February 15, 2024 • 29 mins
Unlock the secrets of your inner self as I, Roland Perez, alongside our esteemed guest David Delrahim, guide you through the labyrinth of the human ego and its profound impact on our wellness. Prepare to have your perceptions transformed as we reveal the dual nature of ego—the driving force behind humanity's greatest innovations and the shadow that can lead to conflict and desolation. Together, we navigate the terrain of 'good' and 'bad' ego, carefully threading the line between ambition and humility, and illuminating the peaks and valleys that make up the rich tapestry of our lives.
Our conversation with David Delrahim offers a fresh perspective on how the ego can be both a formidable adversary and a powerful ally in our quest for harmony and purpose. We demystify age-old misconceptions about ego's correlation with age and wisdom, emphasizing the pivotal role of personal responsibility and the transformative magic of living in the moment. Embrace the wisdom shared in our enlightening exchange, and learn how to master your ego to forge a path of inner peace and fulfillment.
From the producers of PBS's American Health Journal and Innovations in Medicine. Thank you for listening to Better Wellness.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Roland Perez (00:01):
We all have egos.
There's nothing wrong withhaving an ego.
There's nothing wrong withfeeling important, but the ego
needs to be regulated.
There are ways to control yourego, Keep it from harming you
and instead help your egoelevate you.
Welcome to Better Wellness.
I'm your host, Roland Perez,and we're listening to a podcast
(00:22):
that explores the newestinnovations in true wellness.
As the executive producer ofthe American Health Journal for
more than 25 years, I'veproduced over 500 30-minute
award-winning television showsthat air nationally on PBS with
an audience of over 100 millionviewers.
But Better Wellness is morethan all that Not only keeping
(00:45):
your body healthy, butdeveloping a mindset and balance
that prevents illness.
Our guests are experiencedexperts in the world of staying
healthy, young and well.
And let's start.
Our first guest is DavidDelrahim, a friend and a
visionary, and an expert inwellness.
I wanted to talk to you todayabout ego, David.
(01:09):
What is ego?
David Delrahim (01:11):
You know how many times perhaps a day, we ask
ourselves or we tell each otherpart your ego, stop your ego,
get a hold of your ego.
Oh, this conversation came fromthe ego, or that thought
process was egotistical.
(01:32):
We say that.
So what is ego Is what sets usapart as a human being from all
other beings.
Lately I've been hearing goodego versus bad ego.
Well, it's all ego.
(01:57):
Ego gives us the ability, theanalytical ability, to be able
to analyze.
That's why we have better, wehave worse.
You know, with the animals,they don't.
You know what we say dogs, theyhave unconditional love.
There's only one love that theyknow.
They don't know better, theydon't know worse.
(02:19):
They don't know the rightindividual.
There's only one, Because thereis no analytical and there is
no ego present.
The same with the trees, thesame with the ocean fish, all of
them.
There's zero ego.
So is ego a good thing or a badthing?
(02:43):
So when we are born at thepoint I call it at the point of
zero, when we are born, we arestarting at point A.
Imagine, and the rest of it isa journey that we go through
point A to B to C, all the way.
The code and code good ego,which is a seed ego.
(03:06):
It elevates us, we go up, weexperience elevations and growth
in life.
So we go up the code and code.
Bad ego is what pulls us down,so we go down.
(03:27):
And if there is no ego, we justgo out into a straight line.
There is no up, there is nodown, it's just a straight line.
So ego is what we want it to be.
The ego is essential for us tohave the growth to move forward
(03:54):
in life, to have a betterunderstanding of life, to come
up with all of these creations.
The human ego has helped thehuman to grow, to come up with
all of these inventions.
It's a good thing.
At the same time, the human egohas been a huge downside to the
(04:22):
humans.
The killing, all the harms thatwe put on each other in the war
came from ego.
You know, the wars come fromego.
Even right now, in the 21stcentury, this country versus
(04:48):
that country and that countrywants to move and get another
piece of another country.
What is it Ego?
I want to be the supreme power.
Roland Perez (04:59):
Okay, we're talking about wellness.
How does ego work in thewellness space?
David Delrahim (05:08):
Well, you know there are three ways that ego
can go A straight line, upwardand a downward.
The upward it creates thehigher vibrations which really
helps us to be more joyful andless pain.
A straight line is just astraight line, it's not doing
(05:32):
anything.
When it goes down, it just ismore painful.
It's just painful, so dependsupon which way it goes.
Down or up is really.
That is wellness.
Roland Perez (05:50):
How does it affect your life?
David Delrahim (05:53):
You know what the anger being angry at
something stress.
Roland Perez (06:02):
Which comes basically from being thinking
you're the best, somebody elsesays they're better, and then
there's anger, and that's whatthe basis of this is.
David Delrahim (06:13):
You know what the anger that comes in is a
some sort of an analyticalprocess that happens that we get
triggered as a result.
All right, we do not like to ananswer or hear something or an
statement or an action.
(06:34):
You know, we get triggered andwe get angry because what we are
hearing or what we are seeingis against our own belief system
and our ego tells us that yourbelief system is absolute.
(06:56):
It's what is right.
Everything else is wrong.
That is ego and, as a result,we get angry.
Roland Perez (07:03):
They're the stress .
David Delrahim (07:05):
And the stress and so on and so forth, and the
pain, the mental pain, you know,emotional pain, which
everything goes into the bodyand becomes body pain.
Roland Perez (07:18):
I don't know if you can answer the question, but
somebody's going to say whatcauses ego, what brings it on?
David Delrahim (07:28):
Ego exists just because we are human.
Yeah, ego, it's just somethingthat you are born with, all
right.
What you do with it is justlike everything else in life.
We always say you live in thelife that you create for
yourself, right?
Do you want that life to befull of ego?
(07:48):
That's your choice, you know,is a free will.
But what you do with it, youknow, do you use that ego to go
upward, which I call it wellness, or to go downward, which is a
total ego, which is a totalillness?
(08:08):
Who is in charge?
Roland Perez (08:10):
You.
David Delrahim (08:13):
But we would like to point fingers at
everything around us exceptourselves.
Roland Perez (08:20):
Basically the thing you've always said, which
is taking responsibility.
Yes, Tough question, but how doyou control it and how do you
control ego?
David Delrahim (08:35):
The way we control the ego is to understand
what ego is.
You know, it's almost likehaving a friend, an enemy, in
the shell of a friend.
Once you know what you aredealing with, it's very easy,
much easier to manage.
(08:55):
If you don't, then you don'tand you get hurt.
So with the ego, in order tounderstand what it is, we have
to be present, we have to begrounded, and then we know what
is in front of us.
Is that there is an upwardopportunity that comes through
(09:17):
ego, which is, you know, ourvibration keeps going up, or is
it downward or just steady?
You know, I believe we findourselves more in the downward
because there are moreopportunities to go downward.
It's like sliding.
It's much easier to go down thehill than to climb up the hill.
Roland Perez (09:40):
When you do that, when you see that and you're
aware of it in a lot of ways howdo you elevate?
What do you do yourself, david?
What do you do to get yourselfout of it?
It happens to you, it's got tohappen to you, you're a human
being like everybody else, buthow do you lift yourself out of
it?
David Delrahim (10:00):
Being present.
Take a deep breath.
You know what we often hear,that when we get angry or we get
very emotional, say breathe.
That means, you know, bringmore oxygen inside your body.
And sometimes we cannot evenhandle this situation.
(10:23):
We go for a walk.
If we submit to the ego, we arereactive.
If we stay neutral and manageego which is a tough thing to do
we become present and we havean opportunity to become
(10:50):
proactive than reactive.
Roland Perez (10:54):
When do you know when your ego is causing you
harm Through a relationshipthat's going bad?
How do you know when your egois out of control and it's
causing you harm?
David Delrahim (11:09):
Well, you could reverse engineer the process of
playing through ego.
It always ends up with a bodypain or a mental pain.
Reverse engineering we've gonethrough perhaps a process of an
(11:38):
emotional exchange or a mentalexchange.
We reacted to that in a waythat it felt good for a split of
a second and after that therewas a regret and there was a
(12:02):
feeling of not good aboutyourself and about who you are.
You just surrender to darkness.
That is kind of the reverseengineering process of it.
Everything is opportunity inlife and we are in control.
(12:26):
If you say something, if you dosomething, you might position
yourself at the point of noreturn.
But as long as you stay neutral, you can always come back and
approach it from a proactive way, instead of building it, not
(12:48):
destroying it.
Roland Perez (12:50):
Doctors say that ego is age-driven.
No ego at six years old andless ego at 75.
Everything in between isego-driven, but before six
there's very little ego.
A five-year-old will walk up tothe president of the United
(13:11):
States and tug on his shirt.
He doesn't know what he's doing.
There is no ego there.
And then after 75, it seemsthat people start to accept
their life.
They're not changing anything,they go inward, they look for
themselves and they have lessego.
(13:34):
Do you believe that ego isage-driven?
David Delrahim (13:40):
I believe what is age-driven is wisdom.
That is definitely could beage-driven, because the wisdom
that we acquire is a byproductof the knowledge and the life
(14:01):
experience.
And at a much younger age, as achild, there's definitely ego.
At point zero, we are born withego.
The children, they use the artof manipulation through ego to
(14:25):
have an influence over theirparents and that's why the kids
jump up and down when they wantsomething.
What is that?
That is ego.
That is a guiding game tomanipulate, to get what they
want out of their parents.
And as we go through life,through the life experiences
(14:51):
some of them tough, some of themare easier we get wisdom, we
become wiser and later on, Ithink the ego is there.
It's just the wisdom that comesin in contact with the ego and
(15:13):
we are more balanced.
It is not about we are havingless or we are having more, we
just more.
Wisdom is almost like fire andice or fire and water.
They come together and it isless intense.
Roland Perez (15:33):
Talk about ego for all sorts of things, but one of
the things that really isinteresting is that ego also
drives relationships and familyunits.
So one person in the familywith a very strong ego can
(15:55):
develop problems within a familycircle.
David Delrahim (15:58):
Absolutely.
I believe the beginning ofeverything is us.
Everything starts with us Love.
You cannot love others untiltruly, until you start loving
yourself.
You cannot have a goodrelationship with others until
(16:21):
you have a good relationshipwith yourself.
Is ego going to get in the wayof a relationship of you and you
?
Absolutely so if ego caninterfere, the most intimate
(16:41):
relationship, which is you andyou, imagine what it can do with
your family members, with yourfriends, with anyone it is that
you have to see what is in frontof you.
Is it an upward ego or is itdownward ego?
The upward ego is a space oflove.
(17:05):
The downward ego is a space of.
That is really the ego that wesay we need to stay away from it
because it just sucks us down.
It just goes all the way down.
You know the hate, theresentment, all of these things
(17:28):
come from the downward.
As long as we are in love,which is the upward, everything
is great, even our relationshipwith the family members, maybe
with our spouses, with ourchildren, at any age.
And when it is the other side,it just destroys it.
(17:53):
Just, it's that fire that justburns.
Roland Perez (17:59):
Once ago I used to go to a meeting and it was
always dominated by one guy whowas very passionate about the
project that we were working onand he dominated the meeting.
And someone once said to mehe's very, very passionate, very
(18:19):
caring about the project andthat is why he takes over the
meeting.
And I turned to him and I saidthis is ego.
This is he's passionate aboutit, but he's using it to boost
his ego.
This is he's taking over themeeting.
Look how smart I am, look howgood-looking I am.
(18:41):
And to others it was a littledistracting.
To me it was totallydistracting because I know where
it was coming from.
It was coming from the ego, andyou probably, as a businessman,
have sat in meetings where theperson in front of you is just
spouting ego.
I mean, it's just.
I have a tendency just to shuthim off.
Do you have this?
(19:02):
Do you know what I mean when Isay there's people in front of
you that spout off ego and youdon't listen anymore.
You start turning them off.
David Delrahim (19:12):
Yes, you know it all goes down to the intention.
What the intention is it that?
Upward or downward, just likeego?
You know what the loveintentions is.
What we fear.
You know it comes from theheart, from a good place, all
(19:37):
right.
The intention which is in that,going down in that ego territory
, that it is not healthy, againyou would feel it.
And what does it mean?
It's just when ego comesthrough a channel of the
analytical channel which is, Iam better, that is the downward
(20:04):
ego.
You just feel it.
I mean you could be talkingabout a science project, but the
intention behind those wordsthey're coming out is something
that you would feel.
That is a downward and you sayit's all about him and that is
(20:30):
ego and his being ego testicle.
That is the general vicinitythat comes and the intention is
the channel that we built.
The intention again I want torepeat this is the channel that
we choose or we build.
Whatever it is in that channel.
(20:51):
If it is a loving intention, itis that upward high vibrations
makes you feel good, makes youfeel amazing.
If it is a downward, again youwould feel it.
It makes you uncomfortable.
You said this is all about ego.
(21:13):
He's being ego testicle I needto get out of here.
I just do not like to be inthis space.
Roland Perez (21:22):
That's the downside.
That's the downside.
The word ego, the wordarrogance and the word
selfishness.
I think there's a place wherethey connect.
I think that selfishness andarrogance has something to do
(21:49):
with ego.
What do you think?
David Delrahim (21:52):
I wholeheartedly believe again in that downward
ego space.
The selfishness is where itresides.
You know.
Arrogance is that's where it is.
Absolutely.
These are all the byproducts ofthe downward ego space.
(22:13):
You know what?
Wonder why we are added.
Let's add a few other thingsthat we are familiar with that
you know.
Hate, that's where it is.
Anger, that's where it is.
It's all cool, they're all init, they're all swimming
together, it's all.
They all come from the samepond.
(22:35):
You know there's there's zerolove in that is.
It's completely distinct.
You can know someone cannotswim in that Poisonous pond and
(22:57):
claim that has love.
It just doesn't work.
They don't mix.
It's like water and oil.
They do not mix.
Roland Perez (23:05):
Arrogance and selfishness, and it's just not
love and it is not yeah, don'tknow how we're going to run
ourselves into this, but it wasa question in a very famous book
25, 30 years ago ego inreligion, in faith, and a lot of
these preachers I Mean ticketwas clothing, huge cuff, links,
(23:33):
glorifying backgrounds andthey're speaking about God or
whatever they're doing, and youcan feel the ego coming through
the screen.
This is not Gandhi, this issomething else, and this comes.
This comes in certain faiththat the leader is Is Very, very
(23:57):
egotistical.
Have you noticed that?
David Delrahim (24:03):
Absolutely.
You know, religions Couldeasily be hijacked and the faith
and and be used as a platformof control to control people's
(24:23):
mind.
A lot of times, emotions Wealth.
All of it is a is it.
Roland Perez (24:35):
There's a.
There's a famous I'm not goingto mention them on air, but his
famous preacher that he starteda church to help people and the
more he spoke and the more hedid, he became more famous and
after a while the name of thechurch was below his name and
(24:56):
His name was above it.
So he became bigger than hischurch and when he died the
church collapsed Because it wasall ego right, ego.
David Delrahim (25:13):
Ego is, it's almost like air, it goes
anywhere and everywhere, it goesthrough all the cracks and it's
very expansive, and you know,that is why we need to meditate,
need to meditate, we need toground ourselves and Remind
(25:40):
ourselves who we are, where wecame from, and exercise humility
you know is all about, you know, increasing our capacity as the
ego comes in.
It doesn't push us outward, wedon't get blown up, it's just
(26:04):
being humble and Write down,exercise Humility, and that is
an exercise that it gives us theopportunity for the upward ego,
which is the love, or or wefall for it again.
You know, with that that fewseconds of fame, that as a human
(26:30):
sometimes we cannot resist thaturge, but is Downward and we
choose, we have choices,everything is a matter of choice
in life.
So religion is, is, is notreally Immune from this whole
(26:54):
exercise.
And even the religion, thepeople at the top, so Is ego in
there, absolutely?
Is ego everywhere?
Yes, it is.
Roland Perez (27:16):
What is your best advice for people that are
trying to curb their ego?
They're trying, they know that.
They know, like you said beforeand a few moments ago, that
they know that this is harmful.
Is there any advice you have oncurtailing your ego?
David Delrahim (27:37):
You know, it is a journey.
It is a journey to understandego, to live with ego in such a
way that it not only it doesn'tharm you, but it elevates you.
The same thing it goes 180 fromone end to another who is?
(28:02):
In charge, we who can turn thesame thing that can take me down
, take me and elevate me is me.
So I am the driver.
I Am as a human.
I am the driver is by beinggrounded, exercise humility and
(28:33):
Knowing that I have choices andeverything is within my power.
Roland Perez (28:41):
Thank, you, david.
Well, so much for ego.
And remember better wellness isavailable just about everywhere
, including Spotify, amazonmusic and iHeart radio.
So once again, thanks forsupporting better wellness.
I'm your host, roland Perez.
See you next time.
We all have egos.
There's nothing wrong withhaving an ego.
There's nothing wrong withfeeling important, but the ego
needs to be regulated.
There are ways to control yourego, Keep it from harming you
and instead help your egoelevate you.
Welcome to Better Wellness.
I'm your host, Roland Perez,and we're listening to a podcast
(00:22):
that explores the newestinnovations in true wellness.
As the executive producer ofthe American Health Journal for
more than 25 years, I'veproduced over 500 30-minute
award-winning television showsthat air nationally on PBS with
an audience of over 100 millionviewers.
But Better Wellness is morethan all that Not only keeping
(00:45):
your body healthy, butdeveloping a mindset and balance
that prevents illness.
Our guests are experiencedexperts in the world of staying
healthy, young and well.
And let's start.
Our first guest is DavidDelrahim, a friend and a
visionary, and an expert inwellness.
I wanted to talk to you todayabout ego, David.
(01:09):
What is ego?
David Delrahim (01:11):
You know how many times perhaps a day, we ask
ourselves or we tell each otherpart your ego, stop your ego,
get a hold of your ego.
Oh, this conversation came fromthe ego, or that thought
process was egotistical.
(01:32):
We say that.
So what is ego Is what sets usapart as a human being from all
other beings.
Lately I've been hearing goodego versus bad ego.
Well, it's all ego.
(01:57):
Ego gives us the ability, theanalytical ability, to be able
to analyze.
That's why we have better, wehave worse.
You know, with the animals,they don't.
You know what we say dogs, theyhave unconditional love.
There's only one love that theyknow.
They don't know better, theydon't know worse.
(02:19):
They don't know the rightindividual.
There's only one, Because thereis no analytical and there is
no ego present.
The same with the trees, thesame with the ocean fish, all of
them.
There's zero ego.
So is ego a good thing or a badthing?
(02:43):
So when we are born at thepoint I call it at the point of
zero, when we are born, we arestarting at point A.
Imagine, and the rest of it isa journey that we go through
point A to B to C, all the way.
The code and code good ego,which is a seed ego.
(03:06):
It elevates us, we go up, weexperience elevations and growth
in life.
So we go up the code and code.
Bad ego is what pulls us down,so we go down.
(03:27):
And if there is no ego, we justgo out into a straight line.
There is no up, there is nodown, it's just a straight line.
So ego is what we want it to be.
The ego is essential for us tohave the growth to move forward
(03:54):
in life, to have a betterunderstanding of life, to come
up with all of these creations.
The human ego has helped thehuman to grow, to come up with
all of these inventions.
It's a good thing.
At the same time, the human egohas been a huge downside to the
(04:22):
humans.
The killing, all the harms thatwe put on each other in the war
came from ego.
You know, the wars come fromego.
Even right now, in the 21stcentury, this country versus
(04:48):
that country and that countrywants to move and get another
piece of another country.
What is it Ego?
I want to be the supreme power.
Roland Perez (04:59):
Okay, we're talking about wellness.
How does ego work in thewellness space?
David Delrahim (05:08):
Well, you know there are three ways that ego
can go A straight line, upwardand a downward.
The upward it creates thehigher vibrations which really
helps us to be more joyful andless pain.
A straight line is just astraight line, it's not doing
(05:32):
anything.
When it goes down, it just ismore painful.
It's just painful, so dependsupon which way it goes.
Down or up is really.
That is wellness.
Roland Perez (05:50):
How does it affect your life?
David Delrahim (05:53):
You know what the anger being angry at
something stress.
Roland Perez (06:02):
Which comes basically from being thinking
you're the best, somebody elsesays they're better, and then
there's anger, and that's whatthe basis of this is.
David Delrahim (06:13):
You know what the anger that comes in is a
some sort of an analyticalprocess that happens that we get
triggered as a result.
All right, we do not like to ananswer or hear something or an
statement or an action.
(06:34):
You know, we get triggered andwe get angry because what we are
hearing or what we are seeingis against our own belief system
and our ego tells us that yourbelief system is absolute.
(06:56):
It's what is right.
Everything else is wrong.
That is ego and, as a result,we get angry.
Roland Perez (07:03):
They're the stress .
David Delrahim (07:05):
And the stress and so on and so forth, and the
pain, the mental pain, you know,emotional pain, which
everything goes into the bodyand becomes body pain.
Roland Perez (07:18):
I don't know if you can answer the question, but
somebody's going to say whatcauses ego, what brings it on?
David Delrahim (07:28):
Ego exists just because we are human.
Yeah, ego, it's just somethingthat you are born with, all
right.
What you do with it is justlike everything else in life.
We always say you live in thelife that you create for
yourself, right?
Do you want that life to befull of ego?
(07:48):
That's your choice, you know,is a free will.
But what you do with it, youknow, do you use that ego to go
upward, which I call it wellness, or to go downward, which is a
total ego, which is a totalillness?
(08:08):
Who is in charge?
Roland Perez (08:10):
You.
David Delrahim (08:13):
But we would like to point fingers at
everything around us exceptourselves.
Roland Perez (08:20):
Basically the thing you've always said, which
is taking responsibility.
Yes, Tough question, but how doyou control it and how do you
control ego?
David Delrahim (08:35):
The way we control the ego is to understand
what ego is.
You know, it's almost likehaving a friend, an enemy, in
the shell of a friend.
Once you know what you aredealing with, it's very easy,
much easier to manage.
(08:55):
If you don't, then you don'tand you get hurt.
So with the ego, in order tounderstand what it is, we have
to be present, we have to begrounded, and then we know what
is in front of us.
Is that there is an upwardopportunity that comes through
(09:17):
ego, which is, you know, ourvibration keeps going up, or is
it downward or just steady?
You know, I believe we findourselves more in the downward
because there are moreopportunities to go downward.
It's like sliding.
It's much easier to go down thehill than to climb up the hill.
Roland Perez (09:40):
When you do that, when you see that and you're
aware of it in a lot of ways howdo you elevate?
What do you do yourself, david?
What do you do to get yourselfout of it?
It happens to you, it's got tohappen to you, you're a human
being like everybody else, buthow do you lift yourself out of
it?
David Delrahim (10:00):
Being present.
Take a deep breath.
You know what we often hear,that when we get angry or we get
very emotional, say breathe.
That means, you know, bringmore oxygen inside your body.
And sometimes we cannot evenhandle this situation.
(10:23):
We go for a walk.
If we submit to the ego, we arereactive.
If we stay neutral and manageego which is a tough thing to do
we become present and we havean opportunity to become
(10:50):
proactive than reactive.
Roland Perez (10:54):
When do you know when your ego is causing you
harm Through a relationshipthat's going bad?
How do you know when your egois out of control and it's
causing you harm?
David Delrahim (11:09):
Well, you could reverse engineer the process of
playing through ego.
It always ends up with a bodypain or a mental pain.
Reverse engineering we've gonethrough perhaps a process of an
(11:38):
emotional exchange or a mentalexchange.
We reacted to that in a waythat it felt good for a split of
a second and after that therewas a regret and there was a
(12:02):
feeling of not good aboutyourself and about who you are.
You just surrender to darkness.
That is kind of the reverseengineering process of it.
Everything is opportunity inlife and we are in control.
(12:26):
If you say something, if you dosomething, you might position
yourself at the point of noreturn.
But as long as you stay neutral, you can always come back and
approach it from a proactive way, instead of building it, not
(12:48):
destroying it.
Roland Perez (12:50):
Doctors say that ego is age-driven.
No ego at six years old andless ego at 75.
Everything in between isego-driven, but before six
there's very little ego.
A five-year-old will walk up tothe president of the United
(13:11):
States and tug on his shirt.
He doesn't know what he's doing.
There is no ego there.
And then after 75, it seemsthat people start to accept
their life.
They're not changing anything,they go inward, they look for
themselves and they have lessego.
(13:34):
Do you believe that ego isage-driven?
David Delrahim (13:40):
I believe what is age-driven is wisdom.
That is definitely could beage-driven, because the wisdom
that we acquire is a byproductof the knowledge and the life
(14:01):
experience.
And at a much younger age, as achild, there's definitely ego.
At point zero, we are born withego.
The children, they use the artof manipulation through ego to
(14:25):
have an influence over theirparents and that's why the kids
jump up and down when they wantsomething.
What is that?
That is ego.
That is a guiding game tomanipulate, to get what they
want out of their parents.
And as we go through life,through the life experiences
(14:51):
some of them tough, some of themare easier we get wisdom, we
become wiser and later on, Ithink the ego is there.
It's just the wisdom that comesin in contact with the ego and
(15:13):
we are more balanced.
It is not about we are havingless or we are having more, we
just more.
Wisdom is almost like fire andice or fire and water.
They come together and it isless intense.
Roland Perez (15:33):
Talk about ego for all sorts of things, but one of
the things that really isinteresting is that ego also
drives relationships and familyunits.
So one person in the familywith a very strong ego can
(15:55):
develop problems within a familycircle.
David Delrahim (15:58):
Absolutely.
I believe the beginning ofeverything is us.
Everything starts with us Love.
You cannot love others untiltruly, until you start loving
yourself.
You cannot have a goodrelationship with others until
(16:21):
you have a good relationshipwith yourself.
Is ego going to get in the wayof a relationship of you and you
?
Absolutely so if ego caninterfere, the most intimate
(16:41):
relationship, which is you andyou, imagine what it can do with
your family members, with yourfriends, with anyone it is that
you have to see what is in frontof you.
Is it an upward ego or is itdownward ego?
The upward ego is a space oflove.
(17:05):
The downward ego is a space of.
That is really the ego that wesay we need to stay away from it
because it just sucks us down.
It just goes all the way down.
You know the hate, theresentment, all of these things
(17:28):
come from the downward.
As long as we are in love,which is the upward, everything
is great, even our relationshipwith the family members, maybe
with our spouses, with ourchildren, at any age.
And when it is the other side,it just destroys it.
(17:53):
Just, it's that fire that justburns.
Roland Perez (17:59):
Once ago I used to go to a meeting and it was
always dominated by one guy whowas very passionate about the
project that we were working onand he dominated the meeting.
And someone once said to mehe's very, very passionate, very
(18:19):
caring about the project andthat is why he takes over the
meeting.
And I turned to him and I saidthis is ego.
This is he's passionate aboutit, but he's using it to boost
his ego.
This is he's taking over themeeting.
Look how smart I am, look howgood-looking I am.
(18:41):
And to others it was a littledistracting.
To me it was totallydistracting because I know where
it was coming from.
It was coming from the ego, andyou probably, as a businessman,
have sat in meetings where theperson in front of you is just
spouting ego.
I mean, it's just.
I have a tendency just to shuthim off.
Do you have this?
(19:02):
Do you know what I mean when Isay there's people in front of
you that spout off ego and youdon't listen anymore.
You start turning them off.
David Delrahim (19:12):
Yes, you know it all goes down to the intention.
What the intention is it that?
Upward or downward, just likeego?
You know what the loveintentions is.
What we fear.
You know it comes from theheart, from a good place, all
(19:37):
right.
The intention which is in that,going down in that ego territory
, that it is not healthy, againyou would feel it.
And what does it mean?
It's just when ego comesthrough a channel of the
analytical channel which is, Iam better, that is the downward
(20:04):
ego.
You just feel it.
I mean you could be talkingabout a science project, but the
intention behind those wordsthey're coming out is something
that you would feel.
That is a downward and you sayit's all about him and that is
(20:30):
ego and his being ego testicle.
That is the general vicinitythat comes and the intention is
the channel that we built.
The intention again I want torepeat this is the channel that
we choose or we build.
Whatever it is in that channel.
(20:51):
If it is a loving intention, itis that upward high vibrations
makes you feel good, makes youfeel amazing.
If it is a downward, again youwould feel it.
It makes you uncomfortable.
You said this is all about ego.
(21:13):
He's being ego testicle I needto get out of here.
I just do not like to be inthis space.
Roland Perez (21:22):
That's the downside.
That's the downside.
The word ego, the wordarrogance and the word
selfishness.
I think there's a place wherethey connect.
I think that selfishness andarrogance has something to do
(21:49):
with ego.
What do you think?
David Delrahim (21:52):
I wholeheartedly believe again in that downward
ego space.
The selfishness is where itresides.
You know.
Arrogance is that's where it is.
Absolutely.
These are all the byproducts ofthe downward ego space.
(22:13):
You know what?
Wonder why we are added.
Let's add a few other thingsthat we are familiar with that
you know.
Hate, that's where it is.
Anger, that's where it is.
It's all cool, they're all init, they're all swimming
together, it's all.
They all come from the samepond.
(22:35):
You know there's there's zerolove in that is.
It's completely distinct.
You can know someone cannotswim in that Poisonous pond and
(22:57):
claim that has love.
It just doesn't work.
They don't mix.
It's like water and oil.
They do not mix.
Roland Perez (23:05):
Arrogance and selfishness, and it's just not
love and it is not yeah, don'tknow how we're going to run
ourselves into this, but it wasa question in a very famous book
25, 30 years ago ego inreligion, in faith, and a lot of
these preachers I Mean ticketwas clothing, huge cuff, links,
(23:33):
glorifying backgrounds andthey're speaking about God or
whatever they're doing, and youcan feel the ego coming through
the screen.
This is not Gandhi, this issomething else, and this comes.
This comes in certain faiththat the leader is Is Very, very
(23:57):
egotistical.
Have you noticed that?
David Delrahim (24:03):
Absolutely.
You know, religions Couldeasily be hijacked and the faith
and and be used as a platformof control to control people's
(24:23):
mind.
A lot of times, emotions Wealth.
All of it is a is it.
Roland Perez (24:35):
There's a.
There's a famous I'm not goingto mention them on air, but his
famous preacher that he starteda church to help people and the
more he spoke and the more hedid, he became more famous and
after a while the name of thechurch was below his name and
(24:56):
His name was above it.
So he became bigger than hischurch and when he died the
church collapsed Because it wasall ego right, ego.
David Delrahim (25:13):
Ego is, it's almost like air, it goes
anywhere and everywhere, it goesthrough all the cracks and it's
very expansive, and you know,that is why we need to meditate,
need to meditate, we need toground ourselves and Remind
(25:40):
ourselves who we are, where wecame from, and exercise humility
you know is all about, you know, increasing our capacity as the
ego comes in.
It doesn't push us outward, wedon't get blown up, it's just
(26:04):
being humble and Write down,exercise Humility, and that is
an exercise that it gives us theopportunity for the upward ego,
which is the love, or or wefall for it again.
You know, with that that fewseconds of fame, that as a human
(26:30):
sometimes we cannot resist thaturge, but is Downward and we
choose, we have choices,everything is a matter of choice
in life.
So religion is, is, is notreally Immune from this whole
(26:54):
exercise.
And even the religion, thepeople at the top, so Is ego in
there, absolutely?
Is ego everywhere?
Yes, it is.
Roland Perez (27:16):
What is your best advice for people that are
trying to curb their ego?
They're trying, they know that.
They know, like you said beforeand a few moments ago, that
they know that this is harmful.
Is there any advice you have oncurtailing your ego?
David Delrahim (27:37):
You know, it is a journey.
It is a journey to understandego, to live with ego in such a
way that it not only it doesn'tharm you, but it elevates you.
The same thing it goes 180 fromone end to another who is?
(28:02):
In charge, we who can turn thesame thing that can take me down
, take me and elevate me is me.
So I am the driver.
I Am as a human.
I am the driver is by beinggrounded, exercise humility and
(28:33):
Knowing that I have choices andeverything is within my power.
Roland Perez (28:41):
Thank, you, david.
Well, so much for ego.
And remember better wellness isavailable just about everywhere
, including Spotify, amazonmusic and iHeart radio.
So once again, thanks forsupporting better wellness.
I'm your host, roland Perez.
See you next time.
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