March 3, 2025 • 44 mins
Florian Horning takes us on an exhilarating journey exploring what it means to live an extraordinary life. He shares how reading about inspiring figures propelled him toward adventure and discovery, illustrating the importance of individuality and authenticity in our choices.
Flohjoe is a "Happy Life" coach, founder of "Simplicity of Happiness," and an adventurous, human-centric nomad.
- Discovering the extraordinary in routine life
- Embracing unique experiences
- The transition from recruitment to coaching
- Importance of asking the right questions
- Lessons learned from life in Africa
- Reflections on personal growth and self-acceptance
Flohjoe's episode is a heartfelt invitation to examine your desires and inspirations, empowering you to create a life that reflects your dreams.
Let's enjoy his story!
Florian | Inspire & Empower: simplicity of happiness
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Thank you for listening - Hasta Pronto!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Daniela SM (00:01):
Hi, I'm Daniela.
Welcome to my podcast.
Because Everyone has a Story,the place to give ordinary
people's stories the chance tobe shared and preserved.
Our stories become the languageof connections.
Let's enjoy it, connect andrelate, because everyone has a
story.
Welcome.
My guest is Florian Horning, orFlo.
(00:25):
What a treat it was to have himon the show.
He's a nomad coach and thefounder of Simplicity of
Happiness.
Most of us don't think we'reliving an extraordinary life.
Flo was no exception, but whenyou hear his story, from a small
town in Germany to the vastexpanse of the Sahara Desert and
(00:46):
all the adventures after that,you will see the trials and
triumphs that make his liferemarkable.
He dives into authenticity andencourages us to break free from
societal expectations andinstead compare our life to our
own journey.
Where was I two, five or even10 years ago?
(01:08):
Are we living the extraordinarylife we want?
And extraordinary means a lotof things for everyone.
As I was preparing for thisepisode, I received an
unexpected news.
A dear classmate from our timein Switzerland, mo Mani, passed
away suddenly at just around 55.
(01:30):
Mo was one of those people whofilled the room with humor and
kindness, leaving everyone withgreat memories.
An extraordinary life isn'tabout length.
It's about the impact we haveon others and the joy we create
along the way.
And I am certain that, thoughMo's life was short, it was
(01:50):
extraordinary.
So, as we listen to Flo's story, let's take a moment to reflect
on our own journey.
What does your extraordinarylife look like?
Let's enjoy Flo's story.
So welcome Flo, to the show.
Thank you for being here.
Florian Horning (02:06):
Thank you for inviting me.
Daniela SM (02:07):
Yes, I'm super excited that you're here and
that you have a story, so why doyou want to share your story?
Florian Horning (02:13):
Basically because you asked me to yes when
I was younger.
I loved to read and hear storiesof people who did something
extraordinary.
And what does it meanextraordinary?
For me, it meant not doing thesame as I used to do and
everybody else that I know.
(02:35):
So I grew up in a small placein Germany, went to school there
, graduated there, and I justwanted to see the world, and I
did not get inspired by thepeople around me.
I got inspired by people that Iread about or heard of.
Then I accidentally went on anextraordinary path myself, and I
(02:58):
think it's worth sharing,because some might relate and
some might get inspired.
Sharing because some mightrelate and some might get
inspired.
And it's not to be inspired todo as I did, but to be inspired
to follow their own calling ortheir own path.
Daniela SM (03:13):
Beautiful, wonderful .
So thank you so much.
When is that your story starts?
Obviously, when you wereyounger you were reading stories
, but then, when this, yourextraordinary life started.
Florian Horning (03:24):
Yeah, that's a good question, because I don't
know, it still does not feelextraordinary, it's still just
me.
I didn't change that much.
On the inside it feels the sameand there was one day that I
decided to go on a multi-weeksolo hike in Sahara and it was
(03:48):
super boring and super hot andthe backpack was super heavy and
I just felt like a cool kidwalking home with a way too
heavy backpack and I did notfeel extraordinary at all.
I had no internet, no cellphone connection.
I had a satellite telephoneback then and I could give my
(04:09):
mom a call to tell her that I'mstill alive and I felt like
calling home.
Like mom, I'm coming home alittle bit later.
So most of the time I stillfeel the same.
It's still me.
Daniela SM (04:20):
But you change something, you change the
routine or what everybody wasdoing in your area to make it
less ordinary if you don't wantto use extra.
Florian Horning (04:30):
Yeah, well, I just wanted to play a bit with
that ordinary thing because Iwas always looking for the
extraordinary and I thought thatthere might be a time or a day
when I personally feelextraordinary, and as long as I
kept comparing myself to others,and.
I was never looking down whencomparing myself.
(04:51):
I was always looking up.
So I always felt like theunderachiever, the not so
extraordinary, the boring guy.
What is much more importantthan feeling extraordinary is
feeling me, feeling myself,being happy and proud of what
I'm doing.
(05:11):
And I struggled.
I struggled very, very oftenwith that.
So when I was still going toschool so in germany, you had to
go to school for 13 grades, 13years, and in the 11th grade you
could take a gap year and spendit abroad and out of my entire
school I think three or fourpeople did that and I went to
(05:34):
the United States and I livedthere, next to the Rocky
Mountains in Utah, and it was awonderful time.
And well, then I came back andI felt a bit out of place
because everybody else was thesame and I felt the same, but it
did not really match.
(05:55):
And from that day on I knewthat I just wanted to move on.
I wanted to see the world, Iwanted to speak other languages.
I always underperformed inlanguages.
My German grades were bad, myEnglish grades were worse, my
French we don't want to talkabout this and I had Latin in
school and I completely failedthere and I thought I'm just not
(06:17):
the language guy.
But I found out that I'm notthis learning guy as soon as I
had to talk, I'm fine.
So now I'm not this learningguy.
As soon as I had to talk, I'mfine.
So now I'm speaking Englishquite well, I survive in French,
I understand some Italian andI'm getting along, because I
found out that it's not abouttechnically learning the grammar
(06:40):
, it's about the wonders ofcommunication and talking to
people.
And now I'm all aboutcommunication.
I work as a coach and I focuson communication, because
leadership is the way that wetalk to ourselves and then it's
the way that we talk to others,whether we motivate them or we
put pressure on them.
(07:00):
So that was, I think, like aninitial spark, when I knew that
I wanted to break out of thisrural surrounding that I had
over here.
And after my graduation Iworked in a national park for a
year.
Then I went to the next city tostudy there, and then I moved
(07:27):
on to Berlin and I stayed inBerlin for quite a while and at
some point in Berlin I thoughtthat I achieved everything that
I thought I should have.
Being a German, you know thisyou have to go to university,
you have to study, you have tofind a job, you have to find a
nice and decent house, you haveto, you have to be married, like
all these things aroundbuilding a house or building a
(07:50):
home and building a family.
And the more I had of this, themore I get frustrated, because
I just read these adventurestories of people traveling
around the world in in a van orbackpacking or sailing around
the world.
That was a time where I feltthat I am not me, but that I'm
(08:11):
trying to impress others and I'mliving somebody else's life my
wife back then.
We didn't get along.
My job situation was reallydifficult.
There was a time of LehmanBrothers.
I worked as a headhunter in theinternational finance industry.
Lehman Brothers obviouslydisappeared from one day to
(08:32):
another.
Lots of people lost their job.
They had plenty of money beforeand all of a sudden I saw they
are still having the sameproblems.
They are just adding some zeros.
At the end I had my penthouse inBerlin.
I had the open chimney, the viewover Berlin, the sauna.
In the end I had my penthousein Berlin.
I had the open chimney, theview over Berlin, the sauna in
the bathroom and all I wasthinking of was that I was
(08:52):
worrying that I could stillfinance this.
If well, maybe I have anotherstruggle with the income or
another bank is going bankrupt.
And that's the point when, onthe one hand, I transferred to
coaching because these peoplethat lost their job that I
placed before, they came back tome and asked me for advice,
(09:14):
although I was mid-20.
And the reason why they askedme was that they said, flo, you
were the only person that Italked to over the last five
years in the recruiting industrythat did not tell me what to do
, but who asked me questions andwho helped me to move a step
(09:34):
further, and I really liked that.
And that's when I started thecoaching training.
And then I had to ask myselfthe coaching questions and I
found out I want to be somewherecompletely different.
Daniela SM (09:47):
Flo.
How were you different?
How do you become different?
Why were you different?
Why were you asking questionsinstead of telling people what
to do?
Florian Horning (09:54):
Because I did not go to school.
I had no idea where.
I was interested in everythingand nothing.
So we could talk aboutchemistry or we could talk about
physics and about biology andabout nature, and I love this
whole national park stuff.
Probably the thing that I wouldhave loved most is either
(10:15):
working in a zoo or becoming aranger somewhere in serengeti in
africa.
So I just wanted to be withwild animals.
I wanted to be be out there.
I wanted to be in the bush.
I wanted to sleep in the open.
I wanted to go on adventure.
I studied agriculture withnature protection.
I thought it was reallyinteresting, but I had no path
(10:36):
where I could go with that.
I always thought that I have tobecome rich and famous at some
point so that I can.
Once I achieved all of that,being someone in this world, I
could just tell everybody toscrew it and move on and live my
life, and people will allow meto do that because I deserved it
(10:58):
.
I didn't overperform when Iwent to university.
I needed some money, so Iworked as a researcher.
Obviously, I already lovedcommunication and I had no idea
what I was doing, and my bossback then took me on some client
conversations.
I think it was even a clientpitch.
(11:19):
That person talked to me all thetime and I had no idea what I
was doing there so I couldn'tpitch.
I couldn't tell what we weredoing.
All I could do is ask themquestions how they want us to
perform, and that's what madethe sell.
So they offered me a consultantcontract and all of a sudden I
was a headhunter, got paid verywell, basically lived in a suit,
(11:41):
was flying to Frankfurt twice aweek from Berlin.
Basically lived in a suit, wasflying to Frankfurt twice a week
from Berlin, making a lot ofmoney, meeting all these people,
and I had no idea what I wasdoing.
So all I could do is talk tothem about their wife, their
house, their dreams, what theywant to achieve with the job,
why they think they could fitthere, and so they made the cell
(12:02):
themselves and this worked outquite well wow and so it was
completely, completely byaccident, and that is what makes
a good coach, in my opinion.
It's not somebody who's tellingyou what you have to do, but
who's asking questions that youhave never answered before, and
somebody who's sticking with thequestions.
Daniela SM (12:23):
As a friend were you always.
A person who asked questionsFeels very emotional
intelligence.
Florian Horning (12:29):
No, I think I was being a child.
I was a pain in the buttbecause I never shut up and I
kept asking why, why, why, but,why is this, but, why is this,
but why is this?
So I never let people off thehook and if somebody told me,
yeah, because that's the way wedo it, yeah, but why are we
(12:49):
doing it like this?
So I was very pushy.
Pushy on that, wanted to findanswers.
So I always wanted to find itout, I wanted to figure it out
and I thought one.
I thought one day I'll be grownup and smart and wise, and
that's the time when I canexplain the world to other
people and I can tell you how itis done.
I thought that in order to bewell educated or intelligent, I
(13:16):
need to be the one with theanswers.
And so I used to cover up myown insecurities with telling
you a lot and giving you a lotof answers and being a bit of a,
or maybe a lot of a, smartassAt the same time.
Every time I met somebody thatI admired, I was asking a lot of
(13:37):
questions because I knew tothat person.
I don't have to prove anything,I just wanted to know and find
out how they are doing that,don't have to prove anything.
I just wanted to know and findout how they are doing that, and
I think that is something thatI was able to transform when I,
when I went into thatheadhunting business that I I
knew that I can't tell them howtheir job is done, so I
(13:58):
transferred to that yeah,curious child asking the
questions.
When I I transformed to coaching, though, I thought I have to do
all the coaching training sothat, because people now are
paying me money to achievesomething in their life, so I
thought that I have to tell themhow they get there.
(14:20):
I have to tell them thestrategy, I have to tell them
what's the next step, and youcan only coach people who are
way behind on the experiencelevel, because you can tell them
oh, I have been in thatsituation before and this worked
out and this did not, so it'svery limited.
(14:41):
So you always have to look downfor the, for the coaching, and
I think coaching is not aboutthis.
This is advisory, and I thoughtthat good coaching is advisory
telling people what, what to doand so I did that out of
curiosity when I was a child.
I did that out of curiositywhen I was a child.
I did that out of lack ofknowledge when I was a
headhunter and then I had torelearn that, being a coach,
(15:07):
that it is much more helpful ifI ask intelligent questions,
because the more complicated amatter is, the more difficult it
is to ask a really challengingquestion, and what I had to
learn most is shut up After youask the question.
(15:29):
Shut up, and exactly theopposite than today.
You are doing that.
You just ask a question, youlet me talk, question, you let
me talk, and in a coachingsituation, very often that is
the most like healing and whereyou can achieve the biggest step
forward.
So let somebody talk untilthere's nothing more to say and
(15:49):
then you ask them okay, how dowe move on now?
Daniela SM (15:53):
but it's hard to find the good questions.
Florian Horning (15:56):
What is hard about finding the good questions
?
If you're uninterested and ifyou don't understand the matter.
It's really difficult to stickwith the person, on the one hand
, understand what you're talkingabout and then being able to
step back to not get confusedwith the content, but to see the
(16:16):
greater context.
Confused with the content, butto see the greater context, you
have to stay in the moment,understand what they're talking
about and, at the same time,being able to push that away so
that you can have this metaposition and ask a question that
they don't expect.
So it's not the logical nextstep, but sometimes to move left
or right or ask a completelydifferent question, and there I.
(16:39):
It's a combination of, on theone hand, curiosity in my case
training and then a gut feeling.
So the moment that I stoptelling my own story, I can
completely immerse in yours andI get a feeling how you feel and
very often I feel that there'ssomething missing that I don't
(17:02):
understand.
And if I go for that, veryoften that's the point where you
don't have an answer and that'sthe moment where you pause and
it's drawing you out of your ownstory and then rethinking what
you really want to do it seemsall like magic.
Yes, that is when the magichappens.
(17:22):
One thing is life and the otherthing is this or the one story
is life happening and the otherstory is the one that we tell
ourselves about our life.
So one is living in the moment.
The other one is looking backand telling us a story about our
own life.
That story can change becausewe see everything out of our own
(17:48):
point of view and if we areable to shift the perspective.
I mean, a house can be verybeautiful from the front and
very crappy from the back.
Another house looks crappy fromthe front and has the most
beautiful backyard.
The way that you see thatproperty only depends on your
perspective, and what I do as agood coach is I help you to
(18:12):
change that perspective.
It's still the same house.
That feels like magic becauseit's a tiny moment and within
one moment you change theperspective and the whole world
looks different.
Daniela SM (18:27):
But also you are a very human-centric person, right
?
I would say that that's why youenjoy being coach and helping
and asking questions and helpingand asking questions.
Florian Horning (18:37):
Yeah, I viewed myself as a very analytic person
, a very logical person,somebody looking for and
searching for answers, somebodydividing the world in right and
wrong and good and bad.
I had to come to situationswhere I thought that I did
everything right and I failedwith that and all of a sudden, I
(18:58):
had to rethink what I did aftertraveling to the Sahara.
That was 2013 that I went on afour-week solo Sahara trip that
I just mentioned, with thesatellite telephone.
Before that, I was afraid on myown and I was afraid in the
dark and I had to sleep on myown, completely alone, under the
open sky in the desert.
(19:19):
And after that, a lot of otherthings completely changed and I
was much more easy with it.
I went more with the flow and Ilost the fear of a lot of
unknown because I thought, okay,I will figure it out one way or
another.
(19:39):
And that's the time that Istarted traveling.
I lived on the road with mygirlfriend back then.
We traveled all the way throughEurope again to the Sahara
Desert and back after what'smoved, to the mountains in
Switzerland.
Then she showed me her secondhome because she was very
(20:01):
attached to Tanzania.
Then I started to build a lodgeat the beach in Zanzibar.
So I had this tropical beachand the dolphins every day and
doing these tours on the waterand living this tropical African
life.
I had the lodge for almost fouryears.
I full-time lived in Zanzibarfor one year.
(20:23):
Then I met this world ofbetrayal and corruption and I
lost my lodge through.
We could make two podcasts justabout losing that lodge.
A lot of corruption, peoplejust coming up with a random
story, reporting you to thepolice, the police arresting you
for whatever reason, and thenyou can prove everything and
(20:45):
they say, yeah, that's true, youcan prove everything, but maybe
all of your proof is fake.
And then they say but it's anofficial government stamp.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you knowour government.
You can get every stamp youwant if you pay them the right
money.
And that's how I lost the Lodge.
Then I went back to Switzerland, then bought a boat.
(21:05):
I traveled for a year in a tinywooden boat on the
Mediterranean.
Then I opened a safari companyat Kilimanjaro and had a house
at Kilimanjaro and I did mySerengeti tours that I dreamed
of when I was younger, bought apiece of the national park in
southern Tanzania, and then Imet corruption and betrayal
again and I lost againeverything.
(21:27):
And then I moved full-time on aboat and now I'm living on a
sailing yard on theMediterranean.
Daniela SM (21:31):
Yeah, I can imagine that these things can happen.
Only because I grew up inVenezuela, so I know how
corruption it doesn't surpriseme.
Actually.
It's terrible that happened toyou.
Florian Horning (21:41):
Yes.
Daniela SM (21:42):
What I'm missing here is that so you were helping
people because you lost yourjob as a recruiter and people
were coming to you and then youbecame a coach.
And then from becoming a coachis then, when you started to
travel to the Sahara.
Florian Horning (21:56):
Every day I'm aiming to become a better coach
than yesterday.
However you call it, coaching,mentorship, leadership can
spiral you up and it is verydifficult if you have to grow on
your own.
And it's super helpful if youhave somebody lending you a hand
, inspiring you, asking you thetough questions, questions being
(22:19):
with you when it is difficult.
That is like spark in my in myeyes when I think about that.
I have the chance to motivatesomebody to follow their, their
own dreams.
So I am personally trying to beevery day to become a better
coach than I was yesterday.
So whenever I have the chanceto learn anything about coaching
, I go for that.
(22:40):
So I'm doing my own coachingsand my own coaching trainings
every now and then.
Sometimes I'm learning newtechniques and when you learn
them, you have to practice themon yourself.
So becoming a better coachforced me to ask the tough
questions myself.
And that's when I realized Idon't want to do that.
(23:03):
I don't want to be a coach withan own office in the same city,
waking up in the morning,making my coffee, driving an
hour to my coaching office,spending the day in the computer
, in front of the computer tofill my calendar, and then
having back-to-back coachings.
I wanted to live a life that Idream of In my life.
(23:26):
I love it when I'm outside,when I'm climbing mountains,
when I'm crossing deserts, whenI'm living on my boat.
Normally, I do my coachingsessions on my boat, even my
mastermind sessions.
I have 10 people in the calland I'm sitting somewhere on the
boat.
Normally, I do my coachingsessions on my boat, even my
mastermind sessions.
I have 10 people in the calland I'm sitting somewhere on the
boat.
It's, it's, it's.
It's not a fake background.
That's my life, because Iwanted to create this and this
(23:50):
is coming with a lot ofdownsides.
It's very difficult at timesbecause you're super dependent
on the weather, and still,that's the choice that I made.
This is, this is the life thatI that I love when, in my 20s
and in my early 30s, I was notbrave enough to go for that
choice, because I thought youhave to have a real job, you
(24:13):
need to have a house, you needto have a family, you need to
have a proper income, you needto have a house, you need to
have a family, you need to havea proper income.
You need to have these savingsBecause when you're traveling so
much you can't work or I can'twork 60 hours a week.
That I used to, because allthat travel has to come from
somewhere and they're driving aboat and repairing the boat and
(24:37):
maintaining everything.
It's time consuming as well.
Daniela SM (24:41):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, wonderful.
Now I'm curious and I don'twant to ask about money but how
do you manage to buy thisbungalow in Africa and the other
one?
You've saved a lot when youwere working as a recruiter as
much as I earn.
Florian Horning (24:58):
I started very slow.
I just invested $1,000 here,$1,000 there.
That wasn't a big deal, and Itook it out of my coaching money
and I thought it's a funproject.
And then I realized, oh, thisis something that I really
(25:19):
really really dreamed of.
And then I moved there All of asudden.
I had almost no fixed costbecause living there is super
cheap.
I kept working as a coach.
I had a big client at that time.
That was the oldest businessschool in the world.
It's called ESCP Europe.
I was in charge of theirinternational alumni career
(25:42):
coaching-wise.
I had to do that on the phoneanyway.
I could do that from Zanzibar,same time zone, super easy.
So I did, like this, spent alot, do that on the phone anyway
.
I could do that from Zanzibar,same time zone, super easy.
So I did, like this, spend alot of time on the phone and in
between I managed everythingthere, kept an eye on where they
spent the money, if they'rereally building this, if they're
really showing up.
I did the whole management ofthe of the lodge at some point.
(26:03):
It's tricky at times, and so atone time the cook left, and so
what did I do?
We had clients there, we hadpeople who wanted to have dinner
, so I did my coaching duringthe day and then I hung up the
phone and I went to the kitchenand I cooked for everybody.
So that's what you have to dowhen you're an entrepreneur, and
(26:24):
if you want something to besuccessful, you have to put your
own heart and your own uh, like, uh, sweat and tears into that.
So that's how I built it up.
It's just bit by bit, by bit bybit, and when it was up and
running, when I lost it and uh,so now it's uh, probably, uh,
it's still it's a tiny project.
So right now it's probablyworth like a quarter of a
(26:46):
million, half a million,something half a million,
something like that, not fromthe money that we put in there,
but from the reputation that itreceived.
Daniela SM (26:54):
And so now it's owned by the government, or who
took it.
Florian Horning (26:56):
No, no, no.
I had a partner, I had abusiness partner there and the
business partner wanted to haveit for himself.
Daniela SM (27:02):
Oh, okay.
Florian Horning (27:16):
And so these ups and downs because of major
things that happen.
Well, you lost several timesyour positions.
Have you decision whether youwill let that determine the rest
of your life or make the choiceto learn something out of that?
The money that I that Ipersonally put in there probably
probably 20 to 30 000 dollarsmoney wise, had I visited a
(27:40):
hotel, school or university andpaid for tuition and everything,
it's probably had spent moreand had less knowledge.
So I try to put it like thisand say, okay, everything that
cost me money is basically alesson that I bought and that I
(28:01):
received.
And now it's up on me whether Ilet that determine the rest of
my life in a good or in a badway.
Daniela SM (28:11):
I like that, that if you have gone to hotel school,
you have spent the same for sure.
Or more my husband and I, wewent to Switzerland for hotel
school.
It would have been more thanthat, yes.
Florian Horning (28:23):
And maybe you know some things better than me,
but I had to figure everythingout while doing it because I
wasn't prepared for that.
And while managing it, Ilearned the construction because
I understood what they weredoing.
And then I started to questionthat.
And then at some point, okay,let me do that myself.
(28:43):
Point, okay, let me do thatmyself.
And when I came back toswitzerland, after we lost that
I, we had the chance to rent ahouse in a skiing resort very,
very cheap, but it was, it wasrun down, was very broken.
Because I had the experiencefrom zanzibar, I thought, okay,
let's meet, let me do it myself.
And I I was completely changingconstruction and everything
(29:04):
myself.
I just, african style, builtthe construction to hold up the
roof and then I changed the, thewalls and everything still
holding up, and it's lookingsuper nice.
After having done that, I hadthe chance to renovate an old
sailboat and everybody that Iknew told me I'm completely
crazy, that boat will never swimagain.
Just figured it out and then Isailed with it through the
(29:28):
Mediterranean for three years.
Had I not done Zanzibar and thehouse in the mountains, I would
have not dared to do that,probably had bought a much more
expensive boat, and by now Iknow if you buy a much more
expensive boat it might hold fora year or two, but when things
(29:50):
start to break and they willalways break on a boat it's much
more expensive.
And then you either have tohave somebody do the job for you
, which is even more expensive,or you learn it the hard way.
So I started with that, workedmyself up and by now I'm very
confident with most of therepairs on a wooden boat and on
(30:10):
an epoxy boat as well, so I'mnot so dependent.
I could give the job away tosomebody else and I would be
able to understand whetherthey're doing a good job or not,
which can save you a lot ofmoney.
Or I could even do that myself,and I love that.
To build something with your ownhands and I need that.
In contrary to my coaching, Ilove talking to people, but at
(30:31):
some point I need to buildsomething myself, because if we
have a good conversation, afteryou hang up you start changing
your job or your relationship oryour life, and things change
for you.
For me, everything is the sameAt some point.
That is exhausting for me.
If I'm dependent, for my ownwell-being on your success.
(30:53):
Then I'm very dependent againand by having my own projects
that are in my own hands andthat I can realize and that I
can build up, and that if I canlive in that project or sail
with that project, it's verysatisfying.
And then I'm getting verydetached from your success and
(31:13):
that is again making me a bettercoach.
If I'm not dependent on youbeing successful, I can go back
and I can stay critical and Ican be the even better coach for
you.
Daniela SM (31:24):
Wow, I love everything you say.
First of all, I want to go backto say that you found a cheap
house in Switzerland.
That's amazing.
I didn't think anything wascheap in Switzerland.
Florian Horning (31:34):
Yeah, yeah.
And we had an agreement withthe landlord.
We got rent free for a coupleof years for doing the
renovation and that wasprice-wise.
That was fine for us doing therenovation, and that was price
wise.
That was that was fine for us.
But then he offered it for saleto us and he went bananas
because, oh, everything'slooking fine.
(31:54):
I was like, yeah, well, it wasme who saved the house.
In the end we went separateways because he wanted to sell
it.
That is a house in germany inthat condition that I found that
was like 50,000, if at all, andhe wanted to have 350,000.
Daniela SM (32:10):
Talking of the Swiss , oh, wow, you know, I
understand you like talking topeople, though I'm introvert and
like I need to recharge on myown.
But I feel like I need to havelittle projects, little things
that you built, not just tickingboxes, because that's what I do
at work.
For example, when I created thepodcast, everything I did it
myself and I had no idea and Ifeel so proud, like I feel like
(32:32):
proudest thing.
Well, there's another one too.
When I was in Switzerland inthe school we had, the yearbooks
were black and white, becausethis is in the nineties.
I was like we are going to havecolor, we're going to put a lot
of pictures, and I had a vision, the whole vision, from the
first page to everything.
Some teachers were like oh no,you don't have any experience.
And some of them believe in meand you know, the owner of the
(32:55):
school was this is the best bookever and this is like, oh my
God.
I feel like I did such anamazing thing Because it was
using your hands, using yourbrain, getting ideas.
Florian Horning (33:12):
And your hands, using your brain, getting ideas
, and the same with the podcast.
I feel like sometimes thoseachievements, for me, are so
much more valuable.
Most of the times that I'mcoaching, I'm coaching around,
so the thing that I'm mostinterested in is if a person has
the feeling that they want tobe where they are not.
So if they have the feelingthat they are not where they
want to be, then somethingobviously is missing.
And to find out what is missingand how you get there Because
(33:36):
if you want to get somewhere,you have to know where you want
to go, and most people just knowwhat they don't want Because
there are so many choices and tofind something that you really
want to work towards, that, Ithink, is super.
That is super interesting.
It's the same inside thecompany.
If you give somebody a raise ora title, something that you
(33:58):
receive one time, and then youtake it for granted.
If you're unsatisfied, thiswill not satisfy.
If you're completely happy withyour job and I give this to you
as recognition it will land,and you will not satisfy.
If you're completely happy withyour job and I give this to you
as recognition it will land andyou will own it from the moment
that you receive the raise orthat you receive the title and
you think, yeah, I own this, Iworked for this in my past and
(34:19):
now I own this.
And if I do a super good job,now I want to have the next
raise or the next title.
Do a super good job, now I wantto have the next race or the
next title.
Most people don't work tomaintain their income or
maintain their title.
They think they deserve that.
If you want them to overachieve, that needs to be the next step
.
Daniela SM (34:39):
The other thing, too , is that people are usually not
paid enough in all levels, sothey do want to raise so that
they can pay bills.
Florian Horning (34:46):
Yeah, and we talked about the motivation.
If you think that you alreadydeserve more, then giving you
the raise is something whichwill not create a lasting new
motivation.
The best case would be thatpeople think that, okay, now I
receive what I deserve, but it'snot a problem of motivation.
So it's much more interestingto talk to people about where do
(35:11):
you want to go, how do you wantto achieve that, so that they
have the feeling that with eachday they come to work and they
achieve something, they aregetting one step closer to where
they want to be.
So that is the creating mysuccess in my job myself.
It's not the job offering me arace once or a new title and
then I have it and then I don'tknow how to go from there.
(35:32):
But if you work on a plan andpeople have the idea they can
create the title or the racethemselves, then they have a
motivation to work towards.
Daniela SM (35:41):
Okay, and so, floor, thinking about all these
stories that you have told me, Ifeel like you are living an
extraordinary, unconventionallife.
You seem to be happy and, ontop of that, you seem to be
giving a lot to the world withyour coaching style and your
building stuff and creating.
Do you agree?
Are you happy?
(36:02):
Do you think you do have theextraordinary life?
Florian Horning (36:05):
Being happy is the most simple and the most
complicated thing in life.
Happiness is not a place to goto.
It's a place to come from.
You won't reach anything in theexternal world and when you
reach that place that title,that reward, that income that
will make you happy Happiness issomething that comes from
(36:29):
within.
If you choose to be happy, thenyou can bring that happiness
into the world, and I have metpeople being super poor and
people super rich, and bothbeing super unhappy or being
super happy.
Happiness is a choice.
(36:49):
I know that.
Sometimes I feel that, but oftenI still slip into my old
patterns and I'm unsatisfied andI'm not happy with that.
I have to remind myself to begrateful and thankful for who I
(37:10):
am.
And as soon as I compare myselfand I think, oh, I should, I
ought to, you have to.
What do other people thinkabout this?
Did you really make the bestout of your life?
Then I'm getting nervous andfrustrated, and I'm not.
What helps is if I think backfive years or ten years.
Think about all the stories andall the experience that I have
(37:33):
accumulated in between.
If somebody had told me thatten years ago, I would not
believe that I'm able to do that, and now I just take it for
granted.
So I think it makes sense ifyou compare yourself every once
in a while with yourselfyesterday and yourself a year
ago and yourself 10 years ago,because right now I'm always
(37:55):
where I am right now and Ialways have the goals lying
ahead of me and they always seemlike a very steep learning
curve.
And when I look back from whereI am right now, I take that for
granted.
But taking yourself back intime and say, okay, imagine 10
years ago that you were the onedoing this and this and this and
(38:15):
achieving this and that, andthat's the moment where I think,
yeah, I like me, I like myself.
Daniela SM (38:22):
All right, keep comparing yourself with yourself
.
Florian Horning (38:25):
All right, keep comparing yourself with
yourself Only person who'sliving your life is you.
The only person having yourthoughts and your dreams and
your feelings and yourcapabilities and your obstacles
in life is you.
Everybody else and this issomething really interesting
Even if you talk to the richestpeople, they have their fears
(38:48):
and they have their struggles.
They are just adding zeros atthe end.
It's just a bit bigger, buteverybody is facing problems
that they think that they don'tknow how to handle, wherever
they are in life.
So if you are looking, ifyou're just comparing my wealth
to somebody else's wealth, or mycoaching reach to somebody
(39:09):
else's, or my coachingexperience to somebody else's, I
can always find somebody who,if it looks from my perspective,
looks like I'm a nobody.
They are not living my life andI'm not living their life
(39:30):
living their life, and they havethe same internal struggles
that I do, because they know allthe other stuff that is going
through their head and throughtheir life.
My life is about managing mylife, so compare yourself to
yourself, thank you.
Daniela SM (39:41):
And so what is up for you in the future?
Florian Horning (39:42):
Any plans, or you say you're always having
steep goals on the one hand, I'mjust adding a a new mastermind,
together with my, with mygirlfriend.
She's a quite a famous sailingvlogger.
Personally thinks she's one ofthe like top 10 solo sailing
women worldwide.
She's very well known for solosailing and now we're sailing
(40:07):
together, so let's see how thatis going to change.
And we have the idea that wewant to help other young,
especially women, who want toleave their nine to five job
behind.
They don't know how, so we arecreating a mastermind coaching
program for them.
I think that we can add so muchvalue because we like men, men
(40:30):
and women, different backgrounds, different income streams,
different set of experiences,different backgrounds, and I
have no idea how to fill that upand how to make that successful
.
So that is like like one biggoal ahead of mine.
Uh, business wise andpersonally, we wanted to sail to
(40:50):
west africa, which is veryuncommon to sail there, so from
europe to the canary islands, tocape verde and then to to
gambia.
Uh, some family issues, so myfather just died two weeks ago
and that, like I had to changeeverything around and focus on
people and not on goals, and nowit's getting a bit late in the
(41:13):
year and I don't know if we aremaking it this year or if we're
making it at all.
And I'm thinking about thisbecause we already promised to
film a whole season for herchannel in West Africa and now
we don't know if we go there.
So it's a difficult and verylong way to sail.
So these are two things thatare very currently on my plate.
(41:36):
No idea how to get there.
Daniela SM (41:39):
And what about pirates?
Are you not afraid of piratesaround that area?
Florian Horning (41:43):
I'm more afraid of the orcas in the Strait of
Gibraltar.
Around that area, I'm moreafraid of the orcas in the
Strait of Gibraltar If you gofurther down, to Liberia, ghana,
towards Nigeria, there are acouple of pirate attacks.
And then on the other side ofAfrica, on Somalia, there are
pirate attacks, but from Morocco, mauritania, senegal, all the
way to Guinea-Bissau there areno.
Daniela SM (42:06):
Okay, and why do you want to go there?
Why that goal?
Florian Horning (42:10):
I still love Africa.
It is very raw, very joyful,especially because it's so hot.
It's much closer to nature.
So in the north, you have totake care for the winter, you
have to have a house, you haveto have the warm clothes, you
have to take care for the winter, you have to have a house, you
have to have the warm clothes,you have to be inside, and in
Africa so much of the life isoutside and is on the streets.
(42:32):
I still love African culture,as long as I don't do business.
Spending the winter there whenit is cold in Europe is super
interesting.
This area is supposed to be oneof the most beautiful sailing
destinies in the world, but it'svery difficult to get back from
there and it has no sailinginfrastructure.
(42:52):
So all the people who want togo on vacation, they go to the
Met, because there you can gofrom one harbor to the other.
There you have to be.
You need to have an offshoreboat, you have to be able to
live on the boat, make your ownwater, have enough storage for
the food and to be able to live.
Quite simple, because you can'tgo to any supermarket.
You can't buy groceries likeyou do here.
(43:14):
You just buy the raw vegetablesand the raw fish if you want to
have some.
I like that because it'sremoving a lot of the artificial
nonsense in typical Europeanlife.
Daniela SM (43:27):
In general, even in North America.
Florian Horning (43:29):
Or in Northern yeah.
Daniela SM (43:30):
All right.
So, flo, thank you so much forsharing your story and thank you
so much for making this happen.
I know how busy you were.
You're such a charismatic guythat since I met you, you
treated me like a friend and socasual.
I love it.
So thank you very much.
I enjoyed the conversation.
Florian Horning (43:47):
Yeah, me too.
Thank you for having me.
Daniela SM (43:50):
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed today'sepisode.
I am Daniela and you arelistening to, because Everyone
has a Story.
Please take five seconds rightnow and think of somebody in
your life that may enjoy whatyou just heard, or someone that
has a story to be shared andpreserved.
When you think of that person,shoot them a text with the link
(44:11):
of this podcast.
This will allow the ordinarymagic to go further.
Join me next time for anotherstory conversation.
Thank you for listening.
Hasta pronto.
Hi, I'm Daniela.
Welcome to my podcast.
Because Everyone has a Story,the place to give ordinary
people's stories the chance tobe shared and preserved.
Our stories become the languageof connections.
Let's enjoy it, connect andrelate, because everyone has a
story.
Welcome.
My guest is Florian Horning, orFlo.
(00:25):
What a treat it was to have himon the show.
He's a nomad coach and thefounder of Simplicity of
Happiness.
Most of us don't think we'reliving an extraordinary life.
Flo was no exception, but whenyou hear his story, from a small
town in Germany to the vastexpanse of the Sahara Desert and
(00:46):
all the adventures after that,you will see the trials and
triumphs that make his liferemarkable.
He dives into authenticity andencourages us to break free from
societal expectations andinstead compare our life to our
own journey.
Where was I two, five or even10 years ago?
(01:08):
Are we living the extraordinarylife we want?
And extraordinary means a lotof things for everyone.
As I was preparing for thisepisode, I received an
unexpected news.
A dear classmate from our timein Switzerland, mo Mani, passed
away suddenly at just around 55.
(01:30):
Mo was one of those people whofilled the room with humor and
kindness, leaving everyone withgreat memories.
An extraordinary life isn'tabout length.
It's about the impact we haveon others and the joy we create
along the way.
And I am certain that, thoughMo's life was short, it was
(01:50):
extraordinary.
So, as we listen to Flo's story, let's take a moment to reflect
on our own journey.
What does your extraordinarylife look like?
Let's enjoy Flo's story.
So welcome Flo, to the show.
Thank you for being here.
Florian Horning (02:06):
Thank you for inviting me.
Daniela SM (02:07):
Yes, I'm super excited that you're here and
that you have a story, so why doyou want to share your story?
Florian Horning (02:13):
Basically because you asked me to yes when
I was younger.
I loved to read and hear storiesof people who did something
extraordinary.
And what does it meanextraordinary?
For me, it meant not doing thesame as I used to do and
everybody else that I know.
(02:35):
So I grew up in a small placein Germany, went to school there
, graduated there, and I justwanted to see the world, and I
did not get inspired by thepeople around me.
I got inspired by people that Iread about or heard of.
Then I accidentally went on anextraordinary path myself, and I
(02:58):
think it's worth sharing,because some might relate and
some might get inspired.
Sharing because some mightrelate and some might get
inspired.
And it's not to be inspired todo as I did, but to be inspired
to follow their own calling ortheir own path.
Daniela SM (03:13):
Beautiful, wonderful .
So thank you so much.
When is that your story starts?
Obviously, when you wereyounger you were reading stories
, but then, when this, yourextraordinary life started.
Florian Horning (03:24):
Yeah, that's a good question, because I don't
know, it still does not feelextraordinary, it's still just
me.
I didn't change that much.
On the inside it feels the sameand there was one day that I
decided to go on a multi-weeksolo hike in Sahara and it was
(03:48):
super boring and super hot andthe backpack was super heavy and
I just felt like a cool kidwalking home with a way too
heavy backpack and I did notfeel extraordinary at all.
I had no internet, no cellphone connection.
I had a satellite telephoneback then and I could give my
(04:09):
mom a call to tell her that I'mstill alive and I felt like
calling home.
Like mom, I'm coming home alittle bit later.
So most of the time I stillfeel the same.
It's still me.
Daniela SM (04:20):
But you change something, you change the
routine or what everybody wasdoing in your area to make it
less ordinary if you don't wantto use extra.
Florian Horning (04:30):
Yeah, well, I just wanted to play a bit with
that ordinary thing because Iwas always looking for the
extraordinary and I thought thatthere might be a time or a day
when I personally feelextraordinary, and as long as I
kept comparing myself to others,and.
I was never looking down whencomparing myself.
(04:51):
I was always looking up.
So I always felt like theunderachiever, the not so
extraordinary, the boring guy.
What is much more importantthan feeling extraordinary is
feeling me, feeling myself,being happy and proud of what
I'm doing.
(05:11):
And I struggled.
I struggled very, very oftenwith that.
So when I was still going toschool so in germany, you had to
go to school for 13 grades, 13years, and in the 11th grade you
could take a gap year and spendit abroad and out of my entire
school I think three or fourpeople did that and I went to
(05:34):
the United States and I livedthere, next to the Rocky
Mountains in Utah, and it was awonderful time.
And well, then I came back andI felt a bit out of place
because everybody else was thesame and I felt the same, but it
did not really match.
(05:55):
And from that day on I knewthat I just wanted to move on.
I wanted to see the world, Iwanted to speak other languages.
I always underperformed inlanguages.
My German grades were bad, myEnglish grades were worse, my
French we don't want to talkabout this and I had Latin in
school and I completely failedthere and I thought I'm just not
(06:17):
the language guy.
But I found out that I'm notthis learning guy as soon as I
had to talk, I'm fine.
So now I'm not this learningguy.
As soon as I had to talk, I'mfine.
So now I'm speaking Englishquite well, I survive in French,
I understand some Italian andI'm getting along, because I
found out that it's not abouttechnically learning the grammar
(06:40):
, it's about the wonders ofcommunication and talking to
people.
And now I'm all aboutcommunication.
I work as a coach and I focuson communication, because
leadership is the way that wetalk to ourselves and then it's
the way that we talk to others,whether we motivate them or we
put pressure on them.
(07:00):
So that was, I think, like aninitial spark, when I knew that
I wanted to break out of thisrural surrounding that I had
over here.
And after my graduation Iworked in a national park for a
year.
Then I went to the next city tostudy there, and then I moved
(07:27):
on to Berlin and I stayed inBerlin for quite a while and at
some point in Berlin I thoughtthat I achieved everything that
I thought I should have.
Being a German, you know thisyou have to go to university,
you have to study, you have tofind a job, you have to find a
nice and decent house, you haveto, you have to be married, like
all these things aroundbuilding a house or building a
(07:50):
home and building a family.
And the more I had of this, themore I get frustrated, because
I just read these adventurestories of people traveling
around the world in in a van orbackpacking or sailing around
the world.
That was a time where I feltthat I am not me, but that I'm
(08:11):
trying to impress others and I'mliving somebody else's life my
wife back then.
We didn't get along.
My job situation was reallydifficult.
There was a time of LehmanBrothers.
I worked as a headhunter in theinternational finance industry.
Lehman Brothers obviouslydisappeared from one day to
(08:32):
another.
Lots of people lost their job.
They had plenty of money beforeand all of a sudden I saw they
are still having the sameproblems.
They are just adding some zeros.
At the end I had my penthouse inBerlin.
I had the open chimney, the viewover Berlin, the sauna.
In the end I had my penthousein Berlin.
I had the open chimney, theview over Berlin, the sauna in
the bathroom and all I wasthinking of was that I was
(08:52):
worrying that I could stillfinance this.
If well, maybe I have anotherstruggle with the income or
another bank is going bankrupt.
And that's the point when, onthe one hand, I transferred to
coaching because these peoplethat lost their job that I
placed before, they came back tome and asked me for advice,
(09:14):
although I was mid-20.
And the reason why they askedme was that they said, flo, you
were the only person that Italked to over the last five
years in the recruiting industrythat did not tell me what to do
, but who asked me questions andwho helped me to move a step
(09:34):
further, and I really liked that.
And that's when I started thecoaching training.
And then I had to ask myselfthe coaching questions and I
found out I want to be somewherecompletely different.
Daniela SM (09:47):
Flo.
How were you different?
How do you become different?
Why were you different?
Why were you asking questionsinstead of telling people what
to do?
Florian Horning (09:54):
Because I did not go to school.
I had no idea where.
I was interested in everythingand nothing.
So we could talk aboutchemistry or we could talk about
physics and about biology andabout nature, and I love this
whole national park stuff.
Probably the thing that I wouldhave loved most is either
(10:15):
working in a zoo or becoming aranger somewhere in serengeti in
africa.
So I just wanted to be withwild animals.
I wanted to be be out there.
I wanted to be in the bush.
I wanted to sleep in the open.
I wanted to go on adventure.
I studied agriculture withnature protection.
I thought it was reallyinteresting, but I had no path
(10:36):
where I could go with that.
I always thought that I have tobecome rich and famous at some
point so that I can.
Once I achieved all of that,being someone in this world, I
could just tell everybody toscrew it and move on and live my
life, and people will allow meto do that because I deserved it
(10:58):
.
I didn't overperform when Iwent to university.
I needed some money, so Iworked as a researcher.
Obviously, I already lovedcommunication and I had no idea
what I was doing, and my bossback then took me on some client
conversations.
I think it was even a clientpitch.
(11:19):
That person talked to me all thetime and I had no idea what I
was doing there so I couldn'tpitch.
I couldn't tell what we weredoing.
All I could do is ask themquestions how they want us to
perform, and that's what madethe sell.
So they offered me a consultantcontract and all of a sudden I
was a headhunter, got paid verywell, basically lived in a suit,
(11:41):
was flying to Frankfurt twice aweek from Berlin.
Basically lived in a suit, wasflying to Frankfurt twice a week
from Berlin, making a lot ofmoney, meeting all these people,
and I had no idea what I wasdoing.
So all I could do is talk tothem about their wife, their
house, their dreams, what theywant to achieve with the job,
why they think they could fitthere, and so they made the cell
(12:02):
themselves and this worked outquite well wow and so it was
completely, completely byaccident, and that is what makes
a good coach, in my opinion.
It's not somebody who's tellingyou what you have to do, but
who's asking questions that youhave never answered before, and
somebody who's sticking with thequestions.
Daniela SM (12:23):
As a friend were you always.
A person who asked questionsFeels very emotional
intelligence.
Florian Horning (12:29):
No, I think I was being a child.
I was a pain in the buttbecause I never shut up and I
kept asking why, why, why, but,why is this, but, why is this,
but why is this?
So I never let people off thehook and if somebody told me,
yeah, because that's the way wedo it, yeah, but why are we
(12:49):
doing it like this?
So I was very pushy.
Pushy on that, wanted to findanswers.
So I always wanted to find itout, I wanted to figure it out
and I thought one.
I thought one day I'll be grownup and smart and wise, and
that's the time when I canexplain the world to other
people and I can tell you how itis done.
I thought that in order to bewell educated or intelligent, I
(13:16):
need to be the one with theanswers.
And so I used to cover up myown insecurities with telling
you a lot and giving you a lotof answers and being a bit of a,
or maybe a lot of a, smartassAt the same time.
Every time I met somebody thatI admired, I was asking a lot of
(13:37):
questions because I knew tothat person.
I don't have to prove anything,I just wanted to know and find
out how they are doing that,don't have to prove anything.
I just wanted to know and findout how they are doing that, and
I think that is something thatI was able to transform when I,
when I went into thatheadhunting business that I I
knew that I can't tell them howtheir job is done, so I
(13:58):
transferred to that yeah,curious child asking the
questions.
When I I transformed to coaching, though, I thought I have to do
all the coaching training sothat, because people now are
paying me money to achievesomething in their life, so I
thought that I have to tell themhow they get there.
(14:20):
I have to tell them thestrategy, I have to tell them
what's the next step, and youcan only coach people who are
way behind on the experiencelevel, because you can tell them
oh, I have been in thatsituation before and this worked
out and this did not, so it'svery limited.
(14:41):
So you always have to look downfor the, for the coaching, and
I think coaching is not aboutthis.
This is advisory, and I thoughtthat good coaching is advisory
telling people what, what to doand so I did that out of
curiosity when I was a child.
I did that out of curiositywhen I was a child.
I did that out of lack ofknowledge when I was a
headhunter and then I had torelearn that, being a coach,
(15:07):
that it is much more helpful ifI ask intelligent questions,
because the more complicated amatter is, the more difficult it
is to ask a really challengingquestion, and what I had to
learn most is shut up After youask the question.
(15:29):
Shut up, and exactly theopposite than today.
You are doing that.
You just ask a question, youlet me talk, question, you let
me talk, and in a coachingsituation, very often that is
the most like healing and whereyou can achieve the biggest step
forward.
So let somebody talk untilthere's nothing more to say and
(15:49):
then you ask them okay, how dowe move on now?
Daniela SM (15:53):
but it's hard to find the good questions.
Florian Horning (15:56):
What is hard about finding the good questions
?
If you're uninterested and ifyou don't understand the matter.
It's really difficult to stickwith the person, on the one hand
, understand what you're talkingabout and then being able to
step back to not get confusedwith the content, but to see the
(16:16):
greater context.
Confused with the content, butto see the greater context, you
have to stay in the moment,understand what they're talking
about and, at the same time,being able to push that away so
that you can have this metaposition and ask a question that
they don't expect.
So it's not the logical nextstep, but sometimes to move left
or right or ask a completelydifferent question, and there I.
(16:39):
It's a combination of, on theone hand, curiosity in my case
training and then a gut feeling.
So the moment that I stoptelling my own story, I can
completely immerse in yours andI get a feeling how you feel and
very often I feel that there'ssomething missing that I don't
(17:02):
understand.
And if I go for that, veryoften that's the point where you
don't have an answer and that'sthe moment where you pause and
it's drawing you out of your ownstory and then rethinking what
you really want to do it seemsall like magic.
Yes, that is when the magichappens.
(17:22):
One thing is life and the otherthing is this or the one story
is life happening and the otherstory is the one that we tell
ourselves about our life.
So one is living in the moment.
The other one is looking backand telling us a story about our
own life.
That story can change becausewe see everything out of our own
(17:48):
point of view and if we areable to shift the perspective.
I mean, a house can be verybeautiful from the front and
very crappy from the back.
Another house looks crappy fromthe front and has the most
beautiful backyard.
The way that you see thatproperty only depends on your
perspective, and what I do as agood coach is I help you to
(18:12):
change that perspective.
It's still the same house.
That feels like magic becauseit's a tiny moment and within
one moment you change theperspective and the whole world
looks different.
Daniela SM (18:27):
But also you are a very human-centric person, right
?
I would say that that's why youenjoy being coach and helping
and asking questions and helpingand asking questions.
Florian Horning (18:37):
Yeah, I viewed myself as a very analytic person
, a very logical person,somebody looking for and
searching for answers, somebodydividing the world in right and
wrong and good and bad.
I had to come to situationswhere I thought that I did
everything right and I failedwith that and all of a sudden, I
(18:58):
had to rethink what I did aftertraveling to the Sahara.
That was 2013 that I went on afour-week solo Sahara trip that
I just mentioned, with thesatellite telephone.
Before that, I was afraid on myown and I was afraid in the
dark and I had to sleep on myown, completely alone, under the
open sky in the desert.
(19:19):
And after that, a lot of otherthings completely changed and I
was much more easy with it.
I went more with the flow and Ilost the fear of a lot of
unknown because I thought, okay,I will figure it out one way or
another.
(19:39):
And that's the time that Istarted traveling.
I lived on the road with mygirlfriend back then.
We traveled all the way throughEurope again to the Sahara
Desert and back after what'smoved, to the mountains in
Switzerland.
Then she showed me her secondhome because she was very
(20:01):
attached to Tanzania.
Then I started to build a lodgeat the beach in Zanzibar.
So I had this tropical beachand the dolphins every day and
doing these tours on the waterand living this tropical African
life.
I had the lodge for almost fouryears.
I full-time lived in Zanzibarfor one year.
(20:23):
Then I met this world ofbetrayal and corruption and I
lost my lodge through.
We could make two podcasts justabout losing that lodge.
A lot of corruption, peoplejust coming up with a random
story, reporting you to thepolice, the police arresting you
for whatever reason, and thenyou can prove everything and
(20:45):
they say, yeah, that's true, youcan prove everything, but maybe
all of your proof is fake.
And then they say but it's anofficial government stamp.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you knowour government.
You can get every stamp youwant if you pay them the right
money.
And that's how I lost the Lodge.
Then I went back to Switzerland, then bought a boat.
(21:05):
I traveled for a year in a tinywooden boat on the
Mediterranean.
Then I opened a safari companyat Kilimanjaro and had a house
at Kilimanjaro and I did mySerengeti tours that I dreamed
of when I was younger, bought apiece of the national park in
southern Tanzania, and then Imet corruption and betrayal
again and I lost againeverything.
(21:27):
And then I moved full-time on aboat and now I'm living on a
sailing yard on theMediterranean.
Daniela SM (21:31):
Yeah, I can imagine that these things can happen.
Only because I grew up inVenezuela, so I know how
corruption it doesn't surpriseme.
Actually.
It's terrible that happened toyou.
Florian Horning (21:41):
Yes.
Daniela SM (21:42):
What I'm missing here is that so you were helping
people because you lost yourjob as a recruiter and people
were coming to you and then youbecame a coach.
And then from becoming a coachis then, when you started to
travel to the Sahara.
Florian Horning (21:56):
Every day I'm aiming to become a better coach
than yesterday.
However you call it, coaching,mentorship, leadership can
spiral you up and it is verydifficult if you have to grow on
your own.
And it's super helpful if youhave somebody lending you a hand
, inspiring you, asking you thetough questions, questions being
(22:19):
with you when it is difficult.
That is like spark in my in myeyes when I think about that.
I have the chance to motivatesomebody to follow their, their
own dreams.
So I am personally trying to beevery day to become a better
coach than I was yesterday.
So whenever I have the chanceto learn anything about coaching
, I go for that.
(22:40):
So I'm doing my own coachingsand my own coaching trainings
every now and then.
Sometimes I'm learning newtechniques and when you learn
them, you have to practice themon yourself.
So becoming a better coachforced me to ask the tough
questions myself.
And that's when I realized Idon't want to do that.
(23:03):
I don't want to be a coach withan own office in the same city,
waking up in the morning,making my coffee, driving an
hour to my coaching office,spending the day in the computer
, in front of the computer tofill my calendar, and then
having back-to-back coachings.
I wanted to live a life that Idream of In my life.
(23:26):
I love it when I'm outside,when I'm climbing mountains,
when I'm crossing deserts, whenI'm living on my boat.
Normally, I do my coachingsessions on my boat, even my
mastermind sessions.
I have 10 people in the calland I'm sitting somewhere on the
boat.
Normally, I do my coachingsessions on my boat, even my
mastermind sessions.
I have 10 people in the calland I'm sitting somewhere on the
boat.
It's, it's, it's.
It's not a fake background.
That's my life, because Iwanted to create this and this
(23:50):
is coming with a lot ofdownsides.
It's very difficult at timesbecause you're super dependent
on the weather, and still,that's the choice that I made.
This is, this is the life thatI that I love when, in my 20s
and in my early 30s, I was notbrave enough to go for that
choice, because I thought youhave to have a real job, you
(24:13):
need to have a house, you needto have a family, you need to
have a proper income, you needto have a house, you need to
have a family, you need to havea proper income.
You need to have these savingsBecause when you're traveling so
much you can't work or I can'twork 60 hours a week.
That I used to, because allthat travel has to come from
somewhere and they're driving aboat and repairing the boat and
(24:37):
maintaining everything.
It's time consuming as well.
Daniela SM (24:41):
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, wonderful.
Now I'm curious and I don'twant to ask about money but how
do you manage to buy thisbungalow in Africa and the other
one?
You've saved a lot when youwere working as a recruiter as
much as I earn.
Florian Horning (24:58):
I started very slow.
I just invested $1,000 here,$1,000 there.
That wasn't a big deal, and Itook it out of my coaching money
and I thought it's a funproject.
And then I realized, oh, thisis something that I really
(25:19):
really really dreamed of.
And then I moved there All of asudden.
I had almost no fixed costbecause living there is super
cheap.
I kept working as a coach.
I had a big client at that time.
That was the oldest businessschool in the world.
It's called ESCP Europe.
I was in charge of theirinternational alumni career
(25:42):
coaching-wise.
I had to do that on the phoneanyway.
I could do that from Zanzibar,same time zone, super easy.
So I did, like this, spent alot, do that on the phone anyway
.
I could do that from Zanzibar,same time zone, super easy.
So I did, like this, spend alot of time on the phone and in
between I managed everythingthere, kept an eye on where they
spent the money, if they'rereally building this, if they're
really showing up.
I did the whole management ofthe of the lodge at some point.
(26:03):
It's tricky at times, and so atone time the cook left, and so
what did I do?
We had clients there, we hadpeople who wanted to have dinner
, so I did my coaching duringthe day and then I hung up the
phone and I went to the kitchenand I cooked for everybody.
So that's what you have to dowhen you're an entrepreneur, and
(26:24):
if you want something to besuccessful, you have to put your
own heart and your own uh, like, uh, sweat and tears into that.
So that's how I built it up.
It's just bit by bit, by bit bybit, and when it was up and
running, when I lost it and uh,so now it's uh, probably, uh,
it's still it's a tiny project.
So right now it's probablyworth like a quarter of a
(26:46):
million, half a million,something half a million,
something like that, not fromthe money that we put in there,
but from the reputation that itreceived.
Daniela SM (26:54):
And so now it's owned by the government, or who
took it.
Florian Horning (26:56):
No, no, no.
I had a partner, I had abusiness partner there and the
business partner wanted to haveit for himself.
Daniela SM (27:02):
Oh, okay.
Florian Horning (27:16):
And so these ups and downs because of major
things that happen.
Well, you lost several timesyour positions.
Have you decision whether youwill let that determine the rest
of your life or make the choiceto learn something out of that?
The money that I that Ipersonally put in there probably
probably 20 to 30 000 dollarsmoney wise, had I visited a
(27:40):
hotel, school or university andpaid for tuition and everything,
it's probably had spent moreand had less knowledge.
So I try to put it like thisand say, okay, everything that
cost me money is basically alesson that I bought and that I
(28:01):
received.
And now it's up on me whether Ilet that determine the rest of
my life in a good or in a badway.
Daniela SM (28:11):
I like that, that if you have gone to hotel school,
you have spent the same for sure.
Or more my husband and I, wewent to Switzerland for hotel
school.
It would have been more thanthat, yes.
Florian Horning (28:23):
And maybe you know some things better than me,
but I had to figure everythingout while doing it because I
wasn't prepared for that.
And while managing it, Ilearned the construction because
I understood what they weredoing.
And then I started to questionthat.
And then at some point, okay,let me do that myself.
(28:43):
Point, okay, let me do thatmyself.
And when I came back toswitzerland, after we lost that
I, we had the chance to rent ahouse in a skiing resort very,
very cheap, but it was, it wasrun down, was very broken.
Because I had the experiencefrom zanzibar, I thought, okay,
let's meet, let me do it myself.
And I I was completely changingconstruction and everything
(29:04):
myself.
I just, african style, builtthe construction to hold up the
roof and then I changed the, thewalls and everything still
holding up, and it's lookingsuper nice.
After having done that, I hadthe chance to renovate an old
sailboat and everybody that Iknew told me I'm completely
crazy, that boat will never swimagain.
Just figured it out and then Isailed with it through the
(29:28):
Mediterranean for three years.
Had I not done Zanzibar and thehouse in the mountains, I would
have not dared to do that,probably had bought a much more
expensive boat, and by now Iknow if you buy a much more
expensive boat it might hold fora year or two, but when things
(29:50):
start to break and they willalways break on a boat it's much
more expensive.
And then you either have tohave somebody do the job for you
, which is even more expensive,or you learn it the hard way.
So I started with that, workedmyself up and by now I'm very
confident with most of therepairs on a wooden boat and on
(30:10):
an epoxy boat as well, so I'mnot so dependent.
I could give the job away tosomebody else and I would be
able to understand whetherthey're doing a good job or not,
which can save you a lot ofmoney.
Or I could even do that myself,and I love that.
To build something with your ownhands and I need that.
In contrary to my coaching, Ilove talking to people, but at
(30:31):
some point I need to buildsomething myself, because if we
have a good conversation, afteryou hang up you start changing
your job or your relationship oryour life, and things change
for you.
For me, everything is the sameAt some point.
That is exhausting for me.
If I'm dependent, for my ownwell-being on your success.
(30:53):
Then I'm very dependent againand by having my own projects
that are in my own hands andthat I can realize and that I
can build up, and that if I canlive in that project or sail
with that project, it's verysatisfying.
And then I'm getting verydetached from your success and
(31:13):
that is again making me a bettercoach.
If I'm not dependent on youbeing successful, I can go back
and I can stay critical and Ican be the even better coach for
you.
Daniela SM (31:24):
Wow, I love everything you say.
First of all, I want to go backto say that you found a cheap
house in Switzerland.
That's amazing.
I didn't think anything wascheap in Switzerland.
Florian Horning (31:34):
Yeah, yeah.
And we had an agreement withthe landlord.
We got rent free for a coupleof years for doing the
renovation and that wasprice-wise.
That was fine for us doing therenovation, and that was price
wise.
That was that was fine for us.
But then he offered it for saleto us and he went bananas
because, oh, everything'slooking fine.
(31:54):
I was like, yeah, well, it wasme who saved the house.
In the end we went separateways because he wanted to sell
it.
That is a house in germany inthat condition that I found that
was like 50,000, if at all, andhe wanted to have 350,000.
Daniela SM (32:10):
Talking of the Swiss , oh, wow, you know, I
understand you like talking topeople, though I'm introvert and
like I need to recharge on myown.
But I feel like I need to havelittle projects, little things
that you built, not just tickingboxes, because that's what I do
at work.
For example, when I created thepodcast, everything I did it
myself and I had no idea and Ifeel so proud, like I feel like
(32:32):
proudest thing.
Well, there's another one too.
When I was in Switzerland inthe school we had, the yearbooks
were black and white, becausethis is in the nineties.
I was like we are going to havecolor, we're going to put a lot
of pictures, and I had a vision, the whole vision, from the
first page to everything.
Some teachers were like oh no,you don't have any experience.
And some of them believe in meand you know, the owner of the
(32:55):
school was this is the best bookever and this is like, oh my
God.
I feel like I did such anamazing thing Because it was
using your hands, using yourbrain, getting ideas.
Florian Horning (33:12):
And your hands, using your brain, getting ideas
, and the same with the podcast.
I feel like sometimes thoseachievements, for me, are so
much more valuable.
Most of the times that I'mcoaching, I'm coaching around,
so the thing that I'm mostinterested in is if a person has
the feeling that they want tobe where they are not.
So if they have the feelingthat they are not where they
want to be, then somethingobviously is missing.
And to find out what is missingand how you get there Because
(33:36):
if you want to get somewhere,you have to know where you want
to go, and most people just knowwhat they don't want Because
there are so many choices and tofind something that you really
want to work towards, that, Ithink, is super.
That is super interesting.
It's the same inside thecompany.
If you give somebody a raise ora title, something that you
(33:58):
receive one time, and then youtake it for granted.
If you're unsatisfied, thiswill not satisfy.
If you're completely happy withyour job and I give this to you
as recognition it will land,and you will not satisfy.
If you're completely happy withyour job and I give this to you
as recognition it will land andyou will own it from the moment
that you receive the raise orthat you receive the title and
you think, yeah, I own this, Iworked for this in my past and
(34:19):
now I own this.
And if I do a super good job,now I want to have the next
raise or the next title.
Do a super good job, now I wantto have the next race or the
next title.
Most people don't work tomaintain their income or
maintain their title.
They think they deserve that.
If you want them to overachieve, that needs to be the next step
.
Daniela SM (34:39):
The other thing, too , is that people are usually not
paid enough in all levels, sothey do want to raise so that
they can pay bills.
Florian Horning (34:46):
Yeah, and we talked about the motivation.
If you think that you alreadydeserve more, then giving you
the raise is something whichwill not create a lasting new
motivation.
The best case would be thatpeople think that, okay, now I
receive what I deserve, but it'snot a problem of motivation.
So it's much more interestingto talk to people about where do
(35:11):
you want to go, how do you wantto achieve that, so that they
have the feeling that with eachday they come to work and they
achieve something, they aregetting one step closer to where
they want to be.
So that is the creating mysuccess in my job myself.
It's not the job offering me arace once or a new title and
then I have it and then I don'tknow how to go from there.
(35:32):
But if you work on a plan andpeople have the idea they can
create the title or the racethemselves, then they have a
motivation to work towards.
Daniela SM (35:41):
Okay, and so, floor, thinking about all these
stories that you have told me, Ifeel like you are living an
extraordinary, unconventionallife.
You seem to be happy and, ontop of that, you seem to be
giving a lot to the world withyour coaching style and your
building stuff and creating.
Do you agree?
Are you happy?
(36:02):
Do you think you do have theextraordinary life?
Florian Horning (36:05):
Being happy is the most simple and the most
complicated thing in life.
Happiness is not a place to goto.
It's a place to come from.
You won't reach anything in theexternal world and when you
reach that place that title,that reward, that income that
will make you happy Happiness issomething that comes from
(36:29):
within.
If you choose to be happy, thenyou can bring that happiness
into the world, and I have metpeople being super poor and
people super rich, and bothbeing super unhappy or being
super happy.
Happiness is a choice.
(36:49):
I know that.
Sometimes I feel that, but oftenI still slip into my old
patterns and I'm unsatisfied andI'm not happy with that.
I have to remind myself to begrateful and thankful for who I
(37:10):
am.
And as soon as I compare myselfand I think, oh, I should, I
ought to, you have to.
What do other people thinkabout this?
Did you really make the bestout of your life?
Then I'm getting nervous andfrustrated, and I'm not.
What helps is if I think backfive years or ten years.
Think about all the stories andall the experience that I have
(37:33):
accumulated in between.
If somebody had told me thatten years ago, I would not
believe that I'm able to do that, and now I just take it for
granted.
So I think it makes sense ifyou compare yourself every once
in a while with yourselfyesterday and yourself a year
ago and yourself 10 years ago,because right now I'm always
(37:55):
where I am right now and Ialways have the goals lying
ahead of me and they always seemlike a very steep learning
curve.
And when I look back from whereI am right now, I take that for
granted.
But taking yourself back intime and say, okay, imagine 10
years ago that you were the onedoing this and this and this and
(38:15):
achieving this and that, andthat's the moment where I think,
yeah, I like me, I like myself.
Daniela SM (38:22):
All right, keep comparing yourself with yourself
.
Florian Horning (38:25):
All right, keep comparing yourself with
yourself Only person who'sliving your life is you.
The only person having yourthoughts and your dreams and
your feelings and yourcapabilities and your obstacles
in life is you.
Everybody else and this issomething really interesting
Even if you talk to the richestpeople, they have their fears
(38:48):
and they have their struggles.
They are just adding zeros atthe end.
It's just a bit bigger, buteverybody is facing problems
that they think that they don'tknow how to handle, wherever
they are in life.
So if you are looking, ifyou're just comparing my wealth
to somebody else's wealth, or mycoaching reach to somebody
(39:09):
else's, or my coachingexperience to somebody else's, I
can always find somebody who,if it looks from my perspective,
looks like I'm a nobody.
They are not living my life andI'm not living their life
(39:30):
living their life, and they havethe same internal struggles
that I do, because they know allthe other stuff that is going
through their head and throughtheir life.
My life is about managing mylife, so compare yourself to
yourself, thank you.
Daniela SM (39:41):
And so what is up for you in the future?
Florian Horning (39:42):
Any plans, or you say you're always having
steep goals on the one hand, I'mjust adding a a new mastermind,
together with my, with mygirlfriend.
She's a quite a famous sailingvlogger.
Personally thinks she's one ofthe like top 10 solo sailing
women worldwide.
She's very well known for solosailing and now we're sailing
(40:07):
together, so let's see how thatis going to change.
And we have the idea that wewant to help other young,
especially women, who want toleave their nine to five job
behind.
They don't know how, so we arecreating a mastermind coaching
program for them.
I think that we can add so muchvalue because we like men, men
(40:30):
and women, different backgrounds, different income streams,
different set of experiences,different backgrounds, and I
have no idea how to fill that upand how to make that successful
.
So that is like like one biggoal ahead of mine.
Uh, business wise andpersonally, we wanted to sail to
(40:50):
west africa, which is veryuncommon to sail there, so from
europe to the canary islands, tocape verde and then to to
gambia.
Uh, some family issues, so myfather just died two weeks ago
and that, like I had to changeeverything around and focus on
people and not on goals, and nowit's getting a bit late in the
(41:13):
year and I don't know if we aremaking it this year or if we're
making it at all.
And I'm thinking about thisbecause we already promised to
film a whole season for herchannel in West Africa and now
we don't know if we go there.
So it's a difficult and verylong way to sail.
So these are two things thatare very currently on my plate.
(41:36):
No idea how to get there.
Daniela SM (41:39):
And what about pirates?
Are you not afraid of piratesaround that area?
Florian Horning (41:43):
I'm more afraid of the orcas in the Strait of
Gibraltar.
Around that area, I'm moreafraid of the orcas in the
Strait of Gibraltar If you gofurther down, to Liberia, ghana,
towards Nigeria, there are acouple of pirate attacks.
And then on the other side ofAfrica, on Somalia, there are
pirate attacks, but from Morocco, mauritania, senegal, all the
way to Guinea-Bissau there areno.
Daniela SM (42:06):
Okay, and why do you want to go there?
Why that goal?
Florian Horning (42:10):
I still love Africa.
It is very raw, very joyful,especially because it's so hot.
It's much closer to nature.
So in the north, you have totake care for the winter, you
have to have a house, you haveto have the warm clothes, you
have to take care for the winter, you have to have a house, you
have to have the warm clothes,you have to be inside, and in
Africa so much of the life isoutside and is on the streets.
(42:32):
I still love African culture,as long as I don't do business.
Spending the winter there whenit is cold in Europe is super
interesting.
This area is supposed to be oneof the most beautiful sailing
destinies in the world, but it'svery difficult to get back from
there and it has no sailinginfrastructure.
(42:52):
So all the people who want togo on vacation, they go to the
Met, because there you can gofrom one harbor to the other.
There you have to be.
You need to have an offshoreboat, you have to be able to
live on the boat, make your ownwater, have enough storage for
the food and to be able to live.
Quite simple, because you can'tgo to any supermarket.
You can't buy groceries likeyou do here.
(43:14):
You just buy the raw vegetablesand the raw fish if you want to
have some.
I like that because it'sremoving a lot of the artificial
nonsense in typical Europeanlife.
Daniela SM (43:27):
In general, even in North America.
Florian Horning (43:29):
Or in Northern yeah.
Daniela SM (43:30):
All right.
So, flo, thank you so much forsharing your story and thank you
so much for making this happen.
I know how busy you were.
You're such a charismatic guythat since I met you, you
treated me like a friend and socasual.
I love it.
So thank you very much.
I enjoyed the conversation.
Florian Horning (43:47):
Yeah, me too.
Thank you for having me.
Daniela SM (43:50):
Thank you.
I hope you enjoyed today'sepisode.
I am Daniela and you arelistening to, because Everyone
has a Story.
Please take five seconds rightnow and think of somebody in
your life that may enjoy whatyou just heard, or someone that
has a story to be shared andpreserved.
When you think of that person,shoot them a text with the link
(44:11):
of this podcast.
This will allow the ordinarymagic to go further.
Join me next time for anotherstory conversation.
Thank you for listening.
Hasta pronto.
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