September 26, 2024 • 26 mins
Have you ever thought, "How could it be any worse?" Some people with a brain injury have felt as if they are a kid again, as they had to relearn almost everything. Meet Bre: a BIND member, who was shot in the head at age 28. He was always a very social person, but had to relearn how to speak, eat, and understand everyday life.
Bre is just now starting on the road to independency and wants to help people support themselves. After his brain injury, he believes that he is more open-minded in several ways, including physically and spiritually, and he has now even returned to boxing.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:02):
Instrumental music playing
Carrie (00:11):
Hi, I'm Carrie, a stroke survivor and a member of BIND.
Kezia (00:15):
And I'm Kezia, stroke survivor and member of BIND as
well.
And today we're going to haveour guest, uh, who is actually a
brain, uh, brain injury memberof BIND too and he's super
special because as soon as wemet him, he was like, when am I
going to be on the podcast?
So we're super excited to havehim.
(00:35):
His name is Bre, and he's hereto share his story.
So welcome, Bre.
Bre (00:41):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you guys for having me.
Absolutely.
Mm-Hmm?
Brian (00:45):
Welcome to BINDWAVES, the official podcast of the Brain
Injury Network of Dallas.
I'm Brian White, BIND'sExecutive Director.
On each episode, we'll beproviding insight into the brain
injury community.
We'll be talking to members andprofessionals regarding their
stories and the important roleof BIND's Clubhouse.
We work as a team to inspirehope, community, and a sense of
(01:09):
purpose to survivors,caregivers, and the public.
Thank you for tuning intoBINDWAVES.
BINDWAVES Let's get on with theshow.
Kezia (01:17):
Yeah.
So just to, we kind of met you alittle while ago.
Mm-Hmm.
Uh, but just so people know alittle bit about you, uh, can
you share a little bit aboutyourself?
Bre (01:26):
Hmm.
Well, I'm Jabre.
Um, I'm born and raised on thewest side of Chicago.
Um, I resided here in Dallas,Texas.
I've been, uh, I've been hereover 10 years now.
And, um, I don't know too muchwhat to say about myself.
Kezia (01:46):
There's so much! There's so much! So can you share a
little bit about, um, you know,when we met you, like, why are
you a member of BIND?
And, like, just, like, a littletiny bit of your story.
Bre (01:59):
Okay, um, I was a innocent bystander, um, was shot in the
back of the head, uptown Dallas.
And, um, I'm still trying torecover since then.
And I joined the BIND program togive me something to do to help
me out to get better.
(02:20):
And also meet other people likeme as well.
So I've been part of BIND sinceearlier this year.
I look forward to being hereuntil I get better.
Carrie (02:32):
That's great.
We're excited that you joinedus, Bre.
So just tell us, I mean, we allgo through different emotions
and different things as werecover from our brain injury.
Yours is a little bit moreunique.
Um, but I know you said theyhaven't found the shooter.
You're still like up in the airwith that.
So how does that affect youemotionally?
Bre (02:52):
Hmm.
Carrie (02:55):
As much or as little as you want to share?
Hmm.
Bre (02:58):
Yes, um, you know what, uh, I think about my situation every
day, every day.
Um, but, um, it's therapeuticfor me to, to speak on it.
Um, that's my, uh, sign ofrelief.
My thing of coping with it is byspeaking on it.
Um, I was outside actually, uh,I was shot in the head, the back
(03:22):
of the head, October 24th, 2021,uptown Dallas.
Um, I was actually just having agreat night out, was actually
getting in my car, and, uh, asme getting in the middle, um, as
me getting in my car, I was shotin the back of the head.
The bullet went through the backof the brain and came out
(03:43):
through the front.
Um, I guess they was trying topronounce that I was dead on the
scene, but I was still there, Iwas still breathing, still there
talking to God while I wasbeing, uh.
waiting on the ambulance
Kezia (04:05):
I think it's like, I think your point of view about
how talking about your story andyour experience is important
because it is, it istherapeutic.
I think that right now that yousaid it happened in 2021, you
know, even though it's beenbasically about three years,
Bre (04:25):
going on three years,
Kezia (04:26):
and it feels like it's so new.
And it just happened.
And it's so important that youare able to share it because it
definitely, like on my point ofview, like on my experience, it
did take about three to fouryears for me, like not to cry
when I, and I had a, like mypoint of view, it's like so
different.
And really you're basically thefirst person I think I hear on
(04:51):
the podcast and Carrie cancorrect me if I'm wrong.
That's, um, brain injury.
Um, Experience is not really dueto our health, you know, like
not due to your health.
It's it was so surprising And
Bre (05:04):
yes,
Kezia (05:05):
I think you sharing your story is so important like
you're courageous Self I had tobe like, yeah, let me share
this.
So honestly, thank you so muchfor being here Carrie said if
you ever feel like somelimitations that's like nah, I
don't want to answer thatquestion You could totally say
that but because of the braininjury that you had like do you
(05:28):
have any limitations likeanything that you know you at
the moment of your recovery youcouldn't do or you still are
working on just because of theexperience of the brain injury
Bre (05:41):
Yes Before my injury came about before I was shot in the
back of the brain.
I was very independent Verysocial and a very hard worker.
Um, but due to that, um,incident there, I was 28 years
old when I got shot in the backof the head.
(06:02):
Very independent and then, um,just in the midst of being shot
in the back of the head, at 28years old, it was like I became
a newborn baby again.
Uh, I became very dependent.
Um, I remember waking up, Icouldn't talk.
I couldn't walk or eat.
(06:23):
So at the age of 28 years old, Ihad to learn how to talk, walk,
and eat.
Again.
And that blew my mind.
That blew my mind.
Kezia (06:35):
Yeah.
I think it's so interestingbecause I didn't even know your
age either.
I was, yeah, I was 28 when I hadthe stroke.
Okay.
And I, uh, First of all, I don'tthink I can understand that
there was something with me.
I felt like it was a nightmarethat was happening So I couldn't
even comprehend that like I wasreally in the hospital.
(06:56):
Um, but yeah, I get you that.
Like, it's like you're a babyagain.
I mean, I went to university.
I can't read.
I can't talk.
I can't, I can't walk.
Like it's, it's, it is mindblowing.
So, I get you with that.
Bre (07:10):
Oh, yeah.
Carrie (07:10):
Oh, yeah.
I mean, we're all, I thinkthat's the, that's the one
common denominator that I feellike all brain injury people
have is we all start over againas a baby.
You know, Carl Heller teaseseveryone.
He's like, We're the kids andthe staff are the adults, you
know.
But all we're gonna do, youknow, we all have to re learn a
lot of things.
(07:30):
We have to re learn how to walk,how to talk.
Fortunately, I didn't have to relearn how to talk.
I was 38.
I was old compared to y'all whenI had my stroke..
That's okay.
But I have to, I was paralyzed.
I had to re learn how to walk aswell.
So, I mean, if you think aboutit, I mean, are there still
things that you're having to relearn on a daily basis?
That's kind of what we've beenfocusing a lot on this year.
(07:53):
How different things changeafter a brain injury.
Even as we start to get betterand we start to heal, there's
still things that we have torelearn on a daily basis.
So, what challenges are youstill, are you done with therapy
now?
I know we were talking aboutyour boxing right now, but is
that your own personal way oftherapy?
Bre (08:12):
Oh, um, so yes, um, I was just, I just finished my, uh,
therapy with Rehab without Wallsthey did a great job with me.
They did a very great job andI'm very appreciative for Rehab
Without Walls.
And I also, um, went to atherapy program called Pate.
(08:33):
Them folks helped me as well.
They did a great job.
Pate.
and Rehab Without Walls.
I thank you guys for helping me.
And, uh, they built me up towhere I'm at today.
Uh, there's so many, uh,struggles I have on a day to day
basis.
I'm still dependent due to thehealing.
(08:54):
I'm still in my healing recoveryright now and I'm very much
dependent still.
But I work every day on tryingto be independent again.
And also, um, try to enjoy myyouth years as much as I can
while I'm still here.
You know, so, um, every day, um,I have a lot of struggles.
Um, But I try my best toovercome.
(09:18):
That's all.
Carrie (09:19):
Exactly.
Yes.
Kezia (09:26):
And I think, um, I hear you say dependent a lot.
And I just would like to giveyou some encouragement.
And not that you're asking forme.
You could totally like, be like,nah.
Um, but, It doesn't have, it'snot going to be like that
forever.
Um, you know, like sometimes Ifeel like I'm very dependent of
(09:49):
like my mom because she'sTechnic, not technically, I
think out of like motherhood andmy, my experience like my
caregiver but really she's alsojust my mom.
This is like a normal normal momwould do to everyone.
Um, but like, these are skillsthat also a lot of people would
(10:09):
need to learn anyway.
Like I forgot my passwords forlike my bank accounts.
I forgot my passwords foreverything and they're still
hard to remember.
So how do we get through withthis?
Like on a normal day to daylife, like how do we get, back
to being independent.
(10:30):
And that's going to take a longtime.
Like, you know, I, it took melike five years to be able to
drive.
Um, and then, you know, I justalways hit a bit hiccup.
So like I can't be back todriving alone, um, at the
moment, but it'll come back.
Right.
So it's just, it definitelytakes a long time.
(10:52):
Um, but right now you say you'redependent.
So I'm just gonna, yeah.
Change that.
Like what support system do youhave, you know?
Bre (11:03):
--Okay.
Um, my, um, support system is mymother.
Um, I thank God for all thetime.
Um, cause I don't know where I'dbe if I didn't have my mom,
especially in this type ofsituation I'm going through now.
And I'm very thankful for, and Iwould like to give her a shout
out why you just brought up thatquestion.
(11:24):
Um, I would like to thank you,mom.
Thank you, Joanna Swannigan.
Thank you.
Carrie (11:30):
Thank you, mom.
Kezia (11:33):
Yeah, and like, how do you, like, what's your, your
strategy?
Like, like I said, you're notdependent.
Um, I think that there's daysand there's ways that you use,
not use, but like, you have thesupport system?
Like how do you, how do you askfor help or like how, how, in
(11:55):
what ways is she supporting you?
Bre (11:58):
Um, well, I know, um, once again, I'm very, um, not, I
don't wanna say prideful, butI'm a very stand up guy, very
independent man.
And, uh, but tomorrow I'm stillher baby, you know, um,
Kezia (12:17):
that doesn't stop to anybody.
right?
Right.
Bre (12:20):
So, um.
Due to the injury, you know, uh,I feel like a kid all over again
due to mom trying to help merecover and heal.
Um, it's very difficult.
It's very, very difficult for meto, uh, kind of understand that,
but I'm very grateful for it.
And, uh, like you said, um, I'mnot dependent.
(12:43):
Um, it's just, uh, you know, atime and a phase that I'm going
through due to the injury comeabout, but I also know that
it'll This thing, you know, willbe a pass for me.
Yeah, that's a phase that I'mgoing through.
Carrie (12:56):
I totally understand where you're coming from,
because I had my stroke, like Isaid, at 38, and because I was
paralyzed, I couldn't live aloneanymore.
One, paralyzed, no money, can'tlive alone, so I had to move
home with my parents.
And yes, I'm very thankful formy parents, too, and probably
one of the hardest things for meto do was ask for help.
Yes.
I'm like you, I'm veryindependent, I'm very proud,
(13:18):
prideful, and I was gonna do itall on my own.
Well, guess what, Carrie?
You only have one hand thatworks.
You can't do it all on your own.
Bre (13:26):
Right.
Carrie (13:26):
But, saying, Mom, can you do this for me?
Or, Dad, can you do this for me?
Was one of the hardest things Ihad to realize.
It's okay to ask for help.
We all need a little bit ofhelp.
And I think that's a lot of whatwe try to do here at BIND is,
we're here to help each other.
It's not just about me at BIND.
It's about all of us as a group.
(13:46):
We're all going, we've all beenthere.
We're all going through the samething, so we're here to help
each other through this recoveryprocess because recovery is
lifelong and we're very thankfulthat we have.
We will be your new supportgroup along with your mom.
We're here to support you andlift you up and help you become
that independent man that weknow you are.
Thank you.
Absolutely.
(14:07):
But, so do you think, whenyou're looking at it now and
we're talking, do you, can youyet see any positives that have
come out of this tragic event?
Bre (14:21):
Yes, um, like I like to tell people, um, I didn't know,
um, what I used this term due tome being shot in the back of the
head.
It came all the way to the frontof my eye, to the right side of
my head, and caused me to beblind, and I'm on the right side
(14:41):
of my eye.
And like I tell people, um, Ididn't lose an eye, I gained a
third one.
Um.
my whole world shifted.
Um, You know, with the higherspirit that I have, I can't
think of nothing negative fromthe situation.
I think nothing but positivebecause, um, I sit, I sit back
(15:04):
when I get the chance and havethoughts to myself.
I say, oh man, you know, um,it's like the injury caused me
to be more, I don't want to saymore positive, boom.
More open minded than I was.
I always thought I'd been openminded, but this took me to a
whole other place.
Um, but um, hmm, I'm sorry, Idon't know how the word to
(15:31):
correct.
No, you're good.
But yes, it did put me more offin a positive space.
Um, actually, due to my injury,um, it caused me to lose
everything that I own.
And, uh, but it put me in aspace to the point where I know
things.
Oh, I get that back.
(15:52):
Okay, I lost this, I lost that.
It'll come back again.
Um, when you've been at the verybottom of your life or the
worstest part of your life, it'slike, what else can, you know,
what can hurt me more than thishere?
So I think look I take thingsand use it as the positive
(16:12):
because I know it's just a phaseand a stage that you know things
will will be greater later.
And that's how I look at thingsto get me through my situation
today
Carrie (16:20):
Yes,
Bre (16:27):
ma'am, thank you
Kezia (16:30):
so much for saying that I hope that everyone hears that as
Like your change of perspective,right?
Like you're just seeeverything's super different.
Oh yes.
I'm going to take a tiny littlebreak and just remind all of our
listeners that we do this everyThursday on your favorite
platform to just watch, uh, orlisten or both, uh, our podcast
(16:53):
for BINDWAVES.
So I loved what you were sayingright now, because it's true.
Like, I think that too,actually, like.
How can it get any worse?
Like, it's like, yeah, I don'tknow.
I don't think it could get anyworse, right?
So I think that's, that's a goodperspective to have.
(17:14):
Um, And I don't know, I feellike sometimes it's like
justifying what, what justhappened.
Like, I don't know why, I don'tknow what, but it happened, and
it's just a hiccup.
Of my life.
I mean it hurt like it wasreally hard to get over right or
not get over but be able to talkabout it, but It's not gonna be
(17:37):
forever.
Yeah, and so you've had likepretty much yeah, um again
you're pretty courageous to betalking about it.
I mean, that's 2021 and we're in2024 Like I would not be in I
would not be you.
I would still be like, I don'twant to talk about it.
I hate new doctors that ask meall the questions.
(17:59):
Like, I would not be at thatplace.
Um, but, like, currently whatyou're doing, it's like, out of
rehabilitation.
Like, what What did you learnfrom rehabilitation that you're
currently using, um, now thatyou don't have the physical
therapist, you don't have thespeech pathologist, like you
don't have, you know,occupational therapy.
(18:20):
What did you learn from therethat you are now using now on
your own?
Bre (18:26):
Um, well, the programs, they did teach me so much and,
uh, everything that they hastaught me so far, uh, I use it
in my everyday life.
Mm hmm.
Um.
Everything.
Even from the time I have to beup.
Versus me just sleeping in, inthe morning.
(18:46):
I take that.
As simple as something likethat, I take it.
Well, I know I have to be up.
You know, get that in.
I mean, get that in my routineas a daily habit.
Um, um, them people help me outa lot.
Um, so much.
Yeah.
I'm very thankful for them.
Kezia (19:05):
Yeah, I know Carrie said it already, but tell our
listeners that you're doing,like, um, boxing.
Like, what does that do for you?
I'm like, it's, don't keep it asecret.
Carrie (19:17):
Okay.
Tell us some of Joey Kitching sowe can try to do it too.
Bre (19:22):
Well, I know, um, I know I couldn't just sit in the house
forever and not do nothing.
Um, it's very difficult for meto.
To even learn how to walk andrun, to even want to exercise.
I knew that was going to be verychallenging for me, but I said,
(19:43):
man, I can't let nothing stopme.
If a bullet to the head couldn'tstop me, nothing else can.
So I kind of took that as mymentality and, uh, got into
boxing.
I wanted to get into boxing justso I could stay in shape because
my, um, my movement is limited.
(20:04):
Due to my injury, um, but I justknow I couldn't just sit home
and just blow up.
So, um, I got into boxing.
Uh, when I got into boxing, theytaught me how to, uh, I guess
speed walk and to jogging,jogging and to running.
And, um, you know, it kind ofbuilt me up.
(20:27):
And, uh, When I got there, Ikind of fell in love with it.
Um, it kept a lot of weight downoff of me.
It, uh, it helped me outmentally and physically, of
course.
And, um, it just got me wantingto stay more in shape now.
And, uh, the more I, uh, box,and the more I get in shape, the
(20:49):
more focused I become, the moreHmm.
The more I know that thingsbetter are about to come about.
Yeah.
Um, as I told you guys earlier,I went from not walking, talking
or eating to now doing all thosethings that I couldn't do.
Carrie (21:10):
And I think what you said is very important is you
need a routine.
I mean, that's one thing that Ilearned early on too, is you
can't just sit at home.
So like the day neuro programthat I went to, which is similar
to a PATE, they wouldn'tgraduate us until we got a
volunteer job.
Um, So I had, you know, so Iwent from doing five days a week
of therapy to two days a week ofjust volunteering and three days
(21:36):
being at home.
But yeah, like you, I realizedthere's, you need a routine
because if you just sit aroundand do nothing, you're going to
lose all that process, all thatprogress that you've already put
into your recovery and you don'twant to do that.
So that kind of leads me to aquestion that I haven't asked
and just start regular everydaytalks.
How did you hear about this?
(21:56):
How did you hear about BIND?
Bre (21:57):
Um, actually, um, I actually heard from you guys,
um, from my neurologist.
Um, I had an appointment.
I was, um, telling mom once Icame home, Hey, um, I gotta find
something to do.
I just don't want to sit hereand not do nothing.
(22:18):
And, uh, my neurologist, shesaid, hey, try this program
called BIND.
And, uh, I was so curious and,uh, interested in doing it, uh,
signed myself up and, uh, madeit happen.
That's great.
And I'm here with you guys.
Mm hmm.
Carrie (22:34):
That's awesome.
Yeah, it's a great part of, Iknow, our routine, you know.
When I first started, I camefive days a week, and that got
overwhelming after a while, so Idon't come five days a week
anymore.
But I stay busy, but yeah.
But that's great that you heardfrom a neurologist.
That's a new one.
I haven't heard that one yet.
I thought you were going to sayPate or Rehab without Walls
Kezia (22:53):
yeah, that's awesome.
And I actually really like thatyou're interested in coming.
I think that's also good thatyou had your own, your own push,
right?
Oh, yes.
And then, right now, do you haveany goals for your, like,
upcoming, you know, your goals,whether they're mini or big,
whatever they are, like, foryour future, and, like, how much
(23:15):
you're investing in yourself.
Like, do you have any goals?
Bre (23:19):
Oh yes, um, my goals overall, overall goals are just
to, uh, be a better version ofme than I once was before my
injury.
Um, just being, uh, mentally,um, physically, spiritually,
(23:39):
just, just, um, try to be thebest that I can be.
That's all, that's my main goal,and overall.
Carrie (23:47):
That's great, I love it.
So, I mean, you're a fairly newbrain injury survivor.
Um, is there anything that you'dlike to share to our listeners,
and our just new survivors, thatyou've learned for a positive,
for them, for recovering, in thebeginning of recovery, like,
anything you want to let peopleknow?
Bre (24:08):
Um, yes, um, for all the, um, brain injury people, and the
future brain injury peoplecoming about.
Just keep going.
Please don't stop.
The more you keep going, thebetter you're going to become.
Yep.
Um, that's all I have to say.
Just keep going.
It's going to be rough.
It's going to be hard.
(24:29):
You're going to have your mentalbreakdowns, you know, go through
your depression, your stress,but just keep going.
The moment you stop, it's whenit all started falling down, but
you keep going, you're going tokeep getting better for sure.
Carrie (24:46):
I 100 percent agree with you, Bre.
That is a great mentality tohave and I'm so glad you're here
and I'm so glad to see yourpositivity.
That makes me smile and makes mehappy.
Thank you.
But we do appreciate you so muchfor having the courage to come
on and share your story becauseit's not our normal brain injury
story that we share.
Thank you so much for being apart of our podcast.
Bre (25:05):
Thank you guys for having me.
Thank you.
Kezia (25:08):
And of course, of course, not only thank you, um, thank
you guys that are listening, um,but of course if you would like
to contact us, uh, from BIND,uh, from BIND.
and the podcast, you can alwaysemail us at
bindwaves@thebind.org Follow ourInstagram account, which is of
(25:30):
course at bindwaves, uh, andvisit our website, uh, which is
the bind.org/bindwaves And ofcourse, if you are interested in
any of becoming either a memberlike Bre uh, you can always go
on our website and fill out the,uh, the forms.
Carrie (25:50):
And again, don't forget to click that like button, that
share button, that subscribebutton, and if you're on
YouTube, that notify button, andjust continue listening on all
your favorite platforms.
Kezia (26:03):
Like I said earlier, every Thursday you will find us
in your favorite platforms, sodon't miss out.
Until next time!
Carrie (26:11):
Until next time!
We hope you've enjoyed listeningto BIND Waves and continue to
support BIND and our non profitmission.
We support brain injurysurvivors as they reconnect into
the life, the community, andtheir workplace.
And we couldn't do that withoutgreat listeners like you.
We appreciate each and every oneof you.
Continue watching.
Until next time.
Until next time.
Instrumental music playing
Carrie (00:11):
Hi, I'm Carrie, a stroke survivor and a member of BIND.
Kezia (00:15):
And I'm Kezia, stroke survivor and member of BIND as
well.
And today we're going to haveour guest, uh, who is actually a
brain, uh, brain injury memberof BIND too and he's super
special because as soon as wemet him, he was like, when am I
going to be on the podcast?
So we're super excited to havehim.
(00:35):
His name is Bre, and he's hereto share his story.
So welcome, Bre.
Bre (00:41):
Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you guys for having me.
Absolutely.
Mm-Hmm?
Brian (00:45):
Welcome to BINDWAVES, the official podcast of the Brain
Injury Network of Dallas.
I'm Brian White, BIND'sExecutive Director.
On each episode, we'll beproviding insight into the brain
injury community.
We'll be talking to members andprofessionals regarding their
stories and the important roleof BIND's Clubhouse.
We work as a team to inspirehope, community, and a sense of
(01:09):
purpose to survivors,caregivers, and the public.
Thank you for tuning intoBINDWAVES.
BINDWAVES Let's get on with theshow.
Kezia (01:17):
Yeah.
So just to, we kind of met you alittle while ago.
Mm-Hmm.
Uh, but just so people know alittle bit about you, uh, can
you share a little bit aboutyourself?
Bre (01:26):
Hmm.
Well, I'm Jabre.
Um, I'm born and raised on thewest side of Chicago.
Um, I resided here in Dallas,Texas.
I've been, uh, I've been hereover 10 years now.
And, um, I don't know too muchwhat to say about myself.
Kezia (01:46):
There's so much! There's so much! So can you share a
little bit about, um, you know,when we met you, like, why are
you a member of BIND?
And, like, just, like, a littletiny bit of your story.
Bre (01:59):
Okay, um, I was a innocent bystander, um, was shot in the
back of the head, uptown Dallas.
And, um, I'm still trying torecover since then.
And I joined the BIND program togive me something to do to help
me out to get better.
(02:20):
And also meet other people likeme as well.
So I've been part of BIND sinceearlier this year.
I look forward to being hereuntil I get better.
Carrie (02:32):
That's great.
We're excited that you joinedus, Bre.
So just tell us, I mean, we allgo through different emotions
and different things as werecover from our brain injury.
Yours is a little bit moreunique.
Um, but I know you said theyhaven't found the shooter.
You're still like up in the airwith that.
So how does that affect youemotionally?
Bre (02:52):
Hmm.
Carrie (02:55):
As much or as little as you want to share?
Hmm.
Bre (02:58):
Yes, um, you know what, uh, I think about my situation every
day, every day.
Um, but, um, it's therapeuticfor me to, to speak on it.
Um, that's my, uh, sign ofrelief.
My thing of coping with it is byspeaking on it.
Um, I was outside actually, uh,I was shot in the head, the back
(03:22):
of the head, October 24th, 2021,uptown Dallas.
Um, I was actually just having agreat night out, was actually
getting in my car, and, uh, asme getting in the middle, um, as
me getting in my car, I was shotin the back of the head.
The bullet went through the backof the brain and came out
(03:43):
through the front.
Um, I guess they was trying topronounce that I was dead on the
scene, but I was still there, Iwas still breathing, still there
talking to God while I wasbeing, uh.
waiting on the ambulance
Kezia (04:05):
I think it's like, I think your point of view about
how talking about your story andyour experience is important
because it is, it istherapeutic.
I think that right now that yousaid it happened in 2021, you
know, even though it's beenbasically about three years,
Bre (04:25):
going on three years,
Kezia (04:26):
and it feels like it's so new.
And it just happened.
And it's so important that youare able to share it because it
definitely, like on my point ofview, like on my experience, it
did take about three to fouryears for me, like not to cry
when I, and I had a, like mypoint of view, it's like so
different.
And really you're basically thefirst person I think I hear on
(04:51):
the podcast and Carrie cancorrect me if I'm wrong.
That's, um, brain injury.
Um, Experience is not really dueto our health, you know, like
not due to your health.
It's it was so surprising And
Bre (05:04):
yes,
Kezia (05:05):
I think you sharing your story is so important like
you're courageous Self I had tobe like, yeah, let me share
this.
So honestly, thank you so muchfor being here Carrie said if
you ever feel like somelimitations that's like nah, I
don't want to answer thatquestion You could totally say
that but because of the braininjury that you had like do you
(05:28):
have any limitations likeanything that you know you at
the moment of your recovery youcouldn't do or you still are
working on just because of theexperience of the brain injury
Bre (05:41):
Yes Before my injury came about before I was shot in the
back of the brain.
I was very independent Verysocial and a very hard worker.
Um, but due to that, um,incident there, I was 28 years
old when I got shot in the backof the head.
(06:02):
Very independent and then, um,just in the midst of being shot
in the back of the head, at 28years old, it was like I became
a newborn baby again.
Uh, I became very dependent.
Um, I remember waking up, Icouldn't talk.
I couldn't walk or eat.
(06:23):
So at the age of 28 years old, Ihad to learn how to talk, walk,
and eat.
Again.
And that blew my mind.
That blew my mind.
Kezia (06:35):
Yeah.
I think it's so interestingbecause I didn't even know your
age either.
I was, yeah, I was 28 when I hadthe stroke.
Okay.
And I, uh, First of all, I don'tthink I can understand that
there was something with me.
I felt like it was a nightmarethat was happening So I couldn't
even comprehend that like I wasreally in the hospital.
(06:56):
Um, but yeah, I get you that.
Like, it's like you're a babyagain.
I mean, I went to university.
I can't read.
I can't talk.
I can't, I can't walk.
Like it's, it's, it is mindblowing.
So, I get you with that.
Bre (07:10):
Oh, yeah.
Carrie (07:10):
Oh, yeah.
I mean, we're all, I thinkthat's the, that's the one
common denominator that I feellike all brain injury people
have is we all start over againas a baby.
You know, Carl Heller teaseseveryone.
He's like, We're the kids andthe staff are the adults, you
know.
But all we're gonna do, youknow, we all have to re learn a
lot of things.
(07:30):
We have to re learn how to walk,how to talk.
Fortunately, I didn't have to relearn how to talk.
I was 38.
I was old compared to y'all whenI had my stroke..
That's okay.
But I have to, I was paralyzed.
I had to re learn how to walk aswell.
So, I mean, if you think aboutit, I mean, are there still
things that you're having to relearn on a daily basis?
That's kind of what we've beenfocusing a lot on this year.
(07:53):
How different things changeafter a brain injury.
Even as we start to get betterand we start to heal, there's
still things that we have torelearn on a daily basis.
So, what challenges are youstill, are you done with therapy
now?
I know we were talking aboutyour boxing right now, but is
that your own personal way oftherapy?
Bre (08:12):
Oh, um, so yes, um, I was just, I just finished my, uh,
therapy with Rehab without Wallsthey did a great job with me.
They did a very great job andI'm very appreciative for Rehab
Without Walls.
And I also, um, went to atherapy program called Pate.
(08:33):
Them folks helped me as well.
They did a great job.
Pate.
and Rehab Without Walls.
I thank you guys for helping me.
And, uh, they built me up towhere I'm at today.
Uh, there's so many, uh,struggles I have on a day to day
basis.
I'm still dependent due to thehealing.
(08:54):
I'm still in my healing recoveryright now and I'm very much
dependent still.
But I work every day on tryingto be independent again.
And also, um, try to enjoy myyouth years as much as I can
while I'm still here.
You know, so, um, every day, um,I have a lot of struggles.
Um, But I try my best toovercome.
(09:18):
That's all.
Carrie (09:19):
Exactly.
Yes.
Kezia (09:26):
And I think, um, I hear you say dependent a lot.
And I just would like to giveyou some encouragement.
And not that you're asking forme.
You could totally like, be like,nah.
Um, but, It doesn't have, it'snot going to be like that
forever.
Um, you know, like sometimes Ifeel like I'm very dependent of
(09:49):
like my mom because she'sTechnic, not technically, I
think out of like motherhood andmy, my experience like my
caregiver but really she's alsojust my mom.
This is like a normal normal momwould do to everyone.
Um, but like, these are skillsthat also a lot of people would
(10:09):
need to learn anyway.
Like I forgot my passwords forlike my bank accounts.
I forgot my passwords foreverything and they're still
hard to remember.
So how do we get through withthis?
Like on a normal day to daylife, like how do we get, back
to being independent.
(10:30):
And that's going to take a longtime.
Like, you know, I, it took melike five years to be able to
drive.
Um, and then, you know, I justalways hit a bit hiccup.
So like I can't be back todriving alone, um, at the
moment, but it'll come back.
Right.
So it's just, it definitelytakes a long time.
(10:52):
Um, but right now you say you'redependent.
So I'm just gonna, yeah.
Change that.
Like what support system do youhave, you know?
Bre (11:03):
--Okay.
Um, my, um, support system is mymother.
Um, I thank God for all thetime.
Um, cause I don't know where I'dbe if I didn't have my mom,
especially in this type ofsituation I'm going through now.
And I'm very thankful for, and Iwould like to give her a shout
out why you just brought up thatquestion.
(11:24):
Um, I would like to thank you,mom.
Thank you, Joanna Swannigan.
Thank you.
Carrie (11:30):
Thank you, mom.
Kezia (11:33):
Yeah, and like, how do you, like, what's your, your
strategy?
Like, like I said, you're notdependent.
Um, I think that there's daysand there's ways that you use,
not use, but like, you have thesupport system?
Like how do you, how do you askfor help or like how, how, in
(11:55):
what ways is she supporting you?
Bre (11:58):
Um, well, I know, um, once again, I'm very, um, not, I
don't wanna say prideful, butI'm a very stand up guy, very
independent man.
And, uh, but tomorrow I'm stillher baby, you know, um,
Kezia (12:17):
that doesn't stop to anybody.
right?
Right.
Bre (12:20):
So, um.
Due to the injury, you know, uh,I feel like a kid all over again
due to mom trying to help merecover and heal.
Um, it's very difficult.
It's very, very difficult for meto, uh, kind of understand that,
but I'm very grateful for it.
And, uh, like you said, um, I'mnot dependent.
(12:43):
Um, it's just, uh, you know, atime and a phase that I'm going
through due to the injury comeabout, but I also know that
it'll This thing, you know, willbe a pass for me.
Yeah, that's a phase that I'mgoing through.
Carrie (12:56):
I totally understand where you're coming from,
because I had my stroke, like Isaid, at 38, and because I was
paralyzed, I couldn't live aloneanymore.
One, paralyzed, no money, can'tlive alone, so I had to move
home with my parents.
And yes, I'm very thankful formy parents, too, and probably
one of the hardest things for meto do was ask for help.
Yes.
I'm like you, I'm veryindependent, I'm very proud,
(13:18):
prideful, and I was gonna do itall on my own.
Well, guess what, Carrie?
You only have one hand thatworks.
You can't do it all on your own.
Bre (13:26):
Right.
Carrie (13:26):
But, saying, Mom, can you do this for me?
Or, Dad, can you do this for me?
Was one of the hardest things Ihad to realize.
It's okay to ask for help.
We all need a little bit ofhelp.
And I think that's a lot of whatwe try to do here at BIND is,
we're here to help each other.
It's not just about me at BIND.
It's about all of us as a group.
(13:46):
We're all going, we've all beenthere.
We're all going through the samething, so we're here to help
each other through this recoveryprocess because recovery is
lifelong and we're very thankfulthat we have.
We will be your new supportgroup along with your mom.
We're here to support you andlift you up and help you become
that independent man that weknow you are.
Thank you.
Absolutely.
(14:07):
But, so do you think, whenyou're looking at it now and
we're talking, do you, can youyet see any positives that have
come out of this tragic event?
Bre (14:21):
Yes, um, like I like to tell people, um, I didn't know,
um, what I used this term due tome being shot in the back of the
head.
It came all the way to the frontof my eye, to the right side of
my head, and caused me to beblind, and I'm on the right side
(14:41):
of my eye.
And like I tell people, um, Ididn't lose an eye, I gained a
third one.
Um.
my whole world shifted.
Um, You know, with the higherspirit that I have, I can't
think of nothing negative fromthe situation.
I think nothing but positivebecause, um, I sit, I sit back
(15:04):
when I get the chance and havethoughts to myself.
I say, oh man, you know, um,it's like the injury caused me
to be more, I don't want to saymore positive, boom.
More open minded than I was.
I always thought I'd been openminded, but this took me to a
whole other place.
Um, but um, hmm, I'm sorry, Idon't know how the word to
(15:31):
correct.
No, you're good.
But yes, it did put me more offin a positive space.
Um, actually, due to my injury,um, it caused me to lose
everything that I own.
And, uh, but it put me in aspace to the point where I know
things.
Oh, I get that back.
(15:52):
Okay, I lost this, I lost that.
It'll come back again.
Um, when you've been at the verybottom of your life or the
worstest part of your life, it'slike, what else can, you know,
what can hurt me more than thishere?
So I think look I take thingsand use it as the positive
(16:12):
because I know it's just a phaseand a stage that you know things
will will be greater later.
And that's how I look at thingsto get me through my situation
today
Carrie (16:20):
Yes,
Bre (16:27):
ma'am, thank you
Kezia (16:30):
so much for saying that I hope that everyone hears that as
Like your change of perspective,right?
Like you're just seeeverything's super different.
Oh yes.
I'm going to take a tiny littlebreak and just remind all of our
listeners that we do this everyThursday on your favorite
platform to just watch, uh, orlisten or both, uh, our podcast
(16:53):
for BINDWAVES.
So I loved what you were sayingright now, because it's true.
Like, I think that too,actually, like.
How can it get any worse?
Like, it's like, yeah, I don'tknow.
I don't think it could get anyworse, right?
So I think that's, that's a goodperspective to have.
(17:14):
Um, And I don't know, I feellike sometimes it's like
justifying what, what justhappened.
Like, I don't know why, I don'tknow what, but it happened, and
it's just a hiccup.
Of my life.
I mean it hurt like it wasreally hard to get over right or
not get over but be able to talkabout it, but It's not gonna be
(17:37):
forever.
Yeah, and so you've had likepretty much yeah, um again
you're pretty courageous to betalking about it.
I mean, that's 2021 and we're in2024 Like I would not be in I
would not be you.
I would still be like, I don'twant to talk about it.
I hate new doctors that ask meall the questions.
(17:59):
Like, I would not be at thatplace.
Um, but, like, currently whatyou're doing, it's like, out of
rehabilitation.
Like, what What did you learnfrom rehabilitation that you're
currently using, um, now thatyou don't have the physical
therapist, you don't have thespeech pathologist, like you
don't have, you know,occupational therapy.
(18:20):
What did you learn from therethat you are now using now on
your own?
Bre (18:26):
Um, well, the programs, they did teach me so much and,
uh, everything that they hastaught me so far, uh, I use it
in my everyday life.
Mm hmm.
Um.
Everything.
Even from the time I have to beup.
Versus me just sleeping in, inthe morning.
(18:46):
I take that.
As simple as something likethat, I take it.
Well, I know I have to be up.
You know, get that in.
I mean, get that in my routineas a daily habit.
Um, um, them people help me outa lot.
Um, so much.
Yeah.
I'm very thankful for them.
Kezia (19:05):
Yeah, I know Carrie said it already, but tell our
listeners that you're doing,like, um, boxing.
Like, what does that do for you?
I'm like, it's, don't keep it asecret.
Carrie (19:17):
Okay.
Tell us some of Joey Kitching sowe can try to do it too.
Bre (19:22):
Well, I know, um, I know I couldn't just sit in the house
forever and not do nothing.
Um, it's very difficult for meto.
To even learn how to walk andrun, to even want to exercise.
I knew that was going to be verychallenging for me, but I said,
(19:43):
man, I can't let nothing stopme.
If a bullet to the head couldn'tstop me, nothing else can.
So I kind of took that as mymentality and, uh, got into
boxing.
I wanted to get into boxing justso I could stay in shape because
my, um, my movement is limited.
(20:04):
Due to my injury, um, but I justknow I couldn't just sit home
and just blow up.
So, um, I got into boxing.
Uh, when I got into boxing, theytaught me how to, uh, I guess
speed walk and to jogging,jogging and to running.
And, um, you know, it kind ofbuilt me up.
(20:27):
And, uh, When I got there, Ikind of fell in love with it.
Um, it kept a lot of weight downoff of me.
It, uh, it helped me outmentally and physically, of
course.
And, um, it just got me wantingto stay more in shape now.
And, uh, the more I, uh, box,and the more I get in shape, the
(20:49):
more focused I become, the moreHmm.
The more I know that thingsbetter are about to come about.
Yeah.
Um, as I told you guys earlier,I went from not walking, talking
or eating to now doing all thosethings that I couldn't do.
Carrie (21:10):
And I think what you said is very important is you
need a routine.
I mean, that's one thing that Ilearned early on too, is you
can't just sit at home.
So like the day neuro programthat I went to, which is similar
to a PATE, they wouldn'tgraduate us until we got a
volunteer job.
Um, So I had, you know, so Iwent from doing five days a week
of therapy to two days a week ofjust volunteering and three days
(21:36):
being at home.
But yeah, like you, I realizedthere's, you need a routine
because if you just sit aroundand do nothing, you're going to
lose all that process, all thatprogress that you've already put
into your recovery and you don'twant to do that.
So that kind of leads me to aquestion that I haven't asked
and just start regular everydaytalks.
How did you hear about this?
(21:56):
How did you hear about BIND?
Bre (21:57):
Um, actually, um, I actually heard from you guys,
um, from my neurologist.
Um, I had an appointment.
I was, um, telling mom once Icame home, Hey, um, I gotta find
something to do.
I just don't want to sit hereand not do nothing.
(22:18):
And, uh, my neurologist, shesaid, hey, try this program
called BIND.
And, uh, I was so curious and,uh, interested in doing it, uh,
signed myself up and, uh, madeit happen.
That's great.
And I'm here with you guys.
Mm hmm.
Carrie (22:34):
That's awesome.
Yeah, it's a great part of, Iknow, our routine, you know.
When I first started, I camefive days a week, and that got
overwhelming after a while, so Idon't come five days a week
anymore.
But I stay busy, but yeah.
But that's great that you heardfrom a neurologist.
That's a new one.
I haven't heard that one yet.
I thought you were going to sayPate or Rehab without Walls
Kezia (22:53):
yeah, that's awesome.
And I actually really like thatyou're interested in coming.
I think that's also good thatyou had your own, your own push,
right?
Oh, yes.
And then, right now, do you haveany goals for your, like,
upcoming, you know, your goals,whether they're mini or big,
whatever they are, like, foryour future, and, like, how much
(23:15):
you're investing in yourself.
Like, do you have any goals?
Bre (23:19):
Oh yes, um, my goals overall, overall goals are just
to, uh, be a better version ofme than I once was before my
injury.
Um, just being, uh, mentally,um, physically, spiritually,
(23:39):
just, just, um, try to be thebest that I can be.
That's all, that's my main goal,and overall.
Carrie (23:47):
That's great, I love it.
So, I mean, you're a fairly newbrain injury survivor.
Um, is there anything that you'dlike to share to our listeners,
and our just new survivors, thatyou've learned for a positive,
for them, for recovering, in thebeginning of recovery, like,
anything you want to let peopleknow?
Bre (24:08):
Um, yes, um, for all the, um, brain injury people, and the
future brain injury peoplecoming about.
Just keep going.
Please don't stop.
The more you keep going, thebetter you're going to become.
Yep.
Um, that's all I have to say.
Just keep going.
It's going to be rough.
It's going to be hard.
(24:29):
You're going to have your mentalbreakdowns, you know, go through
your depression, your stress,but just keep going.
The moment you stop, it's whenit all started falling down, but
you keep going, you're going tokeep getting better for sure.
Carrie (24:46):
I 100 percent agree with you, Bre.
That is a great mentality tohave and I'm so glad you're here
and I'm so glad to see yourpositivity.
That makes me smile and makes mehappy.
Thank you.
But we do appreciate you so muchfor having the courage to come
on and share your story becauseit's not our normal brain injury
story that we share.
Thank you so much for being apart of our podcast.
Bre (25:05):
Thank you guys for having me.
Thank you.
Kezia (25:08):
And of course, of course, not only thank you, um, thank
you guys that are listening, um,but of course if you would like
to contact us, uh, from BIND,uh, from BIND.
and the podcast, you can alwaysemail us at
bindwaves@thebind.org Follow ourInstagram account, which is of
(25:30):
course at bindwaves, uh, andvisit our website, uh, which is
the bind.org/bindwaves And ofcourse, if you are interested in
any of becoming either a memberlike Bre uh, you can always go
on our website and fill out the,uh, the forms.
Carrie (25:50):
And again, don't forget to click that like button, that
share button, that subscribebutton, and if you're on
YouTube, that notify button, andjust continue listening on all
your favorite platforms.
Kezia (26:03):
Like I said earlier, every Thursday you will find us
in your favorite platforms, sodon't miss out.
Until next time!
Carrie (26:11):
Until next time!
We hope you've enjoyed listeningto BIND Waves and continue to
support BIND and our non profitmission.
We support brain injurysurvivors as they reconnect into
the life, the community, andtheir workplace.
And we couldn't do that withoutgreat listeners like you.
We appreciate each and every oneof you.
Continue watching.
Until next time.
Until next time.
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