Addiction and the Search for Safety | Judd Shaw

Judd Shaw opens Season 2 of Behind the Armor by confronting the foundation of his personal healing: addiction. Through raw storytelling, Judd shares his descent into substance abuse, validation seeking, and materialism, all rooted in his unmet need for safety and connection. His journey spans from drug trafficking with biker gangs to success-driven burnout as a lawyer. The common thread: unresolved pain. This episode invites listeners to recognize that beneath every addiction—whether substances, success, or validation—is often unhealed trauma, shame, and loneliness waiting to be acknowledged and healed.

Lessons from the Episode:

Pain drives addiction: Healing begins when we address the root wounds, not just the surface behavior.

Success isn't safety: Achievements and wealth cannot substitute for inner peace and genuine security.

Belonging can be dangerous: Seeking connection without discernment can lead to destructive environments.

Vulnerability is strength: Owning personal stories is the first step to true healing and connection.

Healing is a journey: There is another side to pain; perseverance and connection lead the way forward.

CHAPTERS:
00:00 Introduction to Season 2 and addiction theme
02:45 Addiction begins with the search for safety
07:30 Early exposure to drugs and college descent
12:50 Deeper involvement with biker gangs and meth trafficking
18:20 Meth labs in Mexico and encounters with danger
23:10 Arrest fears and escape plan
27:35 Rehab, mental institution, and solitary confinement
33:40 Recovery attempts through validation and success
39:15 Marriage, wealth, and return to substance abuse
43:00 Hitting rock bottom and starting true healing

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