October 10, 2024 • 30 mins
Ever wondered what drives someone to get back on a motorcycle after multiple collisions? Meet Gallo, a resilient business owner from Reno, Nevada, who shares his incredible journey from tradesman and bartender to the proud owner of a live music venue called Sucias. Gallo's story is a testament to living life fully, despite the risks, and offers deep insights into the preciousness of pursuing what you love. Through his passion for motorcycle riding, Gallo embodies the spirit of our podcast’s mission: overcoming fear and finding hope and encouragement after injury.
Listen as Gallo recounts a harrowing motorcycle accident that left him with a broken femur and an unexpected hip discovery. Picture the intense crash, the initial shock, and the chaos that ensued, including his wife's frantic phone call and his subsequent blackout. Gallo's honest narrative sheds light on the grueling recovery process post-surgery, touching on the frustrations of hospital routines, pain management, and physical therapy. His candid reflections on the human aspects of recovery, such as maintaining normalcy in daily activities, make his story profoundly relatable.
Toward the end, we explore Gallo’s path to healing and acceptance through alternative therapies like hypnotherapy. Gallo reveals how working with a hypnotherapist helped him manage pain and addiction recovery, emphasizing the power of trust in therapeutic relationships. Highlighting the importance of living without fear, Gallo inspires listeners to consider similar healing paths. We invite you to share your own recovery stories on BedBackBeyond.com, fostering a community of shared experiences and mutual encouragement in the journey toward recovery.
Was this episode helpful to you? If you would like to support my work on the show, you can buy me a coffee at https://buymeacoffee.com/bedbackandbeyond
Have a positive story of recovery to tell? Head over to https://bedbackbeyond.com/share-your-story/ to apply.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I see this pole, this telephone pole, just kind of
come in closer towards me.
And I see it, I'm like, ooh, Ithink I'm going to hit that.
I start trying to swim awayfrom it in the air, like again
this time to slow down, stop,whatever.
And I'm trying to swim in theair away from this.
And I see it getting closer andnow I see it's like about to
hit me, like it looked like itwas going to hit like around my
rib cage, cage for my stomach.
(00:20):
Oh crap.
Well, I never went to Europe, Inever took a cruise.
This is it right and hit thepole blackout.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Welcome to Bed Back and Beyond, sharing positive
stories of recovery from seriousback or neck injury.
Your host is CK, a fellowchampion who draws on her own
experience with herniated discsurgery.
Join her as she talks withothers who have overcome the
(00:52):
physical and emotional trauma ofa painful injury and discover
for yourself how you can findhope and encouragement in
recovery.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Hi Gaio, thank you so much for joining me on this
episode of Bed Back Beyond.
Before we dive into youraccident history, how about you
just introduce yourself?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
Oh hi, I am Gaio.
I am a business owner now Forthe past long-ish time.
I've been a maintenance worker,electrician tradesman, before
that a bartender.
So I've done a little bit ofeverything and can do anything
for a house except tile andmasonry.
Other than that, I'm just hereto have a good time and share my
experience and let everybodyknow.
(01:30):
Hey, there are more than oneparts to your hip.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Yes, found that out the hard way.
So is your business contracting?
Speaker 1 (01:39):
Oh, no, no, no, not a totally different path.
I now own a live music venue,so I'm kind of back into
bartending.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Oh, that's exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
It is stressful, exciting and a money pit, but
still fun.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Where is the?
Where is it located?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
Here in Reno, Nevada.
It's on 4th Street, so if youever come to Reno, swing on by.
Let them know that you heard meon the podcast and I'll get you
in.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
And what's the name of the venue?
Oh, it's called.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Sucias, it's Spanish for dirty girls or naughty girls
, but it's a little nuance, alittle more nuance on that, but
kind of like a how.
In Latin songs, especially likePitbull, he calls women
descaradas, but it's more oflike women being free and
liberated when they go out anddo you know?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
nightclub stuff and then going back to their normal
cells.
You know when the sun shines,wow.
And I think part of yourhobbies was, or is, motorcycle
riding.
Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Yes, still is, even though I've had a lot of
motorcycle accidents collisions,not accidents, but a lot of
collisions never at fault.
I've been in a lot of vehicularcollisions, never been found at
fault because you know someonejust doing something stupid in
front of me.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
And that hasn't dissuaded you from riding
motorcycles.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Not at all.
Like you know, you're going todie.
I mean I could have a heartattack now, you know, in my
sleep, whatever.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Hopefully not.
I won't know how to do that.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Well, no, hopefully not, but anytime, you know,
anyone can die from anything.
Life is short.
I'm a widower as well, and so,realizing how precious life is,
you might as well just enjoy anddo what you want to do.
And yeah, sure, there's alittle fear that something could
happen.
I mean, even if flying inplanes sometimes I'm like, ooh,
that little turbulence is alittle scarier the landing, but
still, you know, there's notgoing to stop me from flying
(03:17):
either.
So just keep doing what youwant to do and, you know, figure
out a way to push through it,at least for myself.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Yeah, you can't live scared.
Exactly, I had a.
I started this podcast becauseI had a herniated disc and had
to have surgery and after thatsurgery you live in this
reherniation fear, and evengetting back to exercising was
so difficult.
So part of the purpose ofstarting the podcast was to help
(03:43):
encourage people to move pastthat fear and get back to moving
and living life again.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Yes, that's, it is important.
I mean, even now I can stillmake my lower spine grind on
each other on certain movementswhenever I do Pilates, like,
okay, I can't lift my leg thathigh, I need to like lower it or
can't push as hard as I want,but yeah there is a chance of
re-injury for anything that youdo.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
So do you mind taking us back to the accident, where
you learned more about your hipand that, oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
So a little backstory .
So I've always bought and soldmotorcycles since I was 22,
23-ish.
I've been riding since I was 12, borrowing friends' motorcycles
or borrowing friends' dirtbikes, and one particular
motorcycle I had.
I'd gotten a bunch of work doneon it and when I traded it in
for a new one, went on a ridewith a buddy of mine and he told
(04:34):
me hey, your back tire is bald.
I'm like, okay, yeah sure, andI just kind of filed it away.
But in my mind I'm like, okay,I just bought this bike and I
did a bunch of work.
I did a bunch of work on theprevious bike, not the one I
just bought.
So in my mind this tire is fine.
So I'm riding with a bald tirefor over a year and one day I'm
taking a turn.
It's a long, sweeping turn, oneof those that say like 35 miles
an hour.
It's on a road, it's not ahighway, it's not a freeway,
(04:58):
it's just one like a back road,san Antonio and tap on the brake
lightly, not slamming on it.
It just kind of slowed myselfdown a little bit and the rear
tire locks up and it slides.
And once it slides off of theconcrete, it serves concrete or
cement, whatever the road ismade of asphalt, whatever hit
the dirt and it just came to adead stop.
It just like flopped over.
(05:19):
But my momentum, because it wasa curve, was still shooting
forward.
So the centrifugal force kindof just shot me outwards and it
was surreal, for it felt liketwo minutes in the air Time,
just kind of stopped and sloweddown.
I'm looking and I see thischain link fence that's in front
of me, since we're by theairport.
It's a super high fence, like12 feet tall, plus barbed wire
on top, and I'm floating in theair towards it.
(05:41):
I see it.
I'm thinking, man, is this goingto be like Resident Evil?
Am I going to get diced up withthis momentum?
Am I going fast enough?
No, because I got bones.
It won't do anything.
I'll get some road rash.
And I see I'm going towards it.
Okay, at this height I'llprobably hit it with enough
force to get thrown underneathit, like be able to push
(06:05):
underneath the fence and gothrough it.
Okay, yeah, the posts are kindof far enough.
I'm kind of in the middle, alittle off, and then I see this
pole, this telephone pole, justkind of come in closer towards
me and I see it.
I'm like, oh, I think I'm gonnahit, that I start trying to
swim away from it in the airlike again, this time is slowed
down, stopped, whatever.
And I'm trying to swim in theair away from this and I see it
getting closer and now I seeit's like about to hit me, like
it looked like it was going tohit, like around my rib cage or
(06:27):
my stomach, like oh crap.
Well, I never went to Europe, Inever took a cruise.
This is it Right and hit thepole blackout.
Then I wake up.
I don't know how long it hadbeen, but long enough for a
bunch of first responders to bearound fire truck, a couple of
(06:47):
cops, an ambulance there and Isee this volunteer fireman in
front of me and he's like, sir,are you okay, are you okay?
And the look on his face kindof told me that there was
something wrong.
But I couldn't tell how bad itwas and I'm like, yeah, I'm good
, and I try to get up.
I push off the ground and Icouldn't feel my legs, like it
just felt like they weren'tthere.
And for half a second is asfast as I could think.
(07:09):
This thought it was gone.
It was like, oh my God, I'mparalyzed, oh shit, I'm going to
die.
Or oh shit, you know, my, Idon't have any legs and calm
down to myself hey, I've donenothing to worry about, let's
figure this out.
So I wiggle my toes Okay, toesare fine.
And my ankle Okay, that works.
And my knees.
My left knee hurts, but notthat bad.
My right knee kind of felt likeit had compression so it was
(07:31):
difficult to move but it wasslow or kind of bruised.
You know, like when you bangyour knee it kind of hurts to
move it at all.
So kind of had that sensation.
Try to lift my left leg.
Okay, I can.
I can feel the muscles moving,but my leg isn't moving and
maybe it's pinned or something.
That's why my left knee hurtsand my right leg.
I try to make my thigh musclesmove.
(07:51):
Nothing, don't feel the muscles, don't feel the leg move.
I just broke my femur.
I'm good, no big deal.
And and the fireman just hasthis look of shock on his face
like Like, uh, he doesn't wantto say anything, but the look of
it kind of says I know you'renot okay.
I'm like, hmm, kind of worried.
Uh, and right at that time, mygirlfriend, or we married at
(08:13):
that time, either fiance orgirlfriend.
Forget when we got married.
No, no, no, we were alreadymarried.
We married in 2015.
So, yeah, she was my wife for ayear.
She was calling me because I wassupposed to pick her up from
getting a car rental and itturned out that, you know, I
couldn't go pick her up.
So I answer the phone like, hey, babe, now everything's fine.
Had a motorcycle accident,don't worry, you're just, you're
(08:36):
going to have to re-rent thecar and come get me.
And I'm over here.
Bunch of firemen at thisintersection.
No big deal, don't worry, calmdown, it's fine, no big deal,
it's just a flesh room, no bigdeal.
And so I hang up and I pass out.
Then I wake up when they'reswitching me from the gurney in
the hospital or from the wait isit the gurney?
(08:57):
Whatever?
The EMTs carry you on andthey're supposed to bring me
over to the bed, and that painin my hip just woke me up and
yeah, so then that's when theystarted doing x-rays and testing
and making sure you're nothaving any internal bleeding,
all this other stuff.
And I saw the x-ray and itbasically I pulled my ilium from
each other and pulled apart.
(09:18):
So all the cartilage from yourilium and your sacrum just was
apart and my hips were just kindof dangling and my right ilium
was kind of tucked in my ribcage.
So I had a drill through myfemur put me in traction to be
able to pull the leg out frombeing tucked under the rib cage.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
So that was a fun experience at what point did you
ask how's my bike?
Speaker 1 (09:41):
um, once I was in the hospital like once, because
another thing is I I had tourinate and I couldn't, like I
was, I was willing to just killover myself.
I had no problem with peeing onmyself.
Hey, at this point I'm in thehospital.
They see all kinds of stuffblood, guts, whatever.
Peeing on myself isn't a bigdeal, but I couldn't.
I didn't have control mybladder, but I could feel.
(10:03):
And once they got the catheterin me and I filled that bag up
instantaneously, they had to putanother bag on After that.
Then I was able to like okay,where's my bike?
Did it get towed, is it, youknow?
No, it's still there.
We got a friend, they picked itup, they loaded on a truck.
We just got to find a place tobe able to unload it.
I don't know how they loaded it,because they didn't have a ramp
(10:24):
, so Cause they didn't have aramp.
So somehow five or six peopleput it on the back of somebody's
truck and then they were tryingto find a place where they
could unload onto a dock andthen write it off.
So yeah, it was probably five,six hours later Once I was like
kind of coherent enough to ask afor my bike and, oddly enough,
all it has was just a littlescuff and dirt on the right
handlebar and bent the rightlever, which is a brake, a front
(10:51):
brake, and so, yeah, it waskind of weird that it just had
minimal damage, just kind of alittle scuffing, not even a
scratch, just dirt, kind of likewedged into the handle.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
And how long were you ?
You got to the hospital, didthey put you into emergency
surgery right away?
Speaker 1 (11:05):
No, that was an observation.
They were making sure that Ididn't have any internal
bleeding, anything going on.
Uh, they scheduled me.
It was friday probably sorry,saturday morning, three or four,
when they finally said, okay,we're gonna schedule for surgery
, and it was first thing mondayat like 6 am.
So 48 hours ish, 40, 50 ishhours before I had my surgery
(11:26):
and it was weird.
Weird because I was fine, itdidn't hurt so long as I didn't
move, or no one bumped the bed,which in a hospital doesn't
happen.
So every few hours I'd getbumped or jostled and it'd kind
of like just shock me awake.
I was always annoyed with thenurses because they'd always
come in and check on you everyfour hours or six hours.
You know every shift and theywouldn't give me a pain
(11:48):
medication.
They'd start off slow with likeibuprofen and then 800, and
then Tylenol, three and thensomething else, and the only
thing that would take the painaway enough for me to fall
asleep was dilaudid and and sothat you know I take it.
I'd be out within a few secondsand but because of the
scheduling for the painmedication, I would get about an
hour sleep before they comecheck on me again.
(12:10):
I say hey, look, can you checkon me at the end of the shift,
or can you give me the dilaudidwhen you check on me, so that
way I can get at least fourhours of sleep, because that was
the only sleep I was gettingthat time.
And they're like oh no, wecan't do that.
Look, you can see my chart.
You give me all this painmedication.
The only time time I fallasleep is I lauded at uh,
between midnight and two, Idon't know the time, but I know
it was like late at night, theevening shift, and then they
(12:32):
come wake me up at four becausethey had whatever going on.
It's like I'm willing to waittill 4am to get that shot.
Just please let me get somesleep.
Um, and it took like anotherday.
It was after the surgery andthen they kind of started doing
that.
But yeah, that was frustratingto say the least.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Yeah, I had to spend three nights in the hospital
after my disc surgery and therewas barely any sleeping.
The number of times they comethrough the night, how long did
you stay in the hospital?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
The hospital surgery was Monday.
Then they sent me to a physicaltherapy rehab thing where I was
still kind of like an inpatient.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
And.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think it was Tuesday or Monday afternoon,
tuesday morning when they sentme over and by Friday I was
discharged.
I was rolling around in awheelchair and fortunately I was
working for Amazon at the time,had a short-term disability, so
that kind of covered me andcovered a lot of expenses while
I was out.
Um was given a at first beforethe surgery.
(13:35):
I think it was like a three or6% chance of walking again after
the surgery.
It was under 25, like 10 to 20,somewhere in there.
Um, and I was like okay, myprimary concern was like okay,
can I have sex?
That was like that's all Iconcern was like okay, can I
have sex?
That was like that's all Icared about.
I don't care if I can't walk,but can I have sex?
They're like, uh, if it works,we don't know that.
That's kind of we can't checkthat.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yeah, that comes up a lot in the micro discectomy.
Uh, the herniated disc forumsLike when can I have sex again?
Like you herniated a disc.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Yeah, that for sure you don't want to mess with.
But I mean I just lay there andyou do all the work, kind of
turn to the side, whatever.
But yeah, after that was goingthrough physical therapy doing
it.
Well, it wasn't a wheelchairusing crutches and walking, it
was about six, seven months.
I was supposed to be able towalk.
Once they saw that my progress,they said, yeah, you'll be
(14:27):
walking in six months, but I wasup in about by four months.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
But the downside to all of it is that I was in a
constant level.
Eight pain like 24, seven.
Yeah, I thought it was a nineuntil I had a kidney stone Like
nope, nope, kidney stone's a lotworse.
This is an eight, so Ireadjusted my pain threshold, uh
(14:53):
, but from 2016.
Yeah, my perspective from 2016through 2021.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
It was 24, 7 level 8 pain wow that many years.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Yeah, so you can see like under my eyes they're still
kind of dark.
They used to be darker like the.
The darkness under my eyes usedto come like all the way around
circle the whole thing, causeI'd only sleep roughly about an
hour to one to five hours perweek.
Pain would always keep me up.
So when I would finally be ableto fall asleep, any movement
like if I turned in my sleep itwould wake me up.
(15:19):
Or if I had to go pee in themiddle of the night, which was a
constant thing until recently Irealized, oh, if I add some
salt to my water, it'll give meproper hydration and I'm going
to be able to hold it the wholenight.
And so what I would dosometimes is take at least in
Nevada it's a THC legal state Iwould get CBG and CBN to reduce
(15:41):
the pain and help me fall asleep.
But all CBD products usuallyhave THC because you get them
from the dispensary, so theyhave a little bit in there, and
so that would help me kind ofrelax and then fall asleep and
stay asleep a little bit longer.
And in 2021, during my podcastthat I had years ago it's
already gone, don't worry aboutit.
Don't try to find it, it'sdeleted.
(16:07):
But anyways, I had ahypnotherapist that came on and
gave me a therapy session totake away the pain or turn it
down, and within the 20 minutesession I went from a constant
eight to like a dull one or two.
It's still kind of constant,but it's not as bad as being
living with an eight all thetime.
A one is tolerable.
And so right afterwards I wasable to squat, like do an Asian
squat, you know ass to theground, you know turn around
while I'm.
Or you know shake my hips whileI was squatted standing up, did
(16:30):
a jumping jack, and it was likeI felt like 15 years old again,
just being able to move, be allspry.
And since then I've been fine,but getting better night's sleep
, although now it's frustratingbecause now I'm sleeping four to
six hours a night and I gotused to being up so long that I
had more projects that I coulddo.
So now I'm like I could bedoing something, but no, I got
to sleep because I'm so tired.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
Yeah, so what exactly did you learn about the anatomy
of your hip then?
Because a lot of us just thinkthe leg is like you said the leg
is stuck to the hip and that'sabout it.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah, I thought the hip was just one big bone that
was right there and it know,just one big fusion and your
spine attaches it to it likeyou're.
You're at least like in um notanatomy, but uh skeletons.
You see at uh halloween timefor decorations.
The spine is attached to the umpelvic bone.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Yeah to the pelvic bone.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
It's not like the spine if you look at the but
then if you watch a predatormovie, you see the whole spine
and the tailbone standing outthere.
So in reality they should takethe whole spine and take it off
at the hip, or take the hip outtoo, like that way we have a
better idea of what the hip boneis.
But yeah.
I found out the hard way thatit's kind of fused all together
with some cartilage.
Yeah, not fun Find out.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Do you know what they did in the surgery?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Oh yes, so they um had to readjust and put
everything back near its place.
I have two bolts going throughmy ilium into my sacrum, and
then I have a a small plateright over my pelvic or pubic
bone, and so I have I had alittle C-section scar.
So what I would do is purposely,uh, trim down there and then
(18:06):
wear my bathing suits a littlelower.
So you see it that I mess withpeople.
Yeah, I'm trans.
They do like no, no, no, so orI had a kid.
Yeah, my kid, he's 22.
Well, people know I have a kid.
So he's 20, 25, 26, somewherethere.
He's old, he's out of the house.
(18:28):
I don't care um, but yeah, sohe's an adult.
And yeah, I had a kid andthat's my c-section scarred.
People look at me like wait,what?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
no, no no you're not really oh, I can kind of see it
like shut up.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
So wow so, but you have gotten back onto a bike
since the oh yeah the surgeryyeah, oh yeah, oddly, every
motorcycle accident has kind ofincreased my um protection level
.
So my first motorcycle accidentwas kind of increased my
protection level.
So my first motorcycle accidentwas head on with an 18 wheeler
no helmet, no leathers, no,nothing.
I was in about 30 miles an hourand he cut in front of me doing
(18:58):
a left hand turn and all I hadfrom that was like a little scar
over my eye or, yeah, stillhave a scar over one of my eyes
and some road rash in my forearm.
So each accident I've had orcollision that I've had, I've
gone from no helmet to a noveltyhelmet, to a half helmet, three
quarters Modular, which is flipup full face and wearing
(19:22):
leathers.
And then also now I go to likethe Kevlar stuff because they
last longer, you can insulatethem, you can layer them better
Leather if it gets wet, you'reSOL.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
So after the surgery and you moved to rehab I think
you said you were only in therefor a couple of weeks in the
rehab.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
No, I was there five days.
I got out the following Friday,so my accident was one Friday.
By the following Friday I wasout on a wheelchair and moving
myself around.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Okay, and how much time did you spend in the
wheelchair?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Ooh, I want to say maybe two months, and I was
pushing it early with crutches.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Because we live near kind of the bar district area in
San Antonio or the St Mary'sStrip and so I could crutch my
way there, but then I would wearmyself out and then I have to
like take a break for about anhour before I started dancing
with my crutches.
I'd have one crutch and kind oflean on it and dance with my
wife, and I kind of made afriend with one of the DJs that
we still communicate with nowfrom time to time.
(20:22):
So anytime I go into town Ialways go find out when one of
his sets are at and I go dancewith him and, um, but yeah, it's
uh, about three months I thinkI was back crutches and then, by
four months, I was walking.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Wow, and are you to this day, still doing specific
exercises for your uh hip?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Uh no, I just kind of do Pilates just in general, to
more for flexibility and beingable to move.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
now that I'm old, I'm Gen X, so everything is I can
tell by the movie referencesthat you've-.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Yeah, it's not as easy to move around as much as
I'd like.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Okay, how on earth did you think of finding a
hypnotist to help you with thepain?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Well, actually I didn't.
So my podcast was a little bitof everything.
Uh, it was specifically becauseI am a former recovering
intercourse addict and so havingpeople in that kind of realm,
um, you know, sex counselors,licensed family therapists, porn
stars, uh, other addictions andthen just random people that we
(21:25):
just wanted to know anythingabout life, a little bit of life
advice, but also dating,coaching and kind of all in that
realm.
And in that I just have randompeople on from time to time
because I go to podcast guestexchange.
I'm like I don't want to do asolo episode today.
I need to find someone.
And there's a hypnotherapist onthere.
They're like, hey, you know, ifanybody wants to, you know I'm
(21:47):
this, this is my certifications,this is my background.
I'm like, oh yeah, sure, whynot Give it a shot?
Let's go.
And I had him on a couple oftimes.
There was a movie shortly afterI had him on on Netflix about a
hypnotherapist.
He kind of came on to try todebunk that like, hey, you
(22:09):
cannot do that.
You have to have a level oftrust with a therapist.
You're not.
Their therapist can't make youdo something that you're not
already willing to do or willingto try, so they can't tell you,
okay, you're going to killsomeone.
If you hear red rum, 77 orwhatever, like, you have to want
to do that and you, you knowthat would be um, it has to be
something that you would dowhile you're drunk, like, if you
(22:31):
would do it while you're drunkor inebriated, then it's
possible that hypnotherapistscould get you to do it.
But, uh, if you're drunk,you're not going to go out and
kill someone, either.
You're going to grope someone,be get into a fight.
You know the, the happy, sad,angry, drunk.
You know one of those three,whatever is in your in your
nature, whatever your ego, oneof those subconscious, whatever
(22:52):
is your most inclined to do.
It's possible, but still youhave to have that level of trust
in the therapist.
Speaker 3 (22:58):
And it was just one session and it worked, or did
you have to.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
We had two other sessions.
I forgot what the sessions were.
I have to look at the notes,but it was.
The third session was when wedid the pain.
I forgot what the other one twowere.
Ooh, and my memory is badbecause of all the collisions.
So really, anything prior to2016 is really fuzzy and unless
I journaled about it or have apost about it, I'm like I didn't
(23:23):
do that.
That doesn't sound like me.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
Wow.
So one of the things doctorstalk about is the brain pain
connection and how our brainswill still think our body's in
pain when technically it's not,and that's something a lot of
herniated disc and surgerypatients deal with is thinking
that they're still in pain whenthey're really not, and so it
(23:47):
just affects quality of life.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Oh, yeah, yeah, I, I, I can totally attest to that,
especially with the hypnotherapy.
You tell me hey, just turn itdown.
You know kind of calm, relaxing.
This is where we are.
We're in a for me specificallykind of designed, that I'm in a
control room.
We're going to turn down theknob, we're going to turn that
pain down from nine to one andby the time we were done like it
was just oh, my God, it wasamazing.
I said I should have found thissooner.
(24:11):
Um, because a lot ofhypnotherapists you kind of have
a bad rap or they either do ashtick for like a show to get
people to act silly on stage, ormost of the service they do is
either like smoking cessation orkind of working out or a body
image.
But this guy he actually workswith, um, uh, body dysmorphia
stuff, especially for peoplethat are trans or can't afford
to do the conversion therapy.
(24:32):
This tells them, hey, you'reokay with your body, your body
doesn't represent who you are,but you are still you, you are
still a valid person and I don'tknow everything he shares or
does specifically with hispatients, but he does work with
you know variety of things tohelp people have that connection
between, like you say, with thepain, body connection you know,
with your mind and your body.
(24:53):
Because we assume, generallyspeaking, or at least for myself
, I assume I am me, this, likewhat you see, that's who I am,
when in reality I am my brain,the way I say it, or I've seen
it somewhere else is like I'm abrain controlling a skeleton
mech body with meat armor, andthat is more accurate of a
(25:14):
representation of who we are asfar as our mind and our ideas of
ourself.
But a lot of times we associateourself, our identity, as who
we appear outside and we have adisconnect and especially like
with trans, they have adisconnect with who they are on
the inside versus how they showon the outside.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Yeah, Did going through this accident and the
hospital stay make you falterwith your addiction at all?
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Oh no, no, no, so that my intercourse addiction
I'd already recovered through itby 2012.
So I realized I was one in 2011and kind of fought, like I mean
, it's not a bad thing, I mean,it's just sex, it's not a big
deal, but it ruined a lot ofrelationships.
I didn't treat women well.
I objectified them, subjectedthem constantly and to me women
(26:03):
were disposable.
Um, if you're listening to this,watch the video and you can see
that I kind of present as likea typical bad boy and a lot of
women roughly four out of fiveI'm that preference.
Um, you know, some women willadmit to it, most women will not
, and a few, yes, they have noproblem admitting.
Yeah, that's what they like.
But then again there's otherwomen that like clean cut.
(26:27):
They have a preference forblack or white or whatever
ethnicity, whatever theirpreference is.
So that's where it's um would beharder for me to move in that
area.
And so for me, because so manywomen have that preference or
type or fetish, whatever youwant to call it, it was easy for
me to just pick up women and ofcourse I'm not sleeping with
great looking women all the time.
Back then it was just whateverI could get, I didn't care, as
long as it wasn't more than 24hours.
(26:49):
You know I'll go with anybody.
And so then I really learned tokind of value myself, not use
sex as a coping mechanism to getrid of or deal with whatever I
didn't want to face, because asguys we're not taught to deal
with emotions Like other thanhappy, angry or sad.
We don't know what we're feeling, we don't know how to express
(27:10):
it, and if we do, we get introuble because, you know, it's
usually some type of fight orconfrontation, and so that
helped me be better with who Iam as a person.
When my wife passed away, Ikind of did slip and falter for
a few weeks, but the accidentitself, no, it wasn't an issue.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Okay, and did you learn anything about yourself
because of the accident?
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Oh no, I didn't have.
I didn't have any epiphanies orany learning moments other than
other than the hip, likelearning how the anatomy of the
hip the hard way.
Yeah, other than that, no, Ithink it was just kind of a
realization to take better careof my bike too, Like pay
attention, not just the oilchange.
You got to check the otherthings too.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
Yeah and no like PTSD getting back on the bike, no.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
I'm like the really prototypical Gen X, like you
know.
Just rub some dirt on it andkeep going Like that's it.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
I'm afraid I did not act too.
Gen X-y, when I herniated mydisc I lived in like it really
caused some PTSD after surgery,like cause every little sharp
pain that you feel when you'rerecovering.
You think did I justre-herniate?
So I was a blubbering mess.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Well, give.
I mean mean, if you're stilldealing with pain, give
hypnotherapy a try.
Um, oh crap, I forgot his name,but it's twin ravens something
and he's out of la now.
He was in alabama or arkansassomewhere, but uh, twin ravens
therapy, he's based out of la.
He does zoom calls.
It works over zoom, it worksfine.
And yeah, like he's, he'shelping with a lot of things.
Well, three things the.
(28:46):
I forgot the other two.
Maybe he told me not toremember it, I don't know.
That's possible I think it waslike working out and then like
goals and then the pain.
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
I had a question and went right out of my brain.
Great, I had a question and itwent right out of my brain.
That's okay.
What was I going to ask you,holy cow?
Oh, I know what's your bikepreference.
Do you have a particular style,or?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
brand Cruiser, it was Victory.
But then they kind of wentdefunct and eventually became
Indian.
So if I get another bike itmight be an Indian next.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
Okay, great.
Well, do you have anything elseyou'd like to share with the
listeners before we wrap up?
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, if you're suffering through any type of
pain, whatever PTSD you've gotin the past, give him anotherapy
a try.
I can't vouch for anybody else,but I do know this Twin Ravens
guy.
He helped me out.
He's been on several podcasts.
He's on podcast guest exchangeevery now and again Not so much
now that he's a little more busybut tell him, gaius sent you
(29:47):
and maybe you'll get a discount.
I don't know, I haven't usedhim in a while, but yeah, he's a
great guy.
He used to be a tattoo artist.
And don't be afraid to liveyour life, because living in
fear is not living.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Yeah, absolutely Gaius.
Thank you so much for agreeingto just do this podcast and
share your injury story with us.
If you are a listener and youhave a positive story of
recovery, head over toBedBackBeyondcom and click share
your story.
I would love to include yourvoice on the show.
Once again, thank you so muchyou.
I see this pole, this telephone pole, just kind of
come in closer towards me.
And I see it, I'm like, ooh, Ithink I'm going to hit that.
I start trying to swim awayfrom it in the air, like again
this time to slow down, stop,whatever.
And I'm trying to swim in theair away from this.
And I see it getting closer andnow I see it's like about to
hit me, like it looked like itwas going to hit like around my
rib cage, cage for my stomach.
(00:20):
Oh crap.
Well, I never went to Europe, Inever took a cruise.
This is it right and hit thepole blackout.
Speaker 2 (00:32):
Welcome to Bed Back and Beyond, sharing positive
stories of recovery from seriousback or neck injury.
Your host is CK, a fellowchampion who draws on her own
experience with herniated discsurgery.
Join her as she talks withothers who have overcome the
(00:52):
physical and emotional trauma ofa painful injury and discover
for yourself how you can findhope and encouragement in
recovery.
Speaker 3 (01:00):
Hi Gaio, thank you so much for joining me on this
episode of Bed Back Beyond.
Before we dive into youraccident history, how about you
just introduce yourself?
Speaker 1 (01:10):
Oh hi, I am Gaio.
I am a business owner now Forthe past long-ish time.
I've been a maintenance worker,electrician tradesman, before
that a bartender.
So I've done a little bit ofeverything and can do anything
for a house except tile andmasonry.
Other than that, I'm just hereto have a good time and share my
experience and let everybodyknow.
(01:30):
Hey, there are more than oneparts to your hip.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
Yes, found that out the hard way.
So is your business contracting?
Speaker 1 (01:39):
Oh, no, no, no, not a totally different path.
I now own a live music venue,so I'm kind of back into
bartending.
Speaker 3 (01:47):
Oh, that's exciting.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
It is stressful, exciting and a money pit, but
still fun.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Where is the?
Where is it located?
Speaker 1 (01:55):
Here in Reno, Nevada.
It's on 4th Street, so if youever come to Reno, swing on by.
Let them know that you heard meon the podcast and I'll get you
in.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
And what's the name of the venue?
Oh, it's called.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Sucias, it's Spanish for dirty girls or naughty girls
, but it's a little nuance, alittle more nuance on that, but
kind of like a how.
In Latin songs, especially likePitbull, he calls women
descaradas, but it's more oflike women being free and
liberated when they go out anddo you know?
Speaker 3 (02:25):
nightclub stuff and then going back to their normal
cells.
You know when the sun shines,wow.
And I think part of yourhobbies was, or is, motorcycle
riding.
Is that correct?
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Yes, still is, even though I've had a lot of
motorcycle accidents collisions,not accidents, but a lot of
collisions never at fault.
I've been in a lot of vehicularcollisions, never been found at
fault because you know someonejust doing something stupid in
front of me.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
And that hasn't dissuaded you from riding
motorcycles.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Not at all.
Like you know, you're going todie.
I mean I could have a heartattack now, you know, in my
sleep, whatever.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Hopefully not.
I won't know how to do that.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
Well, no, hopefully not, but anytime, you know,
anyone can die from anything.
Life is short.
I'm a widower as well, and so,realizing how precious life is,
you might as well just enjoy anddo what you want to do.
And yeah, sure, there's alittle fear that something could
happen.
I mean, even if flying inplanes sometimes I'm like, ooh,
that little turbulence is alittle scarier the landing, but
still, you know, there's notgoing to stop me from flying
(03:17):
either.
So just keep doing what youwant to do and, you know, figure
out a way to push through it,at least for myself.
Speaker 3 (03:23):
Yeah, you can't live scared.
Exactly, I had a.
I started this podcast becauseI had a herniated disc and had
to have surgery and after thatsurgery you live in this
reherniation fear, and evengetting back to exercising was
so difficult.
So part of the purpose ofstarting the podcast was to help
(03:43):
encourage people to move pastthat fear and get back to moving
and living life again.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
Yes, that's, it is important.
I mean, even now I can stillmake my lower spine grind on
each other on certain movementswhenever I do Pilates, like,
okay, I can't lift my leg thathigh, I need to like lower it or
can't push as hard as I want,but yeah there is a chance of
re-injury for anything that youdo.
Speaker 3 (04:06):
So do you mind taking us back to the accident, where
you learned more about your hipand that, oh yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:13):
So a little backstory .
So I've always bought and soldmotorcycles since I was 22,
23-ish.
I've been riding since I was 12, borrowing friends' motorcycles
or borrowing friends' dirtbikes, and one particular
motorcycle I had.
I'd gotten a bunch of work doneon it and when I traded it in
for a new one, went on a ridewith a buddy of mine and he told
(04:34):
me hey, your back tire is bald.
I'm like, okay, yeah sure, andI just kind of filed it away.
But in my mind I'm like, okay,I just bought this bike and I
did a bunch of work.
I did a bunch of work on theprevious bike, not the one I
just bought.
So in my mind this tire is fine.
So I'm riding with a bald tirefor over a year and one day I'm
taking a turn.
It's a long, sweeping turn, oneof those that say like 35 miles
an hour.
It's on a road, it's not ahighway, it's not a freeway,
(04:58):
it's just one like a back road,san Antonio and tap on the brake
lightly, not slamming on it.
It just kind of slowed myselfdown a little bit and the rear
tire locks up and it slides.
And once it slides off of theconcrete, it serves concrete or
cement, whatever the road ismade of asphalt, whatever hit
the dirt and it just came to adead stop.
It just like flopped over.
(05:19):
But my momentum, because it wasa curve, was still shooting
forward.
So the centrifugal force kindof just shot me outwards and it
was surreal, for it felt liketwo minutes in the air Time,
just kind of stopped and sloweddown.
I'm looking and I see thischain link fence that's in front
of me, since we're by theairport.
It's a super high fence, like12 feet tall, plus barbed wire
on top, and I'm floating in theair towards it.
(05:41):
I see it.
I'm thinking, man, is this goingto be like Resident Evil?
Am I going to get diced up withthis momentum?
Am I going fast enough?
No, because I got bones.
It won't do anything.
I'll get some road rash.
And I see I'm going towards it.
Okay, at this height I'llprobably hit it with enough
force to get thrown underneathit, like be able to push
(06:05):
underneath the fence and gothrough it.
Okay, yeah, the posts are kindof far enough.
I'm kind of in the middle, alittle off, and then I see this
pole, this telephone pole, justkind of come in closer towards
me and I see it.
I'm like, oh, I think I'm gonnahit, that I start trying to
swim away from it in the airlike again, this time is slowed
down, stopped, whatever.
And I'm trying to swim in theair away from this and I see it
getting closer and now I seeit's like about to hit me, like
it looked like it was going tohit, like around my rib cage or
(06:27):
my stomach, like oh crap.
Well, I never went to Europe, Inever took a cruise.
This is it Right and hit thepole blackout.
Then I wake up.
I don't know how long it hadbeen, but long enough for a
bunch of first responders to bearound fire truck, a couple of
(06:47):
cops, an ambulance there and Isee this volunteer fireman in
front of me and he's like, sir,are you okay, are you okay?
And the look on his face kindof told me that there was
something wrong.
But I couldn't tell how bad itwas and I'm like, yeah, I'm good
, and I try to get up.
I push off the ground and Icouldn't feel my legs, like it
just felt like they weren'tthere.
And for half a second is asfast as I could think.
(07:09):
This thought it was gone.
It was like, oh my God, I'mparalyzed, oh shit, I'm going to
die.
Or oh shit, you know, my, Idon't have any legs and calm
down to myself hey, I've donenothing to worry about, let's
figure this out.
So I wiggle my toes Okay, toesare fine.
And my ankle Okay, that works.
And my knees.
My left knee hurts, but notthat bad.
My right knee kind of felt likeit had compression so it was
(07:31):
difficult to move but it wasslow or kind of bruised.
You know, like when you bangyour knee it kind of hurts to
move it at all.
So kind of had that sensation.
Try to lift my left leg.
Okay, I can.
I can feel the muscles moving,but my leg isn't moving and
maybe it's pinned or something.
That's why my left knee hurtsand my right leg.
I try to make my thigh musclesmove.
(07:51):
Nothing, don't feel the muscles, don't feel the leg move.
I just broke my femur.
I'm good, no big deal.
And and the fireman just hasthis look of shock on his face
like Like, uh, he doesn't wantto say anything, but the look of
it kind of says I know you'renot okay.
I'm like, hmm, kind of worried.
Uh, and right at that time, mygirlfriend, or we married at
(08:13):
that time, either fiance orgirlfriend.
Forget when we got married.
No, no, no, we were alreadymarried.
We married in 2015.
So, yeah, she was my wife for ayear.
She was calling me because I wassupposed to pick her up from
getting a car rental and itturned out that, you know, I
couldn't go pick her up.
So I answer the phone like, hey, babe, now everything's fine.
Had a motorcycle accident,don't worry, you're just, you're
(08:36):
going to have to re-rent thecar and come get me.
And I'm over here.
Bunch of firemen at thisintersection.
No big deal, don't worry, calmdown, it's fine, no big deal,
it's just a flesh room, no bigdeal.
And so I hang up and I pass out.
Then I wake up when they'reswitching me from the gurney in
the hospital or from the wait isit the gurney?
(08:57):
Whatever?
The EMTs carry you on andthey're supposed to bring me
over to the bed, and that painin my hip just woke me up and
yeah, so then that's when theystarted doing x-rays and testing
and making sure you're nothaving any internal bleeding,
all this other stuff.
And I saw the x-ray and itbasically I pulled my ilium from
each other and pulled apart.
(09:18):
So all the cartilage from yourilium and your sacrum just was
apart and my hips were just kindof dangling and my right ilium
was kind of tucked in my ribcage.
So I had a drill through myfemur put me in traction to be
able to pull the leg out frombeing tucked under the rib cage.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
So that was a fun experience at what point did you
ask how's my bike?
Speaker 1 (09:41):
um, once I was in the hospital like once, because
another thing is I I had tourinate and I couldn't, like I
was, I was willing to just killover myself.
I had no problem with peeing onmyself.
Hey, at this point I'm in thehospital.
They see all kinds of stuffblood, guts, whatever.
Peeing on myself isn't a bigdeal, but I couldn't.
I didn't have control mybladder, but I could feel.
(10:03):
And once they got the catheterin me and I filled that bag up
instantaneously, they had to putanother bag on After that.
Then I was able to like okay,where's my bike?
Did it get towed, is it, youknow?
No, it's still there.
We got a friend, they picked itup, they loaded on a truck.
We just got to find a place tobe able to unload it.
I don't know how they loaded it,because they didn't have a ramp
(10:24):
, so Cause they didn't have aramp.
So somehow five or six peopleput it on the back of somebody's
truck and then they were tryingto find a place where they
could unload onto a dock andthen write it off.
So yeah, it was probably five,six hours later Once I was like
kind of coherent enough to ask afor my bike and, oddly enough,
all it has was just a littlescuff and dirt on the right
handlebar and bent the rightlever, which is a brake, a front
(10:51):
brake, and so, yeah, it waskind of weird that it just had
minimal damage, just kind of alittle scuffing, not even a
scratch, just dirt, kind of likewedged into the handle.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
And how long were you ?
You got to the hospital, didthey put you into emergency
surgery right away?
Speaker 1 (11:05):
No, that was an observation.
They were making sure that Ididn't have any internal
bleeding, anything going on.
Uh, they scheduled me.
It was friday probably sorry,saturday morning, three or four,
when they finally said, okay,we're gonna schedule for surgery
, and it was first thing mondayat like 6 am.
So 48 hours ish, 40, 50 ishhours before I had my surgery
(11:26):
and it was weird.
Weird because I was fine, itdidn't hurt so long as I didn't
move, or no one bumped the bed,which in a hospital doesn't
happen.
So every few hours I'd getbumped or jostled and it'd kind
of like just shock me awake.
I was always annoyed with thenurses because they'd always
come in and check on you everyfour hours or six hours.
You know every shift and theywouldn't give me a pain
(11:48):
medication.
They'd start off slow with likeibuprofen and then 800, and
then Tylenol, three and thensomething else, and the only
thing that would take the painaway enough for me to fall
asleep was dilaudid and and sothat you know I take it.
I'd be out within a few secondsand but because of the
scheduling for the painmedication, I would get about an
hour sleep before they comecheck on me again.
(12:10):
I say hey, look, can you checkon me at the end of the shift,
or can you give me the dilaudidwhen you check on me, so that
way I can get at least fourhours of sleep, because that was
the only sleep I was gettingthat time.
And they're like oh no, wecan't do that.
Look, you can see my chart.
You give me all this painmedication.
The only time time I fallasleep is I lauded at uh,
between midnight and two, Idon't know the time, but I know
it was like late at night, theevening shift, and then they
(12:32):
come wake me up at four becausethey had whatever going on.
It's like I'm willing to waittill 4am to get that shot.
Just please let me get somesleep.
Um, and it took like anotherday.
It was after the surgery andthen they kind of started doing
that.
But yeah, that was frustratingto say the least.
Speaker 3 (12:48):
Yeah, I had to spend three nights in the hospital
after my disc surgery and therewas barely any sleeping.
The number of times they comethrough the night, how long did
you stay in the hospital?
Speaker 1 (13:00):
The hospital surgery was Monday.
Then they sent me to a physicaltherapy rehab thing where I was
still kind of like an inpatient.
Speaker 3 (13:11):
And.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
I think it was Tuesday or Monday afternoon,
tuesday morning when they sentme over and by Friday I was
discharged.
I was rolling around in awheelchair and fortunately I was
working for Amazon at the time,had a short-term disability, so
that kind of covered me andcovered a lot of expenses while
I was out.
Um was given a at first beforethe surgery.
(13:35):
I think it was like a three or6% chance of walking again after
the surgery.
It was under 25, like 10 to 20,somewhere in there.
Um, and I was like okay, myprimary concern was like okay,
can I have sex?
That was like that's all Iconcern was like okay, can I
have sex?
That was like that's all Icared about.
I don't care if I can't walk,but can I have sex?
They're like, uh, if it works,we don't know that.
That's kind of we can't checkthat.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Yeah, that comes up a lot in the micro discectomy.
Uh, the herniated disc forumsLike when can I have sex again?
Like you herniated a disc.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Yeah, that for sure you don't want to mess with.
But I mean I just lay there andyou do all the work, kind of
turn to the side, whatever.
But yeah, after that was goingthrough physical therapy doing
it.
Well, it wasn't a wheelchairusing crutches and walking, it
was about six, seven months.
I was supposed to be able towalk.
Once they saw that my progress,they said, yeah, you'll be
(14:27):
walking in six months, but I wasup in about by four months.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (14:32):
But the downside to all of it is that I was in a
constant level.
Eight pain like 24, seven.
Yeah, I thought it was a nineuntil I had a kidney stone Like
nope, nope, kidney stone's a lotworse.
This is an eight, so Ireadjusted my pain threshold, uh
(14:53):
, but from 2016.
Yeah, my perspective from 2016through 2021.
Speaker 3 (14:57):
It was 24, 7 level 8 pain wow that many years.
Speaker 1 (14:58):
Yeah, so you can see like under my eyes they're still
kind of dark.
They used to be darker like the.
The darkness under my eyes usedto come like all the way around
circle the whole thing, causeI'd only sleep roughly about an
hour to one to five hours perweek.
Pain would always keep me up.
So when I would finally be ableto fall asleep, any movement
like if I turned in my sleep itwould wake me up.
(15:19):
Or if I had to go pee in themiddle of the night, which was a
constant thing until recently Irealized, oh, if I add some
salt to my water, it'll give meproper hydration and I'm going
to be able to hold it the wholenight.
And so what I would dosometimes is take at least in
Nevada it's a THC legal state Iwould get CBG and CBN to reduce
(15:41):
the pain and help me fall asleep.
But all CBD products usuallyhave THC because you get them
from the dispensary, so theyhave a little bit in there, and
so that would help me kind ofrelax and then fall asleep and
stay asleep a little bit longer.
And in 2021, during my podcastthat I had years ago it's
already gone, don't worry aboutit.
Don't try to find it, it'sdeleted.
(16:07):
But anyways, I had ahypnotherapist that came on and
gave me a therapy session totake away the pain or turn it
down, and within the 20 minutesession I went from a constant
eight to like a dull one or two.
It's still kind of constant,but it's not as bad as being
living with an eight all thetime.
A one is tolerable.
And so right afterwards I wasable to squat, like do an Asian
squat, you know ass to theground, you know turn around
while I'm.
Or you know shake my hips whileI was squatted standing up, did
(16:30):
a jumping jack, and it was likeI felt like 15 years old again,
just being able to move, be allspry.
And since then I've been fine,but getting better night's sleep
, although now it's frustratingbecause now I'm sleeping four to
six hours a night and I gotused to being up so long that I
had more projects that I coulddo.
So now I'm like I could bedoing something, but no, I got
to sleep because I'm so tired.
Speaker 3 (16:51):
Yeah, so what exactly did you learn about the anatomy
of your hip then?
Because a lot of us just thinkthe leg is like you said the leg
is stuck to the hip and that'sabout it.
Speaker 1 (17:01):
Yeah, I thought the hip was just one big bone that
was right there and it know,just one big fusion and your
spine attaches it to it likeyou're.
You're at least like in um notanatomy, but uh skeletons.
You see at uh halloween timefor decorations.
The spine is attached to the umpelvic bone.
Speaker 3 (17:19):
Yeah to the pelvic bone.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
It's not like the spine if you look at the but
then if you watch a predatormovie, you see the whole spine
and the tailbone standing outthere.
So in reality they should takethe whole spine and take it off
at the hip, or take the hip outtoo, like that way we have a
better idea of what the hip boneis.
But yeah.
I found out the hard way thatit's kind of fused all together
with some cartilage.
Yeah, not fun Find out.
Speaker 3 (17:42):
Do you know what they did in the surgery?
Speaker 1 (17:45):
Oh yes, so they um had to readjust and put
everything back near its place.
I have two bolts going throughmy ilium into my sacrum, and
then I have a a small plateright over my pelvic or pubic
bone, and so I have I had alittle C-section scar.
So what I would do is purposely,uh, trim down there and then
(18:06):
wear my bathing suits a littlelower.
So you see it that I mess withpeople.
Yeah, I'm trans.
They do like no, no, no, so orI had a kid.
Yeah, my kid, he's 22.
Well, people know I have a kid.
So he's 20, 25, 26, somewherethere.
He's old, he's out of the house.
(18:28):
I don't care um, but yeah, sohe's an adult.
And yeah, I had a kid andthat's my c-section scarred.
People look at me like wait,what?
Speaker 2 (18:32):
no, no no you're not really oh, I can kind of see it
like shut up.
Speaker 1 (18:36):
So wow so, but you have gotten back onto a bike
since the oh yeah the surgeryyeah, oh yeah, oddly, every
motorcycle accident has kind ofincreased my um protection level
.
So my first motorcycle accidentwas kind of increased my
protection level.
So my first motorcycle accidentwas head on with an 18 wheeler
no helmet, no leathers, no,nothing.
I was in about 30 miles an hourand he cut in front of me doing
(18:58):
a left hand turn and all I hadfrom that was like a little scar
over my eye or, yeah, stillhave a scar over one of my eyes
and some road rash in my forearm.
So each accident I've had orcollision that I've had, I've
gone from no helmet to a noveltyhelmet, to a half helmet, three
quarters Modular, which is flipup full face and wearing
(19:22):
leathers.
And then also now I go to likethe Kevlar stuff because they
last longer, you can insulatethem, you can layer them better
Leather if it gets wet, you'reSOL.
Speaker 3 (19:34):
So after the surgery and you moved to rehab I think
you said you were only in therefor a couple of weeks in the
rehab.
Speaker 1 (19:40):
No, I was there five days.
I got out the following Friday,so my accident was one Friday.
By the following Friday I wasout on a wheelchair and moving
myself around.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Okay, and how much time did you spend in the
wheelchair?
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Ooh, I want to say maybe two months, and I was
pushing it early with crutches.
Speaker 3 (19:58):
Okay.
Speaker 1 (19:59):
Because we live near kind of the bar district area in
San Antonio or the St Mary'sStrip and so I could crutch my
way there, but then I would wearmyself out and then I have to
like take a break for about anhour before I started dancing
with my crutches.
I'd have one crutch and kind oflean on it and dance with my
wife, and I kind of made afriend with one of the DJs that
we still communicate with nowfrom time to time.
(20:22):
So anytime I go into town Ialways go find out when one of
his sets are at and I go dancewith him and, um, but yeah, it's
uh, about three months I thinkI was back crutches and then, by
four months, I was walking.
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Wow, and are you to this day, still doing specific
exercises for your uh hip?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
Uh no, I just kind of do Pilates just in general, to
more for flexibility and beingable to move.
Speaker 3 (20:46):
now that I'm old, I'm Gen X, so everything is I can
tell by the movie referencesthat you've-.
Speaker 1 (20:53):
Yeah, it's not as easy to move around as much as
I'd like.
Speaker 3 (20:57):
Okay, how on earth did you think of finding a
hypnotist to help you with thepain?
Speaker 1 (21:04):
Well, actually I didn't.
So my podcast was a little bitof everything.
Uh, it was specifically becauseI am a former recovering
intercourse addict and so havingpeople in that kind of realm,
um, you know, sex counselors,licensed family therapists, porn
stars, uh, other addictions andthen just random people that we
(21:25):
just wanted to know anythingabout life, a little bit of life
advice, but also dating,coaching and kind of all in that
realm.
And in that I just have randompeople on from time to time
because I go to podcast guestexchange.
I'm like I don't want to do asolo episode today.
I need to find someone.
And there's a hypnotherapist onthere.
They're like, hey, you know, ifanybody wants to, you know I'm
(21:47):
this, this is my certifications,this is my background.
I'm like, oh yeah, sure, whynot Give it a shot?
Let's go.
And I had him on a couple oftimes.
There was a movie shortly afterI had him on on Netflix about a
hypnotherapist.
He kind of came on to try todebunk that like, hey, you
(22:09):
cannot do that.
You have to have a level oftrust with a therapist.
You're not.
Their therapist can't make youdo something that you're not
already willing to do or willingto try, so they can't tell you,
okay, you're going to killsomeone.
If you hear red rum, 77 orwhatever, like, you have to want
to do that and you, you knowthat would be um, it has to be
something that you would dowhile you're drunk, like, if you
(22:31):
would do it while you're drunkor inebriated, then it's
possible that hypnotherapistscould get you to do it.
But, uh, if you're drunk,you're not going to go out and
kill someone, either.
You're going to grope someone,be get into a fight.
You know the, the happy, sad,angry, drunk.
You know one of those three,whatever is in your in your
nature, whatever your ego, oneof those subconscious, whatever
(22:52):
is your most inclined to do.
It's possible, but still youhave to have that level of trust
in the therapist.
Speaker 3 (22:58):
And it was just one session and it worked, or did
you have to.
Speaker 1 (23:02):
We had two other sessions.
I forgot what the sessions were.
I have to look at the notes,but it was.
The third session was when wedid the pain.
I forgot what the other one twowere.
Ooh, and my memory is badbecause of all the collisions.
So really, anything prior to2016 is really fuzzy and unless
I journaled about it or have apost about it, I'm like I didn't
(23:23):
do that.
That doesn't sound like me.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
Wow.
So one of the things doctorstalk about is the brain pain
connection and how our brainswill still think our body's in
pain when technically it's not,and that's something a lot of
herniated disc and surgerypatients deal with is thinking
that they're still in pain whenthey're really not, and so it
(23:47):
just affects quality of life.
Speaker 1 (23:49):
Oh, yeah, yeah, I, I, I can totally attest to that,
especially with the hypnotherapy.
You tell me hey, just turn itdown.
You know kind of calm, relaxing.
This is where we are.
We're in a for me specificallykind of designed, that I'm in a
control room.
We're going to turn down theknob, we're going to turn that
pain down from nine to one andby the time we were done like it
was just oh, my God, it wasamazing.
I said I should have found thissooner.
(24:11):
Um, because a lot ofhypnotherapists you kind of have
a bad rap or they either do ashtick for like a show to get
people to act silly on stage, ormost of the service they do is
either like smoking cessation orkind of working out or a body
image.
But this guy he actually workswith, um, uh, body dysmorphia
stuff, especially for peoplethat are trans or can't afford
to do the conversion therapy.
(24:32):
This tells them, hey, you'reokay with your body, your body
doesn't represent who you are,but you are still you, you are
still a valid person and I don'tknow everything he shares or
does specifically with hispatients, but he does work with
you know variety of things tohelp people have that connection
between, like you say, with thepain, body connection you know,
with your mind and your body.
(24:53):
Because we assume, generallyspeaking, or at least for myself
, I assume I am me, this, likewhat you see, that's who I am,
when in reality I am my brain,the way I say it, or I've seen
it somewhere else is like I'm abrain controlling a skeleton
mech body with meat armor, andthat is more accurate of a
(25:14):
representation of who we are asfar as our mind and our ideas of
ourself.
But a lot of times we associateourself, our identity, as who
we appear outside and we have adisconnect and especially like
with trans, they have adisconnect with who they are on
the inside versus how they showon the outside.
Speaker 3 (25:31):
Yeah, Did going through this accident and the
hospital stay make you falterwith your addiction at all?
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Oh no, no, no, so that my intercourse addiction
I'd already recovered through itby 2012.
So I realized I was one in 2011and kind of fought, like I mean
, it's not a bad thing, I mean,it's just sex, it's not a big
deal, but it ruined a lot ofrelationships.
I didn't treat women well.
I objectified them, subjectedthem constantly and to me women
(26:03):
were disposable.
Um, if you're listening to this,watch the video and you can see
that I kind of present as likea typical bad boy and a lot of
women roughly four out of fiveI'm that preference.
Um, you know, some women willadmit to it, most women will not
, and a few, yes, they have noproblem admitting.
Yeah, that's what they like.
But then again there's otherwomen that like clean cut.
(26:27):
They have a preference forblack or white or whatever
ethnicity, whatever theirpreference is.
So that's where it's um would beharder for me to move in that
area.
And so for me, because so manywomen have that preference or
type or fetish, whatever youwant to call it, it was easy for
me to just pick up women and ofcourse I'm not sleeping with
great looking women all the time.
Back then it was just whateverI could get, I didn't care, as
long as it wasn't more than 24hours.
(26:49):
You know I'll go with anybody.
And so then I really learned tokind of value myself, not use
sex as a coping mechanism to getrid of or deal with whatever I
didn't want to face, because asguys we're not taught to deal
with emotions Like other thanhappy, angry or sad.
We don't know what we're feeling, we don't know how to express
(27:10):
it, and if we do, we get introuble because, you know, it's
usually some type of fight orconfrontation, and so that
helped me be better with who Iam as a person.
When my wife passed away, Ikind of did slip and falter for
a few weeks, but the accidentitself, no, it wasn't an issue.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Okay, and did you learn anything about yourself
because of the accident?
Speaker 1 (27:32):
Oh no, I didn't have.
I didn't have any epiphanies orany learning moments other than
other than the hip, likelearning how the anatomy of the
hip the hard way.
Yeah, other than that, no, Ithink it was just kind of a
realization to take better careof my bike too, Like pay
attention, not just the oilchange.
You got to check the otherthings too.
Speaker 3 (27:52):
Yeah and no like PTSD getting back on the bike, no.
Speaker 1 (27:58):
I'm like the really prototypical Gen X, like you
know.
Just rub some dirt on it andkeep going Like that's it.
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:05):
I'm afraid I did not act too.
Gen X-y, when I herniated mydisc I lived in like it really
caused some PTSD after surgery,like cause every little sharp
pain that you feel when you'rerecovering.
You think did I justre-herniate?
So I was a blubbering mess.
Speaker 1 (28:26):
Well, give.
I mean mean, if you're stilldealing with pain, give
hypnotherapy a try.
Um, oh crap, I forgot his name,but it's twin ravens something
and he's out of la now.
He was in alabama or arkansassomewhere, but uh, twin ravens
therapy, he's based out of la.
He does zoom calls.
It works over zoom, it worksfine.
And yeah, like he's, he'shelping with a lot of things.
Well, three things the.
(28:46):
I forgot the other two.
Maybe he told me not toremember it, I don't know.
That's possible I think it waslike working out and then like
goals and then the pain.
Yeah, that's great.
Speaker 3 (28:56):
I had a question and went right out of my brain.
Great, I had a question and itwent right out of my brain.
That's okay.
What was I going to ask you,holy cow?
Oh, I know what's your bikepreference.
Do you have a particular style,or?
Speaker 1 (29:11):
brand Cruiser, it was Victory.
But then they kind of wentdefunct and eventually became
Indian.
So if I get another bike itmight be an Indian next.
Speaker 3 (29:20):
Okay, great.
Well, do you have anything elseyou'd like to share with the
listeners before we wrap up?
Speaker 1 (29:26):
Yeah, if you're suffering through any type of
pain, whatever PTSD you've gotin the past, give him anotherapy
a try.
I can't vouch for anybody else,but I do know this Twin Ravens
guy.
He helped me out.
He's been on several podcasts.
He's on podcast guest exchangeevery now and again Not so much
now that he's a little more busybut tell him, gaius sent you
(29:47):
and maybe you'll get a discount.
I don't know, I haven't usedhim in a while, but yeah, he's a
great guy.
He used to be a tattoo artist.
And don't be afraid to liveyour life, because living in
fear is not living.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Yeah, absolutely Gaius.
Thank you so much for agreeingto just do this podcast and
share your injury story with us.
If you are a listener and youhave a positive story of
recovery, head over toBedBackBeyondcom and click share
your story.
I would love to include yourvoice on the show.
Once again, thank you so muchyou.
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