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May 1, 2025 36 mins

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Grief is not simply the absence of someone we love—it can also be the absence of what we deserved but never received. In this profound conversation with counselor and trauma specialist Fonda Miller, we explore the often-overlooked dimensions of loss and healing that shape our emotional lives.

Fonda shares a perspective on grief that transforms how we understand our deepest sorrows. Using the striking image of a balanced teeter-totter, she explains how the weight of our grief directly corresponds to the depth of our love—making grief itself a testament to how deeply we connected with what we've lost. "It's a gift," she says, "because what it says is I loved deeply and I was loved deeply."

But what about the grief that comes from never having what we deserved? Fonda guides us through understanding childhood trauma as a form of hidden grief that follows people into adulthood, often without recognition. Through powerful metaphors like pressure cookers and release valves, she offers insights into how we can support those carrying these invisible burdens.

As a certified Mental Health First Aid trainer who's worked with trauma victims across various contexts, Fonda brings extraordinary wisdom to everyday situations we all encounter. She explains how to notice when someone might be struggling with unprocessed trauma and provides practical guidance for creating safe spaces where healing can begin. The conversation touches on everything from talking to children about death to supporting survivors of trafficking and abuse.

Whether you're processing your own grief or supporting someone through theirs, this episode offers compassionate perspectives that honor the complexity of human suffering while providing pathways toward healing. Because as Fonda reminds us, "Everyone is facing something"—and understanding this truth is the first step toward greater kindness in our world.

Join us in exploring how grief, in all its forms, connects to our deepest capacity for love and resilience.

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