Ep. 198 - Kirkland Krueger - A Nightmare on Elm Street (2010)

This week Nick and Chris are taking a look at what happens when remakes go wrong as they talk the 2010 version of A Nightmare on Elm Street. Starring Jackie Earle Haley and Rooney Mara.

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Episode Transcript

(00:44):
Hey everybody, welcome to big dumb monsters.
I'm Chris. I'm Nick.
And I'm disappointed in this week's movie because it sucks.
Yeah, it really did. Yeah.
Was this my suggestion? I think it was.
This is your fault. Yeah.
Oh, actually just remembered something I have to tell you
after we're done recording. All right?

(01:04):
Yeah. No.
We watched the 2010 remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street.
That's a fucking nightmare, all right?
It it's it is a personal nightmare on film St. because
this movie, it's there's nothinggood about it.
Like there's nothing. There's nothing.
Not true. There are good things sprinkled
into this movie. They're just.

(01:24):
They just don't make it a good movie.
Yeah, they don't cohere togetherto make a good movie.
Yeah, it's just disappointing. Just disappointing, but we'll
let you listen to us ramble about that for like an hour and
20 minutes. So here we go.
We're talking about the crappierversion of Nightmare on Elm
Street on big dumb monsters. This movie sucks.

(02:26):
What's up, nerds? And there we our camera looks
super fucking low right now. It is.
Who's with our stuff? I had to lower it the other day
because it looks it comes like there we go.
That's too high. Well, it.
Bounces back a. Little that's garage ceiling.
What's up, everybody? Yeah.
It's fine. It is Monday night.

(02:49):
You know what? That this right here not going
to be the worst thing about thisevening.
Oh no no, the movie is by far the worst thing about this
fucking evening. I I'm really sad because like
this could have been good and there are good things in it.
Yes, I I will say I like the idea.

(03:11):
There was. Oh, I know why.
Hold on. Sorry, sorry.
Oh no, wait, no, this should be fine.
Don't make me rent this piece ofshit on fucking.
There we go. We're fine.
Everything's fine. What are you doing?
Why is it doing this? I don't want to spend another

(03:34):
$4.00 on this fucking movie. Is it because you watched it
once already? No, it's like I have 48 hours
anyway. We're yeah yeah, I'm just going
to rent it on Amazon yeah, we'rewatching the shitty night right
on Elm Street folks, The 2000 it's it is fucking criminal.

(03:55):
It's criminally bad. But I was going to say I like
the concept of like doing like aFreddy character without the
goofy comedy like Part 2. It do like a straight serious
like terrifying taken not that the original wasn't terrifying
the. The first movie had a lot less
laugh in it. I think a lot of people forget.

(04:17):
That yeah, yeah, yeah. We talked about that when we did
it on the show. Yeah, yeah, because like the the
the character of Freddy Krueger got outlandish and he got like
more and more cartoonish the further the movies went on.
But this like the the idea that they're going for here, you

(04:37):
know, like let's do a modern take.
Let's, you know, change the character a little bit.
I like that they just they didn't try to do the same make
up on just a different guy. I like it.
It came out better in my opinion.
Like, I don't know. It looks like a real burn
victim. Yes, but it looks more Fire

(04:58):
Marshall Bill Ish than than likea little than it should, Yeah.
Yeah, he does want to show me something.
Yeah, but like there was a lot that they could have done with

(05:19):
this to make it really good, andthey didn't.
And I think one of the biggest cripes that I have is that it's
like it's introducing all these characters that I don't care
about. They don't give anybody, like,
real personality other than the the the two edgy characters who

(05:43):
wind up being, you know, Quentinand Nancy.
Yeah. Everybody else's throw away and
there's like no, the original has this like grit to it.
This like it has a grindhouse quality to it, which you get

(06:07):
from Wes Craven 'cause that's where he comes from.
Like like that movie, even though there's a couple parts
that are like goofy or whatever,it makes you feel like a little
dirty, a little uncomfortable. Yeah, like, uneasy, like, yeah.
This doesn't so much have that. This is like the same thing that

(06:28):
I talked about with Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
It's like clean and polished, yes, and I don't think it is.
That's the approach for this. Yeah, and like with Texas
Chainsaw Massacre also, like if you're going to call yourself A
Nightmare on Elm Street, like you have to bring fucking a game
everything. Yeah, This game, this movie does

(06:49):
not bring a game anything. I.
Do I do appreciate what they didin practical CG was fucking
atrocious. Piss fucking poor CG.
Yeah, the scene and like where? Like he's coming through.
The wall. They did it practical the first
time and it looked amazing. It looked amazing in 1984 and
you fuckers couldn't even do it half as good.

(07:11):
In 2010. Yeah, you got to be shitting me.
By the way, it like before yesterday, if you'd asked me
when this came out, I would havetold you like 5 or 6 years ago.
No, 2010, yeah, although I couldhave sworn I saw this with
Amanda at the drive in and this is 3 years before I met her.
Yeah. Fucking 20 like it.

(07:35):
That doesn't seem right. Like it doesn't.
It does not seem like. 15 years old.
It does not feel like this came out that long ago.
Yeah, that is crazy. Yeah.
But this movie, yeah, it's just soulless, whereas the original
one has a fucking soul to it that you can just feel it's
which will parallel. I will parallel anyway in the

(07:57):
better, not the the crapshoot later on.
Yeah, because I saw a fucking movie this week.
Oh yeah. Oh yeah, sinners.
Oh my God, yeah. We'll get.
There but anyway yeah like it's just fucking the other like well
there's two other big sins. Hi buddy how you doing one it

(08:19):
just doesn't justify its existence like it doesn't it it
does tries to do things different from the original, but
it feels like it's just checkingboxes off of the original
instead of making a story that like is in the vein of the
original. It's just like, OK, we have this
character named Nancy. You know, this character is the
name, you know, for this character.

(08:41):
OK, we did this. We did this.
Like this scene kind of resembles this scene in the
original. OK, we did this and it's just
it, it's just there's just nothing to this fucking movie.
It's just there's just nothing satisfying about it.
You. Know what?
It really does feel like? A list.
It's like a list of check boxes that they were just trying to

(09:01):
hit. Yeah, like.
Yeah, super disappointing, man. Exactly, Thor.
Like, you know, OK, you're goingto change Freddy's story.
All right, cool. I'm, I'm down with that.
You know, like you got to make it a little more intense so you
know what will make him a child molest or instead of a child
killer? That's the other mistake I think

(09:22):
this movie made. Yeah, like that's a, that's a
darker turn. We'll go back to that though.
Yeah, yeah. That's a darker turn, but I
don't think it justifies itself for the movie because, like, the
original Freddy Krueger is like the boogeyman.
Like, he's killing kids and nobody knew who he was until
they found him. So like, OK, that makes sense

(09:46):
because he's this monster boogeyman and then he enters
your dreams later because, you know, like he was, he was a
monster in real life and he becomes monster now in this when
he's a child molester. And it like he comes through in
their dreams because they're basically like giving him power

(10:09):
through reliving the the trauma is a is a good way to tell the
same story, but it just like it falls flat.
Yeah, 'cause they don't give it enough.
Like they don't give it enough attention I don't think.
Yeah, but I like, by making him explicitly a child molester,

(10:29):
though, I think like it takes the creepiness factor like from
like, you know, from like fantastical creepiness to like
real life achiness. Yeah, Yeah.
And it's just like, yeah. Like, you know, like where is
in, like, you know, in the original, like it was always
implied that, you know, you know, there's a child murderer.

(10:50):
Like, but we know, I think. I think the original kind of
storyline they were going to go with was like a child molester.
Yeah, they decided to dial it back.
What justifies the clause in this one?
I don't think they ever do. It doesn't because he's not a
child killer, he's a child molester.
Why does he have a glove then? Yeah, yeah.
I never thought about that. Like you see like the the

(11:13):
remnants of the glove in the in the basement, like they were,
they were looking through shit and they were finding like the
finger pieces. Yeah, but like, explain.
Like, why was he making that then?
Yeah. Was he going to move on to
killing? The kids, like, it's just
frustrating. But yeah, like I just say for
me, like I just coming back to like everything he was saying
and like, it was just like, gross.

(11:37):
So I think, 'cause that takes the line like I'm your boyfriend
now, from being like cheeky creepy to being like, oh, that's
fucking gross now. Yeah, where she like, there's
one part where she says like, fuck you to him and he's like,
that sounds good. Like like, like, yeah, no.
And it's not the good uncomfortable.

(11:58):
You. Know, like there's, there's a
line. Nancy had the claw marks on her
back. Yeah.
But like, tell us like, you know, because any human can make
claw marks with their fucking nails.
Yeah. It's just, it's just a big yeah.

(12:19):
It's a, it's a pile of check boxes.
Yeah. We did this.
We did. This iconic kill, we'll have
those, you know, like 'cause they hit the the one girl being
thrown around the room and then the one boyfriend being blamed
for it. Yeah.
Check. Nancy in the bathtub with the
fingers coming up. Nancy.

(12:40):
In the bathtub? Check.
That same girl who got killed first being dragged in the body
bag in the school? Check.
The dumb ending with the mom getting killed for no reason
check. Check.
But yeah, that's just to set up a sequel.
Yeah. Which which thankfully this
didn't get. Well, that's because everyone
hated it, but it was it was likeokayed for sequels.

(13:03):
God. And then when they tried it,
they like reference the Glenn murder in the first one, you
know, with all the fucking bloodexploding out of the bed, with
her coming down out of the ceiling with like the the flow
of blood that looked atrocious. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

(13:26):
I don't, I don't, I don't like discredit him for like.
No, Jackie Earl Haley did a really good job at this
character. Like he did the most he could
with it, yeah. You just can't Polish a turd
like fucking. It's just, you know, they again,
they're just checking boxes. They're not worrying about

(13:47):
writing a fucking compelling story.
Yeah. And that's a big part of the
original. Like you had a a good story and
you had the creepy and you had the scares.
Like this is just going for the creepy and the scares.
Yeah. And it also has that same look
of like, Texas Chainsaw Massacre, where everything has
like, a green filter and like, everything is like, you know,

(14:09):
dripping water and fucking just sticky looking.
Yeah, it's just the era. Yeah.
I I, I do like some of the shot setups.
I like some of the transitions, like when I forget what where
she is exactly, but the whole, yeah, the whole the whole the

(14:31):
whole scenery like twists into the the basement or the the
boiler room like that looked good.
Like it sucks, man, because they're like, there's there is
real potential in this movie. It's just they didn't.
They didn't. Find it.
They didn't do it. Like, this opening scene in the
diner is actually really fuckinggood.
Like, they set it up like everything starts great and it's

(14:54):
just downhill from there. Yeah, I like that they kept some
of the original music because itit just like super iconic.
Yeah, that's I mean, that's likeif they did the Candyman sequels
and didn't have, you know, like Helen's theme or whatever.
Like it's got to be in there. I'm.
Trying to think of like, anotherthing I can say good about this.

(15:14):
I really can't say much good about it, honestly.
No, it's just not like there's good actors in it.
Like they're just not. Everything's just not clicking.
It's just fucking. Absolute waste of Clancy Brown.
Yeah, yeah, Clancy Brown is in this movie like I, I like I did
the research about 1/2 hour ago and quite frankly forgot he was

(15:35):
in this movie until you just said it right now.
And. He's got what, like 2 minutes of
screen time? Yeah, why?
Why? Why go for like that big of a
name for that small of a part like yeah.
Yeah, and you know, like I do like the idea of like the micro,

(16:02):
the micro naps that they wind uphaving like the micro dreams,
you know, that's like that's thefun thing that you can do.
Like, you know, there's been a lot more sleep research done,
introduce new things that into the like the fold of the
nightmare movies that works cool.
Like that's cool. There's little blips of Freddie

(16:24):
doing a thing, not just like a full on dream.
I like it. It's fun and it's interesting.
Yeah, like the, the like, some of the cool things are like
towards the end when, like, Nancy is like running away from
him and she runs under the red carpet and then, like, it slowly
just turns to liquid underneath her.
I thought that was a fucking cool scene, too.
Like. Yeah, but then they just didn't.
They don't build anything cool around like one or two cool

(16:47):
scenes. And then, like, I was going to
say, this is like a post, like Inception world, like a good way
to justify your movie about like, you know, shit, people
being killed in dreams. Like have big trippy fucking
dream sequences. Like where you're having these

(17:07):
big fights with Freddie instead of just like these shitty.
Like most of them don't even look good.
Like you have like the Katie Cassidy one where he's like,
she's in school and she's like, oh, wait, I'm dreaming.
And then looks like poof, everybody disappears.
And then like, yeah, it's just, I don't know, it's just stupid.
Like you could have done so muchmore with this.
They did. They did better in the later
nightmare movies like. Yeah.

(17:29):
You know, like, obviously they got goofy, but they were
creative. You know, like they're, they're
fucking huge and imaginative. You know, like a fucking video
game fight with him was great. You know, like people pretending
to be rock stars because that's their dream.
Yeah, like a kid being a superhero.
I think in like 4 or five, yeah.Yeah, then there was the like

(17:52):
the wizard character from. Dream warrior.
Dream warrior, Yeah. Man.
There's a bunch of stuff they cut out too.
I imagine. Was that the good stuff?
What I you know, a, a thing, it's like a, it's like a double
edged sword. This movie moves really fast.

(18:15):
I will say that it is brief, thankfully.
Like I don't know what the actual time on it is, but it.
It it's $1.35 S probably like $1.27 without the without the
credits. Yeah, dude.
Like it flew by, like it didn't feel at all like that.
And I think that's to its detriment.
These everything is just so fast-paced and like it's like

(18:36):
one thing jumps to another, jumps to another, jumps to
another. Yeah, there's no depth to
anything like. Yeah, nothing marinates like
it's, it's just, it's just goingby too fast.
Oh. First time shatter.
Oh, welcome. Yeah, there.
We didn't really get too many classic Freddy lines.

(18:57):
The two the the two classic lines that are like the quotable
lines from this are just taken from other movies.
Yeah, I'm. Again, checking a box like.
I'm your boyfriend now and talk about a wet dream.
Those are two. Yeah, yeah, I didn't even pick
up on that second one. Yep.

(19:20):
Yeah, but it's just, I'm just, I'm just sad, really like.
Of what we just missed the shitty CGI wall scene.
Frighteners did it better. Yeah, Yeah, actually,
Frighteners. Frighteners did it just about
the. Same.
The fucking video cassette box of the Frighteners did it better
than they did in this movie because it was one of those

(19:43):
lenticular motion things. Awesome.
Oh man. I just, I I didn't want to see
this when it first came out. Yeah, it was just one of those
and I know this is going to suck.
Like I haven't like this was thefirst time I've seen it hydrate.

(20:05):
Oh, don't mind if I do. So this was the first time I've
seen it and. Oh, really?
I'm I I'm glad I didn't see it when it first came out.
Oh yeah, yeah. OK so I saw this is the drive in
and like I think I was ready to fucking leave like halfway
through for DJI. Yeah, because I would have been

(20:34):
watching this for like, my entertainment and I would have
been trying to get, like, my money's worth out of this movie.
And I'm really glad that like the first time I have to watch
this, I have to watch it to be critical and not really think
about like, am I having a good time watching this?

(20:55):
Because I I really like. I wasn't, but I wasn't having a
bad time. But you weren't having a good
time either, probably. I'm going to say no.
There's that also barely came into play in this too.
The whole like nursery rhyme thing.
It was in it. Yeah, and they again checked the
box. When they were like flashing
back to the the nursery school or what?

(21:15):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like this is just so.
Fucking soulless is what it is. Like, yeah.
Really, that's what it is. There's there's no like personal
like the person making it clearly doesn't have a personal
love like driving them to make the movie.
It's just like we have the rights.
Let's just fake some, you know, fucking make some money on.
It it's another Michael Bay joint.

(21:36):
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it isn't like you're
right. He produced it like Texas
Chainsaw Massacre. Yeah.
But he did. He did Friday the 13th, didn't
he? The remake of that I think he
produced. That one, I think you're right.
Yeah. Mr. Krab's impressions, the
whole. Time I can confirm that she was.
Yeah, who knows? I'll be.

(21:59):
Pretty. Yeah, like this is just.
It's just soulless shit from theera of soulless shit.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is peak like 2000s era, like
horror movies basically. Like, you know, it's like, you
see, it's shiny fucking and it'sjust bad.

(22:22):
Yeah. Yeah.
All right. Yeah, I was just like, I just
really just fucking disappointedwith the whole thing, you know?
Like I was watching it and I wastrying to be open minded, right?
Because like it, it's got some good actors in it.
It's got, you know, like it's got Freddy fucking Krueger in

(22:49):
it, right? Like it's got to be a certain
level of something. It just, it isn't, I think, and
I don't want to say it's like because they changed too much
about it, because I'm open to that's changing the thing.
Change enough for any reason like it's just they they, it
goes back to they were just OK, we got to do this we got to do
this we got to do this. Yep, yeah, let's throw some

(23:13):
ratings on this and then start moving on because like, this is
just painful. All right, So what is the
qualifier for rewatch ability? Like I won't, no, I know the
number, but like is it I will not choose to put this on or
it's like I will not watch this no matter what because if this

(23:34):
was on and like somebody turned this on, I'm not.
I will say yeah, I will say 5 is, I will.
I'll not choose to watch it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
OK. Then this is a four.
Yeah, yeah. I don't want to go down to.
I was thinking like 3-5, but that puts it in like really,
really bad. Yeah.
And it's not really, really bad.It's just not really good or

(23:58):
good. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's just bland and just, again,soulless.
Like there's just no reason for this to exist.
Like it's just yeah, yeah. It's just frustrating.
So yeah, I think I'm going to go.
I think I'm going to go 4 as well, just like.
I'm a firm believer that you don't remake good movies, right?

(24:21):
Like you remake movies that had the potential to be really,
really good. And they like either didn't have
the funding or the technology orthe, yeah, whatever.
You know, Like you remake a movie that was like almost
there, and then you improve on it.
You don't take a classic that everyone loves that nobody has a

(24:41):
problem with and just throw modern shit.
On you shit up for the kids these days, yeah.
Fuck you. It's just garbage, man.
Like, yeah. No.
Yeah, Sam makes a good point. If the notion of watching it
again ever crosses your mind forany reason, it has met the
minimum threshold for rewatch ability.
That is true, yeah. It's very scientific.

(25:03):
Yeah, if you ever go like, maybeI'll check that movie out again.
But I wouldn't. No, no.
Yeah, I wouldn't though, like ifsomebody like again, if it was
on like, you know, again, we're watching horror movies in a
group or something like I, I, you know, I wouldn't say like,
oh, we got to turn this off. I would just say like, this
fucking blows. And if somebody says, oh, I want
to see it, like, OK, like you'vebeen warned.

(25:25):
It's, it's watchable. It's it's it is watchable.
But like, I can't imagine somebody, a, thinking this is
ever going to be better than theoriginal.
Yeah. Or B like exciting enough to
want to see again. Like nobody's ever going to say,
man. Like this is my favorite horror

(25:46):
movie. Like, I don't think there's
anybody who can say that. No.
And I, I have to, I have to point out one thing.
That wasn't Jackie Earl Haley. What he does when he's Freddie,
like he's got that menace to him, which is like he has to

(26:08):
have it. But then he does that like tick
thing where he, like, scrapes the knives together.
Yeah, I like that a lot 'cause that's something like Freddie
like maybe did once or twice, you know, like as as like a
joke. He does it as like a tick.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The other thing they never
justify is the hat. Like they show him wearing it

(26:30):
like, for like a second when they first introduced him as a
gardener. Yeah.
And then like for the rest of the time when you see him, he's
never wearing that hat. Like when he's he gets killed,
he's not wearing that hat, Right?
So like why the fuck does he come back with the hat?
Yeah, I mean, he wasn't killed with the glove either, but.
Came back with the glove, yeah. But Freddie wasn't even like the

(26:52):
original. Freddie wasn't even killed with
the glove on. I don't know, it's just like a
part of his persona that he brought back with him.
I think it was another like wasted opportunity too.
If you want to make it like different from the original,
have something like more in depth with like the parents.
Maybe like there's like a fucking group of like witches or
something who cursed like Freddie, like as they're killing

(27:13):
him and that's why he fucking comes back.
Like they banish him but it onlylike, you know, it sends him to
the dream world instead of killing him.
Like do something like that. Like make it a little fucking
different. That's spicy.
But I don't think that's like, Idon't know, that doesn't quite
work. For me, don't base the whole
movie on it, but. Like, see you spitball on the
idea. Like throw it in there if you

(27:35):
want to make it different in some way.
I think if he was really innocent, it would have been a
bold twist. Yeah, yeah.
'Cause there was that question for like 5 minutes or so, Like
is this something that the kids made-up or like, did this really
happen? Yeah.
And did they answer the questionimmediately?
Yeah. Let it linger, Yeah.
Marinate like. Like have that be a reveal at

(27:57):
the end like. This and like this drives me
crazy and I'm going to sound like a fucking super old
crotchety man surprise surprise,this movie was made for people
who don't have attention spans. This was made for the 2010 crowd
of people who just wanted hostile.

(28:19):
They wanted like, I don't want to think about my movie I.
Just give me good looking peopleand then like a kill every so
often to keep me interested. That's what this is.
This is paint by numbers. IPad kids, Yeah.
Yeah. But yeah, I think like, having
him be innocent, that would havebeen the way to justify this

(28:39):
movie movie's existence, like. Because now it's a revenge.
Yeah, yeah. Like it's a justified revenge.
Not just I'm mad because I got caught because I was fucking
your kids. No, yeah, your kids accused me
of fucking them and I didn't like, Yeah, like that be the
fucking thing. Make this interesting in any
way. Yeah.

(29:01):
And then you can go on, like, bring the parents in, and now
they're like, Oh my God, did we kill an innocent man?
Like, yeah, it doesn't have to just be the teenagers.
Like, like explore the space, man Fucking yeah All right.

(29:23):
Oh hey, we have a a button for. This Yeah, Let's do trivia.
Let's do some trivia. Instead of just ranting about
how bad this movie is. Because we can keep doing that.
It's pretty fucking bad. Yeah.
You know what? I'm going to turn this light
down. Is this thing still as low as it

(29:47):
goes? Is overhead.
It's not like 30%. Yeah, I can bring it down.
Yeah, See what happens. Just play with the space.
Again, explore the space. Yeah, here we go.
Do your thing. Yeah, All right.
Freddy's sweater was knitted by Judy Graham, the same woman who

(30:10):
knitted Freddy's sweater in the original Nightmare on the
Street. All right, so that's fun.
Kyle Gallner suffered a cut to his abdomen when the glove
Jackie Earl Haley had been wearing failed to bend back
down, leaving one of the knives still extended.
Haley didn't realize this until the scene was finished.

(30:31):
Damn, that sucks. Yeah.
Also, why are why are they sharp?
Yeah, Yeah, exactly. Oh, pardon me.
Yeah, it's a little darker. We're at 2929%.
We're at 35. That's fine.
The Freddy gloves were the most protected prop on the set.

(30:53):
Previous films had issues with the gloves being stolen.
Most notorious was a glove that was stolen from one of the films
and appeared in Evil Dead 2 hanging in a shed.
The script certainly wasn't the most protected fucking thing on
the set, that's for sure. Yeah, you know, I didn't know
that that that glove in Evil Dead 2 was a real 1.

(31:13):
I thought it was. That is pretty crazy, I thought.
It was just like a replica, yeah.
That is a real fuck you though. Yeah, well, they had a, they had
a like a like a fun rivalry going because like, who was it
in Evil Dead One? There was a Hills Have Eyes.
All right, Yeah. And then in Nightmare on Elm

(31:37):
Street, I think they were watching Evil Dead.
And then Evil Dead 2. They have the glove.
Like, all right, what kind of shit?
Heather Langenkamp, who played Nancy in Nightmare on the
Streets from 1984, was offered acameo but declined.
She would have played the waitress in the opening diner

(31:58):
scene. Yeah, good call, Heather.
Yeah, yeah 'cause it's like, canwe have your blessing like.
No, again, they would have just been checking a box.
Yeah, well, here's another one. Robert England gave his personal
blessing to Jackie Earl Haley toreplace him as Freddie, saying
the torch has been well past. Yeah, he's not the problem.
Yeah, like he's a good actor. Yeah.

(32:20):
What he had to work with, on theother hand, not so much.
Wasn't so good. No Rooney Mara hated being in
this movie so much that she almost quit acting.
Yeah, she would have been just fine if she quit acting.
If you knew anything about the the Rooney Mara family.
Her, I forget what her real name, I think her real name is

(32:41):
like Patricia or something, but she changed her name to Rooney
Mara because her mother's maidenname is Rooney.
As in like Rooneys who own the Pittsburgh Steelers, I think,
and then the Mara's, as in the Mara's who own the New York
Giants. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
She'll be fine. Just just.
Swell. Yeah, yeah.

(33:05):
Let's see here. The school board president of
one of the two high schools in the movie was filming at allowed
the movie to be filmed there under the condition that no
death scenes were being filmed inside of the school.
OK. I I I guess what does it matter?

(33:26):
Yeah, sure. Yeah, but anyway, after the
film's financial success, the studio greenlit production on a
sequel, and Jackie Earl Haley began discussions regarding his
salary and possible storylines. However, the massive critical
and fan backlash brought the plans to an end.

(33:48):
Finally, bitching gets things done.
Yeah, like this. This had a huge box office
front. Did it?
Really? It did because everybody was so
excited because it had been. Yeah, Nightmare on Elm Street.
When yeah, 1 was the last. New Nightmare was probably the
last Nightmare was, you know, Freddy versus Jason.
Yeah, but then Freddy versus Jason was what, 2000 and 345?

(34:13):
4 maybe? Something like that.
Let's see, I'm. Just thinking about the
soundtrack and I'm like, this islike single digit 2000s.
I mean, Jay and Silent Bob are in it, so they it's got to be
early 2000s. Yeah, I'm going to say 2003.

(34:35):
2003 that was off. But yeah, like, because it yeah.
Movie's 22 years old. Shut.
Shut your fucking mouth. Shut your fucking mouth.
This movie is 15 years old, which, by the way, I hate.
I hated. TJ coming through.

(35:01):
I hated Freddy versus Jason. That was also not good, yeah.
For the same a lot of the same reasons.
Yeah, it was soulless and just. Glitzy and cash in.
Yeah, yeah. So like this made a lot of money
because people were like, let's watch a Freddy Krueger movie.

(35:22):
Like everybody was like chompingon the bit person Freddy and
they got this. You feed us this dog shit.
To quote welfare. To paraphrase welfare.
I got a belly full of white dogs.
You drop this shit on me? Let's see, when the prop

(35:42):
department designed the glove, they built dozens of models,
some of which had claws on all 5fingers, which is not new.
They did that in New Nightmare. That's right.
Yeah. Yeah.
I hated it, yeah, fucking hated it.
But it kind of made sense in that because that Freddie is

(36:03):
like a demon, so he doesn't really need like, dexterity in
that hand to be able to grab shit.
Yeah. He just sprouts him out of his
hand. He.
Just needs to kill you with it. Yeah, Billy Bob Thornton and
Steve Buscemi were considered toplay Freddy Krueger, and either
one of those is fucking awful for this.
Yeah, definitely Steve Buscemi, Billy Bob Thornton, like maybe

(36:25):
could have pulled it on I. Don't think so.
I don't think so. Yeah, we're talking about the
Dude in 2010. This is the Dude playing Bad
Santa at this point. Yeah, yeah.
It would have been just been like, yeah, drunk Freddy,
basically, like, yeah. Let's see.

(36:47):
Yeah, this had the largest theatrical release of any film
in the Nightmare series, playingat about 4700 screens.
That's a lot. So I saw this at the drive in.
Adjusted for inflation, the original Nightmare on Elm Street
would have cost $2.3 million to make in 2010 and grossed 119

(37:11):
million in the in the 20 tens. The remake had a budget of about
35 million and made $116 million.
So the original would have been cheaper and made more money.
You know why 'cause it's such a better movie.
Yeah, yeah, like why? Playing studio executive here.
Why wouldn't you fucking throw alittle bit more at the things

(37:36):
that count for this, like the script?
Hire a fucking solid writer who's going to deliver on it
like and not just a fucking oh this make it look like a cash
grab. So there were, and this was a, a
piece of trivia that I actually left out, but there were at one
point like 15 scripts for this. And what you wind up with is

(37:56):
like an amalgamation of four of them, which like, I don't think
that's what's typical, terribly unusual, like combined scripts,
but like just start with 15 and whittle it down to 4.
And then mix. Mix them together for a fucking
slasher movie. Yeah.

(38:17):
It's just not OK. But that's it for that's it for
trivia. All right, You want to do some
one star reviews? Oh, that's right.
Yeah, yeah, you can bet your assor.
Something like this? There got to be tons of these.
There were, there were a lot. All right, I have to make a
fucking intro for this segment, but yeah.

(38:39):
We'll work on it. We'll work.
On it. This one is entitled Jump Scare
on Lame Street. I figured this would be an
entertaining remake if nothing else.
I was wrong. Dead wrong.
There was a there was much richer mysterious element to the
original film and to my surprise, much more creative.
I thought the kills and nightmare sequences would be

(39:01):
vastly approved upon, but alas, gigabytes, green screens and CGI
cannot compete with hands on creativity.
No argument. Yeah, no argument.
Yeah, 100% agree. Yeah.
It's like this is fucking vanilla.
CW version. Yeah, that's exactly what this
is. Let's see, this one here is

(39:24):
entitled An Atrocious Mess. Once again, Platinum Dunes have
raped another classic film in the name of the almighty dollar.
All I can say is that they should be apologizing to the
fans for this unbearable piece of crap.
Stand by that one also, yeah. Yeah, you will love the title on
this one. Michael Bay molested me.

(39:50):
I only saw this movie because itwas showing in the drive in and
I went with friends. All of us moaned and fidgeted.
It was horrible, horrible film. Yeah, I'm trying to remember
what they This was the second movie, so I wonder what 2000?
10. Yeah, it would have probably
been like this wouldn't have been opening night if this was
the second movie. Oh Jesus Christ, like 2010.

(40:11):
Probably like another horror. Movie, probably, yeah, like a.
Seed of Chucky, maybe? Maybe.
Was it Wrath of the Titans? That is a shit show of a double
feature. Wrath wasn't very good, but it
was better than this. Yeah, yeah.

(40:35):
I don't know what would have been the first movie ahead of
this. I'm sure somebody can Google it.
Shy of proofs. Autobiography.
Jesus Christ. The Crispy Muppet Show, 2010.

(40:59):
I used that meme picture of Jackie Earl Haley for the post
for this on Instagram. Oh really?
Yeah. Yeah, the Freddy we have at
home. It's a travesty the disgustingly
brilliant franchise Kitty killerand nightmare slasher that is
Freddy Krueger has been resurrected as a rubbish sock
face. A melted GIMP, A burnt puppet.

(41:26):
Yeah, this guy's real mad. And this is going to be our last
one star review. Who's going to kill Michael Bay
already? As you can see by reading any of
the other reviews for A Nightmare on Elm Street from
2010, it was a horrible film. The issue that nobody's

(41:47):
addressed, however, is that there's no way that this could
possibly be good. The deck was stacked against it
from the beginning. Yeah, that's it in a nutshell.
Valid argument. Yeah, like there's no way for
this to be better. So then there's no point unless
you're going to take it a completely different route,

(42:08):
which they didn't do, and just like make something as good.
It's like Frank Sinatra and Frank Sinatra Junior.
There's no way you're going to be better than Frank Sinatra,
no. Jesus Christ, Now, yeah, don't
do the same stuff if you're Frank Sinatra.
Junior, Yeah. Make rock music.

(42:29):
Yeah, take up farming, fucking do anything other than be a
crooner. That's it.
All right, we will move on to the better known as.

(42:51):
I feel like we are going to blowright through this segment.
This is just like not a whole lot going.
We will start off with Samuel Bayer, who is the director of
this. There's a reason why this feels
like it was directed for people with the short attention spans.
These mother fuckers made a lot of music videos.
Oh, really? This dude directed my like teens

(43:15):
and 20s. I honestly did not even realize
it. I wonder if that's why Michael
Bay hooked up with him 'cause like that's where Michael Bay
started, wasn't. It I probably, Yeah.
I this honestly might be his only, like, feature movie.
We'll go over some of the peoplehe's done videos for Pearl Jam,

(43:35):
The Offspring, Mud Crutch. He's done a lot of videos for
Garbage. He did a Michael Jackson video,
My Chemical Romance, Green Day. He pretty much directed all of
the videos on American Idiot. Maroon 5 directed a video called

(43:58):
Absolute Garbage. I realize it's about the band,
but it's very much about this movie.
Also Justin Timberlake Pink, he directed from Welcome to the
Black Parade. He directed Welcome to the Black
Parade and Famous Last Words, hedirected Bullet in the Bible
from Green Day Blink 182 Stay together for the Kids.

(44:20):
He directed that video. He directed the video for Jesus
of Suburbia. Wake Me up when September ends.
Holiday Blvd. of Broken Dreams. American Idiot.
He did a couple of Sheryl Crow videos.
Good Charlotte, Pat Benatar, TheCranberries.

(44:41):
We'll, we'll, we'll get to some of the cranberries.
Well, we'll, he did the big one.He did Zombie.
Yeah. He directed a couple of videos
for Bowie, Papa Roach, Lenny Kravitz.
He directed for The Smashing Pumpkins Bullet with butterfly
wings. He directed an Aerosmith video.
Poison directed a bunch of Marilyn Manson videos, Robbie

(45:07):
Williams, Marilyn Manson, Coma White and Rock is Dead from
Mechanical Animals which is the only good Marilyn Manson album
in my opinion. That I mean, you're allowed to
have that opinion, but you are mistaken.
Everlast, The Rolling Stones, John Mellencamp, LL Cool J when

(45:34):
it comes to garbage. He did vow.
Stupid girl Only happy when it rains.
He did Until it Sleeps for Metallica.
Got to get away for The Offspring.
He did a video for Bad Brains. He did a couple of videos for
Tesla. The band, not the fucking evil
company. Tesla was a great fucking band,

(45:55):
I don't give a shit. The the He did the video for
doll parts for Hole towed the wet sprocket fall down
Collective Soul Iron Maiden. He did the video for you for
Candlebox did a video for rush more Pat Benatar, Melissa

(46:17):
Etheridge Iron Maiden again IronMaiden again a Tesla again
directed the video for poison heart for the Ramones.
Hell yeah. He directed the no rain video
for Blind Melon. There's literally nobody in our
generation who has not seen thatmusic video.
A million times. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, it gets bigger too, trust me.

(46:38):
Jesus and Mary Chain. He did direct.
He directed Mama I'm coming Homefor Ozzy Osbourne.
He directed Smells like Teen Spirit for Nirvana.
Wow. Yeah, fucking and the biggest 1
yet, Richie Sambora. But yeah, I mean, like if he

(46:59):
just directed like Smells Like Teen Spirit and I was the other
like the zombie in No Rain. Like that's the video Hall of
Fame right there. Yeah, but yeah.
We're apparently frozen, but if you.
Oh shit. Yeah, hold on.
I am frozen. It's not frozen on mine though.
It is on mine. I do not know what that is

(47:24):
about. I don't know.
Yeah. If you come back, we're live
again. We're going to keep going on.
All I can say is if you're frozen, refresh.
We're going to move on. Up next, Jackie Earle Haley,
who, again, didn't do a bad job as Freddie.

(47:44):
He just did not get a great, youknow, script to work with.
Yeah, he is probably most well known as being Kelly from the
first 3 Bad News Bears movies. He's most well known for being
Rorschach. Oh yeah.
Oh yeah. For our audience, probably yeah.

(48:07):
Fucking. I mean, that was bad.
News Bears is huge though. Like, well, yeah, no, like I I
love bad news. Bears.
Yeah he is Rorschach in the Watchmen movie.
He shows up in a lot of shit. Not much known shit lately to be
quite frank. Last real like known movie he
was in was the lead of Battle Angel.

(48:28):
That was 2019. Cobain was number one with a
bullet anyway, using 2 episodes of Narcos Mexico.
He was the terror in the Amazon reboot of The Tick, which is
actually really fucking good. Yeah, he was in that awesome

(48:50):
version of The Dark Tower. That didn't exist.
That never came out. I never watched that.
That was. He was in the first season only,
I believe, of Preacher. I I loved that comic book.
Yeah. And then when that show came
out, I was so excited and so letdown.

(49:11):
The first season was good. That's.
It Yeah, first season. That's you should probably stop
after that once they get to New Orleans.
That show fucking just dies likestory wise and never recovers.
I was just fucking shit. Yeah, he was in the RoboCop
reboot that everybody forgets existed because it's not good.

(49:34):
He was in Lincoln. He was a human target, which I
fucking loved that show. And it was gone after like a
season, I believe. Really.
It was based on the DC comic. He was in Shutter Island.
Semi pro. Yes, semi pro.
He's like the like the one fan of the basketball team.

(49:57):
You ever been punched in the jejunum?
He's in Maniac Cop 3, Badge of Silence, Doll Man.
It's in the greatest TV series ever, Renegade.
Hell yeah. He was an episode of that show
Get a Life with Chris Elliott. You ever see that show?
I don't think so. It is so bizarre and hilarious.

(50:19):
Like it's, it's really surreal. Chris Elliott's just a weird
dude. Yeah, yeah, the one joke I
remember that always like stuck with me.
Like there was 1 episode where like he's like, he's got like a
piece of wood and he's like whittling it down for the whole
episode. And he was like, what are you
making? He's like I'm, you know, making
myself a bow. Like at the end of the episode

(50:40):
he's got this fucking like full on like compound fucking bow
like so dumb. Oh shit.
He was in Murder, She Wrote. I honestly missed that on my go

(51:01):
through on the research. Oh.
God damn. That was in 1986.
That was like season 2 Murder She Wrote.
Maybe season 3. He was an episode of the
original MacGyver in 1985. That might be the oh this man
has been on the fuck boat not once, but twice.

(51:22):
And then, of course, the Bad News Bears movies.
Kelly was the one that the like the older kid on the dirt bike.
Yeah, he, like, smoked. Yeah.
Yeah. He was in the Planet of the Apes
TV series for an episode. And that's it.
We'll move on from there. His first roles in the Carol
Carol Burnett Show, 1972. Up next, Rooney Mara, again of

(51:48):
the football Rooneys and Mara's.She's been in some movies.
I'm not going to lie. She's pretty fucking like
vanilla. Like I like, she's just like,
very forgettable, like, in my opinion.
Yeah, she's in something upcoming called Bucking
Festered. Sure, she was a nightmare alley

(52:14):
in 2021. I honestly do not remember her
in that movie, but I've only seen that like once.
Yeah. That's enough.
That's enough. Yeah, I mean, like, I should
probably go back for it because I I like, I didn't love it the
first time I watched it. I don't know if I gave it a fair
shake or if it was one of those like, oh, this is a little

(52:35):
boring, where's my phone kind ofmovies.
I liked it, it just wasn't like,didn't scratch the Del Toro
itch, you know? Yeah.
I think that's a lot of what it was, Yeah, yeah.
She was a voice in Kubo and the Two Strings, which is pretty
good. I like that movie.
It was like an anime. Yeah, yeah, I did enjoy that.

(53:00):
Let's see Girl with the Dragon Tattoo.
It's probably what she's most known for.
I did not enjoy that movie. I was bored as fuck.
Were. You.
Yeah, She's in the social network also.
It was also 2010. I think that's it for the
notable stuff. She's in two episodes of ER.

(53:21):
Nah. Youth and revolt was I.
Honestly don't remember that. Where did?
Where was that? Right there.
Oh right there. I keep going up and down Law and
Order SVU. Her first role was in a a sequel
to Urban Legends, which was justa RIP off of Scream.
Gross. Yeah.

(53:41):
Up next, Kyle Gallner, who was just in a fairly popular horror
movie last year. I didn't even realize he is in
Strange Darling. He is one of the two main
characters in that movie. Is that the one with the?
Like the IT tells the story out of order.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I. I still haven't seen it but.

(54:03):
I got the I, I I knew the twist like pretty quickly.
Yeah. Oh, he's in Smile.
Yeah, he's in Smile and smile too.
The first smile was OK. I liked the second one a lot
better. Really.
Yeah. Yeah.
The the first one was just like,meh.
The second one was a lot more interesting.
I thought. OK, yeah, both of those.

(54:26):
Smile too. Was 2024.
Strange Darling was 2023. Stop.
Stop burping. Well, my bad, my bad.
I'm hydrated, I'm hydrated. He was also in the Scream reboot
in 2022. Is it a reboot?

(54:49):
It was a continuation, but it was a reboot.
It wasn't a remake. It's a reboot of the franchise.
Get the fuck out of here with that shit.
He was a voice in Far Cry 5. It might be it.
As far as the notable shit, it was an episode of The Walking
Dead. Criminal Minds.

(55:10):
Hold, please. Go up.
Up, up, up, up. He played.
He played Lou. Reed in the CBG movie.
Is that the one with Alan? Rickman.
I believe I heard it was just like schmaltzy bullshit so I
never watched it. Oh dude, no, it's so fucking
good. Is it really?

(55:31):
It's so fun. Yeah.
All right. No, definitely, definitely watch
that movie. I remember I wanted to go there
like when it before it closed and convincing a bunch of
suburban kids to go to fucking Manhattan was not an easy chore
and I did not get to go. That's yeah.

(55:55):
He played Bart Allen in 4 episodes of Smallville.
He played the character Impulse.It was Jennifer's Body in 2009,
which I've been meaning to revisit.
I haven't seen it since it firstcame out.
I yeah, it looked really dumb when it came out.
It seems to have gotten a lot ofmore appreciation over.
There, Yeah, it's becoming kind of a cult hit, so I'm going to.

(56:19):
I never saw it because it lookedlike shit.
There's not much here. We're going to He's a Wet Hot
American Summer in 2001, the original movie, which is really
hilarious. Moving on, Katie Cassidy is up

(56:42):
next. She is probably most well known
for playing Black Canary on Arrow and like the related shows
there. Oh yeah.
Other than that, no. I think I want to say she was in
something else, like notable 12 episodes of Gossip Girl, 18

(57:05):
episodes of Melrose Place. That's got to be a reboot. 2000
and nine, 2010. That nobody asked for. 6
episodes. When they redid 90210 it's like
no, what are you doing? Nobody wanted it, nobody wants
that. 6 episodes of Supernatural.
She was in the Black Christmas remake in 2006.

(57:27):
I did hear that was pretty good.Yeah, we'll get around to that
someday when we need to do a slasher because we're running
out of monster movies. Shut your mouth.
Yeah, she was in the Adam Sandler movie.
Click 4 episodes of 7th Heaven. She was in the Eminem music
video for Just Lose It 2004. We're going to move on.

(57:50):
Thomas Decker is up next. This dude I did not realize was
John Connor in the Terminator Chronicles TV show.
No, TJI did not say that Smallville was a cult hit.
I said that Jennifer's Body has become a cult hit.

(58:14):
Fantastic Allison Mack joke. Oh man.
Nexium. Headquarters is like a it's
between here and the Heritage. So yeah, yeah, very close that
that building is still empty. Yeah.
Yeah, I can't imagine why. Because people got branded in

(58:35):
it. It's probably because of the sex
crimes. I'm going to say yeah, he was in
Star Trek Picard, which I gave up on like halfway through
season 2. Season 1 was so good.
And season 2 was garbage. It just became a like a greatest
hits. Yeah, I even tried watching the

(58:56):
first couple of episodes of Season 3 was like, all right,
they're getting the band back together.
Yeah, I don't care. Yeah, other than that's, what
have we got? Nothing.
Crap, crap, crap. No, that wire is moving macabre.

(59:19):
Yeah, she was doing that in 2011, all right.
I usually did one season of that.
I mentioned the Terminator Chronicles.
Could not get into that at all. Whore, 2008.
Rude, yeah, but OK. He was in 12 episodes of Heroes

(59:40):
too in 2006. And seven, I don't remember
that. Nothing's got a memorable face
or anything. Like I don't remember the
character of Zach either. So 9 episodes of 7th Heaven.
Also, here's a voice in two episodes of the Jackie Chan
Adventures. One episode of the Mummy

(01:00:02):
animated series. Land Before Time, Honey, I
Shrunk the Kids the TV series. A.
Couple of American tale movies. He's in three episodes of
Seinfeld. Extreme Ghostbusters, There's a
lot of voice work. Star Trek Voyager, he's in the

(01:00:22):
90s. Village of the Damned too.
And 95. He's in a lot of Star Trek shit.
Star Trek Voyager 2 episodes. Star Trek Generations as
Picard's Kid, 1994. I didn't know that the character
of Picard's kid didn't have a name.
His name's Picard's kid. Up next, Kellen Lutz, who is

(01:00:45):
most notable for being in the Twilight movies.
He is one of the sparkly vampires.
Other than that, he's been on that FBI show on CBS, one of the
spin offs. I've never seen it, but I'm sure
one of your grandparents has. What am I saying?

(01:01:07):
Did you watch Matlock this week?I didn't I.
Didn't it's the finale. Oh, was it I?
Believe so, yeah. It's been a long season it.
Was it was, it was good. I, I, I, I really hope they're
coming back for Season 2. He the other notable thing he
was notable in quotes we had theyear we had the dueling Hercules

(01:01:31):
movies. He was Hercules in the non rock
Hercules we just. Talked about that movie it keeps
probably else was in that was that last week.
Was it last week or maybe 2 weeks ago?
None of these people are ringingany bells, but.

(01:01:52):
Who would have been in it? Somebody was in this?
Yeah. Last week or the week before?
Somebody not in the top cast here, Soragavati.
I usually get that, but it's a little bit spicy sometimes.
I think we're done with this dude.
Was what's his name in it the fucking the guy that played

(01:02:14):
Leatherface? Was it him?
Maybe Andrew Brunarski? Yeah.
Who gives a shit? Really?
Who gives a shit? He was in that show, Generation
Kill on HBO, which is about likethe the second Iraq war, 6 Feet

(01:02:39):
Under, one episode of that. We're going to move on.
Yeah. Bye bye.
Up next, Clancy Brown, who we have talked before, but he's
just so fucking awesome that we have to mention that he's in
this movie. Oh, that's right.
He's in the one of The Expendables movies.
Yeah. Yeah, who gives a shit after the
second one, though? Yeah, Yeah, They're like one

(01:03:00):
awesome, great idea. Like super good two.
OK, make it a little bigger, bring in some of the side guys
that maybe you didn't have the budget for.
Yeah, a third one, huh? And then 4/4 was painful.
Yeah, you know what's not painful?
Watching most of everything thatClancy Brown is in.

(01:03:20):
Yeah, like The Shawshank Redemption, Starship Troopers,
Thor Ragnarok. He is Damien Dark Blood on the
Invincible series, who looks to be a major like character in the
next season. We're going to move on because
we've talked about him before, but he's the fucking Kurgan, you

(01:03:42):
know, Clancy Brown. Fucking.
Curd and last up we have Connie Britton.
She is also in a ton of stuff. You've seen her in probably at
least one thing here and there. As far as most notable, she was
in like the Friday Night Light series.

(01:04:04):
Maybe that. The first the first season of
American Horror Story. Yes, well, first season of
American Horror Story. She's the first season of White
Lotus American Horror Story. Yeah, 13 episodes of VATS.

(01:04:25):
She was in 98 episodes of Nashville on ABC.
So that's probably what she's most known as.
Christ. She's in the movie Professor
Marston and the Wonder Women she's about the creator of.
The kinky, kinky creator of Wonder Woman.
That dude, yeah. Yep, Now a woman who superpowers

(01:04:45):
is a rope and fucking. Ties men up.
Shackles. Yeah.
Yeah. I wonder what that's about.
Yeah, she was also on, Yeah, 76 episodes of Friday Night Lights.
She was on 100 episodes of Spin City on ABC.

(01:05:07):
Oh damn. Which was a really good show.
Was that Michael J Fox? Well, yeah, when he was on it,
it was really good. Yeah, he left that when he got
like, like. Too sick?
Yeah. Was it Charlie Sheen that we
took over after him? Maybe.
I think it might have been. Yeah, and that'll do it for the
better, known as Let's move on to the Crapshoot.

(01:05:28):
All right. There we go.
Oh yeah, I mentioned it before, but I fucking saw Sinners.
I have not stopped thinking about this fucking movie since.
It's that good, dude. It is fucking awesome.

(01:05:49):
Because like, the trailers make it look good.
It is a like, it's a really goodjust popcorn movie.
Like, yeah, you want to see like, you know, cool vampire
like movies in the South. Great, but there is so much to
unpack in this fucking movie. Like like first of all, like
hats off to Ryan Coogler becauseit's an original fucking story.

(01:06:12):
Completely original, not based on anything, an R rated movie
that raked in like 60 fucking something $1,000,000 this
weekend which is like mind blowing.
It is a good just you know like I said on its face popcorn like
you know movie. I want to watch a you know cool
vampire movie. There is so much subtext and so

(01:06:34):
much like stuff to dissect. There is one scene in this movie
that like I there was actually 2scenes because they mirror each
other that I cannot stop thinking about.
It is like everybody. You'll see it like I like.
I've been looking on threads mostly like it is just non-stop
like. Everybody's talking about the
same How? Awesome fucking this movie is

(01:06:54):
and like the like the scene and like it's it's this game.
I'm going to be like a. This isn't a plot spoiler, but
it does like give away like an artistic flourish basically
like, you know, so if you don't want to hear anything, fucking
tune out. Now I realize I was an asshole
last week and spoiled fucking Last of Us for probably a lot of
people, so I'm going to be trying to be better about that.

(01:07:18):
But the thing that I spoiled happened this week.
So yeah, yeah, yeah. There is like 1 scene.
Well, the beginning of the movie, they, there was like a
narration talking about how like, and you know, and like
every culture there is like the person they referred to as like
the firekeeper and like this culture, the, you know, whatever

(01:07:39):
in this culture, the griot and, and African culture, it's like
the person who is like the storyteller, like the, you know,
the musician, the storyteller, like the, the person who's, you
know, keeps everybody entertained at night.
Basically like, and like they talk about how like in, you
know, in legends, like they're, they're can, you know, this is
like an incredible gift and likeit can be so powerful that it

(01:08:01):
draws on spirits from the past and the future.
But also like, because of, you know, having this gift, it's
also like a magnet for evil. So it's like setting up the
fucking movie. And there is a fucking scene
that it, it's, it's like just mind blowing.
Like, one of the characters in the movie is like a younger kid
and like, he's learning to play the Blues.

(01:08:22):
Like, his father's a preacher. Like, doesn't want him to play
the Blues, obviously. And he's like, he's, he's his
cousins are, you know, Michael BJordan's characters.
And they're, they're picking himup.
They want him to work in their Juke joint that they're opening
up. And like, he's fucking amazing.
He's like, super talented and like, you know, he plays like a

(01:08:44):
couple of songs in the movies. Like, he plays for, like, Delroy
Lindo's character who's like a legendary Blues man.
He's like, blown away by him. Yeah, so like you just see like
little bits of it throughout themovie.
And then like when they're when the everything's going on at the
at the fucking at the Juke joint, like when it's in full
swing, like the party, the old Blues guy, like, you know, he's
like, yeah, we have a new guy here tonight.
We're going to pull him up to bring a song, you know, to play

(01:09:05):
a song. And like he plays a song and
it's just fucking it. Is this like it's this
incredible fucking scene. Like he's just playing his song
and like he's just, you know, it's it's it's beautiful fucking
song. Of course, like, you know, but
like, as he's playing it, like all of a sudden you see, like
the music changes a little bit. Like, you hear the guitar come
in, like an electric guitar. And then like, all of a sudden

(01:09:26):
there's a guy standing next to him looks like Bootsy Collins.
What? Yeah.
It's a little like, it's a little like, what the fuck?
Like, first, But like, you realize it's calling back to
that thing at the beginning where it's talking about how,
like, you know, this gets so powerful, it calls on, you know,
the future in the past. So like, you know, that guy
starts playing and then, like, you hear, like the music changes
again. And like, you see on stage,
there's a guy fucking like spinning records, like mixing
shit. And then like it's just fucking

(01:09:49):
all like these genres of music that have been like touched by
the Blues and like influenced bythe Blues and like just black
culture in general. Like just all start coming out
of the woodwork and like they'reall just playing this fucking
song until like literally they burn the roof down.
Like, you know, metaphorically, of course, but like it plays out
like, you know, they see the roof burning down until they're

(01:10:09):
just in like a a burning structure outside still playing
this fucking amazing song. And it's just like holy fuck,
that is like just mind blowing. And then like this plays on like
one of the major themes of the fucking movie.
How like, you know, the, the white vampire, like the, the

(01:10:31):
little heavy-handed, like you know, the, the metaphor sometime
is like just he basically his whole thing is he's like after
this kid, the kid who's playing the song and he's just, he's
like, I want your stories, I want your music.
He's just saying like it's all about cultural appropriation.
Like that part of it anyway. And like there's a scene later

(01:10:51):
on where it's the vampire leading the same type of thing
outside the barn and it's the same thing.
But well, it's the same thing. But also it's also the complete
opposite. Like it's fucking, you know,
somebody just playing music, doing it well.
But as opposed to like where youhad the scene earlier in the

(01:11:14):
Juke joint, it's like it's messy.
People are just dancing how theywant to dance.
Like they're all over the place.Like the kids just walking
around playing like, you know, just where wherever he goes,
he's playing like just gets all over.
And like, when the vampire is leading it, it's just like, he's
like doing this like super complicated, like Irish River

(01:11:34):
Dance where it's, you know, as opposed to like the kid, his
name's preacher boy, where he's just kind of like doing his own
thing. He's doing this like super like
just technical thing. And all the people, like all the
people who've been turned into vampires are like now like
singing and dancing, like all infucking unison.
And so, you know, it's mirroringthat scene, but it is completely

(01:11:58):
fucking soulless and like it's terrifying.
Whereas like the scene you just saw like a little while ago,
it's like, it's joyous. It's like overwhelming and it's
just fucking like, holy shit. And then you see it again.
It's just like chilling 'cause there's just nothing to it.
There's just, it's just soullesslike, and it's just, you know,

(01:12:18):
like he just, I just want your stories.
I want your music. I want to do that.
But it's going to be that same like soulless shit.
It's not going to be the same. Like fucking this movie is so
amazing. Like that's just one aspect of
the movie that I've just like gone on about for like 15
minutes. Like there are so many fucking
things to unpack in this movie. There is like a mid credit.

(01:12:41):
You have to stay till the very end 'cause like there's I
didn't, I didn't, I made the mistake of leaving early.
I caught the mid credits scene, which is the important one.
But there's another one like posts you remember when.
They used to put the movie in the movie.
Yeah, no this one was like this is a major scene that like is
should have been in the movie. The one in the mid credits

(01:13:02):
completely changes the fucking direction of everything changes.
Like this movie is so fucking good.
There is so much like any of themain characters you can do a
fucking movie on or like ATV series or a comic series.
Like there's so much potential like in this universe.
It's so fucking rich for storytelling.

(01:13:24):
Like Michael Jordan's characters, they're twins and
like, their story is like they're from this little like,
shitty town in Mississippi. But I didn't realize he played
two characters. Yeah, yeah, He plays twins.
They, I don't know if they get drafted or whatever, but you,
you know, they talk about they went off to war and then like
when they came back, they wantedto get out, so they went to
Chicago and we're working for like Al Capone.

(01:13:46):
Like that's a whole fucking movie in its own.
And then like, there's the wholevampire plot.
Yeah. Once that resolves, like it's
like, yeah, you think it's the end of the movie.
No, there's like a whole fuckingdessert fucking to the movie
where it's just like, I don't want to spoil it because it's

(01:14:07):
just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I like, I, it's like I spent like half my day at work today
for the few hours I actually didput in just bullshitting with
one of my one of my friends at work just talking about this
movie back and forth. Yeah.
It is like, I know people are hyping the shit out of it and

(01:14:28):
like, that's probably going to take away from some people's
like, you know, enjoyment of it,but it's fucking amazing.
Like, yeah, it is. It's like easily my movie of the
year so far. It's going to be very fucking
tough to be like, not just horror movie like movie ass
movie of the year. Yeah, yeah, the monkey did not

(01:14:49):
suck, surprisingly. Also, yeah.
Yeah, I didn't. Jesus Christ, I don't think I've
What have I done? We we are still hardcore binging
love after lock up. Just oh fuck, I realized I

(01:15:11):
haven't watched the. Fucking buffet of garbage.
I haven't watched Gemstones fromlast night yet.
Ohh yeah, no. I thought last weeks was great.
The one with Michael Rooker. Yeah, yeah.
Well, like you. Were saying it was like a filler
episode. The episode was good but like
there's no substance in it. Yeah, it just.
Brings in Michael Brooker. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I thought it was a great episode.

(01:15:33):
Yeah, yeah. Like the all of the.
Cause to me. All of the like prelude
character like episodes are likewhere they go back.
Yeah, kids. Like I wasn't a fan of the, the,
the opener with like Bradley Cooper and the fucking
Revolutionary War. You didn't like that?
I did not like that episode. Why?
I don't know. It just wasn't 'cause I was
waiting for like show to come back.

(01:15:54):
Like I probably would have likedit if it wasn't the opener.
I think like if that was like episode 2 or three.
I. I'll give you that.
Yeah, I'll give you that. But I will say this episode made
that episode better, like with the Bible coming back into play
like. Right, Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's
probably going to be a big feature of this this season.
Is that that Bible? Yeah, yeah, I, yeah, I guess so

(01:16:19):
like if like if you had like an intro episode with, you know,
something to do with that Bible and then you bring it back.
But I, I like the order that it was in.
I I was expecting the Bradley Cooper thing to like be cut like
halfway through and then go to athe modern timeline, but I liked

(01:16:43):
it like all the way through. It was a really, really well
done fucking episode. Yeah.
Oh, no, no, it was good. I was like, I just said, I was
like, so disappointed that like,we didn't get back to the show
first. Yeah, yeah.
But yeah, I know. I've been loving that show.
I think, I think it was OK for me because I've been binging it
up until that. So I'm like I've I've.
Just stoned. Wait a year to all.
Gemstoned up like. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Last of Us

(01:17:08):
came back this week and these first two episodes have been
fucking great. I got to watch that, like
everybody tells me. It's so good.
It's really good, yeah. Yeah, Monique watched it.
She she likes it. So maybe I'll rewatch it, or
she'll rewatch it and I'll go through the first time.
Yeah, I finished this week. The Creature Commandos comics.

(01:17:30):
Yeah, they're all right. They're pretty good.
Yeah, like most comic miniseriesare just like you.
Just read it like you. Can only do so much.
Yeah, it was good for a comic miniseries, I'll say.
Yeah, Yeah. It's not the characters from the
show, which is kind of disappointing.
Oh, really? Yeah.
Yeah. I didn't know that there was
like a revolving door of fuckingcharacters for them.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. But yeah, I, I I fucking love

(01:17:53):
that show. I can't recommend that enough.
They had AGI robot for T-shirt for sale this week at D Ville
and I almost got it. Isn't it a wonderful day to kill
Nazis? Yes.
All of them are. Let's see, what else have I
watched or done? Nothing.

(01:18:17):
Nothing really. I also saw the Amateur this week
at at the movies. That was pretty good too.
The Amateur with Rami Malek and Laurence Fishburne.
I don't. Score 3 Steve Ditko omnibus is
nice. Oh damn, I don't know that I

(01:18:38):
know what that is. It was pretty good.
It was like a like a spy thriller.
Rami Malek is like an analyst for like the CIA.
His wife is Rachel Brosnahan. Like, she is on like a business
trip in London, like, gets killed in a terrorist attack.
And he, like, just wants to fucking like, get the guys who

(01:18:59):
did it. Like, he wants to like, train to
like, be the guy who fucking goes after them and kill them.
He's just like, a little like, what's the analyst?
And he ends up like blackmailinghis bosses into letting him do
it, basically. And like, Laurence Fishburne is
like the guy who's supposed to train him.
And it's really fucking good. He ends up like, they're just

(01:19:20):
like his bosses are basically just stringing him along until
they can kill him till they know, like whatever he's got on
them, like isn't going to get out.
And like, yeah, he fucking goes after the people who are like,
you killed his way. And like, because he's like a
nerd. He like uses science and shit to
kill them. Yeah, it was it was pretty
fucking good. Pretty good movie.
Yeah. I.

(01:19:40):
Have to keep an eye out for that.
Yeah, I am. I'm really looking forward to
seeing sinners. I'm going to have to wait for
that to hit streaming though. Yeah.
Or maybe, maybe somebody has a cracked fire stick at their
house. Yeah.
Yeah, I I cannot recommend that enough.
I like. I got to see it again.

(01:20:02):
It was, it was really good. I'm just, I'm not excited about
anything new and coming out, I don't think.
And there's not really, I don't think there's much out right
now. Yeah.
Especially in terms of horror. Like you had centers, centers
and the monkey. The monkey was a while ago at
this point. Yeah, well, yeah.

(01:20:24):
Well, the monkey was what? February.
End of February? Was it really?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was only two months ago, but.
Trying to think of like, what's coming up as far as Horror
Warriors keeps getting talked about.
I really do want to see that. Warriors.

(01:20:45):
That is by the dude who made Barbarians or Barbarian.
Oh, OK. Zach Cregger from West Virginia.
Like barbarian was OK but like. I dug it.
I thought that was good. It was fine.
Like I, I don't, I like that it was, it was, you know, something
new and something different. I don't think it executed the
way people wanted it to. Yeah, ain't nothing coming out.

(01:21:11):
Yeah, although I think we're like finally getting to the
point where shit is coming out after the strikes.
Yeah, You know, I think, I thinkmy problem with Barbarian is the
same as like anything that has what's fucking Justin Long?

(01:21:31):
Justin Long. I don't think Justin Long is a
good horror actor. I think that's really what it
boils down to. He's like, he's in good stuff
and he is a good actor. Yeah.
I just don't like him in horror.I did watch a little bit of Tusk
this week. Why would you?
Because I gotta like it. Why?
It was odd. I don't understand why people

(01:21:51):
like Tusk. To each their own man.
Yes, but nobody can explain it to me.
They're just like, I don't know,I like it.
It's. Fucked up and I like it.
It's fine. It's fine.
I'm playing the hell to Call of Duty this week they they

(01:22:13):
introduced Jay and Silent Bob's playable character I.
Saw. And blunt man in Chronic 2.
Oh, I saw one of Jay's like finishing moves or whatever,
like make somebody do a bong RIPon a shotgun or something like
that. Blunt man comes with a blunt
Saber. Michael Parks rules in it.

(01:22:35):
Yeah, it's not a good reason. I can't hydrate, TJ.
Sorry, I finished my beer. Oh, didn't.
Work for the team. Yeah, what the fuck else?
I forgot to. I got to go to Earth World but I
forgot to look for the second issue of The Mummy when I was
there last time. Oh, really?
I do want to keep reading that. I don't know if I mentioned this

(01:22:58):
last week, last week, but I readabsolute Green Lantern, which is
pretty fucking good. I think I did mention that.
Yeah, yeah. It's it's a pretty crazy take on
it. Yeah, Yeah.
All right. Yeah, I want to get into those.
But like, now they're they're starting to expand too much to
the point where it's like, I don't want to buy 10 comics.

(01:23:19):
Yeah, exactly. I mean, they don't tie in yet,
right? But like, they're definitely
fucking going to. Open a new one of the terrorists
when it's Canadian beer man. You know the terrified to pay on
this shit. Nothing.

(01:23:40):
I'm trying to think of anything.I just probably more I every
week. I was like, oh fuck, I was going
to talk about that and I forgot.We have Saratoga coming up in
like a week and 1/2. I gotta do voice actor research.
Yeah, I haven't done it yet, butI got definitely gonna do that
this weekend. I'll fucking send you we're.

(01:24:00):
Still good for trivia cards fromthe last couple of times you've
done it. Yes, I have to specifically
track them down. No, I, I had this issue a couple
of months ago. I'm like, fuck, what happened to
trivia cards? And then I found them in the
they're in the gear bag with thewith the PA Shit.
I just hope I left them there. I'm like, I'm going to put them

(01:24:21):
in this special place where I'm definitely going to remember
where I put them. Oh, sure, Yeah, sure, sure.
Let's hope I didn't do that. Let's really hope I didn't do
that. I got to go buy some some more.
We have prizes to be clear, but I'm I'm going to sweeten that
pot a little bit. Saratoga's coming up.

(01:24:43):
Oh, we should throw up the. Oh yeah, the thing that I'm
like, we should always have thatup.
That's like a good that's good advertising right there.
And then people are like, oh, ittakes away from the visual of
the show it. Does.
I don't want it up the whole time, but oh, we're going to be

(01:25:06):
lousy. Not in a bad way.
We're going to be lousy with Mead at Saratoga Comic Con cause
Thor's bringing it. I think Boots is bringing it.
He said. Yeah, yeah.
So we're going to be, yeah, we're going to be inundated
Downing that delicious, delicious bull and bee Mead,
which you should go to the bull and bee.com and get some of
their meadery. Excuse me, Get some of their

(01:25:26):
Mead from that meadery. Yeah.
There's a that that Brouts is going to go UN avenged.
I can't hydrate. Sorry.
I'm out of here. Yeah.
And now, yeah, we're going to beat Saratoga and then we're going
to be at Mid Hudson. And Tampa Bay Comic Con, we'll
be. At Tampa Bay Comic Con at the
same time. Yeah, they announced this week.

(01:25:53):
Jonathan Reeves Davies. Oh yeah, that's right.
Yeah. So fucking that.
That could be odd. Please give me one.
Yeah, yeah, somebody else too. I forget, but that was another
big one. That's it.
That's where we're going to be. That's.
Where we're going to be, that's where we're going to be.
Anything else comes up, we will let you know.
Yeah, get your ass to Saratoga. It's May 3rd and 4th.

(01:26:15):
Yeah, you were not going to wantto miss the tribute.
I now that I got that bonus, I'mgoing to have to go to the
liquor store to stock up for that.
Oh Lord. I don't think I gave Bodega Cat
delivered by You know what? Let's fucking find out.
Let's fucking find out. I will try to get something out

(01:26:36):
of oh God, it's going to be bad,no.
It's going to be delicious, but anyway.
Yeah, we're going to. Give you guys our socials, some
advice and get the fuck out of here.
Our website is www.bigdumbmonsterspodcastbigdumbmonsters.com

(01:26:57):
You want to e-mail us? Get in touch with the show.
Suggest us movies, suggest us beer we should drink, things we
can change about the show. You've got a suggestion for a
show maybe you want to work with.
Us. Thank you, TJ.
Oh, yes, you bring the cookies. Thank you.
I just mentioned those awesome cookies the other day to

(01:27:18):
somebody. They're legit, yeah.
If you have anything that you want to do, work with us.
Hire us to host an event for you.
E-mail us Big Dumb [e-mail].
You can find us on Slasher, the all horror social network.
We are Big Dumb Monsters podcastand you can find us occasionally
logged into our Steam account playing video games as Big Dumb

(01:27:41):
Monsters. Also, yes, save art from
venezuelanprison.org. We are currently fundraising the
crowd. Crowd, crowd funding.
Yeah, to get art released from Secot any day now.

(01:28:03):
I am actually flying to El Salvador this week to meet with
the president to negotiate that release.
And always on SNAP. Yeah.
Somebody join us. Join our our SNAP.
Alliance. Alliance, Yeah.
MEH. MEHBDM network, yeah, yes, MEH
is our clan and then BDM networkis our our tag.

(01:28:26):
Yep. Has he been freed?
No. No.
Someday Soon. Fired.
Yeah. Fired.
No. No, he hasn't been fired.
He has I. Got to get a new glass.
I'm due next month. Jesus.
Christ, yeah, he he's been doingfirefighter training and EMT

(01:28:47):
training around. I'm a good person, I want to
help. But he's not.
He's not a good person. That's the fucked up part.
Known him? How long have I known him for?
Oh shit, 15 / 15 years now? Oh shit, yeah.

(01:29:08):
Yeah, we're not good people. You guys for eight years
already? Is that it?
That it, it seems. Yeah, it has been a while, yeah.
God damn. Well no.
You've known. You've known no longer than
that. Yeah, No, we've been playing D&D
for eight years. That's when I really knew you
guys. No, you have known since 20,

(01:29:28):
1515, whoever the TV show was, Jesus Christ, any who.
That boy is evil. I'm not saying I disagree.

(01:29:49):
Confirmed or denied? Want to find the show on Threads
or Instagram? You can find us at Big under
score, dumb under score monsters.
I had to think for a second. Am I giving the right address?
I was. You were.
Yeah. It's that's on both of those
platforms. If you are listening to this
show in the audio only podcast version, you are doing yourself

(01:30:12):
a disservice. You're missing out.
You're missing out on the live show that happens every Monday
night, 7:45 on Twitch and YouTube.
You can find us on both of thoseplatforms at Big Dumb Monsters.
You should go check us out there.
You should subscribe. You should like some videos.
Whatever you can do to help us out, we'd appreciate it.

(01:30:33):
Do the we're, we're trying to dothe grassroots following thing,
man. Like so anybody that listens or
watches and they like and subscribe and review it boosts
all the numbers. So then the next person can find
it from the algorithm. So it's it's, it's really
important. Is that all OJ what he said?

(01:30:58):
Eight years? OJ got 9 for killing two people.
OJ got nothing for killing two people.
Technically he got it for stealing merchandise, but we all
know he got it for killing two people.
Let's be realistic. Anyway, that could be debated on
another show that's going to be our like 4th or 5th episode of
what happens, happens whenever we get around the filming.
The other like three or four of those, yes.

(01:31:24):
You should also come check out our merch store that is at T
public.com. You can search for Big Dumb
Monsters and you'll find the BigDumb Monsters store where we
have all sorts of wares and merchandise for sale.
This is the part of the show where I forget that there's no

(01:31:44):
more plugs, so I'm just going tostop talking.
All right, now that's the part of the show where we give you
some advice and let you get on with you tonight.
Don't like goolooze? Eat your ass.
And never sleep in a deathbed. Bye bye.