February 8, 2024 • 25 mins
When the echoes of a family's past shape the present, the tapestry of life becomes rich with stories of resilience and belonging. Dr. Walter Weiss, lovingly known as Wally, joins us to unravel his parents' gripping escape from Europe during the Holocaust, weaving a narrative that has profoundly influenced his own life journey—from the sacredness of his synagogue to his esteemed career in medicine. His reflections are a poignant reminder of how the struggles and triumphs of our forebears can deeply affect our own sense of identity and community.
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Episode Transcript
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Rabbi Ben Spratt (00:04):
The human story is the search for
belonging.
From childhood to adulthood, injoy and in struggle, we all sit
in questions of how to makesense of it all.
What is our place?
Why are we here?
What is our story of searching?
Join us in conversation withcommunity members each sharing
some of their own story.
(00:26):
I am Ben Spratt and this isbelonging.
It is truly a joy to be inconversation with fellow
carragant beloved friend, DrWalter Weiss, known around here
lovingly as Wally, and there aremany, many ways and
(00:47):
superlatives that we could heapupon you, Wally, certainly to
elevate the legacy of yourmulti-generational family and
the long history that you havein this congregation.
We certainly could point to youprofessionally and what it is
to be spending 30 plus years nowas the director of child
anesthesiology at NYU in LongIsland.
(01:09):
Or perhaps to be able to lookat the many ways that we get to
see you growing up in thiscommunity and continuing to
bring your presence into thiscommunity alongside Helen and, I
would say, in the journey of arabbi, getting to think of those
who are willing to lovinglycare, embrace, support and
(01:29):
nurture fellow journeyers inthis path.
And it is a true joy to be inconversation with you today,
Wally.
Well, thank you very much forhaving me here.
So we want to begin, as wealways do, with this question
what is your search forbelonging, Wally?
Dr. Wally Weiss (01:46):
I think that the way I would approach it is
historically.
For me, though my parents neverwould refer to themselves as
Holocaust survivors, theycertainly both fled Europe
during the Holocaust.
My father at 14 was on theKindertransport and sent to
England, never knowing if hewould see his parents again.
He ended up seeing them eightyears later in New York and my
(02:11):
mother fled Poland with hermother at the age of 14 almost
and never did see her fatheragain.
So I grew up on the Upper WestSide with parents who were not
necessarily totally comfortablein the United States.
So my father did fight in theSecond World War for the 10th
(02:34):
Mountain Division theillustrious 10th Mountain
Division, but late 50s, early60s on the Upper West Side.
I remember my parents' synagoguehunting when I was little.
I clearly remember visits toyoung Israel on 91st Street and
then I remember coming here withmy parents and seeing Rabbi
(02:58):
Newman standing on the Bima who,after having been in a bunch of
other synagogues, was.
This was the most un-Jewishplace I'd ever been.
There was on the high holidays.
There wasn't a Kippah or aTalus to be seen in the
sanctuary.
Rabbi Newman spoke almostexclusively throughout the
service in English and I'm notsure, that's what my father had
(03:23):
in mind.
But he said I want my childrento understand where they're from
, where they're going and towhom they belong.
And he signed on the dottedline.
And we've been here since I wasabout nine or ten.
I love this place.
I love this place.
It's just very, verycomfortable here.
My kids like this place too,which is wonderful.
(03:44):
So, yeah, we're very happy here.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (03:47):
So for your parents sharing a journey where
they got to see their world comeapart and coming to a place
where they hoped to build, Iimagine more of a feeling of
security for you.
Growing up, how did yourparents talk about Europe and
their own childhoods?
Dr. Wally Weiss (04:05):
My mother's father was the chief medical
officer, owner, proprietor of aJewish hospital in what.
When he was born, the city wasLemberg.
When my mother was born, thecity was Lviv and today we know
it as Ukrainian Lviv.
So at the time the bombingstarted in September of 39, my
(04:29):
grandfather was taking my uncleto start medical school in
London.
My grandfather had trained inVienna, hoping that the two of
them would somehow have apractice together someday.
As the Germans approached thatpart of Poland, my mother and
grandmother put everything theycould into the family major car,
which was the ambulance.
(04:49):
It served as the ambulance forthe hospital and took one of the
ambulance drivers who theydidn't even realize at the time
they were fleeing until sixmonths later was in fact Jewish
and they went to Romania wheremy grandmother had a cousin.
After that I guess families geta little grating on each other's
nerves or whatever they leftRomania and drove and drove and
(05:14):
ended up in Marseille where theyspent about a year.
My mother went to school at anAmerican school in Marseille and
then they managed to getpermission to enter Portugal and
they left the car, left thedriver and much of their
belongings in Marseille, tookabout to Lisbon before they got
(05:37):
visas to Cuba and they took theboat to Havana where my mother
again went to school in anAmerican school for a year and a
half or so and developed greatfriends with other European
Jewish exiles in Cuba, some ofthem until they've recently
(05:57):
passed.
They were all her best friendsfrom her time in Cuba.
She was in Havana for about ayear and a half before they got
visas to New York where mygrandmother knew people.
My mother was able to finishhigh school, go to college she
was cutting diamonds actually tohelp support them and that's my
mother's voyage.
She and my father wereintroduced by mutual friends of.
(06:23):
My grandmother's closest friendand my father's mother were
actually both anesthesiologistsat Beekman Downtown Hospital,
two of the first womenanesthesiologists in this
country.
My father, as I said at 14, wasput on the Kindertransport, also
left London because London wasbecoming ugly with the bombings,
moved to the coast, to southernEngland, to Bournemouth, where
(06:47):
he got a job as a shipping clerkin a trucking company.
In 1942, his parents managed toget out of Munich but his
mother took a train to Lisbonwith the family story as 52
shipping crates with the China,the silver rugs, paintings,
(07:12):
sculptures, art and a week latermy grandfather flew
commercially in 1942.
He was a blonde-haired,blue-eyed Jew and was abducted
by the Gestapo in Lisbon and washeld for about 10 days, which
(07:32):
was not his first time.
He was also arrestedKristallnacht in Munich and was
kept for a few days.
Then my grandmother managed toget him out Nevertheless.
He got out and they made it ona steamer to New York a few
months later.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (07:52):
So for you growing up, your father, your
parents had made their way,certainly found this to be a
home for them the synagogue, thecity.
For you growing up, did youfeel like the Upper West Side
was your backyard, Did you feelthat this was home and haven
100%.
Dr. Wally Weiss (08:09):
So what was it like?
It was very different then.
I grew up on West End in 91stand when I was 11, my parents
moved to Central Park West in88th, where my mother still
lives.
The distance between CentralPark West and Broadway was a
no-man's land and the only waywe were allowed to go to
(08:30):
Broadway was to go to 86thStreet.
You could go East and West on86th, but not on any of the side
streets because they were quotetoo dangerous.
I've never been on them.
We weren't allowed to.
I remember in high school wehad to do a museum trip, a field
trip to the Brooklyn Museum,and I'd certainly been in the
(08:50):
subway many, many times before,but I'd never been to Brooklyn.
And I remember going with oneof my classmates by subway to
the Brooklyn Museum and it was amassive adventure.
I discovered that there wereother parts of the city.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (09:06):
I think many of us would say what's the point
of ever leaving Upper West Side?
I mean, you've got everythingyou need right here, Exactly.
Dr. Wally Weiss (09:11):
This is a major part of me, I think.
When I graduated high school Isaid I'm getting out of the city
, I'm never coming back to thecity.
You'd have to be out of yourmind to ever want to live here.
And I went to collegeundergraduate in Vermont, I went
to graduate school inConnecticut and then I went to
medical school in Ireland andmost of that time I still was
(09:38):
convinced I would never comeback to the city.
And then I remember, as I wasfinishing medical school, when I
was interviewing forresidencies actually my first
choice was to the University ofVermont and I had a great
interview there and I had alovely time there and a great
day and I remember it wassnowing brutally the day of my
(10:01):
interview.
And at the end of my day thereand all the interviews, the
chairman of the chief of theresidency said are you staying
in Vermont for a few days?
I said no, I actually have aflight back to New York.
And he said I'll take you in mytruck and he put me in his
pickup truck and on the way tothe airport he said we love to
(10:23):
have you, you're a greatcandidate, but we have to tell
you if your goal is to come tothe University of Vermont and
stay here.
There's a list of people whohave graduated out of this
program who are waiting forsomeone to die to get back here.
So my advice is find a big cityprogram and you'll probably
open your choices better thanjust being in Vermont.
(10:46):
So I trained in back in thecity.
I came back to the city and Idon't know if it was magnetism
or what, but I've been here eversince.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (10:54):
So tell us a little bit about the journey
into medical school and the callof the doctor.
I think many people would seethis as the eternal hope that
many Jewish parents would haveof their children.
Obviously, I broke from thatand disappointed, I'm sure, my
parents immensely Somehow,obviously, you were able to feel
that calling and would love tohear more about what took you
(11:16):
into this path.
Dr. Wally Weiss (11:17):
My parents, and my grandmother, probably
especially my grandmother saidessentially you can be a doctor,
you can be a lawyer or, ifnecessary, an accountant, but
the sum of it all is you neverknow when the Cossacks are
coming over the hill.
And that was my grandmother'sphilosophy you never know when
(11:39):
the Cossacks are coming and youhave to be able to pick up with
what's between your ears andstart life afresh somewhere else
.
So my mother's father again,was an obstetrician gynecologist
and my father's mother was ananesthesiologist who went to
medical school in Munich andactually did her PhD
dissertation on an anesthesiatopic.
(12:00):
I actually have her thesis athome in German.
The quest for science, thelearning I guess I was born with
that.
I had that at the University ofConnecticut Health Science
Center doing research after mymaster's degree, and I shared my
lab with an Italian pathologistthat I became very, very good
(12:22):
friends with and he basicallytook me by the collar one day,
smacked me on the head and hesaid you're, essentially, you're
European.
He said why are you not lookingat European medical schools?
Because you can get into them.
And I said never thought of it.
And we pulled out the WHOdirectory of international
medical schools, where they alsolisted those approved by the
(12:46):
United States government andthose who took some Americans,
and I picked four of them thethree French programs in Belgium
, which were very, very goodschools, and the Royal College
of Surgeons and Dublin Packed mysuitcase, took my dad and off
we went to Brussels and I lookedaround the University of
Brussels, the University ofLevant and the University of
(13:07):
Liège and they all basicallysaid you know you want to spot,
you're in.
And they also said you know youreally don't have to do the
first year.
You can just place out of theexams, go home, have your summer
, take the exams in September,you can place out and start the
second year of school.
And we came back to the Statesand I called my boss in
(13:30):
Connecticut and I got my jobback and about 10 days later I
got it, my father, I was inConnecticut.
My dad said you just got atelegram from this place called
the Royal College of Surgeons inIreland asking if you're still
interested.
So apparently there was a malestrike in Ireland, which is not
an unheard of thing, so therewas no transatlantic male at all
(13:51):
coming to or from Ireland.
And I said yeah.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (13:56):
I'm interested .
Dr. Wally Weiss (13:57):
So we called him and I went and I was there
for the next seven years.
I stayed through my internship.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (14:04):
And I imagine that there were some gifts that
bloomed in Ireland.
Dr. Wally Weiss (14:08):
Yes, as my wife likes to say, I came home with
more than my luggage.
Yeah, actually January of myfirst year, there is an annual
conference of the Irish MedicalStudent Association, and the
second night there, the Saturdaynight, there was a formal
(14:28):
dinner for all the Irish medicalstudents One sober time of the
weekend, briefly, and after thedinner there was a dance Again,
things I will never forget Aguitarist, an accordion player
and someone on the drums.
They were quite appalling.
But I was sitting downlistening to the awful music and
(14:49):
I heard at the table rightbehind me a young woman's voice,
clearly Irish, intelligentlydiscussing with someone else
Woody Allen films.
So I turned around and joinedin the conversation and that,
shall we say.
The rest is history.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (15:08):
So obviously, then, the beginning of you and
Helen yeah, and as you moveforward and think about the
journey that then brought youboth back here to New York and
the beginning of a new chapterof belonging here, did it feel
like just a continuation ofchildhood or did this feel like
this was a new New York that youwere having to re acquaint
(15:30):
yourself with, to fall in lovewith again?
Dr. Wally Weiss (15:36):
You know, I've never actually thought of it
that way, but you're entirelyright, this was a continuation
of my childhood.
This was me back on the UpperWest Side, back in this
community, back in thiscongregation.
Coming back to New York wassort of like, okay, you had your
(15:57):
nasty teenage years and thenyou realize that, yeah, this is
where I belong.
This is where I belong.
And I've always said to myfriends and colleagues on my
colleagues on Long Island I canlive in the city perfectly well
and I can live in the woods.
We have a house in Vermont.
I live in the woods, butsuburbia makes no sense to me.
(16:20):
I can't live in suburbia andthey're feeling so exactly the
opposite.
But that's okay, that's who Iam.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (16:28):
And there's a reason why we get to see a world
where we have people whoinhabit almost every corner of
it, and everyone, hopefully,eventually finds their place of
belonging.
For those of us who feel calledinto the beat of the concrete
jungle doesn't mean that thereisn't the appreciation of
wanting to also leave it fromtime to time.
I'm curious for you, though, asyou think back over your
(16:52):
grandmother's philosophy thatrippled a little bit into your
parents Do you think theCossacks are coming?
Do you feel like the shadowthat is crept into prior
generations is still there,lingering, maybe even at the
periphery of your own visiontoday?
Dr. Wally Weiss (17:11):
I don't think it's a very dark or deep shadow,
but it's not gone.
It is disconcerting to see thearmed policemen and the holidays
in front of the building and toknow that it's good to have
them there.
It's very sad to know that wehave to have them there, but I'm
(17:33):
glad they're there.
I'm I'm very happy we have ourhouse in Vermont.
There's actually a lovelylittle Jewish community growing
in the state of Vermont andwe're 80 80 miles from the
Canadian border got forbid.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (17:49):
So, if we can pivot for a second, wally, I'm
really curious if we could divea little bit more into the
Scientist and the doctor in youfor a second.
What have you today, when youthink of the way you look at the
world, is still shaped by thatScientific method, by that lens
(18:10):
of curiosity, by that sense of auniverse of mystery and wonder.
How does that come forward inyour day-to-day life?
Dr. Wally Weiss (18:20):
I hate to say it, but it almost doesn't.
Without ranting too much aboutMedicine in the United States
today.
The system is broken.
The desire for scientificinquest and inquiry and pursuit
of excellence is, I guess Iwould say, not all that
(18:41):
encouraged.
We are being driven byprotocols and metrics and
evidence-based medicine.
So evidence-based medicinebasically means how do you
successfully treat the mostpeople in the same way to get
(19:06):
Two standard deviations from themean successfully treated?
None of my friends went tomedical school for that.
If, if People were Chevroletscoming off the assembly line and
everyone was the same, whenthat part breaks, you know how
to fix that part and it's thesame for absolutely all the
Chevrolets that came off theassembly line.
(19:26):
Even though you know the oldsaying in medicine, when you
hear hoof beats You're supposedto think horses, because most of
the time it's horses, but it'snot always horses and every once
in a while there will be azebra in front of you or
something else galloping by.
I have the luxury at this pointin my career to be able to tell
(19:48):
them to go to hell.
I treat my patients the way Ithink they need to be treated.
I give the medications that Ithink they need and I don't give
the ones that I think areunnecessary, though they are
given standardly to the vastmajority of people for the vast
majority of reasons.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (20:07):
You know, I feel like for so many of us who
embark on careers, there's aspark, a spirit that moves us,
that motivates us, and along theway, invariably, we have
organizations, institutions,protocols, procedures that strip
away, in many ways, the veryelements that sparked that
(20:28):
journey.
And I think it's reallywonderful actually to have the
example of how do we hold on toit, how do we reclaim that?
How do we continue to feel likewe ourselves are anchored in
the things that we're devotingour life and time to?
So how do you keep yourselfcentered on humanity?
I mean, does it come easily?
Do you have to pause for amoment and say I can't just put
(20:49):
this person into a diagnosticmold, I need to look at who they
are as an individual?
I mean, how do you do that?
Dr. Wally Weiss (20:55):
You know when I have residents and students and
when I'm trying to teach.
The science is all in the books, the graphs and the charts and
the protocols.
It's all in the books.
What I can teach them is thehumanity part of it.
They don't teach doctors andresidents and medical students
(21:20):
to touch people with their hands.
Everyone puts gloves on.
The chances of you picking upan infection from someone who
isn't in fulmin' and sepsis bynot wearing a glove is
negligible.
It's like shake hands withpeople with my hands.
I don't put gloves on.
The human connection is one ofthe highest imperatives in
(21:44):
medicine and I'm not sure it'staught well.
So I spend about 70 odd percentof my time at work taking care
of kids and I love taking careof kids.
They never lie to you.
They tell you the truth.
If something hurts, it hurts.
If it doesn't hurt, it doesn'thurt.
(22:05):
When kids get sick, they getsick very fast and when they get
better, they get better very,very fast.
I tell young residents andmedical students when you take a
small child through a majorsurgery a six, eight, 12 hour
surgery wake up at the end of itand, without a parent anywhere
(22:25):
near them, they look at you andsay thank you for taking care of
me.
I just melt into a puddle and Idon't need a paycheck for that
year.
There's nothing better on theplanet than that for me.
And the day after surgery thekids are saying can I go to the
playroom and play with the otherkids?
Rabbi Ben Spratt (22:45):
And I think to imagine that there is a truth
and honesty and authenticitythat we are naturally tapped
into as we enter this world isactually a beautiful lens on
humanity.
I think many of us have beenincubated in an environment
where we've come to see thathumanity is perhaps naturally
negative or naturally selfish,and that that is what we try to
(23:06):
change or evolve over time.
I think it's in many ways, evenmore powerful to imagine that
maybe as adults, we need toreconnect with the inner child,
the honest being, who's able toimmediately tap into the
gratitude, the appreciation andalso the annoyance.
But from the moments thatmatter, and perhaps not just
what the people around us areassociating and I think that
(23:28):
that's something that I comeback to again and again because,
obviously in the context ofreligion, we get to see some of
the very same dynamics takeplace as organizations, as
religious figures like rabbisand priests and imams come to
the place where we create moreand more distance from the very
people that we mean to serve,not because we intend to, but
(23:50):
because, as we try to scale themeeting of needs, we try to find
the most efficient wayspossible in the most equitable
way possible, and what oftengets lost along the way is again
that direct contact, thatrecognition that all of these
industries, all of theseprofessions started because of a
human need.
What a gift for those who get tolearn under you to have that
(24:10):
lesson in their ears, because atsome point right now that's
through, I'm sure and at somepoint another, I think we all
lose our way a little bit, eventhose of us who may have a
ascending career path at somepoint.
How do we come back to the verything that started us on this
journey?
Well, I wanna offer gratitude,wally.
This is a gift to not only heara little bit of the story that
(24:34):
ripples behind you and beneathyou, but also some of the story
that you're a part of shapinghere, and I just feel grateful
to be one of the many whoappreciates going through these
pews and through these walls,feeling your love and your care,
your humanity, and thank youfor bringing a bit of your
journey and your search forbelonging here to Rhoda Shulam.
Dr. Wally Weiss (24:53):
Thank you very much for having me.
This has been cathartic in away.
Yeah, I've very much enjoyedtalking to you and I appreciate
it.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (25:05):
Thank you for joining us and listening to this
story of belonging.
Stay connected with us onFacebook and Instagram.
You can find me on Twitter atBenHSpratt.
For more information about CRS,visit us online at rodephsholom
.
org.
The human story is the search for
belonging.
From childhood to adulthood, injoy and in struggle, we all sit
in questions of how to makesense of it all.
What is our place?
Why are we here?
What is our story of searching?
Join us in conversation withcommunity members each sharing
some of their own story.
(00:26):
I am Ben Spratt and this isbelonging.
It is truly a joy to be inconversation with fellow
carragant beloved friend, DrWalter Weiss, known around here
lovingly as Wally, and there aremany, many ways and
(00:47):
superlatives that we could heapupon you, Wally, certainly to
elevate the legacy of yourmulti-generational family and
the long history that you havein this congregation.
We certainly could point to youprofessionally and what it is
to be spending 30 plus years nowas the director of child
anesthesiology at NYU in LongIsland.
(01:09):
Or perhaps to be able to lookat the many ways that we get to
see you growing up in thiscommunity and continuing to
bring your presence into thiscommunity alongside Helen and, I
would say, in the journey of arabbi, getting to think of those
who are willing to lovinglycare, embrace, support and
(01:29):
nurture fellow journeyers inthis path.
And it is a true joy to be inconversation with you today,
Wally.
Well, thank you very much forhaving me here.
So we want to begin, as wealways do, with this question
what is your search forbelonging, Wally?
Dr. Wally Weiss (01:46):
I think that the way I would approach it is
historically.
For me, though my parents neverwould refer to themselves as
Holocaust survivors, theycertainly both fled Europe
during the Holocaust.
My father at 14 was on theKindertransport and sent to
England, never knowing if hewould see his parents again.
He ended up seeing them eightyears later in New York and my
(02:11):
mother fled Poland with hermother at the age of 14 almost
and never did see her fatheragain.
So I grew up on the Upper WestSide with parents who were not
necessarily totally comfortablein the United States.
So my father did fight in theSecond World War for the 10th
(02:34):
Mountain Division theillustrious 10th Mountain
Division, but late 50s, early60s on the Upper West Side.
I remember my parents' synagoguehunting when I was little.
I clearly remember visits toyoung Israel on 91st Street and
then I remember coming here withmy parents and seeing Rabbi
(02:58):
Newman standing on the Bima who,after having been in a bunch of
other synagogues, was.
This was the most un-Jewishplace I'd ever been.
There was on the high holidays.
There wasn't a Kippah or aTalus to be seen in the
sanctuary.
Rabbi Newman spoke almostexclusively throughout the
service in English and I'm notsure, that's what my father had
(03:23):
in mind.
But he said I want my childrento understand where they're from
, where they're going and towhom they belong.
And he signed on the dottedline.
And we've been here since I wasabout nine or ten.
I love this place.
I love this place.
It's just very, verycomfortable here.
My kids like this place too,which is wonderful.
(03:44):
So, yeah, we're very happy here.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (03:47):
So for your parents sharing a journey where
they got to see their world comeapart and coming to a place
where they hoped to build, Iimagine more of a feeling of
security for you.
Growing up, how did yourparents talk about Europe and
their own childhoods?
Dr. Wally Weiss (04:05):
My mother's father was the chief medical
officer, owner, proprietor of aJewish hospital in what.
When he was born, the city wasLemberg.
When my mother was born, thecity was Lviv and today we know
it as Ukrainian Lviv.
So at the time the bombingstarted in September of 39, my
(04:29):
grandfather was taking my uncleto start medical school in
London.
My grandfather had trained inVienna, hoping that the two of
them would somehow have apractice together someday.
As the Germans approached thatpart of Poland, my mother and
grandmother put everything theycould into the family major car,
which was the ambulance.
(04:49):
It served as the ambulance forthe hospital and took one of the
ambulance drivers who theydidn't even realize at the time
they were fleeing until sixmonths later was in fact Jewish
and they went to Romania wheremy grandmother had a cousin.
After that I guess families geta little grating on each other's
nerves or whatever they leftRomania and drove and drove and
(05:14):
ended up in Marseille where theyspent about a year.
My mother went to school at anAmerican school in Marseille and
then they managed to getpermission to enter Portugal and
they left the car, left thedriver and much of their
belongings in Marseille, tookabout to Lisbon before they got
(05:37):
visas to Cuba and they took theboat to Havana where my mother
again went to school in anAmerican school for a year and a
half or so and developed greatfriends with other European
Jewish exiles in Cuba, some ofthem until they've recently
(05:57):
passed.
They were all her best friendsfrom her time in Cuba.
She was in Havana for about ayear and a half before they got
visas to New York where mygrandmother knew people.
My mother was able to finishhigh school, go to college she
was cutting diamonds actually tohelp support them and that's my
mother's voyage.
She and my father wereintroduced by mutual friends of.
(06:23):
My grandmother's closest friendand my father's mother were
actually both anesthesiologistsat Beekman Downtown Hospital,
two of the first womenanesthesiologists in this
country.
My father, as I said at 14, wasput on the Kindertransport, also
left London because London wasbecoming ugly with the bombings,
moved to the coast, to southernEngland, to Bournemouth, where
(06:47):
he got a job as a shipping clerkin a trucking company.
In 1942, his parents managed toget out of Munich but his
mother took a train to Lisbonwith the family story as 52
shipping crates with the China,the silver rugs, paintings,
(07:12):
sculptures, art and a week latermy grandfather flew
commercially in 1942.
He was a blonde-haired,blue-eyed Jew and was abducted
by the Gestapo in Lisbon and washeld for about 10 days, which
(07:32):
was not his first time.
He was also arrestedKristallnacht in Munich and was
kept for a few days.
Then my grandmother managed toget him out Nevertheless.
He got out and they made it ona steamer to New York a few
months later.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (07:52):
So for you growing up, your father, your
parents had made their way,certainly found this to be a
home for them the synagogue, thecity.
For you growing up, did youfeel like the Upper West Side
was your backyard, Did you feelthat this was home and haven
100%.
Dr. Wally Weiss (08:09):
So what was it like?
It was very different then.
I grew up on West End in 91stand when I was 11, my parents
moved to Central Park West in88th, where my mother still
lives.
The distance between CentralPark West and Broadway was a
no-man's land and the only waywe were allowed to go to
(08:30):
Broadway was to go to 86thStreet.
You could go East and West on86th, but not on any of the side
streets because they were quotetoo dangerous.
I've never been on them.
We weren't allowed to.
I remember in high school wehad to do a museum trip, a field
trip to the Brooklyn Museum,and I'd certainly been in the
(08:50):
subway many, many times before,but I'd never been to Brooklyn.
And I remember going with oneof my classmates by subway to
the Brooklyn Museum and it was amassive adventure.
I discovered that there wereother parts of the city.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (09:06):
I think many of us would say what's the point
of ever leaving Upper West Side?
I mean, you've got everythingyou need right here, Exactly.
Dr. Wally Weiss (09:11):
This is a major part of me, I think.
When I graduated high school Isaid I'm getting out of the city
, I'm never coming back to thecity.
You'd have to be out of yourmind to ever want to live here.
And I went to collegeundergraduate in Vermont, I went
to graduate school inConnecticut and then I went to
medical school in Ireland andmost of that time I still was
(09:38):
convinced I would never comeback to the city.
And then I remember, as I wasfinishing medical school, when I
was interviewing forresidencies actually my first
choice was to the University ofVermont and I had a great
interview there and I had alovely time there and a great
day and I remember it wassnowing brutally the day of my
(10:01):
interview.
And at the end of my day thereand all the interviews, the
chairman of the chief of theresidency said are you staying
in Vermont for a few days?
I said no, I actually have aflight back to New York.
And he said I'll take you in mytruck and he put me in his
pickup truck and on the way tothe airport he said we love to
(10:23):
have you, you're a greatcandidate, but we have to tell
you if your goal is to come tothe University of Vermont and
stay here.
There's a list of people whohave graduated out of this
program who are waiting forsomeone to die to get back here.
So my advice is find a big cityprogram and you'll probably
open your choices better thanjust being in Vermont.
(10:46):
So I trained in back in thecity.
I came back to the city and Idon't know if it was magnetism
or what, but I've been here eversince.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (10:54):
So tell us a little bit about the journey
into medical school and the callof the doctor.
I think many people would seethis as the eternal hope that
many Jewish parents would haveof their children.
Obviously, I broke from thatand disappointed, I'm sure, my
parents immensely Somehow,obviously, you were able to feel
that calling and would love tohear more about what took you
(11:16):
into this path.
Dr. Wally Weiss (11:17):
My parents, and my grandmother, probably
especially my grandmother saidessentially you can be a doctor,
you can be a lawyer or, ifnecessary, an accountant, but
the sum of it all is you neverknow when the Cossacks are
coming over the hill.
And that was my grandmother'sphilosophy you never know when
(11:39):
the Cossacks are coming and youhave to be able to pick up with
what's between your ears andstart life afresh somewhere else
.
So my mother's father again,was an obstetrician gynecologist
and my father's mother was ananesthesiologist who went to
medical school in Munich andactually did her PhD
dissertation on an anesthesiatopic.
(12:00):
I actually have her thesis athome in German.
The quest for science, thelearning I guess I was born with
that.
I had that at the University ofConnecticut Health Science
Center doing research after mymaster's degree, and I shared my
lab with an Italian pathologistthat I became very, very good
(12:22):
friends with and he basicallytook me by the collar one day,
smacked me on the head and hesaid you're, essentially, you're
European.
He said why are you not lookingat European medical schools?
Because you can get into them.
And I said never thought of it.
And we pulled out the WHOdirectory of international
medical schools, where they alsolisted those approved by the
(12:46):
United States government andthose who took some Americans,
and I picked four of them thethree French programs in Belgium
, which were very, very goodschools, and the Royal College
of Surgeons and Dublin Packed mysuitcase, took my dad and off
we went to Brussels and I lookedaround the University of
Brussels, the University ofLevant and the University of
(13:07):
Liège and they all basicallysaid you know you want to spot,
you're in.
And they also said you know youreally don't have to do the
first year.
You can just place out of theexams, go home, have your summer
, take the exams in September,you can place out and start the
second year of school.
And we came back to the Statesand I called my boss in
(13:30):
Connecticut and I got my jobback and about 10 days later I
got it, my father, I was inConnecticut.
My dad said you just got atelegram from this place called
the Royal College of Surgeons inIreland asking if you're still
interested.
So apparently there was a malestrike in Ireland, which is not
an unheard of thing, so therewas no transatlantic male at all
(13:51):
coming to or from Ireland.
And I said yeah.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (13:56):
I'm interested .
Dr. Wally Weiss (13:57):
So we called him and I went and I was there
for the next seven years.
I stayed through my internship.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (14:04):
And I imagine that there were some gifts that
bloomed in Ireland.
Dr. Wally Weiss (14:08):
Yes, as my wife likes to say, I came home with
more than my luggage.
Yeah, actually January of myfirst year, there is an annual
conference of the Irish MedicalStudent Association, and the
second night there, the Saturdaynight, there was a formal
(14:28):
dinner for all the Irish medicalstudents One sober time of the
weekend, briefly, and after thedinner there was a dance Again,
things I will never forget Aguitarist, an accordion player
and someone on the drums.
They were quite appalling.
But I was sitting downlistening to the awful music and
(14:49):
I heard at the table rightbehind me a young woman's voice,
clearly Irish, intelligentlydiscussing with someone else
Woody Allen films.
So I turned around and joinedin the conversation and that,
shall we say.
The rest is history.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (15:08):
So obviously, then, the beginning of you and
Helen yeah, and as you moveforward and think about the
journey that then brought youboth back here to New York and
the beginning of a new chapterof belonging here, did it feel
like just a continuation ofchildhood or did this feel like
this was a new New York that youwere having to re acquaint
(15:30):
yourself with, to fall in lovewith again?
Dr. Wally Weiss (15:36):
You know, I've never actually thought of it
that way, but you're entirelyright, this was a continuation
of my childhood.
This was me back on the UpperWest Side, back in this
community, back in thiscongregation.
Coming back to New York wassort of like, okay, you had your
(15:57):
nasty teenage years and thenyou realize that, yeah, this is
where I belong.
This is where I belong.
And I've always said to myfriends and colleagues on my
colleagues on Long Island I canlive in the city perfectly well
and I can live in the woods.
We have a house in Vermont.
I live in the woods, butsuburbia makes no sense to me.
(16:20):
I can't live in suburbia andthey're feeling so exactly the
opposite.
But that's okay, that's who Iam.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (16:28):
And there's a reason why we get to see a world
where we have people whoinhabit almost every corner of
it, and everyone, hopefully,eventually finds their place of
belonging.
For those of us who feel calledinto the beat of the concrete
jungle doesn't mean that thereisn't the appreciation of
wanting to also leave it fromtime to time.
I'm curious for you, though, asyou think back over your
(16:52):
grandmother's philosophy thatrippled a little bit into your
parents Do you think theCossacks are coming?
Do you feel like the shadowthat is crept into prior
generations is still there,lingering, maybe even at the
periphery of your own visiontoday?
Dr. Wally Weiss (17:11):
I don't think it's a very dark or deep shadow,
but it's not gone.
It is disconcerting to see thearmed policemen and the holidays
in front of the building and toknow that it's good to have
them there.
It's very sad to know that wehave to have them there, but I'm
(17:33):
glad they're there.
I'm I'm very happy we have ourhouse in Vermont.
There's actually a lovelylittle Jewish community growing
in the state of Vermont andwe're 80 80 miles from the
Canadian border got forbid.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (17:49):
So, if we can pivot for a second, wally, I'm
really curious if we could divea little bit more into the
Scientist and the doctor in youfor a second.
What have you today, when youthink of the way you look at the
world, is still shaped by thatScientific method, by that lens
(18:10):
of curiosity, by that sense of auniverse of mystery and wonder.
How does that come forward inyour day-to-day life?
Dr. Wally Weiss (18:20):
I hate to say it, but it almost doesn't.
Without ranting too much aboutMedicine in the United States
today.
The system is broken.
The desire for scientificinquest and inquiry and pursuit
of excellence is, I guess Iwould say, not all that
(18:41):
encouraged.
We are being driven byprotocols and metrics and
evidence-based medicine.
So evidence-based medicinebasically means how do you
successfully treat the mostpeople in the same way to get
(19:06):
Two standard deviations from themean successfully treated?
None of my friends went tomedical school for that.
If, if People were Chevroletscoming off the assembly line and
everyone was the same, whenthat part breaks, you know how
to fix that part and it's thesame for absolutely all the
Chevrolets that came off theassembly line.
(19:26):
Even though you know the oldsaying in medicine, when you
hear hoof beats You're supposedto think horses, because most of
the time it's horses, but it'snot always horses and every once
in a while there will be azebra in front of you or
something else galloping by.
I have the luxury at this pointin my career to be able to tell
(19:48):
them to go to hell.
I treat my patients the way Ithink they need to be treated.
I give the medications that Ithink they need and I don't give
the ones that I think areunnecessary, though they are
given standardly to the vastmajority of people for the vast
majority of reasons.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (20:07):
You know, I feel like for so many of us who
embark on careers, there's aspark, a spirit that moves us,
that motivates us, and along theway, invariably, we have
organizations, institutions,protocols, procedures that strip
away, in many ways, the veryelements that sparked that
(20:28):
journey.
And I think it's reallywonderful actually to have the
example of how do we hold on toit, how do we reclaim that?
How do we continue to feel likewe ourselves are anchored in
the things that we're devotingour life and time to?
So how do you keep yourselfcentered on humanity?
I mean, does it come easily?
Do you have to pause for amoment and say I can't just put
(20:49):
this person into a diagnosticmold, I need to look at who they
are as an individual?
I mean, how do you do that?
Dr. Wally Weiss (20:55):
You know when I have residents and students and
when I'm trying to teach.
The science is all in the books, the graphs and the charts and
the protocols.
It's all in the books.
What I can teach them is thehumanity part of it.
They don't teach doctors andresidents and medical students
(21:20):
to touch people with their hands.
Everyone puts gloves on.
The chances of you picking upan infection from someone who
isn't in fulmin' and sepsis bynot wearing a glove is
negligible.
It's like shake hands withpeople with my hands.
I don't put gloves on.
The human connection is one ofthe highest imperatives in
(21:44):
medicine and I'm not sure it'staught well.
So I spend about 70 odd percentof my time at work taking care
of kids and I love taking careof kids.
They never lie to you.
They tell you the truth.
If something hurts, it hurts.
If it doesn't hurt, it doesn'thurt.
(22:05):
When kids get sick, they getsick very fast and when they get
better, they get better very,very fast.
I tell young residents andmedical students when you take a
small child through a majorsurgery a six, eight, 12 hour
surgery wake up at the end of itand, without a parent anywhere
(22:25):
near them, they look at you andsay thank you for taking care of
me.
I just melt into a puddle and Idon't need a paycheck for that
year.
There's nothing better on theplanet than that for me.
And the day after surgery thekids are saying can I go to the
playroom and play with the otherkids?
Rabbi Ben Spratt (22:45):
And I think to imagine that there is a truth
and honesty and authenticitythat we are naturally tapped
into as we enter this world isactually a beautiful lens on
humanity.
I think many of us have beenincubated in an environment
where we've come to see thathumanity is perhaps naturally
negative or naturally selfish,and that that is what we try to
(23:06):
change or evolve over time.
I think it's in many ways, evenmore powerful to imagine that
maybe as adults, we need toreconnect with the inner child,
the honest being, who's able toimmediately tap into the
gratitude, the appreciation andalso the annoyance.
But from the moments thatmatter, and perhaps not just
what the people around us areassociating and I think that
(23:28):
that's something that I comeback to again and again because,
obviously in the context ofreligion, we get to see some of
the very same dynamics takeplace as organizations, as
religious figures like rabbisand priests and imams come to
the place where we create moreand more distance from the very
people that we mean to serve,not because we intend to, but
(23:50):
because, as we try to scale themeeting of needs, we try to find
the most efficient wayspossible in the most equitable
way possible, and what oftengets lost along the way is again
that direct contact, thatrecognition that all of these
industries, all of theseprofessions started because of a
human need.
What a gift for those who get tolearn under you to have that
(24:10):
lesson in their ears, because atsome point right now that's
through, I'm sure and at somepoint another, I think we all
lose our way a little bit, eventhose of us who may have a
ascending career path at somepoint.
How do we come back to the verything that started us on this
journey?
Well, I wanna offer gratitude,wally.
This is a gift to not only heara little bit of the story that
(24:34):
ripples behind you and beneathyou, but also some of the story
that you're a part of shapinghere, and I just feel grateful
to be one of the many whoappreciates going through these
pews and through these walls,feeling your love and your care,
your humanity, and thank youfor bringing a bit of your
journey and your search forbelonging here to Rhoda Shulam.
Dr. Wally Weiss (24:53):
Thank you very much for having me.
This has been cathartic in away.
Yeah, I've very much enjoyedtalking to you and I appreciate
it.
Rabbi Ben Spratt (25:05):
Thank you for joining us and listening to this
story of belonging.
Stay connected with us onFacebook and Instagram.
You can find me on Twitter atBenHSpratt.
For more information about CRS,visit us online at rodephsholom
.
org.
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