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November 13, 2024 14 mins

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In today’s episode, we’re talking about setting an intentional goal for the next 30 days to keep your military-to-civilian transition on track, even during the busy holiday season.

I share practical strategies for staying focused and progressing toward your next chapter, whether you’re looking for a job, planning to start school, or just getting ready to transition out of the military.

The goal is simple: keep moving forward with intention, even when holiday distractions are pulling at you.

Full show notes here: https://wendiwray.com/245

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P.S.If you enjoyed this podcast, I'd love to ask you to follow and leave a quick review. It only takes 30 seconds, but it makes a huge difference to my show. Click here to open Beyond the Military in Apple Podcasts to leave your review.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Wendi (00:00):
Welcome to Beyond the Military Podcast, a space for
military women determined tofocus on life outside of the
military.
As a fellow woman veteran whoonce felt lost after leaving the
military, I know firsthand thechallenges that we face.
Hi, my name is Wendi Wray, awoman of God, wife, mom of

(00:20):
three, army veteran.
Life and career coach, and I'mon a mission to equip and
empower women like yourself toexcel in life and career with
confidence.
In this podcast, you'll walkaway with a tool that will help
you navigate your career andlife mentally and emotionally
during and beyond your service.

(00:42):
So if you're ready to go fromstuck to confident, this podcast
is for you.
Loosen up your laces and grab acoffee because it's time to step
up.
Into a new chapter with clarityand confidence.
/Hello and welcome to episode245.
I am so excited that you aretuning in today.

(01:02):
And if you've been tuning in forthe last 244 episodes, I just
want to say thank you so muchfor coming back and tuning into
another episode.
And if you stumbled upon thispodcast, I want to welcome you.
And also just hope that you getthe most out of this episode.
And listen, you all, if youhaven't given me a review, I

(01:25):
want to ask you for a huge favortoday.
And that is for you to scrolldown to the very bottom of the
podcast platform that you aretuning in from, and leave me a
review.
Let me know what you'reenjoying.
Let me know what you want tohear more about or even just let
me know what you are possiblywanting more of as well.
So any feedback on there isgreatly appreciated.

(01:45):
Not only to continue to providemore content for you, but also
to be able to reach more womenthat are transitioning out of
the military, or even justwanting to, feel encouraged
about their life, their career,their emotional well being, just
being a leader in the militaryor even in the civilian sector.
So today's focus is going to beabout setting a goal.

(02:09):
Based on where you are in yourmilitary transition into the
civilian sector.
And that could be either youlooking for a job opportunity.
It could mean you go intoschool.
It can mean juice, simply justgetting out and figuring out
what you're going to do when youget out of the military, if
you're not even there yet.
So whatever it may be, I hopethat you use this or find it

(02:31):
useful.
Whatever that may look like foryou.
My hopes is that you use this asa way for you to set a goal for
the next 30 days., because it'sgoing to help you at the very
beginning of next year, becausewhat's happening now.
If you are applying foropportunities, you may or may
not get a call.

(02:52):
During this time but for sureyou may be getting looked at
early next year.
And so I want to provide you anidea of what you could be
focused on for the next 30 days.
And that is just simply creatinga goal on what you're going to
hone in on because this willallow you to not only get better

(03:13):
at that one thing, but alsopossibly even get ahead for when
that time does come.
Right.
Because here's what happens withour brain when.
We are in the holiday season oras we are approaching.
The the, the end of the year,for some reason, our mind wants
to go and like autopilot.
And we just want to relax andjust not worry about our

(03:38):
transition or not worry aboutthis new job, not worry about
the school that I'm going to begoing to, or just the military
transition in general.
Right?
Maybe your VA appointments maybewhen you're doing your left
seat, right seat, yourtransition out of that role.
So I want to shed some light onyes.
It is time for you to also havefun with the family, spend time

(04:02):
decorating, spend time, whateveryou typically do on the holidays
and that could be like visitingfamily, traveling and everything
else.
But I also want you to keep thisgoal that you are going to set
for yourself for the next 30days.
To be focused on still makingprogress and wherever you are,
because again, our mind wants tosay no Wendi.

(04:22):
Let's not focus on writing theessay or thinking about what
schools we're going to, youknow, go after we get out or
apply to let's just focus onwhat's going to feel good.
And that's eating all theholiday desserts, drinking, all
the caffeine, all the holidaydrinks.
Or just, you know, escaping fromwhat needs to be done.
So again, I'm, not saying thatyou shouldn't have fun or enjoy

(04:46):
the holiday season.
What I'm saying here is to stayfocused on what's going to help
you to make progress.
And also to continue to bealongside with your timeline in
where you want to go.
Right.
And that could be again into acivilian role it could be into
your education.
It could just be with, you know,your family.
And so I just want to give youan example.

(05:07):
To help you.
Stay encouraged and also to helpyou continue to guide your mind.
When you are feeling like, okay,no, no one's hiring right now.
No, one's going to interview me.
So I'm just going to like, putthat all away and then reconvene
in January.
And so when January comes,you're like starting all over
and you have to get your mindback into it.

(05:29):
And that sometimes can not bethe best option for us,
especially if you already havelike a thousand things going on.
So again, I want you to thinkabout it as if you are getting
ready to run 10 miles.
And if you're like, okay, I'mjust not going to run at all
until January, but I have to runmid January.

(05:49):
And now you've taken a whole,almost 60 days.
You know, break you've been onthe couch.
You've been eating, you've been,doing everything but working out
or getting ready for that run.
And now you are expecting yourbody to just go running at the
time that you were runningbefore, when obviously that may
or may not happen, because nowyour body's going to have to.

(06:10):
get back into that groove, it'snot realistic.
So very similar with writing aresume or preparing for an
interview or writing that uplocation for the schools or, you
know, preparing for, you tospend time with the family, you
know, intentionally whateverthat may look like for you, or
maybe, you know, planning thatwedding or.
Whatever that looks like foryou.

(06:31):
And so I want to encourage youtoday.
To set one goal.
On what you're going to do.
So, for example, if you aretransitioning into the cyclical
sector, like February, Marchtimeframe, And you're like,
okay, well, there are no eventshappening.
Or I don't want to write aresume because I'm not going to
apply until January anyways.

(06:52):
You're just going to pauseeverything and put everything on
hold.
Then I recommend that you onenot do that, but to focusing on
the hardest thing that you don'twant to do.
So if it's the resume, I wantyou to focus on the resume for
the next 30 days.
And that could mean, it could,you could start by looking at
what that job description is,right.

(07:12):
Like looking at to dissecting.
Okay.
Based on this job description,what can I pull?
What skills, what competencies,what qualifications are required
for me to ensure that are on myresume.
So then you can, you know, startlooking at that.
And again, It doesn't have to beall in one day.
You can break that down, breakthat into a week.

(07:32):
Then the next week.
Okay.
Now I'm going to apply.
The actual bullets to thisresume.
If you're in the interviewphase, or like, let's say,
they're like, okay, now, youknow, we've scheduled an
interview for sometime inDecember.
Okay.
Great.
How can you prepare now for thisinterview?
Right.
You're going to take the Xamount of days that you need.
To prepare that could be, youknow, asking your spouse to help

(07:55):
you prepare a friend., anotherleader, someone that you can
trust that with that.
Is going to give you.
Actual real feedback.
And not sugar coat, anything.
And so again, depending on whereyou are, So, if you are in a
phase where you're, you know,you're getting out the end of
this year or early next year,and you are going to start

(08:18):
school, let's just say beginningof next year, what can you do to
prepare for that?
Again?
You don't have to have adetailed plan.
But just getting, situated,maybe with a platform that
there'll be using right.
For, the courses or the toolsthat you'll be using, getting
more in the know of that.

(08:39):
You're planning your wedding oryou're planning something
significant that's happeningearly in the year.
Maybe you're having a baby.
Like how can you prepare thesethings during the holiday
madness during the holidayseason?
And continue to make progressand do things in a way where,
you know, you're going to bemaking progress.
So, what I want you to do todayand encourage you to do is of

(09:00):
course, if you're not driving ordoing anything else, if you are
pause episode and come back to,to this.
Because I want you to just do orwrite out two things, write out
exactly what you're going tofocus on the next 30 days.
So you could say something assimple as I will focus on,
refining my resume for 10 jobdescriptions.

(09:22):
And I'll do it by this date.
So I'll do it by November, byDecember 15th.
Let's just say.
So then when you do that one,you are taking it serious that
you're going to mainly focus onthis one thing.
You're not going to focus oninterview prep.
You're not going to focus oncreating stories for, you know,

(09:44):
These bullet points.
You're primarily only going tofocus on refining your resume
for these 10 roles.
And again, I'm just giving anexample.
It could be three roles for you.
It going to be 20 rolls,whatever it may be.
When you do that, you're.
You're telling yourself, andyou're reminding yourself of
what you're going to do.
And then you're going to giveyourself a timeframe.

(10:05):
And listen, you all weremilitary.
We, we literally.
Do everything by a timeline.
By any hard time that we aregiven.
And so I want you to use this.
As a way to remind yourself thatwhat needs to be done for you as
you're getting out during aholiday season during a time
that it's a very busy., time forfamily and can also be.

(10:28):
You know, emotionally draining,because as some of you may know,
I have lost my sister now fortwo years.
And it's, it's been hard duringthe holidays to say the least.
And it's not something that,yes, I am happy about.
I'm excited, but it's stillsomething that I have to deal
with.
And I have to be aware.

(10:48):
About when those emotions docome up.
And so I want to encourage you,regardless of what the holidays
mean to you.
Regardless of, you know, whatcomes up for you during this
time?
I want you to use a safe,focused, to stay focused, to
stay prepared, to stay ahead ofthe game.
And to continue to makeprogress.
This is honestly the reason why.

(11:11):
And one of the reasons why Iwanted to share this with you
all is because last year I hadto do this for me intentionally,
because I still had aone-year-old, and I think, yes,
she had just turned one.
And then on top of that, I had,you know, all these negative
emotions come up about.
You know, it's just, it's, it'sa great time, but it's still a

(11:31):
time where a little bit ofsadness creeps in and at the
same time, You know, gratitudecomes in, right.
And so doing something that'sgoing to help you to stay on
task, to help you stay focused.
And to help you make progressbecause here's the truth.
You all, it's literally 45 days.
That we sometimes take forgranted and we sometimes kind of

(11:54):
say, well, we're done with theyear.
Bye.
Like November 27th when the yearthey're still more days more
time to the year.
And so I want to encourage youto finish strong.
I want to encourage you to keepdoing what needs to be done in
order for you to be.
You know, at that as successfulas possible.
In that next phase of your lifeeither is your military

(12:14):
transition either it's inpreparation for another.
You know, phase of your life.
I want you to say encourage, butwe have to do this by being
intentional about what we'rethinking.
What's coming up, guiding ourmind with.
Okay.
We don't want to do it.
You have to put up the Christmastree or we're gonna, you know,
go holiday shopping or we haveto beat, you know, the black

(12:37):
Friday deals.
But we also need to beconsidering.
What really matters here, right?
Like, what's that next phasestill continuing to focus on
that.
And not just throw it all away.
And then expect to run the 10miles.
You know, January when youhaven't done any running for the
last 45 days.

(12:58):
So again, I hope that this isuseful.
I hope that you use this quicklittle two-minute activity
again, write down exactly whatyou're going to focus on for the
next 30 days or whatever amountof days.
Exactly what you're going to do.
Write your deadline and thencome back and see exactly where
do you need to be so that youknow exactly what you're going

(13:20):
to be doing, what you're goingto focus on.
And what happens to during thattime, you'll see different
things.
You're going to be like, okay,now that I'm only focusing on
one thing and this one thingonly.
During my military transitioninto the civilian sector.
Then I can be completely honestabout not wanting to enter this
role or not wanting to pursuethis, specific role because it

(13:42):
requires the skills and I don'thave them, or I don't have that
much experience in them, but Ialso,, I'm not aligned with this
career growth career path forthis specific role.
So again, I hope that, this isuseful.
Let me know through a review orjust send me a direct message on
LinkedIn.
If you have not connected withme on LinkedIn, I want to invite

(14:02):
you to come connect with me.
Because I will also be sharingon LinkedIn.
My event.
There'll be hosting earlyDecember.
All right.
Well, you have a great rest ofyour week.
Talk to you soon.
Bye.
Hey lady, if this podcast helpedyou, challenged you or inspired
you in some way, please leave mea written review for the show on
Apple Podcasts and share it withanother military sister.

(14:24):
Please join us in the militarywomen community on Facebook at
bit.
ly forward slash beyond themilitary GRP.
Again, it is.
Bitly beyond the military GRP.
All right.
Talk to you soon.
Bye
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