontent and the wisdom is still
going to be passed down fromgeneration, but it's just the
packaging of how you deliver itto them.
You know what I'm saying.
(24:25):
The same things I'm saying now.
You've probably said umpteentimes right, you know what I'm
saying, but it's just how wedeliver it to the young people.
Them cell phones is a monster,and so that's one of the biggest
things and also the one thingI've learned also, tim, is that
they don't like the citizens,they don't like quiet.
(24:45):
They don't like.
They don't like that stillnessand quietness because the cell
phone technology is alwaysreadily available.
So we really try to work withour young men in that social,
emotional space is to sit downand be still and listen to their
bodies.
One of the things about mentalhealth is like you got to learn
how to sit down and hearyourself, and hear what your
(25:05):
body and mind is saying, andthat's a very important space,
and so that's the one thing thatwe really try to harbor with
our young men is, like you gotto learn how to sit.
Speaker 2 (25:14):
Still, what our young men is like you gotta learn how
to sit.
Still, it's good.
One thing that I've realized inthis, that I heard said this
way real change happens when thepeople who need it lead it.
Real change happens when thepeople who need it lead it.
You think about the change inthis country has got to be led
by young people.
You know they have to lead it.
You know you and I trying tofigure out the phones and what
(25:36):
all that, I don't know, I'm notreally that interested, but but,
but.
But you have some, some youngpeople who are sharing their
experience right now.
Right now, think about you, anathlete.
You know we're looking up tothat guy who's about two years
older than us.
You know we can't wait to belike him.
You know right right, watchingeverything he does.
And that's what these youngpeople, and that's what you're
(25:56):
building a generation of youngpeople that are those positive
peers, so to speak, those nearpeers, who are leading them in
that direction.
You know, as we come around thecorner, this is a legacy
podcast.
As you look back over your lifeand the things you've
accomplished thus far, whatlegacy is Gary Hicks?
A senior building.
What is your legacy?
What are you building?
Speaker 3 (26:18):
See, it's simple man, God, with all my heart, mind,
body and soul, and that I'mcalled to love my son, wife and
my daughter, and that's mylegacy.
It's nothing else.
No more, none less.
To leave a picture of, not aperfect man, but a man who will
(26:45):
cry when you ask him the rightquestion, a man who will get on
his knees and ask God, I don'tknow what to do.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know, I don't know.
But I know I love you and I lovemy family, and my legacy is
that I care for people.
I care, I simply care.
I care to see a young man smileand I care to see a woman who,
(27:08):
when they have a good man, theysmile, they carry themselves
different.
I care when I see my sonwalking in peace and grace and
walking with confidence in theroom because he sees dad do it.
I care about my daughter, youknow, sacrificing certain things
so that she can find a manwho's going to resemble her dad
(27:35):
and one of the proudest momentsfor me is that I never have
brought too much disappointmentto my mother's footstep.
She will never say that when shetalks about her son, her baby
she lights up.
That's my legacy and my fatherknows that.
I tell him I love you, pops.
I wouldn't be the man I amwithout you.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
That's it.
Wow, that's powerful.
That's a drop the mic momentthere.
That's good stuff.
That's great stuff.
One more time, can you telly'all how they can get involved
in Young Men Growing and howthey can contact you?
Would you mind sharing that forthe audience?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Absolutely so.
You can just simply go toyoungmangrownorg.
There you click on a link andyou can see our story.
We try really hard to make sureour website tells a story.
Also, when you click on it, youwill see the summit pop up.
The summit is Saturday, aprilthe 19th.
Doors open up at 9.30.
Registration Free continentalbreakfast.
We will provide lunch, we havedynamic speakers, giveaways and
we will have breakout sessionstalking about everything that
(28:47):
we're talking about here, and itwill be at Cuyahoga Community
College, at the Eastern Campusand Harvard area, harvard Park
area.
Yeah, and if you want to reachout to us, you can reach out to
us at youngmangrown, at Gmail.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
You know, one thing that I saw in there that was
really intriguing to me is theparent sessions.
How long do you have a parentsession?
As we wrap this up, what's thegoal of those parent sessions?
A lot of times we point at ayoung man and we have a lot of
mothers.
Just being honest, what's thegoal of those parent sessions?
Speaker 3 (29:26):
Yeah, man, me being in education man like you can
have the perfect classroom, youcan have really good, solid
classroom management, you canhave your young people engaged
and they're learning and growing.
But the buck stop when they gohome and if they don't have that
same type of atmosphere at home, if they're not seeing a mom or
dad or grandmama reading, theydon't see that they're having
(29:47):
quiet time.
They don't see, you know,spiritual growth being modeled.
They don't see, they don't hearconversation of real world
issues going on and talking itout.
They don't see.
They don't hear a conversationof real world issues going on
and talking it out.
They don't see the patience andgrace that they need to carry
themselves with, even the waythey dress, the way they walk
and how they introducethemselves.
They don't see those things.
It's like they're only gettinghalf the picture and typically
(30:10):
they're going to it's going tobe hard for them to make that
decision.
And so, going back to ourparents, we really try to buy
into our parents and get themlike if I get my parents to buy
in, the young man ain't got nochoice.
Speaker 2 (30:21):
But, dr Hicks, I want to thank you for being on the
show and appreciate your passion, your true passion for a young
man.
I can feel it through thescreen.
I'm sure everybody's listeningand feel and understand your
passion and now they know yourwhy All of us have to have a why
.
Listening and feel andunderstand your passion and now
they know your why All of ushave to have a why.
Now they know why you do whatyou do.
(30:42):
So I want to thank you forstanding the gap for so many
young men and just empoweringthose young men and families and
being that model for them.
This is Coach Tim Brown.
I want to thank our audiencefor listening to Be A Baller
podcast.
Be sure to subscribe and sharethis episode with others and, as
always, continue to build alifelong legacy.
Be a baller.
Thanks, gary, for joining us.
Appreciate you.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
Thanks as well.
If you've enjoyed this episode,please share it with family and
friends.
The Be a Baller podcast isavailable on all major podcast
platforms.
This podcast was created byCoach Tim Brown and recorded and
edited by the video productionclass of Worthington Christian
high school.
Be sure to come back next weekas we continue to discuss on how
(31:26):
to build a lifelong legacy.
Until then, don't forget to bea baller.
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